1 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:23,424 Hello and welcome to a Grand Tour special, 2 00:00:23,491 --> 00:00:26,427 which begins with this: the Volkswagen Beetle. 3 00:00:26,494 --> 00:00:28,462 It's a car we hate very much 4 00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:31,999 because it appeals only to Nazis and hippies, 5 00:00:32,066 --> 00:00:35,069 and we are neither of those things. 6 00:00:35,136 --> 00:00:37,538 However, if you remove the bodywork 7 00:00:37,605 --> 00:00:40,007 and replace it with something a bit more fun - 8 00:00:40,074 --> 00:00:41,275 something like this-- 9 00:00:41,342 --> 00:00:43,377 you end up with a beach buggy, 10 00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:45,346 and that's brilliant. 11 00:00:45,413 --> 00:00:47,415 We love beach buggies. 12 00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,850 However, Mr. Wilman disagrees. 13 00:00:49,917 --> 00:00:52,120 He says that if they'd been any good, 14 00:00:52,186 --> 00:00:53,554 they would have caught on, 15 00:00:53,621 --> 00:00:56,023 and he points out that they didn't. 16 00:00:56,090 --> 00:00:59,827 So he hatched a plan. And it's this: 17 00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:03,397 he said all three of us must buy a Volkswagen Beetle, 18 00:01:03,464 --> 00:01:05,633 turn it into a beach buggy, 19 00:01:05,699 --> 00:01:06,867 and then report with it 20 00:01:06,934 --> 00:01:11,172 to a wild, rugged and extremely remote place-- 21 00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:14,675 here on the coast of Namibia. 22 00:01:34,328 --> 00:01:36,364 (ENGINE RUMBLES) 23 00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:38,266 (SURF GUITAR MUSIC) 24 00:01:38,332 --> 00:01:40,168 This is what I've built. 25 00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:43,971 It's as close as you can possibly get 26 00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:47,175 to the original 1964 beach buggy 27 00:01:47,208 --> 00:01:48,809 built by Bruce Meyers. 28 00:01:51,379 --> 00:01:55,549 Underneath, it is a 1950s Beetle-- 29 00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:57,451 Beetle floorpan, Beetle suspension, 30 00:01:57,518 --> 00:01:59,253 Beetle engine, Beetle gearbox. 31 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:00,621 It's got Beetle lights on it. 32 00:02:00,688 --> 00:02:02,290 I've even got a Beetle speedometer 33 00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:04,192 and Beetle hubcaps. 34 00:02:05,359 --> 00:02:07,195 It's brilliant! 35 00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:14,535 This is a beach buggy very like the one that Steve McQueen drove 36 00:02:14,602 --> 00:02:16,337 in the original Thomas Crown Affair. 37 00:02:16,404 --> 00:02:18,406 - And if it's good enough-- - (HORN TOOTS) 38 00:02:18,472 --> 00:02:22,009 - Oh, God. - Ha-ha! 39 00:02:22,075 --> 00:02:24,612 I've been joined by the 1970s. 40 00:02:24,678 --> 00:02:26,814 * T.REX: "20th Century Boy" 41 00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:30,251 Yes. 42 00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:34,655 James May has built what a beach buggy was, 43 00:02:34,722 --> 00:02:37,891 what I've built is what a beach buggy can be... 44 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:43,431 ...if you have a bit of imagination 45 00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:46,234 and some purple metal-flake paint. 46 00:02:46,234 --> 00:02:48,035 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 47 00:02:48,101 --> 00:02:53,907 * Twentieth century toy, I wanna be your boy... * 48 00:02:53,974 --> 00:02:57,411 There, I believe, is the start point of our adventure. 49 00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:01,749 * I wanna be your boy... * 50 00:03:04,418 --> 00:03:06,820 JEREMY: What an extraordinary place. 51 00:03:06,887 --> 00:03:10,424 It's amazing, isn't it? I mean, more seals. 52 00:03:10,491 --> 00:03:13,060 What David Attenborough never told us about those 53 00:03:13,126 --> 00:03:15,996 is how bad they smell. 54 00:03:16,063 --> 00:03:20,401 JEREMY: Sadly, before our nature documentary could go any further, 55 00:03:20,468 --> 00:03:23,571 Richard Hammond emerged from the mist. 56 00:03:23,637 --> 00:03:26,907 Ooh, hello. That's not a beach buggy. 57 00:03:26,974 --> 00:03:29,943 - Is it? - Well, I wouldn't call that... 58 00:03:30,010 --> 00:03:32,313 - Ah-ha! - Oh, geez. 59 00:03:32,380 --> 00:03:33,947 Ladies and gentlemen, Dick-tari! 60 00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:36,284 RICHARD: Behold! 61 00:03:37,285 --> 00:03:38,486 JAMES: What are you wearing? 62 00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:40,288 What are you wearing? 63 00:03:40,288 --> 00:03:41,489 Well, I'm in Africa! 64 00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:43,023 - (JAMES LAUGHS) - These trousers, 65 00:03:43,090 --> 00:03:44,458 did they say in the shop, 66 00:03:44,525 --> 00:03:46,093 "I'm afraid they are yellow, sir"? 67 00:03:46,159 --> 00:03:47,495 When you left, they went, "Yes! 68 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:50,197 20 years we've had those on the hanger!" 69 00:03:50,298 --> 00:03:51,565 - (THEY LAUGH) - Shut up. 70 00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:53,066 And then we must move over to this. 71 00:03:53,133 --> 00:03:54,902 - Yeah. - We were told 72 00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:56,904 to build beach buggies. 73 00:03:56,970 --> 00:03:58,572 - Yes. - Beach buggies. 74 00:03:58,639 --> 00:04:00,441 JAMES: It's not a beach buggy. JEREMY: It isn't. 75 00:04:00,508 --> 00:04:01,842 RICHARD: It is a beach buggy. 76 00:04:01,909 --> 00:04:03,611 It isn't a beach buggy. It's got a roof! 77 00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:05,346 There's no Beetle in here at all. 78 00:04:05,413 --> 00:04:07,515 Yes, there is. Beetle engine in there. 79 00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:10,551 OK, this space-frame chassis... 80 00:04:10,618 --> 00:04:12,185 - Yeah. - Is it from a Beetle? 81 00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:15,323 - No. - These enormous suspension components 82 00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:17,224 that don't even fit under the bodywork. 83 00:04:17,325 --> 00:04:20,761 - You've got two lots of suspension at the back. - Twin shocks. 84 00:04:20,828 --> 00:04:24,965 - Twin shocks? - I like an off-road sort of vibe. 85 00:04:25,032 --> 00:04:27,200 To get here, we had to drive on a beach. 86 00:04:27,335 --> 00:04:28,802 -Yeah. -Ours have made it. 87 00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:31,104 I didn't need two lots of rear suspension on mine. 88 00:04:31,171 --> 00:04:32,373 Neither did I. 89 00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:34,207 Look, we were told to come to Africa. 90 00:04:34,342 --> 00:04:38,979 If we'd been told to go to Santa Monica Beach, then this, with its... 91 00:04:39,046 --> 00:04:40,047 (JEREMY CLEARS HIS THROAT) 92 00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:41,815 ...incredibly vivid paint... 93 00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:44,051 That's the most metal flake I've ever seen. 94 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:45,353 Any beach in the world. 95 00:04:45,386 --> 00:04:47,020 Um... 96 00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:49,690 - Hang on, what's that? - That's the engine. 97 00:04:49,757 --> 00:04:52,225 - What engine is it? - V8! 98 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:53,961 I've put a V8 in a beach buggy! 99 00:04:54,027 --> 00:04:55,262 Well, no, you haven't. 100 00:04:55,363 --> 00:04:57,230 You've parked your beach buggy quite close. 101 00:04:57,365 --> 00:04:58,566 It's not in it! 102 00:04:58,632 --> 00:04:59,933 - It isn't in it. - (RICHARD LAUGHS) No. 103 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,068 You've reversed into a V8, 104 00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:02,436 but not quite hard enough. 105 00:05:02,503 --> 00:05:04,004 It's only gone in a third of the way. 106 00:05:04,071 --> 00:05:05,773 Do you have any idea how difficult it is 107 00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:07,808 to fit a V8 to a beach buggy? 108 00:05:07,875 --> 00:05:09,377 - Well, it doesn't fit! - It's obviously impossible. 109 00:05:09,377 --> 00:05:10,978 Exactly, it's impossible. 110 00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:12,580 This is no ordinary V8. 111 00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,014 It started out in life 112 00:05:14,081 --> 00:05:16,149 as a 3.5 litre V8 from a Range Rover, 113 00:05:16,216 --> 00:05:21,288 but I've modified it, so it produces 180 horsepower. 114 00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:23,256 Can I just say, you were doubting 115 00:05:23,391 --> 00:05:25,092 the credibility of mine as a beach buggy. 116 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,494 Yeah. 117 00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:28,228 The defining characteristic of a beach buggy 118 00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:30,831 is an air-cooled, flat-four Beetle engine. 119 00:05:30,898 --> 00:05:31,832 (CLEARS THROAT) 120 00:05:31,899 --> 00:05:33,401 No, that's not an engine, James. 121 00:05:33,401 --> 00:05:34,602 That's just a fan. 122 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,103 How many horsepower does yours have? 123 00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,405 94! 124 00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:39,306 So I have twice as many horsepower. 125 00:05:39,407 --> 00:05:41,542 - Shall I tell you something? - They're not in the car, though. 126 00:05:41,609 --> 00:05:43,411 - They are, they're near it. - Yes. 127 00:05:43,411 --> 00:05:45,746 It's interesting, isn't it? I mean, that is an entire-- 128 00:05:45,813 --> 00:05:47,080 Nothing about that is interesting. 129 00:05:47,147 --> 00:05:48,416 This is a blank canvas 130 00:05:48,416 --> 00:05:49,483 onto which you could paint your personality. 131 00:05:49,550 --> 00:05:51,118 - Yes. - Yours has got 132 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:52,886 a prolapsed V8 hanging out of its backside 133 00:05:52,953 --> 00:05:54,121 and terrible paint. 134 00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:55,523 Mine is a rather magnificent 135 00:05:55,589 --> 00:05:56,890 "Daktari"-themed off-roader. 136 00:05:56,957 --> 00:05:59,292 (LAUGHS) That's got nothing on it! 137 00:05:59,427 --> 00:06:01,028 - You can express... - JEREMY: It is a bit boring. 138 00:06:01,094 --> 00:06:02,696 ...all your personality, and it's standard. 139 00:06:02,763 --> 00:06:04,264 It's not... What do you mean, standard? 140 00:06:04,331 --> 00:06:05,433 It's a beach buggy. 141 00:06:05,499 --> 00:06:06,867 - It's tasteful. - (BLEEPING) 142 00:06:06,934 --> 00:06:08,101 What? 143 00:06:09,437 --> 00:06:12,105 - Oh. - The bat sat-phone. 144 00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:13,641 We've got a message from... 145 00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:15,509 Mr. Wilman. 146 00:06:15,576 --> 00:06:16,844 RICHARD: Right, go on. 147 00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:18,245 "Since you're in beach buggies..." 148 00:06:18,311 --> 00:06:19,913 Well, us two are. 149 00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:21,882 "Since you're in beach buggies, 150 00:06:21,949 --> 00:06:25,052 you will now drive to the beach." 151 00:06:25,118 --> 00:06:26,186 Uh... (LAUGHS) 152 00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:27,354 Uh...do you think 153 00:06:27,455 --> 00:06:28,956 he's taken leave of his senses? 154 00:06:29,022 --> 00:06:30,791 Well, he was never that good at geography, was he? 155 00:06:30,858 --> 00:06:32,893 No, he wasn't. "You'll now drive to the beach." 156 00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:34,294 Hold on. Oh, no, there's more. 157 00:06:34,361 --> 00:06:36,096 "The beach to which you will drive 158 00:06:36,163 --> 00:06:41,168 is located on the crocodile-infested Kunene River 159 00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:46,139 at the northernmost point of Namibia, where it meets Angola. 160 00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:48,175 It's 1,000 miles away." 161 00:06:49,677 --> 00:06:53,180 - 1,000 miles? - 1,000. 162 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:56,116 JEREMY: What we needed at this point was a map, 163 00:06:56,183 --> 00:06:59,219 so we decided to head north up the coast 164 00:06:59,286 --> 00:07:01,054 and find the nearest town. 165 00:07:01,121 --> 00:07:03,491 JEREMY: Let the journey begin! 166 00:07:03,524 --> 00:07:05,493 (ENGINES REV) 167 00:07:07,895 --> 00:07:10,831 JEREMY: And what a journey it would be in these cars, 168 00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:14,702 cars that were born in interesting times. 169 00:07:16,504 --> 00:07:18,972 So, it's 1964, 170 00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:22,175 the word "teenager" has started to appear 171 00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:23,644 in the world's dictionaries, 172 00:07:23,711 --> 00:07:26,547 people are listening to new types of music, 173 00:07:26,614 --> 00:07:29,683 they're smoking new types of stuff. 174 00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:33,954 And then, in California, the beach buggy arrived! 175 00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:35,222 (ENGINES RUMBLE) 176 00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:40,594 It was perfect! 177 00:07:40,661 --> 00:07:43,330 Girls and boys, beach barbecues... 178 00:07:43,396 --> 00:07:46,900 The first design criteria was that the front fenders were flat, 179 00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:49,202 so you could stand a beer on it. 180 00:07:49,269 --> 00:07:51,038 That's how you design a car! 181 00:07:54,842 --> 00:07:59,547 Jimi Hendrix had a beach buggy and President Nixon didn't. 182 00:07:59,580 --> 00:08:01,549 Tells you all you need to know. 183 00:08:03,951 --> 00:08:07,354 What I really like about the beach buggy is that it's a testament 184 00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:10,991 to the ability of the human spirit to triumph. 185 00:08:11,058 --> 00:08:12,960 Because somebody looked at the Beetle and said, 186 00:08:13,026 --> 00:08:17,364 "Well, that's the legacy of the world's worst dictator. 187 00:08:17,430 --> 00:08:19,266 Let's turn it into a beach car." 188 00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:24,805 JEREMY: After a lonely hour 189 00:08:24,872 --> 00:08:27,007 of driving north through the swirling mist, 190 00:08:27,074 --> 00:08:29,677 we still hadn't found a town, 191 00:08:29,743 --> 00:08:32,880 but we did find something else. 192 00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:35,583 Jesus. 193 00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:57,605 JEREMY: I'll tell you what, 194 00:08:57,671 --> 00:08:59,439 he must have been going at a right old lick 195 00:08:59,506 --> 00:09:00,608 when he hit the beach. 196 00:09:00,608 --> 00:09:01,809 RICHARD: He must have been. 197 00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,811 Right, the sea is there. 198 00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:05,445 That's half a mile away. 199 00:09:05,512 --> 00:09:06,513 JAMES: I'd say so. 200 00:09:06,614 --> 00:09:07,848 So he got it up the beach, 201 00:09:07,915 --> 00:09:09,382 and then sort of did a handbrake turn. 202 00:09:09,449 --> 00:09:11,685 -Power-slided it in. -How do you do a handbrake... 203 00:09:11,752 --> 00:09:14,054 RICHARD: How did it get here, seriously? 204 00:09:14,121 --> 00:09:16,857 Can I just say... my nipples are erect. 205 00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:19,226 - What, 'cause of this jacket? - No. 206 00:09:19,292 --> 00:09:20,628 - Oh. - It's cold. 207 00:09:20,661 --> 00:09:23,063 - It is, isn't it? - It's cold. 208 00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:25,432 That's an unwise wardrobe strategy. 209 00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:26,667 Yeah, well, you know, 210 00:09:26,734 --> 00:09:28,936 Africa, on a beach, I thought... 211 00:09:29,002 --> 00:09:30,771 - So did I. - I'm surprised. 212 00:09:32,239 --> 00:09:35,308 The beach has got the sea haar on it - 213 00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:37,144 mist, fog, cold. 214 00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:40,313 - If you look over there... - Hm. 215 00:09:40,380 --> 00:09:42,015 ...sunshine, blue sky. 216 00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:44,652 - Why don't we just go inland... - The coast road. 217 00:09:44,652 --> 00:09:47,354 Find the coast road which will take us to a town. 218 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,723 And that'll be in the sun. That's a better idea. 219 00:09:50,924 --> 00:09:52,325 JEREMY: With a plan worked out, 220 00:09:52,392 --> 00:09:54,662 it was time to get moving again. 221 00:09:54,695 --> 00:09:56,830 (ENGINE IGNITION FAILS) 222 00:09:58,766 --> 00:10:00,067 Oh, dear. 223 00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:02,169 JAMES: Did you modify the battery as well? 224 00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:04,304 - (IGNITION FAILS) - RICHARD: Oh... 225 00:10:04,371 --> 00:10:07,775 - It's obviously not charging up. - No. 226 00:10:07,841 --> 00:10:09,576 Because I didn't modify it. 227 00:10:09,643 --> 00:10:10,744 Yeah. 228 00:10:10,811 --> 00:10:12,512 I'll just see if mine works. 229 00:10:12,579 --> 00:10:14,047 (ENGINE STARTS) 230 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:16,449 - Oh, yeah. - Let me just try mine. 231 00:10:16,516 --> 00:10:18,752 - (ENGINE STARTS) - Yeah. 232 00:10:18,819 --> 00:10:20,888 - Push? - Hm? 233 00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:24,124 - Can I have a push? - (ENGINES REV) 234 00:10:31,231 --> 00:10:33,967 JEREMY: After the film crew had got me going, 235 00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:37,971 I used my massive horsepower to catch the others. 236 00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:47,247 But by the time we were back together again... 237 00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:50,383 it was going dark. 238 00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:54,187 The sun, as you can see over my shoulder, has set, 239 00:10:54,254 --> 00:10:56,724 and we still haven't found a road. 240 00:10:56,790 --> 00:11:00,093 It's also going to be very, very, very cold. 241 00:11:01,762 --> 00:11:03,096 Lights on. 242 00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:12,439 RICHARD: We have got to find this road. 243 00:11:13,907 --> 00:11:15,876 This is not going to be too clever... 244 00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:18,411 in the dark. 245 00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:27,120 I've rather crudely rigged up my torch, 246 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:29,923 wedged in the windscreen rail, 247 00:11:29,990 --> 00:11:33,994 in the hope that you can see my last pieces to camera. 248 00:11:37,831 --> 00:11:39,466 Oh, bollocks! 249 00:11:42,302 --> 00:11:43,771 (INHALES SHARPLY) 250 00:11:43,837 --> 00:11:45,405 Oh, cold! 251 00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:50,377 JEREMY: Finally, though, 252 00:11:50,443 --> 00:11:53,680 it looked like our luck had changed. 253 00:11:53,781 --> 00:11:55,648 Ooh, hello! Hello! 254 00:11:55,783 --> 00:11:57,117 What's that? 255 00:12:03,623 --> 00:12:05,325 - It's not a hotel. - No. 256 00:12:07,795 --> 00:12:09,462 It smells of excrement! 257 00:12:09,529 --> 00:12:10,630 JAMES: Oh, wow, look at this! 258 00:12:10,697 --> 00:12:12,800 There's still, like, plates 259 00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:14,201 and cups and saucers and things in here. 260 00:12:14,267 --> 00:12:15,869 I'll tell you exactly what this is. 261 00:12:15,936 --> 00:12:17,304 It's an abandoned mine. 262 00:12:17,370 --> 00:12:18,405 (JEREMY SNIFFS) 263 00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:20,673 They do mine round in Namibia, don't they? 264 00:12:20,808 --> 00:12:21,942 What do they mine for? 265 00:12:22,009 --> 00:12:23,543 - Diamonds. - Diamonds? 266 00:12:23,610 --> 00:12:26,246 Yeah, but they wouldn't have left if there were any. 267 00:12:26,313 --> 00:12:28,515 They obviously left, and not yesterday. 268 00:12:31,218 --> 00:12:34,454 Look, there's no road here, is there? 269 00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:35,488 - No. - No. 270 00:12:35,555 --> 00:12:36,924 Apart from anything else, 271 00:12:36,990 --> 00:12:38,625 we can't find our way around in the dark 272 00:12:38,691 --> 00:12:39,726 'cause we can't navigate. 273 00:12:39,827 --> 00:12:41,328 - Well, I can. - How? 274 00:12:41,394 --> 00:12:42,963 - How? - Stars. 275 00:12:43,030 --> 00:12:44,397 - No, you can't. - I can. 276 00:12:44,464 --> 00:12:47,835 I can't do very many things, I admit... 277 00:12:47,835 --> 00:12:49,837 ...anything, but I can do that. 278 00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:51,571 How do you navigate by the stars? 279 00:12:51,638 --> 00:12:52,973 Uh... find the Southern Cross. 280 00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:54,574 Yeah, but that's really complicated. 281 00:12:54,641 --> 00:12:57,277 Right, do you want to sleep in the excrement mine? 282 00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:58,645 No, this is out. 283 00:12:58,711 --> 00:13:00,380 So, we have to keep going, 284 00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:02,615 whether we like it or not, till we find... 285 00:13:02,682 --> 00:13:04,251 We have to, so listen. 286 00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:06,753 I shall find the Southern Cross. 287 00:13:06,854 --> 00:13:09,089 You can't find the Southern Cross with a hammer. 288 00:13:09,156 --> 00:13:11,959 I've found it! Ha! I've found it. It's there. 289 00:13:12,025 --> 00:13:13,560 It's like a kite. 290 00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:14,995 - That one there? - Yeah. 291 00:13:15,062 --> 00:13:16,864 It's a kite shape. It's sort of... 292 00:13:16,930 --> 00:13:20,733 Now, you take the long axis, yes? 293 00:13:20,868 --> 00:13:21,869 - Yes. - Mm-hm. 294 00:13:21,902 --> 00:13:24,004 And draw an imaginary line 295 00:13:24,071 --> 00:13:27,474 through it, down to the horizon. 296 00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:29,076 Yes? Now, you intersect it 297 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:32,212 from a line drawn between two other stars, 298 00:13:32,279 --> 00:13:35,048 and where those two imaginary lines meet, 299 00:13:35,115 --> 00:13:38,618 directly underneath it is due south. 300 00:13:38,685 --> 00:13:40,653 So if it's those two-- 301 00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:42,455 which it is, I'm sure of it-- 302 00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:44,491 you draw a line... 303 00:13:44,557 --> 00:13:46,493 (ENGINE RUMBLES) 304 00:13:49,796 --> 00:13:52,399 Oh, this is a bad idea! 305 00:13:52,465 --> 00:13:55,135 We are now trusting our lives to an orangutan 306 00:13:55,202 --> 00:13:57,004 who thinks he's Patrick Moore. 307 00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:02,609 There it is. There's the two stars. 308 00:14:03,911 --> 00:14:06,713 Draw a line... 309 00:14:06,779 --> 00:14:10,183 I'm not getting many directions from you, Jeremy. Is this right? 310 00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:12,920 You're heading a little bit too much to the right. 311 00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:15,022 You need to go left a bit. 312 00:14:15,088 --> 00:14:17,991 Good, good. Oh, I'm so confident. 313 00:14:18,058 --> 00:14:23,296 You two are going to be eating humble pie when the sun comes up. 314 00:14:27,167 --> 00:14:28,835 RICHARD: Despite the confidence 315 00:14:28,936 --> 00:14:30,603 of Jeremy Columbus, 316 00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:33,040 no road appeared. 317 00:14:34,674 --> 00:14:36,076 Oh, this is grim. 318 00:14:40,047 --> 00:14:42,315 Excuse me. 319 00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:45,418 I've been on the go a very, very long time now. 320 00:14:47,654 --> 00:14:52,125 RICHARD: Guys, I'm sorry. I'm not driving another inch. 321 00:14:52,192 --> 00:14:53,994 I can't do this. 322 00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:55,495 It's three o'clock in the morning. 323 00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:56,964 I'm exhausted. 324 00:14:56,964 --> 00:14:59,466 JEREMY: He does have a point. 325 00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:07,340 RICHARD: The next morning, 326 00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:10,043 we woke, having slept on the sand, 327 00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:12,645 huddled round our engines for warmth. 328 00:15:16,984 --> 00:15:19,052 (ENGINE STARTS) 329 00:15:29,129 --> 00:15:31,464 (INDISTINCT SHOUTING) 330 00:15:34,101 --> 00:15:35,668 (HORN TOOTS) 331 00:15:41,141 --> 00:15:43,310 JAMES: You muppet. What's that? 332 00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:44,377 Um... 333 00:15:45,712 --> 00:15:48,015 "Um" what? 334 00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:51,084 I never knew Namibia had two seas. 335 00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:52,519 It doesn't have two seas. 336 00:15:52,585 --> 00:15:54,187 No, it has one massive "cee" in it. 337 00:15:54,254 --> 00:15:55,655 One massive, stupid "cee" 338 00:15:55,722 --> 00:15:57,657 that's navigated us back to where we started. 339 00:15:57,724 --> 00:15:59,726 - Can I just say... - It wasn't my... I... 340 00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:02,029 Why did we even believe you could navigate by the stars? 341 00:16:02,095 --> 00:16:03,430 You can't even read a compass. 342 00:16:03,496 --> 00:16:06,099 There are two "cees". There's two "cees" here 343 00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:08,268 for believing that that "cee" could navigate us. 344 00:16:08,335 --> 00:16:10,370 - No, you're right. - I couldn't possibly... 345 00:16:10,437 --> 00:16:12,872 Really, I don't understand that. 346 00:16:12,939 --> 00:16:15,775 JAMES: Freezing cold, sandpapered on the face... 347 00:16:15,842 --> 00:16:18,278 - You've got a coat on. - It's thin. Have you felt it? 348 00:16:18,345 --> 00:16:20,180 I haven't even got a thin coat. 349 00:16:20,247 --> 00:16:21,581 I've only got a T-shirt. Anyway, 350 00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:23,150 I'm not going to be competitive with you 351 00:16:23,216 --> 00:16:24,551 about who's the coldest. 352 00:16:24,617 --> 00:16:26,453 - I'm the coldest! - We're all the lostest. 353 00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:28,821 Never mind. Look, let's not get bogged down 354 00:16:28,888 --> 00:16:30,223 with whose fault it was. 355 00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:32,159 There's no being bogged down with it, is there? 356 00:16:32,225 --> 00:16:34,127 It was yours. 357 00:16:34,194 --> 00:16:35,962 We can either go back into the desert 358 00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:37,564 to look for a road, 359 00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,966 or we can just do what we were doing yesterday, 360 00:16:40,067 --> 00:16:41,534 and stay on the beach. 361 00:16:41,601 --> 00:16:43,970 At least we know, if we keep the sea on our left, 362 00:16:44,071 --> 00:16:45,238 we're going north. 363 00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:46,673 - Yes. - That's a fair point. 364 00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:49,242 - Let's navigate by the sea. - JEREMY: Yes. 365 00:16:50,543 --> 00:16:53,113 JEREMY: With our new-- well, newish-- 366 00:16:53,180 --> 00:16:54,314 plan in place, 367 00:16:54,381 --> 00:16:56,183 we set off once more. 368 00:16:57,784 --> 00:17:01,754 So here we are. These are our wheel marks from yesterday. 369 00:17:02,955 --> 00:17:06,393 24 hours of cold, misery... 370 00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:08,428 to achieve exactly nothing. 371 00:17:08,495 --> 00:17:11,131 I mean, it is exactly nothing. 372 00:17:11,198 --> 00:17:14,501 But, apart from that and the weather... 373 00:17:14,567 --> 00:17:19,406 and Jeremy Clarkson, it's all going really well. 374 00:17:19,472 --> 00:17:21,274 JEREMY: As we continued north, 375 00:17:21,341 --> 00:17:23,776 the misery of the previous day was banished 376 00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:27,580 by the sheer bigness of our surroundings. 377 00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:30,583 Oh, this is an astonishing place. 378 00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:37,457 I've got a dune the size of Mount Everest to my right, 379 00:17:37,524 --> 00:17:40,727 the Atlantic Ocean to my left... 380 00:17:40,793 --> 00:17:41,861 (LAUGHS) 381 00:17:41,928 --> 00:17:44,697 This is absolutely epic. 382 00:17:53,306 --> 00:17:55,142 This is proper beach buggy driving. 383 00:17:55,208 --> 00:17:58,611 Sun's out, sea's there with the surf. 384 00:17:58,678 --> 00:18:00,580 It's like being in the Beach Boys. 385 00:18:03,150 --> 00:18:05,352 (LAUGHS) 386 00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,554 JEREMY: Amidst all this loveliness, though, 387 00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:12,825 there was one small elephant edging its way into the room. 388 00:18:12,892 --> 00:18:14,727 Chaps, I don't want to have to say this, 389 00:18:14,794 --> 00:18:18,231 but is the tide coming in or going out? 390 00:18:20,167 --> 00:18:22,702 RICHARD: Uh...I'm guessing in. 391 00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:27,307 There's no way up the sides of that. 392 00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:32,011 And if the tide comes in that far, which it does, 393 00:18:32,078 --> 00:18:34,181 we've had it. 394 00:18:34,247 --> 00:18:35,815 Got to keep moving here. 395 00:18:35,882 --> 00:18:37,517 We cannot afford to get stuck. 396 00:18:41,754 --> 00:18:44,191 JEREMY: With some generous use of the throttle, 397 00:18:44,191 --> 00:18:45,625 we managed to get clear 398 00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:48,595 of the sea-and-sand-dune pincer movement. 399 00:18:48,661 --> 00:18:51,631 But then we had another problem. 400 00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:56,703 I'd say that was the end of the beach. 401 00:18:57,937 --> 00:18:59,772 RICHARD: How does that just end like that? 402 00:18:59,839 --> 00:19:01,708 JEREMY: It does just end. JAMES: That is the end. 403 00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:04,043 JEREMY: And the Namibian government doesn't allow us 404 00:19:04,110 --> 00:19:06,679 to drive on the salt pans, and that's what that is. 405 00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:08,315 This meant, according to James, 406 00:19:08,381 --> 00:19:11,684 we had only one option. 407 00:19:11,751 --> 00:19:13,553 We've got to go back the way we came. 408 00:19:13,620 --> 00:19:14,987 But if the tide's coming in, 409 00:19:15,054 --> 00:19:18,325 that narrow bit will have become impassable. 410 00:19:18,391 --> 00:19:22,028 That's why I think if we see a good opportunity to turn left, 411 00:19:22,094 --> 00:19:24,364 like we did last night, we do it. 412 00:19:24,431 --> 00:19:26,399 Are you honestly suggesting we go back in the... 413 00:19:26,466 --> 00:19:28,235 Well, where else can we go? 414 00:19:28,235 --> 00:19:30,337 We'll either drown or starve otherwise. 415 00:19:36,243 --> 00:19:37,677 Right, we've just got to find a bit 416 00:19:37,744 --> 00:19:41,748 where we can get inland before the tide comes in. 417 00:19:47,287 --> 00:19:49,822 That is getting closer to that, 418 00:19:49,889 --> 00:19:51,624 and when that happens, we've had it. 419 00:19:56,263 --> 00:19:57,964 RICHARD: But as we thundered along, 420 00:19:58,030 --> 00:20:01,468 the dunes refused to open up and let us in. 421 00:20:03,135 --> 00:20:04,504 That's the sea! 422 00:20:05,405 --> 00:20:07,274 It's the sea, there! 423 00:20:08,975 --> 00:20:10,510 Oh, it's coming at me! 424 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:15,582 JEREMY: I still say we can't get out here, look. 425 00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,550 No left turn at the moment. 426 00:20:21,454 --> 00:20:23,723 This is where you need a V8! 427 00:20:23,790 --> 00:20:24,991 (ENGINE REVS) 428 00:20:27,193 --> 00:20:28,395 Oh, shit. 429 00:20:29,829 --> 00:20:32,332 Oh, Jeremy's in trouble! 430 00:20:32,399 --> 00:20:34,100 That is not looking good! 431 00:20:34,166 --> 00:20:35,368 (ENGINE REVS) 432 00:20:35,435 --> 00:20:37,103 Come on, come on. Whoa. 433 00:20:37,169 --> 00:20:38,871 (ENGINE REVS) 434 00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:40,707 Oh, no. 435 00:20:40,773 --> 00:20:42,842 (ENGINE REVS) 436 00:20:42,909 --> 00:20:45,645 Oh, no. No, no, no. Not a good place. 437 00:20:45,712 --> 00:20:48,114 - (ENGINE REVS) - Oh, God. 438 00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:49,816 Uh...I'm in the sea. 439 00:20:51,384 --> 00:20:53,453 Because it was a bit of an emergency, 440 00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:56,255 my colleagues decided to help for once. 441 00:20:56,323 --> 00:20:59,058 - Go. - (ENGINE WHIRRS) 442 00:20:59,125 --> 00:21:00,192 JAMES: No. 443 00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,894 Is that just spinning? 444 00:21:01,961 --> 00:21:03,530 It's beached under there. 445 00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,498 I don't see why I can't push him with that. 446 00:21:05,565 --> 00:21:07,800 -All right, then. Try. -All right. 447 00:21:07,867 --> 00:21:09,569 James, count us in. 448 00:21:09,636 --> 00:21:12,038 Three, two, one, away! 449 00:21:17,644 --> 00:21:20,347 JEREMY: Yes! RICHARD: Right, let's go! 450 00:21:22,349 --> 00:21:27,086 Me getting beached cost us time we never had in the first place, 451 00:21:27,153 --> 00:21:29,422 and we were still trapped. 452 00:21:32,825 --> 00:21:34,060 Jesus Christ. 453 00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:37,830 Ah, it's coming in. 454 00:21:41,501 --> 00:21:43,670 Come on, come on, come on. 455 00:21:45,204 --> 00:21:46,506 Come on. 456 00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:49,075 Whoa! 457 00:21:54,381 --> 00:21:55,615 Oh! 458 00:21:57,249 --> 00:21:58,518 Oh, that's bad. 459 00:22:02,188 --> 00:22:03,222 Shit. 460 00:22:03,289 --> 00:22:04,724 (ENGINE REVS) 461 00:22:05,925 --> 00:22:06,993 Whoa! 462 00:22:09,629 --> 00:22:11,097 Come on, baby, come on. 463 00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:17,504 RICHARD: Mercifully, the dunes finally started to fall away 464 00:22:17,570 --> 00:22:19,572 and we were saved. 465 00:22:22,509 --> 00:22:25,512 -And we're through! -We are, we are. 466 00:22:25,578 --> 00:22:26,879 That's a relief. 467 00:22:29,516 --> 00:22:31,083 So nearly got stuck then. 468 00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:37,657 RICHARD: We'd now been on the go for 36 hours, 469 00:22:37,724 --> 00:22:42,662 and we were pretty much back where we started from... again. 470 00:22:42,729 --> 00:22:45,665 We were also soaked, frozen, worn out, 471 00:22:45,732 --> 00:22:47,667 and because we had no food with us, 472 00:22:47,734 --> 00:22:49,802 we were also hungry. 473 00:22:49,869 --> 00:22:53,706 But then Bear Clarkson came to the rescue. 474 00:22:53,773 --> 00:22:57,243 Cold you go and get some driftwood for a fire? 475 00:22:57,309 --> 00:23:01,180 And could you fashion a rudimentary barbecue grill of some sort? 476 00:23:01,247 --> 00:23:03,716 OK. Where did you get the fishing rod from? 477 00:23:03,783 --> 00:23:05,885 It's my whip aerial. It's a beach buggy. 478 00:23:05,952 --> 00:23:08,154 - I thought of that. - They're fishing rods. 479 00:23:15,795 --> 00:23:18,598 This is going to make a perfect little fish grill thing, look. 480 00:23:23,603 --> 00:23:25,137 Have you got a fire lit yet? 481 00:23:25,204 --> 00:23:26,473 I thought you were fishing. 482 00:23:26,473 --> 00:23:28,741 I am fishing. My car's fishing. 483 00:23:28,808 --> 00:23:30,843 - Look. - Well, is it? 484 00:23:30,910 --> 00:23:33,079 - Yeah, look, I've got the rods attached. - It's parked. 485 00:23:33,145 --> 00:23:35,014 JEREMY: What's that? JAMES: That's the grill. 486 00:23:35,081 --> 00:23:37,650 So we hold that with the pliers from my multi-tool, 487 00:23:37,717 --> 00:23:39,652 cut the fish up, fillet it... 488 00:23:39,719 --> 00:23:43,556 Can you do that? There's no point asking him. He can open a tin... 489 00:23:43,623 --> 00:23:45,024 Can you fillet a fish? 490 00:23:45,091 --> 00:23:47,159 - What, is it only fish? - Well, it's the sea! 491 00:23:47,226 --> 00:23:49,829 What did you think I was going to catch, a chicken? 492 00:23:49,896 --> 00:23:51,063 Oh, my God! 493 00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:59,506 RICHARD: Oh, my God! JAMES: No, wait. Yes! 494 00:23:59,506 --> 00:24:01,708 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 495 00:24:01,774 --> 00:24:04,043 While Hammond went off to get more driftwood, 496 00:24:04,110 --> 00:24:07,614 James and I set about gutting the catch. 497 00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:11,283 JEREMY: Use his car as the table. There we go. 498 00:24:11,350 --> 00:24:14,420 - That's his gut. Look. You've got it. - Yeah, right. 499 00:24:14,521 --> 00:24:16,022 Oh, God. Shit. Look, 500 00:24:16,088 --> 00:24:17,857 it's all gone literally onto his exhaust. 501 00:24:17,924 --> 00:24:20,359 Oh, no. Never mind. Look, I need your help. 502 00:24:20,426 --> 00:24:21,794 Right, saw its head off. 503 00:24:23,730 --> 00:24:26,866 - Ah, there we go. - Excellent. 504 00:24:26,933 --> 00:24:29,135 - I think, but I'm not sure-- - It's gone under his seat. 505 00:24:29,201 --> 00:24:30,436 Oh, no. Has it? 506 00:24:30,537 --> 00:24:32,071 It's all right, I'll get it out later. 507 00:24:36,175 --> 00:24:38,177 JAMES: Oh, it's done a treat, this. 508 00:24:38,244 --> 00:24:39,879 Look at this, Hammond. 509 00:24:42,248 --> 00:24:44,450 Mm. 510 00:24:44,551 --> 00:24:45,885 Oh, that's all right, isn't it? 511 00:24:48,020 --> 00:24:49,155 Ooh. 512 00:24:54,727 --> 00:24:56,563 It tastes like fish, doesn't it? 513 00:24:57,730 --> 00:24:59,832 OK, does anybody want a beer? 514 00:25:01,033 --> 00:25:02,401 - JAMES: Have you got some? - No. 515 00:25:02,468 --> 00:25:04,971 - Oh, you... - (JEREMY LAUGHS) 516 00:25:05,037 --> 00:25:07,640 - That deserves a stabbing. - (THEY LAUGH) 517 00:25:07,707 --> 00:25:08,775 That is a proper stabbing. 518 00:25:08,841 --> 00:25:10,109 That's properly out of order. 519 00:25:13,846 --> 00:25:15,181 RICHARD: After lunch, 520 00:25:15,247 --> 00:25:17,850 we set off once more into the dunes. 521 00:25:20,152 --> 00:25:22,822 Right, so let's keep heading east. 522 00:25:22,889 --> 00:25:25,825 And we must come to a road at some... 523 00:25:25,892 --> 00:25:28,628 There has to be a road. 524 00:25:28,695 --> 00:25:31,598 JEREMY: But, for mile after mile, 525 00:25:31,598 --> 00:25:32,899 there wasn't. 526 00:25:44,510 --> 00:25:46,045 It's the Namib Desert. 527 00:25:46,112 --> 00:25:50,983 "Namib" in the local dialect means "big nothing". 528 00:25:56,155 --> 00:26:00,259 It must be the prettiest desert in the world. 529 00:26:00,326 --> 00:26:02,094 It's just a sea of dunes. 530 00:26:07,299 --> 00:26:10,369 JEREMY: Dunes which were getting bigger. 531 00:26:10,436 --> 00:26:13,973 JAMES: Bloody Nora, look at the size of that! 532 00:26:15,942 --> 00:26:20,279 Engaging 180 horsepower. 533 00:26:20,346 --> 00:26:23,382 JEREMY: Climbing them in our two-wheel-drive beach buggies 534 00:26:23,449 --> 00:26:25,084 was becoming tricky. 535 00:26:26,986 --> 00:26:32,191 Come on, you can do this. You can do this! 536 00:26:32,258 --> 00:26:37,296 But by deploying the V8, I was sort of all right. 537 00:26:37,363 --> 00:26:38,464 Yes! 538 00:26:38,530 --> 00:26:41,367 Oh-ho-ho-ho! 539 00:26:41,433 --> 00:26:45,571 Hammond had grippy tyres, so he was all right, too. 540 00:26:45,672 --> 00:26:48,240 Please, make it. Please. 541 00:26:48,307 --> 00:26:49,575 (ENGINE REVS) 542 00:26:49,676 --> 00:26:50,910 Please! 543 00:26:53,045 --> 00:26:54,380 Ho-ho! 544 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:55,948 There you go! 545 00:26:56,015 --> 00:26:58,985 However, back in the 1960s... 546 00:27:01,754 --> 00:27:03,990 Come on, little car. 547 00:27:04,056 --> 00:27:06,425 - (ENGINE SPLUTTERS) - Oh, no, no, no. 548 00:27:06,492 --> 00:27:07,559 No, no. 549 00:27:07,694 --> 00:27:09,328 (ENGINE REVS) 550 00:27:12,164 --> 00:27:13,700 (ENGINE REVS) 551 00:27:19,171 --> 00:27:20,406 - Stuck? - Yes. 552 00:27:20,472 --> 00:27:22,108 Two problems. Number one, 553 00:27:22,174 --> 00:27:24,711 he's put a 90 horsepower engine in it, 554 00:27:24,711 --> 00:27:26,445 which actually is probably only 40. 555 00:27:26,512 --> 00:27:27,847 - Yeah. - And number two, 556 00:27:27,914 --> 00:27:30,717 he will not use full power ever. 557 00:27:30,750 --> 00:27:34,320 Well, he's got a 90 horsepower engine, but a 5 horsepower foot. 558 00:27:34,386 --> 00:27:36,088 (JEREMY LAUGHS) 559 00:27:36,155 --> 00:27:39,125 And I bet you any money he's saying "I had a misfire." 560 00:27:39,191 --> 00:27:40,226 (LAUGHS) 561 00:27:46,999 --> 00:27:48,835 You've got to push the accelerator all the way to-- 562 00:27:48,901 --> 00:27:50,136 I know, but... I know that. 563 00:27:50,202 --> 00:27:52,338 It occasionally has a little misfire moment, 564 00:27:52,404 --> 00:27:53,572 and then I lose it. 565 00:27:53,639 --> 00:27:55,407 - (THEY LAUGH) - He said it! 566 00:27:57,844 --> 00:28:00,346 JEREMY: And so the afternoon continued. 567 00:28:00,412 --> 00:28:04,550 The Grunt Machine and the Grit Machine would forge ahead... 568 00:28:04,616 --> 00:28:08,454 There is no way in hell I'm doing this! 569 00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:10,156 Yes! 570 00:28:13,659 --> 00:28:15,561 You star! 571 00:28:15,627 --> 00:28:16,929 ...and then there'd be 572 00:28:16,996 --> 00:28:19,799 the inevitable radio exchange. 573 00:28:19,866 --> 00:28:21,834 We appear to be a man down, Jeremy. 574 00:28:21,901 --> 00:28:24,403 JEREMY: James May, where are you? 575 00:28:24,470 --> 00:28:25,872 (ENGINE REVS) 576 00:28:29,408 --> 00:28:31,410 JEREMY: Because we spent so much time 577 00:28:31,477 --> 00:28:34,046 waiting for Captain Misfire, 578 00:28:34,113 --> 00:28:37,216 we were still in the desert as dusk fell. 579 00:28:37,283 --> 00:28:41,320 And failing light meant it was hard to spot obstacles. 580 00:28:42,922 --> 00:28:44,623 Right, sit rep. 581 00:28:44,690 --> 00:28:48,027 Jesus (BLEEP) Christ! 582 00:28:48,094 --> 00:28:50,797 - (RICHARD LAUGHS) - Holy... 583 00:28:50,863 --> 00:28:53,199 (CONTINUES LAUGHING) 584 00:28:53,265 --> 00:28:55,701 - (BLEEP) - Oh, my God! 585 00:28:55,802 --> 00:28:58,437 - (RICHARD LAUGHS) - Oh, shit! 586 00:28:58,504 --> 00:29:00,439 RICHARD: Look at it! 587 00:29:00,506 --> 00:29:02,441 Mate, I've got to have a look. 588 00:29:05,411 --> 00:29:08,214 Oh, shitty death... 589 00:29:10,116 --> 00:29:13,019 - I locked up. That was just... - Look, he's buried! 590 00:29:13,085 --> 00:29:16,688 - You've buried the front. - I was completely locked up. 591 00:29:16,823 --> 00:29:18,257 'Cause I would have gone down that. 592 00:29:18,324 --> 00:29:19,826 - (RICHARD LAUGHS) - Look at it! 593 00:29:19,892 --> 00:29:22,361 (RICHARD EXCLAIMS) 594 00:29:22,428 --> 00:29:25,364 My close shave was a reminder that, after dark, 595 00:29:25,431 --> 00:29:29,168 these dunes would become very, very dangerous. 596 00:29:34,540 --> 00:29:37,643 RICHARD: It's getting harder and harder to read the terrain now. 597 00:29:37,709 --> 00:29:39,278 Is that a drop? Is that a hill? 598 00:29:39,345 --> 00:29:41,848 Is that going up? Is that a cliff? What is it? 599 00:29:43,983 --> 00:29:46,018 Peril... peril. 600 00:29:47,453 --> 00:29:48,988 Oh, shit! 601 00:29:49,055 --> 00:29:50,957 Oh, I think there's a drop off there. 602 00:29:51,991 --> 00:29:53,759 It's just a black abyss. 603 00:29:53,860 --> 00:29:57,096 That could be a huge cliff again. 604 00:29:59,999 --> 00:30:02,268 RICHARD: Eventually, we could take no more, 605 00:30:02,334 --> 00:30:07,273 and we had to settle down for a second night around our engines. 606 00:30:07,339 --> 00:30:08,507 (SIGHS) 607 00:30:30,562 --> 00:30:33,699 We will find a road. There must... 608 00:30:33,765 --> 00:30:36,502 - It can't... It can't go on forever, can it? - No. 609 00:30:36,568 --> 00:30:40,472 It has to... There will be a town, a road... something. 610 00:30:42,942 --> 00:30:46,112 RICHARD: Unfortunately, to find salvation, 611 00:30:46,178 --> 00:30:50,249 we still had to climb more dunes. 612 00:30:50,316 --> 00:30:53,953 Climb them and then get down the other side. 613 00:30:54,020 --> 00:30:55,421 Oh, my God! 614 00:30:57,656 --> 00:30:59,191 Well, that's just a cliff! 615 00:31:01,060 --> 00:31:03,329 Whoa! Aargh! 616 00:31:07,366 --> 00:31:08,968 (GRUNTS) 617 00:31:10,002 --> 00:31:13,105 Whoa, this is a monster. 618 00:31:13,172 --> 00:31:16,675 Oh! (BLEEP) I don't think I can do...! 619 00:31:16,742 --> 00:31:19,378 Whoa-ho-ho-ho! 620 00:31:24,450 --> 00:31:28,087 Whoa-a-a-a-a-a! 621 00:31:31,057 --> 00:31:32,324 Here we go. 622 00:31:32,391 --> 00:31:35,127 All three of us simultaneously... 623 00:31:38,965 --> 00:31:40,399 Holy shit. 624 00:31:40,466 --> 00:31:43,069 Oh-h-h-h, shit! 625 00:31:43,135 --> 00:31:46,438 Argh-hhh! Ha-ha! 626 00:31:46,505 --> 00:31:49,408 Whoa-a-a-a-a! 627 00:31:51,010 --> 00:31:52,344 I wasn't scared. 628 00:31:56,782 --> 00:31:58,217 Oh, my God. 629 00:31:58,284 --> 00:32:01,687 Guys, this is the biggest yet by a country mile. 630 00:32:03,689 --> 00:32:06,993 Whoa-a-a-a-a-a! 631 00:32:06,993 --> 00:32:08,460 Is that the size of the drop 632 00:32:08,527 --> 00:32:10,396 or what's happened to his penis? 633 00:32:10,462 --> 00:32:13,265 (LAUGHTER) 634 00:32:13,332 --> 00:32:15,601 Right, then. Let's see what all the fuss is about. 635 00:32:15,667 --> 00:32:17,636 Holy shit! 636 00:32:21,073 --> 00:32:26,012 Oh-h-h-h-h! 637 00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:30,249 Phwoar. 638 00:32:30,316 --> 00:32:32,018 And now straighten those wheels, Richard, 639 00:32:32,051 --> 00:32:33,385 straighten them, 640 00:32:33,452 --> 00:32:35,021 because you've got to go down straight. 641 00:32:35,087 --> 00:32:39,158 Holy shit. Oh-h-h-h-h, shit! 642 00:32:39,225 --> 00:32:41,027 That is frightening. 643 00:32:46,798 --> 00:32:48,834 Love this desert. 644 00:32:48,900 --> 00:32:50,902 I'm never, ever, ever happier 645 00:32:51,037 --> 00:32:53,405 than I am when I'm in a desert. 646 00:32:53,472 --> 00:32:57,609 And this... this is the best desert I've ever been to. 647 00:33:00,246 --> 00:33:02,348 You can never really lose sight of the fact, though, 648 00:33:02,414 --> 00:33:04,050 that what it actually is 649 00:33:04,116 --> 00:33:08,487 is a big, orange killing engine. 650 00:33:08,554 --> 00:33:12,091 Now, a big crest's coming up. No idea. 651 00:33:12,158 --> 00:33:15,761 Gentle rolling hill or massive cliff? 652 00:33:15,827 --> 00:33:17,663 I don't know, Hammond! 653 00:33:17,729 --> 00:33:19,931 Hammond, seriously. 654 00:33:20,066 --> 00:33:21,833 Shit, he's gone. 655 00:33:21,900 --> 00:33:24,370 Hammond's gone, everyone. Hammond's gone. Big one. 656 00:33:26,072 --> 00:33:27,406 (SIGHS) 657 00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:30,076 Oh, (BLEEP) me. 658 00:33:36,815 --> 00:33:40,286 How the (BLEEP) did you get down that? 659 00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:44,090 With my eyes shut! 660 00:33:44,123 --> 00:33:46,492 (LAUGHS) That was terrifying! 661 00:33:46,558 --> 00:33:48,727 (LAUGHS) 662 00:33:48,794 --> 00:33:51,097 Jesus! 663 00:33:59,205 --> 00:34:01,140 JEREMY: As we continued to head east, 664 00:34:01,207 --> 00:34:03,509 the terrain eventually levelled out... 665 00:34:07,679 --> 00:34:11,750 which meant we swapped terror for extreme discomfort. 666 00:34:14,753 --> 00:34:17,789 Ah. Oh, God Almighty. 667 00:34:17,856 --> 00:34:20,792 I don't think these cars were actually designed 668 00:34:20,859 --> 00:34:23,495 to take this much punishment. 669 00:34:23,562 --> 00:34:26,132 - And I know we weren't. - (GROANS) 670 00:34:26,165 --> 00:34:27,833 The only thing is, 671 00:34:27,899 --> 00:34:31,603 James's car rides lower than this and will be worse. 672 00:34:31,670 --> 00:34:34,606 Argh! Ow! 673 00:34:34,673 --> 00:34:36,408 Ow! Ow! Ow! 674 00:34:38,144 --> 00:34:40,312 Agh! 675 00:34:40,379 --> 00:34:42,414 JEREMY: Soon, the relentless battering 676 00:34:42,481 --> 00:34:45,151 started to cause breakdowns. 677 00:34:45,184 --> 00:34:46,752 (ENGINE SPLUTTERS) 678 00:34:46,818 --> 00:34:49,921 Sand... Sand in gear shift. 679 00:34:49,988 --> 00:34:52,858 JEREMY: My throttle is jammed wide open, people. 680 00:34:55,161 --> 00:34:58,230 (ENGINE REVS AND WHINES) 681 00:35:03,435 --> 00:35:06,438 The problem is that every time the air filter, here, 682 00:35:06,505 --> 00:35:09,040 turns as I'm driving along-- which it does-- 683 00:35:09,175 --> 00:35:11,177 it's jamming the throttle. 684 00:35:12,178 --> 00:35:13,379 (SIGHS) 685 00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:16,182 What's going on here? 686 00:35:17,783 --> 00:35:19,084 What's up? 687 00:35:19,185 --> 00:35:21,086 The throttle is now jamming 688 00:35:21,187 --> 00:35:22,688 fully open all the time. 689 00:35:22,754 --> 00:35:24,656 Oh, problem. 690 00:35:40,372 --> 00:35:42,608 (TAPPING AND CLANGING) 691 00:35:42,674 --> 00:35:43,775 Oh, God. 692 00:35:45,211 --> 00:35:49,448 It is still moving. (GROANS) 693 00:35:49,515 --> 00:35:51,550 RICHARD: Many miles ahead, 694 00:35:51,617 --> 00:35:54,653 we'd pulled over for a break from the endless bumps, 695 00:35:54,720 --> 00:35:57,689 and James was being very interesting! 696 00:36:01,059 --> 00:36:04,062 The good thing about this hat is you can angle it, like a heliostat, 697 00:36:04,129 --> 00:36:05,431 to where the sun's coming from. 698 00:36:05,497 --> 00:36:07,032 Yes, that's true. 699 00:36:07,098 --> 00:36:09,735 But you still look a tit. 700 00:36:09,801 --> 00:36:12,904 Luckily for Hammond, who could do with the company, 701 00:36:12,971 --> 00:36:15,641 I was back on the move. 702 00:36:15,707 --> 00:36:19,978 Right, a new style of driving is now required. 703 00:36:20,045 --> 00:36:24,082 This arm for steering, this arm for changing gear, 704 00:36:24,149 --> 00:36:29,020 and then another arm for deaccelerating, like so. 705 00:36:29,087 --> 00:36:31,022 Yes! 706 00:36:31,089 --> 00:36:32,724 Accelerate. 707 00:36:32,791 --> 00:36:34,626 (ENGINE REVS) 708 00:36:34,693 --> 00:36:36,528 Deaccelerate. 709 00:36:36,595 --> 00:36:38,997 Sometimes, if you listen very carefully, 710 00:36:39,064 --> 00:36:40,832 you can hear my genius. 711 00:36:43,134 --> 00:36:45,070 JEREMY: Back as a threesome, we continued 712 00:36:45,136 --> 00:36:49,541 with our seemingly endless journey to the east. 713 00:36:49,608 --> 00:36:52,744 Just need to find a road now. This is not funny any more. 714 00:36:52,811 --> 00:36:55,347 Enough desert. 715 00:36:55,414 --> 00:36:57,449 I don't want another night in the desert. 716 00:36:58,817 --> 00:37:01,620 I smell pretty bad. 717 00:37:01,687 --> 00:37:03,389 And I suspect that if we manage 718 00:37:03,455 --> 00:37:06,325 to find somewhere tonight near civilisation, 719 00:37:06,392 --> 00:37:08,294 we should probably have a ceremonial 720 00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:11,196 bonfire of the underpants. 721 00:37:11,297 --> 00:37:12,664 JAMES: In truth, though, 722 00:37:12,731 --> 00:37:15,767 I thought we'd be in the desert forever. 723 00:37:15,834 --> 00:37:19,971 But then, late in the afternoon... 724 00:37:20,038 --> 00:37:25,577 I'm looking ahead, and I'm not seeing an endless sea of sand. 725 00:37:26,478 --> 00:37:28,414 I'm seeing green. 726 00:37:29,948 --> 00:37:32,718 Trees! Those are trees and shrubs! 727 00:37:37,623 --> 00:37:38,690 Pylons! 728 00:37:38,757 --> 00:37:41,327 Pylons! That means electricity. 729 00:37:45,631 --> 00:37:46,798 Oh, yes! 730 00:37:47,966 --> 00:37:49,501 Civilisation! 731 00:37:51,403 --> 00:37:54,005 JAMES: And then, best of all... 732 00:37:55,774 --> 00:37:56,942 Oh, my God. 733 00:38:05,116 --> 00:38:07,919 I honestly thought we had another night of sleeping... 734 00:38:07,986 --> 00:38:09,555 - (JAMES SIGHS) - ...in the sand. 735 00:38:09,621 --> 00:38:11,957 But, no! Look at it! 736 00:38:13,759 --> 00:38:15,761 Nicest thing I've ever seen. 737 00:38:19,365 --> 00:38:21,800 JEREMY: I could go east, I could go west... 738 00:38:21,867 --> 00:38:24,202 Whichever way you go, it goes somewhere. That's the point. 739 00:38:24,269 --> 00:38:26,037 It's a road, it goes somewhere. 740 00:38:26,104 --> 00:38:29,240 You know what we've just done, don't you? 741 00:38:29,375 --> 00:38:32,744 We've just crossed the Namib Desert in three beach buggies. 742 00:38:32,811 --> 00:38:34,145 - We have. - We did. 743 00:38:34,212 --> 00:38:36,014 We did. 744 00:38:36,081 --> 00:38:38,950 There is literally nothing can stop us now. 745 00:38:43,154 --> 00:38:44,756 JEREMY: Admittedly, 746 00:38:44,823 --> 00:38:48,059 our crossing had not exactly been as the crow flies, 747 00:38:48,126 --> 00:38:49,828 but we had found our road, 748 00:38:49,895 --> 00:38:52,063 and that's all that mattered. 749 00:38:53,164 --> 00:38:54,533 Oh, yes! 750 00:38:54,600 --> 00:38:56,668 That's the best thing I've ever seen! 751 00:38:56,735 --> 00:39:00,406 Yes, it is the road to freedom! 752 00:39:00,472 --> 00:39:02,841 - (HISSING) - What the hell was that? 753 00:39:05,310 --> 00:39:09,314 Something has just exploded at the back of my car. 754 00:39:09,415 --> 00:39:11,617 Oh, dear. 755 00:39:11,683 --> 00:39:14,052 By the time my colleagues had got back to me, 756 00:39:14,119 --> 00:39:16,922 I'd worked out what the problem was. 757 00:39:16,988 --> 00:39:19,157 It's really straightforward, OK? 758 00:39:19,224 --> 00:39:22,661 - The top bolt has come out of the shock absorber. - Right. 759 00:39:22,728 --> 00:39:26,264 It shot up, boinged into the coolant pipe, 760 00:39:26,331 --> 00:39:29,668 and three gallons of water have simply burst out, 761 00:39:29,735 --> 00:39:32,471 going everywhere except into the engine. 762 00:39:32,538 --> 00:39:36,274 - Right. - So all I've got to do is reattach the top bolt... 763 00:39:36,341 --> 00:39:40,846 mend the pipe and find three gallons of water... 764 00:39:40,912 --> 00:39:45,250 which I shall get from a passing motorist, and I'll be on my way. 765 00:39:45,316 --> 00:39:46,351 Right. 766 00:39:46,452 --> 00:39:47,586 All I could do with a hand with 767 00:39:47,653 --> 00:39:49,154 is just lifting the car up 768 00:39:49,220 --> 00:39:51,289 so I can reattach the, um... 769 00:39:51,356 --> 00:39:53,224 Yeah. Well, is there anybody here? 770 00:39:53,291 --> 00:39:55,894 - There's... - I suppose a motorist will pass eventually. 771 00:39:55,961 --> 00:39:58,630 The one that gives you water will also lift it up for you. 772 00:39:58,697 --> 00:40:00,466 You could just lift it up a little bit. 773 00:40:00,466 --> 00:40:02,400 Or we could go and have a beer. 774 00:40:02,400 --> 00:40:02,468 Or we could go and have a beer. - I hear traffic. - Yes. - We'd better not be here. 775 00:40:02,468 --> 00:40:04,335 - I hear traffic. - Yes. - We'd better not be here. 776 00:40:04,402 --> 00:40:06,438 We don't want to interfere when you're trying to talk 777 00:40:06,505 --> 00:40:08,006 'cause we might put them off. 778 00:40:08,073 --> 00:40:13,211 (ENGINES REV) 779 00:40:13,278 --> 00:40:14,613 Right. 780 00:40:25,524 --> 00:40:29,795 Somewhere along here there will be a place, 781 00:40:29,861 --> 00:40:32,964 and that place will have a bar in it 782 00:40:33,031 --> 00:40:34,566 that will contain beer. 783 00:40:39,237 --> 00:40:40,506 Do you have any water? 784 00:40:40,572 --> 00:40:41,940 - Huh? - Water. 785 00:40:42,007 --> 00:40:44,242 Because the radiator has blown, 786 00:40:44,309 --> 00:40:45,911 so I need just three gallons. 787 00:40:45,977 --> 00:40:49,214 Look, you've got some water there. Just a bucket. 788 00:40:52,751 --> 00:40:55,621 It's an actual water lorry... 789 00:40:55,687 --> 00:40:58,490 leaking water, and he won't give me any. 790 00:41:02,961 --> 00:41:05,230 Eventually, I flagged down a local 791 00:41:05,296 --> 00:41:07,533 who had water to spare. 792 00:41:07,533 --> 00:41:09,568 Thank you. 793 00:41:09,635 --> 00:41:12,003 And then I got on with the repairs. 794 00:41:12,070 --> 00:41:16,642 That is one reassembled shock absorber. 795 00:41:16,708 --> 00:41:18,143 That's reattached, 796 00:41:18,209 --> 00:41:20,879 so that's the cooling system back in one piece. 797 00:41:25,116 --> 00:41:28,754 JAMES: After an exhausting five-hour drive, 798 00:41:28,820 --> 00:41:31,322 Richard and I finally reached a town, 799 00:41:31,389 --> 00:41:35,761 which turned out to be Namibia's capital city: Windhoek, 800 00:41:35,827 --> 00:41:38,830 and we too were taking on liquids. 801 00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:56,715 Mm. 802 00:42:03,021 --> 00:42:03,989 (HISSING) 803 00:42:04,055 --> 00:42:06,424 Back out on the highway, though, 804 00:42:06,491 --> 00:42:09,194 things weren't so good. 805 00:42:09,260 --> 00:42:13,799 What I'm driving here - or attempting to drive - is Apollo 13. 806 00:42:13,865 --> 00:42:15,366 There's some air trapped in the system 807 00:42:15,433 --> 00:42:18,604 and I've had to make a small hole in the front 808 00:42:18,670 --> 00:42:20,205 to get at the radiator. 809 00:42:20,271 --> 00:42:21,607 Bled that, 810 00:42:21,607 --> 00:42:23,341 bled all the stuff going into the engine. 811 00:42:23,408 --> 00:42:24,509 This is the header pipe. 812 00:42:24,610 --> 00:42:26,311 Everything is bled, and yet, 813 00:42:26,377 --> 00:42:28,814 you do a mile, it overheats. 814 00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:30,616 Another mile, overheats. 815 00:42:42,060 --> 00:42:46,331 Well, we've covered... 20 miles in four hours. 816 00:42:52,638 --> 00:42:53,872 (SIGHS) 817 00:43:01,246 --> 00:43:06,384 This is the sixth time in 30 miles that's happened. 818 00:43:06,451 --> 00:43:09,387 Whilst my colleagues embraced beer and bed, 819 00:43:09,454 --> 00:43:13,124 I steeled myself for the longest, coldest, 820 00:43:13,191 --> 00:43:17,062 most frustrating night of my life. 821 00:43:17,128 --> 00:43:19,064 (HISSING) 822 00:43:22,668 --> 00:43:24,169 JEREMY: The roads are getting worse. 823 00:43:24,235 --> 00:43:26,672 Honestly, my bones are going to shatter. 824 00:43:26,705 --> 00:43:29,741 - (ENGINE REVS) - Oh, my God! 825 00:43:29,808 --> 00:43:31,109 (SCREAMS) 826 00:43:34,980 --> 00:43:38,784 - I've had a great idea. - Oh, no. 827 00:43:39,785 --> 00:43:41,820 Oh, shit, it's really high!