1
00:00:40,073 --> 00:00:43,308
I guess what I'm having a little
bit of trouble with here
2
00:00:43,310 --> 00:00:45,210
is how you could have done
something like this
3
00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:46,478
in the first place.
4
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:48,847
I mean, please,
help me understand
5
00:00:48,849 --> 00:00:51,683
what was going through
your minds at the time.
6
00:00:51,685 --> 00:00:53,886
We weren't paying attention.
7
00:00:53,888 --> 00:00:55,988
And I know I speak for us both
when I say that
8
00:00:55,990 --> 00:00:58,757
if I had it to do over again,
I would absolutely
9
00:00:58,759 --> 00:01:00,426
do things differently.
10
00:01:00,428 --> 00:01:02,394
I would be much more aware.
11
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:05,497
Because you got caught,
or because you feel ashamed?
12
00:01:05,499 --> 00:01:07,266
I feel ashamed.
13
00:01:07,268 --> 00:01:09,535
I'm ashamed of my behavior,
14
00:01:09,537 --> 00:01:11,170
and I am deeply,
deeply sorry.
15
00:01:11,172 --> 00:01:13,038
Yeah, we were all gonna go
to kylynn's after work,
16
00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:14,339
if you want to come.
17
00:01:14,341 --> 00:01:15,908
Me, too.
18
00:01:15,910 --> 00:01:18,944
I mean, you can invite her,
if you want.
19
00:01:18,946 --> 00:01:20,712
I'm just kind of
over her right now.
20
00:01:21,949 --> 00:01:23,849
Well, she's just been
kind of like
21
00:01:23,851 --> 00:01:26,118
a really bad friend to all
our other friends, you know?
22
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:28,087
I mean, she got 15 downvotes
last week,
23
00:01:28,089 --> 00:01:29,922
so that tells you something.
24
00:01:29,924 --> 00:01:32,858
That's about all the time
we have for Lewis and tom,
25
00:01:32,860 --> 00:01:35,227
so, please, don't forget
to cast your votes now.
26
00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:38,197
You have the breakfast show on?
27
00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:40,132
Yeah, but I missed the first
part... what did they do?
28
00:01:40,134 --> 00:01:42,401
- ...or Sincere.
- Mm.
29
00:01:42,403 --> 00:01:44,369
That one guy has
really weird eyes.
30
00:01:44,371 --> 00:01:48,607
Mm, I don't know,
he just seems kind of shady.
31
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:52,377
Yeah, I was gonna wear
the blue one,
32
00:01:52,379 --> 00:01:54,213
but then I totally forgot
I let jessala borrow it,
33
00:01:54,215 --> 00:01:56,381
and now she's out of town.
34
00:01:57,718 --> 00:01:59,985
I know, right? Bitch.
35
00:01:59,987 --> 00:02:03,322
She is so getting a downvote
when she gets back.
36
00:02:34,621 --> 00:02:37,089
Hey! Hey!
37
00:02:54,474 --> 00:02:57,176
Final vote has begun.
38
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:30,135
Man, it does look
a lot like earth.
39
00:04:30,137 --> 00:04:31,803
In more ways than one.
40
00:04:31,805 --> 00:04:34,106
With all the different planets
in the galaxy,
41
00:04:34,108 --> 00:04:36,908
you're bound to have a few cases
of parallel species development.
42
00:04:36,910 --> 00:04:39,611
Sargas four is an acute example
of this phenomenon.
43
00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:43,582
Union cultural anthropologists
believe it bears
44
00:04:43,584 --> 00:04:46,251
remarkable similarities
to your 21st century earth.
45
00:04:46,253 --> 00:04:48,120
So, like, I could go down there
46
00:04:48,122 --> 00:04:49,821
and get, like, a manwich?
47
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:51,890
Nobody's going down there
except the landing team.
48
00:04:51,892 --> 00:04:54,126
How long have the researchers
been unaccounted for?
49
00:04:54,128 --> 00:04:55,961
Over a month.
50
00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:57,629
Their last report indicated
they'd had
51
00:04:57,631 --> 00:04:59,965
some success integrating
into the culture.
52
00:04:59,967 --> 00:05:02,267
They even sent back some really
interesting images.
53
00:05:02,269 --> 00:05:04,269
And then, suddenly, nothing.
54
00:05:04,271 --> 00:05:05,771
Radio silence.
55
00:05:05,773 --> 00:05:07,472
Could just be equipment
malfunction.
56
00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:10,275
- Communications failure.
- Maybe.
57
00:05:10,277 --> 00:05:12,010
I'm gonna go check
on the landing team.
58
00:05:12,012 --> 00:05:14,146
- Bortus, you have the conn.
- Aye, sir.
59
00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:24,122
This is ridiculous, man.
60
00:05:24,124 --> 00:05:26,525
How the hell is anybody supposed
to walk around in these things?
61
00:05:26,527 --> 00:05:29,027
I don't know, John, I think you
look good in skinny jeans.
62
00:05:29,029 --> 00:05:30,295
If I wanted to scratch
my balls right now,
63
00:05:30,297 --> 00:05:31,863
I would have to reach
in my back pocket.
64
00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:33,432
Yeah, well, at least
your pants are whole.
65
00:05:33,434 --> 00:05:35,967
Commander, I look ridiculous.
66
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:37,302
You want to go down there
with that forehead?
67
00:05:37,304 --> 00:05:39,137
Well, no, but...
68
00:05:39,139 --> 00:05:41,106
Okay, let's see what else
is in the file.
69
00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:44,976
We don't have a lot of specific
information on this society.
70
00:05:44,978 --> 00:05:47,946
Traditional sargas four
headwear, various styles.
71
00:05:48,948 --> 00:05:50,882
Here.
72
00:05:50,884 --> 00:05:53,852
There you go.
That's better.
73
00:05:56,055 --> 00:05:59,024
John, what do you think?
74
00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:00,859
I dig it.
I like the whole thing.
75
00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:02,794
If Andy got a look at you
right now,
76
00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:04,062
he'd be kickin' himself
for dumpin' you.
77
00:06:04,064 --> 00:06:06,431
I dumped him, let's be clear
about that.
78
00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:11,970
My god, you guys look like
unemployed backup dancers.
79
00:06:11,972 --> 00:06:13,505
You want to lead this
landing party?
80
00:06:13,507 --> 00:06:15,841
No, I'm too shy
to wear a crop top.
81
00:06:15,843 --> 00:06:17,008
Don't forget this.
82
00:06:17,010 --> 00:06:19,144
Sargas four
is a capitalist culture.
83
00:06:19,146 --> 00:06:20,645
What is it?
84
00:06:20,647 --> 00:06:22,814
- It's money.
- What do you do with it?
85
00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:24,750
You give it to people,
and they give you stuff,
86
00:06:24,752 --> 00:06:27,152
- or they do stuff.
- That's weird.
87
00:06:27,154 --> 00:06:28,920
There's gonna be a lot of weird
surprises down there,
88
00:06:28,922 --> 00:06:30,355
so everyone's gonna have
to stay alert.
89
00:06:30,357 --> 00:06:34,059
Claire... I'm sure Lewis
is fine.
90
00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:36,661
It's probably just faulty
communications.
91
00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:38,764
I appreciate that, captain.
92
00:06:38,766 --> 00:06:41,099
Lewis and I worked together
a long time ago,
93
00:06:41,101 --> 00:06:44,836
but I always remember him being
very resourceful.
94
00:06:44,838 --> 00:06:45,937
I know he's okay.
95
00:06:45,939 --> 00:06:47,939
All right.
96
00:06:47,941 --> 00:06:49,908
Now, remember, you go in,
97
00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:51,910
you locate the anthropologists,
you bring 'em back.
98
00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:54,012
You leave as tiny a footprint
as you can on that society.
99
00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:55,747
No interference.
100
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:58,183
If, god forbid, something's
happened to our people,
101
00:06:58,185 --> 00:07:01,853
you get out of there fast, you
report back here. Understood?
102
00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:03,789
- Okay.
- All right, good luck.
103
00:07:05,091 --> 00:07:07,025
Oh, and, alara,
104
00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:08,794
do something about
that nose, will you?
105
00:07:08,796 --> 00:07:12,030
Aye, sir.
106
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,484
Why are you sitting like that?
107
00:07:32,486 --> 00:07:34,386
It's these friggin' jeans.
108
00:07:34,388 --> 00:07:37,088
If I leaned back right now,
I'd give myself a vasectomy.
109
00:07:37,090 --> 00:07:38,990
Engage cloak.
110
00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:40,325
Engaging cloak.
111
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,920
Hey, jerris.
Good to see you back.
112
00:08:08,922 --> 00:08:10,522
Oh, thanks, man.
113
00:08:10,524 --> 00:08:12,591
I think that was probably
the worst flu I ever had.
114
00:08:12,593 --> 00:08:15,160
Well, hey, looks like
you lost a few pounds.
115
00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:17,696
You know, I'll take it.
116
00:08:17,698 --> 00:08:19,464
Oh, look at that.
117
00:08:19,466 --> 00:08:21,132
How nice is your grandma, huh?
118
00:08:21,134 --> 00:08:22,167
How much does she love you?
119
00:08:22,169 --> 00:08:23,935
Thank you, grandma.
120
00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:26,805
Oh, you are so welcome,
dear one.
121
00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:28,707
What do you give to grandma?
122
00:08:28,709 --> 00:08:30,942
- Thank you, honey.
- Aw, good girl.
123
00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:32,244
That's it.
124
00:08:34,146 --> 00:08:36,615
- Oh!
- Watch it, dude!
125
00:08:36,617 --> 00:08:39,084
I'm really sorry.
I wasn't looking.
126
00:08:48,227 --> 00:08:50,061
Look at this place.
127
00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:53,698
My god, it's incredible how
similar it is to old earth.
128
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:55,500
Yeah, maybe there's
a "bustin jieber"
129
00:08:55,502 --> 00:08:57,068
walkin' around somewhere.
130
00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:58,370
Grayson to Orville.
131
00:08:58,372 --> 00:08:59,504
Orville here.
132
00:08:59,506 --> 00:09:01,573
- You reading me?
- Loud and clear.
133
00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:04,042
Good. We'll stay on this
frequency and contact you
134
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,044
when we have an update.
Grayson out.
135
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:07,245
All right, here you go.
136
00:09:07,247 --> 00:09:09,214
Have a good day.
137
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:12,350
- Hi. Yeah, hi.
- Can I help you?
138
00:09:12,352 --> 00:09:14,753
We were wondering,
if by any chance, you've seen
139
00:09:14,755 --> 00:09:16,755
either of these two men.
140
00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:17,822
What's this, a joke?
141
00:09:17,824 --> 00:09:19,591
No, it's not.
142
00:09:19,593 --> 00:09:20,592
Do you know them?
143
00:09:20,594 --> 00:09:22,661
Yeah, I know who they are.
144
00:09:22,663 --> 00:09:24,229
Do you know where
we can find them?
145
00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:26,998
Well, they used to hang out
at the cafe up the street.
146
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,100
Hey, where are your badges?
147
00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:32,337
We're not police officers,
if that's what you're asking.
148
00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:34,005
Well, you sure as hell
are gonna get arrested
149
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:35,106
without your badges.
150
00:09:35,108 --> 00:09:37,609
Mine broke,
so I figured I'd wait
151
00:09:37,611 --> 00:09:38,944
for the new version to come out.
152
00:09:38,946 --> 00:09:40,545
Actually, we lost them.
153
00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:42,414
I can sell you a set of four,
154
00:09:42,416 --> 00:09:44,849
all pre-loaded
with 200,000 upvotes.
155
00:09:44,851 --> 00:09:47,552
That's... that's great, thanks.
156
00:09:47,554 --> 00:09:49,387
They're all odd numbers, with
a couple of downvotes included,
157
00:09:49,389 --> 00:09:51,456
so it doesn't seem fake.
158
00:09:53,559 --> 00:09:55,760
40 lods.
159
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:58,129
- I'm sorry?
- Come on!
160
00:09:58,131 --> 00:10:01,933
- The money.
- Oh. Oh, right. Sorry.
161
00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:05,036
Um...
162
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:06,905
- Now, about the two men.
- Go on,
163
00:10:06,907 --> 00:10:08,940
get the hell outta here...
You want to get me busted?
164
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:11,710
Come on, let's go check out
the cafe.
165
00:10:13,412 --> 00:10:15,146
What are these things?
166
00:10:15,148 --> 00:10:16,815
I don't know,
but everybody's wearing 'em.
167
00:10:16,817 --> 00:10:17,816
Look around you.
168
00:10:17,818 --> 00:10:19,117
Hey, alara,
169
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:21,052
maybe you can find
a guy here, huh?
170
00:10:21,054 --> 00:10:23,655
Brand-new planet, nobody knows
your dating history.
171
00:10:23,657 --> 00:10:25,156
What the hell does that mean?
172
00:10:25,158 --> 00:10:26,825
Nothin'. It's just that
you've gone through
173
00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:28,460
two guys in two months.
174
00:10:28,462 --> 00:10:30,795
Well, I told you, it's just
really hard to find a guy
175
00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,931
who doesn't get insecure
about my abilities.
176
00:10:32,933 --> 00:10:35,400
Is that the only reason
you dumped Andy?
177
00:10:35,402 --> 00:10:38,970
Mostly, but also...
178
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:40,105
He danced weird.
179
00:10:40,107 --> 00:10:41,806
- What?
- Weird how?
180
00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:43,008
Too grindy.
181
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:44,175
A little grindy can be good.
182
00:10:44,177 --> 00:10:46,111
Yeah, but this was
really grindy.
183
00:10:46,113 --> 00:10:48,513
Wait, what's-what's too grindy?
184
00:10:48,515 --> 00:10:50,615
Right, like,
is-is this too grindy?
185
00:10:50,617 --> 00:10:51,783
What the hell are you doing?
186
00:10:51,785 --> 00:10:52,917
Is this too grindy
187
00:10:52,919 --> 00:10:54,519
or not grindy enough?
188
00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:56,521
- Lieutenant, stop it.
- This is it, right?
189
00:10:56,523 --> 00:10:57,922
Huh?
This is that goldilocks grind.
190
00:10:57,924 --> 00:11:00,792
Where the grind is just right.
191
00:11:00,794 --> 00:11:02,494
Lieutenant, knock it off
right now. That's an order.
192
00:11:02,496 --> 00:11:04,963
All right, all right.
I was just trying to help out.
193
00:11:04,965 --> 00:11:07,098
What part of inconspicuous
don't you understand?
194
00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:10,502
There's the cafe, come on.
195
00:11:10,504 --> 00:11:13,938
And there's great concern about
the level of contamination
196
00:11:13,940 --> 00:11:15,507
due to industrial waste
in the south madaka reservoir.
197
00:11:15,509 --> 00:11:17,942
But you can't deny facts.
74% of the population
198
00:11:17,944 --> 00:11:20,345
has voted that assessment false.
199
00:11:20,347 --> 00:11:21,946
I mean, facts are facts.
200
00:11:21,948 --> 00:11:24,015
Have a nice day.
201
00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:26,284
Hi, I'd just like a cup of tea,
please.
202
00:11:29,221 --> 00:11:30,789
Read the sign.
203
00:11:35,961 --> 00:11:37,629
Please,
all I want is a cup of tea.
204
00:11:37,631 --> 00:11:39,230
I've been to a dozen cafes
all over town...
205
00:11:39,232 --> 00:11:41,833
No exceptions.
206
00:11:41,835 --> 00:11:43,968
Most of these are from
my 20s.
207
00:11:43,970 --> 00:11:46,071
I'm a completely
different person, and...
208
00:11:46,073 --> 00:11:47,505
Look, if you don't
get out of here right now,
209
00:11:47,507 --> 00:11:48,973
I'm going to call the police.
210
00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:55,847
- Hi. Can I help you?
- I hope so.
211
00:11:55,849 --> 00:11:58,249
We're looking for two men
who've been seen here.
212
00:11:58,251 --> 00:12:00,485
Hi. I'm lysella.
213
00:12:00,487 --> 00:12:02,020
Hey, I'm John.
214
00:12:02,022 --> 00:12:03,488
How's it going?
215
00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:11,062
Oh, god, that was too forward,
wasn't it?
216
00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:12,397
Was that too forward?
217
00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:13,732
Nah. No.
218
00:12:13,734 --> 00:12:14,999
I was just saying
219
00:12:15,001 --> 00:12:16,735
I wish somebody
would poke me today.
220
00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:20,238
What happened to your nose?
221
00:12:21,507 --> 00:12:23,408
It's a deviated septum.
222
00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:25,944
She's a coke addict.
223
00:12:25,946 --> 00:12:28,012
Ma'am, have you seen either
of these two men?
224
00:12:28,014 --> 00:12:29,748
You're kidding me, right?
225
00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:31,015
Everybody knows these guys.
226
00:12:31,017 --> 00:12:32,584
Why does everyone know them?
227
00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:35,553
They got corrected,
like a month ago.
228
00:12:35,555 --> 00:12:37,555
What do you mean by corrected?
229
00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:39,023
Breaking news...
230
00:12:39,025 --> 00:12:41,359
- Oh, my god.
- John, your badge.
231
00:12:44,864 --> 00:12:47,031
Oh, my god, what did you do?
232
00:12:47,033 --> 00:12:48,800
- Commander, look.
- Again,
233
00:12:48,802 --> 00:12:50,435
what you are seeing here
is a man
234
00:12:50,437 --> 00:12:51,870
performing what appears to be
235
00:12:51,872 --> 00:12:54,372
a lewd act on a statue
of mella giffenden.
236
00:12:54,374 --> 00:12:57,742
This was recorded just a few
minutes ago and uploaded.
237
00:12:57,744 --> 00:12:59,277
The feed is understandably
238
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:00,945
not happy about it,
239
00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:02,147
and voting has already begun.
240
00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:04,249
The badge code has been
identified,
241
00:13:04,251 --> 00:13:06,918
so get out those mobile devices
and cast your vote now.
242
00:13:06,920 --> 00:13:09,220
Oh, my god,
you're already above 500,000.
243
00:13:09,222 --> 00:13:10,622
You need to
get out of here, now.
244
00:13:10,624 --> 00:13:12,924
- Wait, what does that mean?
- Get out of here. Now! Go!
245
00:13:12,926 --> 00:13:13,892
Come on, let's go.
246
00:13:17,096 --> 00:13:18,429
Hey!
247
00:13:18,431 --> 00:13:20,131
Hey, that's the guy!
248
00:13:28,007 --> 00:13:30,141
- What's going on here?
- I...
249
00:13:30,943 --> 00:13:32,443
Grayson to Orville.
250
00:13:32,445 --> 00:13:34,179
- Mercer here, go ahead.
- Captain, there's something
251
00:13:34,181 --> 00:13:35,814
going on down here.
Some kind of social hysteria
252
00:13:35,816 --> 00:13:37,949
surrounding lieutenant lamarr.
253
00:13:37,951 --> 00:13:39,684
Show some respect
for your country, jerk.
254
00:13:39,686 --> 00:13:41,152
Hey, chill out.
255
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,621
Kelly, what's happening?
256
00:13:43,623 --> 00:13:45,123
John dry-humped a statue.
257
00:13:45,125 --> 00:13:46,124
What?
258
00:13:46,126 --> 00:13:48,059
Get out of the way!
259
00:13:52,464 --> 00:13:53,965
We got to get out of here now.
260
00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:55,433
I'll contact you
from the shuttle.
261
00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:56,601
Grayson out.
262
00:13:56,603 --> 00:13:57,669
Get out of the way.
263
00:13:57,671 --> 00:13:59,204
We got to move, guys. Come on.
264
00:13:59,206 --> 00:14:00,305
- Come on, let's move.
- Get out of the way.
265
00:14:00,307 --> 00:14:01,539
Move.
266
00:14:01,541 --> 00:14:02,874
Come on, we gotta move.
267
00:14:02,876 --> 00:14:04,042
Hold it right there!
268
00:14:06,478 --> 00:14:08,179
You're under arrest.
269
00:14:22,895 --> 00:14:25,964
Exactly what did your navigator
do down there?
270
00:14:25,966 --> 00:14:30,068
I'm told he dry-humped a statue.
271
00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:31,970
Oh, my god.
272
00:14:31,972 --> 00:14:33,905
What kind of ship are you
running out there, captain?
273
00:14:33,907 --> 00:14:36,341
Look, admiral,
he's an impulsive guy, yes,
274
00:14:36,343 --> 00:14:37,976
but he's fantastic at his job.
275
00:14:37,978 --> 00:14:40,712
Part of his job
is to maintain a low profile
276
00:14:40,714 --> 00:14:43,248
when observing lesser-developed
alien cultures.
277
00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:45,984
I-I know that, and I promise
it will not happen again.
278
00:14:45,986 --> 00:14:48,987
I will personally order him..
279
00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:51,522
Not to hump things,
but in the meantime,
280
00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:53,324
request clearance
to extract him.
281
00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:55,159
Absolutely not.
282
00:14:55,161 --> 00:14:56,995
Look, sir,
just hear me out on this, okay?
283
00:14:56,997 --> 00:15:00,265
Let's say we reveal ourselves.
284
00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:02,867
We go in there,
we tell them what happened.
285
00:15:02,869 --> 00:15:05,436
This is a culture at the 21st
century level of development.
286
00:15:05,438 --> 00:15:07,005
Knowledge
of extraterrestrial life
287
00:15:07,007 --> 00:15:10,375
could unify them
in a profound way.
288
00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:12,610
Or it could plunge them
into a panic,
289
00:15:12,612 --> 00:15:14,212
or some worse degree
of upheaval.
290
00:15:14,214 --> 00:15:16,547
I'm sorry, captain.
291
00:15:16,549 --> 00:15:18,049
Your man screwed up.
292
00:15:18,051 --> 00:15:20,885
He's going to have to play
by their rules.
293
00:15:20,887 --> 00:15:23,154
Tucker out.
294
00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:34,065
Sorry to keep you waiting, John.
295
00:15:34,067 --> 00:15:35,199
Is it "John"?
296
00:15:35,201 --> 00:15:37,035
Yeah. That's-that's right.
297
00:15:37,037 --> 00:15:37,969
That's an unusual name.
298
00:15:37,971 --> 00:15:39,137
Is it kelvic?
299
00:15:39,139 --> 00:15:40,972
Yeah. Sure.
300
00:15:40,974 --> 00:15:42,941
Well...
301
00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:44,976
John...
302
00:15:44,978 --> 00:15:48,212
You've gotten yourself in a bit
of a situation, haven't you?
303
00:15:48,214 --> 00:15:49,414
I don't know. You tell me.
304
00:15:49,416 --> 00:15:51,049
Last time I checked,
305
00:15:51,051 --> 00:15:52,951
you only arrest someone
if they've committed a crime.
306
00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:57,322
Uh-huh. And what would you call
a million downvotes?
307
00:15:57,324 --> 00:15:59,958
Look man, I just danced
with a statue, that's all.
308
00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:01,292
Why don't you start
by telling me
309
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,094
your version of what happened,
310
00:16:03,096 --> 00:16:05,330
- from the beginning. -If I told
it from the beginning,
311
00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:06,931
you'd crap your pants
and pass out.
312
00:16:08,435 --> 00:16:10,068
Trust me, I've heard it all.
313
00:16:10,070 --> 00:16:12,270
There's nothing you can say
that will shock me.
314
00:16:12,272 --> 00:16:14,105
Want to bet?
315
00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:17,108
Look, I'm just here to help you.
316
00:16:17,110 --> 00:16:19,077
Are you supposed to be
my lawyer or something?
317
00:16:19,079 --> 00:16:21,579
- Your what?
- My lawyer.
318
00:16:21,581 --> 00:16:23,915
I'm not familiar with that term.
319
00:16:23,917 --> 00:16:25,917
You know, with everything
I've seen today,
320
00:16:25,919 --> 00:16:27,819
I'm not the least bit surprised.
321
00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:29,487
I'm your publicity officer.
322
00:16:29,489 --> 00:16:31,923
I'm here to help guide you
through your apology tour.
323
00:16:31,925 --> 00:16:34,425
Okay, wait. Now I'm really lost.
324
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:35,994
What the hell is that?
325
00:16:35,996 --> 00:16:39,964
You-you don't know
what an apology tour is?
326
00:16:39,966 --> 00:16:42,100
John, they happen every day.
327
00:16:42,102 --> 00:16:43,534
How can you not be aware of...
328
00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:45,703
Let's say I'm not aware, okay?
329
00:16:45,705 --> 00:16:47,205
Let's say, right,
330
00:16:47,207 --> 00:16:49,507
I'm the dumbest
son of a bitch you've ever met.
331
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:51,342
Now with that in mind,
332
00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:54,645
why don't you explain
my situation to me?
333
00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:56,681
Okay.
334
00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:59,317
You performed
a disrespectful act
335
00:16:59,319 --> 00:17:03,154
on a statue commemorating
frontier hero mella giffenden.
336
00:17:03,156 --> 00:17:06,891
It was caught on video and
uploaded to the master feed.
337
00:17:06,893 --> 00:17:09,560
You received over one million
downvotes from the public,
338
00:17:09,562 --> 00:17:12,964
which makes what you did
a crime against the state.
339
00:17:12,966 --> 00:17:14,832
You will now begin
an apology tour,
340
00:17:14,834 --> 00:17:17,135
during which the people
will vote on whether or not
341
00:17:17,137 --> 00:17:18,903
they believe your sincerity.
342
00:17:18,905 --> 00:17:21,005
If your downvotes remain
under ten million,
343
00:17:21,007 --> 00:17:24,008
you'll be free to go.
344
00:17:25,912 --> 00:17:27,011
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
345
00:17:27,013 --> 00:17:29,047
Wait. I'm sorry...
346
00:17:32,584 --> 00:17:34,419
All that crap you just said,
347
00:17:34,421 --> 00:17:36,054
that-that's real?
348
00:17:36,056 --> 00:17:37,588
Aw, you got to be kidding me.
349
00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:39,590
That's how
the justice system works.
350
00:17:39,592 --> 00:17:41,926
Which I think you know.
351
00:17:41,928 --> 00:17:43,761
Okay, wait, so...
352
00:17:43,763 --> 00:17:46,364
Uh, what happens
if they don't believe me?
353
00:17:46,366 --> 00:17:47,832
You will undergo
social correction
354
00:17:47,834 --> 00:17:49,767
to prevent future
transgressions.
355
00:17:49,769 --> 00:17:52,203
What's that,
social correction?
356
00:17:52,205 --> 00:17:53,905
You will receive
357
00:17:53,907 --> 00:17:56,407
a series of neurological
treatments
358
00:17:56,409 --> 00:18:00,278
to pacify any and all
potentially negative impulses.
359
00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:04,282
Okay, now I ain't laughing.
360
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:11,389
Mercer to Grayson.
361
00:18:11,391 --> 00:18:12,690
What's the latest?
362
00:18:13,725 --> 00:18:15,193
No change, captain.
363
00:18:15,195 --> 00:18:16,461
We're waiting for them
to bring him out.
364
00:18:16,463 --> 00:18:17,795
I still want to know
how the hell
365
00:18:17,797 --> 00:18:19,464
a member of my crew
let this happen.
366
00:18:19,466 --> 00:18:20,731
It was my fault.
367
00:18:20,733 --> 00:18:22,200
I take full responsibility.
368
00:18:22,202 --> 00:18:24,102
Do you have any idea
how bad this is?
369
00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:26,037
Ed, I'll fix it. I promise.
370
00:18:26,039 --> 00:18:27,438
No surprise,
371
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:29,474
the admiral denied us clearance
to extract him.
372
00:18:29,476 --> 00:18:31,075
So, what are we up against?
373
00:18:31,077 --> 00:18:33,077
This whole society
seems to operate
374
00:18:33,079 --> 00:18:35,279
on some kind of points system.
375
00:18:35,281 --> 00:18:37,148
I mean, these badges
everyone wears,
376
00:18:37,150 --> 00:18:38,816
the feed on every wall,
377
00:18:38,818 --> 00:18:40,485
- John's arrest...
- Okay. Your guy's here.
378
00:18:40,487 --> 00:18:42,053
You got five minutes.
379
00:18:42,055 --> 00:18:43,421
Okay, they just brought him out.
I got to go.
380
00:18:43,423 --> 00:18:46,357
I'll contact you when I can.
Grayson out.
381
00:18:49,128 --> 00:18:51,162
Lieutenant, are you okay?
382
00:18:51,164 --> 00:18:53,998
Yeah, I'm all right.
But, commander, t-this is crazy.
383
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:56,100
They want me to do
some kind of apology tour
384
00:18:56,102 --> 00:18:58,169
that's supposed to decide
if I'm guilty or not.
385
00:18:58,171 --> 00:18:59,437
Well, that fits right in
with everything else
386
00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:01,472
about this place.
387
00:19:01,474 --> 00:19:02,940
I don't suppose the Orville
could send down an armed party
388
00:19:02,942 --> 00:19:04,775
and we just blast
our way out of here.
389
00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:07,145
The captain couldn't get
clearance from the union.
390
00:19:07,147 --> 00:19:10,948
We're gonna have to work
within the laws of this society.
391
00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:12,483
Is the captain mad?
392
00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:14,752
Well, he's more mad at me.
393
00:19:14,754 --> 00:19:16,020
Good.
394
00:19:17,256 --> 00:19:18,923
Listen, uh,
they said I could take
395
00:19:18,925 --> 00:19:20,158
one person with me on the tour.
396
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:21,959
I'd like it to be you.
397
00:19:21,961 --> 00:19:24,462
Of course. I'll do
everything I can to help.
398
00:19:24,464 --> 00:19:26,464
We're gonna get you
out of this, don't worry.
399
00:19:26,466 --> 00:19:28,099
John.
400
00:19:28,101 --> 00:19:29,800
Did they tell you
what happens if you lose?
401
00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:31,302
It doesn't sound good.
402
00:19:31,304 --> 00:19:33,538
They put you through
some kind of brain fry
403
00:19:33,540 --> 00:19:35,506
that's supposed to get rid
of all the bad stuff.
404
00:19:35,508 --> 00:19:38,776
This is a 21st century level
society.
405
00:19:38,778 --> 00:19:40,144
They don't have
the medical sophistication
406
00:19:40,146 --> 00:19:41,812
to do that safely.
407
00:19:41,814 --> 00:19:44,615
Commander, he could end up
a mental vegetable.
408
00:19:47,819 --> 00:19:50,555
- Hey, I'm a spaceman! You got
to let me out of here! -Shh!
409
00:19:50,557 --> 00:19:53,291
- I'm a spaceman! Hey! -Don't
make this worse for yourself.
410
00:19:53,293 --> 00:19:56,127
Come on.
411
00:19:56,129 --> 00:19:59,063
Okay, let's say...
412
00:19:59,065 --> 00:20:00,898
Let's say he loses.
413
00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:03,534
Would you be able to reverse
any damage to his brain?
414
00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:05,236
I don't know.
415
00:20:05,238 --> 00:20:08,039
I'd have to examine someone
who's had the procedure.
416
00:20:08,041 --> 00:20:09,240
The question is, who?
417
00:20:09,242 --> 00:20:11,175
The missing anthropologists.
418
00:20:11,177 --> 00:20:13,911
Remember the girl from the cafe
said that they'd been corrected.
419
00:20:13,913 --> 00:20:15,980
- They must've done something.
- That makes sense.
420
00:20:15,982 --> 00:20:19,050
Everyone we talked to
seemed to recognize them.
421
00:20:19,052 --> 00:20:20,718
What in the hell
could they have done?
422
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:23,254
Lewis isn't exactly the type
to hump a statue.
423
00:20:23,256 --> 00:20:25,156
We've got to locate those men.
424
00:20:26,558 --> 00:20:28,593
I'm sorry, John,
I got to pull you away.
425
00:20:28,595 --> 00:20:30,928
The chat needs you on set
in 20 minutes.
426
00:20:30,930 --> 00:20:31,929
The chat?
427
00:20:31,931 --> 00:20:34,098
Yep. Put your game face on.
428
00:20:34,100 --> 00:20:36,434
Here we go.
429
00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:51,249
Now remember,
humility is the key.
430
00:20:51,251 --> 00:20:52,917
You're extremely ashamed
of your lack of judgment,
431
00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:55,052
and you're prepared
to accept society's verdict
432
00:20:55,054 --> 00:20:56,954
with wholehearted respect.
433
00:20:56,956 --> 00:20:58,723
And don't forget
to mention the donation.
434
00:20:58,725 --> 00:20:59,924
I got it, all right?
435
00:20:59,926 --> 00:21:01,225
Believe me, I'm gonna just
436
00:21:01,227 --> 00:21:02,893
go out there and kiss ass.
437
00:21:02,895 --> 00:21:04,061
Yeah, but not too much.
438
00:21:04,063 --> 00:21:05,463
If they think you're pandering,
439
00:21:05,465 --> 00:21:06,897
they'll smell it.
440
00:21:06,899 --> 00:21:08,766
Just be yourself, but be humble.
441
00:21:17,075 --> 00:21:19,910
Okay, welcome back to the chat.
442
00:21:19,912 --> 00:21:21,946
It is voting time,
and today we've got one
443
00:21:21,948 --> 00:21:23,648
I'm sure you're all aware of.
444
00:21:23,650 --> 00:21:27,084
Have you guys seen this video
of the guy with the statue?
445
00:21:27,086 --> 00:21:28,786
It's pretty disgraceful.
446
00:21:28,788 --> 00:21:31,055
This man was caught on video
447
00:21:31,057 --> 00:21:32,390
simulating a sexual act
448
00:21:32,392 --> 00:21:34,825
with a statue
of mella giffenden,
449
00:21:34,827 --> 00:21:37,061
and it has justifiably
angered a lot of people.
450
00:21:37,063 --> 00:21:38,329
We have the video here.
451
00:21:38,331 --> 00:21:39,797
Let's take a look.
452
00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:42,400
Is it too grindy
or not grindy enough?
453
00:21:42,402 --> 00:21:44,168
Ugh.
454
00:21:46,239 --> 00:21:48,639
And that's not even how I do
sex. I was-i was just dancing.
455
00:21:48,641 --> 00:21:50,074
Um... humility.
456
00:21:50,076 --> 00:21:51,242
Oh, wow,
457
00:21:51,244 --> 00:21:53,144
that is just horrible.
458
00:21:53,146 --> 00:21:54,979
Totally agree.
Look at the master feed.
459
00:21:54,981 --> 00:21:57,014
Everybody's talking about it.
460
00:21:57,016 --> 00:21:59,617
"He has no respect for
his nation," says one person.
461
00:21:59,619 --> 00:22:02,253
"We don't need people like that
in our society," says another.
462
00:22:02,255 --> 00:22:03,921
"Correct him now."
463
00:22:03,923 --> 00:22:05,489
Obviously, people are
464
00:22:05,491 --> 00:22:08,526
very passionate about this,
so let's bring him out.
465
00:22:08,528 --> 00:22:10,695
Ladies and gentlemen,
John lamarr.
466
00:22:10,697 --> 00:22:12,496
Okay, go.
467
00:22:23,208 --> 00:22:25,042
- I just had to do that.
- Good girl.
468
00:22:25,044 --> 00:22:27,712
Okay, so let's
get straight to it,
469
00:22:27,714 --> 00:22:29,313
because everybody wants to know
470
00:22:29,315 --> 00:22:31,315
why would you do something
so blatantly
471
00:22:31,317 --> 00:22:34,652
demeaning to the image
of someone who is
472
00:22:34,654 --> 00:22:36,887
so universally respected
by our country?
473
00:22:36,889 --> 00:22:39,724
Well, I deeply regret
my actions,
474
00:22:39,726 --> 00:22:42,727
and I'm very, very sorry
and it will not happen again.
475
00:22:42,729 --> 00:22:44,061
Peace.
476
00:22:44,063 --> 00:22:45,629
I don't know.
477
00:22:45,631 --> 00:22:47,031
Does he sound sorry?
478
00:22:47,033 --> 00:22:48,299
- I don't think so.
- No, I-i am.
479
00:22:48,301 --> 00:22:49,967
I-I really am.
480
00:22:49,969 --> 00:22:51,535
I had a momentary lapse
in judgment,
481
00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:53,738
and I'm aware
that I caused offense
482
00:22:53,740 --> 00:22:56,040
to a great many people
and I sincerely apologize.
483
00:22:57,310 --> 00:22:58,976
I'm not even that kind of guy.
484
00:22:58,978 --> 00:23:00,978
Grayson to Orville.
Are you watching?
485
00:23:00,980 --> 00:23:02,213
We're seeing it.
486
00:23:02,215 --> 00:23:03,514
I like soda.
487
00:23:03,516 --> 00:23:05,015
I'm a good driver.
488
00:23:05,017 --> 00:23:07,852
Who would need such a large cup?
489
00:23:07,854 --> 00:23:10,020
Kelly, what the hell
kind of circus is this?
490
00:23:10,022 --> 00:23:12,323
You're telling me
this is their legal process?
491
00:23:12,325 --> 00:23:15,192
We haven't seen evidence
of any codified legal framework.
492
00:23:15,194 --> 00:23:17,027
I mean, it all
seems subject to public vote
493
00:23:17,029 --> 00:23:18,095
at any given time.
494
00:23:18,097 --> 00:23:20,331
Captain, what she is describing
495
00:23:20,333 --> 00:23:23,534
is an absolute,
unstructured democracy.
496
00:23:23,536 --> 00:23:26,737
There is no record of any
previously discovered society
497
00:23:26,739 --> 00:23:28,172
operating in such a fashion.
498
00:23:28,174 --> 00:23:29,840
Government by American idol.
499
00:23:29,842 --> 00:23:32,042
What is American idol?
500
00:23:32,044 --> 00:23:34,578
That was a form of entertainment
from old earth.
501
00:23:34,580 --> 00:23:37,047
People competed to see who had
the best singing voice.
502
00:23:37,049 --> 00:23:38,082
Why?
503
00:23:38,084 --> 00:23:39,917
I don't know.
504
00:23:39,919 --> 00:23:41,519
It was a dark time.
505
00:23:41,521 --> 00:23:44,188
I sing.
506
00:23:46,358 --> 00:23:48,559
Okay, I just want
to jump in here.
507
00:23:48,561 --> 00:23:51,095
You know, we talk to a lot of
different people on this show
508
00:23:51,097 --> 00:23:53,364
and I got to say, your apology
sounds very rehearsed.
509
00:23:53,366 --> 00:23:55,032
Yeah, it does.
510
00:23:57,036 --> 00:23:59,437
Do something.
511
00:23:59,439 --> 00:24:01,806
I can't. It's up to him.
512
00:24:01,808 --> 00:24:02,973
N-no, no, I-i swear to god.
513
00:24:02,975 --> 00:24:04,809
I-I'm so, so completely sorry.
514
00:24:04,811 --> 00:24:05,976
N-no bs.
515
00:24:05,978 --> 00:24:07,945
I-I even donated
516
00:24:07,947 --> 00:24:10,581
to the mella giffendon
foundation for jacked-up kids.
517
00:24:10,583 --> 00:24:13,083
The foundation
for disadvantaged children.
518
00:24:13,085 --> 00:24:14,819
Right. That's-that's the one.
519
00:24:14,821 --> 00:24:16,220
Uh, I gave a whole bunch
of money.
520
00:24:16,222 --> 00:24:17,221
Really?
521
00:24:17,223 --> 00:24:18,422
How many lods?
522
00:24:18,424 --> 00:24:20,991
- Oh, so many lods.
- How many?
523
00:24:20,993 --> 00:24:23,394
I just walked in there
and I made it rain lods.
524
00:24:23,396 --> 00:24:25,062
I was like, boom.
525
00:24:25,064 --> 00:24:27,231
- Lods for ev...
- I have a question.
526
00:24:27,233 --> 00:24:29,500
Can you tell us
what mella giffendon did
527
00:24:29,502 --> 00:24:32,069
that made her such a hero?
528
00:24:32,071 --> 00:24:34,104
- Oh, no.
- What?
529
00:24:34,106 --> 00:24:36,006
We didn't cover this.
530
00:24:36,008 --> 00:24:38,008
She was... she did
a lot of things,
531
00:24:38,010 --> 00:24:39,743
a lot of good things.
532
00:24:39,745 --> 00:24:41,912
Th-that's why there's a statue.
533
00:24:41,914 --> 00:24:44,482
Y-y-y-you don't get
a statue just sitting around.
534
00:24:44,484 --> 00:24:47,184
She got up, she got out,
535
00:24:47,186 --> 00:24:48,919
and she did what's what
536
00:24:48,921 --> 00:24:50,988
and that's why there's a statue.
537
00:24:50,990 --> 00:24:52,423
Name one thing she did.
538
00:24:52,425 --> 00:24:55,693
She saved the whale forests.
539
00:24:55,695 --> 00:24:58,095
He can't even name one thing.
540
00:24:58,097 --> 00:24:59,497
Oh, my god.
How about leading
541
00:24:59,499 --> 00:25:01,465
an entire settlement
of pioneers, for one.
542
00:25:01,467 --> 00:25:02,800
Okay,
I think we've heard enough.
543
00:25:02,802 --> 00:25:04,802
- Yeah.
- Let's vote. Shall we vote?
544
00:25:04,804 --> 00:25:06,470
Yeah. Let's vote.
545
00:25:06,472 --> 00:25:08,372
All
right, let's get his badge info
546
00:25:08,374 --> 00:25:09,940
up there on the screen.
547
00:25:09,942 --> 00:25:11,375
Okay. There it is.
548
00:25:11,377 --> 00:25:14,879
Studio audience and you folks
at home, cast your votes.
549
00:25:14,881 --> 00:25:17,014
Dude, I got to say,
this is creepy.
550
00:25:17,016 --> 00:25:18,782
I mean it.
This is creepy as hell.
551
00:25:29,294 --> 00:25:31,128
All right.
552
00:25:31,130 --> 00:25:33,130
Let's see where we're at.
553
00:25:41,139 --> 00:25:42,973
It's okay.
554
00:25:42,975 --> 00:25:45,109
He's got more shows to do.
555
00:25:49,514 --> 00:25:52,583
You think she'll help us?
556
00:25:52,585 --> 00:25:54,885
They had to have a base
of operations somewhere.
557
00:25:54,887 --> 00:25:56,954
She's the only one who might
be able to give us a lead.
558
00:26:02,594 --> 00:26:03,994
There you go.
559
00:26:03,996 --> 00:26:05,896
Oh, hey, guys.
560
00:26:05,898 --> 00:26:08,098
I am so, so sorry
about what happened.
561
00:26:08,100 --> 00:26:10,067
Well, thank you.
562
00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:11,569
We're optimistic
that he'll be okay.
563
00:26:11,571 --> 00:26:12,836
Who?
564
00:26:12,838 --> 00:26:15,172
John. Our friend
who got arrested.
565
00:26:15,174 --> 00:26:17,174
You're kidding me, right?
566
00:26:17,176 --> 00:26:18,842
Oh, my...
567
00:26:18,844 --> 00:26:20,444
No, screw that guy.
568
00:26:20,446 --> 00:26:21,879
Why would you ever want
to talk to him again?
569
00:26:21,881 --> 00:26:23,013
I mean, he got
a million downvotes.
570
00:26:23,015 --> 00:26:24,748
Right, yes, and that's bad.
571
00:26:24,750 --> 00:26:26,250
I-I mean, it's like
572
00:26:26,252 --> 00:26:29,086
- you never really know somebody, you know?
- Mm.
573
00:26:29,088 --> 00:26:31,589
I actually thought he was cute
when he first came in here.
574
00:26:31,591 --> 00:26:33,624
Ugh, god, that makes
my skin crawl.
575
00:26:33,626 --> 00:26:35,960
Mine, too.
Really, really gross guy.
576
00:26:35,962 --> 00:26:38,762
Listen, lysella, about our
friends who got corrected...
577
00:26:38,764 --> 00:26:40,598
Oh, my god, that's right.
578
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:43,767
Holy crap, you guys have had
a really bad month, huh?
579
00:26:43,769 --> 00:26:46,470
We were wondering if you might
know where they were based,
580
00:26:46,472 --> 00:26:48,939
like if they had
a residence nearby?
581
00:26:48,941 --> 00:26:51,375
Hey. Why are you wearing that?
582
00:26:51,377 --> 00:26:52,977
- Me?
- Yeah, you.
583
00:26:52,979 --> 00:26:54,545
Take that neffolo off.
584
00:26:54,547 --> 00:26:56,146
I'm sorry, the what?
585
00:26:56,148 --> 00:26:57,414
You're not kelvic.
586
00:26:57,416 --> 00:26:58,549
That's traditional
kelvic headwear.
587
00:26:58,551 --> 00:27:01,218
It's not a hat.
588
00:27:01,220 --> 00:27:03,320
Oh, no.
589
00:27:03,322 --> 00:27:05,623
Uh, I...
590
00:27:05,625 --> 00:27:07,925
- I can't.
- What?
591
00:27:07,927 --> 00:27:10,728
I have the deepest respect
for your place of origin,
592
00:27:10,730 --> 00:27:12,329
but I can't take this off.
593
00:27:12,331 --> 00:27:16,066
You're literally pissing
on my heritage by wearing that.
594
00:27:16,068 --> 00:27:19,069
I have a really bad rash
under here.
595
00:27:19,071 --> 00:27:20,938
It's disgusting.
You'd throw up, so...
596
00:27:20,940 --> 00:27:22,473
I think you're lying.
597
00:27:22,475 --> 00:27:23,841
Prove it
598
00:27:23,843 --> 00:27:25,342
or they're all gonna upload.
599
00:27:25,344 --> 00:27:26,744
Uh, you know what?
600
00:27:26,746 --> 00:27:28,479
You are absolutely right.
601
00:27:28,481 --> 00:27:30,080
We're gonna go
and take it off right now.
602
00:27:30,082 --> 00:27:32,416
Come on, alara.
We're very sorry.
603
00:27:35,754 --> 00:27:38,255
Claire, what am I gonna do?
604
00:27:38,257 --> 00:27:40,257
- Go on, take it off.
- What?
605
00:27:40,259 --> 00:27:41,258
Take it off.
606
00:27:41,260 --> 00:27:42,960
The seamstress is in the house.
607
00:27:42,962 --> 00:27:44,762
- What are you doing?
- I'm making you a wrap.
608
00:27:44,764 --> 00:27:46,530
Not super fashionable,
but it'll cover
609
00:27:46,532 --> 00:27:48,132
that washboard forehead
of yours.
610
00:27:48,134 --> 00:27:50,534
- Wow, full-service doctor.
- You know it.
611
00:27:50,536 --> 00:27:51,969
Hey, um, that guy's gone
612
00:27:51,971 --> 00:27:54,505
if you guys want to...
613
00:27:54,507 --> 00:27:57,274
New problem.
614
00:28:07,719 --> 00:28:08,986
- No!
- No!
615
00:28:08,988 --> 00:28:11,121
- No, no, no, no! It's okay.
- Come on. It's okay.
616
00:28:11,123 --> 00:28:13,123
- It's okay. You're fine.
- All right?
617
00:28:13,125 --> 00:28:14,358
You're okay.
618
00:28:14,360 --> 00:28:16,060
We're not gonna hurt you.
619
00:28:16,062 --> 00:28:18,128
What are you?
620
00:28:18,130 --> 00:28:22,833
We are two very nice people
621
00:28:22,835 --> 00:28:24,868
who are gonna buy you a drink.
622
00:28:38,983 --> 00:28:40,751
Feeling better?
623
00:28:40,753 --> 00:28:41,919
I-I just can't believe
624
00:28:41,921 --> 00:28:43,721
that this is actually happening.
625
00:28:43,723 --> 00:28:47,825
I mean, you guys really are
from another planet?
626
00:28:47,827 --> 00:28:50,060
Well, two different planets,
actually.
627
00:28:50,062 --> 00:28:51,595
Claire is from a place
called earth
628
00:28:51,597 --> 00:28:53,597
and I'm from a planet
called xelayan.
629
00:28:53,599 --> 00:28:56,533
So, can you guys,
like, do stuff?
630
00:28:56,535 --> 00:29:01,205
Like shoot lasers
out of your eyes or anything?
631
00:29:01,207 --> 00:29:02,940
I can do this.
632
00:29:04,876 --> 00:29:07,444
Oh, whoa.
633
00:29:07,446 --> 00:29:09,079
Lysella, we need your help.
634
00:29:09,081 --> 00:29:12,049
The two men you saw in the
pictures that we showed you,
635
00:29:12,051 --> 00:29:14,017
they're like us... they came here
to study your planet.
636
00:29:14,019 --> 00:29:15,419
We need to find them.
637
00:29:15,421 --> 00:29:17,921
Wait, those guys
were aliens, too?
638
00:29:17,923 --> 00:29:20,090
Yes. Do you know
what happened to them?
639
00:29:20,092 --> 00:29:22,426
Uh, they were on a subtrain
640
00:29:22,428 --> 00:29:24,428
and there was a pregnant woman
standing behind them
641
00:29:24,430 --> 00:29:26,430
because all the seats
were taken.
642
00:29:26,432 --> 00:29:27,965
Somebody took a picture. Here.
643
00:29:27,967 --> 00:29:30,968
I'll show you.
644
00:29:30,970 --> 00:29:33,303
They didn't get up
and offer the seat.
645
00:29:33,305 --> 00:29:35,305
The picture was uploaded
to the master feed
646
00:29:35,307 --> 00:29:37,374
and then they got downvoted.
647
00:29:37,376 --> 00:29:39,476
It looks like
they just didn't see her.
648
00:29:39,478 --> 00:29:42,412
Doesn't matter.
The people decided.
649
00:29:42,414 --> 00:29:44,414
That was always Lewis.
650
00:29:44,416 --> 00:29:47,117
Nose buried so deep in his work,
651
00:29:47,119 --> 00:29:48,919
he never had a clue
what was going on around him.
652
00:29:48,921 --> 00:29:50,988
But, uh,
there is something else.
653
00:29:50,990 --> 00:29:54,124
One of them tried to escape
before he was corrected.
654
00:29:54,126 --> 00:29:55,325
He got killed.
655
00:29:56,661 --> 00:29:59,263
- Which one?
- I don't remember.
656
00:29:59,265 --> 00:30:03,167
Lysella, where do they send
people who have been corrected?
657
00:30:03,169 --> 00:30:05,402
They send them home.
658
00:30:05,404 --> 00:30:08,305
I think your friends once told
me they lived on kappala street.
659
00:30:33,965 --> 00:30:36,099
These are Lewis's
research notes.
660
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:44,842
Doctor.
661
00:30:44,844 --> 00:30:47,144
Lewis!
662
00:30:47,146 --> 00:30:49,847
Lewis, thank god.
Are you all right?
663
00:30:49,849 --> 00:30:52,516
I am well.
664
00:30:52,518 --> 00:30:55,452
Don't you recognize me?
665
00:30:55,454 --> 00:30:56,954
It's Claire.
666
00:30:56,956 --> 00:30:59,323
Of course. Claire.
667
00:30:59,325 --> 00:31:02,025
You look healthy and happy.
668
00:31:04,028 --> 00:31:05,963
Lewis, I need to know.
669
00:31:05,965 --> 00:31:07,497
What did they do to you?
670
00:31:07,499 --> 00:31:11,568
I did something terrible
and then I was corrected.
671
00:31:11,570 --> 00:31:13,170
I'm better now.
672
00:31:13,172 --> 00:31:17,741
I'm healthier and happier.
673
00:31:17,743 --> 00:31:19,643
I have to get him
back to the ship.
674
00:31:22,513 --> 00:31:26,984
- John, do you have any talents
I should know about? -What?
675
00:31:26,986 --> 00:31:28,552
Can you dance
or play an instrument?
676
00:31:28,554 --> 00:31:30,821
What the hell does that
have to do with anything?
677
00:31:30,823 --> 00:31:33,357
Um, look, we're not doing
too well here.
678
00:31:33,359 --> 00:31:36,026
We should have a lot fewer
downvotes and we don't.
679
00:31:36,028 --> 00:31:38,528
But people tend
to be more sympathetic,
680
00:31:38,530 --> 00:31:41,164
more forgiving of a crime,
if the perpetrator has talent.
681
00:31:41,166 --> 00:31:43,867
That makes them more likable,
more relatable.
682
00:31:43,869 --> 00:31:45,869
Hmm. Uh, I can drink
an entire bottle of Tequila
683
00:31:45,871 --> 00:31:47,337
and say the alphabet.
684
00:31:47,339 --> 00:31:51,375
Just go out there with a lot
of positive energy.
685
00:31:51,377 --> 00:31:54,411
Get the audience on your side.
686
00:31:55,747 --> 00:31:57,915
All right, ladies and gentlemen.
687
00:31:57,917 --> 00:31:59,783
My next guest is a guy
688
00:31:59,785 --> 00:32:02,953
you've all seen or heard about
on the feed.
689
00:32:02,955 --> 00:32:04,855
His actions speak
for themselves.
690
00:32:04,857 --> 00:32:06,623
Here's John lamarr.
691
00:32:09,561 --> 00:32:11,028
Hey, hey, hey.
692
00:32:13,098 --> 00:32:15,666
All right. Okay.
693
00:32:18,603 --> 00:32:21,705
You know, I got to say,
I'm surprised by that entrance.
694
00:32:21,707 --> 00:32:22,773
You liked it?
695
00:32:22,775 --> 00:32:24,041
You're in a lot of trouble
696
00:32:24,043 --> 00:32:26,043
for doing something
extremely disrespectful
697
00:32:26,045 --> 00:32:27,911
and not only did you
dance out here
698
00:32:27,913 --> 00:32:29,813
acting like it's nothing,
699
00:32:29,815 --> 00:32:32,883
but you struck several members
of the audience.
700
00:32:32,885 --> 00:32:34,785
For god's sake, willks, what
the hell are you trying to do?
701
00:32:34,787 --> 00:32:36,553
Hey, I'm giving
this my best shot here.
702
00:32:36,555 --> 00:32:39,823
Now, this job entails
a lot of guesswork.
703
00:32:41,392 --> 00:32:44,995
Lewis, is there anything you can
tell us about that planet
704
00:32:44,997 --> 00:32:47,064
that might help us repair
the damage they did to you?
705
00:32:47,066 --> 00:32:48,598
There is no damage.
706
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:51,268
I am healthy and happy.
707
00:32:51,270 --> 00:32:53,070
But what about tom?
708
00:32:53,072 --> 00:32:54,671
Lewis, they killed him.
709
00:32:54,673 --> 00:32:57,341
My god, his family.
710
00:32:57,343 --> 00:32:58,976
Please tell tom's family
711
00:32:58,978 --> 00:33:01,945
I wish them great happiness
and good health.
712
00:33:01,947 --> 00:33:05,649
Captain, it's like
he's been lobotomized.
713
00:33:05,651 --> 00:33:06,917
There's nothing I can do.
714
00:33:06,919 --> 00:33:08,518
The brain damage is too severe.
715
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:12,289
Sir, we can't let them
do this to John.
716
00:33:12,291 --> 00:33:15,659
Okay,
it is voting time, audience,
717
00:33:15,661 --> 00:33:17,327
and you folks at home.
718
00:33:17,329 --> 00:33:18,929
Here we go.
719
00:33:18,931 --> 00:33:21,031
Do you believe John's apology?
720
00:33:21,033 --> 00:33:23,266
Sound off now.
721
00:33:35,947 --> 00:33:37,047
Damn it.
722
00:33:37,049 --> 00:33:39,049
Now what?
723
00:33:39,051 --> 00:33:40,717
Well, that's it.
724
00:33:40,719 --> 00:33:44,054
Now he goes back to detention to
wait for the final summary vote.
725
00:33:44,056 --> 00:33:45,522
And then?
726
00:33:45,524 --> 00:33:48,625
Well, if he stays
below ten million downvotes
727
00:33:48,627 --> 00:33:50,127
before the tour window elapses,
728
00:33:50,129 --> 00:33:52,229
he's fine.
729
00:33:52,231 --> 00:33:55,999
But, honestly, I've never seen
anyone above nine million
730
00:33:56,001 --> 00:33:58,368
at this stage
who came out uncorrected.
731
00:33:59,637 --> 00:34:01,438
I'm sorry, Kelly.
732
00:34:03,741 --> 00:34:05,142
Grayson to Orville.
733
00:34:05,144 --> 00:34:07,077
Mercer here. Go ahead.
734
00:34:07,079 --> 00:34:09,146
Captain, what's the latest
from Claire?
735
00:34:09,148 --> 00:34:10,714
She can't repair the damage.
736
00:34:10,716 --> 00:34:12,616
Then John is in big trouble.
737
00:34:13,851 --> 00:34:17,354
We need some kind
of an inside advantage.
738
00:34:17,356 --> 00:34:18,522
What can we do?
739
00:34:18,524 --> 00:34:19,656
The admiral said that
740
00:34:19,658 --> 00:34:21,391
we couldn't send anyone in,
741
00:34:21,393 --> 00:34:25,162
but he never said
we couldn't pull someone out.
742
00:34:25,164 --> 00:34:28,432
Claire, what's the name of your
little friend down there?
743
00:34:28,434 --> 00:34:30,000
Lysella.
744
00:34:31,936 --> 00:34:34,337
We're gonna bring her
aboard the Orville.
745
00:35:00,932 --> 00:35:04,101
Oh, my... god.
746
00:35:12,143 --> 00:35:14,211
It's incredible.
747
00:35:14,213 --> 00:35:16,613
It's so big.
748
00:35:16,615 --> 00:35:18,815
The Orville's only midsize.
749
00:35:18,817 --> 00:35:21,017
You should see
the heavy cruisers.
750
00:35:28,659 --> 00:35:31,128
I'll just hang onto that
until we take you home.
751
00:35:31,130 --> 00:35:35,098
But nobody's gonna believe me
if I don't have pictures.
752
00:35:35,100 --> 00:35:37,200
Exactly.
753
00:35:55,419 --> 00:35:58,188
We're sorry to turn your world
upside down like this,
754
00:35:58,190 --> 00:35:59,923
but we need your help.
755
00:35:59,925 --> 00:36:01,591
Believe me,
this is the coolest thing
756
00:36:01,593 --> 00:36:03,026
that has ever happened to me.
757
00:36:03,028 --> 00:36:05,795
What are they again?
758
00:36:05,797 --> 00:36:08,932
Commander bortus is a member
of a species called moclan.
759
00:36:08,934 --> 00:36:10,133
I am an artificial
760
00:36:10,135 --> 00:36:12,135
life-form
from a planet called kaylon.
761
00:36:12,137 --> 00:36:13,937
Wow.
762
00:36:13,939 --> 00:36:15,472
Bortus, can you make a note?
763
00:36:15,474 --> 00:36:17,140
We should have, like,
pretzels and water and stuff
764
00:36:17,142 --> 00:36:18,608
on the table
when people come in here.
765
00:36:18,610 --> 00:36:22,112
- Noted, captain. I will not fail you.
- Great.
766
00:36:22,114 --> 00:36:24,948
Lysella, what can you tell us
about your planet that might
767
00:36:24,950 --> 00:36:26,716
help us figure out
a way to save John?
768
00:36:26,718 --> 00:36:27,951
Your world is...
769
00:36:27,953 --> 00:36:30,353
Hard to get a handle on.
770
00:36:30,355 --> 00:36:31,788
How so?
771
00:36:31,790 --> 00:36:34,491
Well, the voting and rating.
772
00:36:34,493 --> 00:36:37,127
Those badges...
You all wear them?
773
00:36:37,129 --> 00:36:38,695
Yeah. You get one
when you turn 18,
774
00:36:38,697 --> 00:36:41,131
and then, you wear it
for the rest of your life.
775
00:36:41,133 --> 00:36:42,966
It's how we can tell
who's good and who's bad.
776
00:36:42,968 --> 00:36:45,335
So this is
an absolute democracy?
777
00:36:45,337 --> 00:36:47,804
Yeah. How does your world work?
778
00:36:47,806 --> 00:36:50,674
We select representatives
who discuss issues
779
00:36:50,676 --> 00:36:51,975
and enact laws.
780
00:36:51,977 --> 00:36:54,144
But what about everybody else?
781
00:36:54,146 --> 00:36:55,879
Everybody deserves a voice.
782
00:36:55,881 --> 00:36:57,714
That's what we're taught.
783
00:36:57,716 --> 00:36:59,583
A voice should be earned,
784
00:36:59,585 --> 00:37:01,184
not given away.
785
00:37:01,186 --> 00:37:04,020
How do you know...
786
00:37:04,022 --> 00:37:05,689
What foods are healthiest
for your children,
787
00:37:05,691 --> 00:37:07,691
or what medicine to take
if you're sick?
788
00:37:07,693 --> 00:37:09,926
- We vote.
- I believe
789
00:37:09,928 --> 00:37:12,696
you are confusing opinion
with knowledge.
790
00:37:12,698 --> 00:37:15,599
I think what he's asking is,
with so many voices at once,
791
00:37:15,601 --> 00:37:17,434
how do you filter out the truth?
792
00:37:17,436 --> 00:37:20,237
Well, my dad always says,
"the majority are the truth."
793
00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:22,439
I mean, you always know
what the majority wants.
794
00:37:22,441 --> 00:37:24,040
That's what matters.
795
00:37:24,042 --> 00:37:26,743
Well, you always know
what the mob wants, too.
796
00:37:26,745 --> 00:37:29,446
And right now, the mob wants
to lobotomize my navigator.
797
00:37:29,448 --> 00:37:31,781
Now, there must be
some way to...
798
00:37:31,783 --> 00:37:34,251
Influence the mass perception
before it's too late.
799
00:37:34,253 --> 00:37:37,621
Well... everybody reads
the master feed.
800
00:37:37,623 --> 00:37:39,222
What's the master feed?
801
00:37:39,224 --> 00:37:40,924
It's a continuously streaming
opinion feed.
802
00:37:40,926 --> 00:37:42,892
We saw them everywhere.
803
00:37:42,894 --> 00:37:46,963
Could this... feed turn
the public tide in John's favor?
804
00:37:46,965 --> 00:37:50,634
Well, yeah,
but everybody uses the feed.
805
00:37:50,636 --> 00:37:53,236
I mean, how are you gonna get
millions of people
806
00:37:53,238 --> 00:37:54,638
to change their minds?
807
00:37:54,640 --> 00:37:57,774
I believe I have a suggestion.
808
00:38:23,634 --> 00:38:25,902
Oh, hell, no. Hell, no.
809
00:38:25,904 --> 00:38:27,771
- Y'all not putting me in that
thing! Get off me! -Hey.
810
00:38:27,773 --> 00:38:29,839
- Hey, take it easy!
- Hey! Hey!
811
00:38:40,151 --> 00:38:41,918
Um, tell me they got this!
812
00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:45,088
- How much time?
- Final vote begins
813
00:38:45,090 --> 00:38:46,756
in... seven minutes.
814
00:38:48,292 --> 00:38:50,860
Grayson to Orville.
We're running out of time.
815
00:38:50,862 --> 00:38:52,529
Stand by.
Isaac, what's your status?
816
00:38:52,531 --> 00:38:54,030
I have gained access
817
00:38:54,032 --> 00:38:56,032
- to the master feed.
- All right, lysella,
818
00:38:56,034 --> 00:38:58,635
what kind of stuff would
endear him to your people?
819
00:38:58,637 --> 00:39:01,971
Um,... you could say he supports
his grandmother financially.
820
00:39:01,973 --> 00:39:04,140
- Do it. -But make sure
you word it right.
821
00:39:04,142 --> 00:39:06,643
Like say,
"oh, my god, I just found out
822
00:39:06,645 --> 00:39:08,778
John lamarr supports
his 90-year-old grandmother."
823
00:39:08,780 --> 00:39:11,548
Flooding the feed
with 20 million entries.
824
00:39:11,550 --> 00:39:13,049
How can you do that?
825
00:39:13,051 --> 00:39:16,052
- Babe. Spaceship.
- All right, what else?
826
00:39:16,054 --> 00:39:17,821
If he was an overweight kid,
that would help.
827
00:39:17,823 --> 00:39:21,324
Access childhood image of John.
828
00:39:21,326 --> 00:39:24,561
Ugh. Crap, that's no good.
Isaac, can you make him fatter?
829
00:39:24,563 --> 00:39:26,830
That's better.
830
00:39:26,832 --> 00:39:28,064
People will like him now.
831
00:39:28,066 --> 00:39:30,633
Flooding the feed
with the image.
832
00:39:30,635 --> 00:39:33,136
The entries are spreading
and multiplying.
833
00:39:33,138 --> 00:39:34,637
People are sharing them.
834
00:39:34,639 --> 00:39:35,905
What if people try
to corroborate
835
00:39:35,907 --> 00:39:37,407
all this information?
836
00:39:37,409 --> 00:39:39,576
Don't worry. They won't.
837
00:39:39,578 --> 00:39:43,546
Final vote has begun.
838
00:39:56,927 --> 00:39:59,229
Ed, we're out of time.
839
00:39:59,231 --> 00:40:01,898
- What else? We need something else!
- Um...
840
00:40:03,901 --> 00:40:05,735
No, no, no, no, no, no. No!
841
00:40:05,737 --> 00:40:07,070
No. Come on! No!
842
00:40:07,072 --> 00:40:10,006
Tell them he has slain
many enemies in battle.
843
00:40:10,008 --> 00:40:11,708
Or you could just say
he's a veteran.
844
00:40:11,710 --> 00:40:13,376
What if he has a dog
named chuckles?
845
00:40:13,378 --> 00:40:14,911
Yes, that's great.
People love those videos
846
00:40:14,913 --> 00:40:16,713
of soldiers reuniting
with their pets.
847
00:40:16,715 --> 00:40:19,983
Access military attire for the
planet and simulate the video.
848
00:40:22,620 --> 00:40:25,288
- -Oh, chuckles.
Oh, chuckles, come here!
849
00:40:25,290 --> 00:40:27,090
Yeah. Yeah!
850
00:40:27,092 --> 00:40:29,025
Oh, my god, chuckles,
851
00:40:29,027 --> 00:40:31,060
I missed you so much!
I'm so happy
852
00:40:31,062 --> 00:40:33,096
to be reunited with you.
853
00:40:33,098 --> 00:40:35,632
Oh, chuckles, I missed you
when I was at war.
854
00:40:35,634 --> 00:40:37,867
That's tuggin'
at these heartstrings.
855
00:40:37,869 --> 00:40:39,602
Flood the feed with that.
856
00:41:21,445 --> 00:41:24,814
I don't believe it.
857
00:41:24,816 --> 00:41:26,516
John, you won!
858
00:41:26,518 --> 00:41:28,151
You're damn right I won!
859
00:41:28,153 --> 00:41:31,154
Now get this crap off of me,
you crazy sons of bitches!
860
00:41:31,156 --> 00:41:32,822
According to the feed,
861
00:41:32,824 --> 00:41:35,658
lieutenant lamarr
has escaped punishment.
862
00:41:37,661 --> 00:41:39,896
Come on, John.
Let's get you out of here.
863
00:41:45,135 --> 00:41:47,003
- Congratulations!
- Real quick,
864
00:41:47,005 --> 00:41:49,839
I just want to say,
all y'all can suck ass,
865
00:41:49,841 --> 00:41:52,008
and I'm a spaceman.
866
00:41:52,010 --> 00:41:53,910
I...
867
00:41:58,949 --> 00:42:01,784
Lysella, thank you.
868
00:42:01,786 --> 00:42:04,821
No. Thank you for...
869
00:42:04,823 --> 00:42:07,490
Letting me see all of this.
870
00:42:07,492 --> 00:42:10,159
I just wish
I could tell somebody.
871
00:42:10,161 --> 00:42:12,228
Well, maybe all you need
to tell them is that
872
00:42:12,230 --> 00:42:14,797
their world can do better.
873
00:42:46,096 --> 00:42:48,531
I think I speak for
all of our viewers when I say
874
00:42:48,533 --> 00:42:51,234
that what you have done is
shocking to say the least.
875
00:42:51,236 --> 00:42:54,170
But, of course,
that's for the people to decide.
876
00:42:54,172 --> 00:42:56,105
That's all the time
we have for today.
877
00:42:56,107 --> 00:42:59,609
Don't forget to cast your votes,
and we'll see you tomorrow.
878
00:43:11,956 --> 00:43:17,026
Captioned by
media access group at wgbh