1 00:00:01,634 --> 00:00:03,063 Mum died three years ago. 2 00:00:03,093 --> 00:00:04,884 She had a double mastectomy, but never really recovered. 3 00:00:04,909 --> 00:00:07,451 So why do you think your father suggested you come for counselling? 4 00:00:07,451 --> 00:00:09,082 Because my mother died and he can't talk about it. 5 00:00:09,107 --> 00:00:12,454 - Thanks, Dad. - Get your hands off my miscarriage! 6 00:00:12,493 --> 00:00:13,882 - I'm sorry for your loss. - What? 7 00:00:13,907 --> 00:00:15,732 - Your baby. - Oh. 8 00:00:15,733 --> 00:00:17,859 So, there is a particular person you're not having sex with? 9 00:00:17,884 --> 00:00:18,969 He's not available. 10 00:00:18,994 --> 00:00:22,353 I believe God meant for me to love people as a father. 11 00:00:22,401 --> 00:00:23,462 I'll go up to three. 12 00:00:23,509 --> 00:00:24,635 No-one's asked me a question in 45 minutes... 13 00:00:24,659 --> 00:00:25,744 So, what do you do? 14 00:00:25,798 --> 00:00:28,899 You'll always be interesting with your quirky cafe 15 00:00:28,924 --> 00:00:30,313 and your dead best friend. 16 00:00:30,338 --> 00:00:34,364 Celibacy is a lot less complicated than romantic relationships. 17 00:00:35,136 --> 00:00:36,958 But what if you meet someone you like? 18 00:00:37,027 --> 00:00:40,231 I talk and drink and laugh and give them Bibles 19 00:00:40,256 --> 00:00:42,004 and hope they eventually leave me alone. 20 00:00:42,029 --> 00:00:43,287 What if you meet someone you love? 21 00:00:43,357 --> 00:00:46,079 We're not going to have sex. 22 00:00:46,180 --> 00:00:48,178 I'd really like to be your friend, though. 23 00:00:48,203 --> 00:00:49,454 I'd like to be your friend too. 24 00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:50,842 What makes you a normal person? 25 00:00:50,843 --> 00:00:52,282 Well, I don't believe in God... 26 00:00:52,283 --> 00:00:53,643 I love it when he does that. 27 00:00:55,683 --> 00:00:57,427 I don't know. 28 00:00:57,483 --> 00:00:58,700 Just come out. 29 00:01:04,243 --> 00:01:05,842 - I prefer the last one. - Me too. 30 00:01:05,843 --> 00:01:07,522 - It's a bit more subtle. - Elegant, yeah. 31 00:01:07,523 --> 00:01:08,842 - It's these bits, isn't it? - Yep. 32 00:01:08,843 --> 00:01:11,003 - Yep, last one, definitely. - Yep. Great. 34 00:01:19,339 --> 00:01:20,722 - Really pleased with that! - Yeah. 35 00:01:20,723 --> 00:01:23,282 - Once it's nipped in there... - Oh, it'll be perfect. 36 00:01:23,283 --> 00:01:24,522 His arms. 37 00:01:24,523 --> 00:01:26,652 - Do you prefer weddings or funerals? - Weddings. 38 00:01:26,677 --> 00:01:27,716 His arms. 39 00:01:27,741 --> 00:01:29,458 I think there's something humbling about funerals. 40 00:01:29,483 --> 00:01:30,278 Really? 41 00:01:30,278 --> 00:01:32,816 Yeah, it's good to dwell on the next life. 42 00:01:32,817 --> 00:01:34,620 You really think there's a next life? 43 00:01:34,645 --> 00:01:36,725 What do you believe? Worm food? 44 00:01:38,205 --> 00:01:39,717 - Why?! - Why what? 45 00:01:39,742 --> 00:01:40,787 His neck. 46 00:01:40,812 --> 00:01:43,092 Why would you believe in something awful when you could 47 00:01:43,117 --> 00:01:44,694 believe in something wonderful? 48 00:01:44,719 --> 00:01:48,256 Don't make me an optimist, you will ruin my life. 49 00:01:49,165 --> 00:01:52,084 - Have you been to many funerals? - A couple. 50 00:01:52,085 --> 00:01:52,883 His neck. 51 00:01:52,883 --> 00:01:55,405 And you've never felt them go somewhere? 52 00:01:55,430 --> 00:01:56,365 No, they were already gone. 53 00:01:56,390 --> 00:01:57,645 His beautiful neck. 54 00:01:57,670 --> 00:01:58,763 What? 55 00:01:59,896 --> 00:02:00,949 What? 56 00:02:00,974 --> 00:02:02,752 You just said, "His beautiful neck". 57 00:02:03,430 --> 00:02:06,915 No, I said that they'd already gone. 58 00:02:07,790 --> 00:02:09,589 Okay. Weird. 59 00:02:09,590 --> 00:02:11,305 Oh, right, so... 60 00:02:12,110 --> 00:02:15,176 This might be your idea of hell... 61 00:02:15,790 --> 00:02:19,106 ...but I think it's kind of special. 62 00:02:21,215 --> 00:02:22,819 His beautiful neck. 63 00:02:31,686 --> 00:02:33,579 Quaker meeting. 64 00:02:33,950 --> 00:02:35,270 You're not allowed to speak. 65 00:02:36,350 --> 00:02:38,509 If the Spirit moves you to speak, you have to stand up 66 00:02:38,534 --> 00:02:40,298 and share it with everyone. 67 00:02:41,313 --> 00:02:43,352 It's very intense. 68 00:02:43,416 --> 00:02:45,237 It's very quiet. 69 00:02:45,360 --> 00:02:48,128 It's very, very... 70 00:02:49,018 --> 00:02:50,300 ...erotic. 71 00:03:03,510 --> 00:03:04,550 Oh. 72 00:03:06,510 --> 00:03:08,477 I think... 73 00:03:09,156 --> 00:03:13,570 I'm going to go home in November. 74 00:03:15,312 --> 00:03:16,630 I think. 75 00:03:31,870 --> 00:03:33,070 What's he thinking? 76 00:03:38,870 --> 00:03:40,390 What's he thinking? 77 00:03:49,303 --> 00:03:50,599 I don't really think it's... 78 00:03:50,624 --> 00:03:52,795 I'm not really feeling the... 79 00:03:52,820 --> 00:03:54,381 I don't think it's really affecting me... 80 00:03:54,405 --> 00:03:56,053 Oh, my... 81 00:03:56,632 --> 00:03:58,269 Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. 82 00:03:58,270 --> 00:04:00,491 What am I going to say? What am I going to say? 83 00:04:02,286 --> 00:04:04,065 I sometimes worry 84 00:04:05,002 --> 00:04:06,605 that I wouldn't be such a feminist 85 00:04:06,630 --> 00:04:08,542 if I had bigger tits. 86 00:04:25,166 --> 00:04:27,441 - Well, it's good you felt something. - Is it? 87 00:04:27,466 --> 00:04:28,918 Something moved you. 88 00:04:28,943 --> 00:04:31,879 I'm not sure I needed to me moved to discover that about myself. 89 00:04:32,887 --> 00:04:34,137 What were you thinking? 90 00:04:34,161 --> 00:04:35,411 I was thinking about how peaceful 91 00:04:35,436 --> 00:04:37,685 I felt and then for some reason, I was thinking about your tits, 92 00:04:37,710 --> 00:04:38,815 which kind of ruined it. 93 00:04:38,839 --> 00:04:41,429 - Oh, my tits ruined your peace? - Yeah. You could say that. 94 00:04:45,494 --> 00:04:47,564 - I should probably open the cafe... - I've got a confession actually... 95 00:04:47,589 --> 00:04:49,462 - Oh, can I see it? - Uh... 96 00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,429 Oh, yeah... 97 00:04:51,492 --> 00:04:52,837 It's a bit... 98 00:04:53,470 --> 00:04:54,744 What? 99 00:04:55,375 --> 00:04:56,885 - It's a bit... - What... 100 00:04:56,910 --> 00:04:58,500 ...the fuck? 101 00:05:00,510 --> 00:05:02,297 Hello. 102 00:05:02,374 --> 00:05:05,643 Oh, you gorgeous little thing. 103 00:05:07,190 --> 00:05:09,325 Can I ask, um, 104 00:05:09,411 --> 00:05:11,435 why so many guinea pigs? 105 00:05:11,513 --> 00:05:12,989 Oh, um... 106 00:05:12,990 --> 00:05:14,286 I just, um... 107 00:05:15,430 --> 00:05:18,082 This is an excellent one. 108 00:05:18,143 --> 00:05:19,824 I just thought it'd be a unique selling point. 109 00:05:19,848 --> 00:05:21,215 Yeah. 110 00:05:21,262 --> 00:05:23,824 Which came first, the guinea pig or the guinea pig cafe? 111 00:05:23,887 --> 00:05:26,907 That is a big, old question. 112 00:05:26,950 --> 00:05:28,290 Fair enough. 113 00:05:29,462 --> 00:05:30,954 What do guinea pigs do? 114 00:05:30,979 --> 00:05:33,547 They are born, they shit themselves with fear and then they die. 115 00:05:36,086 --> 00:05:38,477 Can I use that at the wedding? 116 00:05:38,501 --> 00:05:39,789 Seriously, I need material. 117 00:05:39,830 --> 00:05:42,313 Tell me about your stepmother-to-be. 118 00:05:42,367 --> 00:05:44,687 Any... What's she like? 119 00:05:44,743 --> 00:05:46,984 Oh, she's, um... 120 00:05:47,765 --> 00:05:50,305 - she's from Exeter. - Mm. 121 00:05:50,710 --> 00:05:52,961 Okay, thank you, that's very helpful. 122 00:05:53,159 --> 00:05:55,399 - How did she meet your dad? - Through my mother. 123 00:05:55,471 --> 00:05:56,523 Right. 124 00:05:56,576 --> 00:05:58,388 She was my mother's student at one point. 125 00:05:58,430 --> 00:06:00,670 - Do your parents get on? - No. 126 00:06:00,710 --> 00:06:02,943 - Were you close to your mum? - Yeah. 127 00:06:03,031 --> 00:06:04,670 You? 128 00:06:04,714 --> 00:06:06,433 Not really. 129 00:06:06,467 --> 00:06:08,092 - How come? - So, that must've been a bit weird? 130 00:06:08,127 --> 00:06:10,006 I don't really think about it. 131 00:06:15,168 --> 00:06:17,111 - So, you run... No, no. - Do you go back a lot to... 132 00:06:17,169 --> 00:06:20,263 Do you run this place on your own? 133 00:06:20,293 --> 00:06:22,589 - No, I opened it with a friend. - Oh, cool, right. 134 00:06:22,590 --> 00:06:24,849 - So, you run it together? - No, she's... 135 00:06:25,625 --> 00:06:27,091 ...she, uh... 136 00:06:27,150 --> 00:06:28,396 She what? 137 00:06:31,750 --> 00:06:33,177 What? 138 00:06:33,710 --> 00:06:36,200 - What? - She... she what? 139 00:06:37,350 --> 00:06:38,910 She... 140 00:06:40,506 --> 00:06:41,668 He's a bit annoying actually. 141 00:06:41,722 --> 00:06:43,641 What is that? 142 00:06:43,672 --> 00:06:44,831 What? 143 00:06:44,895 --> 00:06:47,854 That thing that you're doing. It's like you disappear. 144 00:06:47,910 --> 00:06:49,095 - What? - What are you not telling me? 145 00:06:49,120 --> 00:06:50,039 Nothing! 146 00:06:50,064 --> 00:06:51,189 Tell me what going on underneath there. 147 00:06:51,214 --> 00:06:52,384 - Nothing! - Tell me, come on! 148 00:06:52,408 --> 00:06:53,311 - No! - You can tell me. 149 00:06:53,336 --> 00:06:55,201 - Nothing! Nothing! - Argh! What are you doing?! 150 00:06:55,226 --> 00:06:57,269 - Stop being so churchy. - I'm not being churchy. 151 00:06:57,270 --> 00:06:59,750 - I'm just trying to get to know you. - Well, I don't want that. 152 00:07:09,750 --> 00:07:11,998 Listen, I'm just trying to help you. 153 00:07:13,060 --> 00:07:14,310 What? 154 00:07:15,858 --> 00:07:17,483 No. No, I didn't mean... 155 00:07:17,538 --> 00:07:18,821 Oh, I know what you mean, Father. 156 00:07:18,845 --> 00:07:19,936 Thank you so much for your guidance. 157 00:07:19,999 --> 00:07:21,149 Come on, I didn't mean... 158 00:07:21,150 --> 00:07:22,335 I really should get back to work. 159 00:07:22,376 --> 00:07:23,788 A customer's bound to turn up any minute. 160 00:07:23,850 --> 00:07:26,241 And you should be getting back to God, don't you think? 161 00:07:29,184 --> 00:07:31,522 I think you played with my guinea pig long enough. 162 00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:42,112 Okay. 163 00:07:50,150 --> 00:07:51,504 All right, bye. 164 00:08:08,310 --> 00:08:11,518 Sorry, girls. People are starting to arrive. 165 00:08:16,026 --> 00:08:18,152 She was a spectacular woman. 166 00:08:30,270 --> 00:08:32,273 Don't worry. We can sort this out. 167 00:08:45,297 --> 00:08:46,789 Stop doing that to your face. 168 00:08:46,790 --> 00:08:49,349 No, I have to. I don't know what's wrong! 169 00:08:49,444 --> 00:08:51,549 I just... 170 00:08:51,574 --> 00:08:52,936 I look so good. 171 00:08:52,990 --> 00:08:54,685 It's okay. We can sort it out. 172 00:08:54,710 --> 00:08:56,802 Just... Take some of your makeup off. 173 00:08:56,827 --> 00:08:57,968 I'm not wearing any makeup. 174 00:08:57,998 --> 00:08:59,116 What? 175 00:08:59,117 --> 00:09:00,160 What has happened? 176 00:09:00,185 --> 00:09:01,927 - I have never seen you look so good. - I don't know, I just woke up... 177 00:09:01,974 --> 00:09:03,420 ...looking amazing and then everyone's going to think 178 00:09:03,444 --> 00:09:05,709 I got a fucking facial for my mother's funeral. 179 00:09:05,771 --> 00:09:07,909 Oh, what the hell? You look incredible. 180 00:09:07,910 --> 00:09:09,509 We're trying to mess her up. 181 00:09:09,534 --> 00:09:12,041 No matter what I do to my hair, it just keeps falling in this 182 00:09:12,076 --> 00:09:13,916 really chic way. 183 00:09:14,215 --> 00:09:15,686 Oh, God. 184 00:09:15,750 --> 00:09:18,215 - You look perfect. - Thank you. 185 00:09:18,270 --> 00:09:20,449 Sorry, girls. People are starting to arrive. 186 00:09:20,519 --> 00:09:21,676 Thank you. 187 00:09:21,723 --> 00:09:23,114 You don't have to greet them if it's too... 188 00:09:23,149 --> 00:09:25,395 Gosh, you look gorgeous. 189 00:09:25,436 --> 00:09:26,465 Thank you. 190 00:09:28,521 --> 00:09:30,600 - I'm so sorry. - Thank you. 191 00:09:30,656 --> 00:09:33,020 - You look glorious. - Thank you. 192 00:09:33,113 --> 00:09:35,472 - Have you spoken to Dad? - No, not yet. 193 00:09:35,566 --> 00:09:36,965 He's avoiding me. 194 00:09:37,030 --> 00:09:39,466 My deepest condolences, girls. 195 00:09:39,491 --> 00:09:41,010 She was magnificent. 196 00:09:41,070 --> 00:09:43,521 - Thanks so much. - My God, you look well. 197 00:09:43,546 --> 00:09:45,065 Thank you. Have you? 198 00:09:45,095 --> 00:09:46,774 No, he's not really engaging. 199 00:09:46,830 --> 00:09:49,232 She was a spectacular woman. 200 00:09:49,270 --> 00:09:51,166 - Thanks. - Darling, you look wonderful. 201 00:09:51,241 --> 00:09:52,900 Oh, my God. 202 00:09:52,955 --> 00:09:54,127 - Hi, Claire. - Hi. 203 00:09:54,180 --> 00:09:57,099 Gosh. Grief clearly agrees with you. 204 00:09:57,170 --> 00:09:58,450 Thank you, Jeremy. 205 00:10:00,670 --> 00:10:02,295 Oh. Incoming. 206 00:10:03,150 --> 00:10:04,189 How are you doing? 207 00:10:04,190 --> 00:10:06,147 My God, she's shameless. 208 00:10:06,230 --> 00:10:08,952 Can you not think the fucking worst of someone for just a split 209 00:10:09,006 --> 00:10:10,349 fucking second? 210 00:10:10,350 --> 00:10:12,052 Not everyone is after cock. 211 00:10:23,441 --> 00:10:25,400 She's definitely trying to fuck my dad. 212 00:10:25,464 --> 00:10:26,944 Well, she ain't made of wood. 213 00:10:28,490 --> 00:10:29,834 Do you want a ciggie? 214 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:34,919 Ooh, incoming. 215 00:10:34,967 --> 00:10:36,395 Hi, Harry. 216 00:10:36,470 --> 00:10:38,075 Hi. Hi. 217 00:10:38,150 --> 00:10:39,426 - You okay? - Mm-hm. 218 00:10:40,343 --> 00:10:41,822 You? 219 00:10:41,870 --> 00:10:42,821 Do you need anything? 220 00:10:42,882 --> 00:10:46,601 No, I'm good thanks. I've just had a large glass of water. 221 00:10:46,672 --> 00:10:48,231 Are your trousers okay? 222 00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:50,782 Yeah, sorry, I left them in the drier. 223 00:10:50,842 --> 00:10:51,868 Ah, mate. 224 00:10:51,928 --> 00:10:54,599 Ah, shit, sorry. 225 00:10:54,677 --> 00:10:55,990 It's okay. 226 00:10:56,661 --> 00:11:00,021 It's just funerals when you actually knew the person... 227 00:11:00,075 --> 00:11:01,396 They're so... 228 00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:10,062 It just doesn't feel real. 229 00:11:12,510 --> 00:11:14,229 I'm just going to miss her so much. 230 00:11:15,895 --> 00:11:18,381 - Have you cried yet? - Yes. 231 00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:20,959 But I didn't see you cr... 232 00:11:21,407 --> 00:11:23,486 Wow, you look.. 233 00:11:23,542 --> 00:11:25,022 Have you had your eyebrows done? 234 00:11:26,365 --> 00:11:28,639 Hi, girls. How you doing? 235 00:11:28,710 --> 00:11:30,109 - All right. - Okay, thanks. 236 00:11:30,110 --> 00:11:32,186 You know, the hard bit's going to come in a few weeks 237 00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:34,014 when it all calms down. 238 00:11:34,069 --> 00:11:36,186 - Yeah, I have heard. - They do say that, yeah. 239 00:11:36,225 --> 00:11:38,100 When people start to forget 240 00:11:38,163 --> 00:11:40,467 and the cards and the flowers stop turning up. 241 00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:41,615 - Yeah. - Uh-huh, yeah. 242 00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:43,428 And people just disappear because it spooks them 243 00:11:43,453 --> 00:11:45,418 to be around someone perpetually in pain. 244 00:11:45,443 --> 00:11:46,498 - Okay. - Right. 245 00:11:46,523 --> 00:11:48,545 And your lovely boyfriends might not be able to cope. 246 00:11:48,570 --> 00:11:50,290 - Well, he's my husband... - I'm sure they'll push through. 247 00:11:50,315 --> 00:11:53,634 I just want you to know that I will always be there for you, always. 248 00:11:53,696 --> 00:11:55,462 - Always. - Thank you. 249 00:11:56,559 --> 00:11:57,599 Always. 250 00:11:59,671 --> 00:12:00,967 Always. 251 00:12:02,164 --> 00:12:03,827 I'm going to check on the sausagerolls. 252 00:12:03,852 --> 00:12:05,132 Okay. 253 00:12:11,332 --> 00:12:13,101 See? 254 00:12:13,510 --> 00:12:14,750 Okay. 255 00:12:20,027 --> 00:12:21,135 Hey. 256 00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:23,168 I don't know how you're eating. 257 00:12:23,698 --> 00:12:24,978 Do something. 258 00:12:40,944 --> 00:12:42,023 Hi. 259 00:12:42,071 --> 00:12:44,142 Oh. Hello, darling. 260 00:12:45,870 --> 00:12:48,494 - Bit tight. - Oh, yeah. 261 00:12:49,174 --> 00:12:50,624 Tell me about it. 262 00:12:57,635 --> 00:13:00,565 I found her very difficult, you know. 263 00:13:01,150 --> 00:13:02,659 I know. 264 00:13:02,968 --> 00:13:06,518 I loved her, but, um... 265 00:13:06,594 --> 00:13:09,190 - That's all that really matters. - No, I don't think it is. 266 00:13:10,928 --> 00:13:12,435 Her instincts were... 267 00:13:13,630 --> 00:13:16,848 She just knew how to be fun. 268 00:13:17,424 --> 00:13:18,943 How to be kind. 269 00:13:19,023 --> 00:13:20,465 She just knew. 270 00:13:22,126 --> 00:13:23,670 I'm just guessing. 271 00:13:26,167 --> 00:13:27,446 You're fun, Dad. 272 00:13:27,510 --> 00:13:29,871 No, I didn't like that about her. 273 00:13:30,712 --> 00:13:33,847 I loved her, but I didn't like that she was... 274 00:13:37,030 --> 00:13:39,159 For a long time, I... 275 00:13:41,430 --> 00:13:42,750 And today... 276 00:13:45,310 --> 00:13:46,709 ...I was jealous of her. 277 00:13:49,628 --> 00:13:52,323 That is a lovely thing to say, really. 278 00:13:52,941 --> 00:13:54,270 Oh, sorry. 279 00:13:57,568 --> 00:13:59,234 I'll leave you two. 280 00:14:06,630 --> 00:14:09,082 - She's a bit annoying, isn't she? - Mm. 281 00:14:10,886 --> 00:14:12,575 Look, let's go and find your sister. 282 00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:14,481 Yeah, I don't think she wants to see me. 283 00:14:14,550 --> 00:14:16,379 She loves you. 284 00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:19,513 She just didn't get the fun gene. 285 00:14:27,855 --> 00:14:29,615 I just... 286 00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:33,030 - I don't know what to... - I know. 287 00:14:36,585 --> 00:14:38,384 Buck up. 288 00:14:38,470 --> 00:14:39,709 Smile. 289 00:14:39,750 --> 00:14:41,012 Charm. 290 00:14:42,150 --> 00:14:43,830 Off we go. 291 00:14:45,350 --> 00:14:46,670 We'll be okay. 292 00:14:50,801 --> 00:14:52,048 I'll follow you. 293 00:14:56,128 --> 00:14:58,007 You look lovely, by the way. 294 00:14:58,054 --> 00:14:59,294 Thank you. 295 00:15:15,350 --> 00:15:17,577 I don't know what to do with it. 296 00:15:17,670 --> 00:15:19,139 With what? 297 00:15:19,230 --> 00:15:21,150 With all the love I have for her. 298 00:15:23,582 --> 00:15:27,144 I don't know where to put it now. 299 00:15:28,332 --> 00:15:31,223 I'll take it. 300 00:15:31,265 --> 00:15:32,965 No, I'm serious. 301 00:15:33,027 --> 00:15:35,493 It sounds lovely. 302 00:15:35,946 --> 00:15:37,925 I'll have it. 303 00:15:37,950 --> 00:15:40,587 - You have to give it to me. - Okay. 304 00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:43,904 It's got to go somewhere. 305 00:16:04,827 --> 00:16:07,178 ♪ Children grow and women producing ♪ 306 00:16:07,248 --> 00:16:09,670 ♪ Men go working, some go stealing ♪ 307 00:16:09,733 --> 00:16:12,153 ♪ Everyone's got to make a living ♪ 308 00:16:13,559 --> 00:16:14,911 ♪ L O X, yeah ♪ 309 00:16:15,903 --> 00:16:17,293 ♪ J. Lo, yeah ♪ 310 00:16:18,642 --> 00:16:20,480 ♪ We off the block this year ♪ 311 00:16:20,551 --> 00:16:22,802 ♪ Went from a little to a lot this year ♪ 312 00:16:23,551 --> 00:16:25,467 ♪ Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got ♪ 313 00:16:25,537 --> 00:16:27,740 ♪ I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block ♪ 314 00:16:27,802 --> 00:16:29,950 ♪ Used to have a little, now I have a lot ♪ 315 00:16:30,037 --> 00:16:32,774 ♪ No matter where I go, I know where I came from... ♪ 316 00:16:32,799 --> 00:16:35,633 Oh, fuck! Fuck! Jesus! 317 00:16:35,688 --> 00:16:37,812 Why are you awake? It's 9:45! 318 00:16:37,874 --> 00:16:39,909 Oh, my God! I thought you were just in my head, then! 319 00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:42,288 But, I mean, you were in my head, then. 320 00:16:42,350 --> 00:16:44,569 But now you're there! 321 00:16:46,006 --> 00:16:47,485 You okay, Father? 322 00:16:47,510 --> 00:16:49,188 Ah, fuck, you calling me "Father" 323 00:16:49,212 --> 00:16:51,758 like it doesn't turn you on just to say it. 324 00:16:55,950 --> 00:16:58,919 - Do you want a drink? - Okay. 325 00:16:59,013 --> 00:17:00,230 Don't move. 326 00:17:05,856 --> 00:17:07,576 Are you a nostalgic person? 327 00:17:09,037 --> 00:17:10,229 Yeah. 328 00:17:10,326 --> 00:17:12,451 - Do you like Winnie the Pooh? - Yeah. 329 00:17:12,510 --> 00:17:14,789 I fucking love Winnie the Pooh. 330 00:17:14,790 --> 00:17:17,365 I can't read a Winnie the Pooh quote without crying. 331 00:17:17,983 --> 00:17:19,423 Fuck. 332 00:17:20,479 --> 00:17:21,879 Piglet. 333 00:17:23,350 --> 00:17:24,830 Piglet. 334 00:17:26,084 --> 00:17:27,403 Why are you here? 335 00:17:27,428 --> 00:17:29,956 Sorry, but I mean why, why are you... 336 00:17:30,070 --> 00:17:31,823 Were you looking for me? 337 00:17:34,870 --> 00:17:37,276 I was on the verge of having a little prayer, actually. 338 00:17:38,620 --> 00:17:40,683 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 339 00:17:40,722 --> 00:17:43,761 Don't, don't you... That's my thing. 340 00:17:43,790 --> 00:17:45,211 What were you praying about? 341 00:17:45,235 --> 00:17:46,469 Please say you were praying for me. 342 00:17:46,470 --> 00:17:47,995 I could do with the extra pair of hands. 343 00:17:48,050 --> 00:17:52,558 Mine don't seem to have the fucking reach any more. 344 00:17:54,790 --> 00:17:56,795 God help me! 345 00:17:56,950 --> 00:17:58,545 Whoa! 346 00:17:58,710 --> 00:18:00,150 Thank you. 347 00:18:02,446 --> 00:18:04,231 Do you know there was a man who wanted to be a saint 348 00:18:04,256 --> 00:18:07,387 so badly he castrated himself just to stop himself? 349 00:18:08,578 --> 00:18:10,904 You know... whack! 350 00:18:12,219 --> 00:18:13,699 Wow! 351 00:18:20,559 --> 00:18:21,896 Here's to peace. 352 00:18:24,510 --> 00:18:26,510 And those who get in the way of it. 353 00:18:41,257 --> 00:18:42,937 I'm sorry about today. 354 00:18:44,294 --> 00:18:45,556 Forget it. 355 00:18:46,361 --> 00:18:48,281 Look at this. 356 00:18:53,909 --> 00:18:55,349 Look at it. 357 00:18:55,443 --> 00:18:57,043 That's the first one I ever got. 358 00:18:58,590 --> 00:19:00,970 Went all the way to Rome for that. 359 00:19:01,030 --> 00:19:02,455 Such a nerd! 360 00:19:04,001 --> 00:19:07,658 Two years before I was even allowed to wear it, but I just... 361 00:19:07,900 --> 00:19:09,017 I couldn't wait. 362 00:19:09,070 --> 00:19:13,306 I couldn't wait! I knew I wanted a bold, 363 00:19:13,390 --> 00:19:16,205 you know, this colour, but proper plum. 364 00:19:16,310 --> 00:19:18,430 You can only get proper plum in Italy. 365 00:19:19,510 --> 00:19:21,950 Sometimes I worry I'm only in it for the outfits. 366 00:19:25,110 --> 00:19:26,512 So beautiful, isn't it? 367 00:19:30,296 --> 00:19:31,849 I mean, your stuff is lovely, too. 368 00:19:33,907 --> 00:19:35,138 What were you praying about? 369 00:19:40,955 --> 00:19:43,439 You don't like answering questions, do you? 370 00:19:49,630 --> 00:19:50,901 Okay. 371 00:19:56,591 --> 00:19:58,271 Come with me. 372 00:20:00,836 --> 00:20:02,430 I know what to do with you. 373 00:20:04,030 --> 00:20:06,844 You go in there, I go in there. 374 00:20:07,510 --> 00:20:09,238 And you make me tell you all my secrets 375 00:20:09,312 --> 00:20:11,191 so you can ultimately trap and control me? 376 00:20:11,215 --> 00:20:13,416 Yeah. No. 377 00:20:13,441 --> 00:20:14,810 You tell me what's weighing on your heart 378 00:20:14,834 --> 00:20:16,051 and I listen without judgment 379 00:20:16,082 --> 00:20:18,184 - and in complete confidence. - Sounds dodgy! 380 00:20:18,208 --> 00:20:19,429 I just listen. 381 00:20:19,484 --> 00:20:21,625 At the very least it'll shut me up for a minute. 382 00:20:21,649 --> 00:20:23,797 - I'm not Catholic. - Tonight, that doesn't matter. 383 00:20:23,844 --> 00:20:25,352 Won't I catch fire or something? 384 00:20:25,390 --> 00:20:27,669 If you did, it would confirm my faith, so let's try it. 385 00:20:27,693 --> 00:20:29,341 Go on. 386 00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:34,960 Go on. 387 00:20:38,790 --> 00:20:40,110 All right. 388 00:20:52,830 --> 00:20:55,123 Okay, now you say, "Bless me father for I have sinned." 389 00:20:55,201 --> 00:20:57,326 - I'm not going to say that! - Well, very good. 390 00:20:57,381 --> 00:20:59,887 "It's been..." Uh, enter days, years, months 391 00:20:59,943 --> 00:21:01,566 - "...since my last confession." - Mm-hmm. 392 00:21:01,605 --> 00:21:04,099 Then I say, "That's okay, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah", 393 00:21:04,153 --> 00:21:05,466 till you tell me what's on your mind. 394 00:21:05,490 --> 00:21:07,312 Tell me your ssss... 395 00:21:07,364 --> 00:21:10,504 - Sins. - Sins, if you want. 396 00:21:10,550 --> 00:21:13,480 - Why would I tell you my sins? - Because it will make you feel better! 397 00:21:13,535 --> 00:21:16,291 And because I want to know. 398 00:21:18,830 --> 00:21:20,080 Okay. 399 00:21:27,057 --> 00:21:28,769 I lied. 400 00:21:28,863 --> 00:21:30,309 Okay. 401 00:21:30,638 --> 00:21:32,118 To you. 402 00:21:32,915 --> 00:21:36,288 - About? - About the miscarriage. 403 00:21:43,753 --> 00:21:46,370 I was just covering for my sister who actually had the miscarriage, 404 00:21:46,431 --> 00:21:49,190 because her husband didn't know she was pregnant, and it just... 405 00:21:49,955 --> 00:21:51,435 Okay. 406 00:21:54,989 --> 00:21:56,709 Keep going. 407 00:21:58,106 --> 00:22:00,119 And I've stolen things. 408 00:22:00,985 --> 00:22:05,250 I've had a lot of sex outside of marriage. 409 00:22:06,510 --> 00:22:09,307 And once or twice inside someone else's. 410 00:22:10,031 --> 00:22:12,551 And there's been a spot of sodomy. 411 00:22:13,112 --> 00:22:16,182 Um, there's been much masturbation, 412 00:22:16,207 --> 00:22:18,815 a bit of violence, and of course the endless fucking blasphemy. 413 00:22:20,950 --> 00:22:22,430 And? 414 00:22:23,496 --> 00:22:24,936 And... 415 00:22:27,485 --> 00:22:30,125 - Go on. - And... 416 00:22:33,197 --> 00:22:34,757 I... 417 00:22:38,186 --> 00:22:39,906 ...I can't... 418 00:22:41,065 --> 00:22:42,945 It's okay, go on. 419 00:22:44,105 --> 00:22:46,625 - Frightened. - Of what? 420 00:22:47,950 --> 00:22:49,482 Forgetting things. 421 00:22:51,052 --> 00:22:52,677 People. 422 00:22:53,083 --> 00:22:54,622 Forgetting people. 423 00:22:58,830 --> 00:23:03,349 And I'm ashamed of not knowing what I... 424 00:23:03,810 --> 00:23:05,643 What you want? It's okay not to know what you want. 425 00:23:05,714 --> 00:23:09,737 No, I know what I want. I know exactly what I want right now. 426 00:23:09,816 --> 00:23:11,581 What's that? 427 00:23:13,782 --> 00:23:15,652 It's bad. 428 00:23:16,188 --> 00:23:17,588 It's okay. 429 00:23:19,536 --> 00:23:22,182 I want someone to tell me what to wear in the morning. 430 00:23:23,950 --> 00:23:25,839 Okay, well, I think there are people who can... 431 00:23:25,911 --> 00:23:28,871 No, I want someone to tell me what to wear every morning. 432 00:23:30,110 --> 00:23:33,270 I want someone to tell me what to eat, 433 00:23:33,323 --> 00:23:35,189 what to like, what to hate, 434 00:23:35,238 --> 00:23:36,918 what to rage about, 435 00:23:36,996 --> 00:23:39,215 what to listen to, what band to like, 436 00:23:39,286 --> 00:23:41,073 what to buy tickets for, 437 00:23:41,136 --> 00:23:42,989 what to joke about, what not to joke about. 438 00:23:43,081 --> 00:23:45,479 I want someone to tell me what to believe in, 439 00:23:46,612 --> 00:23:47,643 who to vote for, 440 00:23:47,698 --> 00:23:51,121 and who to love, and how to... tell them. 441 00:23:56,110 --> 00:23:58,546 I just think I want someone to tell me 442 00:24:00,147 --> 00:24:01,502 how to live my life, Father, 443 00:24:01,585 --> 00:24:04,070 because so far I think I've been getting it wrong. 444 00:24:05,602 --> 00:24:08,477 And I know that's why people want people like you in their lives. 445 00:24:08,550 --> 00:24:11,032 Because you just tell them how to do it. 446 00:24:11,110 --> 00:24:13,703 You just tell them what to do, 447 00:24:13,797 --> 00:24:15,189 and what they'll get out of the end of it. 448 00:24:15,239 --> 00:24:17,622 Even though I don't believe your bullshit, and I know that 449 00:24:17,670 --> 00:24:20,764 scientifically nothing I do makes any difference in the end anyway, 450 00:24:20,830 --> 00:24:24,186 I'm still scared! Why am I still scared?! 451 00:24:34,430 --> 00:24:36,231 So just tell me what to do. 452 00:24:40,470 --> 00:24:43,379 Just fucking tell me what to do, Father! 453 00:24:52,312 --> 00:24:53,623 Kneel. 454 00:24:55,688 --> 00:24:57,208 What? 455 00:24:59,825 --> 00:25:01,406 Kneel. 456 00:25:07,322 --> 00:25:08,820 Just kneel. 457 00:26:35,276 --> 00:26:38,456 - Is this a skirt and trousers? - Sorry, sorry.