1 00:00:08,942 --> 00:00:11,412 * * 2 00:00:13,914 --> 00:00:15,816 TICK: The heroic moment, 3 00:00:15,883 --> 00:00:18,719 that pointy fulcrum in time 4 00:00:18,786 --> 00:00:21,122 -that either breaks your seesaw inhalf, -(panting) 5 00:00:21,189 --> 00:00:24,458 or puts your ride 6 00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:27,528 on the playground of justice for good. 7 00:00:27,595 --> 00:00:28,829 (gasps) 8 00:00:28,896 --> 00:00:30,331 The moment you first grok 9 00:00:30,398 --> 00:00:32,133 the dangers that lie ahead 10 00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:33,767 and take a stand 11 00:00:33,834 --> 00:00:37,004 -against evil. -Huh. 12 00:00:37,071 --> 00:00:39,006 Get him on his feet. Lock this down. 13 00:00:39,073 --> 00:00:41,409 -No one in or out. -(grunts) 14 00:00:41,475 --> 00:00:43,111 ARTHUR: Oh, my God. 15 00:00:43,177 --> 00:00:44,645 You shot me. 16 00:00:44,712 --> 00:00:46,180 (grunts) 17 00:00:46,247 --> 00:00:48,882 You can't just shoot a person! Twice! 18 00:00:48,949 --> 00:00:52,186 But look how the bullets flatten against the suit you stole. 19 00:00:52,253 --> 00:00:53,787 I didn't take the suit, he did. 20 00:00:53,854 --> 00:00:55,789 -Who? -He sa-said 21 00:00:55,856 --> 00:00:57,458 it was gonna fit me and then he jumped out the window, 22 00:00:57,525 --> 00:00:59,327 but then I didn't do anything for a while. 23 00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:00,961 -I was just... -Who? 24 00:01:01,028 --> 00:01:02,730 Who jumped out the window? 25 00:01:02,796 --> 00:01:04,432 -Him! -(clattering) 26 00:01:05,633 --> 00:01:08,769 Unhand that precious balloon of hope. 27 00:01:10,871 --> 00:01:11,939 TICK: Arthur. 28 00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:13,807 You put on the suit. 29 00:01:13,874 --> 00:01:17,445 You're the one that blew up my operation and my men. 30 00:01:17,511 --> 00:01:19,880 I'm pretty sure it was all that reckless gunfire 31 00:01:19,947 --> 00:01:22,683 that blew up your operation. 32 00:01:22,750 --> 00:01:24,818 Yeah, it's like bullet Christmas with you people. 33 00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:26,187 What are you? 34 00:01:26,254 --> 00:01:28,922 I am the wild blue yonder. 35 00:01:28,989 --> 00:01:33,161 Villain, you face The Tick. 36 00:01:33,961 --> 00:01:35,263 -Mmm. -Huh. 37 00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:38,132 Angry lightning lady. 38 00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:39,833 The name is Miss Lint. 39 00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:42,303 (laughs) I don't get it. 40 00:01:42,370 --> 00:01:44,672 -You get this? -(electrical crackling) 41 00:01:44,738 --> 00:01:46,840 (screams) 42 00:01:46,907 --> 00:01:49,843 Great white taser tots. 43 00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:50,844 (Tick screams) 44 00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:55,916 Why won't you die? 45 00:01:55,983 --> 00:01:58,852 I... don't... wanna! 46 00:01:58,919 --> 00:02:00,288 (Miss Lint grunts) 47 00:02:00,354 --> 00:02:03,123 (electrical crackling, thugs groan) 48 00:02:04,992 --> 00:02:07,995 And that's why you can't have nice things. 49 00:02:08,061 --> 00:02:09,730 (Tick groans) 50 00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:14,368 Watch out! She shoots glass eyes. 51 00:02:19,173 --> 00:02:20,374 Let's get you somewhere safe, chum. 52 00:02:20,441 --> 00:02:21,842 What? No, no, no, no, no! 53 00:02:21,909 --> 00:02:24,212 (screams) 54 00:02:27,181 --> 00:02:29,817 (thud, car alarm wails) 55 00:02:31,051 --> 00:02:32,686 WOMAN (shouts): Turn that off! 56 00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:34,488 (gasps) 57 00:02:34,555 --> 00:02:37,191 (alarm continues wailing) 58 00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:46,166 (alarm stops) 59 00:02:46,234 --> 00:02:47,401 Okay. 60 00:02:47,468 --> 00:02:49,203 -(alarm chirps) -Oh, shit, oh, shit, oh, shit. 61 00:02:53,073 --> 00:02:55,209 -(Arthur whimpers) -* * 62 00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:58,446 (whimpering, panting) 63 00:03:01,048 --> 00:03:03,517 * * 64 00:03:31,078 --> 00:03:33,314 * * 65 00:03:34,248 --> 00:03:36,384 (high-tech whir) 66 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,955 (electronic beeping) 67 00:03:52,300 --> 00:03:54,234 (exhales) 68 00:03:54,302 --> 00:03:55,803 Okay. 69 00:03:57,605 --> 00:03:59,507 -Here we are. -(gasps) 70 00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:01,074 I told you that outfit was a winner. 71 00:04:01,141 --> 00:04:02,610 Two bullets point-blank 72 00:04:02,676 --> 00:04:04,712 and high voltage, plus a three-story drop 73 00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:05,979 and look at you. 74 00:04:06,046 --> 00:04:08,549 You're as alive as a daisy. 75 00:04:08,616 --> 00:04:09,883 (sighs) 76 00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:11,885 (electrical crackle) 77 00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:27,034 (door opens and closes) 78 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:29,737 Ramses wants to see you. 79 00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:36,444 And I quit. 80 00:04:39,380 --> 00:04:41,014 (phone beeps) 81 00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:43,651 I'm on my way. 82 00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:46,954 * * 83 00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:49,089 * Every time I want to, I call you * 84 00:04:49,156 --> 00:04:51,692 * No need to control myself * 85 00:04:51,759 --> 00:04:54,895 * And I wanted you to know * 86 00:04:54,962 --> 00:04:57,531 * Yeah, that, darling, if you're lonely * 87 00:04:57,598 --> 00:04:58,699 * You know what you gotta do * 88 00:04:58,766 --> 00:05:01,234 * Yeah, all you gotta do is call * 89 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:02,636 (grunts) 90 00:05:04,405 --> 00:05:06,507 * Yeah, 'cause whenever you need me * 91 00:05:06,574 --> 00:05:08,308 * You know that I'd be there * 92 00:05:08,376 --> 00:05:10,277 * You're my best friend. * 93 00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:11,879 BECK: Yo, Stick. 94 00:05:11,945 --> 00:05:13,381 Don't call me "Stick." 95 00:05:13,447 --> 00:05:15,416 I'm being mean. We're on the oval right now. 96 00:05:15,483 --> 00:05:16,850 It's being mean time. 97 00:05:16,917 --> 00:05:19,152 We're on the same team, it's practice. 98 00:05:19,219 --> 00:05:20,621 Yeah, practicing being mean. 99 00:05:20,688 --> 00:05:22,255 Girl, where your game at? 100 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,757 It's my brother. 101 00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:25,426 He's not answering my calls. 102 00:05:25,493 --> 00:05:27,094 He usually responds to a text, but he's not. 103 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:28,729 Look, Dot. 104 00:05:28,796 --> 00:05:30,898 I know you had to bail your brother out last night, right? 105 00:05:30,964 --> 00:05:32,199 Wait. Correction. 106 00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:34,435 You bailed on taking your big midterm last night, 107 00:05:34,502 --> 00:05:36,370 and then you drove across the river, 108 00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:37,838 and then you bailed your brother out. 109 00:05:37,905 --> 00:05:41,842 Technically, I didn't have to bail him out. 110 00:05:43,110 --> 00:05:44,812 They just signed him over. 111 00:05:46,980 --> 00:05:49,249 Even they could tell he's a basket case. 112 00:05:49,316 --> 00:05:52,620 ARTHUR: There are so many dead bodies in my apartment. 113 00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:54,187 What were you doing bringing Miss Lint 114 00:05:54,254 --> 00:05:56,223 and-and the entire Pyramid gang down on my head like that? 115 00:05:56,289 --> 00:05:59,593 Oh, I'd love to take the credit, Arthur, but that was all you. 116 00:05:59,660 --> 00:06:02,262 You did all the legwork, followed the leads, 117 00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:04,698 and struck villain gold. 118 00:06:04,765 --> 00:06:07,901 -(Tick sighs) -What? 119 00:06:07,968 --> 00:06:11,639 Have you ever seen a more beautiful alley? 120 00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:13,240 (sighs) 121 00:06:13,306 --> 00:06:14,675 Did you, uh... 122 00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:17,711 You look kind of, uh, different. 123 00:06:17,778 --> 00:06:18,912 Thanks. 124 00:06:18,979 --> 00:06:20,848 (scoff) You know, you stole their suit 125 00:06:20,914 --> 00:06:22,516 and practically tricked me into wearing it. 126 00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:23,984 What were you thinking, Tick? 127 00:06:24,051 --> 00:06:27,387 Oh, I always let destiny do the melon work, friend. 128 00:06:27,455 --> 00:06:30,057 Thought it not my area of expertise. 129 00:06:30,123 --> 00:06:32,125 Goodness, no. (laughs) 130 00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:35,062 Now, what's the plan? 131 00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:36,464 -What? -The plan. 132 00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:38,065 When you didn't circle back to the fray, 133 00:06:38,131 --> 00:06:42,936 I figured you must be pulling some kind of finesse move. 134 00:06:43,003 --> 00:06:44,271 Well, I'm all ears. 135 00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:45,573 Give me the skinny. 136 00:06:45,639 --> 00:06:46,740 I don't have a skinny. 137 00:06:46,807 --> 00:06:48,108 Okay, what am I doing? What have I done? 138 00:06:48,175 --> 00:06:50,978 You just had your first super-villain battle, 139 00:06:51,044 --> 00:06:53,213 and you look great. 140 00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:55,716 Okay. I, um... 141 00:06:55,783 --> 00:06:57,184 I'm wearing their suit. 142 00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,219 Not their suit, your suit. 143 00:06:59,286 --> 00:07:02,422 No. No, no, no, no. 144 00:07:02,490 --> 00:07:05,593 No, no, no. 145 00:07:08,496 --> 00:07:09,963 (TV plays indistinctly nearby) 146 00:07:12,032 --> 00:07:14,001 BOY (on TV): Whoa, what is that? 147 00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:15,402 BOY 2: I don't know. You should try it. 148 00:07:15,469 --> 00:07:16,837 BOY 1: I'm not gonna try it. 149 00:07:16,904 --> 00:07:17,938 You try it. 150 00:07:18,005 --> 00:07:19,306 (wind whistles) 151 00:07:19,372 --> 00:07:21,441 -Hey, kids. -Wow. -Wow. 152 00:07:21,509 --> 00:07:22,776 -It's Superian! -It's Superian! 153 00:07:22,843 --> 00:07:24,344 Not everything that glows 154 00:07:24,411 --> 00:07:26,046 gives you superpowers. 155 00:07:26,113 --> 00:07:28,015 And no, that glowing ooze is not magic. 156 00:07:28,081 --> 00:07:30,250 It's probably unstable industrial effluents, 157 00:07:30,317 --> 00:07:31,852 or unnatural secretions. 158 00:07:31,919 --> 00:07:35,088 Or how about plain old-fashioned radioactive? 159 00:07:35,155 --> 00:07:36,123 (gasps) 160 00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:37,625 It's probably giving you cancer. 161 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:41,929 -Ponchos. -Shh. 162 00:07:41,995 --> 00:07:44,197 -Seems an odd turn. -Shh. 163 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,702 Just looking for the strategic value 164 00:07:48,769 --> 00:07:50,804 of helping this establishment to restock 165 00:07:50,871 --> 00:07:53,273 -Shh. -(quietly): its ponchos. 166 00:07:53,340 --> 00:07:55,643 -Shh. -(on TV): The city warehouse district was rocked 167 00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:57,511 this morning by a massive explosion. 168 00:07:59,346 --> 00:08:00,347 Oh, Arthur. 169 00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:02,215 Grand theft poncho. 170 00:08:02,282 --> 00:08:04,618 Tick, I need to cover this suit immediately. 171 00:08:04,685 --> 00:08:06,754 But we can't be party to a pilfering. 172 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:09,189 It's not pilfering, it's paying later. 173 00:08:09,256 --> 00:08:12,192 Hey. You are stealing? 174 00:08:12,259 --> 00:08:14,294 No. This... 175 00:08:14,361 --> 00:08:16,429 Look, we are not here to cause any trouble. 176 00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:17,865 What do you mean, "we"? 177 00:08:21,535 --> 00:08:23,036 -I need to borrow this poncho. -What? 178 00:08:23,103 --> 00:08:25,973 -For, like, half an hour? -You cannot borrow a poncho. 179 00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:28,041 -Please. Let me. -This is not a poncho library. 180 00:08:28,108 --> 00:08:29,943 -I'm opening the poncho. -Do not open the poncho. 181 00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:31,945 I'm going to call the police. 182 00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:34,347 -Oh, the police? -I'm going to speed-dial the police. 183 00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:36,183 You pay organized crime weekly 184 00:08:36,249 --> 00:08:38,218 to protect your store and you say nothing. 185 00:08:38,285 --> 00:08:40,287 At least the organized crime is organized. 186 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:41,722 This is chaos. 187 00:08:41,789 --> 00:08:43,323 -This is chaos. -Do not open the poncho. 188 00:08:43,390 --> 00:08:45,793 -I'm calling them now. -(phone dials) -(Arthur laughs) 189 00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:48,829 -(laughs) Oh, do not... Please, don't. -(line ringing) 190 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:59,072 (pants) 191 00:08:59,139 --> 00:09:00,340 Okay. 192 00:09:00,407 --> 00:09:02,175 They're never gonna stop coming after the suit, 193 00:09:02,242 --> 00:09:04,244 but maybe I can give it back to them. 194 00:09:04,311 --> 00:09:05,646 Give it back? To crime? 195 00:09:05,713 --> 00:09:07,147 Are you insane? 196 00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:12,285 * * 197 00:09:19,192 --> 00:09:21,762 Oh, shit. 198 00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:31,304 -(electrical crackle) -Shit. 199 00:09:33,707 --> 00:09:35,609 Hello, Lint. 200 00:09:35,676 --> 00:09:37,344 What's with the Hazmat guys? 201 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:39,747 What's with all the failure? 202 00:09:39,813 --> 00:09:41,081 This isn't my fault. 203 00:09:41,148 --> 00:09:42,650 Someone put heroes on the trail of that shipment 204 00:09:42,716 --> 00:09:44,151 and I took the hit. 205 00:09:44,217 --> 00:09:47,721 What do you want with all that shit anyway, Ramses? 206 00:09:47,788 --> 00:09:50,123 You don't know the first thing about super-tech. 207 00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:51,992 You know I think my issue with you 208 00:09:52,059 --> 00:09:53,827 is you're just not a team player. 209 00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:56,730 I mean, everyone else in the gang 210 00:09:56,797 --> 00:09:59,332 got the tattoo, but not you. 211 00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:01,268 No, not your crew. 212 00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:03,336 Jesus. The tattoo again. 213 00:10:03,403 --> 00:10:05,673 Yes, the tattoo again. 214 00:10:05,739 --> 00:10:07,540 Kind of got my own eye thing going on. 215 00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:08,809 Yeah, nobody missed that. 216 00:10:08,876 --> 00:10:11,578 It's like you're looking at me with bacon. 217 00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:13,280 I will never understand your obsession 218 00:10:13,346 --> 00:10:16,216 with all this ancient Egyptian bullshit. 219 00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:18,786 Ramses IV? You're from fucking Minnesota. 220 00:10:18,852 --> 00:10:20,320 It is not bullshit, it is branding. 221 00:10:20,387 --> 00:10:23,657 Branding is power. Do you not get that? 222 00:10:23,724 --> 00:10:28,295 No, I guess you don't get that. 223 00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:31,064 You get your ass handed to you. 224 00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:34,067 I've got six other hitters out there. 225 00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:35,936 I'll get your damn suit back. 226 00:10:36,003 --> 00:10:38,505 I know you think you're better than us, 227 00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:42,042 because you were The Terror's number one circus freak. 228 00:10:42,109 --> 00:10:44,778 But he's been dead... a long time. 229 00:10:44,845 --> 00:10:47,114 You work for me now. 230 00:10:47,180 --> 00:10:52,319 And if you can't handle your obligations... 231 00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:54,054 I have options. 232 00:10:58,025 --> 00:10:59,392 (beeps) 233 00:11:03,063 --> 00:11:05,298 -(electrical crackle) -(groans) Shit. 234 00:11:05,365 --> 00:11:06,666 You all right? 235 00:11:06,734 --> 00:11:07,835 Yeah. 236 00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:09,803 -(crackle) -Shit. 237 00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:11,538 Just having a little grounding issue. 238 00:11:11,604 --> 00:11:13,206 Oh, well, fuck off. 239 00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:16,710 TICK: Tell me up is down. 240 00:11:16,777 --> 00:11:18,078 Tell me left is tidy. 241 00:11:18,145 --> 00:11:20,213 That makes more sense than this. 242 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:21,882 They may kill me, but they might not. 243 00:11:21,949 --> 00:11:24,417 It's my best shot... I think. 244 00:11:24,484 --> 00:11:27,687 (sighs) So, you're willing to outright steal a poncho 245 00:11:27,755 --> 00:11:30,157 from the workingman, yet you won't keep 246 00:11:30,223 --> 00:11:33,393 a super-snazzy supersuit with wings and goggles 247 00:11:33,460 --> 00:11:34,828 and armor and everything, 248 00:11:34,895 --> 00:11:36,363 even when it doesn't belong 249 00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:37,597 to the gang we're fighting? 250 00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:39,199 Tick, I'm not a hero. 251 00:11:39,266 --> 00:11:41,501 I don't think that heroes solve anything. 252 00:11:41,568 --> 00:11:42,803 Heroes solve villains. 253 00:11:42,870 --> 00:11:44,004 This is civilization. 254 00:11:44,071 --> 00:11:45,739 We have agencies that do that. 255 00:11:45,806 --> 00:11:47,875 Tick, look, I would... The Terror 256 00:11:47,941 --> 00:11:49,442 is still alive... 257 00:11:49,509 --> 00:11:51,945 and people need to know that. 258 00:11:52,012 --> 00:11:54,447 I was trying to prove that, and that's it. 259 00:11:54,514 --> 00:11:57,550 The Terror took something from you... 260 00:11:57,617 --> 00:11:59,753 didn't he, Arthur? 261 00:11:59,820 --> 00:12:01,121 Yeah. 262 00:12:02,890 --> 00:12:05,025 We got to pick up the rig in an hour. 263 00:12:05,092 --> 00:12:06,259 You want to get some lunch? 264 00:12:06,326 --> 00:12:08,628 No, you go ahead. I'll meet you at dispatch. 265 00:12:08,695 --> 00:12:09,897 Okay. 266 00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:13,233 Hey, Dottie. 267 00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:15,903 Stosh, I'll have the rent to you on the third like I said. 268 00:12:15,969 --> 00:12:17,470 We're still collecting club dues this week. 269 00:12:17,537 --> 00:12:19,672 Great, but not what I need. 270 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,741 Could use your help in the back. 271 00:12:26,780 --> 00:12:29,850 Jesus. What is this? 272 00:12:29,917 --> 00:12:31,618 -STOSH: Pyramid. -Uh-huh. 273 00:12:31,684 --> 00:12:35,188 Had themselves a misadventure on the wharf last night. 274 00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:37,791 I need my little backup stitcher. 275 00:12:37,858 --> 00:12:39,459 Hey, I am not your backup anything. 276 00:12:39,526 --> 00:12:40,527 You get that, right? 277 00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:43,330 I get that. Possessive pronoun, my mistake. 278 00:12:43,396 --> 00:12:47,200 Do this for me, no club dues this month. 279 00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,837 THUG: Everything we had, it just... 280 00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:52,172 it just bounced off the bastard. 281 00:12:52,239 --> 00:12:57,044 (chuckles): Like a... big... blue tank! 282 00:12:57,110 --> 00:12:59,146 DOT: Hey. Hey. 283 00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:00,480 Follow the light with your eyes. 284 00:13:00,547 --> 00:13:02,315 -(groans) -Okay? 285 00:13:02,382 --> 00:13:04,584 The Terror took... 286 00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:07,487 all of my favorite superheroes, 287 00:13:07,554 --> 00:13:11,524 and dropped them... 288 00:13:11,591 --> 00:13:14,227 right onto my dad. 289 00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:17,865 One second he was there, and then... 290 00:13:17,931 --> 00:13:20,000 the next second he wasn't. 291 00:13:20,067 --> 00:13:24,204 Your beloved progenitor murdered by your nemesis, 292 00:13:24,271 --> 00:13:27,374 right in front of your tiny little boy face? 293 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:28,876 Yeah. 294 00:13:28,942 --> 00:13:31,778 The world owes you a hug, small soldier, 295 00:13:31,845 --> 00:13:33,713 and I'm the one that's gonna give it. 296 00:13:33,780 --> 00:13:36,116 -Uh, no. -Oh, yes! 297 00:13:36,183 --> 00:13:38,618 -Tick... -(Tick groans loudly) 298 00:13:38,685 --> 00:13:41,521 -Okay, Tick. -That's it. 299 00:13:41,588 --> 00:13:43,656 This is the good stuff. 300 00:13:43,723 --> 00:13:45,792 The raw feed! 301 00:13:45,859 --> 00:13:46,994 ARTHUR: I'm breaking a little bit. 302 00:13:47,060 --> 00:13:48,361 TICK: Oh, yeah! 303 00:13:48,428 --> 00:13:49,863 -Just feel the hug. -Okay. 304 00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:51,364 Let yourself be hugged. 305 00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:54,134 Uh... Eh, but... that's it. Hug me back. 306 00:13:54,201 --> 00:13:55,502 -Yeah. -(groans) 307 00:13:55,568 --> 00:13:57,570 -But it's a little hard. I... -Hug it. 308 00:13:57,637 --> 00:13:58,771 (grunts) 309 00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:01,774 (both panting) 310 00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:03,977 Better? 311 00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:07,280 Yeah, that does feel... pretty good. 312 00:14:08,781 --> 00:14:10,717 -Does it? -(gasps) Well, don't... 313 00:14:10,783 --> 00:14:14,587 But... thank you, Tick. 314 00:14:14,654 --> 00:14:16,089 You're welcome. 315 00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:19,826 Don't you realize, Arthur, it's all starting to make sense. 316 00:14:19,893 --> 00:14:22,829 This is your life, your saga, 317 00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:24,197 your origin story. 318 00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:27,734 Arthur? 319 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:30,537 Look both ways. 320 00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:34,174 -(tires screeching) -Hey. Hey. Hello? Hi. 321 00:14:34,241 --> 00:14:36,910 I want to give it back. The suit. Please? 322 00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:38,078 You want to what? 323 00:14:38,145 --> 00:14:39,379 He wants to give it back. 324 00:14:40,547 --> 00:14:43,083 I think that's great. 325 00:14:43,150 --> 00:14:45,018 -Hop on in, little guy. -Okay. 326 00:14:45,085 --> 00:14:48,088 Great, could you please, uh... 327 00:14:48,155 --> 00:14:50,924 If you could not kill me, that would be awesome. 328 00:14:50,991 --> 00:14:52,425 We can call in and ask. 329 00:14:52,492 --> 00:14:55,428 Okay, well, that's something, I guess. 330 00:14:55,495 --> 00:14:57,931 (metal creaking) 331 00:14:57,998 --> 00:14:59,499 (thugs clamoring inside) 332 00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:02,302 (shouting) 333 00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:04,604 ARTHUR: Tick! Tick! Tick! 334 00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:06,039 Stop! I'm giving up! Okay? 335 00:15:06,106 --> 00:15:08,575 Not to this can of worms. 336 00:15:08,641 --> 00:15:09,576 ARTHUR: Don't. 337 00:15:09,642 --> 00:15:11,444 (metal scraping) 338 00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:14,314 (thugs screaming) 339 00:15:17,184 --> 00:15:18,718 (tires screeching) 340 00:15:18,785 --> 00:15:19,987 Huh. 341 00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:22,990 -(tires screeching) -You see, chum? 342 00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:24,257 We got crime on the run. 343 00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:26,593 Can't turn back, man. 344 00:15:26,659 --> 00:15:28,761 What the world needs now is us. 345 00:15:28,828 --> 00:15:30,597 Sweet us. 346 00:15:30,663 --> 00:15:33,500 -There is no us. -There's always been us, silly. 347 00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:36,336 Right from the beginning. Don't you remember? 348 00:15:36,403 --> 00:15:39,206 TICK: Arthur? Arthur? 349 00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:40,807 No, no! I started this. 350 00:15:40,873 --> 00:15:42,442 Okay? Alone. 351 00:15:42,509 --> 00:15:45,212 I-I opened the jar again, and the crazy came back out. 352 00:15:45,278 --> 00:15:47,080 -It was, it was me. -DOT: Arthur? 353 00:15:47,147 --> 00:15:48,548 Who are you talking to? 354 00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:50,317 No one. 355 00:15:50,383 --> 00:15:52,552 -Oh, God. -What? 356 00:15:52,619 --> 00:15:55,422 Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no, oh, no, oh, no. 357 00:15:55,488 --> 00:15:57,357 DOT: But, Arthur, you see things, remember, 358 00:15:57,424 --> 00:15:59,626 sometimes, things that aren't there? 359 00:15:59,692 --> 00:16:03,530 They're there one second, gone the next. 360 00:16:03,596 --> 00:16:04,897 We are not here to cause any trouble. 361 00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:06,099 What do you mean, "we"? 362 00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:07,567 TICK: You know me. 363 00:16:07,634 --> 00:16:09,569 I'm the you you always wanted to be. 364 00:16:09,636 --> 00:16:12,272 My life, nothing's making sense anymore. 365 00:16:12,339 --> 00:16:16,509 (kazoo playing gentle tune) 366 00:16:16,576 --> 00:16:18,945 DOT: Arthur. 367 00:16:19,012 --> 00:16:20,680 What are you wearing? 368 00:16:21,948 --> 00:16:23,550 Poncho. 369 00:16:23,616 --> 00:16:24,917 Are you okay? 370 00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:27,187 You have to call me back. Didn't you get my messages? 371 00:16:27,254 --> 00:16:29,189 Okay. Remember the drill? 372 00:16:29,256 --> 00:16:31,024 Right, the drill. Right, yeah. 373 00:16:31,091 --> 00:16:32,125 The drill. Normal is what normal does. 374 00:16:32,192 --> 00:16:33,826 Normal takes meds. 375 00:16:33,893 --> 00:16:35,928 Normal returns calls, 376 00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:38,298 dresses appropriately for the weather. 377 00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:40,200 Yeah, yeah, I just, I don't think the normal thing 378 00:16:40,267 --> 00:16:41,768 is really working right now. 379 00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:44,003 Okay. Well, we-we called you in a sick day, so just... 380 00:16:44,071 --> 00:16:45,505 you just need to rest. 381 00:16:45,572 --> 00:16:47,474 You're just riding out a little post-episode paranoia, 382 00:16:47,540 --> 00:16:49,376 right on schedule just-just like last time, remember? 383 00:16:49,442 --> 00:16:50,977 It's not like last time, okay? 384 00:16:51,044 --> 00:16:52,745 There's a, there's a giant blue guy 385 00:16:52,812 --> 00:16:55,248 and he's trying to fight crime, 386 00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:56,549 except he's not real! Or he's... 387 00:16:56,616 --> 00:16:58,451 (hyperventilating): I might be... I think I'm... 388 00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:00,387 Jesus, I'm the blue guy. I'm the blue guy. 389 00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:02,689 No. Arthur, you're not fighting anything. 390 00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:03,823 You're just a little unwell. 391 00:17:03,890 --> 00:17:05,092 (thudding footsteps approaching) 392 00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:06,459 Yeah, you're right. 393 00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:07,727 Arthur? 394 00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:09,996 Yeah, I just need to, I need to figure out 395 00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:11,698 where my mind is and it's all okay. 396 00:17:11,764 --> 00:17:13,032 You doing all right? 397 00:17:13,100 --> 00:17:15,568 Tick, she can't see you, okay? 398 00:17:15,635 --> 00:17:17,770 I can see him. 399 00:17:17,837 --> 00:17:19,206 Uh, yeah. 400 00:17:19,272 --> 00:17:21,774 What are... are you? 401 00:17:21,841 --> 00:17:22,875 I am The Tick. 402 00:17:22,942 --> 00:17:24,311 I am a superhero. 403 00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,813 I'll be defending the defenseless in the area 404 00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:28,014 henceforth. 405 00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:29,782 Huh. 406 00:17:29,849 --> 00:17:30,917 (cell phone buzzing) 407 00:17:30,983 --> 00:17:33,720 Okay. Um... just... 408 00:17:33,786 --> 00:17:35,588 Beck? Uh, yeah, I'll be there in ten minutes. 409 00:17:35,655 --> 00:17:36,889 Telephone call. 410 00:17:36,956 --> 00:17:38,158 So, you're real? 411 00:17:38,225 --> 00:17:40,093 Of course I'm real. Who's not real? 412 00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:41,328 DOT: I will meet you at dispatch, yes. 413 00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:44,397 Ten minutes, please. Thank you. 414 00:17:44,464 --> 00:17:47,167 So, uh, Dot, how do you know Arthur? 415 00:17:47,234 --> 00:17:48,768 Excuse me? 416 00:17:48,835 --> 00:17:51,638 Uh, D-Dot-Dot is my sister, actually, so we go way back. 417 00:17:51,704 --> 00:17:53,806 Uh, I do want to thank you for everything, 418 00:17:53,873 --> 00:17:55,142 helping me get home safely... 419 00:17:55,208 --> 00:17:56,709 -Oh. -...and the general protection 420 00:17:56,776 --> 00:18:00,413 of the innocent kind of thing, but, unfortunately, this is... 421 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,782 I got to say good-bye forever now. 422 00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,551 This is the end of our thing 423 00:18:04,617 --> 00:18:06,753 -and, uh, Dot, I-I... -"Good-bye forever"? 424 00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:08,488 I'm feeling much better now, actually, suddenly. 425 00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:09,989 So, I'm just gonna go upstairs, go straight into bed, 426 00:18:10,056 --> 00:18:11,891 so I would say you don't even need to worry about me. 427 00:18:11,958 --> 00:18:14,494 You should just go on to your shift and that I'm good. 428 00:18:14,561 --> 00:18:15,795 Are you sure? Because I can call in 429 00:18:15,862 --> 00:18:17,197 if you want me to come up with you. It's... 430 00:18:17,264 --> 00:18:18,798 No, no, no, no. I don't want you to do that. 431 00:18:18,865 --> 00:18:21,033 I want you to... I'd say get far away, like a safe distance away. 432 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:23,069 And I'm just gonna go straight up into bed and I'm g... 433 00:18:23,136 --> 00:18:24,404 I'm really, I'm very good. 434 00:18:24,471 --> 00:18:26,539 I'm very good, Dot. 435 00:18:33,146 --> 00:18:37,784 So, you're a... superhero? 436 00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:42,589 I... I'm sorry, I just need a minute. 437 00:18:48,428 --> 00:18:49,596 * You got to come original * 438 00:18:49,662 --> 00:18:51,063 * You got to come original * 439 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:53,466 -* All entertainers come original * -(beeping) 440 00:18:53,533 --> 00:18:55,402 * You got to come original * 441 00:18:55,468 --> 00:18:56,769 * You got to come original * 442 00:18:56,836 --> 00:18:58,104 * All entertainers * 443 00:18:58,171 --> 00:18:59,872 * Hear why, to come original... * 444 00:18:59,939 --> 00:19:01,674 (grunts) 445 00:19:01,741 --> 00:19:03,976 * You got to come full range an' * 446 00:19:04,043 --> 00:19:05,111 * Full range of emotion * 447 00:19:05,178 --> 00:19:06,279 * Full range of styles * 448 00:19:06,346 --> 00:19:07,747 * When you come to town * 449 00:19:07,814 --> 00:19:09,782 * You'll have them comin' for miles and * 450 00:19:09,849 --> 00:19:10,683 * Come original * 451 00:19:10,750 --> 00:19:12,151 * You got to come original * 452 00:19:12,219 --> 00:19:13,686 * All entertainers come original * 453 00:19:13,753 --> 00:19:15,188 * You got to come original * 454 00:19:15,255 --> 00:19:16,956 * You got to come original * 455 00:19:17,023 --> 00:19:18,258 * All entertainers * 456 00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:19,859 * Hear why * 457 00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:21,928 * Black Eyed Peas, they comin' full range and * 458 00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:24,731 * NOFX, they comin' full range and... * 459 00:19:24,797 --> 00:19:26,533 (music fades) 460 00:19:44,817 --> 00:19:46,553 (laughs) 461 00:19:46,619 --> 00:19:51,224 You handled this mission beautifully. 462 00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:53,926 I mean it. 463 00:19:53,993 --> 00:19:58,865 That kick-murder party you threw in Lima, perfect diversion. 464 00:19:58,931 --> 00:20:00,400 Those nuns had it coming. 465 00:20:00,467 --> 00:20:04,203 You're, uh... better than a Swiffer. 466 00:20:04,271 --> 00:20:08,841 Aren't you, Miss Lint? 467 00:20:08,908 --> 00:20:12,612 That's what the men call you, I'm told, behind your back. 468 00:20:12,679 --> 00:20:14,247 I know what they call me. 469 00:20:14,314 --> 00:20:18,951 Is that why you fried two of my flamethrower guys in the field? 470 00:20:19,018 --> 00:20:20,720 They weren't your best men. 471 00:20:20,787 --> 00:20:25,458 True. We don't put our best people on the flamethrowers. 472 00:20:25,525 --> 00:20:28,761 But a nickname shouldn't be costing me henchmen. 473 00:20:28,828 --> 00:20:30,430 You want my advice? 474 00:20:30,497 --> 00:20:35,001 You take that dumbass name and make it a strength! 475 00:20:35,067 --> 00:20:39,772 You don't kill people 'cause they call you names. 476 00:20:39,839 --> 00:20:42,975 You kill people because it's fun. 477 00:20:45,645 --> 00:20:48,014 Got you a little something. 478 00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:52,985 Had my science guys make it up. 479 00:20:53,052 --> 00:20:55,087 Cost a mint. 480 00:20:55,154 --> 00:20:58,224 Tuned specifically to your charge, 481 00:20:58,291 --> 00:21:02,562 they should ground you without weakening your attack. 482 00:21:02,629 --> 00:21:05,998 I... 483 00:21:06,065 --> 00:21:07,967 don't know what to say. 484 00:21:08,034 --> 00:21:11,170 You want to learn it all. 485 00:21:11,237 --> 00:21:13,640 I'm gonna teach you. 486 00:21:13,706 --> 00:21:17,877 But first, you need to be able to wear black. 487 00:21:30,490 --> 00:21:31,958 (quietly): Okay. 488 00:21:36,396 --> 00:21:38,831 -Aah! -You can't let your sister talk you into this normal thing. 489 00:21:38,898 --> 00:21:40,266 Please, just stay away from me, okay? 490 00:21:40,333 --> 00:21:41,401 Stay away from me. 491 00:21:41,468 --> 00:21:43,002 -Oh, come on, chum. -Chum? 492 00:21:43,069 --> 00:21:47,006 Chum is the meat that they chop up and throw to the sharks. 493 00:21:47,073 --> 00:21:50,176 And also a good, good friend. 494 00:21:50,242 --> 00:21:52,078 What's wrong with you? 495 00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:52,979 What is it? 496 00:21:53,045 --> 00:21:54,514 Are-are you dumb? Are you brain-injured? 497 00:21:54,581 --> 00:21:55,982 Did you escape from a mental hospital? What? 498 00:21:56,048 --> 00:21:58,351 What? I mean, because if you were a real superhero, 499 00:21:58,418 --> 00:22:00,787 you wouldn't spend a single moment with me. 500 00:22:00,853 --> 00:22:02,555 I'm a nobody. 501 00:22:02,622 --> 00:22:04,624 I'm a victim. I'm... 502 00:22:04,691 --> 00:22:07,860 I'm a bystander in a long line of bystanders. 503 00:22:07,927 --> 00:22:09,862 Arthur, you're hurting our feelings. 504 00:22:09,929 --> 00:22:12,832 I don't have any sort of special destiny, okay? 505 00:22:12,899 --> 00:22:16,636 Oh, but you do, and you're already at stage three. 506 00:22:16,703 --> 00:22:18,838 "The hero rejects the call." 507 00:22:18,905 --> 00:22:21,173 But destiny is on the line, Arthur, 508 00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:22,709 and she's calling collect. 509 00:22:22,775 --> 00:22:25,011 Accept the charges, Arthur. 510 00:22:25,077 --> 00:22:27,179 Accept them. 511 00:22:27,246 --> 00:22:29,549 You're crazy, Tick. 512 00:22:29,616 --> 00:22:30,950 You're the crazy one. 513 00:22:31,017 --> 00:22:34,487 Just leave me alone. You're crazy. 514 00:22:37,156 --> 00:22:39,459 TICK: The crosshairs of adversity 515 00:22:39,526 --> 00:22:41,694 fall on their hapless target. 516 00:22:41,761 --> 00:22:45,131 And even though our valiant fledgling has scored 517 00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:49,201 a cool, blue guide with a map and a compass and everything, 518 00:22:49,268 --> 00:22:53,473 he still must cross his first threshold alone. 519 00:22:53,540 --> 00:22:56,008 (engine revs) 520 00:22:58,878 --> 00:23:03,583 The story now rests on Arthur. 521 00:23:03,650 --> 00:23:08,688 Arthur and destiny. 522 00:23:09,556 --> 00:23:12,191 (mutters softly) 523 00:23:12,258 --> 00:23:14,126 (car doors opening, closing) 524 00:23:14,193 --> 00:23:15,595 Hey. Hey, guys. 525 00:23:15,662 --> 00:23:18,565 Uh, I'm sorry about the-the throwing stuff earlier. 526 00:23:18,631 --> 00:23:20,567 I really just want to give the suit back. 527 00:23:20,633 --> 00:23:22,368 Sure. We know. 528 00:23:22,435 --> 00:23:23,269 Oh, okay. 529 00:23:23,335 --> 00:23:26,172 -Great. -THUG: Who the hell are you supposed to be? 530 00:23:28,074 --> 00:23:30,142 (grunting) 531 00:23:32,344 --> 00:23:33,980 (Arthur gasps) 532 00:23:34,046 --> 00:23:36,082 (men grunting) 533 00:23:41,788 --> 00:23:42,889 (grunts) 534 00:23:42,955 --> 00:23:44,624 (body thuds) 535 00:23:47,527 --> 00:23:50,530 (thug cries out in pain) 536 00:23:50,597 --> 00:23:52,198 (deep voice): Take off the suit. 537 00:23:52,264 --> 00:23:53,332 Wh... okay. 538 00:23:53,399 --> 00:23:57,103 (sirens approaching) 539 00:23:57,169 --> 00:23:58,505 It might take a second. 540 00:23:58,571 --> 00:24:01,708 Just 'cause the zipper... 541 00:24:01,774 --> 00:24:03,275 (groans) 542 00:24:03,342 --> 00:24:05,177 Eat me. 543 00:24:05,244 --> 00:24:07,179 (grunts) 544 00:24:08,748 --> 00:24:10,750 -Get that helmet off. -ARTHUR: 28th Amendment! 545 00:24:10,817 --> 00:24:13,152 -I'm taking the 28th! -How's that? 546 00:24:13,219 --> 00:24:15,387 Murphy's Law, the 28th. I'm t... I'm taking the 28th. 547 00:24:15,454 --> 00:24:18,625 Jesus Chr... hey, dispatch. 548 00:24:18,691 --> 00:24:22,061 -We, uh... -(helicopter blades whirring) 549 00:24:22,128 --> 00:24:24,196 we got a superhero.