1
00:00:02,606 --> 00:00:05,609
So, Andi, maybe we should have dinner
on my new boat tonight.
2
00:00:05,693 --> 00:00:08,279
I worry she feels lonely
out there in the driveway.
3
00:00:10,031 --> 00:00:12,700
Adam, a boat doesn't have feelings.
It's a boat.
4
00:00:14,535 --> 00:00:17,121
That's not very nice.
She never says anything bad about you.
5
00:00:18,372 --> 00:00:20,916
Hey, Mom. Could you drop me
at the mall after school?
6
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:22,793
I picked up an extra shift at the store.
7
00:00:22,877 --> 00:00:25,087
Aw, of course I can,
my little working girl.
8
00:00:25,171 --> 00:00:26,213
[chuckles]
9
00:00:27,673 --> 00:00:30,051
Maybe we don't call our daughter
a working girl.
10
00:00:31,677 --> 00:00:34,346
I am so proud of you for getting this job.
11
00:00:34,972 --> 00:00:36,515
-You made me do it.
-Yeah.
12
00:00:37,141 --> 00:00:40,936
You know, this job is gonna look great
on your college applications.
13
00:00:41,020 --> 00:00:42,396
So you can thank me now
14
00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:45,065
or when you're accepting your Nobel Prize,
your choice.
15
00:00:46,567 --> 00:00:47,651
Thank you, Mom.
16
00:00:48,819 --> 00:00:50,529
I am so excited for her.
17
00:00:50,613 --> 00:00:52,114
Yeah, you know who I'm excited for?
18
00:00:52,198 --> 00:00:53,282
Me. I have a boat.
19
00:00:54,533 --> 00:00:56,660
I'm gonna go spend some time
with her before work.
20
00:00:56,744 --> 00:00:59,246
Wait, you're just gonna go sit on it
alone in the driveway?
21
00:00:59,830 --> 00:01:01,499
Yeah, so the neighbors see me.
22
00:01:02,458 --> 00:01:05,461
You thought you were the coolest guy
in the neighborhood, Dune Buggy Steve?
23
00:01:05,544 --> 00:01:06,712
Not anymore!
24
00:01:10,216 --> 00:01:11,300
Hey, Teddy.
25
00:01:11,383 --> 00:01:13,219
How's it feel to be
the son of a boat owner?
26
00:01:13,302 --> 00:01:14,720
No, thanks, I'm not hungry.
27
00:01:19,225 --> 00:01:21,685
What? Where's my boat?
28
00:01:23,562 --> 00:01:25,481
What? Oh!
29
00:01:25,564 --> 00:01:26,690
Oh!
30
00:01:28,442 --> 00:01:29,568
Oh!
31
00:01:30,402 --> 00:01:31,570
Oh!
32
00:01:32,196 --> 00:01:34,865
Teddy, she's gone!
33
00:01:34,949 --> 00:01:36,534
Fine, I'll have a bagel.
34
00:01:36,617 --> 00:01:37,827
[splutters]
35
00:01:42,665 --> 00:01:45,751
-What?
-My boat is gone, Andi! I can't find it!
36
00:01:49,755 --> 00:01:51,590
-Andi, we're running!
-Oh!
37
00:01:55,136 --> 00:01:56,971
Look, Andi, no boat!
38
00:02:01,308 --> 00:02:02,309
What about that boat?
39
00:02:05,020 --> 00:02:06,105
What?
40
00:02:08,399 --> 00:02:09,567
But it was gone.
41
00:02:12,319 --> 00:02:13,612
And now it's here.
42
00:02:15,531 --> 00:02:17,324
What's happening? Something's happening.
43
00:02:18,826 --> 00:02:20,452
Something seems to be happening to you.
44
00:02:20,536 --> 00:02:23,122
Teddy was here. He'll tell you.
45
00:02:23,205 --> 00:02:24,999
Teddy, did you see who took the boat?
46
00:02:25,583 --> 00:02:26,625
The boat's right there.
47
00:02:29,795 --> 00:02:32,006
I'll bet you Dune Buggy Steve's kid
saw something!
48
00:02:33,591 --> 00:02:35,926
[theme music playing]
49
00:02:43,809 --> 00:02:45,144
Hey, Lowell.
50
00:02:45,227 --> 00:02:46,228
Where's Don?
51
00:02:46,312 --> 00:02:47,688
He took your dad to Happy Burger.
52
00:02:47,771 --> 00:02:49,189
Again?
53
00:02:49,273 --> 00:02:52,276
He said he wanted to share
the best burger in the world with family.
54
00:02:52,359 --> 00:02:55,029
But I'm in that family.
Why didn't they invite me?
55
00:02:55,821 --> 00:02:57,114
You don't want any part of that.
56
00:02:57,197 --> 00:03:00,034
It's 9:00 in the morning.
Who eats burgers for breakfast?
57
00:03:00,117 --> 00:03:03,662
Yeah, after Don started eating ice cream
sandwiches as regular sandwiches,
58
00:03:03,746 --> 00:03:05,039
there were no more rules.
59
00:03:05,664 --> 00:03:06,999
Listen, I got a problem.
60
00:03:07,082 --> 00:03:10,336
Someone took my boat last night,
and then they brought it back.
61
00:03:10,419 --> 00:03:12,671
-Whoa, that's weird.
-Yeah.
62
00:03:12,755 --> 00:03:14,840
Maybe it's not such a big deal
since it's home again.
63
00:03:14,924 --> 00:03:17,843
Well, it is a big deal. I feel violated.
64
00:03:17,927 --> 00:03:20,554
Imagine if someone came to your house
and took something you loved.
65
00:03:20,638 --> 00:03:22,890
Someone did. He took my wife.
66
00:03:23,849 --> 00:03:24,850
Yes.
67
00:03:24,934 --> 00:03:27,394
Now, imagine if your wife
was as fun as a boat.
68
00:03:28,771 --> 00:03:30,064
I gotta figure out who did this.
69
00:03:30,147 --> 00:03:32,483
Well, I'd be happy to help.
I love a good mystery.
70
00:03:32,566 --> 00:03:34,485
After my divorce, I was alone so much,
71
00:03:34,568 --> 00:03:37,029
I watched every episode
of Murder, She Wrote.
72
00:03:38,030 --> 00:03:40,908
Lowell, please,
I am depressed enough as it is.
73
00:03:41,533 --> 00:03:44,912
Don't be. With your good looks
and my hours of lonely research,
74
00:03:44,995 --> 00:03:46,956
there's no mystery we can't solve.
75
00:03:48,082 --> 00:03:50,960
Come on, Detective Handsome.
Let's crack this case.
76
00:03:53,295 --> 00:03:54,338
Solid nickname.
77
00:03:59,551 --> 00:04:01,178
Hold on, Lowell. Check this out.
78
00:04:01,262 --> 00:04:02,388
It's a hat.
79
00:04:02,471 --> 00:04:03,472
I can do better.
80
00:04:03,555 --> 00:04:04,723
It's a hat!
81
00:04:06,642 --> 00:04:08,435
This is my dad's hat.
82
00:04:08,519 --> 00:04:10,938
Oh, so your dad took your boat.
83
00:04:11,021 --> 00:04:12,273
It makes perfect sense.
84
00:04:12,356 --> 00:04:14,650
-My dad loves night fishing.
-There's your motive.
85
00:04:14,733 --> 00:04:16,902
Yeah, I just need
to make sure this is his.
86
00:04:16,986 --> 00:04:18,570
I can't accuse him without proof.
87
00:04:18,654 --> 00:04:21,073
But he is definitely suspect number one.
88
00:04:21,156 --> 00:04:24,201
I think what you mean is,
when it comes to suspects,
89
00:04:24,285 --> 00:04:28,789
it looks like your dad
just threw his hat into the ring.
90
00:04:31,333 --> 00:04:33,836
Okay, if we're gonna be partners,
you can't say stuff like that.
91
00:04:37,631 --> 00:04:40,301
All right, no one's home.
I'm gonna check if my dad's hat is here.
92
00:04:40,384 --> 00:04:42,845
If it's not, we'll have proof
he's the boat thief.
93
00:04:42,928 --> 00:04:45,472
Oh, look at this.
94
00:04:45,556 --> 00:04:48,392
My dad and Don at a Steelers game. Jeez.
95
00:04:49,310 --> 00:04:50,436
Wait a minute.
96
00:04:51,145 --> 00:04:52,313
I was in this picture.
97
00:04:52,396 --> 00:04:54,231
[gasps] That's my arm!
98
00:04:54,315 --> 00:04:55,733
They cropped me out!
99
00:04:56,775 --> 00:04:58,110
And you were in the middle.
100
00:04:58,193 --> 00:05:00,571
That's hard to do. This was no accident.
101
00:05:02,740 --> 00:05:04,700
Lowell, the hat's not here.
102
00:05:04,783 --> 00:05:07,911
Which means this is my dad's hat,
which means we got him.
103
00:05:12,624 --> 00:05:14,126
What are we doing, boys?
104
00:05:14,835 --> 00:05:17,546
All right, we're here because
someone took my boat out,
105
00:05:17,629 --> 00:05:19,590
and I thought it was you
because I found your hat.
106
00:05:19,673 --> 00:05:23,635
But now you're wearing it,
which means this is bigger than I thought.
107
00:05:24,178 --> 00:05:25,679
Or smaller.
108
00:05:25,763 --> 00:05:26,764
Or the same.
109
00:05:27,431 --> 00:05:29,224
I didn't take your boat.
110
00:05:29,308 --> 00:05:31,560
If I wanted to use it,
I'd make you hitch it up,
111
00:05:31,643 --> 00:05:33,896
drive me to the lake,
and pay for everything.
112
00:05:35,481 --> 00:05:37,399
Yeah, that sounds right to me.
113
00:05:38,525 --> 00:05:39,902
So whose hat is this?
114
00:05:39,985 --> 00:05:42,112
A tale of two hats.
115
00:05:42,196 --> 00:05:44,782
That's what they would call the episode
if it was Murder, She Wrote.
116
00:05:45,741 --> 00:05:46,867
Great show.
117
00:05:46,950 --> 00:05:49,369
I love a foxy, young detective.
118
00:05:52,873 --> 00:05:53,957
Hey.
119
00:05:54,041 --> 00:05:56,168
Mom? What are you doing here?
You just dropped me off.
120
00:05:56,251 --> 00:05:59,505
Don't think of me as Mom,
just think of me as a random customer
121
00:05:59,588 --> 00:06:02,007
who's here to take pictures of you
she can post on Facebook.
122
00:06:02,716 --> 00:06:05,177
Ooh, pretend like you're saying
something into your headset.
123
00:06:05,260 --> 00:06:07,846
Security, we've got a crazy mom
in junior accessories.
124
00:06:07,930 --> 00:06:09,139
Ah!
125
00:06:09,223 --> 00:06:11,683
Ma'am, can I help you find something?
126
00:06:11,767 --> 00:06:13,477
Like a store that's more age-appropriate?
127
00:06:15,312 --> 00:06:16,396
Excuse me?
128
00:06:16,855 --> 00:06:18,649
Mom, this is my boss, Karen.
129
00:06:19,149 --> 00:06:21,902
Oh! Well, then, no, thank you.
130
00:06:21,985 --> 00:06:25,030
I am already being helped
by the best salesperson ever
131
00:06:25,614 --> 00:06:27,825
who said I'm the perfect age
for this store.
132
00:06:30,661 --> 00:06:32,204
So how's your shift going?
133
00:06:32,287 --> 00:06:34,248
Oh, you are not gonna believe
what happened.
134
00:06:34,331 --> 00:06:36,166
Karen told me if I keep up the good work,
135
00:06:36,250 --> 00:06:38,335
I could be assistant manager in a year.
136
00:06:38,418 --> 00:06:40,712
Oh. Okay, but in a year,
137
00:06:40,796 --> 00:06:42,714
you're gonna be getting ready
to go to college.
138
00:06:43,382 --> 00:06:44,466
Or will I?
139
00:06:45,592 --> 00:06:47,636
See, normally people go
to college to get a job,
140
00:06:47,719 --> 00:06:49,596
but I already have one,
so I don't need college.
141
00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:52,641
Oh, bonus, I won't have
to take the SATs next week.
142
00:06:52,724 --> 00:06:55,018
Looks like someone gets
to sleep in on Saturday.
143
00:06:56,645 --> 00:06:59,648
But-- But-- But what about your future?
144
00:06:59,731 --> 00:07:02,568
Huh? I mean, this job
isn't gonna pay you enough to...
145
00:07:02,651 --> 00:07:04,361
I don't know, buy a house, huh?
146
00:07:04,444 --> 00:07:06,905
I mean, where are you
gonna raise your kids?
147
00:07:06,989 --> 00:07:09,032
Relax, I have a plan.
148
00:07:09,116 --> 00:07:11,577
You give me the money you were
gonna give me to go to college.
149
00:07:11,660 --> 00:07:12,953
I'll use that to buy a house.
150
00:07:13,036 --> 00:07:16,248
That's college-level thinking
without college-level work.
151
00:07:17,583 --> 00:07:19,626
On second thought,
maybe you don't want kids.
152
00:07:19,710 --> 00:07:21,044
They're too stressful.
153
00:07:22,671 --> 00:07:25,340
Okay, so it's not my dad.
Did you see anything else up there?
154
00:07:25,424 --> 00:07:29,720
I found a gray hair that seemed promising,
but then I remembered.
155
00:07:35,934 --> 00:07:37,102
Remembered what?
156
00:07:39,313 --> 00:07:40,647
Well, you know...
157
00:07:42,983 --> 00:07:46,653
What I know is, the most
majestic mountains are covered in snow.
158
00:07:48,614 --> 00:07:50,657
And that this thing did me no good.
159
00:07:52,493 --> 00:07:53,702
Hey!
160
00:07:53,785 --> 00:07:54,995
-Look at this.
-Don't eat that.
161
00:07:55,078 --> 00:07:56,997
-It's covered in germs.
-What?
162
00:07:57,080 --> 00:07:59,666
No, this is from Happy Burger.
163
00:07:59,750 --> 00:08:00,918
Don's favorite place.
164
00:08:01,793 --> 00:08:03,629
In my trash, next to my boat.
165
00:08:03,712 --> 00:08:05,547
Case closed, we got him.
166
00:08:06,840 --> 00:08:07,925
Oh.
167
00:08:09,134 --> 00:08:10,719
Don, there you are.
168
00:08:10,802 --> 00:08:12,763
Look what I found
in the trash next to my boat.
169
00:08:12,846 --> 00:08:13,972
A Happy Burger wrapper!
170
00:08:16,517 --> 00:08:17,559
So you know.
171
00:08:17,643 --> 00:08:20,062
I know everything. [chuckles]
172
00:08:20,145 --> 00:08:21,855
Fine, I admit it.
173
00:08:21,939 --> 00:08:25,275
Sometimes in the afternoon,
I leave work and take a nap in your bed.
174
00:08:27,319 --> 00:08:28,320
You what?
175
00:08:29,363 --> 00:08:31,615
And usually on the way,
I pick up a burger.
176
00:08:31,698 --> 00:08:33,825
They're delicious,
and they make me sleepy.
177
00:08:35,035 --> 00:08:37,579
I'm talking about
you snuck my boat out last night.
178
00:08:37,663 --> 00:08:39,957
I would never do that.
I'm not a boat-stealer.
179
00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:42,668
I'm a sneaky sleeper.
That's the worst you can pin on me.
180
00:08:43,168 --> 00:08:44,962
Give it up, Don. I know you took it.
181
00:08:45,045 --> 00:08:46,547
I didn't do it.
182
00:08:46,630 --> 00:08:47,965
If you don't believe me, ask Dad.
183
00:08:48,048 --> 00:08:49,341
What does Dad know about it?
184
00:08:49,424 --> 00:08:51,927
We were up late last night
watching kung fu movies together.
185
00:08:52,010 --> 00:08:54,471
-Well...
-Now, if you'll excuse me,
186
00:08:54,555 --> 00:08:57,307
this conversation has made me very sleepy.
187
00:08:57,933 --> 00:08:58,976
You know where to find me.
188
00:09:02,521 --> 00:09:04,189
So your dad's his alibi.
189
00:09:04,273 --> 00:09:06,733
Well, of course he is.
They're always together.
190
00:09:06,817 --> 00:09:08,151
[scoffs]
191
00:09:09,278 --> 00:09:10,279
Wait a minute.
192
00:09:10,946 --> 00:09:12,906
Do you think they took your boat together?
193
00:09:15,033 --> 00:09:16,660
That would make sense.
194
00:09:16,743 --> 00:09:18,954
Yeah, Dad doesn't want
to do the work, but Don will.
195
00:09:19,037 --> 00:09:21,957
And Don doesn't know how to do the work,
but Dad can tell him.
196
00:09:22,040 --> 00:09:24,793
Together they make one
boat-stealing, burger-eating,
197
00:09:24,876 --> 00:09:26,253
kung-fu-watching criminal!
198
00:09:27,879 --> 00:09:29,339
So we finally cracked the case.
199
00:09:29,423 --> 00:09:31,174
They were in on it together.
200
00:09:31,258 --> 00:09:34,761
It figures. You know, this is just
another thing they're doing without me.
201
00:09:34,845 --> 00:09:37,306
[scoffs] And that's why there's two hats.
202
00:09:37,389 --> 00:09:40,058
One for Dad and one for his favorite son.
203
00:09:40,142 --> 00:09:42,894
Boy, I gotta tell you, Lowell.
This really hurts.
204
00:09:42,978 --> 00:09:45,897
We could get matching hats
if that would make you feel better.
205
00:09:48,191 --> 00:09:49,693
It might make me feel worse.
206
00:09:50,444 --> 00:09:51,862
Buy 'em anyway, though. We'll see.
207
00:09:59,411 --> 00:10:00,495
What are you doing?
208
00:10:00,579 --> 00:10:02,539
I'm cutting my dad and Don
out of family photos.
209
00:10:02,623 --> 00:10:03,707
What are you doing?
210
00:10:07,210 --> 00:10:08,795
Well, that's from Don's wedding.
211
00:10:08,879 --> 00:10:11,006
So now it just looks like
you married Marcy.
212
00:10:12,924 --> 00:10:15,093
She wishes. [laughs]
213
00:10:16,386 --> 00:10:21,433
My dad and Don have found a new
and even more hurtful way of excluding me.
214
00:10:21,516 --> 00:10:24,436
They're the ones
that took my boat out last night.
215
00:10:24,519 --> 00:10:27,064
Without me. My boat, no me.
216
00:10:28,732 --> 00:10:30,442
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.
217
00:10:30,525 --> 00:10:33,862
Yeah. I'm just sick
of their fun little club for two.
218
00:10:33,945 --> 00:10:36,156
It's so-- it's stupid,
and I don't even want to be in it,
219
00:10:36,239 --> 00:10:38,241
but I want to be in it so bad.
220
00:10:39,201 --> 00:10:40,202
[exhales]
221
00:10:40,285 --> 00:10:43,955
Well, I know this isn't a great time,
but I have more bad news.
222
00:10:44,748 --> 00:10:46,583
Kate doesn't want to go to college.
223
00:10:47,250 --> 00:10:50,003
What? Where did that come from?
224
00:10:50,087 --> 00:10:53,465
Well, she has a job now,
so she says she doesn't need college.
225
00:10:53,548 --> 00:10:55,384
She made the whole decision without me.
226
00:10:55,467 --> 00:10:58,220
I gave her confidence,
and then she uses it against me.
227
00:10:59,346 --> 00:11:00,764
That's what family does.
228
00:11:00,847 --> 00:11:02,182
They hurt us, Andi.
229
00:11:03,058 --> 00:11:04,768
You know what? You shouldn't stand for it.
230
00:11:04,851 --> 00:11:07,896
You're a great son and a great brother,
and you deserve better.
231
00:11:07,979 --> 00:11:10,190
Well, you're a great mom
and you deserve better.
232
00:11:11,108 --> 00:11:13,985
Wait a minute.
Why are we taking this lying down?
233
00:11:14,069 --> 00:11:15,529
Yeah.
234
00:11:15,612 --> 00:11:17,197
What are we, doormats?
235
00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:19,449
No. We are not doormats. We are...
236
00:11:19,533 --> 00:11:21,618
What's the opposite of doormats?
237
00:11:22,619 --> 00:11:24,204
-Doors?
-That's right. We're doors.
238
00:11:24,955 --> 00:11:27,374
Yeah. And we're sturdy.
239
00:11:27,457 --> 00:11:30,585
And if you want to get anywhere,
you gotta come through us.
240
00:11:31,795 --> 00:11:33,588
-[chuckles]
-Yeah, but be careful,
241
00:11:33,672 --> 00:11:34,881
or we'll slam your fingers.
242
00:11:34,965 --> 00:11:37,217
That's right, honey. (mutters)
243
00:11:37,300 --> 00:11:39,886
-Yeah. Okay. Let's go slam some fingers!
-Yes.
244
00:11:42,055 --> 00:11:43,932
Dad? I want to talk to you-- Oh.
245
00:11:44,558 --> 00:11:45,851
Of course, you're together.
246
00:11:45,934 --> 00:11:47,394
We're watching Finding Bigfoot.
247
00:11:47,477 --> 00:11:49,438
So far, nothing.
248
00:11:50,272 --> 00:11:53,066
But that's my favorite show,
and I always have to watch it alone.
249
00:11:53,150 --> 00:11:54,693
You know, one day they'll find him,
250
00:11:54,776 --> 00:11:56,820
and I won't have anybody
to celebrate with.
251
00:11:57,529 --> 00:11:59,531
What's wrong, boy?
You got a burr in your butt?
252
00:11:59,614 --> 00:12:02,242
I'll tell you what's in my butt,
the two of you.
253
00:12:03,660 --> 00:12:05,537
I know you took my boat out last night,
254
00:12:05,620 --> 00:12:08,457
and I know you got matching blue hats
to wear when you did it.
255
00:12:08,540 --> 00:12:09,958
Because you exclude me.
256
00:12:10,041 --> 00:12:12,002
-We don't exclude you.
-Yeah, you do.
257
00:12:12,085 --> 00:12:14,880
And I'm not gonna take it anymore,
because I am a door.
258
00:12:16,256 --> 00:12:17,466
Someone's at the door?
259
00:12:18,967 --> 00:12:21,011
I mean, look at this picture.
260
00:12:21,094 --> 00:12:23,221
Huh? You cropped me out.
261
00:12:23,305 --> 00:12:26,475
Look. Cropped: to exclude.
262
00:12:26,558 --> 00:12:28,059
I've never seen that before.
263
00:12:28,143 --> 00:12:30,228
Yeah, right. You know what?
264
00:12:30,312 --> 00:12:32,772
From now on,
I am excluding the two of you.
265
00:12:32,856 --> 00:12:35,525
So when you don't call,
I won't be available.
266
00:12:38,445 --> 00:12:39,946
What was that about?
267
00:12:40,572 --> 00:12:43,074
I think he's mad
because I sleep in his bed sometimes.
268
00:12:47,329 --> 00:12:48,788
Oh, good. You're back.
269
00:12:49,706 --> 00:12:52,167
That's right.
'Cause you're quitting this job.
270
00:12:52,876 --> 00:12:54,503
-No, I'm not.
-Yes, you are.
271
00:12:55,378 --> 00:12:56,379
No, I'm not.
272
00:12:56,463 --> 00:13:00,175
Attention! I, Kate Burns, hereby quit
this job because I have to go to college.
273
00:13:00,258 --> 00:13:03,386
Ha! It's official.
That's a verbal contract.
274
00:13:05,263 --> 00:13:06,806
Look, Kate,
275
00:13:06,890 --> 00:13:10,101
I just want you to understand
that the world is tough, all right?
276
00:13:10,185 --> 00:13:12,354
You need to give yourself every advantage.
277
00:13:12,437 --> 00:13:14,272
I mean, look, this might not last.
278
00:13:14,356 --> 00:13:16,191
Stores close, Karens get fired,
279
00:13:16,274 --> 00:13:17,400
I hope.
280
00:13:18,485 --> 00:13:21,404
Look, just keep your options open.
281
00:13:21,488 --> 00:13:24,574
Mom, you need to leave.
You're making a scene.
282
00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:27,577
I know how to handle this.
I see it all the time.
283
00:13:27,661 --> 00:13:30,497
Senior women get mad
about the cute clothes we have.
284
00:13:30,580 --> 00:13:34,459
Back off, Karen.
You know, you, you are a bad influence.
285
00:13:34,543 --> 00:13:37,754
How dare you see potential in my daughter?
286
00:13:38,505 --> 00:13:41,466
Ma'am, you're causing a disturbance,
and I called security.
287
00:13:41,550 --> 00:13:43,760
They'll be here as soon
as their Segway's done charging.
288
00:13:44,636 --> 00:13:46,179
Mom, I've made my decision,
289
00:13:46,263 --> 00:13:48,974
and all your yelling is just
convincing me even more that I'm right.
290
00:13:49,057 --> 00:13:50,559
So please just go.
291
00:13:50,642 --> 00:13:52,936
Fine. I'll go.
292
00:13:53,019 --> 00:13:55,397
But I will leave you
with this final thought.
293
00:14:01,027 --> 00:14:02,279
Little something for you.
294
00:14:06,199 --> 00:14:09,536
Don and my dad acted like they
didn't even know what I was talking about.
295
00:14:09,619 --> 00:14:13,707
I just have to accept the fact
that I am an outsider in my own family.
296
00:14:13,790 --> 00:14:16,084
-Oh, honey, that's not true.
-Okay, Andi,
297
00:14:16,167 --> 00:14:19,254
the only proof I exist
is a picture of my arm.
298
00:14:21,464 --> 00:14:24,092
I mean, even bigfoot has
pictures of his whole body.
299
00:14:26,595 --> 00:14:29,139
You know that's just
a guy in a furry suit.
300
00:14:30,974 --> 00:14:33,476
Don't do this to me tonight, Andi.
301
00:14:34,644 --> 00:14:35,645
I am on edge.
302
00:14:35,729 --> 00:14:37,606
Yeah, well, I'm on edge, too.
303
00:14:37,689 --> 00:14:40,901
Our daughter still isn't going to college.
She won't even take the SATs.
304
00:14:41,651 --> 00:14:45,322
And me freaking out
just made Kate dig her heels in even more.
305
00:14:45,405 --> 00:14:47,365
I think I really screwed this up.
306
00:14:48,325 --> 00:14:49,659
You want me to talk to her?
307
00:14:49,743 --> 00:14:53,538
No, thanks.
I started this, and I'm gonna finish it.
308
00:14:53,622 --> 00:14:57,042
Okay. Well, just know
that I'm here for you.
309
00:14:57,125 --> 00:14:58,293
Hmm? Come here.
310
00:14:58,376 --> 00:14:59,836
-Aw.
-Come on.
311
00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:01,129
You're sweet.
312
00:15:01,963 --> 00:15:04,549
[engine revving]
313
00:15:04,633 --> 00:15:06,718
Get off me! They're taking my boat again!
314
00:15:10,388 --> 00:15:12,098
Ha! I got you!
315
00:15:17,312 --> 00:15:19,314
-Lowell?
-You caught me.
316
00:15:19,397 --> 00:15:20,857
Inside.
317
00:15:21,524 --> 00:15:22,734
I don't even know what to say.
318
00:15:22,817 --> 00:15:25,904
We were together all day
trying to figure out who took my boat.
319
00:15:25,987 --> 00:15:27,656
I know, it was so fun.
320
00:15:29,824 --> 00:15:31,910
Apart from the crippling guilt.
321
00:15:32,744 --> 00:15:34,412
What were you thinking?
322
00:15:34,496 --> 00:15:36,164
I've just been so lonely.
323
00:15:36,247 --> 00:15:37,874
Then buy your own boat.
324
00:15:39,751 --> 00:15:41,336
No, please, listen.
325
00:15:41,419 --> 00:15:45,006
Last week, I met this amazing
woman who was into boats,
326
00:15:45,090 --> 00:15:48,009
so to make her like me,
I told her I had a boat.
327
00:15:48,093 --> 00:15:50,971
Then last night I invited her over
to see my boat,
328
00:15:51,054 --> 00:15:54,307
at which point I needed a boat.
329
00:15:55,725 --> 00:15:59,145
Look, I'm not proud of what I did,
but I was desperate.
330
00:15:59,229 --> 00:16:01,982
And to think I almost wore
matching hats with you.
331
00:16:03,984 --> 00:16:05,694
-I'm so sorry.
-Are you?
332
00:16:06,403 --> 00:16:09,155
If you're so sorry, then why
are you here trying to steal it again?
333
00:16:10,156 --> 00:16:12,784
Because tonight she surprised me
with a booty call.
334
00:16:12,867 --> 00:16:15,120
I knew I couldn't get the booty
without the boat.
335
00:16:15,203 --> 00:16:17,330
So I told her I loaned it to you.
336
00:16:20,125 --> 00:16:22,585
You saw how upset I was
about my dad and my brother,
337
00:16:22,669 --> 00:16:24,045
and you still didn't say anything!
338
00:16:25,005 --> 00:16:27,507
You know what that is, Lowell?
That is unforgivable.
339
00:16:27,590 --> 00:16:30,593
Lowell, I'm getting lonely out here.
340
00:16:32,637 --> 00:16:34,639
Thanks for letting me borrow your boat.
341
00:16:52,365 --> 00:16:53,366
Morning, honey.
342
00:16:53,908 --> 00:16:54,909
Hey, Mom.
343
00:16:55,827 --> 00:16:59,706
Listen, I owe you an apology.
344
00:16:59,789 --> 00:17:03,293
I've been putting too much pressure
on you about college.
345
00:17:03,376 --> 00:17:06,796
That became clear to me
when mall security followed me to my car.
346
00:17:09,132 --> 00:17:10,300
So... [sighs]
347
00:17:10,383 --> 00:17:14,554
I'm just gonna say I believe in you,
and I support you no matter what.
348
00:17:15,972 --> 00:17:17,390
That means a lot, Mom.
349
00:17:18,391 --> 00:17:19,851
And I thought about what you said.
350
00:17:20,769 --> 00:17:23,730
At first, I was really mad
that you embarrassed me.
351
00:17:23,813 --> 00:17:26,608
But then I thought you wouldn't
have made such a big deal
352
00:17:26,691 --> 00:17:27,817
if it wasn't important.
353
00:17:29,194 --> 00:17:32,614
Anyway, can you give me a ride
to the SATs Saturday?
354
00:17:34,115 --> 00:17:35,116
You're going?
355
00:17:37,118 --> 00:17:39,913
Don't get too excited.
I'm just keeping my options open.
356
00:17:39,996 --> 00:17:41,664
Too late, I'm excited.
357
00:17:43,041 --> 00:17:44,334
Hugging is coming.
358
00:17:46,127 --> 00:17:50,090
-Mom.
-I feel the hug train leaving the station.
359
00:17:50,173 --> 00:17:51,674
[imitates train chugging]
360
00:17:55,804 --> 00:17:58,640
Please, please don't do the train thing.
361
00:17:59,808 --> 00:18:01,559
-All aboard!
-[groans]
362
00:18:01,643 --> 00:18:02,977
Hug, hug!
363
00:18:03,061 --> 00:18:05,063
[laughs]
364
00:18:05,146 --> 00:18:07,524
Okay, but you can't come
to my work anymore.
365
00:18:07,607 --> 00:18:09,400
-Deal.
-No, really.
366
00:18:09,484 --> 00:18:11,528
-There's a letter from security.
-What?
367
00:18:15,949 --> 00:18:19,202
"Dark hair, belligerent, mid-30s."
368
00:18:19,285 --> 00:18:20,662
Mid-30. Mid...
369
00:18:20,745 --> 00:18:21,913
[muttering]
370
00:18:25,416 --> 00:18:26,417
I'm gonna frame this.
371
00:18:30,463 --> 00:18:31,840
Lowell took your boat?
372
00:18:31,923 --> 00:18:35,927
Yeah, so, I'm sorry I accused you of that.
373
00:18:38,346 --> 00:18:41,724
And now is when you apologize
for always excluding me.
374
00:18:43,184 --> 00:18:45,353
Dad and I have to have
a private meeting about that.
375
00:18:45,436 --> 00:18:47,021
Can you give us a couple minutes alone?
376
00:18:47,772 --> 00:18:49,274
Don, cut it out.
377
00:18:49,983 --> 00:18:52,694
Look, maybe Don and I
hang out more than you,
378
00:18:52,777 --> 00:18:54,654
but we don't mean anything by it.
379
00:18:54,737 --> 00:18:57,157
Well, what about that picture
you cropped me out of?
380
00:18:57,240 --> 00:19:00,076
According to that, you have
one son with three arms.
381
00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:03,496
I did that. I put it on Dad's shelf
a month ago as a joke.
382
00:19:03,580 --> 00:19:04,998
There's another one in your wallet.
383
00:19:05,081 --> 00:19:07,167
Shows you how little
you pick up a check, by the way.
384
00:19:08,126 --> 00:19:09,794
Fine, forget the picture.
385
00:19:09,878 --> 00:19:12,463
But Dad, you're always inviting
Don over here to do stuff.
386
00:19:12,547 --> 00:19:14,716
I don't invite him. He's just always here.
387
00:19:14,799 --> 00:19:16,634
He's like a cat I fed one time.
388
00:19:18,553 --> 00:19:20,638
Well, then I'll just stay, too.
389
00:19:23,933 --> 00:19:26,269
Yeah. Huh.
390
00:19:36,821 --> 00:19:39,824
Don, give Adam your snacks.
391
00:19:41,910 --> 00:19:44,829
But I invented these.
It's Tater Tots with cheese and hot sauce.
392
00:19:44,913 --> 00:19:46,414
I call 'em Tater Dons.
393
00:19:47,081 --> 00:19:48,124
Hand 'em over, Donny.
394
00:19:52,670 --> 00:19:56,591
Yeah. This is nice,
the three of us hanging out together.
395
00:19:56,674 --> 00:19:58,927
-Yeah. We're family.
-[chuckles]
396
00:19:59,010 --> 00:20:00,470
You want a beer, son?
397
00:20:01,471 --> 00:20:03,056
I would love one, Dad.
398
00:20:03,139 --> 00:20:04,807
Grab three while you're up.
399
00:20:08,686 --> 00:20:09,812
You know, I was thinking,
400
00:20:09,896 --> 00:20:13,274
I'm not sure the opposite
of doormat is door.
401
00:20:15,610 --> 00:20:18,863
The point is, it worked. Okay?
You got Katie back on board with college.
402
00:20:18,947 --> 00:20:20,990
Yeah. And you figured out
who took your boat.
403
00:20:21,074 --> 00:20:23,368
Mm. Yeah. The only thing
I can't figure out is
404
00:20:23,451 --> 00:20:26,204
where'd that second
blue captain's hat come from?
405
00:20:26,287 --> 00:20:29,082
Oh, you found that?
I got that for you as a surprise.
406
00:20:29,165 --> 00:20:31,751
I thought it'd be cute
if you and your dad had matching hats.
407
00:20:34,712 --> 00:20:37,507
So Dad and I have hats, and Don doesn't.
408
00:20:38,258 --> 00:20:41,344
[laughs] Nice job, honey.
409
00:20:41,427 --> 00:20:42,762
[chuckles]
410
00:20:45,765 --> 00:20:47,767
[upbeat music playing]