1 00:00:04,275 --> 00:00:06,694 Guys, stop what you're doing. I have something to tell you. 2 00:00:07,319 --> 00:00:09,739 Is it bad news? Is it Dad's pacemaker? 3 00:00:09,822 --> 00:00:11,365 Should I sit down or stand up? 4 00:00:11,449 --> 00:00:14,368 Just to be safe, I'm gonna split the difference and lean. 5 00:00:15,870 --> 00:00:21,208 I just heard on the radio that in England, they call bologna "polony." 6 00:00:23,669 --> 00:00:26,130 I don't like it. It's arrogant. 7 00:00:27,882 --> 00:00:31,469 I gotta go to the bank. Or as they call it in England, the "pank." 8 00:00:31,552 --> 00:00:33,137 We're not doing that, Lowell. 9 00:00:33,679 --> 00:00:34,722 Copy that. 10 00:00:37,933 --> 00:00:39,143 [phone chimes] 11 00:00:41,062 --> 00:00:42,396 Lowell just got a text. 12 00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:44,732 Hey, come on. That's personal. Don't read it. 13 00:00:45,274 --> 00:00:46,942 -It's from his ex-wife. -Read it. 14 00:00:47,485 --> 00:00:49,987 -[high-pitched voice] "Hey, Lowell"-- -Normal voice. 15 00:00:50,780 --> 00:00:53,073 [speaking normally] "Hey, Lowell, can we get together for a drink? 16 00:00:53,157 --> 00:00:55,326 It's not about the kids, it's about us." 17 00:00:55,910 --> 00:00:59,205 "Us"? They don't have an "us" anymore. What do you think she wants? 18 00:00:59,288 --> 00:01:03,042 Sex. Men and women only drink together to loosen up for boom-boom time. 19 00:01:03,125 --> 00:01:04,794 [sighs] This is not good. 20 00:01:04,877 --> 00:01:07,004 Lowell was devastated after she cheated on him. 21 00:01:07,088 --> 00:01:09,882 If he thinks he has another chance with her, he'll jump at it. 22 00:01:09,965 --> 00:01:13,302 Then she'll break his heart and we'll be knee-deep in man tears again. 23 00:01:13,969 --> 00:01:15,471 Remember how loud he cries? 24 00:01:15,554 --> 00:01:17,348 It was the worst sound I've ever heard. 25 00:01:17,431 --> 00:01:20,684 And I saw a documentary on a marching band that got sucked up by a twister. 26 00:01:22,103 --> 00:01:23,479 You know, all the horns. 27 00:01:24,063 --> 00:01:25,064 Yeah. 28 00:01:25,147 --> 00:01:27,066 Okay, let's think about this. Um... 29 00:01:27,149 --> 00:01:29,527 Ooh. What if we stop it before it happens? 30 00:01:29,610 --> 00:01:30,694 We'll delete Jen's text, 31 00:01:30,778 --> 00:01:32,822 Lowell won't text her back, the whole thing goes away. 32 00:01:32,905 --> 00:01:34,365 -Let's do it. -Okay. 33 00:01:35,533 --> 00:01:38,828 -Uh, I don't know how to do it. -Right there. That's delete. 34 00:01:38,911 --> 00:01:41,747 That deletes the whole chain. How do you delete just one text? 35 00:01:41,831 --> 00:01:43,040 I got it. 36 00:01:43,123 --> 00:01:45,417 You're highlighting it. That's copy-and-paste. 37 00:01:45,501 --> 00:01:46,961 You just took a picture of us. 38 00:01:47,503 --> 00:01:48,629 [car door closes] 39 00:01:50,965 --> 00:01:53,300 -No, he's back. He can't see this text. -What do we do? 40 00:01:53,384 --> 00:01:55,219 Uh... Just take it. Take the whole damn phone. 41 00:01:55,302 --> 00:01:57,429 -I don't want it. -Just stash it somewhere. 42 00:02:00,057 --> 00:02:01,142 Not there. 43 00:02:01,225 --> 00:02:03,352 -It's all right. We're family. -Come on... 44 00:02:05,437 --> 00:02:07,022 -I forgot my phone. -Ah. 45 00:02:07,106 --> 00:02:08,232 Right on. 46 00:02:09,275 --> 00:02:13,571 I pulled onto Old Town Road and asked Siri to play "Old Town Road," like I do. 47 00:02:13,654 --> 00:02:15,990 But when she didn't, I thought she was ignoring me, 48 00:02:16,073 --> 00:02:17,533 so I asked louder and louder 49 00:02:17,616 --> 00:02:21,120 until I realized I didn't have my phone and I was shouting at myself. 50 00:02:21,203 --> 00:02:23,205 If I had a nickel. [chuckles] 51 00:02:23,831 --> 00:02:25,541 -Right? -[laughter] 52 00:02:27,585 --> 00:02:30,087 -[sighs] -Huh. It's not here. 53 00:02:30,171 --> 00:02:31,297 -Hmm. -Yeah. 54 00:02:31,380 --> 00:02:34,216 Well, I hope you're not suggesting that it's in Adam's pants. 55 00:02:48,522 --> 00:02:50,566 Hey. Sorry I'm late for dinner. 56 00:02:51,442 --> 00:02:54,445 Oh, dinner. That's why I came in here. 57 00:02:54,528 --> 00:02:55,613 [chuckles] 58 00:02:57,072 --> 00:02:59,074 I stopped by Dad's after work to check on him. 59 00:02:59,158 --> 00:03:01,827 How is he adjusting to life with the new pacemaker? 60 00:03:01,911 --> 00:03:05,080 He seemed fine, but I could tell they were hurrying me out. 61 00:03:05,164 --> 00:03:07,958 Especially when Dad said, "Hurry and get out." 62 00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:12,546 You think he's not feeling well, and he's trying to hide it? 63 00:03:12,630 --> 00:03:15,674 Something's going on. I need to get to the bottom of it. 64 00:03:16,717 --> 00:03:17,718 When's dinner? 65 00:03:18,385 --> 00:03:20,804 I have been down here working on it for hours. 66 00:03:20,888 --> 00:03:22,431 I am only one person. 67 00:03:23,682 --> 00:03:26,518 Hey, uh, Katie, can you go check on Grandpa? 68 00:03:26,602 --> 00:03:29,104 Snoop around, see how he's doing and report back to me? 69 00:03:29,188 --> 00:03:31,398 -I don't like the idea of spying. -Wha... 70 00:03:32,274 --> 00:03:33,525 I'll give you $20. 71 00:03:35,319 --> 00:03:36,862 Okay. I'll do anything for money. 72 00:03:38,864 --> 00:03:40,574 Well, that's comforting to a father. 73 00:03:42,701 --> 00:03:44,286 I'll go after school tomorrow. 74 00:03:47,790 --> 00:03:49,959 Uh, why do you have an extra cell phone? 75 00:03:50,042 --> 00:03:51,627 [gasps] Oh. 76 00:03:51,710 --> 00:03:54,213 Is it a burner for your secret second family? 77 00:03:56,548 --> 00:03:58,175 Yeah. Is that gonna be a problem? 78 00:04:00,511 --> 00:04:04,556 No, but maybe you could fill up your other wife's DVR 79 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:06,058 with Finding Bigfoot. 80 00:04:07,268 --> 00:04:09,520 [chuckles] This is Lowell's phone. 81 00:04:09,603 --> 00:04:11,939 Jen texted him that she wanted to meet for a drink. 82 00:04:12,022 --> 00:04:14,817 I didn't want him to see it and be tempted to get back together with her. 83 00:04:14,900 --> 00:04:16,151 So you stole his phone? 84 00:04:16,235 --> 00:04:18,612 Well, we tried to delete just the one text, 85 00:04:18,696 --> 00:04:21,407 but I think you can only do that from Apple headquarters. 86 00:04:22,366 --> 00:04:26,620 Well, look, you got to give Lowell his phone back. All right? 87 00:04:26,704 --> 00:04:28,247 If you're concerned for your friend, 88 00:04:28,330 --> 00:04:30,457 just tell him you're worried because you care about him. 89 00:04:30,541 --> 00:04:32,293 That's not how we do it. 90 00:04:33,877 --> 00:04:35,671 I steal his phone. That's how we do it. 91 00:04:36,588 --> 00:04:40,009 Look, I agree with you. Jen is terrible for him. 92 00:04:40,092 --> 00:04:43,721 But Lowell's a grown man. You need to let him make his own choices. 93 00:04:45,264 --> 00:04:46,598 I'm a grown man. 94 00:04:47,683 --> 00:04:49,685 You don't let me make my own choices. 95 00:04:50,769 --> 00:04:52,396 Honey, give Lowell his phone back. 96 00:04:54,898 --> 00:04:57,609 I don't have these problems with my secret second family. 97 00:04:58,444 --> 00:05:00,070 I'm the boss over there. 98 00:05:03,866 --> 00:05:05,492 When's Lowell getting here? 99 00:05:05,576 --> 00:05:07,786 I'm pulling up his location on Find My Friends. 100 00:05:09,455 --> 00:05:10,914 He's in the living room! 101 00:05:12,666 --> 00:05:14,960 Oh, that's right. We have his phone. 102 00:05:15,044 --> 00:05:17,129 I still think it's a mistake to give this back. 103 00:05:17,212 --> 00:05:18,505 I know how to get rid of it. 104 00:05:18,589 --> 00:05:21,925 Give it to one of the kids and tell them, "Don't lose it." We'll never see it again. 105 00:05:23,886 --> 00:05:25,971 Why didn't you guys just delete the text? 106 00:05:26,055 --> 00:05:28,891 It can't be done. We don't work for NASA, Marcy. 107 00:05:29,767 --> 00:05:31,769 It's two steps: edit, delete. 108 00:05:31,852 --> 00:05:34,813 I know because I deleted all of Don's texts about polony. 109 00:05:36,690 --> 00:05:39,068 It's what the British people call bologna. 110 00:05:40,277 --> 00:05:43,072 I don't like it. It's arrogant. 111 00:05:44,573 --> 00:05:46,450 You and I are so made for each other. 112 00:05:48,702 --> 00:05:51,371 -Hey, what's up? -Hey, Lowell. Uh, have a seat. 113 00:05:51,455 --> 00:05:55,042 I can't stay long. I'm meeting a guy who responded to my "lost phone" flyer. 114 00:05:55,125 --> 00:05:56,543 He said to meet him in an alley 115 00:05:56,627 --> 00:05:59,546 and wear a tank top and gym shorts so he knows it's me. 116 00:06:02,049 --> 00:06:05,344 Uh-huh. In the future, maybe run that stuff by us, okay? 117 00:06:05,427 --> 00:06:07,429 Yeah. Uh, so, Lowell, um, 118 00:06:07,513 --> 00:06:10,182 how are you feeling about your ex-wife these days? 119 00:06:10,265 --> 00:06:12,059 I'm finally in a good place. 120 00:06:12,142 --> 00:06:14,103 I haven't hacked into her e-mail in months. 121 00:06:16,230 --> 00:06:17,606 You broke into her e-mail? 122 00:06:17,689 --> 00:06:21,652 Yeah. I have Jen's password, and every night after the divorce, 123 00:06:21,735 --> 00:06:24,863 I would curl up in her old sweatshirt and read her in-box. 124 00:06:26,865 --> 00:06:29,827 That sounded sexy, but I know it's sad. 125 00:06:30,953 --> 00:06:32,371 But you're over her now? 126 00:06:32,454 --> 00:06:34,581 Totally and completely. 127 00:06:34,665 --> 00:06:37,626 Okay, well, then, I guess you can have your phone back. 128 00:06:38,752 --> 00:06:40,003 Don took it. 129 00:06:41,296 --> 00:06:44,883 Yeah. Because-- Because Jen texted you, and we didn't want you to overreact. 130 00:06:44,967 --> 00:06:47,761 That's no big deal. We text each other all the time about the kids-- 131 00:06:47,845 --> 00:06:49,054 A drink? 132 00:06:50,472 --> 00:06:51,598 She wants to get a drink. 133 00:06:51,682 --> 00:06:53,892 Okay, hold on, hold on. Don't get too excited. 134 00:06:53,976 --> 00:06:56,395 We're getting back together. Jump up and down with me. 135 00:06:56,478 --> 00:06:59,398 Oh. Yeah, no, uh, Lowell, I'm wearing the wrong bra. 136 00:06:59,481 --> 00:07:02,401 Yeah. No jumping. I thought you said you were over her. 137 00:07:02,484 --> 00:07:05,279 That was when she didn't want me back. Now she wants me back. 138 00:07:05,362 --> 00:07:06,738 I'm back! 139 00:07:08,407 --> 00:07:10,784 I'm answering her. "Where and when?" 140 00:07:10,868 --> 00:07:13,162 Okay, Lowell, just because Jen wants a one-nighter, 141 00:07:13,245 --> 00:07:14,955 doesn't mean she wants to get back together. 142 00:07:15,038 --> 00:07:16,582 That's right, Andi. Tell him. 143 00:07:16,665 --> 00:07:20,836 She could just be using you. I mean, ladies like cheap sex too. 144 00:07:23,297 --> 00:07:24,715 Well, don't lie to him. 145 00:07:25,424 --> 00:07:26,425 [phone chimes] 146 00:07:26,508 --> 00:07:27,843 [gasps] She answered. 147 00:07:27,926 --> 00:07:32,264 "I'm staying at the Bainbridge Hotel this weekend. Let's get a drink tomorrow." 148 00:07:32,347 --> 00:07:34,057 She definitely wants me back. 149 00:07:34,141 --> 00:07:35,517 How do you figure? 150 00:07:35,601 --> 00:07:37,436 The Bainbridge is where we had our first date. 151 00:07:37,519 --> 00:07:40,189 It's the most romantic spot in our pantheon of love. 152 00:07:40,272 --> 00:07:44,485 Mm-hmm. Does your pantheon have a cheater's basement? Huh? 153 00:07:44,568 --> 00:07:46,987 'Cause she really steamed up the windows down there. 154 00:07:48,280 --> 00:07:51,283 That's true. She's put you through a lot of polony. 155 00:07:51,366 --> 00:07:52,534 [together] No. 156 00:07:53,202 --> 00:07:54,453 Okay, okay. 157 00:07:55,037 --> 00:07:58,916 Why would Jen be staying at the Bainbridge tonight if she's meeting you tomorrow? 158 00:07:58,999 --> 00:08:01,668 That's a great question, Andi. Doesn't make any sense. 159 00:08:02,836 --> 00:08:05,380 Unless she's preparing our love nest. 160 00:08:05,464 --> 00:08:08,300 She probably wants me to stay over tomorrow. I should pack a bag. 161 00:08:08,383 --> 00:08:11,094 [stammering] Lowell, you're making a big mistake. 162 00:08:11,178 --> 00:08:13,680 You're right. Play it cool. 163 00:08:13,764 --> 00:08:16,058 I'll wear two pairs of underwear just to be safe. 164 00:08:17,434 --> 00:08:19,436 One dressy, one everyday. 165 00:08:22,105 --> 00:08:23,774 He's in for a world of hurt. 166 00:08:23,857 --> 00:08:26,485 [sighs] There's got to be something we can do. 167 00:08:26,568 --> 00:08:29,279 Well, there was. Not give him back his phone. 168 00:08:30,072 --> 00:08:31,698 All right, nobody likes that guy. 169 00:08:32,824 --> 00:08:34,451 Okay, uh... Ooh. 170 00:08:34,535 --> 00:08:36,828 All right. Don and I will go down to the Bainbridge 171 00:08:36,912 --> 00:08:38,580 to talk to Jen and find out her intentions. 172 00:08:38,664 --> 00:08:41,542 If she's just toying with Lowell, we'll tell her to leave him alone. 173 00:08:41,625 --> 00:08:44,127 Oh. You guys are doing a good thing. 174 00:08:44,836 --> 00:08:46,880 I wish we didn't have to go to the Bainbridge. 175 00:08:46,964 --> 00:08:48,465 They charge ten bucks for parking. 176 00:08:48,549 --> 00:08:51,301 I tell you what. If you drive, I'll let you pay for parking. 177 00:08:52,886 --> 00:08:53,929 That sounds fair. 178 00:08:55,472 --> 00:08:56,848 Wait a minute. 179 00:08:58,350 --> 00:09:00,102 -No. That's right. -[Adam] Yeah. 180 00:09:03,230 --> 00:09:04,231 Hello? 181 00:09:08,652 --> 00:09:11,196 Grandpa? Is everybody okay? 182 00:09:15,284 --> 00:09:17,661 [Joe] Bev, if you're gonna talk dirty, talk louder. 183 00:09:17,744 --> 00:09:19,496 You know I don't hear too good. 184 00:09:29,464 --> 00:09:31,842 Welcome to the Bainbridge Hotel. May I help you? 185 00:09:31,925 --> 00:09:34,261 Yeah. We're looking for a guest staying here-- Jen Franklin. 186 00:09:34,344 --> 00:09:37,097 Miss Franklin's bachelorette party is in the hotel bar. 187 00:09:37,180 --> 00:09:38,599 Bachelorette party? 188 00:09:38,682 --> 00:09:40,434 Wha-- Jen's getting married? 189 00:09:41,018 --> 00:09:43,395 By any chance, is she marrying a guy named Lowell? 190 00:09:45,314 --> 00:09:47,941 What kind of person has their ex meet her where they had their first date 191 00:09:48,025 --> 00:09:49,443 to tell him she's marrying another guy? 192 00:09:49,526 --> 00:09:51,653 I'm giving Jen a piece of my mind. 193 00:09:51,737 --> 00:09:53,322 Ask if they validate parking. 194 00:09:55,157 --> 00:09:57,701 -[music playing] -We're looking for Jen Franklin. 195 00:09:57,784 --> 00:09:59,411 [gasps] The strippers are here! 196 00:09:59,494 --> 00:10:01,079 [cheering] 197 00:10:01,163 --> 00:10:02,789 We're not strippers. 198 00:10:02,873 --> 00:10:05,292 Hold on. Let's see how this plays out. 199 00:10:06,084 --> 00:10:08,754 You guys can't start the show till Jen comes down from her room. 200 00:10:09,671 --> 00:10:11,632 Did you use a Groupon? 201 00:10:13,175 --> 00:10:16,136 Groupon? Hey, I did not come here to get my feelings hurt. 202 00:10:16,219 --> 00:10:18,555 And if I was a stripper, you'd be paying full price. 203 00:10:19,181 --> 00:10:20,182 Let's go, Don. 204 00:10:21,433 --> 00:10:23,935 You just talked yourself out of the full monty, lady. 205 00:10:29,399 --> 00:10:32,235 So not only does Jen not want to get back together with Lowell, 206 00:10:32,319 --> 00:10:34,029 she's marrying someone else. 207 00:10:34,112 --> 00:10:35,697 I can't believe that. 208 00:10:35,781 --> 00:10:39,242 And in sexier news, Adam and I were mistaken for strippers. 209 00:10:43,455 --> 00:10:44,748 I believe that. 210 00:10:46,249 --> 00:10:47,668 Thanks, baby. 211 00:10:53,173 --> 00:10:55,300 You're awfully quiet over there, Andi. 212 00:10:56,176 --> 00:10:58,762 Huh? Oh, yeah, yeah. You can shake your moneymaker. 213 00:10:58,845 --> 00:11:02,432 Look, I just... I'm worried about Lowell. 214 00:11:02,516 --> 00:11:04,226 I mean, he's not gonna take this well. 215 00:11:04,309 --> 00:11:06,603 Which is exactly why I stole his phone to begin with. 216 00:11:06,687 --> 00:11:10,774 All right, so we'll tell Lowell the news, and then you will make him feel better 217 00:11:10,857 --> 00:11:13,402 by telling him how much he means to you as a friend. 218 00:11:13,485 --> 00:11:15,028 [laughs] I'm not doing that. 219 00:11:16,571 --> 00:11:18,824 Men don't talk about feelings. 220 00:11:18,907 --> 00:11:21,284 Lowell tells you how he feels about you all the time. 221 00:11:21,368 --> 00:11:22,953 And it's really uncomfortable. 222 00:11:24,121 --> 00:11:25,872 I wish he'd steal my phone instead. 223 00:11:25,956 --> 00:11:27,249 [door opens] 224 00:11:29,209 --> 00:11:33,088 -Hey, Katie. How was Grandpa? -I don't want to talk about it. 225 00:11:33,171 --> 00:11:35,632 Whoa, wait. What did you-- What did you find out? 226 00:11:35,715 --> 00:11:37,717 That you might have a little brother coming soon. 227 00:11:44,766 --> 00:11:49,896 So, Lowell, we have something to tell you, and there-- there's no easy way to say it. 228 00:11:49,980 --> 00:11:51,898 So... Marcy, say it. 229 00:11:56,445 --> 00:11:57,946 -Thank you, Andi. -Yeah. 230 00:11:58,029 --> 00:12:01,908 Lowell, today we found out-- Andi, you finish. 231 00:12:03,952 --> 00:12:06,121 That Jen-- Back to you, Marcy. 232 00:12:08,123 --> 00:12:09,666 -Is-- Andi? -Getting-- Marcy? 233 00:12:10,250 --> 00:12:12,919 M... Andi? 234 00:12:13,003 --> 00:12:16,465 Oh, for crying out loud. Lowell, Jen's getting married again. 235 00:12:17,507 --> 00:12:20,802 -What? -We're sorry you had to hear it from us. 236 00:12:20,886 --> 00:12:22,471 Who is she marrying? 237 00:12:22,554 --> 00:12:25,599 I looked up her wedding registry. It's some guy named Ira Stone. 238 00:12:25,682 --> 00:12:29,060 Ira Stone? He was my divorce lawyer. 239 00:12:30,604 --> 00:12:33,064 I bet that's why she got all your money. 240 00:12:36,151 --> 00:12:37,861 What? Someone already said that? 241 00:12:40,363 --> 00:12:42,282 Why am I the one who always gets hurt? 242 00:12:42,365 --> 00:12:45,243 When's it gonna be her turn to cry so loud the neighbors call the police 243 00:12:45,327 --> 00:12:47,287 because they think a cat is stuck in the wall? 244 00:12:49,581 --> 00:12:52,375 Oh, Lowell, I know it's hard, but we're here for you. 245 00:12:52,459 --> 00:12:54,711 Yeah. We'll help you rise above. 246 00:12:54,794 --> 00:12:57,172 Or we can help you sink below. 247 00:12:58,548 --> 00:13:00,842 You don't always have to be on the losing end. 248 00:13:00,926 --> 00:13:04,513 You may not be able to get her back, but you can get her back. 249 00:13:04,596 --> 00:13:06,348 You just said the same thing twice. 250 00:13:08,475 --> 00:13:11,311 Adam is talking about the dish best served cold. 251 00:13:13,021 --> 00:13:14,147 Jell-O? 252 00:13:16,691 --> 00:13:19,236 Revenge, Don. I'm talking about revenge. 253 00:13:21,238 --> 00:13:23,114 -What do you think? -Let's do it. 254 00:13:23,198 --> 00:13:24,491 -All right. -That a boy. 255 00:13:24,574 --> 00:13:27,202 All right, let's get to work. You have Jen's e-mail password. 256 00:13:27,285 --> 00:13:29,955 There's got to be some part of her life we can screw up. 257 00:13:30,038 --> 00:13:31,790 You bet your bippy there is. 258 00:13:33,667 --> 00:13:35,168 I'll go home and get the password. 259 00:13:35,252 --> 00:13:37,879 One quick cry in her sweatshirt, and I'll be back. 260 00:13:44,427 --> 00:13:46,221 I found Kate's purse at our place. 261 00:13:46,304 --> 00:13:49,099 I guess she left it there when... well, you know. 262 00:13:50,684 --> 00:13:51,810 What? I don't know. 263 00:13:51,893 --> 00:13:54,604 She caught your father and me in a compromising position. 264 00:13:54,688 --> 00:13:56,731 -[gasps] -Or positions. 265 00:13:56,815 --> 00:13:59,192 I'm not sure how long she was standing there. 266 00:14:00,569 --> 00:14:02,821 Ma, don't say "positions" to me. 267 00:14:04,531 --> 00:14:07,742 Poor Katie. No wonder she was asking to go to church. 268 00:14:09,953 --> 00:14:12,455 Your father's new pacemaker has had some side effects. 269 00:14:12,539 --> 00:14:13,707 It's made him very randy. 270 00:14:13,790 --> 00:14:15,166 Okay, thanks for stopping by. 271 00:14:16,334 --> 00:14:17,919 I mean, he's like a new man. 272 00:14:18,003 --> 00:14:20,589 We haven't done some of that stuff since Nixon. 273 00:14:22,340 --> 00:14:25,594 Seriously, you have to stop talking before this whole house turns to ash. 274 00:14:25,677 --> 00:14:30,307 Wait. I need a favor. Ask your dad to turn down his pacemaker. 275 00:14:30,390 --> 00:14:34,561 A little. Nothing dangerous. I just need time to run a few errands. 276 00:14:35,770 --> 00:14:38,773 Fine. I can't do it right now. I'm in the middle of something. 277 00:14:38,857 --> 00:14:41,860 Make it soon. I haven't finished a crossword in a week. 278 00:14:41,943 --> 00:14:43,361 They're piling up. 279 00:14:46,573 --> 00:14:48,950 -What'd your mom want? -To ruin my day. 280 00:14:51,578 --> 00:14:53,580 -Did you get Jen's password? -Yep. Here you go. 281 00:14:53,663 --> 00:14:55,248 Oh. Okay. 282 00:14:55,332 --> 00:14:56,958 You had to write this down? 283 00:14:57,042 --> 00:14:59,419 It's just a random jumble of letters and numbers. 284 00:14:59,502 --> 00:15:02,589 Lowell, it's "Down2play24-7." 285 00:15:04,090 --> 00:15:06,635 I said it's random. 286 00:15:08,345 --> 00:15:09,804 Okay, honey, sure. 287 00:15:11,181 --> 00:15:13,934 Uh, okay, I opened Jen's e-mail. 288 00:15:14,017 --> 00:15:16,561 Look, she used a travel website to plan her honeymoon. 289 00:15:16,645 --> 00:15:21,816 [gasps] Flight, hotel. It is perfectly bundled for revenge. 290 00:15:21,900 --> 00:15:25,320 -It says "click link to access itinerary." -Mm-hmm. 291 00:15:25,403 --> 00:15:27,739 It wants us to do it. It doesn't like her either. 292 00:15:30,116 --> 00:15:32,869 We're in! [chuckles] I've always wanted to say that. 293 00:15:34,162 --> 00:15:37,123 Jen booked two business class tickets to Hawaii. 294 00:15:37,207 --> 00:15:39,417 Lowell, what do you want to do about that? 295 00:15:40,418 --> 00:15:43,338 I say, let's move her to the back... 296 00:15:43,421 --> 00:15:45,382 -Yeah. -...of business class. 297 00:15:47,008 --> 00:15:49,928 That way, when they pass out the freshly baked cookies, 298 00:15:50,011 --> 00:15:53,306 they won't be hot anymore, they'll just be warm. 299 00:15:56,559 --> 00:15:59,854 Uh, okay, you got to dial it up a little, Lowell. All right? 300 00:15:59,938 --> 00:16:03,274 Honey, move Jen to the back of the plane next to the bathroom, huh? 301 00:16:03,358 --> 00:16:06,611 She put you in a crappy situation. We're gonna do the same thing to her. 302 00:16:08,196 --> 00:16:12,283 Oh. Click "modify hotel reservation." 303 00:16:12,367 --> 00:16:17,622 "Beachfront room"? I don't think so. Unless we fill it with scorpions. 304 00:16:20,542 --> 00:16:22,335 Okay, now dial it down a little. 305 00:16:24,963 --> 00:16:27,090 Okay, what's the worst room in a hotel? 306 00:16:27,173 --> 00:16:30,135 Ground floor, parking lot view. It's what we always get. 307 00:16:30,677 --> 00:16:33,138 I don't need an ocean view when I got a Marcy view. 308 00:16:33,221 --> 00:16:36,349 Aw. That's sweet. I thought you were just cheap. 309 00:16:36,433 --> 00:16:38,018 [chuckles] It's a little of both. 310 00:16:40,186 --> 00:16:44,899 Okay. All set. The only thing left to do is hit "confirm changes." 311 00:16:45,442 --> 00:16:46,735 You do the honors. 312 00:16:46,818 --> 00:16:48,153 [chuckles] 313 00:16:50,488 --> 00:16:51,489 I don't know. 314 00:16:51,573 --> 00:16:53,241 What? What-- What don't you know? 315 00:16:53,324 --> 00:16:55,201 Maybe I should leave the door open with Jen. 316 00:16:55,285 --> 00:16:57,162 -Wha-- -Yeah, she's marrying another man, 317 00:16:57,245 --> 00:16:58,496 but she cheated on me. 318 00:16:58,580 --> 00:17:00,373 She could cheat on him with me. 319 00:17:00,457 --> 00:17:01,708 [groans] 320 00:17:03,710 --> 00:17:05,795 Have you learned nothing from this, Lowell? 321 00:17:05,879 --> 00:17:07,964 Jen is a horrible person. 322 00:17:08,048 --> 00:17:10,467 She's marrying your divorce lawyer. 323 00:17:10,550 --> 00:17:14,179 The guy you paid to sue her pants off took her pants off! 324 00:17:15,472 --> 00:17:18,850 Look, I have spent the last year watching you suffer. I won't do it again. 325 00:17:18,933 --> 00:17:21,186 I know, I know. Because I wasn't productive at work. 326 00:17:21,269 --> 00:17:23,730 No. I mean yes. But no. 327 00:17:23,813 --> 00:17:27,275 You just keep letting her take advantage of you, Lowell, 328 00:17:27,358 --> 00:17:28,610 and I can't stand it! 329 00:17:29,194 --> 00:17:31,571 I care about you. You are part of this family, 330 00:17:31,654 --> 00:17:33,615 and damn it, we love you! 331 00:17:36,534 --> 00:17:40,246 Aw. You did it. [chuckles] You yelled it, but you did it. 332 00:17:41,581 --> 00:17:44,626 Stand up for yourself and push that button. 333 00:17:48,129 --> 00:17:49,214 I don't need to. 334 00:17:51,633 --> 00:17:56,513 I think I held on to the idea of Jen because I was afraid I'd end up alone. 335 00:17:57,097 --> 00:18:00,225 But then you screamed at me from the heart. 336 00:18:01,976 --> 00:18:06,606 Now I know I can let her go because I have you guys. 337 00:18:06,689 --> 00:18:09,901 -[both] Aw... -That's weird. Press the button. 338 00:18:10,735 --> 00:18:12,612 Do it. Press it. 339 00:18:14,447 --> 00:18:17,242 No. Okay, we are proud of him, 340 00:18:17,325 --> 00:18:19,786 and Don and I are taking you out to dinner to celebrate. 341 00:18:20,870 --> 00:18:22,413 That's right, but you're gonna have to pay, 342 00:18:22,497 --> 00:18:24,624 because I have no idea where I left my wallet. 343 00:18:26,668 --> 00:18:27,669 [door closes] 344 00:18:30,046 --> 00:18:31,131 Thanks, Adam. 345 00:18:33,091 --> 00:18:34,467 Oh. Well, all right. 346 00:18:36,386 --> 00:18:37,887 You see what you started? 347 00:18:47,313 --> 00:18:48,815 Okay, let go, Lowell. 348 00:18:51,234 --> 00:18:53,736 My arms did, but my heart never will. 349 00:19:00,743 --> 00:19:02,328 Who talks like that? 350 00:19:04,706 --> 00:19:06,833 You love him. [chuckles] 351 00:19:07,792 --> 00:19:10,670 And I love when you show your sensitive side. 352 00:19:11,462 --> 00:19:12,755 I think it's hot. 353 00:19:13,381 --> 00:19:15,717 That's why I like you more than my secret second wife. 354 00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:17,135 Ah. 355 00:19:17,218 --> 00:19:18,803 [both laughing] 356 00:19:19,929 --> 00:19:23,224 Why can't any of you keep your hands off each other? 357 00:19:25,435 --> 00:19:26,811 [groans] 358 00:19:28,146 --> 00:19:30,148 -Let's take this upstairs. -Absolutely. 359 00:19:30,648 --> 00:19:32,984 Right behind you. Oh, uh, just got to do one thing. 360 00:19:34,110 --> 00:19:35,695 "Confirm changes." 361 00:19:36,946 --> 00:19:38,698 That's for you and your rude friends. 362 00:19:39,490 --> 00:19:41,034 "Groupon." [scoffs] 363 00:19:49,667 --> 00:19:50,668 Dad? 364 00:19:52,503 --> 00:19:53,713 Mom? 365 00:19:55,340 --> 00:19:57,133 This is as far as I'm coming in. 366 00:20:01,304 --> 00:20:02,305 Hello? 367 00:20:03,973 --> 00:20:05,725 I'm inside the house! 368 00:20:06,893 --> 00:20:09,229 It's okay. You don't have to talk to Dad. 369 00:20:09,312 --> 00:20:12,565 I doubled up on my B12s. Everything's hunky-dory. 370 00:20:13,358 --> 00:20:16,402 Run along, boy. This is grown-up time. 371 00:20:19,530 --> 00:20:21,282 I'm never coming back here again.