1
00:00:02,457 --> 00:00:03,758
Go, go, go. Oh!
You see that?

2
00:00:03,792 --> 00:00:05,460
We just took the lead!

3
00:00:05,494 --> 00:00:07,462
Hey, Dad, do you think
I could pull off these boots?

4
00:00:07,496 --> 00:00:09,531
Honey, I got 20 bucks
riding on this game.

5
00:00:09,564 --> 00:00:12,567
I-I'll pull your boots
off at halftime, okay?

6
00:00:12,601 --> 00:00:15,504
I don't know about that new
paint color in your bathroom.

7
00:00:15,537 --> 00:00:17,506
I know, Joy;
it's way too yellow.

8
00:00:17,539 --> 00:00:19,774
This morning, I thought
I was peeing on the sun.

9
00:00:19,808 --> 00:00:23,445
It's so bright, I could see it
from my bedroom window.

10
00:00:23,478 --> 00:00:27,716
Yeah, well, that's why
I asked Adam to repaint it.

11
00:00:27,749 --> 00:00:29,518
He turned a shade of red

12
00:00:29,551 --> 00:00:32,154
that I think would actually
look nice in the bathroom.

13
00:00:32,187 --> 00:00:33,855
Hmm. Mm-hmm.

14
00:00:33,888 --> 00:00:35,357
Husbands love redoing

15
00:00:35,390 --> 00:00:37,226
what they didn't want to do
in the first place.

16
00:00:37,259 --> 00:00:40,495
Yeah, we disagreed,
but then we sat down,

17
00:00:40,529 --> 00:00:41,796
had a discussion,
and he's repainting.

18
00:00:41,830 --> 00:00:43,265
Ah.
Yeah.

19
00:00:43,298 --> 00:00:46,168
Made him some nachos
to ease the blow.

20
00:00:46,201 --> 00:00:51,106
See, the angry part of his brain
is smaller than the nacho part.

21
00:00:51,140 --> 00:00:53,342
All right, I'll tell you what,
I'll buy you the boots

22
00:00:53,375 --> 00:00:54,876
if you help me repaint
the stupid bathroom--

23
00:00:54,909 --> 00:00:56,445
Ooh, nachos.

24
00:00:56,478 --> 00:00:58,680
Well, you deserve 'em, honey.

25
00:00:58,713 --> 00:01:00,649
And the cheese is
the color of the bathroom,

26
00:01:00,682 --> 00:01:02,417
so you won't forget
to repaint it.

27
00:01:06,655 --> 00:01:08,590
Howdy!

28
00:01:08,623 --> 00:01:10,625
I'm Baggy Britches,
and I have a message.

29
00:01:10,659 --> 00:01:11,626
Are you Kate Burns?

30
00:01:11,660 --> 00:01:13,295
No! No! Say no! Say no!

31
00:01:13,328 --> 00:01:15,730
What is wrong
with your husband?

32
00:01:15,764 --> 00:01:17,832
Don't look at his flower.
That's how they get you.

33
00:01:17,866 --> 00:01:20,602
Adam has a fear of clowns.

34
00:01:20,635 --> 00:01:22,304
It's not a fear, okay?

35
00:01:22,337 --> 00:01:24,706
It's a natural instinct
that's kept me alive thus far.

36
00:01:24,739 --> 00:01:29,278
Then why are you using your
daughter as a human shield?

37
00:01:29,311 --> 00:01:30,512
Because you're
too far away.

38
00:01:31,646 --> 00:01:33,248
Murder her;
I barely know her.

39
00:01:34,349 --> 00:01:36,851
* I've been sent over here
in my baggy pants *

40
00:01:36,885 --> 00:01:38,820
* 'Cause Danny Phillips
wants to ask Kate *

41
00:01:38,853 --> 00:01:40,855
* To the Spring Formal Dance.

42
00:01:40,889 --> 00:01:43,658
Seriously

43
00:01:43,692 --> 00:01:45,560
:
Oh, my God! Mom!

44
00:01:45,594 --> 00:01:47,662
Hey, you want to see some magic?

45
00:01:47,696 --> 00:01:49,431
No, no, no!

46
00:01:50,265 --> 00:01:51,700
Get out! Get out!

47
00:01:51,733 --> 00:01:53,668
Get out, get out, get out!

48
00:01:55,404 --> 00:01:57,239
That was close.

49
00:01:57,272 --> 00:01:59,741
Kate, the Spring Formal.
That's huge!

50
00:01:59,774 --> 00:02:01,210
I know.
I can't believe it.

51
00:02:01,243 --> 00:02:02,477
He's still out there.

52
00:02:02,511 --> 00:02:04,879
Oh, oh! I'm gonna
turn the sprinklers on.

53
00:02:04,913 --> 00:02:07,349
It'll wash off his makeup,
then he'll be powerless.

54
00:02:08,817 --> 00:02:10,552
ANDI:
I couldn't be happier for Kate.

55
00:02:10,585 --> 00:02:12,487
I mean, hardly
any freshman girls

56
00:02:12,521 --> 00:02:14,423
get asked to the
senior dance.

57
00:02:14,456 --> 00:02:17,426
Hold on. The guy
that asked her is a senior?

58
00:02:17,459 --> 00:02:20,562
All right, don't get
all Adam on this.

59
00:02:20,595 --> 00:02:22,364
I'm Adam.

60
00:02:23,532 --> 00:02:25,834
That's the only way I get.

61
00:02:25,867 --> 00:02:27,569
Look, it doesn't mean
they're dating.

62
00:02:27,602 --> 00:02:28,903
It's just one dance.

63
00:02:28,937 --> 00:02:31,306
One dance is enough.

64
00:02:31,340 --> 00:02:34,809
That's where you do all the
laying down things standing up.

65
00:02:34,843 --> 00:02:37,312
Yeah, I know. I remember
from our wedding night.

66
00:02:37,346 --> 00:02:38,847
It was like you had six hands.

67
00:02:38,880 --> 00:02:41,483
Andi, any senior
that asks out a freshman

68
00:02:41,516 --> 00:02:43,452
has something wrong with him.

69
00:02:43,485 --> 00:02:46,221
Okay, he's the kind of guy
who ends up dressed as a clown,

70
00:02:46,255 --> 00:02:48,957
terrorizing honest citizens.

71
00:02:48,990 --> 00:02:52,427
For all we know, that was him.

72
00:02:52,461 --> 00:02:55,930
Boy, you get lost in one
fun house, it ruins your life.

73
00:02:55,964 --> 00:02:59,368
Fun house.

74
00:02:59,401 --> 00:03:02,571
Never has a place been
more incorrectly named.

75
00:03:02,604 --> 00:03:05,507
She is not going to that dance,
and that's the end of it.

76
00:03:05,540 --> 00:03:10,479
Okay, well, let's sit down
and discuss it.

77
00:03:10,512 --> 00:03:13,915
And after, we can have nachos.

78
00:03:14,949 --> 00:03:16,451
No, no, no, no, no.

79
00:03:16,485 --> 00:03:18,953
No. I'm not going
to the chairs with you.

80
00:03:18,987 --> 00:03:21,456
Every time we sit down
and discuss, I lose.

81
00:03:21,490 --> 00:03:25,294
I don't know what you're
talking about, but I'd like to.

82
00:03:25,327 --> 00:03:27,262
Hey, let's have a seat,

83
00:03:27,296 --> 00:03:29,498
talk it out.

84
00:03:34,436 --> 00:03:36,471
Not this time, sunshine.

85
00:03:36,505 --> 00:03:38,307
This time, I'm gonna prep.

86
00:03:38,340 --> 00:03:40,542
I'm going to the blackboard,
drawing some X's and O's,

87
00:03:40,575 --> 00:03:42,477
and getting some plays ready.

88
00:03:42,511 --> 00:03:45,347
Yeah, well, that makes sense.
Yeah.

89
00:03:45,380 --> 00:03:47,582
You want to run
any of these plays by me?

90
00:03:47,616 --> 00:03:51,386
Well, for starters, Katie's--
Oh, you're good.

91
00:03:52,554 --> 00:03:54,055
I'm onto you now, though.

92
00:03:54,088 --> 00:03:56,825
I'm never sitting down
in here again.

93
00:03:58,860 --> 00:04:00,862
*

94
00:04:10,539 --> 00:04:12,341
I just don't think
Katie should date a senior.

95
00:04:12,374 --> 00:04:13,842
But I'm oh for a thousand
with Andi

96
00:04:13,875 --> 00:04:15,644
when we sit down
and have these discussions.

97
00:04:15,677 --> 00:04:17,078
I'm like that team that plays
the Harlem Globetrotters.

98
00:04:17,111 --> 00:04:18,347
I'm trying to make a point,

99
00:04:18,380 --> 00:04:22,016
and she's running circles around
me, bouncing balls off my head.

100
00:04:22,050 --> 00:04:24,653
Our problem is wives have
more stamina than us.

101
00:04:24,686 --> 00:04:27,622
We'd rather lose
than listen.

102
00:04:27,656 --> 00:04:29,991
And even if you win a point,
they keep coming at you,

103
00:04:30,024 --> 00:04:31,860
like waves at the beach.

104
00:04:31,893 --> 00:04:33,962
Blah-blah-blah,
blah-blah-blah.

105
00:04:33,995 --> 00:04:37,432
Mostly my marriage
is fifty-fifty,

106
00:04:37,466 --> 00:04:40,101
but when we have
a difference of opinion, I lose

107
00:04:40,134 --> 00:04:42,437
because I go with my gut
and Andi goes with logic.

108
00:04:42,471 --> 00:04:44,973
She can make a good argument
for any bad idea.

109
00:04:45,006 --> 00:04:49,010
If you really want to win, I
know a trick from the old days.

110
00:04:49,043 --> 00:04:52,013
It's called
silent negotiation.

111
00:04:52,046 --> 00:04:53,682
I've heard of that.

112
00:04:53,715 --> 00:04:56,785
You let her talk first, but
then you don't say a word.

113
00:04:56,818 --> 00:04:58,953
You just stare at her
and wait her out.

114
00:04:58,987 --> 00:05:01,690
She'll start talking in
circles, doubting herself.

115
00:05:01,723 --> 00:05:05,093
Eventually she'll break down
like a Chinese Rolex.

116
00:05:05,126 --> 00:05:06,895
Like the one you gave me
for Christmas?

117
00:05:06,928 --> 00:05:08,697
I went to see what time it was,

118
00:05:08,730 --> 00:05:10,899
and all the numbers
just fell to the bottom.

119
00:05:10,932 --> 00:05:13,802
I told you not to let
the sun hit it!

120
00:05:13,835 --> 00:05:15,804
I don't want Katie
to go to the dance,

121
00:05:15,837 --> 00:05:18,373
but this silent negotiation,
that's never gonna work.

122
00:05:18,407 --> 00:05:20,475
I'm right about this.

123
00:05:20,509 --> 00:05:22,043
My grandfather said "I do,"

124
00:05:22,076 --> 00:05:24,979
then he didn't speak
to his wife again for 40 years.

125
00:05:25,013 --> 00:05:26,648
He got everything he wanted.

126
00:05:28,817 --> 00:05:30,118
Here, I'll do it on Don.

127
00:05:30,151 --> 00:05:31,653
Hey, fellas.
Hey.

128
00:05:31,686 --> 00:05:33,455
Hey, Donny,

129
00:05:33,488 --> 00:05:37,826
I need you to take your mother
to the fabric store tonight.

130
00:05:37,859 --> 00:05:40,395
Sorry, Pop,
but we've been over this.

131
00:05:40,429 --> 00:05:43,398
It's not my responsibility
to run Mom around town.

132
00:05:47,135 --> 00:05:50,839
I'm her son, not her husband.
I have my own life.

133
00:05:55,176 --> 00:05:58,813
Come on, Pop, the fabric store?

134
00:06:01,583 --> 00:06:04,919
Although, Mom is getting older.

135
00:06:06,054 --> 00:06:08,122
Fine, I'll pick her up at 7:00.

136
00:06:08,156 --> 00:06:10,492
And that's how
you do that.

137
00:06:10,525 --> 00:06:12,126
Wow, look at him.

138
00:06:13,795 --> 00:06:15,597
He's still trying
to figure out what happened,

139
00:06:15,630 --> 00:06:19,033
like a bird
that flew into a window.

140
00:06:19,067 --> 00:06:21,436
Hello, darling.

141
00:06:21,470 --> 00:06:23,772
I'm ready to

142
00:06:23,805 --> 00:06:27,108
sit down and discuss
this whole...

143
00:06:28,710 --> 00:06:30,144
...Katie situation.

144
00:06:30,178 --> 00:06:32,781
Okay. I was born to discuss.

145
00:06:34,816 --> 00:06:37,686
You should know, I don't
have any nacho stuff.

146
00:06:37,719 --> 00:06:41,089
I'll take my chances.

147
00:06:41,122 --> 00:06:42,924
Ladies first.

148
00:06:42,957 --> 00:06:45,694
Okay, here's how I see it.
Okay, Kate is very mature.

149
00:06:45,727 --> 00:06:47,195
I mean, you've said
that yourself,

150
00:06:47,228 --> 00:06:51,099
so you're kind of arguing
against yourself here.

151
00:06:53,234 --> 00:06:58,139
And... and the school
has chaperones

152
00:06:58,172 --> 00:07:00,842
watching the entire time,

153
00:07:00,875 --> 00:07:03,111
thus removing
any potential for danger.

154
00:07:03,144 --> 00:07:05,480
Boom. Game, set, match.

155
00:07:05,514 --> 00:07:07,716
Hit the showers, kid! Ha!

156
00:07:11,052 --> 00:07:14,255
It's a school sanctioned event,
Adam.

157
00:07:14,288 --> 00:07:16,725
I mean, nothing will go wrong.

158
00:07:16,758 --> 00:07:19,160
She's gonna be surrounded
by adults all night.

159
00:07:24,165 --> 00:07:26,000
Except in the car.

160
00:07:27,201 --> 00:07:29,838
Which is where boys get handsy.

161
00:07:31,540 --> 00:07:34,175
And she's gonna be hanging out
with Danny's friends.

162
00:07:34,208 --> 00:07:36,845
And older kids
sneak alcohol into dances.

163
00:07:36,878 --> 00:07:39,514
You know what? You're right.
She shouldn't go to this thing.

164
00:07:39,548 --> 00:07:43,084
It's a bad idea.

165
00:07:43,117 --> 00:07:45,720
So we've reached an agreement?

166
00:07:48,723 --> 00:07:50,191
I guess so, yeah.

167
00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:00,935
Well, thanks for hearing me out.

168
00:08:09,944 --> 00:08:11,646
I've heard stories of
women losing arguments

169
00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:13,247
to their husbands;
I just never thought

170
00:08:13,281 --> 00:08:15,650
it'd happen to
someone I knew.

171
00:08:15,684 --> 00:08:18,286
What did he say
that was so convincing?

172
00:08:18,319 --> 00:08:21,556
Well,  he made
a lot of good points.

173
00:08:22,657 --> 00:08:24,759
He said...

174
00:08:24,793 --> 00:08:26,595
No, no, I said that.

175
00:08:26,628 --> 00:08:28,697
But he did say that...

176
00:08:28,730 --> 00:08:31,666
No, I said that, too.

177
00:08:31,700 --> 00:08:36,104
Wait, come to think of it,
he didn't say anything.

178
00:08:36,137 --> 00:08:38,807
Oh. He played the quiet game.

179
00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:39,874
What?

180
00:08:39,908 --> 00:08:40,942
It's a trick.

181
00:08:40,975 --> 00:08:42,110
That's how I got engaged.

182
00:08:42,143 --> 00:08:45,179
Rudy just wanted to shack up,
so I kept my mouth shut

183
00:08:45,213 --> 00:08:48,883
until he came back with a ring,
and then a better ring.

184
00:08:48,917 --> 00:08:50,685
So Adam played dirty.

185
00:08:50,719 --> 00:08:52,353
I knew I wasn't wrong.

186
00:08:52,386 --> 00:08:54,322
Kate should go to the dance.

187
00:08:54,355 --> 00:08:56,324
First of all,
you're never wrong.

188
00:08:56,357 --> 00:08:59,193
And even if you're wrong, you're
still more right than him.

189
00:08:59,227 --> 00:09:01,963
Yeah, well,
I can play dirty, too.

190
00:09:01,996 --> 00:09:04,032
Oh-ho-ho, just you watch.

191
00:09:04,065 --> 00:09:06,034
How do I play dirty?

192
00:09:06,067 --> 00:09:08,269
Well, he wanted to make
this decision, right?

193
00:09:08,302 --> 00:09:11,339
I say pile it on,
make him pick everything.

194
00:09:11,372 --> 00:09:13,141
Like the new color
for the bathroom.

195
00:09:13,174 --> 00:09:14,142
Oh, I can't let him do that.

196
00:09:14,175 --> 00:09:16,377
He'll just paint
a Van Halen logo on the wall.

197
00:09:16,410 --> 00:09:19,147
It won't even get that far.
Men hate these decisions.

198
00:09:19,180 --> 00:09:21,650
What color, how many,
thread count.

199
00:09:21,683 --> 00:09:23,117
Thread count.

200
00:09:23,151 --> 00:09:25,353
He doesn't even know
what that is.

201
00:09:25,386 --> 00:09:26,988
It'll drive him so crazy,

202
00:09:27,021 --> 00:09:29,991
he'll eventually fold
on everything, including Kate.

203
00:09:30,024 --> 00:09:32,827
And victory will be mine.

204
00:09:32,861 --> 00:09:35,730
I mean, you know, we'll be doing
the right thing for Kate,

205
00:09:35,764 --> 00:09:37,766
and that's what's important.

206
00:09:39,868 --> 00:09:43,404
It was beautiful, Don.
I said nothing and she caved.

207
00:09:43,437 --> 00:09:45,406
I wish I was
wearing a body cam,

208
00:09:45,439 --> 00:09:48,242
'cause that's a movie I would
watch every year on my birthday.

209
00:09:49,310 --> 00:09:50,845
We should celebrate this win

210
00:09:50,879 --> 00:09:52,313
by going fishing this weekend.

211
00:09:52,346 --> 00:09:54,015
Ah, not so fast.

212
00:09:54,048 --> 00:09:56,651
That silent negotiation,
that's bad voodoo.

213
00:09:58,186 --> 00:10:00,021
I spent hours with Mom
at that fabric store.

214
00:10:00,054 --> 00:10:02,090
Do you know how many kinds
of corduroy there are?

215
00:10:02,123 --> 00:10:05,860
There's wide wale, pinwale,
pincord, needlecord.

216
00:10:05,894 --> 00:10:07,696
I'm never gonna
be the same.

217
00:10:07,729 --> 00:10:10,932
Oh, here comes Katie.
Hey, Katie.

218
00:10:10,965 --> 00:10:15,169
Oh! So, the man who won't let me
go to the dance says hey.

219
00:10:15,203 --> 00:10:17,706
Hi, Uncle Don, and nobody else.

220
00:10:17,739 --> 00:10:19,440
Hi, Katie.

221
00:10:19,473 --> 00:10:22,043
I like your
needlecord pants.

222
00:10:23,011 --> 00:10:24,979
Thanks, Uncle Don,
and nobody else.

223
00:10:27,248 --> 00:10:29,217
You see how mad she is?

224
00:10:29,250 --> 00:10:31,419
That's how you know I won.

225
00:10:31,452 --> 00:10:33,321
Oh, it's not over yet.

226
00:10:33,354 --> 00:10:35,123
When you mess with
Mother Nature,

227
00:10:35,156 --> 00:10:37,058
there's always
unintended consequences.

228
00:10:37,091 --> 00:10:40,729
This is Jurassic Park stuff
you're screwing around with.

229
00:10:40,762 --> 00:10:43,164
You just don't
understand winning.

230
00:10:43,197 --> 00:10:46,200
It's so unfamiliar,
it scares you.

231
00:10:46,234 --> 00:10:48,069
Hey, babe. Listen, uh,

232
00:10:48,102 --> 00:10:50,471
Don and I were thinking about
going fishing this weekend.

233
00:10:50,504 --> 00:10:52,974
Actually, I was hoping that
you'd go to the paint store

234
00:10:53,007 --> 00:10:54,442
and choose a new color
for the bathroom.

235
00:10:54,475 --> 00:10:57,011
What

236
00:10:57,045 --> 00:11:00,048
Well, you know,
you were so right about Kate,

237
00:11:00,081 --> 00:11:03,251
I realized you should be making
more decisions around here.

238
00:11:03,284 --> 00:11:06,220
No, I shouldn't. What?

239
00:11:06,254 --> 00:11:09,891
T. rex is out
of the pen.

240
00:11:09,924 --> 00:11:12,226
Also, um, look through
these brochures

241
00:11:12,260 --> 00:11:14,462
and choose a summer camp
for the kids.

242
00:11:14,495 --> 00:11:18,499
But I was gonna watch TV.
This stuff is your thing.

243
00:11:18,532 --> 00:11:22,103
Well, now I'm gonna watch TV.
It's my new thing.

244
00:11:23,872 --> 00:11:25,439
Oh, I almost forgot.

245
00:11:25,473 --> 00:11:29,210
Um, can you pick us out
a new bed skirt? Great, thanks.

246
00:11:31,946 --> 00:11:34,315
A bed skirt?

247
00:11:34,348 --> 00:11:37,451
What the hell is a bed skirt?

248
00:11:37,485 --> 00:11:40,721
I think we know who wears
the bed skirt in this family.

249
00:11:47,561 --> 00:11:50,198
Look at all this.
I got to choose paint colors,

250
00:11:50,231 --> 00:11:52,466
summer camps,
some made up thing

251
00:11:52,500 --> 00:11:54,302
called a bed skirt.

252
00:11:54,335 --> 00:11:56,204
What the hell happened?

253
00:11:56,237 --> 00:11:57,305
You messed with nature.

254
00:11:57,338 --> 00:11:59,808
Now you got dinosaurs
running all over the island.

255
00:11:59,841 --> 00:12:02,977
Yeah, I screwed up the whole
balance of our marriage.

256
00:12:03,011 --> 00:12:06,280
Before this, she made
a billion decisions without me.

257
00:12:06,314 --> 00:12:08,449
And I was happy because
I didn't have to chime in,

258
00:12:08,482 --> 00:12:11,152
and she was happy because
she got to decide stuff

259
00:12:11,185 --> 00:12:12,887
without some chump chiming in.

260
00:12:12,921 --> 00:12:15,156
Amen, brother.

261
00:12:15,189 --> 00:12:17,525
I haven't chimed in since 1989.

262
00:12:17,558 --> 00:12:20,294
I bought parachute pants.
Learned my lesson.

263
00:12:20,328 --> 00:12:23,497
Yeah, like I get up
early on Saturdays

264
00:12:23,531 --> 00:12:25,900
to close the drapes
so we can sleep in.

265
00:12:25,934 --> 00:12:28,202
But the drapes are there
because she picked them.

266
00:12:28,236 --> 00:12:30,538
She never asked my opinion,
because I don't have one.

267
00:12:30,571 --> 00:12:31,906
In fact,

268
00:12:31,940 --> 00:12:34,208
gun to my head,
what color are the drapes?

269
00:12:34,242 --> 00:12:35,910
No idea.

270
00:12:35,944 --> 00:12:38,546
But now your opinion's
being respected.

271
00:12:38,579 --> 00:12:40,381
Yeah, and I don't like it.

272
00:12:40,414 --> 00:12:43,384
And all because
I won one discussion.

273
00:12:43,417 --> 00:12:45,820
So, then maybe you need
to have another discussion

274
00:12:45,854 --> 00:12:47,555
and lose that one.

275
00:12:47,588 --> 00:12:50,324
That'll put you back
on the bottom, where you belong.

276
00:12:50,358 --> 00:12:54,195
Ooh, that's not a bad idea.

277
00:12:54,228 --> 00:12:56,564
Yeah. Hey, you want me
to lose a fight?

278
00:12:56,597 --> 00:12:59,267
I'll lose a fight.
This guy's going down.

279
00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:01,435
Now you sound like
a real husband.

280
00:13:02,503 --> 00:13:04,839
I don't think
this is working.

281
00:13:04,873 --> 00:13:06,407
I mean, Adam hasn't
run back in here

282
00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:08,509
telling me that Kate
should go to the dance.

283
00:13:08,542 --> 00:13:10,544
You promised me
total domination.

284
00:13:10,578 --> 00:13:13,581
Just make sure you lose
the next discussion with Adam,

285
00:13:13,614 --> 00:13:16,584
whatever it is, so you can keep
loading him up with decisions.

286
00:13:16,617 --> 00:13:20,421
Okay, but if I end up with
a Van Halen logo on my wall,

287
00:13:20,454 --> 00:13:22,356
you're painting over it.

288
00:13:22,390 --> 00:13:24,859
Okay, Joy just left.
It's time.

289
00:13:24,893 --> 00:13:26,594
Okay, champ, you ready
to lose this thing?

290
00:13:26,627 --> 00:13:28,930
Oh, yeah. I have got
a truly terrible argument.

291
00:13:28,963 --> 00:13:31,199
There's no way I can win.
Ah, that's the spirit.

292
00:13:31,232 --> 00:13:33,034
Now get in there and take
a dive, make us all proud.

293
00:13:33,067 --> 00:13:35,103
Okay.

294
00:13:35,136 --> 00:13:36,304
Hey.

295
00:13:36,337 --> 00:13:38,506
Listen, I have something
I'd like to discuss.

296
00:13:38,539 --> 00:13:40,875
Ooh, great.
I'd love to discuss something.

297
00:13:40,909 --> 00:13:43,544
Okay, well, uh, I was thinking
about the kids' summer camp.

298
00:13:43,577 --> 00:13:45,880
Whatever you're thinking
is right, I'm sure.

299
00:13:45,914 --> 00:13:47,882
No, no, hold on.

300
00:13:47,916 --> 00:13:51,519
I was thinking they
shouldn't go to camp at all.

301
00:13:51,552 --> 00:13:53,487
What?

302
00:13:53,521 --> 00:13:57,525
Yeah. I mean, is it really a
good idea for kids to have fun?

303
00:13:57,558 --> 00:13:59,527
Huh?

304
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:03,131
It'll just make being an
adult that much sadder

305
00:14:03,164 --> 00:14:07,301
when they think back at all
the fun they used to have.

306
00:14:09,337 --> 00:14:11,372
That is quite a theory.

307
00:14:11,405 --> 00:14:13,307
Well, that's what happens
when I make decisions.

308
00:14:13,341 --> 00:14:16,544
Plus, what are we gonna do for
two weeks with no kids, huh?

309
00:14:16,577 --> 00:14:19,914
Take our own vacation?
That's stupid.

310
00:14:19,948 --> 00:14:23,217
That is stupid.

311
00:14:23,251 --> 00:14:25,086
You're right again.

312
00:14:25,119 --> 00:14:27,321
You always make
such good decisions.

313
00:14:27,355 --> 00:14:29,357
No, I don't.
Great job.

314
00:14:31,525 --> 00:14:33,561
Speaking of which,
Kate needs new bras.

315
00:14:33,594 --> 00:14:36,264
Who needs new what, now

316
00:14:36,297 --> 00:14:38,499
Just get on the Internet
and see what you can find.

317
00:14:40,368 --> 00:14:42,636
Teen girl bras?

318
00:14:44,105 --> 00:14:45,539
I don't want to Google that.

319
00:14:45,573 --> 00:14:49,443
We just grounded Teddy
for Googling that!

320
00:14:51,545 --> 00:14:54,182
I never should've used
that stupid silent negotiation.

321
00:14:54,215 --> 00:14:55,583
What were you thinking?

322
00:14:55,616 --> 00:14:58,352
You told me to do it.

323
00:14:58,386 --> 00:15:02,156
I told you what it was;
I didn't tell you to do it.

324
00:15:02,190 --> 00:15:04,692
So, Andi was fine with the
kids staying home all summer?

325
00:15:04,725 --> 00:15:05,994
Yeah.

326
00:15:06,027 --> 00:15:07,661
She said I made
some good points.

327
00:15:07,695 --> 00:15:09,463
And I'll tell you
something, I did not.

328
00:15:10,464 --> 00:15:12,233
She's up to something.

329
00:15:12,266 --> 00:15:15,236
I bet she knows
you used a trick.

330
00:15:15,269 --> 00:15:16,704
Maybe the reason
nobody does it anymore

331
00:15:16,737 --> 00:15:18,706
is because all the wives
figured it out.

332
00:15:18,739 --> 00:15:21,242
That's right.
This is why we stopped doing it.

333
00:15:21,275 --> 00:15:23,277
It unravels marriages.

334
00:15:23,311 --> 00:15:26,747
What?

335
00:15:26,780 --> 00:15:29,417
They evolved,
but we didn't.

336
00:15:29,450 --> 00:15:31,219
Just like Jurassic Park.

337
00:15:31,252 --> 00:15:33,687
Oh, will you, will
you stop with that?

338
00:15:33,721 --> 00:15:35,456
See a different movie.

339
00:15:35,489 --> 00:15:36,991
Why? It explains
everything.

340
00:15:47,635 --> 00:15:49,770
You don't want me
buying Katie's bras.

341
00:15:49,803 --> 00:15:51,439
You're playing dirty.

342
00:15:51,472 --> 00:15:53,207
You played dirty first.

343
00:15:53,241 --> 00:15:54,742
No!

344
00:15:54,775 --> 00:15:56,777
Yeah, you got me.

345
00:15:56,810 --> 00:15:59,280
But, look, I'm already
being punished.

346
00:15:59,313 --> 00:16:01,649
I just want things
to go back to normal.

347
00:16:01,682 --> 00:16:04,652
You pick stuff, I watch TV.

348
00:16:04,685 --> 00:16:07,021
I agree, that's how we work.

349
00:16:07,055 --> 00:16:08,722
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

350
00:16:11,692 --> 00:16:13,294
How do we do that?

351
00:16:13,327 --> 00:16:17,165
I guess we have to go back
to the beginning.

352
00:16:17,198 --> 00:16:19,333
Back to where it all started.

353
00:16:19,367 --> 00:16:21,569
Behind the Dumpster at Chili's?

354
00:16:23,804 --> 00:16:27,408
No! We're never
going back that far.

355
00:16:27,441 --> 00:16:30,244
No, I'm talking about
Kate and the dance.

356
00:16:31,612 --> 00:16:33,781
So, sit down
and we can discuss it.

357
00:16:38,286 --> 00:16:40,621
I still can't believe you guys
are letting me go to the dance.

358
00:16:40,654 --> 00:16:41,822
Thank you so much.

359
00:16:41,855 --> 00:16:46,427
Ah, we went to the chairs, and
the Globetrotters won again.

360
00:16:46,460 --> 00:16:48,096
Oh, I forgot my phone.

361
00:16:49,730 --> 00:16:51,699
I am back, baby.

362
00:16:51,732 --> 00:16:54,768
And now we have a pink bathroom
in our house, that I love.

363
00:16:54,802 --> 00:16:56,537
Oh, technically it's mauve.

364
00:16:56,570 --> 00:16:59,340
I am thrilled to
say I do not care.

365
00:17:01,242 --> 00:17:04,078
That must be Kate's date.

366
00:17:04,112 --> 00:17:06,714
I don't know why,
but I'm feeling nachos.

367
00:17:07,681 --> 00:17:11,185
Hey. What's up?

368
00:17:11,219 --> 00:17:12,653
You're a giant.

369
00:17:14,655 --> 00:17:15,689
Dad, your
friend's here.

370
00:17:17,391 --> 00:17:18,692
Is Kate ready?

371
00:17:18,726 --> 00:17:20,594
Uh, Adam?

372
00:17:20,628 --> 00:17:22,263
Yeah. Uh, hey, big guy.

373
00:17:22,296 --> 00:17:25,799
Katie will be out in a minute.
Yeah, okay.

374
00:17:25,833 --> 00:17:27,501
We can't let our daughter
go out alone

375
00:17:27,535 --> 00:17:29,337
with that-that lumberjack
in a tux.

376
00:17:29,370 --> 00:17:31,539
I mean, did you see him?
He filled up the whole doorway!

377
00:17:31,572 --> 00:17:32,740
All right, all right.
Don't panic, don't panic.

378
00:17:32,773 --> 00:17:35,376
Oh, okay.
I'll go with them.

379
00:17:35,409 --> 00:17:37,811
Yeah. Although,
he looked pretty strong.

380
00:17:39,580 --> 00:17:41,549
I wish I still had
that bear spray.

381
00:17:41,582 --> 00:17:43,217
Katie, your date's here!

382
00:17:43,251 --> 00:17:44,818
You'll go
Yeah, sure. Absolutely, yeah.

383
00:17:44,852 --> 00:17:46,187
Apparently,
they don't have a problem

384
00:17:46,220 --> 00:17:47,855
with grown men
going to their dances.

385
00:17:47,888 --> 00:17:49,390
You're the best.

386
00:17:50,424 --> 00:17:52,526
Maybe later we can
swing by Chili's.

387
00:17:54,395 --> 00:17:56,730
Uh, okay.
Uh, come on, we're going!

388
00:17:56,764 --> 00:17:58,766
Wait, you're going, too?

389
00:17:58,799 --> 00:18:02,736
Damn right I am.
I call shotgun.

390
00:18:02,770 --> 00:18:04,705
Chili's. You're so naughty.

391
00:18:11,512 --> 00:18:13,814
Hey. How'd it go?

392
00:18:13,847 --> 00:18:15,216
I had a blast.

393
00:18:15,249 --> 00:18:17,485
I thought Danny and I
kind of had a spark.

394
00:18:17,518 --> 00:18:20,888
Yeah, you two were so cute
in the photo booth together.

395
00:18:23,624 --> 00:18:26,827
Ah. You'll thank
me someday.

396
00:18:27,928 --> 00:18:30,164
No, she won't.

397
00:18:30,198 --> 00:18:32,300
You didn't embarrass her
too bad, did you?

398
00:18:32,333 --> 00:18:33,801
Embarrass her?

399
00:18:33,834 --> 00:18:35,836
I won the dance contest.

400
00:18:52,953 --> 00:18:54,855
Oh! Oh!

401
00:18:56,657 --> 00:18:58,359
Now we're even.

402
00:19:00,361 --> 00:19:03,197
Very funny.
See you at prom!

403
00:19:07,901 --> 00:19:11,872
Captioning sponsored by
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404
00:19:11,905 --> 00:19:15,909
Captioned by
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