1
00:00:03,378 --> 00:00:05,445
This is such a fun way to celebrate

2
00:00:05,447 --> 00:00:07,413
you guys finishing the mini mall.

3
00:00:07,415 --> 00:00:09,816
- Hey, did Lisa say what our next project is?
- Mm-mm.

4
00:00:09,818 --> 00:00:13,353
The next project I
will be working on is...

5
00:00:13,355 --> 00:00:14,854
myself!

6
00:00:14,856 --> 00:00:16,441
I'm going on sabbatical.

7
00:00:16,466 --> 00:00:18,257
So what are we gonna be building?

8
00:00:18,259 --> 00:00:19,363
Well, I don't know about you two,

9
00:00:19,388 --> 00:00:21,321
but I'll be building a new me.

10
00:00:21,930 --> 00:00:24,340
She might have to take that
thing down to the studs.

11
00:00:26,816 --> 00:00:28,468
We just lost our jobs.

12
00:00:28,470 --> 00:00:30,403
This commercial is
important to Burns Brothers,

13
00:00:30,405 --> 00:00:32,271
so I think I should meet
the guy who's playing me.

14
00:00:32,273 --> 00:00:33,959
I'm Leif Forrest. I'm sorry?

15
00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:35,759
Leif... Forrest.

16
00:00:35,761 --> 00:00:37,594
(LAUGHING)

17
00:00:37,810 --> 00:00:40,175
- What's the matter?
- I just got laid off.

18
00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:42,199
I guess now neither of us are working.

19
00:00:44,817 --> 00:00:45,917
(HORN HONKING)

20
00:00:45,942 --> 00:00:48,402
Oh, okay, kids. Your carpool's here.

21
00:00:48,427 --> 00:00:50,173
You guys aren't going anywhere today?

22
00:00:50,175 --> 00:00:53,010
Teddy, I told you we're
temporarily unemployed.

23
00:00:53,012 --> 00:00:54,511
I want to be unemployed.

24
00:00:54,513 --> 00:00:56,485
Oh, you will be.

25
00:00:58,258 --> 00:01:00,740
Okay, let's not be so honest. Come on.

26
00:01:02,421 --> 00:01:04,748
So we're busting our humps all day

27
00:01:04,773 --> 00:01:06,139
while you two get to sit around?

28
00:01:06,141 --> 00:01:08,468
Yeah, it's like we're the kids now.

29
00:01:09,757 --> 00:01:11,645
Bring us back some food and money.

30
00:01:13,515 --> 00:01:15,148
- (GIGGLES)
- (GIGGLES)

31
00:01:16,272 --> 00:01:17,940
Ah, look at us.

32
00:01:17,965 --> 00:01:19,765
We got the house to ourselves.

33
00:01:19,790 --> 00:01:22,189
You know, we should
make the most of this.

34
00:01:22,191 --> 00:01:24,357
Yeah, well, we're not
gonna be unemployed long.

35
00:01:24,359 --> 00:01:27,460
I got my commercial running,
you sent out résumés.

36
00:01:27,462 --> 00:01:31,458
Oh, and they really stand out
'cause they include a bribe.

37
00:01:31,483 --> 00:01:34,401
See, I clipped a Starbucks
gift card to each one.

38
00:01:34,881 --> 00:01:37,070
Andi, those things cost money.

39
00:01:37,072 --> 00:01:39,606
Not if you don't put any money on it.

40
00:01:40,944 --> 00:01:42,509
That's my girl.

41
00:01:42,534 --> 00:01:46,379
- (LAUGHS)
- My thrifty, morally-challenged girl.

42
00:01:46,381 --> 00:01:49,015
- (LAUGHS)
- See, this is what I'm talking about.

43
00:01:49,017 --> 00:01:51,418
We should just enjoy being together.

44
00:01:51,420 --> 00:01:54,421
Yeah. You're my favorite person.

45
00:01:54,423 --> 00:01:56,456
I'm your favorite person.

46
00:01:56,458 --> 00:01:58,009
We're like those two
trees in the backyard

47
00:01:58,034 --> 00:01:59,793
that grow closer together every year.

48
00:01:59,795 --> 00:02:02,767
Oh. That is poetic.

49
00:02:02,792 --> 00:02:04,097
I love your stories.

50
00:02:04,099 --> 00:02:06,399
- It's so charming how you see the world.
- Oh.

51
00:02:06,401 --> 00:02:08,845
You know, that boy tree
is ten years younger

52
00:02:08,870 --> 00:02:10,804
than the girl tree.
Pretty good for her, huh?

53
00:02:10,806 --> 00:02:12,239
Yeah.

54
00:02:12,241 --> 00:02:13,874
(BOTH LAUGHING)

55
00:02:13,876 --> 00:02:16,009
Oh, yeah, come on. Get
those puppies up here.

56
00:02:16,011 --> 00:02:18,278
- (LAUGHS)
- So... (CLEARS THROAT)

57
00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:19,746
What should we do today?

58
00:02:19,748 --> 00:02:23,049
I say that we watch TV, and only get up

59
00:02:23,051 --> 00:02:25,721
when we need to replace
the batteries in the remote.

60
00:02:27,128 --> 00:02:28,527
I do not deserve you.

61
00:02:28,552 --> 00:02:29,951
(GIGGLES)

62
00:02:30,339 --> 00:02:32,225
No man does.

63
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:42,802
Yesterday when I was getting the mail,

64
00:02:42,804 --> 00:02:46,973
I saw this caterpillar inching
his way down the sidewalk.

65
00:02:47,527 --> 00:02:48,942
It looked exactly like...

66
00:02:48,944 --> 00:02:50,577
BOTH: The neighbor lady's mustache.

67
00:02:50,579 --> 00:02:51,945
Yeah.

68
00:02:53,956 --> 00:02:56,058
You've told that story twice.

69
00:02:57,613 --> 00:02:59,558
Thought I was poetic.

70
00:02:59,761 --> 00:03:02,022
People repeat poems.

71
00:03:02,024 --> 00:03:04,925
Might I remind you of the
"Man from Nantucket" series?

72
00:03:04,927 --> 00:03:06,878
As in, "There once was
a man from Nantucket"?

73
00:03:06,903 --> 00:03:09,437
Okay, yeah, yeah, I got it.

74
00:03:11,266 --> 00:03:13,173
(SIGHS)

75
00:03:15,837 --> 00:03:19,205
Uh... what's this?

76
00:03:20,446 --> 00:03:22,179
My puppies. (LAUGHS)

77
00:03:22,540 --> 00:03:24,748
(BARKS): Arf, arf.

78
00:03:27,115 --> 00:03:29,551
Foot person gets the remote, too?

79
00:03:29,576 --> 00:03:31,518
Ugh. I guess the rich get richer.

80
00:03:32,990 --> 00:03:34,426
What's wrong?

81
00:03:34,451 --> 00:03:36,623
I just can't sit around all day

82
00:03:36,625 --> 00:03:38,325
with your hot feet in my lap

83
00:03:38,327 --> 00:03:40,093
watching reruns of
the<i> Gilmore Girls.</i>

84
00:03:40,095 --> 00:03:42,295
I get it. You had your daughter young.

85
00:03:42,297 --> 00:03:44,864
Move on. You're making me crazy!

86
00:03:47,601 --> 00:03:50,081
Okay, well, you want to
watch<i> Rush Hour 3</i> again

87
00:03:50,106 --> 00:03:52,117
so you can say every line
along with the actors?

88
00:03:53,106 --> 00:03:54,574
I do that?

89
00:03:54,576 --> 00:03:56,776
(CHUCKLING): Yeah. It's funny.

90
00:03:56,778 --> 00:03:59,066
- At first.
- Oh.

91
00:03:59,715 --> 00:04:03,783
Look, I love you very much, but...

92
00:04:04,477 --> 00:04:05,752
Okay, I'm just gonna say it.

93
00:04:05,754 --> 00:04:07,554
I'm sick of being around you.

94
00:04:08,234 --> 00:04:10,538
That is music to my ears.

95
00:04:11,193 --> 00:04:13,226
I'm sick of being around you, too!

96
00:04:13,228 --> 00:04:14,661
(LAUGHS)

97
00:04:14,663 --> 00:04:16,262
We are so cute.

98
00:04:17,021 --> 00:04:20,183
- Hey, so, how do we get you back to work?
- Ugh.

99
00:04:20,208 --> 00:04:22,969
You know, I mean, do we go
out and knock on some doors

100
00:04:22,971 --> 00:04:24,671
and see who needs new kitchens?

101
00:04:24,673 --> 00:04:26,649
The quickest way to
put me back to work is

102
00:04:26,674 --> 00:04:29,442
to get Lisa McCaffrey
out of her cuckoo's nest.

103
00:04:30,445 --> 00:04:32,412
So let's take her out for drinks.

104
00:04:32,414 --> 00:04:34,914
Maybe we can speed this whole thing up,

105
00:04:34,916 --> 00:04:37,776
you know, patch the cracks in her attic.

106
00:04:38,754 --> 00:04:39,919
That's a great idea.

107
00:04:39,921 --> 00:04:42,489
- We're a great team.
- We are.

108
00:04:42,491 --> 00:04:44,224
We were meant to be together.

109
00:04:44,226 --> 00:04:45,964
Just not all the time.

110
00:04:46,815 --> 00:04:49,362
- Exactly.
- (BOTH LAUGH)

111
00:04:49,364 --> 00:04:51,274
I'm gonna go read a book in the pantry.

112
00:04:52,203 --> 00:04:53,800
Anywhere but here, baby.

113
00:04:53,802 --> 00:04:55,702
Ha!

114
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,450
I'm just saying, if you'd
seen the caterpillar,

115
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:10,062
you'd like the story better.

116
00:05:10,087 --> 00:05:12,827
It looked exactly like a mustache.

117
00:05:12,852 --> 00:05:14,847
It was Tom Selleck on a sidewalk.

118
00:05:14,849 --> 00:05:16,448
Stay focused, okay?

119
00:05:16,450 --> 00:05:17,816
We've got to cheer Lisa up

120
00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:20,261
so we can get both of you back to work.

121
00:05:20,286 --> 00:05:22,199
This morning, I needed
alone time so bad,

122
00:05:22,224 --> 00:05:23,725
almost went on a walk.

123
00:05:23,750 --> 00:05:25,474
A walk, Adam.

124
00:05:27,194 --> 00:05:28,827
Here she comes. Okay, remember,

125
00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:30,061
this is just a patch job.

126
00:05:30,086 --> 00:05:32,867
We're not responsible for
any structural problems.

127
00:05:32,892 --> 00:05:34,566
And no matter what she says,

128
00:05:34,568 --> 00:05:35,901
we tell her she's making progress, okay?

129
00:05:35,903 --> 00:05:37,462
- Got it.
- Hey, hey!

130
00:05:37,487 --> 00:05:38,953
- Hi.
- Hello, you two.

131
00:05:38,978 --> 00:05:40,217
- Lisa.
- (LAUGHS)

132
00:05:40,242 --> 00:05:41,875
- (SIGHS)
- Ah, it's so good to see you.

133
00:05:41,900 --> 00:05:43,041
- How-how you doing?
- Oh.

134
00:05:43,043 --> 00:05:45,093
Wildly depressed.

135
00:05:46,046 --> 00:05:48,080
I haven't felt this
lonely since my divorce.

136
00:05:48,082 --> 00:05:50,349
I started talking to my
reflection in the mirror,

137
00:05:50,351 --> 00:05:51,850
but conversation is difficult

138
00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:54,519
because we keep interrupting each other.

139
00:05:55,179 --> 00:05:58,239
That right there... that
is textbook progress.

140
00:05:58,264 --> 00:06:00,726
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. I say it's
time to get back on the job.

141
00:06:00,728 --> 00:06:02,394
Yeah, that's true. Yeah, yeah.

142
00:06:02,396 --> 00:06:03,528
Studies show

143
00:06:03,553 --> 00:06:06,404
that people who quit working
die almost immediately.

144
00:06:06,429 --> 00:06:08,467
Hmm. Well, the way I've been feeling,

145
00:06:08,469 --> 00:06:10,769
it could be months
before I get back to work.

146
00:06:10,771 --> 00:06:13,098
- Hmm.
- Well...

147
00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:15,580
You know what? Uh, I should go.

148
00:06:15,605 --> 00:06:18,844
It's, uh, difficult for me to
be around couples right now,

149
00:06:18,846 --> 00:06:21,113
especially old ones like you

150
00:06:21,115 --> 00:06:24,284
who've made it through most
of their lives together.

151
00:06:26,762 --> 00:06:28,353
Okay, bye.

152
00:06:32,621 --> 00:06:34,960
That's the meanest
compliment we've ever gotten.

153
00:06:35,489 --> 00:06:38,063
Yeah, but at least now
we know what she needs.

154
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:39,747
Yeah. A straitjacket.

155
00:06:40,278 --> 00:06:41,878
No. A man.

156
00:06:41,903 --> 00:06:43,669
Yeah, a man to put on the straitjacket,

157
00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:45,356
'cause you can't put
those on by yourself.

158
00:06:45,381 --> 00:06:47,406
That's why magicians have assistants.

159
00:06:47,408 --> 00:06:50,008
Okay, look, Lisa said she
was too lonely to work,

160
00:06:50,010 --> 00:06:52,544
and I get it. It's-it's...
it's hard on your own.

161
00:06:52,546 --> 00:06:56,915
So if we fix her up with
someone, we fix<i> her.</i>

162
00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:59,985
Yeah, having someone at
home really makes you want

163
00:06:59,987 --> 00:07:01,520
to get out of the house.

164
00:07:01,522 --> 00:07:03,255
Let's make a love connection, Adam.

165
00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:04,990
Great. All right, let's go home.

166
00:07:04,992 --> 00:07:06,491
I'll make a list of
some guys I don't like.

167
00:07:06,493 --> 00:07:08,554
Spit that out. We can't
afford to eat here.

168
00:07:11,231 --> 00:07:12,576
I can't think of anyone

169
00:07:12,601 --> 00:07:14,866
I dislike enough to set up with Lisa.

170
00:07:15,170 --> 00:07:18,570
Do we know anyone who
just got out of prison?

171
00:07:18,572 --> 00:07:20,505
I mean, you know,
those guys aren't picky,

172
00:07:20,507 --> 00:07:22,307
and they're used to crazy roommates.

173
00:07:22,309 --> 00:07:25,197
Okay, uh, hey, listen, before
we go in there, fair warning.

174
00:07:25,222 --> 00:07:27,152
I am laying down on that couch.

175
00:07:27,177 --> 00:07:29,427
Now, it's fine if you
want to sit on top of me,

176
00:07:29,452 --> 00:07:31,591
but just be prepared to
finish what you start.

177
00:07:31,622 --> 00:07:32,851
Okay.

178
00:07:34,706 --> 00:07:36,989
Aw, come on!

179
00:07:38,081 --> 00:07:40,192
Unemployment blows.

180
00:07:40,194 --> 00:07:41,526
Yeah, tell me about it.

181
00:07:41,528 --> 00:07:43,595
I'm looking at a guy with
my pillow between his legs.

182
00:07:47,192 --> 00:07:48,934
Check it out.<i> Rush Hour 3.</i>

183
00:07:48,936 --> 00:07:51,703
- Ooh.
- Hey.

184
00:07:51,705 --> 00:07:53,807
Just got dark. That means it's not weird

185
00:07:53,832 --> 00:07:55,899
for me to go to bed. Good night, guys.

186
00:07:57,415 --> 00:07:58,798
(GROANS)

187
00:07:59,501 --> 00:08:02,114
- Hey, so listen, we just saw Lisa.
- Yeah.

188
00:08:02,116 --> 00:08:04,416
She's depressed because she's lonely.

189
00:08:04,418 --> 00:08:08,086
Andi thinks we can get her back
to work if we find her a guy.

190
00:08:08,463 --> 00:08:09,844
That makes sense.

191
00:08:09,869 --> 00:08:11,323
When she realized she couldn't have me,

192
00:08:11,325 --> 00:08:13,174
she started going downhill.

193
00:08:14,142 --> 00:08:15,494
So who's the unlucky fella?

194
00:08:15,496 --> 00:08:16,862
Well, I don't know yet,

195
00:08:16,864 --> 00:08:18,430
but it shouldn't be
that hard to find one.

196
00:08:18,432 --> 00:08:20,098
- Yeah.
- Getting a girl is hard.

197
00:08:20,100 --> 00:08:22,167
Getting a guy who<i>
wants</i> a girl is easy.

198
00:08:22,169 --> 00:08:24,636
All we got to do is
tell him we got a girl.

199
00:08:24,638 --> 00:08:26,271
Yeah, I mean, we got the beer.

200
00:08:26,273 --> 00:08:28,340
We're just looking for the party.

201
00:08:28,342 --> 00:08:29,941
Yeah. Yeah.

202
00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:31,643
Look, I know playing
matchmaker's a little weird,

203
00:08:31,645 --> 00:08:33,378
- but I got to do something.
- Yeah.

204
00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:35,447
Andi and I are spending
all our time together,

205
00:08:35,449 --> 00:08:38,650
and I just discovered...
I can be a lot to take.

206
00:08:39,036 --> 00:08:41,653
Yeah, me, too, but I
didn't have to discover.

207
00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:43,688
Marcy told me ten
minutes before I got here.

208
00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:46,058
- Hmm.
- Yeah. When I walk in the door,

209
00:08:46,060 --> 00:08:48,821
I want my wife to be happy to see me,

210
00:08:48,846 --> 00:08:51,767
and the key to that is less of me.

211
00:08:51,909 --> 00:08:52,742
All right.

212
00:08:52,767 --> 00:08:54,933
I just wish we had
another place to hang out.

213
00:08:54,935 --> 00:08:56,268
(SIGHS)

214
00:08:56,270 --> 00:08:57,803
Hey, you got the basement.

215
00:08:57,805 --> 00:08:59,538
Let's move a couch and a TV down there.

216
00:08:59,540 --> 00:09:01,973
Oh, I'd love to, but it
won't fit. There's no room.

217
00:09:01,975 --> 00:09:03,575
- Aah.
- Andi's giant treadmill's down there.

218
00:09:03,577 --> 00:09:05,677
(SIGHS) Does she use it?

219
00:09:05,679 --> 00:09:07,077
Shh!

220
00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:10,082
We don't talk about it.

221
00:09:10,981 --> 00:09:12,957
Well, so ask her if
you can get rid of it.

222
00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:15,220
What are you, a newlywed?

223
00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:16,855
- No.
- Huh?

224
00:09:16,857 --> 00:09:20,011
Everyone knows you can't talk
to women about exercising.

225
00:09:20,036 --> 00:09:22,589
The last time I mentioned
it, it did not go well.

226
00:09:25,143 --> 00:09:28,867
Hey, yoga pants, heading down
to the basement to exercise?

227
00:09:31,046 --> 00:09:32,968
Well, I am now.

228
00:09:37,538 --> 00:09:39,010
That was a quiet weekend.

229
00:09:39,012 --> 00:09:41,807
- Ooh.
- I know what I'll do.

230
00:09:41,832 --> 00:09:44,216
I'll just throw it away,
and I won't say anything.

231
00:09:44,559 --> 00:09:45,717
That could work.

232
00:09:45,719 --> 00:09:48,220
That's what I do when
Marcy cooks a meatloaf.

233
00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:54,069
LOWELL: <i>I'm so glad</i>

234
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:56,631
you guys called. I've been
stuck home with my kids.

235
00:09:56,656 --> 00:10:00,132
They tell the same
stories over and over.

236
00:10:00,508 --> 00:10:03,235
Lowell, if it's a good
story, it never gets old.

237
00:10:04,140 --> 00:10:05,170
Okay, come on, guys.

238
00:10:05,172 --> 00:10:06,728
We got to figure out
who to set Lisa up with.

239
00:10:06,753 --> 00:10:08,507
- Mm.
- We need a gentleman.

240
00:10:08,509 --> 00:10:10,041
I'll check out the
bathroom, and come back

241
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:11,877
with the first guy who washes his hands.

242
00:10:15,720 --> 00:10:17,433
Okay, check out the guy behind me.

243
00:10:17,458 --> 00:10:18,658
His date is a book.

244
00:10:18,683 --> 00:10:20,015
- Watch this.
- Oh, yeah.

245
00:10:22,541 --> 00:10:25,011
Hey, uh, I noticed you
were alone, and, uh...

246
00:10:25,036 --> 00:10:27,292
we've got a girl.

247
00:10:28,234 --> 00:10:30,195
That sounds creepy.

248
00:10:30,197 --> 00:10:33,798
(CHUCKLES): No, no. She's
not in a cage or anything.

249
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,567
Listen, I know the manager.

250
00:10:35,815 --> 00:10:37,157
What's your name?

251
00:10:37,189 --> 00:10:39,651
Uh, Lowell. My name's Lowell.

252
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,412
I think we might need
the actual girl here

253
00:10:47,414 --> 00:10:49,114
- for this to work.
- Yeah.

254
00:10:49,116 --> 00:10:51,709
You're-you're overcomplicating it.

255
00:10:51,734 --> 00:10:53,518
- See leather jacket over there?
- Yeah.

256
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,187
I'll just tell him what
I wanted people to tell me

257
00:10:55,189 --> 00:10:56,488
when I was sitting alone in bars.

258
00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:57,765
Watch.

259
00:11:01,421 --> 00:11:02,561
Hey, big guy.

260
00:11:02,563 --> 00:11:04,029
You look strong.

261
00:11:06,445 --> 00:11:07,732
What'd you say to me?

262
00:11:07,734 --> 00:11:09,534
Nothing. My name's Lowell.

263
00:11:10,968 --> 00:11:12,802
Yeah, I-I'm out of
here. I'm going home.

264
00:11:12,827 --> 00:11:14,773
Wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait. Sit down.

265
00:11:14,775 --> 00:11:17,242
We got to find a guy for Lisa
so we can get back to work.

266
00:11:17,244 --> 00:11:19,544
(SIGHS) The men's room was a bad idea.

267
00:11:19,546 --> 00:11:20,812
I made a mistake by leading with,

268
00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:22,733
"Are you looking for a good time?"

269
00:11:23,784 --> 00:11:26,045
Frankly, I'm lucky to be alive.

270
00:11:26,334 --> 00:11:28,086
Well, we're not doing
much better out here.

271
00:11:28,088 --> 00:11:30,922
Oh, and if anybody asks,
your name is not Lowell.

272
00:11:32,341 --> 00:11:33,992
Wait, wait, what about this guy?

273
00:11:33,994 --> 00:11:35,360
The chicken wing model.

274
00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:37,462
That's Leif Forrest, the actor we hired

275
00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:39,097
to replace you in the commercial.

276
00:11:39,099 --> 00:11:41,401
Lisa would like him.
He's single and handsome.

277
00:11:41,426 --> 00:11:43,368
We fired him. He doesn't like us.

278
00:11:43,370 --> 00:11:46,071
But he likes me. He accidentally
put me into a group text,

279
00:11:46,073 --> 00:11:48,269
and I've been quite active.

280
00:11:49,401 --> 00:11:52,244
Well, if you can get him
on board, I'm all for it.

281
00:11:52,246 --> 00:11:53,979
Great. I'll have him meet us for lunch.

282
00:11:53,981 --> 00:11:55,614
We don't want one of these guys, anyway.

283
00:11:55,616 --> 00:11:57,415
Word in the bathroom
is there's a creep here

284
00:11:57,417 --> 00:11:59,636
saying he's got a lady in a cage.

285
00:12:08,019 --> 00:12:09,318
- Hey.
- Hey.

286
00:12:09,320 --> 00:12:10,753
Okay, so, Marcy and I

287
00:12:10,755 --> 00:12:12,254
will get Lisa on board
with this blind date thing.

288
00:12:12,279 --> 00:12:13,593
Okay, great. And then Don and I

289
00:12:13,618 --> 00:12:15,618
will work on Pittsburgh's
gift to acting,

290
00:12:15,643 --> 00:12:17,276
Leif Forrest.

291
00:12:17,692 --> 00:12:19,628
If we play this right, I will have a job

292
00:12:19,630 --> 00:12:21,230
to go to every day.

293
00:12:21,232 --> 00:12:23,032
It's gonna be nice to miss you, baby.

294
00:12:23,034 --> 00:12:25,130
(CHUCKLES)

295
00:12:26,172 --> 00:12:27,972
Oh, Andi, come quick!

296
00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:30,064
Is it the caterpillar?

297
00:12:31,442 --> 00:12:33,530
How do you not want to see it?

298
00:12:35,847 --> 00:12:37,213
ADAM: <i>Okay, listen.</i>

299
00:12:37,215 --> 00:12:38,681
All we got to do is convince this guy

300
00:12:38,683 --> 00:12:39,776
to hook up with Lisa

301
00:12:39,801 --> 00:12:41,434
and take a ride down Bonkers Boulevard.

302
00:12:41,436 --> 00:12:42,636
(CHUCKLES)

303
00:12:42,638 --> 00:12:44,137
Go for a swim in Lunatic Lake.

304
00:12:44,139 --> 00:12:45,305
(LAUGHS): Yeah.

305
00:12:45,307 --> 00:12:46,773
Hop on the Screw Loose Caboose.

306
00:12:46,775 --> 00:12:48,650
- (CHUCKLES)
- Oh, shh, shh, shh. Here he is.

307
00:12:48,675 --> 00:12:51,111
- Adam, Don, you remember Leif.
- Sure we do.

308
00:12:51,113 --> 00:12:52,646
From when we fired you.

309
00:12:52,648 --> 00:12:55,582
Ah, it's okay. I'm used to hostility.

310
00:12:55,584 --> 00:12:58,084
Regular looking people don't
know how to deal with me.

311
00:12:58,731 --> 00:13:00,220
Yeah. Uh, have a seat.

312
00:13:00,222 --> 00:13:01,286
Okay.

313
00:13:03,158 --> 00:13:04,691
(CLEARS THROAT) Um...

314
00:13:04,693 --> 00:13:06,059
Leif, I know we've had our differences,

315
00:13:06,061 --> 00:13:08,480
but the reason we brought you here is...

316
00:13:08,505 --> 00:13:10,163
we've got a girl.

317
00:13:10,450 --> 00:13:11,931
Never been in a cage.

318
00:13:11,933 --> 00:13:13,933
She's cage-free, like those chickens.

319
00:13:15,122 --> 00:13:17,170
Look, she's a friend of
ours, and she's single.

320
00:13:17,172 --> 00:13:19,372
And my gut tells me she
has not been mingled with

321
00:13:19,374 --> 00:13:21,095
in quite some time.

322
00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:22,776
And we thought you might
be a good match for her.

323
00:13:22,778 --> 00:13:24,744
Yeah. We felt bad for firing you.

324
00:13:24,746 --> 00:13:27,580
The least we could do is
find you a lovemaking partner.

325
00:13:28,768 --> 00:13:30,784
I'm listening.

326
00:13:31,128 --> 00:13:33,409
So, Adam and I couldn't help but notice

327
00:13:33,434 --> 00:13:36,156
that you're sort of missing
a companion in your life.

328
00:13:36,158 --> 00:13:38,558
You know, and we both love
being in relationships.

329
00:13:38,560 --> 00:13:40,060
(CHUCKLES) Most of the time.

330
00:13:40,062 --> 00:13:42,195
But, um, we thought we could help.

331
00:13:42,197 --> 00:13:44,147
Oh, you would do that?

332
00:13:44,172 --> 00:13:45,725
Well, it might be nice

333
00:13:45,750 --> 00:13:47,975
to share my life with someone special.

334
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,719
Well, great. So what kind
of man are you looking for?

335
00:13:50,744 --> 00:13:53,640
Hmm. A handsome doctor.

336
00:13:53,642 --> 00:13:56,011
Well, I don't want to
be shallow about this.

337
00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:57,821
Just handsome.

338
00:13:58,989 --> 00:14:00,447
I can't believe you're single.

339
00:14:00,449 --> 00:14:03,550
- (CHUCKLES) It's just...
- (MIMICS EXPLOSION)

340
00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:04,818
And I've always had a thing

341
00:14:04,820 --> 00:14:07,604
for spirited, unpredictable women.

342
00:14:08,384 --> 00:14:10,323
Oh, really?

343
00:14:10,325 --> 00:14:13,860
I know it sounds
weird, but I like crazy.

344
00:14:13,862 --> 00:14:15,729
(CHUCKLES) Well, I know a crazy

345
00:14:15,731 --> 00:14:18,732
- that might like you.
- (CHUCKLES)

346
00:14:18,734 --> 00:14:21,401
I also want a guy who's
financially dependent on me

347
00:14:21,403 --> 00:14:25,939
so I can have the upper hand
and constantly lord it over him.

348
00:14:26,717 --> 00:14:28,908
My God, you're a monster.

349
00:14:29,555 --> 00:14:30,787
Of love. (CHUCKLES)

350
00:14:30,812 --> 00:14:33,179
Huh? Right. Yes, a...

351
00:14:33,181 --> 00:14:37,117
a cuddly, bone-chilling love monster.

352
00:14:38,220 --> 00:14:41,722
Not only is our friend
delightfully unstable,

353
00:14:42,027 --> 00:14:44,457
she also happens to earn
a pretty good living.

354
00:14:44,459 --> 00:14:46,714
(EXHALES) That's great.

355
00:14:46,808 --> 00:14:47,360
It's tough

356
00:14:47,362 --> 00:14:49,295
making ends meet as
an actor in Pittsburgh.

357
00:14:49,297 --> 00:14:51,264
They don't appreciate art around here.

358
00:14:51,266 --> 00:14:53,867
I mean, I can do seven different faces,

359
00:14:53,869 --> 00:14:56,102
and they are all totally different.

360
00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:57,637
They're really good. Show them.

361
00:14:57,639 --> 00:14:59,144
Do angry.

362
00:14:59,535 --> 00:15:01,841
You had to pick the one that I can't do.

363
00:15:01,843 --> 00:15:04,144
That seemed angry to me.

364
00:15:04,146 --> 00:15:06,079
(LAUGHING): Well, all right.

365
00:15:06,081 --> 00:15:08,126
That makes eight.

366
00:15:09,751 --> 00:15:11,161
So, are you in?

367
00:15:14,159 --> 00:15:16,026
We're doing it.

368
00:15:18,623 --> 00:15:20,460
- Thanks for coming, Leif.
- Sure.

369
00:15:20,462 --> 00:15:21,728
She's a rich nutjob.

370
00:15:21,730 --> 00:15:23,592
I'm just glad you called me first.

371
00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,801
He's so pretty, it's a
shame to give him away.

372
00:15:28,624 --> 00:15:29,536
Hey.

373
00:15:29,538 --> 00:15:31,571
- Eyes over here, mama.
- Oh.

374
00:15:31,573 --> 00:15:33,106
Uh, why don't you guys
go into the living room,

375
00:15:33,108 --> 00:15:34,866
have some hors d'oeuvres,
and we'll be right in.

376
00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:36,009
So, Leif,

377
00:15:36,011 --> 00:15:37,177
what kind of name is that?

378
00:15:37,179 --> 00:15:38,803
Oh, it's my first name.

379
00:15:42,902 --> 00:15:43,971
You know,

380
00:15:43,996 --> 00:15:45,485
I think this could actually work.

381
00:15:45,487 --> 00:15:47,385
Lisa's an emotional iceberg,

382
00:15:47,410 --> 00:15:49,122
and he's got the brain of a penguin.

383
00:15:50,433 --> 00:15:52,458
Yeah, if these two hit it
off, she's going back to work,

384
00:15:52,460 --> 00:15:54,160
which means you're going back to work.

385
00:15:54,162 --> 00:15:55,295
Yeah, which means I'll have a bunch

386
00:15:55,297 --> 00:15:56,496
- of new stories to tell you.
- Yeah.

387
00:15:56,498 --> 00:15:57,864
And you'll be telling them

388
00:15:57,866 --> 00:15:59,566
- without my feet in your lap.
- Yeah.

389
00:15:59,568 --> 00:16:01,556
All right, let's go close this deal.

390
00:16:01,667 --> 00:16:02,876
(KNOCK AT DOOR)

391
00:16:03,103 --> 00:16:05,672
Ooh, that must be her.

392
00:16:05,674 --> 00:16:07,969
Leif, here comes the rest of your life.

393
00:16:07,994 --> 00:16:09,409
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

394
00:16:09,411 --> 00:16:10,743
I-I'm not ready to meet her.

395
00:16:10,745 --> 00:16:12,145
You haven't even told me her name yet.

396
00:16:12,147 --> 00:16:14,013
Oh, sorry about that.
Yeah, her name is...

397
00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:15,275
Lisa?!

398
00:16:15,470 --> 00:16:17,817
Wow, great guess.

399
00:16:18,126 --> 00:16:19,485
Leif?!

400
00:16:19,487 --> 00:16:21,818
Wait, you-you guys know each other?

401
00:16:21,843 --> 00:16:23,132
Is that a good thing or a...

402
00:16:23,157 --> 00:16:25,210
- You son of a bitch.
- Got it.

403
00:16:26,528 --> 00:16:29,178
You set me up with my ex-husband.

404
00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:34,767
Who cheated on me with
a 22-year-old actress

405
00:16:34,769 --> 00:16:37,704
he met working at a car show.

406
00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:40,340
I-I didn't know we
couldn't date other people.

407
00:16:40,342 --> 00:16:43,076
I just thought we couldn't
marry other people.

408
00:16:43,746 --> 00:16:46,446
Uh, hey, h-hold on,
hold on. He's changed.

409
00:16:46,448 --> 00:16:47,747
Yeah. Did you know

410
00:16:47,749 --> 00:16:50,573
he's got a steady job
as a chicken wing model?

411
00:16:50,598 --> 00:16:54,053
- Huh? Everybody loves chicken wings.
- Yeah.

412
00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:58,157
I'm leaving. Thank you so much
for setting up this reunion.

413
00:16:58,159 --> 00:16:59,359
Hey, you're not getting the last word.

414
00:16:59,361 --> 00:17:00,426
<i>I'm</i> getting the last word.

415
00:17:00,428 --> 00:17:01,527
- No, you're not.
- Yes, I am.

416
00:17:01,529 --> 00:17:02,562
No, you're not!

417
00:17:02,564 --> 00:17:03,630
Ah, she's too good.

418
00:17:03,632 --> 00:17:05,865
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Okay.

419
00:17:05,867 --> 00:17:07,467
Uh, look, we've learned
a lot about you both

420
00:17:07,469 --> 00:17:10,364
over the past few days,
and from where I'm standing,

421
00:17:10,389 --> 00:17:12,272
you're actually perfect for each other.

422
00:17:12,274 --> 00:17:14,176
Yeah, that's true. I mean,

423
00:17:14,201 --> 00:17:16,601
you only want one thing, and...

424
00:17:16,744 --> 00:17:19,206
he only is one thing.

425
00:17:20,645 --> 00:17:24,112
Yeah, and-and if that one
thing is the right thing,

426
00:17:24,137 --> 00:17:26,586
well, then you got to
hang on to that thing.

427
00:17:26,588 --> 00:17:28,021
You know? And this is coming

428
00:17:28,023 --> 00:17:29,689
from an old couple who's made it

429
00:17:29,691 --> 00:17:32,579
almost all the way through
their lives together.

430
00:17:32,995 --> 00:17:34,929
As you so thoughtfully pointed out.

431
00:17:34,954 --> 00:17:36,529
ADAM: But look, all we're saying is

432
00:17:36,531 --> 00:17:38,908
don't let go of his thing.

433
00:17:41,975 --> 00:17:43,069
He's right.

434
00:17:43,071 --> 00:17:45,124
Losing you was awful.

435
00:17:45,483 --> 00:17:48,107
Can we at least have
a drink and catch up?

436
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:52,202
Well, I guess it wouldn't
hurt to hear you out,

437
00:17:52,264 --> 00:17:54,280
- Mr. Tickles.
- (GIGGLES)

438
00:17:56,384 --> 00:17:58,985
Come on, I know a bar with
lots of pictures of me.

439
00:18:01,890 --> 00:18:03,356
Look at that.

440
00:18:04,187 --> 00:18:05,792
There's an ass for every saddle.

441
00:18:05,794 --> 00:18:08,371
(CHUCKLES): Yeah.

442
00:18:08,396 --> 00:18:10,496
I guess when you find your person,

443
00:18:10,498 --> 00:18:11,597
you work stuff out.

444
00:18:11,599 --> 00:18:12,665
Yeah.

445
00:18:13,723 --> 00:18:16,369
Your feet are the perfect temperature.

446
00:18:16,371 --> 00:18:18,071
Aw.

447
00:18:18,073 --> 00:18:21,641
I should've been nicer about
that caterpillar you saw.

448
00:18:22,844 --> 00:18:24,674
You saw a caterpillar?

449
00:18:25,330 --> 00:18:26,462
Yeah, yeah.

450
00:18:26,487 --> 00:18:28,648
- It looked like a mustache.
- Oh.

451
00:18:28,650 --> 00:18:32,418
Oh! That's great.

452
00:18:32,420 --> 00:18:34,253
That's great.

453
00:18:35,523 --> 00:18:37,423
Hey, have you heard anything from Lisa?

454
00:18:37,425 --> 00:18:39,892
Yeah. Leif moved back in with her.

455
00:18:40,099 --> 00:18:42,037
Turns out he was living
in a storage unit.

456
00:18:42,062 --> 00:18:43,451
- Oh.
- (CHUCKLES)

457
00:18:43,834 --> 00:18:46,828
And, as we predicted,
she's already dying

458
00:18:46,853 --> 00:18:48,534
to get out of the
house and back to work.

459
00:18:48,536 --> 00:18:51,571
Mm. So...

460
00:18:51,573 --> 00:18:54,207
it sounds like our days
on the couch together

461
00:18:54,209 --> 00:18:55,441
are almost over.

462
00:18:55,443 --> 00:18:56,609
Mm.

463
00:18:56,611 --> 00:18:57,944
Tell you what.

464
00:18:58,478 --> 00:19:00,713
Let's watch<i> Rush Hour 3.</i>

465
00:19:01,042 --> 00:19:02,709
Let's go with<i> Gilmore Girls.</i>

466
00:19:04,220 --> 00:19:05,385
I'm a little hooked.

467
00:19:05,387 --> 00:19:07,439
- Ah.
- Yeah.

468
00:19:07,464 --> 00:19:10,356
I mean, she's her mom, but
she's also her best friend.

469
00:19:10,358 --> 00:19:11,424
Yeah.

470
00:19:11,426 --> 00:19:14,454
- Come on.
- Aw. (GIGGLES)

471
00:19:14,665 --> 00:19:16,262
- (CHUCKLES)
- Look at us.

472
00:19:16,264 --> 00:19:17,548
It got good again.

473
00:19:17,573 --> 00:19:18,872
(BOTH CHUCKLE)

474
00:19:20,001 --> 00:19:21,626
They're hot, but it's...

475
00:19:21,651 --> 00:19:23,417
- it's a dry heat.
- Mm-hmm.

476
00:19:32,921 --> 00:19:33,875
It doesn't fit.

477
00:19:33,900 --> 00:19:36,134
- I told you to measure it.
- I did.

478
00:19:36,183 --> 00:19:37,816
But it's wider than the door.

479
00:19:37,818 --> 00:19:39,551
You didn't tell me to measure the door.

480
00:19:40,184 --> 00:19:41,768
Andi's gonna be home any minute.

481
00:19:41,793 --> 00:19:42,754
If she sees this,

482
00:19:42,779 --> 00:19:44,689
she'll think I'm accusing
her of not exercising.

483
00:19:44,691 --> 00:19:46,324
And we just got good again.

484
00:19:46,326 --> 00:19:47,494
(KEYS JINGLING)

485
00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:49,194
That's Andi. Oh, God,
she can't see this.

486
00:19:49,196 --> 00:19:51,029
Uh...

487
00:19:51,031 --> 00:19:52,928
Here, here, here.

488
00:19:59,043 --> 00:20:00,543
What are you doing?

489
00:20:01,105 --> 00:20:02,621
Camouflage.

490
00:20:03,785 --> 00:20:05,487
- Hey, guys.
- Hey.

491
00:20:05,512 --> 00:20:06,845
What's this?

492
00:20:06,996 --> 00:20:08,513
Dish towel.

493
00:20:09,814 --> 00:20:11,183
Okay, fine.

494
00:20:11,185 --> 00:20:12,784
I was gonna throw it away.

495
00:20:13,235 --> 00:20:15,569
Go ahead. You never use it anyway.

496
00:20:16,032 --> 00:20:18,054
What?<i> I</i> never use it?

497
00:20:18,548 --> 00:20:19,625
<i>Me?</i>

498
00:20:20,525 --> 00:20:22,677
I mean, I was gonna say
something, but... (SCOFFS)

499
00:20:22,702 --> 00:20:25,585
everyone knows you can't
talk to men about exercising.

500
00:20:26,749 --> 00:20:31,749
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