I've never looked at any of the tapes.
Honestly, I always meant to go through them
and see what was on there,
but I just haven't.
I'm afraid to watch them, because if I look
at these, and I see something that was a red flag --
Beat myself up, because why didn't I see
that was so obvious, you know?
As much as memories are nice, sometimes they hurt.
I remember this night.
He's sitting across the table from me, and I saw it
in the video just the, where he was happy and then face changed.
Everyone can see his demeanor change.
Everybody knew when it was fixing
to happen, when he was gonna turn.
That's a part of my life that
I don't even want to have anymore.
I think it would be good for me to throw these tapes away,
because I've been stuck in limbo in this for so long
that...
this might be something to help me push out.
His mistake was not keeping his secret to himself.
He's not who I thought he was when I married him.
Things changed with him so fast,
back and forth.
I'm sorry.
This wasn't supposed to happen.
[sniffles]
I don't know if I can do this.
[sniffles]
I feel, right now, like I did when I was living with him.
Can I stop?
PRODUCER: Absolutely.
All of a sudden,
I feel -- I feel like I'm back
in that house, I feel like I'm...
still stuck there.
I feel afraid, and he's in prison.
He's not getting out.
And I'm scared. And I don't know why.
I know I agreed to do this show,
and I probably shouldn't have.
[The Paper Chase's "What's So Amazing About Grace?" plays]
[strings continue playing sinister tune]
[static crackling]
[knock at door] [creaking]
[banging on door]
[creaking]
[water dripping]
[banging on door] [creaking]
[sinister chord strikes]
ROBYN: I grew up in New London, Connecticut.
I was in the Navy, I was a photographer's mate.
When I divorced my first husband,
my life was a mess, and it was
a decision for him to raise the children, and this was back
in 1985.
I needed a change.
I just wanted to move somewhere where there was
no snow.
I wanted a fresh start.
I moved to Georgia in 1994, and I met Craig in August of '98.
I was at a friend of mine's house.
We were partying that night, you know, drinking some beers
and singing karaoke and just being stupid.
And when I woke up the next morning, there was
this guy sitting on her couch, and I was like, ooh.
He's kind of good-looking.
Hi. I don't think I met you.
I'm Craig.
Hi, I'm Robyn.
ROBYN: When I looked at him, it was instant chemistry.
I just immediately thought, "That's the one."
I had the butterflies and the constant grin.
He had brought it up that, um,
"Oh, maybe we can go do something,
go to dinner sometime."
Since we didn't get to talk last night,
would you want to grab a bite?
Um, yeah.
ROBYN: I saw that he was interested, and I knew I was,
and then he was very nice, and we talked,
and he was goofy, he was funny.
You wouldn't believe that he was an angry person.
You wouldn't believe that he was an abusive person.
You wouldn't believe that this is
a person that could kill somebody.
He had us all fooled.
Almost every night, we all used to go after work.
We'd go to our friend's house, and we'd shoot darts,
drink beer, play cards.
His friends were like, "We never saw Craig like this.
"He just seems so happy.
You're the best thing for him."
I thought, this is it.
Yay! Finally, I got my life the way I want it to be.
But there was this one friend, and his name was Jack.
Hey, Jack.
Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?
Hey, what's up?
He's like, "You need to just calm down with him.
"You need to back off a little bit,
because he's not what you think."
And I was like, "Well, what do you mean?"
"He's bad news. Just -- just be careful."
What do you mean "bad news"?
My thought was...
bad news? What?
He cheated on his ex-girlfriend?
He drinks too much beer and falls asleep in the table?
Let's just say he has anger issues.
He's like, "You know, I know that everybody thinks that
you guys are great together, and maybe you are,"
he said, "But he is evil.
"He will hit you. He will scream at you.
He's just angry."
That was a warning to run.
But when Jack told me that, I honestly dismissed it.
I haven't seen that.
I thought that Jack was interested in me,
and that's why he wanted me to get away from Craig.
That's why I dismissed it.
I really thought that he had ulterior motives, you know?
I don't know what he was like before,
but he's not like that with me.
At that point, I did not see a bad part of Craig at all.
I did not see any indication whatsoever
that things would go the way that they did.
When we moved in together,
it wasn't long before I started
to see a different side of Craig.
I started seeing the little bit here
and there of the anger pop out.
Our first Christmas Eve,
a couple of months into the relationship,
he came home angry, for no reason that I know of.
I could tell he was drunk.
He was slurring his words and kind of wobbling around.
Oh, look who decided to show up.
I'm hungry. Fix me something.
He said, "Woman, get in that kitchen
and make me something to eat." I thought he was joking.
Are you kidding me?
I hadn't seen the mean part of him yet,
so I wasn't afraid to stand up to him.
So I confronted him about him acting like he is.
What is wrong with you kind of thing.
If you want something to eat, go make it yourself.
ROBYN: His face just changed.
He went from this to this.
That was scary.
I mean, it was just like this face and then this face.
And that's when he grabbed me by my wrists and...
tossed me into the wall.
I was in shock at first.
off of me!
I had never seen him like that before. Never.
I said to myself,
I'm not gonna be abused.
What the hell is wrong with you?!
Stop it. I'm sorry.
And of course the promises,
"Oh, I was just drunk, and I don't believe I did that."
I should have left. I should have ran out then.
Please --
Let's have a nice Christmas.
ROBYN: But I desperately wanted things to work,
because I thought I knew him.
I thought I knew that he was my soul mate,
and I thought that it was just one time.
It never happened before.
It actually didn't happen for a long time after that,
like years after that, it never happened again.
But in my soul, thinking, looking back,
I think Craig always had that in him, the evil, and almost
enjoyed making people hurt physically or emotionally.
And I think he learned how to hide that very well,
but then when that mask would slip, it would be this
uncaring, almost relish in hurting people.
Just liked it.
I've always been a worrier.
Always worried about gotta make sure the bills are paid,
gotta make sure that we have enough money.
One day, we were talking
about money, and I was a little worried.
Look, I don't think we can afford to go away next weekend.
Look at this credit card bill.
ROBYN: Craig said not to worry.
He's got a lot of money coming in
Relax -- in a couple months,
all our money problems are gonna be taken care of.
What do you mean?
And he said, "Years ago, me and my cousin Terry,
"we got life insurance policies on each other,
"and now that he's missing as soon as he is declared dead,
I come into all that money, so don't worry too much."
Wait, what?
What are you talking about?
ROBYN: I was asking him, "He disappeared? Really?"
He's like, "Yeah,
they found his car in the Okefenokee Swamp."
Wait, your -- your cousin is missing. What happened?
The car was running I guess all night
or all day, whatever, before they found it,
it was out of gas. The door was open.
He had specifics about this car, and that
kind of struck me as a little odd,
but then I thought, well, maybe it was all in the paper.
I never heard of Terry before.
I'm from Connecticut, and I moved down here
in '94, and this whole thing happened in '91.
So I'm confused.
Why would you get the insurance money?
I was asking him, I was like,
"Well, what do you mean insurance poli -- he's --
On your cousin?
We took out policies on each other, just in case.
Most people only have insurance policies for
their spouse.
You don't do it for your friend, your buddy,
your cousin,
but they were even closer than brothers,
is what he used to tell me.
Terry was his best friend, he was his brother.
They were never apart, always together from
the time that they were little until Terry disappeared.
Now that I think about it,
it is very strange that he waited for Terry to be declared
dead instead of waiting for
Terry to see if he'll come home.
Maybe he started over somewhere, or...
I thought Terry just ran away.
Some people do. I did.
I ran away from Connecticut.
I did it. You know, maybe he had to do the same thing.
- Fresh start. - I doubt it.
But I never, ever, ever,
ever heard Craig talk about his cousin
maybe being found alive. Ever.
Oh, my God.
- That's horrible. - Yeah.
He just told me that Terry was gone, and they never found him.
Matter of fact, he said they never
found his body -- Now that I think about it,
that's pretty weird, too.
But you know, it could wind up being something good for us.
Why would Craig say they never found his body
if he didn't know Terry was dead?
This was our wedding day.
It was a very happy day.
We got married May 13th, 2000.
That was my fairytale.
Everything was just perfect.
This was the beginning of what I thought was gonna be
the perfect life that I always wanted,
that, you know, someone who always would care
about me, and we would protect each other, and...
[sighs]
It's almost sad to look at this,
because the fairy tale ended
when I realized that...
just wasn't the man I thought he was.
♪
Craig would bring up his
cousin Terry's disappearance now and then.
And Craig had this habit that he would get you to believe
the stupidest things,
the silliest things -- He would get
you worked up and to believe something, and you believe
in it, you believe in it, and then he'd go,
"Just kidding."
[laughs mockingly] "You're so stupid.
I can't believe you believed that."
And one night,
we were watching this movie about these army guys
training in the bayou,
and he had said, "That's where Terry's at."
There. What do you know? Just like Terry.
I'm like, "What? What do you mean Terry's in the swamp?"
"Yeah, I put them in there."
Get out of here. He's like, "No, I'm serious.
I put him in the swamp."
"When did you put him in the swamp?"
He said, "Right after I killed him."
And you're thinking...
yeah, okay.
Oh, please.
That's where I dumped him,
in the swamp, just like that.
And I was just like, "You're kidding, right?"
He's like, "Nope, dead serious.
"I killed him and put him in
the swamp because he was sleeping with my wife."
You're telling me you killed your cousin.
Yep.
Just like that.
ROBYN: And I just believed that that was just one
of his silly jokes.
I was waiting for the punch line.
Then I let it go, because he's just saying it to
get my reaction just to see if I would go [gasps].
Shut up.
I'm not falling for that.
ROBYN: I didn't believe it.
The story would change just a little bit from,
"I put him in the swamp," to
"I cut him up and put him in the swamp," to
"I put him in trash bags."
And about four or five years into our marriage,
he started using Terry's disappearance
as a threat to me.
I remember clear one night that he was out partying.
I didn't feel like going. I just wanted to stay home.
He just came in, and he started spurting at me all
the horrible all things I am and all the awful things
I've ever done.
You've been sitting here all night, you lazy cow?
Just giving me this barrage of hate.
Just awful things, that I'm ugly
and disgusting and stupid and I never do anything
he says and I'm worthless,
and there ain't nothing good about me.
I just sat there, in shock.
I didn't know what to say.
And then he just started telling me that he was
gonna put me in the swamp like Terry.
He was gonna make me gator bait.
"I'll kill you, and just like I did Terry,
"I'll just kill you, chop you up,
"and put you in the swamp and won't nobody ever
find your body."
♪
He told me that he got away with murder for 20 years.
Not a problem. He's done it before.
He'll do it again.
The look in Craig's eye was pure hatred.
It was very scary, and it made me
believe every word he was saying -- there was no doubt.
That was the truth. He was telling me the truth.
And if it was true, and if he did it once, then what?
If it was that easy for him to do
to his cousin that he loved so much,
it might be easy to do to anybody.
Oh, my God, I was scared to death.
I wanted to get out of the whole situation,
but no money.
Where was I gonna go?
Family's in Connecticut and really
not a very close family, so I couldn't go back there.
If I were to leave him, he would find me.
If I were to ever call the police
because of the way he treated me,
he would get out of jail and kill me.
Okay. So just live with it,
deal with it, and hope for the best that it's not true.
♪
Ugh.
♪
That is the person
behind the mask.
I can't look at that, because that's a person
I saw every day.
I'm scared of him.
Now, even.
Please don't make me look at that again.
♪
The sudden fear when I saw that face.
It never -- It hasn't gone away yet.
That put me right back into that house,
scared, afraid. [sobs]
♪
That's the person I saw all the time.
And that's the person I see in my head when I remember.
God, I did not expect that reaction.
Out of me right there -- It got me shakin'.
Holy [bleep].
I'm flabbergasted at my reaction to that picture.
I thought I was way over that.
He asked me one day if I would go shopping
and buy one of those, you know,
those big picture frames that you put different
pictures in, in one frame.
I thought he was gonna put family pictures, maybe --
Maybe my family and his family all combined in one frame.
I thought that was pretty nice, you know, so I did.
I brought home this big, huge frame,
and he started putting in the newspaper clippings of Terry,
about how Terry's car was found,
how they suspected Craig,
pictures of Terry's face and stuff
in this collage, and I'm like, that's morbid.
When I read that he was the suspect, that they suspected
that he was the only one that could have did it,
I asked him about that,
I was like, "They knew that it was you?"
And he was like, "Yeah, but they couldn't prove it,
because there's no body."
I believe he was proud of that collage.
And he'd hang it on the wall in the living room.
I'd take it down, and he'd put it up.
I'd take it down, he'd put it up.
It was a game for him.
"Look what I did and got away with it."
I knew the truth, but what was I supposed to do?
Could I run to the police and say -- well,
they couldn't prove it for 20 years.
What am I gonna do?
If I did not do exactly what he wanted,
I was gator bait, he would tell me.
"I will do to you what I did to Terry.
You are gator bait."
So just shut up, deal with it, and go on tomorrow
like nothing happened.
But I did feel like I knew too much.
Sometimes I felt like he believed I knew too much,
and I never doubted that he was gonna kill me.
It was just a matter of how and when.
As time progressed, my imagination just got bigger
and bigger as I believed the story more and more.
Once we moved into the other place, we were in the bedroom
unpacking stuff in our new place,
putting things in the closet.
What's this? I haven't seen this before.
Craig had this metal box.
It was like -- Just like a little
army green -- metal army box -- It was locked.
Sounds kind of heavy.
I was like shaking it. I said, "What's in this?"
He said, "That's mine.
It's my private things. You just leave it alone."
ROBYN: I'm nosy. I'm very nosy. I want to know.
What's that? What's that?
Where's that? I'm like a little child --
What's this? What's that? And I was like, "Really,
"I want to know what's in it. Open it up.
I want to see what's in it."
I started asking questions about that box.
That's when everything changed.
I seriously can't know what's in here?
I said it's none of your business!
He grabbed it out of my hands.
"Don't you ever touch that box again.
That is my private property. You don't touch it."
I almost felt like he was gonna
take it and hit me with it, honestly.
And it scared me.
And he told me, "Don't you ever touch this again.
You know what will happen to you."
And I knew what he was referring to.
He was referring to putting me in the swamp.
Unless you want to go see Terry,
because that can be arranged.
ROBYN: At first I thought there was maybe just, like, Playboy
magazines in that box he didn't want me to see.
But the box itself was heavy.
So there's gotta be something in that box that he's hiding
that, if anybody else found it,
they would know beyond a shadow of a doubt
that he was involved with Terry's disappearance.
I was so curious.
I wanted to know what was in it,
but I was too afraid to look.
Even if he wasn't home and didn't know that I got into it,
I still didn't do it, because I knew that maybe he set it
a certain way that if I moved it,
he would see.
I was too afraid and I never --
Never did know what was in that box.
I gave Craig a gun cabinet for his birthday one year
that had keys, it was one of those glass fronts on the top,
and then on the bottom it was like a locked
little compartment.
And he took those keys and never
allowed me to into that gun cabinet.
I didn't think too much of it until
our marriage started getting worse and worse and worse.
And I started getting more afraid of what was
gonna happen.
And it kind of made me determined that I wanted
to know what he's hiding in that gun cabinet.
Well, I was home alone a lot, too, when he was at work,
so I found a way in.
I unscrew the hinges.
Took the door off.
There was a little black gun in there
that I don't know where that came from.
I'd never seen this gun before.
And so that kind of made me a little nervous.
It scared me, because I thought, what is he
doing with this gun that I don't know about?
And it was a little gun -- It was only, like, this big.
Behind the glass, there was two guns.
There was a .22 rifle and a shotgun.
You could see those guns.
There was no reason to hide those guns.
Why was he hiding this gun?
It was hidden from me for a reason.
And I thought that that was the gun that he was
gonna kill me with, because it was small enough to hide,
easy to get rid of, I imagine.
[car door shuts]
Damn it.
ROBYN: I had to be meticulous
and put each hinge right back where it was.
I just made sure everything was perfect.
If Craig saw me in that gun cabinet, I would have been dead.
I know he wanted me dead.
I know that for a fact.
I have no doubt -- He told me many times.
I can't say that there was physically
no way for me to leave him,
but he had broken me down.
I was so broken that I didn't care anymore.
One night, he went out, he came home in a rage.
I was watching the TV.
He walked in front of me, went down under that gun cabinet,
took the gun out.
Didn't say a word. Didn't even look at me.
I expected him to just turn around and shoot me,
but he didn't even look at me.
He didn't even acknowledge my existence.
Went out the front door,
shot it in the air, like, three or four times.
[three gunshots blast]
[breathing heavily]
Walked back in, put the gun back in the gun cabinet,
and left.
It scared me.
I was just sitting in the -- On the couch, looking at
the TV, hoping that maybe if I ignored it, it would go away.
I honestly think that that night either he was going to
shoot me and lost his nerve and decided to go do that,
you know, shoot it in the air,
or maybe it was just to let me know that it's coming.
When he left, I went out there, and I looked on the ground,
and I saw the casings there where he had shot,
and I picked them all up.
I gave a couple to a friend,
and I said, "If anything happens to me,
this is the gun they came out of."
I just figured if somebody had these casings,
at least somebody will know what happened to me.
I won't be like Terry.
They won't have to wonder if Craig did it.
That way, he won't get away with at least this murder.
ROBYN: I knew he was gonna kill me.
The way he looked at me that last time, he was going to
kill me -- it was gonna happen very soon.
One night, when he was especially crazy,
I was laying in the bed,
I heard Craig come in drunk, and I just pretended I was asleep.
♪
And I heard him in the gun cabinet.
When I heard him go in the living room
in the gun cabinet, I sat up, and I just watched him.
He had his .22 in his hand, and he was walking around the house,
unscrewing the light bulbs,
all the way out, not anger, smashing them.
Just -- he would just take them out,
put 'em on the ground or on the table, wherever he was,
and just go on to the next.
I watched him do it in the kitchen, down the hallway,
watched him go into the living room.
The lights went off -- I watched him go
into the bathroom, and the light went off.
He was very methodical. This was planned.
I could hear my heartbeat.
I could feel my heartbeat in my ears.
Just dunh dunh, and then it got faster.
And I thought, what am I gonna do?
How am I gonna get out of this?
And weird thing is right about then,
Tina, my daughter, called me. - [phone ringing]
My first thought was, "I have to shut this phone up.
"I have to shut this phone up.
"If I do not shut this phone up,
he's coming this way."
Tina.
She said, "I just had a weird feeling
I needed to call you."
I said, "He's gonna kill me.
"He's gonna kill me tonight.
He's unscrewing light bulbs, he's got a gun, I'm gonna die."
What do I do?
And she said, "Hang up the phone and get out of that house."
As soon as I got off the phone with her,
and I just looked around, and I didn't see him.
He went out the front door, and he went to
cut the phone line.
When he went out the front door,
I ran out the back door and around and down
the street and waited for Tina to come pick me up.
Tina was having marital problems.
So she moved down here, because she had nowhere else to go.
And I got in her car, and we went to her house.
She saved me, because I was gonna die that night.
I have no doubt. She had no doubt.
We both knew.
I was scared to death to go back to that house,
and I knew I needed to get a restraining order on him.
When we went into the hearing, Craig had to be there,
and the judge said, "Why are you afraid of him?
Why are you so scared he's gonna kill you?"
And I said, "Because he killed his cousin.
He's killed before.
The judge says, "Well, how do you know that?"
"Because he told me -- he told me he killed his cousin."
How about it Mr. Thrift? You a murderer?
♪
This is not exaggeration. Craig said...
"Did you find a body yet?" Just like that.
Just arrogant, like, hm, can't touch me.
That is not the actions of an innocent person.
And still the judge didn't believe me.
I don't see any prior police reports nor
do I see evidence of a threat here.
He said, "Well, I've thought about it,
"and I don't believe a word you say.
"So we're going to err on the side
"of caution and give you the restraining order,
but you have two weeks to get out of that house."
Two weeks.
Craig took it that the judge was on his side and he could be
just showing me, like, look at this, girl,
I can say this to this judge in a public courtroom,
and they still don't believe you.
That Friday night, when I got the restraining order,
I had talked to Tina on the phone, and she said, "Good,
"I'm glad you got the restraining order.
I'll be over in a little while."
Well, she never came.
And I thought, oh, she must have got sidetracked or whatever.
And then the next day I had gotten
a phone call from one of Tina's other friends.
[phone ringing]
Hello?
And he said, "You better go down to Tina's
"boyfriend's house, because there's police
everywhere, and something's going on."
I'll be right there.
I went down there, and I saw the police.
And I thought, what the heck?
There's police tape everywhere.
And I walked up, and the woman said, "Are you Robyn?"
I said yes.
Said, "Are you Tina's mother?"
I said yes.
She said, "Well, she's deceased."
I was like, "Well just let me in there.
"I can -- I can -- I can fi-- I can help her.
Just let me go in there."
I know it sounds crazy.
But when you're in that minute,
your brain doesn't want to accept it.
I heard the word, but my brain didn't accept it.
So I thought, I'll just fix it.
I'll just go fix it. I can help her.
Let me -- let me go take care of her.
♪
The only thing she said was, "It's a crime scene.
You can't go in there."
And I thought crime scene?
Then it hit me.
I never saw her. They never let me see her.
They immediately took her directly to Atlanta for autopsy.
Tina died of a massive drug overdose.
When I did realize that it was drug overdose,
I knew physically, Craig wasn't involved as far as I didn't
picture him standing over her, killing her.
But she died of the same drugs that he did.
And I do know that
she got the drugs from him.
The timing was ridiculous.
Restraining order. She's dead.
That doesn't just happen out of nowhere.
Friday, the restraining order.
Saturday, we found Tina.
The next Sunday, I had gone right to church.
His father was a deacon in the -- in that church,
and I went and talked to his dad
and his wife and told them what
happened with Tina.
I don't know if you heard -- Tina overdosed.
Does Craig know this?
No, I haven't told him.
ROBYN: And his dad had called right there,
right while I was standing there,
he called Craig and said, "I just
"want you to know that Robin's daughter,
Tina, died last night."
And he said, "Good. Bitch deserved it."
I could hear it over the phone.
That was his exact words.
What kind of human being is that cold, to say that?
Why don't you take a few moments?
Thank you.
ROBYN: Sometimes, when I think about that conversation...
sometimes, my brain goes to --
That he said "She deserves it."
Or "She deserved it."
If he said deserves with an "s,"
he meant that I deserve it.
I deserve to have my daughter dead.
If he said deserved with a "d,"
Then he meant that Tina deserved to be dead.
There is a big part of me that believes that Craig
gave Tina something that he knew
that she couldn't come back from.
For what reason, I can only speculate.
He could have wanted her to go away because she knew too much.
I'm not gonna sit here and say
Craig did this on purpose, and he killed my daughter.
Because I don't know. But my brain goes there.
I will never forgive myself for this situation.
Never.
The first realization that he was watching me --
I started seeing Craig drive slowly past my house
back and forth every now and then,
and I was afraid of what he had planned.
I was afraid to go out and check my mail.
I was afraid to go to work.
I was afraid to go home.
I was afraid to not be home.
I was afraid to go to the store,
because I didn't know if he was behind me,
if he was ahead of me, if he's over there
behind that bush -- He's capable of anything.
I had my friend come stay with me at that point.
She would watch, and I would watch,
and I would sleep, and she would sleep.
I took pictures of him driving by
in his truck with that little black gun.
Went directly to the judge.
The first thing the judge says, "Well, you can't
prove that that's his truck or him in the truck."
"What do you mean? I have a picture that's showing you
right here!"
"But you can't prove it."
I don't know what else to do.
What else can I do?
There was no peace for me, and I didn't --
I didn't know what to do about it.
Look what he got away with before for 20 damn years.
I didn't know how to defend myself.
I don't know how to fight.
So all I could do is hope that someone would come and help me.
Not even a year later,
maybe about four or five months,
I was contacted by the detective from Ware County.
♪
That's when they started questioning me about what
I knew about what Craig had done with Terry.
I don't understand -- what's changed after all this time?
I asked, I said, "What would make you come now, talk to me?"
She said, "Well we are under the understanding that
in open court, you accused him of killing Terry."
My stomach dropped right there.
At the time when I said that Craig had killed his cousin,
the judge asked me a question.
I gave him the honest answer.
I didn't think that it was going any further, and someone
had told someone who told someone,
and it got back to the detectives in Ware County.
- You're saying he did this? - Yes.
ROBYN: They asked me if Craig said
anything to me ever about admitting it.
Um, if I did, what he said, how he said it.
They asked me all kinds of stuff.
He always says that he's gonna put me
in the swamp just like Terry.
ROBYN: I told the truth, and that's all I could do.
It was time for all this to stop.
It was time for Terry's family to stop wondering.
I didn't know that so many people were testifying.
I thought I was basically the only one.
But all the people in our group were contacted
by law enforcement, and they all
started testifying, and I could not believe everyone had
the exact same story of what he said to us about how, where,
when with Terry's murder.
He would talk about this, say this to everyone.
His mistake was not keeping his secret to himself.
Now it's 10 years since then.
To this day,
I feel, if he ever gets out of prison, he's coming.
I go online every now and then look up
the offender search
just to make sure he's still in there, because
I do worry that he will get paroled one day.
He was actually eligible for parole in May of 2019.
And I don't know how far he will go to try to find me,
because all he's got right now is time to be angry, and when he
only had a little bit of time to be angry,
it was bad enough.
But now here's years of him being angry.
If he ever gets out, I'm dead.
♪
I have guns in my house.
I know exactly where they are.
I know exactly how to use them, and I am ready,
just in case.
When I think of everything I went through,
I would never have believed that I married someone like that.
The truth set me free from that situation.
But it's hard to live now with that knowing.
Telling this story made me realize that I have
been blaming myself for a whole lot of things
that weren't my fault,
and there's a little bit of more work to do
to try to forgive myself for certain things,
but I think this is, like, a real --
This is a real good thing for me.
This is gonna allow me to have a life
and get out of all this.
Thanks.
[exhales heavily] I'm sorry.