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♪ ♪
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- Synced & Corrected by Dragoniod -
www.addic7ed.com
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Hello, my fellow Americans.
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- Hey.
- Fawz, you're back from Iraq.
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I thought you were supposed
to be back a week ago.
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Well, that was the plan,
but as you might have heard,
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they've made it a little bit harder
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for people like me to
get back into the country.
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You're the one who voted for him.
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I'm not complaining.
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I just spent a glorious
weekend in the Baghdad airport
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living off of Cinnabons and
duty-free peppermint schnapps.
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Well, I'm glad you're back. (GROANS)
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Did you, uh, bring me a souvenir?
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Snow globe? T-shirt?
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Some of those delicious
Kurds I keep hearing about?
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First of all, Kurds are people.
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And, no, I got you something better.
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- Try it on.
- Oh.
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Thanks, buddy.
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What are those?
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- Oh, I'm taking the SATs next weekend.
- RANDY: Yup.
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Franco's been working really
hard at applying to college.
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And not getting me that donut
I ordered five minutes ago.
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Oh, my bad, Randy.
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You know, I might be
too old for college,
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but the good news is
that I hit that sweet spot
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where I get to hit on
faculty and students.
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Oh, yes, a young black man
who works at a donut shop
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and spends thousands of
dollars on an art degree.
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Sounds like a sad documentary.
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You know, I'm starting to
warm up to that travel ban.
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Guess who's got two arthritic thumbs
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and just bought a boat? This guy.
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Ow.
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RANDY: Wow.
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All these years of talking about a boat,
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- and you finally got one.
- Yeah.
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- Never thought I'd see the day.
- Well,
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place has been doing very well
ever since I hired Franco here.
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Yeah, so instead of
putting those profits
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- into getting me a raise...
- I bought a boat!
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Hey, come on. You're the
one that's always telling me
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to get out and enjoy my golden years.
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You're right, yeah. I think it's dope.
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Oh, I bought it at a police auction,
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and it was filled with dope.
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Oh, man, I would have bought
that dope and left the boat.
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Okay, here I come.
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I love it.
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I think I'll go stand outside,
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see what the breeze has in store for me.
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Ugh.
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That poor breeze.
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So, is that what men wear in Iraq?
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Actually, I forgot to get him something,
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so I picked that up
at the airport Chico's.
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My wife got one for herself.
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Tush wears it better.
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♪ ♪
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Damn! These SAT
questions weren't designed
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for dudes who grew up in the hood.
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Yeah, look at this math problem
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about the fastest
schooner in the regatta.
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What's a schooner?
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What the hell's a regatta?
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It's a yacht race.
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Then call it a damn yacht race!
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Man, Chicago public schools...
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they ain't prep us for this, man.
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Our science books were so old,
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we had a table of elements.
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That's what I'm talking about, man.
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You know Chance The Rapper
donated one million dollars
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to the Chicago school system?
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You know things are messed up
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when the rappers have
to save the schools.
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Yeah.
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You know, Franco, they
do have SAT prep courses.
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Yeah, but those things
are crazy expensive, Randy,
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and it ain't like I got boat money.
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Well, I could text you the name of one
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that's pretty reasonable.
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My daughter took it.
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And she got into Northwestern.
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And now she's gonna be a pediatrician
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helping premature babies.
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I think she was inspired
by watching me with her dad.
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Thanks, Randy, I'll check it out.
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You know, Franco, if that doesn't work,
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you can always sleep with the dean.
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That's how I got into
the welding academy.
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Let's just say I got a full ride
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and so did she.
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You know, it's gonna cost me $2,200
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to dock my boat in Burnham Harbor.
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Maybe your Mr. The Rapper can
give me the money for that.
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Hey, kid, we got a customer.
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See if you can sell her
$2,200 worth of donuts.
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Hi.
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Um, uh, good morning.
Uh, what can I get you?
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Uh, what are you known for?
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Well, people do say I have an
exquisite set of cheekbones.
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Mm.
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I bet they do.
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But I-I was talking about the donuts.
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Oh, right, right, 'cause
we're in a donut shop, right.
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(LAUGHS) Okay.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well,
I know just the one.
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♪ Our maple cream for the lady. ♪
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You know, he's busy. I'll get it.
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Ooh, this place has such a great vibe.
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It's like IHOP meets Studio 54.
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Then they end up sleeping together
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and having a little
Superior Donuts baby.
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- Yeah, we get that all the time.
- Really?
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Course not. That's crazy as hell. Here.
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So, how long have you been in business?
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Arthur's owned this shop since 1870.
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That would be 1970.
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You're a neighborhood institution.
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What's your secret?
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Well, for starters, I make the
best damn donuts in Chicago.
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Damn right.
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Plus we have the perfect location.
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We get the commuters from the “L,”
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and we get the Cubs fans from Wrigley,
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and the stoners from
the weed dispensary.
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Don't forget the quitters
from Weight Watchers.
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That's genius.
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Okay, well, thanks for the donut.
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Um, I'm Sofia, by the way.
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- I'm Franco.
- Okay.
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Oh, I just moved into the neighborhood,
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so, I-I'm sure I'll see you around.
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Okay.
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You got the door?
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She already had it.
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- Looks like someone made a new friend.
- Yeah.
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Hey, I pay you to work, not to flirt.
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I can multitask.
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You saw her, she was nice.
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And it's hard to resist all this.
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Yeah.
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All 98 pounds of you.
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What the hell is that?
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Well, I'm no expert,
but it appears to be
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a food truck.
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“Home of the organic breakfast bowl.”
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Ah! Food truck!
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He's parking right in front of our shop.
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He can't do that.
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I agree, Arthur.
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It's presumptuous,
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egregious, audacious.
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Just say it's wack, man.
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Hey, hey. There's no way
you can park here, pal.
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Yeah.
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It was a tight squeeze,
but I made it, buddy.
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No, no, no, no.
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I-I-I-I think what he means
is you shouldn't park here.
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You know, like, right
in front of the shop.
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But you just said this
was the perfect location.
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It's called small talk, not
use-against-me-later talk.
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Hey, look, you're
selling breakfast food.
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That's my business.
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No, actually, I think we
have very different clientele.
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I cater to people who want
socially conscious food choices,
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and you cater to people
with emotional issues
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- and a high risk of stroke.
- Ooh.
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This is Uptown.
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Nobody's really interested in
your fancy edahamama and icacai.
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All right?
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Is he having a stroke?
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It's hard to tell sometimes.
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Hey, hey, listen, are you
gonna move this truck or not?
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Look, I've poured my entire
life savings into this truck
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and I really need to make it work.
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Yeah, well, I've been paying a mortgage
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and taxes here for 47 years.
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You just can't park here for
free and steal all my customers.
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Oh, my God, you're right. I...
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Now I can.
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- Wait a minute.
- No.
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That-that-that was a dime.
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I saw that. That was a dime.
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♪ ♪
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ARTHUR: Unbelievable.
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Her line is down the block.
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Hey, she just stole two of my stoners.
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That's Sheila and Ziggy.
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I once saw them smoking the same joint,
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Lady and The Tramp style.
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Who is she taking next, huh?
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My cops, my bikers, my
construction workers?
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Are you sure you're not
thinking of the Village People?
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Relax.
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Food trucks are just a fad.
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No, food trucks means
Uptown has arrived, baby.
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Soon, this will be a paradise
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of yoga studios and beard barbers.
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The streets will be paved with
gold, not syringes and poop.
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Where the hell is Franco?
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I need him to have one of those ideas
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that I hate at first,
but ends up working out.
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You told him he could
check out that SAT class
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00:07:51,416 --> 00:07:52,678
that Randy told him about.
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I know, but he was supposed
to be here 30 minutes ago.
209
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Ugh. This is brutal.
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Ever since James transferred,
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I'm doing the job of
one and a half cops.
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Randy, thank God you're here.
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Look, I need you to get
rid of that food truck.
214
00:08:04,763 --> 00:08:06,392
Now?
215
00:08:06,398 --> 00:08:09,862
Oh, look, I just chased down
a fat, drunk guy with no pants.
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00:08:09,868 --> 00:08:12,297
I mean, really,
217
00:08:12,303 --> 00:08:15,401
why do fat, drunk guys never have pants?
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Do they eat them?
219
00:08:21,312 --> 00:08:23,242
Randy, Randy, Randy, you
got to help me out here.
220
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(STAMMERS) Look, just
write her a ticket.
221
00:08:25,183 --> 00:08:28,080
Look, I'm not gonna deal
with some stupid food truck.
222
00:08:28,086 --> 00:08:31,683
This is Chicago, murder
capital of the world.
223
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Call me when there's a
head in her deep fryer.
224
00:08:35,326 --> 00:08:38,257
- Please! She's hammering me out there.
- Ugh.
225
00:08:38,263 --> 00:08:39,291
All right. Okay, okay.
226
00:08:39,297 --> 00:08:40,392
I'll go see what I can do.
227
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Thanks.
228
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Ah! I better go with her.
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She's not used to
working without a partner.
230
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God forbid she gets in a
tussle with that food truck lady
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00:08:48,473 --> 00:08:50,039
and I'm not there to film it.
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All right, Randy.
233
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I got your back.
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Sunglasses? Really?
235
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Classic intimidation tactic.
236
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They have rhinestones on the sides.
237
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They're my mom's.
238
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Oh, hello, Officer.
239
00:09:12,464 --> 00:09:15,360
Care for a nice, warm,
kale burrito on the house?
240
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Uh, Chicago PD doesn't take bribes.
241
00:09:18,069 --> 00:09:20,933
(LAUGHING)
242
00:09:20,939 --> 00:09:24,069
Look, you can't be here.
243
00:09:24,075 --> 00:09:26,638
You can't be here.
244
00:09:26,644 --> 00:09:28,774
- Why not?
- Because this street is,
245
00:09:28,780 --> 00:09:32,744
uh, not permitted for
vehicles over five tons.
246
00:09:32,750 --> 00:09:35,581
Oh, well, lucky for
me, I top out at 4.8.
247
00:09:35,587 --> 00:09:37,049
Okay.
248
00:09:37,055 --> 00:09:38,517
Well, then I'm gonna need to see
249
00:09:38,523 --> 00:09:40,519
your, uh, fire safety permit.
250
00:09:40,525 --> 00:09:42,955
Busted, baby.
251
00:09:42,961 --> 00:09:44,823
(SUNGLASSES SHATTER)
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00:09:44,829 --> 00:09:47,059
Okay, here you go.
253
00:09:47,065 --> 00:09:50,429
It's my ventilation certificate
and my food storage license.
254
00:09:50,435 --> 00:09:53,732
Hey, if you're dying to write a ticket,
255
00:09:53,738 --> 00:09:57,169
I do see a violation of Code 10-28
256
00:09:57,175 --> 00:09:58,641
(QUIETLY): right there.
257
00:10:01,813 --> 00:10:04,042
What the hell is a 10-28?
258
00:10:04,048 --> 00:10:06,245
Something about your sign being too low.
259
00:10:06,251 --> 00:10:08,647
- That woman really knows her stuff.
- (SNORTS)
260
00:10:08,653 --> 00:10:10,349
I can't believe you're
writing me a ticket.
261
00:10:10,355 --> 00:10:12,684
I'm drawing you a picture of a kitten.
262
00:10:12,690 --> 00:10:15,487
Take it and look mad. Oh. Yeah.
263
00:10:15,493 --> 00:10:17,823
(SNARLS)
264
00:10:17,829 --> 00:10:20,759
- Hey.
- What up?
265
00:10:20,765 --> 00:10:22,427
Where the hell you been?
You're 45 minutes late.
266
00:10:22,433 --> 00:10:24,663
Man, that SAT prep class was messed up.
267
00:10:24,669 --> 00:10:25,998
Them kids have been prepping for months.
268
00:10:26,004 --> 00:10:28,311
They got tutors and coaches and mentors.
269
00:10:28,318 --> 00:10:29,268
Yeah, right.
270
00:10:29,274 --> 00:10:30,836
Only mentor I had growing
up was my neighbor, Ricky,
271
00:10:30,842 --> 00:10:33,338
who taught me how to roll a blunt.
272
00:10:33,344 --> 00:10:34,606
Fr-Fr... I need you to focus.
273
00:10:34,612 --> 00:10:35,674
- I need you to fo...
- And that's another thing, man.
274
00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:37,409
Them kids all hopped up on drugs.
275
00:10:37,415 --> 00:10:38,610
But the kind that
makes you study harder,
276
00:10:38,616 --> 00:10:40,612
not the kind that makes music better.
277
00:10:40,618 --> 00:10:42,581
- Franco.
- What?
278
00:10:42,587 --> 00:10:44,082
I need you to get rid
of that food truck.
279
00:10:44,088 --> 00:10:45,817
- What do you want me to do about it?
- Talk to her.
280
00:10:45,823 --> 00:10:48,453
Use some of that charm you
think you have. Come on.
281
00:10:48,459 --> 00:10:50,656
Throw out some of those
millennial words of yours,
282
00:10:50,662 --> 00:10:53,663
you know, like, uh, “fo' shizzle.”
283
00:10:56,100 --> 00:10:58,530
First of all, I've never
said that a day in my life.
284
00:10:58,536 --> 00:11:00,198
- Okay.
- All right? But don't worry about it.
285
00:11:00,204 --> 00:11:01,366
I got you.
286
00:11:01,372 --> 00:11:02,568
Yeah.
287
00:11:02,574 --> 00:11:04,540
Hey, yo, Sofia... hi.
288
00:11:06,344 --> 00:11:09,041
Yo, I want to apologize for
my cranky old friend in there.
289
00:11:09,047 --> 00:11:10,742
But we all got one, right?
290
00:11:10,748 --> 00:11:12,711
No. My friends are all pretty much
291
00:11:12,717 --> 00:11:14,880
within 40 years of my own age.
292
00:11:14,886 --> 00:11:16,448
Um...
293
00:11:16,454 --> 00:11:20,118
Look, he's just worried you're
gonna drive him out of business.
294
00:11:20,124 --> 00:11:21,853
You know? So, it'd be cool if
you can just take your truck
295
00:11:21,859 --> 00:11:24,756
and park it somewhere else.
296
00:11:24,762 --> 00:11:27,459
I have a permit. I have
every right to be here.
297
00:11:27,465 --> 00:11:29,665
Fo' shizzle.
298
00:11:32,103 --> 00:11:33,432
I'm-a be real with you.
299
00:11:33,438 --> 00:11:35,534
He's been here his
whole life, all right?
300
00:11:35,540 --> 00:11:37,069
All he knows is donuts. All right?
301
00:11:37,075 --> 00:11:39,071
So he's just worried
you're gonna push him out.
302
00:11:39,077 --> 00:11:41,873
Yeah, but does he have to
be so belligerent about it?
303
00:11:41,879 --> 00:11:44,443
That's an SAT word. I know that one.
304
00:11:44,449 --> 00:11:47,312
Oh, are you going to college?
305
00:11:47,318 --> 00:11:48,614
Trying.
306
00:11:48,620 --> 00:11:49,848
I just don't know how
I'm supposed to compete
307
00:11:49,854 --> 00:11:51,249
with these kids and their fancy-ass
308
00:11:51,255 --> 00:11:53,151
guidance counselors, you know?
309
00:11:53,157 --> 00:11:57,022
At my school, we had a chalk
outline of a guidance counselor.
310
00:11:57,028 --> 00:11:59,491
She was murdered.
311
00:11:59,497 --> 00:12:02,694
We had nobody to talk to about it.
312
00:12:02,700 --> 00:12:03,996
What about your family?
Are they helping?
313
00:12:04,002 --> 00:12:05,263
Are you serious?
314
00:12:05,269 --> 00:12:06,498
You know, my dad once told me,
315
00:12:06,504 --> 00:12:07,799
(LOW VOICE): “Hey, Franco, you know,
316
00:12:07,805 --> 00:12:10,736
college is a waste of good
lottery ticket money.”
317
00:12:10,742 --> 00:12:12,571
I know. My parents never
went to college, either.
318
00:12:12,577 --> 00:12:15,307
They came from Colombia and
opened a diner in Wisconsin.
319
00:12:15,313 --> 00:12:17,209
And if they had it their
way, I'd be scrubbing counters
320
00:12:17,215 --> 00:12:18,543
till the day I die.
321
00:12:18,549 --> 00:12:21,884
Oh, well, you sure showed them.
322
00:12:22,754 --> 00:12:25,017
But I went anyway.
323
00:12:25,023 --> 00:12:26,385
And now, I'm running my own business,
324
00:12:26,391 --> 00:12:28,820
and I'm living my
dream, and you can, too.
325
00:12:28,826 --> 00:12:29,955
You know, I'll help you out.
326
00:12:29,961 --> 00:12:32,491
You just have to know
how to work the system.
327
00:12:32,497 --> 00:12:33,859
- Man, you right!
- Yeah.
328
00:12:33,865 --> 00:12:35,293
You are right, man.
329
00:12:35,299 --> 00:12:37,029
Hey, that system's going down.
330
00:12:37,035 --> 00:12:38,630
- Boom.
- (CHUCKLES) Yeah.
331
00:12:38,636 --> 00:12:40,298
So-so how do I do that?
332
00:12:40,304 --> 00:12:42,267
With the system?
333
00:12:42,273 --> 00:12:43,869
Well, first, your SAT score's
334
00:12:43,875 --> 00:12:45,637
only one part of the big picture.
335
00:12:45,643 --> 00:12:47,606
Have you done any internships?
336
00:12:47,612 --> 00:12:49,675
Oh, I, you know, I can't exactly afford
337
00:12:49,681 --> 00:12:51,576
to work for free at the moment.
338
00:12:51,582 --> 00:12:53,779
Or ever.
339
00:12:53,785 --> 00:12:55,914
How about community service?
340
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:58,483
Does court-mandated count?
341
00:12:58,489 --> 00:12:59,651
Letter of reference.
342
00:12:59,657 --> 00:13:01,753
Do you know anyone important?
343
00:13:01,759 --> 00:13:03,455
Oh, yeah. Okay, my unc-my uncle Donnie
344
00:13:03,461 --> 00:13:05,023
once did PCP back in the day,
345
00:13:05,029 --> 00:13:07,830
and now he thinks he's the mayor, so...
346
00:13:09,217 --> 00:13:12,485
You know, a lot of successful
people never went to college.
347
00:13:14,005 --> 00:13:16,134
Ah, look at him. He's
giving her the business. Ha.
348
00:13:16,140 --> 00:13:17,235
He's a real team player, that kid, huh?
349
00:13:17,241 --> 00:13:18,637
That's why I hired him.
350
00:13:18,643 --> 00:13:22,344
I thought it was because you
couldn't open the sprinkle jar.
351
00:13:23,514 --> 00:13:27,016
Remember, you kept calling it
a whore, and a son of a bitch?
352
00:13:28,352 --> 00:13:29,381
How did it go?
353
00:13:29,387 --> 00:13:30,682
Not great.
354
00:13:30,688 --> 00:13:32,517
She made me realize the only
way I'm getting into college
355
00:13:32,523 --> 00:13:35,520
is if I die, and they use
my body in science class.
356
00:13:35,526 --> 00:13:37,322
No, I'm talking about the truck.
357
00:13:37,328 --> 00:13:38,623
Is she gonna move the truck?
358
00:13:38,629 --> 00:13:40,092
I don't know, man.
359
00:13:40,098 --> 00:13:41,593
Why should she have to?
360
00:13:41,599 --> 00:13:44,529
She's just some poor Colombian
woman trying to make a living.
361
00:13:44,535 --> 00:13:45,864
Whose side are you on?
362
00:13:45,870 --> 00:13:47,466
Don't you see she's gonna
put me out of business?
363
00:13:47,472 --> 00:13:50,769
I-If she does, Arthur, I want
you to know I will be there.
364
00:13:50,775 --> 00:13:52,838
To buy this place at
30% of market value.
365
00:13:52,844 --> 00:13:54,039
Ugh...
366
00:13:54,045 --> 00:13:57,876
I actually thought you
were helping me out there.
367
00:13:57,882 --> 00:14:00,445
You're off your game,
kid, and it's not just her.
368
00:14:00,451 --> 00:14:02,247
It's all this college crap.
369
00:14:02,253 --> 00:14:03,949
“Crap”?
370
00:14:03,955 --> 00:14:05,350
What the hell is wrong with you?
371
00:14:05,356 --> 00:14:07,018
This is my future we're talking about.
372
00:14:07,024 --> 00:14:08,787
Well, I'm worried about my future, too.
373
00:14:08,793 --> 00:14:10,693
Yeah, but you got a lot less of it.
374
00:14:11,863 --> 00:14:13,725
Well, obviously, you don't have my back.
375
00:14:13,731 --> 00:14:15,060
- You ain't got mine, either.
- I don't want yours.
376
00:14:15,066 --> 00:14:16,394
Fine.
377
00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:18,667
Fine!
378
00:14:23,207 --> 00:14:25,441
- Just go!
- I'm trying!
379
00:14:30,214 --> 00:14:33,812
(SPRAY PAINT HISSING)
380
00:14:33,818 --> 00:14:35,317
Hey!
381
00:14:38,523 --> 00:14:40,085
Arthur, what the hell are you doing?
382
00:14:40,091 --> 00:14:42,487
In a hoodie? You look
like Eminem's grandfather.
383
00:14:42,493 --> 00:14:44,990
You know what, I'm sending a message.
384
00:14:44,996 --> 00:14:47,559
I wanted to write “Gentrifiers,
get out of Uptown”"
385
00:14:47,565 --> 00:14:49,661
but I ran out of truck.
386
00:14:49,667 --> 00:14:52,597
You got to plan it out before
you start tagging, dude.
387
00:14:52,603 --> 00:14:54,566
Besides, your-your Rs are backwards.
388
00:14:54,572 --> 00:14:57,402
Well, that was gonna be my thing.
389
00:14:57,408 --> 00:14:58,970
This ain't gonna solve anything.
390
00:14:58,976 --> 00:15:00,472
Oh, look who's changing his tune.
391
00:15:00,478 --> 00:15:02,674
When Starbucks moved in, who
was the first one over there
392
00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:04,009
- with a spray can?
- Okay.
393
00:15:04,015 --> 00:15:05,544
Yeah, but that was some gigantic,
394
00:15:05,550 --> 00:15:07,679
faceless corporation, man. All right?
395
00:15:07,685 --> 00:15:09,047
And Sofia's got a face.
396
00:15:09,053 --> 00:15:10,215
A good one.
397
00:15:10,220 --> 00:15:12,850
Sitting on top of a
bunch of other good stuff.
398
00:15:12,857 --> 00:15:14,452
Fine. You can give up.
399
00:15:14,458 --> 00:15:15,787
But I'm not.
400
00:15:15,793 --> 00:15:17,589
No, come on. Art... enough. Stop, man!
401
00:15:17,595 --> 00:15:18,790
There's smarter ways to do this.
402
00:15:18,795 --> 00:15:20,424
Give me that back.
403
00:15:20,431 --> 00:15:21,526
(SIREN WAILING)
404
00:15:21,532 --> 00:15:23,165
Okay.
405
00:15:27,247 --> 00:15:28,472
Oh of Course.
406
00:15:28,716 --> 00:15:32,414
White guy spends what,
uh, 27 minutes in jail?
407
00:15:32,420 --> 00:15:35,083
For your information,
it was a terrible ordeal.
408
00:15:35,089 --> 00:15:37,652
Yeah, his blood sugar
got a little bit low,
409
00:15:37,658 --> 00:15:40,622
so we gave him some
peanut butter crackers.
410
00:15:40,628 --> 00:15:42,824
Plus, I got a $200 ticket.
411
00:15:42,830 --> 00:15:44,993
Oh, speaking of which, Sofia
put her truck in the shop
412
00:15:44,999 --> 00:15:46,494
so she can get the
paint scraped off of it.
413
00:15:46,500 --> 00:15:48,002
I told her you'd pay for that, too.
414
00:15:48,104 --> 00:15:49,433
Oh, thanks, traitor.
415
00:15:49,439 --> 00:15:51,001
Just put it on my tab,
416
00:15:51,007 --> 00:15:52,769
with my boat, my harbor fee, and...
417
00:15:52,775 --> 00:15:53,970
Relax, man.
418
00:15:53,976 --> 00:15:55,138
Look, we'll figure it out.
419
00:15:55,144 --> 00:15:56,239
No, I'll figure it out.
420
00:15:56,245 --> 00:15:57,708
You've already got
one foot out the door.
421
00:15:57,714 --> 00:15:59,843
You still mad about
the college thing, man?
422
00:15:59,849 --> 00:16:02,116
Well, don't worry about
it, 'cause I'm not going.
423
00:16:03,781 --> 00:16:05,140
What? Why not?
424
00:16:05,260 --> 00:16:06,489
Look, the more I looked into it,
425
00:16:06,823 --> 00:16:08,652
the more I realized
college ain't for me.
426
00:16:08,658 --> 00:16:11,421
Besides, a lot of successful
people never went to college.
427
00:16:11,427 --> 00:16:14,358
Like Jay-Z. And Basquiat. And Beyoncé.
428
00:16:14,364 --> 00:16:15,592
See, I don't need college.
429
00:16:15,598 --> 00:16:18,065
Just need a crazy-ass name.
430
00:16:19,035 --> 00:16:20,330
- But Franco...
- It's cool.
431
00:16:20,336 --> 00:16:22,165
Maybe I'll get around
to it, but right now,
432
00:16:22,171 --> 00:16:23,667
I need to be here.
433
00:16:23,673 --> 00:16:25,736
If I leave Arthur alone, this
week, he's tagging up trucks,
434
00:16:25,742 --> 00:16:28,576
next week, he's
pistol-whipping the mailman.
435
00:16:31,914 --> 00:16:33,310
Is this what you want?
436
00:16:33,316 --> 00:16:35,245
What, for him to start
working again? Sure.
437
00:16:35,251 --> 00:16:37,180
Let me rephrase the question.
438
00:16:37,186 --> 00:16:40,183
Is this what you want, idiot?
439
00:16:40,189 --> 00:16:41,885
Well, you heard him.
He doesn't want to go.
440
00:16:41,891 --> 00:16:44,020
That's crap, and you know it.
441
00:16:44,026 --> 00:16:45,756
He's just freaking out.
442
00:16:45,762 --> 00:16:47,424
He needs your support.
443
00:16:47,430 --> 00:16:49,092
Yeah, what about me? I need support.
444
00:16:49,098 --> 00:16:50,527
This isn't about you.
445
00:16:50,533 --> 00:16:52,429
He wants to go to college.
446
00:16:52,435 --> 00:16:53,797
- Eh...
- And by the way,
447
00:16:53,803 --> 00:16:55,766
you're the one who got him
to apply in the first place.
448
00:16:55,772 --> 00:16:57,134
Yeah, I know, I know.
449
00:16:57,140 --> 00:16:59,035
It's just that I depend on him now.
450
00:16:59,041 --> 00:17:01,872
And I, uh, I like having him around.
451
00:17:01,878 --> 00:17:03,740
Aw. That's sweet.
452
00:17:03,746 --> 00:17:04,875
Eh...
453
00:17:04,881 --> 00:17:06,143
And so damn selfish.
454
00:17:06,149 --> 00:17:07,448
Oh...
455
00:17:08,317 --> 00:17:09,646
And pathetic for thinking
456
00:17:09,652 --> 00:17:12,449
that the kid's dream might
be to stay here forever.
457
00:17:12,455 --> 00:17:14,117
And also, Arthur, listen...
458
00:17:14,123 --> 00:17:17,124
All right, all right, all right.
459
00:17:20,763 --> 00:17:22,926
Here.
460
00:17:22,932 --> 00:17:24,728
Your new work schedule.
461
00:17:24,734 --> 00:17:25,996
(EXHALES)
462
00:17:26,002 --> 00:17:28,932
Did you give me a two-hour
lunch break every day?
463
00:17:28,938 --> 00:17:30,534
No, it's not for eating.
464
00:17:30,540 --> 00:17:32,269
You're studying for the SATs.
465
00:17:32,275 --> 00:17:33,837
Thanks.
466
00:17:33,843 --> 00:17:35,005
But I told you, I'm
not going to college.
467
00:17:35,011 --> 00:17:36,773
Oh, like hell you're not.
468
00:17:36,779 --> 00:17:38,508
Come on, it's your dream.
469
00:17:38,514 --> 00:17:40,544
I know you can't afford
those fancy classes,
470
00:17:40,550 --> 00:17:43,651
so... I'm gonna help you study.
471
00:17:44,487 --> 00:17:45,515
Word?
472
00:17:45,521 --> 00:17:47,684
Lot of words.
473
00:17:47,690 --> 00:17:51,254
Welcome to the Arthur
Przybyszewski Academy.
474
00:17:51,260 --> 00:17:53,290
- Thanks, man.
- All right.
475
00:17:53,296 --> 00:17:55,692
- Yeah, thanks.
- It's not a charity, you know?
476
00:17:55,698 --> 00:17:57,160
When you're on the clock,
I expect 100% from you.
477
00:17:57,166 --> 00:17:58,395
Oh, you're gonna get 100%.
478
00:17:58,401 --> 00:17:59,996
I'll work my ass off,
so you can get out there
479
00:18:00,002 --> 00:18:01,431
and enjoy that boat.
480
00:18:01,437 --> 00:18:03,099
Yeah, well, I'm gonna
sell that thing. (CHUCKLES)
481
00:18:03,105 --> 00:18:04,568
It's not very enjoyable
if you have to keep
482
00:18:04,574 --> 00:18:06,236
thinking about how much it costs.
483
00:18:06,242 --> 00:18:08,939
Uh, no. Hey... no, no, no.
D-Don't sell your boat, man.
484
00:18:08,945 --> 00:18:10,607
That is your dream.
485
00:18:10,613 --> 00:18:14,715
Besides, we're gonna need it.
486
00:18:16,085 --> 00:18:17,214
There you go.
487
00:18:17,220 --> 00:18:18,615
Thanks, man, but, yo,
488
00:18:18,621 --> 00:18:21,117
shouldn't we put this in
a paper bag or something?
489
00:18:21,123 --> 00:18:23,753
Nah. Prison made me hard.
490
00:18:23,759 --> 00:18:25,455
Come on, relax. It's a beautiful day.
491
00:18:25,461 --> 00:18:27,628
(ENGINE STARTS)
492
00:18:30,666 --> 00:18:32,295
You right, man.
493
00:18:32,301 --> 00:18:35,065
You know, I-I got to enjoy
the sun on my face, you know?
494
00:18:35,071 --> 00:18:37,200
The smell of salty sea air.
495
00:18:37,206 --> 00:18:38,635
(INHALES SHARPLY)
496
00:18:38,641 --> 00:18:40,937
- Oh, wait, that's urine.
- Yeah.
497
00:18:40,943 --> 00:18:44,441
(HORN HONKS)
498
00:18:44,447 --> 00:18:45,709
Hey.
499
00:18:45,715 --> 00:18:47,177
You can't park your boat there.
500
00:18:47,183 --> 00:18:48,411
You are so right.
501
00:18:48,417 --> 00:18:49,717
What was I thinking?
502
00:18:51,420 --> 00:18:54,088
- (COIN CLATTERS)
- Now we can.
503
00:18:55,925 --> 00:18:57,320
(WHOOPS) All right!
504
00:18:57,326 --> 00:18:59,593
(LAUGHING): All right! Yeah.
505
00:18:59,772 --> 00:19:01,186
♪ ♪
506
00:19:01,279 --> 00:19:03,609
So this is another
authentic Iraqi souvenir?
507
00:19:03,615 --> 00:19:08,296
Oh, yes. It's a Mesopotamian
fertility neck dress.
508
00:19:08,413 --> 00:19:09,882
Very rare.
509
00:19:09,953 --> 00:19:11,649
Because when you turn it this way,
510
00:19:11,655 --> 00:19:14,118
it seems like one of those neck
pillows you buy at the airport
511
00:19:14,124 --> 00:19:16,220
to help you sleep on the plane.
512
00:19:16,226 --> 00:19:18,188
Oh, my God. It's almost as if
513
00:19:18,194 --> 00:19:21,380
my ancestors could see into the future.
514
00:19:21,576 --> 00:19:23,075
I got to go.
515
00:19:24,311 --> 00:19:26,074
Oh, great. You're back.
516
00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:28,877
Don't worry, I parked in
front of the yoga studio.
517
00:19:28,883 --> 00:19:31,846
The owner doesn't spray-paint my
truck or yell “Die, yuppie scum"
518
00:19:31,852 --> 00:19:33,882
at all my customers.
519
00:19:33,888 --> 00:19:35,350
Eh, well, I'm really sorry about that,
520
00:19:35,356 --> 00:19:36,785
but you're still not welcome here.
521
00:19:36,791 --> 00:19:38,119
Oh, come on, please? I've been jonesing
522
00:19:38,125 --> 00:19:39,287
for one of your maple creams.
523
00:19:39,293 --> 00:19:40,688
They're honestly the best I've ever had.
524
00:19:40,694 --> 00:19:42,457
You're not gonna win
me over with flattery.
525
00:19:42,463 --> 00:19:46,227
You do realize I can still
press charges against you
526
00:19:46,233 --> 00:19:47,896
for vandalizing my truck.
527
00:19:47,902 --> 00:19:50,202
Maple cream for the lady.
528
00:19:51,772 --> 00:19:53,902
See? He's a big old teddy bear.
529
00:19:53,908 --> 00:19:55,804
(CHUCKLES) Just so you
know, as long as I'm here,
530
00:19:55,810 --> 00:19:57,872
you can hang out any time you want.
531
00:19:57,878 --> 00:20:00,141
Oh, I'm sorry. (LAUGHS)
532
00:20:00,147 --> 00:20:01,876
I think I gave you the wrong impression.
533
00:20:01,882 --> 00:20:03,178
I don't date artists.
534
00:20:03,184 --> 00:20:04,813
What? I'm not even asking you out.
535
00:20:04,819 --> 00:20:06,748
Good, because no.
536
00:20:06,754 --> 00:20:09,284
I didn't even ask you.
537
00:20:09,290 --> 00:20:11,452
AND BACK UP: why-why
don't you date artists?
538
00:20:11,458 --> 00:20:14,756
'Cause I've done it before,
and it always ends up the same.
539
00:20:14,762 --> 00:20:16,991
They want to paint me naked.
540
00:20:16,997 --> 00:20:20,528
That's just preposterous,
egregious and audacious.
541
00:20:20,534 --> 00:20:21,700
(MOUTHS)
542
00:20:22,970 --> 00:20:25,867
So these artists, where
might I see their work?
543
00:20:25,873 --> 00:20:27,202
(LAUGHS)
544
00:20:27,208 --> 00:20:28,603
Thanks for the donut.
545
00:20:28,609 --> 00:20:29,904
I'll be back for more.
546
00:20:29,910 --> 00:20:32,006
All right. You can come
back any time you want.
547
00:20:32,012 --> 00:20:34,809
A-And just so you know, I
don't date food truck ladies.
548
00:20:34,815 --> 00:20:38,283
Cool. So we're on the same page.
549
00:20:39,220 --> 00:20:41,031
I thought that would go different.
550
00:20:41,109 --> 00:20:43,742
- Synced & Corrected by Dragoniod -
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