00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 Translated By The Community Of WWW.MY-SUBS.COM 1 00:00:00,133 --> 00:00:04,668 ♪ Amazing grace ♪ 2 00:00:04,803 --> 00:00:08,171 ♪ How sweet, yeah, the sooo... ♪ 3 00:00:08,206 --> 00:00:10,640 There's a warble in the mike. Are you picking up on that? 4 00:00:10,675 --> 00:00:12,742 Are you planning on singing? 5 00:00:12,778 --> 00:00:14,044 No, no, no, no. 6 00:00:14,079 --> 00:00:15,512 I just want to be prepared for all possibilities, so... 7 00:00:15,547 --> 00:00:16,913 Hey! Oh, my God. No, you're early! 8 00:00:16,948 --> 00:00:18,348 This isn't what it's gonna look like, okay? 9 00:00:18,383 --> 00:00:20,383 This is all gonna be top shelf. 10 00:00:20,419 --> 00:00:22,252 And there's gonna be a water-bottle display 11 00:00:22,287 --> 00:00:23,653 on each of the three pillars, 12 00:00:23,688 --> 00:00:25,321 and I've hired this woman to literally walk around 13 00:00:25,357 --> 00:00:26,656 and create small-talk. 14 00:00:26,691 --> 00:00:28,158 I got some big news for the both of us. 15 00:00:28,193 --> 00:00:29,292 You ready for this? 16 00:00:29,327 --> 00:00:30,693 - I don't know. - Don't be scared. 17 00:00:30,729 --> 00:00:32,429 - Okay. Okay. - It's going to be good. 18 00:00:32,464 --> 00:00:34,564 "New York Magazine." 19 00:00:34,599 --> 00:00:35,717 - No! - Yes! 20 00:00:35,718 --> 00:00:36,918 - Don't do that. - I'm sorry. 21 00:00:36,934 --> 00:00:38,468 But I pitched your idea to these editors, 22 00:00:38,503 --> 00:00:40,336 and they loved it. 23 00:00:40,372 --> 00:00:42,739 So they want it ready to print ASAP. 24 00:00:42,774 --> 00:00:44,474 - Oh, my God... okay, I've... I'm blind. - You are? 25 00:00:44,509 --> 00:00:45,975 - I can't see. - Uh-oh, uh-oh. 26 00:00:46,011 --> 00:00:47,977 I have too much work to do, and I can't see. I'm kidding. 27 00:00:48,013 --> 00:00:49,379 I can see, but I need to get back to work right now. 28 00:00:49,414 --> 00:00:50,814 - Go for it. - Thank you so much. 29 00:00:50,849 --> 00:00:52,749 Alanna, yeah, no. Why are you touching the... 30 00:00:52,784 --> 00:00:54,417 we said just touch from the top. 31 00:00:54,453 --> 00:00:56,953 When you touch anywhere lower, we get fingerprints. 32 00:00:56,954 --> 00:00:59,999 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.MY-SUBS.com - 33 00:01:01,029 --> 00:01:04,864 Nothing was stolen. 34 00:01:04,900 --> 00:01:06,599 I mean, nothing was even moved. 35 00:01:06,635 --> 00:01:09,669 I just feel like whoever made this note 36 00:01:09,704 --> 00:01:12,105 must be a professional, right? 37 00:01:12,140 --> 00:01:15,308 Well, the way I see it is you got two choices. 38 00:01:15,343 --> 00:01:18,077 You, uh, you do what they say and stop, 39 00:01:18,113 --> 00:01:22,182 or you say screw those guys and you keep digging. 40 00:01:22,217 --> 00:01:25,084 Well, I mean, I can't just stop. 41 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:27,220 Yeah. 42 00:01:27,255 --> 00:01:28,855 All right, that's my girl. 43 00:01:28,890 --> 00:01:31,324 Should we check out this cult? 44 00:01:31,359 --> 00:01:34,527 I m... I mean, I already did that. 45 00:01:34,563 --> 00:01:36,062 Yeah, but did you go through their trash? 46 00:01:36,097 --> 00:01:37,530 No. 47 00:01:37,566 --> 00:01:40,233 Well, if you want to know what somebody's up to, 48 00:01:40,268 --> 00:01:42,435 you got to take a look at what they're throwing away. 49 00:01:42,470 --> 00:01:43,970 Mm, really? 50 00:01:44,005 --> 00:01:46,406 Hey, that's the kid from the fishing trip, huh? 51 00:01:46,441 --> 00:01:48,041 Yeah, that was the priest's son. 52 00:01:48,076 --> 00:01:49,509 And who's that? 53 00:01:49,544 --> 00:01:52,212 Uh, we used to be lovers. Hey, guys in the back. 54 00:01:52,247 --> 00:01:53,580 Can we please use 55 00:01:53,615 --> 00:01:55,315 the most recent version of the slide show? 56 00:01:55,350 --> 00:01:56,616 I've asked you to remove this fellow 57 00:01:56,651 --> 00:01:57,984 upwards of two to three times. 58 00:01:58,019 --> 00:01:59,686 Thank you! 59 00:01:59,721 --> 00:02:01,221 Yeah, sorry. We just got out of a relationship. 60 00:02:01,256 --> 00:02:03,523 I'm kind of, like, back in the single game, and... 61 00:02:03,558 --> 00:02:06,159 I feel you. Me too. It sucks. 62 00:02:06,194 --> 00:02:07,927 Oh, so y... you're single. 63 00:02:07,963 --> 00:02:08,928 Yeah, yeah. 64 00:02:08,964 --> 00:02:09,896 Oh. 65 00:02:09,931 --> 00:02:12,665 Here we are... two single men. 66 00:02:12,701 --> 00:02:14,767 Mm. 67 00:02:14,803 --> 00:02:18,238 Well, I have a big question to ask you. 68 00:02:18,273 --> 00:02:19,405 Okay, ask me. 69 00:02:19,441 --> 00:02:20,873 Why this? Why water? 70 00:02:20,909 --> 00:02:22,442 Uh, wow. 71 00:02:22,477 --> 00:02:27,580 Um, the political answer... someone has to. 72 00:02:27,616 --> 00:02:29,382 - Right. - You know, someone has to. 73 00:02:29,417 --> 00:02:32,552 Um, but the real answer 74 00:02:32,587 --> 00:02:36,789 if I'm being honest, um, survivor's guilt. 75 00:02:36,825 --> 00:02:38,524 Oh, right. I was gonna ask about that. 76 00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:40,126 Do you feel comfortable talking about it? 77 00:02:40,161 --> 00:02:43,196 Do I feel comfortable talking about the moment 78 00:02:43,231 --> 00:02:44,597 when my mom got the call 79 00:02:44,633 --> 00:02:46,899 that her son had stage-four lymphoma? 80 00:02:46,935 --> 00:02:48,701 - Mm. - Or when I found out 81 00:02:48,737 --> 00:02:50,737 that my sophomore year in high school 82 00:02:50,772 --> 00:02:52,538 might be my last year on Earth? 83 00:02:52,574 --> 00:02:54,674 Yeah, no, I actually do feel comfortable 84 00:02:54,709 --> 00:02:56,042 talking about that. 85 00:02:56,077 --> 00:02:58,344 What I would rather talk about is the moment 86 00:02:58,380 --> 00:03:01,681 where I realized that I am not the only one in pain. 87 00:03:01,716 --> 00:03:05,051 And [bleep] me for not realizing it sooner. 88 00:03:05,086 --> 00:03:06,786 Dina, do you think you could, like, zhoosh it 89 00:03:06,821 --> 00:03:08,321 - a little bit more? - Yeah. 90 00:03:08,356 --> 00:03:09,555 'Cause I feel a little bit like... krrkk, you know? 91 00:03:09,591 --> 00:03:10,623 Hi, Dunky! 92 00:03:10,659 --> 00:03:12,525 Uh, can we have a second? 93 00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:14,027 - Sure. - Bye. 94 00:03:14,062 --> 00:03:15,528 What's up? 95 00:03:15,563 --> 00:03:16,896 Really great scene earlier. 96 00:03:16,931 --> 00:03:18,598 - Thank you. - You're killing it. 97 00:03:18,633 --> 00:03:21,834 Um, remember what I said earlier? 98 00:03:21,870 --> 00:03:23,970 Garcia confronts the serial killer? 99 00:03:24,005 --> 00:03:27,740 Um, yeah. I'm, like, so excited. 100 00:03:27,776 --> 00:03:30,943 Well, uh, I just want you to be ready 101 00:03:30,979 --> 00:03:35,248 that when that happens, Garcia dies. 102 00:03:35,283 --> 00:03:36,949 What? 103 00:03:36,985 --> 00:03:38,518 I'm s... I'm sorry. 104 00:03:38,553 --> 00:03:41,120 Did you just say that I die? 105 00:03:41,156 --> 00:03:43,790 It's just where the story was going, 106 00:03:43,825 --> 00:03:45,458 and I think Kippy pitched it. 107 00:03:45,493 --> 00:03:46,559 Kippy?! 108 00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:47,994 And then we were like, "Yes," 109 00:03:48,029 --> 00:03:50,596 and it just sort of all came together. 110 00:03:50,632 --> 00:03:52,031 It just made sense. 111 00:03:52,067 --> 00:03:54,000 I just... I'm sorry. 112 00:03:54,035 --> 00:03:58,037 I thought I was, like, an incredible actor. 113 00:03:58,073 --> 00:03:59,238 Oh, you are. 114 00:03:59,274 --> 00:04:01,841 It's just that the show needs you to die. 115 00:04:01,876 --> 00:04:03,609 Is there, like, a SAG-AFTRA representative 116 00:04:03,645 --> 00:04:05,011 who I can talk to? 117 00:04:05,046 --> 00:04:07,513 There's no room for a discussion on this, Portia. 118 00:04:07,549 --> 00:04:09,682 I'm sorry. 119 00:04:09,718 --> 00:04:12,885 Um, I'm just gonna leave this here. 120 00:04:17,492 --> 00:04:19,125 Come on. 121 00:04:33,508 --> 00:04:35,241 - Pia? - Dory! 122 00:04:35,276 --> 00:04:37,410 - Hi. - You're back. 123 00:04:37,445 --> 00:04:39,178 Yeah, what are you doing here? 124 00:04:39,214 --> 00:04:40,713 I'm so happy to see you. 125 00:04:40,749 --> 00:04:44,350 Why are you, um, cleaning the floor with a toothbrush? 126 00:04:44,386 --> 00:04:46,119 I wanted to, for Edwin. 127 00:04:46,154 --> 00:04:47,854 It's the least I could do. 128 00:04:47,889 --> 00:04:49,489 Are you here to see Brick? 129 00:04:49,524 --> 00:04:51,891 No. Actually, no. 130 00:04:51,926 --> 00:04:53,926 I think I left my wallet here last night, 131 00:04:53,962 --> 00:04:56,529 - so we just came by just to... just to check. - We? 132 00:04:56,564 --> 00:04:58,564 Dory, are you here with someone else? 133 00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:00,066 No. No, I am not. No. I just... 134 00:05:00,101 --> 00:05:01,300 I didn't mean to... 135 00:05:01,336 --> 00:05:02,602 - Who is that? - Oh, okay. 136 00:05:02,637 --> 00:05:03,903 I'm sorry to bother you. Have a nice day! 137 00:05:03,938 --> 00:05:06,072 All right, come on, come on. 138 00:05:06,107 --> 00:05:09,776 Edwin! Brick! 139 00:05:09,811 --> 00:05:12,578 They're taking our trash! 140 00:05:12,614 --> 00:05:14,046 Go, go, go, go go! 141 00:05:18,932 --> 00:05:20,932 What's this? 142 00:05:20,967 --> 00:05:24,001 Uh, my girlfriend left those for all the neighbors. 143 00:05:24,037 --> 00:05:26,270 We just wanted to let everybody know 144 00:05:26,306 --> 00:05:28,239 we had a break-in last night. 145 00:05:28,274 --> 00:05:30,608 We wrote them in English and Spanish, so... 146 00:05:30,643 --> 00:05:32,243 You should get a weapon, just in case. 147 00:05:32,278 --> 00:05:34,145 I have a bat. 148 00:05:34,180 --> 00:05:35,980 I have something way better. 149 00:05:41,487 --> 00:05:43,354 - Mom. - Oh! 150 00:05:43,389 --> 00:05:46,724 I keep forgetting you have your own key. 151 00:05:46,759 --> 00:05:48,492 They're killing Garcia. 152 00:05:48,528 --> 00:05:49,593 Who's Garcia? 153 00:05:49,629 --> 00:05:51,128 My character on "Surviving Essex." 154 00:05:51,164 --> 00:05:53,464 Oh! I thought you were talking about a real person. 155 00:05:53,499 --> 00:05:56,033 No, Mom. Like, I don't get to do the show anymore. 156 00:05:56,069 --> 00:05:57,268 What did you do wrong? 157 00:05:57,303 --> 00:05:59,437 I didn't do anything wrong. They love me. 158 00:05:59,472 --> 00:06:01,439 No, let's be real, Portia. 159 00:06:01,474 --> 00:06:02,673 If they liked you, 160 00:06:02,709 --> 00:06:04,842 they would've kept you alive and talking. 161 00:06:04,877 --> 00:06:07,111 Mom, that's not how television works, okay? 162 00:06:07,146 --> 00:06:10,548 The creators have a story that they have to tell, 163 00:06:10,583 --> 00:06:11,983 and sometimes they kill 164 00:06:12,018 --> 00:06:14,518 their most beloved characters off 165 00:06:14,554 --> 00:06:16,354 to keep people entertained. 166 00:06:16,389 --> 00:06:18,356 Well, if you're going to defend them, 167 00:06:18,391 --> 00:06:21,892 I don't know what position you want me to take in this matter. 168 00:06:21,928 --> 00:06:23,995 I just came here 'cause I thought you could give me, 169 00:06:24,030 --> 00:06:25,129 like, a little sympathy. 170 00:06:25,164 --> 00:06:28,299 Oh, boo hoo. I mean, really, come on. 171 00:06:28,334 --> 00:06:31,068 Your character didn't make a lick of sense. 172 00:06:31,104 --> 00:06:34,105 I mean, here you are, this privileged white person 173 00:06:34,140 --> 00:06:37,308 from the Upper West Side playing an illegal immigrant 174 00:06:37,343 --> 00:06:39,810 who somehow gets a job with the NYPD? 175 00:06:39,846 --> 00:06:41,812 I mean, you're basically stealing 176 00:06:41,848 --> 00:06:43,547 from the Latina community. 177 00:06:44,583 --> 00:06:47,151 You watched it. 178 00:06:47,186 --> 00:06:49,020 Well... 179 00:06:54,093 --> 00:06:57,395 This is starting to feel a little useless. 180 00:06:57,430 --> 00:06:59,463 You know, that's the thing about P.I. work 181 00:06:59,499 --> 00:07:00,865 is there's a lot of dead ends. 182 00:07:00,900 --> 00:07:03,567 And then you're sitting outside in your car 183 00:07:03,603 --> 00:07:07,171 for the 15th straight hour, sick off deli coffee and... 184 00:07:07,206 --> 00:07:09,140 you know, you want to give up, 185 00:07:09,175 --> 00:07:12,143 thinking about how your dad never forgave you 186 00:07:12,178 --> 00:07:15,880 for not taking over the family business, 187 00:07:15,915 --> 00:07:20,351 and then boom... it just comes to you, you know? 188 00:07:20,386 --> 00:07:22,820 You put it all together and you figure out 189 00:07:22,855 --> 00:07:24,822 how to find that scared little girl 190 00:07:24,857 --> 00:07:26,590 and bring her back home to her family, 191 00:07:26,626 --> 00:07:28,025 safe and sound. 192 00:07:28,061 --> 00:07:30,461 And you remember why you're doing it to begin with, 193 00:07:30,496 --> 00:07:33,998 and that it's okay to be a lone wolf. 194 00:07:34,033 --> 00:07:36,367 That's a little cheesy. 195 00:07:36,402 --> 00:07:37,435 Sorry. 196 00:07:37,470 --> 00:07:39,203 No, no. 197 00:07:39,238 --> 00:07:42,173 - Nah. - That's great. 198 00:07:42,208 --> 00:07:44,075 Yeah, I don't know. You want another beer? 199 00:07:44,110 --> 00:07:46,343 - Yeah. - Yeah? 200 00:07:46,379 --> 00:07:47,878 All right. 201 00:07:50,049 --> 00:07:52,917 - Here. - Thanks. 202 00:07:54,420 --> 00:07:55,419 Jesus. 203 00:07:55,455 --> 00:07:57,555 Hey, why do you even have a taser? 204 00:07:57,590 --> 00:07:58,856 My aunt had it 205 00:07:58,891 --> 00:08:00,825 when she thought her life was in danger, 206 00:08:00,860 --> 00:08:04,628 but she doesn't need it anymore. She's dead. 207 00:08:04,664 --> 00:08:06,697 Could you not touch all my crap? 208 00:08:06,732 --> 00:08:08,065 What are you doing? 209 00:08:08,101 --> 00:08:10,668 So I looked it up, and the taser's worth $500, 210 00:08:10,703 --> 00:08:12,303 so I'm either gonna take one big thing 211 00:08:12,338 --> 00:08:13,404 that's equal to that 212 00:08:13,439 --> 00:08:15,806 or a bunch of small things that add up to that. 213 00:08:15,842 --> 00:08:17,174 - Okay? - No, you're not. 214 00:08:17,210 --> 00:08:19,009 Okay? Can you just take this back, then? 215 00:08:19,045 --> 00:08:20,711 Because I actually bought my stuff 216 00:08:20,746 --> 00:08:21,846 'cause I like my stuff. 217 00:08:21,881 --> 00:08:23,147 I don't like this. Take this. 218 00:08:23,182 --> 00:08:26,050 - No, we're already doing this. - Okay. 219 00:08:26,085 --> 00:08:28,319 How much is this? It's cute. 220 00:08:28,354 --> 00:08:30,921 Maybe I can wear it to lunch next week 221 00:08:30,957 --> 00:08:32,156 when I finally meet my dad. 222 00:08:32,191 --> 00:08:33,157 Jesus. 223 00:08:33,192 --> 00:08:34,758 Would you please put that back, okay? 224 00:08:34,794 --> 00:08:36,227 That's my girlfriend, Dory's. 225 00:08:36,262 --> 00:08:37,828 You don't have to look away. 226 00:08:37,864 --> 00:08:39,029 They're just human tits. 227 00:08:39,065 --> 00:08:40,998 I know I don't have to look away. 228 00:08:41,033 --> 00:08:43,200 I just prefer not to see your breasts. 229 00:08:43,236 --> 00:08:45,870 Look. Turn around. 230 00:08:47,340 --> 00:08:50,074 So, who do you think looks better, 231 00:08:50,109 --> 00:08:52,977 me or your girlfriend? 232 00:08:53,012 --> 00:08:56,213 I think that you both have a certain charm. 233 00:08:58,918 --> 00:09:00,551 Can you please take that off? 234 00:09:00,586 --> 00:09:02,853 - Okay. - Jesus. 235 00:09:03,738 --> 00:09:05,438 Our mission at Pour 236 00:09:05,473 --> 00:09:08,073 is to provide clean and healthy water for villages in Uganda. 237 00:09:08,109 --> 00:09:11,343 With your help, we can change the landscape of Africa 238 00:09:11,379 --> 00:09:14,046 and leave a legacy of life for tomorrow. 239 00:09:14,081 --> 00:09:16,081 Because we all speak the language of friendship. 240 00:09:16,117 --> 00:09:17,783 Thank you in advance for your support. 241 00:09:17,819 --> 00:09:20,619 Thank you! 242 00:09:24,091 --> 00:09:26,592 Thank you guys so much. Whoa. 243 00:09:26,627 --> 00:09:28,194 Sorry. 244 00:09:28,229 --> 00:09:30,296 It's like I've never been onstage before. 245 00:09:31,499 --> 00:09:33,032 I have. I have been onstage. 246 00:09:33,067 --> 00:09:34,667 Don't make me list my credits, 247 00:09:34,702 --> 00:09:37,036 um, I was Mack the Knife onstage 13 years ago 248 00:09:37,071 --> 00:09:39,205 in my high school production of "Threepenny Opera", bitch. 249 00:09:41,375 --> 00:09:42,708 Uh, what I do want to say 250 00:09:42,743 --> 00:09:44,643 is that when you take a sip of water tonight, 251 00:09:44,679 --> 00:09:46,445 I want you to feel [bleep] guilty. 252 00:09:48,115 --> 00:09:51,750 In all seriousness, we do need your help. 253 00:09:51,786 --> 00:09:53,853 We really do. 254 00:09:53,888 --> 00:09:57,289 We raised enough money to get here, tonight, 255 00:09:57,325 --> 00:10:01,260 but tonight-tonight, we need to raise enough money 256 00:10:01,295 --> 00:10:05,598 to make clean water in Africa a reality. 257 00:10:05,633 --> 00:10:07,633 Okay. 258 00:10:07,668 --> 00:10:09,435 If you guys are with me, let's do this. 259 00:10:09,470 --> 00:10:11,136 Okay? Invest in Pour. 260 00:10:15,109 --> 00:10:17,576 So how long have you and this Dory chick been together? 261 00:10:17,612 --> 00:10:21,447 I don't know, about three years. 262 00:10:21,482 --> 00:10:22,948 Why? 263 00:10:22,984 --> 00:10:25,084 What do you mean, "why"? 264 00:10:25,119 --> 00:10:28,120 I do not see you two together, dude. 265 00:10:28,155 --> 00:10:29,622 Um... 266 00:10:29,657 --> 00:10:31,957 I mean, like, we're really good friends, 267 00:10:31,993 --> 00:10:34,660 so we're really comfortable with each other, 268 00:10:34,695 --> 00:10:36,028 if that's what you mean. 269 00:10:36,063 --> 00:10:39,331 Sounds like you don't [bleep]. 270 00:10:39,367 --> 00:10:40,332 No, we do. 271 00:10:40,368 --> 00:10:42,234 Yeah, yeah. We definitely do. 272 00:10:42,270 --> 00:10:46,138 Not a lot lately, I guess, 'cause things have been 273 00:10:46,173 --> 00:10:49,508 pretty stressful around here, but, uh... 274 00:10:49,544 --> 00:10:52,878 we do. 275 00:11:03,291 --> 00:11:06,992 ♪ I see myself in your hazy eyes ♪ 276 00:11:07,028 --> 00:11:09,962 - ♪ Hands on my side, moves just like mine ♪ - I really like this song. 277 00:11:09,997 --> 00:11:14,233 I like songs that take you there, you know? 278 00:11:14,268 --> 00:11:15,901 Yeah. 279 00:11:23,210 --> 00:11:24,476 Wait, didn't you say 280 00:11:24,511 --> 00:11:26,378 you found a piece of a check earlier? 281 00:11:26,413 --> 00:11:28,080 - Can I see it? - Yeah. 282 00:11:30,351 --> 00:11:33,752 - This one? - Yeah. 283 00:11:33,787 --> 00:11:35,721 TW Brownway. 284 00:11:37,424 --> 00:11:40,926 I'm a head Realtor at TW Brownway. 285 00:11:40,961 --> 00:11:42,361 Wait, TW Brownway. 286 00:11:42,396 --> 00:11:44,463 That's the company that that crazy lady Lorraine 287 00:11:44,498 --> 00:11:45,931 I was telling you about... 288 00:11:45,966 --> 00:11:48,100 - that's the company that she worked for. - Huh. 289 00:11:48,135 --> 00:11:49,835 Maybe she actually did know something. 290 00:11:49,870 --> 00:11:52,037 Yeah, no, no, no. That's interesting. 291 00:11:52,072 --> 00:11:54,740 TW Brownway is real estate, so... 292 00:11:54,775 --> 00:11:58,477 I don't know, maybe they own the Bellow & Hare building? 293 00:11:58,512 --> 00:12:01,179 Yeah, but then why would TW Brownway 294 00:12:01,215 --> 00:12:03,415 be sending a check to the cult? 295 00:12:03,450 --> 00:12:05,284 Shouldn't it be the other way around? 296 00:12:05,319 --> 00:12:07,753 Ooh, you feel that? 297 00:12:07,788 --> 00:12:11,189 Hairs on the back of your neck standing up on end. 298 00:12:13,060 --> 00:12:14,660 What does Dory do to turn you on? 299 00:12:14,695 --> 00:12:17,796 Uh, I don't know. 300 00:12:17,831 --> 00:12:20,599 Does she dance for you? 301 00:12:20,634 --> 00:12:23,235 Yeah, like weddings. 302 00:12:23,270 --> 00:12:26,204 Does she bite your lip? 303 00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:30,409 No, but I understand what you're talking about. 304 00:12:30,444 --> 00:12:34,146 Does she sit on your big, fat snake? 305 00:12:38,752 --> 00:12:40,252 You're a nice guy. 306 00:12:40,287 --> 00:12:43,388 I'm tired of not knowing where all the nice guys are. 307 00:12:46,527 --> 00:12:49,761 Yeah, I have a girlfriend, so I can't, uh, do this. 308 00:12:49,797 --> 00:12:51,229 So does everybody. 309 00:12:52,967 --> 00:12:55,267 You got to go. 310 00:13:10,718 --> 00:13:14,786 I've never been more disrespected in my life. 311 00:13:16,790 --> 00:13:18,757 - This is crazy, right? - Yeah. 312 00:13:18,792 --> 00:13:21,159 - This is... this is really good. - Yeah. 313 00:13:21,195 --> 00:13:23,128 You don't think it's just, like, a coincidence, right? 314 00:13:23,163 --> 00:13:24,730 No, no. You do this stuff long enough, 315 00:13:24,765 --> 00:13:27,065 you realize there's no such thing as coincidence. 316 00:13:27,101 --> 00:13:28,767 In fact, you know what I think? 317 00:13:28,802 --> 00:13:30,736 What? 318 00:13:30,771 --> 00:13:34,573 Shit, I'm gonna get myself in trouble here. 319 00:13:34,608 --> 00:13:35,841 No, why? 320 00:13:37,444 --> 00:13:40,178 I just can't stop looking at you. 321 00:13:40,214 --> 00:13:42,080 Oh. 322 00:13:42,116 --> 00:13:43,315 ♪ What if we just want to dance? ♪ 323 00:13:43,350 --> 00:13:45,250 I just find you stunning. 324 00:13:45,285 --> 00:13:46,752 If you knew all the things 325 00:13:46,787 --> 00:13:49,054 I want to do to you right now... 326 00:13:52,259 --> 00:13:55,494 ♪ What if we want to dance? 327 00:13:55,529 --> 00:13:58,964 ♪ Nothing else matters, anyway ♪ 328 00:13:58,999 --> 00:14:01,233 ♪ So let's run away ♪ 329 00:14:02,331 --> 00:14:03,497 - You like that? - Oh. 330 00:14:03,532 --> 00:14:05,199 Me and my buddies all got it. 331 00:14:05,234 --> 00:14:07,234 I can't tell you what it means, though, 332 00:14:07,269 --> 00:14:09,102 'cause, you know, we took an oath. 333 00:14:09,138 --> 00:14:11,338 No, you don't have to tell me. It's okay. 334 00:14:11,373 --> 00:14:14,875 So sexy. 335 00:14:16,745 --> 00:14:18,645 Oh. 336 00:14:18,681 --> 00:14:20,414 Oh. 337 00:14:20,449 --> 00:14:23,116 Oh, shit. I got to take this. 338 00:14:23,152 --> 00:14:24,484 Yeah, sure. 339 00:14:27,656 --> 00:14:31,158 Yeah, huh? 340 00:14:31,193 --> 00:14:34,628 Oh, God damn it. That was today? 341 00:14:34,663 --> 00:14:37,598 Oh, well, isn't that perfect? 342 00:14:37,633 --> 00:14:40,133 You know what, though? Steven is not her father. 343 00:14:40,259 --> 00:14:42,726 No... hey! 344 00:14:42,761 --> 00:14:45,595 Calm the [bleep] down! 345 00:14:45,631 --> 00:14:49,066 Hello? God! 346 00:14:53,439 --> 00:14:55,138 - Really sorry about that. - Oh. 347 00:14:55,174 --> 00:14:56,573 You know, that's not the way 348 00:14:56,608 --> 00:14:58,875 that I wanted to, you know, tell you... 349 00:14:58,911 --> 00:15:00,243 I... is everything okay? 350 00:15:00,279 --> 00:15:02,546 - No, it's my ex-wife. - Oh, right. 351 00:15:02,581 --> 00:15:04,781 - I have a daughter, Caitlin. - Mm. 352 00:15:04,817 --> 00:15:06,817 Here, I got a picture of her on here. 353 00:15:06,852 --> 00:15:09,519 It's a while ago. They grow up really fast. 354 00:15:09,555 --> 00:15:11,755 Yeah, she's beautiful. Yeah. 355 00:15:15,294 --> 00:15:18,595 You know, I probably, uh... 356 00:15:18,630 --> 00:15:20,931 I probably shouldn't say this so directly, 357 00:15:20,966 --> 00:15:23,467 but I'm really starting to fall for you. 358 00:15:23,502 --> 00:15:26,036 - Wow. - I know, I know. No, no, hey. 359 00:15:26,071 --> 00:15:27,237 - That's quick. - No... 360 00:15:27,272 --> 00:15:28,472 - I know, I know. - Yeah, yeah. 361 00:15:28,507 --> 00:15:30,040 It's very... it's very soon, you know? 362 00:15:30,075 --> 00:15:31,742 - Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. - But you don't have to say anything. 363 00:15:31,777 --> 00:15:33,243 - Okay, all right I won't. No. - Don't say anything. 364 00:15:33,278 --> 00:15:35,078 - You just let it marinate. - Yeah. Okay. 365 00:15:35,114 --> 00:15:37,414 - Yeah, mm-hmm. - You want to join me in the shower? 366 00:15:37,449 --> 00:15:39,249 - No, I'm okay, actually. - You sure? 367 00:15:39,284 --> 00:15:41,251 I think I'm just gonna, like, chill here 368 00:15:41,286 --> 00:15:42,285 and look at my phone. 369 00:15:42,321 --> 00:15:43,820 - Okay. - Yep. 370 00:15:48,293 --> 00:15:52,195 Oh, hey. You know, I was thinking, TW Brownway... 371 00:15:52,230 --> 00:15:54,330 they cut rebate checks for taxes, 372 00:15:54,366 --> 00:15:57,133 so it's possible that could be a coincidence, 373 00:15:57,169 --> 00:16:00,069 but I think we should check it out anyway. 374 00:16:00,105 --> 00:16:01,905 Yeah, sure. 375 00:16:07,879 --> 00:16:09,679 You sure you don't want to join? 376 00:16:09,714 --> 00:16:11,314 I got a real nice body wash. 377 00:16:11,349 --> 00:16:12,982 Smells like grapes. 378 00:16:29,414 --> 00:16:31,381 - Hey. - Hey. 379 00:16:31,416 --> 00:16:36,452 Uh, neighbor came over earlier, gave us a taser. 380 00:16:36,488 --> 00:16:39,222 Oh. 381 00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:46,362 Hey, you think it'd be good for us to have this, right? 382 00:16:46,398 --> 00:16:48,831 You know, so I can protect us. 383 00:16:48,867 --> 00:16:52,068 Yeah. 384 00:16:55,340 --> 00:17:00,276 Um, so I ordered some Brooklyn Soul. 385 00:17:00,311 --> 00:17:02,178 I wasn't sure if you're hungry. 386 00:17:02,213 --> 00:17:03,479 Oh. 387 00:17:03,515 --> 00:17:05,381 If you want any, it should be here soon. 388 00:17:05,417 --> 00:17:06,983 That was nice of you. 389 00:17:07,218 --> 00:17:12,655 Uh, yeah, I just kind of want to take a shower 390 00:17:12,690 --> 00:17:14,524 and get into my PJs, you know? 391 00:17:14,559 --> 00:17:17,194 Okay, yeah. 392 00:17:18,229 --> 00:17:21,097 Hey, Dory, I got to tell you something. 393 00:17:21,132 --> 00:17:23,800 Um, okay, so, you know the neighbor 394 00:17:23,835 --> 00:17:25,435 came over with the taser. 395 00:17:25,470 --> 00:17:28,104 Um, and I didn't invite her over 396 00:17:28,139 --> 00:17:29,872 or anything like that. 397 00:17:29,908 --> 00:17:33,009 She just came and was, like, hanging out, 398 00:17:33,044 --> 00:17:35,745 and then one thing led to another 399 00:17:35,780 --> 00:17:37,880 and she put on some music, 400 00:17:37,916 --> 00:17:40,450 and, uh, she started dancing. 401 00:17:41,485 --> 00:17:44,487 You know, like sexy dancing. 402 00:17:44,522 --> 00:17:46,989 Okay. 403 00:17:47,025 --> 00:17:48,491 And that was it. 404 00:17:48,526 --> 00:17:51,194 I mean, she put on the music, and then she started, like, 405 00:17:51,229 --> 00:17:53,896 moving around the living room with her hips 406 00:17:53,932 --> 00:17:55,164 and stuff like that, 407 00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:57,300 and she, you know, came close to me, 408 00:17:57,335 --> 00:17:59,936 but then when I started to realize what had happened, 409 00:17:59,971 --> 00:18:01,804 I stopped the music and I kicked her out. 410 00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:02,972 And that's it. 411 00:18:03,007 --> 00:18:05,074 There was no kissing or anything... 412 00:18:05,110 --> 00:18:06,542 anything like that. 413 00:18:06,578 --> 00:18:10,513 It was just that... dancing and then she's out. 414 00:18:13,785 --> 00:18:15,485 Oh, my God. Dory, are you upset? 415 00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:16,385 No. 416 00:18:16,421 --> 00:18:18,354 Hey, hey, look. I'm so sorry. 417 00:18:18,389 --> 00:18:20,723 Nothing happened. I promise. 418 00:18:20,758 --> 00:18:22,458 No, I know. It's okay. 419 00:18:22,494 --> 00:18:23,659 I am so sorry. 420 00:18:23,695 --> 00:18:26,028 I swear, I would never do anything to hurt you. 421 00:18:26,064 --> 00:18:27,930 I'm so sorry. I messed up. 422 00:18:31,302 --> 00:18:36,372 I'm just tired. I'm just really tired. 423 00:18:36,407 --> 00:18:37,473 Are you sure? 424 00:18:37,509 --> 00:18:38,741 I promise you. 425 00:18:38,776 --> 00:18:40,877 - You can tell me if you're mad at me. - No. No. 426 00:18:40,912 --> 00:18:42,245 It's okay. I understand. 427 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,380 - Baby, I'm sorry. - I'm just tired. 428 00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:50,653 - You sure? - Yeah. 429 00:18:56,962 --> 00:19:00,096 So what's next for the great Elliott Goss? 430 00:19:00,131 --> 00:19:02,365 You know, I just want to be good to myself. 431 00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:05,168 You know, maybe drink a little too much tonight, 432 00:19:05,203 --> 00:19:07,870 find a heated pool, invite a friend. 433 00:19:07,906 --> 00:19:10,239 You want me to be your friend? 434 00:19:10,275 --> 00:19:11,074 Mm-hmm. 435 00:19:11,109 --> 00:19:13,276 Okay. Well, one last question. 436 00:19:13,311 --> 00:19:14,877 Mm. 437 00:19:14,913 --> 00:19:19,248 Um, you said in your sophomore year of high school, 438 00:19:19,284 --> 00:19:22,218 - you developed cancer, right? - Mm-hmm. 439 00:19:22,253 --> 00:19:23,653 It was like... it was like 15? 440 00:19:23,688 --> 00:19:25,188 - 15, yeah. - Oh, my gosh. 441 00:19:25,223 --> 00:19:28,091 I am still trying to wrap my head around the fact 442 00:19:28,126 --> 00:19:30,994 that you were bedridden with stage-four lymphoma 443 00:19:31,029 --> 00:19:33,429 while playing the physically challenging lead role 444 00:19:33,465 --> 00:19:37,100 of Mack the Knife. 445 00:19:37,135 --> 00:19:38,768 Okay, so... so I was 16. 446 00:19:38,803 --> 00:19:39,836 You were 16. You were 16. 447 00:19:39,871 --> 00:19:41,237 - 16. - Oh, my gosh. 448 00:19:41,272 --> 00:19:42,705 - Always switch those two. - Totally understand. 449 00:19:42,741 --> 00:19:44,474 Well, I'm just going to write that down 450 00:19:44,509 --> 00:19:47,443 and check in with your family, your friends, 451 00:19:47,479 --> 00:19:49,979 and your doctors just to make sure 452 00:19:50,015 --> 00:19:52,148 that everything is squared away. 453 00:19:52,183 --> 00:19:56,786 You know, like the truth. 454 00:19:59,991 --> 00:20:01,758 Hmm. 455 00:20:01,793 --> 00:20:03,926 'Cause I feel that our readers 456 00:20:03,962 --> 00:20:07,130 are gonna want to know who you really are. 457 00:20:10,935 --> 00:20:13,336 I have to go to the bathroom. 458 00:20:13,371 --> 00:20:15,071 Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's right over there. 459 00:20:15,106 --> 00:20:17,874 Yeah, I'm gonna pop out, but you hang out. 460 00:20:17,909 --> 00:20:19,742 - Thanks. - And I'll be right back. 461 00:20:19,778 --> 00:20:21,310 - Do you want another one? - Yes. 462 00:20:21,346 --> 00:20:23,646 I would love one. Thank you. 463 00:20:23,681 --> 00:20:25,181 Mm-hmm. 464 00:20:55,018 --> 00:20:59,799 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.MY-SUBS.com -