1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX

2
00:00:06,876 --> 00:00:09,226
[wind howling]

3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

4
00:00:09,270 --> 00:00:11,272
[birds twittering]

5
00:00:12,708 --> 00:00:14,405
[sounds growing louder]

6
00:00:21,891 --> 00:00:23,588
[soft static buzzing]

7
00:00:23,632 --> 00:00:26,026
[video equipment clattering]

8
00:00:29,246 --> 00:00:34,556
So you might wonder
why I just clapped,

9
00:00:34,599 --> 00:00:37,211
uh...

10
00:00:37,254 --> 00:00:41,171
because I'm sitting
in my studio by myself

11
00:00:41,215 --> 00:00:44,087
and am I,

12
00:00:44,131 --> 00:00:45,828
am I applauding myself?

13
00:00:45,871 --> 00:00:48,352
[electronica playing]

14
00:00:48,396 --> 00:00:51,790
I guess a good place to start
is a simple question.

15
00:00:51,834 --> 00:00:53,183
Why in the world

16
00:00:53,227 --> 00:00:56,534
would I want to make
a documentary about myself?

17
00:00:59,146 --> 00:01:02,714
And I think that's a pretty
legitimate question.

18
00:01:02,758 --> 00:01:05,065
[upbeat electronica playing]

19
00:01:05,108 --> 00:01:07,502
Thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you, thank you.

20
00:01:07,545 --> 00:01:10,896
Thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you, thank you!

21
00:01:19,166 --> 00:01:21,951
On one hand,
I've had a strange life.

22
00:01:21,994 --> 00:01:25,781
I grew up very poor in
a very wealthy environment.

23
00:01:27,521 --> 00:01:31,221
My strange life as a musician
has taken me

24
00:01:31,265 --> 00:01:35,182
to a lot of very odd places,
literally and figuratively.

25
00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:40,229
And I guess I could make
a documentary about that.

26
00:01:40,274 --> 00:01:43,886
Just another biopic
about a weird musician.

27
00:01:46,410 --> 00:01:51,807
What's more interesting is,
at least to me, is...

28
00:01:53,287 --> 00:01:55,898
well, the why of it.

29
00:01:57,465 --> 00:01:58,944
The why of everything.

30
00:01:58,988 --> 00:02:00,816
The, why do we do what we do?

31
00:02:02,296 --> 00:02:04,254
Our very short lives

32
00:02:04,298 --> 00:02:08,258
quite possibly have
very little significance.

33
00:02:08,301 --> 00:02:12,175
As far as we can tell, we're
in a universe that is vast

34
00:02:12,219 --> 00:02:14,090
beyond our imagining,

35
00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:16,136
ancient beyond our imagining.

36
00:02:17,789 --> 00:02:21,706
But yet, all of us
generally work from a place

37
00:02:21,750 --> 00:02:24,274
where we think that
our actions have meaning,

38
00:02:24,318 --> 00:02:26,668
our lives have consequences.

39
00:02:29,018 --> 00:02:30,976
And that if we do things
in a certain way,

40
00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:32,978
if we do things in a right way,

41
00:02:33,022 --> 00:02:36,939
that our lives
might somehow be better.

42
00:02:36,982 --> 00:02:40,290
If I had legitimacy,
if I had some money,

43
00:02:40,334 --> 00:02:42,292
if I was recognized
for what I did

44
00:02:42,336 --> 00:02:44,947
and for who I was,
and if I was esteemed...

45
00:02:44,990 --> 00:02:48,777
One of the most innovative
figures in the world of
electronic dance music, Moby.

46
00:02:48,820 --> 00:02:51,345
...happiness,
and meaning would ensue.

47
00:02:51,388 --> 00:02:54,739
And honestly, that's why
I want to make this movie,

48
00:02:54,783 --> 00:02:57,567
because I think that a lot of us

49
00:02:57,612 --> 00:03:00,310
still work
under those assumptions,

50
00:03:00,354 --> 00:03:02,225
that if we do the right thing,

51
00:03:02,269 --> 00:03:06,229
if we have the right
existential portfolio,

52
00:03:06,273 --> 00:03:09,754
if we have the right people,
the right amount of money,

53
00:03:09,798 --> 00:03:11,843
the right home or homes,

54
00:03:11,887 --> 00:03:14,368
the right job,
the right amount of recognition,

55
00:03:14,411 --> 00:03:18,154
then everything
will suddenly make sense

56
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:21,591
and we'll be happy
and we'll live for a long time

57
00:03:21,636 --> 00:03:22,985
and we will die contented.

58
00:03:27,903 --> 00:03:33,213
There's one huge problem
with that, though.

59
00:03:33,256 --> 00:03:37,695
That's never actually been
the case for anyone.

60
00:03:37,739 --> 00:03:42,656
It's almost like we assume
that it's not true
for everyone else,

61
00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:48,793
but that if we figure it out,
like if I figure out my perfect
existential portfolio,

62
00:03:48,837 --> 00:03:54,016
that I will find
perfect human happiness,

63
00:03:54,059 --> 00:03:57,672
but I tried, and it didn't work.

64
00:04:08,378 --> 00:04:10,293
[ethereal electronica playing]

65
00:04:28,746 --> 00:04:30,270
This is my dream.

66
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,778
[ambient electronica pulsing]

67
00:05:13,878 --> 00:05:15,706
[upbeat electronica playing]

68
00:05:51,525 --> 00:05:54,658
- [music stops]
- [cow lowing in distance]

69
00:05:58,575 --> 00:06:01,709
So we're revisiting

70
00:06:01,752 --> 00:06:07,149
New York City in 1966.

71
00:06:07,192 --> 00:06:09,281
So yes, I was born in Harlem.

72
00:06:09,325 --> 00:06:12,720
Let's make it nighttime.

73
00:06:12,763 --> 00:06:15,592
Rrrrr... There's New York City.

74
00:06:15,636 --> 00:06:17,507
- [horns honking]
- Rrrr, rrrr!

75
00:06:19,944 --> 00:06:23,383
My dad, we'll have him
wearing glasses

76
00:06:23,426 --> 00:06:28,475
because the truth is, I don't
remember my father at all,

77
00:06:28,518 --> 00:06:32,957
but in my mind he wore glasses,

78
00:06:33,001 --> 00:06:37,353
and unlike me, he had hair.

79
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:41,618
My mom, because I'm not
the best drawer in the world,

80
00:06:41,662 --> 00:06:44,795
I have a feeling she's
going to look...

81
00:06:44,839 --> 00:06:49,234
Oh, she actually looks
almost feminine, maybe.

82
00:06:49,278 --> 00:06:51,976
Little baby me.

83
00:06:52,020 --> 00:06:54,457
We also need some animals.

84
00:06:54,501 --> 00:07:00,028
When I was growing up in Harlem
we had a pet dog,

85
00:07:00,071 --> 00:07:03,118
one or two cats,
and a bunch of rats,

86
00:07:03,161 --> 00:07:06,338
because my father was,

87
00:07:06,382 --> 00:07:08,471
he worked in the chemistry
department at Columbia

88
00:07:08,515 --> 00:07:11,039
and he brought home
some test rats.

89
00:07:11,082 --> 00:07:13,650
They were in their twenties.

90
00:07:13,694 --> 00:07:17,132
They were in New York,
and they hung out in the Village

91
00:07:17,175 --> 00:07:20,352
and talked about poetry
and politics.

92
00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:30,972
And they had me,

93
00:07:31,015 --> 00:07:32,930
and then very quickly
realized like,

94
00:07:32,974 --> 00:07:37,544
"Oh, having a newborn in
a basement apartment in Harlem."

95
00:07:37,587 --> 00:07:40,721
And my dad had been
a heavy drinker apparently,

96
00:07:40,764 --> 00:07:43,680
but then apparently he started
drinking more and more and more,

97
00:07:43,724 --> 00:07:47,249
- and my mom yelling...
- Get out of my house!

98
00:07:47,292 --> 00:07:48,903
- ...him yelling back...
- Yaaaaaa!

99
00:07:48,946 --> 00:07:51,906
And then him disappearing
on drunken binges.

100
00:07:51,949 --> 00:07:56,519
So because I lived
with two very angry parents

101
00:07:56,563 --> 00:07:59,827
who were screaming at each other
and smoking cigarettes
and drinking,

102
00:07:59,870 --> 00:08:05,485
the only calm sort of stable
presence in the apartment

103
00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:06,877
were the animals.

104
00:08:06,921 --> 00:08:10,228
The cat, the dog,
the rescued lab rats,

105
00:08:10,272 --> 00:08:12,535
represented here by chihuahuas.

106
00:08:12,579 --> 00:08:16,147
At an early age, when I was
a tiny little baby,

107
00:08:16,191 --> 00:08:21,892
I learned a lesson, which is
that animals are nice
and people are terrifying.

108
00:08:21,936 --> 00:08:26,941
And then after a couple of years
of this, they had a huge fight,

109
00:08:26,984 --> 00:08:30,814
and my mother told my father,
"I can't do this anymore.

110
00:08:30,858 --> 00:08:34,731
I want a divorce, and I'm taking
your son away from you."

111
00:08:34,775 --> 00:08:39,736
So, my father got drunk

112
00:08:39,780 --> 00:08:41,650
and got in his car...

113
00:08:52,575 --> 00:08:54,359
and drove into a wall...

114
00:08:55,883 --> 00:08:57,580
at a hundred miles an hour.

115
00:08:57,624 --> 00:09:00,104
[car crashes]

116
00:09:00,148 --> 00:09:03,847
So my mother was a widow
at the age of 23

117
00:09:03,891 --> 00:09:05,762
with her crying newborn,

118
00:09:05,806 --> 00:09:10,767
a bunch of animals
in a basement apartment
in Harlem.

119
00:09:22,083 --> 00:09:25,565
[ominous ambient music playing]

120
00:09:27,828 --> 00:09:30,395
[somber electronica playing]

121
00:10:17,399 --> 00:10:19,227
[marching band playing]

122
00:10:24,928 --> 00:10:26,016
[music stops]

123
00:10:26,060 --> 00:10:27,670
Hi.

124
00:10:27,714 --> 00:10:30,151
So I'm Moby and I'm
the director of this scene

125
00:10:30,194 --> 00:10:33,633
and we will be reenacting
some scenes from my childhood.

126
00:10:33,676 --> 00:10:35,417
- I'd like to introduce
our players.
- [upbeat music playing]

127
00:10:35,460 --> 00:10:37,941
Laura, would you step in?

128
00:10:37,985 --> 00:10:40,204
This is Laura
and she'll be playing my mom.

129
00:10:40,248 --> 00:10:43,599
Hi, I'm Laura Dawn
and I'm playing Moby's mom.

130
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,688
Daniel, would you like
to step in?

131
00:10:45,732 --> 00:10:48,256
Who will be playing my mom's
scumbag boyfriend.

132
00:10:48,299 --> 00:10:50,998
Hi, my name is Daniel Ahearn.

133
00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:53,522
I'll be playing
the scumbag boyfriend.

134
00:10:55,045 --> 00:10:56,438
And this is Daron,

135
00:10:56,481 --> 00:11:00,616
and he'll be playing me
at about age, say three.

136
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,706
Hi, my name's Daron Murphy
and I'll be playing young Moby.

137
00:11:03,750 --> 00:11:06,491
MOBY: Yeah. Perfect.
Life has already gone wrong.

138
00:11:06,535 --> 00:11:09,930
You're only three years old,
and basically nothing good
has ever happened.

139
00:11:11,758 --> 00:11:15,849
- You guys are
getting ready to go out.
- Let's go.

140
00:11:15,892 --> 00:11:18,765
So you're a local motorcycle
gang member...

141
00:11:24,553 --> 00:11:26,990
but you're just,
you're just scummy.

142
00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:31,255
- Bye, Moby. We'll be back
in a couple of hours.
- Don't touch my stuff.

143
00:11:31,299 --> 00:11:36,652
That was great.
The only thing was you were
a little too involved.

144
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:39,176
[laughing] OK.

145
00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:42,745
- MOBY: And action.
- LAURA: All right, Moby,
we're taking off.

146
00:11:42,789 --> 00:11:46,227
We're going to go out
to this party and we'll
be back later, okay?

147
00:11:46,270 --> 00:11:48,359
Bye, Molly.

148
00:11:48,403 --> 00:11:50,492
[in falsetto]
♪ Hello! Hello! Hello!

149
00:11:50,535 --> 00:11:53,451
- Poor Moby.
- Yeah, yeah, mm-hmm.

150
00:11:53,495 --> 00:11:56,454
I wish we could save him.
We'd be your friends, Moby.

151
00:11:56,498 --> 00:11:58,500
- Oh yeah.
- Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah.

152
00:11:58,543 --> 00:12:00,850
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

153
00:12:00,894 --> 00:12:06,160
My mom is upset
because she's unemployed,
her boyfriend has left her,

154
00:12:06,203 --> 00:12:10,730
and young me is going
to try to comfort her.

155
00:12:10,773 --> 00:12:12,819
Nothing ever works out.

156
00:12:12,862 --> 00:12:14,777
Dan left.

157
00:12:14,821 --> 00:12:16,561
Again.

158
00:12:16,605 --> 00:12:19,086
And I still haven't found a job.

159
00:12:19,129 --> 00:12:21,305
So I don't know
what we're gonna do.

160
00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:23,743
- Mom--
- Just leave me alone!

161
00:12:27,007 --> 00:12:28,095
Well done.

162
00:12:28,138 --> 00:12:30,793
A little more sadness.

163
00:12:30,837 --> 00:12:33,535
Well, okay, no, dial it down,
just not quite so much sadness.

164
00:12:33,578 --> 00:12:38,235
A little, little more,
just sort of like soft pathos.

165
00:12:38,279 --> 00:12:40,411
[door creaking open]

166
00:12:40,455 --> 00:12:42,587
That's okay.
No, come on in.

167
00:12:42,631 --> 00:12:45,155
We're doing really
important stuff.

168
00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:47,027
[in falsetto]
Oh, that's very sad.

169
00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:49,812
- That's a big
apartment to me.
- Call Child Services!

170
00:12:49,856 --> 00:12:54,382
His first experience,
if you think about your mother
being the center of your world,

171
00:12:54,425 --> 00:12:57,951
the idea that
if you're the focal point
of someone's world

172
00:12:57,994 --> 00:13:01,563
and all they know about love
and trust and stability
in the world,

173
00:13:01,606 --> 00:13:03,913
but you are not stable,

174
00:13:03,957 --> 00:13:08,352
then that produces
a cascade of effects
in a developing mind

175
00:13:08,396 --> 00:13:11,355
that can really mess up
the rest of their lives.

176
00:13:11,399 --> 00:13:13,575
He was left in places
and situations

177
00:13:13,618 --> 00:13:16,186
that a kid that's three,
four or five, six years old,

178
00:13:16,230 --> 00:13:17,492
should not be left in.

179
00:13:17,535 --> 00:13:19,363
And there was a lot
of drug abuse.

180
00:13:19,407 --> 00:13:21,409
There was a lot of alcoholism.

181
00:13:21,452 --> 00:13:24,020
I think that he suffers
from anxious attachment.

182
00:13:24,064 --> 00:13:27,197
When I hear
so much of his music,

183
00:13:27,241 --> 00:13:31,985
I hear the pain and emotion
and longing that he feels
towards his mother.

184
00:13:32,028 --> 00:13:35,597
That to me is a core dragon
he's been chasing
his entire life

185
00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:39,122
as some kind of understanding
and resolution to that pain.

186
00:13:43,387 --> 00:13:49,437
[indistinct conversations]

187
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:53,180
MOBY: When I was very, very
young, I grew up playing
in New York and Connecticut.

188
00:13:53,223 --> 00:13:55,008
[crowd cheering]

189
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:59,795
And at that time,
like my only goal was
to at some point

190
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:04,191
put out a seven-inch that maybe
sold a hundred copies.

191
00:14:04,234 --> 00:14:08,499
I never ever,
ever in a billion years

192
00:14:08,543 --> 00:14:12,895
thought I would be playing
with one of the most
remarkable orchestras.

193
00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:16,638
- [cheering and applause]
- So I just wanted to say
thank you all so much.

194
00:14:20,207 --> 00:14:23,253
Such a beautiful orchestra.
Such a friendly orchestra.

195
00:15:12,172 --> 00:15:16,306
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

196
00:15:16,350 --> 00:15:20,354
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

197
00:15:20,397 --> 00:15:24,488
♪ Don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

198
00:15:24,532 --> 00:15:29,015
♪ Don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

199
00:15:29,058 --> 00:15:33,062
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

200
00:15:33,106 --> 00:15:36,718
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

201
00:15:36,761 --> 00:15:41,114
♪ Well, don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

202
00:15:41,157 --> 00:15:45,509
♪ Oh, don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

203
00:15:45,553 --> 00:15:49,122
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

204
00:15:49,165 --> 00:15:53,169
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

205
00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:58,087
♪ Oh, don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

206
00:15:58,131 --> 00:16:02,135
♪ Don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

207
00:16:02,178 --> 00:16:06,313
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

208
00:16:06,356 --> 00:16:09,881
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

209
00:16:09,925 --> 00:16:14,190
♪ Don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

210
00:16:14,234 --> 00:16:19,152
♪ Don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

211
00:16:19,195 --> 00:16:23,243
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

212
00:16:23,286 --> 00:16:27,987
♪ Oh, Lordy,
my trouble so hard ♪

213
00:16:28,030 --> 00:16:31,642
♪ Don't nobody know
my troubles but God ♪

214
00:16:33,209 --> 00:16:35,211
♪ Don't nobody know

215
00:16:35,255 --> 00:16:37,997
♪ My trouble

216
00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:42,914
♪ But God

217
00:16:42,958 --> 00:16:46,222
[cheering and applause]

218
00:16:58,234 --> 00:17:00,280
[a/v equipment clattering]

219
00:17:02,978 --> 00:17:06,676
When a human being
truly dives within all the way,

220
00:17:06,721 --> 00:17:09,028
negativity begins to lift away.

221
00:17:09,070 --> 00:17:13,423
Hate, anger, fear,
all these things start to lift.

222
00:17:13,467 --> 00:17:17,645
The suffocating
rubber clown suit
of negativity dissolving,

223
00:17:17,688 --> 00:17:20,213
and pure gold
coming in from within.

224
00:17:20,256 --> 00:17:22,867
[relaxed music playing]

225
00:17:26,262 --> 00:17:29,222
MOBY: So for a while, we lived
in Darien, Connecticut,

226
00:17:29,265 --> 00:17:32,312
which is one of the wealthiest
towns in the United States.

227
00:17:32,355 --> 00:17:35,402
And I was certainly the poorest
person that I knew there.

228
00:17:35,445 --> 00:17:37,273
I hated it.

229
00:17:37,317 --> 00:17:39,449
Not being able to bring people
back to my house.

230
00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:42,539
When I say "bring people,"
I mean like friends
in elementary school,

231
00:17:42,583 --> 00:17:48,154
but as I had learned early on,
animals were safe,

232
00:17:48,197 --> 00:17:51,635
and animals didn't judge me,

233
00:17:51,679 --> 00:17:55,117
and I never had to feel
shame around animals.

234
00:17:55,161 --> 00:17:57,163
[cattle lows]

235
00:17:57,206 --> 00:18:00,731
So I'd found animals,
and then I found music.

236
00:18:04,996 --> 00:18:09,131
And then I picked up a guitar
one of my Mom's boyfriends
had left at the house,

237
00:18:09,175 --> 00:18:13,353
and I started playing around
and very quickly
I discovered punk rock.

238
00:18:13,396 --> 00:18:15,833
[punk rock playing]

239
00:18:24,842 --> 00:18:30,457
And I fell in love
with The Clash, Bad Brains,
Minor Threat, Black Flag.

240
00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:32,589
And I also found a home.

241
00:18:32,633 --> 00:18:37,159
I found this amazing community
of misfits and confused
teenagers like me,

242
00:18:37,203 --> 00:18:40,293
and I felt comfortable
and at home for the first time,

243
00:18:40,336 --> 00:18:43,470
and I just wanted to play
in a punk rock band.

244
00:18:43,513 --> 00:18:45,776
And I guess that's
when I dedicated my life

245
00:18:45,820 --> 00:18:48,431
to these two things,
animals and music.

246
00:18:59,616 --> 00:19:01,749
[clock ticking]

247
00:19:18,853 --> 00:19:20,202
I've been looking forward
to our session.

248
00:19:20,246 --> 00:19:21,986
- It's good to see you again.
- Oh yeah.

249
00:19:22,030 --> 00:19:24,685
Can I get you water
or a cup of tea?

250
00:19:24,728 --> 00:19:27,166
[discordant
ambient sounds echoing]

251
00:19:39,265 --> 00:19:41,528
I want to know more
about your feelings.

252
00:19:41,571 --> 00:19:44,357
How have you been able
to process your feelings

253
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:48,056
and what you experienced as
a child through your music?

254
00:19:48,099 --> 00:19:51,929
We've talked about this before
that sometimes you refer
to yourself

255
00:19:51,973 --> 00:19:53,322
in the third person,

256
00:19:53,366 --> 00:19:55,585
which is intellectualizing,

257
00:19:55,629 --> 00:19:58,762
and I'm wondering if you can
connect to your feelings

258
00:19:58,806 --> 00:20:01,374
and tell me about it
from that perspective.

259
00:20:01,417 --> 00:20:06,248
Well, growing up,
I always felt uncomfortable
if I'm being honest

260
00:20:06,292 --> 00:20:10,644
and I felt really
disconnected and unsafe.

261
00:20:10,687 --> 00:20:14,430
I know this sounds
like hyperbole,

262
00:20:14,474 --> 00:20:16,389
this sounds like I'm
overstating, but music saved me.

263
00:20:16,432 --> 00:20:20,436
I felt connected to this bigger
world that was so much better

264
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:25,224
and more interesting than
the sad suburban world
I was inhabiting.

265
00:20:25,267 --> 00:20:29,271
Can you just tell me
a little bit more about
how you felt about that?

266
00:20:29,315 --> 00:20:34,058
I was able to like take
all of the things
that I was feeling...

267
00:20:35,756 --> 00:20:39,194
and make sense of them,
and sort of make them

268
00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:41,588
you know, take the fear
and make it interesting,

269
00:20:41,631 --> 00:20:46,854
and take my confusion
and try to make it beautiful.

270
00:20:46,897 --> 00:20:53,295
And so the act of making music
was almost like a form
of like self-healing,

271
00:20:53,339 --> 00:20:57,081
but also in a way
that maybe other people

272
00:20:57,125 --> 00:21:00,563
could relate to or understand.

273
00:21:00,607 --> 00:21:02,739
[banjo playing]

274
00:21:04,524 --> 00:21:07,178
♪ I know that we've been

275
00:21:07,222 --> 00:21:10,269
♪ In a fairly conventional
narrative for a little while ♪

276
00:21:10,312 --> 00:21:16,275
♪ But now we're gonna
go back to being weird ♪

277
00:21:16,318 --> 00:21:18,581
[discordant ambience echoing
over traffic noises]

278
00:21:22,890 --> 00:21:25,501
[bowl chimes]

279
00:21:30,027 --> 00:21:31,638
Everyone chant!

280
00:21:31,681 --> 00:21:33,901
- [chimes]
- [group chanting]

281
00:21:36,686 --> 00:21:39,123
[bowl chiming]

282
00:21:49,786 --> 00:21:50,918
[chanting continues]

283
00:22:05,933 --> 00:22:08,501
[discordant noise echoing
over furtive whispers]

284
00:22:14,376 --> 00:22:16,683
Someone asked me
this question recently,

285
00:22:16,726 --> 00:22:21,340
if I were an animal,
what would,

286
00:22:21,383 --> 00:22:23,820
or how would my consciousness
be different?

287
00:22:23,864 --> 00:22:25,561
And it's
a fascinating question.

288
00:22:25,605 --> 00:22:30,958
So when I look at an animal
like, like, look at buffalo.

289
00:22:35,441 --> 00:22:39,532
I wonder if sometimes
one of the reasons

290
00:22:39,575 --> 00:22:42,361
that people kill animals,

291
00:22:42,404 --> 00:22:45,929
one of the reasons that people
treat animals so badly

292
00:22:45,973 --> 00:22:48,149
is because of loneliness,

293
00:22:48,192 --> 00:22:52,283
is because they look at animals
and they feel rejected by them.

294
00:22:52,327 --> 00:22:55,983
You know, they look at a buffalo
and buffalo are stoic

295
00:22:56,026 --> 00:23:00,379
and apparently quite happy
to just hang out
with other buffalo,

296
00:23:00,422 --> 00:23:02,990
and they have their own concerns
and their own priorities.

297
00:23:03,033 --> 00:23:05,906
Like the desire
to not get eaten,

298
00:23:05,949 --> 00:23:08,778
the desire to not be hungry,

299
00:23:08,822 --> 00:23:13,653
the desire to spend time
with your family,
with your community.

300
00:23:13,696 --> 00:23:19,572
But sometimes nature has
an indifference towards humans.

301
00:23:19,615 --> 00:23:24,185
And the animals, like let's say
like a buffalo, they don't care.

302
00:23:24,228 --> 00:23:28,450
And I think sometimes
that almost justifies

303
00:23:28,494 --> 00:23:30,974
people's cruelty to animals,

304
00:23:31,018 --> 00:23:32,933
is they're punishing the animals

305
00:23:32,976 --> 00:23:37,503
for having their own lives
independent of us.

306
00:23:37,546 --> 00:23:40,070
The animal is almost like

307
00:23:40,114 --> 00:23:44,771
an emissary of
the vast existential void

308
00:23:44,814 --> 00:23:46,903
that we're all so afraid of.

309
00:23:53,083 --> 00:23:54,476
[static buzzing]

310
00:24:03,616 --> 00:24:08,925
♪ 'Cause in my dreams
I'm dying all the time ♪

311
00:24:12,276 --> 00:24:17,238
♪ Then I wake
it's kaleidoscopic mind ♪

312
00:24:20,284 --> 00:24:24,114
♪ I never meant to hurt you

313
00:24:24,158 --> 00:24:27,378
♪ I never meant to lie

314
00:24:30,077 --> 00:24:32,862
♪ So this is goodbye

315
00:24:34,647 --> 00:24:36,344
♪ This is goodbye

316
00:24:51,664 --> 00:24:53,230
♪ So tell the truth

317
00:24:53,274 --> 00:24:56,407
♪ You never wanted me

318
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:00,847
♪ Tell the truth

319
00:25:00,890 --> 00:25:04,503
♪ You never wanted me

320
00:25:05,982 --> 00:25:07,941
♪ Tell me

321
00:25:30,006 --> 00:25:35,403
♪ 'Cause in my dreams
I'm jealous all the time ♪

322
00:25:38,362 --> 00:25:43,933
♪ When I wake
I'm going out of my mind ♪

323
00:25:43,977 --> 00:25:47,894
♪ I'm going out of my mind

324
00:25:47,937 --> 00:25:51,985
♪ Going out of my mind

325
00:25:52,028 --> 00:25:55,902
♪ Going out of my mind

326
00:26:02,473 --> 00:26:05,651
[ominous music playing]

327
00:26:10,830 --> 00:26:13,441
My friend gave me some acid.

328
00:26:13,484 --> 00:26:16,357
And I thought this
was really interesting,

329
00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:18,185
'cause I'd never
done acid before

330
00:26:19,752 --> 00:26:22,755
and it lasted
for about 15 hours.

331
00:26:22,798 --> 00:26:27,150
And then a day later
I had a panic attack,

332
00:26:27,194 --> 00:26:30,327
and the panic attack lasted
for about six months.

333
00:26:35,681 --> 00:26:40,729
It was so bad that I had to drop
out of school and moved home

334
00:26:40,773 --> 00:26:44,994
back to my mom's house,
and it was really grim.

335
00:26:58,007 --> 00:27:04,448
19 years old, unemployed, broke,
battling constant panic attacks,

336
00:27:04,492 --> 00:27:08,104
going to my local bar,
getting drunk with alcoholics

337
00:27:08,148 --> 00:27:11,455
just 'cause
that was the only thing
that would make the panic abate.

338
00:27:18,245 --> 00:27:22,379
When friends from college
would drop me off...

339
00:27:22,423 --> 00:27:23,772
[sighs]

340
00:27:23,816 --> 00:27:26,775
...I would have them
drop me off here,

341
00:27:26,819 --> 00:27:30,039
and for a brief minute, I would
pretend that I lived here.

342
00:27:35,175 --> 00:27:41,094
Everybody I knew who grew up
like the rich people here

343
00:27:41,137 --> 00:27:46,621
just felt entitled
and were kind of arrogant
and obnoxious,

344
00:27:46,665 --> 00:27:50,233
but anyone who grew up
even slightly poor here,

345
00:27:50,277 --> 00:27:52,671
you just felt this like stain
of inadequacy

346
00:27:52,714 --> 00:27:55,848
because everybody knew exactly
how much money
everyone else had.

347
00:27:55,891 --> 00:27:58,328
No matter where you went,
you just always felt,

348
00:27:58,372 --> 00:28:02,202
if you're poor growing up here,
you just always felt like
a second-class citizen.

349
00:28:02,245 --> 00:28:04,378
In my case,
like an 11th-class citizen.

350
00:28:11,167 --> 00:28:13,692
That was my fantasy
when I was growing up,

351
00:28:13,735 --> 00:28:19,436
to live in a house
like this and drink tea
and sit by a roaring fire,

352
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:23,789
and read Blake

353
00:28:23,832 --> 00:28:26,400
while the golden retriever
was asleep at my feet

354
00:28:26,443 --> 00:28:29,664
and my beautiful wife was,
I don't know,

355
00:28:29,708 --> 00:28:35,061
writing poetry at her desk
by the leaded window panes.

356
00:28:35,104 --> 00:28:37,933
And then I moved
to an abandoned factory.

357
00:28:37,977 --> 00:28:40,457
[discordant electronica playing]

358
00:29:02,088 --> 00:29:05,787
This huge, weird
factory complex,

359
00:29:05,831 --> 00:29:08,529
I mean millions
and millions of square feet.

360
00:29:08,572 --> 00:29:11,227
It had been a lock factory
in Stamford, Connecticut.

361
00:29:11,271 --> 00:29:16,406
But when I moved in,
it was completely empty
and I paid $50 a month.

362
00:29:16,450 --> 00:29:19,105
What I thought of
as squatter's rent.

363
00:29:19,148 --> 00:29:22,456
There was a security guard,
and I'd give them $50 a month,

364
00:29:22,499 --> 00:29:27,113
and I didn't have running water,
I didn't have heat,

365
00:29:27,156 --> 00:29:28,897
but I had electricity.

366
00:29:28,941 --> 00:29:32,379
And so I had my studio
and it, my space was tiny.

367
00:29:32,422 --> 00:29:36,775
I mean, so tiny,
it was basically like
a big glorified closet.

368
00:29:36,818 --> 00:29:39,778
And I worked on music.

369
00:29:43,433 --> 00:29:48,003
I was DJing
just a couple days a week.

370
00:29:48,047 --> 00:29:51,615
$25 to DJ for six hours.

371
00:29:51,659 --> 00:29:56,707
And this whole huge factory
building was empty,

372
00:29:56,751 --> 00:29:59,101
except for me
and like a few other artists
who are squatting in it.

373
00:30:04,628 --> 00:30:08,154
The two years I lived here,
I think three people
got murdered.

374
00:30:08,197 --> 00:30:10,852
My friend Jamie
got stabbed to death here.

375
00:30:10,896 --> 00:30:14,421
I loved it, because I had free
electricity and my space,

376
00:30:14,464 --> 00:30:16,858
even though it was
very small, was sunny
and I didn't have heat,

377
00:30:16,902 --> 00:30:20,209
but I had space heaters
that I borrowed
from my girlfriend's mom.

378
00:30:22,255 --> 00:30:26,825
Now, Moby, did you grow up
in your punk rock days,

379
00:30:26,868 --> 00:30:30,219
did you live in factories?

380
00:30:30,263 --> 00:30:32,482
As a matter of fact, I did.

381
00:30:32,526 --> 00:30:36,051
Um, but old factories,
the desolation

382
00:30:36,095 --> 00:30:38,575
and like the entropy of them,

383
00:30:38,619 --> 00:30:41,535
'cause they're such
sturdy structures.

384
00:30:41,578 --> 00:30:45,321
Normally things when they're
abandoned collapse,

385
00:30:45,365 --> 00:30:48,629
but what's great about factories
is they're abandoned
and they stick around,

386
00:30:48,672 --> 00:30:52,981
you know, and the bricks become
interesting and the floors
get dusty and interesting.

387
00:30:53,025 --> 00:30:58,030
And especially when the old
machinery is too heavy
to move, you know?

388
00:30:58,073 --> 00:31:00,119
So they're just like,
we're just going to leave it.

389
00:31:00,162 --> 00:31:02,208
- You're talking my type.
- [laughs]

390
00:31:02,251 --> 00:31:04,645
[electronica playing]

391
00:31:04,688 --> 00:31:08,518
And that's when I started making

392
00:31:08,562 --> 00:31:13,219
my own almost exclusively
electronic music.

393
00:31:13,262 --> 00:31:15,961
And then I started working
at a record store,

394
00:31:16,004 --> 00:31:18,746
so I was able to buy
more records and DJ more.

395
00:31:18,789 --> 00:31:21,357
And then I started DJing Friday
nights and Saturday nights.

396
00:31:21,401 --> 00:31:26,188
And then there was
this magic day when I learned
how to mix two records together.

397
00:31:26,232 --> 00:31:29,844
And all of a sudden I realized
like, "Oh, that sounded okay."

398
00:31:29,888 --> 00:31:31,585
Like, "I guess I'm a DJ now."

399
00:31:35,067 --> 00:31:39,071
I had the worst sampler
in the world and a little
four-track,

400
00:31:39,114 --> 00:31:42,901
and so I made my idea
of what hip-hop
should sound like

401
00:31:42,944 --> 00:31:46,687
and my idea
of what house music
and techno should be.

402
00:31:46,730 --> 00:31:49,864
I mean, keep in mind,
house music had just
been invented

403
00:31:49,908 --> 00:31:52,693
and techno had
just been invented,

404
00:31:52,736 --> 00:31:54,913
but with my little
Casio keyboard

405
00:31:54,956 --> 00:31:59,352
and my cheap Roland drum machine
and my little sequencer,

406
00:31:59,395 --> 00:32:02,921
I tried to make electronic music

407
00:32:02,964 --> 00:32:06,794
and I had no idea what was
going on with me

408
00:32:06,837 --> 00:32:10,102
or my life or my future,
but I had some really
good friends,

409
00:32:10,145 --> 00:32:12,800
and I was surprisingly happy.

410
00:32:12,843 --> 00:32:16,325
And I remember trying to explain
that to my family,

411
00:32:16,369 --> 00:32:20,895
how in hindsight it was
one of the happiest times
of my life.

412
00:32:20,939 --> 00:32:23,506
[electronica continues]

413
00:32:54,537 --> 00:32:56,452
[wind whistling]

414
00:33:17,299 --> 00:33:19,649
[electronic
ambient music surging]

415
00:33:58,123 --> 00:34:01,648
- [music fades, resumes]
- [wind howling]

416
00:34:04,564 --> 00:34:06,174
- [in falsetto] Ah!
- Run for your lives!

417
00:34:06,218 --> 00:34:07,697
Let's go to space!

418
00:34:07,741 --> 00:34:10,222
[upbeat electronica playing]

419
00:34:46,170 --> 00:34:49,087
There, 205 East 14th Street,

420
00:34:49,130 --> 00:34:52,132
that was my first apartment
in New York City.

421
00:34:52,177 --> 00:34:54,440
Uh...

422
00:34:54,483 --> 00:34:58,139
And I'm pretty sure,
I had a bunch of roommates,

423
00:34:58,183 --> 00:35:03,710
but my rent was around $150
a month, $160 a month.

424
00:35:06,887 --> 00:35:10,891
Growing up in Connecticut,
I fetishized New York City.

425
00:35:10,934 --> 00:35:14,242
New York was 30,
40 miles away,

426
00:35:14,286 --> 00:35:16,505
and it was easy
to get to on the train.

427
00:35:16,549 --> 00:35:20,944
And so my friends and I
growing up went to New York
every chance we could.

428
00:35:20,988 --> 00:35:25,166
It's where the best record
stores were, it's where we saw
all our first punk rock shows.

429
00:35:25,210 --> 00:35:28,126
And we were amazed
that we could just get
on the train

430
00:35:28,169 --> 00:35:31,781
and hide in the bathroom
and 40 minutes later
be in Grand Central.

431
00:35:31,825 --> 00:35:36,569
Not to overstate it,
but this train saved my life
and made me who I am.

432
00:35:36,612 --> 00:35:41,008
I would make the tapes
in my abandoned factory,

433
00:35:41,051 --> 00:35:46,187
get off in Grand Central,
jump the turnstile, and then
just go around giving out tapes.

434
00:35:46,231 --> 00:35:48,189
Years of doing this.

435
00:35:48,233 --> 00:35:50,887
My first record label
came from that,

436
00:35:50,931 --> 00:35:55,327
other DJing jobs came from that,
being introduced to all
the producers of the day.

437
00:35:55,370 --> 00:35:59,374
I heard about this club called
Mars that was opening.

438
00:35:59,418 --> 00:36:02,986
It was going to be
the coolest nightclub
in the world.

439
00:36:03,030 --> 00:36:06,294
Somehow the man
who was booking Mars

440
00:36:06,338 --> 00:36:09,167
listened to it
and gave me a job.

441
00:36:09,210 --> 00:36:11,734
My first record label
came from that,

442
00:36:11,778 --> 00:36:14,737
so it all started
with that one job at Mars.

443
00:36:17,131 --> 00:36:19,002
♪ Go, go, go...

444
00:36:19,046 --> 00:36:22,354
♪ Well, I came here to rock,
turn it on and on ♪

445
00:36:22,397 --> 00:36:24,530
♪ Keep it going
till the break of dawn ♪

446
00:36:24,573 --> 00:36:26,358
[funky electronica playing]

447
00:36:31,363 --> 00:36:33,930
♪ Yeah!

448
00:36:33,974 --> 00:36:36,150
[cheering]

449
00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:39,022
[muffled shouting
over rhythmic percussion]

450
00:36:57,606 --> 00:37:02,481
In 1990, I put out
a song called "Go."

451
00:37:02,524 --> 00:37:06,354
And this came out
and did nothing.

452
00:37:06,398 --> 00:37:09,357
It sold maybe 1500 copies.

453
00:37:09,401 --> 00:37:13,448
And then after it was released,

454
00:37:13,492 --> 00:37:16,364
a record label guy in the UK
heard it

455
00:37:16,408 --> 00:37:19,019
and wanted to release it,
but needed a remix.

456
00:37:19,062 --> 00:37:22,588
And at this time I was obsessed
with Twin Peaks,

457
00:37:22,631 --> 00:37:25,417
and somehow
I had this weird idea

458
00:37:25,460 --> 00:37:31,336
of adding the strings
from Laura Palmer's theme
from Twin Peaks

459
00:37:31,379 --> 00:37:34,252
to this remix
I was working on for "Go."

460
00:37:36,776 --> 00:37:38,430
So I came up with this remix,

461
00:37:38,473 --> 00:37:41,868
and then I played the chords
to Laura Palmer's theme

462
00:37:41,911 --> 00:37:43,522
on top of the remix.

463
00:37:43,565 --> 00:37:47,613
DAVID LYNCH: Yes. Well, Moby
did that song "Go,"

464
00:37:47,656 --> 00:37:52,705
and that was based on pieces
of Angelo's music
in Twin Peaks.

465
00:37:52,748 --> 00:37:57,536
I thought it was fantastic,
and a lot of other people
thought that too.

466
00:38:11,637 --> 00:38:13,247
♪ Go!

467
00:38:16,729 --> 00:38:22,082
And it became a top-ten record
throughout Europe
and it sold a million copies.

468
00:38:22,125 --> 00:38:23,475
♪ Go!

469
00:38:25,999 --> 00:38:29,219
So my first single
sold 1500 copies,

470
00:38:29,263 --> 00:38:31,483
and my next single sold
a million copies.

471
00:38:31,526 --> 00:38:34,442
That's a big turning point,

472
00:38:34,486 --> 00:38:38,403
and it was so profoundly
unexpected.

473
00:38:40,405 --> 00:38:44,452
So the fact that it became
this weird, weird hit single,

474
00:38:44,496 --> 00:38:48,500
where I was going back and forth
to the UK every two weeks
and DJing in raves

475
00:38:48,543 --> 00:38:52,025
and playing at raves
and being on all sorts
of different TV shows

476
00:38:52,068 --> 00:38:57,117
and being on Top of the Pops,
like none of this was expected.

477
00:38:57,160 --> 00:38:59,902
I had never thought
that I would live in New York.

478
00:38:59,946 --> 00:39:02,340
I had never thought that
I would have a record deal.

479
00:39:02,383 --> 00:39:05,168
I never thought that I would
leave the United States.

480
00:39:05,212 --> 00:39:07,954
I never thought that anyone
would make an effort

481
00:39:07,997 --> 00:39:10,173
to listen to the music
that I was making.

482
00:39:10,217 --> 00:39:12,828
And then all of a sudden I was
doing interviews for magazines.

483
00:39:12,872 --> 00:39:16,049
And then I was on the cover
of dance magazines,
and I was on TV shows,

484
00:39:16,092 --> 00:39:19,400
Spin'salbum of the year,
the Village Voice's
album of the year.

485
00:39:19,444 --> 00:39:23,404
And I had a big hit single
in Europe, I had music
in a Michael Mann movie,

486
00:39:23,448 --> 00:39:26,407
and I went on tour with
the Red Hot Chili Peppers
and the Flaming Lips.

487
00:39:26,451 --> 00:39:30,977
Like by the end of 1995,
things were kind of magical.

488
00:39:31,020 --> 00:39:33,936
All that had happened,
and I had expected none of it.

489
00:39:33,980 --> 00:39:36,417
And I was financially stable
for the first time in my life.

490
00:39:36,461 --> 00:39:38,550
And I bought an apartment,
my very own apartment,

491
00:39:38,593 --> 00:39:42,858
with a real studio
with soundproof walls
and a skylight.

492
00:39:52,302 --> 00:39:55,436
♪ I see the stars...

493
00:39:59,092 --> 00:40:04,097
♪ I see the stars

494
00:40:06,273 --> 00:40:09,276
I still remember,
I was on British Airways

495
00:40:09,319 --> 00:40:12,671
flying to the UK
to do Top of the Pops,

496
00:40:12,714 --> 00:40:17,937
and I saw in the newspaper
my song "Go" in the charts

497
00:40:17,980 --> 00:40:21,375
in between Michael Jackson
and Phil Collins.

498
00:40:21,419 --> 00:40:25,858
♪ I see the stars

499
00:40:28,426 --> 00:40:31,211
Can you talk to me
about how that felt?

500
00:40:31,254 --> 00:40:33,648
Not just intellectualizing
that time,

501
00:40:33,692 --> 00:40:36,825
but really unpack your feelings
around that for me?

502
00:40:36,869 --> 00:40:41,482
It felt baffling, confusing,

503
00:40:41,526 --> 00:40:44,398
dislocating,
but it felt wonderful.

504
00:40:44,442 --> 00:40:48,271
I'd been playing music
for 15 years

505
00:40:48,315 --> 00:40:51,536
and every day of those
15 years thinking like,

506
00:40:51,579 --> 00:40:53,015
how can I have an audience?

507
00:40:53,059 --> 00:40:55,278
How can I finally,
like at some point,

508
00:40:55,322 --> 00:40:57,803
even like get a record deal
and make records?

509
00:40:57,846 --> 00:41:02,198
But I never really expected
that that would happen.

510
00:41:02,242 --> 00:41:06,202
♪ These open doors

511
00:41:06,246 --> 00:41:11,599
♪ These open doors

512
00:41:11,643 --> 00:41:16,082
♪ These open doors

513
00:41:16,125 --> 00:41:20,956
♪ These open doors

514
00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:23,568
♪ These open

515
00:41:23,611 --> 00:41:26,048
♪ These open

516
00:41:26,092 --> 00:41:30,009
♪ These open doors

517
00:41:30,052 --> 00:41:33,316
♪ These open

518
00:41:33,360 --> 00:41:37,364
♪ These open

519
00:41:37,407 --> 00:41:40,628
♪ Open doors

520
00:41:40,672 --> 00:41:45,328
♪ These...

521
00:41:47,592 --> 00:41:50,333
♪ Open doors

522
00:41:50,377 --> 00:41:52,684
♪ These open

523
00:41:52,727 --> 00:41:55,425
♪ These open

524
00:41:55,469 --> 00:41:59,734
♪ These open doors

525
00:42:05,174 --> 00:42:10,223
[bell chiming hour
over rattling ambience]

526
00:42:10,266 --> 00:42:12,965
How many people right now
are beating themselves up

527
00:42:13,008 --> 00:42:16,142
because they think they're
not successful enough,
they're not famous enough,

528
00:42:16,185 --> 00:42:18,840
they're not young enough,
they're not beautiful enough,
and like...

529
00:42:18,884 --> 00:42:23,062
But then the people who are
super young, super attractive,

530
00:42:23,105 --> 00:42:27,066
super famous,
they're miserable, you know?

531
00:42:27,109 --> 00:42:32,550
So it's this, it's this
horrifying, I don't know...

532
00:42:32,593 --> 00:42:35,596
Like I don't have to pretend
to be younger than I am.

533
00:42:35,640 --> 00:42:37,990
I don't have to pretend
to be more attractive than I am.

534
00:42:38,033 --> 00:42:39,644
- I don't have to wear a toupee.
- Yeah.

535
00:42:39,687 --> 00:42:43,648
I don't have to pretend
that I'm still young

536
00:42:43,691 --> 00:42:48,000
and relevant in the same way
that I was 20 years ago
or 15 years ago.

537
00:42:48,043 --> 00:42:50,655
One of the hardest things,
at least for me,
and I assume for you,

538
00:42:50,698 --> 00:42:55,442
for lots of people,
is the reason we overcompensate,

539
00:42:55,485 --> 00:43:00,969
the reason we try
to get people to see us
in like exalted lights

540
00:43:01,013 --> 00:43:03,885
is because deep down
we don't like ourselves.

541
00:43:03,929 --> 00:43:05,974
- Like we're ashamed
of ourselves.
- Yeah.

542
00:43:06,018 --> 00:43:11,632
Um, we assume that if anyone
looks too closely,
they'll be repelled.

543
00:43:11,676 --> 00:43:14,330
Especially if they look at me
at this angle.
Something like that.

544
00:43:14,374 --> 00:43:16,594
And like looking at it
yourself,

545
00:43:16,637 --> 00:43:19,161
but then like being
that in the presence
of other people

546
00:43:19,205 --> 00:43:24,210
for as potentially unattractive
and uncomfortable
as that might be.

547
00:43:24,253 --> 00:43:26,473
[electronica playing]

548
00:44:23,922 --> 00:44:25,706
[camera shutter clicks]

549
00:44:25,750 --> 00:44:27,795
So in the mid-'90s,
I shaved my head,

550
00:44:27,839 --> 00:44:30,493
and after a long period
of sobriety,
I started drinking again.

551
00:44:32,931 --> 00:44:35,107
♪ It's hard to let you go!

552
00:44:35,150 --> 00:44:38,066
And I became a complete
rock-and-roll cliché.

553
00:44:38,110 --> 00:44:41,200
I was living on tour buses,
hanging out in the strip clubs,

554
00:44:41,243 --> 00:44:42,897
dating strippers.

555
00:44:42,941 --> 00:44:44,725
♪ It's hard to let you go!

556
00:44:44,769 --> 00:44:47,380
And I fully
foolishly stupidly embraced

557
00:44:47,423 --> 00:44:49,338
the complete rock-and-roll
degenerate lifestyle.

558
00:44:49,382 --> 00:44:52,559
Ah, yay, yah... drinking!

559
00:44:52,602 --> 00:44:56,041
Ah, yay. Raaaah!

560
00:44:56,084 --> 00:45:00,393
[mumbling] ...glug glug glug.

561
00:45:04,353 --> 00:45:06,181
I don't know,
it made sense to me at the time.

562
00:45:08,531 --> 00:45:11,491
Oh, Hi.
My name is Dr. Richard,

563
00:45:11,534 --> 00:45:14,886
and I'd like to talk
to you today about alcoholism.

564
00:45:14,929 --> 00:45:17,062
A lot of people,
many of you who are watching,

565
00:45:17,105 --> 00:45:19,891
might've had a few bad
experiences with drinking,

566
00:45:19,934 --> 00:45:23,329
you know, a few too many drinks
at the office Christmas party.

567
00:45:23,372 --> 00:45:26,724
Well, one of my worst
experiences, I was on a tour bus

568
00:45:26,767 --> 00:45:29,770
and we were driving
from London to Manchester,

569
00:45:29,814 --> 00:45:33,382
and I had 15 or 20 drinks
and took a whole bunch of drugs

570
00:45:33,426 --> 00:45:38,039
and ended up having, I guess,
a sexual encounter
with a few different people.

571
00:45:38,083 --> 00:45:39,737
And when I woke up
in the morning,

572
00:45:39,780 --> 00:45:44,219
I was sick and hung over
and alone and cold.

573
00:45:44,263 --> 00:45:47,092
And I had poop
all over my body.

574
00:45:47,135 --> 00:45:49,616
I was covered with poop,

575
00:45:49,659 --> 00:45:51,749
but I didn't know
whose poop it was.

576
00:45:51,792 --> 00:45:54,577
And to this day,
I don't know whose poop it was.

577
00:45:59,800 --> 00:46:02,150
[bell jingles]

578
00:46:02,194 --> 00:46:04,152
[crowd noises echoing]

579
00:46:04,196 --> 00:46:07,199
Things started to go wrong.

580
00:46:07,242 --> 00:46:09,418
I broke up with my girlfriend.

581
00:46:09,462 --> 00:46:11,203
I started hanging out
in strip clubs,

582
00:46:11,246 --> 00:46:14,206
and also I decided
to make a punk rock record.

583
00:46:14,249 --> 00:46:16,382
[singing indistinct punk lyrics]

584
00:46:32,398 --> 00:46:36,010
I'd put out the album
Animal Rights
and it had failed.

585
00:46:36,054 --> 00:46:37,838
MAN: No one wanted
to listen to it.

586
00:46:37,882 --> 00:46:41,581
He was considered to be
past it, a bit of a loser.

587
00:46:41,624 --> 00:46:44,758
They were just making fun of him
and he took it badly.

588
00:46:44,802 --> 00:46:46,194
He wanted to be liked.

589
00:46:46,238 --> 00:46:48,893
He wanted to be respected.

590
00:46:48,936 --> 00:46:52,200
MOBY: I was convinced it was
going to be my last record.

591
00:46:52,244 --> 00:46:54,202
That I'd move back
to Connecticut,

592
00:46:54,246 --> 00:46:56,422
and I thought I'd go be
a community school teacher.

593
00:46:56,465 --> 00:46:59,425
[punk song resumes]

594
00:47:23,275 --> 00:47:26,060
Then I learned
my Mom had cancer.

595
00:47:37,855 --> 00:47:39,639
And then she died.

596
00:47:39,682 --> 00:47:41,684
[somber guitar music playing]

597
00:47:47,690 --> 00:47:51,781
And I missed her funeral because
I was in bed drunk, passed out.

598
00:47:51,825 --> 00:47:54,697
[guitar continues
over muffled traffic noises]

599
00:48:25,598 --> 00:48:27,078
[distant thunder rumbling]

600
00:49:20,522 --> 00:49:22,960
I'm really, really sorry.

601
00:49:23,003 --> 00:49:25,875
[muffled announcements
echoing over loudspeaker]

602
00:49:35,363 --> 00:49:37,583
WOMAN: Oh, I think that's Moby.

603
00:49:39,759 --> 00:49:41,195
WOMAN 2: That's Moby.

604
00:49:48,811 --> 00:49:51,249
LYNCH: Well, I always
talk about ideas.

605
00:49:51,292 --> 00:49:56,776
And I always say we don't do
anything without first an idea.

606
00:49:56,819 --> 00:50:03,043
So ideas are precious things
and we all want ideas.

607
00:50:03,087 --> 00:50:05,393
There's trillions of ideas,
you know.

608
00:50:05,437 --> 00:50:09,006
They're thoughts in a way,
thoughts go through our heads.

609
00:50:09,049 --> 00:50:13,053
And... but I picture it
out in the ether.

610
00:50:13,097 --> 00:50:17,623
There's trillions and trillions
of fantastic ideas.

611
00:50:17,666 --> 00:50:21,540
And the deeper you can think,

612
00:50:21,583 --> 00:50:25,370
the bigger the ideas are
that you can catch.

613
00:50:25,413 --> 00:50:29,722
So, it's very important

614
00:50:29,765 --> 00:50:34,553
for any line of work
to catch ideas.

615
00:50:34,596 --> 00:50:38,035
And once in a while,
you catch an idea
that you fall in love with,

616
00:50:38,078 --> 00:50:42,691
and then the idea tells you
everything, pretty
much everything.

617
00:50:42,735 --> 00:50:45,694
So if it's like a musical idea,

618
00:50:45,738 --> 00:50:50,830
you catch something that gets
you going to the guitar
or the piano or whatever.

619
00:50:50,873 --> 00:50:53,789
And it fires you up.

620
00:50:53,833 --> 00:50:56,096
Ideas come with inspiration,

621
00:50:56,140 --> 00:51:01,928
a certain amount of information,
and off you go.

622
00:51:01,971 --> 00:51:04,235
[exotic sci-fi
sound effects playing]

623
00:51:06,454 --> 00:51:08,761
I had lost
my American record deal.

624
00:51:08,804 --> 00:51:12,069
My last album, Animal Rights,
had been a complete failure.

625
00:51:12,112 --> 00:51:15,202
My last tour had been a failure
that no one came to,

626
00:51:15,246 --> 00:51:17,857
and I was working
on this album Play,

627
00:51:17,900 --> 00:51:21,078
and I took the music
I was working on,
which was like "Porcelain"

628
00:51:21,121 --> 00:51:23,123
and "Why Does My Heart
Feel So Bad"
and "Natural Blues,"

629
00:51:23,167 --> 00:51:27,649
and I walked around this
neighborhood and it just
sounded terrible to me.

630
00:51:27,693 --> 00:51:30,696
[Moby playing "Honey"]

631
00:51:30,739 --> 00:51:33,438
♪ Get my honey come back

632
00:51:33,481 --> 00:51:34,874
♪ Get my honey come back

633
00:51:34,917 --> 00:51:39,444
And I stopped on this bench,

634
00:51:39,487 --> 00:51:41,707
convinced that my career
was over...

635
00:51:41,750 --> 00:51:43,970
♪ Get my honey come back

636
00:51:44,013 --> 00:51:46,886
...convinced I was working
on a record that no one
was ever going to hear...

637
00:51:46,929 --> 00:51:49,280
[wind whistling]

638
00:51:49,323 --> 00:51:53,849
...and pretty sure that I
was going to sell my apartment

639
00:51:53,893 --> 00:51:57,201
and move back to Connecticut
and have to get a real job.

640
00:51:59,551 --> 00:52:02,162
CONTROLLER:
Five... vehicle's armed...

641
00:52:02,206 --> 00:52:05,383
Three, two, one, fire!

642
00:52:09,996 --> 00:52:10,997
Thrust fired.

643
00:52:13,173 --> 00:52:14,740
[ethereal electronica playing]

644
00:52:35,282 --> 00:52:39,504
And I thought Play
was going to be a complete,
complete failure,

645
00:52:39,547 --> 00:52:41,723
you know because it was a weird,
badly mixed,

646
00:52:41,767 --> 00:52:44,204
badly produced record
that I made in my bedroom.

647
00:52:44,248 --> 00:52:47,120
Mainly involving vocals
from people who've been dead

648
00:52:47,164 --> 00:52:50,558
for 40 or 50 years,
but then things changed a lot.

649
00:52:50,602 --> 00:52:53,431
DAVID LETTERMAN: Our next guest
is a Grammy-nominated musician

650
00:52:53,474 --> 00:52:56,303
whose CD right here was named
one of the top albums
of the year

651
00:52:56,347 --> 00:52:57,957
by nearly every
major publication.

652
00:52:58,000 --> 00:53:00,351
If you don't have one of
these boys now, you ought to,

653
00:53:00,394 --> 00:53:04,311
seriously, tomorrow you ought
to call in sick and go get one.
It's called Play.

654
00:53:04,355 --> 00:53:06,444
Here's Moby.

655
00:53:08,185 --> 00:53:11,797
MOBY: It started off so small.

656
00:53:11,840 --> 00:53:16,193
I mean, when it started,
it was selling

657
00:53:16,236 --> 00:53:19,108
like 2,000 or 3,000 copies
a week, you know,

658
00:53:19,152 --> 00:53:22,111
barely doing anything... oops.

659
00:53:22,155 --> 00:53:24,766
And, uh...

660
00:53:24,810 --> 00:53:28,248
and then it
just kept selling more.

661
00:53:28,292 --> 00:53:31,120
CONAN: My next guest tonight is
acknowledged as one of the most
innovative figures

662
00:53:31,164 --> 00:53:33,210
in the world
of electronic dance music,

663
00:53:33,253 --> 00:53:37,257
and he's here to perform
a song from his most
recent album, Play.

664
00:53:37,301 --> 00:53:41,435
ERIC: Slowly but surely,
everybody who discovered
the music

665
00:53:41,479 --> 00:53:42,915
felt like there was
something special there.

666
00:53:42,958 --> 00:53:45,309
[relaxed electronica playing]

667
00:53:48,660 --> 00:53:53,839
♪ In my dreams I'm dying
all the time ♪

668
00:53:58,496 --> 00:54:04,284
♪ Then I wake
it's kaleidoscopic mind ♪

669
00:54:08,941 --> 00:54:12,423
♪ I never meant to hurt you

670
00:54:14,468 --> 00:54:17,689
♪ I never meant to lie

671
00:54:22,041 --> 00:54:25,262
♪ So this is goodbye

672
00:54:27,525 --> 00:54:30,136
♪ This is goodbye

673
00:54:30,179 --> 00:54:34,053
And it was so surprising
and every time it sold more,

674
00:54:34,096 --> 00:54:36,273
I thought,
"Great, now it's done."

675
00:54:38,536 --> 00:54:41,495
And then it started selling
10,000 copies a week,

676
00:54:41,539 --> 00:54:45,978
and then it started selling
100,000 copies a week.

677
00:54:46,021 --> 00:54:50,461
And then at one point it was
selling almost 200,000 copies
worldwide a week.

678
00:54:50,504 --> 00:54:53,333
And it went number one
in the UK and it went
number one in France

679
00:54:53,377 --> 00:54:55,117
and Australia and Germany.

680
00:54:55,161 --> 00:54:58,295
And suddenly, you know,

681
00:54:58,338 --> 00:55:02,081
I went from playing to
a couple hundred people a night

682
00:55:02,124 --> 00:55:04,736
to a couple thousand people
a night to...

683
00:55:04,779 --> 00:55:07,260
Oh wow, cricket bats.

684
00:55:07,304 --> 00:55:09,436
Do you need a cricket bat?

685
00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:11,046
Um...

686
00:55:11,090 --> 00:55:12,309
Do I need a cricket bat?

687
00:55:14,441 --> 00:55:17,444
ERIC: So different tracks
in different countries

688
00:55:17,488 --> 00:55:20,055
sort of brought
this album forward.

689
00:55:20,099 --> 00:55:23,537
And at that point I just looked
at Moby and said,

690
00:55:23,581 --> 00:55:27,280
"Who the fuck are these people?
How does this even happen?"

691
00:55:27,324 --> 00:55:29,500
MOBY: It was like magic.

692
00:55:29,543 --> 00:55:34,069
♪ Here we are now
going to the East Side ♪

693
00:55:34,113 --> 00:55:39,510
♪ I pick up my friends
and we start to ride ♪

694
00:55:39,553 --> 00:55:43,905
♪ Ride all night,
yeah, we ride all day ♪

695
00:55:43,949 --> 00:55:48,954
♪ Some may come
and some may stay... ♪

696
00:55:48,997 --> 00:55:51,522
[muffled music playing]

697
00:55:51,565 --> 00:55:54,481
- MOBY: Hello?
- DAVID BOWIE: Hi, guy.
How are you doing?

698
00:55:54,525 --> 00:55:56,527
- Hello?
- Hiya.

699
00:55:56,570 --> 00:55:57,832
Hi, David.

700
00:55:59,094 --> 00:56:00,879
Yeah, I know this voice.

701
00:56:00,922 --> 00:56:03,142
Um...

702
00:56:03,185 --> 00:56:05,405
Go on, keep talking, will ya?

703
00:56:05,449 --> 00:56:08,365
- Hello?
- Hello. You sound
incredibly tall.

704
00:56:08,408 --> 00:56:10,932
Am I right?
Are you a tall person?

705
00:56:10,976 --> 00:56:14,196
I can't, unfortunately
I can't hear you very well.

706
00:56:14,240 --> 00:56:16,155
You're a tall person
with really long hair, yeah?

707
00:56:16,198 --> 00:56:18,200
I'm a tall person
with really long hair.

708
00:56:18,244 --> 00:56:20,986
- I weigh about 300 pounds.
- Yeah, it's Moby, isn't it?

709
00:56:21,029 --> 00:56:23,554
One of the sexiest men...

710
00:56:23,597 --> 00:56:27,340
[cheering and applause]

711
00:56:30,387 --> 00:56:33,390
MOBY: David Bowie
was my favorite musician
of all time.

712
00:56:33,433 --> 00:56:35,522
- [camera shutter clicks]
- Maybe 2000, 2001...

713
00:56:35,566 --> 00:56:38,786
He moved across the street to me
and I couldn't believe it.

714
00:56:38,830 --> 00:56:41,223
Like I became friends
with David Bowie.

715
00:56:41,267 --> 00:56:43,835
Some of the moments that
he and I had together,

716
00:56:43,878 --> 00:56:45,967
I almost feel like
there was maybe like

717
00:56:46,011 --> 00:56:50,450
a quasi older brother quality
to his friendship with me.

718
00:56:50,494 --> 00:56:53,584
And we had barbecues together.
We went to the deli together.

719
00:56:53,627 --> 00:56:55,934
We got tea together and we
worked on music together,

720
00:56:55,977 --> 00:56:59,198
and we had holidays together
and dinners together.

721
00:56:59,241 --> 00:57:00,808
And we got to go
on tour together.

722
00:57:00,852 --> 00:57:02,810
David Bowie and Moby!

723
00:57:04,986 --> 00:57:07,075
[band playing]

724
00:57:13,255 --> 00:57:16,824
♪ Sitting here wishing
on a cement floor ♪

725
00:57:16,868 --> 00:57:21,612
♪ Just wishing that I had
just something you wore ♪

726
00:57:23,875 --> 00:57:27,487
♪ I put it on
when I grow lonely ♪

727
00:57:27,531 --> 00:57:31,839
♪ Won't you take off your dress
and send it to me? ♪

728
00:57:35,060 --> 00:57:39,107
♪ I miss your kiss
and then I miss your head ♪

729
00:57:39,151 --> 00:57:43,242
♪ And a letter in your writing
doesn't mean you're not dead ♪

730
00:57:45,853 --> 00:57:49,770
♪ Just run outside
in the desert heat ♪

731
00:57:49,814 --> 00:57:54,296
♪ Make your dress all wet
then send it to me ♪

732
00:57:56,081 --> 00:58:00,607
Here I was, this panicking,
alcoholic, bald musician

733
00:58:00,651 --> 00:58:03,349
who thought his career was over.

734
00:58:03,392 --> 00:58:05,699
And then all of a sudden
my career wasn't just over,

735
00:58:05,743 --> 00:58:07,788
but it had become
like actual rock stardom.

736
00:58:07,832 --> 00:58:09,877
♪ And I miss your breath

737
00:58:09,921 --> 00:58:12,880
♪ And a little bit of writing
doesn't mean you're dead ♪

738
00:58:12,924 --> 00:58:15,404
I'd walk down the street
and people knew who I was,

739
00:58:15,448 --> 00:58:19,234
and I would go to parties
and women I'd never met
would flirt with me

740
00:58:19,278 --> 00:58:25,327
and then headlining
my own festival, you know,
with New Order and Outkast

741
00:58:25,371 --> 00:58:27,547
and these big bands
opening up for me.

742
00:58:27,591 --> 00:58:31,333
ERIC: I mean
an album like Play
transcends the music industry

743
00:58:31,377 --> 00:58:34,728
because it became
a mainstream phenomenon.

744
00:58:34,772 --> 00:58:39,603
MOBY: It ultimately completely
corrupted and ruined me,

745
00:58:39,646 --> 00:58:42,519
but at the time
it was so much fun

746
00:58:42,562 --> 00:58:45,783
to go from being
kind of a washed-up has-been

747
00:58:45,826 --> 00:58:49,221
to dating movie stars
and going to these parties
and making a lot of money

748
00:58:49,264 --> 00:58:52,006
and touring and playing in front
of tens of thousands of people.

749
00:58:52,050 --> 00:58:57,142
Like maybe I should pretend
it wasn't great, but for
a minute it was really great.

750
00:58:57,185 --> 00:58:59,274
And it was mind boggling.

751
00:58:59,318 --> 00:59:02,277
And every day I drank more.

752
00:59:02,321 --> 00:59:05,933
I started doing
a lot of drugs, and...

753
00:59:08,153 --> 00:59:12,549
it was amazing,
but terrible at the same time.

754
00:59:12,592 --> 00:59:17,292
I mean like my narcissism,
my entitlement,
just were really out of control.

755
00:59:19,599 --> 00:59:22,123
Yeah. Um...

756
00:59:22,167 --> 00:59:24,125
Do you want me
to pick you up anything here?

757
00:59:24,169 --> 00:59:26,432
Yeah. It's an Indian grocery.

758
00:59:30,436 --> 00:59:32,220
[ethereal ambience playing]

759
01:00:10,432 --> 01:00:13,261
Hi. So we're here
talking to Moby,

760
01:00:13,305 --> 01:00:18,658
and, uh, I want to ask him
some questions about fame.

761
01:00:18,702 --> 01:00:23,402
So, Moby, what are your thoughts
about the world of fame?

762
01:00:23,445 --> 01:00:26,013
How did you buy into fame?

763
01:00:26,057 --> 01:00:29,756
And why would you think it was
so important to you?

764
01:00:29,800 --> 01:00:31,671
It's confusing to me.

765
01:00:31,715 --> 01:00:35,066
I think that you're not
a stupid person.

766
01:00:35,109 --> 01:00:38,765
So why do you think you bought
into the cold culture of fame?

767
01:00:38,809 --> 01:00:43,422
I think I just saw it as a way
of, I dunno, very simply
it made me feel better.

768
01:00:43,465 --> 01:00:48,470
It made me feel like I had
legitimacy, and meaning,
that my life had worth.

769
01:00:48,514 --> 01:00:53,258
So you keep saying that, not
having worth and legitimacy,
and how do you feel now?

770
01:00:53,301 --> 01:00:56,087
I mean, how do you think
you got out of that pattern?

771
01:00:56,130 --> 01:00:59,351
How do you measure yourself?
Playwas your
biggest hit, right?

772
01:00:59,394 --> 01:01:01,396
- MOBY: Mm-hmm.
- You've never topped that
since.

773
01:01:01,440 --> 01:01:03,616
- No.
- Why?

774
01:01:03,660 --> 01:01:06,314
Uh...
That's a good question.

775
01:01:06,358 --> 01:01:08,795
You keep saying that,
that's what I'm here to do.

776
01:01:08,839 --> 01:01:10,144
- Yeah.
- [falsetto characters warbling]

777
01:01:10,188 --> 01:01:12,843
And I'm, I don't know.

778
01:01:12,886 --> 01:01:16,411
Like I desperately wanted them
to be as successful as Play

779
01:01:16,455 --> 01:01:19,240
and it would make me sad
that each record was
sort of like

780
01:01:19,284 --> 01:01:21,373
successively less successful...

781
01:01:21,416 --> 01:01:22,330
- [falsetto character warbles]
- And...

782
01:01:22,374 --> 01:01:24,463
Do you analyze it?

783
01:01:24,506 --> 01:01:29,381
We've talked about this,
when Playbecame
successful, I loved it.

784
01:01:29,424 --> 01:01:32,340
I pretended
I didn't really care.

785
01:01:32,384 --> 01:01:36,431
I tried really hard
to pretend when I talked
to journalists or people

786
01:01:36,475 --> 01:01:40,087
that fame didn't matter to me,
but I loved it.

787
01:01:43,874 --> 01:01:46,441
Were you anxious?
Depressed?

788
01:01:46,485 --> 01:01:47,921
What were you going through?

789
01:01:47,965 --> 01:01:51,011
I was angry.
I was like an addict, you know.

790
01:01:51,055 --> 01:01:55,712
Like a baby who was being weaned
from his mother's breast.

791
01:01:55,755 --> 01:01:59,933
Like an addict who like,
the crack pipe
was being taken away from me.

792
01:01:59,977 --> 01:02:03,371
And I was angry,
and I was scared, and I was sad,

793
01:02:03,415 --> 01:02:08,855
and I just wanted anything
that would bring
the fame back to me.

794
01:02:10,770 --> 01:02:12,467
As your therapist,

795
01:02:12,511 --> 01:02:15,862
it's my professional
and personal opinion

796
01:02:15,906 --> 01:02:19,126
that you are a sad
and broken human being.

797
01:02:21,128 --> 01:02:23,609
I mean, you know what I'm
talking about, right?

798
01:02:25,742 --> 01:02:27,744
♪ Ooh-ooh

799
01:02:30,921 --> 01:02:34,402
♪ Beneath the sorrow tree

800
01:02:37,101 --> 01:02:39,799
♪ Ooh-ooh

801
01:02:42,497 --> 01:02:46,719
♪ Beneath the sorrow tree

802
01:02:48,547 --> 01:02:51,680
♪ Ooh-ooh

803
01:02:53,857 --> 01:02:57,948
♪ Beneath the sorrow tree

804
01:02:59,471 --> 01:03:03,127
♪ Ooh-ooh

805
01:03:03,170 --> 01:03:07,435
[cheering and applause]

806
01:03:07,479 --> 01:03:11,439
[discordant
ambient music playing]

807
01:03:11,483 --> 01:03:15,182
♪ Beneath the sorrow tree

808
01:03:15,226 --> 01:03:18,142
[discordant electronica echoing]

809
01:03:32,243 --> 01:03:35,768
[electronica growing louder]

810
01:03:35,812 --> 01:03:38,553
[electronica buzzing,
clattering]

811
01:03:47,258 --> 01:03:50,000
[somber orchestral chords
over clattering]

812
01:04:03,622 --> 01:04:05,189
Oh, hey.

813
01:04:06,494 --> 01:04:08,845
I didn't expect
to see you down here.

814
01:04:12,065 --> 01:04:14,111
Wow, I haven't seen you
in a while.

815
01:04:14,154 --> 01:04:15,721
Ha.

816
01:04:15,764 --> 01:04:19,638
I never really understood
what you were.

817
01:04:19,681 --> 01:04:24,425
You're an alien,
but are you an alien bug?

818
01:04:24,469 --> 01:04:26,558
'Cause you have antenna.

819
01:04:26,601 --> 01:04:29,561
You're sort of a self-portrait.

820
01:04:29,604 --> 01:04:32,259
You're bald except for antenna.

821
01:04:32,303 --> 01:04:34,131
I'm bald.

822
01:04:34,174 --> 01:04:37,874
You come from another planet.
I come from another planet.

823
01:04:37,917 --> 01:04:40,354
- [chimes jingling]
- Do you want to
go for one more,

824
01:04:40,398 --> 01:04:42,487
do you want to go for a ride?

825
01:04:42,530 --> 01:04:45,098
Is your, your ship is here?

826
01:04:47,492 --> 01:04:51,061
Okay. Let's go for one,
you want to?
Yeah, let's go.

827
01:04:51,104 --> 01:04:56,109
The status quo wasn't going
to last, I didn't want
to admit that to myself.

828
01:04:56,153 --> 01:04:58,155
And then I started getting
really bad reviews.

829
01:04:58,198 --> 01:05:00,679
Like I remember
The New York Timesgave
one of my records a review

830
01:05:00,722 --> 01:05:03,073
where they said it was so bad,
it represented the end of music.

831
01:05:03,116 --> 01:05:05,771
- Really?
- Yeah. It was on the homepage
of The New York Times

832
01:05:05,814 --> 01:05:07,599
- for a week.
- The end of music.

833
01:05:07,642 --> 01:05:09,731
And there were people
writing in comments about

834
01:05:09,775 --> 01:05:12,734
not just that they didn't
like me, but they wanted
to stab me to death.

835
01:05:12,778 --> 01:05:14,954
They wanted to kick me
to death on the street.

836
01:05:14,998 --> 01:05:17,957
- They wanted to hang me.
- Where is this?

837
01:05:18,001 --> 01:05:20,699
Just like where people like
write crazy ass stuff.

838
01:05:20,742 --> 01:05:23,876
And it was, it really started
to freak me out.

839
01:05:23,920 --> 01:05:26,357
'Cause I was like,
oh, this is the media.

840
01:05:26,400 --> 01:05:28,315
- Right.
- This is the thing that I love.

841
01:05:28,359 --> 01:05:31,101
This is the thing that I need
to feel good about myself.

842
01:05:31,144 --> 01:05:35,148
And not only are they paying
less attention to me,

843
01:05:35,192 --> 01:05:40,414
but the attention they're paying
to me is so hurtful.

844
01:05:40,458 --> 01:05:41,850
- Right.
- You know?

845
01:05:41,894 --> 01:05:45,680
And so, and it...
it really was disconcerting.

846
01:05:47,987 --> 01:05:49,989
- WOMAN: You suck!
- [crowd booing]

847
01:05:50,033 --> 01:05:52,296
Nobody listens to techno!

848
01:05:52,339 --> 01:05:56,082
Nobody listens to techno!

849
01:05:56,126 --> 01:05:59,085
Nobody listens to techno!

850
01:05:59,129 --> 01:06:01,958
You suck!

851
01:06:02,001 --> 01:06:05,004
MAN: [drunkenly] You suuuuck!

852
01:06:05,048 --> 01:06:06,701
[distorted booing]

853
01:06:06,745 --> 01:06:08,486
You suuuuck!

854
01:06:08,529 --> 01:06:10,270
[booing continues]

855
01:06:10,314 --> 01:06:15,362
[slowing down, echoing]
Nobody listens to techno!

856
01:06:17,147 --> 01:06:21,020
I was in Barcelona
for the MTV Music Awards,

857
01:06:21,064 --> 01:06:24,632
and I'd been told beforehand
that I was going to be winning
an MTV Music Award.

858
01:06:24,676 --> 01:06:27,157
And it was going to be
my third or fourth

859
01:06:27,200 --> 01:06:30,160
or fifth MTV Music Award
that I was winning.

860
01:06:30,203 --> 01:06:34,816
And I got to my hotel
in Barcelona the night before
the MTV Music Awards.

861
01:06:34,860 --> 01:06:41,171
And I was at the top of one
of the most elegant hotels
I've ever been to.

862
01:06:41,214 --> 01:06:43,086
It's called the Arts Hotel.

863
01:06:43,129 --> 01:06:47,742
And there were four huge
apartments at the top
of this hotel,

864
01:06:47,786 --> 01:06:51,833
and my neighbors were P. Diddy,
Bon Jovi, and Madonna.

865
01:06:51,877 --> 01:06:54,053
So the four of us
were sharing this floor.

866
01:06:54,097 --> 01:06:56,186
It's overlooking Barcelona
and the Mediterranean.

867
01:07:02,235 --> 01:07:07,588
And that night I ended up
getting very drunk...

868
01:07:07,632 --> 01:07:12,680
and everything was perfect.

869
01:07:12,724 --> 01:07:16,989
You know,
everything I'd ever wanted had
been given to me, even more so.

870
01:07:17,033 --> 01:07:19,252
You know, like I just wanted
to make a few obscure records

871
01:07:19,296 --> 01:07:24,605
and all of a sudden, like I'm
at the top of this crazy hotel

872
01:07:24,649 --> 01:07:27,869
and I've sold 10
or 20 million records.

873
01:07:27,913 --> 01:07:34,224
And everything had been given
to me that I'd ever wanted
times a million.

874
01:07:34,267 --> 01:07:37,444
And I was so despondent.

875
01:07:37,488 --> 01:07:42,188
How strange it was that
I've been given everything

876
01:07:42,232 --> 01:07:44,886
and I'd never been more
depressed.

877
01:07:47,367 --> 01:07:51,110
And one of the only things
that kept me from killing myself
was the fact

878
01:07:51,154 --> 01:07:54,722
that the windows in the hotel
didn't open wide enough.

879
01:08:00,250 --> 01:08:02,426
And I was even annoyed at that.

880
01:08:02,469 --> 01:08:06,473
I was like, wow,
I can't even kill myself.

881
01:08:06,517 --> 01:08:10,434
Even that somehow is denied me.

882
01:08:10,477 --> 01:08:12,914
It was such an odd moment

883
01:08:12,958 --> 01:08:17,528
to be at what was ostensibly
the pinnacle of my career

884
01:08:17,571 --> 01:08:19,834
and the pinnacle of my life

885
01:08:19,878 --> 01:08:22,488
and to have never been
more depressed.

886
01:08:24,143 --> 01:08:26,450
[choral music echoing
in background]

887
01:08:44,032 --> 01:08:47,166
I went back to New York,
and I just started
drinking more,

888
01:08:47,210 --> 01:08:49,299
and I started doing cocaine.

889
01:08:49,342 --> 01:08:52,040
I'd always avoided cocaine
because of all the drugs,

890
01:08:52,084 --> 01:08:53,912
that was the one
that scared me the most.

891
01:08:53,955 --> 01:08:55,914
So I was having 15 drinks
a night,

892
01:08:55,957 --> 01:08:59,047
a couple hundred dollars' worth
of cocaine every night,

893
01:08:59,091 --> 01:09:01,310
and then every morning
at like 7:00,

894
01:09:01,353 --> 01:09:04,183
I would try to go to sleep
and I would take Xanax

895
01:09:04,227 --> 01:09:10,494
and Vicodin and I would wake up
so disappointed

896
01:09:10,537 --> 01:09:12,322
that I was still alive.

897
01:09:12,365 --> 01:09:15,889
And it got to the point where
when I went to sleep,

898
01:09:15,934 --> 01:09:18,327
all I wanted
was to never wake up.

899
01:09:18,371 --> 01:09:22,680
But somehow, and maybe I'm like
part cockroach or part rat,

900
01:09:22,723 --> 01:09:25,987
I just kept waking up, you know,
at 4 or 5 in the afternoon

901
01:09:26,031 --> 01:09:28,728
so disappointed
I was still alive.

902
01:09:28,773 --> 01:09:31,602
And I was physically,
I was starting to turn gray,

903
01:09:31,645 --> 01:09:36,476
and I was all puffy,
and I had this like
alcoholic bloatedness.

904
01:09:36,520 --> 01:09:38,348
There were complete strangers
in my apartment.

905
01:09:38,390 --> 01:09:41,219
People were smoking
crystal meth in my bathroom.

906
01:09:41,264 --> 01:09:43,527
There are people I'd never met
having sex in my bed.

907
01:09:43,569 --> 01:09:48,401
Finally in 2008, I think
I just bottomed out,

908
01:09:48,444 --> 01:09:54,190
you know, in every way,
like physically,
emotionally, spiritually.

909
01:09:54,233 --> 01:10:00,065
Yeah. And then 2008,
October, 2008, I finally
stopped drinking.

910
01:10:00,108 --> 01:10:02,719
[muffled music pounding,
liquid burbling]

911
01:10:07,594 --> 01:10:10,902
♪ I would stand
in line for this ♪

912
01:10:12,817 --> 01:10:16,212
♪ There's always room
in life for this ♪

913
01:10:18,388 --> 01:10:22,957
♪ Oh babe, oh babe

914
01:10:23,001 --> 01:10:25,786
♪ Then it fell apart

915
01:10:25,830 --> 01:10:29,007
♪ It fell apart

916
01:10:29,050 --> 01:10:31,531
♪ Oh babe

917
01:10:31,575 --> 01:10:33,577
♪ Oh babe

918
01:10:33,620 --> 01:10:36,449
♪ Then it fell apart

919
01:10:36,493 --> 01:10:39,626
♪ It fell apart

920
01:10:39,670 --> 01:10:42,063
♪ I had to close down
everything ♪

921
01:10:42,107 --> 01:10:44,240
♪ I had to
close down my mind ♪

922
01:10:44,282 --> 01:10:47,155
♪ Too many things
could cut me ♪

923
01:10:47,199 --> 01:10:49,809
♪ Too much can
make me blind ♪

924
01:10:49,853 --> 01:10:52,422
♪ I've seen so much
in so many places ♪

925
01:10:52,465 --> 01:10:55,120
♪ So many heartaches,
so many faces ♪

926
01:10:55,163 --> 01:10:57,383
♪ So many dirty things

927
01:10:57,427 --> 01:11:00,473
♪ You couldn't even believe

928
01:11:00,517 --> 01:11:05,261
♪ I would stand
in line for this ♪

929
01:11:05,304 --> 01:11:08,438
♪ There's always room
in life for this ♪

930
01:11:12,355 --> 01:11:14,618
♪ What you say my name was?

931
01:11:14,661 --> 01:11:15,662
♪ Say it

932
01:11:17,273 --> 01:11:20,362
♪ What you say my name was?

933
01:11:20,406 --> 01:11:22,407
♪ Ah, say it when

934
01:11:22,452 --> 01:11:25,281
♪ I know I can

935
01:11:25,324 --> 01:11:27,239
♪ But I know I can

936
01:11:27,282 --> 01:11:32,026
♪ Well, I know
I can't find no... ♪

937
01:11:32,070 --> 01:11:33,853
♪ Oh babe

938
01:11:33,898 --> 01:11:36,030
♪ Oh babe

939
01:11:36,074 --> 01:11:39,120
♪ Then it fell apart

940
01:11:39,164 --> 01:11:40,948
♪ It fell apart

941
01:11:42,210 --> 01:11:44,343
♪ Oh babe

942
01:11:44,387 --> 01:11:46,650
♪ Oh babe

943
01:11:46,693 --> 01:11:49,348
♪ Then it fell apart

944
01:11:49,392 --> 01:11:52,046
♪ It fell apart

945
01:11:52,090 --> 01:11:55,049
♪ Oh babe

946
01:11:55,093 --> 01:11:57,574
♪ Oh babe

947
01:11:57,617 --> 01:12:00,272
♪ Then it fell apart

948
01:12:00,316 --> 01:12:02,709
♪ It fell apart

949
01:12:02,753 --> 01:12:05,451
♪ Oh babe

950
01:12:05,495 --> 01:12:07,366
♪ Oh babe

951
01:12:07,410 --> 01:12:09,803
♪ Like it always does

952
01:12:09,847 --> 01:12:13,719
♪ Always does

953
01:12:20,335 --> 01:12:27,386
[cheering and applause]

954
01:12:27,430 --> 01:12:29,562
In the crack neighborhood
in Stamford, I was happier.

955
01:12:29,606 --> 01:12:32,130
Making $3,000 a year,
I was happier.

956
01:12:32,173 --> 01:12:34,741
Paying $50 a month
so I could squat,

957
01:12:34,785 --> 01:12:37,744
I was happier than when I was
living overlooking Central Park.

958
01:12:37,788 --> 01:12:40,138
Felt like such a confused...

959
01:12:40,181 --> 01:12:43,880
'cause I had thought
that living in this perfect home
was going to fix everything.

960
01:12:43,924 --> 01:12:48,451
Like, how couldn't it?
When I found the perfect home,
I would be perfectly happy.

961
01:12:48,494 --> 01:12:53,369
When you set your sights,
you know you spend your entire
life working towards something

962
01:12:53,412 --> 01:12:55,240
and you achieve it
and you're less happy

963
01:12:55,282 --> 01:12:58,416
than before you even started
working to achieve it,

964
01:12:58,460 --> 01:13:00,724
you don't know what else to do.

965
01:13:00,767 --> 01:13:02,726
- [horn beeps]
- [animals squawking]

966
01:13:02,769 --> 01:13:06,860
Give up the familiar,
even if it's killing you,

967
01:13:06,904 --> 01:13:10,124
and you have to figure out
then what works.

968
01:14:01,088 --> 01:14:02,438
[cow moos]

969
01:14:06,485 --> 01:14:08,618
90% of rainforest deforestation,

970
01:14:08,661 --> 01:14:11,184
probably 75% of erectile
dysfunction...

971
01:14:11,228 --> 01:14:13,318
[audience laughing]

972
01:14:13,361 --> 01:14:15,494
40% of California's water use,

973
01:14:15,538 --> 01:14:18,148
50% of cancer, diabetes,
heart disease,

974
01:14:18,192 --> 01:14:20,237
close to 100% of famine,

975
01:14:20,281 --> 01:14:22,501
'cause all the food that they're
feeding the cows, et cetera,

976
01:14:22,545 --> 01:14:23,633
could be fed to people.

977
01:14:23,675 --> 01:14:25,852
50% of ocean acidification.

978
01:14:25,896 --> 01:14:29,639
So in one fell swoop,
you address all these
environmental issues

979
01:14:29,682 --> 01:14:32,990
just by stopping subsidizing
animal agriculture.

980
01:14:33,032 --> 01:14:34,687
That's my quick spiel.

981
01:14:34,731 --> 01:14:37,516
[crowd murmuring]

982
01:14:42,521 --> 01:14:46,046
I think people should speak up
about what they believe in.

983
01:14:46,090 --> 01:14:47,874
So, Moby, more power to him,
you know.

984
01:14:47,918 --> 01:14:51,530
What he's speaking about
all the time is,
are positive things.

985
01:14:51,574 --> 01:14:55,882
And... but he's known for,
you know, great music.

986
01:14:55,925 --> 01:15:00,931
And I think Moby really does,
you know, love, you know,
what he does

987
01:15:00,974 --> 01:15:02,933
and more power to him.

988
01:15:02,976 --> 01:15:04,543
Just keep on making
that great music, Mo.

989
01:15:04,587 --> 01:15:07,327
Just as an aside, not to take up
too much time,

990
01:15:07,371 --> 01:15:09,505
but like, have you
looked around recently?

991
01:15:09,548 --> 01:15:12,072
This is real.

992
01:15:12,116 --> 01:15:14,945
- Like, you know?
- [applause]

993
01:15:14,987 --> 01:15:16,555
I mean,
you look at the space,

994
01:15:16,599 --> 01:15:19,079
and you look at the people,
this is real.

995
01:15:19,123 --> 01:15:21,168
Like I've been a vegan
for 30 years.

996
01:15:21,212 --> 01:15:24,041
30 years ago,
this didn't exist.

997
01:15:24,084 --> 01:15:25,651
[applause]

998
01:15:25,695 --> 01:15:27,305
So let's just take a moment.

999
01:15:27,348 --> 01:15:30,134
I mean,
we have a long way to go,

1000
01:15:30,177 --> 01:15:31,657
but boy, we've come so far.

1001
01:15:31,701 --> 01:15:33,790
[applause]

1002
01:15:33,833 --> 01:15:38,098
Moby and I are super excited
to present this evening's
incredible news.

1003
01:15:38,142 --> 01:15:41,014
In just a few weeks,
we will be launching

1004
01:15:41,058 --> 01:15:45,584
the world's first ever
vegan music festival
right here in Los Angeles.

1005
01:15:45,628 --> 01:15:47,151
[cheering]

1006
01:15:52,983 --> 01:15:56,813
[indistinct introduction,
crowd cheering]

1007
01:15:59,380 --> 01:16:03,297
First off just once again,
thank you to everyone.

1008
01:16:03,341 --> 01:16:05,343
- And...
- [applause]

1009
01:16:05,386 --> 01:16:08,128
...one last thing before
we play this song.

1010
01:16:08,172 --> 01:16:10,478
Maybe this is
smug of me to say this,

1011
01:16:10,522 --> 01:16:12,437
but we're on the right side
of history.

1012
01:16:12,480 --> 01:16:14,918
- Whoo!
- [cheering and applause]

1013
01:16:14,960 --> 01:16:17,746
It was just a given
that at some point

1014
01:16:17,790 --> 01:16:21,794
people will look
at animal agriculture
in the past

1015
01:16:21,838 --> 01:16:24,014
the way we now look at slavery,

1016
01:16:24,057 --> 01:16:26,843
or the way that we look
at like women not being
allowed to vote,

1017
01:16:26,886 --> 01:16:31,237
or the way we look
at African-Americans
and Caucasians

1018
01:16:31,282 --> 01:16:33,240
not being allowed
to use the same drinking
fountain.

1019
01:16:33,284 --> 01:16:37,809
Like as
Martin Luther King Jr. said,
and we often paraphrase,

1020
01:16:37,853 --> 01:16:41,379
the moral arc of the universe
is long and it bends
towards justice.

1021
01:16:41,422 --> 01:16:44,556
It also bends towards
the pragmatic reason.

1022
01:16:44,600 --> 01:16:48,778
And there's so many reasons
to consider veganism.

1023
01:16:48,821 --> 01:16:53,085
Like using animals for food is
the dumbest, cruelest thing

1024
01:16:53,130 --> 01:16:56,002
that we have ever done
collectively as a species.

1025
01:16:56,046 --> 01:16:58,091
- [cheering and applause]
- And to that end,

1026
01:16:58,135 --> 01:16:59,876
I know it's going to stop,

1027
01:16:59,919 --> 01:17:03,270
especially because everybody
here and people around the world

1028
01:17:03,314 --> 01:17:05,098
are working so hard on it.

1029
01:17:05,142 --> 01:17:08,014
So I would like to dedicate
this song to all the ravers

1030
01:17:08,058 --> 01:17:11,191
and all the animal rights
activists, and everyone.

1031
01:17:11,235 --> 01:17:12,192
Thanks.

1032
01:17:12,236 --> 01:17:14,934
[electronica playing]

1033
01:17:23,508 --> 01:17:27,599
♪ I'm feeling so real

1034
01:17:27,643 --> 01:17:29,645
♪ Love that you feel it now

1035
01:17:29,688 --> 01:17:33,823
♪ I'm feeling so real

1036
01:17:33,866 --> 01:17:35,607
♪ Love that you feel it

1037
01:17:35,651 --> 01:17:39,655
♪ I'm feeling so real

1038
01:17:41,744 --> 01:17:45,269
♪ I'm...
[voice electronically
distorted]

1039
01:18:02,503 --> 01:18:06,333
♪ I'm feeling so real

1040
01:18:06,377 --> 01:18:08,379
♪ Love that you feel now

1041
01:18:08,422 --> 01:18:12,165
♪ I'm feeling so real

1042
01:18:12,209 --> 01:18:14,124
♪ Love that we're
feeling now! ♪

1043
01:18:14,166 --> 01:18:18,344
♪ I'm feeling so real

1044
01:18:18,389 --> 01:18:20,085
♪ Love that you feel now

1045
01:18:20,130 --> 01:18:24,568
♪ I'm feeling so real

1046
01:18:24,612 --> 01:18:26,832
♪ Love that you feel now

1047
01:18:26,876 --> 01:18:29,879
[crowd whistling and applauding]

1048
01:18:29,922 --> 01:18:33,360
Thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you...

1049
01:18:56,469 --> 01:18:58,342
[thunder crashing]

1050
01:19:01,824 --> 01:19:03,608
[wind whistling]

1051
01:19:11,007 --> 01:19:15,968
As I've gotten older,
the world of people just
doesn't interest me as much.

1052
01:19:23,846 --> 01:19:25,630
[eagle screeching]

1053
01:19:28,851 --> 01:19:32,593
Nothing that humans make
ever compares

1054
01:19:33,943 --> 01:19:35,727
to what I can find in nature.

1055
01:19:37,380 --> 01:19:39,339
There are no signs.

1056
01:19:39,383 --> 01:19:41,341
There's no advertisements.

1057
01:19:41,385 --> 01:19:47,608
There's this wonderful,
still indifference to us.

1058
01:19:50,394 --> 01:19:55,050
As humans, we love feeling
a sense of significance

1059
01:19:55,094 --> 01:19:58,402
and we spend our whole lives
pursuing significance

1060
01:19:58,445 --> 01:20:03,710
and trying
to maintain the fiction
that we have great significance,

1061
01:20:03,755 --> 01:20:07,280
but there's something really
refreshing and nice

1062
01:20:07,324 --> 01:20:10,806
about giving up
any sense of significance

1063
01:20:10,849 --> 01:20:15,505
and just remembering our place
in the order of things.

1064
01:20:17,987 --> 01:20:20,859
And even though I'm still crazy,

1065
01:20:20,903 --> 01:20:24,166
I think I've hopefully
figured out

1066
01:20:24,210 --> 01:20:27,213
how to avoid looking
for like big, giant things

1067
01:20:27,257 --> 01:20:31,434
to fix more like small
internal problems, but...

1068
01:20:34,003 --> 01:20:36,222
Where am, where am I?

1069
01:20:39,050 --> 01:20:41,053
[geese honking]

1070
01:20:53,805 --> 01:20:56,025
[techno chords playing,
liquid burbling]

1071
01:21:06,121 --> 01:21:07,775
[static buzzing]

1072
01:21:10,735 --> 01:21:12,476
[somber orchestral chords
playing]

1073
01:21:31,582 --> 01:21:33,889
[piano playing somber arpeggios]

1074
01:21:56,999 --> 01:21:59,088
[techno chords playing]

1075
01:22:08,575 --> 01:22:10,925
[fireworks whistling, popping]

1076
01:22:14,233 --> 01:22:17,280
[electronica buzzing]

1077
01:22:17,323 --> 01:22:19,543
[percussion pounding]

1078
01:24:04,865 --> 01:24:06,650
[wind whistling]

1079
01:24:15,050 --> 01:24:17,052
[birds squawking, singing]

1080
01:24:22,840 --> 01:24:24,581
[bees droning]

1081
01:24:24,624 --> 01:24:26,757
[crows cawing]

1082
01:24:29,585 --> 01:24:32,719
[background rumbling,
growing louder]

1083
01:24:38,160 --> 01:24:41,032
[ominous echoes droning]

1084
01:24:41,076 --> 01:24:42,947
[exotic birds trilling]

1085
01:24:46,168 --> 01:24:48,692
[rumbling growing louder]

1086
01:25:30,734 --> 01:25:32,083
- [ambient music stops]
- MOBY: Hey, Hey.

1087
01:25:32,127 --> 01:25:33,867
Hey. Hey.

1088
01:25:33,911 --> 01:25:35,869
Death. Hey!

1089
01:25:35,913 --> 01:25:38,002
[footsteps crunching ground]

1090
01:25:38,045 --> 01:25:39,308
Hey.

1091
01:25:43,486 --> 01:25:44,748
Hey.

1092
01:25:45,879 --> 01:25:47,272
Whoa.

1093
01:25:47,316 --> 01:25:48,665
[clears throat]

1094
01:25:48,708 --> 01:25:50,188
Hey, Death.

1095
01:25:55,802 --> 01:25:57,543
Ugh!

1096
01:25:57,587 --> 01:25:58,978
Hey, Death.

1097
01:26:01,025 --> 01:26:03,288
Hey.

1098
01:26:03,332 --> 01:26:05,160
What are you doing out here?

1099
01:26:06,639 --> 01:26:10,469
[static feedback squealing]

1100
01:26:10,513 --> 01:26:12,297
No.

1101
01:26:12,341 --> 01:26:14,778
I mean, it's a beautiful day.
You want to go for a walk?

1102
01:26:14,821 --> 01:26:17,084
[static feedback squealing]

1103
01:26:17,128 --> 01:26:19,826
Nah, come on. It's...
It's a nice day.

1104
01:26:22,089 --> 01:26:26,093
So it might sound weird,

1105
01:26:26,137 --> 01:26:29,227
but I could almost,
in an odd way,

1106
01:26:29,271 --> 01:26:31,621
say that I'm sort of a fan
of your work...

1107
01:26:31,664 --> 01:26:33,840
- [static feedback squealing]
- ...because...

1108
01:26:33,884 --> 01:26:37,322
Yeah, I know,
I think a lot of people have

1109
01:26:37,366 --> 01:26:39,324
some weird opinions about you,

1110
01:26:39,368 --> 01:26:42,588
but I'm also
an animal rights activist,

1111
01:26:42,632 --> 01:26:46,592
and for most animals,
especially the ones
on factory farms, like,

1112
01:26:46,636 --> 01:26:50,161
who experience nothing
in their entire lives
but sickness and suffering,

1113
01:26:50,205 --> 01:26:55,035
like without you, there's
no end to their suffering.

1114
01:26:55,079 --> 01:27:00,563
I mean think of all the sick
and suffering people.

1115
01:27:00,606 --> 01:27:03,087
You know, without you,

1116
01:27:03,130 --> 01:27:07,004
there is quite literally
no end to their suffering.

1117
01:27:07,047 --> 01:27:10,616
I mean, you are merciful.

1118
01:27:10,660 --> 01:27:14,664
And I think it's also a little
strange that people
are afraid of you

1119
01:27:14,707 --> 01:27:16,969
and have such negative opinions
about you because

1120
01:27:17,014 --> 01:27:23,063
you're the only, literally,
the only guarantee
in people's lives.

1121
01:27:23,107 --> 01:27:26,632
Yeah, I'm really,
I mean, look, I mean,

1122
01:27:26,675 --> 01:27:29,244
I meet a lot of public figures

1123
01:27:29,287 --> 01:27:35,075
and I really don't want
to be some fan weirdo,

1124
01:27:35,119 --> 01:27:37,687
but yeah, I...

1125
01:27:37,730 --> 01:27:38,905
I, I...

1126
01:27:38,949 --> 01:27:41,081
But I am wondering,

1127
01:27:41,125 --> 01:27:45,129
and I hear... you probably
hear this all the time,

1128
01:27:45,172 --> 01:27:49,089
but like what happens
after we die?

1129
01:27:49,133 --> 01:27:52,267
[static feedback squealing]

1130
01:27:56,749 --> 01:27:58,403
[electronica playing]

1131
01:28:47,191 --> 01:28:50,281
[muffled echoes,
liquid burbling]

1132
01:29:15,915 --> 01:29:20,877
♪ Oh...

1133
01:29:20,920 --> 01:29:25,751
♪ We close our eyes

1134
01:29:25,795 --> 01:29:29,494
♪ The perfect life

1135
01:29:29,538 --> 01:29:31,496
♪ Life

1136
01:29:31,540 --> 01:29:34,107
♪ Is all we need

1137
01:29:34,151 --> 01:29:35,413
Everybody! Come on.

1138
01:29:35,457 --> 01:29:37,763
- ♪ Ah, ah...
- Make some noise!

1139
01:29:37,807 --> 01:29:42,159
♪ Oh

1140
01:29:42,202 --> 01:29:47,730
♪ We close our eyes

1141
01:29:47,773 --> 01:29:50,994
♪ The perfect life

1142
01:29:51,037 --> 01:29:52,822
♪ Life

1143
01:29:52,865 --> 01:29:56,173
♪ Is all we need

1144
01:29:56,216 --> 01:29:58,784
- One more, come on.
- A cappella.

1145
01:29:58,827 --> 01:30:03,005
♪ Oh!

1146
01:30:03,049 --> 01:30:08,141
♪ We close our eyes

1147
01:30:08,184 --> 01:30:11,710
♪ The perfect life

1148
01:30:11,754 --> 01:30:13,538
♪ Life

1149
01:30:13,582 --> 01:30:16,454
♪ Is all we need

1150
01:30:16,498 --> 01:30:19,326
Whoo!

1151
01:30:19,370 --> 01:30:23,635
♪ Oh

1152
01:30:23,679 --> 01:30:29,293
♪ We close our eyes

1153
01:30:29,335 --> 01:30:32,469
♪ The perfect life

1154
01:30:32,514 --> 01:30:34,254
♪ Life

1155
01:30:34,298 --> 01:30:38,607
♪ Is all we need

1156
01:30:40,739 --> 01:30:44,482
[falsetto] ♪ Oh

1157
01:30:44,526 --> 01:30:50,183
♪ We close our eyes

1158
01:30:50,227 --> 01:30:53,709
♪ The perfect life

1159
01:30:53,752 --> 01:30:55,362
♪ Life

1160
01:30:55,406 --> 01:30:58,888
♪ Is all we need

1161
01:31:01,804 --> 01:31:05,547
♪ Oh

1162
01:31:05,590 --> 01:31:10,813
♪ We close our eyes

1163
01:31:10,856 --> 01:31:14,425
♪ The perfect life

1164
01:31:14,469 --> 01:31:16,035
♪ Life

1165
01:31:16,079 --> 01:31:19,125
♪ Is all we need

1166
01:31:22,346 --> 01:31:26,437
♪ Oh

1167
01:31:26,481 --> 01:31:31,877
♪ We close our eyes

1168
01:31:31,921 --> 01:31:35,446
♪ The perfect life

1169
01:31:35,490 --> 01:31:37,187
♪ Life

1170
01:31:37,230 --> 01:31:40,538
♪ Is all we need

1171
01:31:43,193 --> 01:31:47,284
♪ Oh

1172
01:31:47,327 --> 01:31:52,724
♪ We close our eyes

1173
01:31:52,768 --> 01:31:56,249
♪ The perfect life

1174
01:31:56,293 --> 01:31:58,077
♪ Life

1175
01:31:58,121 --> 01:32:01,166
♪ Is all we need