1 00:00:02,001 --> 00:00:04,743 [Betty] To all the subscribers ofThe Teenage Mystique, 2 00:00:04,787 --> 00:00:07,050 something happened to me. 3 00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:10,010 And I've read your stories and watched so many people be wronged, 4 00:00:10,053 --> 00:00:12,882 so I can't hold back any longer. 5 00:00:12,925 --> 00:00:15,015 All I wanted to do was understand 6 00:00:15,058 --> 00:00:18,975 my authentic self, my desires, my place in the world. 7 00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:21,238 Because of that, I was forced to be a cheerleader, 8 00:00:21,282 --> 00:00:22,761 I was put into therapy, 9 00:00:22,805 --> 00:00:25,764 my private diaries were read, I was demeaned. 10 00:00:25,808 --> 00:00:29,377 I am not your mother anymore. 11 00:00:30,508 --> 00:00:31,814 And then I was... 12 00:00:33,816 --> 00:00:34,686 slapped. 13 00:00:34,730 --> 00:00:35,905 [grunts] 14 00:00:39,213 --> 00:00:41,606 Well, I'm finally going to tell the truth. 15 00:00:41,650 --> 00:00:44,174 This is my manifesto, my book, 16 00:00:44,218 --> 00:00:47,264 The Collected and Expanded Teenage Mystique. 17 00:00:47,308 --> 00:00:49,745 Every thought I've ever had, uncensored. 18 00:00:49,788 --> 00:00:52,922 Only the truth will be allowed in these pages. 19 00:00:52,965 --> 00:00:55,403 The truth about being a teenager. 20 00:00:55,446 --> 00:00:57,187 Our stories. 21 00:00:57,231 --> 00:00:59,407 And if it burns this small-minded town to the ground, 22 00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:01,235 well, so be it. 23 00:01:02,845 --> 00:01:05,239 So, how do you wanna do this? 24 00:01:05,282 --> 00:01:07,850 Wanna go in first and I mosey on in 30 seconds later? 25 00:01:09,112 --> 00:01:10,418 Absolutely not. 26 00:01:10,461 --> 00:01:12,637 Veronica Lodge's signature color may be purple, 27 00:01:12,681 --> 00:01:14,030 but she is no shrinking violet. 28 00:01:14,813 --> 00:01:16,337 So, come on. 29 00:01:16,380 --> 00:01:18,687 Let's give these cubes something juicy to goss about. 30 00:01:18,730 --> 00:01:20,906 ["Come On" playing] 31 00:01:20,950 --> 00:01:22,256 -♪ So young ♪ -♪ So young ♪ 32 00:01:22,299 --> 00:01:23,866 -♪ So fine ♪ -♪ So fine ♪ 33 00:01:23,908 --> 00:01:26,477 -♪ Won't you be mine? ♪ -♪ Won't you be mine? ♪ 34 00:01:26,521 --> 00:01:30,916 ♪ Oh, girl, come on ♪ 35 00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,441 ♪ Whoa, we gonna Have a lot of fun ♪ 36 00:01:33,484 --> 00:01:35,269 ♪ You just wait and see ♪ 37 00:01:35,312 --> 00:01:36,747 ♪ Just wait and see ♪ 38 00:01:36,792 --> 00:01:38,968 -♪ Oh, I like ♪ -♪ I like ♪ 39 00:01:39,011 --> 00:01:42,798 -♪ The way you smile at me ♪ -♪ The way you smile at me ♪ 40 00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:44,495 ♪ Come on ♪ 41 00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:47,150 ♪ Girl, come on ♪ 42 00:01:47,194 --> 00:01:49,892 ♪ Whoa, we gonna Have a lot of fun ♪ 43 00:01:49,935 --> 00:01:51,414 ♪ You just wait and see ♪ 44 00:01:51,459 --> 00:01:53,069 Wowza. 45 00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,765 I've never had so many peepers on me at one time. 46 00:01:54,810 --> 00:01:56,246 Well, if it's any consolation, 47 00:01:56,289 --> 00:01:57,856 I haven't gotten this much attention 48 00:01:57,900 --> 00:02:00,076 since I arrived to school wearing my sexy witch costume. 49 00:02:03,688 --> 00:02:05,255 Sexy witch costume? 50 00:02:05,299 --> 00:02:06,952 Jughead Jones. 51 00:02:06,996 --> 00:02:09,955 Do you have a thing for sexy teen witches? 52 00:02:09,999 --> 00:02:11,261 Well, yes. 53 00:02:11,305 --> 00:02:12,567 [chuckling] Yes, I do. 54 00:02:12,610 --> 00:02:14,569 But I also know a boss idea when I hear one, 55 00:02:14,612 --> 00:02:17,180 and sexy teen witch is a very boss idea. 56 00:02:17,224 --> 00:02:20,575 Hmm. Well, glad to have inspired something. 57 00:02:22,533 --> 00:02:23,491 Catch you later, alligator. 58 00:02:30,411 --> 00:02:32,674 So, what do you think, Mrs. Grundy? [chuckles] 59 00:02:32,716 --> 00:02:33,675 [Ms. Grundy] Archie... 60 00:02:34,980 --> 00:02:36,373 This latest poem is... 61 00:02:37,809 --> 00:02:39,333 Excellent. 62 00:02:39,376 --> 00:02:42,204 It's so much more mature than your earlier work. 63 00:02:42,249 --> 00:02:43,946 -It's like you grew up overnight. -I... 64 00:02:43,989 --> 00:02:45,991 -What happened? -I... 65 00:02:49,430 --> 00:02:52,084 I... I watched the sunrise like you suggested. 66 00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:55,218 Among other things. [chuckles] 67 00:02:55,262 --> 00:02:57,307 Well, keep doing whatever it is you're doing. 68 00:02:57,351 --> 00:03:00,702 Well, I am definitely going back. 69 00:03:00,745 --> 00:03:03,357 I will definitely do that. 70 00:03:04,967 --> 00:03:05,924 Just keep at it, like you said. 71 00:03:05,968 --> 00:03:08,013 [bell rings] 72 00:03:09,537 --> 00:03:11,278 ["Fine Little Baby" playing] 73 00:03:13,976 --> 00:03:15,543 ♪ Well ♪ 74 00:03:15,586 --> 00:03:19,199 ♪ My baby boogies When the sun is shinin' ♪ 75 00:03:19,242 --> 00:03:22,506 ♪ She likes to make it And there ain't no time ♪ 76 00:03:22,550 --> 00:03:25,988 ♪ When she do, do what she do ♪ 77 00:03:26,031 --> 00:03:26,902 [vocalizing] 78 00:03:26,945 --> 00:03:27,990 Good morning, class. 79 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:31,385 [continues indistinctly] 80 00:03:31,428 --> 00:03:33,125 ♪ Knock him dead ♪ 81 00:03:33,168 --> 00:03:35,780 ♪ Bye-bye, bye ♪ 82 00:03:35,824 --> 00:03:37,695 ♪ Well, it's a fine Little girl ♪ 83 00:03:37,739 --> 00:03:39,741 [vocalizing] 84 00:03:39,784 --> 00:03:40,916 [Julian] Come on. You're yanking my chain, Mantle. 85 00:03:40,959 --> 00:03:42,526 Shh! 86 00:03:42,570 --> 00:03:44,528 Cool it. Not so loud. 87 00:03:44,572 --> 00:03:46,400 You and Andrews? 88 00:03:46,442 --> 00:03:47,749 At the same time? 89 00:03:47,792 --> 00:03:48,924 -[vending machine rattling] -Andrews. 90 00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:52,275 Is it true? 91 00:03:52,319 --> 00:03:55,017 You and Reg took a ride on the town bicycle, Twyla Twist, 92 00:03:56,845 --> 00:03:58,586 and you're going back for seconds? 93 00:04:00,283 --> 00:04:01,241 [chuckles] 94 00:04:02,503 --> 00:04:03,895 [whistles] 95 00:04:03,939 --> 00:04:05,245 [Betty] And another thing, dear readers, 96 00:04:05,288 --> 00:04:06,811 I am sick of the double standard 97 00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,857 that celebrates boys for their sexual conquests 98 00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:10,946 and punishes girls for wanting the same. 99 00:04:12,817 --> 00:04:14,906 -[gasps] -Cheryl, I'm sorry. 100 00:04:21,043 --> 00:04:21,913 What are these? 101 00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:29,399 Hey, those pictures are amazing. 102 00:04:29,443 --> 00:04:31,836 Are they from a private collection of yours? 103 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,971 I could try and spin some story, Betty, 104 00:04:37,146 --> 00:04:39,670 but I'm tired of lying. 105 00:04:39,714 --> 00:04:42,499 The truth is, I am going steady with Toni Topaz. 106 00:04:43,500 --> 00:04:45,154 Oh. Oh. 107 00:04:45,197 --> 00:04:47,330 Yeah, well, that makes sense. 108 00:04:47,374 --> 00:04:49,724 And just try to use it against me, I double-dog dare you. 109 00:04:49,767 --> 00:04:50,899 Oh, Cheryl. Don't worry. I... 110 00:04:53,510 --> 00:04:54,816 I'm the Girl Next Door. 111 00:04:54,859 --> 00:04:56,383 I write The Teenage Mystique. 112 00:04:56,426 --> 00:04:59,299 What? I love The Teenage Mystique. 113 00:04:59,342 --> 00:05:01,301 The Girl Next Door's advice is tops. 114 00:05:01,344 --> 00:05:02,476 Oh. 115 00:05:02,519 --> 00:05:04,042 It's an honor to meet you. 116 00:05:04,086 --> 00:05:06,828 -Likewise. -[chuckles] 117 00:05:06,871 --> 00:05:10,266 What are you doing with those amazing pictures? 118 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,529 Honestly, I was going to submit them to Femme-and-Inmagazine 119 00:05:12,573 --> 00:05:14,488 to come out in the most unabashed way, 120 00:05:14,531 --> 00:05:16,664 and blow the lid off of my parent's world once and for all. 121 00:05:16,707 --> 00:05:18,840 That's exactly what I'm trying to do 122 00:05:18,883 --> 00:05:21,190 -with the book version of The Teenage Mystique. -Now that's radioactive, Betty. 123 00:05:21,233 --> 00:05:25,194 It is. And, actually, a story like yours and Toni's, 124 00:05:25,237 --> 00:05:29,329 written by you in your words would be swell to include. 125 00:05:29,372 --> 00:05:33,028 Maybe accompanied by some of those pictures? 126 00:05:33,071 --> 00:05:35,552 I have to talk to Toni, 127 00:05:36,510 --> 00:05:37,554 but, yes, Betty. 128 00:05:37,598 --> 00:05:38,860 The pages of The Teenage Mystique 129 00:05:38,903 --> 00:05:40,688 might just be the perfect forum 130 00:05:40,731 --> 00:05:42,254 for our coming out to the world. 131 00:05:42,298 --> 00:05:43,343 Oh, excellent. 132 00:05:45,736 --> 00:05:47,042 And Cheryl, 133 00:05:47,085 --> 00:05:50,524 do you think you and Toni would be willing 134 00:05:50,567 --> 00:05:52,134 to take pictures like yours of... 135 00:05:53,265 --> 00:05:54,571 Of me, 136 00:05:54,615 --> 00:05:56,573 possibly, for my book cover? 137 00:05:56,617 --> 00:05:58,183 Absolutely. 138 00:05:58,227 --> 00:06:00,055 We can do a photo session. Then you can pick your favorite 139 00:06:00,098 --> 00:06:03,711 and I can turn it into a luxurious, supple oil painting 140 00:06:03,754 --> 00:06:04,712 for your book's cover. 141 00:06:08,977 --> 00:06:10,239 [bell chimes] 142 00:06:34,829 --> 00:06:35,873 [Veronica] I have to tell you, 143 00:06:35,917 --> 00:06:39,007 this is the bee's knees, Jughead. 144 00:06:39,050 --> 00:06:40,835 I didn't realize you could draw too. 145 00:06:40,878 --> 00:06:42,880 [Jughead] Well, I'm no Ethel Muggs, 146 00:06:42,924 --> 00:06:46,318 but I think this brain egg could be the thing to save Pep Comics. 147 00:06:46,362 --> 00:06:48,930 Mr. Fieldstone is looking for a fresh breakout character 148 00:06:48,973 --> 00:06:51,280 to get past the code and bring in new readership, 149 00:06:51,323 --> 00:06:54,588 and I think it's Veronica the Teenage Witch. 150 00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:56,241 [footsteps approaching] 151 00:06:56,284 --> 00:06:58,113 Veronica, you're not gonna believe who's here. 152 00:07:00,550 --> 00:07:03,031 Miss Josie McCoy. 153 00:07:04,728 --> 00:07:07,339 The famous chanteuse? 154 00:07:07,383 --> 00:07:10,212 The founder of the Black American Theater Project? 155 00:07:10,255 --> 00:07:11,953 The newly minted Tony winner? 156 00:07:11,996 --> 00:07:13,607 [chuckles] In the flesh and fur. 157 00:07:13,650 --> 00:07:15,435 To what do we owe this honor? 158 00:07:15,478 --> 00:07:18,481 I've heard about your theater, Miss Lodge. 159 00:07:18,525 --> 00:07:21,310 -I've heard you're not afraid to shake things up. -[chuckles softly] 160 00:07:21,353 --> 00:07:25,270 Well, I've built an entire career out of shaking things up. 161 00:07:25,314 --> 00:07:27,272 You may have heard I've been working on a major motion picture. 162 00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:30,362 Hush-hush, you understand? 163 00:07:37,282 --> 00:07:41,548 I have heard rumors that your Broadway smash, Going Uptown, 164 00:07:41,591 --> 00:07:44,028 is being turned into a movie musical. Yes. 165 00:07:44,072 --> 00:07:45,856 The rumors are true. 166 00:07:45,900 --> 00:07:50,774 A movie musical I wrote, directed, produced, and starred in. 167 00:07:50,818 --> 00:07:53,690 You've always been the definition of a Renaissance woman. 168 00:07:53,734 --> 00:07:57,389 Well, then, you know Josie McCoy is a perfectionist. 169 00:07:57,433 --> 00:08:00,567 This is my first motion picture, you understand? 170 00:08:00,610 --> 00:08:02,917 And I'm still in the middle of my process, still tinkering. 171 00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:05,485 Close friends have seen early cuts, 172 00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:08,357 but I need to know how it plays out in front of a real audience, 173 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:11,708 far away from the prying eyes of my partners at Pasadena Pictures. 174 00:08:11,752 --> 00:08:15,669 I don't need a bunch of starched suits mucking things up 175 00:08:15,712 --> 00:08:17,932 and second-guessing my every creative choice. 176 00:08:19,586 --> 00:08:23,154 Not until I have proof, positive, say, 177 00:08:23,198 --> 00:08:25,505 filled-out questionnaires from a test screening, 178 00:08:25,548 --> 00:08:27,855 possibly at your theater, Miss Lodge. 179 00:08:27,898 --> 00:08:29,334 If it's up to my standards. 180 00:08:31,989 --> 00:08:33,948 [audience applauding in film] 181 00:08:47,614 --> 00:08:48,310 [applauding] 182 00:08:50,399 --> 00:08:51,400 [Veronica] Can I just say 183 00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:55,709 your movie is a surefire hit. 184 00:08:55,752 --> 00:08:57,580 And you, Miss McCoy, 185 00:08:57,624 --> 00:09:01,584 have made the leap to bona fide movie star. Cheers. 186 00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:04,065 But, 187 00:09:04,108 --> 00:09:07,242 why bother with the test screenings? 188 00:09:07,285 --> 00:09:10,419 Let's just have ourselves a good old-fashioned red carpet movie premiere 189 00:09:10,462 --> 00:09:11,986 and blow the roof off this joint. 190 00:09:12,029 --> 00:09:14,554 As I said, I'm still tinkering. 191 00:09:14,597 --> 00:09:16,251 But why tinker with perfection? 192 00:09:16,294 --> 00:09:18,906 You know how skittish studio executives can be. 193 00:09:18,949 --> 00:09:21,517 Unfortunately, all too well. 194 00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,780 I have dealt with my fair share. 195 00:09:23,824 --> 00:09:25,042 They're fear-driven creatures. 196 00:09:25,086 --> 00:09:26,391 Exactly. 197 00:09:26,435 --> 00:09:28,263 All right, then. 198 00:09:28,306 --> 00:09:29,656 Let's give them the proof they need. 199 00:09:29,699 --> 00:09:31,571 I know the drill. 200 00:09:31,614 --> 00:09:32,615 We'll hand out surveys at the end of our test screening. 201 00:09:32,659 --> 00:09:34,617 Uh-uh, one moment. 202 00:09:34,661 --> 00:09:38,055 Miss Lodge, your theater might be up to snuff, 203 00:09:38,099 --> 00:09:40,449 if slightly smaller than I'd hoped. 204 00:09:40,492 --> 00:09:42,886 But I need to make certain that the seats at my screening 205 00:09:42,930 --> 00:09:45,062 -won't be filled with rubes and blue hairs. -[chuckles softly] 206 00:09:46,324 --> 00:09:48,283 I need to get a lay of the land, 207 00:09:48,326 --> 00:09:51,678 see if Riverdale's as hep a town as I've been led to believe. 208 00:09:51,721 --> 00:09:53,549 Oh, we're hep. 209 00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:56,030 But don't take my word for it. 210 00:09:56,073 --> 00:09:58,989 Kevin, Clay and I can show you around. 211 00:09:59,033 --> 00:10:01,252 Why don't we meet up tomorrow morning at 8:00 for a tour? 212 00:10:01,296 --> 00:10:04,081 Eight in the morning? [laughing] 213 00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:05,866 Oh, no, no, no. 214 00:10:05,909 --> 00:10:09,217 -I, my dear, am a creature of the night. -[chuckles softly] 215 00:10:09,260 --> 00:10:13,264 I roll out of bed leisurely and start drinking espresso at 3:00 in the afternoon. 216 00:10:13,308 --> 00:10:16,311 You will see me at dusk and not a moment sooner. 217 00:10:16,354 --> 00:10:19,140 Well, there are a few hotels in town, 218 00:10:19,183 --> 00:10:22,622 but why don't you stay with me at the Pembrooke? 219 00:10:22,665 --> 00:10:25,712 It's sort of like The Plaza. By way of the Dakota. 220 00:10:25,755 --> 00:10:27,496 Can I take you there and get you settled? 221 00:10:28,497 --> 00:10:29,280 [chuckles] 222 00:10:30,499 --> 00:10:31,500 I like you, Miss Lodge. 223 00:10:34,024 --> 00:10:36,810 I think we're going to get on just fine. 224 00:10:45,514 --> 00:10:47,821 [chuckling] Hi, Miss Twist. 225 00:10:49,736 --> 00:10:53,609 I, uh, was hoping that maybe we could see each other again. 226 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:56,090 Oh, yeah, I remember you now. 227 00:10:56,133 --> 00:10:57,700 [both chuckling] 228 00:10:57,744 --> 00:11:00,442 Well, you got it wrong, Red. 229 00:11:00,485 --> 00:11:03,184 You see, Twyla is happy to help a fella out of a rut. 230 00:11:03,227 --> 00:11:05,099 She doesn't do long-term. 231 00:11:05,142 --> 00:11:06,666 Especially not with puppy dogs. 232 00:11:06,709 --> 00:11:07,579 Oh, but I... 233 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:09,973 really need the experience. 234 00:11:10,017 --> 00:11:11,583 [Twyla] If, that's the case, 235 00:11:11,627 --> 00:11:13,890 Lord knows, there's got to be some hot older mama 236 00:11:13,934 --> 00:11:16,023 who would love to take a bite out of a Red Delicious like yourself. 237 00:11:17,241 --> 00:11:18,112 You dig? 238 00:11:20,027 --> 00:11:21,637 ["No Doubt About It" playing] 239 00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:23,247 ♪ No doubt about it ♪ 240 00:11:24,901 --> 00:11:26,076 [doorbell rings] 241 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:28,122 ♪ Ooh, baby ♪ 242 00:11:28,165 --> 00:11:30,080 ♪ I'll shout all about it ♪ 243 00:11:31,560 --> 00:11:32,996 ♪ Tell the world you're mine ♪ 244 00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:34,563 [Toni] Okay. Are you ready? 245 00:11:34,606 --> 00:11:35,695 Yes. 246 00:11:35,738 --> 00:11:38,132 One, two, three. 247 00:11:39,263 --> 00:11:41,309 [chuckles] 248 00:11:41,352 --> 00:11:42,702 So pretty. Okay, let's take two more. 249 00:11:42,745 --> 00:11:44,225 ♪ No doubt about it ♪ 250 00:11:44,268 --> 00:11:46,706 ♪ Ooh, baby ♪ 251 00:11:46,749 --> 00:11:48,708 [camera flashing] 252 00:12:00,502 --> 00:12:02,591 Hey, Veronica, can I talk to you for a second? 253 00:12:04,375 --> 00:12:06,551 Word from the bird is that Josie McCoy's in town, 254 00:12:06,595 --> 00:12:09,380 and you might be bringing her to the Dark Room's open mic tonight. 255 00:12:11,034 --> 00:12:14,385 My, gossip travels fast in this town, doesn't it? 256 00:12:14,429 --> 00:12:18,433 If that's the case, my boy, Fangs, here is going to perform. 257 00:12:18,476 --> 00:12:21,088 If he and Midge are going to make a go of it, he needs a big break, 258 00:12:21,131 --> 00:12:23,655 one that Josie might be able to provide. 259 00:12:23,699 --> 00:12:27,094 Do you think Miss McCoy would be willing to pick up what I'm putting down? 260 00:12:27,137 --> 00:12:30,271 Now I can't speak for Miss McCoy, of course. 261 00:12:30,314 --> 00:12:33,230 But if there's one thing a star like her recognizes, 262 00:12:33,274 --> 00:12:33,883 it's talent. 263 00:12:38,148 --> 00:12:39,367 [Archie] Good morning, Mrs. Grundy. 264 00:12:39,410 --> 00:12:40,760 I brought you something. 265 00:12:41,586 --> 00:12:43,719 That is so sweet. Thank you. 266 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:46,940 And Red Delicious is my favorite. 267 00:12:46,983 --> 00:12:49,420 I, actually... I wanted to let you know 268 00:12:49,464 --> 00:12:52,728 I'm performing a new poem I wrote at the Dark Room tonight. 269 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:55,949 Yeah, I'd really be jazzed if you could make it and hear it. [chuckles] 270 00:12:55,992 --> 00:12:59,387 Well, I'm touched that you would think of me. 271 00:12:59,430 --> 00:13:01,781 And yes, of course I will be there. 272 00:13:01,824 --> 00:13:02,999 Anything for my favorite student. 273 00:13:06,568 --> 00:13:08,657 [Jughead] She's bewitching. She casts spells. 274 00:13:08,700 --> 00:13:10,920 Nothing harmful or offensive, of course. 275 00:13:10,964 --> 00:13:12,313 But mostly, she's a high school student. 276 00:13:12,356 --> 00:13:13,793 She goes to class, does her homework, 277 00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:15,838 gets into romantic trouble. 278 00:13:15,882 --> 00:13:19,233 You know, good old-fashioned, wholesome, vampy, campy fun. 279 00:13:19,276 --> 00:13:20,843 -What do you think? -Well, 280 00:13:20,887 --> 00:13:23,977 I think if she's going to stand a snowball's chance in hell 281 00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:25,369 of getting past the Tribunal, 282 00:13:25,413 --> 00:13:28,111 we're gonna have to sand the edges a little bit. 283 00:13:28,155 --> 00:13:30,200 They hear the word "witch", 284 00:13:30,244 --> 00:13:32,202 they're gonna be going for their pitchforks, you know. 285 00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:33,987 -Teenage witch. -No, no. 286 00:13:34,030 --> 00:13:35,640 I'm not saying we ditch the concept. 287 00:13:35,684 --> 00:13:36,467 I'm just saying, 288 00:13:38,252 --> 00:13:40,645 I don't know, make her a half-witch. 289 00:13:40,689 --> 00:13:42,386 And you'll have to get her out of this getup. 290 00:13:42,430 --> 00:13:44,736 Too much cleavage. 291 00:13:44,780 --> 00:13:47,087 -And make her a blonde. -Blonde? 292 00:13:47,130 --> 00:13:48,915 And you'll have to come up with a new name, of course. 293 00:13:48,958 --> 00:13:50,220 New name? 294 00:13:50,264 --> 00:13:52,657 Yeah, Veronica? [scoffs] 295 00:13:52,701 --> 00:13:53,963 Reminds me of Veronica Lake. 296 00:13:54,007 --> 00:13:57,488 Too sexy, too dangerous, too, um, curvy. 297 00:13:57,532 --> 00:13:59,273 Trust me, if you... 298 00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:02,232 It's gonna pass muster with those prudes over at the Tribunal, 299 00:14:02,276 --> 00:14:03,755 Nope, it has to be, uh... 300 00:14:03,799 --> 00:14:05,018 Has to be something sweeter. 301 00:14:05,061 --> 00:14:06,628 Yeah, I don't know. Magical. 302 00:14:11,198 --> 00:14:11,807 [sighs] 303 00:14:22,644 --> 00:14:26,648 Now, you pick the one you like the most, and I will paint it. 304 00:14:26,691 --> 00:14:30,782 That way, we'll get the exact look you want for your book's cover. 305 00:14:36,788 --> 00:14:37,615 What's the hiccup? 306 00:14:37,659 --> 00:14:39,879 Are you displeased? 307 00:14:39,922 --> 00:14:42,011 No, I'm so glad that I'm coming out 308 00:14:42,055 --> 00:14:44,231 as the voice behind The Teenage Mystique. 309 00:14:46,059 --> 00:14:50,715 I just can't help feeling a little bit like a fraud. 310 00:14:50,759 --> 00:14:53,936 Dressing in lingerie, writing about sex 311 00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:57,984 when I haven't experienced anything even remotely sexually satisfying myself. 312 00:14:58,027 --> 00:14:59,463 -[Cheryl] What do you mean? -[sighs] 313 00:14:59,507 --> 00:15:01,465 I mean... 314 00:15:01,509 --> 00:15:05,469 Everyone I know is having or has had sex. 315 00:15:05,513 --> 00:15:07,167 And I'm the only teenager in the world 316 00:15:07,210 --> 00:15:09,996 who can't seem to find someone to go there with me. 317 00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:13,913 Betty, you do know a woman doesn't 318 00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:17,351 need anyone to be sexually satisfied? 319 00:15:18,308 --> 00:15:19,135 She can... 320 00:15:20,615 --> 00:15:22,225 do it on her own. 321 00:15:22,269 --> 00:15:25,098 I did read about self-pleasure in Kingsley's book, 322 00:15:25,141 --> 00:15:27,100 but it wasn't exactly a how-to manual. 323 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:29,015 I see. 324 00:15:29,841 --> 00:15:30,930 However... 325 00:15:34,629 --> 00:15:39,373 This particularly illuminating issue of Femme-and-Inmagazine 326 00:15:39,415 --> 00:15:41,941 might be exactly what the doctor ordered. 327 00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:44,290 And I certainly don't mean Werthers. 328 00:15:44,334 --> 00:15:48,034 Turns out, all a woman needs to be sexually satisfied 329 00:15:48,077 --> 00:15:52,038 is a bathtub, a bathroom with a lock on it, 330 00:15:52,081 --> 00:15:52,952 and... 331 00:15:54,388 --> 00:15:55,955 Shall we say, 332 00:15:56,999 --> 00:15:59,959 a helping hand? 333 00:16:00,002 --> 00:16:02,700 [Veronica] Veronica The Teenage Witch is too sexy, you say? 334 00:16:02,744 --> 00:16:04,964 I mean, he's not wrong. 335 00:16:05,007 --> 00:16:07,314 I am cut from the same cloth as Veronica Lake 336 00:16:07,357 --> 00:16:11,448 and therefore, too provocative for those feeble-minded censors. 337 00:16:11,492 --> 00:16:13,320 It's their loss. 338 00:16:13,363 --> 00:16:15,191 On top of which, I have to figure out a new name, 339 00:16:16,149 --> 00:16:18,194 something more magical. 340 00:16:18,238 --> 00:16:22,503 Hey, did you happen to see that Audrey Hepburn picture that came out last year? 341 00:16:22,546 --> 00:16:24,331 Her character had a superb name in that. 342 00:16:26,202 --> 00:16:27,638 What was that movie called again? 343 00:16:27,682 --> 00:16:29,075 Sabrina. 344 00:16:29,118 --> 00:16:30,380 Audrey played the title character. 345 00:16:30,424 --> 00:16:31,468 Sabrina. 346 00:16:31,512 --> 00:16:32,556 Yeah. 347 00:16:34,123 --> 00:16:35,907 Yeah, that could be the ticket. 348 00:16:42,784 --> 00:16:47,223 "In the bloom of Eden's garden, the first transgression. 349 00:16:47,267 --> 00:16:50,096 A simple apple, Eve learned her lesson. 350 00:16:52,576 --> 00:16:55,188 Different garden, same temptation. 351 00:16:57,364 --> 00:17:00,541 A young man seeking an education. 352 00:17:05,198 --> 00:17:08,027 A teacher's pupil brings her apples, 353 00:17:08,069 --> 00:17:10,637 and sinful thoughts with which he grapples. 354 00:17:10,681 --> 00:17:13,944 While she teaches, he sits through classes 355 00:17:13,989 --> 00:17:15,382 wondering how she looks 356 00:17:16,905 --> 00:17:18,037 without those glasses." 357 00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:20,039 [audience muttering indistinctly] 358 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,267 Jeepers, Archie, that was kind of off the cob. 359 00:17:33,008 --> 00:17:35,054 Better luck next time, champ. 360 00:17:38,666 --> 00:17:41,060 Honestly, if that's what passes for art in Riverdale, 361 00:17:41,103 --> 00:17:42,235 I don't think this is going to work. 362 00:17:42,278 --> 00:17:44,193 Just you wait, Josie. 363 00:17:44,237 --> 00:17:46,413 There's another act coming up that will have you positively purring. 364 00:17:46,456 --> 00:17:48,110 [Toni] Well, it's official. 365 00:17:48,154 --> 00:17:50,895 After that poem, this is the iciest room on the Eastern Seaboard. 366 00:17:50,939 --> 00:17:52,245 No worries, though. 367 00:17:52,288 --> 00:17:56,249 Give it up for my boy, Fangs Fogarty. 368 00:17:56,292 --> 00:17:59,078 -Whoo! -[all applauding] 369 00:17:59,121 --> 00:18:00,731 [playing funky music] 370 00:18:00,775 --> 00:18:03,691 ♪ You shake my nerves And you rattle my brain ♪ 371 00:18:03,734 --> 00:18:06,302 ♪ Too much of love Drive a man insane ♪ 372 00:18:06,346 --> 00:18:09,740 ♪ You broke my will But what a thrill ♪ 373 00:18:09,784 --> 00:18:12,526 ♪ Goodness gracious Great balls of fire ♪ 374 00:18:12,569 --> 00:18:15,529 ♪ I laughed at love 'Cause I thought it was funny ♪ 375 00:18:15,572 --> 00:18:18,793 ♪ You came along You moved me, honey ♪ 376 00:18:18,836 --> 00:18:21,622 ♪ I've changed my mind This love is fine ♪ 377 00:18:21,665 --> 00:18:24,277 ♪ Goodness gracious Great balls of fire ♪ 378 00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:26,322 [Betty] The only person you need to know how to please... 379 00:18:27,280 --> 00:18:28,542 is yourself. 380 00:18:28,585 --> 00:18:29,630 ♪ Whoo, feels good ♪ 381 00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:32,981 ♪ Hold me, baby ♪ 382 00:18:33,024 --> 00:18:36,463 ♪ Well, I want to love you Like a lover should ♪ 383 00:18:36,506 --> 00:18:39,161 ♪ You're fine, so kind ♪ 384 00:18:39,205 --> 00:18:42,643 ♪ Come to tell the world That you're mine, mine Mine, mine ♪ 385 00:18:42,686 --> 00:18:45,863 ♪ I chew my nails Then I twiddle my thumbs ♪ 386 00:18:45,907 --> 00:18:48,257 ♪ I'm real nervous But it sure is fun ♪ 387 00:18:48,301 --> 00:18:51,652 ♪ Come on, baby Drive me crazy ♪ 388 00:18:51,695 --> 00:18:54,220 ♪ Goodness gracious Great balls of fire ♪ 389 00:18:56,265 --> 00:18:58,920 ♪ Well ♪ 390 00:18:58,963 --> 00:19:01,052 ♪ Kiss me, baby ♪ 391 00:19:01,096 --> 00:19:05,056 ♪ Whoo, feels good ♪ 392 00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:07,276 ♪ Hold me, baby ♪ 393 00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:11,019 ♪ Well, I still love you Like a lover should ♪ 394 00:19:11,062 --> 00:19:14,327 ♪ You're fine, so kind ♪ 395 00:19:14,370 --> 00:19:17,156 ♪ Come to tell this world That you're mine, mine Mine, mine ♪ 396 00:19:17,199 --> 00:19:20,115 ♪ I chew my nails Then I twiddle my thumbs ♪ 397 00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:22,944 ♪ Real nervous But it sure is fun ♪ 398 00:19:22,987 --> 00:19:26,077 ♪ Come on, baby You drive me crazy ♪ 399 00:19:26,121 --> 00:19:28,776 ♪ Goodness gracious Great balls of fire ♪ 400 00:19:29,864 --> 00:19:30,995 [audience clapping] 401 00:19:32,083 --> 00:19:34,085 [cheering and whistling] 402 00:19:38,525 --> 00:19:39,308 [sighs] 403 00:19:43,791 --> 00:19:45,314 What did I tell you? 404 00:19:45,358 --> 00:19:47,490 -Hep, no? -[Josie] Hmm. 405 00:19:47,534 --> 00:19:51,190 Rock 'n' roll isn't my genre, of course, but... 406 00:19:52,582 --> 00:19:54,149 He has something. 407 00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:57,500 Touch of star quality. And that's more than most. 408 00:19:57,544 --> 00:19:59,154 Let me ask you. 409 00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:01,200 How is he on the bongos? Do you know? 410 00:20:02,157 --> 00:20:04,115 To my knowledge, 411 00:20:04,159 --> 00:20:08,032 there is no better bongo player in Riverdale. Why? 412 00:20:12,298 --> 00:20:14,038 ["I'm a Different Kind of Cat" playing] 413 00:20:25,876 --> 00:20:27,530 ♪ Have you heard That us females ♪ 414 00:20:28,575 --> 00:20:30,229 ♪ Are a feline breed? ♪ 415 00:20:31,665 --> 00:20:32,622 ♪ That kittens purr ♪ 416 00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:35,582 ♪ According to its needs ♪ 417 00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:38,324 ♪ That some cats will fall ♪ 418 00:20:39,586 --> 00:20:41,152 ♪ For a Riviera ball ♪ 419 00:20:42,415 --> 00:20:44,155 ♪ Or for the Taj Mahal ♪ 420 00:20:44,199 --> 00:20:46,593 ♪ Mmm, or for anything at all ♪ 421 00:20:53,077 --> 00:20:55,602 ♪ Like diamonds ♪ 422 00:20:58,692 --> 00:21:01,782 ♪ Or a painted picket fence ♪ 423 00:21:01,825 --> 00:21:06,482 ♪ But me, I make A different kind of sense ♪ 424 00:21:10,617 --> 00:21:12,575 ♪ I'm a different kind of cat ♪ 425 00:21:15,926 --> 00:21:17,667 ♪ I like love ♪ 426 00:21:18,842 --> 00:21:19,713 ♪ And that is that ♪ 427 00:21:21,932 --> 00:21:24,631 ♪ I'm not Persian or Angora ♪ 428 00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:31,681 ♪ I'm in a different category ♪ 429 00:21:33,553 --> 00:21:35,294 ♪ I'm a... ♪ 430 00:21:38,732 --> 00:21:40,299 ♪ Different kind of cat ♪ 431 00:21:43,345 --> 00:21:45,739 ♪ I like love ♪ 432 00:21:49,569 --> 00:21:50,700 ♪ And that is that ♪ 433 00:21:56,445 --> 00:21:58,491 [audience cheering] 434 00:22:16,552 --> 00:22:18,249 [Veronica] Well... 435 00:22:18,293 --> 00:22:22,079 It's almost done, Miss McCoy. and we're all still here. 436 00:22:22,123 --> 00:22:24,734 So what do you say? 437 00:22:24,778 --> 00:22:27,563 Is Riverdale hep enough for a test screening of Going Uptown? 438 00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:30,784 [chuckles] Let's do it. 439 00:22:32,742 --> 00:22:35,876 Miss McCoy, at the risk of overstepping, 440 00:22:38,487 --> 00:22:42,926 would you also possibly consider attending a meeting of Black Athena at Riverdale High? 441 00:22:42,970 --> 00:22:45,712 It would mean so much to our members to meet a Black icon like you. 442 00:22:45,755 --> 00:22:46,887 Well, I like the sound of that. 443 00:22:46,930 --> 00:22:49,759 But what exactly is Black Athena? 444 00:22:49,803 --> 00:22:53,763 It's a literary society I started for the Black students at Riverdale High. 445 00:22:53,807 --> 00:22:57,376 Hmm. Well, now that's something Josie McCoy can certainly get behind. 446 00:23:03,947 --> 00:23:05,122 Archie. 447 00:23:05,166 --> 00:23:06,210 Mrs. Grundy, 448 00:23:09,257 --> 00:23:12,391 We didn't get a chance to talk last night after my poem. 449 00:23:12,434 --> 00:23:15,219 No, I had to rush home. 450 00:23:15,263 --> 00:23:17,787 My husband was expecting me for a late dinner. 451 00:23:18,353 --> 00:23:19,398 Oh. 452 00:23:20,660 --> 00:23:24,925 Okay. Well, what do you think? 453 00:23:24,968 --> 00:23:29,190 I think we need to switch gears. 454 00:23:31,671 --> 00:23:38,025 Love poems are all well and good, but I would like you to branch out. 455 00:23:40,593 --> 00:23:43,378 Okay... Sure. 456 00:23:45,685 --> 00:23:46,773 Okay. 457 00:23:46,816 --> 00:23:48,427 Anything you want, Mrs. Grundy. 458 00:23:48,470 --> 00:23:51,604 I want you to write about pain. 459 00:23:51,647 --> 00:23:54,868 Physical pain, emotional pain, psychological pain. 460 00:23:56,652 --> 00:23:58,393 "What is my most painful experience?" 461 00:23:59,655 --> 00:24:01,048 And write about that. 462 00:24:04,704 --> 00:24:07,794 And let's take young heartbreak off the table. 463 00:24:08,969 --> 00:24:11,754 As a topic, okay? 464 00:24:23,244 --> 00:24:25,551 I was so inspired. I stayed up all night. 465 00:24:25,594 --> 00:24:26,465 So did I. 466 00:24:27,509 --> 00:24:29,772 So was I. [clears throat] 467 00:24:32,035 --> 00:24:33,994 Do you hate it? I can adjust anything. 468 00:24:34,037 --> 00:24:35,299 -The background? -No, no, don't. 469 00:24:36,866 --> 00:24:38,607 Don't... Don't change anything. 470 00:24:42,393 --> 00:24:43,220 It's beautiful. 471 00:24:44,352 --> 00:24:45,701 Silly goose. 472 00:24:48,008 --> 00:24:49,705 You're beautiful. 473 00:24:56,451 --> 00:24:57,017 [laughing] 474 00:24:58,845 --> 00:25:02,196 Kid, I gotta say, I love this. 475 00:25:02,239 --> 00:25:05,155 I think you've struck gold here. Sabrina the Teenage Witch. 476 00:25:05,199 --> 00:25:07,157 Now that's a title. 477 00:25:07,201 --> 00:25:10,073 I'm going to send this off to the tribunal for review, stat. 478 00:25:10,987 --> 00:25:12,598 But congratulations, kid. 479 00:25:12,641 --> 00:25:15,731 I think this cutie patootie half witch of yours is gonna 480 00:25:15,775 --> 00:25:19,735 single-handedly save Pep Comics from the dustbin of obscurity. 481 00:25:24,131 --> 00:25:25,524 [Clay] She's a woman who needs no introduction. 482 00:25:27,003 --> 00:25:29,919 Josie McCoy's impact reaches beyond the stage 483 00:25:29,963 --> 00:25:32,748 and into the very fabric of our culture. 484 00:25:32,792 --> 00:25:35,708 I know you're all familiar with the breadth of her incredible work, 485 00:25:35,751 --> 00:25:38,537 but let's dive a little deeper, shall we? 486 00:25:40,103 --> 00:25:41,888 Tracy? 487 00:25:41,931 --> 00:25:45,369 You are unapologetically you, Miss McCoy. 488 00:25:46,936 --> 00:25:51,767 But as someone representing, well, all of us, 489 00:25:51,811 --> 00:25:54,204 did you have to compromise yourself along the way? 490 00:25:54,248 --> 00:25:58,774 -First thing, Tracy? -Yes. 491 00:25:58,818 --> 00:26:03,562 You are not me, and I am not you. And yet, we are all beautiful. 492 00:26:03,605 --> 00:26:09,829 My darlings, our experiences as Black people are multi-faceted 493 00:26:09,872 --> 00:26:11,831 and rich and varied. 494 00:26:11,874 --> 00:26:15,791 But none of us should have to compromise ourselves for anything. 495 00:26:15,835 --> 00:26:22,450 We cannot. Compromise is not a word in my vocabulary, nor should it be in yours. 496 00:26:22,493 --> 00:26:26,846 I cannot help but give my whole self to every performance 497 00:26:26,889 --> 00:26:30,284 because the world deserves every facet of my being. 498 00:26:32,503 --> 00:26:37,073 Miss McCoy, a while back on a trip to New York City, I was lucky enough 499 00:26:37,117 --> 00:26:41,077 to see you as Lady Macbeth, opposite Charles Clayton as Macbeth. 500 00:26:41,121 --> 00:26:44,298 [laughing] That was at my theater in Harlem. I remember. 501 00:26:44,341 --> 00:26:47,780 Mmm-hmm. And your performance has stayed with me ever since. 502 00:26:47,823 --> 00:26:49,825 You were so fierce and commanding, 503 00:26:49,869 --> 00:26:52,523 yet, also vulnerable. 504 00:26:52,567 --> 00:26:55,962 Oh, sweetie, that is the only way I know how to be. 505 00:26:56,005 --> 00:26:57,833 [all chuckle] 506 00:26:57,877 --> 00:27:03,491 Ferocious and vulnerable. All things at once, and when I work, I bleed. 507 00:27:03,534 --> 00:27:04,971 It's as simple as that. 508 00:27:05,014 --> 00:27:06,276 That's what I try to do at my typewriter. 509 00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:07,408 I try to bleed, too. 510 00:27:07,451 --> 00:27:09,279 [chuckles] 511 00:27:09,323 --> 00:27:11,499 Enough about Josie McCoy. 512 00:27:11,542 --> 00:27:16,069 Tell me. Where did the idea for the Black Athena club come from? 513 00:27:16,112 --> 00:27:19,855 When I was in high school, I would've crossed the Sahara for a group like this. 514 00:27:19,899 --> 00:27:22,336 Honestly, Josie, I started this club because I was tired. 515 00:27:23,206 --> 00:27:24,860 Plain and simple. 516 00:27:24,904 --> 00:27:29,865 I was tired of this bogus town telling me who I was. 517 00:27:29,909 --> 00:27:33,564 Tired of treading water in the Caucasian sea of opinions. 518 00:27:34,478 --> 00:27:37,046 We all needed a haven. 519 00:27:37,090 --> 00:27:40,354 And I know I wasn't the only one tired of being told no by the gatekeepers. 520 00:27:41,703 --> 00:27:44,488 -So we... -So you bet on yourselves. 521 00:27:45,881 --> 00:27:46,665 Mmm. 522 00:27:48,318 --> 00:27:49,580 Yes, I can see that. 523 00:27:52,366 --> 00:27:53,672 Yes, I certainly can. 524 00:27:56,022 --> 00:27:58,851 All right, let's blow this out. 525 00:27:58,894 --> 00:28:00,679 I want a full red carpet premiere. 526 00:28:00,722 --> 00:28:02,332 All the bells and whistles. 527 00:28:02,376 --> 00:28:04,378 Spotlights, velvet ropes. 528 00:28:04,421 --> 00:28:07,511 The creme de la creme. My movie is in your hands, Veronica. 529 00:28:07,555 --> 00:28:11,298 But if Going Uptown isn't a hit... 530 00:28:11,341 --> 00:28:13,779 If we invite the press and they don't right 5-star raves, 531 00:28:13,822 --> 00:28:15,694 it won't just be my movie that disappears. 532 00:28:16,956 --> 00:28:17,783 I disappear too. 533 00:28:18,914 --> 00:28:20,568 I won't get a second chance. 534 00:28:20,611 --> 00:28:22,004 And this film cost me everything. 535 00:28:22,962 --> 00:28:23,789 What do you mean... 536 00:28:25,529 --> 00:28:26,400 "cost you everything"? 537 00:28:28,228 --> 00:28:29,708 I financed it myself. 538 00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:34,451 When Going Uptownbecame a Broadway hit... 539 00:28:34,495 --> 00:28:39,413 When I, Josie McCoy made it a hit, they wanted to turn it into a movie. 540 00:28:40,631 --> 00:28:43,765 Of course, I was thrilled. 541 00:28:43,809 --> 00:28:48,030 Until I found out that my part, the part that I won a Tony Award for, 542 00:28:49,771 --> 00:28:53,557 was being reconceived for Lana Turner. 543 00:28:55,255 --> 00:28:55,821 No... 544 00:28:56,604 --> 00:28:57,823 Yes. 545 00:29:00,390 --> 00:29:01,740 It was a slap in the face. 546 00:29:05,178 --> 00:29:09,051 Apparently, the powers that be thought the silver screen 547 00:29:09,095 --> 00:29:13,577 wasn't ready for Josie McCoy and her Black, beautiful self. 548 00:29:13,621 --> 00:29:15,841 So I scrounged up every penny I had. 549 00:29:15,884 --> 00:29:19,583 I even mortgaged my brownstone and I bought the rights 550 00:29:19,627 --> 00:29:22,282 to Going Uptownout from under them, and I made the damn thing myself. 551 00:29:23,892 --> 00:29:28,114 I put everything I had into this picture. 552 00:29:28,157 --> 00:29:34,468 So the test screenings, the surveys, 553 00:29:34,511 --> 00:29:36,775 weren't part of your process. 554 00:29:38,167 --> 00:29:41,214 -They're going to be for... -Studios. 555 00:29:41,257 --> 00:29:45,174 If we tested well enough with Black and white audiences in the sticks, 556 00:29:45,218 --> 00:29:48,351 I thought that maybe... Maybe I could convince one of the majors to... 557 00:29:50,527 --> 00:29:52,094 To distribute Going Uptown. 558 00:29:52,138 --> 00:29:55,489 Then why the change of heart to hold the premier now? 559 00:29:57,883 --> 00:30:01,712 Making Going Uptown, and risking everything for it, 560 00:30:01,756 --> 00:30:05,281 it's the most terrifying thing I have ever done. 561 00:30:07,196 --> 00:30:10,286 The studios. They don't think I'm a movie star, but I know I am. 562 00:30:12,549 --> 00:30:17,293 But Going Uptownwill have to explode like an atomic bomb. 563 00:30:20,862 --> 00:30:23,517 Are you tuned in and hearing my signal straight? 564 00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:29,523 Josie, after the premiere I'm going to throw you, 565 00:30:29,566 --> 00:30:33,657 you are going to have a bidding war on your hands, 566 00:30:33,701 --> 00:30:37,400 which is exactly what a star of your caliber deserves. 567 00:30:39,359 --> 00:30:40,751 [Fogarty] I hate not being able to see you. 568 00:30:41,535 --> 00:30:43,015 Or hold you. 569 00:30:43,058 --> 00:30:44,886 But we're cooking with gas now, baby. 570 00:30:44,930 --> 00:30:48,542 I performed for the Josie McCoy. 571 00:30:48,585 --> 00:30:51,414 She's gonna hook me up with her music producer in New York. 572 00:30:51,458 --> 00:30:53,808 A real hotshot, Alexander Cabot. 573 00:30:53,852 --> 00:30:54,853 Killer Diller! 574 00:30:56,593 --> 00:30:59,770 Oh, Fangs. That's peachy to the max. 575 00:30:59,814 --> 00:31:01,120 I'm gonna get you out of that crazy place. 576 00:31:02,512 --> 00:31:04,471 We'll be together before you know it. 577 00:31:04,514 --> 00:31:06,081 [Jughead] They rejected Sabrina? 578 00:31:06,125 --> 00:31:09,693 Yep. They kicked it back and in record time. 579 00:31:09,737 --> 00:31:12,653 Sabrina the Teenage Witch just ain't gonna fly, kid. 580 00:31:12,696 --> 00:31:14,350 Why? Did they say? 581 00:31:14,394 --> 00:31:17,266 Yeah, they... They gave my ears quite the bashing. 582 00:31:17,310 --> 00:31:20,835 Objected to pretty much everything, like, for starters, that she's a witch. 583 00:31:20,879 --> 00:31:22,358 This is nuts. 584 00:31:22,402 --> 00:31:24,708 Preaching to the choir, kid, preaching to the choir. 585 00:31:24,752 --> 00:31:28,103 -[sighs] -You came up with something fun and whimsical, 586 00:31:28,147 --> 00:31:33,065 and all they saw was witches, Satanism, hocus pocus, and human sacrifices. 587 00:31:33,108 --> 00:31:35,981 I know it's crushing, but shame on us. 588 00:31:36,024 --> 00:31:38,679 We probably never should have tried to launch a comic book 589 00:31:38,722 --> 00:31:40,072 about witch in the middle of a witch hunt. 590 00:31:41,987 --> 00:31:44,119 [Veronica] I'm so sorry, Jughead. 591 00:31:44,163 --> 00:31:46,992 Sabrina The Teenage Witch is a brilliant idea, 592 00:31:47,035 --> 00:31:49,255 and I'm not just saying that because I inspired her. 593 00:31:49,298 --> 00:31:50,473 She's just ahead of her time. 594 00:31:52,780 --> 00:31:54,738 Give it a few years. 595 00:31:54,782 --> 00:31:58,481 Let the hysteria die down and there will be no stopping her. 596 00:31:58,525 --> 00:32:03,095 I just feel like Pep Comics is sinking in quicksand. 597 00:32:03,138 --> 00:32:05,010 Listen, if you're down in the mouth 598 00:32:05,053 --> 00:32:06,794 and not in the mood for a premier, 599 00:32:06,837 --> 00:32:08,448 I'd completely understand. 600 00:32:08,491 --> 00:32:10,624 Are you kidding? This is probably the only chance 601 00:32:10,667 --> 00:32:13,801 I'll ever be invited to a Hollywood premiere. I'm not going to miss it. 602 00:32:13,844 --> 00:32:14,933 -The only thing is-- -You don't have a suit. 603 00:32:16,760 --> 00:32:19,024 I barely have any clothes without an S on them. 604 00:32:19,067 --> 00:32:22,288 I thought we might run into this predicament. 605 00:32:22,331 --> 00:32:26,945 So I may or may not have taken some precautionary measures. 606 00:32:28,250 --> 00:32:31,993 Tailored exactly to your measurements. 607 00:32:32,037 --> 00:32:36,128 I think you'll find nothing but the best for my flutter bum. 608 00:32:36,171 --> 00:32:36,998 Yowza. 609 00:32:40,132 --> 00:32:41,960 Are you absolutely sure you're not a teenage witch? 610 00:33:34,403 --> 00:33:35,970 [camera shutters clicking] 611 00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:53,727 [all clapping] 612 00:34:07,610 --> 00:34:09,612 [Josie] Who's that sourpuss? 613 00:34:09,656 --> 00:34:13,442 He's a notoriously surly but also highly influential movie critic 614 00:34:13,485 --> 00:34:14,574 from the WABE Journal. 615 00:34:15,270 --> 00:34:16,750 Don't worry. 616 00:34:16,793 --> 00:34:19,056 You and your movie are undeniable. 617 00:34:21,581 --> 00:34:23,235 Here we go. 618 00:34:23,277 --> 00:34:25,585 -[music playing] -[audience applauding] 619 00:34:50,958 --> 00:34:53,699 What the hell is going on, you bozos? 620 00:34:53,743 --> 00:34:55,049 Film got hot and split. 621 00:34:55,092 --> 00:34:57,051 We need to splice it back together and rethread it. 622 00:34:57,094 --> 00:34:59,271 Have you snapped your caps? We're gonna lose them. 623 00:34:59,314 --> 00:35:00,707 -Who? -The audience, Kevin. 624 00:35:00,750 --> 00:35:02,883 The audience and the critics. 625 00:35:02,926 --> 00:35:04,667 The spell has been broken. 626 00:35:04,711 --> 00:35:07,105 You two are the worst projectionists in the world. 627 00:35:07,148 --> 00:35:09,107 You're fired, we're no longer friends. 628 00:35:09,150 --> 00:35:11,283 And from now on you'll be paying full price for movie tickets. 629 00:35:11,326 --> 00:35:13,850 Everyone, calm down. 630 00:35:13,894 --> 00:35:16,288 Once. I was mid performance in Greenwich Village when the club got raided by the fuzz. 631 00:35:16,331 --> 00:35:18,333 But I still managed to finish my performance. 632 00:35:18,377 --> 00:35:21,728 We will get through this if we don't fall apart. 633 00:35:21,771 --> 00:35:24,296 You two, how long will it take to splice my film back together? 634 00:35:24,339 --> 00:35:25,601 I don't know. Five minutes? 635 00:35:25,645 --> 00:35:27,864 Five minutes. 636 00:35:27,908 --> 00:35:30,476 There are half a dozen critics out there looking at their pocket watches, 637 00:35:30,519 --> 00:35:32,782 wondering if they can catch the next train out of Riverdale. 638 00:35:32,826 --> 00:35:34,436 [all clamoring] 639 00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:36,525 Hold your horses, folks. Where do you think you're going? 640 00:35:36,569 --> 00:35:39,441 All right. Now, why don't we sit down and enjoy the excitement? 641 00:35:39,485 --> 00:35:40,834 Well, they're fixing my film. 642 00:35:40,877 --> 00:35:42,314 How long would it take you to get a band together? 643 00:35:42,357 --> 00:35:45,143 Fangs is here. So I'd say about 60 seconds? 644 00:35:46,056 --> 00:35:47,493 Perfect. 645 00:35:47,536 --> 00:35:49,147 Then I'll buy these two the time they need 646 00:35:49,190 --> 00:35:50,496 to get my movie fixed and running again. 647 00:35:52,628 --> 00:35:56,154 [Veronica] Who says motion pictures are a frozen art form? 648 00:35:56,197 --> 00:36:01,420 While my associates are making Going Uptowneven more fabulous than before, 649 00:36:01,463 --> 00:36:03,726 here in the flesh, 650 00:36:03,770 --> 00:36:06,338 performing the film's title number, 651 00:36:06,381 --> 00:36:09,123 is Miss Josie McCoy. 652 00:36:10,559 --> 00:36:13,693 -[piano playing] -Gentlemen. 653 00:36:13,736 --> 00:36:17,349 ♪ You're looking at a female who has driven men ♪ 654 00:36:17,392 --> 00:36:21,701 ♪ To homicide ♪ 655 00:36:21,744 --> 00:36:24,443 ♪ "How?" must you ask? ♪ 656 00:36:24,486 --> 00:36:28,273 ♪ Look at these Beautiful legs ♪ 657 00:36:28,316 --> 00:36:34,235 ♪ These legs were built To drive men mad ♪ 658 00:36:34,279 --> 00:36:37,195 ♪ Would you like to dance? ♪ 659 00:36:42,243 --> 00:36:45,464 When you look around the room, look. Tell me, what do you see? 660 00:36:45,507 --> 00:36:48,249 Imitations of imitations. 661 00:36:48,293 --> 00:36:52,601 I invented myself. 662 00:36:52,645 --> 00:36:59,913 ♪ I'm a creature who Sacrificed love for her art ♪ 663 00:36:59,956 --> 00:37:02,698 ♪ Why, you may ask ♪ 664 00:37:03,830 --> 00:37:07,007 ♪ With these smoldering lips ♪ 665 00:37:07,050 --> 00:37:11,272 ♪ Do you know what it's like to Taste such smoldering lips? ♪ 666 00:37:13,622 --> 00:37:17,496 ♪ Would you like to find out? ♪ 667 00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:21,587 ♪ But first Are you going uptown? ♪ 668 00:37:21,630 --> 00:37:23,371 ♪ Let's go You lead ♪ 669 00:37:23,415 --> 00:37:25,286 ♪ I'm ready for the big time ♪ 670 00:37:25,330 --> 00:37:28,855 ♪ But what I need, I need I need ♪ 671 00:37:28,898 --> 00:37:35,644 ♪ To return to the place Where I used to belong ♪ 672 00:37:38,995 --> 00:37:43,435 ♪ I hear you're going uptown ♪ 673 00:37:45,175 --> 00:37:46,829 ♪ I hear you're taking me ♪ 674 00:37:46,873 --> 00:37:48,614 ♪ You're taking me ♪ 675 00:37:48,657 --> 00:37:55,403 ♪ You're taking me along ♪ 676 00:37:56,274 --> 00:37:57,840 [audience cheering] 677 00:38:09,983 --> 00:38:10,897 [film score resumes] 678 00:38:21,386 --> 00:38:23,910 I just saw Mr. Abrams off. 679 00:38:23,953 --> 00:38:26,216 He's on the train back to New York. 680 00:38:26,260 --> 00:38:30,003 And? Is it going to be a rave or not? 681 00:38:30,046 --> 00:38:32,397 Now, Josie, you know these critics. 682 00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:35,617 But I may have greased his wheels a bit, 683 00:38:35,661 --> 00:38:37,880 and gotten a taste of what he's going to publish in the journal. 684 00:38:37,924 --> 00:38:38,838 Let's hear it. 685 00:38:41,536 --> 00:38:43,582 First, the headline. 686 00:38:43,625 --> 00:38:45,410 [clears throat] "A star is born." 687 00:38:45,453 --> 00:38:47,499 [chuckles] 688 00:38:47,542 --> 00:38:49,414 Would you like to hear the opening paragraph? 689 00:38:49,457 --> 00:38:50,328 Why not? 690 00:38:52,504 --> 00:38:54,462 "Stop the presses. 691 00:38:54,506 --> 00:38:58,031 An atomic bomb exploded in Riverdale. 692 00:38:58,074 --> 00:39:01,904 People will be talking about it for the rest of their days. 693 00:39:01,948 --> 00:39:05,038 Call the Oscars and tell them that all of the major awards 694 00:39:05,081 --> 00:39:07,910 will be going to Josie McCoy this year. 695 00:39:07,954 --> 00:39:13,525 Miss McCoy, the genius creative force and I do mean force, behind Going Uptown, 696 00:39:13,568 --> 00:39:18,660 has not only earned herself a seat at the glorious table that is Tinseltown. 697 00:39:18,704 --> 00:39:22,316 She has commandeered the whole damn restaurant." 698 00:39:30,063 --> 00:39:31,717 This is really happening. 699 00:39:31,760 --> 00:39:33,153 I'm not dreaming. 700 00:39:33,196 --> 00:39:34,459 [Veronica] Josie, it's not happening. 701 00:39:35,982 --> 00:39:39,551 It happened. You made it happen. 702 00:39:39,594 --> 00:39:42,292 And as far as I'm concerned, you put Riverdale and the Babylonium 703 00:39:42,336 --> 00:39:45,165 on the map tonight, so thank you for that. 704 00:39:45,208 --> 00:39:47,950 And by the way, there's one thing this reviewer got wrong. 705 00:39:49,169 --> 00:39:51,563 A star wasn't born tonight. 706 00:39:51,606 --> 00:39:53,173 You've always been a star, Josie. 707 00:39:55,175 --> 00:39:57,003 From the first second you drew breath. 708 00:39:58,134 --> 00:39:59,745 You weren't even at the hospital. 709 00:39:59,788 --> 00:40:01,399 [chuckles] 710 00:40:01,442 --> 00:40:02,574 You're not wrong though. 711 00:40:03,966 --> 00:40:06,099 We make a good team, you and I. 712 00:40:06,142 --> 00:40:08,797 Perhaps we should do this again. 713 00:40:08,841 --> 00:40:12,801 I wonder, Veronica, if you're not just treading water here, 714 00:40:12,845 --> 00:40:15,413 managing a theater when what you should be doing is making movies. 715 00:40:17,502 --> 00:40:22,985 -Uh-huh. I see I've intrigued you. -[Veronica chuckles] 716 00:40:23,029 --> 00:40:24,422 That's what Josie McCoy does best. 717 00:40:31,254 --> 00:40:33,605 [Archie] Uncle Frank, what's going on? 718 00:40:35,302 --> 00:40:36,521 Reggie, will you give us a minute? 719 00:40:41,177 --> 00:40:42,048 What the hell is this? 720 00:40:44,267 --> 00:40:50,360 Mrs. Grundy asked us to write about our most personal and private pain. 721 00:40:53,668 --> 00:40:57,542 "Overseas or in mountain marsh, that's where you really are. 722 00:40:57,585 --> 00:40:59,152 You have a plot of land here at home, 723 00:41:01,894 --> 00:41:04,374 but you will always be lost to me over there." 724 00:41:04,418 --> 00:41:07,029 Writing poetry to get with the girl is fine. I said that. 725 00:41:08,988 --> 00:41:10,555 But writing about your father? 726 00:41:10,598 --> 00:41:14,080 Exploiting his sacrifice for our country, for our family? 727 00:41:15,516 --> 00:41:17,475 No. 728 00:41:17,518 --> 00:41:21,261 No! You will not sully his memory like this. 729 00:41:21,304 --> 00:41:23,089 What's wrong with me writing about my dad? 730 00:41:23,132 --> 00:41:25,134 I mean, I wish I could still talk to him, but I can't. 731 00:41:25,178 --> 00:41:26,048 At least this way... 732 00:41:26,919 --> 00:41:29,617 Uncle Frank, stop! 733 00:41:29,661 --> 00:41:34,056 Don't you ever write about your father like that again. 734 00:41:36,624 --> 00:41:37,973 Am I understood? 735 00:41:48,723 --> 00:41:49,507 [bell chimes]