1 00:00:01,789 --> 00:00:03,156 Thanks to Anna-Kat 2 00:00:03,219 --> 00:00:05,000 selling the most cookies and winning this trip, 3 00:00:05,054 --> 00:00:06,124 tomorrow, we'll be eating breakfast 4 00:00:06,201 --> 00:00:07,267 in Hollywood, California. 5 00:00:07,313 --> 00:00:09,584 It's our first real vacation. It's gonna be awesome. 6 00:00:09,662 --> 00:00:12,528 Sunshine, beaches, celebrity sightings, no laundry. 7 00:00:12,646 --> 00:00:14,383 If you run out of underwear, you ride dirty. 8 00:00:14,459 --> 00:00:16,192 This vacation is gonna be so much better 9 00:00:16,294 --> 00:00:19,293 than our usual trip to colonial Crapsburg. 10 00:00:19,348 --> 00:00:22,238 And Valley Forge! Don't forget, you guys hated that, too. 11 00:00:22,371 --> 00:00:23,566 And while we're in California, 12 00:00:23,635 --> 00:00:25,317 we're gonna be celebrating your birthday... the big 4-0. 13 00:00:25,402 --> 00:00:26,965 We're not gonna make a big deal about my birthday. 14 00:00:27,003 --> 00:00:28,136 It's a day like any other day, 15 00:00:28,207 --> 00:00:29,910 so I don't want to be treated any differently. 16 00:00:29,980 --> 00:00:32,182 - You hear me? - I hear you. No special treatment. 17 00:00:32,277 --> 00:00:33,614 Now go help the kids finish packing. 18 00:00:33,668 --> 00:00:35,061 I'm gonna go meet Doris and Angela. 19 00:00:35,124 --> 00:00:36,156 You're going out now? 20 00:00:36,181 --> 00:00:37,592 There's still so much to do before we leave. 21 00:00:37,671 --> 00:00:40,305 How can you give me a hard time about this? 22 00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:41,499 It's my birthday. 23 00:00:43,469 --> 00:00:46,504 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 24 00:00:50,577 --> 00:00:51,762 Did you remember to pack everything? 25 00:00:51,821 --> 00:00:53,288 Swimsuits? Toiletries? Hats? 26 00:00:53,348 --> 00:00:55,004 Nope, nope, and nope. 27 00:00:55,043 --> 00:00:56,076 Then what have you got in here? 28 00:00:58,787 --> 00:01:01,922 "The Big Finish: Rich, Famous, and How They Died." 29 00:01:02,024 --> 00:01:04,465 I want to go to the Hollywood Walk of Fame 30 00:01:04,512 --> 00:01:06,801 and find all the celebrities that died horrible deaths. 31 00:01:06,887 --> 00:01:09,848 Murder, drugs, the occasional yacht mishap. 32 00:01:09,926 --> 00:01:11,458 Hollywood, baby. 33 00:01:11,544 --> 00:01:12,832 Taylor, could you come in here? 34 00:01:14,970 --> 00:01:16,087 Please help your sister pack. 35 00:01:16,138 --> 00:01:17,947 Why do I always have to take care of her? 36 00:01:17,994 --> 00:01:20,525 Because the older sister takes care of the younger sister. 37 00:01:20,587 --> 00:01:21,962 It's been that way for hundreds of years. 38 00:01:22,017 --> 00:01:23,443 You know, back in colonial days, 39 00:01:23,545 --> 00:01:25,812 - the eldest... - Oh, my God. Enough! I'll do it! 40 00:01:25,904 --> 00:01:28,381 Anna-Kat, I need you to make room in your bag for this. 41 00:01:28,483 --> 00:01:29,783 It's Mom's birthday gift. 42 00:01:29,885 --> 00:01:31,217 I can't pack it with our stuff. She'll find it. 43 00:01:31,320 --> 00:01:32,385 I'll try to fit it in. 44 00:01:33,422 --> 00:01:35,622 You know, you don't need to take your pillow. 45 00:01:35,724 --> 00:01:37,023 They have them at the hotel. 46 00:01:37,125 --> 00:01:38,758 Did you know that after two years, 47 00:01:38,860 --> 00:01:41,127 hotel pillows are mostly dead skin cells? 48 00:01:42,431 --> 00:01:44,097 I'm gonna go pack my pillow. 49 00:01:45,367 --> 00:01:47,634 The best part about flying west is you gain three hours. 50 00:01:47,736 --> 00:01:48,568 You'll get there by lunch. 51 00:01:48,670 --> 00:01:49,803 I don't know about that. 52 00:01:49,905 --> 00:01:51,504 We have a long layover in Dallas. 53 00:01:51,606 --> 00:01:52,906 So change your tickets to nonstop. 54 00:01:53,008 --> 00:01:54,107 And first class. 55 00:01:54,209 --> 00:01:55,241 And make it Monaco. 56 00:01:55,344 --> 00:01:57,143 We can't just change the tickets. 57 00:01:57,245 --> 00:01:58,445 We won this trip. 58 00:01:58,547 --> 00:01:59,946 We have to take what they give us. 59 00:02:00,048 --> 00:02:01,548 They can't tell you what to do. 60 00:02:01,650 --> 00:02:03,616 Last time I checked, this was still America. 61 00:02:03,719 --> 00:02:05,318 You know regular people 62 00:02:05,420 --> 00:02:07,420 can't just switch flights whenever they want. 63 00:02:07,522 --> 00:02:08,855 It's actually the first time 64 00:02:08,957 --> 00:02:10,690 my family's taken a plane to a vacation, 65 00:02:10,792 --> 00:02:11,858 so don't ruin this for me. 66 00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:14,214 All right, I hear you. I was totally out of line. 67 00:02:15,297 --> 00:02:16,663 But you've, like, been to Monaco, right? 68 00:02:17,933 --> 00:02:20,100 You just don't get anything about me or my reality. 69 00:02:20,168 --> 00:02:21,735 I don't feel seen or known by you. 70 00:02:21,837 --> 00:02:23,403 "Seen or known"? 71 00:02:23,505 --> 00:02:25,972 Working at Teen Help Line's made you super emo, dude. 72 00:02:25,997 --> 00:02:27,058 Oh, yeah. 73 00:02:27,083 --> 00:02:28,842 You know, this vacation's come at a perfect time. 74 00:02:28,944 --> 00:02:30,143 I need a break from you. 75 00:02:30,245 --> 00:02:31,945 Well, did you ever stop and think 76 00:02:32,013 --> 00:02:33,313 I need a break from you, too? 77 00:02:33,415 --> 00:02:34,714 Great. 78 00:02:34,816 --> 00:02:37,550 - Uno, dos, tres, cuatro... - What are you doing? 79 00:02:37,652 --> 00:02:39,853 Stopping myself from saying something I might regret. 80 00:02:39,921 --> 00:02:41,888 No, say it. 81 00:02:41,957 --> 00:02:44,457 You can't pull off that belt. 82 00:02:44,559 --> 00:02:46,526 Get... out. 83 00:02:53,935 --> 00:02:55,335 This is from me and Doris. 84 00:02:55,437 --> 00:02:56,970 Happy 40th, honey. 85 00:02:57,072 --> 00:02:59,072 - Thank you. - Just promise not to open it 86 00:02:59,174 --> 00:03:00,546 - until the night of your birthday. - Mm-hmm. 87 00:03:00,616 --> 00:03:02,142 So, 40. 88 00:03:02,167 --> 00:03:03,179 How you dealing with that? 89 00:03:03,210 --> 00:03:04,577 I don't care about 40. Bring it on. 90 00:03:04,646 --> 00:03:06,279 It's just one step closer to 48, 91 00:03:06,348 --> 00:03:08,848 when the last kid is finally out of the house. 92 00:03:08,917 --> 00:03:11,133 Then it'll be Katie time all the time. 93 00:03:11,161 --> 00:03:12,435 What about Greg? 94 00:03:12,537 --> 00:03:15,105 By then, he'll probably have, like... a train set? 95 00:03:16,675 --> 00:03:18,408 What are you guys gonna do in L.A.? 96 00:03:18,510 --> 00:03:20,176 I want to go to that restaurant PUMP 97 00:03:20,245 --> 00:03:22,078 and meet Lisa Vanderpump from "Real Housewives." 98 00:03:22,180 --> 00:03:23,279 - Mm-hmm. - Oh, yeah. 99 00:03:23,382 --> 00:03:26,000 LVP rules! She is the best of the H-wives. 100 00:03:26,025 --> 00:03:27,088 - Mm-hmm. - She's British, 101 00:03:27,113 --> 00:03:28,066 so when she calls you a whore, 102 00:03:28,091 --> 00:03:29,007 it sounds polite. 103 00:03:29,032 --> 00:03:30,787 And then we'll do whatever vacation stuff 104 00:03:30,856 --> 00:03:32,122 everybody else wants to do. 105 00:03:32,224 --> 00:03:34,424 I hate to break it to you, but you ain't going on vacation. 106 00:03:34,526 --> 00:03:36,326 You're going on a family trip. 107 00:03:36,395 --> 00:03:37,594 What's the difference? 108 00:03:37,696 --> 00:03:40,563 A vacation is when you do what makes you happy. 109 00:03:40,665 --> 00:03:44,701 A family trip is when you drag your kids all over the place, 110 00:03:44,803 --> 00:03:47,470 everyone is arguing about where to go and what to do, 111 00:03:47,572 --> 00:03:48,671 and by the end, 112 00:03:48,774 --> 00:03:50,907 you realize that your friend who chose to stay single 113 00:03:51,009 --> 00:03:52,342 was actually right. 114 00:03:52,411 --> 00:03:54,477 Okay, don't listen to her, Katie. 115 00:03:54,579 --> 00:03:56,379 This trip is for everyone. 116 00:03:56,481 --> 00:03:58,481 This is also the first time your family's traveling 117 00:03:58,583 --> 00:04:00,316 to a place where no one's wearing a bonnet. 118 00:04:00,419 --> 00:04:01,584 Crapsburg! 119 00:04:01,653 --> 00:04:04,220 My advice... ditch the kids and do what you want to do. 120 00:04:04,322 --> 00:04:07,657 Take a vacation, Katie, not a family trip. 121 00:04:07,759 --> 00:04:09,025 I can do both. 122 00:04:09,127 --> 00:04:10,527 Oh! That's what Angela said 123 00:04:10,595 --> 00:04:12,529 when she was dating those two women at once. 124 00:04:12,631 --> 00:04:13,630 How'd that turn out? 125 00:04:15,167 --> 00:04:16,800 One's in a coma... 126 00:04:16,868 --> 00:04:18,635 and the other one's in jail. 127 00:04:18,737 --> 00:04:20,570 That's on Angela. 128 00:04:20,672 --> 00:04:22,071 I got this. 129 00:04:36,288 --> 00:04:37,253 Ah! 130 00:04:37,355 --> 00:04:38,254 I'm gonna go check us in. 131 00:04:38,356 --> 00:04:39,722 - Wow! - Whoa! 132 00:04:39,825 --> 00:04:41,691 Oh, my gosh. 133 00:04:41,793 --> 00:04:43,259 This is awesome! 134 00:04:43,361 --> 00:04:44,461 This is the first time 135 00:04:44,563 --> 00:04:46,396 we've stayed anywhere with an actual lobby. 136 00:04:46,498 --> 00:04:48,631 And I'm not worried we're gonna be murdered here tonight. 137 00:04:48,733 --> 00:04:50,166 There's a complimentary continental breakfast 138 00:04:50,268 --> 00:04:51,901 on the mezzanine level between 8:00 and 10:00! 139 00:04:52,003 --> 00:04:53,570 You know what that means, kids. 140 00:04:53,638 --> 00:04:56,673 Load up our pockets with muffins. 141 00:04:58,910 --> 00:05:00,109 Cooper? 142 00:05:00,212 --> 00:05:01,444 What are you doing here? 143 00:05:01,546 --> 00:05:03,213 I don't like to go to bed angry. 144 00:05:03,315 --> 00:05:04,914 I took my jet here so we could talk. 145 00:05:05,016 --> 00:05:06,883 Huh. Must be nice. 146 00:05:06,985 --> 00:05:08,551 This place is pretty cool. 147 00:05:08,653 --> 00:05:10,553 Yeah, the Ottos are finally doing it right. 148 00:05:10,622 --> 00:05:12,222 But it's not on the beach. 149 00:05:12,324 --> 00:05:13,223 You know what you got to do? 150 00:05:13,325 --> 00:05:15,058 Rent yourself a place in Malibu. 151 00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:16,659 I can't afford that. 152 00:05:16,761 --> 00:05:18,628 Sure you can! It's just the 'Bu. 153 00:05:18,730 --> 00:05:19,963 - You just don't get it. - What? 154 00:05:20,065 --> 00:05:22,932 You keep suggesting things that I can't do. 155 00:05:23,001 --> 00:05:25,668 And it's embarrassing to keep saying, "I can't do that." 156 00:05:25,770 --> 00:05:28,471 I'm 12 hours away from stuffing muffins in my pockets. 157 00:05:28,573 --> 00:05:29,839 You know what? 158 00:05:29,941 --> 00:05:32,056 I really want to understand what's going on with you. 159 00:05:32,157 --> 00:05:33,417 Okay. 160 00:05:33,512 --> 00:05:35,111 Tomorrow, let's go out in L.A. 161 00:05:35,180 --> 00:05:37,514 I'll show you what it feels like to be me. 162 00:05:37,616 --> 00:05:39,382 The bottles of water on the nightstand are free! 163 00:05:39,451 --> 00:05:40,750 But don't touch the big FIJI. 164 00:05:44,222 --> 00:05:45,255 We have a rain shower. 165 00:05:45,357 --> 00:05:46,556 That's nice. 166 00:05:46,658 --> 00:05:48,992 And a toilet that flushes different for ones and twos. 167 00:05:49,094 --> 00:05:50,426 That's great. 168 00:05:52,264 --> 00:05:53,563 What are you watching? 169 00:05:53,665 --> 00:05:57,233 I hired Maria to stay at the house and take care of Luthor. 170 00:05:57,302 --> 00:05:59,035 We have a camera in the living room? 171 00:05:59,137 --> 00:06:00,603 Yeah, we put it in to spy on Taylor 172 00:06:00,705 --> 00:06:01,804 when she first started dating Trip. 173 00:06:01,907 --> 00:06:03,936 - What?! Oh, my God! - Relax! 174 00:06:04,006 --> 00:06:05,642 We stopped watching after the 15th time 175 00:06:05,710 --> 00:06:08,211 you guys tried to play "Clue" and couldn't figure it out. 176 00:06:09,447 --> 00:06:11,209 Principal Ablin? 177 00:06:14,019 --> 00:06:15,685 - Ewwwww! - Oh. Oh, no. 178 00:06:15,787 --> 00:06:17,420 I told Maria no boys! 179 00:06:17,522 --> 00:06:18,788 Okay, here's what we're doing tomorrow. 180 00:06:18,857 --> 00:06:20,690 We're all meeting up with Cooper in Beverly Hills... 181 00:06:20,792 --> 00:06:23,092 No! I want to go to the wax museum and Venice Beach! 182 00:06:23,194 --> 00:06:24,327 I want to see the Walk of Fame! 183 00:06:24,529 --> 00:06:26,029 I want to see the Michelangelo exhibit at the Getty. 184 00:06:26,131 --> 00:06:27,764 Great, great, great. We're not doing any of that. 185 00:06:27,866 --> 00:06:29,032 We're going to go to PUMP 186 00:06:29,134 --> 00:06:31,234 so that I can try to see the queen, Lisa Vanderpump. 187 00:06:31,336 --> 00:06:32,602 But I promised Cooper I'd meet him! 188 00:06:32,704 --> 00:06:35,238 No one would be here if I hadn't won this trip! 189 00:06:35,340 --> 00:06:36,973 I want to see the Specific Ocean! 190 00:06:42,247 --> 00:06:44,480 I'm the one reason that everybody is here... 191 00:06:44,583 --> 00:06:46,830 Do what you want... Not a vacation... 192 00:06:46,885 --> 00:06:48,235 Ditch the kids... 193 00:06:48,298 --> 00:06:50,235 Why is there so much melon in this fruit cup? 194 00:06:50,290 --> 00:06:52,088 Stop! 195 00:06:52,190 --> 00:06:53,356 Here's the deal... 196 00:06:53,458 --> 00:06:56,593 tomorrow, everyone is free to do whatever they want. 197 00:06:56,695 --> 00:06:57,727 Really? 198 00:06:57,829 --> 00:06:59,028 It will be nice going to a museum 199 00:06:59,130 --> 00:07:01,070 without your mom saying, "Big whoop, I could do that," 200 00:07:01,137 --> 00:07:02,236 after every painting. 201 00:07:02,289 --> 00:07:04,336 Sorry, nerd. Birthday. You're coming with me. 202 00:07:04,399 --> 00:07:06,306 So, we're on our own tomorrow? 203 00:07:06,344 --> 00:07:09,172 Yes. And then we can all have dinner together for my birthday. 204 00:07:09,274 --> 00:07:12,442 It's official... this is no longer a family trip. 205 00:07:12,544 --> 00:07:14,088 We're on vacation! 206 00:07:15,012 --> 00:07:15,851 See you then. 207 00:07:18,992 --> 00:07:20,400 Don't even think about it. 208 00:07:20,462 --> 00:07:21,628 Okay, guys, listen up... 209 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:23,407 keep your cellphones handy in case we need to reach you. 210 00:07:23,470 --> 00:07:25,337 Unless you got diabetes overnight 211 00:07:25,439 --> 00:07:26,605 and it's for your insulin, 212 00:07:26,707 --> 00:07:28,607 that fanny pack is unacceptable. 213 00:07:28,709 --> 00:07:30,742 Cooper's downstairs. I'm gonna go meet him. 214 00:07:30,811 --> 00:07:33,078 I also have a money belt for my most irreplaceable items. 215 00:07:33,147 --> 00:07:34,279 Like your lip balm? 216 00:07:34,381 --> 00:07:36,648 It's actually nipple cream for nursing mothers. 217 00:07:36,717 --> 00:07:38,750 It's the only thing that keeps these babies from cracking. 218 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:42,421 People say Van Gogh cut off his ear because of a woman, 219 00:07:42,523 --> 00:07:44,456 but I'm pretty sure it's because his dad said the words 220 00:07:44,558 --> 00:07:46,158 "nipple cream." 221 00:07:46,260 --> 00:07:48,527 Okay, you two... sun block. 222 00:07:50,497 --> 00:07:51,430 I want you to watch 223 00:07:51,532 --> 00:07:53,298 the "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" 224 00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:54,766 season nine reunion show 225 00:07:54,835 --> 00:07:57,502 so that you can realize, "A," it's fantastic, 226 00:07:57,571 --> 00:08:00,539 and "B," there's crazier out there than what you married. 227 00:08:01,708 --> 00:08:03,475 How can you watch that garbage? 228 00:08:03,544 --> 00:08:05,043 Interesting. 229 00:08:05,145 --> 00:08:07,279 I seem to remember the head of the school recycling committee 230 00:08:07,381 --> 00:08:11,083 saying that we need to, quote, "rethink garbage." 231 00:08:13,587 --> 00:08:14,795 That's out of context. 232 00:08:17,091 --> 00:08:18,944 Fun fact... in 1932, 233 00:08:19,022 --> 00:08:20,892 actress Peg Entwistle committed suicide 234 00:08:20,961 --> 00:08:23,095 by jumping off the "H" in the Hollywood sign. 235 00:08:23,163 --> 00:08:24,896 The "H" in Hollywood or the "H" in sign? 236 00:08:24,965 --> 00:08:26,064 Taylor. 237 00:08:27,634 --> 00:08:29,267 When you and your sister walk to Hollywood Boulevard, 238 00:08:29,336 --> 00:08:30,869 you need to keep an eye on her at all times. 239 00:08:30,971 --> 00:08:33,071 Great! So once again, I'm stuck looking after Anna-Kat. 240 00:08:33,173 --> 00:08:34,806 Maybe you can use this as an opportunity 241 00:08:34,908 --> 00:08:36,608 to cross another thing off your life-skills list. 242 00:08:36,710 --> 00:08:37,709 Like what? 243 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:42,581 52... Keep a plant alive. 244 00:08:42,683 --> 00:08:44,049 That's close enough. 245 00:08:44,118 --> 00:08:45,417 Oh, my God. 246 00:08:49,356 --> 00:08:51,323 Mom's present! 247 00:08:51,391 --> 00:08:54,126 It's broken! How did this happen? 248 00:09:00,801 --> 00:09:02,033 Look, I'm a kid. 249 00:09:02,136 --> 00:09:03,835 You give me bubble wrap, I'mma pop it. 250 00:09:03,937 --> 00:09:07,405 You guys need to get this re-framed by dinner tonight. 251 00:09:07,474 --> 00:09:08,840 Why do we have to get it fixed?! 252 00:09:08,909 --> 00:09:09,708 Because you broke it. 253 00:09:09,810 --> 00:09:11,009 Anna-Kat broke it! 254 00:09:11,078 --> 00:09:13,145 How could I break it? I'm a plant. 255 00:09:13,213 --> 00:09:14,379 Just fix it. 256 00:09:15,582 --> 00:09:17,482 We have three hours until the frame is fixed, 257 00:09:17,551 --> 00:09:19,384 so we'll do the Walk of Fame first and then the wax museum. 258 00:09:19,453 --> 00:09:21,119 Look... Marilyn Monroe. 259 00:09:21,221 --> 00:09:22,721 She lived a really sad life. 260 00:09:22,823 --> 00:09:24,256 She grew up an orphan. 261 00:09:24,324 --> 00:09:26,825 And I'm sure she died in a super depressing way. 262 00:09:26,927 --> 00:09:28,393 Yeah. Drug overdose. 263 00:09:28,462 --> 00:09:30,896 At least that's what the Kennedys want you to think. 264 00:09:31,765 --> 00:09:33,431 See? They're fine. 265 00:09:33,534 --> 00:09:35,333 I know. I just worry about them. 266 00:09:35,365 --> 00:09:36,378 Me too. 267 00:09:36,403 --> 00:09:37,469 But this is a vacation, 268 00:09:37,571 --> 00:09:39,004 and we're doing stuff that we want to do. 269 00:09:39,106 --> 00:09:40,539 - Stuff you want to do. - Same thing. 270 00:09:40,641 --> 00:09:41,740 And the only way to do that 271 00:09:41,842 --> 00:09:43,608 is to trust the kids to take care of themselves, 272 00:09:43,710 --> 00:09:45,310 which they're clearly doing. 273 00:09:45,379 --> 00:09:47,179 You just need to find a way to relax. 274 00:09:47,281 --> 00:09:48,914 Oh, I could use my new meditation app. 275 00:09:49,016 --> 00:09:50,248 My cellphone is readily accessible 276 00:09:50,350 --> 00:09:51,616 right here in my convenient fanny pack. 277 00:09:53,787 --> 00:09:58,390 Or we could relax California style. 278 00:09:58,492 --> 00:09:59,691 Oh, I don't know. 279 00:09:59,793 --> 00:10:01,326 What? It's legal here. 280 00:10:01,395 --> 00:10:03,528 And it's not like you've never done it before. 281 00:10:03,597 --> 00:10:05,497 Okay, remember when I told you 282 00:10:05,599 --> 00:10:07,432 - I partied a lot in high school? - Yeah. 283 00:10:07,501 --> 00:10:10,235 Replace "partied" with "learned calligraphy in my basement." 284 00:10:10,337 --> 00:10:12,137 Don't worry. I'll be with you. 285 00:10:12,239 --> 00:10:13,505 They didn't nickname me 286 00:10:13,607 --> 00:10:16,441 Katie "Dank-Nasty Bong-MacGyver Babylon" for nothing. 287 00:10:29,189 --> 00:10:30,222 If you're gonna understand me, 288 00:10:30,324 --> 00:10:32,090 you need to live within my limitations. 289 00:10:32,192 --> 00:10:33,625 So I'm giving you $20. 290 00:10:33,727 --> 00:10:34,826 That's all you have to spend. 291 00:10:34,928 --> 00:10:36,161 Piece of cake! 292 00:10:38,065 --> 00:10:39,364 That's really nice. 293 00:10:39,433 --> 00:10:40,465 Sure is. 294 00:10:40,567 --> 00:10:41,766 I think I'm gonna get one in white. 295 00:10:41,835 --> 00:10:43,368 Ah, you want it, but you can't have it, 296 00:10:43,470 --> 00:10:46,071 because that sweater definitely costs more than $20. 297 00:10:46,173 --> 00:10:48,506 I was talking about the Lamborghini. 298 00:10:49,409 --> 00:10:51,343 But I do like that sweater. 299 00:10:51,411 --> 00:10:53,645 Aw, I'm sorry. You can't afford it. 300 00:10:53,714 --> 00:10:55,146 It costs at least 3 grand. 301 00:10:55,249 --> 00:10:57,649 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 302 00:10:57,674 --> 00:10:58,940 You know what? I'm gonna get it. 303 00:10:59,008 --> 00:11:00,389 I can't. I'm done. 304 00:11:07,728 --> 00:11:09,667 Pot store was a lot nicer than I thought it would be. 305 00:11:09,737 --> 00:11:10,895 - And very educational. - Mm-hmm. 306 00:11:10,998 --> 00:11:12,264 The gentleman at the front told me 307 00:11:12,332 --> 00:11:13,932 that when you want to smoke, you look at your watch 308 00:11:14,034 --> 00:11:16,201 and say, "Hey now, it's blunt o'clock." 309 00:11:17,371 --> 00:11:19,738 It's been half an hour since we took the gummies. 310 00:11:19,806 --> 00:11:21,773 - Mm. - You feel anything yet? 311 00:11:21,875 --> 00:11:23,008 No. 312 00:11:23,110 --> 00:11:24,376 Maybe we should take another one. 313 00:11:24,478 --> 00:11:25,510 Let's give it a sec. 314 00:11:25,612 --> 00:11:26,645 Mm. 315 00:11:40,394 --> 00:11:42,360 - Do you really like being an Uber driver? - So, how long have you been doing it? 316 00:11:42,429 --> 00:11:44,134 - Is it the best thing ever? - Is it... I mean, do you see guys all the time? 317 00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:45,864 - Do you see so many people? - Just would be so weird! 318 00:11:45,932 --> 00:11:47,290 - Do you have a gun? - But it's amazing. Oh, my God. 319 00:11:47,334 --> 00:11:48,602 I want to be an Uber driver all of a sudden. 320 00:11:48,635 --> 00:11:50,139 Have you punched people? 321 00:11:57,010 --> 00:11:58,710 What a great fight. 322 00:11:58,812 --> 00:12:01,872 See?! Reality TV is the best! 323 00:12:01,950 --> 00:12:03,200 The best! 324 00:12:03,278 --> 00:12:06,294 I've wasted so much time watching Ken Burns. 325 00:12:06,318 --> 00:12:08,486 I know. We're free, Greg! 326 00:12:08,588 --> 00:12:09,788 We're at the place in our life 327 00:12:09,856 --> 00:12:11,656 where the kids hardly even need us anymore. 328 00:12:11,758 --> 00:12:13,525 We made it! 329 00:12:13,627 --> 00:12:15,727 Cut your own damn crusts off, kids! 330 00:12:15,829 --> 00:12:16,728 - Yeah! - Yeah! 331 00:12:16,830 --> 00:12:18,563 Find your own damn shoes! 332 00:12:18,665 --> 00:12:21,199 Yeah, shoes your own damn crust! 333 00:12:21,301 --> 00:12:23,134 What? 334 00:12:29,009 --> 00:12:30,809 Hey, look! Lana Turner! 335 00:12:30,911 --> 00:12:32,777 Her daughter murdered her Mafia boyfriend, 336 00:12:32,879 --> 00:12:34,446 and the studio covered it up. 337 00:12:34,514 --> 00:12:36,181 They don't do business like that anymore. 338 00:12:36,283 --> 00:12:37,215 It's all so corporate. 339 00:12:37,317 --> 00:12:38,383 Yes. Okay. 340 00:12:38,485 --> 00:12:39,751 All right. 341 00:12:39,820 --> 00:12:41,186 - Okay, let's try it again. - Oh! 342 00:12:41,288 --> 00:12:42,854 Which shell has the pea? 343 00:12:42,923 --> 00:12:45,323 Anna-Kat, I saw that woman win twice in a row, 344 00:12:45,392 --> 00:12:47,058 and I spotted the ball every time. 345 00:12:47,160 --> 00:12:48,960 I could double the money Dad gave us. 346 00:12:49,062 --> 00:12:51,778 - These things are scams. - Yeah, you're right. 347 00:12:52,599 --> 00:12:53,965 Yes! 348 00:12:54,067 --> 00:12:55,633 I'm getting killed out here. 349 00:12:55,736 --> 00:12:57,268 Might just pack it up. 350 00:12:57,371 --> 00:12:58,570 I'll do it! 351 00:13:01,441 --> 00:13:02,607 Okay. 352 00:13:02,676 --> 00:13:04,409 You know where the pea is not, you know where the pea is. 353 00:13:04,511 --> 00:13:07,746 Keep your eye on the shell that has the pea. 354 00:13:07,848 --> 00:13:10,048 - What shell has the pea? - That one. 355 00:13:10,150 --> 00:13:11,282 So sorry. 356 00:13:11,351 --> 00:13:13,351 It's not there. It's over here. 357 00:13:13,453 --> 00:13:14,586 What?! 358 00:13:14,688 --> 00:13:17,088 No! I swear, it was there! 359 00:13:19,059 --> 00:13:20,425 They were in on it together. 360 00:13:20,527 --> 00:13:22,093 They set you up. 361 00:13:22,195 --> 00:13:23,862 I'm so screwed. 362 00:13:25,365 --> 00:13:27,332 Wonder Woman! I need your help! 363 00:13:27,434 --> 00:13:29,367 They stole my money! You need to stop them! 364 00:13:29,469 --> 00:13:30,769 I'll do it for $5. 365 00:13:30,854 --> 00:13:32,654 Taylor, don't give her the... 366 00:13:32,756 --> 00:13:35,523 W... She stole my money! 367 00:13:35,625 --> 00:13:37,867 Batman, there's been a crime! 368 00:13:37,961 --> 00:13:38,993 Batman! 369 00:13:40,964 --> 00:13:42,430 Here we go. 370 00:13:42,532 --> 00:13:44,466 I can't believe we're at PUMP. 371 00:13:44,568 --> 00:13:47,102 Lisa Vanderpump's my favorite housewife, 372 00:13:47,204 --> 00:13:48,937 and I finally get to meet her! 373 00:13:51,041 --> 00:13:52,574 Get out of the car, Greg. 374 00:14:05,756 --> 00:14:06,988 Wait. 375 00:14:07,090 --> 00:14:09,391 This isn't right. 376 00:14:09,493 --> 00:14:11,493 Oh, crap! 377 00:14:11,595 --> 00:14:12,861 I guess I was all gummied up 378 00:14:12,963 --> 00:14:16,164 and put the wrong PUMP into the Uber web-thing. 379 00:14:16,266 --> 00:14:18,032 Greg, call them to come back. 380 00:14:22,372 --> 00:14:23,738 My fanny pack! 381 00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:24,973 I left my fanny pack in the car. 382 00:14:25,075 --> 00:14:25,874 It's got all our stuff in it! 383 00:14:25,976 --> 00:14:28,309 We're stranded! 384 00:14:28,412 --> 00:14:29,511 - Aah! - Wait! 385 00:14:29,613 --> 00:14:30,845 What about your money belt? 386 00:14:34,050 --> 00:14:35,116 All that is in here 387 00:14:35,218 --> 00:14:37,852 is a pocket-size copy of the Constitution. 388 00:14:38,615 --> 00:14:41,122 People died to protect this document, Katie. 389 00:14:45,197 --> 00:14:46,848 - We need to call Oliver. - Yes. 390 00:14:46,924 --> 00:14:50,259 He is with Cooper, and Cooper has his driver. 391 00:14:50,328 --> 00:14:52,247 - We need to ask the guy in the station... - Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 392 00:14:52,330 --> 00:14:55,097 ...to use his phone. 393 00:14:55,199 --> 00:14:57,733 Do you know Oliver's number? 394 00:14:57,835 --> 00:14:59,101 Of course not. 395 00:14:59,203 --> 00:15:00,436 It's in my phone, 396 00:15:00,538 --> 00:15:03,747 which you insisted that I put in your convenient fanny pack. 397 00:15:03,841 --> 00:15:07,609 If we think hard enough, we'll remember it. 398 00:15:07,712 --> 00:15:10,245 - Oliver. - Mm-hmm. 399 00:15:10,348 --> 00:15:12,214 - Oliver. - Yes. 400 00:15:12,283 --> 00:15:14,783 Oliver Otto. 401 00:15:14,885 --> 00:15:16,151 Oliver Otto. 402 00:15:16,253 --> 00:15:17,786 - That's fun to say. - Mm-hmm. 403 00:15:17,888 --> 00:15:20,222 Oliver Ot-to. 404 00:15:20,324 --> 00:15:23,659 Oliver Ot-to. 405 00:15:23,728 --> 00:15:24,960 Wait. 406 00:15:25,062 --> 00:15:27,396 What were we trying to remember? 407 00:15:30,134 --> 00:15:32,067 I really messed up. 408 00:15:32,169 --> 00:15:33,202 I can't pay for the frame, 409 00:15:33,304 --> 00:15:36,038 so Mom's not gonna have her birthday gift. 410 00:15:37,975 --> 00:15:40,442 I think we should just call Dad and tell him what happened. 411 00:15:40,544 --> 00:15:42,811 We can't. He's gonna be so mad. 412 00:15:42,913 --> 00:15:44,513 You know how he spits when he yells. 413 00:15:44,615 --> 00:15:46,215 He's gonna get nipple cream all over me. 414 00:15:47,251 --> 00:15:49,151 Ugh. What are we gonna do? 415 00:16:00,297 --> 00:16:02,431 ♪ Here I am for the first time ♪ 416 00:16:02,533 --> 00:16:04,666 ♪ Look to my right, and I see the Hollywood sign ♪ 417 00:16:04,769 --> 00:16:06,668 ♪ This is all so crazy ♪ 418 00:16:06,771 --> 00:16:08,704 ♪ Everybody here's so famous ♪ 419 00:16:08,806 --> 00:16:11,473 ♪ So I put my hands up, playin' my song ♪ 420 00:16:11,575 --> 00:16:13,308 ♪ Butterflies fly away ♪ 421 00:16:13,411 --> 00:16:15,477 ♪ Noddin' my head like yeah ♪ 422 00:16:15,546 --> 00:16:17,179 ♪ Movin' my hips like yeah ♪ 423 00:16:17,281 --> 00:16:19,848 ♪ And I put my hands up, playin' my song ♪ 424 00:16:19,950 --> 00:16:21,784 ♪ Know I'm gonna be okay ♪ 425 00:16:21,852 --> 00:16:25,854 ♪ Yea-a-a-a-a-ah, it's a party in the USA ♪ 426 00:16:35,099 --> 00:16:37,433 Dude, I'm sorry, but I just don't get how... 427 00:16:37,535 --> 00:16:40,069 Okay, so where are you guys? 428 00:16:40,171 --> 00:16:41,270 Fine. We'll be right there. 429 00:16:42,606 --> 00:16:44,106 We have to go pick up my parents. 430 00:16:44,208 --> 00:16:45,441 Apparently, they lost all their stuff 431 00:16:45,509 --> 00:16:47,543 and are stranded somewhere completely random. 432 00:16:47,645 --> 00:16:49,211 I'll text my driver to come pick us up. 433 00:16:50,414 --> 00:16:51,880 They never leave me alone. 434 00:16:51,982 --> 00:16:54,416 I can't even get one day away from them, you know? 435 00:16:54,518 --> 00:16:56,218 Actually, I don't. 436 00:16:56,320 --> 00:16:58,353 I'm not even sure if my parents know I'm in L.A. 437 00:16:58,456 --> 00:16:59,488 Aw, sorry, dude. 438 00:16:59,590 --> 00:17:02,024 I forgot they're AWOL all the time. 439 00:17:02,126 --> 00:17:04,026 Huh. 440 00:17:04,128 --> 00:17:06,862 I think I get what you were trying to tell me. 441 00:17:06,964 --> 00:17:08,363 It feels bad when your best friend 442 00:17:08,466 --> 00:17:11,800 has something you want but can't have. 443 00:17:11,869 --> 00:17:13,135 How about this... 444 00:17:13,237 --> 00:17:15,571 from now on, I'll be sensitive to what you don't have, 445 00:17:15,673 --> 00:17:17,673 and you'll be sensitive to what I don't have. 446 00:17:17,741 --> 00:17:20,142 Cool! And if you want, I'll keep sharing my money. 447 00:17:20,244 --> 00:17:21,410 And I'll keep sharing my parents. 448 00:17:21,512 --> 00:17:22,544 Sweet. 449 00:17:22,646 --> 00:17:24,146 Can I get a little more Katie than Greg? 450 00:17:24,248 --> 00:17:25,681 I mean, your dad's chill, 451 00:17:25,749 --> 00:17:27,816 but your mom's just on another level. 452 00:17:27,918 --> 00:17:29,251 I love that chica. 453 00:17:31,122 --> 00:17:34,256 Oh, my God! Anna-Kat, you made over $100! 454 00:17:34,358 --> 00:17:36,625 Not including the fake money with pictures of Elvis on it. 455 00:17:37,828 --> 00:17:39,361 Please don't tell me how he died. 456 00:17:39,463 --> 00:17:40,496 Fine. 457 00:17:41,599 --> 00:17:42,931 Heart attack on the toilet. 458 00:17:44,401 --> 00:17:46,268 I want to apologize. 459 00:17:46,370 --> 00:17:48,237 I've been complaining about having to look after you, 460 00:17:48,339 --> 00:17:50,506 but you ended up being the one looking after me. 461 00:17:52,042 --> 00:17:53,408 We'll look after each other. 462 00:17:53,511 --> 00:17:56,145 Let's go pick up Mom's present. 463 00:17:56,247 --> 00:17:58,380 Hey! Let's double our money! 464 00:18:00,417 --> 00:18:01,850 - Me next! - Taylor. 465 00:18:01,952 --> 00:18:04,319 Maybe it'll just be me looking after you. 466 00:18:07,057 --> 00:18:08,790 Thank God Taylor knew how to get ahold of our Uber 467 00:18:08,893 --> 00:18:10,692 so we could get our stuff back. 468 00:18:10,794 --> 00:18:13,095 I was wrong to try and push our kids away. 469 00:18:13,197 --> 00:18:15,864 I was in such a rush for them to take care of themselves, 470 00:18:15,966 --> 00:18:18,767 when it turns out we can't even take care of ourselves. 471 00:18:18,869 --> 00:18:20,602 Yeah, if you think we can't take care of ourselves now, 472 00:18:20,704 --> 00:18:22,319 - wait until we get older. - I know! 473 00:18:22,397 --> 00:18:24,206 When we're 80, who's going to take us to the doctor? 474 00:18:24,308 --> 00:18:26,175 Or put us in a nursing home against our will? 475 00:18:26,277 --> 00:18:28,278 - Oliver. - Yeah. 476 00:18:28,340 --> 00:18:29,583 That's what I was gonna say. 477 00:18:32,950 --> 00:18:34,416 I don't see Lisa Vanderpump. 478 00:18:34,518 --> 00:18:37,786 Maybe she's at SUR shooting "Vanderpump Rules." 479 00:18:37,888 --> 00:18:39,688 Mm, she has been having trouble with Jax. 480 00:18:41,025 --> 00:18:42,791 This right here 481 00:18:42,893 --> 00:18:45,172 is the best birthday present I could've gotten. 482 00:18:46,363 --> 00:18:48,931 Well, here's one more. 483 00:18:49,033 --> 00:18:50,866 I know you didn't want to make a big deal about your birthday, 484 00:18:50,968 --> 00:18:52,401 but here's a little something from all of us. 485 00:18:52,503 --> 00:18:54,770 Happy birthday, Mom. 486 00:18:57,708 --> 00:18:59,875 Oh, my God! 487 00:18:59,977 --> 00:19:02,010 My favorite photo! 488 00:19:02,112 --> 00:19:03,912 - It's hilarious. - Aww. 489 00:19:04,014 --> 00:19:05,347 I love it. 490 00:19:05,449 --> 00:19:08,784 Happy birthday, Katie Otto! 491 00:19:08,886 --> 00:19:11,286 Lisa Vanderpump! 492 00:19:11,388 --> 00:19:13,455 How did you know that it was my birthday? 493 00:19:13,557 --> 00:19:16,570 Well, my godson called and told me. 494 00:19:16,603 --> 00:19:17,702 Hello, Cooper, darling. 495 00:19:17,728 --> 00:19:19,194 Mwah! 496 00:19:19,226 --> 00:19:21,059 My family, your money... it works. 497 00:19:21,130 --> 00:19:22,295 Perfectly. 498 00:19:22,398 --> 00:19:24,566 It's a real pleasure to meet you. We're such big fans. 499 00:19:24,668 --> 00:19:27,502 Wait, aren't you Professor Badonkadonk? 500 00:19:27,605 --> 00:19:28,704 As a matter of fact, I am. 501 00:19:28,806 --> 00:19:30,005 Ohh. 502 00:19:30,107 --> 00:19:33,261 Ken, Puffy, and I love your videos. 503 00:19:33,714 --> 00:19:35,566 Well, anyway, blow out the candles. 504 00:19:37,314 --> 00:19:38,880 Happy birthday, darling. 505 00:19:38,983 --> 00:19:40,349 - Mwah! - Thank you. 506 00:19:43,821 --> 00:19:45,552 This is amazing. 507 00:19:45,622 --> 00:19:47,329 I could be friends with her. 508 00:19:47,424 --> 00:19:48,724 We hooked her with Badonkadonk. 509 00:19:48,826 --> 00:19:50,726 Now you got to marry her godson to reel her in. 510 00:19:50,828 --> 00:19:53,695 - Mom, we're not gay. - But it's my birthday! 511 00:19:55,270 --> 00:19:57,208 This is super boring. 512 00:19:57,341 --> 00:20:00,655 No fighting, no backstabbing, this is terrible reality TV. 513 00:20:00,709 --> 00:20:02,764 At least we have that funny part when Ablin went to the bathroom 514 00:20:02,830 --> 00:20:04,063 and Luthor ate his sandwich. 515 00:20:05,859 --> 00:20:07,216 Did he drop something? 516 00:20:07,294 --> 00:20:09,151 No. He's proposing! 517 00:20:10,778 --> 00:20:12,269 Oh, my gosh! 518 00:20:12,349 --> 00:20:14,036 She said yes! 519 00:20:14,115 --> 00:20:15,630 Aww! 520 00:20:17,971 --> 00:20:20,358 Uh, Katie, why don't you open Doris and Angela's present? 521 00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:21,627 It's by the TV in the other room. 522 00:20:21,690 --> 00:20:23,287 - Oh. - Yeah. 523 00:20:32,453 --> 00:20:33,724 Happy birthday! 524 00:20:35,322 --> 00:20:38,724 You crazy bitches flew out here! 525 00:20:38,826 --> 00:20:39,896 Ooh! Big FIJIs! 526 00:20:45,602 --> 00:20:50,602 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com