1 00:00:06,049 --> 00:00:08,968 ‎NETFLIX 原创剧集 2 00:00:22,065 --> 00:00:23,858 ‎我是肮脏松鼠 3 00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:27,820 ‎听听那烦人的声音 4 00:00:27,904 --> 00:00:29,739 ‎真是我梦寐以求的松鼠 5 00:00:30,239 --> 00:00:32,158 ‎我还以为自己挺了解你了呢 6 00:00:33,201 --> 00:00:34,869 ‎动画片的乐趣 7 00:00:34,952 --> 00:00:37,580 ‎但这也太蠢了 骷髅才不会跳舞 8 00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:38,539 ‎除非… 9 00:00:38,623 --> 00:00:40,041 ‎我喜欢动画片 10 00:00:40,124 --> 00:00:42,418 ‎感觉就像真实的生活 ‎只不过是傻瓜的生活 11 00:00:42,502 --> 00:00:43,544 ‎安静 好好看剧 12 00:00:44,128 --> 00:00:45,630 ‎小碧 出来吧 13 00:00:45,713 --> 00:00:49,300 ‎让我猜猜 你是不是叫穆斯? ‎要喝啤酒吗? 14 00:00:49,383 --> 00:00:50,468 ‎-要 ‎-不要 15 00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:51,761 ‎-要 ‎-晚点再说吧 16 00:00:51,844 --> 00:00:53,012 ‎-要 ‎-好吧 要 17 00:00:53,096 --> 00:00:55,431 ‎但你得先告诉我 为什么地狱的电梯 18 00:00:55,515 --> 00:00:57,225 ‎会直接通往你的办公室 19 00:00:57,308 --> 00:00:59,852 ‎你跟地狱有什么关系? ‎还有 说好的啤酒呢? 20 00:00:59,936 --> 00:01:01,229 ‎我骗你的 没有啤酒 21 00:01:01,771 --> 00:01:03,439 ‎(呼叫:机器仆人) 22 00:01:03,523 --> 00:01:04,815 ‎我又骗了你 23 00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:07,735 ‎这里当然有啤酒 但没你们的份儿 24 00:01:07,819 --> 00:01:08,945 ‎杰瑞 锤子 25 00:01:12,490 --> 00:01:14,867 ‎那些灯泡很贵的 而且不能批发 26 00:01:14,951 --> 00:01:16,244 ‎老实交代 艾尔瓦 27 00:01:16,327 --> 00:01:19,372 ‎你在跟谁勾结?我要知道名字和日期 ‎还要三瓶啤酒和一碗坚果 28 00:01:20,039 --> 00:01:23,251 ‎(食人魔城 欢迎观赏 ‎我们漂亮的头骨堆 曾经的头骨塔) 29 00:01:32,802 --> 00:01:33,886 ‎你撞到我的关节了 30 00:01:54,574 --> 00:01:55,992 ‎我们为什么偷偷摸摸的? 31 00:01:56,075 --> 00:01:58,703 ‎王后想独享这个小混蛋 32 00:01:58,786 --> 00:01:59,996 ‎也许她饿了 33 00:02:00,079 --> 00:02:01,330 ‎她不能吃我 34 00:02:01,414 --> 00:02:04,375 ‎我是一个怀揣着希望和梦想 ‎有激情、有思想的生灵 35 00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:06,836 ‎我还没写完我的史诗级小说呢 36 00:02:06,919 --> 00:02:08,337 ‎男主名叫艾弗斯 37 00:02:08,420 --> 00:02:10,463 ‎闭嘴 自己往身上抹油吧 38 00:02:10,965 --> 00:02:13,467 ‎这跟第32章里的情节一模一样 39 00:02:13,968 --> 00:02:16,929 ‎不好意思 我对苹果过敏 40 00:02:44,916 --> 00:02:45,917 ‎放这里 41 00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:50,004 ‎我吃完了会打嗝通知你们 42 00:02:54,675 --> 00:02:55,635 ‎你在这里呀 43 00:02:55,718 --> 00:02:57,553 ‎该死的尖角精灵鞋 每次都害我暴露 44 00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:06,771 ‎我插!我插插插! 45 00:03:07,813 --> 00:03:09,649 ‎求求你 放了我 46 00:03:12,276 --> 00:03:13,861 ‎你到底有什么毛病? 47 00:03:13,945 --> 00:03:17,156 ‎告诉我你是谁 说吧 48 00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:18,741 ‎-什么? ‎-说呀 49 00:03:18,824 --> 00:03:19,992 ‎我不懂你的意思 50 00:03:20,076 --> 00:03:21,911 ‎你好 我是… 51 00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:28,167 ‎我…在试图理解这是什么情况 52 00:03:28,751 --> 00:03:32,922 ‎我知道你会说的 你话都到嘴边了 53 00:03:33,005 --> 00:03:36,300 ‎-你好 我是… ‎-艾弗? 54 00:03:36,384 --> 00:03:37,426 ‎你好 我是艾弗? 55 00:03:38,261 --> 00:03:40,763 ‎-我是你妈妈 ‎-什么? 56 00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:45,685 ‎你这么高大的姑娘?不可能 ‎那你为什么想吃我? 57 00:03:45,768 --> 00:03:48,729 ‎我没想吃你 我是想让你吃东西 58 00:03:49,355 --> 00:03:51,399 ‎瞧 我准备了你最喜欢的食物 59 00:03:51,482 --> 00:03:53,234 ‎芥末酱拌小银鱼 60 00:03:53,317 --> 00:03:54,485 ‎天啊 61 00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:58,781 ‎这事只有我的治疗师、披萨送货小哥 ‎还有我妈妈知道 62 00:03:59,282 --> 00:04:01,242 ‎你真的是我妈妈 63 00:04:01,325 --> 00:04:03,077 ‎我还以为你已经死了 64 00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:06,247 ‎我也以为你死了 ‎直到你女朋友提到了你的名字 65 00:04:06,330 --> 00:04:07,498 ‎你是说小碧吗? 66 00:04:08,082 --> 00:04:11,544 ‎我俩是开放式交往 ‎不限制对方跟其他种族的人约会 67 00:04:11,627 --> 00:04:13,838 ‎你现在是妈妈的小宝贝啦 68 00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:15,756 ‎但这事我们得保密 69 00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:19,468 ‎别担心 我不会再让任何人 ‎把你从我身边带走了 70 00:04:19,552 --> 00:04:23,139 ‎-把他给我 ‎-布洛克 他不是普通的精灵 71 00:04:23,222 --> 00:04:25,808 ‎你怎么总是对精灵有癖好 格劳达? 72 00:04:25,891 --> 00:04:29,729 ‎这个小矮子 ‎杀了我九个最英勇、最没用的守卫 73 00:04:29,812 --> 00:04:32,982 ‎你知道规矩的 ‎我们要在黎明时分处决他 74 00:04:35,484 --> 00:04:37,695 ‎什么?不! 75 00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:39,947 ‎不要啊! 76 00:04:40,448 --> 00:04:43,367 ‎第32章:好人、坏人、屁股人 77 00:05:09,685 --> 00:05:10,978 ‎小碧到此一游 78 00:05:11,479 --> 00:05:12,980 ‎字写得真难看 79 00:05:16,442 --> 00:05:19,403 ‎为了避免不必要的打骂 我想告诉你 80 00:05:19,487 --> 00:05:21,530 ‎我意识到了自己犯的错误 81 00:05:21,614 --> 00:05:24,241 ‎我真的很喜欢你 ‎但我不能逼着你爱我 82 00:05:24,325 --> 00:05:26,160 ‎很好 因为我甚至都不喜欢你 83 00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:27,078 ‎什么? 84 00:05:27,161 --> 00:05:28,496 ‎是哦 85 00:05:28,996 --> 00:05:29,872 ‎这笑话不错 小碧 86 00:05:30,915 --> 00:05:32,750 ‎椅子很酷 但你少跟我装纯情 87 00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:34,293 ‎这是我的最新发明 88 00:05:34,377 --> 00:05:36,504 ‎屁屁战车 你想试试吗? 89 00:05:36,587 --> 00:05:38,672 ‎别扯东扯西的了 ‎你到底对地狱了解多少? 90 00:05:39,423 --> 00:05:42,718 ‎那是我邻居 仅此而已 ‎跟谁做邻居又不是我能决定的 91 00:05:42,802 --> 00:05:44,303 ‎对 就是这样 92 00:05:44,387 --> 00:05:46,514 ‎另外 地狱为蒸汽国提供蒸汽 93 00:05:46,597 --> 00:05:48,766 ‎原理大家都知道 地热室什么的 94 00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:51,018 ‎你在游乐场乘坐小火车 ‎观看过讲解 记得吗? 95 00:05:51,102 --> 00:05:52,853 ‎讲解中没有提到地狱 96 00:05:52,937 --> 00:05:55,189 ‎蒸汽国和地狱之间有一场交易 97 00:05:55,272 --> 00:05:56,941 ‎我不相信你认识撒旦 98 00:05:57,024 --> 00:05:59,068 ‎魅力四射的帅哥 ‎出人意料地风度翩翩 99 00:05:59,151 --> 00:06:00,111 ‎他长什么样? 100 00:06:00,194 --> 00:06:03,823 ‎红色的面庞、头上两个角 ‎可爱的高颧骨、尖尖的山羊胡 101 00:06:03,906 --> 00:06:06,117 ‎你只是在照着辣酱瓶上图像描述 102 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,619 ‎-他眼睛是什么颜色? ‎-像旋转的沙滩球 103 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,079 ‎看来你真的认识他 104 00:06:10,162 --> 00:06:12,748 ‎但是等一下 ‎你不可能跟恶魔做了交易之后 105 00:06:12,832 --> 00:06:14,291 ‎还能一如既往地过日子 106 00:06:18,879 --> 00:06:20,047 ‎杰瑞! 107 00:06:20,131 --> 00:06:21,382 ‎我以为我们要唱歌呢 108 00:06:21,465 --> 00:06:24,051 ‎也许蒸汽国的好人们会想知道 109 00:06:24,135 --> 00:06:25,803 ‎你跟撒旦做的交易? 110 00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:30,724 ‎我会昭告天下 你的科儿学 ‎是靠地狱之火和诅咒支持的 111 00:06:30,808 --> 00:06:33,394 ‎我还会告诉撒旦你说他妈妈的坏话 112 00:06:33,477 --> 00:06:34,603 ‎可我什么也没说啊 113 00:06:34,687 --> 00:06:36,981 ‎其实是我说的 ‎但我要告诉他是你说的 114 00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:39,775 ‎小碧 我不太擅长察言观色 115 00:06:39,859 --> 00:06:41,986 ‎但你生气的样子好美啊 116 00:06:42,069 --> 00:06:43,112 ‎拉住我 杰瑞 117 00:06:43,195 --> 00:06:45,239 ‎-拉住我 杰瑞! ‎-我拉住你啦 118 00:06:45,322 --> 00:06:46,740 ‎别让我打他 我真的好想揍他 119 00:06:46,824 --> 00:06:48,576 ‎-她会打你的 ‎-小心! 120 00:06:48,659 --> 00:06:50,202 ‎别惹我们! 121 00:06:50,286 --> 00:06:53,706 ‎好啦 冷静 小碧 ‎我好像不该这么说 122 00:06:53,789 --> 00:06:56,459 ‎听着 我想赢回你的信任 ‎不想你打我 123 00:06:56,542 --> 00:06:58,210 ‎为了证明我的动机是单纯的… 124 00:06:58,294 --> 00:07:00,629 ‎-是哦 单纯的欲望 你个变态 ‎-欲望? 125 00:07:00,713 --> 00:07:01,881 ‎小碧 看看我 126 00:07:01,964 --> 00:07:04,467 ‎午夜时分 我一个人坐在这里 ‎边看动画片 127 00:07:04,550 --> 00:07:06,260 ‎边吃罐装豆泥 128 00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:07,511 ‎你可以相信我 129 00:07:07,595 --> 00:07:10,139 ‎我现在就证明给你看 我会带你回家 130 00:07:10,222 --> 00:07:11,223 ‎(飞船) 131 00:07:11,307 --> 00:07:14,018 ‎蒸汽国最大的飞船 132 00:07:14,101 --> 00:07:17,438 ‎某些神秘的原因驱使着我建造了它 133 00:07:17,521 --> 00:07:19,982 ‎我给它取名“巨鸟号” 134 00:07:25,029 --> 00:07:26,322 ‎出发 航向梦之国! 135 00:07:26,405 --> 00:07:28,282 ‎在这段旅途中 小碧 你会见证到 136 00:07:28,365 --> 00:07:30,576 ‎科学和魔法的结合 137 00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:33,078 ‎能带我们超越最狂野的梦想 138 00:07:33,871 --> 00:07:36,290 ‎-杰瑞! ‎-他话太多了 139 00:07:36,373 --> 00:07:37,291 ‎我们走吧 140 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:40,878 ‎艾尔瓦居然没发明防护栏 141 00:07:41,378 --> 00:07:43,380 ‎下面的人像虫子一样小耶 142 00:07:45,049 --> 00:07:48,177 ‎(我杀了九个食人魔 哈哈哈 ‎艾弗) 143 00:07:54,725 --> 00:07:56,435 ‎你搞什么啊? 144 00:07:56,519 --> 00:07:59,438 ‎我还想在他们 ‎明早处死我之前睡一觉呢 145 00:08:00,105 --> 00:08:01,524 ‎别对我指手画脚 146 00:08:02,107 --> 00:08:03,359 ‎安静 你这笨蛋! 147 00:08:03,442 --> 00:08:05,819 ‎老爹 你是来救我的吗? 148 00:08:08,697 --> 00:08:11,200 ‎现在不是了 你个没脑子的话痨 149 00:08:11,283 --> 00:08:12,326 ‎你怎么回事啊? 150 00:08:12,409 --> 00:08:15,329 ‎连什么时候该闭嘴 ‎什么时候该睡觉都不知道 151 00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:18,791 ‎老爹 你是怎么找到我的? ‎你来做什么?别打我 152 00:08:19,375 --> 00:08:20,960 ‎我要告诉你一个真实的故事 153 00:08:21,043 --> 00:08:23,671 ‎-所以 拿张凳子过来 ‎-监狱里没有凳子 154 00:08:23,754 --> 00:08:26,215 ‎要是我有凳子就好了 ‎我可以用它敲你的头 155 00:08:26,298 --> 00:08:29,051 ‎其实我才是你被抓到这里的 ‎真正原因 要知道… 156 00:08:29,134 --> 00:08:32,263 ‎不 我知道 而且我有好多问题要问 157 00:08:32,346 --> 00:08:34,139 ‎比如 你为什么像那样说话? 158 00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:35,140 ‎闭嘴! 159 00:08:35,224 --> 00:08:39,061 ‎那是很久以前的事了 ‎当时还没有你打断别人说话 160 00:08:39,144 --> 00:08:40,145 ‎也就是没发生过 161 00:08:40,729 --> 00:08:43,065 ‎你确定没有凳子吗? 162 00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:46,860 ‎我以前是精灵森林糖果公司的 ‎一名旅行商人 163 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:53,867 ‎(精灵森林糖果公司) 164 00:08:53,951 --> 00:08:56,579 ‎我跟我最好的朋友 ‎一条名叫“汪汪”的大狗 165 00:08:56,662 --> 00:08:58,914 ‎一起离开了精灵森林 166 00:09:08,757 --> 00:09:12,177 ‎我可以随时随地 ‎向任何人兜售任何商品 167 00:09:12,261 --> 00:09:14,680 ‎总之 我给很多人带去了欢乐 168 00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:16,181 ‎给更多的人带去了肥胖 169 00:09:16,265 --> 00:09:18,684 ‎在我年轻时 遇见了形形色色的人 170 00:09:19,602 --> 00:09:20,894 ‎哇! 171 00:09:25,774 --> 00:09:27,192 ‎你好呀 陌生人 172 00:09:27,276 --> 00:09:29,987 ‎-我是葛莱特 ‎-我是韩赛尔 怪胎 173 00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:33,240 ‎你们好呀 小胖孩 ‎你们的父母在家吗? 174 00:09:33,324 --> 00:09:35,159 ‎-不在 ‎-不在 175 00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:36,201 ‎我们把他们吃了 176 00:09:36,285 --> 00:09:40,331 ‎听起来两个小胖墩该吃甜点了 177 00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:46,629 ‎似乎世界上有一些孤独的女性 178 00:09:46,712 --> 00:09:49,340 ‎想要比糖果更实在的东西 179 00:09:49,423 --> 00:09:51,175 ‎我指的可不是肉肠哦 180 00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:53,677 ‎不过确实跟我的肉肠有关系 小子 181 00:09:53,761 --> 00:09:54,845 ‎是 我懂你的意思 182 00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:57,681 ‎我们能绕过这个少儿不宜的部分 183 00:09:57,765 --> 00:09:59,683 ‎把故事线带回我身上吗?拜托 老爹 184 00:10:00,893 --> 00:10:03,896 ‎好吧 我遇到了一位鹤立鸡群的姑娘 185 00:10:03,979 --> 00:10:07,107 ‎我说的不只是她吓人的身高 186 00:10:07,191 --> 00:10:10,944 ‎你有幻想过 ‎跟一棵巨大的红杉木做爱吗? 187 00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:13,864 ‎她是一位公主 188 00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:16,325 ‎咱俩都对大个子公主 ‎情有独钟啊 艾弗 189 00:10:17,534 --> 00:10:19,453 ‎是的 老爹 继续说吧 190 00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:20,829 ‎我说到哪了? 191 00:10:20,913 --> 00:10:21,789 ‎哦 对了! 192 00:10:22,915 --> 00:10:23,749 ‎老爹! 193 00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:27,252 ‎总之 我和她在食人魔城郊邂逅了 194 00:10:27,336 --> 00:10:29,254 ‎我驾着我的糖果马车 195 00:10:29,338 --> 00:10:31,507 ‎而她刚刚打猎归来 196 00:10:31,590 --> 00:10:33,676 ‎就这么一见钟情了… 197 00:10:35,219 --> 00:10:36,553 ‎我单方面的 198 00:10:40,933 --> 00:10:42,685 ‎但我们精灵从不轻言放弃 199 00:10:42,768 --> 00:10:45,396 ‎除了放弃仔 他就只会做这个! 200 00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:49,149 ‎但捅刀仔结果了他 干净利落 201 00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:50,734 ‎-老爹… ‎-但正如我先前所说… 202 00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:53,612 ‎我和汪汪每天 ‎都带着不同的糖果在原地等待 203 00:10:59,076 --> 00:11:00,494 ‎而她不为所动 204 00:11:03,789 --> 00:11:05,082 ‎然后我突然领悟到 205 00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:07,251 ‎问题不在我 而是在糖果 206 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,961 ‎食人魔不爱甜食 207 00:11:09,044 --> 00:11:12,423 ‎于是 我迅速为她 ‎炮制了一颗风味独特的糖果 208 00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:16,343 ‎它酸得恰到好处 ‎是刚好会让人撅嘴的程度 209 00:11:24,101 --> 00:11:25,769 ‎我们亲嘴了 210 00:11:27,938 --> 00:11:29,314 ‎噢 格劳达! 211 00:11:29,398 --> 00:11:31,316 ‎噢 年轻的老爹! 212 00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:33,986 ‎从那天起 我成了她的小甜心 213 00:11:34,069 --> 00:11:37,614 ‎我们一直低调地交往 ‎因为她父母绝对不会同意咱俩的事 214 00:11:37,698 --> 00:11:40,743 ‎结果看来 她的丑八怪男友也不同意 215 00:11:41,785 --> 00:11:44,496 ‎好了 先生 ‎你绝对猜不到接下来发了什么 216 00:11:45,831 --> 00:11:47,332 ‎好耶! 217 00:11:47,916 --> 00:11:49,376 ‎拜托 跳过那部分 218 00:11:49,460 --> 00:11:51,879 ‎怎么 你是老处女吗? ‎你不喜欢想象… 219 00:11:55,466 --> 00:11:56,550 ‎天啊 220 00:11:58,385 --> 00:11:59,470 ‎老爹 221 00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:02,431 ‎结果如何? 222 00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:05,100 ‎-一道蓝杠 ‎-我的老天爷! 223 00:12:05,184 --> 00:12:07,978 ‎那根糖果棒要是没坏的话 ‎那你就是怀孕了 224 00:12:08,479 --> 00:12:12,149 ‎我俩都知道 我们在食人魔城 ‎没有未来 只有死路一条 225 00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:13,942 ‎所以 我们等到夜幕降临 226 00:12:16,278 --> 00:12:18,363 ‎我给出了信号 227 00:12:37,174 --> 00:12:40,093 ‎(蒸汽国 丹克麦尔 新克里默拉 ‎达斯维尔 裸露城 星光镇) 228 00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:41,345 ‎(奥斯纳德 梦之国) 229 00:12:43,055 --> 00:12:44,181 ‎瞧它要掉地上了 230 00:12:46,475 --> 00:12:47,726 ‎还好那不是我 231 00:12:54,149 --> 00:12:55,943 ‎我不能带格劳达回精灵森林 232 00:12:56,026 --> 00:12:58,320 ‎当然也不能回食人魔城 233 00:12:58,403 --> 00:13:00,739 ‎所以 我们自己打造了一个温馨的家 234 00:13:00,823 --> 00:13:03,826 ‎与丛林里的苍蝇、蚊子和蝎子为伴 235 00:13:08,914 --> 00:13:12,417 ‎我们在树上躲避那一带最凶残的生物 236 00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:15,128 ‎地精! 237 00:13:18,549 --> 00:13:20,634 ‎她是我的一生挚爱 238 00:13:20,717 --> 00:13:21,802 ‎让我幸福到云端 239 00:13:23,679 --> 00:13:26,640 ‎不久之后 你出生了 240 00:13:30,227 --> 00:13:31,478 ‎瞧瞧他 老爹 241 00:13:31,562 --> 00:13:33,522 ‎是啊 无论如何 我还是会爱他的 242 00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:35,148 ‎(小心幼儿) 243 00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:37,568 ‎你真是个捣蛋鬼 244 00:13:37,651 --> 00:13:40,779 ‎整天瞎胡闹 像你老爸一样 245 00:13:40,863 --> 00:13:42,614 ‎快看我 爸爸艾弗 246 00:13:43,532 --> 00:13:45,701 ‎挺好的 小子 但我的名字是老爹 247 00:13:45,784 --> 00:13:48,912 ‎再叫我爸爸艾弗 我就打你屁屁 248 00:13:48,996 --> 00:13:51,790 ‎每次我一那么说 你就乖乖闭嘴了 249 00:13:51,874 --> 00:13:52,708 ‎(老爹 艾弗 妈妈) 250 00:13:52,791 --> 00:13:57,087 ‎我原本想给你起名叫捣蛋仔 ‎暴躁仔、打屁屁仔或者小臭仔 251 00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:58,463 ‎但你妈妈不同意 252 00:13:58,547 --> 00:14:01,550 ‎她希望你能为自己的精灵血统骄傲 253 00:14:07,848 --> 00:14:09,892 ‎来吧 告诉我你是谁 254 00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:12,561 ‎你好 我是艾弗 255 00:14:14,563 --> 00:14:15,689 ‎你好 艾弗 256 00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:17,691 ‎再说一遍 257 00:14:18,275 --> 00:14:20,736 ‎-你好 我是艾弗 ‎-再说一遍 258 00:14:21,612 --> 00:14:26,658 ‎住手 259 00:14:26,742 --> 00:14:27,951 ‎住手! 260 00:14:28,035 --> 00:14:31,705 ‎我的艾弗小宝贝 在家甜甜入梦乡 261 00:14:31,788 --> 00:14:35,083 ‎梦见伟大战役 还有嗜杀地精 262 00:14:35,167 --> 00:14:39,046 ‎生活也许可怕 生活并不公平 263 00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:44,593 ‎当你感到孤单 妈妈陪伴左右 264 00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:57,439 ‎哇 难怪我会是这个样子 ‎我开始明白了 265 00:14:57,522 --> 00:14:58,774 ‎我还是不明白 266 00:14:58,857 --> 00:15:02,027 ‎你总是沉浸在自己的世界里 ‎愿神保佑你 267 00:15:02,110 --> 00:15:04,446 ‎哪怕在那改变命运的一天也是如此 268 00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:18,961 ‎嘿!那是我的尿布 你这小偷! 269 00:15:24,549 --> 00:15:27,094 ‎看起来毫无希望的追逐 ‎但你从不放弃 270 00:15:55,956 --> 00:15:59,501 ‎你带着艾弗躲起来 ‎我回头去树屋找你们 271 00:16:11,555 --> 00:16:12,597 ‎天啊 272 00:16:12,681 --> 00:16:16,393 ‎我接下来要告诉你的 ‎是我这辈子最难以启齿的一句话 273 00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:17,978 ‎-我爱你? ‎-当然不是! 274 00:16:18,061 --> 00:16:20,147 ‎我总得留点什么在临死前对你说吧 275 00:16:20,230 --> 00:16:21,982 ‎是关于你妈妈的 276 00:16:22,065 --> 00:16:23,066 ‎妈妈怎么了? 277 00:16:23,150 --> 00:16:25,652 ‎你妈妈是一名强大的战士 278 00:16:25,736 --> 00:16:29,072 ‎不幸的是 ‎她同时也是一个显眼的目标 279 00:16:29,156 --> 00:16:31,158 ‎-不! ‎-安静 280 00:16:31,241 --> 00:16:33,326 ‎别逼我打你屁屁 281 00:16:39,291 --> 00:16:40,125 ‎妈妈! 282 00:16:45,589 --> 00:16:48,175 ‎-地精发现我们了 ‎-是因为我 283 00:16:48,258 --> 00:16:49,551 ‎当然是因为你! 284 00:16:49,634 --> 00:16:51,720 ‎真不知道你这话多的毛病 ‎是从哪学来的 285 00:16:52,220 --> 00:16:53,555 ‎我之前说到… 286 00:17:01,104 --> 00:17:03,273 ‎那是我的裤子 你们这帮混蛋 287 00:17:04,232 --> 00:17:05,525 ‎混蛋! 288 00:17:16,828 --> 00:17:18,914 ‎爸爸艾弗! 289 00:17:18,997 --> 00:17:20,957 ‎那些着火的猴子还好吗? 290 00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:34,763 ‎我们的家毁了 291 00:17:34,846 --> 00:17:38,266 ‎所以我把你带回了精灵森林 ‎只有那里才是安全的 292 00:17:38,350 --> 00:17:42,104 ‎愿她安息 ‎从那之后 我再也没见过你妈妈 293 00:17:42,187 --> 00:17:43,480 ‎直到现在 294 00:17:45,315 --> 00:17:47,275 ‎-格劳达? ‎-噢 老爹 295 00:17:47,359 --> 00:17:49,069 ‎我从来没想到会有这一天 296 00:17:49,152 --> 00:17:51,530 ‎我以为你死了 被地精杀死了 297 00:17:51,613 --> 00:17:54,699 ‎我看见了…那些血 ‎燃烧的火箭正中你的心脏 298 00:17:54,783 --> 00:17:59,579 ‎-老爹 是你救了我 ‎-我? 299 00:17:59,663 --> 00:18:03,291 ‎当时我正处于上风 ‎甚至还玩得挺开心的 300 00:18:15,095 --> 00:18:16,930 ‎那支箭并没有射中我的心脏 301 00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:18,932 ‎而是射在了糖果盒子上 302 00:18:19,015 --> 00:18:20,392 ‎那些也不是血 303 00:18:20,475 --> 00:18:22,853 ‎是酸樱桃糖浆 304 00:18:24,062 --> 00:18:25,772 ‎我用最快的速度赶回树屋 305 00:18:29,734 --> 00:18:33,280 ‎老爹?小艾弗?汪汪? 306 00:18:37,576 --> 00:18:38,660 ‎不可能! 307 00:18:40,370 --> 00:18:43,707 ‎艾弗!老爹! 308 00:18:43,790 --> 00:18:45,083 ‎是那两只猴子 309 00:18:45,167 --> 00:18:48,879 ‎我拍掉身上的尘土 ‎回到食人魔城 回归原来的生活 310 00:18:48,962 --> 00:18:50,172 ‎嫁给了布洛克 311 00:18:50,255 --> 00:18:53,925 ‎但我无时无刻不在思念 ‎我的丛林小子们 312 00:18:58,013 --> 00:19:00,223 ‎我一直梦想着这一刻 313 00:19:00,307 --> 00:19:02,392 ‎既然你们俩都在这里了 妈妈爸爸… 314 00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:03,476 ‎哇 315 00:19:03,977 --> 00:19:06,104 ‎这么说感觉好奇怪 316 00:19:06,188 --> 00:19:08,523 ‎妈妈 爸爸 317 00:19:08,607 --> 00:19:10,567 ‎妈妈… 318 00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:11,943 ‎爸爸… 319 00:19:13,028 --> 00:19:15,697 ‎妈妈… 320 00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:17,282 ‎爸爸… 321 00:19:24,206 --> 00:19:27,375 ‎这将是一个很美好的星期一 322 00:19:33,465 --> 00:19:35,175 ‎你的死期到了 323 00:19:35,258 --> 00:19:36,885 ‎-抓住这只精灵! ‎-住手 布洛克 324 00:19:36,968 --> 00:19:38,511 ‎他不是普通的精灵 325 00:19:38,595 --> 00:19:41,640 ‎他是我儿子 是皇室血脉 326 00:19:41,723 --> 00:19:43,725 ‎你不能杀死王位继承人 327 00:19:43,808 --> 00:19:45,852 ‎那我算什么 妈妈? 328 00:19:45,936 --> 00:19:49,189 ‎我才是你儿子 我是第一王位继承人 329 00:19:49,272 --> 00:19:51,983 ‎天啊 小子! 330 00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:53,985 ‎你是我弟弟! 331 00:19:54,069 --> 00:19:56,780 ‎我认识这精灵 我要挑战你 332 00:19:56,863 --> 00:19:58,615 ‎我们一决生死 333 00:19:58,698 --> 00:19:59,574 ‎不行 小子 宝贝 334 00:19:59,658 --> 00:20:02,577 ‎虽然你是王后 但挑战书已下 335 00:20:02,661 --> 00:20:04,496 ‎你想要我们兄弟相残? 336 00:20:04,579 --> 00:20:05,413 ‎-对! ‎-对! 337 00:20:05,497 --> 00:20:06,498 ‎小菜一碟 338 00:20:06,998 --> 00:20:08,750 ‎我的断头饭就要这个 339 00:20:13,797 --> 00:20:15,715 ‎身为恶魔 约会真的好难 340 00:20:15,799 --> 00:20:17,968 ‎好男人不是被附身了就是活死人 341 00:20:18,051 --> 00:20:19,719 ‎要不就是我一开口他就跑了 342 00:20:19,803 --> 00:20:21,596 ‎但我遇到过一个潜在的交往对象 343 00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:23,723 ‎他叫波吉 长得超帅 344 00:20:23,807 --> 00:20:26,685 ‎但他从来不会表达自己的感受 ‎或者说 他从来不说话 345 00:20:27,602 --> 00:20:29,145 ‎嘿 路西? 346 00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:31,273 ‎是我 斯黛西安勒布拉特 347 00:20:31,356 --> 00:20:33,942 ‎我们在那个全是鸟粪的洞穴里 ‎约过会 记得吗? 348 00:20:34,609 --> 00:20:36,152 ‎你好像变得不太一样了 349 00:20:36,236 --> 00:20:38,530 ‎我知道了 你现在有翅膀了! 350 00:20:38,613 --> 00:20:40,615 ‎你还会发出那迷人的噪音吗? 351 00:20:42,409 --> 00:20:43,660 ‎就是这个声音 352 00:20:44,369 --> 00:20:46,746 ‎看这群鸟 好壮观啊 353 00:20:46,830 --> 00:20:48,540 ‎大自然真美 是吧? 354 00:20:49,582 --> 00:20:50,750 ‎搞什么? 355 00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:54,713 ‎慢着 别刮了!那是我的身体! 356 00:21:01,136 --> 00:21:02,137 ‎抓住你喽! 357 00:21:03,263 --> 00:21:04,848 ‎这家伙活蹦乱跳的 358 00:21:04,931 --> 00:21:06,641 ‎好了 我来注入灵魂 你把头安上去 359 00:21:06,725 --> 00:21:08,601 ‎一、二、三 360 00:21:12,814 --> 00:21:14,232 ‎哇 我屁股真的很性感 361 00:21:15,025 --> 00:21:16,026 ‎还不赖 362 00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:19,946 ‎欢迎回来 朋友 363 00:21:20,447 --> 00:21:21,740 ‎抱歉 我会修好的 364 00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:25,201 ‎不 杰瑞 放下锤子 365 00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:26,703 ‎我很好 真的 366 00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:28,580 ‎往左拧松 往右拧紧 367 00:21:34,377 --> 00:21:37,213 ‎(今日举行生死对决 一如往日) 368 00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:39,341 ‎妈妈 你得帮帮我 369 00:21:39,424 --> 00:21:42,177 ‎很抱歉 艾弗 我只能帮你到这里了 370 00:21:42,260 --> 00:21:43,762 ‎这是你在丛林里使用过的武器 371 00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:46,473 ‎我的玩具匕首 372 00:21:47,474 --> 00:21:49,434 ‎我是三岁小孩吗?天啊 373 00:21:49,517 --> 00:21:51,770 ‎什么?不 我很喜欢 ‎它们很好 谢谢你 374 00:21:51,853 --> 00:21:56,149 ‎非常感谢 谢谢 对 我会把它们 ‎放到书架上 跟那些我不需要 375 00:21:56,232 --> 00:21:58,109 ‎也从来不会看一眼的东西放在一起 376 00:21:58,193 --> 00:22:00,570 ‎嘿 儿子 如果这样 ‎能让你安心一点的话 377 00:22:00,653 --> 00:22:02,197 ‎我搞到了超赞的座位! 378 00:22:09,454 --> 00:22:10,663 ‎亚米 敲锣吧 379 00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:30,141 ‎像样点 小子 ‎你出击的架势活像只地精 380 00:22:46,574 --> 00:22:47,992 ‎我们不该打架 381 00:22:48,993 --> 00:22:51,329 ‎-我们是兄弟 ‎-兄弟总爱打架 382 00:22:51,913 --> 00:22:53,164 ‎这是历史悠久的传统 383 00:22:53,665 --> 00:22:54,833 ‎但不会下死手啊 384 00:22:55,625 --> 00:22:58,128 ‎你用刀戳瞎我的眼睛 385 00:22:58,211 --> 00:22:59,754 ‎毁了我的艺术生涯 386 00:22:59,838 --> 00:23:01,673 ‎你的作品毫无新意 小子 387 00:23:01,756 --> 00:23:02,590 ‎现在 杀了他! 388 00:23:04,467 --> 00:23:05,802 ‎我正在努力 爸爸! 389 00:23:06,511 --> 00:23:07,762 ‎别再吼我了! 390 00:23:09,305 --> 00:23:11,266 ‎来吧 小子 用行动博得我的爱 391 00:23:40,378 --> 00:23:41,337 ‎什么? 392 00:23:44,716 --> 00:23:45,550 ‎好孩子 393 00:23:45,633 --> 00:23:48,303 ‎我一直以为你做不到 ‎但你让我开了眼 394 00:23:48,386 --> 00:23:51,014 ‎对决结束了 不需要有人死 395 00:23:51,097 --> 00:23:53,558 ‎需要 规矩就是规矩 396 00:23:53,641 --> 00:23:54,851 ‎但他是你儿子啊 397 00:23:54,934 --> 00:23:57,937 ‎不再是了 他就是个令人失望的废物 398 00:23:58,021 --> 00:23:59,022 ‎快杀了他吧 399 00:24:02,901 --> 00:24:04,986 ‎求你别戳我的脸 400 00:24:15,038 --> 00:24:16,998 ‎我不想伤害你 小子 401 00:24:17,081 --> 00:24:19,125 ‎我想帮你 我们是家人 402 00:24:19,209 --> 00:24:20,543 ‎那是我的小废物 403 00:24:22,212 --> 00:24:24,005 ‎把它插回去 快! 404 00:24:25,089 --> 00:24:27,884 ‎哥哥会保护自己的弟弟 405 00:24:27,967 --> 00:24:29,719 ‎哪怕弟弟比哥哥高大很多 406 00:24:29,802 --> 00:24:32,305 ‎快 小子 利用他的同情心 407 00:24:32,388 --> 00:24:33,932 ‎杀了那个精灵! 408 00:24:34,015 --> 00:24:35,934 ‎不 艾弗说得对 409 00:24:36,017 --> 00:24:37,769 ‎我谁也不杀 410 00:24:37,852 --> 00:24:39,437 ‎我要放下屠刀 411 00:24:46,653 --> 00:24:48,279 ‎怎么了?我砸死了谁? 412 00:24:48,363 --> 00:24:50,448 ‎别担心 就是个混蛋 413 00:24:50,532 --> 00:24:51,866 ‎是我爸 对吗? 414 00:24:52,367 --> 00:24:53,576 ‎我现在很开心 415 00:24:54,994 --> 00:24:57,830 ‎追哥哥比杀哥哥好玩 416 00:24:59,332 --> 00:25:00,833 ‎我给你降低一点难度 417 00:25:00,917 --> 00:25:02,043 ‎我刚才放屁了 418 00:25:06,756 --> 00:25:09,759 ‎看起来小伙子们玩得很开心啊 419 00:25:09,842 --> 00:25:11,636 ‎咱俩也玩点开心的吧 420 00:25:20,770 --> 00:25:22,564 ‎这画面可不是天天都能看到 421 00:25:22,647 --> 00:25:24,983 ‎一只满脸皱纹的老精灵 ‎在跟一头食人魔做爱 422 00:25:25,066 --> 00:25:26,317 ‎精灵?哪里? 423 00:25:27,360 --> 00:25:29,404 ‎艾弗 我们来救你! 424 00:25:34,117 --> 00:25:35,285 ‎艾弗! 425 00:25:35,368 --> 00:25:38,037 ‎我就一动不动站在这呢 小笨蛋 426 00:25:39,497 --> 00:25:41,082 ‎艾弗! 427 00:25:42,208 --> 00:25:43,710 ‎儿子 你要去哪? 428 00:25:46,462 --> 00:25:49,048 ‎老爹 我们会再掉头回来救你的 429 00:25:49,132 --> 00:25:51,050 ‎不用了 小姑娘 430 00:25:51,134 --> 00:25:52,051 ‎我喜欢这里 431 00:25:52,135 --> 00:25:53,303 ‎怎么了? 432 00:25:53,386 --> 00:25:56,014 ‎是艾弗的朋友 他不会有事的 433 00:26:00,018 --> 00:26:02,687 ‎是酸糖果哦 你喜欢的口味 434 00:26:02,770 --> 00:26:03,980 ‎存放了二十年 435 00:26:04,814 --> 00:26:08,693 ‎它们粘在一块儿了 ‎就像你和我 如胶似漆 436 00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:17,744 ‎艾弗! 437 00:27:16,094 --> 00:27:21,099 ‎字幕翻译: 覃璇