1 00:00:01,766 --> 00:00:03,483 TRAY: Every night, I have the same dream. 2 00:00:04,035 --> 00:00:05,868 [SIREN WAILS] 3 00:00:05,903 --> 00:00:07,369 [GUNSHOTS] 4 00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:09,983 It's the night I got arrested. 5 00:00:11,266 --> 00:00:12,765 The night of the final episode 6 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:15,434 of "American Idol," season one. 7 00:00:15,469 --> 00:00:18,303 ♪ Whoa, whoa ♪ 8 00:00:18,339 --> 00:00:21,892 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 9 00:00:22,643 --> 00:00:26,278 [SINGING INDISTINCTLY] 10 00:00:27,681 --> 00:00:29,681 ♪ Go Justin, go Justin ♪ 11 00:00:29,717 --> 00:00:31,783 ♪ My main man, my main man ♪ 12 00:00:31,819 --> 00:00:34,386 [SINGING INDISTINCTLY] 13 00:00:34,421 --> 00:00:35,962 Oh, yeah 14 00:00:35,963 --> 00:00:38,388 [SINGING INDISTINCTLY] 15 00:00:38,389 --> 00:00:40,223 SHAY: Oh! 16 00:00:40,258 --> 00:00:42,625 Look at my man, cooking food. 17 00:00:42,650 --> 00:00:44,116 - Get it, boy. - You know that. 18 00:00:44,151 --> 00:00:45,184 Yes! 19 00:00:45,219 --> 00:00:46,652 I love cooking for my boo. 20 00:00:46,687 --> 00:00:48,177 And I love you for that shit. 21 00:00:48,178 --> 00:00:49,535 Thank you, baby. 22 00:00:49,536 --> 00:00:52,177 I just want your booty to get as big as humanly possible. 23 00:00:52,312 --> 00:00:54,312 Boy, you crazy. You dumb as hell. 24 00:00:54,348 --> 00:00:55,847 No, I'm serious. 25 00:00:55,882 --> 00:00:58,283 I want it to look like one of them cartoon centaurs. 26 00:00:58,318 --> 00:00:59,651 You know, half man, half horse. 27 00:00:59,883 --> 00:01:01,950 So you want some of that magical booty. 28 00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:04,144 Some of that mythological ass. 29 00:01:04,145 --> 00:01:05,210 [LAUGHS] 30 00:01:05,245 --> 00:01:06,644 You been reading Greek mythology, boy? 31 00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:09,380 Yes, yes, yes. You got me. 32 00:01:09,416 --> 00:01:12,041 Ooh, the show about to start. Shut up, shut up. 33 00:01:12,419 --> 00:01:15,445 I'm calling it right now, Justin gonna win. 34 00:01:15,482 --> 00:01:18,289 Boy, please. Kelly is way more talented. 35 00:01:18,325 --> 00:01:20,024 Unh-unh, that boy got pure talent. 36 00:01:20,060 --> 00:01:21,792 Look at him. Look at him. 37 00:01:22,087 --> 00:01:23,553 His voice is butter. 38 00:01:23,763 --> 00:01:26,331 [VOCALIZING] 39 00:01:26,366 --> 00:01:27,706 [LAUGHS] 40 00:01:27,707 --> 00:01:29,060 You're so silly. 41 00:01:29,834 --> 00:01:31,300 I love you, Shay. 42 00:01:31,336 --> 00:01:32,899 Mm. I love you, too. 43 00:01:33,137 --> 00:01:34,470 [CHEERING] 44 00:01:34,506 --> 00:01:35,905 [SIGHS] 45 00:01:37,308 --> 00:01:38,761 Tray. Hmm? 46 00:01:39,043 --> 00:01:40,775 - We need to talk. - About what? 47 00:01:41,079 --> 00:01:42,605 - [SHARP WHISTLE] - I got... 48 00:01:42,847 --> 00:01:44,701 - [WHISTLING] - Let me get up. 49 00:01:44,964 --> 00:01:45,964 What? 50 00:01:46,618 --> 00:01:47,716 Tray, don't! 51 00:01:48,586 --> 00:01:49,647 [WHISTLING] 52 00:01:50,188 --> 00:01:52,421 Shay, just Tivo that for me. I'll be right back. 53 00:01:52,457 --> 00:01:53,786 Tray, you promised me. 54 00:01:53,787 --> 00:01:55,427 I'm gonna go get a blunt and a candy bar. 55 00:01:55,460 --> 00:01:56,596 I'll be right back. 56 00:01:57,729 --> 00:01:59,428 Are you serious, Tray? 57 00:01:59,464 --> 00:02:00,563 [DOOR OPENS] 58 00:02:00,598 --> 00:02:01,879 Wait for me! 59 00:02:05,403 --> 00:02:06,469 You got me? 60 00:02:06,504 --> 00:02:08,066 Come on, you know I got you, son. 61 00:02:08,894 --> 00:02:11,090 Bobby, who was badder, Michael or Vito? 62 00:02:11,401 --> 00:02:13,466 - In "Godfather," man. - Vito. 63 00:02:13,912 --> 00:02:16,345 Wrong. I'm gonna give you another shot on the way back. 64 00:02:16,381 --> 00:02:17,487 Think about it. 65 00:02:17,982 --> 00:02:19,715 Yo, why you embarrassing me right now? 66 00:02:19,751 --> 00:02:20,983 You embarrassing me. 67 00:02:21,019 --> 00:02:22,640 Yo, I told you to watch it three times. 68 00:02:23,388 --> 00:02:25,519 [DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE] 69 00:02:27,325 --> 00:02:28,735 [BELL JINGLES] 70 00:02:29,661 --> 00:02:30,738 [DOOR CLOSES] 71 00:02:31,112 --> 00:02:33,930 - Papa! - Yeah, my friend? 72 00:02:33,965 --> 00:02:35,895 - Give me the usual. - Mm. 73 00:02:36,935 --> 00:02:38,634 Guarini's gonna win tonight. 74 00:02:38,670 --> 00:02:40,036 No, no, no, you're wrong. 75 00:02:40,071 --> 00:02:42,538 Watch, his curls is looking kind of tight. 76 00:02:42,574 --> 00:02:43,833 Too tight, huh? 77 00:02:44,210 --> 00:02:45,975 Yeah, well, just make sure you where you're supposed 78 00:02:46,010 --> 00:02:48,202 to be at is all I'm saying. All right. 79 00:02:48,813 --> 00:02:50,880 [MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO] 80 00:02:52,850 --> 00:02:54,083 What's up, Wavy? 81 00:02:54,252 --> 00:02:55,351 Dinner's ready. 82 00:02:55,386 --> 00:02:56,877 Five girls, five boys. 83 00:02:58,084 --> 00:02:59,988 Give me 20 minutes. Watch this, baby. 84 00:03:01,062 --> 00:03:02,725 Don't get cocky, nigga. 85 00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:05,561 [DOGS BARKING IN DISTANCE] 86 00:03:05,597 --> 00:03:07,463 ♪ 87 00:03:07,498 --> 00:03:09,566 Yo, Tivo that for me, Shay! 88 00:03:10,068 --> 00:03:13,279 ♪ 89 00:03:13,515 --> 00:03:15,806 Yo, Tray! Michael! 90 00:03:16,174 --> 00:03:17,354 Michael's badder. 91 00:03:17,646 --> 00:03:18,646 Why? 92 00:03:18,676 --> 00:03:21,401 Uh, 'cause he's not Vito. 93 00:03:21,913 --> 00:03:23,346 Keep trying! 94 00:03:23,381 --> 00:03:27,083 ♪ 95 00:03:27,391 --> 00:03:29,697 Uh, the kid is bugged out. 96 00:03:29,888 --> 00:03:31,287 Hey, what's up? 97 00:03:31,322 --> 00:03:32,322 Boy, girl? 98 00:03:32,357 --> 00:03:34,056 [SIREN CHIRPS, TIRES SQUEAL] 99 00:03:34,092 --> 00:03:35,024 Aww, shit! 100 00:03:35,059 --> 00:03:36,559 - Your hands in the air! - Aw! 101 00:03:36,594 --> 00:03:37,560 Hands up, man! Come on! 102 00:03:37,595 --> 00:03:39,028 NYPD! Put 'em up! 103 00:03:39,063 --> 00:03:41,564 - Hands up! - Keep 'em up! Keep 'em up! 104 00:03:41,599 --> 00:03:43,022 Keep them up! 105 00:03:44,002 --> 00:03:45,956 You have the right to remain silent. 106 00:03:46,304 --> 00:03:52,208 ♪♪ 107 00:03:52,243 --> 00:03:54,034 Ca caw! 108 00:03:55,413 --> 00:04:02,818 ♪♪ 109 00:04:02,854 --> 00:04:04,587 MAN: Do you understand your rights at this time? 110 00:04:04,622 --> 00:04:06,447 TRAY: I didn't do nothing! 111 00:04:07,558 --> 00:04:10,159 [MAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY] 112 00:04:10,194 --> 00:04:12,995 ♪♪ 113 00:04:13,031 --> 00:04:15,398 Sha-a-a-a-a-y! 115 00:04:18,215 --> 00:04:21,671 ♪♪ 116 00:04:21,837 --> 00:04:23,651 That was 15 years ago. 117 00:04:24,556 --> 00:04:26,394 I haven't seen my girl since. 118 00:04:26,871 --> 00:04:28,781 Prison will change a man. 119 00:04:29,253 --> 00:04:30,579 I'm wiser now. 120 00:04:30,615 --> 00:04:32,266 But still, I remain humble. 121 00:04:33,199 --> 00:04:36,134 I also might be the best chef the world has ever known. 122 00:04:36,169 --> 00:04:38,603 You gonna give up that recipe before you go? 123 00:04:38,937 --> 00:04:41,739 If you give a man a fish, he eats dinner. 124 00:04:41,775 --> 00:04:43,074 But if you teach a man to fish... 125 00:04:43,109 --> 00:04:44,709 Yo, yo, there's fish in it? 126 00:04:44,744 --> 00:04:46,544 I'm doing a proverb [BLEEP] 127 00:04:51,985 --> 00:04:53,351 Prison pad Thai. 128 00:04:53,386 --> 00:04:55,053 Don't go overboard on the peanut butter. 129 00:04:55,088 --> 00:04:56,489 Two packets are too much. 130 00:04:59,459 --> 00:05:00,598 [SIGHS] 131 00:05:02,062 --> 00:05:04,028 Now it's time for me to go out to the world 132 00:05:04,064 --> 00:05:06,574 and make it a better place with my sage advice. 133 00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:08,399 Barker, you ready? 134 00:05:08,435 --> 00:05:10,768 Ready as your mother was after I sucked her titties 135 00:05:10,804 --> 00:05:12,303 last night, Wilson. 136 00:05:12,339 --> 00:05:14,639 [DOOR BUZZES] 137 00:05:14,674 --> 00:05:16,240 ♪♪ 138 00:05:16,276 --> 00:05:18,242 Don't let us see you back here, Tray. 139 00:05:18,278 --> 00:05:20,078 Man, I just want to take a shower by myself. 140 00:05:20,113 --> 00:05:22,380 I never want to see another penis in my life, 141 00:05:22,415 --> 00:05:23,548 not even my own. 142 00:05:23,583 --> 00:05:26,484 MAN: Tray! We gonna miss that food, Tray! 143 00:05:26,519 --> 00:05:29,487 Y'all don't deserve my food, you honey bunny eating [BLEEP] 144 00:05:29,522 --> 00:05:31,723 MAN #2: Hey, T-Money leaving the building, y'all! 145 00:05:31,758 --> 00:05:33,057 Hey, give it up! 146 00:05:33,093 --> 00:05:35,426 [CHANTING "TRAY!"] 147 00:05:35,462 --> 00:05:38,429 ♪♪ 148 00:05:38,465 --> 00:05:41,299 TRAY: Second chances are a beautiful thing. 149 00:05:41,334 --> 00:05:43,468 When I went away, my neighborhood was hanging on 150 00:05:43,503 --> 00:05:45,737 by a thread thanks to dealers like me. 151 00:05:45,772 --> 00:05:48,906 This time, I'm gonna be a force for positive change. 152 00:05:48,942 --> 00:05:51,367 This time, I'ma do it right. 153 00:05:51,545 --> 00:05:53,032 [PRISON DOOR SLAMS] 155 00:05:55,476 --> 00:05:57,148 [SIREN WAILS] 156 00:05:57,331 --> 00:06:01,482 ♪♪ 157 00:06:07,289 --> 00:06:09,512 ♪ Hey, yo, I'm back after nine years ♪ 158 00:06:09,513 --> 00:06:11,213 ♪ That's 36 seasons ♪ 159 00:06:11,248 --> 00:06:13,015 ♪ ...is changed up for all types of reasons ♪ 160 00:06:13,050 --> 00:06:14,449 ♪ I want respect ♪ 161 00:06:14,485 --> 00:06:16,251 ♪ These streets was my playground once ♪ 162 00:06:16,286 --> 00:06:18,653 ♪ I was the Mack across the 110th ♪ 163 00:06:18,689 --> 00:06:20,889 - Watch it! - I'm sorry, my bad. 164 00:06:20,924 --> 00:06:22,524 It's not Michelin-starred, it's Michelin-rated. 165 00:06:22,559 --> 00:06:24,059 It's a huge difference. 166 00:06:24,094 --> 00:06:26,531 Honey, have some seaweed. Open up. 167 00:06:26,675 --> 00:06:28,408 Seaweed is alkalizing. 168 00:06:28,448 --> 00:06:29,879 Yes, it's good for digestion. 169 00:06:29,967 --> 00:06:31,840 [BLEEP] happened to Brooklyn?! 170 00:06:31,887 --> 00:06:33,226 Brooklyn! 171 00:06:34,702 --> 00:06:35,702 [SIGHS] 172 00:06:36,632 --> 00:06:37,597 Damn. 173 00:06:37,622 --> 00:06:39,108 Papi's is gone, too. 174 00:06:40,278 --> 00:06:46,883 ♪♪ 175 00:06:48,158 --> 00:06:50,292 Y'all little nigga slingin', huh? 176 00:06:50,327 --> 00:06:51,626 Chasing that paper? 177 00:06:51,627 --> 00:06:53,715 Huh? Get that money, huh? 178 00:06:54,146 --> 00:06:56,562 Then what, huh? 179 00:06:56,854 --> 00:06:58,087 You see me? 180 00:06:58,121 --> 00:07:00,347 I used to be just like y'all little niggas, man. 181 00:07:00,348 --> 00:07:01,881 Just like y'all. 182 00:07:01,915 --> 00:07:04,115 Boom, plot twist. 183 00:07:04,151 --> 00:07:06,217 I got locked up for 15 years. 184 00:07:06,253 --> 00:07:07,719 15 years! 185 00:07:07,983 --> 00:07:11,099 Y'all little niggas need to check your own potential, man. 186 00:07:11,100 --> 00:07:13,638 - Y'all little niggas need... - Actually, sorry to interrupt. 187 00:07:13,663 --> 00:07:15,198 We're just waiting for our friend. 188 00:07:15,223 --> 00:07:18,078 Aah! Let's go to brunch, bitches! 189 00:07:18,177 --> 00:07:19,841 Aah! Come on, bitch! 190 00:07:19,866 --> 00:07:20,814 [LAUGHS] 191 00:07:20,815 --> 00:07:23,748 Oh, my God, that guy was just acting so weird just now. 192 00:07:23,785 --> 00:07:28,947 ♪ You've got a way ♪ 193 00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:29,980 Wow. 194 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:32,053 Shay done pulled a George Jefferson 195 00:07:32,089 --> 00:07:33,247 and moved on up. 196 00:07:33,690 --> 00:07:39,561 ♪ Feeling bad ♪ 197 00:07:39,596 --> 00:07:41,263 ♪ 'Cause you gone away ♪ 198 00:07:41,298 --> 00:07:43,932 Damn, there she is. Looking beautiful. 199 00:07:43,967 --> 00:07:45,834 ♪ I feel so bad ♪ 200 00:07:45,869 --> 00:07:47,729 - Josh? - Coffee? 201 00:07:48,846 --> 00:07:50,378 Oh, she got a roommate. 202 00:07:50,415 --> 00:07:51,881 - There you go. - Thank you. 203 00:07:51,916 --> 00:07:53,216 Mwah. 204 00:07:53,251 --> 00:07:55,918 ♪ Was it something I did wrong? ♪ 205 00:07:55,954 --> 00:07:58,855 ♪ Or is it you found ♪ 206 00:07:58,890 --> 00:08:01,229 [SLOW MOTION] A white dude?! 207 00:08:01,254 --> 00:08:02,439 Aah! 208 00:08:05,363 --> 00:08:08,197 [BIRDS CHIRPING] 209 00:08:08,454 --> 00:08:10,422 [DOORBELL BUZZES] 210 00:08:11,909 --> 00:08:13,075 MULLINS: Dicklicker? 211 00:08:13,110 --> 00:08:15,823 Tray Barker. I'm new. I'm coming in from Southfield. 212 00:08:16,147 --> 00:08:17,946 Come on in, Dicklicker. 213 00:08:17,982 --> 00:08:19,490 [DOOR BUZZES] 214 00:08:20,584 --> 00:08:23,138 So check this out. So I catch up to him, right? 215 00:08:23,139 --> 00:08:25,239 And then I grab him by the back of his head 216 00:08:25,275 --> 00:08:27,208 and tear out three of them grey-ass dreadlocks. 217 00:08:27,483 --> 00:08:28,843 And I say, "Hey, brother." 218 00:08:28,878 --> 00:08:30,812 Look like you outta locks." 219 00:08:30,847 --> 00:08:33,114 [LAUGHS] 220 00:08:33,149 --> 00:08:34,582 You get it? Out of locks. 221 00:08:34,617 --> 00:08:36,417 And that's right off the head. 222 00:08:36,453 --> 00:08:37,718 That's... that's the improv class. 223 00:08:37,754 --> 00:08:39,086 Yo, money grip. This the halfway house 224 00:08:39,122 --> 00:08:41,155 or open mic for fat, black dudes? 225 00:08:41,191 --> 00:08:42,385 Who in here is Mullins? 226 00:08:43,159 --> 00:08:44,625 I'm Mullins, Dicklicker. 227 00:08:44,746 --> 00:08:46,378 I just did 15 years in prison, 228 00:08:46,403 --> 00:08:47,769 and I ain't licked a dick once. 229 00:08:47,804 --> 00:08:49,404 And I ain't gonna start with you, Al Roker. 230 00:08:49,439 --> 00:08:52,231 [LAUGHTER] 231 00:08:53,877 --> 00:08:55,835 Orientation in my office now. 232 00:08:57,740 --> 00:08:59,039 See this place? 233 00:08:59,279 --> 00:09:00,941 This is my castle. 234 00:09:00,976 --> 00:09:02,543 A'ight? I'm the king. 235 00:09:02,578 --> 00:09:04,678 Yeah, well, your castle smell like a group of Jamaicans 236 00:09:04,714 --> 00:09:06,180 in an elevator, slap-boxing. 237 00:09:06,215 --> 00:09:08,315 I like... I like that. I like wittiness. 238 00:09:08,351 --> 00:09:10,217 I like the fact that you think you funny, 239 00:09:10,252 --> 00:09:12,867 but you ain't funny as me, so don't you worry about that. 240 00:09:12,892 --> 00:09:14,503 What you have to understand 241 00:09:14,528 --> 00:09:17,238 is that this well-oiled facility, 242 00:09:17,263 --> 00:09:18,792 I oversee all this. 243 00:09:18,828 --> 00:09:20,192 [PAINTING CLATTERS] 244 00:09:22,187 --> 00:09:23,413 Don't worry about that. 245 00:09:23,593 --> 00:09:24,640 I'll get that later. 246 00:09:25,370 --> 00:09:27,958 All you need to know are the rules. 247 00:09:28,124 --> 00:09:29,305 Rule number one 248 00:09:29,649 --> 00:09:32,558 is all common areas need to stay clean. 249 00:09:32,831 --> 00:09:34,531 Two, make up your bed. 250 00:09:34,566 --> 00:09:37,200 Three, never find yourself in trouble. 251 00:09:37,235 --> 00:09:39,875 Four, no playing with your plantain. 252 00:09:40,038 --> 00:09:42,505 Five, no fornicating after 4:00. 253 00:09:42,541 --> 00:09:46,610 And six, always make your curfew, otherwise, you out. 254 00:09:46,645 --> 00:09:49,646 I just found out the woman that I love is with a white dude. 255 00:09:49,681 --> 00:09:51,681 Look like a Duke lacrosse player. 256 00:09:51,717 --> 00:09:52,849 What, you surprised? 257 00:09:52,884 --> 00:09:54,751 You thought she was just gonna wait for you? 258 00:09:54,786 --> 00:09:56,029 [LAUGHS] 259 00:09:56,092 --> 00:09:57,654 Shit, man. 260 00:09:57,689 --> 00:10:00,624 I'm gonna say this to you, and this is not 261 00:10:00,659 --> 00:10:03,527 a sexist comment at all, but all women 262 00:10:03,771 --> 00:10:05,204 are petty as [BLEEP] 263 00:10:05,239 --> 00:10:06,672 Hell no, not Shay! 264 00:10:06,925 --> 00:10:08,649 Okay? She's my queen. 265 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:10,859 She just got lost. 266 00:10:10,895 --> 00:10:14,262 Yeah, she got lost on another man's bouncy house. [LAUGHS] 267 00:10:14,524 --> 00:10:16,658 Why everything with you gotta be about dick? 268 00:10:16,693 --> 00:10:19,461 What?! The phallus is the number one piece 269 00:10:19,496 --> 00:10:21,697 of universal comedy gold. 270 00:10:22,086 --> 00:10:23,643 Everybody love a good dick joke. 271 00:10:23,900 --> 00:10:25,533 You know it's like Tom, Dick, and Harry. 272 00:10:25,569 --> 00:10:26,735 You heard about that, right? 273 00:10:26,770 --> 00:10:28,036 Nobody gives a shit about Harry. 274 00:10:28,071 --> 00:10:29,137 Everybody want to know who Dick is. 275 00:10:29,172 --> 00:10:31,339 I'm not here to laugh, okay? 276 00:10:31,375 --> 00:10:32,557 I'm here to inspire. 277 00:10:33,276 --> 00:10:34,943 I'm hear to teach young, at-risk kids. 278 00:10:34,978 --> 00:10:37,479 TOGETHER: On the verge of making the same mistake... 279 00:10:37,514 --> 00:10:38,880 as you did. Ah, come on, man. 280 00:10:38,915 --> 00:10:40,715 You don't think I haven't heard this before? 281 00:10:40,751 --> 00:10:42,825 You just another dusty-ass street prophet. 282 00:10:43,453 --> 00:10:46,388 Every fool-ass convict come through that door 283 00:10:46,423 --> 00:10:48,690 think that they Laurence Fishburne 284 00:10:48,725 --> 00:10:50,025 in "Boyz N the Hood." 285 00:10:50,135 --> 00:10:52,193 Then they find out the 'hood gone. 286 00:10:52,229 --> 00:10:54,162 Man, the neighborhood's been gentrified. 287 00:10:54,197 --> 00:10:56,126 What you need to be concerned with 288 00:10:56,266 --> 00:10:58,933 is getting caught in some recidivism. 289 00:10:58,969 --> 00:10:59,934 Some what? 290 00:10:59,970 --> 00:11:01,490 [STAMMERING] Re-cid-ivism. 291 00:11:01,491 --> 00:11:02,871 Recidivism. 292 00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:05,110 That's what I said. 293 00:11:06,576 --> 00:11:08,639 Fine. Come on, let's take a walk, man. 294 00:11:09,312 --> 00:11:11,913 Ah, don't you put your hand in [BLEEP] candy corn. 295 00:11:11,948 --> 00:11:13,248 Don't touch my shit. 296 00:11:13,517 --> 00:11:15,684 At the same time, we need to, spiritually speaking... 297 00:11:15,719 --> 00:11:17,252 - Okay. - Focus on how we contribute 298 00:11:17,287 --> 00:11:18,520 - two cents... - Here they go. 299 00:11:18,555 --> 00:11:20,055 Here they go right here. This is exactly 300 00:11:20,090 --> 00:11:21,356 what I'm talking about, Barker. 301 00:11:21,391 --> 00:11:23,124 Too many mentors. Not enough mentees. 302 00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:24,726 Jaybird, Felony, meet Tray. 303 00:11:24,761 --> 00:11:25,727 - 'Sup? - 'Sup? 304 00:11:25,762 --> 00:11:27,429 'Sup? I look forward to guiding y'all 305 00:11:27,464 --> 00:11:28,863 on your personal journeys. 306 00:11:28,899 --> 00:11:30,565 You can guide me, but you can walk with me... 307 00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:32,267 But what is a journey but a beginning, middle, and end... 308 00:11:32,302 --> 00:11:33,635 Shut the [BLEEP] up. Come on. 309 00:11:33,670 --> 00:11:36,971 This is the barracks. You're bunk number five. 310 00:11:37,145 --> 00:11:40,141 Name's Erwin, but everybody call me Big Country. 311 00:11:40,177 --> 00:11:41,342 Big Country? 312 00:11:41,376 --> 00:11:42,711 Well, we gonna have to swap bunks, man. 313 00:11:42,746 --> 00:11:44,179 I'm not trying to die tonight. 314 00:11:44,214 --> 00:11:45,980 [LAUGHS] You're funny, man. 315 00:11:46,016 --> 00:11:48,650 Funny? What the hell? You want to hear some funny? 316 00:11:48,685 --> 00:11:50,485 All right, I got a good one for you right here. 317 00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:53,571 What's the difference between a hard-on and a Bugatti? 318 00:11:54,925 --> 00:11:56,558 I don't have a Bugatti. 319 00:11:56,593 --> 00:11:59,633 [LAUGHS] 320 00:12:00,372 --> 00:12:02,697 You mean to tell me you got an erection right now? 321 00:12:02,733 --> 00:12:04,332 No. You know what? 322 00:12:04,367 --> 00:12:06,601 You got one week to find a job, otherwise, you outta here. 323 00:12:06,636 --> 00:12:08,002 I ain't got no damn erection. 324 00:12:08,038 --> 00:12:09,604 Ask me about no erection. 325 00:12:09,639 --> 00:12:12,107 If that thing lasts more than four hours, call a doctor. 326 00:12:12,142 --> 00:12:14,498 - [LAUGHS] - What up, Big Country? 327 00:12:14,523 --> 00:12:15,845 What's up, Tray? 328 00:12:16,346 --> 00:12:18,079 [SNORING] 329 00:12:18,115 --> 00:12:21,683 [SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE] 330 00:12:21,718 --> 00:12:24,886 ♪♪ 331 00:12:24,921 --> 00:12:25,985 I love you. 332 00:12:26,990 --> 00:12:28,379 I love you, baby. 333 00:12:29,126 --> 00:12:30,774 Can I make love to her? 334 00:12:30,961 --> 00:12:32,193 [GASPS] No, man! 335 00:12:32,433 --> 00:12:33,865 Get out my face, man. 336 00:12:33,901 --> 00:12:36,353 Get your nuts out my face, please. 337 00:12:36,864 --> 00:12:37,936 Gustavo. 338 00:12:37,937 --> 00:12:39,940 Yeah, thank you, Gustavo. Please leave. 339 00:12:42,965 --> 00:12:43,974 Now! 340 00:12:44,009 --> 00:12:45,732 Okay, okay. 341 00:12:45,978 --> 00:12:53,978 ♪♪ 342 00:12:55,020 --> 00:12:56,214 Damn, Clyde. 343 00:12:57,446 --> 00:12:59,146 When I heard you got murdered, man, 344 00:12:59,181 --> 00:13:01,351 I cried for days in my cell, man. 345 00:13:03,693 --> 00:13:04,971 I should have been there. 346 00:13:05,154 --> 00:13:07,721 Now it seem like the whole world done moved on, man. 347 00:13:08,276 --> 00:13:10,490 I feel like Rip Van Winkle in this [BLEEP] 348 00:13:10,526 --> 00:13:12,328 And I don't even know who he is! 349 00:13:13,239 --> 00:13:15,347 But I know if you was here, 350 00:13:16,601 --> 00:13:18,334 you'd probably say some shit like... 351 00:13:18,369 --> 00:13:19,596 BOBBY: Yo, Tray! 352 00:13:20,471 --> 00:13:21,604 Clyde?! 353 00:13:21,639 --> 00:13:23,011 Yo, behind you! 354 00:13:25,109 --> 00:13:26,208 Clyde?! 355 00:13:26,244 --> 00:13:28,023 Nah, man, it's me, Bobby. 356 00:13:28,412 --> 00:13:29,575 Clyde's little brother. 357 00:13:29,576 --> 00:13:31,026 Oh, that's what's up. 358 00:13:32,769 --> 00:13:33,788 [THUD] 359 00:13:34,578 --> 00:13:35,703 Tray? 360 00:13:36,313 --> 00:13:37,483 Fredo! 361 00:13:39,178 --> 00:13:40,272 What's that? 362 00:13:40,297 --> 00:13:41,817 Michael killed Fredo, his own brother. 363 00:13:42,175 --> 00:13:44,241 That's what made him badder, you know what I'm saying? 364 00:13:44,277 --> 00:13:47,018 You remember asking me who was badder in "Godfather," 365 00:13:47,019 --> 00:13:48,157 Michael or Vito. 366 00:13:48,989 --> 00:13:50,317 - I remember. - Yeah. 367 00:13:51,257 --> 00:13:52,724 That's when he became a villain. 368 00:13:53,627 --> 00:13:56,193 You never sacrifice your family for the life. 369 00:13:56,430 --> 00:13:58,206 Yeah, that's real right there, son. 370 00:13:59,785 --> 00:14:02,200 The last time I saw you, you were... 371 00:14:02,235 --> 00:14:03,605 Like 14, 15. 372 00:14:03,704 --> 00:14:05,370 Yeah, now look at you, man. 373 00:14:05,405 --> 00:14:07,939 Looking like a broke-ass Tupac... One-pac. 374 00:14:07,975 --> 00:14:09,507 Oh, oh, okay. 375 00:14:09,543 --> 00:14:11,977 All right, well, um, you the one out here looking elderly. 376 00:14:12,012 --> 00:14:13,411 - [CHUCKLES] No. - Looking like 377 00:14:13,447 --> 00:14:15,280 you passing out from calcium deficiency. 378 00:14:15,315 --> 00:14:17,115 You looking like Sgt. Slaughter's 379 00:14:17,150 --> 00:14:18,316 illegitimate son. 380 00:14:18,352 --> 00:14:20,778 You look like, uh, Chicken George 381 00:14:21,054 --> 00:14:23,088 - at the end of "Roots." - [LAUGHS] 382 00:14:23,123 --> 00:14:24,856 You got one arm longer than the other, 383 00:14:24,891 --> 00:14:26,191 and you clap like this. 384 00:14:26,226 --> 00:14:28,593 [LAUGHS] Oh, okay. So, is that you? 385 00:14:28,629 --> 00:14:30,821 - 'Cause you smell so bad... - Shut up, man! 386 00:14:30,878 --> 00:14:32,258 I got a gland problem. 387 00:14:33,834 --> 00:14:35,000 My... My bad. 388 00:14:35,035 --> 00:14:37,202 I thought you outgrow that type of stuff. 389 00:14:37,237 --> 00:14:39,070 I ain't... I ain't... 390 00:14:39,106 --> 00:14:40,191 What you been doing? 391 00:14:40,706 --> 00:14:42,239 Well, you know, I'm doing the same old same. 392 00:14:42,273 --> 00:14:44,655 You know, business been slow, weed game is kind of... 393 00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:46,501 - It's been tight, man. - Still slingin'? 394 00:14:47,353 --> 00:14:48,719 You gonna end up in prison, Bobby. 395 00:14:48,754 --> 00:14:50,654 Look, ain't nobody scared of jail. 396 00:14:50,689 --> 00:14:52,723 Look, I know mad people in there. 397 00:14:52,758 --> 00:14:54,658 Plus, all they do is rap and work out. 398 00:14:54,823 --> 00:14:58,464 In prison, as pretty as you are, you would be a perfect 10. 399 00:14:59,809 --> 00:15:00,931 Thank you, man. 400 00:15:00,966 --> 00:15:03,282 That's... that's not good, Bobby. 401 00:15:03,536 --> 00:15:06,904 They will turn your butthole into a parking garage. 402 00:15:07,056 --> 00:15:09,506 Start putting all kind of cars in there, man. 403 00:15:09,542 --> 00:15:12,859 Buicks, Cutlass Sierras, Oldsmobiles. 404 00:15:13,345 --> 00:15:15,078 Somebody gonna put a Hummer in there. 405 00:15:15,114 --> 00:15:16,847 You don't want nobody parking no Hummer in there. 406 00:15:16,882 --> 00:15:18,749 - I don't want no Hummer. - No, man. 407 00:15:18,784 --> 00:15:20,918 You don't want your rectum turned into 408 00:15:20,953 --> 00:15:22,085 a parking garage, man. 409 00:15:22,121 --> 00:15:23,381 That's not what you want. 410 00:15:24,247 --> 00:15:26,634 You don't want nobody parking no Hummer in there, man. 411 00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:28,967 This is my neighborhood, man. 412 00:15:29,361 --> 00:15:30,547 Things done changed. 413 00:15:31,199 --> 00:15:32,991 Just like "Planet of the Apes," man. 414 00:15:34,029 --> 00:15:35,172 Weird. 415 00:15:35,631 --> 00:15:39,001 Like when Zira was talking to Dr. Zaius, and she said, 416 00:15:39,091 --> 00:15:41,302 "What do you think they'll find out there, Doctor?" 417 00:15:41,303 --> 00:15:43,470 And he said, "Their destiny." 418 00:15:45,674 --> 00:15:47,341 The worst part is with Shay, man. 419 00:15:47,376 --> 00:15:49,146 She done moved on and got a new man. 420 00:15:49,171 --> 00:15:50,678 Hey, what is you talking about? 421 00:15:50,713 --> 00:15:53,385 What happened to the dude that I knew, that I idolized? 422 00:15:53,716 --> 00:15:55,681 You Big Tray Diesel, man. 423 00:15:55,682 --> 00:15:57,274 Go get your girl, Tray. 424 00:15:58,684 --> 00:16:00,283 I wouldn't even know where to begin. 425 00:16:00,320 --> 00:16:01,586 Look, we do it like everybody else. 426 00:16:01,621 --> 00:16:03,287 We start from the beginning. 427 00:16:03,323 --> 00:16:04,288 With God. 428 00:16:04,324 --> 00:16:05,324 No. 429 00:16:06,004 --> 00:16:07,268 The Internet. 430 00:16:09,146 --> 00:16:12,815 [MUSIC PLAYING] 431 00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:15,296 ♪ Ooh, won't you believe ♪ 432 00:16:15,297 --> 00:16:17,597 ♪ I will love you through infinity ♪ 433 00:16:17,632 --> 00:16:20,266 [APPLAUSE] 434 00:16:20,302 --> 00:16:23,236 ♪ I will love you through infinity ♪ 435 00:16:23,271 --> 00:16:24,632 Shay Shay. 436 00:16:25,334 --> 00:16:28,055 Welcome, everyone, and thank you so much for being here. 437 00:16:28,802 --> 00:16:30,560 I'm gonna bring it down for a sec. 438 00:16:31,495 --> 00:16:33,502 The U.S. has over 439 00:16:33,527 --> 00:16:35,948 600,000 homeless. 440 00:16:36,284 --> 00:16:37,884 These are our friends. 441 00:16:38,282 --> 00:16:39,952 Our family members. 442 00:16:39,988 --> 00:16:40,988 Our... 443 00:16:41,022 --> 00:16:42,994 [BOTTLE RATTLES] 444 00:16:43,825 --> 00:16:45,325 Ex-convicts. 445 00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:47,193 Doing time in the house! 446 00:16:47,228 --> 00:16:48,604 - [CROWD MURMURING] - They are us. 447 00:16:49,030 --> 00:16:50,596 That is why I am so very proud 448 00:16:50,632 --> 00:16:53,132 to be a part of the Rest Easy Initiative. 449 00:16:53,168 --> 00:16:54,779 You tell 'em, Shay! 450 00:16:55,621 --> 00:16:58,321 We've already raised enough money to buy 451 00:16:58,356 --> 00:17:00,289 over 2,000 brand-new beds. 452 00:17:00,324 --> 00:17:01,590 Yes, yes, y'all! 453 00:17:01,626 --> 00:17:03,883 But there is so much more that we can do. 454 00:17:03,908 --> 00:17:04,894 I heard that. 455 00:17:04,929 --> 00:17:08,133 We will eradicate homelessness. 456 00:17:08,134 --> 00:17:09,173 Damn right. 457 00:17:09,174 --> 00:17:11,007 One bed at a time. 458 00:17:11,042 --> 00:17:12,409 - [APPLAUSE] - Thank you. 459 00:17:12,444 --> 00:17:13,943 You're welcome. 460 00:17:13,979 --> 00:17:15,459 Thank you so much. 461 00:17:15,747 --> 00:17:18,698 [MUSIC RESUMES] 462 00:17:20,285 --> 00:17:22,142 That was quite the speech, Shannon. 463 00:17:22,183 --> 00:17:23,554 So articulate. 464 00:17:23,884 --> 00:17:25,751 You should think about politics. 465 00:17:25,786 --> 00:17:27,019 - Excuse me. - You have a gift. 466 00:17:27,054 --> 00:17:28,787 I'll let you guys finish in just two seconds. 467 00:17:28,823 --> 00:17:30,856 Shay, I just want to say it's me, Tray. 468 00:17:30,891 --> 00:17:32,658 I'm back. And I just want to say, 469 00:17:32,693 --> 00:17:34,174 you know, even though you didn't come visit me, 470 00:17:34,273 --> 00:17:36,057 15 years I was incarcerated, 471 00:17:36,708 --> 00:17:37,893 all is forgiven. 472 00:17:38,603 --> 00:17:39,883 Come here and give me some love. 473 00:17:40,112 --> 00:17:42,319 [LAUGHS] 474 00:17:43,571 --> 00:17:46,769 Tray, you are quite the funny man. 475 00:17:47,158 --> 00:17:49,092 You know, he's one of our former homeless. 476 00:17:49,452 --> 00:17:51,594 Can you excuse us for just a second? 477 00:17:51,629 --> 00:17:52,843 Indeed. 478 00:17:52,997 --> 00:17:54,630 - Come on, Shay, come on. - Shh! 479 00:17:54,666 --> 00:17:57,255 This is velour, man. This is velour! 480 00:17:57,889 --> 00:18:00,203 You all pink champagne'd up now, huh? 481 00:18:00,354 --> 00:18:01,425 Nigga, 482 00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:04,551 you got some nerve thinking you can crash my event. 483 00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:06,082 How dare you! 484 00:18:06,199 --> 00:18:07,805 Damn, hello to you, too. 485 00:18:08,613 --> 00:18:11,549 - Shannon? - I tried to stop him, Shannon. 486 00:18:12,383 --> 00:18:13,983 Everything good? You okay? 487 00:18:14,187 --> 00:18:16,321 She all right, home boy. I'm gonna send her to you soon. 488 00:18:16,356 --> 00:18:18,323 I'm sorry, are we gonna have to tussle, hombre? 489 00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:21,293 Tussle? Hombre? What the [BLEEP] is this, "West Side Story"? 490 00:18:21,328 --> 00:18:22,532 - Josh. - Yeah? 491 00:18:22,533 --> 00:18:24,800 Sweetie bear, please wait for me inside. 492 00:18:24,834 --> 00:18:26,634 Yeah, go on in and have some of that pink stuff. 493 00:18:26,669 --> 00:18:27,902 It looked delicious. 494 00:18:27,937 --> 00:18:29,737 - I got this. - Hey, I'm watching you. 495 00:18:29,772 --> 00:18:31,486 I'm watching you, too, mangina. 496 00:18:31,774 --> 00:18:33,365 I am not a mangina. 497 00:18:33,676 --> 00:18:35,210 I'm just a regular man. 498 00:18:39,582 --> 00:18:41,389 At last by ourselves. 499 00:18:41,584 --> 00:18:42,827 [LAUGHS] 500 00:18:43,342 --> 00:18:44,685 15 years you been outta my life, 501 00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:45,886 you think you're just gonna be able 502 00:18:45,922 --> 00:18:47,521 to walk right back in it, huh? 503 00:18:47,557 --> 00:18:48,522 Hell no! 504 00:18:48,558 --> 00:18:49,657 There's the old Shay. 505 00:18:49,692 --> 00:18:51,926 I got by Shannon now, not Shay. 506 00:18:51,961 --> 00:18:53,961 You calling yourself by your government name now? 507 00:18:53,996 --> 00:18:57,531 Bitch, do you know how hard I had to work 508 00:18:57,567 --> 00:18:58,966 to pull myself up out the gutter? 509 00:18:59,001 --> 00:19:00,568 How long did it take for you to marry 510 00:19:00,603 --> 00:19:01,569 that white man in there? 511 00:19:01,604 --> 00:19:03,082 Josh is a good man. 512 00:19:03,873 --> 00:19:05,673 He writes voiceovers for Anthony Bourdain. 513 00:19:05,708 --> 00:19:06,974 Yeah, but do you love him, though? 514 00:19:07,009 --> 00:19:08,215 Yes, I do. 515 00:19:13,416 --> 00:19:14,614 [DOOR OPENS] 516 00:19:14,615 --> 00:19:15,635 SHAHZAD: Mom! 517 00:19:15,850 --> 00:19:17,772 Amira's trying to poison me with peanuts. 518 00:19:17,797 --> 00:19:19,518 I am not. Yes, you are! 519 00:19:19,554 --> 00:19:22,588 Amira, Shahzad, go inside with your father now. 520 00:19:22,918 --> 00:19:24,384 Are you okay? I'm fine. 521 00:19:24,420 --> 00:19:26,505 Go inside right now. 522 00:19:31,575 --> 00:19:32,726 Tray, I know what you want to say. 523 00:19:32,761 --> 00:19:34,142 How old are they? 524 00:19:34,296 --> 00:19:35,662 - 15. - Twins? 525 00:19:35,868 --> 00:19:37,998 - Tray... - Scientifically speaking, 526 00:19:38,033 --> 00:19:40,701 how did you and a Caucasian man make two kids 527 00:19:40,736 --> 00:19:42,970 whose last name could be Wesley and Snipes? 528 00:19:43,005 --> 00:19:45,309 - Good night, Shannon! - [LAUGHS] 529 00:19:45,334 --> 00:19:47,641 Good night, Mr. and Mrs. Washington. 530 00:19:47,676 --> 00:19:49,176 Your support is appreciated. 531 00:19:49,211 --> 00:19:52,746 When I get home, I'm going to write you a very large check! 532 00:19:52,781 --> 00:19:54,581 Oh, you are so kind. 533 00:19:54,617 --> 00:19:55,975 [LAUGHS] 534 00:19:55,976 --> 00:19:57,442 Listen to me, Tray. 535 00:19:57,477 --> 00:19:59,381 Those kids didn't grow up the way that we did. 536 00:19:59,406 --> 00:20:01,888 They got nice friends. They go to a nice school. 537 00:20:01,913 --> 00:20:03,929 If those are my kids, I deserve to know. 538 00:20:04,317 --> 00:20:05,784 Two, three, four... 539 00:20:05,819 --> 00:20:07,452 ♪ Since you been gone ♪ 540 00:20:07,487 --> 00:20:09,320 - Not now, Bobby! - Say what?! 541 00:20:09,356 --> 00:20:11,423 - Not right now! - This the loudest it go! 542 00:20:12,376 --> 00:20:13,901 Look, I told you not to leave. 543 00:20:14,127 --> 00:20:15,927 I told you not to go out there and sell that rock, 544 00:20:15,962 --> 00:20:17,305 but you went, anyway. 545 00:20:17,573 --> 00:20:18,839 You could have gave them Wavy. 546 00:20:18,874 --> 00:20:19,909 I don't snitch. 547 00:20:19,910 --> 00:20:22,144 And that's why I didn't tell you about the kids, Tray. 548 00:20:22,178 --> 00:20:24,612 Because wherever you go, you bring chaos! 549 00:20:24,647 --> 00:20:25,855 I don't bring chaos! 550 00:20:25,856 --> 00:20:26,856 Yes, you do! 551 00:20:26,883 --> 00:20:28,616 - Huh?! - Not now, Bobby! 552 00:20:28,651 --> 00:20:29,775 Oh, oh, okay. 553 00:20:30,219 --> 00:20:31,552 ♪ You say ♪ 554 00:20:31,587 --> 00:20:33,487 [TIRES SQUEAL] 555 00:20:33,523 --> 00:20:36,019 ♪♪ 556 00:20:36,020 --> 00:20:38,354 - Oh! Oh! - What happened? 557 00:20:38,389 --> 00:20:42,024 Oh, look, my bad, Tray! 558 00:20:42,060 --> 00:20:43,726 You look gorgeous, Shay! 559 00:20:43,761 --> 00:20:46,095 Um, oh, you all right, man. 560 00:20:46,130 --> 00:20:47,997 Oh, yeah, you go ahead, walk this off, baby. 561 00:20:48,032 --> 00:20:49,550 You gonna be just fine. 562 00:20:49,575 --> 00:20:50,933 God damn it, Tray! 563 00:20:51,282 --> 00:20:52,782 You ain't changed a bit! 564 00:20:53,293 --> 00:20:54,584 - He's fine! - Oh! 565 00:20:54,619 --> 00:20:57,800 Come on, come on, come on, inside. 566 00:21:01,868 --> 00:21:05,395 ♪ Since you been gone ♪ 567 00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:06,496 I'm a father. 568 00:21:06,531 --> 00:21:07,930 ♪ Since you been gone ♪ 569 00:21:07,966 --> 00:21:09,343 Harold! 570 00:21:09,601 --> 00:21:11,704 - [SIREN WAILS] - I'm a father.