1 00:00:07,780 --> 00:00:08,656 Hey, bud. 2 00:00:09,031 --> 00:00:12,243 Brought you some decaf hazelnut anti-matter. 3 00:00:12,827 --> 00:00:14,995 Just a little treat for my ol' pal, the Doorman. 4 00:00:15,704 --> 00:00:17,665 Headin' back down, by the way... Ahem. 5 00:00:18,958 --> 00:00:21,544 You sure the Judge is OK with you going back to Earth so many times? 6 00:00:21,585 --> 00:00:23,921 Oh, yeah, all good. See? 7 00:00:24,421 --> 00:00:25,756 Still got the papers. 8 00:00:25,965 --> 00:00:26,882 Shouldn't be long. 9 00:00:36,225 --> 00:00:37,226 How are we doing, Steve? 10 00:00:37,393 --> 00:00:39,228 I'm trying, I'm getting close. 11 00:00:39,812 --> 00:00:41,897 - Good, no pressure. - COMPUTER BEEPS 12 00:00:44,608 --> 00:00:46,110 - COMPUTER BEEPS - A-ha! 13 00:00:46,193 --> 00:00:47,987 Someone just went down to Earth 14 00:00:48,070 --> 00:00:50,489 and that gave me a back door to the Judge's system. 15 00:00:50,614 --> 00:00:53,325 Now we can see everything that's happening with all four humans. 16 00:00:53,993 --> 00:00:55,077 HE WINCES 17 00:00:55,161 --> 00:00:56,787 - Excellent work, Steve. - HE SIGHS 18 00:00:59,498 --> 00:01:02,418 Uh-oh, looks like someone's been cocooning again. 19 00:01:02,751 --> 00:01:05,963 You know, it would be a real help if you let me know the next time you're about to-- 20 00:01:10,801 --> 00:01:12,428 Well, well, well... 21 00:01:13,137 --> 00:01:15,681 looks like Michael's been caught with his hand in the human jar. 22 00:01:15,931 --> 00:01:17,850 COCOON: Good one, boss! - Shut up, Glenn! 23 00:01:25,441 --> 00:01:26,692 ELEANOR: Morning, Teach! 24 00:01:26,775 --> 00:01:28,277 Ready to discuss philosophy! 25 00:01:28,569 --> 00:01:30,905 Obviously, I'm kidding, how was your date with Simone? 26 00:01:31,071 --> 00:01:32,072 Spill it, sweetheart. 27 00:01:32,448 --> 00:01:34,575 We had a great time. Thank you, again 28 00:01:34,658 --> 00:01:36,702 for bullying me into asking her out. 29 00:01:36,827 --> 00:01:38,078 Well, I owed it to you. 30 00:01:38,871 --> 00:01:42,833 And, bonus, I realised I was practising virtue ethics 31 00:01:42,917 --> 00:01:44,710 by helping the two of you bone down. 32 00:01:44,919 --> 00:01:48,422 OK, not appropriate, also not a great understanding of virtue ethics. 33 00:01:48,589 --> 00:01:50,925 - Well, we can agree to disagree. - But, if you must know... 34 00:01:51,342 --> 00:01:53,427 it was very chaste, we didn't even kiss. 35 00:01:54,887 --> 00:01:57,181 - Because you chickened out? - I did, yeah! 36 00:01:57,264 --> 00:02:00,559 I totally chickened out and I am so mad at myself. 37 00:02:00,768 --> 00:02:01,727 Well, hey... 38 00:02:01,977 --> 00:02:03,562 Maybe it wasn't the right moment. 39 00:02:04,021 --> 00:02:06,607 Knowing the two of you nerds, your first kiss is gonna be 40 00:02:06,690 --> 00:02:09,109 while reading Plato in an MRI machine. 41 00:02:09,235 --> 00:02:10,110 HE CHUCKLES 42 00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:13,155 Oh, hang on. 43 00:02:13,781 --> 00:02:14,657 Come with me. 44 00:02:15,324 --> 00:02:18,160 Simone, what's the one thing Eleanor and I have in common? 45 00:02:18,244 --> 00:02:20,371 You both have a complete disregard for my office hours? 46 00:02:20,412 --> 00:02:21,789 - Sorry, Reginald. - Ah, no worries. 47 00:02:21,872 --> 00:02:23,207 Look, listen, Eleanor is 48 00:02:23,290 --> 00:02:24,625 - an Arizona trash bag... - Yep. 49 00:02:24,708 --> 00:02:25,834 - Her words, not mine. - Totally. 50 00:02:25,918 --> 00:02:27,753 Who has a complete disregard for ethics 51 00:02:28,003 --> 00:02:29,797 and once told me that her greatest accomplishment was 52 00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:31,507 breaking into Charles Barkley's house. 53 00:02:31,632 --> 00:02:35,010 Mm, he was on the road, I snuck in through the doggy door 54 00:02:35,094 --> 00:02:36,887 tried on all his giant shoes... 55 00:02:36,971 --> 00:02:38,555 One of my top five Christmases. 56 00:02:38,681 --> 00:02:40,516 Listen, the point is... 57 00:02:40,683 --> 00:02:43,394 Eleanor and I have nothing in common 58 00:02:43,477 --> 00:02:47,106 except that we both almost died and it made us want to be better people. 59 00:02:47,564 --> 00:02:48,941 This is my thesis idea. 60 00:02:49,108 --> 00:02:52,528 I will explore the effect of near death experiences 61 00:02:52,611 --> 00:02:54,238 on ethical decision making. 62 00:02:54,321 --> 00:02:57,491 I will get a group of people together who have had near death experiences 63 00:02:57,574 --> 00:03:00,411 ask them ethical questions and see if there's any commonality. 64 00:03:00,619 --> 00:03:01,578 That's great. 65 00:03:01,912 --> 00:03:03,330 Why are you yelling it at me? 66 00:03:03,414 --> 00:03:07,835 Because I need your help! You and your magic brain scan machine. 67 00:03:08,085 --> 00:03:09,795 Oh, of course! 68 00:03:10,004 --> 00:03:11,964 A joint study with the neuroscience department. 69 00:03:12,172 --> 00:03:14,008 We can use MRI mapping to see if 70 00:03:14,091 --> 00:03:15,676 a near death experience alters brain function. 71 00:03:15,801 --> 00:03:17,136 CHIDI: There's something there, right? 72 00:03:17,261 --> 00:03:18,470 Definitely, I love this. 73 00:03:18,554 --> 00:03:20,180 Great. Also, I wanted to kiss you last night 74 00:03:20,222 --> 00:03:21,432 but I chickened out, so I'm gonna kiss you now. 75 00:03:21,515 --> 00:03:22,725 Good, yes, I want that, please. 76 00:03:28,397 --> 00:03:30,149 Oh, sorry Reginald. 77 00:03:30,357 --> 00:03:33,319 - What were you saying? - Um, that I can't come to class tomorrow 78 00:03:33,402 --> 00:03:34,486 cos my grandma died. 79 00:03:34,778 --> 00:03:35,738 Ouf! 80 00:03:36,196 --> 00:03:37,614 Real mood ruiner! 81 00:03:38,073 --> 00:03:39,616 Read the room, dude! 82 00:03:47,416 --> 00:03:48,500 Bingo! 83 00:03:49,251 --> 00:03:50,169 OK. 84 00:03:52,504 --> 00:03:53,589 Oh, good, you're here. 85 00:03:53,797 --> 00:03:57,384 Eleanor, meet the newest member of our ethical neuroscientific study 86 00:03:57,468 --> 00:03:58,469 Tahani Al-Jamil. 87 00:03:58,761 --> 00:04:01,263 Hello, Eleanor. Delighted to meet you. 88 00:04:01,889 --> 00:04:04,725 Al-Jamil, oh... you're Camila's sister! 89 00:04:05,434 --> 00:04:06,894 I am, yes. 90 00:04:06,977 --> 00:04:09,980 If you want an autograph or something, I can probably arrange it. 91 00:04:10,064 --> 00:04:11,940 Eh, I was never really that into her. 92 00:04:12,024 --> 00:04:12,941 No offence. 93 00:04:13,317 --> 00:04:17,404 Oh, I assure you, there is none taken. 94 00:04:17,696 --> 00:04:20,032 So, how did you come to join our team? 95 00:04:20,199 --> 00:04:23,410 Well, it's a bit of a story, I suppose. 96 00:04:23,994 --> 00:04:25,746 It began about a year ago. 97 00:04:36,799 --> 00:04:37,883 Well done, Tahani. 98 00:04:38,384 --> 00:04:39,385 Who saved me? 99 00:04:39,802 --> 00:04:41,512 Did anyone see who just saved my life? 100 00:04:41,595 --> 00:04:44,139 WOMAN: It was Camila! - No, it was a man, I think. 101 00:04:44,223 --> 00:04:45,182 WOMAN: It was Camila! 102 00:04:45,516 --> 00:04:48,310 CROWD SHOUTS: Camila! - No, it wasn't Camila! 103 00:04:48,435 --> 00:04:49,978 It was someone over there. 104 00:04:50,646 --> 00:04:53,065 CROWD CHANTS: Camila! Camila! Camila! 105 00:04:55,901 --> 00:04:57,694 TAHANI (VO): I had almost died. 106 00:04:58,695 --> 00:04:59,988 In that very moment 107 00:05:00,531 --> 00:05:02,324 I decided to change my life. 108 00:05:02,866 --> 00:05:07,538 First I cleansed myself of all the worldly possessions that had been weighing me down 109 00:05:07,621 --> 00:05:11,834 like anchors: the dresses, the jewels. I gave them all to good Will. 110 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:15,754 That's what I call Prince William. Since he'd married a commoner I... 111 00:05:16,463 --> 00:05:19,049 assumed he knew some needy people they could go to. 112 00:05:20,050 --> 00:05:20,926 Sure. 113 00:05:21,051 --> 00:05:24,805 TAHANI (VO): Then I deleted all my celebrity contacts from my mobile. 114 00:05:25,055 --> 00:05:26,140 Goodbye, Bono. 115 00:05:27,224 --> 00:05:28,559 Goodbye, The Edge. 116 00:05:29,726 --> 00:05:32,604 Goodbye, The Edge's real phone number that even Bono doesn't have. 117 00:05:33,021 --> 00:05:37,401 TAHANI (VO): And most importantly, I put physical distance between me and my old life. 118 00:05:37,776 --> 00:05:39,194 Book me a flight to Tibet. 119 00:05:39,361 --> 00:05:41,155 I'm going to live in a Buddhist monastery. 120 00:05:41,321 --> 00:05:42,948 I need to get out of the spotlight. 121 00:05:43,157 --> 00:05:45,075 Copy that, I'll see what jets are available. 122 00:05:45,701 --> 00:05:47,536 No, I'm flying commercial. 123 00:05:47,619 --> 00:05:49,913 - OK, first class, I assume? - No. 124 00:05:50,247 --> 00:05:52,499 I'm a woman of the people now. 125 00:05:55,002 --> 00:05:56,628 Comfort plus. 126 00:05:58,755 --> 00:06:01,592 TAHANI (VO): And there, in that humble monastery 127 00:06:02,342 --> 00:06:05,512 thousands of miles from the meaningless concerns of high society. 128 00:06:06,221 --> 00:06:08,682 I embarked upon a quest for enlightenment. 129 00:06:09,558 --> 00:06:12,519 I learned to embrace a life of simplicity. 130 00:06:13,270 --> 00:06:14,271 I meditated. 131 00:06:15,939 --> 00:06:17,232 I worked. 132 00:06:17,900 --> 00:06:19,735 I gave back to Mother Earth 133 00:06:20,569 --> 00:06:21,904 and I slept. 134 00:06:23,155 --> 00:06:25,949 My soul had never felt so nourished. 135 00:06:26,658 --> 00:06:30,078 Until one day, my former life came knocking at the open space 136 00:06:30,287 --> 00:06:33,415 where a door would have been if we were given any privacy. 137 00:06:33,665 --> 00:06:34,666 MAN: Yo! 138 00:06:35,167 --> 00:06:36,418 Is that Tahani Al-Jamil? 139 00:06:36,627 --> 00:06:38,337 Man, it totes is you. 140 00:06:38,587 --> 00:06:40,672 What up, I'm Colby, Squalor News. 141 00:06:42,466 --> 00:06:44,134 What are you doing in this monastery? 142 00:06:44,218 --> 00:06:47,513 Oh, we're doing a new show about poverty, drug lords, gun running 143 00:06:47,679 --> 00:06:50,807 weird ass restaurants, skateboarding and... oh, and also genocide. 144 00:06:51,016 --> 00:06:52,351 It's called "Society Is Effed". 145 00:06:52,643 --> 00:06:53,810 What are you doing here, though? 146 00:06:53,894 --> 00:06:55,771 Is this where you came after your sister saved your life? 147 00:06:56,688 --> 00:07:01,276 I am living here as a way to shed my desire for attention. 148 00:07:01,568 --> 00:07:04,154 "Toight!" That's what's up. You gotta shed that, right? 149 00:07:04,404 --> 00:07:05,989 But listen If you ever want us to do like 150 00:07:06,073 --> 00:07:08,992 a monster profile on you and your monk junk 151 00:07:09,117 --> 00:07:10,661 would be honoured AF. 152 00:07:10,744 --> 00:07:14,790 I think people would be "supes" interested in what you're doing here. For real. 153 00:07:14,831 --> 00:07:17,084 Look, here's my card. Think about it. 154 00:07:17,751 --> 00:07:20,629 TAHANI (VO): Of course I never called him to do that profile 155 00:07:20,712 --> 00:07:24,550 because I didn't pursue a life of tranquillity to get in front of a camera. 156 00:07:25,175 --> 00:07:28,220 I did it to get out of the spotlight. 157 00:07:29,012 --> 00:07:30,889 And that's what my book is about. 158 00:07:31,306 --> 00:07:34,434 Shedding your need for validation from others. 159 00:07:35,519 --> 00:07:37,187 AUDIENCE APPLAUDS AND CHEERS 160 00:07:40,357 --> 00:07:43,652 ASSISTANT: Publisher says you'll hit two million copies sold by next week. 161 00:07:44,278 --> 00:07:48,073 Your "Five Hundred Eighty-Two Questions With" video was nominated for a BAFTA. 162 00:07:48,156 --> 00:07:50,284 - Oh, that's fun. - Also, they want you for Oprah. 163 00:07:50,784 --> 00:07:53,912 - Oprah's off the air. - No, they want you to take over for Oprah. 164 00:07:54,371 --> 00:07:55,914 Also this investor wants to meet you. 165 00:07:56,248 --> 00:07:57,624 I checked him out, he's legit. 166 00:07:58,667 --> 00:07:59,626 Tahani! 167 00:08:00,252 --> 00:08:01,336 Gordon Indigo. 168 00:08:01,587 --> 00:08:04,548 I just have to say, you are so inspiring. 169 00:08:04,715 --> 00:08:05,716 Aw... 170 00:08:06,508 --> 00:08:08,010 - Namaste. - I mean... 171 00:08:08,093 --> 00:08:10,095 you really have all these idiots fooled. 172 00:08:10,470 --> 00:08:11,346 - Excuse me? - Listen. 173 00:08:11,430 --> 00:08:15,100 I'm sure you're already rolling in dough from this incredible scam 174 00:08:15,309 --> 00:08:17,019 but have you thought about merch? 175 00:08:17,102 --> 00:08:18,770 Because we could, uh... we could partner here. 176 00:08:18,854 --> 00:08:22,941 I made a fortune selling Nirvana orbs which is to say... 177 00:08:24,318 --> 00:08:26,862 driving range golf balls that I painted silver. 178 00:08:27,529 --> 00:08:29,990 - That's awful! - No, it's healing! 179 00:08:30,824 --> 00:08:31,867 Wink! HE LAUGHS 180 00:08:31,950 --> 00:08:34,453 I mean, you should be selling candles 181 00:08:34,620 --> 00:08:37,247 prayer robes, meditation gum... 182 00:08:37,664 --> 00:08:39,082 whatever crap you can think of 183 00:08:39,166 --> 00:08:41,376 - cos these people will buy it. - That is quite enough. 184 00:08:41,501 --> 00:08:43,879 And how dare you insinuate that I'm not authentic. 185 00:08:44,046 --> 00:08:45,297 I've finished signing your headshots. 186 00:08:45,380 --> 00:08:47,549 - Oh! Not now! - Miss Al-Jamil 187 00:08:47,966 --> 00:08:49,009 it's OK. 188 00:08:49,343 --> 00:08:50,761 You and I are the same. 189 00:08:51,011 --> 00:08:52,721 I love what you're doing here. 190 00:08:53,013 --> 00:08:54,640 You get to be rich and famous. 191 00:08:54,848 --> 00:08:57,517 And not have to do any of the work of helping people. 192 00:08:57,893 --> 00:08:59,561 But I am helping people. 193 00:08:59,811 --> 00:09:02,230 - You need to go, right now. - Suit yourself. 194 00:09:02,814 --> 00:09:04,650 Look, if you change your mind, I'm online. 195 00:09:04,733 --> 00:09:08,362 Just google, "Crystals that prevent erectile dysfunction." 196 00:09:08,612 --> 00:09:09,571 SHE SCOFFS 197 00:09:09,863 --> 00:09:12,532 ASSISTANT: I'm sorry, but Miss Al-Jamil doesn't have time 198 00:09:12,658 --> 00:09:16,453 to participate in an "ethical study" at some random university. 199 00:09:16,995 --> 00:09:21,083 If you want to meet her, you can sign up for the "Get Out of the Spotlight" cruise 200 00:09:21,291 --> 00:09:24,086 with special guests Deepak Chopra and Will.I.Am... 201 00:09:26,171 --> 00:09:27,130 Hello? 202 00:09:28,256 --> 00:09:29,341 This is Tahani Al-Jamil. 203 00:09:29,466 --> 00:09:31,593 CHIDI ON PHONE: Oh, uh, hi. I didn't think I'd actually get you. 204 00:09:31,718 --> 00:09:33,637 My name is Chidi Anagonye 205 00:09:33,720 --> 00:09:38,058 and I'm doing an academic study on near-death experiences 206 00:09:38,141 --> 00:09:39,476 and ethical decision-making. 207 00:09:39,643 --> 00:09:42,145 - I read an article about you-- - Will it help people? 208 00:09:42,270 --> 00:09:44,564 That's all I want to know. Will this help people? 209 00:09:44,981 --> 00:09:47,109 Yes, I... I, I think so. I mean... 210 00:09:48,110 --> 00:09:49,945 - that's the goal. - Send me the info. 211 00:09:50,529 --> 00:09:51,905 I'll be there tomorrow morning. 212 00:09:54,241 --> 00:09:55,283 Wow. 213 00:09:56,159 --> 00:09:58,412 How had you learned about me, I wonder? 214 00:09:58,495 --> 00:10:02,082 A professor I'd never heard of named Charles Brainman 215 00:10:02,165 --> 00:10:05,585 sent me an article about you, said you'd be perfect for our study. 216 00:10:06,002 --> 00:10:07,504 Well, welcome to Australia! 217 00:10:07,796 --> 00:10:09,214 Oh, if you need a place to crash 218 00:10:09,297 --> 00:10:11,758 while you get settled, my motel has a pull-out sofa. 219 00:10:12,426 --> 00:10:15,804 Although, as I say that, and I look at you and your whole thing 220 00:10:15,887 --> 00:10:18,974 realise that's absurd, and you should probably just get your own place. 221 00:10:19,307 --> 00:10:22,644 Yes, I... I think that's, uh... best. 222 00:10:22,894 --> 00:10:24,312 - But... but thank you! - Mm-hm. 223 00:10:27,899 --> 00:10:28,984 Three down. 224 00:10:30,235 --> 00:10:31,278 One to go. 225 00:10:35,490 --> 00:10:36,491 'Sup, bud! 226 00:10:36,783 --> 00:10:37,909 I've been lookin' for you! 227 00:10:38,368 --> 00:10:40,704 - Oh, sorry, are these your rocks? - No. 228 00:10:41,079 --> 00:10:43,123 Look, my name is Zack Pizazz 229 00:10:43,582 --> 00:10:44,875 international talent scout. 230 00:10:45,459 --> 00:10:48,128 I've been tracking your dance troupe, man. 231 00:10:48,336 --> 00:10:49,796 I think you really got the goods! 232 00:10:50,088 --> 00:10:51,798 I want you to come on down to Australia 233 00:10:52,215 --> 00:10:54,634 and start a new crew. Alright, I'll pay for everything. 234 00:10:54,843 --> 00:10:56,470 May have a few other obligations, but basically... 235 00:10:56,636 --> 00:10:59,097 Uh, thanks, but no thanks, man. 236 00:10:59,389 --> 00:11:00,474 I'm done with dancing. 237 00:11:01,016 --> 00:11:04,394 But... wait, wait, whoa, whoa, whoa... you... you heard what my name was, right? 238 00:11:05,645 --> 00:11:08,607 - Zack Pizazz? - My life is just kinda messed up right now. 239 00:11:08,899 --> 00:11:10,233 I had a really tough year. 240 00:11:12,527 --> 00:11:13,403 I'm sorry. 241 00:11:14,070 --> 00:11:16,865 I'm sorry. Want to talk about it? I'm a pretty good listener. 242 00:11:17,616 --> 00:11:19,576 Well, my year... 243 00:11:20,202 --> 00:11:21,870 started about a year ago. 244 00:11:24,164 --> 00:11:27,375 Pillboi? I can't breathe and I'm freaking out and I'm almost out of whip-its! 245 00:11:27,751 --> 00:11:31,963 - Pillboi! - Buongiorno! Buongiorno! 246 00:11:33,131 --> 00:11:34,341 HE GASPS 247 00:11:35,342 --> 00:11:37,010 Yo! What happened? 248 00:11:37,219 --> 00:11:39,805 I couldn't breathe. The snorkel must have been broken! 249 00:11:40,347 --> 00:11:41,306 Yo, that sucks! 250 00:11:42,599 --> 00:11:44,726 - You ready to get back in there? - No, man! 251 00:11:46,144 --> 00:11:47,354 We're not doing this no more. 252 00:11:47,771 --> 00:11:49,815 I almost died trying to rob a Mexican restaurant. 253 00:11:52,067 --> 00:11:53,151 I have to change my life. 254 00:11:57,781 --> 00:11:59,032 I know what I'm gonna do. 255 00:12:03,453 --> 00:12:06,373 I'm gonna win this dance competition. 256 00:12:06,873 --> 00:12:09,709 So you didn't see any other posters there? 257 00:12:09,835 --> 00:12:10,877 No, don't think so, why? 258 00:12:11,586 --> 00:12:12,796 It doesn't matter, continue. 259 00:12:13,171 --> 00:12:16,049 Homies, I almost died yesterday. 260 00:12:16,591 --> 00:12:18,468 But we've been given a second chance. 261 00:12:19,052 --> 00:12:23,765 Three months from today, on this very stage, in the Carmen Electra Auditorium 262 00:12:24,474 --> 00:12:27,143 right here at the Smith & Wesson Performing Arts Centre 263 00:12:27,227 --> 00:12:28,603 and "A.T.V." Repair Shop 264 00:12:29,437 --> 00:12:31,189 we are going to win this... 265 00:12:31,815 --> 00:12:33,275 dance competition. 266 00:12:33,859 --> 00:12:35,193 How? You ask. 267 00:12:35,610 --> 00:12:40,907 By working. We are going to eat, breathe, and vape dance. 268 00:12:41,032 --> 00:12:43,827 I want you thinking about dance 24/7. 269 00:12:44,035 --> 00:12:46,621 That means every day you think 20 thoughts about dance 270 00:12:46,746 --> 00:12:48,665 for seven minutes. 271 00:12:48,832 --> 00:12:52,627 And if you can't promise me that you'll give this dance crew everything that you've got 272 00:12:52,878 --> 00:12:54,629 then you can walk out that door... 273 00:12:55,755 --> 00:12:56,923 right now. 274 00:12:58,174 --> 00:13:00,635 - Yep, OK. I'm out. - What? 275 00:13:01,136 --> 00:13:03,388 Come on, Donkey Doug! After all we've been through? 276 00:13:03,597 --> 00:13:07,559 Listen, you know you're my boy, but this sounds like a lotta work. Good luck. 277 00:13:10,020 --> 00:13:10,979 Pew pew! 278 00:13:12,731 --> 00:13:14,274 Donkey Doug out! 279 00:13:17,068 --> 00:13:18,695 Damn. That's a tough blow. 280 00:13:18,904 --> 00:13:21,489 But, now that those guys are no longer members of our crew 281 00:13:21,823 --> 00:13:23,742 we can legally rob their houses! 282 00:13:23,909 --> 00:13:26,453 No, Li'l Peanut! We're gonna do this the right way. 283 00:13:26,828 --> 00:13:29,998 No more crime! And if you don't like that, you can walk out that door... 284 00:13:31,249 --> 00:13:32,208 right now. 285 00:13:35,378 --> 00:13:37,714 Wh--? Gah... Come on... 286 00:13:39,174 --> 00:13:41,092 We still got like thirty-five people, so... 287 00:13:41,259 --> 00:13:42,385 let's get to work. 288 00:13:43,428 --> 00:13:45,555 - AUDIENCE APPLAUDS AND CHEERS - Quick announcement. 289 00:13:45,889 --> 00:13:48,892 Will the owner of a 1998 Toyota Tercel 290 00:13:48,975 --> 00:13:51,561 with golden pythons painted on both sides 291 00:13:51,645 --> 00:13:55,106 license plate "GOT MILF" please see an usher? 292 00:13:55,649 --> 00:13:57,150 Your car has exploded. 293 00:13:57,609 --> 00:13:58,985 Alright, y'all ready for the next act? 294 00:13:59,444 --> 00:14:03,782 Please give it up right now for "Dance Dance Resolution!" 295 00:14:04,491 --> 00:14:05,659 AUDIENCE APPLAUDS AND CHEERS 296 00:14:06,409 --> 00:14:11,748 TECHNO MUSIC PLAYS 297 00:14:23,843 --> 00:14:26,137 In the six-year history of this competition 298 00:14:26,221 --> 00:14:29,557 no crew has ever received a perfect score from our judges. 299 00:14:29,933 --> 00:14:31,101 That changed tonight. 300 00:14:31,351 --> 00:14:34,104 But before we get to that, "Dance Dance Resolution" 301 00:14:34,437 --> 00:14:35,480 has been disqualified. 302 00:14:35,814 --> 00:14:37,440 What? No! 303 00:14:37,816 --> 00:14:40,944 - Why? - Because you have 40 people on stage. 304 00:14:41,361 --> 00:14:42,654 The limit is eight. 305 00:14:42,904 --> 00:14:45,991 Also one of your members tried to carjack me on my way in here. 306 00:14:46,199 --> 00:14:47,826 No, that was Donkey Doug 307 00:14:47,909 --> 00:14:51,037 and he's not a part of our crew anymore. We win. We win. 308 00:14:51,121 --> 00:14:53,665 THEY CHANT: We win! We win! We win! 309 00:14:53,748 --> 00:14:56,751 No, again, you are disqualified. 310 00:14:57,585 --> 00:14:59,087 ANNOUNCER: And the winner is... 311 00:14:59,713 --> 00:15:01,172 "Panther Blood"! 312 00:15:01,881 --> 00:15:03,174 ANNOUNCER: And the winner is... 313 00:15:04,009 --> 00:15:05,343 "Suck Monsters". 314 00:15:06,511 --> 00:15:08,013 ANNOUNCER: And the winner is... 315 00:15:08,638 --> 00:15:12,142 Nobody. All teams are disqualified, due to violence. 316 00:15:13,435 --> 00:15:15,020 OK, well... 317 00:15:15,437 --> 00:15:17,355 We're out of rent money, so... 318 00:15:17,772 --> 00:15:19,941 remember that thing I said about "no more crime"? 319 00:15:21,234 --> 00:15:22,944 That's over now, go do crime. 320 00:15:24,112 --> 00:15:27,115 - Yeah, he just confessed to the robbery. - Dammit! 321 00:15:27,157 --> 00:15:28,074 POLICE RADIO: That was easy! 322 00:15:28,158 --> 00:15:29,617 Look, please let me go. 323 00:15:29,701 --> 00:15:32,412 I only did it to pay rent for my dance crew's rehearsal space. 324 00:15:32,579 --> 00:15:33,913 Oh, well then you're in luck. 325 00:15:34,247 --> 00:15:36,833 We only arrest people for robbery if they don't have a reason. 326 00:15:38,209 --> 00:15:40,045 PILLBOI: Sorry it took me so long to bail you out. 327 00:15:41,004 --> 00:15:42,213 Nah, it was my fault. 328 00:15:42,505 --> 00:15:45,508 I shouldn't have used my one phone call to prank the police department. 329 00:15:46,718 --> 00:15:48,928 Man, a year ago I almost died 330 00:15:49,220 --> 00:15:51,264 and I'm exactly the same as I was before. 331 00:15:52,098 --> 00:15:54,100 - A failure. - You're not a failure. 332 00:15:54,559 --> 00:15:55,727 You're a dreamer. 333 00:15:56,102 --> 00:15:58,688 Look, I like my job at the old folks home. 334 00:15:58,897 --> 00:16:00,523 Those old biddies are sweet 335 00:16:00,774 --> 00:16:03,526 and sometimes they give me what they think are candy 336 00:16:03,777 --> 00:16:05,695 but are really loose Vicodin. 337 00:16:06,404 --> 00:16:10,158 But when I'm with you, I feel like the sky's the limit. 338 00:16:10,533 --> 00:16:14,454 I feel like someday I'll be able to buy my own Vicodin. 339 00:16:15,330 --> 00:16:19,250 And it'll never turn out to actually be laxatives. 340 00:16:19,918 --> 00:16:22,879 Thanks, dawg. But if my life ended today 341 00:16:23,546 --> 00:16:24,631 what would my legacy be? 342 00:16:25,298 --> 00:16:28,718 Sure, I did a wheelie on a dirt bike through an entire Waffle House... 343 00:16:29,761 --> 00:16:33,014 and I was once interviewed on the news for finding a foot on the beach 344 00:16:33,973 --> 00:16:37,352 but, yo, other than that I have no truly great accomplishments. 345 00:16:37,852 --> 00:16:38,853 Bro... 346 00:16:39,687 --> 00:16:41,648 Bro, I'm only saying this because I love you. 347 00:16:43,733 --> 00:16:45,151 Do you want a Vicodin right now? 348 00:16:46,319 --> 00:16:48,071 So I walked out of that bar 349 00:16:48,655 --> 00:16:49,948 came down to this wharf 350 00:16:50,281 --> 00:16:51,616 threw a rock at a snake 351 00:16:51,825 --> 00:16:53,910 met a guy named Zack Pizazz 352 00:16:54,202 --> 00:16:56,037 talked to him about my crazy year that I've had 353 00:16:56,121 --> 00:16:58,331 which started when I was locked in a safe... 354 00:16:58,414 --> 00:16:59,582 No, that was me. 355 00:16:59,874 --> 00:17:01,084 I'm Zack Pizazz. 356 00:17:01,626 --> 00:17:03,461 - We're caught up now. - Oh, yeah. 357 00:17:03,670 --> 00:17:05,922 - HE CHUCKLES - A year ago, if you had asked me 358 00:17:06,005 --> 00:17:07,715 to run a dance crew in Atlantis-- 359 00:17:07,799 --> 00:17:10,343 - Australia. - I would have said "yes", for sure. 360 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:14,973 But now, and I know this sounds crazy... 361 00:17:16,474 --> 00:17:18,726 but I'm starting to think there might be more to life 362 00:17:18,810 --> 00:17:21,437 than amateur street dancing competitions. 363 00:17:22,981 --> 00:17:25,233 It's funny, but I know exactly what you mean. 364 00:17:26,693 --> 00:17:29,863 My goal in life used to be completely different too. 365 00:17:31,156 --> 00:17:35,535 I used to rep this crew called... "The Demons." 366 00:17:35,869 --> 00:17:37,871 - Wow. - I remember you guys! 367 00:17:38,288 --> 00:17:41,332 Didn't you all die when someone brought a hammerhead shark into your hot tub? 368 00:17:42,041 --> 00:17:43,084 Different demons. 369 00:17:43,793 --> 00:17:47,088 The point is, I had to leave my old crew behind 370 00:17:47,172 --> 00:17:50,133 you know, but I met new friends, who helped me become... 371 00:17:51,176 --> 00:17:53,178 a better person. 372 00:17:54,095 --> 00:17:57,599 Look, I know this group of people who are also searching for meaning. 373 00:17:57,932 --> 00:18:00,226 They might be able to help you find what you're looking for. 374 00:18:00,643 --> 00:18:01,978 What do you think? You wanna meet them? 375 00:18:03,479 --> 00:18:05,356 Yeah, that sounds great. 376 00:18:07,192 --> 00:18:08,484 Do we have to leave right now? 377 00:18:08,902 --> 00:18:11,362 My friend gave me a pill that I realised one second ago 378 00:18:11,446 --> 00:18:12,864 was definitely a laxative... 379 00:18:13,198 --> 00:18:14,532 No, go, go! 380 00:18:16,451 --> 00:18:20,038 Well, that is the last time I'll need to head back down there. 381 00:18:20,205 --> 00:18:21,623 So, to thank you for your help 382 00:18:21,873 --> 00:18:23,791 I brought you back something from Earth. 383 00:18:24,209 --> 00:18:25,960 A little token of my appreciation. 384 00:18:26,252 --> 00:18:30,548 It keeps your anti-matter warmer, for longer! 385 00:18:35,345 --> 00:18:36,721 - It's a frog! - Yeah. 386 00:18:37,388 --> 00:18:38,514 - There's a frog on it. - Yeah. 387 00:18:39,515 --> 00:18:40,725 Right there, it's a frog! 388 00:18:41,184 --> 00:18:43,478 Oh, man, it's great. It's classic. 389 00:18:43,686 --> 00:18:45,230 Oh, this guy's a jumper, you can tell. 390 00:18:45,772 --> 00:18:47,273 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 391 00:18:49,651 --> 00:18:52,779 Wow, that... really went over big. 392 00:18:56,532 --> 00:18:57,909 How's Jason? Is he still cute? 393 00:18:58,159 --> 00:19:00,036 - Uh... he looks about the same. - That's sounds cute. 394 00:19:01,037 --> 00:19:02,163 - Hi, guys. - Oh... 395 00:19:02,247 --> 00:19:04,082 JANET: Hey. - Long time no see. 396 00:19:04,332 --> 00:19:05,500 - Yeah. - How's it going? 397 00:19:05,667 --> 00:19:08,044 So good. I mean, everything is going according to plan 398 00:19:08,127 --> 00:19:10,797 and nothing is going differently from the plan. 399 00:19:10,922 --> 00:19:13,383 Yes, that's a very not weird way to put it. 400 00:19:13,633 --> 00:19:15,843 - I'm just stretching my legs. - JANET: Oh. 401 00:19:16,135 --> 00:19:19,472 Just binged like 300 episodes of NCIS 402 00:19:19,597 --> 00:19:22,016 MICHAEL: Ooh! - You know, I'm not a human woman 403 00:19:22,183 --> 00:19:25,019 that Mark Harmon can "get it". 404 00:19:25,353 --> 00:19:27,188 - You know what I'm sayin'? - THEY GIGGLE NERVOUSLY 405 00:19:27,272 --> 00:19:29,649 Speaking of human cutie pies, how's that Chidi doing? 406 00:19:29,774 --> 00:19:31,150 Oh, sorry, Judge. Let me just... 407 00:19:31,234 --> 00:19:33,069 Oh, hey! You know what you would love 408 00:19:33,152 --> 00:19:34,445 - if you like Mark Harmon? - Uh-huh? 409 00:19:34,529 --> 00:19:37,699 "Stealing Home". He is very sexy in "Stealing Home" 410 00:19:37,782 --> 00:19:40,535 according to the private thoughts of more than seven million Caucasian women. 411 00:19:40,743 --> 00:19:43,454 Oh, hot tip! Thanks y'all. 412 00:19:43,496 --> 00:19:45,039 - You guys wanna come with? - Ooh... 413 00:19:45,123 --> 00:19:47,667 We can watch together, I can whip up some nachos... 414 00:19:47,917 --> 00:19:49,961 I am incapable of eating, so... 415 00:19:50,044 --> 00:19:52,171 - Suit yourselves, party poopers. - THEY CHUCKLE 416 00:19:52,255 --> 00:19:53,548 - Huh, party poopers! - THEY CHUCKLE 417 00:19:53,631 --> 00:19:55,216 I guess it'll be just me and Mark, then. 418 00:19:55,300 --> 00:19:58,845 - THEY LAUGH - Naughty, naughty! 419 00:19:59,095 --> 00:20:02,598 Oh, boy. Michael, we almost just got busted. 420 00:20:02,765 --> 00:20:04,684 Yeah, but we didn't and more importantly... 421 00:20:05,435 --> 00:20:07,312 Jason just arrived in Australia. 422 00:20:07,478 --> 00:20:11,107 The four of them are finally together. Oh, we did it, Janet. 423 00:20:11,441 --> 00:20:12,442 We got away with it. 424 00:20:15,069 --> 00:20:17,447 So, this is our MRI machine. 425 00:20:17,530 --> 00:20:18,740 Oh, don't... don't touch that. 426 00:20:18,990 --> 00:20:21,117 Each of you will get a chance in here eventually. 427 00:20:21,326 --> 00:20:23,161 Hopefully, none of you's claustrophobic? 428 00:20:23,369 --> 00:20:26,748 Claws-naphobic? Who would ever be scared of Santa Claus? 429 00:20:26,831 --> 00:20:29,542 Oh, the Jewish. 430 00:20:29,917 --> 00:20:30,918 You from Florida? 431 00:20:31,419 --> 00:20:32,670 - Jacksonville. - Yeah! 432 00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:35,131 That should be fine for me. It's roughly the same size 433 00:20:35,214 --> 00:20:37,717 as Nicole Kidman's cryogenic anti-aging chamber 434 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:39,552 and I've never had a problem in there, so... 435 00:20:40,094 --> 00:20:41,054 I'll be OK, too. 436 00:20:41,387 --> 00:20:44,265 It kinda reminds me of the home tanning booth I lost my virginity in. 437 00:20:44,515 --> 00:20:47,268 Wow. I cannot wait to take a look at these three brains. 438 00:20:47,810 --> 00:20:51,439 Oh, forgot to mention. There's one more person who will be joining us. 439 00:20:51,856 --> 00:20:53,733 Seems like a really interesting guy. 440 00:20:53,816 --> 00:20:55,777 He was almost run over by a train a few months ago 441 00:20:55,860 --> 00:20:57,236 heard about the study, emailed me last night. 442 00:20:58,404 --> 00:21:00,198 This doesn't make any sense. 443 00:21:02,784 --> 00:21:03,868 They're all there. 444 00:21:04,202 --> 00:21:05,578 What's going on? 445 00:21:06,704 --> 00:21:07,705 Oh, no. 446 00:21:08,664 --> 00:21:11,876 - What is it? - Something bad, Janet, something 447 00:21:12,960 --> 00:21:13,961 very dark... 448 00:21:15,254 --> 00:21:16,214 and evil. 449 00:21:17,340 --> 00:21:18,508 Oh, yes. Come on in. 450 00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:19,675 Everyone... 451 00:21:20,134 --> 00:21:22,428 - this is Trevor. - Hey, guys. 452 00:21:22,595 --> 00:21:24,972 It is so great to meet you. 453 00:21:25,056 --> 00:21:26,599 DRAMATIC CHORDS PLAY