1
00:00:09,030 --> 00:00:11,615
Oh, Janet, you disappoint me.
2
00:00:12,199 --> 00:00:13,868
I expected more of a fight from you.
3
00:00:13,951 --> 00:00:17,204
Yet here you are,
all alone in the Bad Place,
4
00:00:17,288 --> 00:00:20,958
rendered powerless
by a measly magnet jail.
5
00:00:25,463 --> 00:00:26,505
It's okay, I guess.
6
00:00:26,589 --> 00:00:28,090
What is the issue now, hmm?
7
00:00:28,174 --> 00:00:29,967
That's not how Michael laughs.
8
00:00:30,050 --> 00:00:32,178
It's more of a delighted giggle.
9
00:00:32,261 --> 00:00:33,137
She's right.
10
00:00:33,971 --> 00:00:35,890
You need to nail his subtleties
and mannerisms
11
00:00:35,973 --> 00:00:37,516
for this to properly work as torture.
12
00:00:39,268 --> 00:00:40,478
My problem with the role
13
00:00:40,561 --> 00:00:43,355
is that I haven't fully figured out
Michael's motivation yet.
14
00:00:43,439 --> 00:00:47,943
Like, I'm inside Michael,
but I need to be "inside" Michael.
15
00:00:48,027 --> 00:00:50,154
Hmm. You know, it actually
feels more like torture
16
00:00:50,237 --> 00:00:52,448
when you discuss your "acting process."
17
00:00:52,531 --> 00:00:53,491
You don't get it.
18
00:00:53,574 --> 00:00:55,451
If you really wanna know
Michael's motivation,
19
00:00:55,534 --> 00:00:57,411
it's the same as the rest of my friends:
20
00:00:57,495 --> 00:00:59,455
Loyalty, empathy and love.
21
00:00:59,538 --> 00:01:01,707
-Ew.
-And that's why they will prevail.
22
00:01:01,791 --> 00:01:04,710
I hate to break it to you, hon.
They're not gonna prevail.
23
00:01:06,128 --> 00:01:08,506
No one's coming to save you.
24
00:01:11,092 --> 00:01:12,718
-Oof. Getting colder.
-I know!
25
00:01:12,802 --> 00:01:14,553
I could feel it. You know, it was wrong.
26
00:01:14,637 --> 00:01:16,180
I'm just... I'm in my head now.
27
00:01:18,516 --> 00:01:21,477
Hey, Mikey, I have
a question about our plan to save Janet.
28
00:01:22,228 --> 00:01:23,437
Is there it yet?
29
00:01:23,521 --> 00:01:24,897
I do have a plan, yes.
30
00:01:24,980 --> 00:01:27,691
But to be honest,
I have no idea if it will work.
31
00:01:27,775 --> 00:01:28,984
Maybe Glenn can help.
32
00:01:29,777 --> 00:01:32,446
Yo, Glenn!
How should we rescue Janet?
33
00:01:34,824 --> 00:01:35,783
He doesn't know.
34
00:01:35,866 --> 00:01:37,618
Listen, Jason, old friend.
35
00:01:37,701 --> 00:01:42,331
I already gave Eleanor and Tahani
all their afterlife memories back.
36
00:01:42,414 --> 00:01:45,876
I haven't restored yours...
for obvious reasons.
37
00:01:45,960 --> 00:01:49,338
But I think to maximize
our chances of survival,
38
00:01:49,421 --> 00:01:52,550
it's time that you remember
everything we've been through.
39
00:01:52,633 --> 00:01:55,302
Prepare yourself, this might be intense.
40
00:01:56,762 --> 00:02:01,725
Oh... dip!
41
00:02:03,352 --> 00:02:05,396
-Do you remember everything?
-Yes.
42
00:02:05,479 --> 00:02:08,732
Last time I was in the Bad Place,
I threw a Molotov cocktail.
43
00:02:08,816 --> 00:02:10,067
That was sick.
44
00:02:10,151 --> 00:02:12,903
I was afraid that you'd watch
300 years of memories
45
00:02:12,987 --> 00:02:14,029
and that would be your takeaway.
46
00:02:14,113 --> 00:02:17,741
Buddy, I did that
to help you know what not to do.
47
00:02:17,825 --> 00:02:19,785
Impulse control is critical.
48
00:02:19,869 --> 00:02:24,290
Fight the urge to blow stuff up,
even if you feel like we're in a jam.
49
00:02:24,999 --> 00:02:25,833
Got it?
50
00:02:26,417 --> 00:02:30,713
I mean, that's very lame,
but, yeah, I understand.
51
00:02:31,922 --> 00:02:34,008
Wait, can I have
all my memories back again?
52
00:02:34,091 --> 00:02:35,467
I forgot most of them.
53
00:02:45,227 --> 00:02:46,353
Welcome, everyone!
54
00:02:46,937 --> 00:02:48,772
Janet will be unavailable for a bit.
55
00:02:48,856 --> 00:02:52,276
She's undergoing some
routine system maintenance.
56
00:02:52,359 --> 00:02:53,861
Oh, I know what that means.
57
00:02:53,944 --> 00:02:55,529
Eye lift, maybe an ear tuck.
58
00:02:55,613 --> 00:02:57,531
Mmm. Mmm! Mmm.
59
00:02:57,615 --> 00:02:59,325
When we don't have Janet,
60
00:02:59,408 --> 00:03:02,953
we like to refresh your memories
of your old lives,
61
00:03:03,037 --> 00:03:04,705
when you did things for yourselves.
62
00:03:04,788 --> 00:03:06,874
We call it Earth Day!
63
00:03:06,957 --> 00:03:08,918
And, yes, we know that's a thing on Earth,
64
00:03:09,001 --> 00:03:10,669
but what are they
gonna do, sue us?
65
00:03:11,670 --> 00:03:15,382
So, get ready for
some fun, lo-fi activities.
66
00:03:15,466 --> 00:03:18,469
-This group over here is gonna knit.
67
00:03:18,552 --> 00:03:21,430
You folks are gonna do
your favorite activity, gardening.
68
00:03:22,514 --> 00:03:23,974
Oh, man, we better get
something better than that.
69
00:03:24,058 --> 00:03:28,228
And you five are going
to a gorgeous, remote lake house.
70
00:03:28,312 --> 00:03:30,522
Swimming, waterskiing, the works.
71
00:03:32,232 --> 00:03:33,859
Suck it, gardeners.
72
00:03:33,943 --> 00:03:35,444
Why do I feel like
that's not the first time
73
00:03:35,527 --> 00:03:36,737
he's screamed those words?
74
00:03:39,782 --> 00:03:43,494
Ugh. Get me down from here,
you tiny butthole.
75
00:03:43,577 --> 00:03:44,411
Ow!
76
00:03:45,663 --> 00:03:48,707
Thank you for keeping me safe
from my sexy, bad-girl sister-aunt.
77
00:03:48,791 --> 00:03:49,750
Ew.
78
00:03:49,833 --> 00:03:54,088
I know that I've caused you a lot
of trouble in the past... Classic Derek.
79
00:03:54,171 --> 00:03:56,507
But from now on, I'm here to help.
80
00:03:56,590 --> 00:03:57,758
I'd feel a lot more confident
81
00:03:57,841 --> 00:04:00,636
if you weren't holding a champagne glass
full of Scrabble letters,
82
00:04:00,719 --> 00:04:01,929
but you're all we got.
83
00:04:02,012 --> 00:04:04,515
You can keep
the neighborhood running, right?
84
00:04:04,598 --> 00:04:07,434
Well, I wasn't technically
designed for this,
85
00:04:07,518 --> 00:04:11,438
but to be fair,
I wasn't designed for anything.
86
00:04:11,522 --> 00:04:14,608
Okay, we're gonna get the humans
far away from the center of town
87
00:04:14,692 --> 00:04:16,110
to help lighten your load.
88
00:04:16,193 --> 00:04:17,027
That would be really great.
89
00:04:17,111 --> 00:04:18,237
-Okay.
-Okay.
90
00:04:18,737 --> 00:04:19,947
All right, babe, it's go time. You ready?
91
00:04:20,531 --> 00:04:23,367
Absolutely.
I feel very confident with you in charge.
92
00:04:23,450 --> 00:04:26,203
In the words of my godfather,
acting in what can only be described
93
00:04:26,287 --> 00:04:28,497
in hindsight
as his most problematic role...
94
00:04:28,998 --> 00:04:30,499
"You the man now, dawg."
95
00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,294
As always, thank you for finding
the quickest possible way to say things.
96
00:04:33,377 --> 00:04:37,548
Now, head off to the lake house,
and do your fabulous Tahani hostess thing!
97
00:04:37,631 --> 00:04:39,341
Actually, uh, now that you bring it up,
98
00:04:39,425 --> 00:04:43,846
Michael and Jason are rescuing Janet
and you're running things here.
99
00:04:43,929 --> 00:04:45,556
Even Derek has an important job.
100
00:04:47,516 --> 00:04:48,350
Ah.
101
00:04:48,434 --> 00:04:49,727
I'd like to be more useful.
102
00:04:49,810 --> 00:04:52,021
What is it that you Americans say? Uh...
103
00:04:52,104 --> 00:04:53,814
"Insert me, coach man!"
104
00:04:54,398 --> 00:04:55,691
"Put me in, coach."
105
00:04:55,774 --> 00:04:59,486
Babe, we need these humans
to stay happy and occupied.
106
00:04:59,570 --> 00:05:01,405
All right? So just
pump 'em full of champagne,
107
00:05:01,488 --> 00:05:03,824
and those tiny little sandwiches
and keep 'em dazzled.
108
00:05:03,907 --> 00:05:05,117
Of course.
109
00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:07,619
Though I'd never serve
finger sandwiches at a lake house.
110
00:05:07,703 --> 00:05:09,621
I mean, what am I, Welsh?
111
00:05:09,705 --> 00:05:12,374
Are you? I don't know.
No, right?
112
00:05:15,544 --> 00:05:17,504
Okay. We have to move quietly.
113
00:05:17,588 --> 00:05:20,132
We can't be seen by anyone
until we get to Shawn.
114
00:05:20,215 --> 00:05:22,092
It's the only way to rescue Janet.
115
00:05:22,176 --> 00:05:23,510
Uh, Michael?
116
00:05:24,553 --> 00:05:25,429
I'm scared.
117
00:05:26,013 --> 00:05:26,847
Me, too, bud.
118
00:05:26,930 --> 00:05:30,893
I mean, what if all this time apart
has changed me and Janet's relationship?
119
00:05:30,976 --> 00:05:32,936
What if that special connection is gone?
120
00:05:33,979 --> 00:05:34,813
Yeah.
121
00:05:35,564 --> 00:05:39,818
I mean, for me, it's scary that
we're standing in the birthplace of evil,
122
00:05:39,902 --> 00:05:43,113
surrounded by billions of demons
who wanna destroy us.
123
00:05:43,197 --> 00:05:44,073
Hmm.
124
00:05:44,156 --> 00:05:46,492
I guess we both have things
we're scared about.
125
00:05:48,494 --> 00:05:50,245
Hello, all.
126
00:05:50,329 --> 00:05:52,081
I took the liberty of preparing
a few simple snacks.
127
00:05:52,164 --> 00:05:54,666
Ooh! This place is nice.
128
00:05:55,167 --> 00:05:59,004
Did anyone else see that movie
The Lake House with Keanu and Sandy B?
129
00:05:59,088 --> 00:06:01,090
Ugh, I love a movie with gentle magic.
130
00:06:01,173 --> 00:06:04,510
Gimme a time-traveling mailbox,
or a mother-daughter body switch,
131
00:06:04,593 --> 00:06:06,762
or, like, Sarah Michelle Gellar as a chef
132
00:06:06,845 --> 00:06:09,890
and her food tastes amazing
because she cries in it.
133
00:06:10,474 --> 00:06:11,725
I should have been a screenwriter.
134
00:06:11,809 --> 00:06:13,435
Yeah. This'll do, I guess.
135
00:06:14,019 --> 00:06:15,187
I got dibs on the master bedroom.
136
00:06:15,270 --> 00:06:18,690
-Um, Simone? Where's Chidi?
-He decided to just stay at home and read.
137
00:06:18,774 --> 00:06:20,442
He said swimming in lakes scares him.
138
00:06:20,526 --> 00:06:22,528
To be fair, most things scare him.
139
00:06:23,904 --> 00:06:25,864
Well, never fear.
140
00:06:25,948 --> 00:06:28,492
You all stay and enjoy
the full-sized sandwiches.
141
00:06:28,575 --> 00:06:31,120
I shall go and fetch Chidi.
142
00:06:31,203 --> 00:06:33,288
Tahani is on the job.
143
00:06:34,206 --> 00:06:37,709
Perv 'stache, four eyes...
144
00:06:37,793 --> 00:06:39,378
bee monster.
145
00:06:39,461 --> 00:06:40,546
Whoa!
146
00:06:40,629 --> 00:06:41,672
Is that you?
147
00:06:42,506 --> 00:06:44,133
Technically, yes.
148
00:06:44,216 --> 00:06:46,760
But it's a version of me
I no longer recognize.
149
00:06:46,844 --> 00:06:50,639
Behind that handsome smile
was so much cruelty,
150
00:06:50,722 --> 00:06:55,602
so much pain inflicted on so many,
with such glee.
151
00:06:56,186 --> 00:06:57,062
Shameful.
152
00:06:58,564 --> 00:07:02,192
What echoes of this former self
await me here?
153
00:07:02,276 --> 00:07:03,485
I feel you.
154
00:07:03,569 --> 00:07:06,363
It was always hard for me to go back
to my old high school.
155
00:07:06,446 --> 00:07:07,781
So many memories.
156
00:07:08,490 --> 00:07:11,326
Also, the junkyard machine
crushed it into tiny cubes.
157
00:07:11,910 --> 00:07:16,415
If we get out of here alive,
remind me to re-erase your teen years.
158
00:07:20,461 --> 00:07:23,046
Come on, guys. Hurry back.
159
00:07:24,214 --> 00:07:26,133
Oh. Hey, Wanda. Everything okay?
160
00:07:26,216 --> 00:07:28,385
Barg-de-barg-de-barg-de-barg.
161
00:07:28,469 --> 00:07:29,761
Come again?
162
00:07:30,471 --> 00:07:32,723
-Oh.
-Barg-de-barg-de-barg-de-barg.
163
00:07:33,515 --> 00:07:35,100
-Derek?
-Oh! Hey!
164
00:07:35,184 --> 00:07:39,730
So, uh... things are... not going well.
165
00:07:39,813 --> 00:07:41,273
-Hi there!
-Hi!
166
00:07:41,857 --> 00:07:42,941
You said you could handle this.
167
00:07:43,025 --> 00:07:46,361
Yeah, well, it turns out
being a single father to 300 kids
168
00:07:46,445 --> 00:07:48,322
is not that easy, Eleanor.
169
00:07:48,405 --> 00:07:51,241
Okay, well, the four humans
are still at the lake house,
170
00:07:51,325 --> 00:07:52,993
so we can figure this out.
171
00:07:53,660 --> 00:07:55,704
-What are you doing here?
-I came to get Chidi.
172
00:07:55,787 --> 00:07:56,705
He decided to stay home.
173
00:07:57,289 --> 00:07:59,166
Chidi's up there? Right now?
174
00:08:00,417 --> 00:08:02,753
Oh, Chidi, there you are.
175
00:08:02,836 --> 00:08:06,798
Hi. Sorry, I should've told you.
I decided to just stay home and read.
176
00:08:06,882 --> 00:08:09,801
Swimming in lakes scares me,
and so does waterskiing--
177
00:08:09,885 --> 00:08:10,928
We know all that, Chidi.
178
00:08:11,011 --> 00:08:13,847
We never expected you
to meet the group at the lake house.
179
00:08:13,931 --> 00:08:17,518
We had a special solo activity
planned for you.
180
00:08:17,601 --> 00:08:19,603
-Really? What is it?
-Mmm-hmm.
181
00:08:20,729 --> 00:08:25,901
We have hidden several clues
in this apartment to a puzzle.
182
00:08:25,984 --> 00:08:27,236
Ooh!
183
00:08:27,319 --> 00:08:28,862
-I love puzzles.
184
00:08:28,946 --> 00:08:31,406
They're so much fun,
but they're also like homework. Win-win.
185
00:08:31,490 --> 00:08:33,659
Well, this one's a doozy
because when you solve it,
186
00:08:33,742 --> 00:08:36,078
you get the answer
to the truth about the universe.
187
00:08:37,663 --> 00:08:39,540
Spoiler alert... I guess.
188
00:08:39,623 --> 00:08:42,000
Hey, Tahani, you've been so helpful,
189
00:08:42,084 --> 00:08:44,878
but everyone's back at the lake house
with no party hostess,
190
00:08:44,962 --> 00:08:46,797
which is obviously less than ideal.
191
00:08:46,880 --> 00:08:48,298
So, go on, get.
192
00:08:48,382 --> 00:08:50,092
- Of course.
-Yeah.
193
00:08:50,175 --> 00:08:51,468
-Good luck, Chidi.
-Okay.
194
00:08:52,803 --> 00:08:53,887
So, what's my first clue?
195
00:08:55,264 --> 00:08:56,306
You've already gotten it.
196
00:08:56,390 --> 00:08:59,434
Ooh!
197
00:09:02,813 --> 00:09:03,897
All right, idiots.
198
00:09:03,981 --> 00:09:09,236
This is hour 52 of the 4,000-hour
presentation on the future of torture.
199
00:09:09,319 --> 00:09:12,614
-He's gonna be on stage for 4,000 hours?
200
00:09:12,698 --> 00:09:14,366
Here's what I think.
We should throw a Molotov--
201
00:09:14,449 --> 00:09:16,535
-Jason.
-What? I didn't say cocktail.
202
00:09:16,618 --> 00:09:18,537
I could've meant Molotov anything.
You don't know.
203
00:09:18,620 --> 00:09:20,205
Just trust me. I have a plan.
204
00:09:20,289 --> 00:09:22,332
Humans are worse than ever.
We have to innovate.
205
00:09:22,416 --> 00:09:24,376
Sure, poking sticks work great,
206
00:09:24,459 --> 00:09:27,045
but should those sticks
be sharper or hotter?
207
00:09:27,129 --> 00:09:29,965
Should they counter-intuitively
be less hot?
208
00:09:30,048 --> 00:09:32,718
Let's begin with
slide number one of 7,000.
209
00:09:35,178 --> 00:09:37,097
Nice speech... not!
210
00:09:37,681 --> 00:09:39,349
What's up, dingus?
211
00:09:41,226 --> 00:09:44,187
Oh, no. Oh, that's not good.
212
00:09:44,271 --> 00:09:48,025
Oh, what are you guys... Oh, no.
Don't do that. That's not Derek.
213
00:09:48,108 --> 00:09:49,359
-Derek.
214
00:09:49,443 --> 00:09:50,986
I'm going back to the lake house
to entertain,
215
00:09:51,069 --> 00:09:52,571
because, apparently,
that's all I'm good for.
216
00:09:52,654 --> 00:09:54,573
-Okay.
-I'm gonna need some party supplies.
217
00:09:54,656 --> 00:09:57,576
Cocktail napkins with
a cute, lake-related slogan.
218
00:09:57,659 --> 00:09:59,953
Maybe they could say
"better lake than never."
219
00:10:00,037 --> 00:10:03,206
Oh, sorry, I've just got
nothing left in the tank.
220
00:10:04,291 --> 00:10:07,294
Derek, when you get rebooted,
you become more advanced right?
221
00:10:07,377 --> 00:10:08,337
Yeah.
222
00:10:08,420 --> 00:10:10,589
Well, perhaps then you'd be more capable
of controlling the neighborhood.
223
00:10:10,672 --> 00:10:11,506
Hey, yeah, yeah.
224
00:10:11,590 --> 00:10:14,343
You said you wanted to make this up to us.
Well, now is your chance.
225
00:10:14,426 --> 00:10:15,510
-Yes.
-Yes.
226
00:10:15,594 --> 00:10:16,428
Derek.
227
00:10:17,638 --> 00:10:19,348
What are you doing here, Vicky?
You're early.
228
00:10:19,431 --> 00:10:21,558
And do you ever take that suit off?
It smells terrible.
229
00:10:21,642 --> 00:10:22,684
It does?
230
00:10:22,768 --> 00:10:23,602
No need to be alarmed.
231
00:10:23,685 --> 00:10:26,563
I know this might look like Michael,
the traitorous slam-pig.
232
00:10:26,647 --> 00:10:28,940
However, this is actually
our very own Vicky,
233
00:10:29,024 --> 00:10:30,942
wearing the latest in demon technology:
234
00:10:31,026 --> 00:10:33,362
A custom-made, look-alike skinsuit!
235
00:10:33,445 --> 00:10:35,197
-Spin around for us, would ya, hon?
236
00:10:36,198 --> 00:10:39,493
As you are all aware, our current system
suffers from diminishing returns.
237
00:10:39,576 --> 00:10:42,871
Sure, the first time someone gets
butthole spiders, he's miserable.
238
00:10:42,954 --> 00:10:46,541
But soon, the humans get used to it,
and worse, the spiders get bored.
239
00:10:46,625 --> 00:10:50,504
These personalized skinsuits represent
the dawn of a new era:
240
00:10:50,587 --> 00:10:52,506
Torture 2.0.
241
00:10:52,589 --> 00:10:54,591
- Oh!
242
00:10:54,675 --> 00:11:00,972
And speaking of which, I figured Demon Con
would be the best place to surprise you
243
00:11:01,056 --> 00:11:03,100
with my greatest invention.
244
00:11:03,183 --> 00:11:05,310
Come on out... Jason.
245
00:11:09,022 --> 00:11:11,358
I had the boys down in R&D
make a Jason suit.
246
00:11:11,441 --> 00:11:13,568
Thought it'd be a fun, new way
to torture Janet.
247
00:11:13,652 --> 00:11:15,862
-Come on. Come on. Here you go.
-I didn't okay this.
248
00:11:15,946 --> 00:11:18,240
I know, but, hey, I'm Vicky!
249
00:11:18,323 --> 00:11:19,366
I'm a total munch.
250
00:11:19,449 --> 00:11:21,076
That you are. Good point.
251
00:11:21,660 --> 00:11:23,328
Hmm. Not bad.
252
00:11:24,079 --> 00:11:26,123
They went a little overboard
on the cheekbones, but still.
253
00:11:26,957 --> 00:11:28,125
Wait, who's in there?
254
00:11:28,959 --> 00:11:30,585
-Glenn.
-Makes sense.
255
00:11:30,669 --> 00:11:31,878
Get an idiot to play an idiot.
256
00:11:31,962 --> 00:11:33,922
I was beginning to wonder
where you were, Glenn.
257
00:11:34,005 --> 00:11:36,091
I'm right here... in Jason.
258
00:11:36,842 --> 00:11:38,927
-Definitely not a big bucket of goo.
- Okay.
259
00:11:39,010 --> 00:11:42,889
Say, boss, what do you say we put
these innovative suits of yours to work?
260
00:11:42,973 --> 00:11:46,601
We'll go torture Good Janet
and let you know how it goes.
261
00:11:46,685 --> 00:11:48,019
-Which way is it again?
-Wait.
262
00:11:48,103 --> 00:11:49,479
I have a better idea.
263
00:11:50,063 --> 00:11:54,109
I say we torture Good Janet,
right here, right now, live on stage.
264
00:11:54,192 --> 00:11:56,361
-Rufus, go get the Good Janet.
265
00:11:57,404 --> 00:11:58,905
This part
of your plan seems risky.
266
00:11:58,989 --> 00:12:00,449
This was not part of my plan.
267
00:12:00,532 --> 00:12:03,160
Oh. Thank God,
I thought you had a bad plan!
268
00:12:05,245 --> 00:12:09,791
Okay, it's easy. Just hit the button.
You've seen Mindy do it a million times.
269
00:12:10,292 --> 00:12:11,501
Yeah, here we go.
270
00:12:11,585 --> 00:12:15,088
No, no, no, don't kill me, me.
271
00:12:15,172 --> 00:12:16,381
Don't do it.
272
00:12:16,465 --> 00:12:17,841
Huh.
273
00:12:17,924 --> 00:12:20,427
Now, why is that so hard? I kinda...
274
00:12:20,510 --> 00:12:22,387
You know what? I see what I gotta do.
275
00:12:22,471 --> 00:12:24,097
Just kinda look at this...
276
00:12:24,181 --> 00:12:26,224
Derek!
277
00:12:31,521 --> 00:12:32,647
Excellent.
278
00:12:34,691 --> 00:12:38,069
- Dude, what were you thinking?
- I just wanted to be useful.
279
00:12:38,153 --> 00:12:40,238
All I ever get to do here
is throw parties,
280
00:12:40,322 --> 00:12:42,032
which is all I ever got to do
back on Earth
281
00:12:42,115 --> 00:12:43,492
and now I've ruined everything.
282
00:12:43,575 --> 00:12:46,119
No, you gave us a way out.
283
00:12:46,203 --> 00:12:47,245
So, I fixed everything.
284
00:12:47,329 --> 00:12:50,665
No, you've made things difficult
in a new way, but I can make it work.
285
00:12:50,749 --> 00:12:52,542
But the important thing is
I did something.
286
00:12:52,626 --> 00:12:54,586
-Be quiet and follow my lead.
-Yes, ma'am.
287
00:12:54,669 --> 00:12:56,379
Chidi? Come on out, bud.
288
00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:58,423
Okay. Am I close?
289
00:12:58,507 --> 00:13:01,801
No, there's 4,000 clues in here.
You found five.
290
00:13:01,885 --> 00:13:02,719
I'm just gonna skip to the end.
291
00:13:03,303 --> 00:13:08,058
This puzzle was going to take you
on adventures all over the neighborhood.
292
00:13:08,141 --> 00:13:10,143
Horseback riding,
hot air ballooning and...
293
00:13:10,727 --> 00:13:14,356
I asked Tahani to be involved because
she did all of those things on Earth.
294
00:13:14,439 --> 00:13:16,274
You've been in paradise for a month,
295
00:13:16,358 --> 00:13:19,027
and you're still so reluctant
to try new activities.
296
00:13:19,110 --> 00:13:22,906
Yeah, I know, I'm just not
a new-experience kind of guy.
297
00:13:22,989 --> 00:13:27,160
I mean, my comfort zone
is basically... that chair.
298
00:13:27,244 --> 00:13:30,205
And, honestly,
the arms are a little sharp.
299
00:13:31,164 --> 00:13:33,917
I want you to believe
that you're safe here.
300
00:13:35,418 --> 00:13:36,294
That you can trust me.
301
00:13:37,337 --> 00:13:39,005
Do you trust me, Chidi?
302
00:13:40,340 --> 00:13:42,259
Yes. I really do.
303
00:13:42,968 --> 00:13:43,927
Then come with me.
304
00:13:44,928 --> 00:13:48,014
These personalized skinsuits
are a true game-changer.
305
00:13:48,098 --> 00:13:51,768
Imagine being able to torment a human
not as yourself,
306
00:13:51,851 --> 00:13:55,105
but as their wife, or ex-wife,
or just some mouthy broad.
307
00:13:55,188 --> 00:13:59,150
They are so convincing,
they even work on a Good Janet!
308
00:13:59,234 --> 00:14:01,027
Jeez!
309
00:14:03,071 --> 00:14:05,323
Ugh. Great, more Vicky.
310
00:14:05,407 --> 00:14:08,785
Hey, your Michael impression stinks
almost as much as your suit.
311
00:14:08,868 --> 00:14:10,495
-Why does everyone keep saying that?
-Pfft. Oof.
312
00:14:10,579 --> 00:14:13,415
Welcome, Janet.
We have a special guest for you today.
313
00:14:14,624 --> 00:14:19,379
Hi, Janet. It's me, Jason.
Your boyfriend.
314
00:14:19,963 --> 00:14:21,506
I really miss you.
315
00:14:22,966 --> 00:14:27,429
I know we were in a fight before,
but I hope you've forgiven me because...
316
00:14:28,430 --> 00:14:30,473
I love you... girl.
317
00:14:31,433 --> 00:14:32,309
Not a girl.
318
00:14:32,851 --> 00:14:34,728
-Well, Janet?
-Yeah.
319
00:14:34,811 --> 00:14:36,271
How's that make you feel?
320
00:14:37,606 --> 00:14:38,815
Terrible.
321
00:14:42,068 --> 00:14:43,361
Adequate work, Glenn.
322
00:14:43,445 --> 00:14:45,447
-Rufus, take the Janet back to her cell.
- No, no, no.
323
00:14:45,530 --> 00:14:48,867
No, please, uh, let us
take Janet back ourselves.
324
00:14:48,950 --> 00:14:51,995
I wanna get a little extra torture time in
on the way there.
325
00:14:52,078 --> 00:14:53,413
I don't see why not.
326
00:14:53,496 --> 00:14:54,372
Hello, dummies.
327
00:14:54,873 --> 00:14:57,042
-It's me, Michael.
328
00:14:57,125 --> 00:15:00,337
I'm just kidding.
It's me, Vicky, in a Michael suit.
329
00:15:02,297 --> 00:15:03,465
What's going on here?
330
00:15:03,548 --> 00:15:06,051
I was never told that I had an understudy.
331
00:15:08,803 --> 00:15:10,805
There you go, buddy.
You're doing great.
332
00:15:11,348 --> 00:15:12,182
Where are we going?
333
00:15:12,265 --> 00:15:14,935
Um... Somewhere fun. Just follow my voice.
334
00:15:18,063 --> 00:15:18,897
Ooh!
335
00:15:19,773 --> 00:15:22,609
This is, uh... kinda fun.
336
00:15:23,652 --> 00:15:26,321
I'm very scared, but also... I like it?
337
00:15:27,238 --> 00:15:29,199
-Hi, there.
-Hi, whoever you are.
338
00:15:29,282 --> 00:15:30,742
Don't mind us.
We're just doing a trust thing.
339
00:15:31,326 --> 00:15:32,369
Hi, there.
340
00:15:33,411 --> 00:15:34,704
What was that sound?
341
00:15:34,788 --> 00:15:36,247
A unicorn died.
342
00:15:36,331 --> 00:15:37,666
-What?
-No.
343
00:15:37,749 --> 00:15:39,250
Not a unicorn, my mistake.
344
00:15:39,334 --> 00:15:42,587
Just a regular horse
that someone stabbed in the head.
345
00:15:43,171 --> 00:15:44,005
What?
346
00:15:45,757 --> 00:15:48,551
What in the name of Kevin Spacey's
self-made Christmas Eve video message
347
00:15:48,635 --> 00:15:50,804
to try to get back on
House of Cards is going on here?
348
00:15:50,887 --> 00:15:51,930
- Mike.
- Who are you?
349
00:15:52,013 --> 00:15:53,056
Who am I?
350
00:15:53,139 --> 00:15:54,766
- Who are you?
-You had this the whole time?
351
00:15:54,849 --> 00:15:57,102
Yeah. I wanted to explode
a bunch of demons,
352
00:15:57,185 --> 00:15:59,229
but you told me I should wait, so I did.
353
00:15:59,312 --> 00:16:02,315
Vicky, why did you build
a second Michael suit?
354
00:16:02,399 --> 00:16:05,068
He didn't. No, I mean, I didn't.
355
00:16:05,151 --> 00:16:06,987
Oh. Look...
356
00:16:11,074 --> 00:16:12,492
It can't be.
357
00:16:12,575 --> 00:16:14,869
Yes, it's true.
358
00:16:14,953 --> 00:16:17,247
It's me, the real Michael.
359
00:16:17,330 --> 00:16:20,625
We know all about your plot
to sabotage our experiment.
360
00:16:20,709 --> 00:16:23,795
We know you brought Chris in
to pretend to be Linda
361
00:16:23,878 --> 00:16:26,840
to distract us
while you planted a Bad Janet
362
00:16:26,923 --> 00:16:28,842
to pretend to be a Good Janet.
363
00:16:30,218 --> 00:16:31,761
No, stop clapping. This is real.
364
00:16:31,845 --> 00:16:32,971
Someone capture them.
365
00:16:33,054 --> 00:16:34,848
Rufus, I'm warning you.
366
00:16:34,931 --> 00:16:36,808
I know we go way back.
We used to be roommates.
367
00:16:36,891 --> 00:16:41,229
But if you take another step,
I will use this demon exploder on you.
368
00:16:41,312 --> 00:16:43,189
A "demon exploder"? Come on, man.
369
00:16:43,273 --> 00:16:45,233
At least try to make
that sound convincing.
370
00:16:47,402 --> 00:16:48,236
Wow.
371
00:16:49,446 --> 00:16:50,280
Touché.
372
00:16:51,698 --> 00:16:53,283
I used to be just like all of you.
373
00:16:53,366 --> 00:16:57,829
I sat right where you're sitting,
at more than 10,000 Demon Cons,
374
00:16:57,912 --> 00:17:00,040
and I believed that we committed torture
375
00:17:00,123 --> 00:17:03,251
as a part of the moral balance
of the universe.
376
00:17:03,334 --> 00:17:05,336
But I've learned that's wrong.
377
00:17:05,420 --> 00:17:08,965
Humans are capable of self-improvement,
and so are we.
378
00:17:09,049 --> 00:17:12,260
And down deep,
Shawn knows this is true, too.
379
00:17:12,761 --> 00:17:16,389
I beg you, open your eyes to the truth.
380
00:17:21,102 --> 00:17:22,145
Bravo, Michael.
381
00:17:22,228 --> 00:17:24,814
What a monologue... not!
382
00:17:28,026 --> 00:17:29,194
I'm not scared of you.
383
00:17:29,277 --> 00:17:33,114
Because I've gone there, Michael.
I've become you.
384
00:17:33,198 --> 00:17:37,869
You may act like you've changed,
but deep down, you're still a demon.
385
00:17:37,952 --> 00:17:42,165
Vile, ugly, capable of so much darkness.
386
00:17:42,248 --> 00:17:43,124
And now...
387
00:17:44,709 --> 00:17:45,543
you're home.
388
00:17:46,961 --> 00:17:48,046
Oh, come on!
389
00:17:49,464 --> 00:17:51,591
- Let's go. Come on.
-Let's go.
390
00:17:51,674 --> 00:17:55,095
No, you morons. Stop
applauding them. They're getting away.
391
00:17:55,595 --> 00:17:59,390
I swear, the production value at Demon Con
gets better every year.
392
00:18:01,184 --> 00:18:03,269
Man, look at this house.
393
00:18:03,353 --> 00:18:05,897
And that beautiful lake.
I can't believe I almost missed all this.
394
00:18:07,232 --> 00:18:09,150
Is this the answer
to the truth about the universe?
395
00:18:09,234 --> 00:18:11,444
-Well--
-Uh... Part of it.
396
00:18:11,528 --> 00:18:13,071
Oh!
397
00:18:13,154 --> 00:18:14,906
The puzzle continues.
398
00:18:14,989 --> 00:18:17,492
Hey, you decided to come after all.
399
00:18:17,575 --> 00:18:18,993
I did.
400
00:18:19,577 --> 00:18:21,621
Thanks to Eleanor and Tahani.
401
00:18:21,704 --> 00:18:23,665
Aw! You two are the best.
402
00:18:23,748 --> 00:18:25,041
Well, that was insane.
403
00:18:25,125 --> 00:18:28,169
But we got through it... together.
404
00:18:29,337 --> 00:18:30,338
No, we didn't.
405
00:18:31,047 --> 00:18:32,006
You got through it.
406
00:18:32,757 --> 00:18:34,717
I almost ruined it a hundred times.
407
00:18:35,218 --> 00:18:37,887
From now on, I'm just gonna
stick to throwing parties,
408
00:18:37,971 --> 00:18:39,472
because it's the only thing I'm good at.
409
00:18:43,268 --> 00:18:44,519
-Hey.
-What?
410
00:18:44,602 --> 00:18:47,480
When I said "throw a party,"
I didn't mean a pity party.
411
00:18:47,564 --> 00:18:50,358
This isn't a pity party.
I'm genuinely sad.
412
00:18:50,441 --> 00:18:53,278
The only thing I can do
is throw pointless parties.
413
00:18:53,361 --> 00:18:55,905
You run the entire neighborhood.
You're so capable.
414
00:18:55,989 --> 00:18:59,534
I have seen you get stuck
in any manner of crazy situation,
415
00:18:59,617 --> 00:19:01,452
and you always figure a way out.
416
00:19:01,536 --> 00:19:05,623
Yeah, man, because I've had to
scrape and claw my way through life,
417
00:19:05,707 --> 00:19:10,211
and you grew up in a castle full of
diamond lamps and golden pillowcases.
418
00:19:10,295 --> 00:19:11,963
You never learned
how to think on your feet.
419
00:19:12,046 --> 00:19:14,215
Look, if the roles were reversed,
420
00:19:14,299 --> 00:19:18,052
and I had to throw a fancy party
to save all of humanity,
421
00:19:18,136 --> 00:19:19,429
I promise we'd be screwed,
422
00:19:19,512 --> 00:19:24,392
because I wouldn't know what salad fork
to put next to the... whatever spoon.
423
00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:28,605
The whatever spoon is really only used
for certain festive jellies.
424
00:19:28,688 --> 00:19:29,606
See?
425
00:19:29,689 --> 00:19:32,483
Babe, the dodos in that house
426
00:19:32,567 --> 00:19:37,197
are literally the four most important
human beings in the universe.
427
00:19:37,280 --> 00:19:39,908
I wanted you to take care of them
because I trust you.
428
00:19:39,991 --> 00:19:41,743
Plus, your parties aren't pointless.
429
00:19:41,826 --> 00:19:44,787
They're opportunities for them
to bond and form friendships.
430
00:19:44,871 --> 00:19:50,335
You know, the thing we need them to do
so we're not all tortured forever?
431
00:19:51,377 --> 00:19:52,212
You're right.
432
00:19:52,837 --> 00:19:54,297
And thank you.
433
00:19:55,006 --> 00:19:56,507
But if we ever get through this,
434
00:19:56,591 --> 00:19:59,510
I want to learn
how to do something meaningful.
435
00:19:59,594 --> 00:20:03,097
A real skill.
Something helpful and fulfilling.
436
00:20:03,181 --> 00:20:05,308
Okay, man, if we survive this,
437
00:20:05,391 --> 00:20:08,436
I promise I will support you while you...
438
00:20:09,229 --> 00:20:11,522
-learn to weld or whatever, deal?
439
00:20:12,607 --> 00:20:13,441
Deal.
440
00:20:19,405 --> 00:20:21,241
That oughta stop them from following us.
441
00:20:21,324 --> 00:20:22,408
So smart.
442
00:20:22,492 --> 00:20:24,118
Nice to have you back, Janet.
443
00:20:24,702 --> 00:20:27,497
That must have been hard for you...
to go back there.
444
00:20:28,998 --> 00:20:29,832
It was.
445
00:20:30,792 --> 00:20:33,753
I don't like thinking about
who I used to be.
446
00:20:33,836 --> 00:20:34,712
Listen, Michael,
447
00:20:34,796 --> 00:20:40,551
it's okay to feel or plead guilty
about bad things you used to do,
448
00:20:40,635 --> 00:20:43,012
but you don't have to feel shame
about who you were,
449
00:20:43,096 --> 00:20:45,515
because you're not a demon anymore.
450
00:20:45,598 --> 00:20:48,226
You're just like a nice, weird,
happy old dude.
451
00:20:48,935 --> 00:20:50,311
Huh.
452
00:20:51,062 --> 00:20:52,272
Thanks for rescuing me.
453
00:20:52,814 --> 00:20:54,023
I missed you so much.
454
00:20:54,107 --> 00:20:55,149
I missed you, too.
455
00:20:55,233 --> 00:20:56,818
Bad Janet was so mean to me.
456
00:20:57,402 --> 00:21:00,947
She told me so many lies.
She said the Jags cut Blake Bortles.
457
00:21:01,030 --> 00:21:01,948
Can you believe that?
458
00:21:02,031 --> 00:21:02,865
Oh, no.
459
00:21:03,491 --> 00:21:04,826
Jason, that wasn't a lie.
460
00:21:05,451 --> 00:21:07,662
Blake Bortles was cut by the Jaguars.
461
00:21:07,745 --> 00:21:09,372
What? How? Why?
462
00:21:10,331 --> 00:21:11,499
Who's their QB now?
463
00:21:11,582 --> 00:21:13,042
A man named Nick Foles.
464
00:21:13,126 --> 00:21:15,003
Nick Foles? Are you kidding me?
465
00:21:16,754 --> 00:21:20,174
He won a Super Bowl!
We're gonna be unstoppable!
466
00:21:20,758 --> 00:21:21,843
Foles!
467
00:21:21,926 --> 00:21:25,763
-Foles!
-Foles!
468
00:21:25,847 --> 00:21:28,182
Oh, no.
Nick Foles just broke his clavicle.
469
00:21:28,266 --> 00:21:30,226
No!