1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,360 This programme contains strong language and adult humour. 2 00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:07,360 Ha-haa! 3 00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:09,320 No way! 4 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:11,800 Er... Gosh! 5 00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:14,080 Where's the hole? 6 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:16,640 Urghh! Ahh! Uhhh... 7 00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:18,840 Are you having a laugh? 8 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:25,160 Ooh!Aghh! 9 00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:35,880 Hello! Hello, everybody, I'm Greg Davies and this is Taskmaster. 10 00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:39,680 There are those that think that this series - series 13 - is cursed. 11 00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:42,040 There are those that say I have the legs of a goat 12 00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:45,160 and can be seen on the moors devouring pork by moonlight. 13 00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:48,240 There are those that think all of the losers of Taskmaster 14 00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:51,680 are done away with and replaced by robots that I use to do my bidding. 15 00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:53,520 There are those that think 16 00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:56,040 I shouldn't write introductions to the show when I'm tired. 17 00:00:56,080 --> 00:00:58,640 And here are five of them. 18 00:00:58,680 --> 00:01:01,840 Ardal O'Hanlon! 19 00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:04,640 Bridget Christie! 20 00:01:04,680 --> 00:01:06,960 Chris Ramsey! 21 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,040 Judi Love! 22 00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:12,000 And Sophie Duker! 23 00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:15,200 And next to me the answer to the question 24 00:01:15,240 --> 00:01:18,560 what would happen if you forced a yak through a sausage machine? 25 00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:20,000 It's... 26 00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:22,400 Little Alex Horne! 27 00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,040 Thank you. 28 00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:29,080 All right, then, love? How are you? 29 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:31,880 I'm excited because I'm just about to say 30 00:01:31,920 --> 00:01:34,680 my millionth word of the year. 31 00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:37,120 I'm now 14 short 32 00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:40,280 and I want you to choose my millionth. 33 00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:51,400 All right. 34 00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:53,600 There you are. 35 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:58,440 Biffins! 36 00:01:58,480 --> 00:02:01,200 That bit between your front and your back. 37 00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:06,440 That's your millionth word. That's my millionth this year. Yep. 38 00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:08,920 There's always next year, isn't there? 39 00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:13,160 Right. What's the prize-task category, please, Alex? 40 00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:17,200 Well, this one's safely up there in our top 109 prize tasks. 41 00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:20,600 We asked them to bring in the best night-time thing. 42 00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:24,840 Ooh. Five points for whomever has brought in the best night-time thing 43 00:02:24,880 --> 00:02:27,856 and at the end of the show, the winner will take home five night-time things 44 00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:31,080 and guarantee themselves a thoroughly good Monday to Friday. 45 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,640 Very good. Judi Love. 46 00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:35,400 I said, erm, 47 00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:37,720 a lovely duvet. 48 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:40,000 Look at it. 49 00:02:40,040 --> 00:02:42,800 This is practical, it keeps you warm 50 00:02:42,840 --> 00:02:46,280 and when you're hot, you can put your foot out of it... 51 00:02:49,880 --> 00:02:52,120 I didn't realise you could put your feet out. Yeah. 52 00:02:52,160 --> 00:02:55,120 I thought they had to stay within the confines... No, no, no. No. 53 00:02:55,160 --> 00:02:58,800 Only special people know this. But you... 54 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:01,640 ..can also use it for camping. 55 00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:04,680 Why are you saying this like... like it's the first time 56 00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:06,800 anyone's ever thought of it? 57 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:09,080 What do you expect from me for that? 58 00:03:09,120 --> 00:03:12,480 "What? You can take it out of the house?!" 59 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:16,320 There's so much stuff you can do with a duvet at night-time. 60 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:19,960 You can make a tent, you can sleep downstairs with it. 61 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,480 Do you know what I mean? 62 00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:25,040 You can play ghost. It would be a big, fat ghost, 63 00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:28,600 but you can play. I mean, the person that doesn't beat duvet, 64 00:03:28,640 --> 00:03:31,360 hang your heads in shame. 65 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:33,320 Genius. Ardal. 66 00:03:33,360 --> 00:03:36,600 Ah, well, obviously, er, night-vision goggles. 67 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:42,720 Ooh! Are they night-vision goggles? 68 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:45,360 Well, they're swimming goggles, but, er... 69 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:49,160 They are the best night-time thing 70 00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:52,280 because when you wake up at night, uh, you can see. 71 00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:54,960 Uh, and I... I... I... 72 00:03:56,920 --> 00:03:59,320 Do you wear them in bed? Of course I wear them in bed! 73 00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:02,840 So when I wake up and if there's someone in the room, I can see them. 74 00:04:02,880 --> 00:04:06,080 So what are the practical applications of night-vision goggles for you? Right. 75 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:08,120 I don't sleep well. And my wife does sleep well, 76 00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:11,720 but she doesn't like me turning the light on at night, so if there's an intruder comes in, 77 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:14,880 I've got a little advantage. Over your wife? 78 00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:18,400 Over my wife. 79 00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:22,040 Um, Sophie, can you beat night-vision goggles? 80 00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:24,640 Uh, I think the best night-time thing 81 00:04:24,680 --> 00:04:26,960 is an owl. But... I mean... 82 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,120 It's... Yeah. 83 00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:32,200 I think... Do you know what? 84 00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:34,520 Already I think she's right! 85 00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:36,640 Already! 86 00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:39,320 I think owls are creatures of the night, 87 00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:41,560 they can... Not only do they have night vision, 88 00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:44,000 but they can see all around. 89 00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:47,360 But, um, owls and people 90 00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,800 don't make great bedfellows. 91 00:04:49,840 --> 00:04:53,160 Oh, it's not a live owl. It's an owl hot-water bottle. 92 00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:55,360 And here it is. 93 00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:57,640 So the thing is it might keep you warm, 94 00:04:57,680 --> 00:05:00,480 but when you're cold, can you put your foot out of it? 95 00:05:04,720 --> 00:05:08,080 Uh, that's how they catch their prey, isn't it, on heat. 96 00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:10,880 On heat? I think... Their eyesight is actually, um... 97 00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:13,360 Their eyes are actually bigger than their brains. Oh, right. 98 00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:18,080 Which means sometimes it looks at a crossword and thinks, "I can do that", but it can't. 99 00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:21,760 It's not as clever as it thinks it is. 100 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,480 It's a hot-water bottle, but it's a cute one. 101 00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:26,880 Might get you two points, let's see. Chris. 102 00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:29,040 A bed. A bed. He's brought a bed in. 103 00:05:29,080 --> 00:05:32,040 Oh, Chris. I mean, honestly, 104 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:35,960 that is so basic. Shall we list things you can do on a bed? 105 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:40,200 Yeah. Yeah... Every single thing you said plus it's a trampoline. 106 00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:42,720 Any special features? 107 00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:45,360 Er, memory-foam mattress. That's the mattress though. 108 00:05:45,400 --> 00:05:47,440 They don't work. I got one of them. 109 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:49,640 It doesn't remember me. 110 00:05:55,840 --> 00:05:58,400 It rejects me! 111 00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:01,960 All right, Chris. Bridget, hello. Hi. What have you brought in? 112 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:05,080 A fox. 113 00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:08,080 Aww! 114 00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:11,040 You brought in the natural predator of the owl. 115 00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:14,800 Why's it the best night-time thing? 116 00:06:14,840 --> 00:06:18,040 I think they're magical and, er, they're all around us all the time 117 00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:20,800 and we don't notice them. The amount of films 118 00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:23,600 and in literature and in Japanese folklore... 119 00:06:23,640 --> 00:06:25,840 You have convinced me that the fox means a lot to you. 120 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:28,641 They're in... They skulk around the suburbs in the middle of the night 121 00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:31,800 like a jazz drummer trying to score heroin. They don't skulk... 122 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:39,640 Right, score some points. Yes, what is the best night-time thing? 123 00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:43,040 Shall we start with the worst? OK, what's the worst? 124 00:06:43,080 --> 00:06:46,000 Judi Love. And unfortunately, Chris, 125 00:06:46,040 --> 00:06:49,320 I'm sure your bed's absolutely lovely, but I must only give it two points. 126 00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:52,120 Sophie's coy owl will take three points. 127 00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:56,280 Coy owl. So it is night-time goggles versus fox. 128 00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:58,800 The idea of him in night-vision goggles, 129 00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:01,560 it delights me that one point more. That is my judgement. 130 00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:04,280 There we go, Ardal O'Hanlon gets five points! 131 00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:09,480 Let's have a task proper. OK, then. 132 00:07:09,520 --> 00:07:12,240 Well, I have a big task for you 133 00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:14,560 set in a little church. 134 00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:35,200 Ohh. 135 00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:38,040 It's like a sample sale. 136 00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:42,240 This is like a nightmare. 137 00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:46,360 It's like Blair Witch or something. Sponsored by JD Sports. 138 00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:50,440 "Display the shoe Alex is thinking of." 139 00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:55,360 "All the other shoes must be out of sight at the end of your attempt." 140 00:07:55,400 --> 00:07:58,120 "You may only ask yes or no questions and you must say, 141 00:07:58,160 --> 00:08:01,440 "'I have to find the shoe' after every answer." 142 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:03,480 "You must shout, 143 00:08:03,520 --> 00:08:06,280 "'No way! after every answer." 144 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:10,840 I must say "OK, just one more thing" after every answer. 145 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:15,000 I must laugh with disbelief after every answer. 146 00:08:15,040 --> 00:08:18,600 I must get increasingly exasperated 147 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:20,560 after every answer. 148 00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:23,280 "Fewest questions wins." 149 00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:25,080 "Your time starts now." 150 00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:27,400 So this is like Guess Who 151 00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:30,120 with shoes. So what's it called? 152 00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:32,880 Shoe Who. OK. 153 00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:35,080 Guess Shoe. Yeah. OK. 154 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:37,520 If you think I'm not thinking of a particular shoe, 155 00:08:37,560 --> 00:08:41,560 please pop it out of that window. I will be counting any questions you ask. 156 00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:44,840 Maybe I don't have to ask any questions. 157 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:47,440 It's one tactic. Mmm. 158 00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:49,480 Do you like shoes? Yes. 159 00:08:49,520 --> 00:08:52,680 No way! So that's... 160 00:08:52,720 --> 00:08:54,920 That's what we've got to do. 161 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:57,520 No way. 162 00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:04,440 That's the opener you went with, is it? "Do you like shoes?" 163 00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:07,000 Yeah. Bit annoyed that that got counted. 164 00:09:07,040 --> 00:09:10,160 I counted every question. Every question. 165 00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:13,440 Right, let's crack on. Yes. As this task is taking place in a church, 166 00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:15,840 who better to start with than a bit of "Christie 'n' Love"? 167 00:09:15,880 --> 00:09:19,640 Bridget Christie 'n' Judi Love. 168 00:09:19,680 --> 00:09:22,240 Can I have some gloves, please? 169 00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:26,400 You cold? No, I don't like touching shoes. Oh. 170 00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:29,520 Is the shoe you're thinking of... Is that how we do it? 171 00:09:29,560 --> 00:09:31,640 Oh, that's a question, isn't it? 172 00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:33,320 Trainers? No. 173 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:35,320 Ha-haa! 174 00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:39,320 Is it a baby's shoe? 175 00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:41,480 No. Is it an adult... Please say... 176 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:44,480 Just one more thing. OK, just one more thing. OK, just one more thing. 177 00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:47,440 Is it an adult's shoe? Yes. 178 00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:51,160 OK, just one more thing. 179 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:54,440 Football boots? No. A-ha-haa! 180 00:09:54,480 --> 00:09:56,440 Is it a man's shoe? No. 181 00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:01,880 Is... Is it these? No. 182 00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:03,440 Is it these? No. 183 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:05,920 So it's not those. Is it these? No. 184 00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:08,480 Off you pop. Is it these? No. 185 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:10,760 Is it these? You haven't said, "OK, just one more thing." 186 00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:13,920 OK, just one more thing. Is it these? No. 187 00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:16,520 Does your toe show? Yes, it does. 188 00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:18,000 Ha-haaah! 189 00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:20,360 It's not those. Is it? 190 00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:23,640 Oh, you still asked a question. What? No. 191 00:10:23,680 --> 00:10:27,480 Alex? Hello, Judi. I think you should take those down for me. 192 00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:30,000 Oh, right, OK. And these. 193 00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:35,000 Out the window, is it? Yes, Alex, out the window. 194 00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:40,480 Thank you, Judi. 195 00:10:42,080 --> 00:10:44,280 OK, just one more thing. Is it the bowling shoes? 196 00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:48,160 No. So I have to get those down now? That's another question. 197 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:51,040 Is it any of those? No. Is it on the back row? No. 198 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:54,096 OK, just one more thing. Is it these? No. OK, just one more thing. Is it these? 199 00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:57,480 OK, just one more thing... One more... One more... Is it a pair of shoes? 200 00:10:57,520 --> 00:11:00,320 Mm, no. 201 00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:03,920 I've got one. That's not good enough. 202 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,200 Is it a bright shoe, Alex? 203 00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:09,720 Is it a bright colour? Is it a bright colour, Alex? 204 00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:12,800 Yes. You did ask me that question five times. 205 00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:16,000 No, no, don't take the piss. Right. 206 00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:19,040 Is it those? You've just asked me about those. Oh, yeah. 207 00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:22,760 Alex, are these your dutty shoes? 208 00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:26,640 Sort of. 209 00:11:26,680 --> 00:11:29,240 There must've been a pair that I missed. 210 00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:31,960 Right, I'll have to go through them individually again though. 211 00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:35,680 Is this the shoe? 212 00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:36,960 Yes. 213 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:40,000 It's not these either. No. It isn't these? No. 214 00:11:40,040 --> 00:11:42,360 And you also said no for these. Yeah. 215 00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:44,360 I'm having a deja vu. 216 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,680 How would you like to display it? 217 00:11:48,640 --> 00:11:51,640 Thank God we're in a church because I would tell you some words. 218 00:11:51,680 --> 00:11:53,920 Bye, Alex. Bye, Judi. 219 00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:56,240 OK, just one more thing. None of these shoes? 220 00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:59,040 Yes. 221 00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:01,800 OK, just one more thing. Is it one of these? Yes. 222 00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:04,320 OK, just one more thing. Is it that shoe? Yes. 223 00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:07,200 Oh, my God. 224 00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:09,720 And then if you could turn round. 225 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:11,760 Right, I can't see any shoes. 226 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:14,520 OK, thanks, bye. Bye-bye. 227 00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:23,360 Bridget, you and I have sort of known each other on and off for a few years now. 228 00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:25,920 Yeah. And it's only after watching that VT 229 00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:29,760 for the first time did I question your intelligence. 230 00:12:29,800 --> 00:12:32,480 I was cursed by something in the church. 231 00:12:34,440 --> 00:12:36,440 It had been deconsecrated, the church. 232 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:39,376 But it does make some sense because you did say quite a lot more questions 233 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:43,600 than there were shoes. Wow. How many questions did she ask? 234 00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:46,240 161 questions. No! 235 00:12:46,280 --> 00:12:49,200 That's quite something. And I'll tell you something else - 236 00:12:49,240 --> 00:12:51,640 it's the first time in 13 series 237 00:12:51,680 --> 00:12:54,600 that I've seen Alex Horne genuinely irritated. Yeah. 238 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:57,720 Let's have a look at Alex Horne 239 00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:00,080 genuinely annoyed. 240 00:13:00,120 --> 00:13:01,920 It's not those, is it? 241 00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:04,280 Oh, you still asked a question. What? 242 00:13:04,320 --> 00:13:05,960 No! 243 00:13:08,560 --> 00:13:11,200 Yeah, I don't like that. I don't like seeing that. 244 00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:14,760 Please can I say something about that? Yeah. I could see how annoyed he was. 245 00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:17,160 And that wasn't very supportive. 246 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:25,000 I thought Judi seemed pretty efficient to me. 247 00:13:25,040 --> 00:13:28,200 Yes. 24 questions. Yeah, you tricked me on some of those questions. 248 00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:30,880 You say 23, let's take off three of them so we got 21, yeah? 249 00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:33,880 20. Or 20. 20 or 24 questions from Judi. 250 00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:37,120 Yep. Right. We're stopping to catch our breath. 251 00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:40,280 There will be more shoes after the break. Shoo! You! 252 00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:43,200 Then come back for shoe! New shoe, for you! 253 00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:55,200 Hello again and welcome back to the second part of tonight's show. 254 00:13:55,240 --> 00:13:57,760 Quick reminder of the task in play, please, Alex. 255 00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:59,920 Everyone is trying to guess my shoe, Greg. 256 00:13:59,960 --> 00:14:02,360 Fewest questions wins. Next up, it's Sophie Duker 257 00:14:02,400 --> 00:14:04,400 and Chris Ramsey! 258 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:07,480 No way! 259 00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:09,400 Is it a sporting shoe? No. 260 00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:11,160 No way! 261 00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,560 Does the shoe 262 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:17,760 have laces? 263 00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:19,360 No. 264 00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:24,240 Would you class this as a sport? No. 265 00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,480 No way! 266 00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:29,280 Can I have these ones? Now, then, is that a question? 267 00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:31,200 No! 268 00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:33,440 You were quite exasperated then. 269 00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:36,600 So I'm just not allowed to ask questions? Now, is that a question? 270 00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:38,240 Oh, my God! 271 00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:42,320 I should've said "sporty". Because there's a grey area here. 272 00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:46,440 Ah. You're putting on the fish shoes. Yeah. 273 00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:49,120 Does the shoe you're thinking of 274 00:14:49,160 --> 00:14:51,200 have laces? No. 275 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:52,640 No way! 276 00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:57,000 No grey area here, Chris. The grey area has gone. 277 00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:01,600 Does it have, like, a heel 278 00:15:01,640 --> 00:15:03,560 with height? 279 00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:06,080 Do you understand the question? Now, was that a question, 280 00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:08,320 whether I understood the question? 281 00:15:08,360 --> 00:15:10,280 Does it have a heel? 282 00:15:10,320 --> 00:15:12,080 No. No. 283 00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:15,040 Not really. What do you mean, "Not really"? It's a yes or no question. 284 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:17,680 I think all shoes have heels. No, they don't. 285 00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:19,720 Does this have a heel of height? 286 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,560 So there's another question. 287 00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:24,600 Are you getting exasperated? 288 00:15:26,120 --> 00:15:29,960 Does the shoe you're thinking of have a closed toe? No. 289 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:31,240 No way! 290 00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:33,640 Right. Can you tell me how many questions I've asked? 291 00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:36,400 So with that one, seven. No! 292 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:39,760 No! Well, at least you're getting exasperated. 293 00:15:39,800 --> 00:15:42,320 Is the shoe you're thinking of 294 00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:44,760 on my right? No. 295 00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:46,840 No way! 296 00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:51,480 Is the shoe you're thinking of on that side of the room? 297 00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:53,920 No. 298 00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:58,520 Is the shoe you're thinking of on my right? Yes. 299 00:15:58,560 --> 00:15:59,960 No way! 300 00:16:02,640 --> 00:16:05,320 Which one do you want? Both. Both my shoes. 301 00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:07,160 Hm. 302 00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:09,360 You threw them further than the others. Yeah. 303 00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:19,920 No, that was wrong, that was wrong. The closed-toe thing, 304 00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:22,320 I've confused meself. 305 00:16:24,880 --> 00:16:28,000 Didn't seem very exasperated. 306 00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:32,240 OK, it does, it does. 307 00:16:32,280 --> 00:16:34,600 Ooh. Does the shoe you're thinking of 308 00:16:34,640 --> 00:16:36,880 have a buckle on it? No. 309 00:16:36,920 --> 00:16:39,120 No way! 310 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:45,280 Would the shoe that you're thinking of make you feel bold 311 00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:47,040 and ballerinas? 312 00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:48,560 Yes. 313 00:16:49,720 --> 00:16:51,600 Are you thinking of the right shoe? 314 00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:53,080 No. 315 00:17:03,800 --> 00:17:06,320 Thank you, Chris. Thanks, Alex. 316 00:17:06,360 --> 00:17:09,080 Weirdly fun. Weirdly fun. 317 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:16,920 Chris Ramsey enters all tasks like a bouncy, happy puppy. 318 00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:19,880 Yes. And he was the only person not to leave that room hating you. 319 00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:22,440 Yes. As evidenced by Sophie's face... 320 00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:24,600 Yep. 321 00:17:24,640 --> 00:17:27,720 By the end of it, I just thought you wanted to murder him. 322 00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:29,120 Yes. 323 00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:31,160 I think I was getting increasingly exasperated 324 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:34,880 but forgetting that was what you'd asked me to do. 325 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:38,120 Both similar systems. The geography system is the way to do it. 326 00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:41,720 If you just divided them in half each time, you'd get the shoe in seven questions. 327 00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:43,680 What Chris did well, he barely wasted a question. 328 00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:46,880 13 in total. Pretty impressive. 329 00:17:46,920 --> 00:17:49,360 But the woman who'd like to squeeze the life out of you... 330 00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:51,720 Yes. Er, 30 in total. 331 00:17:51,760 --> 00:17:55,080 It just leaves Ardal to go. He threatened to complete the task 332 00:17:55,120 --> 00:17:58,200 without asking any questions at all. High hopes here. 333 00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:00,600 Let's see how he got on. 334 00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:02,160 Um, 335 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,360 is it a blue shoe? No. 336 00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:07,760 It's not a blue shoe? Was that... No, no, no, that's one question! 337 00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:11,720 I have to find the shoe. 338 00:18:13,600 --> 00:18:17,840 Is it a shoe that you would mainly use for sports? 339 00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:21,760 No. I have to find the shoe. Basketball. 340 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:23,920 Bowling. 341 00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:25,960 Walking is a sport. OK. 342 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:28,200 I would argue most shoes are for walking. 343 00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:30,520 Well, that's where we differ, Alex. 344 00:18:32,360 --> 00:18:35,520 Would you wear this particular shoe 345 00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:38,040 to a funeral? 346 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:40,560 No. You wouldn't wear it to a funeral? 347 00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:42,640 Well, I certainly wouldn't, no. No. 348 00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:45,040 You wouldn't wear these unless you were... 349 00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:47,600 ..going to Elvis's funeral or something. 350 00:18:49,120 --> 00:18:51,840 No, you wouldn't wear your white ones to a funeral. 351 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:55,720 Well, I did say I wouldn't wear my shoe to a funeral. 352 00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,720 You wouldn't wear the shoe to a funeral. 353 00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:12,720 Oh, you wouldn't wear it, OK. 354 00:19:15,480 --> 00:19:17,320 Is it a... 355 00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:19,440 Is it a left shoe? 356 00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:21,000 Yes. 357 00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:22,880 It is a left shoe. 358 00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,920 OK... I need to... find its counterpart. 359 00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:29,240 I have to find the shoe. 360 00:19:29,280 --> 00:19:31,600 You would wear those to a funeral. Of course you would. 361 00:19:31,640 --> 00:19:33,840 These you would. Oh, yeah. 362 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:36,720 Course you would! 363 00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:41,920 Not going to wear sandals to a funeral. I suppose kids get away with murder. 364 00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:44,560 They could wear whatever they want. Not going to wear them. 365 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:47,400 Wouldn't wear those. 366 00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:54,600 I have to find the shoe... 367 00:19:56,560 --> 00:19:59,440 But not these two. So... 368 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:01,560 ..I'm going to go with... 369 00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,320 Is that the shoe you were thinking of? No. 370 00:20:08,280 --> 00:20:10,280 What do you have to do? 371 00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:12,440 I have to find the shoe. 372 00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:26,680 Is it a red shoe? 373 00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:30,480 Is it reddish? Yes. 374 00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:32,960 I have to find the shoe. 375 00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,840 Could you pass that sandaly one there? 376 00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:37,800 This? Yeah, that one. 377 00:20:37,840 --> 00:20:40,840 OK, I want to display this. Is this the shoe? 378 00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:42,840 Yes. Is it?! 379 00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:44,600 Yeah. 380 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:50,200 Wow! 381 00:20:52,240 --> 00:20:54,600 Oh, my God. Wow. 382 00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:57,200 Before that, uh, lucky twist of fate at the end, 383 00:20:57,240 --> 00:20:59,440 I would say a more heart-breaking image 384 00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:01,760 than Ardal sitting on a cage of shoes 385 00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:04,720 you'll struggle to see... 386 00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:07,960 I can read you out his last two questions. They're quite heart-breaking. Please. 387 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,960 The last two were "Will Taskmaster be happy?" 388 00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,240 and "Can you help me get back in?" 389 00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:20,000 Taskmaster's very happy! 390 00:21:20,040 --> 00:21:22,040 With the wisdom of hindsight, 391 00:21:22,080 --> 00:21:24,320 was your funeral system the best system? 392 00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:29,760 In theory, it was, but I do blame Alex. Ah. 393 00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:33,360 Er, I asked a simple question - "Would you wear it to a funeral?" 394 00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:35,880 and he said something like, "I wouldn't not wear it..." 395 00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:39,000 I think I said, "No." Did you?! 396 00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:41,520 How many questions? 40. 397 00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:44,240 Oh! I mean, second last, but not last 398 00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:46,680 by 121 questions. 399 00:21:48,480 --> 00:21:51,760 Well, look, Bridget one point for 161 questions 400 00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:53,800 then it's Ardal, Sophie, Judi. 401 00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:55,840 Chris, just 13 questions, five points! 402 00:21:55,880 --> 00:21:58,280 There it is! 403 00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:02,840 Scoreboard, please. It's the closest episode of the series so far. 404 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:05,280 There's just two separating all five of them. 405 00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:08,080 We have joint leaders - Ardal and Chris - on seven points. 406 00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:12,600 Pretty close. Pretty close. 407 00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:15,440 Have you got another one ready? Ooh, yes. Ooh! 408 00:22:15,480 --> 00:22:18,000 Yes, and I've got some lovely news - unless you're my wife - 409 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,160 I'm getting married again! 410 00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:37,120 After you, Chris. 411 00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:39,960 Oh, thank you very much. Braver than me. Kind of you. 412 00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:42,280 Hello, Bridget. Ah. 413 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:45,120 Hello. Oh, you've brought Sophie. 414 00:22:45,160 --> 00:22:47,160 I did, yes. Oh, and Judi. Judi's here as well. 415 00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:49,920 Yeah. Yeah. That's nice. 416 00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:52,280 So, shall we? 417 00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:54,800 Go on, you can. OK. 418 00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:57,880 "Give Alex the best stag minute." 419 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:03,400 "By the end of the stag minute, 420 00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:05,600 "Alex must be ready to get married." 421 00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:09,120 "You have 29 minutes to prepare for the stag minute." 422 00:23:09,160 --> 00:23:11,520 "Your time starts now." 423 00:23:11,560 --> 00:23:14,560 So the obvious thing is to... 424 00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:16,760 ..pour flour on him. Yeah. 425 00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:20,680 Like a stag do but in a minute. Who's going to be... Who's going to be... 426 00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:22,880 ..the twerkin'... 427 00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:27,120 Twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk. Do all men have stag dos like that now? 428 00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:29,720 I thought that was quite an old-fashioned thing, wasn't it? 429 00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:33,200 I think they do things like book readings and things now, don't they? 430 00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:34,560 Really? 431 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:38,400 I mean, humiliation is the main part of this. OK. 432 00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:40,720 Because I think... I think TM would like to see 433 00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:42,960 Alex be utterly humiliated. 434 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:46,600 Erm, it's my stag minute, so I... It's going to be a surprise for me, 435 00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:49,520 so I'm going to leave you to it. Oh, it's going to be a surprise. OK. Oh. 436 00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:54,560 OK, we've got to make him have a nice time. 437 00:23:54,600 --> 00:23:56,960 I think he likes birds. 438 00:23:57,000 --> 00:24:00,280 Birds? And then we could watch him through binoculars or... 439 00:24:00,320 --> 00:24:03,080 He'd probably like that. Serve him worms. 440 00:24:03,120 --> 00:24:05,560 Can the bird be wearing a thong? 441 00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:14,160 If you're about to show me an actual bird twerking, 442 00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:16,840 you might have this in the bag. 443 00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,560 Who are we going to see first, please? 444 00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:22,000 Let's see how the bloody lads got on. 445 00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:27,800 Hey! Hey! 446 00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:30,320 Come on, Horne dog! Hey-hey! 447 00:24:30,360 --> 00:24:32,440 Hi, guys. Are you ready for your stag do? 448 00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:35,000 Yeah, it's going to be the best minute of your life! Hey! 449 00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:38,080 Hey, grab your parachute! Hey, Horne dog! Lads, lads, lads! 450 00:24:38,120 --> 00:24:40,280 Horne dog! OK, on the count of three! 451 00:24:40,320 --> 00:24:43,240 Three, two, one... 452 00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:46,640 Horne dog! Horne dog! Porn mag! Porn mag! 453 00:24:46,680 --> 00:24:49,040 Come on, Horney! Horney, get your mask on. 454 00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:51,200 This is dangerous now, I'm serious. 455 00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:54,080 We're doing milk-balling. Milk-balling! We're doing what? 456 00:24:54,120 --> 00:24:57,040 Milk-balling!What do I do? 457 00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:04,320 Come on! Beer and curry! Beer and curry with the lads! 458 00:25:04,360 --> 00:25:06,520 Cheers, lads. Cheers. 459 00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:09,680 Lads, lads... 460 00:25:12,160 --> 00:25:14,200 Oh, no. Oh, we've got him! 461 00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:16,480 What are you going to do? 462 00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:19,280 What you going to do? What you going to do? 463 00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:21,440 I can't get it on! What you going to do? 464 00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:23,680 Eat the key, eat the key. Eat the keys? 465 00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:25,960 Not you. Come on! 466 00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:34,840 They've gone. 467 00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:38,560 It looked like you had the time of your life. 468 00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:41,960 I genuinely got an adrenalin rush watching it back. 469 00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:43,840 It was so exciting! 470 00:25:43,880 --> 00:25:45,880 There was one little bit I was confused by 471 00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:48,760 and that was when you put my face over your heads 472 00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:51,880 and then you appeared to throw milk at each other with a teaspoon. 473 00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:54,120 Let us explain. Erm... 474 00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:56,480 It was supposed to be paintballing. It was paintballing, 475 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:58,960 so we wore masks of Alex's favourite person. 476 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:01,880 Yeah, yeah. And the game was renamed... 477 00:26:01,920 --> 00:26:04,000 Milk-balling. Milk-balling. 478 00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:07,400 And the little drink and the tiny snack was... 479 00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:09,880 Curry. A shot of beer and a bite of curry. 480 00:26:09,920 --> 00:26:12,680 And we did the traditional thing of tying him to a lamp post. 481 00:26:12,720 --> 00:26:14,960 To a lamp post. Right. 482 00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:17,640 It's time for us all to have a lovely, well-deserved break. 483 00:26:17,680 --> 00:26:20,200 Not you, Alex! See you soon. 484 00:26:28,360 --> 00:26:32,360 Hello! Come in, settle down, pop your feet up. 485 00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:34,440 Yes, hi, guys, welcome to our little home. 486 00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:36,520 We're very happy together, aren't we, Greg? 487 00:26:36,560 --> 00:26:39,360 Get your fucking hand off me. Before the... 488 00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:43,360 Sorry... 489 00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:50,960 Before the break... 490 00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:53,320 ..I announced my upcoming marriage and during the break, 491 00:26:53,360 --> 00:26:55,360 I received quite a cross message from my wife. 492 00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:58,880 The task was to give me the best stag minute. 493 00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:02,280 Next up, it's time for the girls. 494 00:27:02,320 --> 00:27:03,960 Alex! 495 00:27:04,000 --> 00:27:07,080 Yes? Come with me. 496 00:27:07,120 --> 00:27:10,360 OK, there's a step. Yes, I know there's a step here. OK. 497 00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:13,240 You're going to have the best stag do of your bloody life. 498 00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:15,880 Sit down on the stool in front of you. Open your legs. 499 00:27:15,920 --> 00:27:18,080 Open your legs. How many hands are on me? 500 00:27:18,120 --> 00:27:20,320 Keep going. In, in. In? 501 00:27:20,360 --> 00:27:21,720 In. 502 00:27:21,760 --> 00:27:25,720 Left leg. Just keep leaning forward. Why? 503 00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:28,520 Three, two, 504 00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:30,960 one... Good, OK! 505 00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,320 Here you go. Put your arm through. 506 00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:35,560 Through there. Lovely. Shot. 507 00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:39,320 Shot. 508 00:27:39,360 --> 00:27:41,800 Shot... 509 00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,000 Eat your fucking worm! 510 00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:47,840 Ow! Ow! 511 00:27:47,880 --> 00:27:49,320 Why? 512 00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:54,320 What are you... Just keep your head still! 513 00:27:54,360 --> 00:27:56,760 I'm trying to eat a worm! Tweet, tweet, tweet. 514 00:27:56,800 --> 00:27:58,960 Meow! Meow... 515 00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:00,840 Meow. 516 00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:02,920 Meow? 517 00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:05,000 Meow. 518 00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:07,480 Whistle like a bird. I'm making... Hoo! 519 00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,760 That's an owl! Whistle! 520 00:28:14,840 --> 00:28:17,480 Blimey. 521 00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:19,280 Meow. 522 00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:21,160 Meow... 523 00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:24,320 Meow. 524 00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,240 Right. Thank you, everyone. 525 00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:32,360 I'm ready to get married. 526 00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:38,240 Wow. 527 00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:43,880 If I didn't know it was a stag do, I'd think it was some awful... 528 00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:47,760 ..captured video from Guantanamo Bay, to be honest. 529 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:49,480 Bird bath. We had a bath. 530 00:28:49,520 --> 00:28:52,880 We caught him. All things that have got nothing to do with a stag do. 531 00:28:52,920 --> 00:28:55,456 No, but it was personal, wasn't it? Yeah, it was personal to him. 532 00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:57,840 He likes birds, it was something blue for his wedding. 533 00:28:57,880 --> 00:29:01,320 Can I just make it clear, my dad loves birds. 534 00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:03,200 That's it. You was enjoying yourself. 535 00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:06,400 I was stimulated, yes. Did you hear that? I heard that he was stimulated. 536 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:09,800 He was stimulated because people were throwing birdseed 537 00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:11,880 in the man... in the man's face! 538 00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:15,920 We fed him... While a twerking cat waxed his arm! 539 00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:20,280 Yes, I know what you're going to say, you were feeding him worms... 540 00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:22,320 From my mouth! Because we all heard you say, 541 00:29:22,360 --> 00:29:25,080 "Just eat your fucking worm!" 542 00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:29,640 Can we say... We stuck to the tradition, 543 00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:31,800 right? You did not. 544 00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:33,880 Well, look, they've said their pieces. 545 00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:36,960 As an outside observer, my observation is 546 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:38,840 that Alex might've marginally 547 00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:41,880 enjoyed the more traditional stag do a little more 548 00:29:41,920 --> 00:29:45,600 in that he wasn't having alcohol and birdseed thrown in his face 549 00:29:45,640 --> 00:29:48,560 while a mad twerking cat waxed his arm. 550 00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:50,400 That's all I'm saying. 551 00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:53,120 I'm going to give four points to the ladies... 552 00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:55,120 Mm-hm. ..and five points to the gentlemen. 553 00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:57,720 There we go, five to Ardal and Chris! 554 00:29:57,760 --> 00:29:59,600 Come on! Wonderful! 555 00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:01,760 Girls, we done great, we done great. 556 00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:03,800 And yours was great. Thank you. 557 00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:07,160 I'm going to find that puss-face and I'm coming for you. 558 00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:12,880 Onward, please. Yes, onwards and what's the best thing in the world? 559 00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:15,120 Bunting! Off we go. 560 00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:21,080 My name's Greg Davies... 561 00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:24,520 I am the Taskmaster... the Taskmaster... 562 00:30:24,560 --> 00:30:26,840 ..the Taskmaster... 563 00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:33,440 Hi. Is that Bridget? 564 00:30:33,480 --> 00:30:35,440 Hi. Yes. Hello. 565 00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:37,240 Hi, Ardal. Hi, Alex. 566 00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:39,240 Ah... Oh, what does that say? 567 00:30:39,280 --> 00:30:41,280 Ooh. Ooh. 568 00:30:41,320 --> 00:30:45,200 Feel like I'm running through gardens again when I was a kid, dodging washing lines. 569 00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:47,120 Do you like what you see? 570 00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:49,720 Letters. Mm. Yeah. 571 00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:52,200 I'm good at letters. 572 00:30:52,240 --> 00:30:55,880 "Make a stirring speech for the Taskmaster 573 00:30:55,920 --> 00:30:57,880 "out of this bunting." 574 00:30:57,920 --> 00:30:59,920 "Longest speech 575 00:30:59,960 --> 00:31:04,240 "that is deemed to be stirring by the Taskmaster wins." 576 00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:07,760 "You may only use the letters currently on the bunting." 577 00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:09,760 "You have 15 minutes." 578 00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,200 "Your time starts now." 579 00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:15,000 Yes. Are you serious? Yes. 580 00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:16,800 OK. 581 00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:20,160 OK. Do you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to make words. Mm-hm. 582 00:31:20,200 --> 00:31:24,320 And then I'm going to make a sentence out of the words. 583 00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:26,040 OK... 584 00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:30,040 One, two, three. 585 00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:34,560 How can there be no Bs? What kind of alphabet is this? 586 00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:37,480 Why are they all... Are they all weird letters? 587 00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:39,480 There must be one B. Why? 588 00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:43,320 But why would there be no B? Why would there be no B?! 589 00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:46,880 And the colour coordination's not vital either. 590 00:31:46,920 --> 00:31:48,120 OK. 591 00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:50,440 Is this supposed to say a particular thing? 592 00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:53,760 How long have I got left? 12 and a half. Oh, my God! 593 00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:55,440 Aghh! Come on! 594 00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:57,960 Have you made a stirring speech before, Bridget? 595 00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:02,040 I'm no Malcolm X! Oh, right... Treat... 596 00:32:02,080 --> 00:32:04,040 - Why are there so many letters? - Erm... 597 00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:06,000 Aghh! This is horrible! 598 00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:09,120 Sake. This is why I've got a dryer. 599 00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:10,560 Whoo! 600 00:32:10,600 --> 00:32:13,400 Let me... Nice. 601 00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:16,840 I don't like the first bit. Well, maybe I should change that. 602 00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:21,000 Don't need that. Doesn't scan. 603 00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:23,720 We'll just have to use that. Oh, that's quite powerful. 604 00:32:23,760 --> 00:32:26,560 OK, I'm done. 605 00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:30,560 Do you think other people, Alex, will... 606 00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:32,840 ..will come up with the same speech? 607 00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:35,520 No, I would be very surprised. Mm. Mm. 608 00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:41,960 They all found it very stressful. 609 00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:44,080 Very stressful. Oh, it was horrible. 610 00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:47,960 But you, initially, were full of memories of your northern childhood, 611 00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:52,560 running through gardens... Yeah, until you told us spelling was involved! 612 00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:56,320 Well, we're looking for the longest speech that you deem to be stirring. 613 00:32:56,360 --> 00:32:59,680 Stirring. Here is Chris Ramsey's speech. 614 00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:01,040 Oh, God. 615 00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:06,680 Sir, 616 00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:09,240 on my knee, 617 00:33:09,280 --> 00:33:13,160 I implore you, please, 618 00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:15,320 let me win 619 00:33:15,360 --> 00:33:17,360 this task. 620 00:33:18,640 --> 00:33:20,200 M, 621 00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:23,400 good, raa-aaa, 622 00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:25,160 Dad. 623 00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:33,280 Dad? Called you Dad. Called you Dad at the end. 624 00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:35,200 I did like it. Did that stir you? 625 00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:37,600 It did stir me. I thought... Probably not in the right way. 626 00:33:37,640 --> 00:33:40,080 I didn't know we could do it on the floor. 627 00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:43,320 No-one said we could do it on the floor. All the information was on the task. 628 00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:51,480 It was stirring stuff. Mm-hm. What about the "Please let me win"? 629 00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:54,840 What's stirring about that? That appeals to my grotesque ego. 630 00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:57,440 I think the boy played a blinder, to be honest. Hohh... 631 00:33:57,480 --> 00:34:01,040 Well, then, it's very simple, isn't it? Suck up to you and you win. 632 00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:02,880 Yeah. 633 00:34:02,920 --> 00:34:04,920 It's not rocket science. 634 00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:10,160 Christopher, I thought it was a very good start. Who's next? 635 00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:13,200 Here is what Sophie Duker did. 636 00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:16,720 God damn, 637 00:34:16,760 --> 00:34:19,720 if Sophie Duker wins Taskmaster, 638 00:34:19,760 --> 00:34:22,920 we all win her papa! 639 00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:30,720 I also called him Dad. Yeah. Very good. 640 00:34:30,760 --> 00:34:33,280 Papa or Pa-pa, 641 00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:36,400 as some people pronounce it, is a more reverential... 642 00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:39,200 Oh, was that directed at me, "Papa"? 643 00:34:39,240 --> 00:34:41,240 If you like it. 644 00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:47,080 I thought it was stirring. Yeah, I mean, it started with "God damn." 645 00:34:47,120 --> 00:34:49,480 Yes, but it was similar grovelling sentiments to... 646 00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:52,440 It wasn't grovelling, it was self-sacrificing. 647 00:34:52,480 --> 00:34:55,040 I would say also this has happened in shows before this series 648 00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:58,400 where Ardal has criticised a lot of people's attempts, 649 00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:01,120 partly building up to what I know he's done. 650 00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:07,320 If you just bear this... bear this in mind. 651 00:35:07,360 --> 00:35:10,600 Good. Let's crack on. OK. Here is writer, stand-up 652 00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:13,800 and all-round wordsmith Bridget Christie's attempt. 653 00:35:15,080 --> 00:35:17,800 Treat others carelessly, oik... 654 00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:21,320 ..wind... 655 00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:24,440 Wind 656 00:35:24,480 --> 00:35:26,280 is God. 657 00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:27,680 Wait! 658 00:35:27,720 --> 00:35:31,080 That's the end of the speech. Thank you, Bridget. 659 00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:41,200 You see? You saying that you didn't have the speech skills 660 00:35:41,240 --> 00:35:43,400 of Malcolm X was folly 661 00:35:43,440 --> 00:35:47,080 because that speech would drop into some of the all-time classics. 662 00:35:47,120 --> 00:35:48,920 Ich bin ein Berliner, 663 00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:50,440 oik. 664 00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:54,360 I think, if you actually break it down - 665 00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:56,640 "Treat others carelessly, oik" - 666 00:35:56,680 --> 00:35:59,360 I think she's referring to you as "oik". 667 00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:02,440 I think it's an insult. I think it's an insult. 668 00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:09,160 She definitely doesn't think you're God because she thinks wind is God. Wind is God. 669 00:36:09,200 --> 00:36:11,600 You think I haven't got wind? 670 00:36:11,640 --> 00:36:14,520 I could go off like a tugboat right now! 671 00:36:14,560 --> 00:36:18,160 But she hasn't necessarily finished because she does end intriguingly with "Wait" 672 00:36:18,200 --> 00:36:20,760 and then we don't find out what... what happens next. 673 00:36:20,800 --> 00:36:24,560 Wait. Everyone, slow down, we're all in such a rush. 674 00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:27,000 You know? Wait. Think about things. 675 00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:30,760 Right, oik, it's break time. Time for you to take your bins out 676 00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:32,800 and resentfully stare at your partner 677 00:36:32,840 --> 00:36:35,400 while they just sit there, again. Your mum was right about them, 678 00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:37,560 wasn't she?! See you in a bit! 679 00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:49,080 Hello! You join us for the final part of tonight's show 680 00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:51,120 where we still have a task to finish off. 681 00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:54,320 Before the break, the comedians were writing the most stirring speeches 682 00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:57,240 for the Taskmaster using the letters provided on the bunting. 683 00:36:57,280 --> 00:37:00,040 Next up, it's Judi Love! 684 00:37:04,120 --> 00:37:05,640 A, 685 00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:09,280 hi, Taskmaster, 686 00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:12,520 I don't like you looking happy. 687 00:37:13,800 --> 00:37:15,960 Rass man. 688 00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:18,560 I dare, 689 00:37:18,600 --> 00:37:20,360 don't vex me. 690 00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:21,760 End. 691 00:37:23,480 --> 00:37:25,440 Wow. 692 00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:31,080 Are you calling me a rass man? Well, you know, 693 00:37:31,120 --> 00:37:33,400 I added a little culture in there, 694 00:37:33,440 --> 00:37:37,000 Jamaican culture, and called you a rass... Could you interpret "Rass man" for me? 695 00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:39,360 A rass is like... 696 00:37:39,400 --> 00:37:41,360 ..an arse. 697 00:37:41,400 --> 00:37:45,160 And you warned me not to vex you. 698 00:37:45,200 --> 00:37:48,040 Not to vex you... Well, maybe I'll vex you plenty, my friend. 699 00:37:51,280 --> 00:37:53,640 So shall we see Ardal's rubbish one? 700 00:37:53,680 --> 00:37:56,080 Yes... 701 00:37:56,120 --> 00:37:58,160 Any last words, Ardal, before we see it? 702 00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:00,200 Uh, no, I think all my words... 703 00:38:00,240 --> 00:38:02,920 All the words I know I think I used. 704 00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:09,080 OK. Finally, here he is. It's Ardal O'Ardal. Here we go. 705 00:38:11,160 --> 00:38:13,680 I am seven 706 00:38:13,720 --> 00:38:15,840 types of rank 707 00:38:15,880 --> 00:38:17,480 tit. 708 00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,640 U R swel, man. 709 00:38:20,680 --> 00:38:23,680 Hail TM! 710 00:38:30,280 --> 00:38:33,960 Obviously I was drunk with ego with "Hail TM." 711 00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:36,640 Erm, but you're doing yourself down a little bit 712 00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:39,280 with, erm, "rank tit". Seven types. Seven types. 713 00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:42,560 "Seven types of rank tit." They were the only letters available to me. 714 00:38:44,120 --> 00:38:48,280 That's definitely not true. You used the fewest letters by quite some margin. 715 00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:51,080 Some of them were damaged. 716 00:38:53,080 --> 00:38:55,960 Well, Ardal's was the shortest - 36 characters - 717 00:38:56,000 --> 00:38:59,240 then Bridget 39, Sophie 51, Chris 57. 718 00:38:59,280 --> 00:39:01,640 Judi's was the longest at 61 characters. 719 00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:04,080 It's impressive stuff. Are we deeming them all... 720 00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:06,800 Go on, let's say there's an element of stir in all of them. 721 00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:08,936 Well, in that case, it's one to Ardal, two to Bridget, 722 00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:11,480 three to Sophie, four to Chris, but five to Judi Love! 723 00:39:11,520 --> 00:39:12,800 Oh! 724 00:39:15,440 --> 00:39:19,360 There is one other thing. Everyone struggled a little bit with the letters provided. 725 00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:21,280 People questioned the lack of Bs. 726 00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:23,320 Er, these were obviously the letters here. 727 00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:26,840 Nobody worked out why those letters were provided. 728 00:39:26,880 --> 00:39:29,160 Any thoughts, Greg? The red flags? 729 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,760 Exactly, if they looked at the red flags, you see it says, 730 00:39:31,800 --> 00:39:33,840 "Look under the desk!" 731 00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:39,960 Hello! Welcome at last to Taskmaster. 732 00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:42,880 I'm Greg Davies and I am the Taskmaster. 733 00:39:42,920 --> 00:39:45,760 I'm powerful and in peak physical condition. 734 00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:51,280 That is of course the most stirring speech in all Taskmaster history 735 00:39:51,320 --> 00:39:53,560 and we did provide all the letters for that 736 00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:56,080 and an extra K because we got it slightly wrong. 737 00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:05,640 Incredible that we would get something wrong. 738 00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:07,800 Right, one more look at the scores, I think. 739 00:40:07,840 --> 00:40:11,200 All right. We have Sophie and Ardal in joint third on 13, 740 00:40:11,240 --> 00:40:13,720 Judi on 14, Chris in the lead with 16 points! 741 00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:20,000 Right. Please vacate the area 742 00:40:20,040 --> 00:40:24,800 and head to the stage for the final task of the show! 743 00:40:33,440 --> 00:40:37,640 Wow. That's the slimmest I've ever looked in my life. 744 00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:41,360 Who will read the task out, little Alex Horne? 745 00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:43,800 Ardal O'Hanlon will read the task out. 746 00:40:43,840 --> 00:40:46,200 Please, Ardal. OK. "Taking it in turns, 747 00:40:46,240 --> 00:40:48,480 "roll a tyre down the nappet." 748 00:40:48,520 --> 00:40:50,600 "You must roll from on the stage." 749 00:40:50,640 --> 00:40:53,240 "If your tyre does not pass the line, 750 00:40:53,280 --> 00:40:55,520 "you may not roll any further tyres." 751 00:40:55,560 --> 00:40:58,720 "If both your dolls topple, you may not roll any further tyres..." 752 00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:01,320 So you're trying to avoid toppling your own doll. Exactly. 753 00:41:01,360 --> 00:41:04,480 OK. "Last doll standing wins." 754 00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:09,040 So your tactics are to try to knock everyone else's dolls over, 755 00:41:09,080 --> 00:41:12,400 but not yours. OK. As soon as both your dolls are toppled, you're out. 756 00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:15,640 You'll be going one at a time from last place to first place. 757 00:41:15,680 --> 00:41:18,040 There's a chance some people won't get to roll at all. 758 00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:20,720 And I would like to point out every time your roll your tyre, 759 00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:22,760 it must cross the red line. 760 00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:25,280 So first of all, Bridget will roll. 761 00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:27,600 Wow. 762 00:41:27,640 --> 00:41:29,600 Let's roll. Right. Exactly. 763 00:41:29,640 --> 00:41:31,800 Let's roll. So good luck, Bridget, 764 00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:34,480 you're trying to avoid yourself. Yes. 765 00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:39,160 It's a great roll. 766 00:41:39,200 --> 00:41:41,720 Aww! That's OK. That's OK. 767 00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:50,400 Next to roll, Ardal O'Hanlon. 768 00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:52,600 Left-handed, is it? 769 00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:58,920 Ooh! Ohh! 770 00:42:10,280 --> 00:42:12,480 Chris Ramsey is out! 771 00:42:12,520 --> 00:42:15,240 We've lost Chris Ramsey. He will not get to roll. 772 00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:17,680 I guess that's just the way the tyre rolls. 773 00:42:17,720 --> 00:42:19,480 Who's next? 774 00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:21,840 Sophie Duker is next. 775 00:42:25,440 --> 00:42:27,680 Sister queen, don't do it! 776 00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:42,720 Ooh. Ohh... It went past the line. 777 00:42:42,760 --> 00:42:45,800 It did go past the line. Next to roll, Judi Love. 778 00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:48,440 Let's see if the same loyalty applies! Sister queen... 779 00:43:01,400 --> 00:43:03,960 Get! Judi... No, Judi. 780 00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:06,960 No, Judi. No, Judi. No, Judi. 781 00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:08,880 Look at this shit! Look at this! 782 00:43:08,920 --> 00:43:11,120 My nail has fucking popped off! 783 00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:15,800 I deserve another point! 784 00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:19,760 Judi... Judi, there's good news and bad news. 785 00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:22,176 The good news is you are still in the game, you can still win, 786 00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:24,680 but you can't take part in the game. I mean, that was not fair. 787 00:43:24,720 --> 00:43:26,720 It was fair, you've still got a chance, 788 00:43:26,760 --> 00:43:30,200 but, I mean, what are the chances of people not targeting you now? 789 00:43:30,240 --> 00:43:33,880 OK, so we're back to the beginning. It's back to Bridget Christie again. 790 00:43:33,920 --> 00:43:36,000 Yes. Right. Been eventful, hasn't it? 791 00:43:36,040 --> 00:43:38,520 Only one person struck so far. Chris is out. 792 00:43:38,560 --> 00:43:41,840 Mind my nail, Bridget. My nail. 793 00:43:43,920 --> 00:43:45,680 Ah! Ahh! 794 00:43:52,400 --> 00:43:54,960 Three left in. Yes, we've lost Judi Love. 795 00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:58,320 Now, we know who's up next. It's the deadly Ardal O'Hanlon. 796 00:43:58,360 --> 00:44:00,120 It's tense. 797 00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:02,080 Ooh, who will I aim for? 798 00:44:02,120 --> 00:44:04,160 Ohh, no. 799 00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:05,640 Ooh. 800 00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:08,280 Ooh, straight in! 801 00:44:09,680 --> 00:44:11,800 Oh, my God. 802 00:44:11,840 --> 00:44:14,000 We've lost Sophie. 803 00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:16,120 It's the final. It's Bridget versus Ardal 804 00:44:16,160 --> 00:44:18,400 and it's Bridget to roll. Come on, Bridget. 805 00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:21,040 You can do it, Bridget. Go on, girl. 806 00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:26,280 Yes! 807 00:44:36,720 --> 00:44:40,080 Let's see how that's affected the final score. Come and join me! 808 00:44:47,320 --> 00:44:50,040 Pretty exciting stuff. Yes, yes. 809 00:44:50,080 --> 00:44:53,920 Three people in joint third, two people in joint first. 810 00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:57,360 What? Wow. And the scoreboard looks like this. 811 00:44:57,400 --> 00:45:01,520 So it's a tie between Ardal and Chris Ramsey! 812 00:45:01,560 --> 00:45:03,760 Ooh! 813 00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:06,880 How will we sort this awful mess out? 814 00:45:07,920 --> 00:45:10,120 With the only way known to man. 815 00:45:10,160 --> 00:45:12,280 With a beer-mat-flipping tiebreak! 816 00:45:12,320 --> 00:45:13,560 Ohh... 817 00:45:13,600 --> 00:45:16,480 All they had to do was turn over the most beer mats out of 91 818 00:45:16,520 --> 00:45:19,160 in 30 seconds. Simple. 819 00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:21,200 Here is how they got on. 820 00:45:21,240 --> 00:45:23,760 "Your time starts now." 821 00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:29,440 Quick as you can, Ardal. 822 00:45:29,480 --> 00:45:31,360 How's it going? Shut up. 823 00:45:31,400 --> 00:45:33,560 Five seconds. 824 00:45:37,520 --> 00:45:40,360 That was a quick 30 seconds, that. Thank you. 825 00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:50,680 So we only counted the beer mats that were still on the table after the task. 826 00:45:50,720 --> 00:45:52,120 Out of 91, 827 00:45:52,160 --> 00:45:55,200 Chris flipped 59 beers mats. 828 00:45:55,240 --> 00:45:57,160 Ardal - 829 00:45:57,200 --> 00:45:59,680 64. Nice one! 830 00:45:59,720 --> 00:46:02,920 Congratulations, Ardal O'Hanlon! 831 00:46:02,960 --> 00:46:05,000 Ardal O'Hanlon wins! 832 00:46:05,040 --> 00:46:09,280 Please go and collect those nice night-time knick-knacks! 833 00:46:11,440 --> 00:46:13,480 Very good. Really good. 834 00:46:13,520 --> 00:46:15,880 So what have we learned today? Well, we've learned 835 00:46:15,920 --> 00:46:18,200 if you're off on a stag or a hen do this weekend, 836 00:46:18,240 --> 00:46:20,240 you've got to look out for the twerking cat 837 00:46:20,280 --> 00:46:22,880 because you don't want it to spoil your game of milk-ball! 838 00:46:22,920 --> 00:46:25,720 Four out of ten complete. See you again soon. 839 00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:29,160 But for now, let's hear it for Ardal O'Hanlon!