This program is rated G
and is suitable for general audiences.
♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪
♪ Dodging girls like ping-pong balls ♪
♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪
♪ Leaping over laundry piles ♪
♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪
♪ Guy's gotta do what he can to survive ♪
♪ In the Loud House, in the Loud House ♪
♪ Duck, dodge, push and shove, it's how we show our love ♪
♪ In the Loud House, in the Loud House ♪
♪ One boy, 10 girls, wouldn't trade it for the world ♪
♪ Loud ♪
♪ House ♪
♪ Loud, Loud House ♪
Poo-poo!
Okay, no, I was backwards.
Okay, there!
This party map is coming along nicely.
Oops! The cotton candy machine can't be too close
to bounce house or it will be puke city.
I hope you're writing this down.
(Squeaking)
Mr. Sprinkles! Hello.
Focus.
Eunice would kill for this job.
(Squealing)
(Screaming)
Oh!
Bad, Duncan!
I'm sorry about Eunice.
I'll get her patched up for you.
By the way, this is Duncan.
I'm training him.
Duncan, sit.
(Chomping)
It's a work in progress.
So, you're planning our birthday party again, huh?
I was.
I kinda want to talk to you about that.
I was hoping I could plan the party this year.
(Laughing)
Oh, you're serious.
Listen, sweetie.
Party planning takes a certain je ne sais quoi.
I've got a ton of that!
(Belching)
Besides, I've always planned our birthday parties.
That's the point.
You plan our party every year.
Even before we were born.
(Party horn honking)
We always do your frou-frou party.
It's only fair that I get to plan this year's Lana style.
Yeah--
It's the last part that scares me.
Don't worry, sis.
The party is in great hands.
Oops! Sorry!
Not even sure what that is.
Time to plan the best birthday party ever!
Come on, Mr. Sprinkles.
We have to stop Lana from ruining the party.
But first, I'll need to take a three-hour shower.
Here we are!
Hazeltucky's finest party supply store.
Wait here.
I'll make sure they're open.
I see customers inside.
(Gasping) Those could be thieves!
Stay here where it's safe.
Midge! Lola!
How did the Parisian table runners go over
at your tea party?
Midge! I don't have time to talk about that.
Okay, they looked fabulous, but listen!
I have a party crisis on my hands.
I need you to hide everything poop coloured now!
No peeking yet!
(Panting) Okay.
Tah-dah!
Look, Lana!
So many things that are just perfect for our party, huh?
Ooh! How about this?
Tropical, fun, flirty!
Nah! Those don't really scream Lana to me.
Hmm.
Do you have a dumpster?
Oh!
Midge! How much for the half-eaten cheese?
It would make a great centrepiece.
Gosh. I don't know.
Can I get a price-check on the dumpster cheese?
WALKIE-TALKIE: Uh, free?
Cool! Yes!
Wow! Old batteries,
rotting fish heads.
These would make perfect party favours.
Don't panic, Lola.
This is only a minor setback.
The party can still be saved.
Okay! Before we go home,
let's talk entertainment.
I was thinking a princess story-time show,
a mermaid matinee,
a genie in a bottle!
Sorry, Lols!
I actually had something else in mind.
Shortcut!
(Screaming)
LANA: Wahoo-hoo-hoo!
All right. Everything looks to be in order.
Hang on tight or don't.
I'm charging for the test ride either way.
Let 'er rip, Flip!
You got it.
Let me give old Roy some spicy mustard.
That really gets him going.
(Squirting)
(Alarm ringing)
Whoa!
(Screaming)
We'll take him!
Ooh! How about this cake? Nah.
Ooh! How about this one?
Nah.
Ooh! Ooh!
This one! This one! Nah.
Okay--
Do you have a sink and some dirt?
Are you with the health department?
Nope. Then follow me.
(Flies buzzing)
We'll take it from here.
(Gasping)
Speechless, huh?
Well, I think that means we've found our cake.
Whoa!
What do you have for toppings?
Any worms or bugs we can sample?
I'm sure we can find something in the pantry.
Oh, those are just some exploding candles.
Wait! Be careful with those!
(Exploding)
(Screaming) (Splatting)
(Gasping)
I can't do this anymore.
Lana is ruining this party.
She actually thinks a pile of leaves
can be used as both a toilet
and toilet paper!
What am I going to do, Mr. Sprinkles?
You're right.
We're going to have to take more drastic measures.
Any ideas?
(Evil laughing)
Yes!
Time to makes some phone calls.
Lola Loud, you clever little minx.
(Honking) It's here! It's here!
I can't believe it's our seventh birthday!
Personally, I don't feel a day over six-and-a-half.
Listen. Thanks for letting me plan the party this year.
I know it wasn't easy to give it up,
but you were weirdly cool about it.
Well, you just made it so easy.
Meet you at Tall Timbers Park.
What, Duncan?
(Hissing)
It's party time.
LANA: Hey! Hey stop, guys!
Come back!
(Groaning) What's going on?
The garbage guys threw away my garbage decorations.
What?
But how could they not understand
the vision you were going for?
(Sighing)
It's okay.
At least the bull will be here soon.
(Phone ringing)
Hello?
Hey, muddy Loud kid, this is Flip.
I can't make it to the party.
I got four flapjacks and no spare.
(Bull mooing)
Oh, listen. I gotta go.
Roy found my pastrami sandwich and the thing
was oozing with spicy mustard.
(Screaming)
Aw!
I guess there's no bull either.
All of Flip's tires are flat.
You're kidding!
What are the chances?
Oh, look!
The guests are starting to arrive.
(Coughing)
Well, I'd better go welcome everyone.
I'll try to put on a happy face.
Hi!
(Phone ringing) Oh, man!
What now?
Hello?
Can't bring the cake today.
Someone tipped off the health inspector
about all the dirt and bugs at the bakery
and now I have to clean the whole place top to bottom.
(Sighing)
And then I said, "You call that lemon chiffon?
I do not think so."
(Laughing)
Lana, aren't you gonna join our party?
This party is officially ruined.
No bull, no cake,
no decorations.
I am so sorry.
Lola, you gotta help me out.
Is there anything you can do to save our birthday party?
I might be able to figure something out.
(Chattering)
Whoa.
I can't believe you were able
to pull this together so fast.
Well, it's not going to be as good as the awesome party
you had planned, but it will have to do.
Hey, Lola! I hope you don't mind!
I came back for some cake.
Wait. You know the garbage man who threw away my decorations?
Barely, I just--
Hey! Fancy Loud kid.
Watch where you leave this thing.
It popped my tires
which I will be charging you for.
Ooh! Parisian table runners.
Ah! (Crashing)
Lola! What was your tiara doing under Flip's tires?
What! That's not even my tiara!
Everybody is wearing them nowadays.
Save it! I can't believe you!
You've been lying this whole time!
The garbage truck, the cakes, the bull!
There haven't been any mix-ups at all.
You just wanted the party your way again.
It's not fair, Lola.
It was my turn!
I'm taking our present from Aunt Ruth.
Enjoy your party.
Come on, guys.
Let's ride.
RITA: Okay, girls! Time to blowout the candles.
Where's your sister?
I, I ruined her party and drove her away.
I gotta fix this.
Stall for me, okay?
And you said I wouldn't need this.
(Banging) (Groaning)
Midge! I need you to bring out all the poop colours.
(Grunting) Come on, Roy.
Move your big, bald butt!
(Grunting)
Well, at least there's rotten food in here.
Party favours!
(Knocking) LANA: No one's home.
Especially, if you're Lola.
Lana, open up.
I know this is your sad can.
Go away!
I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
I should've let you have your party.
It was your chance to shine.
You really did me dirty, Lols.
I know, but--
I have a big surprise that might make up
for all the terrible things I did.
We're listening.
Whoa!
Wow! You did all this?
I'm going to smell like a farm animal for a week.
But somethings are worth it.
Thank you, Lola,
for the best trashiest party ever!
You're welcome.
Now, let's blow out our candles.
Happy birthday, Lans.
Happy birthday, Lols.
(Blowing)
Got it! Wait! Wait!
One more for safety.
I can't believe you managed
to get the exploding candles too.
Wait. What?
(Exploding)
STELLA: Hey, guys! I think I found something
Follow me!
Quick! Up there.
LINCOLN: Make way! Coming through.
(Grunting)
Hmm.
Whoa!
(Crashing)
(Groaning)
It was pitch black. I couldn't see a thing.
I don't know fellers and stellers.
I think we're on a goose chase.
No way!
My cousin Derrick swore there was a secret game room
somewhere in this school.
But we've checked every hallway from here to the boiler room.
STELLA: Hey, guys! Over here!
Check this out.
(Grunting)
(Gasping)
Well, hash my browns.
I knew it!
This is where they experiment on kids.
No, Zach. This is clearly an old news studio.
The school must've had a show or something.
(Rumbling)
Check out the vintage news cuties.
Dude, gross!
That's my mom!
LINCOLN: Hey, guys! I just had a great idea.
We can be the next news team.
So fun!
And it would be a great way for us
to spend more time together at school.
Camera still works.
I'm Stella Zho and I say let's do this.
Wait!
Where's Rusty?
There's just something about those eyes of hers.
Dude! What?
You should take it as a compliment.
(Chattering)
♪
Maybe we were in her blind-spot.
Meryl!
Yoo-hoo, Meryl!
(Groaning)
Oh, she's watching that soap opera
Southern Hospitality.
Jackson just came back from the dead
only to find his long-lost fiancé
had fallen into a coma.
I try to stay current.
Oof! Can't a girl get some quiet around here?
Okay--
Now, what are y'all noisy little jitterbugs need?
But hurry. My show is back from commercial in 30 seconds.
Well, we found an old news set. It was pretty cool.
Rusty dented the camera when he dropped it.
Why would you tell her that?
We need to talk to Principal Ramirez.
It's urgent!
Well, I don't know.
She's with someone.
Ooh! It's back on!
Just go on in.
LINCOLN: And that's why we are absolutely perfect
to restart the news show.
Thank you.
Well, I appreciate your enthusiasm,
but there's a reason we ended that news show.
Nobody watched it.
The Daily Marsupial called it a punishment
worse than detention.
But our show could be different.
I have news experience.
And this face was made to be on TV.
(Sighing) I don't know.
Please give us a chance.
We already practiced our Action News Team pose.
(Crashing)
(Snickering)
Fine.
I'll give you a shot.
(Cheering)
We're going live in five, four,
three, two--
Good morning, Royal Woods Middle School.
I'm Lincoln Loud.
And I'm Clyde McBride.
BOTH: And kangaroos--
this is your news.
Breaking news!
Today is Mr. Bolhofner's birthday.
We've got reporter Stella Zho live on the scene.
That's right, Clyde.
I'm here with the birthday boy.
Mr. B, how does it feel to turn 62?
I'm 34! (Door slamming)
Now, Rusty Spokes with sports.
LIAM: Rusty! You're live!
I'm here with the soccer team's captain Lynn Loud.
Rusty, we're trying to practice here.
Lynn! Wait!
How are you feeling about today's game
against Hazeltucky?
More like Hazel-lucky if they score a goal
Don't move. I need to run a few drills.
That's today's sports news.
Lincoln and Clyde! Back to--
(Grunting)
BOTH: Oh!
Kicking it with Lynn Loud is definitely
not a goal of mine.
BOTH: (Laughing)
Let's check back in with Stella
who's learning how to whip up that famous cafeteria
one-bean chili.
I'm here with Chef Pat. (Grunting)
And together, we're cooking up some trouble.
Is that a shoe?
(Grunting)
Well, that's the news for today!
From all of us here at Action News,
have a hoppy day, kangaroos.
BOTH: (Laughing)
That's a wrap!
How did we do?
I think we--
nailed it!
(Cheering)
I can't wait to hear
what everyone thought about our first episode.
Everyone hated your first episode.
Sorry, I'm gonna have to cancel the show.
What? How's that possible?
Your Action News had no action and no news.
No one found it interesting except for Mr. Bolhofner
who is suing the school.
Well--
What if we can change that?
What if we can come up with a really great story
that will hook people?
All right.
I'll give you 24 hours.
Oh! Oh! I've got the story.
We investigate undercover aliens
posing as teachers at our school.
Still a no, Zach.
Okay, you'll be sorry when Mr. Guggenheimer
starts his invasion.
RUSTY: I'm back with the snacks.
But don't hate.
The vending machine and the cafeteria
are both sold out of popcorn again.
Which is weird, because it's supposed to be restocked
every morning.
That is weird.
Who could be snapping up all the popcorn
before anyone else can get to it?
Guys! This could be the story we need
to save our show!
All right!
(Truck backing)
There's the truck!
Liam! Start recording.
Let's go!
RUSTY: Make way!
(Crashing)
RUSTY: I got him!
And he smells terrible.
Good job, Rust.
You caught trash.
And the real culprit got away.
That's all right.
We still have some good footage.
Let's go show Principal Ramirez.
RAMIREZ: Now, this is a news story!
But who is the culprit?
Um, we don't know yet,
but we're really close.
Well, now I gotta see how this turns out.
I'll give you the rest of the week to crack it.
Yes! You can count on me!
Action News Team!
(Crashing) (Snickering)
Just get out.
(Truck backing)
There's the driver right on time.
(Screaming)
Zach! You've been there the whole time?
We thought you overslept.
It's called camouflage, Rusty.
Hey, y'all.
Where the heck is the popcorn culprit?
I guess he's a no-show.
At least we can still talk to the driver.
Action News Team!
Do you have anything to say about the popcorn situation?
(Screaming)
We saw you meet with someone yesterday.
Who have you been selling all the school's popcorn to?
What are you talking about?
Today is my first day.
The last guy got transferred to Indianapolis.
(Gasping)
Popcorn perp must've arranged it.
He must be onto us.
Wait! But why did you run from us?
You see a weird-looking bush coming at you,
your instincts tell you to run.
Well, what do we do now?
We need to find a way to lure the culprit out of hiding.
I've got a plan!
Zach, we're gonna need you tracker
and Clyde's spice kit.
CLYDE: If the culprit likes popcorn,
there's no way he'll be able to resist
Clyde's famous rosemary parmcorn.
(Laughing)
Okay, guys!
We'll take turns watching the tracker.
Settle in.
This could be a while.
(Gasping) Popcorn on the move!
It's showtime.
(Tracker beeping)
(Gasping) Come on! Let's go!
We're heading to the wharf.
(Tracker beeping)
He's making a break for Canada!
RUSTY: Oh, no! He's not!
Liam! You're gonna want to film this.
Time to shine!
(Ferry horn blowing)
(Screaming)
(Splashing)
Don't worry, Rust. I got it!
(School bell ringing)
Well, without a story,
I guess this is the end of the road
for the Action News Team.
Hmm.
Guys, look!
It's a ferry ticket and it's timestamped
from last night.
The culprit must be in the building.
Let's go find him!
The Action News Team is back in business.
Right. We can do the pose later.
Look, y'all!
A popcorn kernel
and there's a whole trail of them.
Good grits!
And I thought Meemaw was a messy eater.
The door's locked!
RUSTY: Step aside!
Liam! You're gonna want to film this.
(Crashing) Oof!
Don't worry, Rust! I got it.
(Unlocking)
Bingo!
Okay, this is it.
Let's do this.
Action News Team! We're coming in!
Meryl?
You're the one who's been taking all the school's popcorn?
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I just wanted a quiet place to watch my soaps
and nothing soundproofs like popcorn.
Oh, please don't air this, kids.
I could lose my job!
We would never do that, Meryl.
Even if it means we don't have a story,
which means we don't have a show.
Oh, y'all are the sweetest.
Wait! I know another big story
that'll save your show.
For years, it's been a legend,
but no one's been able to find it--
until now!
Thanks to an anonymous tip,
the Action News Team has uncovered
the school's secret game room.
Whoa!
Well, that's our report for today.
We've got some games to play!
(Rumbling)
Bravo!
I've been looking for this room for years.
Great work, team.
You can keep your show.
(Cheering)
Now, Meryl--
you up for a round of air hockey?
You bet your biscuits!
(Laughing)
Oh, and Zach--
I owe you a new tracker.
It's all good.
(Laughing)
Guys! I just got a new lead on another story!
Rumour has it--
there's a hot tub in the teachers' lounge.
The Action News Team is on the case.
(Crashing)
♪ May sound bad but ain't the case ♪
♪ In the Loud House, Loud House ♪
♪ Duck and dodge and push and shove ♪
♪ That's the way we show our love ♪
♪ In the Loud House, Loud House ♪
♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪
♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪
♪ Stand in line to take a pee ♪
♪ Never any privacy ♪
♪ Chaos with 11 kids ♪
♪ That's the way it always is ♪
♪ In the Loud House ♪