1
00:00:13,497 --> 00:00:17,401
You were gettin' caught up
with your pals the other day...

2
00:00:17,434 --> 00:00:20,137
DARYL: Have yous ever
heard of sober October?

3
00:00:20,170 --> 00:00:22,539
That's an emo band
from Hamilton?

4
00:00:22,572 --> 00:00:25,509
No, it's just like being sober
for the whole month of October.

5
00:00:25,542 --> 00:00:27,812
Oh, one month off booze ain't
gonna cleans out your livers.

6
00:00:27,845 --> 00:00:29,714
Might help you a wee bit
on the scale, though.

7
00:00:29,747 --> 00:00:30,815
Everything in moderation.

8
00:00:33,283 --> 00:00:34,384
You ever heard of

9
00:00:34,418 --> 00:00:36,520
‐no nut November?
‐What's that?

10
00:00:36,553 --> 00:00:40,324
Oh, I bet it's got something to
do with not nuttin' in November.

11
00:00:40,357 --> 00:00:43,493
Regular ejaculations decreases
your risks of prostate cancer.

12
00:00:43,527 --> 00:00:45,162
Oh, no, fuck.
Now we're havin' fun.

13
00:00:45,195 --> 00:00:46,296
It's good cardio though.

14
00:00:46,330 --> 00:00:47,698
Somethin' you tryna
say to me, Dary?

15
00:00:48,899 --> 00:00:50,935
But I was reading
about this thing called

16
00:00:50,968 --> 00:00:52,903
beat your dick December.

17
00:00:52,937 --> 00:00:55,239
Beat your dick December?
What's the rumpus grumpus?

18
00:00:56,406 --> 00:00:58,342
Well, you look at the calendar,

19
00:00:58,375 --> 00:01:01,211
and if it's like the first,
second or the third,

20
00:01:01,245 --> 00:01:03,447
that's how many times per day
you need to mix a batch.

21
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:05,950
So, on the 20th of December, you
got to mix 20 separate batches?

22
00:01:05,983 --> 00:01:07,251
You got'er pontiac.

23
00:01:07,284 --> 00:01:08,653
There's 30 days hath September,

24
00:01:08,686 --> 00:01:10,755
June and November.
All rest, 31, so...

25
00:01:10,788 --> 00:01:13,758
So, on the 31st,
you'd have to batch 31 times?

26
00:01:13,791 --> 00:01:15,192
You heard it here first.

27
00:01:15,225 --> 00:01:16,426
How's he gonna fuck that pig?

28
00:01:16,460 --> 00:01:17,494
Well...

29
00:01:18,829 --> 00:01:21,531
From the 1st to the 5th,
you're having a good time.

30
00:01:21,565 --> 00:01:23,934
And even up until the 10th.

31
00:01:23,968 --> 00:01:26,804
The 12th, you're
starting to fade.

32
00:01:26,837 --> 00:01:28,873
And by the 15th, you're
definitely not full bars.

33
00:01:28,906 --> 00:01:31,275
Oh, I don't think I could
continue past the 15th.

34
00:01:31,308 --> 00:01:32,342
Yeah, me neither.

35
00:01:35,512 --> 00:01:36,513
Wayne?

36
00:01:38,916 --> 00:01:40,951
Yeah.

37
00:01:40,985 --> 00:01:42,953
You're saying you could
batch 15 times on the 15th

38
00:01:42,987 --> 00:01:45,322
despite the fact that you
batched 14 times the day before,

39
00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:46,691
13 times the day before that

40
00:01:46,724 --> 00:01:48,558
and so on and so forth
back to one?

41
00:01:52,462 --> 00:01:53,463
Yeah.

42
00:01:55,733 --> 00:01:57,668
Could, could you do 20?

43
00:02:07,978 --> 00:02:10,014
‐Yeah.
‐Stay hydrated.

44
00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:12,482
What say we pick up
the conversation on the 25th?

45
00:02:12,516 --> 00:02:14,318
Oh, yeah, the 25th.
Christmas Day.

46
00:02:14,351 --> 00:02:16,420
That presents some obstacles,
what with family obligations

47
00:02:16,453 --> 00:02:19,389
‐or what not. You need a plan.
‐What's the plan, Dan?

48
00:02:19,423 --> 00:02:20,390
Please explain, Wayne.

49
00:02:20,424 --> 00:02:23,728
Well this, like everything,
starts with diet.

50
00:02:23,761 --> 00:02:24,929
What's on the menu?

51
00:02:24,962 --> 00:02:27,598
Oh, you'd want foods that boost
your testosterone, likely.

52
00:02:27,632 --> 00:02:28,999
Judging by biceps over there,

53
00:02:29,033 --> 00:02:30,835
I think that's already
on the menu, likely.

54
00:02:30,868 --> 00:02:33,503
Oatmeal, tuna, red meat,

55
00:02:34,338 --> 00:02:35,572
and poultry.

56
00:02:35,606 --> 00:02:36,807
Remember when I said
stay hydrated?

57
00:02:36,841 --> 00:02:38,943
A person should
always stay hydrated, Dary.

58
00:02:38,976 --> 00:02:40,510
How would you maneuver
around your family?

59
00:02:41,411 --> 00:02:42,713
Yeah. Nieces and nephews.

60
00:02:42,747 --> 00:02:43,781
You wouldn't.

61
00:02:45,983 --> 00:02:48,686
I really think
you should, Wayne.

62
00:02:48,719 --> 00:02:49,920
You're goin' away for Christmas.

63
00:02:50,254 --> 00:02:52,022
No, uh,

64
00:02:52,056 --> 00:02:54,524
Destination Christmas?
There has to be an alternative.

65
00:02:54,558 --> 00:02:56,560
‐There's no alternative.
‐What about presents?

66
00:02:56,594 --> 00:02:58,328
Real men finish what
they started, Dary.

67
00:02:59,730 --> 00:03:00,898
‐He's right.
‐So, now, the critical

68
00:03:00,931 --> 00:03:02,833
component in all this, I think,

69
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:04,534
is sleep.

70
00:03:04,568 --> 00:03:05,770
I hadn't even thought of that.

71
00:03:05,803 --> 00:03:09,907
Well, you've hammered on it
25 times in 24 calendar hours.

72
00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:11,575
And, the day before,
you've hammered on it

73
00:03:11,609 --> 00:03:13,410
24 times in 24 calendar hours.

74
00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:15,079
And so on and so forth.
Back to one.

75
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:16,580
Yeah, you'd need
a good night's sleep.

76
00:03:16,614 --> 00:03:18,048
Oh, some nappin'
in there for sure.

77
00:03:18,082 --> 00:03:19,884
Yeah, you'd be pretty
worn out from all that

78
00:03:19,917 --> 00:03:21,586
Christmas Eve hustle and bustle.

79
00:03:21,619 --> 00:03:23,988
So, I would suggest
getting us all 12 hours of sleep

80
00:03:24,021 --> 00:03:25,890
to rest and replenish,
then wake up,

81
00:03:25,923 --> 00:03:26,857
hammer on it twice an hour

82
00:03:26,891 --> 00:03:28,693
for the next 12 hours
to meet your quota.

83
00:03:28,726 --> 00:03:30,027
Twenty‐four times
in 12 hours is still 1 shy

84
00:03:30,060 --> 00:03:31,929
of your Christmas Day quota?

85
00:03:31,962 --> 00:03:33,030
I know.

86
00:03:33,063 --> 00:03:35,565
So, when'r you gonna squeeze
out your 25th squeezers?

87
00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:37,301
‐Dealer's choice really.
‐No.

88
00:03:38,803 --> 00:03:40,570
No.

89
00:03:40,605 --> 00:03:43,373
Not a single 12 hour effort.

90
00:03:43,407 --> 00:03:45,509
It's too many variables
in a window that small.

91
00:03:45,542 --> 00:03:46,443
Too much uncertainty.

92
00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:48,378
You're saying you'd use
the full 24 hours?

93
00:03:48,412 --> 00:03:49,780
Yeah.

94
00:03:49,814 --> 00:03:51,882
Yeah, we're on
military time now.

95
00:03:51,916 --> 00:03:53,618
‐When do you start?
‐Zero dark.

96
00:03:53,651 --> 00:03:54,785
But that's when Santa comes.

97
00:03:55,119 --> 00:03:56,320
And then?

98
00:03:57,788 --> 00:03:58,923
Zero dark thirty.

99
00:03:58,956 --> 00:03:59,990
So, you'd hammer out
the first two

100
00:04:00,024 --> 00:04:01,058
in the first hour you're awakes?

101
00:04:01,091 --> 00:04:02,627
‐Can confirm.
‐And then what?

102
00:04:02,660 --> 00:04:04,561
Once an hour for the
remaining 23 hours?

103
00:04:04,595 --> 00:04:06,563
‐You bet.
‐Holds water.

104
00:04:06,597 --> 00:04:08,032
‐Stay hydrated.
‐All that you wanna do

105
00:04:08,065 --> 00:04:09,533
is you wanna set your alarm
to wake you up

106
00:04:09,566 --> 00:04:10,968
every hour on the hour.

107
00:04:11,001 --> 00:04:14,471
And the program is, you wake up,
hammer on it, sleep,

108
00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:18,408
wake up, then you'd hammer
on it, then you'd sleep.

109
00:04:18,442 --> 00:04:19,910
And so on and so forth?

110
00:04:19,944 --> 00:04:21,445
Well, some snackin'
in there for sure.

111
00:04:21,478 --> 00:04:22,780
Yeah, handful of trail mix.

112
00:04:22,813 --> 00:04:24,014
You've hammered out
your first two

113
00:04:24,048 --> 00:04:26,016
at zero dark
and zero dark thirty.

114
00:04:26,050 --> 00:04:27,652
Could even back to back
those fellas if you're

115
00:04:27,685 --> 00:04:30,120
feeling good out of the gate.
Then, it's sheets.

116
00:04:30,154 --> 00:04:32,590
0100 hours, just up the road.

117
00:04:32,623 --> 00:04:34,091
And stay hydrated, of course.

118
00:04:34,124 --> 00:04:36,526
That's some snackin' in there
for sure. Need some snacks.

119
00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:37,728
You'd think you'd
wanna do it standing up

120
00:04:37,762 --> 00:04:38,896
so your muscles don't atrophy.

121
00:04:38,929 --> 00:04:40,731
I think if anything,
they'd hypertrophy.

122
00:04:40,765 --> 00:04:42,733
‐I think so too.
‐Would you alternate hands?

123
00:04:42,767 --> 00:04:43,801
Oh, you'd have to.

124
00:04:43,834 --> 00:04:45,169
25 one‐arm squeezers

125
00:04:45,202 --> 00:04:47,772
sounds like a lot of unnecessary
strain on the heart.

126
00:04:47,805 --> 00:04:49,974
Yeah, you'd definitely need a
helping hand from the other guy.

127
00:04:50,007 --> 00:04:51,776
And you'd stick with
that program till the 31st?

128
00:04:51,809 --> 00:04:55,445
Yup. Wake up.
Hammer on it. Snack. Nap.

129
00:04:55,479 --> 00:04:59,717
Wake up. I'd need to
hammer on it. Snack and nap.

130
00:04:59,750 --> 00:05:01,886
‐And so on and so forth?
‐Rinse and repeat.

131
00:05:04,054 --> 00:05:06,090
Have you considered
performance enhancers?

132
00:05:06,123 --> 00:05:07,758
The fact you'd even present that

133
00:05:07,792 --> 00:05:09,193
says a lot about ya, good buddy.

134
00:05:09,226 --> 00:05:11,996
You could just as easily
call it antisocial December.

135
00:05:16,734 --> 00:05:17,735
‐Wayne?
‐Dary.

136
00:05:21,171 --> 00:05:22,406
Could you make it to 31?

137
00:05:24,241 --> 00:05:27,778
Oh, if I've executed Christmas,
for a total of...

138
00:05:27,812 --> 00:05:31,048
Ballpark 325 squeezers
in 1 fiscal month...

139
00:05:31,081 --> 00:05:32,082
You're a man on fire.

140
00:05:32,116 --> 00:05:34,184
It's like I'm indestructible
by both scientific

141
00:05:34,218 --> 00:05:35,786
and pop‐culture standards.

142
00:05:35,820 --> 00:05:36,854
Tank‐like momentum.

143
00:05:40,891 --> 00:05:41,892
So?

144
00:05:46,230 --> 00:05:46,864
Yeah.

145
00:05:48,999 --> 00:05:52,002
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

146
00:07:51,689 --> 00:07:52,890
Holy fuck.

147
00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:54,625
Look at this coming.

148
00:07:59,630 --> 00:08:02,332
Could you be any
fuckin' louder, bud?

149
00:08:02,366 --> 00:08:04,068
All singin', all dancin', bud.

150
00:08:04,101 --> 00:08:05,102
Jaker!

151
00:08:07,738 --> 00:08:09,273
Hey, put some fuckin'
clothes on, cousin.

152
00:08:09,306 --> 00:08:10,675
Not my forte, cousin.

153
00:08:12,109 --> 00:08:14,779
There's that good old,
warm Canadian welcome.

154
00:08:14,812 --> 00:08:16,714
Well, every other country
fuckin' hates ya

155
00:08:16,747 --> 00:08:18,582
so we may as well give you
some love, am I right?

156
00:08:20,084 --> 00:08:21,218
That's what family's for.

157
00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:22,419
Who called you, you old devil.

158
00:08:22,452 --> 00:08:25,355
Need not call the devil, cousin.
He'll come all on his own.

159
00:08:25,389 --> 00:08:27,191
Those Westboro Baptists
teach you that ones?

160
00:08:27,224 --> 00:08:28,258
Squirrelly.

161
00:08:29,326 --> 00:08:30,560
How'd you find your way up here

162
00:08:30,595 --> 00:08:33,130
when you can't even point out
the country on a map, big fella?

163
00:08:33,163 --> 00:08:35,032
Big fella? I guess that's fair.

164
00:08:35,065 --> 00:08:36,667
We still got
trans‐fats stateside

165
00:08:36,701 --> 00:08:38,636
but they banned 'em up here
so, what's your excuse?

166
00:08:38,669 --> 00:08:40,705
‐Maple syrups.
‐Huh.

167
00:08:40,738 --> 00:08:42,139
‐Well, get up, Dary.
‐Wasn't gonna.

168
00:08:42,172 --> 00:08:43,974
What, you scared I'll put you
in the sharpshooter again?

169
00:08:44,008 --> 00:08:45,676
That was the Boston Crab
last time.

170
00:08:45,710 --> 00:08:48,078
A Canadian correcting
an American on wrestling moves.

171
00:08:48,112 --> 00:08:49,179
What a time to be alive.

172
00:08:49,213 --> 00:08:50,414
Sharpshooter is a Canadian move,

173
00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:51,682
which I've since learned
how to reverse.

174
00:08:51,716 --> 00:08:54,318
Hey, you may farm cattle, Dary,
but you're all chickenshit.

175
00:08:56,120 --> 00:08:57,755
I'd have some balls
taking one of yours

176
00:08:57,788 --> 00:08:59,957
when Michigan's got
the cheapest beer stateside.

177
00:08:59,990 --> 00:09:02,326
What kind of watered down swill
did you bring us this time?

178
00:09:02,359 --> 00:09:05,162
Call this one sixteen bucks.

179
00:09:05,195 --> 00:09:08,232
And I call this one 15.95.

180
00:09:08,265 --> 00:09:10,000
That is absolute horse shit.

181
00:09:10,034 --> 00:09:11,201
Call someone who cares, Dan.

182
00:09:11,235 --> 00:09:12,336
But you better use my cell phone

183
00:09:12,369 --> 00:09:15,439
since yous pay three times
the price for that as well.

184
00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:17,007
How many months have you
been back from your first tour

185
00:09:17,041 --> 00:09:17,908
‐Jaker?
‐Two.

186
00:09:17,942 --> 00:09:19,710
Let me hear you count
that high, Dary.

187
00:09:19,744 --> 00:09:21,378
So, are you planning
on going back then?

188
00:09:21,411 --> 00:09:22,880
Fuck yeah. Get some.

189
00:09:22,913 --> 00:09:24,348
Well, yanks love their country,

190
00:09:24,381 --> 00:09:26,717
so, whatcha gonna
say about yanks?

191
00:09:26,751 --> 00:09:27,885
So, what brings you up north?

192
00:09:27,918 --> 00:09:30,755
Well, what do you do when
your cousint's down in a hole?

193
00:09:30,788 --> 00:09:33,123
You get right down
there with him.

194
00:09:33,157 --> 00:09:35,192
‐Sorry, chief.
‐You can't win em all, chief.

195
00:09:35,225 --> 00:09:37,261
Had your bachelor party
all planned out and everything.

196
00:09:37,294 --> 00:09:40,030
Well, I'm not usually one
for that sort of pageantry, so.

197
00:09:40,064 --> 00:09:41,198
But do you wanna know what?

198
00:09:41,231 --> 00:09:42,466
Well, it depends
if what's worth knowing.

199
00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:43,701
The big plan
for your bachelor party

200
00:09:43,734 --> 00:09:46,236
is also the same plan that's
gonna get you over the hump here

201
00:09:47,104 --> 00:09:49,273
‐Really?
‐Why are you so squirrelly?

202
00:09:49,306 --> 00:09:50,474
No.

203
00:09:50,507 --> 00:09:52,142
They oughtta stop
calling you squirrelly.

204
00:09:52,176 --> 00:09:53,778
I think I know
what's on deck here.

205
00:09:53,811 --> 00:09:55,780
Five bucks says you do,
shady Katy.

206
00:09:55,813 --> 00:09:57,414
Yous are goin' off Broadway.

207
00:09:57,447 --> 00:09:59,149
The ballet. The cabaret.

208
00:09:59,183 --> 00:10:00,851
The showroom. The S‐club.

209
00:10:00,885 --> 00:10:02,486
‐The juice bar.
‐The observatory.

210
00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:03,754
The night shift.

211
00:10:03,788 --> 00:10:05,322
Take a little trip to Euhornia.

212
00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:06,824
Investigate area 69.

213
00:10:06,857 --> 00:10:08,425
‐The dollar holler.
‐The snail tracker.

214
00:10:08,458 --> 00:10:09,994
What the fuck
are yous talking about?

215
00:10:10,027 --> 00:10:12,096
Merry titsmas, cousint.
We're going to the rippers.

216
00:10:12,129 --> 00:10:13,330
‐The what?
‐The peelers.

217
00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:14,799
‐Huh?
‐We're going to the strip club.

218
00:10:14,832 --> 00:10:15,833
Hooray!

219
00:10:15,866 --> 00:10:18,435
Now, I see why
you were so fucking squirrelly.

220
00:10:18,468 --> 00:10:21,371
We're gonna plunk you right
up front in the meat seats.

221
00:10:21,405 --> 00:10:22,439
Right up gyno‐row.

222
00:10:22,472 --> 00:10:23,507
We'll be so close,
you'll be able

223
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:24,909
‐to hear the ocean.
‐No.

224
00:10:24,942 --> 00:10:26,343
I'mma take that
nickname away from you

225
00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:28,145
if I don't start
seeing some squirrelly.

226
00:10:28,178 --> 00:10:29,046
There's no way
I can do that

227
00:10:29,079 --> 00:10:30,915
and looks Professor Tricia
in the eye.

228
00:10:30,948 --> 00:10:32,516
We've come too far as a species

229
00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:34,384
to take part in such
primitive behaviors.

230
00:10:35,252 --> 00:10:36,320
‐Hey, Dan.
‐Yeah.

231
00:10:36,353 --> 00:10:37,988
‐What's better than a lecture?
‐What?

232
00:10:38,022 --> 00:10:39,023
A leave.

233
00:10:40,224 --> 00:10:41,959
Okay.

234
00:10:41,992 --> 00:10:43,027
I'm gonna go eat your food.

235
00:10:44,328 --> 00:10:46,430
Well, I really do
appreciate it cousint,

236
00:10:46,463 --> 00:10:48,132
but I think I'll take a pass.

237
00:10:48,699 --> 00:10:49,600
Too late, good buddy.

238
00:10:49,634 --> 00:10:51,802
Your best pal got at me
to get this sorted

239
00:10:51,836 --> 00:10:52,970
eight fiscal weeks ago.

240
00:10:54,238 --> 00:10:56,106
‐Who me?
‐No.

241
00:10:56,140 --> 00:10:58,342
‐Then who?
‐Wayne, how are you now?

242
00:10:58,375 --> 00:10:59,910
‐McMurray, what?
‐That's right.

243
00:10:59,944 --> 00:11:00,978
‐How are you...
‐How are you now?

244
00:11:01,011 --> 00:11:02,112
‐Well, not bad.
‐How are you now?

245
00:11:02,146 --> 00:11:03,848
‐Fine, I said how are you now.
‐Fine, count to three.

246
00:11:03,881 --> 00:11:05,115
‐So, you know.
‐Stop talking.

247
00:11:05,149 --> 00:11:06,817
‐I know. Three.
‐One, two, three.

248
00:11:06,851 --> 00:11:08,318
‐And then, I stop talking.
‐That's when you fucking stop.

249
00:11:08,352 --> 00:11:11,321
‐Told him to stop talking.
‐Don't you start talking now.

250
00:11:11,355 --> 00:11:12,489
‐You're only making it worse.
‐(OVERLAPPING CHATTER)

251
00:11:12,522 --> 00:11:17,094
It's not gonna get any better
unless you stop talking.

252
00:11:26,536 --> 00:11:28,238
They've been here all night?

253
00:11:28,272 --> 00:11:30,007
They keep drinking,
I keep pouring.

254
00:11:31,976 --> 00:11:33,277
Yeah!

255
00:11:33,310 --> 00:11:35,145
But you can't
legally serve booze

256
00:11:35,179 --> 00:11:37,347
between the hours
of 2am and 11am.

257
00:11:37,381 --> 00:11:38,415
I don't give a shit.

258
00:11:46,290 --> 00:11:47,457
Oh!

259
00:11:49,293 --> 00:11:50,194
What's first, gents?

260
00:11:50,227 --> 00:11:53,063
Bench press? Leg press?
Military press?

261
00:11:53,097 --> 00:11:54,865
‐Press pause.
‐You're done working out.

262
00:11:54,899 --> 00:11:57,001
‐Why?
‐Need to be quick in a fight.

263
00:11:57,034 --> 00:11:59,169
It's like being a hockey player.
Bulk will only slow you down.

264
00:11:59,203 --> 00:12:01,005
Explosive speed. Agility.

265
00:12:01,038 --> 00:12:02,439
‐Excuse me?
‐What?

266
00:12:02,472 --> 00:12:04,341
Our job was to get him muscle.

267
00:12:04,374 --> 00:12:06,576
Your job is to teach him
how to use it.

268
00:12:06,611 --> 00:12:07,878
‐Sit down.
‐We will

269
00:12:07,912 --> 00:12:09,847
absolutely not sit down.

270
00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:11,982
‐Sit down.
‐As you wish.

271
00:12:12,016 --> 00:12:14,619
Why the precipitous
modification of course?

272
00:12:14,652 --> 00:12:16,286
I got jacked so I could fight.

273
00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:18,055
‐And win.
‐I'm packin'.

274
00:12:18,088 --> 00:12:19,423
I'll say.

275
00:12:19,456 --> 00:12:21,626
‐Mmm.
‐Mmm‐hmm.

276
00:12:21,659 --> 00:12:23,527
‐So, what's the problem?
‐You can't take a punch.

277
00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:25,095
‐Yes, I can.
‐No, you can't.

278
00:12:25,129 --> 00:12:26,430
Yes, I can.

279
00:12:26,463 --> 00:12:28,933
‐Roald.
‐Roald!

280
00:12:28,966 --> 00:12:30,234
‐Dude.
‐Good. Come.

281
00:12:31,602 --> 00:12:32,870
Sit.

282
00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:37,141
‐Roald?
‐Stewart.

283
00:12:38,208 --> 00:12:39,910
Roald's on our team
for this one.

284
00:12:39,944 --> 00:12:41,578
Can we be on Stewart's team?

285
00:12:41,612 --> 00:12:43,213
We'll be on Stewart's team.

286
00:12:43,247 --> 00:12:44,314
What are we even doing here?

287
00:12:46,416 --> 00:12:47,517
‐Cousint?
‐Cousint.

288
00:12:47,551 --> 00:12:51,288
All know, I generally pass
on this sort of pageantry.

289
00:12:51,321 --> 00:12:52,923
Give him a kick
in the bum, cousint.

290
00:12:52,957 --> 00:12:54,592
Suck it up, buttercup.

291
00:12:54,625 --> 00:12:55,626
I'm going to the outlet malls.

292
00:12:55,660 --> 00:12:58,128
I'll be back to pick yous up
in a couple hours.

293
00:12:58,162 --> 00:13:00,464
If you yanks have one thing
sorted, it's your shopping.

294
00:13:00,497 --> 00:13:01,565
Adios.

295
00:13:03,033 --> 00:13:04,635
Why'd we have to come
stateside for this?

296
00:13:04,669 --> 00:13:07,171
Everyone knows the best
rippers are stateside.

297
00:13:07,204 --> 00:13:09,073
Especially my buddy, Dierks.

298
00:13:09,106 --> 00:13:11,308
‐Dierks?
‐Yeah. Like Dierks Bentley.

299
00:13:11,341 --> 00:13:14,178
Dierks. That man is a legend.

300
00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:15,379
‐You know him?
‐Of course, I do.

301
00:13:15,412 --> 00:13:16,480
Who do you think
helped me orchestrate

302
00:13:16,513 --> 00:13:17,648
this for my best friend Wayne?

303
00:13:17,682 --> 00:13:19,316
‐And he's a legend?
‐Of course, he is.

304
00:13:19,349 --> 00:13:21,051
Why do you think they
call him ol' long dick Dierks?

305
00:13:21,085 --> 00:13:23,153
Dierks loves peelers
and the peelers love Dierks.

306
00:13:23,187 --> 00:13:25,155
‐Oh, is that what they do?
‐Course, they do.

307
00:13:25,189 --> 00:13:27,157
Why do you think they call
him ol' long dong Dierks?

308
00:13:27,191 --> 00:13:28,392
How many guesses do I get?

309
00:13:29,493 --> 00:13:30,360
Maybe yous should call me

310
00:13:30,394 --> 00:13:33,698
ol' long dick Dary
while we're in here.

311
00:13:33,731 --> 00:13:36,066
Better clear it with
ol' long dick Dierks first.

312
00:13:38,435 --> 00:13:39,604
Gentlemen.

313
00:13:41,105 --> 00:13:43,073
The ballet awaits.

314
00:14:27,384 --> 00:14:28,418
Dierks.

315
00:14:30,487 --> 00:14:31,756
Oh, hi, smooth cock,
how are you?

316
00:14:31,789 --> 00:14:33,658
Ol' long dick himself!

317
00:14:33,691 --> 00:14:36,060
Booboo kitty fuck. Who's Daryl?

318
00:14:36,460 --> 00:14:37,995
Him.

319
00:14:38,028 --> 00:14:40,064
Well, what's left of him anyway.

320
00:14:40,097 --> 00:14:42,132
Very cool. Very cool, very nice.

321
00:14:42,166 --> 00:14:44,168
‐And Wayne?
‐Right here.

322
00:14:44,201 --> 00:14:46,536
Yup. This is Wayne.

323
00:14:46,570 --> 00:14:48,138
My best friend, Wayne.

324
00:14:48,172 --> 00:14:49,573
Heard a lot about you, hot beef.

325
00:14:49,607 --> 00:14:51,642
‐K.
‐Look at you. Very stiff.

326
00:14:51,676 --> 00:14:54,311
Very phallic, very phallic,
Very fresh.

327
00:14:54,344 --> 00:14:56,013
Some quick math. One, two.

328
00:14:56,814 --> 00:14:58,082
Three, four.

329
00:15:00,818 --> 00:15:02,519
My treat. Ladies, please.

330
00:15:04,121 --> 00:15:05,189
Easy now, Dierksy.

331
00:15:06,691 --> 00:15:08,525
‐Thank you.
‐Thank you.

332
00:15:10,060 --> 00:15:11,095
But no thank you.

333
00:15:11,829 --> 00:15:13,063
Respectfully.

334
00:15:13,097 --> 00:15:15,299
Very respectful.
Very respectful.

335
00:15:15,332 --> 00:15:17,802
Very smooth. But it's okay,
big dad. They love it.

336
00:15:17,835 --> 00:15:20,605
No thank you. Respectfully.

337
00:15:20,638 --> 00:15:22,372
Very certain. Very certain.

338
00:15:22,406 --> 00:15:24,574
Very stoic. Your call,
sweet and sexy.

339
00:15:24,609 --> 00:15:26,510
Let's have a drink, cousint.

340
00:15:28,412 --> 00:15:30,314
‐Baby steps.
‐Your terms are acceptable.

341
00:15:31,481 --> 00:15:32,617
Thank you very much, ladies.

342
00:15:32,650 --> 00:15:33,684
It's not you.

343
00:15:33,984 --> 00:15:35,385
Cheers.

344
00:15:35,419 --> 00:15:36,520
To very hot guys.

345
00:15:41,091 --> 00:15:42,793
Not your type?
Very fair, cute guy.

346
00:15:42,827 --> 00:15:44,328
Very fair, very focused.

347
00:15:44,361 --> 00:15:45,796
Not my type either.
I like a tomboy.

348
00:15:45,830 --> 00:15:50,167
Tomboys are decisive.
Very decisive, very deserving.

349
00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:51,501
Very disciplined.
You like a tomboy?

350
00:15:53,203 --> 00:15:54,639
I'm hammered.

351
00:15:54,672 --> 00:15:57,074
Would you look at
that one over there?

352
00:15:57,675 --> 00:15:59,576
She is something tiny.

353
00:15:59,610 --> 00:16:01,211
Yeah, you should
maybe have an eye.

354
00:16:01,245 --> 00:16:03,147
When McMurray gets hammered,
he starts saying stuff...

355
00:16:03,180 --> 00:16:05,683
She's so tiny, you could
just pick her up,

356
00:16:05,716 --> 00:16:09,419
put her on top of you and then
just jerk yourself of with her.

357
00:16:09,453 --> 00:16:10,588
I'd have a piss.

358
00:16:15,860 --> 00:16:17,561
Hey.

359
00:16:17,595 --> 00:16:21,832
‐Hey.
‐Oh, Bonnie McMurray!

360
00:16:21,866 --> 00:16:23,533
Yous are going hard.

361
00:16:23,567 --> 00:16:25,369
We owe it to Ovi.

362
00:16:25,402 --> 00:16:27,471
Ovi raised the bar
for Cup celly's.

363
00:16:27,504 --> 00:16:30,808
Ovi! Ovi! Ovi! Ovi!

364
00:16:30,841 --> 00:16:34,378
Hey. Hey. You've been
playing this song all day.

365
00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:35,379
Let's switch it up.

366
00:16:35,412 --> 00:16:37,648
First guy in the room
picks the music, sniper.

367
00:16:37,682 --> 00:16:39,583
Seniority rules, sniper.

368
00:16:39,617 --> 00:16:42,486
Jock Jams for days.

369
00:16:42,519 --> 00:16:45,455
Ovi! Ovi! Ovi!

370
00:16:45,489 --> 00:16:48,525
‐Ovi!
‐Yeah. Okay. Jams.

371
00:16:48,558 --> 00:16:49,794
You're only playing one.

372
00:16:51,395 --> 00:16:54,198
We're number one!
We're number one!

373
00:16:54,231 --> 00:16:55,733
‐Okay, okay.
‐We're number one!

374
00:16:55,766 --> 00:16:58,402
We're number one!
We're number one!

375
00:16:58,435 --> 00:17:01,639
Hey. Everyone in here
is getting chapped ass.

376
00:17:01,672 --> 00:17:03,307
How many cups have they won?

377
00:17:03,340 --> 00:17:05,810
Talk to me when
you've won a Cupski!

378
00:17:08,512 --> 00:17:11,782
We're number one!
We're number one!

379
00:17:11,816 --> 00:17:16,286
We're number one!
We're number one!

380
00:17:19,657 --> 00:17:20,925
‐How are you now?
‐Good and you?

381
00:17:20,958 --> 00:17:22,359
‐Not so bad.
‐What are you doing?

382
00:17:23,260 --> 00:17:24,795
Oh, I'd rather not say.

383
00:17:24,829 --> 00:17:27,264
But I'm doing it haphazardly.

384
00:17:27,297 --> 00:17:28,699
Haphazardly's a funny word.

385
00:17:28,733 --> 00:17:29,800
Do you wanna know
what else is a funny word?

386
00:17:29,834 --> 00:17:31,335
‐What?
‐Tiramisu.

387
00:17:31,368 --> 00:17:32,269
You in a mood to run the dogs?

388
00:17:32,302 --> 00:17:33,938
Oh, I'm always in
a mood to run the dogs.

389
00:17:33,971 --> 00:17:37,341
‐Pitter patter.
‐I can't though. Currently.

390
00:17:37,374 --> 00:17:39,677
‐Rain check?
‐I should say.

391
00:17:39,710 --> 00:17:41,779
I got a Monopoly board
and all the properties

392
00:17:41,812 --> 00:17:43,313
are places from Letterkenny.

393
00:17:43,347 --> 00:17:45,349
‐Oh yeah, which one's Boardwalk?
‐MoDean's.

394
00:17:45,382 --> 00:17:46,917
MoDean's one, two or three?

395
00:17:46,951 --> 00:17:48,686
You'll have to
come by to find out.

396
00:17:49,386 --> 00:17:51,488
‐Soon?
‐Sooner than later.

397
00:17:51,521 --> 00:17:52,623
Bring Stormy.

398
00:17:52,657 --> 00:17:54,692
If you don't I'll point you
back where you came from.

399
00:17:54,725 --> 00:17:56,393
‐Good enough.
‐Talk to ya.

400
00:17:56,426 --> 00:17:57,494
Yup we'll talk to ya.

401
00:17:59,329 --> 00:18:01,732
‐Hola.
‐Hola.

402
00:18:01,766 --> 00:18:03,601
‐Where are yous from?
‐Vene‐thwela.

403
00:18:03,634 --> 00:18:05,202
‐And you?
‐Vene‐fwela.

404
00:18:05,235 --> 00:18:06,637
‐And you?
‐Vene‐huela.

405
00:18:06,671 --> 00:18:09,239
Is that right?
Say one more time.

406
00:18:09,273 --> 00:18:10,540
‐Vene‐thwela.
‐Okay.

407
00:18:10,574 --> 00:18:11,809
‐Vene‐fwela.
‐Okay.

408
00:18:11,842 --> 00:18:13,577
‐Vene‐huela.
‐Oh, fuck, there you go.

409
00:18:15,746 --> 00:18:17,547
The line to the ladies
was too long.

410
00:18:17,581 --> 00:18:19,917
‐Okay.
‐You're ol' long dick's buddy

411
00:18:19,950 --> 00:18:21,185
I'm his acquaintance.

412
00:18:21,218 --> 00:18:24,288
We had your bachelor party all
lined up a couple months back.

413
00:18:24,321 --> 00:18:25,656
Dierks canceled last minute.

414
00:18:25,690 --> 00:18:27,858
‐Way she goes.
‐Well, no ring, I see.

415
00:18:27,892 --> 00:18:30,560
‐Can't win 'em all.
‐I'll do the math.

416
00:18:30,595 --> 00:18:32,496
Everyone's always
fuckin' someone else.

417
00:18:33,831 --> 00:18:35,900
Well, not everyone.

418
00:18:35,933 --> 00:18:37,902
Got any reason
to believe otherwise?

419
00:18:37,935 --> 00:18:39,670
You're a good old boy then.

420
00:18:39,704 --> 00:18:41,739
Dying breed.

421
00:18:41,772 --> 00:18:44,875
Get real. Everybody's always
fuckin' someone else.

422
00:18:47,411 --> 00:18:48,713
Getting back out there?

423
00:18:48,746 --> 00:18:50,214
Oh, I don't think I...

424
00:18:53,818 --> 00:18:55,519
Have any other option.

425
00:18:56,821 --> 00:18:57,922
Excuse me.

426
00:18:59,724 --> 00:19:01,826
Alejandro. Alijandro.
Allesandro.

427
00:19:01,859 --> 00:19:03,628
‐Vene‐thwela.
‐Vene‐thwela.

428
00:19:03,661 --> 00:19:04,695
Vene‐thwela.

429
00:19:05,763 --> 00:19:06,764
Why is Roald on your team?

430
00:19:06,797 --> 00:19:08,699
Can't be on the same team
if you're gonna fight.

431
00:19:08,733 --> 00:19:10,300
‐We're gonna fight?
‐Stewart?

432
00:19:10,334 --> 00:19:11,936
‐I refuse.
‐Then you fight me.

433
00:19:11,969 --> 00:19:13,370
‐You?
‐Or me.

434
00:19:14,705 --> 00:19:16,807
‐No.
‐Good. Roald, then.

435
00:19:16,841 --> 00:19:19,409
‐Roald is my best friend.
‐Stewart.

436
00:19:19,443 --> 00:19:21,578
Uh, whatever happened
to personal besties?

437
00:19:21,612 --> 00:19:23,013
Put it on a t‐shirt!

438
00:19:23,047 --> 00:19:24,481
I will not strike him.

439
00:19:24,514 --> 00:19:25,750
‐Don't have to.
‐(SCOFFS)

440
00:19:26,651 --> 00:19:27,718
Just. (SCOFFS)

441
00:19:27,752 --> 00:19:30,287
What in the fuck
is transpiring here?

442
00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:32,522
You can't get hit.
So, you're gonna dodge.

443
00:19:32,556 --> 00:19:34,291
Let your opponent
tire himself out.

444
00:19:34,324 --> 00:19:36,526
When he opens up, bam!

445
00:19:36,560 --> 00:19:38,663
‐Finish it, got it?
‐Got it.

446
00:19:38,696 --> 00:19:39,730
‐Good.
‐Go.

447
00:19:40,564 --> 00:19:41,799
ROALD: No.
ALL: Yes.

448
00:19:41,832 --> 00:19:43,500
ROALD: No.
ALL: Yes.

449
00:19:43,533 --> 00:19:44,635
‐No.
‐You want to see him

450
00:19:44,669 --> 00:19:45,970
get knocked the fuck
out in the city?

451
00:19:46,003 --> 00:19:47,437
‐No.
‐You want to see him layin'

452
00:19:47,471 --> 00:19:50,440
stiff as a board on
the dance floor? Snoring?

453
00:19:50,474 --> 00:19:51,541
No.

454
00:19:51,575 --> 00:19:52,777
Then help your friend!

455
00:19:53,878 --> 00:19:55,012
Roald.

456
00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:57,648
‐Help me.
‐(SQUEALS)

457
00:20:00,918 --> 00:20:03,053
I'll love you
till my dying breath!

458
00:20:03,821 --> 00:20:06,323
(GRUNTS)

459
00:20:23,573 --> 00:20:25,075
How the fuck did you do that?

460
00:20:26,677 --> 00:20:28,012
Dance Dance Revolution.

461
00:20:28,045 --> 00:20:29,513
Well he's tired, finish him.

462
00:20:29,546 --> 00:20:31,448
I will not strike
my best friend.

463
00:20:31,481 --> 00:20:32,582
Stewart.

464
00:20:34,084 --> 00:20:35,385
But I will finish it.

465
00:20:40,658 --> 00:20:42,526
‐Somebody count it.
‐Is he ready?

466
00:20:44,161 --> 00:20:45,663
You two will be there, right?

467
00:20:45,696 --> 00:20:47,865
‐There another hundo in it?
‐Yeah.

468
00:20:47,898 --> 00:20:50,067
‐Still.
‐Many ribs as you can hoover.

469
00:20:51,101 --> 00:20:52,837
So? Is he ready?

470
00:20:53,704 --> 00:20:55,039
(BOTH) Sure.

471
00:20:55,072 --> 00:20:56,707
STEWART: Can someone
count it out?

472
00:20:56,741 --> 00:20:58,442
Since I first pinned him,

473
00:20:58,475 --> 00:20:59,476
Roald has...

474
00:21:01,545 --> 00:21:03,347
Enhanced.

475
00:21:09,086 --> 00:21:10,420
You want to do what to me?

476
00:21:12,590 --> 00:21:14,391
First of at least a few, boys.

477
00:21:14,424 --> 00:21:16,994
No sex in the champagne room,
tight pants, busy hands.

478
00:21:17,027 --> 00:21:18,495
Where's fuckin' Dary?

479
00:21:18,528 --> 00:21:19,830
I haven't seen him
since that gal

480
00:21:19,864 --> 00:21:21,732
with the pole moves
got off stage.

481
00:21:21,766 --> 00:21:23,067
Hey, who wants a shotski?

482
00:21:23,100 --> 00:21:24,802
Hey, please and thank you,
cousint.

483
00:21:27,805 --> 00:21:29,573
I wish you'd enjoy the bounty,
tall and regal.

484
00:21:29,607 --> 00:21:31,508
Wish you weren't so fuckin'
awkward, bud.

485
00:21:31,541 --> 00:21:32,710
‐What's that?
‐Nothing.

486
00:21:32,743 --> 00:21:35,545
‐You want?
‐No, thank you.

487
00:21:35,579 --> 00:21:37,915
‐Respectfully.
‐Thank you, Tyla.

488
00:21:37,948 --> 00:21:39,984
Very cool, very cool.
Very nice, smooth.

489
00:21:42,486 --> 00:21:44,021
So?

490
00:21:44,054 --> 00:21:45,089
What was her steez?

491
00:21:45,823 --> 00:21:47,091
Who?

492
00:21:47,124 --> 00:21:49,459
Your runaway bride. Tits?

493
00:21:49,493 --> 00:21:50,828
Oh, I know a tit man
when I see one.

494
00:21:50,861 --> 00:21:53,698
Like the tits.
Like the ass, too.

495
00:21:53,731 --> 00:21:55,933
I like what's up top most,
you know what I mean?

496
00:21:55,966 --> 00:21:58,202
‐The eyes?
‐Grey matter, baby boo.

497
00:21:58,235 --> 00:21:59,804
I tell you, I like a tomboy?

498
00:21:59,837 --> 00:22:00,905
You did.

499
00:22:00,938 --> 00:22:02,572
Tomboy knows what she wants.

500
00:22:02,607 --> 00:22:04,074
No one knows
what they want anymore.

501
00:22:05,242 --> 00:22:06,576
But you know
a thing or two about that,

502
00:22:06,611 --> 00:22:07,612
don't you, cute butt?

503
00:22:09,013 --> 00:22:10,480
Yup.

504
00:22:10,514 --> 00:22:13,017
Everyone's always fuckin'
somebody else.

505
00:22:13,050 --> 00:22:14,719
How you like
ol' long dick, cousint?

506
00:22:14,752 --> 00:22:16,086
Fuckin' legend, amirite?

507
00:22:17,054 --> 00:22:17,955
Bottoms up.

508
00:22:17,988 --> 00:22:19,690
If you're not gonna
titty taste nectar,

509
00:22:19,724 --> 00:22:21,158
at least we're gonna get you
Liberace lubricated.

510
00:22:24,061 --> 00:22:25,896
Wayne?

511
00:22:25,930 --> 00:22:27,698
‐Dary?
‐I'm in love.

512
00:22:28,165 --> 00:22:29,700
With a stripper.

513
00:22:31,936 --> 00:22:33,604
‐Wayne?
‐McMurray.

514
00:22:33,638 --> 00:22:34,839
It's the stripper.

515
00:22:34,872 --> 00:22:36,506
She's in love with me.

516
00:22:36,540 --> 00:22:38,809
Fuckin' cool, very cool.
Very nice.

517
00:22:45,716 --> 00:22:46,851
Easy Bono.

518
00:22:46,884 --> 00:22:48,719
Don't poke the bear.

519
00:22:48,753 --> 00:22:51,021
They've been drinking for
a c‐hair short of 24 hours.

520
00:22:51,789 --> 00:22:52,790
I think we're good.

521
00:23:02,800 --> 00:23:04,501
(SNORING)

522
00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:11,541
Reilly and Jones?

523
00:23:13,143 --> 00:23:14,244
Reilly and Jones?

524
00:23:16,180 --> 00:23:18,182
‐He's Reilly.
‐He's Jonesy.

525
00:23:18,215 --> 00:23:21,185
You've been selected as
BROdude brand ambassadors.

526
00:23:21,218 --> 00:23:22,953
Congratulations.

527
00:23:22,987 --> 00:23:24,054
Are you seri‐dog?

528
00:23:24,088 --> 00:23:25,555
(SIGHS)

529
00:23:26,691 --> 00:23:27,758
She's seri‐dog.

530
00:23:27,792 --> 00:23:28,793
Photo.

531
00:23:43,140 --> 00:23:44,208
Sick, buddy.

532
00:23:44,241 --> 00:23:46,777
You guys sponsor the
senior hockey tournament, right?

533
00:23:46,811 --> 00:23:48,913
The National Senior
Hockey Championship?

534
00:23:48,946 --> 00:23:49,847
Yes.

535
00:23:49,880 --> 00:23:51,682
I can't believe
you guys thought of us.

536
00:23:51,716 --> 00:23:52,817
‐I didn't.
‐Oh.

537
00:23:52,850 --> 00:23:54,584
For the record, no part of this,

538
00:23:54,619 --> 00:23:56,954
not a shard of it, not a ribbon
of it, not a suggestion of it

539
00:23:56,987 --> 00:23:57,955
‐was my idea.
‐Oh.

540
00:23:57,988 --> 00:24:00,758
Also, for the record,
every fiber of my being,

541
00:24:00,791 --> 00:24:02,593
internal and external feels

542
00:24:02,627 --> 00:24:03,794
this is a horrifying waste

543
00:24:03,828 --> 00:24:06,130
of time, money, resources
and materials.

544
00:24:06,163 --> 00:24:07,698
And materials?

545
00:24:07,732 --> 00:24:09,233
I believe, the hats
you're wearing

546
00:24:09,266 --> 00:24:11,769
belong on the heads
of legitimate athletes.

547
00:24:11,802 --> 00:24:14,605
Professionals not washed up,
never have beens

548
00:24:14,639 --> 00:24:16,573
taking a victory lap
through whale shit.

549
00:24:16,607 --> 00:24:19,209
‐Gutty.
‐Well, whose idea was it then?

550
00:24:19,243 --> 00:24:20,645
‐Kids.
‐Kids?

551
00:24:20,678 --> 00:24:23,247
Juveniles, sprouts, squirts,
non‐voters.

552
00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:25,149
You know, the kids saw
you on TSN with

553
00:24:25,182 --> 00:24:27,051
all your chirp‐snipe‐celly
and this is

554
00:24:27,084 --> 00:24:28,919
relatable to them, apparently.

555
00:24:28,953 --> 00:24:30,287
It's actually wheel‐snipe‐celly.

556
00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:32,022
Not anymore.

557
00:24:32,056 --> 00:24:34,859
The term "wheel"
has sexual connotations.

558
00:24:34,892 --> 00:24:36,927
And may not and must not be used
by either one of you

559
00:24:36,961 --> 00:24:38,863
while wearing
the BROdude logo, got it?

560
00:24:38,896 --> 00:24:39,864
‐Got it.
‐Good.

561
00:24:39,897 --> 00:24:42,700
You know, the one win
I've had in this process

562
00:24:42,733 --> 00:24:45,135
is getting the brass to agree
to test you two on a trial basis

563
00:24:45,169 --> 00:24:46,604
before taking it to the media.

564
00:24:46,637 --> 00:24:47,938
Your task is to head up

565
00:24:47,972 --> 00:24:50,107
a regional initiative
branding project.

566
00:24:50,140 --> 00:24:51,876
Basically, because
you're basics...

567
00:24:51,909 --> 00:24:54,078
Start a club.
Right here in Lettercunty.

568
00:24:54,111 --> 00:24:56,981
‐Actually, it's pronounced...
‐I know how it's pronounced.

569
00:24:57,014 --> 00:24:59,216
See how many people you can get
on board with the BROdude brand

570
00:24:59,249 --> 00:25:00,918
locally and we'll go from there.
Okay?

571
00:25:00,951 --> 00:25:03,087
‐Sick.
‐Sweet.

572
00:25:03,120 --> 00:25:04,354
How's the photo?

573
00:25:07,925 --> 00:25:09,293
Oh my God.

574
00:25:12,697 --> 00:25:15,132
Has anyone ever told you two

575
00:25:15,165 --> 00:25:17,702
that you're unintentionally
hilarious?

576
00:25:17,735 --> 00:25:19,136
Because this is the lolziest.

577
00:25:19,169 --> 00:25:20,304
Look at you.

578
00:25:20,337 --> 00:25:22,172
You look like you're fighting
a second to second battle

579
00:25:22,206 --> 00:25:25,309
to keep your eyes from crossing.
And you,

580
00:25:25,342 --> 00:25:28,145
when you smile it looks like
you're saying the word "her"

581
00:25:28,178 --> 00:25:29,279
with a dozen "Rs"
at the end of it.

582
00:25:29,313 --> 00:25:32,182
Like, "herrrrrr."

583
00:25:32,216 --> 00:25:33,818
Try it with me. Both of you.

584
00:25:34,719 --> 00:25:38,656
(TOGETHER) "Herrrrrr."

585
00:25:40,057 --> 00:25:41,792
It's an appropriate look.

586
00:25:41,826 --> 00:25:43,828
Can you work your magic
or should we try again?

587
00:25:43,861 --> 00:25:45,029
No,

588
00:25:45,062 --> 00:25:47,765
never mind, I don't care.

589
00:25:47,798 --> 00:25:50,334
'Cause this will never
go the distance.

590
00:25:50,367 --> 00:25:52,236
You have your task,
start a club.

591
00:25:52,970 --> 00:25:54,672
"Herrrrrr."

592
00:25:57,074 --> 00:25:58,242
W.

593
00:25:58,275 --> 00:26:00,745
They don't ask how,
they ask how many.

594
00:26:03,147 --> 00:26:05,382
Who changed
the fuckin' tuneskis!

595
00:26:05,415 --> 00:26:07,718
Jock jams for daysss!

596
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:19,697
Ovi! Ovi! Ovi! Ovi!

597
00:26:19,730 --> 00:26:20,798
Perv row power naps.

598
00:26:20,831 --> 00:26:23,801
Very cool. Very cool,
very critical. Very clutch.

599
00:26:25,803 --> 00:26:27,137
How's the talent up north,
big boy?

600
00:26:27,171 --> 00:26:29,239
I gotta get me
a Canadian girl.

601
00:26:29,273 --> 00:26:31,008
Do they go?
Hook me up.

602
00:26:31,041 --> 00:26:32,309
Why would I do that?

603
00:26:32,342 --> 00:26:34,044
'Cause I'm your buddy Dierks.

604
00:26:34,078 --> 00:26:35,445
‐No, you're not.
‐Okay.

605
00:26:35,479 --> 00:26:36,714
I'm your pal, Dierks.

606
00:26:38,749 --> 00:26:40,217
I don't like you, dude.

607
00:26:40,250 --> 00:26:41,351
You fuckin' with me?

608
00:26:41,385 --> 00:26:43,387
I've met a million guys like you

609
00:26:43,420 --> 00:26:44,955
and you're the worst of 'em all.

610
00:26:44,989 --> 00:26:45,856
Perhaps a little big?

611
00:26:45,890 --> 00:26:47,357
I'm never gonna
fuckin' see you again,

612
00:26:47,391 --> 00:26:49,359
so let me leave you with this,

613
00:26:49,393 --> 00:26:52,162
clean it up and keep it tidy,

614
00:26:52,196 --> 00:26:54,164
'Cause you're a fuckin' mess.