1 00:00:13,055 --> 00:00:15,057 Welcome back to Clash of the Cupcakes. 2 00:00:15,141 --> 00:00:16,434 Thank you, DJ Sweet Treats. 3 00:00:16,517 --> 00:00:19,145 Right now, I have to share some rather unpleasant news. 4 00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:21,772 Uh, we were supposed to have some very special guest judges today, 5 00:00:21,856 --> 00:00:23,065 specifically five of them, 6 00:00:23,149 --> 00:00:25,276 the legendary dance crew Jabbawockeez. 7 00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:26,360 But, uh, I got here today, 8 00:00:26,444 --> 00:00:27,778 and I didn't see 'em. 9 00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:30,906 Hey! 10 00:00:30,990 --> 00:00:32,116 I don't want to hear that. 11 00:00:32,199 --> 00:00:33,200 They were supposed to be here. 12 00:00:33,284 --> 00:00:34,201 I don't know what happened. 13 00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:06,859 Give it up for the Jabbawockeez! 14 00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:09,403 We'll be right back with more Clash of the Cupcakes. 15 00:01:16,077 --> 00:01:17,036 Hey, Dev. 16 00:01:17,119 --> 00:01:18,704 Uh, great job, man, great job. 17 00:01:18,788 --> 00:01:21,207 Uh, we got a small issue on the last segment, though. 18 00:01:21,290 --> 00:01:22,416 What's up, Lawrence? 19 00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:25,169 So the Jabbawockeez, they don't take their masks off. 20 00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:26,837 They need to take the masks off, right? 21 00:01:26,921 --> 00:01:28,047 They gotta taste the cupcakes. 22 00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:29,673 I don't know. Apparently, it's in their contract 23 00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:31,217 that they don't take their masks off. 24 00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:33,052 Like, somebody should have read that beforehand. 25 00:01:33,135 --> 00:01:34,261 Yeah, somebody, you. 26 00:01:34,345 --> 00:01:35,513 You're the producer that booked 'em. 27 00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:37,556 Ah, damn. 28 00:01:37,640 --> 00:01:38,557 For real? 29 00:01:38,641 --> 00:01:40,017 We gonna play the blame game? 30 00:01:40,101 --> 00:01:41,644 Maybe what we should be doing 31 00:01:41,727 --> 00:01:43,229 is putting our big boy pants on 32 00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:44,563 to figure out a solution. 33 00:01:44,647 --> 00:01:47,191 All right, Lawrence, what if, you know, 34 00:01:47,274 --> 00:01:48,692 some of the guys are dancing in the front 35 00:01:48,776 --> 00:01:50,277 and then one of the Wockeez 36 00:01:50,361 --> 00:01:52,613 just dips behind the table and eats the cupcakes there? 37 00:01:52,696 --> 00:01:54,073 See what happens when we have teamwork, 38 00:01:54,156 --> 00:01:55,449 when we work together? 39 00:01:55,533 --> 00:01:56,784 That was just my idea. 40 00:01:56,867 --> 00:01:58,494 Oh, oh. 41 00:01:58,577 --> 00:02:00,663 So we're just going right back to being childish, huh? 42 00:02:00,746 --> 00:02:04,041 I'm just gonna go let the Wockeez know our idea. 43 00:02:04,125 --> 00:02:05,835 Jesus. 44 00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:08,379 Hey, Dev. 45 00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:09,797 Hey, what's up, Lisa? 46 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:11,257 Just coming in for a quick touch-up. 47 00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:12,424 Sure. 48 00:02:13,342 --> 00:02:14,426 So you're Indian, right? 49 00:02:14,510 --> 00:02:15,427 Yes. 50 00:02:15,511 --> 00:02:16,929 Well, I'm friends with this Indian guy 51 00:02:17,012 --> 00:02:17,930 I think you might know. 52 00:02:18,013 --> 00:02:19,723 Come on, you're not gonna do that shit, are you, Lisa? 53 00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:21,851 You don't go up to white people and go, "Hey, you're white, right? 54 00:02:21,934 --> 00:02:23,477 I know this white person. You might know 'em?" 55 00:02:23,561 --> 00:02:25,813 Well, he said he went to college with you. Rohan? 56 00:02:26,397 --> 00:02:27,481 All right, I do know him. 57 00:02:27,565 --> 00:02:28,607 - Hmm. - My bad. 58 00:02:28,691 --> 00:02:30,818 That's the only time in history that hasn't been racist. 59 00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,903 Uh, Dev, urn, one more thing. 60 00:02:32,987 --> 00:02:35,072 When we sign off, make sure you go, 61 00:02:35,156 --> 00:02:37,575 "Thank you to the Jabbawockeez for blessing the stage." 62 00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:38,742 No, I'm not saying that. 63 00:02:38,826 --> 00:02:40,286 But you have to. It's in the contract. 64 00:02:40,369 --> 00:02:41,495 And when you say it, 65 00:02:41,579 --> 00:02:43,330 make sure you put a little pizzazz in it. 66 00:02:43,414 --> 00:02:44,623 Why didn't anyone read the contract? 67 00:02:44,707 --> 00:02:46,417 I did read the contract. 68 00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:47,710 I skimmed it. 69 00:02:47,793 --> 00:02:49,086 I didn't skim too well. 70 00:02:49,170 --> 00:02:50,254 I missed a couple of things. 71 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:52,506 - Jesus. - Shit. 72 00:02:52,590 --> 00:02:53,632 You're stressing me out. 73 00:02:53,716 --> 00:02:55,801 - Lawrence. - Huh? 74 00:02:55,885 --> 00:02:58,137 You really need to floss while we're doing our tapings? 75 00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:00,222 Hell yeah. I don't fuck with plaque. 76 00:03:00,306 --> 00:03:02,141 That shit like termites for your teeth. 77 00:03:03,392 --> 00:03:05,144 Motherfucker don't even want me to floss. 78 00:03:46,936 --> 00:03:48,354 The competition is over, 79 00:03:48,437 --> 00:03:50,981 and it's time for these cupcakes to clash. 80 00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:53,984 What will be the judges' cupcake conclusion? 81 00:03:54,068 --> 00:03:57,029 Wockeez, it's time for the taste tests. 82 00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:03,118 The Jabbawockeez have a very strict 83 00:04:03,202 --> 00:04:04,703 don't-take-their-masks-off policy, 84 00:04:04,787 --> 00:04:08,165 hence the dance routine instead of a traditional taste. 85 00:04:09,917 --> 00:04:11,627 I don't know if it's 86 00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:13,587 a secret identity issue or what it is, 87 00:04:13,671 --> 00:04:16,632 but really doesn't seem like a big deal to me. 88 00:04:21,178 --> 00:04:23,013 All right, guys, it's a 30-minute show. 89 00:04:23,097 --> 00:04:24,181 Let's speed it up here. 90 00:04:30,479 --> 00:04:32,982 Really just need you to take a bite of the cupcake. 91 00:04:37,861 --> 00:04:39,405 And the dance is over... 92 00:04:39,488 --> 00:04:40,656 finally. 93 00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:43,867 What is your decision? 94 00:04:50,916 --> 00:04:52,209 And the winner is 95 00:04:52,293 --> 00:04:53,752 Jake's Cakes from Henderson, Nevada, 96 00:04:53,836 --> 00:04:56,422 with their Red Velvet Underground cupcakes. 97 00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:58,465 Thank you so much for watching. My name is Dev Shah. 98 00:04:58,549 --> 00:04:59,925 This has been Clash of the Cupcakes. 99 00:05:00,009 --> 00:05:01,844 And I also want to thank the Jabbawockeez 100 00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:04,346 for... blessing the stage. 101 00:05:04,430 --> 00:05:05,431 We'll see you next time. 102 00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:06,640 Stay sweet, America. 103 00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:20,738 - Surprise! - Surprise! 104 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:22,072 Jesus! 105 00:05:22,156 --> 00:05:22,990 It's just us. 106 00:05:23,073 --> 00:05:24,074 How'd you guys get back here? 107 00:05:24,158 --> 00:05:25,576 Oh, there's no security. We just walked in. 108 00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:26,660 It was really easy. 109 00:05:26,744 --> 00:05:27,828 Figures. 110 00:05:27,911 --> 00:05:29,663 Thank you so much for this experience. 111 00:05:29,747 --> 00:05:31,248 We never thought we'd see the Wockeez 112 00:05:31,332 --> 00:05:32,458 so up close and personal. 113 00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:34,460 You know we're huge Wockee heads. 114 00:05:34,543 --> 00:05:35,461 Can we go meet them now? 115 00:05:35,544 --> 00:05:36,712 - We're so pumped. - Please, please. 116 00:05:36,795 --> 00:05:37,921 Yeah, sure. 117 00:05:38,005 --> 00:05:39,173 'Yes! 'Yes! 118 00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:42,509 Did you guys rehearse that? 119 00:05:42,593 --> 00:05:44,261 - Yeah. - Yeah. 120 00:05:48,766 --> 00:05:49,975 Hey, guys, I-I had some friends 121 00:05:50,059 --> 00:05:51,643 that just wanted to say hello if that's cool. 122 00:05:53,437 --> 00:05:54,605 Oh, my God. 123 00:05:54,688 --> 00:05:56,190 It's Joe "Punkee" Larot, 124 00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:58,025 Rynan "Kid Rainen" Paguio, 125 00:05:58,108 --> 00:05:59,693 Phil "Swagger Boy" Tayag. 126 00:05:59,777 --> 00:06:01,070 How do you know who's who? 127 00:06:01,153 --> 00:06:03,155 I can tell by their movements. 128 00:06:03,238 --> 00:06:05,783 You guys, that might have been your best performance 129 00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:08,619 since your dance with Taylor Swift at the 2013 Billboard Music Awards. 130 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:11,121 Yeah, it was even better than your routine with Shaq 131 00:06:11,205 --> 00:06:12,915 at the 2009 All-Star Game. 132 00:06:12,998 --> 00:06:15,542 And by the way, I'm Arnold, and this is Brian. 133 00:06:15,626 --> 00:06:17,628 And we know it's against Wockee code to talk, 134 00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:18,962 but we just wanted to come give you 135 00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:21,006 a quick Jabba bow to pay our respects. 136 00:06:26,845 --> 00:06:29,139 All right, what the fuck'? 137 00:06:29,223 --> 00:06:30,307 Okay, that's good, guys. 138 00:06:30,391 --> 00:06:32,309 I'm sure the Wockeez have somewhere to go dance. 139 00:06:32,393 --> 00:06:34,603 Take care, guys. 140 00:06:34,686 --> 00:06:36,313 Did I seem cool around them? 141 00:06:36,397 --> 00:06:37,523 Dude, you did so great. 142 00:06:38,816 --> 00:06:40,317 Thanks for hooking us up, man. 143 00:06:40,401 --> 00:06:42,111 Hey, do you want to grab dinner later? 144 00:06:42,194 --> 00:06:44,947 I can't. I'm actually grabbing dinner with Jeff Pastore tonight. 145 00:06:45,030 --> 00:06:47,741 Wait, the Jeff Pastore, the TV guy, Chef Jeff? 146 00:06:47,825 --> 00:06:49,368 Yeah. He's a producer on the show. 147 00:06:49,451 --> 00:06:50,452 He's kind of my boss. 148 00:06:50,536 --> 00:06:51,954 Wow, I love Jeff's Table. 149 00:06:52,037 --> 00:06:53,539 Did you ever see that Vietnam episode? 150 00:06:53,622 --> 00:06:55,082 It was pho-nomenal. 151 00:06:57,084 --> 00:06:59,670 Did anyone ever say that before? 152 00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:01,713 Probably. At some point. 153 00:07:01,797 --> 00:07:03,173 I don't know. It's pretty good. 154 00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:04,299 I've never heard it. 155 00:07:04,383 --> 00:07:05,217 What are you guys doing now? 156 00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:06,677 Um, some friends of mine from Italy are in town. 157 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,762 Remember Francesca and Pino? We're going to the Brooklyn Museum. 158 00:07:08,846 --> 00:07:10,556 - Care to join? - No can do, bud. 159 00:07:10,639 --> 00:07:12,683 We're heading up to Queens to the Kids Foot Locker. 160 00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:14,768 The Wockeez are doing a little in-store blessing. 161 00:07:14,852 --> 00:07:16,687 We got to get those primo seats. 162 00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:18,188 Arnie, you're gonna block all these kids' views. 163 00:07:18,272 --> 00:07:20,023 First come, first served. 164 00:07:28,282 --> 00:07:30,367 Buona sera! 165 00:07:30,451 --> 00:07:32,786 Buona sera! 166 00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:34,204 Shah! 167 00:07:34,288 --> 00:07:35,789 Hi. 168 00:07:35,873 --> 00:07:37,207 - Wow. - It's so good to see you! 169 00:07:37,291 --> 00:07:38,375 I can't believe you're here! 170 00:07:38,459 --> 00:07:39,376 Neither can I. 171 00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:40,377 You're still Italian. 172 00:07:40,461 --> 00:07:41,587 Yes. 173 00:07:41,670 --> 00:07:42,588 How are you? 174 00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:43,881 I'm good. 175 00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:45,257 Where's your boyfriend, Mr. Pino? 176 00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:47,134 Well, he had to work. 177 00:07:47,217 --> 00:07:49,386 He's meeting some tile distributors. 178 00:07:49,470 --> 00:07:50,471 So it's just me. 179 00:07:50,554 --> 00:07:51,889 Well, the man loves tiles. 180 00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:53,891 So New York City? Your first visit? 181 00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:55,184 What do you think? 182 00:07:55,267 --> 00:07:57,853 I don't know. There's so much stuff here. 183 00:07:57,936 --> 00:07:59,521 Yeah. You should put that on a shirt. 184 00:07:59,605 --> 00:08:01,315 New York City: There's so much stuff here. 185 00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:02,941 Well, no, I mean it. 186 00:08:03,025 --> 00:08:05,068 I mean, I've been walking all day through the city 187 00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:06,612 just staring at the building like this. 188 00:08:06,695 --> 00:08:08,155 Ah! 189 00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:09,573 - I love it. - Ah. 190 00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:11,241 Well, that is adorable. 191 00:08:11,325 --> 00:08:12,409 I gotta tell you something, though. 192 00:08:12,493 --> 00:08:14,203 I am very hungry- 193 00:08:14,286 --> 00:08:15,829 Is there any way we can see the entire museum 194 00:08:15,913 --> 00:08:18,332 in, like, three minutes and then go get food? 195 00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:22,294 What does that mean? 196 00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:23,837 If you're good, I'll give you a cookie. 197 00:08:23,921 --> 00:08:25,130 - Yay! Deal. - Deal. 198 00:08:26,215 --> 00:08:27,216 Come on. Let's go in. 199 00:08:30,636 --> 00:08:33,263 - Oh, how is the cupcake show going? - It's all right. 200 00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:35,265 It's not the most inspiring gig, but it's okay. 201 00:08:35,349 --> 00:08:36,475 Hmm. 202 00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,353 Can I be honest? 203 00:08:39,436 --> 00:08:41,063 Oh, God. Go ahead. Have your fun. 204 00:08:41,146 --> 00:08:43,273 Shit on Clash of the Cupcakes all you want. 205 00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:47,444 Okay, I don't understand why do people watch this show? 206 00:08:47,528 --> 00:08:51,865 It's just a show about watching people eat cupcakes. 207 00:08:51,949 --> 00:08:53,158 I don't know. 208 00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:54,409 I just host it, all right? 209 00:08:54,493 --> 00:08:56,370 I say the contestants' names, 210 00:08:56,453 --> 00:08:58,455 and I announce the winners at the end. 211 00:08:58,539 --> 00:09:00,582 Really? That's all you do? 212 00:09:00,666 --> 00:09:02,084 Couldn't they just write it on the screen? 213 00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:05,087 They do, but I say it in a really enthusiastic way. 214 00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:06,421 - Okay, wait. - It's very important. 215 00:09:06,505 --> 00:09:08,465 I want to hear that. 216 00:09:08,549 --> 00:09:09,883 Right now? 217 00:09:09,967 --> 00:09:10,968 Yes, right now. 218 00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:12,094 Come on. Do it. 219 00:09:12,177 --> 00:09:13,679 - No way. - Please! 220 00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:15,264 We don't have this kind of show in Italy. 221 00:09:15,347 --> 00:09:17,307 Please, do it for me just once. Please. 222 00:09:17,391 --> 00:09:18,892 Please? Please? 223 00:09:18,976 --> 00:09:20,769 Please? 224 00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:22,980 Please welcome, all the way from Cleveland, 225 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:25,607 Karen from Karen's Confections! 226 00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:28,360 That was awful. 227 00:09:31,029 --> 00:09:32,114 Ah. 228 00:09:32,197 --> 00:09:34,908 So this is the piece that I really wanted to see. 229 00:09:34,992 --> 00:09:36,702 It's called The Dinner Party. 230 00:09:36,785 --> 00:09:38,245 Cool. 231 00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:42,040 Is it me or do all these look like vaginas? 232 00:09:42,124 --> 00:09:45,419 Yeah, it's kind of like saying that all these women across history 233 00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:47,045 have been discriminated against 234 00:09:47,129 --> 00:09:48,922 just because they have vaginas. 235 00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:50,257 Whoa. 236 00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:52,509 Did this lady have a piano vagina? 237 00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:54,928 I'm never going to a museum with you again. 238 00:09:57,848 --> 00:10:00,517 Oh, how was the-- the date the other night? 239 00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:01,518 It was fun. 240 00:10:01,602 --> 00:10:03,979 I had a lovely evening with this woman named Priya. 241 00:10:04,062 --> 00:10:05,606 Oh. Priya. 242 00:10:05,689 --> 00:10:07,024 - Oh. - Where did you meet her? 243 00:10:07,107 --> 00:10:10,152 I met her on, uh, one of those dating apps. 244 00:10:10,235 --> 00:10:12,070 What are dating app? 245 00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:13,530 It's like these apps on your phone 246 00:10:13,614 --> 00:10:14,823 where you see people's faces, 247 00:10:14,906 --> 00:10:16,825 and when you see a face you like, you hit a button, 248 00:10:16,908 --> 00:10:18,827 and if they hit a button on your face, 249 00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:20,787 then you have a match. 250 00:10:20,871 --> 00:10:22,205 And then you can send each other messages 251 00:10:22,289 --> 00:10:23,665 and then you go out on a date. 252 00:10:23,749 --> 00:10:25,542 Wow, when you say it out loud, it sounds insane. 253 00:10:25,626 --> 00:10:26,918 No, it sounds crazy. 254 00:10:27,002 --> 00:10:29,421 It is, but you meet people. You know? 255 00:10:29,504 --> 00:10:30,922 I had a good time with Priya. 256 00:10:31,006 --> 00:10:33,925 Okay, then tell me about your night with her. 257 00:10:34,009 --> 00:10:35,677 Um, well, we went to a wine bar. 258 00:10:35,761 --> 00:10:36,678 Mm. 259 00:10:36,762 --> 00:10:38,138 And then we went to this roof bar. 260 00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:39,181 Mm. 261 00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:41,308 And then we had some kissing in the cab. 262 00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:42,768 Oh. 263 00:10:42,851 --> 00:10:43,977 And then what? 264 00:10:44,061 --> 00:10:46,188 Did you call her the day after? 265 00:10:46,271 --> 00:10:49,024 I sent her a nice text message that night that said... 266 00:10:49,107 --> 00:10:50,984 Oh, that's sweet. 267 00:10:52,778 --> 00:10:54,988 ..."Hey, Priya, thanks for a lovely evening. 268 00:10:55,072 --> 00:10:56,573 I'm jealous of the lucky pillow 269 00:10:56,657 --> 00:10:58,450 that gets to hold your beautiful face tonight." 270 00:10:58,533 --> 00:10:59,743 That's nice, right? 271 00:11:01,244 --> 00:11:02,621 What? That's a nice text. 272 00:11:02,704 --> 00:11:03,997 If you got a text like that from a guy, 273 00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:05,332 you wouldn't be like, "Oh, that's sweet"? 274 00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:07,501 No, I would do, like, "Ugh." 275 00:11:07,584 --> 00:11:11,088 Well, Priya said, "Ugh, let's get dinner on Thursday." 276 00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,214 I'm right. You're wrong. 277 00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:13,256 I win. You lose. 278 00:11:13,340 --> 00:11:15,592 I'm out. Goodbye. 279 00:11:15,676 --> 00:11:17,594 I'm gonna keep looking at vaginas. 280 00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:23,934 Hi, um, I'm having dinner with Chef Jeff. 281 00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:26,019 Ah, yes, of course. He's right this way. 282 00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:39,950 Uh-oh! Here he is! 283 00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:42,160 Come here. Bring it in, huh? 284 00:11:42,244 --> 00:11:44,246 - Bring it in, brother. - Hey, how's it going? 285 00:11:44,329 --> 00:11:45,789 Good, man. Good to finally meet you. 286 00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:47,124 I'm sorry it's taken so long. 287 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:48,834 Oh, no problem. Uh, my pleasure. 288 00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:50,210 And now, full disclosure. 289 00:11:50,293 --> 00:11:52,045 It's my third dinner tonight. 290 00:11:52,129 --> 00:11:54,005 - Wow. That's a lot of dinners. - Yeah, it's not my fault, man. 291 00:11:54,089 --> 00:11:55,424 You know, I just wandered into Shuko, 292 00:11:55,507 --> 00:11:56,883 say hi to my friend Nick, he's all, 293 00:11:56,967 --> 00:11:58,427 "Chef, you gotta try this tuna." 294 00:11:58,510 --> 00:11:59,636 Story of my life, right? 295 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:01,012 Next thing you know, I'm ten courses deep 296 00:12:01,096 --> 00:12:02,597 - into the tasting menu. - Mm-hmm. 297 00:12:02,681 --> 00:12:04,099 So then I pop in to Casa Mono 298 00:12:04,182 --> 00:12:05,726 to have a drink with a friend, just one drink, 299 00:12:05,809 --> 00:12:07,144 next thing you know, I'm knee-deep 300 00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:08,687 in the best paella I've had all year. 301 00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:10,480 Crazy fuckin' night. 302 00:12:10,564 --> 00:12:11,773 Ah, well, full disclosure. 303 00:12:11,857 --> 00:12:13,442 This is my first dinner, 304 00:12:13,525 --> 00:12:15,402 and for lunch I had a boring salad. 305 00:12:15,485 --> 00:12:18,029 I ate half. Next thing you know, I'm throwing it in the trash. 306 00:12:18,113 --> 00:12:19,239 That's what you do. 307 00:12:19,322 --> 00:12:20,282 Gentlemen, compliments of the chef, 308 00:12:20,365 --> 00:12:21,533 octopus pizzaiolo, 309 00:12:21,616 --> 00:12:23,493 beef carpaccio Piemontese, 310 00:12:23,577 --> 00:12:26,288 and some fresh mozz that we made here in the house. 311 00:12:26,371 --> 00:12:27,539 Thank you, Tim. 312 00:12:27,622 --> 00:12:28,665 Tim, one second. 313 00:12:28,749 --> 00:12:30,417 There's something wrong with the mozzarella. 314 00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,461 Yep, just what I thought. 315 00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:34,337 It's fuckin' delicious. We're gonna need another round. 316 00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:35,839 - You got it. - Hey, hold me back, Tim. 317 00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:38,425 Hold me back. Dinner number three. 318 00:12:38,508 --> 00:12:40,385 What do you say you and I have a heart attack tonight, huh? 319 00:12:40,469 --> 00:12:41,386 That sounds pretty fun. 320 00:12:41,470 --> 00:12:42,596 I think you might really have one. 321 00:12:42,679 --> 00:12:44,014 I love it, man. 322 00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:45,265 Now, a little birdie told me 323 00:12:45,348 --> 00:12:47,017 you spent some time in Italia. 324 00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:48,226 True or false? 325 00:12:48,310 --> 00:12:49,686 Uh, the little birdie was telling the truth. 326 00:12:49,770 --> 00:12:52,022 I lived in Modena for a few months, learned how to make pasta. 327 00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:54,316 You're kidding me. Modena? Home of tortellini in brodo. 328 00:12:54,399 --> 00:12:56,151 We went there a couple years ago with Jeff's Table. 329 00:12:56,234 --> 00:12:57,319 Best episode ever. 330 00:12:57,402 --> 00:12:58,445 - You see that one? - Yeah, it was great. 331 00:12:58,528 --> 00:12:59,362 You remember that fuckin' scene-- 332 00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:00,405 Remember that scene where I'm sitting there 333 00:13:00,489 --> 00:13:03,033 with the old guy in the cafe with the hat? 334 00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:04,534 I actually didn't see it. 335 00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:05,827 You just seemed so fired up, 336 00:13:05,911 --> 00:13:07,162 I wanted to tell you I saw it. 337 00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:08,705 I love it. I'll send you a link. 338 00:13:08,789 --> 00:13:09,831 - All right. - All right. 339 00:13:09,915 --> 00:13:12,334 Hey, Tim. Where the fuck is that mozzarella? 340 00:13:12,417 --> 00:13:13,585 I'm kidding. 341 00:13:13,668 --> 00:13:15,086 I love you. I mean it. 342 00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:16,922 I'm inviting you to my next barbecue. 343 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:18,757 You better be there, you son of a bitch. 344 00:13:19,841 --> 00:13:21,218 I got him the job. 345 00:13:25,222 --> 00:13:26,181 This is so good. 346 00:13:26,264 --> 00:13:27,557 Yeah. All right. 347 00:13:27,641 --> 00:13:28,809 Favorite taco in New York. 348 00:13:28,892 --> 00:13:31,269 Mm, Los Tacos Number 1, the al pastor. 349 00:13:31,353 --> 00:13:32,479 Fuckin' kidding me, bro? 350 00:13:32,562 --> 00:13:33,647 Me too. I love that place. 351 00:13:33,730 --> 00:13:34,731 Holy shit. 352 00:13:34,815 --> 00:13:36,733 Hey, pastor pals over here. 353 00:13:36,817 --> 00:13:37,984 You know where I gotta take you? 354 00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:39,152 El Ferron. 355 00:13:39,236 --> 00:13:41,571 Playa del Carmen, Mexico. Look at this. 356 00:13:41,655 --> 00:13:42,906 - Look at that al pastor. - Oh! 357 00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:44,157 - Right? - That looks good. 358 00:13:44,241 --> 00:13:45,575 Have you ever gotten sexually charged 359 00:13:45,659 --> 00:13:46,660 from looking at a picture of al pastor? 360 00:13:46,743 --> 00:13:48,286 'Cause I'm a rocket right now. God damn. 361 00:13:48,370 --> 00:13:49,621 Look at that. Anything? 362 00:13:49,704 --> 00:13:51,122 I'm not erect, but it does look really good. 363 00:13:51,206 --> 00:13:53,166 I love your passion. 364 00:13:53,250 --> 00:13:54,793 You and I, we're gonna be having 365 00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:56,378 a lot of food together, I have a feeling. 366 00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:59,047 In fact, what are you doing this Friday? You around? 367 00:13:59,130 --> 00:14:01,049 I'm having a going away dinner at my place. 368 00:14:01,132 --> 00:14:02,425 Love to have you and a guest. 369 00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:03,885 I'm there. Who's going away? 370 00:14:03,969 --> 00:14:06,555 I am. I'm doing a pop-up dinner in Stonehenge next week. 371 00:14:06,638 --> 00:14:08,515 Speaking of which, I got dinner number four. 372 00:14:08,598 --> 00:14:10,308 I'm meeting some people from my new charity, Jeff's Kids. 373 00:14:10,392 --> 00:14:11,768 Love those kids. 374 00:14:11,852 --> 00:14:12,936 Don't have a heart attack. 375 00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:14,604 Timmy, can we get a check? 376 00:14:14,688 --> 00:14:16,439 Oh, Chef, the meal's compliments of the house. 377 00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:17,983 God damn it, you son of a bitch! 378 00:14:18,066 --> 00:14:18,984 You son of a bitch! 379 00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:19,985 They do this all the time. 380 00:14:20,068 --> 00:14:21,027 All right, tell him thanks. 381 00:14:21,111 --> 00:14:22,571 Oh, shit. I almost forgot. 382 00:14:22,654 --> 00:14:24,406 Bottle of champagne there, I brought that for you. 383 00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:25,699 You didn't have to do this. 384 00:14:25,782 --> 00:14:26,950 Hey. 385 00:14:27,033 --> 00:14:28,618 We're pastor pals. Okay? 386 00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:30,787 - FaceTime me. - I will. 387 00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:32,372 Damn. 388 00:14:52,976 --> 00:14:53,935 Talk to me, buddy. 389 00:14:54,019 --> 00:14:56,438 I need the game plan. Give it to me step-by-step. 390 00:14:56,521 --> 00:15:00,859 All right, start it off with some cocktails at PDT. 391 00:15:00,942 --> 00:15:02,444 Ooh, masterful. 392 00:15:02,527 --> 00:15:04,154 Classy cocktails. It's hidden. 393 00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:06,197 It's intimate. I love it. 394 00:15:06,281 --> 00:15:08,658 - You been to this bar before? - Yeah. 395 00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:10,660 - It's good cocktails, right? - Yeah. 396 00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:12,746 Hey, guys, flat or sparkling? 397 00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:14,122 Uh, sparkling, please. 398 00:15:14,205 --> 00:15:15,832 Uh, I'll do flat. 399 00:15:15,916 --> 00:15:17,584 So how was your day? 400 00:15:17,667 --> 00:15:19,002 It was good. 401 00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:22,589 Um, we did a taping of Clash of the Cupcakes. 402 00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:24,257 Uh, you know we had that dance crew 403 00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:25,884 the Jabbawockeez on earlier this week? 404 00:15:25,967 --> 00:15:27,385 Who is that? 405 00:15:27,469 --> 00:15:28,970 They're like these guys. 406 00:15:29,054 --> 00:15:30,680 They, like, dance and have masks. 407 00:15:30,764 --> 00:15:31,848 They were really good. 408 00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:33,058 Cool. 409 00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:34,267 Um, how about you? 410 00:15:34,351 --> 00:15:35,352 How was your day? 411 00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:37,771 Yeah, it was a pretty normal day. 412 00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:40,065 Just meetings and whatnot. 413 00:15:40,148 --> 00:15:41,358 All right. 414 00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:46,613 Went with sparkling water, huh? 415 00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:47,614 Yeah. 416 00:15:47,697 --> 00:15:49,491 I'm more of a flat water guy. 417 00:15:49,574 --> 00:15:51,701 Sometimes I'll do sparkling water with lemon. 418 00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:53,787 That's fun. 419 00:15:53,870 --> 00:15:54,871 I like flat water too. 420 00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:56,998 I mean, they're both good. 421 00:15:57,082 --> 00:15:58,500 Yeah. 422 00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,377 They both are good. 423 00:16:02,879 --> 00:16:04,547 Okay, where are we headed to next? 424 00:16:04,631 --> 00:16:07,842 For dinner, I'm thinking something fun, festive: 425 00:16:07,926 --> 00:16:09,386 a little barbecue. 426 00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:10,720 No. Not authorized. 427 00:16:10,804 --> 00:16:11,638 What? Why? 428 00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:13,556 You'll have that sticky sauce all over your face. 429 00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:14,557 That's not a cute look. 430 00:16:14,641 --> 00:16:16,309 Ooh, good point. 431 00:16:16,393 --> 00:16:18,228 See, this is why we have these talks. 432 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:19,521 How about this? 433 00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:21,982 Dinner at Il Buco. 434 00:16:22,065 --> 00:16:24,192 Perfecto. Pasta: me likey. 435 00:16:27,112 --> 00:16:29,531 So, urn, should we split a few pastas? 436 00:16:29,614 --> 00:16:32,117 Oh, I don't really love splitting. 437 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,536 I'd kind of rather just order for myself if that's okay. 438 00:16:34,619 --> 00:16:36,579 Yeah, of course. 439 00:16:37,455 --> 00:16:38,331 But... 440 00:16:38,415 --> 00:16:40,875 they do encourage sharing. You sure? 441 00:16:40,959 --> 00:16:42,836 Yeah, I think I'm just gonna get the fish. 442 00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,295 All right. 443 00:16:44,379 --> 00:16:45,547 Don't ask for a bite of mine. 444 00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:46,548 - All right. - No, you can-- 445 00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:47,882 You can have a bite. 446 00:16:47,966 --> 00:16:50,677 Um... 447 00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:57,684 Doing anything fun for the weekend? 448 00:16:57,767 --> 00:17:00,937 Um, yeah, I'm going to a Rangers game. 449 00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:02,230 Are you into hockey? 450 00:17:02,313 --> 00:17:03,940 I know of hockey. 451 00:17:04,024 --> 00:17:06,609 Um, I've never been to a game, though, 452 00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:07,694 or watched one on TV. 453 00:17:07,777 --> 00:17:09,696 - But I've heard it's fun. - It's fun. 454 00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:10,739 Yeah. 455 00:17:10,822 --> 00:17:13,450 I grew up watching a bunch of sports with my dad. 456 00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:16,119 What about you? Do you watch any sports? 457 00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:18,246 I do not. 458 00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:21,458 Thank you. 459 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,628 So here, I guess they just pour you flat water. 460 00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:27,297 They don't even ask. 461 00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:28,840 Interesting. 462 00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:30,467 Hmm. Yeah. 463 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:33,970 I like how there's no ice. 464 00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:37,682 Sometimes water gets a little too cold. 465 00:17:37,766 --> 00:17:39,684 Yeah, this is a good temperature. 466 00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:48,401 Drinks, dinner, you got me nibbling on the bait. 467 00:17:48,485 --> 00:17:49,611 Now, reel me in, Cap. 468 00:17:49,694 --> 00:17:52,614 I mean, I think after dinner we should just 469 00:17:52,697 --> 00:17:54,324 have a nice little drink back at my place. 470 00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:55,283 Wait a second. 471 00:17:55,366 --> 00:17:57,118 A night cap with my Cap'? 472 00:17:57,202 --> 00:17:58,620 Wonderful. Ow, ow, ow, ow. 473 00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:00,330 I told you Arnie's big toe is sensitive. 474 00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:01,664 Please be careful, okay? 475 00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:03,083 It's the third time I told you. 476 00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:04,626 Sorry, bud. 477 00:18:04,709 --> 00:18:06,753 Thank you so much for dinner. That was great. 478 00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:08,046 Yeah. That place is good, right? 479 00:18:08,129 --> 00:18:09,589 Yeah. Yeah. 480 00:18:09,672 --> 00:18:11,508 Um, do you want to come over and have a drink? 481 00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:13,510 Oh, um, you know, I think I'm just gonna 482 00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:14,636 grab a cab and head home. 483 00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:15,762 I'm kind of tired. 484 00:18:15,845 --> 00:18:16,763 - Yeah. - Yeah. 485 00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:17,972 But thank you again for dinner. 486 00:18:18,056 --> 00:18:19,224 Yeah, that was really fun. 487 00:18:19,307 --> 00:18:20,308 Yeah, it was really fun. 488 00:18:20,391 --> 00:18:21,601 - All right. - All right, bye. 489 00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:27,732 Fuck. That wasn't fun at all. 490 00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:32,237 So how'd date number two with Priya go? 491 00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:33,988 Ugh. Not good. 492 00:18:34,072 --> 00:18:36,032 Every conversation was a struggle. 493 00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:37,784 I don't think I'm gonna take her to that Chef Jeff dinner. 494 00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:39,536 Dude, just take her. She's hot. 495 00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:40,537 And you got no one else. 496 00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:41,871 You're alone. 497 00:18:41,955 --> 00:18:43,581 Yeah, but it's gonna be a fun night. 498 00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:46,042 I want to take someone I'll have a good time with. 499 00:18:46,126 --> 00:18:47,043 Maybe I'll take my morn. 500 00:18:47,127 --> 00:18:48,044 That could be sweet. 501 00:18:48,128 --> 00:18:49,462 What are you, a loser? 502 00:18:49,546 --> 00:18:50,880 You can't take your mom. 503 00:18:50,964 --> 00:18:52,674 There's gonna be cool people there. 504 00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:54,259 And this ain't Leo at the Oscars. 505 00:18:54,342 --> 00:18:55,385 You gotta bring a date. 506 00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:58,388 Every girl in my phone hates me. 507 00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:00,682 - Or I hate them. - Mm. 508 00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:02,475 What about Jennifer Lopez? 509 00:19:02,559 --> 00:19:04,477 Why would that be a possibility? 510 00:19:04,561 --> 00:19:06,271 Because she just broke up with her boyfriend, 511 00:19:06,354 --> 00:19:07,856 Casper Smart, the dancer. 512 00:19:07,939 --> 00:19:09,065 And I know her nanny. 513 00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:10,692 And she probably watches Cupcakes. 514 00:19:10,775 --> 00:19:12,277 I highly doubt it. 515 00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:13,695 Dude, then take Priya. 516 00:19:13,778 --> 00:19:16,072 I'm getting sick of this problem. 517 00:19:16,156 --> 00:19:19,075 Can you come to the store with me and get a vacuum? 518 00:19:19,159 --> 00:19:20,827 No. I'm gonna go home. 519 00:19:20,910 --> 00:19:22,036 So we talk about your shit, 520 00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:23,454 but when I need a friend to give me 521 00:19:23,538 --> 00:19:25,206 a second opinion on a vacuum, you bail? 522 00:19:25,290 --> 00:19:26,499 Fine. I'll come. 523 00:19:28,084 --> 00:19:29,794 Nah, I'm tired. I'm gonna take a nap. 524 00:19:51,941 --> 00:19:53,943 Wow, nice apartment. 525 00:19:54,027 --> 00:19:55,195 Bella. 526 00:19:56,654 --> 00:19:58,948 This party's so cool. 527 00:19:59,032 --> 00:20:00,992 I mean, it's different than I expected. 528 00:20:01,075 --> 00:20:02,702 Really? What were you expecting? 529 00:20:02,785 --> 00:20:03,703 I don't know. 530 00:20:03,786 --> 00:20:06,998 Something like hamburgers and girls in bikinis? 531 00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:07,999 Why did you expect that? 532 00:20:08,082 --> 00:20:09,626 Well, it's America. 533 00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:12,045 All your parties are like that in your commercials. 534 00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:13,254 Oh, all right, that's true. 535 00:20:13,338 --> 00:20:15,673 - Dev. - Hey, Ravi! 536 00:20:15,757 --> 00:20:17,342 What are you doing here? 537 00:20:17,425 --> 00:20:19,135 One of my investors from Mumbai Muscle invited me. 538 00:20:19,219 --> 00:20:20,136 Oh, God. 539 00:20:20,220 --> 00:20:21,804 - Hi. Ravi. - Hi. 540 00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:23,848 CFO and chief dream ambassador of Mumbai Muscle, 541 00:20:23,932 --> 00:20:25,433 New York's number one desi-owned 542 00:20:25,516 --> 00:20:28,144 organic, non-GMO chickpea-based protein. 543 00:20:28,228 --> 00:20:30,230 Uh, Francesca. Italian person. 544 00:20:30,313 --> 00:20:31,356 No companies. 545 00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:33,149 Uh. Nice. 546 00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:34,484 She saw you do that. 547 00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:35,610 Huh. 548 00:20:35,693 --> 00:20:37,111 Why are you wearing a tuxedo? 549 00:20:37,195 --> 00:20:38,780 Why are you guys dressed so cas, man? 550 00:20:38,863 --> 00:20:40,073 I thought this was black tie. 551 00:20:40,156 --> 00:20:41,574 Is this not black tie'? 552 00:20:41,658 --> 00:20:42,909 No. This is a dinner party. 553 00:20:42,992 --> 00:20:43,952 Why would you rent a tux? 554 00:20:44,035 --> 00:20:45,119 Rented? No, I bought this. 555 00:20:45,203 --> 00:20:47,205 This is a wool tux. This is all they had left. 556 00:20:47,288 --> 00:20:48,790 I look way overdressed. 557 00:20:48,873 --> 00:20:50,166 This guy handed me his keys on the way in. 558 00:20:50,250 --> 00:20:51,793 I think he thought I was a valet. 559 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:53,628 Oh, are you guys bringing out more hors d'oeuvres? 560 00:20:53,711 --> 00:20:55,296 No, I'm just dressed in a tux, okay? 561 00:20:55,380 --> 00:20:57,215 - I don't work here. - My mistake. 562 00:20:57,298 --> 00:20:59,384 I gotta find the guy who gave me these keys. 563 00:20:59,467 --> 00:21:00,843 You guys let me know if you hear anyone 564 00:21:00,927 --> 00:21:02,512 talking about owning an Audi Q4. 565 00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,806 - All right. - Okay. 566 00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:11,229 Friends! 567 00:21:11,312 --> 00:21:13,189 Welcome to Jeff's table. 568 00:21:13,273 --> 00:21:18,278 Now, I want to start off tonight's meal with a question. 569 00:21:18,361 --> 00:21:20,280 Where are we tonight? 570 00:21:20,363 --> 00:21:21,489 Your apartment! 571 00:21:21,572 --> 00:21:22,615 Fuck you, Stewart. 572 00:21:22,699 --> 00:21:24,367 It was rhetorical. 573 00:21:24,450 --> 00:21:25,827 No, we're not in my apartment, 574 00:21:25,910 --> 00:21:29,080 but rather we've been transported 575 00:21:29,163 --> 00:21:31,624 to the hills of Achando, 576 00:21:31,708 --> 00:21:33,876 deep in the heart of Basque country. 577 00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:35,962 Now, I just checked the forecast, 578 00:21:36,045 --> 00:21:38,715 and there is a tornado of Iberian flavor 579 00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:39,841 headed this way. 580 00:21:39,924 --> 00:21:41,134 So take cover, people. 581 00:21:42,302 --> 00:21:43,761 Thanks for coming, okay? Eat up. 582 00:21:43,845 --> 00:21:44,971 Hey, Dev. 583 00:21:48,016 --> 00:21:49,017 - Hey, man. - Hey, how are you? 584 00:21:49,100 --> 00:21:50,310 Great to see you. 585 00:21:50,393 --> 00:21:51,561 Thanks for coming. Who's this? 586 00:21:51,644 --> 00:21:53,313 Hi. Francesca. Thanks for having me. 587 00:21:53,396 --> 00:21:55,440 Hi. Jeff Pastore. It's a pleasure to meet you. 588 00:21:55,523 --> 00:21:57,692 I want you guys to do me a favor here. 589 00:21:57,775 --> 00:22:01,362 I want you to put this in your mouths... 590 00:22:01,446 --> 00:22:02,947 Okay. 591 00:22:03,031 --> 00:22:06,034 And tell me the first thing that comes to your mind. 592 00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:08,453 Mmm. 593 00:22:08,536 --> 00:22:09,537 Deliciousness. 594 00:22:10,913 --> 00:22:13,082 - Ham? - Wonderful! 595 00:22:13,166 --> 00:22:14,751 All right, you guys have fun. 596 00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:15,918 I'm gonna go play host. 597 00:22:17,170 --> 00:22:18,588 What's up? 598 00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:20,548 What happened to your tuxedo? 599 00:22:20,631 --> 00:22:22,675 Ah, man, I felt a little self-conscious in it, 600 00:22:22,759 --> 00:22:25,428 so I, uh, took the shirt and jacket 601 00:22:25,511 --> 00:22:27,472 and I hid it under the bathroom sink. 602 00:22:27,555 --> 00:22:29,349 Could have just put it in the coat room. 603 00:22:30,433 --> 00:22:32,435 - Fuck! I didn't think about that. - I have my weed pen. 604 00:22:32,518 --> 00:22:34,062 You guys want to smoke a little before dinner? 605 00:22:34,145 --> 00:22:35,021 Oh, sure. 606 00:22:35,104 --> 00:22:37,023 Oh, no, man, I gotta lay off the gas tonight. 607 00:22:37,106 --> 00:22:39,317 I gotta keep my wits about me for some networking. 608 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:40,693 Oh. 609 00:22:40,777 --> 00:22:42,236 Check out my new biz cards. 610 00:22:44,030 --> 00:22:45,531 B-b-boom. 611 00:22:45,615 --> 00:22:46,949 Is that shaped like your arm? 612 00:22:47,033 --> 00:22:48,826 Yeah. No. 613 00:22:48,910 --> 00:22:51,412 That's my boy Anush's real Indian bicep. 614 00:22:51,496 --> 00:22:53,623 - He can curl 150 pounds. - Hmm. 615 00:22:53,706 --> 00:22:56,542 Do you have a muscle-shaped wallet I could store it in? 616 00:22:56,626 --> 00:22:58,586 All right, that's enough Ravi time. 617 00:22:58,669 --> 00:22:59,712 Let's go. 618 00:22:59,796 --> 00:23:01,464 - Can I keep it? - Yeah, please. 619 00:23:01,547 --> 00:23:02,590 My email's on there. 620 00:23:05,510 --> 00:23:07,261 Hey, you guys work out? 621 00:23:22,235 --> 00:23:24,946 Hey, John, why don't you put that crema catalana down 622 00:23:25,029 --> 00:23:26,739 and play us a tune, man? 623 00:23:26,823 --> 00:23:27,865 Come on. Right? 624 00:23:30,618 --> 00:23:32,203 I guess I gotta sing for my supper now? 625 00:23:32,286 --> 00:23:33,204 Fuckin' guy. 626 00:23:33,287 --> 00:23:35,373 He wins one Oscar, he thinks he gets everything for free. 627 00:23:35,456 --> 00:23:36,958 I'm kidding. 628 00:23:37,041 --> 00:23:38,709 I love you. Truth. 629 00:23:38,793 --> 00:23:40,962 All right, yeah. 630 00:23:41,045 --> 00:23:43,339 All right, all right. 631 00:23:43,423 --> 00:23:46,092 I want to dedicate this song to my good friend 632 00:23:46,175 --> 00:23:48,803 and our host for the evening, Chef Jeff. 633 00:24:02,483 --> 00:24:05,778 ♪ Looking in my mirror ♪ 634 00:24:07,363 --> 00:24:10,575 ♪ Took me by surprise ♪ 635 00:24:12,118 --> 00:24:14,996 ♪ I can't help but see you ♪ 636 00:24:16,205 --> 00:24:21,711 ♪ Running often through my mind ♪ 637 00:24:21,794 --> 00:24:24,922 ♪ Helpless like a baby ♪ 638 00:24:26,424 --> 00:24:30,052 ♪ Sensual disguise ♪ 639 00:24:31,220 --> 00:24:34,223 ♪ I can't help but love you ♪ 640 00:24:34,307 --> 00:24:35,183 ♪ Yeah ♪ 641 00:24:35,266 --> 00:24:38,728 ♪ It's getting better all the time ♪ 642 00:24:38,811 --> 00:24:41,814 ♪ I can't help it if I wanted to ♪ 643 00:24:41,898 --> 00:24:44,108 ♪ Wouldn't help it even if I could ♪ 644 00:24:44,192 --> 00:24:46,611 ♪ Can't help it if I wanted to ♪ 645 00:24:46,694 --> 00:24:48,905 ♪ Wouldn't help it, no ♪ 646 00:24:48,988 --> 00:24:51,824 ♪ Can't help it if I wanted to ♪ 647 00:24:51,908 --> 00:24:54,327 ♪ Wouldn't help it even if I could ♪ 648 00:24:54,410 --> 00:24:56,829 ♪ Can't help it if I wanted to ♪ 649 00:24:56,913 --> 00:24:59,540 ♪ Couldn't help it, no ♪ 650 00:24:59,624 --> 00:25:02,168 ♪ I can't help it if I wanted to ♪ 651 00:25:02,251 --> 00:25:04,587 ♪ Wouldn't help it even if I could ♪ 652 00:25:04,670 --> 00:25:07,048 ♪ Can't help it if I wanted to ♪ 653 00:25:07,131 --> 00:25:11,052 ♪ Wouldn't help it, no ♪ 654 00:25:11,135 --> 00:25:13,346 ♪ Do doo-un do-do do ♪ 655 00:25:13,429 --> 00:25:15,681 Hey, you think it's cool if I snap a video on this? 656 00:25:15,765 --> 00:25:16,682 No. Go away. 657 00:25:16,766 --> 00:25:18,851 What about a picture? What's this party's hashtag? 658 00:25:18,935 --> 00:25:20,228 Put your phone away. 659 00:25:20,311 --> 00:25:22,438 That's cool. Live in the moment. 660 00:25:22,522 --> 00:25:23,523 I like that. 661 00:25:33,948 --> 00:25:34,448 Whoo! 662 00:25:36,327 --> 00:25:38,621 Whoo. 663 00:25:39,956 --> 00:25:41,874 Hey. 664 00:25:41,958 --> 00:25:44,877 What do you think that guy's doing over there? 665 00:25:44,961 --> 00:25:46,921 It looks like he's doing yoga. 666 00:25:47,964 --> 00:25:50,466 I think he's just sitting in a really weird way. 667 00:25:50,550 --> 00:25:51,467 Maybe. 668 00:25:51,551 --> 00:25:53,970 I mean, I don't know. Isn't that what yoga is, sitting in weird ways? 669 00:25:54,053 --> 00:25:56,556 No, it's not just that. 670 00:25:59,976 --> 00:26:02,186 Merda. I think it's finished. 671 00:26:02,228 --> 00:26:03,813 What's "merd-ah" mean? 672 00:26:03,896 --> 00:26:05,982 Um, it means "shit." 673 00:26:06,065 --> 00:26:07,316 It's an Italian expression. 674 00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:09,318 We use it to say, "Shit, it's finished." 675 00:26:09,402 --> 00:26:10,736 Mm. 676 00:26:10,820 --> 00:26:11,946 Can't believe you guys never taught me the bad words 677 00:26:12,029 --> 00:26:13,406 while I was living in Modena. 678 00:26:13,489 --> 00:26:14,448 You're right. 679 00:26:14,532 --> 00:26:15,491 I think I should teach you something. 680 00:26:15,575 --> 00:26:17,702 Okay, lesson number one. 681 00:26:17,785 --> 00:26:18,995 Um... 682 00:26:19,078 --> 00:26:20,913 Figlio di puttana. 683 00:26:20,997 --> 00:26:22,582 It means "Son of a whore." 684 00:26:22,665 --> 00:26:24,792 Figlio di puttana. 685 00:26:24,875 --> 00:26:27,712 And there is bruto cornuto. 686 00:26:27,795 --> 00:26:28,713 What does that mean? 687 00:26:28,796 --> 00:26:29,714 That's really bad. 688 00:26:29,797 --> 00:26:30,965 It means "You're ugly, 689 00:26:31,048 --> 00:26:32,842 and your spouse is cheating on you." 690 00:26:32,925 --> 00:26:34,218 Just those two words? 691 00:26:34,302 --> 00:26:35,803 - Yeah. - Ooh. When's the last time you said that? 692 00:26:35,886 --> 00:26:37,847 I never say that. It's really, really bad. 693 00:26:37,930 --> 00:26:40,266 - Hmm. - I just say... 694 00:26:40,349 --> 00:26:41,392 What does that mean? 695 00:26:41,475 --> 00:26:43,269 It means "Go fuck yourself 696 00:26:43,352 --> 00:26:44,979 and all your dead family members." 697 00:26:45,062 --> 00:26:47,523 Wow. That's cold. 698 00:26:47,607 --> 00:26:50,151 When I'm mad, I just go, "Hey. 699 00:26:50,234 --> 00:26:51,777 Why you gotta be like that?" 700 00:26:51,861 --> 00:26:52,737 You're evil. 701 00:26:52,820 --> 00:26:53,946 I'm not. 702 00:26:54,030 --> 00:26:55,656 I'm not evil. 703 00:26:55,740 --> 00:26:57,658 Am I evil? 704 00:26:57,742 --> 00:26:59,368 Hmm... 705 00:26:59,452 --> 00:27:00,786 No. I think you're sweet. 706 00:27:03,039 --> 00:27:06,250 I forgot how fun it was having you around. 707 00:27:06,334 --> 00:27:08,961 I mean, I'm just with Mario and Nonna in the shop. 708 00:27:09,045 --> 00:27:10,463 It's not the same thing. 709 00:27:10,546 --> 00:27:12,048 Well, he has way better cheeks than I do. 710 00:27:12,131 --> 00:27:13,341 Come on. 711 00:27:13,424 --> 00:27:14,967 I'm serious. 712 00:27:15,051 --> 00:27:16,844 I missed you. 713 00:27:20,473 --> 00:27:21,891 I'm good. I got my friends here. 714 00:27:24,977 --> 00:27:26,979 - Ah. - No. I-- 715 00:27:27,063 --> 00:27:29,065 I missed you too. 716 00:27:32,109 --> 00:27:33,694 All right, try this wine. It's amazing. 717 00:27:33,778 --> 00:27:34,820 All right. 718 00:27:36,489 --> 00:27:38,074 Mmm. 719 00:27:38,157 --> 00:27:40,326 Ugh! It tastes like feet. 720 00:27:40,409 --> 00:27:41,410 You're crazy! 721 00:27:41,494 --> 00:27:42,411 Ah, it's disgusting. 722 00:27:42,495 --> 00:27:43,496 Uh, excuse me. Uh... 723 00:27:43,579 --> 00:27:44,413 Mr. Jeff. 724 00:27:44,497 --> 00:27:46,123 Can you take a sip of this wine 725 00:27:46,207 --> 00:27:47,792 and let me know what you think about it? 726 00:27:47,875 --> 00:27:48,876 Assolutamente. 727 00:27:48,959 --> 00:27:50,044 Grazie. 728 00:27:51,921 --> 00:27:53,005 Ugh. Too barnyard-y. 729 00:27:53,089 --> 00:27:54,048 - Not a fan. - What? 730 00:27:54,131 --> 00:27:56,217 - You crazy too. - See? 731 00:27:56,300 --> 00:27:57,968 Gonna grab some of the wine that doesn't taste 732 00:27:58,052 --> 00:28:00,388 like white, uh, feet wine, whatever. 733 00:28:00,471 --> 00:28:02,098 Hey, I thought it was good. 734 00:28:02,181 --> 00:28:03,391 I'm gonna have to agree 735 00:28:03,474 --> 00:28:04,892 with your cute girlfriend over there. 736 00:28:04,975 --> 00:28:06,602 She's not my girlfriend. Just a friend. 737 00:28:06,686 --> 00:28:07,895 Really? 738 00:28:07,978 --> 00:28:09,105 Are you hoping for more? 739 00:28:09,188 --> 00:28:10,272 No, no, it's not like that. 740 00:28:10,356 --> 00:28:12,108 She's, uh, dating this guy, Pino. 741 00:28:12,191 --> 00:28:13,109 Pino? 742 00:28:13,192 --> 00:28:15,820 Uh-oh. It's not gonna end well for you, little D. 743 00:28:15,903 --> 00:28:17,279 What are you talking about? 744 00:28:17,363 --> 00:28:18,447 I can tell. I see the way you look at her. 745 00:28:18,531 --> 00:28:19,490 - Okay? All night? - Ah. 746 00:28:19,573 --> 00:28:22,410 Look, you better grab a mitt, 'cause you're gonna catch some feelings. 747 00:28:22,493 --> 00:28:24,078 Trust me. I've been there, okay? 748 00:28:24,161 --> 00:28:26,247 I'm looking out for you, kid. 749 00:28:26,330 --> 00:28:28,207 I don't want to see that little heart of yours get broken. 750 00:28:35,548 --> 00:28:38,551 Okay. Quick question for you. 751 00:28:38,634 --> 00:28:41,137 What's the difference between 752 00:28:41,220 --> 00:28:44,640 restroom, bathroom, and toilet? 753 00:28:44,724 --> 00:28:46,267 It's all the same. 754 00:28:46,350 --> 00:28:48,060 Yeah, I get that, but I mean, 755 00:28:48,144 --> 00:28:51,147 if I want to be polite, what should I use? 756 00:28:51,230 --> 00:28:52,481 Like if you're in a really nice place? 757 00:28:52,565 --> 00:28:53,858 - Mm-hmm. - Um... 758 00:28:53,941 --> 00:28:56,277 Then you say, "Uh, excuse me, um, 759 00:28:56,360 --> 00:28:58,070 where's the shitter?" 760 00:29:03,367 --> 00:29:05,035 I don't believe you. 761 00:29:05,119 --> 00:29:06,495 That sounds so rude. 762 00:29:13,878 --> 00:29:17,298 Um, uh, the hotel's right around the corner, sir. 763 00:29:17,381 --> 00:29:19,508 Oh, yeah. Thank you. 764 00:29:21,385 --> 00:29:23,679 What a night. 765 00:29:23,763 --> 00:29:26,432 I still can't believe it. 766 00:29:26,515 --> 00:29:29,310 I mean, New York, 767 00:29:29,393 --> 00:29:32,188 the food was amazing. 768 00:29:32,271 --> 00:29:36,233 And John Legend just played the piano in a room, 769 00:29:36,317 --> 00:29:38,694 and I was in that room too. 770 00:29:38,778 --> 00:29:41,030 Yeah, you were. 771 00:29:41,113 --> 00:29:43,324 This is insane! 772 00:29:43,407 --> 00:29:45,034 I mean, nobody's gonna believe me. 773 00:29:48,788 --> 00:29:50,164 Oh. 774 00:29:50,247 --> 00:29:52,541 I had so much fun with you tonight. 775 00:29:52,625 --> 00:29:54,710 Can we do something together again? 776 00:29:54,794 --> 00:29:55,669 Yeah. 777 00:29:55,753 --> 00:29:56,712 Do you want to do something tomorrow? 778 00:29:56,796 --> 00:29:58,130 Yeah! 779 00:29:58,214 --> 00:29:59,548 Oh, no. 780 00:29:59,632 --> 00:30:03,135 Uh, I have to go somewhere with Pino. 781 00:30:03,219 --> 00:30:05,346 And we actually leave on Sunday, 782 00:30:05,429 --> 00:30:07,264 SO... 783 00:30:07,348 --> 00:30:10,726 I guess next time, right? 784 00:30:10,810 --> 00:30:11,727 Right. 785 00:30:13,229 --> 00:30:14,355 Good night. 786 00:30:14,438 --> 00:30:15,648 Good night. 787 00:30:19,735 --> 00:30:20,820 Buona notte. 788 00:30:20,903 --> 00:30:22,238 Buona notte. 789 00:30:36,836 --> 00:30:39,046 You can go ahead to the next stop. 790 00:33:26,672 --> 00:33:27,881 Thanks.