[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
-[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING] -And welcome back to
The Available Guy with Tad Tucker.
The show where me, Tad Tucker,
tries to find love among a group of insanely jealous women.
I've already given koala roses to Kendra and Brittany.
BOTH: Ooh!
And now, I must decide
who gets tonight's last koala rose,
Theresa or Jennifer.
[BOTH GIGGLING]
-Theresa... -[GASPS]
...will you accept this koala rose?
Oh, yes, I do. I do!
-Our trip to the Great Wall of China was amazing. -Mmm!
-[GASPS] -It truly is one of the Wonders of the World.
-[KISSING] -[MOANING]
And so am I!
Sorry, Jenn, babe,
our hot air balloon date was hotter than hot
but I was disappointed
that you refused to eat the rabbit entree
that I cooked you for dinner.
I just can't see myself ever being with a girl
who can't eat an entire family of rabbits.
Sweet... [SUCKS FINGER]
Delicious... [SUCKS FINGER]
Defenseless... [SUCKS FINGER]
...rabbits.
-Let's go, Theresa. -[GIGGLING]
Fortunately, you girls love eating rabbits, don't you?
All right, now, who's ready for Hawaii?
[ALL CHEERING]
Hawaii, huh?
Let's make sure it's a date they'll never forget.
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
-[TROPICAL MUSIC PLAYING] -It's my first night here in Hawaii
and I feel I need to know Kendra a little better.
I've decided to set up a fire
and have a lobster boil here on the beach.
-Kendra, welcome to my beachfront paradise. -[LAUGHING]
[GROWLS]
-Oh, Tad, you are so... -Handsome?
Ha! It's not the first time someone's told me that.
Let me get you a sparkling cider.
Here we go...
Ah! [CHOKING]
It burns!
Get me a towel, quick!
Oh, thanks, Kendra.
Ouch! What the...
[SCREAMING] Ow! Ahh! Ahh!
-Kendra! -[SCREAMS]
Get them off me!
-[THUDDING] -You're not...
...hitting the lobsters!
You're hitting... [SCREAMS IN PAIN]
[WHIMPERS]...my face!
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
Morning! My date with Kendra didn't end up like I'd hoped.
I feel like we didn't connect
as often as that oar connected to my face.
So let's see how I do with Theresa zip-lining.
Theresa,
I admire your courage
to join me on this exciting leap of faith.
-You first. -Gee, we're awfully high up.
-Kendra did it. -[NERVOUSLY] Okay.
Whee!
[ZIP-LINE SLIDING]
And now it's my turn.
[WHOOPING]
[GROANS]
I appear to be stuck smack dab in the middle.
[SCREAMS]
Oh, no! Oh!
[ALLIGATORS HISSING]
-[SAWING] -[BLOWS]
TAD: Ah! Not the face!
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
Good evening. After watching me get attacked by alligators,
Theresa has decided to leave the show,
which only makes my choice that much easier.
So today I've got a snorkeling date with Brittany.
It's been great exploring this coral reef with you, Brittany.
I'm really starting to feel a connection.
[KISSING]
Shark!
Eat her first!
She's got more meat on her bones!
Excuse me?
[GASPS] What's this?
A remote-controlled shark fin.
[CHUCKLES] Well, I...
How dare you try to feed me to a shark.
And I do not have more meat on my bones!
-[GRUNTS] -[GROANS]
Okay, I deserve that.
Oh, no.
You're not gonna fool me this time.
-[ROARS] -[SCREAMS]
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
Today's the big day. I've decided that...
[FRIGHTENED] Lobsters?
...ask one of the girls...
[FRIGHTENED] Gators?
...to marry me.
[FRIGHTENED] Sharks?
I wanted to make the proposal to Kendra perfect.
That's why I've got rose petals, cologne,
and scented candles.
You see, if you want romance,
you need to create ambience.
-[SPRAYS] -[SNIFFS]
[SCREAMS] My whole suit smells like skunk!
While that washes
I'll just freshen up with a quick shower. [GRUNTS]
♪ I'm so hungry
♪ I could eat a family of rabbits
♪ Not one, not two rabbits
♪ But five
♪ Five makes a family of rabbits ♪
Oh, my suit's shrunk!
Oh! [GRUNTING]
Remember, folks,
he ate an entire family of rabbits.
Not one, not two, but five.
Five makes a family.
-[KNOCKING AT DOOR] -Coming, my love.
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
Hello, Kendra. Come on in.
My goodness, you're...
Ew. You've got something on your face!
Uh, you've got something on your face!
Well, it looks worse on your face.
[GASPS]
[EXHALES] Oh, no! It's the roses!
They're poison ivy!
[BOTH SCREAMING]
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
-Kendra? -KENDRA: You're on fire!
Dirty dingoes!
[SCREAMING]
-[GASPS] -Don't worry, folks,
there's still love waiting for Tad.
[SCREAMS]
Unfortunately, she's a real man-eater.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]
[FRENCH CAFE MUSIC PLAYING]
[EXPLODING]
[SNAPS FINGERS]
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
[GLASS SHATTERS]
[SPRAYS]
[SLAPS]
[SPRAYS]
[DISHES CLATTERING]
[DISHES SHATTERING]
[SINISTER MUSIC PLAYING]
[METAL CLANGING]
[WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[CAMERA CLICKS]
[ALL CHEERING]
[SINISTER MUSIC PLAYING]
[SLAPS]
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]