1 00:00:01,102 --> 00:00:01,242 . 2 00:00:02,270 --> 00:00:03,540 [upbeat music] 3 00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:07,239 - Mike, your father's coming over now. 4 00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:08,511 This is the perfect time to ask him. 5 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:11,479 - Why do you always want us to connect? 6 00:00:11,479 --> 00:00:15,519 Can I just run out the clock until he dies? 7 00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:17,286 - You and your dad have been getting closer, 8 00:00:17,285 --> 00:00:18,845 so let's keep that going. 9 00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:20,192 Here he comes. - Stop it, stop it, stop it. 10 00:00:20,188 --> 00:00:21,618 - He's almost here. Don't be nervous. 11 00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:22,722 - Dad, hey. - Hi. 12 00:00:22,723 --> 00:00:26,063 - It's game night. You wanna be partners? 13 00:00:26,060 --> 00:00:28,500 - Sure, why not? - Really? 14 00:00:28,496 --> 00:00:32,996 Thanks. I mean, I don't care. 15 00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:34,770 - It doesn't matter who your partner is, Dad. 16 00:00:34,768 --> 00:00:36,568 Stella and I always win. 17 00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:37,610 You know, now that you're adults, 18 00:00:37,605 --> 00:00:39,865 I think you can handle the truth. 19 00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:41,283 We always let you win. 20 00:00:41,275 --> 00:00:42,535 - What? 21 00:00:42,543 --> 00:00:44,283 - You let us win? - Don't be upset. 22 00:00:44,278 --> 00:00:46,178 We were just trying to bolster your self-esteem. 23 00:00:46,180 --> 00:00:49,350 - Not a parent's job. 24 00:00:49,350 --> 00:00:52,850 - With all the non-stop praise and trophies for just showing up 25 00:00:52,853 --> 00:00:56,363 your generation can't handle losing. 26 00:00:56,357 --> 00:00:58,687 - I don't want to win without actually winning. 27 00:00:58,692 --> 00:01:02,762 Stella, we're gonna win tonight, on our own, fair and square. 28 00:01:02,763 --> 00:01:04,503 - Yeah! 29 00:01:04,498 --> 00:01:07,438 If we're losing, let us win. 30 00:01:07,435 --> 00:01:09,365 - Are you kidding? We're going to crush 'em. 31 00:01:09,370 --> 00:01:10,900 Right, partner? 32 00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:12,774 Oh, I forgot the damn ketchup. 33 00:01:12,773 --> 00:01:15,583 - I'll get it for you... 34 00:01:15,576 --> 00:01:18,546 partner. 35 00:01:18,546 --> 00:01:20,606 - Bob. - Hey, Alice. 36 00:01:20,614 --> 00:01:23,784 - I have a big surprise for you. 37 00:01:23,784 --> 00:01:26,394 - Ethan! - Hey, Dad! 38 00:01:26,387 --> 00:01:28,757 - Hey! 39 00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:31,586 Everyone, it's Alice's boy, Ethan, 40 00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:32,862 the professional golfer. 41 00:01:32,860 --> 00:01:34,260 - Isn't he handsome? 42 00:01:34,262 --> 00:01:36,502 Lock up your daughters. He's single. 43 00:01:36,497 --> 00:01:37,867 - Mom. - Come here, Ethan. 44 00:01:37,865 --> 00:01:39,165 Say hi to everyone. 45 00:01:39,167 --> 00:01:43,437 - Martina? Stella? Oh, so good to see you! 46 00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:47,807 And who is your lovely friend? - Ethan, it's me, Shea. 47 00:01:47,808 --> 00:01:49,438 - Shea? 48 00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:51,183 Little Shea with the coke bottle glasses, 49 00:01:51,179 --> 00:01:53,979 acne, and dental headgear? 50 00:01:53,981 --> 00:01:57,691 - Yes, puberty was not my friend. 51 00:01:57,685 --> 00:02:00,745 Nor were any actual people. 52 00:02:00,754 --> 00:02:02,364 - Well, look at you now. 53 00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:04,556 Not that I'm looking. 54 00:02:04,558 --> 00:02:08,398 I mean, I am, but just the regular amount. 55 00:02:08,396 --> 00:02:10,956 - Hey, how about a round of drinks on the house 56 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,874 for my wonderful son? 57 00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:16,596 - Wow, all I did was get the ketchup, Dad. 58 00:02:16,604 --> 00:02:17,814 - Not you! 59 00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:18,935 Ethan! 60 00:02:18,939 --> 00:02:23,479 - Hey, Mike. My brother from another mother! 61 00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:26,447 - And father. 62 00:02:26,447 --> 00:02:28,047 So what brings you to Seattle, Ethan? 63 00:02:28,048 --> 00:02:30,348 - On my way to the Tokyo Pro-Am. 64 00:02:30,351 --> 00:02:31,451 The sponsors are putting me up 65 00:02:31,452 --> 00:02:32,822 for the night at the Four Seasons. 66 00:02:32,820 --> 00:02:33,920 - The Four Seasons, Mike. 67 00:02:33,921 --> 00:02:37,461 That's all the seasons there are. 68 00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:38,758 I remember you when I fitted you 69 00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:40,529 for your first set of clubs. 70 00:02:40,528 --> 00:02:42,328 Only ten years old, and you could already drive 71 00:02:42,330 --> 00:02:44,770 the ball 200 yards. 72 00:02:44,765 --> 00:02:47,025 - I still have those clubs, Dad. 73 00:02:47,034 --> 00:02:50,004 - You trying to make me cry? 74 00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:51,843 Well, a celebration is in order. 75 00:02:51,839 --> 00:02:53,639 I think we should move game night. 76 00:02:53,641 --> 00:02:55,111 - I love game night. 77 00:02:55,108 --> 00:02:57,348 And me and you, Dad, we're an unbeatable team. 78 00:02:57,345 --> 00:03:00,645 - Perfect! We'll be partners! 79 00:03:00,648 --> 00:03:02,648 - No reason not to be. 80 00:03:04,585 --> 00:03:06,345 Here's your stupid ketchup. 81 00:03:09,257 --> 00:03:12,257 [upbeat music] 82 00:03:12,260 --> 00:03:18,370 * 83 00:03:20,268 --> 00:03:22,568 - My client cancelled so-- 84 00:03:22,570 --> 00:03:25,740 Were you gonna eat that sugary cereal? 85 00:03:25,739 --> 00:03:29,109 - How did you figure it out, detective? 86 00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:31,849 - You specifically asked me not to buy sugary things, 87 00:03:31,845 --> 00:03:33,445 so you could cut down on sugar. 88 00:03:33,447 --> 00:03:36,317 - I only say that because you get turned on 89 00:03:36,317 --> 00:03:40,617 when I pretend I'm going to improve myself. 90 00:03:40,621 --> 00:03:42,991 - Mike, I know what it's like to give up something you love. 91 00:03:42,990 --> 00:03:45,830 I gave up smoking, which was the hardest thing I've done 92 00:03:45,826 --> 00:03:51,026 and I pushed humans out of me. 93 00:03:51,031 --> 00:03:54,641 - I hate when you win arguments using your vagina. 94 00:03:54,635 --> 00:03:55,665 I'll get rid of it. 95 00:04:02,142 --> 00:04:04,182 I feel so alone. 96 00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:09,180 - Do you think you're turning to cereal 97 00:04:09,182 --> 00:04:11,322 because when Ethan's around your dad shows 98 00:04:11,319 --> 00:04:12,619 an obvious preference to him, 99 00:04:12,620 --> 00:04:14,320 and deep down you know you need to confront him 100 00:04:14,322 --> 00:04:17,062 about the resentment you've been harboring for 20 years? 101 00:04:17,057 --> 00:04:18,657 - No. 102 00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:22,601 - So you don't think there's any sibling rivalry 103 00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:25,326 going on here at all? 104 00:04:25,333 --> 00:04:27,373 - No. 105 00:04:27,368 --> 00:04:29,468 I wish my step-brother would fail at something 106 00:04:29,470 --> 00:04:31,510 so I could be the good son. 107 00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:33,505 Does that make me a terrible person? 108 00:04:33,507 --> 00:04:36,037 - Yes, yes, it does. 109 00:04:36,043 --> 00:04:38,913 - Sweetie, there's stuff that I do 110 00:04:38,912 --> 00:04:41,482 in my therapy practice that might help. 111 00:04:41,482 --> 00:04:44,352 For example... we could role play, 112 00:04:44,352 --> 00:04:47,152 so I can show you that it's not gonna be as hard as you think. 113 00:04:47,154 --> 00:04:48,394 - And I'm going to do it 114 00:04:48,389 --> 00:04:51,489 just to show you what a bad idea it would be. 115 00:04:54,227 --> 00:04:58,367 - I'll be Bob and you say what's in your heart. 116 00:04:58,366 --> 00:05:01,636 - Okay, Dad... 117 00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:04,535 I loved having sex with you this morning. 118 00:05:09,510 --> 00:05:10,680 - Take it seriously. 119 00:05:10,678 --> 00:05:15,018 - I can't. You know why? It's dumb. 120 00:05:15,015 --> 00:05:17,915 - There's no wrong way to do this. 121 00:05:20,521 --> 00:05:24,561 - Dad... you've always preferred Ethan, 122 00:05:24,558 --> 00:05:27,598 and you're a mean son of a bitch with devil eyes. 123 00:05:28,896 --> 00:05:30,756 - Why won't you take this seriously? 124 00:05:30,764 --> 00:05:32,034 - Because, well, are we sure 125 00:05:32,032 --> 00:05:35,042 that therapy does anything? 126 00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:39,171 - Say what now? 127 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:40,812 - Now you're upset. This is what happens 128 00:05:40,808 --> 00:05:43,838 when you express your feelings. 129 00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:47,184 - Wow, you know what? I need some air. 130 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:48,220 - Shows what you know. 131 00:05:48,215 --> 00:05:50,845 Everyone needs air! 132 00:05:53,454 --> 00:05:55,494 Good one, Mike. 133 00:05:57,324 --> 00:05:59,034 - I can't believe they let us win. 134 00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:01,256 - I guess they wanted us to feel good about ourselves. 135 00:06:01,261 --> 00:06:05,101 I mean, who do they think they are, alcohol? 136 00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:06,298 - If we're going to win fair and square, 137 00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:08,339 we need to work our butts off practicing. 138 00:06:08,335 --> 00:06:10,335 - That sounds awful, but... 139 00:06:10,337 --> 00:06:12,707 Okay, I'll get the weed. 140 00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,106 - We can't practice high. 141 00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:15,237 - Why not? 142 00:06:15,242 --> 00:06:17,282 As long as we also play the game high, 143 00:06:17,277 --> 00:06:18,907 we're golden. 144 00:06:18,912 --> 00:06:22,682 You should really know that as a scientist. 145 00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:36,662 - [coughing] 146 00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:40,899 - Ethan? 147 00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:46,637 . 148 00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:49,539 - Please don't tell anyone, especially my dad and-- 149 00:06:51,612 --> 00:06:54,782 Mom! So good to see you! 150 00:06:54,782 --> 00:06:56,882 - Ethan Alexander Ellis, 151 00:06:56,884 --> 00:06:59,054 what the hell are you doing in this shed? 152 00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:01,292 - What are you doing in this shed? 153 00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:03,788 - A mother always knows where her son is... 154 00:07:03,791 --> 00:07:07,661 when she's got a tracking app on her phone. 155 00:07:07,661 --> 00:07:10,201 - Look, Mom, I actually came home 156 00:07:10,197 --> 00:07:11,627 to tell you and Dad something, 157 00:07:11,632 --> 00:07:13,832 but Dad made such a fuss about how proud he is of me 158 00:07:13,834 --> 00:07:15,544 that I chickened out. 159 00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:18,036 You see, I have this thing-- 160 00:07:18,038 --> 00:07:19,038 - A thing? 161 00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:22,079 Oh, my God! My baby's dying. 162 00:07:22,075 --> 00:07:25,105 - I'm not dying, Mom. 163 00:07:25,112 --> 00:07:27,012 My hands shake when I putt. 164 00:07:27,014 --> 00:07:29,324 It's called the yips. 165 00:07:29,316 --> 00:07:30,546 My golf career is over. 166 00:07:30,551 --> 00:07:32,891 - Aw, honey. - Aw. 167 00:07:32,886 --> 00:07:34,016 - There go my dreams of being 168 00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:36,661 the completely black Tiger Woods. 169 00:07:37,925 --> 00:07:39,855 They're not even sure what causes it. 170 00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:41,530 It could just be psychological. 171 00:07:41,529 --> 00:07:44,869 - Oh, my God! My boy's crazy! 172 00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:47,535 But none of this explains why you are in a shed. 173 00:07:47,535 --> 00:07:48,635 You've got money. 174 00:07:48,636 --> 00:07:50,536 - I had money. 175 00:07:50,538 --> 00:07:53,908 I also had the idea I could play high-stakes poker. 176 00:07:53,907 --> 00:07:58,247 - So you're crazy, broke, and you're not a golfer. 177 00:07:58,245 --> 00:08:00,675 Your father's a dead man. 178 00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:02,151 Okay, here's what we'll do. 179 00:08:02,149 --> 00:08:04,919 I'll talk to him. I know how to handle him. 180 00:08:04,918 --> 00:08:08,258 - Or... 181 00:08:08,255 --> 00:08:12,555 are we missing an opportunity for some real growth? 182 00:08:12,560 --> 00:08:14,130 - Martina is right. 183 00:08:14,127 --> 00:08:15,657 I should tell Dad. 184 00:08:15,663 --> 00:08:16,833 I'll do it at game night. 185 00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:18,270 There'll be a nice family vibe, 186 00:08:18,265 --> 00:08:19,295 he'll have a few drinks in him-- 187 00:08:19,299 --> 00:08:21,029 - All right, all right, but if you feel 188 00:08:21,034 --> 00:08:23,474 like you're going to cry, you just look over to me 189 00:08:23,470 --> 00:08:26,070 and I will step in and fix everything. 190 00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:27,343 - You know, Alice, 191 00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:30,110 this might be an opportunity for growth for you too. 192 00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:34,010 - Aw, all that therapy mumbo jumbo is for white people. 193 00:08:37,918 --> 00:08:39,588 - So tonight's game is Celebrity. 194 00:08:39,587 --> 00:08:41,047 I wrote this one. 195 00:08:41,054 --> 00:08:42,594 She was the first white woman 196 00:08:42,590 --> 00:08:45,230 on "The Real Housewives of Atlanta." 197 00:08:45,225 --> 00:08:46,885 - No idea. 198 00:08:46,894 --> 00:08:48,434 - Kim Zolciak? 199 00:08:48,428 --> 00:08:51,728 The Jackie Robinson of that show? 200 00:08:51,732 --> 00:08:53,502 She broke the color barrier. 201 00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:55,900 Everybody knows that. 202 00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:59,413 Nobody knows yours. Neil deGrasse Tyson? 203 00:08:59,406 --> 00:09:01,736 - He's a hugely popular astrophysicist. 204 00:09:01,742 --> 00:09:03,282 - Whatever. 205 00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:05,676 I don't get your whole space thing. 206 00:09:05,679 --> 00:09:07,349 Thinking about how big the universe is 207 00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:11,687 makes me feel like I'm non-significant. 208 00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:13,245 - Well, that's what I love. 209 00:09:13,253 --> 00:09:17,323 It makes everything seem small, even my problems. 210 00:09:17,324 --> 00:09:19,194 - Yeah, that's how I feel 211 00:09:19,192 --> 00:09:23,532 when someone famous looks like crap in their sex tape. 212 00:09:23,530 --> 00:09:26,630 I mean, that's the day you don't get your roots done? 213 00:09:28,301 --> 00:09:30,241 We're looking at the top of your head! 214 00:09:32,673 --> 00:09:36,013 - Mike. - Honey... 215 00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:38,979 Sorry for crapping on therapy. 216 00:09:38,979 --> 00:09:41,009 It's probably real. 217 00:09:44,117 --> 00:09:46,847 I'm gonna be an adult and I'm gonna talk to Dad about Ethan. 218 00:09:46,854 --> 00:09:49,994 - Oh, that's such a good idea! 219 00:09:49,990 --> 00:09:52,730 Oh, I'm so proud of you! 220 00:09:52,726 --> 00:09:54,696 But don't do it. 221 00:09:56,329 --> 00:09:57,829 - But you said I should do it. 222 00:09:57,831 --> 00:09:59,201 - I did say you should do it. 223 00:09:59,199 --> 00:10:00,369 - So I should do it. 224 00:10:00,367 --> 00:10:01,937 - No, you definitely shouldn't do it. 225 00:10:04,537 --> 00:10:07,467 - You know how you needed air before? 226 00:10:07,474 --> 00:10:08,844 Now I need air. 227 00:10:08,842 --> 00:10:10,442 Are you happy? 228 00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:13,113 You made me need air! 229 00:10:28,528 --> 00:10:30,228 You're not going to believe this. 230 00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:31,330 Ethan is living in the shed 231 00:10:31,331 --> 00:10:33,471 and he blew all of his money gambling. 232 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:36,166 - What? 233 00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:39,211 - You knew? 234 00:10:39,206 --> 00:10:42,406 - I bumped into him in there. 235 00:10:43,844 --> 00:10:45,114 - Does Dad know? - No. 236 00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:46,282 And you can't tell him. 237 00:10:46,279 --> 00:10:48,819 Ethan is going to tell everyone at game night. 238 00:10:48,816 --> 00:10:52,446 - [laughs] 239 00:10:52,452 --> 00:10:54,692 It's gonna crush my father. 240 00:11:00,761 --> 00:11:00,891 . 241 00:11:03,063 --> 00:11:03,433 [upbeat music] 242 00:11:04,397 --> 00:11:05,867 - So that was your first kiss? 243 00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:06,996 - Yes. 244 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:09,070 I never told anyone that story, 245 00:11:09,069 --> 00:11:13,139 even our coworkers at the Renaissance Faire. 246 00:11:13,140 --> 00:11:17,240 He may have only been a jester, but he was my knight that day. 247 00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,151 - Girls, game's starting! 248 00:11:20,147 --> 00:11:22,417 - Oh, no! We didn't practice! 249 00:11:22,415 --> 00:11:23,615 We did the exact thing everyone accuses 250 00:11:23,616 --> 00:11:25,046 our generation of. 251 00:11:25,052 --> 00:11:28,092 We agreed we deserve to win, but we didn't do the work. 252 00:11:28,088 --> 00:11:29,988 We just spent all that time getting to know each other. 253 00:11:29,990 --> 00:11:32,530 - Now don't you wish we'd gotten high? 254 00:11:33,493 --> 00:11:36,063 - Okay. I'm the time-keeper, 255 00:11:36,063 --> 00:11:39,773 but I'm also here to help anyone who needs help. 256 00:11:43,436 --> 00:11:46,336 The names are right there. Are we ready to play? 257 00:11:46,339 --> 00:11:48,579 - Let's just go first and get it over with. 258 00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:51,405 - Ready? And...go! 259 00:11:51,411 --> 00:11:53,911 - Ooh! You had your first sexy dream about him. 260 00:11:53,914 --> 00:11:54,954 - Benedict Cumberbatch! 261 00:11:54,948 --> 00:11:57,318 - Don't get it, but yes! 262 00:11:57,317 --> 00:11:58,947 Oh, that black guy that you like. 263 00:11:58,952 --> 00:12:01,092 - What now? 264 00:12:01,088 --> 00:12:03,558 - Neil deGrasse Tyson! - Yes! 265 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:05,586 Oh, I got into a fight about her at the DMV 266 00:12:05,592 --> 00:12:06,992 and that's why I don't have a driver's license. 267 00:12:06,994 --> 00:12:10,204 - Miley Cyrus! - Yes! 268 00:12:10,197 --> 00:12:12,797 - You don't have a driver's license? 269 00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:13,800 [bell dings] - Oh, my God! 270 00:12:13,801 --> 00:12:15,301 We're awesome! 271 00:12:15,302 --> 00:12:16,442 - Okay. 272 00:12:16,436 --> 00:12:20,336 Mike and Martina, you're up. 273 00:12:20,340 --> 00:12:21,370 Ready? - Mm-hmm. 274 00:12:21,374 --> 00:12:23,714 - And... go! 275 00:12:23,710 --> 00:12:25,550 - Easy! You said I look like her. 276 00:12:25,545 --> 00:12:26,805 - Uh... Lucille Ball. 277 00:12:26,814 --> 00:12:28,554 - What? 278 00:12:28,548 --> 00:12:29,818 She looks crazy. 279 00:12:29,817 --> 00:12:31,247 - I couldn't think of another redhead. 280 00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:32,291 Uh... Nicole Kidman. 281 00:12:32,285 --> 00:12:34,345 - No, the girl from "Zero Dark Thirty"! 282 00:12:34,354 --> 00:12:35,424 - Isn't that Nicole Kidman? 283 00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:37,422 [bell dings] 284 00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:38,834 - It was Jessica Chastain! 285 00:12:38,826 --> 00:12:39,826 - How could I say you look like her? 286 00:12:39,827 --> 00:12:42,127 I don't know who that is. 287 00:12:42,129 --> 00:12:46,569 - Oh, now I remember. I said I look like her, 288 00:12:46,566 --> 00:12:49,166 and you said, "I don't know who that is." 289 00:12:49,169 --> 00:12:51,499 - So the current score is 3 to 0. 290 00:12:51,504 --> 00:12:53,274 Seems like you're unable to win because you don't have 291 00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:57,143 the requisite skills to excel at the game. 292 00:12:58,378 --> 00:13:00,548 - We need to work on your trash talk. 293 00:13:01,949 --> 00:13:04,919 - Choking under pressure, huh? 294 00:13:04,918 --> 00:13:08,288 This is exactly why Mike never made it as a golfer. 295 00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:10,188 But at least I got one. 296 00:13:10,190 --> 00:13:12,530 - That big dummy's got a surprise coming. 297 00:13:14,261 --> 00:13:16,531 - Okay, Bob and Ethan, you're up. 298 00:13:16,529 --> 00:13:17,969 And, Ethan, remember, 299 00:13:17,965 --> 00:13:21,665 if you need any help, I'm right here. 300 00:13:21,668 --> 00:13:24,938 - He knows where you are, Alice. 301 00:13:24,938 --> 00:13:26,938 - And... go! 302 00:13:26,940 --> 00:13:29,440 - I like one of his movies, but hate the other one. 303 00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:30,512 - Kevin Costner. 304 00:13:30,510 --> 00:13:32,750 - Yes! 305 00:13:32,745 --> 00:13:35,045 You know me so well, son. 306 00:13:36,783 --> 00:13:39,353 That guy with the thing and they go into the thing. 307 00:13:39,352 --> 00:13:40,492 - "Ocean's Eleven"! 308 00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:42,587 - Yes! 309 00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:45,659 But the actor, the one with the face I want to punch. 310 00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:47,428 - There's so many! 311 00:13:47,427 --> 00:13:48,657 Narrow it down! Narrow it down! 312 00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:50,601 Clooney! Damon! Pitt! 313 00:13:50,597 --> 00:13:52,067 [bell dings] - Oh, to be fair, 314 00:13:52,065 --> 00:13:54,795 I would have punched all those guys. 315 00:13:54,801 --> 00:13:56,601 But it was Casey Affleck. 316 00:13:59,639 --> 00:14:01,809 Mike, remember when Ethan introduced me to Costner 317 00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:03,678 at that celeb tourney? 318 00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:06,706 Terrific grip on his handshake for a gay movie star. 319 00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:10,916 - Kevin Costner is not gay. 320 00:14:10,918 --> 00:14:13,488 - Oh, please, he's an actor. They're all gay. 321 00:14:15,422 --> 00:14:17,992 And before you girls jump down my throat, 322 00:14:17,991 --> 00:14:20,191 I'm fine with it. I shook his hand, didn't I? 323 00:14:22,295 --> 00:14:23,595 Hey, Ethan, you got any more 324 00:14:23,596 --> 00:14:25,626 of those celebrity tourneys coming up? 325 00:14:31,338 --> 00:14:34,568 - I'm right here, baby. 326 00:14:34,574 --> 00:14:37,114 - Why does Grandma keep saying where she is? 327 00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:42,051 - Well, I do have something to tell you, Dad. 328 00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:44,449 - He does. 329 00:14:44,451 --> 00:14:46,551 - And it's that... 330 00:14:48,956 --> 00:14:51,756 At the Tokyo Pro-Am, I'm going to play with Bill Murray. 331 00:14:53,660 --> 00:14:54,960 - He's my favorite! 332 00:14:54,962 --> 00:14:57,332 - I know and I'd love to introduce you to him! 333 00:14:57,330 --> 00:14:59,800 - Is this guy a hell of a son or what? 334 00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:02,741 - Hey, Ethan, why don't you call Bill Murray 335 00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:05,705 from your suite at the Four Seasons? 336 00:15:09,977 --> 00:15:12,647 It probably makes this place look like a shed. 337 00:15:16,649 --> 00:15:17,849 - Martina... 338 00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:19,490 - Guys... kitchen. 339 00:15:19,486 --> 00:15:20,616 Okay. 340 00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:22,560 You have to tell your dad the truth now. 341 00:15:22,555 --> 00:15:24,185 And you two have to shut up and let him. 342 00:15:24,191 --> 00:15:27,031 I know you all think that therapy's not effective-- 343 00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:29,357 - That's not what I said. - It's what I said. 344 00:15:31,798 --> 00:15:33,798 - Look, Ethan. 345 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:36,340 In therapy we say it's best to avoid words 346 00:15:36,336 --> 00:15:38,136 like "always" and "never." 347 00:15:38,138 --> 00:15:40,308 Express what you're feeling with "I" statements 348 00:15:40,307 --> 00:15:42,477 and come from a place of love. 349 00:15:42,475 --> 00:15:44,635 Got it? 350 00:15:44,644 --> 00:15:46,214 - Got it. 351 00:15:46,213 --> 00:15:47,813 - The living room's this way. 352 00:15:51,751 --> 00:15:53,221 - Bob? - Hmm? 353 00:15:53,220 --> 00:15:56,720 - Ethan has something to say to you. 354 00:15:56,723 --> 00:15:59,463 - Well, for starters, 355 00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:01,129 you're not gonna get to meet Bill Murray. 356 00:16:01,128 --> 00:16:02,858 - What? 357 00:16:06,199 --> 00:16:09,899 - You don't get to meet Bill Murray. 358 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,110 I'm sorry. 359 00:16:16,176 --> 00:16:17,436 Go on, Ethan. 360 00:16:20,247 --> 00:16:24,417 - The truth is... 361 00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:26,087 Bill pulled out of the Tokyo Pro-Am, 362 00:16:26,086 --> 00:16:27,816 but maybe you can meet him at the Phoenix. 363 00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:29,290 I'll give him a call. 364 00:16:29,289 --> 00:16:31,419 - Well, this is ridiculous. He's never gonna tell him! 365 00:16:31,424 --> 00:16:32,434 - Tell me what? 366 00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:33,925 - I'll do it, baby. - No! 367 00:16:33,926 --> 00:16:35,726 Ethan is going to do it himself in a healthy, 368 00:16:35,728 --> 00:16:39,898 therapeutic manner. - Oh, good lord! 369 00:16:41,634 --> 00:16:43,974 - I'm with her. 370 00:16:43,970 --> 00:16:46,440 Enough with this therapy baloney! 371 00:16:46,439 --> 00:16:48,309 - That's it! I can't take it anymore! 372 00:16:48,308 --> 00:16:50,108 Therapy is not baloney! 373 00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:53,250 It's real and I do it for a living. 374 00:16:53,246 --> 00:16:55,816 And thank God I do, 'cause otherwise, 375 00:16:55,815 --> 00:16:57,615 we'd be in a world where people just blurt out 376 00:16:57,617 --> 00:17:00,917 that Ethan's golf career is over and he's living in our shed! 377 00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:21,271 . 378 00:17:21,974 --> 00:17:22,684 - I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Dad. 379 00:17:24,277 --> 00:17:26,747 The last thing I'd ever want to do is disappoint you. 380 00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:27,776 I was embarrassed. 381 00:17:27,780 --> 00:17:30,620 - I'm embarrassed too for my outburst. 382 00:17:34,321 --> 00:17:38,431 But this isn't about me, so I'll just be right here. 383 00:17:38,425 --> 00:17:40,685 - Unfortunately... this means I'll need 384 00:17:40,693 --> 00:17:42,763 to stay with you until I get back on my feet. 385 00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:44,662 - I guess we got something in common, Dad. 386 00:17:44,664 --> 00:17:47,674 We both got kids who are disappointments living at home. 387 00:17:47,667 --> 00:17:50,397 both: Hey! - Hey! 388 00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:51,743 - Disappointment? 389 00:17:51,738 --> 00:17:54,508 This man is not a disappointment! 390 00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:56,807 It took a lot of guts for him to tell me the truth, 391 00:17:56,809 --> 00:17:58,649 the guts of a champion. 392 00:17:58,645 --> 00:18:00,505 A champion who needs a hug, I'm guessing. 393 00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:06,320 - Seriously? 394 00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:13,955 What are you doing here? 395 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:17,660 - Ethan told me you come out here to eat children's cereal. 396 00:18:19,065 --> 00:18:22,395 - Yes, alone. 397 00:18:22,402 --> 00:18:24,342 - What the hell's the matter with you? 398 00:18:24,337 --> 00:18:26,607 Whenever Ethan's around, you always get bent out of shape. 399 00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:28,066 What's your problem with him? 400 00:18:28,074 --> 00:18:30,984 - It's not Ethan; it's you! You're the problem! 401 00:18:30,977 --> 00:18:35,347 You never once give me... 402 00:18:35,348 --> 00:18:38,318 You always treat him... 403 00:18:38,318 --> 00:18:40,688 - What? Why do you stop? 404 00:18:40,687 --> 00:18:43,917 - It's best to avoid words like "always" and "never." 405 00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,193 - Why? 406 00:18:45,192 --> 00:18:48,032 - I don't know. It's something I heard. 407 00:18:48,027 --> 00:18:52,057 Look, Dad, I feel like you prefer Ethan to me. 408 00:18:53,266 --> 00:18:55,736 And it hurts... 409 00:18:55,735 --> 00:18:59,605 the feelings... 410 00:18:59,606 --> 00:19:00,836 of me. 411 00:19:03,310 --> 00:19:04,440 Ah, screw it. 412 00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:05,814 Just get out of here 413 00:19:05,812 --> 00:19:08,822 and let me eat my cereal. 414 00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:09,845 - Suit yourself. 415 00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:16,216 Look. 416 00:19:16,223 --> 00:19:19,833 When you were born, I was in a bad marriage. 417 00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:22,226 And maybe I associate you with that. 418 00:19:22,229 --> 00:19:24,899 But then I met Alice, and I was in a happy marriage 419 00:19:24,897 --> 00:19:29,597 with this little boy who really needed me. 420 00:19:29,602 --> 00:19:32,242 It probably won't make you feel any better, 421 00:19:32,239 --> 00:19:33,539 but the mistakes I made with you 422 00:19:33,540 --> 00:19:35,840 made me a better father to Ethan. 423 00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:38,952 - You are a good father. 424 00:19:38,945 --> 00:19:40,645 To him. 425 00:19:42,482 --> 00:19:46,522 - Plus Ethan, he looks up to me. 426 00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:48,889 He worships the ground I walk on. 427 00:19:48,888 --> 00:19:50,358 Do you feel that way about me? 428 00:19:50,357 --> 00:19:55,897 - I'd have to be delusional to feel that way about you. 429 00:19:55,895 --> 00:19:58,325 - You are a pain in the ass, Mike. 430 00:19:58,331 --> 00:20:00,531 - You are a son of a bitch, dad. 431 00:20:00,533 --> 00:20:05,043 - Look at us getting all mushy. 432 00:20:05,037 --> 00:20:06,037 What you got there? 433 00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:07,238 - Eh, Captain Crunch. 434 00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:10,380 - With Crunchberries? It's good stuff. 435 00:20:10,377 --> 00:20:11,537 You know, when you were a kid 436 00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:12,954 I used to take all the marshmallows 437 00:20:12,945 --> 00:20:14,505 out of the Lucky Charms. 438 00:20:14,514 --> 00:20:17,324 - Lucky Charms has marshmallows? 439 00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:21,890 - Good night, Mike. 440 00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:24,688 You can come out now, Martina. 441 00:20:28,194 --> 00:20:29,634 I may have been a bad dad, 442 00:20:29,629 --> 00:20:32,269 but I'm still a hell of a detective. 443 00:20:35,602 --> 00:20:39,542 - Lucy, you got some 'splaining to do. 444 00:20:39,539 --> 00:20:44,279 - So do you, secret sugar cereal eater. 445 00:20:44,277 --> 00:20:45,577 - Yours is way worse than mine. 446 00:20:45,578 --> 00:20:47,748 Cigarettes were never part of a balanced breakfast. 447 00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:50,517 - They were in the trailer park I grew up in. 448 00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:57,589 That was a great talk that you two had. 449 00:20:57,590 --> 00:21:00,430 And whoever gave you that "always" and "never" advice 450 00:21:00,427 --> 00:21:04,457 sounds like a beautiful genius. 451 00:21:04,464 --> 00:21:07,834 - I apologize for ever doubting it. 452 00:21:10,069 --> 00:21:12,539 Taste like cigarettes. 453 00:21:12,539 --> 00:21:15,679 - You taste like Crunchberries. 454 00:21:16,876 --> 00:21:18,706 - Lucky you.