1 00:00:01,102 --> 00:00:01,242 . 2 00:00:01,502 --> 00:00:02,042 - Good morning, everyone. 3 00:00:04,072 --> 00:00:07,112 Hey, who here likes cash, huh? 4 00:00:07,141 --> 00:00:10,241 [all exclaim] 5 00:00:10,278 --> 00:00:12,178 Oh, good, I'm glad you're excited, 6 00:00:12,213 --> 00:00:14,253 because our computer system is down, 7 00:00:14,282 --> 00:00:16,522 so today all we can take is cash. 8 00:00:16,550 --> 00:00:18,050 - What? - Why are you waving 9 00:00:18,086 --> 00:00:18,946 the cash around like that? 10 00:00:18,986 --> 00:00:20,786 - I thought it would make you excited. 11 00:00:20,821 --> 00:00:23,261 Like I was gonna give you the cash or something. 12 00:00:23,291 --> 00:00:25,161 - Yeah. - Hey, where's Amy? 13 00:00:25,193 --> 00:00:26,493 - Oh, she's been late a lot lately. 14 00:00:26,527 --> 00:00:29,127 Last Thursday, last Monday. Thursday before that. 15 00:00:29,163 --> 00:00:31,273 - Oh, no. What if Emma was kidnapped? 16 00:00:31,299 --> 00:00:32,529 - Yeah, what if she's getting kidnapped 17 00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:34,566 every Monday and Thursday morning? 18 00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:37,542 - It has nothing to do with Emma, okay? 19 00:00:37,571 --> 00:00:40,471 It's a personal thing. End of conversation. 20 00:00:40,508 --> 00:00:42,138 - Is it? - Beginning of conversation. 21 00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:44,376 - "Personal thing"? - Oh, my God, is she sick? 22 00:00:44,412 --> 00:00:46,282 - Zika, I bet. Everyone's getting Zika. 23 00:00:46,314 --> 00:00:47,824 - You know what? It's probably drugs. 24 00:00:47,848 --> 00:00:49,078 You can tell from her teeth. 25 00:00:49,117 --> 00:00:50,547 - It is not drugs! 26 00:00:50,584 --> 00:00:52,554 It's just marriage counseling. 27 00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:53,846 [all exclaim] - What? 28 00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:56,117 - How is that worse than drugs? 29 00:00:56,157 --> 00:00:57,487 - Is Amy gonna get divorced? 30 00:00:57,525 --> 00:00:59,625 - Look, I shouldn't have said anything, okay? 31 00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:01,860 Look, Adam hasn't even moved out. 32 00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:03,555 He's just sleeping in the basement. 33 00:01:03,597 --> 00:01:04,367 - What? - Shut up! 34 00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,568 - How is that worse than divorce? 35 00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:08,170 - Oh, my God. - That is so bad. 36 00:01:08,202 --> 00:01:09,642 - She told me this in confidence. 37 00:01:09,670 --> 00:01:13,270 So, you know, just clam up your face holes. 38 00:01:13,307 --> 00:01:15,277 Here she is. Shut up. Just shut up, just shut up! 39 00:01:15,309 --> 00:01:16,679 - [low voice] Shut up! Shut up! - Be normal, be normal. 40 00:01:16,710 --> 00:01:17,680 - Shut up! Shut up! - Be normal! 41 00:01:17,711 --> 00:01:19,211 [clears throat loudly] 42 00:01:19,247 --> 00:01:21,447 - [sighs] Sorry I'm late. Traffic. 43 00:01:21,482 --> 00:01:23,482 [all murmuring agreement] - It's okay. 44 00:01:23,517 --> 00:01:26,147 - Oh, man, traffic will slow things down. 45 00:01:26,187 --> 00:01:27,487 - Oh, dude, especially in this town, you know? 46 00:01:27,521 --> 00:01:30,121 With all the cars. - Traffic. 47 00:01:32,626 --> 00:01:35,426 - [hysterical laugh] 48 00:01:37,631 --> 00:01:38,701 Sorry. 49 00:01:42,170 --> 00:01:45,170 - Oh, okay. So everybody knows about my counseling. 50 00:01:45,206 --> 00:01:47,406 - Well, they do now! 51 00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:50,411 [upbeat music] 52 00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:56,154 * 53 00:01:56,184 --> 00:01:57,424 - Oh, hey. 54 00:01:57,451 --> 00:02:01,321 I just wanted to let you know I restocked all the toothpaste 55 00:02:01,355 --> 00:02:04,685 that Myrtle decided looked "just fine" in electronics, so-- 56 00:02:04,725 --> 00:02:06,885 - And? 57 00:02:06,927 --> 00:02:09,157 - And...what? 58 00:02:09,197 --> 00:02:10,397 - Well, I know there's more. 59 00:02:10,431 --> 00:02:11,931 - No, there's not. There's just-- 60 00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:14,495 There's just no shame in counseling. 61 00:02:14,535 --> 00:02:16,435 Is all I'm saying. - And there it is. 62 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:18,940 - No. Mental health is important and it shouldn't be stigmatized. 63 00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:20,942 I think it's ridiculous that-- - Jonah, please stop. 64 00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:23,944 I know you're trying to help me and I really appreciate it, 65 00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:26,247 but I don't want to talk about it, okay? 66 00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:29,620 I don't. I just want everybody to treat me normally. 67 00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:30,720 Okay? 68 00:02:30,751 --> 00:02:32,351 Oh, hey, Sandra, I-- 69 00:02:32,386 --> 00:02:34,216 - Shh. - Oh, God. 70 00:02:34,255 --> 00:02:36,915 - It's okay. 71 00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:38,387 You are loved. 72 00:02:38,426 --> 00:02:40,956 Mm-hmm. 73 00:02:40,994 --> 00:02:43,604 - Hey, Adam, it's Carol at Cloud 9. 74 00:02:43,631 --> 00:02:46,701 I got your number off of Amy's emergency contact form. 75 00:02:46,734 --> 00:02:47,704 I heard about you and Amy, 76 00:02:47,735 --> 00:02:50,535 and I just wanted to see how you were you-ing. 77 00:02:50,571 --> 00:02:52,941 "Youing"? How you were doing. 78 00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:54,283 [laughs] 79 00:02:54,308 --> 00:02:55,978 Why am I so nervous? 80 00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:59,679 - You trusted me with a secret, and I betrayed you. 81 00:02:59,713 --> 00:03:00,983 I'm a monster. 82 00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:02,784 If you want, you can tell everyone 83 00:03:02,816 --> 00:03:05,416 something embarrassing about me. 84 00:03:05,453 --> 00:03:09,763 A tiny spider once crawled into the entrance of my-- 85 00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:14,332 - Okay, I just-- I don't really 86 00:03:14,362 --> 00:03:15,962 wanna talk about this anymore. 87 00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:18,466 - Oh, Franklin and Bash, gabbin' away. 88 00:03:18,499 --> 00:03:19,769 What you talking about? - Nothing. 89 00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:21,440 - Spider story. - Amy! 90 00:03:21,469 --> 00:03:23,269 - Listen. Buck up, buttercup. 91 00:03:23,304 --> 00:03:25,244 I know exactly what you need. 92 00:03:25,273 --> 00:03:26,713 Ladies' lunch. 93 00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:29,780 Huh? You, me, whoever, not Glenn. 94 00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:32,380 - Um--yeah, no. 95 00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:34,283 I'm not really in the mood. 96 00:03:34,315 --> 00:03:36,715 - Come on. We can gab and dish 97 00:03:36,750 --> 00:03:38,590 and talk about our periods. 98 00:03:38,619 --> 00:03:40,689 Your red zone usually starts around the 24th, right? 99 00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:43,391 - Wha--is that something I'm supposed to know? 100 00:03:43,424 --> 00:03:44,994 I am the worst friend. 101 00:03:45,025 --> 00:03:46,455 - Yeah, you are. 102 00:03:46,494 --> 00:03:48,304 - Guys, it's not that big a deal. 103 00:03:48,329 --> 00:03:49,629 It's just counseling. 104 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:51,433 They're gonna be fine. - Yeah, but if 105 00:03:51,465 --> 00:03:53,265 the marriage goes pffft... 106 00:03:53,301 --> 00:03:54,471 I call dibs on Amy. 107 00:03:54,502 --> 00:03:56,742 - But you can't just call dibs on a human. 108 00:03:56,770 --> 00:03:58,040 - Why, did you already call it? 109 00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,071 - Did I? No, I--no. 110 00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:01,476 I don't have any interest in-- - He's already got 111 00:04:01,509 --> 00:04:02,639 a girlfriend. - Oh. 112 00:04:02,676 --> 00:04:04,706 - No, actually, Naomi and I broke up. 113 00:04:04,745 --> 00:04:07,275 - Whoa! - Because of Amy? 114 00:04:07,315 --> 00:04:09,845 - No, gross. Because she thought of me more as a brother. 115 00:04:09,883 --> 00:04:12,323 - But you don't have dibs on Amy, then. 116 00:04:12,353 --> 00:04:14,363 - No. - Cool. Dibs! Dibs infinity! 117 00:04:14,388 --> 00:04:16,658 No takebacks. Mm! Yeah! 118 00:04:16,690 --> 00:04:18,290 Durbs! 119 00:04:18,859 --> 00:04:21,629 - I feel so bad for her. 120 00:04:21,662 --> 00:04:24,632 - Oh, she is this close to a breakdown. 121 00:04:24,665 --> 00:04:26,425 - I know. 122 00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:28,797 I don't know what I would do without Jeff. 123 00:04:30,671 --> 00:04:33,341 - I can't believe she's still pretending to be dating Jeff. 124 00:04:33,374 --> 00:04:34,614 I'm dating Jeff, okay? 125 00:04:34,642 --> 00:04:35,742 She's dating no one. 126 00:04:35,776 --> 00:04:37,506 That's how the world works. 127 00:04:37,545 --> 00:04:41,515 - Someone sounds [singsong] jealous. 128 00:04:41,549 --> 00:04:44,519 [light music] 129 00:04:44,552 --> 00:04:47,862 * 130 00:04:51,559 --> 00:04:53,889 - I wish there were some customers here. 131 00:04:53,927 --> 00:04:56,827 I can't believe I just said that. 132 00:04:58,599 --> 00:04:59,799 Ooh, nice assist! 133 00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:01,843 - Hey, I played basketball when I was a kid 134 00:05:01,869 --> 00:05:04,099 until my parents let me stop. 135 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:06,367 - Okay, well... - Oh, hey, check it out. 136 00:05:06,407 --> 00:05:08,337 Moving target. - Oh, bring it on. 137 00:05:08,376 --> 00:05:10,906 - Three points. - Okay. 138 00:05:10,944 --> 00:05:12,814 - Hey, oh! - Oh, yeah! 139 00:05:12,846 --> 00:05:14,546 In your face, Brett! 140 00:05:14,582 --> 00:05:15,882 - Wait, I don't get it. 141 00:05:15,916 --> 00:05:17,616 It's one of the slowest days we've ever had. 142 00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:19,591 Why can't one of the warehouse guys load this? 143 00:05:19,620 --> 00:05:21,090 - I don't know. Dina just told me to 144 00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:23,561 and when I asked her why, she said, "Shut up, Sandra." 145 00:05:23,591 --> 00:05:24,931 - Shut up, Sandra! 146 00:05:24,958 --> 00:05:26,558 - What are you-- - Ladies' lunch. 147 00:05:26,594 --> 00:05:28,464 - No. No! No! 148 00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:33,797 [light music] 149 00:05:35,903 --> 00:05:38,643 * 150 00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:42,084 - This is for your own good. 151 00:05:42,109 --> 00:05:43,679 - Yeah, you didn't have to kidnap me, Dina. 152 00:05:43,711 --> 00:05:45,081 - Kidnapping is what you do to children. 153 00:05:45,112 --> 00:05:47,422 You're pushing 40. I abducted you. 154 00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:50,048 All right, everybody. First on the agenda: 155 00:05:50,083 --> 00:05:50,923 free talk. 156 00:05:50,951 --> 00:05:53,451 A couple of ground rules. No shop talk. 157 00:05:53,487 --> 00:05:55,717 Also, no religion or politics. Too divisive. 158 00:05:55,756 --> 00:05:57,556 Also, don't tell a story about someone 159 00:05:57,591 --> 00:05:58,761 we don't all know. 160 00:05:58,792 --> 00:06:00,732 It makes people feel excluded. 161 00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:03,431 Other than that, sky's the limit. 162 00:06:08,636 --> 00:06:11,166 - Have you guys heard the new Fetty Wap song? 163 00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:13,074 - We're not talking about music! 164 00:06:13,106 --> 00:06:14,476 Okay? That's just a bunch of sounds, 165 00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:15,778 and I can hear that anywhere. 166 00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:18,149 - Three, two, one! 167 00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:19,878 Muffin ball! 168 00:06:19,913 --> 00:06:23,123 - Into the mop bucket! - Yes, that's a niner! 169 00:06:23,150 --> 00:06:24,420 - He's looking to ten it. 170 00:06:24,452 --> 00:06:25,722 Oh! - Ow! 171 00:06:25,753 --> 00:06:27,193 - Oh! - You guys! 172 00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:29,120 Are you literally insane? 173 00:06:29,156 --> 00:06:30,556 - Sorry, Mateo. Could you throw us back 174 00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:31,591 the muffin ball, though? 175 00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:33,585 - [scoffs] I could. But I won't. 176 00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:35,927 - Hey, yo, you know what? 177 00:06:35,963 --> 00:06:37,903 We should get blockers. - I was just gonna say that. 178 00:06:37,931 --> 00:06:39,571 - Hey, thanks, Mateo! 179 00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:40,700 - I'm having a lot of fun with you. 180 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,674 - Don't ever say that to me again. 181 00:06:42,703 --> 00:06:44,203 Just get the blockers. 182 00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:47,167 - Can I start you ladies off with some drinks, or-- 183 00:06:47,207 --> 00:06:48,777 - No, we don't drink. [laughs] 184 00:06:48,809 --> 00:06:49,939 Can you imagine? 185 00:06:49,977 --> 00:06:51,847 Cut to: glug, glug, glug, glug. 186 00:06:51,879 --> 00:06:53,709 [chortling] 187 00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:56,577 Oh, uh, white wine. Two ice cubes. 188 00:06:56,617 --> 00:06:58,847 - I'll take a Rusty Spaniard. 189 00:06:58,886 --> 00:07:00,916 - I'm gonna have to see some ID. - Are you kidding? 190 00:07:00,954 --> 00:07:02,724 Look at her face. She's, like, 2,000. 191 00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:05,126 - [laughs] This is embarrassing. 192 00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:09,558 I left my ID at the lawyer office. 193 00:07:09,597 --> 00:07:11,197 - That's fine. What do you want? 194 00:07:11,231 --> 00:07:13,971 - I'll have four beers, please. 195 00:07:14,001 --> 00:07:17,471 - How about we order our meals at the same time 196 00:07:17,505 --> 00:07:18,865 and then maybe you can just bring the check now. 197 00:07:18,906 --> 00:07:19,936 That would be great. Thank you. 198 00:07:19,973 --> 00:07:23,143 So what is fast? 199 00:07:23,176 --> 00:07:25,506 - All right, Marcus, alley-oop me into the cooler, okay? 200 00:07:25,546 --> 00:07:27,246 - Now, Brett, come back, come back, come back! 201 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,180 - Oh, no! - Damn it! 202 00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:30,246 - He's got the moves like Jagger. 203 00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,193 - That's your fault, Marcus. - Me? Get your head 204 00:07:32,219 --> 00:07:34,249 in the game, man. - Mateo tattles me 205 00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:36,557 that you're playing a game instead of working. 206 00:07:36,590 --> 00:07:37,730 - Seriously, dude? 207 00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:38,958 - Yeah, you're misusing baked goods 208 00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:40,892 and hurting people's cashmere, so-- 209 00:07:40,928 --> 00:07:42,558 - Come on, man. - I'm sorry, 210 00:07:42,596 --> 00:07:44,196 but this game is over, okay? 211 00:07:44,231 --> 00:07:46,601 I'm throwing this away. 212 00:07:46,634 --> 00:07:47,604 - Oh! 213 00:07:47,635 --> 00:07:48,535 - Did you see that? - What? 214 00:07:48,569 --> 00:07:51,639 - Glenn, you just got a mannequin bumper. 215 00:07:51,672 --> 00:07:52,672 - Is that good? 216 00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:54,236 - Uhh! - Phew, I don't know. 217 00:07:54,274 --> 00:07:56,014 Is the best you can do good? - Whoo. 218 00:07:56,043 --> 00:07:57,713 - Come on, you had to play this before. 219 00:07:57,745 --> 00:07:59,645 - No, I swear. I mean, I'm on 220 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:01,280 my church's Wiffle ball team. 221 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:03,184 Well, I get the emails. 222 00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:03,976 - Ooh, well, I don't know. 223 00:08:04,017 --> 00:08:05,647 I mean, I'd say you're a natural. 224 00:08:05,686 --> 00:08:06,886 - I mean, that was incredible. - Mm-hmm. 225 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:08,290 - Yeah? - Glenn, they're obviously 226 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,561 manipulating you. - You're just jealous 227 00:08:10,591 --> 00:08:13,291 because I got a manne-bump on my first try. 228 00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:15,556 - Please! Anyone can hit that stupid mannequin. 229 00:08:15,596 --> 00:08:17,226 - Really? - Prove it. 230 00:08:20,233 --> 00:08:21,233 - Oh! - Ho! 231 00:08:21,268 --> 00:08:23,038 - Nice, Mateo! - Oh, yeah! 232 00:08:23,070 --> 00:08:24,270 - I did it. - Yeah. 233 00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:26,044 - Yeah, you did. - I'm an athlete. 234 00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:27,643 - Hey! - I'm an athlete. 235 00:08:27,675 --> 00:08:29,905 I did it! I'm Simone Biles! 236 00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:31,813 I'm Simone Biles! - Who? 237 00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:33,275 - Yes! Simone Biles! 238 00:08:33,313 --> 00:08:35,283 - The Olympic gymnast. - Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! 239 00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:38,950 - Ohh, thank you. - Okay, so... 240 00:08:38,986 --> 00:08:40,546 why don't we go around the circle 241 00:08:40,588 --> 00:08:43,018 and each name our favorite part of the penis? 242 00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:45,626 I'll go first. The bottom. 243 00:08:46,694 --> 00:08:48,304 - [clears throat] So, Cheyenne, 244 00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:50,058 how are things with you and Bo? 245 00:08:50,097 --> 00:08:52,227 - Great. You know, same old Bo. 246 00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:55,235 Little dangerous, little mysterious, 247 00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:57,238 little dyslexic. 248 00:08:57,270 --> 00:09:00,310 He recently lost his flip-flops so, you know... 249 00:09:00,340 --> 00:09:02,940 ups and downs. 250 00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:05,946 - And, um, Sandra, you're still with Jeff? 251 00:09:05,979 --> 00:09:08,719 - Um, yeah. It's fine. 252 00:09:08,749 --> 00:09:10,819 - It's fine? This is ladies' lunch, Sandra. 253 00:09:10,851 --> 00:09:11,921 We need deets. 254 00:09:11,952 --> 00:09:15,722 - Oh, okay. Um... 255 00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:17,926 We spend hours on the phone, 256 00:09:17,958 --> 00:09:19,958 just talking. 257 00:09:19,993 --> 00:09:22,663 He loves my taste in music. 258 00:09:22,696 --> 00:09:25,866 I spend the night at his hotel when he's in town. 259 00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:27,739 We make love on silk sheets. 260 00:09:28,736 --> 00:09:31,736 Oh, God, he's...gentle 261 00:09:31,772 --> 00:09:34,012 and strong. 262 00:09:34,041 --> 00:09:36,611 Sometimes he's dark. 263 00:09:36,644 --> 00:09:39,114 He took me to the edge of his balcony once 264 00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:42,716 and he asked, "Are you afraid?" 265 00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:45,650 And I said, "Yes." 266 00:09:45,686 --> 00:09:47,316 And he said, "Good. 267 00:09:47,354 --> 00:09:49,624 That's how I feel with you." 268 00:09:49,657 --> 00:09:51,087 [soft exhales from ladies] 269 00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:53,764 And then we made love. 270 00:09:53,794 --> 00:09:56,064 And then we ate dinner. - Mm... 271 00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:59,896 - And it was fancy. [women exhale, murmur] 272 00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:02,643 He thinks I'm prettier than my sister. 273 00:10:06,974 --> 00:10:08,384 Yeah. 274 00:10:08,408 --> 00:10:10,038 [giggles] 275 00:10:10,077 --> 00:10:11,337 - So when you say the bottom, 276 00:10:11,378 --> 00:10:14,308 you mean the base or, like, the underside? 277 00:10:14,347 --> 00:10:17,717 - Um, I'd have to say, like, just the full underneath. 278 00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:18,791 - Mm-hmm. 279 00:10:18,819 --> 00:10:20,649 - Loose muffin! Loose muffin! 280 00:10:20,688 --> 00:10:23,658 [Wiz Khalifa's "We Dem Boyz" plays] 281 00:10:23,691 --> 00:10:25,691 - * Hol' up, hol' up 282 00:10:25,726 --> 00:10:27,426 * Hol' up, we dem boyz 283 00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:29,330 * We dem boyz 284 00:10:29,362 --> 00:10:31,772 * Hol' up, we dem boyz 285 00:10:31,799 --> 00:10:33,729 * Hol' up, hol' up, hol' up * 286 00:10:33,767 --> 00:10:35,737 * We makin' noise - Ooh! 287 00:10:35,769 --> 00:10:39,339 * Hol' up, we dem boyz 288 00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:40,272 * Hol' up, hol' up... 289 00:10:40,307 --> 00:10:43,677 [overlapping shouting] - Go, go, go, go, go! 290 00:10:43,711 --> 00:10:44,681 - Yeah! 291 00:10:44,712 --> 00:10:46,452 - * Risk it only now 292 00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,449 * Hol' up, hol' up, hol' up...* 293 00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:49,481 - Go ahead, man. Shoot! 294 00:10:49,516 --> 00:10:51,686 You got nothing, bro. Take a shot, I dare you. 295 00:10:51,719 --> 00:10:53,819 - Take it easy, jeez. 296 00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:55,824 - Oh, yeah? What are you gonna do about it? 297 00:10:55,856 --> 00:10:57,156 Call your girlfriend Amy? 298 00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:59,060 - What? No. That's--why would I-- 299 00:10:59,092 --> 00:10:59,962 - Boom! 300 00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:02,103 I'm the muffin man now, bitch! - That's-- 301 00:11:02,129 --> 00:11:04,399 - Hey, Adam. It's Carol. 302 00:11:04,431 --> 00:11:06,201 I had a missed call from an unknown caller. 303 00:11:06,233 --> 00:11:09,373 I thought maybe that was you. [laughs] 304 00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:12,212 Anyways, I'm at lunch with you know who. 305 00:11:12,239 --> 00:11:13,939 [singsong] Awkward! 306 00:11:13,974 --> 00:11:16,414 - Okay, this is gonna sound so naughty, 307 00:11:16,443 --> 00:11:18,083 but should we get another round of drinks? 308 00:11:18,111 --> 00:11:20,381 We shouldn't, should we? 309 00:11:20,413 --> 00:11:22,053 - Nope. We should really get going. 310 00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:24,022 - You're not even trying to have fun. 311 00:11:24,051 --> 00:11:25,851 And Myrtle's not done yet. 312 00:11:25,886 --> 00:11:27,986 - Look, I really appreciate 313 00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:29,391 this gesture, I do. 314 00:11:29,422 --> 00:11:31,222 This was very nice of you, 315 00:11:31,258 --> 00:11:34,228 but this is...terrible. 316 00:11:34,261 --> 00:11:36,931 It's depressing and-- and awkward. 317 00:11:36,964 --> 00:11:39,504 We have nothing to talk about. 318 00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,742 And I know this sounds weird, 319 00:11:41,769 --> 00:11:43,999 but this food smells like bowling. 320 00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:46,167 - Yeah, um... 321 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:47,876 Yeah, I'm sorry this wasn't perfect. 322 00:11:47,908 --> 00:11:49,908 It's actually the first ladies' lunch I've ever thrown. 323 00:11:49,943 --> 00:11:52,783 I don't have a lot of female friends, so, uh-- 324 00:11:52,813 --> 00:11:55,723 Yeah, let's just get going. This was stupid. 325 00:11:56,784 --> 00:11:58,794 - No. We can stay. 326 00:11:58,819 --> 00:12:00,219 - No, it's fine. Forget it, I'll just-- 327 00:12:00,253 --> 00:12:01,963 I'll pay the check. Ron? 328 00:12:01,989 --> 00:12:04,089 - No, no, no. We can stay, Dina. 329 00:12:04,124 --> 00:12:06,034 I want to stay. 330 00:12:12,365 --> 00:12:12,895 all: Whoo! - Bottoms up! 331 00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:15,967 - Salute! 332 00:12:17,971 --> 00:12:20,471 - Ugh! Okay, Cheyenne, 333 00:12:20,507 --> 00:12:23,777 Marcus, Brett, Peter. Go. 334 00:12:23,811 --> 00:12:27,011 - Okay. I would bang Marcus... 335 00:12:27,047 --> 00:12:29,277 - Ugh! - Marry Brett... 336 00:12:29,316 --> 00:12:31,816 and kill Bo's mom. 337 00:12:31,852 --> 00:12:34,422 - No, Cheyenne, she's not an option. 338 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:36,094 That's not the game. - I don't care. 339 00:12:36,123 --> 00:12:37,863 She sucks! 340 00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:40,491 [all laughing] Okay, um, okay. 341 00:12:40,527 --> 00:12:43,397 Glenn, Garrett and Darren. 342 00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:45,800 - Okay, obviously, I'd kill Glenn. 343 00:12:45,833 --> 00:12:48,343 Um, probably just like slit his throat 344 00:12:48,368 --> 00:12:49,868 or tear him limb from limb. 345 00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:51,813 - [giggling] - Uh, then I'd marry Darren, 346 00:12:51,839 --> 00:12:54,409 and I've already [bleep] Garrett, so I guess him again. 347 00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:57,951 [all laughing] 348 00:12:57,978 --> 00:13:00,478 - No. No, no, no, really. I have. 349 00:13:00,513 --> 00:13:04,423 Don't know why we're laughing, because I did. 350 00:13:04,451 --> 00:13:06,351 [laughter increases] 351 00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:10,416 On Black Friday after we all got sick. 352 00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:14,027 I had to erase the security camera footage. 353 00:13:14,061 --> 00:13:17,031 [laughter continues] 354 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,565 - Uh! - E-excuse me! 355 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,070 Where are the paper towels? 356 00:13:22,102 --> 00:13:24,942 - I'm sorry, I don't think we sell those here. 357 00:13:27,074 --> 00:13:29,414 - I got it! I'm going for it! 358 00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:30,982 I'm going for it! 359 00:13:31,011 --> 00:13:33,451 - Not in my store! 360 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:34,450 all: Oh! - Oh, my God! 361 00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:35,521 Glenn. - Oh, my-- 362 00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:37,118 - Oh, my God. Are you okay? 363 00:13:40,453 --> 00:13:43,593 - I can see the whole store from up here. 364 00:13:43,623 --> 00:13:45,033 - Oh, no. 365 00:13:45,058 --> 00:13:47,358 - He's gonna be fine. 366 00:13:47,394 --> 00:13:49,634 [soft pop music plays] 367 00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:52,432 - Excuse me. Can I-- 368 00:13:52,465 --> 00:13:54,425 - Excuse me, sir? 369 00:13:54,467 --> 00:13:56,037 Sir, this lady here, she'd-- - When you have a second. 370 00:13:56,069 --> 00:13:57,139 - Sir? 371 00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,572 - Thanks for trying. [giggles] 372 00:14:00,607 --> 00:14:03,007 - You're welcome. 373 00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:07,153 If you wanna sit here while you wait, you can. 374 00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,550 - Okay. 375 00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:11,482 I'll sit. [laughs] 376 00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:14,448 - So do you think you and Adam will stay together? 377 00:14:14,487 --> 00:14:16,117 - Of course. - Mm-hmm. 378 00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:18,356 - I think. I don't know. I mean-- 379 00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:20,891 Look, Adam and I have been together 380 00:14:20,928 --> 00:14:22,398 a really long time. 381 00:14:22,429 --> 00:14:25,099 And I just wanna know that if we are together 382 00:14:25,132 --> 00:14:28,372 it's because we want to be, and not because 383 00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,171 we're afraid of change. 384 00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:32,613 - Oh, you know, if worse comes to worse, 385 00:14:32,639 --> 00:14:35,139 my cousin knows a divorce lawyer in Little Rock. 386 00:14:35,175 --> 00:14:36,605 Three jet skis in that garage. 387 00:14:36,643 --> 00:14:38,453 You'd be in good hands. 388 00:14:38,478 --> 00:14:39,578 - Thanks. 389 00:14:39,612 --> 00:14:43,222 But I'm not good at change. I-I never change anything. 390 00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:48,220 I've had the same haircut since I was in high school. 391 00:14:48,255 --> 00:14:50,985 - Whoa! - And every now and then 392 00:14:51,024 --> 00:14:54,134 I'm like, maybe I'll change my hair. 393 00:14:54,161 --> 00:14:57,231 And then...I don't. 394 00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:59,034 - [slurping] 395 00:14:59,066 --> 00:15:00,426 I should not be drinking this! 396 00:15:00,467 --> 00:15:03,197 [laughs] I am so out of control! 397 00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:05,036 [chortling] 398 00:15:05,072 --> 00:15:08,142 - Oh. You okay? 399 00:15:08,175 --> 00:15:10,035 - No, I'm--I'm fine. 400 00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:14,677 I just wanna relax here on the beach for a while. 401 00:15:14,714 --> 00:15:15,624 [sighs] 402 00:15:15,648 --> 00:15:17,548 - And since Brett's knee is still injured 403 00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:20,154 from his MMA fight, Jonah will be 404 00:15:20,187 --> 00:15:22,157 taking his place in the final shootout. 405 00:15:22,189 --> 00:15:23,489 [overlapping chatter] 406 00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:26,033 His opponent will be decided by a simple-- 407 00:15:26,059 --> 00:15:27,529 - I'll do it. - Okay. 408 00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:30,060 I wasn't finished talking, but I guess this game 409 00:15:30,097 --> 00:15:31,597 has made monsters out of all of us. 410 00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:34,071 - All right, this is it. 411 00:15:34,101 --> 00:15:35,241 Winner gets Amy. 412 00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:37,538 - You--what--you can't win a person 413 00:15:37,570 --> 00:15:39,510 by throwing a taped up muffin at a bucket. 414 00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:44,039 - Oh, yeah? Then what's this? 415 00:15:44,077 --> 00:15:45,447 Boom! - Yes! 416 00:15:45,478 --> 00:15:49,248 - USA! USA! all: USA! USA! 417 00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:51,222 - We all live here. 418 00:15:51,251 --> 00:15:53,051 - When he confronted the witches, 419 00:15:53,086 --> 00:15:55,056 it really grounded him. 420 00:15:55,088 --> 00:15:57,218 - Exactly. [both laugh] 421 00:15:57,257 --> 00:15:59,727 Does your husband or boyfriend 422 00:15:59,759 --> 00:16:01,589 like "Vampire Diaries" as much as you do? 423 00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:04,098 - Oh, I'm not seeing anyone. 424 00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:06,471 - What about Jeff? 425 00:16:06,499 --> 00:16:09,999 - Who's Jeff? - Her serious boyfriend. 426 00:16:10,037 --> 00:16:11,497 [laughs] 427 00:16:11,538 --> 00:16:16,278 - Oh, right. I do have a boyfriend. 428 00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:20,748 Sorry. 'Scuse me. 429 00:16:24,084 --> 00:16:26,194 - Hi. Carol. 430 00:16:26,219 --> 00:16:30,319 - Oh! I'm gonna get another Long Island iced tea, beyotches! 431 00:16:30,357 --> 00:16:33,227 Whoo! all: Whoo! 432 00:16:33,260 --> 00:16:35,130 - [laughs] 433 00:16:35,162 --> 00:16:36,502 Diet Coke, please. 434 00:16:36,529 --> 00:16:39,099 - It all comes down to this. 435 00:16:39,132 --> 00:16:41,572 They call him the Comeback Kid. 436 00:16:41,601 --> 00:16:45,571 But not a person in this place thinks he can make this shot. 437 00:16:45,605 --> 00:16:49,105 He has absolutely no athletic ability whatsoever. 438 00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:52,052 - Uh, okay. - Never, in the history of sport 439 00:16:52,079 --> 00:16:55,149 has someone less qualified stepped up to the plate. 440 00:16:55,182 --> 00:16:58,222 [dramatic music] 441 00:16:58,251 --> 00:16:59,551 - Oh! 442 00:17:05,292 --> 00:17:08,602 - Ooh! Team USA wins! - Yes! 443 00:17:08,628 --> 00:17:10,628 I win Amy. - No. You don't win Amy! 444 00:17:10,663 --> 00:17:13,573 Nobody wins Amy! You don't get Amy! 445 00:17:16,303 --> 00:17:18,343 - Wait, dude. Are you playing for Amy? 446 00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:19,811 - Uh--no, I-- 447 00:17:19,839 --> 00:17:21,739 - Jonah, she's just in counseling. 448 00:17:21,774 --> 00:17:24,384 It doesn't mean her marriage is over. 449 00:17:24,411 --> 00:17:28,381 - I know that. That's-- that's exactly my-- 450 00:17:28,415 --> 00:17:30,215 Marcus keeps-- 451 00:17:32,685 --> 00:17:36,715 all: * I said la, la, la, la, la * 452 00:17:36,756 --> 00:17:38,686 * La, la, la, la 453 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:42,725 * La, la, la, la la, la, la, la, la, la, la * 454 00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:45,372 - Everybody! all: * La, la, la, la 455 00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,668 * La, la, la, la 456 00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:54,837 - Nah! [laughs] Yah! 457 00:17:56,409 --> 00:17:58,679 - Oh, whoa! [both laughing] 458 00:17:58,711 --> 00:17:59,811 - I can't fall. 459 00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:02,576 - Ow. - Funny. 460 00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:09,557 Something looks different. 461 00:18:11,458 --> 00:18:13,588 - What's up, Ames? 462 00:18:13,626 --> 00:18:15,696 - Um...'sup? 463 00:18:15,728 --> 00:18:19,828 - Hey, uh...keep me posted on things. 464 00:18:19,866 --> 00:18:21,396 - What are you talking about? 465 00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:26,414 - [laughs] Just...whatever. 466 00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:28,509 I'm around. 467 00:18:31,711 --> 00:18:34,681 - Hmm. Did that make sense to you? 468 00:18:34,714 --> 00:18:36,824 - No. 469 00:18:36,849 --> 00:18:38,419 - Good. 470 00:18:55,835 --> 00:18:57,695 - Hello--hello, Glenn. Good mor--afternoon. 471 00:18:57,737 --> 00:18:59,537 Good afternoon to you. 472 00:18:59,572 --> 00:19:04,542 - How far would I have to drive to see a prairie? 473 00:19:04,577 --> 00:19:06,707 - I'm on it. I'll find that out right now. 474 00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:08,546 - Thank you. 475 00:19:08,581 --> 00:19:10,321 - Just in a second. 476 00:19:10,350 --> 00:19:11,550 - Are you okay? 477 00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:13,424 - Uh, yeah. I'm okay. 478 00:19:13,453 --> 00:19:15,893 'Cause I am a professional, so-- 479 00:19:15,922 --> 00:19:17,792 You want me to touch my nose with my finger? 480 00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:18,794 No problem. 481 00:19:18,825 --> 00:19:20,725 Okay? You want me to do the alphabet backwards? 482 00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:24,460 Sure. Z, Y... 483 00:19:27,867 --> 00:19:29,397 X. 484 00:19:29,436 --> 00:19:32,936 - Is, uh--so you might hear 485 00:19:32,972 --> 00:19:35,412 something kinda funny. [laughs] 486 00:19:35,442 --> 00:19:36,682 It's real funny. 487 00:19:36,709 --> 00:19:39,879 Um, to be clear, I don't think I can win you. 488 00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:43,652 I mean--and I wouldn't want to, even if I could. 489 00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:46,423 You know, people. We all win whoever, 490 00:19:46,453 --> 00:19:48,863 together, sexually. 491 00:19:50,490 --> 00:19:54,630 - I can't follow you because you talk so much. 492 00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:56,461 - I'm sorry-- - And--and also, 493 00:19:56,496 --> 00:19:58,726 I'm a little bit drunk. 494 00:19:58,765 --> 00:19:59,965 - I'm sor-- 495 00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:01,769 - [whispers] I'm a little bit drunk. 496 00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:06,741 - Yes...you are so drunk. 497 00:20:06,773 --> 00:20:08,613 - Yes. - Whoo. 498 00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:11,841 - I'm so sorry. You were saying 499 00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:13,478 something about... - I don't--what was I-- 500 00:20:13,513 --> 00:20:14,783 Who cares? - A sexual... 501 00:20:14,814 --> 00:20:17,384 - Oh, oh, Amy. Whoa. That's--okay-- 502 00:20:17,417 --> 00:20:18,847 This is a workplace, okay? 503 00:20:18,885 --> 00:20:20,985 We don't talk like that here. 504 00:20:21,020 --> 00:20:23,760 You should get on home with that kind of talk. 505 00:20:23,790 --> 00:20:27,830 'Cause this--I don't know what this is, but it's wrong. 506 00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:31,600 - * Look, yeah, but don't touch, baby * 507 00:20:31,631 --> 00:20:33,771 - Mmm, mmm, mmm. 508 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,540 - Okay, I think we're done. 509 00:20:38,405 --> 00:20:41,365 What do you think? 510 00:20:41,408 --> 00:20:44,508 - Oh...yeah. 511 00:20:44,544 --> 00:20:46,884 This really, um... 512 00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:48,523 It's--it's subtle. 513 00:20:48,548 --> 00:20:50,918 - Well, I didn't wanna change it up too much. 514 00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:53,490 You know, baby steps, right? 515 00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:56,790 Also, I don't really know what I'm doing yet. 516 00:20:56,823 --> 00:20:58,463 Also, I'm drunk. 517 00:20:58,491 --> 00:21:00,831 - Yeah, no, I-- 518 00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:02,800 I like it, I like it. 519 00:21:02,829 --> 00:21:05,899 - What? Did I cut too much off? 520 00:21:05,932 --> 00:21:07,672 Are you freaking out right now? 521 00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:12,040 - No. No, no. I was just, um-- [clears throat] 522 00:21:12,071 --> 00:21:14,411 I don't know. I was, like, 523 00:21:14,441 --> 00:21:18,811 thinking something more, like, 524 00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:21,775 - [gasps] 525 00:21:21,814 --> 00:21:23,654 - Like this.