1
00:00:05,883 --> 00:00:08,054
_

2
00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:10,046
How's your knee feeling, Joanie?

3
00:00:10,135 --> 00:00:13,469
The doc seemed pretty
confident when he said one week.

4
00:00:13,494 --> 00:00:15,527
But, y-you know, you
got to get out of bed,

5
00:00:15,596 --> 00:00:16,883
put some weight on it. Here.

6
00:00:16,883 --> 00:00:20,725
No. I don't trust that
doctor. He wore jeans.

7
00:00:20,750 --> 00:00:22,120
Hmm.

8
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,456
Wait, don't go. Don't go.

9
00:00:24,710 --> 00:00:27,578
Oh, I'm so bored.

10
00:00:27,603 --> 00:00:29,554
Well, geez, I'd love to hang out,

11
00:00:29,554 --> 00:00:32,327
but, uh, I got an
appointment I cannot break.

12
00:00:32,352 --> 00:00:33,418
With whom?

13
00:00:33,443 --> 00:00:35,710
Whoever they pair me up with.

14
00:00:43,300 --> 00:00:44,967
Hey, Mom-Mom.

15
00:00:45,035 --> 00:00:48,824
Sophia. You came to see
the Mom-Mom you love.

16
00:00:48,824 --> 00:00:50,524
Oh, I'm just delivering a sandwich.

17
00:00:50,593 --> 00:00:55,287
No, no, no. You want to talk
and tell me all your problems.

18
00:00:55,312 --> 00:00:58,365
Perhaps, uh, you're
feeling invisible at school?

19
00:00:58,434 --> 00:01:01,635
No, school's great. I just
got to name our new mascot,

20
00:01:01,704 --> 00:01:04,871
- Inclusive the Rainbow.
- Oh.

21
00:01:04,940 --> 00:01:07,941
I guess I did just get kind
of annoyed with my mom, though.

22
00:01:08,010 --> 00:01:11,378
Oh, wonderful. Tell me,
honey. Sit down, tell me.

23
00:01:11,454 --> 00:01:13,120
I wanted her to play a game,

24
00:01:13,182 --> 00:01:16,116
but she said she's too
exhausted from taking care of you

25
00:01:16,185 --> 00:01:18,096
and listening to all your
complaints and demands.

26
00:01:18,120 --> 00:01:19,353
Hmm. Well, you know,

27
00:01:19,421 --> 00:01:20,854
I gave her 40 years,

28
00:01:20,923 --> 00:01:22,689
and she walked some
toast across the street,

29
00:01:22,758 --> 00:01:23,991
so I guess we're even.

30
00:01:24,059 --> 00:01:26,994
She said you owe her. Later.

31
00:01:27,062 --> 00:01:29,952
Whoa, honey, don't leave me, please.

32
00:01:29,977 --> 00:01:31,981
You know, I can play that game with you.

33
00:01:32,034 --> 00:01:33,034
Really?

34
00:01:34,970 --> 00:01:37,971
I didn't know there was a truth
or dare version of this game.

35
00:01:38,040 --> 00:01:40,073
There's also an X-rated
version of Monopoly.

36
00:01:40,142 --> 00:01:42,712
I found it in Mom and Dad's closet.

37
00:01:42,737 --> 00:01:44,711
Instead of a car, there were handcuffs.

38
00:01:44,780 --> 00:01:46,340
Instead of a thimble, there was some...

39
00:01:46,382 --> 00:01:48,827
Um, no, honey. I-I
understand what you mean.

40
00:01:48,852 --> 00:01:52,066
Okay, so, "Dare one player
to run around the room."

41
00:01:52,091 --> 00:01:53,490
I dare you.

42
00:01:53,515 --> 00:01:56,538
Run? Get a grip. I can't even walk.

43
00:01:56,563 --> 00:01:58,370
Then I dare you to prank call someone.

44
00:01:58,394 --> 00:01:59,660
I don't know, not with me.

45
00:01:59,728 --> 00:02:01,895
I'm not funny that way.

46
00:02:02,708 --> 00:02:04,831
Seymour Butts doesn't live here.

47
00:02:04,900 --> 00:02:06,433
Okay? Who is this?

48
00:02:06,502 --> 00:02:08,598
You know what? You are
a little piece of...

49
00:02:08,623 --> 00:02:10,349
Oh, mercy.

50
00:02:10,576 --> 00:02:12,439
Oh, that was upsetting.

51
00:02:12,597 --> 00:02:14,796
- I'm gonna go get some more games.
- What?

52
00:02:14,821 --> 00:02:18,289
I love having a broken Mom-Mom
who can't leave her bed.

53
00:02:21,690 --> 00:02:22,907
One...

54
00:02:22,932 --> 00:02:24,292
two...

55
00:02:24,317 --> 00:02:26,286
Oh, phew.

56
00:02:28,924 --> 00:02:32,292
Four? That's too many.

57
00:02:35,652 --> 00:02:36,730
Can we get out yet?

58
00:02:36,799 --> 00:02:38,532
I'm a little starved for air.

59
00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:41,259
We all are. It's a nuclear holocaust.

60
00:02:41,284 --> 00:02:43,006
Mm, right. But I...

61
00:02:43,381 --> 00:02:45,405
Are you crazy?

62
00:02:45,474 --> 00:02:47,107
Mom-Mom, it isn't safe.

63
00:02:47,176 --> 00:02:48,875
Get back in the fort now.

64
00:02:49,639 --> 00:02:51,239
Wake up, Mom-Mom.

65
00:02:51,873 --> 00:02:53,151
What's happening?

66
00:02:53,176 --> 00:02:55,010
I'm the wicked stepmother.

67
00:02:55,312 --> 00:02:57,513
You're gonna have to eat your way out.

68
00:02:58,053 --> 00:02:59,553
- Hey, Mom.
- Ooh.

69
00:02:59,621 --> 00:03:01,888
A visitor. I'm up here!

70
00:03:01,957 --> 00:03:04,224
Shh. You need your rest.

71
00:03:04,643 --> 00:03:07,077
- I'll take care of it.
- Honey?

72
00:03:08,831 --> 00:03:11,465
Oh! Hey, uh, Soph.
Th-This is for Mom-Mom.

73
00:03:11,533 --> 00:03:14,485
Oh, okay. She's not
taking visitors right now.

74
00:03:14,510 --> 00:03:15,408
She's resting.

75
00:03:15,433 --> 00:03:18,105
Uh, somebody's out
there. I can hear you.

76
00:03:18,173 --> 00:03:19,740
Hello?

77
00:03:22,173 --> 00:03:24,407
Did you call Uncle Greg?

78
00:03:24,729 --> 00:03:26,480
No, I didn't.

79
00:03:26,734 --> 00:03:28,634
I'll just hold onto this.

80
00:03:29,057 --> 00:03:30,748
Anything you need, I'll get you.

81
00:03:30,773 --> 00:03:32,696
Well, would you untie me, please?

82
00:03:32,721 --> 00:03:36,789
No. I've got other plans for you.

83
00:03:37,726 --> 00:03:39,553
We're gonna smash geodes.

84
00:03:39,578 --> 00:03:43,107
No, we're not. I have
had enough of this.

85
00:03:43,132 --> 00:03:45,578
Just untie me!

86
00:03:46,254 --> 00:03:49,171
I thought we were having fun together.

87
00:03:50,273 --> 00:03:52,056
Oh, darling.

88
00:03:52,343 --> 00:03:54,304
I didn't want to do that.

89
00:03:54,499 --> 00:03:55,942
I'm so sorry.

90
00:03:55,967 --> 00:04:00,038
You've been just so... you've
been so wonderful to me.

91
00:04:00,271 --> 00:04:02,882
Honey, I'm so sorry.

92
00:04:02,907 --> 00:04:04,146
I'll tell you what.

93
00:04:04,171 --> 00:04:05,737
You know, you go home,

94
00:04:05,762 --> 00:04:08,963
and you just get us
some more games, okay?

95
00:04:09,032 --> 00:04:10,298
I've got a really fun one

96
00:04:10,323 --> 00:04:13,267
where the loser gets
their fingers electrocuted.

97
00:04:13,570 --> 00:04:14,969
Brilliant.

98
00:04:36,960 --> 00:04:39,143
Mom-Mom, you're walking?

99
00:04:39,168 --> 00:04:41,128
Now we can play Twister.

100
00:04:43,886 --> 00:04:45,643
_

101
00:04:45,902 --> 00:04:47,880
So, we were thinking of
having the whole family over

102
00:04:47,904 --> 00:04:50,605
to our house, uh, to meet
our birth mother, Morgan.

103
00:04:50,673 --> 00:04:52,033
She's coming to live with us

104
00:04:52,058 --> 00:04:54,092
to ride out the rest of her pregnancy.

105
00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:56,994
So, when do we get to
meet this baby mule?

106
00:04:57,063 --> 00:04:59,530
Friday. And, um,
that's the type of thing

107
00:04:59,599 --> 00:05:01,265
that you can't call her,

108
00:05:01,334 --> 00:05:04,335
because she might change her
mind about giving us her baby.

109
00:05:04,404 --> 00:05:05,811
- Oh.
- Honey, that's the best version

110
00:05:05,835 --> 00:05:07,763
of what he was going to say.

111
00:05:11,077 --> 00:05:12,490
To dear Morgan.

112
00:05:12,515 --> 00:05:15,980
We're so honored that
you've chosen our family

113
00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:18,616
to give this precious gift to.

114
00:05:18,685 --> 00:05:21,152
- And Colleen and Matt...
- Hello? Hey.

115
00:05:21,221 --> 00:05:23,216
Hey, you can keep talking. It's fine.

116
00:05:23,241 --> 00:05:24,560
Oh, well...

117
00:05:24,585 --> 00:05:26,029
I'm so glad
you called. I'm, like,

118
00:05:26,053 --> 00:05:28,860
literally having the
most awkward conversation

119
00:05:28,928 --> 00:05:30,328
with this old lady right now.

120
00:05:30,396 --> 00:05:32,363
I don't know. Like, old. Like, 50?

121
00:05:32,465 --> 00:05:33,898
You know what, this might be, like,

122
00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:35,299
a dying words type of thing,

123
00:05:35,368 --> 00:05:36,579
so I'm gonna call you back later.

124
00:05:36,603 --> 00:05:38,469
Okay, bye. Go on.

125
00:05:40,401 --> 00:05:43,235
- Beautiful toast, Mom.
- Thank you so much.

126
00:05:45,938 --> 00:05:47,548
Oh, God.

127
00:05:47,573 --> 00:05:50,306
This party blows. We
should totally ditch.

128
00:05:50,383 --> 00:05:52,049
I don't even know anyone here.

129
00:05:52,118 --> 00:05:54,051
I think that's kind of the point.

130
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:55,353
Thanks, professor.

131
00:05:55,421 --> 00:05:56,942
But you know what, I did find one person

132
00:05:56,966 --> 00:05:59,023
that I kind of connected with.

133
00:05:59,092 --> 00:06:01,559
Yeah, my husband is already connected.

134
00:06:01,584 --> 00:06:03,965
Clem, stop. It's not
a good color on you.

135
00:06:04,451 --> 00:06:08,098
You know what'd be a
good color on me? Red.

136
00:06:09,975 --> 00:06:11,775
She is not even my type.

137
00:06:13,063 --> 00:06:16,297
You know what?
You two look like twins.

138
00:06:20,079 --> 00:06:24,282
Being pregnant is the worst,
but it's also kind of the best.

139
00:06:24,350 --> 00:06:26,478
Right? Now I can eat what I want,

140
00:06:26,503 --> 00:06:28,186
and I got to drop out of high school,

141
00:06:28,262 --> 00:06:29,832
and all my sex is safe.

142
00:06:29,857 --> 00:06:31,269
Well, for the next couple months.

143
00:06:31,324 --> 00:06:32,790
Yeah. Uh...

144
00:06:32,859 --> 00:06:34,246
Oh. Okay.

145
00:06:34,271 --> 00:06:37,061
I was gonna go, but then she did.

146
00:06:37,130 --> 00:06:38,563
So...

147
00:06:38,631 --> 00:06:40,198
I feel like I can still go.

148
00:06:40,266 --> 00:06:41,866
Yeah, you can go.

149
00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:43,467
Bitch.

150
00:06:45,169 --> 00:06:46,855
Morgan is a nightmare.

151
00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:48,372
She can't talk to my family this way.

152
00:06:48,397 --> 00:06:49,263
I need to say something.

153
00:06:49,288 --> 00:06:50,875
No, no, no. No, don't you dare.

154
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:52,743
We can't afford to lose her, Matt.

155
00:06:52,812 --> 00:06:54,423
Besides, if she's not
attacking your family,

156
00:06:54,447 --> 00:06:55,991
she's attacking us, and I need a break.

157
00:06:56,015 --> 00:06:57,448
Honey, she told Greg she could tell

158
00:06:57,517 --> 00:06:58,861
his hair is dried with a hairdryer,

159
00:06:58,885 --> 00:07:00,331
and that's not something
that he wants out.

160
00:07:00,355 --> 00:07:01,564
Well, what do you care?

161
00:07:01,589 --> 00:07:03,533
You've been wanting to
expose that for years.

162
00:07:03,558 --> 00:07:06,313
Yes, in a slow, like,
organized social media rollout

163
00:07:06,338 --> 00:07:07,811
- that I control. That I control.
- Well,

164
00:07:07,835 --> 00:07:10,360
you don't control her, Matt.
You don't control anything.

165
00:07:10,385 --> 00:07:12,552
Haven't the last two
years taught you that?

166
00:07:15,759 --> 00:07:17,642
- What are you all doing in here?
- Shh!

167
00:07:17,666 --> 00:07:20,514
We're hiding
from Morgan. Shut the door.

168
00:07:21,277 --> 00:07:24,312
If you actually have to use the
bathroom, use the kitchen sink.

169
00:07:25,419 --> 00:07:27,686
Well, it's just never easy

170
00:07:27,754 --> 00:07:30,021
the first time you're called a bitch.

171
00:07:30,090 --> 00:07:32,124
Uh, wait, what happened?

172
00:07:32,192 --> 00:07:34,292
Did Morgan call you the B-word?

173
00:07:34,361 --> 00:07:35,361
Mm-hmm.

174
00:07:36,530 --> 00:07:38,363
I guess I always knew it was coming.

175
00:07:38,432 --> 00:07:40,298
I just thought I had a couple more years

176
00:07:40,367 --> 00:07:41,833
to be a kid, you know?

177
00:07:43,145 --> 00:07:44,369
I'm just gonna go sit around

178
00:07:44,438 --> 00:07:46,705
and wait for my period.

179
00:07:46,773 --> 00:07:48,562
Aw.

180
00:07:50,144 --> 00:07:51,951
You all should be at the party,

181
00:07:51,976 --> 00:07:53,812
you know, supporting Matt and Colleen.

182
00:07:53,881 --> 00:07:55,213
We support them in theory.

183
00:07:55,282 --> 00:07:57,682
But, in practice, we don't want to.

184
00:07:57,751 --> 00:07:59,251
Yeah, Morgan's so mean.

185
00:07:59,319 --> 00:08:01,086
If Tim heard the things
she said about him,

186
00:08:01,155 --> 00:08:02,921
he'd drive his car
straight into the ocean.

187
00:08:02,990 --> 00:08:05,423
Was it about my weight?
Ha-ha. Very original.

188
00:08:05,492 --> 00:08:07,859
No, it wasn't about your weight.

189
00:08:08,205 --> 00:08:10,529
Oh, no.

190
00:08:10,597 --> 00:08:12,264
Oh, babe, no. That's potpourri, honey.

191
00:08:12,332 --> 00:08:14,260
- I don't even care.
- Listen up.

192
00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:16,735
We got to support Matt and Colleen.

193
00:08:16,803 --> 00:08:19,070
I mean, th-they're looking
like exhausted parents

194
00:08:19,139 --> 00:08:21,339
and they don't even have a kid yet.

195
00:08:21,364 --> 00:08:22,941
Yeah, Morgan called them gunty,

196
00:08:23,010 --> 00:08:24,776
which cannot be good.

197
00:08:24,845 --> 00:08:27,712
That is not nearly as bad
as what she said about Tim.

198
00:08:27,781 --> 00:08:29,114
Come after the dome?

199
00:08:29,183 --> 00:08:30,615
Oh, very clever.

200
00:08:30,684 --> 00:08:32,050
No.

201
00:08:32,119 --> 00:08:33,451
Oh, no.

202
00:08:33,754 --> 00:08:35,362
We got six weeks

203
00:08:35,387 --> 00:08:36,815
and they'll get that baby.

204
00:08:36,840 --> 00:08:38,205
In the meantime,

205
00:08:38,230 --> 00:08:40,597
you all got to put up
with that turd's crap.

206
00:08:41,919 --> 00:08:43,485
Wait.

207
00:08:45,872 --> 00:08:48,039
So it's believable.

208
00:08:50,804 --> 00:08:52,737
There is no excuse
for Morgan's behavior.

209
00:08:52,806 --> 00:08:54,539
We can't put your family through this.

210
00:08:54,608 --> 00:08:57,108
No. So, our options are,

211
00:08:57,177 --> 00:09:01,023
uh, either we confront her
and risk losing the baby...

212
00:09:02,115 --> 00:09:04,357
or we just put our heads down

213
00:09:04,382 --> 00:09:05,984
and we deal with it.

214
00:09:07,437 --> 00:09:09,203
She's our problem.

215
00:09:09,515 --> 00:09:11,723
Let's go tell your family they can go.

216
00:09:11,792 --> 00:09:14,059
Hey, guys, uh, we need to talk.

217
00:09:14,127 --> 00:09:16,394
So, Morgan, maybe you and Sam

218
00:09:16,463 --> 00:09:18,964
should go to the movies next weekend.

219
00:09:19,032 --> 00:09:20,672
Sounds fun.

220
00:09:20,701 --> 00:09:23,380
Uh, yeah. And, uh, next week,

221
00:09:23,405 --> 00:09:25,014
Jen and I can take you to the beach.

222
00:09:25,038 --> 00:09:26,605
- Love it.
- Oh, my gosh.

223
00:09:26,673 --> 00:09:29,341
I'm gonna dig holes and then
put towels over them.

224
00:09:29,409 --> 00:09:31,166
Cool. Like to hurt people.

225
00:09:31,191 --> 00:09:32,120
Yeah, you got it.

226
00:09:32,145 --> 00:09:33,135
You guys,

227
00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:35,313
your family is so dope.

228
00:09:35,382 --> 00:09:37,182
Oh, wait. Hang on.

229
00:09:37,251 --> 00:09:38,817
Don't worry, she didn't die. It's fine.

230
00:09:38,885 --> 00:09:40,485
I know. I know.

231
00:09:40,554 --> 00:09:41,874
Guys, what's going on? We thought

232
00:09:41,922 --> 00:09:43,466
you were all hiding
in the bathroom because

233
00:09:43,490 --> 00:09:44,500
you couldn't stand Morgan.

234
00:09:44,524 --> 00:09:46,191
We can't stand Morgan.

235
00:09:46,260 --> 00:09:48,025
But we love you.

236
00:09:48,050 --> 00:09:50,295
And, you know, it's much
easier to swallow a turd

237
00:09:50,364 --> 00:09:52,497
if you break it up into little pieces.

238
00:09:52,566 --> 00:09:53,566
Aw.

239
00:09:53,634 --> 00:09:55,300
That's, like, a famous quote, right?

240
00:09:55,369 --> 00:09:57,535
Yeah, I think it's Shakespeare.

241
00:10:02,430 --> 00:10:04,233
_

242
00:10:04,945 --> 00:10:07,571
I can't believe you found
one of these bad boys.

243
00:10:07,639 --> 00:10:09,281
I thought they were sold out everywhere.

244
00:10:09,306 --> 00:10:12,115
No, I had to go to the store right
before it opened and then outrun

245
00:10:12,144 --> 00:10:14,022
a woman who was eight and
a half months pregnant.

246
00:10:14,046 --> 00:10:16,195
And when I couldn't do that,
I had to pay her 100 bucks.

247
00:10:16,219 --> 00:10:18,248
Well, worth it. You
know what they say...

248
00:10:18,273 --> 00:10:21,397
the more money we spend,
the better parents we are.

249
00:10:21,422 --> 00:10:22,855
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

250
00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:25,422
Baby Alex is gonna love it.

251
00:10:25,782 --> 00:10:27,114
Alex?

252
00:10:27,139 --> 00:10:28,325
I don't know. I just...

253
00:10:28,394 --> 00:10:30,093
I keep coming back
to it for some reason.

254
00:10:30,162 --> 00:10:31,806
- Like, I think it's such a cute name.
- Mm.

255
00:10:31,830 --> 00:10:33,830
And, also, it works for a boy or a girl.

256
00:10:33,899 --> 00:10:36,933
So, do you like it?

257
00:10:37,002 --> 00:10:38,335
I love it.

258
00:10:38,404 --> 00:10:39,536
Let's do it.

259
00:10:39,605 --> 00:10:41,104
Mwah.

260
00:10:41,173 --> 00:10:42,925
And, honey, this time,
we have to keep it

261
00:10:42,950 --> 00:10:44,891
- from your family until I have this baby.
- Mm.

262
00:10:44,916 --> 00:10:46,530
Yeah, no one has the
guts to criticize a name

263
00:10:46,554 --> 00:10:48,287
once it's attached to a human.

264
00:10:49,136 --> 00:10:52,243
There are my pregnant sons.

265
00:10:52,268 --> 00:10:54,793
I have a patient who's a woodworker.

266
00:10:54,862 --> 00:10:58,970
He's also an arsonist, but
woodworking is his real passion.

267
00:10:58,995 --> 00:11:01,634
What do you think about rocking chairs

268
00:11:01,659 --> 00:11:04,303
to lull your little angels to sleep?

269
00:11:04,371 --> 00:11:06,171
- Aw.
- Oh...

270
00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:09,808
Thanks, Mom. But, yeah, we
don't really need one of those.

271
00:11:09,877 --> 00:11:12,311
Yeah, we just got this hot new bassinet

272
00:11:12,379 --> 00:11:13,812
that everyone's talking about.

273
00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:16,292
I mean, you probably
saw the article, right?

274
00:11:16,317 --> 00:11:17,717
Parents magazine?

275
00:11:18,058 --> 00:11:19,257
No?

276
00:11:19,753 --> 00:11:21,186
I'd love a rocking chair.

277
00:11:21,255 --> 00:11:22,955
We don't have any nursery furniture yet.

278
00:11:23,023 --> 00:11:26,855
Oh, honey, I wanted
these gifts to match.

279
00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:29,862
I'll ask him to do something,
you know, simple yet elegant.

280
00:11:29,930 --> 00:11:31,463
Like a stool.

281
00:11:31,532 --> 00:11:33,521
Who doesn't love a simple stool?

282
00:11:33,546 --> 00:11:35,078
Yeah! I mean, why get a rocking chair

283
00:11:35,102 --> 00:11:36,580
when you can have a stool? Thanks, Greg.

284
00:11:37,771 --> 00:11:39,872
We have so many stools.

285
00:11:39,940 --> 00:11:41,640
Uh, can it be anything smaller,

286
00:11:41,709 --> 00:11:43,976
like a... like a baby
rattle or a wooden spoon?

287
00:11:44,044 --> 00:11:45,177
Are you kidding me?

288
00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:46,911
Ooh, a spoon!

289
00:11:46,936 --> 00:11:48,636
Like an heirloom!

290
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:51,486
And I'll ask him to engrave it. Oh!

291
00:11:51,511 --> 00:11:53,385
Well, what are the babies' names?

292
00:11:53,454 --> 00:11:55,432
- Oh, we were thinking about naming...
- Uh, we-we were both,

293
00:11:55,456 --> 00:11:58,603
uh, thinking that we'd
like to surprise the family

294
00:11:58,628 --> 00:12:00,169
with our names.

295
00:12:00,194 --> 00:12:02,861
Well, I'll tell Gene to
wait on the engraving.

296
00:12:02,930 --> 00:12:05,127
Oh, my gosh. Yikes.

297
00:12:05,152 --> 00:12:07,633
Please forget I said my
patient's name was Gene.

298
00:12:07,701 --> 00:12:08,734
Oh, it's terrible.

299
00:12:08,802 --> 00:12:10,855
It really is terrible.

300
00:12:11,877 --> 00:12:13,643
Hey, sorry I had to jump in there.

301
00:12:13,668 --> 00:12:15,507
You do not want to let anyone know

302
00:12:15,576 --> 00:12:17,576
the name you've chosen
until the baby is born.

303
00:12:17,636 --> 00:12:19,266
They'll crap all over it.

304
00:12:19,291 --> 00:12:20,548
Oh, man. I'm not even worried about it.

305
00:12:20,572 --> 00:12:22,347
You can't ruin a great name like Alex.

306
00:12:22,416 --> 00:12:25,053
Oh, uh, uh, what, Alex?

307
00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:27,219
Wait, did Jen tell you our name?

308
00:12:27,288 --> 00:12:29,367
No. Alex is the name we picked.

309
00:12:29,515 --> 00:12:32,891
No, Alex is the name that we picked.

310
00:12:33,178 --> 00:12:34,444
But you can't.

311
00:12:34,659 --> 00:12:36,695
Well, we're gonna have a baby first.

312
00:12:37,079 --> 00:12:38,712
No, you're not.

313
00:12:38,737 --> 00:12:41,366
Well, we named our baby first.

314
00:12:41,435 --> 00:12:42,435
No, you didn't.

315
00:12:42,503 --> 00:12:44,836
Well, we'll tell the family first.

316
00:12:44,905 --> 00:12:47,573
No, you won't.

317
00:12:48,676 --> 00:12:49,608
What?

318
00:12:49,677 --> 00:12:51,209
No.

319
00:12:53,147 --> 00:12:54,079
Oh, my God.

320
00:12:54,148 --> 00:12:55,380
We're naming our baby Alex.

321
00:12:57,284 --> 00:12:58,437
Alex!

322
00:12:58,462 --> 00:12:59,695
You heard!

323
00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:02,097
- What a perfect name!
- Mm.

324
00:13:02,122 --> 00:13:03,789
I'll go tell Mr. Lewis.

325
00:13:03,857 --> 00:13:05,223
Oh, damn it.

326
00:13:05,292 --> 00:13:07,414
Now you know my patient's last name.

327
00:13:11,765 --> 00:13:12,965
Okay.

328
00:13:13,033 --> 00:13:14,898
You screwed up. That's obvious.

329
00:13:14,923 --> 00:13:15,979
I don't need to know the details.

330
00:13:16,003 --> 00:13:17,869
I just need you to go get the name back.

331
00:13:17,938 --> 00:13:19,955
No problem.

332
00:13:20,608 --> 00:13:21,740
How?

333
00:13:21,809 --> 00:13:23,241
I'm gonna cut to the chase, Greg.

334
00:13:23,310 --> 00:13:24,521
You've lived in your brother's shadow

335
00:13:24,545 --> 00:13:25,711
for a long time.

336
00:13:25,779 --> 00:13:26,945
Well, not really.

337
00:13:26,970 --> 00:13:28,458
I'm, like, five inches taller than him.

338
00:13:28,482 --> 00:13:30,082
And I'm gonna need you to go out there

339
00:13:30,150 --> 00:13:32,356
and swing that five inches around.

340
00:13:32,381 --> 00:13:35,567
You know, really show
your brother who's boss.

341
00:13:35,592 --> 00:13:37,092
Greg.

342
00:13:40,311 --> 00:13:42,348
Hey, man. Things got a
little heavy back there,

343
00:13:42,373 --> 00:13:44,663
- but this is a time for celebration.
- Mm.

344
00:13:44,732 --> 00:13:45,809
- Mm.
- You know? I mean, we should

345
00:13:45,833 --> 00:13:47,766
be helping each other on this, uh, uh,

346
00:13:47,835 --> 00:13:49,901
crazy journey called
parenthood, you know?

347
00:13:49,970 --> 00:13:51,103
Couldn't agree more.

348
00:13:51,171 --> 00:13:53,105
You have something that I want.

349
00:13:53,173 --> 00:13:57,576
- Mm.
- But I might have something you want.

350
00:13:57,645 --> 00:13:58,889
I'm listening.

351
00:14:02,780 --> 00:14:04,349
This says "Jarvis."

352
00:14:04,418 --> 00:14:08,161
Now that is our backup
name, real primo. Choice.

353
00:14:08,186 --> 00:14:09,855
God, it kills me to be giving this up,

354
00:14:09,923 --> 00:14:11,523
but it's yours if you want it.

355
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:13,949
Seriously?

356
00:14:14,577 --> 00:14:16,762
Matthew, please. I'm desperate.

357
00:14:22,419 --> 00:14:23,502
Got the name back.

358
00:14:23,527 --> 00:14:25,014
Yes!

359
00:14:25,039 --> 00:14:27,506
Oh. I never once doubted you out loud.

360
00:14:28,659 --> 00:14:32,057
Hey. So, uh, we'll pick
up the bassinet tomorrow?

361
00:14:32,807 --> 00:14:34,516
You'll pick up the what now?

362
00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:36,548
There are a million
baby names out there,

363
00:14:36,617 --> 00:14:39,711
- but only one of these bassinets in town.
- Mm.

364
00:14:40,109 --> 00:14:41,787
You gave 'em our bassinet?

365
00:14:41,812 --> 00:14:43,021
And two stools.

366
00:14:43,046 --> 00:14:44,489
We hear you're swimming in stools.

367
00:14:46,226 --> 00:14:47,367
You know what?

368
00:14:47,392 --> 00:14:49,968
At least everybody
already loves the name.

369
00:14:52,099 --> 00:14:54,194
We're naming our baby Alex.

370
00:14:54,219 --> 00:14:57,194
Joanie, I swear I've
lived this moment before.

371
00:14:57,219 --> 00:14:59,838
I thought that was Uncle
Matt and Aunt Colleen's name?

372
00:14:59,907 --> 00:15:01,640
Yeah, but the important thing is that

373
00:15:01,709 --> 00:15:04,777
the beloved family-sanctioned
name is now ours.

374
00:15:04,802 --> 00:15:06,894
Oh, I don't know.

375
00:15:06,919 --> 00:15:10,754
You know, I liked Alex by
itself, but Alex and Lark?

376
00:15:10,779 --> 00:15:12,851
It sounds like two
little beagle puppies,

377
00:15:12,920 --> 00:15:16,131
and one's fast, and the
other drowns in the river.

378
00:15:16,156 --> 00:15:17,389
- Huh.
- Oh.

379
00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:19,615
I knew an Alex. He killed a Mark.

380
00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:20,892
It's pretty close to Lark.

381
00:15:20,961 --> 00:15:23,862
What other names are you kicking around?

382
00:15:23,931 --> 00:15:26,023
If you guys don't want
Alex anymore, we'll take it.

383
00:15:26,048 --> 00:15:27,866
Alex Short. I like that.

384
00:15:27,935 --> 00:15:29,395
Oh, hell no.

385
00:15:45,476 --> 00:15:47,329
_

386
00:15:48,935 --> 00:15:50,868
All right, hustle back!

387
00:15:55,294 --> 00:15:57,591
- Hey!
- Mom, I think we should go home.

388
00:15:57,631 --> 00:15:58,769
I don't feel good.

389
00:15:58,794 --> 00:16:00,840
- Mm. Yeah.
- And I feel like it's something bad.

390
00:16:00,865 --> 00:16:02,597
I'm pretty sure it's my prostate.

391
00:16:02,622 --> 00:16:05,621
Pro-Probably. Let me
give you one of these.

392
00:16:05,646 --> 00:16:07,312
There you go, sweetie.

393
00:16:08,591 --> 00:16:10,739
Yeah, right?

394
00:16:11,474 --> 00:16:13,608
Um... what did you just give her?

395
00:16:13,945 --> 00:16:16,420
Oh, this isn't real medication.

396
00:16:16,445 --> 00:16:18,685
When Sophia says that she's sick

397
00:16:18,710 --> 00:16:20,594
but I think she's probably
just a little anxious,

398
00:16:20,618 --> 00:16:22,303
I give her a candy from a pill bottle,

399
00:16:22,328 --> 00:16:23,694
then she thinks she feels better.

400
00:16:23,763 --> 00:16:25,563
Jump ball!

401
00:16:27,422 --> 00:16:29,092
- Yeah!
- That's genius!

402
00:16:29,117 --> 00:16:30,783
Yeah, it's good.

403
00:16:30,837 --> 00:16:34,134
You could make a fortune
selling those to my family alone.

404
00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:36,793
Yeah. Here you go.

405
00:16:36,818 --> 00:16:39,541
- First one's free.
- Hmm.

406
00:16:41,925 --> 00:16:44,579
- What's all this?
- Oh! Tim, it's so exciting.

407
00:16:44,604 --> 00:16:46,717
You know how I always give
the kids those fake pills?

408
00:16:46,742 --> 00:16:48,534
Well, word spread around
the basketball moms,

409
00:16:48,534 --> 00:16:49,933
and now I'm selling 'em.

410
00:16:49,958 --> 00:16:51,312
Oh, that's amazing.

411
00:16:51,381 --> 00:16:53,481
I call them, "Feel-Betters."

412
00:16:53,550 --> 00:16:55,016
- Oh, that's good.
- Yeah.

413
00:16:55,084 --> 00:16:57,952
Yeah, makes you think
you'll feel better.

414
00:16:58,244 --> 00:17:00,048
Where'd you get all the bottles?

415
00:17:00,073 --> 00:17:03,161
Remember when I was asked to step down

416
00:17:03,186 --> 00:17:04,575
from the school gala committee,

417
00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:05,960
and then I had that little moment?

418
00:17:06,029 --> 00:17:07,795
Five months was a little moment?

419
00:17:07,864 --> 00:17:09,208
Well, I saved all my pill bottles.

420
00:17:09,232 --> 00:17:10,831
Well, look at you.

421
00:17:10,900 --> 00:17:13,584
Took real human darkness, turned
it into a fun business idea.

422
00:17:13,609 --> 00:17:14,468
Good for you.

423
00:17:14,531 --> 00:17:16,370
I know. Isn't it amazing?

424
00:17:16,439 --> 00:17:20,429
Oh, Tim, I feel like this
is how Amazon started.

425
00:17:21,411 --> 00:17:22,946
Probably.

426
00:17:25,448 --> 00:17:27,682
Oh, no, it feels so good
to have my own business.

427
00:17:27,750 --> 00:17:29,804
And you know the best part about this is

428
00:17:29,804 --> 00:17:32,771
that I'm doing everything all by myself.

429
00:17:34,108 --> 00:17:36,012
All right, guys, how we doing?

430
00:17:36,037 --> 00:17:37,745
- Mmm.
- Um, Tim, honey?

431
00:17:37,770 --> 00:17:39,792
Yeah, not paying you to eat the product.

432
00:17:39,817 --> 00:17:41,503
You're not paying us at all.

433
00:17:41,528 --> 00:17:44,002
Well, why would I? You
are terrible at your job.

434
00:17:44,070 --> 00:17:46,004
I have a job. I'm a doctor.

435
00:17:46,072 --> 00:17:49,417
Yeah? Well, here, you are
just a hot piece of ass.

436
00:17:49,442 --> 00:17:50,741
Aah!

437
00:17:51,778 --> 00:17:54,086
Mommy, Mommy, Mommy!

438
00:17:54,414 --> 00:17:56,781
Aunt Heather brought Soph to play group!

439
00:17:56,850 --> 00:17:58,549
- Hi, guys.
- Oh!

440
00:17:58,618 --> 00:18:02,186
I just came to drop off
these toys of Sophia's.

441
00:18:02,255 --> 00:18:04,622
- Oh, wow. Thank you. That's so sweet.
- Oh. Yeah.

442
00:18:04,691 --> 00:18:07,861
It's, uh... six Legos

443
00:18:07,886 --> 00:18:10,461
- and half a doll with her hair ripped out.
- Mm-hmm.

444
00:18:10,530 --> 00:18:12,595
I mean, Sophia doesn't
need that stuff anymore,

445
00:18:12,620 --> 00:18:15,375
now that she's in the sixth grade.

446
00:18:15,400 --> 00:18:17,767
Well, I may be a big girl,

447
00:18:17,792 --> 00:18:20,681
but sometimes I get
little-girl feelings.

448
00:18:20,706 --> 00:18:22,407
I get nervous and anxious

449
00:18:22,475 --> 00:18:25,076
and sometimes even a little scared.

450
00:18:25,145 --> 00:18:26,577
Yeah, and as a

451
00:18:26,602 --> 00:18:27,979
caring mom on the go,

452
00:18:28,004 --> 00:18:29,670
I know exactly what you need.

453
00:18:30,225 --> 00:18:31,457
Feel-Betters.

454
00:18:31,482 --> 00:18:33,685
- What is happening?
- What are Feel-Betters?

455
00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:36,721
They're my favorite organic,
farm-to-table medicine.

456
00:18:36,790 --> 00:18:38,256
Yeah, here you go, sweetie.

457
00:18:38,324 --> 00:18:39,924
- Thanks, Mom.
- Yeah.

458
00:18:39,949 --> 00:18:41,884
It's just a placebo,

459
00:18:41,909 --> 00:18:44,572
But
it's the magical medicine

460
00:18:44,597 --> 00:18:48,199
that takes her tummy from owie to wowie.

461
00:18:48,224 --> 00:18:51,102
I feel so much better, and confident.

462
00:18:51,171 --> 00:18:52,837
Like, if my parents were divorced,

463
00:18:52,906 --> 00:18:54,772
I wouldn't feel any stress about it.

464
00:18:54,841 --> 00:18:56,641
Can I get some of those?

465
00:18:56,882 --> 00:18:58,154
Bill just left us.

466
00:18:58,179 --> 00:19:00,778
Oh, my God. Claire, are you okay?

467
00:19:00,814 --> 00:19:03,755
She will be, because I've got
ten bottles of Feel-Betters

468
00:19:03,780 --> 00:19:05,598
right in my purse for $9.99.

469
00:19:05,623 --> 00:19:07,590
Of course you do.

470
00:19:07,986 --> 00:19:10,014
That was a nice performance, Soph.

471
00:19:27,216 --> 00:19:30,684
Hey, can I talk to you guys
about your, uh, Feel-Betters?

472
00:19:30,753 --> 00:19:32,620
Oh, yeah. Jen, I'm sorry.

473
00:19:32,688 --> 00:19:34,303
I can't shave anything off the price

474
00:19:34,328 --> 00:19:35,661
just because you're family.

475
00:19:36,215 --> 00:19:38,859
Uh, listen, as a
lawyer, I should warn you

476
00:19:38,928 --> 00:19:41,061
that selling anything even
remotely close to medicine

477
00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:45,035
just opens you up to a
host of legal landmines.

478
00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:46,133
Good ones?

479
00:19:46,202 --> 00:19:48,551
No. No.

480
00:19:48,576 --> 00:19:50,756
You're encouraging kids

481
00:19:50,781 --> 00:19:52,834
to take a pill every time they feel bad.

482
00:19:52,859 --> 00:19:55,360
I mean, what happens
when a kid pops a handful

483
00:19:55,385 --> 00:19:57,819
of his mom's Valium thinking
he's eating Feel-Betters?

484
00:19:57,844 --> 00:20:01,031
- Oh, that's a lot of Valium.
- Not if his hands are really small.

485
00:20:01,056 --> 00:20:03,158
Well, that's not the takeaway.

486
00:20:03,227 --> 00:20:04,759
Oh God, no.

487
00:20:04,784 --> 00:20:06,892
- I feel so terrible.
- What?

488
00:20:06,917 --> 00:20:10,104
Oh... No, Tim! Why didn't you stop me?

489
00:20:10,175 --> 00:20:12,696
This was a terrible
idea! You're a doctor.

490
00:20:12,721 --> 00:20:14,895
'Cause I'm your husband first,
and you were really happy.

491
00:20:14,919 --> 00:20:16,307
All right, fine.

492
00:20:16,348 --> 00:20:18,293
I'll go fire the kids.
Sophia's gonna be pissed.

493
00:20:18,318 --> 00:20:20,519
She's been saving up her vacation days.

494
00:20:20,801 --> 00:20:22,871
I feel so stupid.

495
00:20:22,940 --> 00:20:25,519
Everything I do is for somebody else.

496
00:20:25,565 --> 00:20:29,450
You know, it's for my kids
or my husband or my parents,

497
00:20:29,475 --> 00:20:34,192
and I just wanted something
for myself, and... I blew it.

498
00:20:34,217 --> 00:20:36,035
No.

499
00:20:36,060 --> 00:20:38,622
Heather. Hey.

500
00:20:38,665 --> 00:20:41,755
You had an idea that you
turned into an actual business.

501
00:20:41,799 --> 00:20:44,181
- Yeah.
- So, it kills children.

502
00:20:44,206 --> 00:20:45,324
- Big deal.
- Oh...

503
00:20:45,368 --> 00:20:47,142
Your next idea will be a hit

504
00:20:47,167 --> 00:20:49,634
that might not kill children, huh?

505
00:20:49,659 --> 00:20:53,198
And when that happens, I'm gonna
be right here to support you.

506
00:20:53,565 --> 00:20:54,986
Thank you.

507
00:20:55,440 --> 00:20:56,558
You know what?

508
00:20:56,583 --> 00:20:59,052
- I do have another idea, actually.
- Oh, yeah?

509
00:20:59,077 --> 00:21:00,881
- Okay, you know how some kids eat glue?
- Uh-huh.

510
00:21:00,905 --> 00:21:05,209
Well, what if you just put
vitamins right in the glue

511
00:21:05,234 --> 00:21:07,825
and get Vita-Glue?

512
00:21:07,868 --> 00:21:11,586
But, uh, they're still
eating glue, so...

513
00:21:12,539 --> 00:21:14,218
Yeah, I'll just get
my real estate license

514
00:21:14,243 --> 00:21:15,470
like all the other moms do.

515
00:21:17,001 --> 00:21:22,001
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