1 00:00:06,381 --> 00:00:11,052 ‪NETFLIX 原创剧集 2 00:00:12,345 --> 00:00:14,556 ‪对 太离谱了 绝对是我们的错 3 00:00:15,473 --> 00:00:19,227 ‪不是的 那不是我们教育孩子的方式 4 00:00:20,186 --> 00:00:23,189 ‪我答应你 我一定会好好教训他 5 00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:24,858 ‪谢谢 6 00:00:26,109 --> 00:00:28,236 ‪你们几个小屁孩 ‪要猜猜对方是谁吗? 7 00:00:28,319 --> 00:00:29,487 ‪是墓园负责人吗? 8 00:00:29,571 --> 00:00:30,572 ‪再猜 9 00:00:30,655 --> 00:00:32,032 ‪以色列总理? 10 00:00:32,115 --> 00:00:33,366 ‪打错电话? 11 00:00:34,325 --> 00:00:36,077 ‪是一个九岁小孩的妈妈 12 00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:41,666 ‪她想知道 ‪为什么我脸上有个大屌的投影 13 00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:48,339 ‪天啊 我错过了唯一一个 ‪能让我开心起来的好事 14 00:00:48,423 --> 00:00:50,300 ‪事情发生在爸爸的办公室里 15 00:00:53,803 --> 00:00:55,096 ‪大屌 16 00:00:55,680 --> 00:00:57,140 ‪你们都闹够了! 17 00:00:57,223 --> 00:00:58,808 ‪-对不起 妈妈 ‪-我知错了 18 00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:00,268 ‪怎么回事? 19 00:01:00,351 --> 00:01:01,895 ‪你们怎么怕起妈妈来了? 20 00:01:01,978 --> 00:01:04,814 ‪明明从早到晚因为芝麻小事 ‪对着你们大声嚷嚷的人是我! 21 00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:07,442 ‪你们三个都走上了歪路 22 00:01:07,525 --> 00:01:09,986 ‪今天我们就要掰直你们的道路 23 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,906 ‪莫林 带着你的魔眼跟我走一趟 24 00:01:12,989 --> 00:01:14,491 ‪比尔 等着被我打屁股 25 00:01:15,533 --> 00:01:17,660 ‪那谁来掰直我的道路?狗吗? 26 00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:18,912 ‪想得美 27 00:01:20,955 --> 00:01:24,125 ‪坐上我的糖果车吧 ‪我们要下地狱去了 28 00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:29,422 ‪老爸 不要 这个男人好可怕 29 00:01:29,506 --> 00:01:33,051 ‪你以为你不可怕吗? ‪你这个狗娘养的妖孽! 30 00:01:33,134 --> 00:01:34,135 ‪给我上车! 31 00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:36,763 ‪我要你像流浪汉追赶火车一样 32 00:01:36,846 --> 00:01:39,099 ‪我的刹车油漏得严重 ‪比我老二漏尿的情况更糟 33 00:01:39,182 --> 00:01:42,519 ‪话说你为什么要我去新奥尔良? 34 00:01:57,075 --> 00:01:59,828 {\an8}‪(入伍通知书) 35 00:02:09,254 --> 00:02:10,505 ‪(逾期) 36 00:02:31,359 --> 00:02:34,904 ‪快点 我车上的奇巧巧克力 ‪都快融化成屎了 37 00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:37,490 ‪走吧 毛片警长 38 00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:38,867 ‪我们要去哪里? 39 00:02:38,950 --> 00:02:40,118 ‪我要带你去教堂 40 00:02:40,201 --> 00:02:43,288 {\an8}‪你对妖魔鬼怪和异端邪说的沉迷 ‪已经到了危险的程度 41 00:02:43,371 --> 00:02:44,622 {\an8}‪帕特神父要好好跟你训话 42 00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:48,084 ‪阿斯莫德 魔王之子 救我… 43 00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:49,294 ‪别再跟我说什么魔鬼了 44 00:02:49,377 --> 00:02:50,795 ‪(莫林) 45 00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:52,672 ‪(萨维茨基家族公司) 46 00:02:52,755 --> 00:02:55,133 {\an8}‪-爸爸不反对吗? ‪-你最好相信他不反对 47 00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:58,094 {\an8}‪可是爸爸说去教会 ‪就是去听58分钟的废话 48 00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,096 {\an8}‪然后被洗脑两分钟 49 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:04,309 {\an8}‪那是他女儿开始把墓园当自己家 ‪还企图唤醒死人 50 00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,937 ‪你所做的事是不对的 51 00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:11,441 ‪帕特神父要跟你好好训话 52 00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:14,027 {\an8}‪祂名叫耶稣 53 00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:16,738 {\an8}‪听见有人打喷嚏时 54 00:03:16,821 --> 00:03:19,073 {\an8}‪我们都会跟对方说一声 上帝祝福你 55 00:03:19,157 --> 00:03:21,409 {\an8}‪不让魔鬼找上你 56 00:03:21,492 --> 00:03:24,829 {\an8}‪披头士乐队说他们比耶稣还要伟大 57 00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:28,333 {\an8}‪上帝为了惩罚他们 ‪就派了小野洋子接近他们 58 00:03:28,416 --> 00:03:32,086 {\an8}‪上帝让你们沉入海底 59 00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:33,254 {\an8}‪大家一起唱 60 00:03:33,338 --> 00:03:35,381 {\an8}‪谢谢你愿意抽空跟莫林面谈 61 00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:41,012 {\an8}‪我最喜欢跟年轻人聊上帝 62 00:03:41,095 --> 00:03:42,639 ‪还有聊炸鱿鱼了 63 00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:45,141 ‪但我只爱吃炸鱿鱼圈 ‪不爱吃鱿鱼触手 64 00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:46,559 ‪我出去坐在长椅上等你们 65 00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:47,936 ‪你给我好好听话 66 00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:51,606 {\an8}‪好了 莫林 67 00:03:51,689 --> 00:03:54,484 {\an8}‪听到你妈跟我说你昨晚在墓园捣蛋后 68 00:03:54,567 --> 00:03:55,944 {\an8}‪我感到非常难过 69 00:03:56,819 --> 00:04:01,157 ‪巫术是一种罪 所有巫师都是恶魔 70 00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:02,742 ‪所以上帝惩罚巫师 71 00:04:02,825 --> 00:04:07,247 ‪在他们鼻子上放一颗痣 ‪对他们下诅咒 让他们飞起来 72 00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:08,498 ‪懂吗? 73 00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:09,666 ‪我应该懂了 74 00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:11,334 ‪适逢圣诞季 75 00:04:11,417 --> 00:04:13,795 ‪你应该把心思放在小耶稣上 76 00:04:13,878 --> 00:04:18,341 ‪祂降临人世 死在十字架上 ‪为的是要拯救我们脱离罪恶 77 00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:20,510 ‪所以圣诞节是讲述死亡的节日? 78 00:04:20,593 --> 00:04:23,012 ‪不是 那是复活节 79 00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:25,640 ‪但严格说来 ‪复活节讲述的是磨难和杀戮 80 00:04:25,723 --> 00:04:28,142 ‪所以我们才融入了 ‪复活兔和巧克力蛋的元素 81 00:04:28,226 --> 00:04:29,394 ‪以抵消这种负面的情绪 82 00:04:29,477 --> 00:04:32,355 ‪为了纪念耶稣 ‪为我们牺牲而死在十字架上 83 00:04:32,438 --> 00:04:35,316 ‪因此我们会在圣餐礼仪上 ‪吃耶稣的肉身、喝耶稣的宝血 84 00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:36,859 ‪你们竟然喝血? 85 00:04:36,943 --> 00:04:39,362 ‪其实只是打折买来的葡萄酒 86 00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:41,197 ‪不是真正的血 87 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,907 ‪谁说不是的? 88 00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:44,701 ‪严格说来不是 89 00:04:44,784 --> 00:04:48,579 ‪举行弥撒时 ‪你都说这是耶稣的宝血! 90 00:04:48,663 --> 00:04:50,373 ‪脑残 这是一种隐喻 91 00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:54,294 ‪按照圣餐变体论 ‪葡萄酒就是耶稣的宝血 92 00:04:54,377 --> 00:04:56,004 ‪这说不通啊 93 00:04:56,087 --> 00:04:59,257 ‪说得通才怪呢 宗教就是这回事! 94 00:04:59,340 --> 00:05:01,217 ‪我们要相信神夫所说的一切 95 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:05,305 ‪就像布朗神父每星期天说 ‪他只是在给我调整圣袍 96 00:05:05,388 --> 00:05:08,308 ‪布朗神父已经被调去阿尔伯克基了 97 00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:13,771 ‪我们认为把他安置在人口较少的州里 ‪他就不会那么“饥渴”了 98 00:05:14,522 --> 00:05:18,609 ‪莫林 我们回来聊聊耶稣诞生的奇迹 99 00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:22,905 ‪教会没提供真正的耶稣宝血 ‪这事就这么算了吗? 100 00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:25,366 ‪耶稣的宝血可是我们教会的根基啊! 101 00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:30,204 ‪就像耶稣是由抹大拉的玛丽亚所生 ‪这个玛丽亚的始胎未受原罪玷染 102 00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:31,372 ‪你是指玛利亚吧? 103 00:05:31,456 --> 00:05:33,374 ‪对啊 抹大拉的玛丽亚 104 00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:36,252 ‪不对 耶稣的母亲 ‪是童贞女玛利亚才对 105 00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:40,506 ‪抹大拉的玛丽亚是个随传随啪的妓女 ‪对吧 神父? 106 00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:44,802 ‪省略粗俗的语言 你的话倒是没错 107 00:05:44,886 --> 00:05:48,848 ‪但所谓的“圣母始胎无染原罪” ‪是指玛利亚的始胎未受原罪玷染 108 00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:53,144 ‪而不是指她受到圣灵感孕 ‪以处女之身生下耶稣 109 00:05:53,227 --> 00:05:55,521 ‪这是哪门子的说法? 110 00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:57,231 ‪有这么难懂吗? 111 00:05:58,024 --> 00:06:00,151 ‪上帝是所有人的父亲 112 00:06:00,234 --> 00:06:04,572 ‪祂既是玛利亚的父亲 ‪也是耶稣的父亲 113 00:06:04,655 --> 00:06:07,700 ‪耶稣是三位一体的真神 114 00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:11,037 ‪说明祂既是神 也是神子 115 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,456 ‪你是指耶稣跟自己啪啪了? 116 00:06:13,539 --> 00:06:15,792 ‪这当中没牵涉到任何通奸行为 117 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:20,171 ‪上帝让玛利亚受圣灵感孕 ‪所以祂也是玛利亚的父亲 118 00:06:20,254 --> 00:06:24,801 ‪而玛利亚的儿子耶稣 ‪也是她和他自己的父亲 119 00:06:24,884 --> 00:06:27,303 ‪这听起来像电影《唐人街》的桥段 120 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:30,640 ‪《唐人街》个屁 ‪明明是个美好的故事 121 00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:32,392 ‪把你的圣袍放下 122 00:06:34,352 --> 00:06:37,563 ‪无论发生了什么事 123 00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:40,817 ‪圣诞节是救世主耶稣诞生的日子 124 00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:43,194 ‪我读过一篇文章 ‪上面写耶稣其实是在4月出生的 125 00:06:43,277 --> 00:06:44,987 ‪-你给我闭嘴! ‪-才不是! 126 00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:46,406 ‪你是魔鬼的孩子! 127 00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:48,533 ‪我根本就没想来这里! 128 00:06:48,616 --> 00:06:51,160 ‪是我妈逼我来的! 129 00:06:51,953 --> 00:06:54,956 ‪我只是想 ‪如果能跟我爷爷的鬼魂说上话 130 00:06:55,039 --> 00:07:00,044 ‪我爸就会开心起来 ‪我就再也不用成为公主的搭档了 131 00:07:00,962 --> 00:07:03,714 ‪我不想当马蒂·艾伦! 132 00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:06,968 ‪我相信马蒂·艾伦 ‪也不想成为主持人的搭档 133 00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:09,220 ‪亲爱的 134 00:07:09,303 --> 00:07:11,305 ‪帕特神父 这是怎么回事? 135 00:07:11,389 --> 00:07:12,890 ‪我告诉你是怎么回事吧 136 00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:18,229 ‪天主教会经常被痛批虚伪 137 00:07:18,312 --> 00:07:20,815 ‪却没人质疑登陆月球究竟是真是假 138 00:07:20,898 --> 00:07:23,776 ‪只因为那是杰克·肯尼迪总统的梦想 ‪是大家心中的乐园 139 00:07:23,860 --> 00:07:26,654 ‪那个受到背痛困扰的狗杂种 140 00:07:26,737 --> 00:07:29,073 ‪见到美女就跟她们在泳池旁啪啪 141 00:07:29,157 --> 00:07:31,200 ‪却没人质疑他的人品! 142 00:07:34,328 --> 00:07:36,164 ‪谁在乎呢? 143 00:07:36,247 --> 00:07:37,874 ‪我要出去散步喘口气 144 00:07:39,917 --> 00:07:43,045 ‪妈妈 我感觉好多了 ‪我们可以回家了吗? 145 00:07:43,129 --> 00:07:45,214 ‪看来此地不宜久留 146 00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:48,551 ‪快点! 147 00:07:49,218 --> 00:07:51,137 ‪(香槟战车贩卖服务) 148 00:07:51,220 --> 00:07:52,555 ‪别再跟我说什么魔鬼了 149 00:07:52,638 --> 00:07:54,474 ‪走吧 毛片警长 150 00:07:54,557 --> 00:07:57,685 ‪那是意外 我不知道那是色情片 151 00:07:57,768 --> 00:08:00,480 ‪那个男人要按住墙上那个洞啪啪多久 152 00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:01,814 ‪你才意识到那是色情片? 153 00:08:01,898 --> 00:08:03,774 ‪(比尔) 154 00:08:03,858 --> 00:08:06,986 ‪那些警察把你变成了不良少年 155 00:08:07,069 --> 00:08:08,654 ‪我必须好好找他们训话不可 156 00:08:08,738 --> 00:08:11,741 ‪你是他们的责任 是他们失责了 157 00:08:11,824 --> 00:08:14,827 ‪有职责在身 就要尽忠职守 ‪否则就不是男子汉 158 00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:16,913 ‪这些都是什么鬼? 159 00:08:16,996 --> 00:08:20,750 ‪我要派发的报纸 这是我的职责 160 00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:23,336 ‪该死的! 161 00:08:23,419 --> 00:08:26,589 ‪号外 赶紧拿来看看吧! 162 00:08:26,672 --> 00:08:29,800 ‪今天头条是 ‪“居家男人穷于应付 霉运当头” 163 00:08:37,058 --> 00:08:38,226 ‪(超低价出售) 164 00:08:41,979 --> 00:08:44,815 ‪(铁锈城警局) 165 00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:49,570 ‪老爸 我还你钱就是了 ‪别让我在那几个警察面前丢脸 166 00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:52,406 ‪还我什么钱?帮你派报纸的酬劳吗? 167 00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:55,618 ‪你都没把工作没做好 ‪路上错过了20间房子 168 00:08:55,701 --> 00:08:59,121 ‪真可惜 他们注定要错过 ‪今天的《酷狗马马杜》了 169 00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:00,706 ‪我马上给读者们更新一下 170 00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:03,543 ‪它跳进浴缸里 ‪把整个地方弄得一团糟 171 00:09:03,626 --> 00:09:06,128 ‪你给我听好 ‪如果我是那部短漫出版社的老板 172 00:09:06,212 --> 00:09:07,713 ‪它会是我第一只赐死的狗 173 00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:09,757 ‪我要赐死它和那只自以为是的史努比 174 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:12,051 ‪只因为它考上飞机师 ‪就以为自己比我厉害? 175 00:09:12,134 --> 00:09:14,512 ‪狗屋是飞不上天的 该死的蠢货! 176 00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:17,765 ‪好了 我们进去吧 177 00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:22,937 ‪你们两个就是带坏我儿子的脑残吧? 178 00:09:23,020 --> 00:09:27,692 ‪我们都知道放毛片的事了 ‪你老婆到处跟人家说呢 179 00:09:27,775 --> 00:09:30,278 ‪天啊 她不是我老婆 180 00:09:30,361 --> 00:09:33,531 ‪弗兰克 很高兴有你来支持我的说法 181 00:09:33,614 --> 00:09:35,449 ‪菲利普 捂住耳朵 182 00:09:35,533 --> 00:09:40,162 ‪我儿子看到了不该看的东西 ‪这种东西通常只有安东尼会提起的 183 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:42,540 ‪去舔那个湿答答的小穴! 184 00:09:42,623 --> 00:09:45,751 ‪亲爱的 我们说好别再说这种话了 185 00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:48,588 ‪-姐姐想要大屌! ‪-吃个硬糖! 186 00:09:50,506 --> 00:09:54,885 ‪看来这事已经解决了 ‪感谢你们抽空前来 圣诞快乐 187 00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:57,054 ‪什么事都还没解决 188 00:09:57,138 --> 00:10:00,725 ‪我把儿子交给你们照顾 ‪你们却送他一部毛片 189 00:10:00,808 --> 00:10:03,144 ‪菲利普拿了毛片 ‪我拿了皮条客的帽子 190 00:10:03,227 --> 00:10:04,186 ‪我不管你拿了什么… 191 00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:05,104 ‪皮条客的帽子? 192 00:10:05,187 --> 00:10:07,398 ‪-上面还有一个子弹孔 ‪-那不是重点! 193 00:10:07,481 --> 00:10:10,735 ‪重点是你们带坏了这些孩子 ‪你们打算怎么着? 194 00:10:10,818 --> 00:10:12,445 ‪你打算怎么着? 195 00:10:12,528 --> 00:10:15,031 ‪我就打算做点什么啊 196 00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:18,159 ‪你们失责了 ‪所以我才对你们大声嚷嚷 197 00:10:18,242 --> 00:10:22,622 ‪你有责任确保孩子不走上歪路 ‪奉公守法 198 00:10:22,705 --> 00:10:27,293 ‪失责的人显然是你 ‪不然他当初就不会被警察扣留 199 00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:32,173 ‪你是孩子的父亲 ‪就要有当父亲的榜样 200 00:10:36,177 --> 00:10:38,596 ‪别再跟那些警察混在一起 ‪我不会再送你回去了 201 00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:39,639 ‪知道了 202 00:10:40,431 --> 00:10:43,601 ‪-我们要回家吗? ‪-没错 203 00:10:43,684 --> 00:10:46,395 ‪那为什么一直在我们家的巷口绕着 ‪迟迟不转进去呢? 204 00:10:48,397 --> 00:10:49,398 ‪(昨晚) 205 00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:50,524 ‪如果你没去维克家 206 00:10:50,608 --> 00:10:52,610 ‪在家好好照顾孩子 ‪就不会发生这些事 207 00:10:53,402 --> 00:10:56,656 ‪待在这个家不好吗? ‪你就这么想出门? 208 00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:59,450 ‪苏 这事我怎么想也想不透 209 00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:02,244 ‪是你从家里消失 ‪开车在城里兜圈子 210 00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,997 ‪只为了找出那个没用的匙孔 211 00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:06,832 ‪那不是没用的匙孔 212 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:10,336 ‪那把钥匙虽然是个没有生命的物件 ‪但对我而言意义重大 213 00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:13,339 ‪说一件让你高兴的事 ‪我找不到匙孔在哪里 214 00:11:13,422 --> 00:11:14,882 ‪-我放弃了 ‪-很好 215 00:11:14,965 --> 00:11:17,426 ‪但明天第一件事 ‪我会带比尔回到那个警局 216 00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:19,261 ‪好好教训那些警察一顿 217 00:11:19,345 --> 00:11:23,307 ‪我认为这也是 ‪给比尔进行性教育的大好时机 218 00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:25,768 ‪我倒认为没这个必要 219 00:11:25,851 --> 00:11:30,106 ‪弗兰克 他今晚看的电影 ‪足以给他留下一辈子的阴影 220 00:11:30,189 --> 00:11:33,442 ‪他需要知道性爱不是那一回事 221 00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:35,069 ‪是吗? 222 00:11:35,152 --> 00:11:37,530 ‪这么做很难吗? 223 00:11:37,613 --> 00:11:39,448 ‪当初你跟凯文怎么说 ‪现在就跟他说去 224 00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:42,284 ‪当初我说… 225 00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:44,870 ‪你从没教育过凯文基本的性教育? 226 00:11:44,954 --> 00:11:47,957 ‪苏珊 我以前忙着给他安身之处 ‪哪有时间? 227 00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:51,502 ‪天啊 我不知道能说什么 228 00:11:51,585 --> 00:11:54,922 ‪没那么难的 ‪你爸以前怎么跟你说来着? 229 00:11:55,005 --> 00:11:57,341 ‪女人都不是好人 没事不要手淫 230 00:11:57,425 --> 00:12:00,386 ‪好了 别再烦我了 ‪赶紧把那个该死的扳手递过来 231 00:12:00,469 --> 00:12:01,971 ‪不然我就用它来打你 232 00:12:02,054 --> 00:12:03,764 ‪很健康的性教育 233 00:12:03,848 --> 00:12:06,976 ‪这是你的责任 你是他的父亲 234 00:12:07,059 --> 00:12:10,604 ‪-我还真是“好爸爸” ‪-别让他失望了 235 00:12:12,606 --> 00:12:15,609 ‪-爸 你是不是心脏病发作了? ‪-我也希望是 236 00:12:17,236 --> 00:12:19,363 ‪天啊 来吧 237 00:12:31,584 --> 00:12:32,585 ‪是这样的 238 00:12:35,379 --> 00:12:38,799 ‪比尔 我想跟你聊一件事 239 00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:39,842 ‪威廉 240 00:12:39,925 --> 00:12:43,345 ‪还记得几年前 ‪你问我那些狗在干什么吗? 241 00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:45,890 ‪当时我说他们在玩骑高高 242 00:12:45,973 --> 00:12:47,141 ‪不记得了 243 00:12:47,224 --> 00:12:49,310 ‪好吧 记得有一次我们到市中心 244 00:12:49,393 --> 00:12:52,563 ‪你看到两个嬉皮士在公园“摔跤”吗? 245 00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:54,273 ‪你到底想说什么? 246 00:12:54,356 --> 00:12:56,275 ‪好吧 你听我说 247 00:12:56,358 --> 00:13:01,030 ‪人在成长期间 身体会想做点什么 248 00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:02,698 ‪就像人都有想吃的欲望 249 00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,992 ‪感到饥饿是没有错的 250 00:13:05,075 --> 00:13:09,955 ‪身体有这种反应 催促你不断地吃 ‪是完全正常的 251 00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:15,169 ‪随着年龄增长 ‪你不时会想要大量地吃 252 00:13:15,252 --> 00:13:17,588 ‪有时候 在浴室里想吃 253 00:13:17,671 --> 00:13:21,008 ‪醒来后肚子朝下时想吃 254 00:13:21,091 --> 00:13:23,260 ‪看到防晒乳液的广告牌时想吃 255 00:13:23,344 --> 00:13:26,055 ‪-我不饿 ‪-“饿”只是一种隐喻 256 00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:28,974 ‪-隐喻什么? ‪-我也说不上来了 257 00:13:29,558 --> 00:13:31,560 ‪让爸爸冷静一下 好吗? 258 00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:35,397 ‪阴道是… 259 00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:36,357 ‪不行 260 00:13:38,484 --> 00:13:41,403 ‪女人的“花瓣”是指… 261 00:13:41,487 --> 00:13:43,781 ‪找不到不要紧 很多男人都找不到 262 00:13:43,864 --> 00:13:45,533 ‪天啊 263 00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:50,955 ‪懂吗? 264 00:13:51,038 --> 00:13:54,458 ‪男人的那个和女人的那个同时接触 265 00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:57,795 ‪最后吸水管插入盖子上的洞口 ‪看到了吗? 266 00:13:58,546 --> 00:14:01,340 ‪天啊 干脆把老二掏出来 ‪摸索一下就好了! 267 00:14:01,423 --> 00:14:04,802 ‪爸 不要紧的 你没必要说的 268 00:14:04,885 --> 00:14:07,096 ‪我有必要说 毕竟我是你爸… 269 00:14:07,179 --> 00:14:10,182 ‪不是 我是认真的 我知道你很紧张 270 00:14:10,266 --> 00:14:13,602 ‪但你真的没必要跟我解释这种事 ‪我已经懂了 271 00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:14,603 ‪你怎么可能懂? 272 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:17,940 ‪那部电影不能反映真实情况 ‪真实情况跟这个吸水管和杯盖一样 273 00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:19,859 ‪-我知道 ‪-你怎么知道的? 274 00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:21,569 ‪我就是知道 好吗? 275 00:14:21,652 --> 00:14:25,406 ‪我近距离看过别人做这种事 276 00:14:25,489 --> 00:14:27,783 ‪-你在胡扯什么? ‪-没什么 277 00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:30,661 ‪别忽悠我 快说吧 278 00:14:30,744 --> 00:14:33,747 ‪-算了吧! ‪-快说! 279 00:14:35,583 --> 00:14:39,336 ‪记得去年某个晚上 ‪我吐到满桌子都是吗? 280 00:14:39,420 --> 00:14:43,424 ‪我吐是因为你和妈妈在那个的时候 ‪我就躲在床底下 281 00:14:46,135 --> 00:14:47,261 ‪不会吧? 282 00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:53,267 ‪天啊 不会吧? 283 00:14:57,813 --> 00:15:02,776 ‪你以后做什么我都不管了 284 00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:06,071 ‪只要你不跟你妈提起这件事就可以了 285 00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:08,449 ‪你妈已经为你们几个孩子 ‪操心到半死了 286 00:15:08,532 --> 00:15:11,160 ‪要是让她知道了 她肯定会一命呜呼 287 00:15:11,243 --> 00:15:12,620 ‪知道了 288 00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:14,330 ‪我还可以当警察吗? 289 00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:17,625 ‪只要你逮捕我 ‪把我关进死囚监狱就可以 290 00:15:22,338 --> 00:15:26,467 ‪快点 我车上的奇巧巧克力 ‪都快融化成屎了 291 00:15:28,844 --> 00:15:31,347 ‪斯莫奇 记得我在9月见到你时… 292 00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:34,850 ‪你要叫我黑人大神 293 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,477 ‪好的 黑人大神 294 00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:39,063 ‪我则叫你拉里 295 00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:41,065 ‪(拉里) 296 00:15:43,567 --> 00:15:44,860 ‪话说纽伯尔去了哪儿? 297 00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,153 ‪你是指拉里吧? 298 00:15:46,236 --> 00:15:49,365 ‪他决定离开我回去上学了 299 00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:52,076 ‪去给他的脑袋里填满教科书知识 300 00:15:52,159 --> 00:15:54,495 ‪图书馆是给我们洗袜子的地方 301 00:15:54,578 --> 00:15:58,457 ‪听说你一天到晚都在为 ‪某个平庸无奇的白人女子哭哭啼啼 302 00:15:58,540 --> 00:15:59,541 ‪这是搞什么呢? 303 00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:01,293 ‪她叫爱丽丝 她不是… 304 00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:05,297 ‪给我闭嘴 那是一个反问句 狗娘养的 305 00:16:05,381 --> 00:16:08,676 ‪你们墨菲家的人 ‪老是跟我倾诉你们的烦恼 306 00:16:08,759 --> 00:16:12,471 ‪“我爸死了 留给我一个神秘钥匙” 307 00:16:12,554 --> 00:16:14,723 ‪“我被某个女生甩了” 308 00:16:14,807 --> 00:16:18,018 ‪“艾米获选成为学校舞台剧的女主角” 309 00:16:18,602 --> 00:16:21,563 ‪你们根本不知道什么是真正的烦恼 310 00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:26,276 ‪今天早上 我身上只有14美元 311 00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:30,823 ‪我耳朵里住着一个蟋蟀 ‪也很快就要失去一只脚了 312 00:16:30,906 --> 00:16:33,993 ‪不是因为糖尿病 而是因为赌博 313 00:16:34,076 --> 00:16:37,204 ‪等着看他们笑话吧 ‪那只脚多年前就坏死了 314 00:16:37,287 --> 00:16:38,539 ‪因为我早前患上了糖尿病 315 00:16:38,622 --> 00:16:41,959 ‪所以我不想听到你跟我倾诉烦恼 ‪听清楚了吗? 316 00:16:42,042 --> 00:16:43,669 ‪是 黑人大神 317 00:16:43,752 --> 00:16:47,047 ‪你有的时间太多了 ‪所以老是想些有的没的 318 00:16:47,131 --> 00:16:48,716 ‪今天过后 你就没时间了 319 00:16:48,799 --> 00:16:52,636 ‪听好 在接下来九个小时中 ‪如果你敢上厕所休息 320 00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:54,054 ‪我就痛扁你一顿 321 00:16:54,138 --> 00:16:56,223 ‪补充一万颗走味的口香糖球时 322 00:16:56,306 --> 00:16:58,559 ‪你绝对不会有时间想女生! 323 00:17:00,644 --> 00:17:03,647 ‪我也说不上来 ‪她是我见过最完美的女生 324 00:17:03,731 --> 00:17:06,900 ‪她让我感到快乐 她喜欢我的背心 325 00:17:06,984 --> 00:17:09,945 ‪她启发我写下我经典的歌 326 00:17:10,904 --> 00:17:12,322 ‪我就我们的恋情写过一首歌 327 00:17:13,532 --> 00:17:17,828 ‪爱丽丝 我有一千个理由 328 00:17:17,911 --> 00:17:20,748 ‪让我无法忘记你 329 00:17:20,831 --> 00:17:22,291 ‪第一个理由 你的秀发 330 00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:25,377 ‪第二个理由 你的容颜 331 00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:28,964 ‪第三个理由 你的奶子 332 00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:31,216 ‪第四个理由 你的奶头 333 00:17:32,301 --> 00:17:33,385 ‪你这边怎么样了? 334 00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:36,013 ‪别问了 你那边呢? 335 00:17:36,096 --> 00:17:37,181 ‪一样 336 00:17:38,015 --> 00:17:41,685 ‪第514个理由 你的手肘窝 337 00:17:41,769 --> 00:17:44,313 ‪第515个理由… 338 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:49,026 ‪凯文 对不起 339 00:17:49,943 --> 00:17:52,321 ‪这个世界只有痛苦 340 00:17:52,404 --> 00:17:54,740 ‪谁都不应该承受这种痛苦 341 00:17:54,823 --> 00:17:58,118 ‪但我却不断地让人生下更多宝宝 342 00:17:59,036 --> 00:18:00,954 ‪我是个恶魔! 343 00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:07,127 ‪他真懂得聆听别人 344 00:18:09,171 --> 00:18:13,258 ‪天啊 当初谁会想到陪伴孩子成长 ‪有多么劳心费神 345 00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:18,388 ‪弗兰克 我不知道该怎么办了 ‪你在干什么? 346 00:18:18,472 --> 00:18:21,100 ‪-没什么 这床有问题 ‪-什么问题? 347 00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:25,354 ‪有点下垂了 ‪也许我们应该在床底下垫些行李箱 348 00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:29,149 ‪像是带刺的铁丝网、捕熊陷阱 ‪只要能占空间都可以 349 00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:31,151 ‪-你还好吧? ‪-不好 350 00:18:31,235 --> 00:18:33,403 ‪该死的孩子们快把我逼疯了 351 00:18:33,487 --> 00:18:36,949 ‪-弗兰克 他们渐渐转大人了 ‪-我知道 我不喜欢这样 352 00:18:37,032 --> 00:18:40,160 ‪-那我们该怎么办? ‪-大可多喝点酒 353 00:18:40,244 --> 00:18:44,957 ‪弗兰克 我是认真的 ‪我已经智穷计尽了 该怎么办? 354 00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:46,250 ‪我也不知道 355 00:18:46,333 --> 00:18:50,587 ‪天啊 我们把他们交给教会、警察 ‪还有一个整天嚷嚷的黑人教育 356 00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:52,172 ‪该做的都做了 357 00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:57,803 ‪也许我们可以对他们好一点 358 00:18:57,886 --> 00:19:01,265 ‪-那他们会以为自己侥幸逃过一劫 ‪-弗兰克 他们已经逃过一劫了 359 00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:03,851 ‪(墨菲家) 360 00:19:08,438 --> 00:19:09,565 ‪该死的 361 00:19:09,648 --> 00:19:11,567 ‪该死的保龄球 362 00:19:11,650 --> 00:19:12,943 ‪不错嘛 363 00:19:13,026 --> 00:19:15,028 ‪很好 瞧瞧大家的分数 364 00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:17,197 ‪苏 拿下142分 365 00:19:17,281 --> 00:19:21,493 ‪老爸 拿下稳妥妥的228分 多谢夸奖 366 00:19:22,286 --> 00:19:25,164 ‪比尔 60分 莫林 61分 367 00:19:25,247 --> 00:19:26,123 ‪凯文 368 00:19:26,915 --> 00:19:27,749 ‪零分 369 00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:31,587 ‪你和比尔爷爷平分 ‪但比尔爷爷已经死了 370 00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:34,673 ‪我还见过没有手臂的盲人 ‪表现得比你好 371 00:19:34,756 --> 00:19:37,467 ‪那是因为他们不像我 精神饱受折磨 372 00:19:37,551 --> 00:19:38,594 ‪“天啊 爱丽丝!” 373 00:19:38,677 --> 00:19:41,013 ‪-凯文失恋了 ‪-“撸撸我的大屌” 374 00:19:41,096 --> 00:19:41,930 ‪闭嘴! 375 00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:46,351 ‪够了 你们俩放过凯文吧 ‪他很痛苦 知道吗? 376 00:19:46,435 --> 00:19:48,770 ‪你们是他的家人 ‪家人不应该幸灾乐祸! 377 00:19:50,606 --> 00:19:53,859 ‪好了 再来一局 莫林 你来开局! 378 00:19:53,942 --> 00:19:56,612 ‪-我可以到游戏室玩吗? ‪-我也要 可以吗? 379 00:19:56,695 --> 00:19:58,488 ‪那边有很好玩的新款电子游戏 380 00:19:58,572 --> 00:20:00,490 ‪好吧 钱拿去 381 00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:04,453 ‪真是“划算”啊 ‪我花了1.50美元给你们租了保龄球鞋 382 00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:07,372 ‪我跟他们一起去 ‪确保他们不做犯法的事 383 00:20:07,456 --> 00:20:08,457 ‪太好了 384 00:20:09,958 --> 00:20:12,544 ‪-谢谢你刚才站在我这一边 ‪-我可是你爸啊 385 00:20:12,628 --> 00:20:15,756 ‪谢了 你还要我打保龄球吗? 386 00:20:15,839 --> 00:20:19,301 ‪当然要 瞧瞧你能不能打破 ‪你的最高零分记录 387 00:20:19,384 --> 00:20:22,930 ‪你要取出自动贩卖机里的保险套? 388 00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:27,768 ‪没错 不知怎么的 ‪那些保险套很可能有问题 389 00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:30,604 ‪你在里面买了保险套吗? 390 00:20:30,687 --> 00:20:32,439 ‪交出来 你用了一定后悔! 391 00:20:32,522 --> 00:20:35,275 ‪-我好像听到蟋蟀的叫声 ‪-我满耳朵就听到蟋蟀的叫声 392 00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:43,659 ‪-这一击有没有得分? ‪-你刚刚让我赌输了100美元 393 00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:48,038 ‪抱歉 老兄 他第一次打保龄球 ‪一直以来都是智障 不会有下一次了 394 00:20:48,121 --> 00:20:49,289 ‪好险 真是多亏了 395 00:20:49,373 --> 00:20:50,958 ‪我刚刚救了你一命 396 00:20:51,041 --> 00:20:52,918 ‪你需要沉一点的球 等一下 397 00:20:57,422 --> 00:21:01,218 ‪(大比尔 弗兰克) 398 00:21:01,301 --> 00:21:04,596 ‪用这个球吧 一定能够打中 399 00:21:05,889 --> 00:21:08,267 ‪其实这个球… 400 00:21:08,350 --> 00:21:10,602 ‪来自那个球架 我懂 那边有好几个 401 00:21:14,690 --> 00:21:18,443 ‪我打中了一个 ‪我打中了角落的那个小球瓶 402 00:21:18,527 --> 00:21:20,654 ‪对啊 你做到了 好样的 403 00:21:20,737 --> 00:21:24,741 ‪打中一个比全中更难 不是吗 老爸? 404 00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:26,868 ‪我想是吧 405 00:21:28,370 --> 00:21:30,914 ‪-这个游戏有什么意义? ‪-制造点点 406 00:21:30,998 --> 00:21:33,834 ‪-很好玩的 ‪-别让我分心 407 00:21:33,917 --> 00:21:35,669 ‪我多了一个点 408 00:21:35,752 --> 00:21:38,005 ‪天啊 她做出了很多点点 409 00:21:38,088 --> 00:21:40,882 ‪未来真是个奇迹 真的 410 00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,759 ‪我儿子要并吞整个未来 411 00:21:44,136 --> 00:21:46,638 ‪我觉得能够击倒所有球瓶也挺厉害的 412 00:21:46,722 --> 00:21:48,974 ‪对啊 谁说你的数学不行了? 413 00:21:52,686 --> 00:21:54,980 ‪-怎么了? ‪-没什么 414 00:21:55,063 --> 00:21:59,318 ‪对了 你还好吗?你最近过得好吗? 415 00:21:59,401 --> 00:22:01,862 ‪老爸 我们每次聊日常时 416 00:22:01,945 --> 00:22:03,739 ‪最后都会以吵架告终 417 00:22:03,822 --> 00:22:06,867 ‪我知道 那是因为我们父子俩太像了 418 00:22:08,201 --> 00:22:10,120 ‪我懂 太难了 419 00:22:12,414 --> 00:22:16,918 ‪你听我说 ‪我没出息是因为我爸对我不好 420 00:22:17,002 --> 00:22:19,087 ‪但我不希望你没出息 421 00:22:19,171 --> 00:22:22,424 ‪天啊 这种话你还是第一次跟我说 422 00:22:22,507 --> 00:22:26,720 ‪我知道 当爸的都不想承认 ‪自己其实也是个人 423 00:22:26,803 --> 00:22:30,891 ‪我知道你们当孩子的 ‪经常把我看成什么超级英雄 424 00:22:30,974 --> 00:22:32,517 ‪-是大反派才对 ‪-什么? 425 00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:33,560 ‪没什么 426 00:22:33,643 --> 00:22:36,772 ‪我不希望我们的关系 ‪跟爸爸和爷爷的关系一样 427 00:22:36,855 --> 00:22:40,025 ‪不然以后想和好也来不及了 428 00:22:40,108 --> 00:22:42,986 ‪所以我偶尔也要知道你过得好不好 429 00:22:43,070 --> 00:22:45,781 ‪我知道你因为爱丽丝而感到非常难过 430 00:22:45,864 --> 00:22:47,657 ‪还好 只是想起她时我都会难过 431 00:22:47,741 --> 00:22:50,827 ‪不想她的时候 432 00:22:51,495 --> 00:22:53,997 ‪要放下她不容易 433 00:22:54,081 --> 00:22:55,624 ‪是啊 我懂的 434 00:22:55,707 --> 00:22:58,168 ‪抱歉我起初并不理解你的心情 435 00:22:58,251 --> 00:22:59,836 ‪我以为这只是两小无猜的恋爱 436 00:22:59,920 --> 00:23:02,881 ‪老爸 我和爱丽丝是认真的 437 00:23:02,964 --> 00:23:04,174 ‪我知道 438 00:23:04,257 --> 00:23:06,885 ‪我们都认真做“做爱”做爱的事 439 00:23:06,968 --> 00:23:08,095 ‪我懂的 440 00:23:09,513 --> 00:23:11,431 ‪凯文 有件事说起来 ‪听了可能会很惊讶 441 00:23:11,515 --> 00:23:14,017 ‪世界上不是只有你承受过这种痛苦 442 00:23:14,101 --> 00:23:18,063 ‪我像你这个年纪时 ‪也深爱过一个金发美女 443 00:23:18,146 --> 00:23:21,400 ‪我爱她那么深 她却甩了我 444 00:23:21,483 --> 00:23:22,401 ‪妈妈甩过你? 445 00:23:22,484 --> 00:23:26,154 ‪不是 我指的不是你妈 ‪我是指菲丽斯·赫伯曼 446 00:23:26,238 --> 00:23:28,824 ‪你在认识妈妈之前有个女朋友? 447 00:23:29,866 --> 00:23:32,536 ‪-她漂亮吗? ‪-她是个大美女 448 00:23:32,619 --> 00:23:34,287 ‪没有人是她的对手 449 00:23:37,124 --> 00:23:39,876 ‪除了你妈之外 你妈比她漂亮 450 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:43,380 ‪她跟我分手后 我就像个行尸走肉 451 00:23:43,463 --> 00:23:45,590 ‪我以为没有她我会死掉 452 00:23:45,674 --> 00:23:50,595 ‪我竭尽所能地挽留她 ‪但她却开始跟杰克·德拉斯基交往 453 00:23:50,679 --> 00:23:52,973 ‪后来他们结婚了 ‪一起搬到罗得岛州定居 454 00:23:53,056 --> 00:23:56,101 ‪过了一段时日 我就放下了 455 00:23:57,185 --> 00:23:58,353 ‪之后我就遇见你妈了 456 00:23:58,437 --> 00:23:59,729 ‪这是你的损失 菲丽斯 457 00:23:59,813 --> 00:24:02,107 ‪你和妈妈认识后 就在一起到现在? 458 00:24:02,190 --> 00:24:04,067 ‪不是 我们的感情断断续续好一阵子 459 00:24:04,151 --> 00:24:06,111 ‪1958年 我们吵了一大架 460 00:24:06,194 --> 00:24:09,448 ‪原因是我在她还没大学毕业前 ‪申请入读飞行学校 461 00:24:09,531 --> 00:24:10,824 ‪我们分手了一段时日 462 00:24:10,907 --> 00:24:12,951 ‪这段时期我们好好冷静思考 463 00:24:13,034 --> 00:24:16,204 ‪之后我们复合了 ‪感情比分手前来得还要好 464 00:24:16,288 --> 00:24:18,165 ‪因为我们知道我们是命中注定的一对 465 00:24:18,248 --> 00:24:19,249 ‪然后呢? 466 00:24:19,332 --> 00:24:21,918 ‪然后你就出生了 467 00:24:22,586 --> 00:24:24,880 ‪接下来的故事 我不说你也知道 468 00:24:24,963 --> 00:24:29,885 ‪你是指我应该停止纠缠爱丽丝 ‪以平常心对待这段感情 469 00:24:29,968 --> 00:24:32,637 ‪如果我们是命中注定的一对 ‪那我们就会有结果 470 00:24:32,721 --> 00:24:34,473 ‪没错 如果你们不是命中注定的一对 471 00:24:34,556 --> 00:24:36,266 ‪那就不会有结果 你也不会怎么样 472 00:24:36,349 --> 00:24:38,310 ‪不用太担心 473 00:24:38,393 --> 00:24:41,813 ‪也别跟你妈提起菲丽斯·赫伯曼 ‪她们是表姐妹 474 00:24:41,897 --> 00:24:46,902 ‪我本来可以当个音响销售员 ‪住在迈阿密 475 00:24:47,611 --> 00:24:51,948 ‪穿着衬衫不扣纽扣露肚脐 ‪喝着莫吉托 476 00:24:52,032 --> 00:24:55,035 ‪找古巴女难民夜夜笙歌 477 00:24:55,118 --> 00:25:00,165 ‪但我没有这么做 ‪我必须让妈妈开心 成为上帝的仆人 478 00:25:01,583 --> 00:25:03,126 ‪嗨 莫林 479 00:25:03,210 --> 00:25:06,630 ‪嗨 帕特神父 神父可以喝酒吗? 480 00:25:06,713 --> 00:25:09,090 ‪喝酒是神父唯一的消遣 481 00:25:09,174 --> 00:25:12,802 ‪我们总要相信事情会好转的 对吧? 482 00:25:12,886 --> 00:25:14,262 ‪我们不能不信上帝 对吧? 483 00:25:14,346 --> 00:25:15,847 ‪对啊 我相信事情总会好转的 484 00:25:15,931 --> 00:25:17,891 ‪-那你还信上帝吗? ‪-不信 485 00:25:19,267 --> 00:25:22,354 ‪但你是好人 我不希望你会难过 486 00:25:22,437 --> 00:25:26,983 ‪-外头还有人需要你 ‪-你是指迈阿密的古巴女难民吗? 487 00:25:27,067 --> 00:25:28,235 ‪对啊 488 00:25:29,027 --> 00:25:30,070 ‪阿门 489 00:25:33,365 --> 00:25:36,076 ‪来一杯浓一点的威士忌 再加一块冰 490 00:25:36,159 --> 00:25:38,119 ‪这次麻烦你不要把手指伸进杯口 491 00:25:38,203 --> 00:25:39,704 ‪打到你了 492 00:25:40,372 --> 00:25:42,916 ‪你的尾灯坏了 王八蛋! 493 00:25:42,999 --> 00:25:46,253 ‪瞧瞧我们的孩子 他们都过得好好的 494 00:25:46,336 --> 00:25:49,464 ‪对啊 他们不是没出息的孩子 ‪他们只是惹了麻烦 495 00:25:49,548 --> 00:25:52,175 ‪他们只是需要跟家人好好相处 ‪就会好转了 496 00:25:52,259 --> 00:25:54,844 ‪我们今天用了不少管教孩子的“方法” 497 00:25:54,928 --> 00:25:56,930 ‪谁会想到解决方案就在保龄球场呢? 498 00:25:57,013 --> 00:25:59,057 ‪打保龄球是我出的主意 ‪所以该归功于我 499 00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:05,188 ‪说到跟家人相处 ‪我想要邀请我妈和我姐一起过圣诞 500 00:26:05,272 --> 00:26:07,607 ‪天啊 你喝太多了 501 00:26:08,608 --> 00:26:10,360 ‪可不是吗? 502 00:26:10,443 --> 00:26:11,778 ‪这两个女人最可怕了 503 00:26:11,861 --> 00:26:13,989 ‪我也想邀请路易斯来过圣诞 504 00:26:14,072 --> 00:26:16,741 ‪好啊 我们就邀请一大堆人过来 505 00:26:17,367 --> 00:26:21,079 ‪-你爸除外 ‪-我只是喝醉了 不是脑震荡 506 00:26:22,455 --> 00:26:26,334 ‪到时肯定会很热闹的 ‪只要确保蛋奶酒源源不断就行了 507 00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:28,086 ‪说到源源不断 508 00:26:28,169 --> 00:26:32,591 ‪我要去尿尿了 老弗兰克要去尿尿 509 00:26:37,512 --> 00:26:38,847 ‪该死的 510 00:26:38,930 --> 00:26:41,308 ‪弗兰克小子 你干什么呢? 511 00:26:41,391 --> 00:26:43,310 ‪不行 别理了 512 00:26:46,980 --> 00:26:49,524 ‪好吧 就最后一个了 我发誓 513 00:26:50,692 --> 00:26:52,444 ‪不可能插得进去的 514 00:26:53,945 --> 00:26:55,363 ‪该死的 515 00:26:55,447 --> 00:26:58,241 ‪真他妈的 弗兰克 里面什么都没有 516 00:26:58,325 --> 00:27:00,702 ‪肯定是空的 你真是个他妈的窝囊废 517 00:27:05,248 --> 00:27:06,833 ‪(比尔·墨菲 ‪1971年-1973年 #42) 518 00:27:06,916 --> 00:27:08,418 ‪天啊 519 00:27:11,504 --> 00:27:13,882 ‪天啊 好多卡带! 520 00:27:15,175 --> 00:27:19,304 ‪被我找到了 狗娘养的 521 00:27:19,846 --> 00:27:23,058 ‪老爸 我拿下了高分 过来看看 522 00:27:23,141 --> 00:27:26,186 ‪亲爱的 别烦我 ‪爸爸要跟家人好好相处 523 00:27:30,065 --> 00:27:32,984 {\an8}‪(谨以此片纪念 ‪迈克尔·肯尼斯·威廉姆斯) 524 00:28:01,096 --> 00:28:03,098 ‪字幕翻译:张庆龄