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‪NETFLIX 原創影集

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‪爸？爸

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‪-爸，我釣到一條了
‪-我來幫你，兒子

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‪天啊，爸，你寶刀未老

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‪一次心臟病是擋不住我的

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‪叫那些醫生拿心律調節器塞屁眼吧

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‪當初就是從那裡塞進去的？

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‪你居然沒要兩個

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‪我很高興我們有機會修補關係了

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‪我真的以為我會失去你

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‪來不及了解對方

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‪你在哭嗎，法蘭克？

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‪-沒有，我只是…
‪-我替你找個理由哭吧

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‪-什麼？
‪-我現在要死給你看

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‪不

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‪天啊，他不行了

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‪-快點想辦法
‪-我在想了，墨菲先生

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‪你屁啦，寇特魯格掛掉時

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‪他們把還在跳的猴子心臟
‪往他喉嚨裡塞，他就好了

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‪讓開

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‪-法蘭克
‪-爸，怎麼了？你想說什麼？

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‪法蘭克，你看，我製造了一條生命

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‪先別鬧，維克，爸，你想說什麼？

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‪我…

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‪這小傢伙是維克的模子

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‪他得包超大尿布，懂我的意思吧

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‪你會在時代廣場看到他

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‪我是說他有大屁…

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‪他媽的閉嘴好嗎？

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‪法蘭克

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‪怎麼了，爸？你想跟我說什麼？

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‪16號盒子

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‪16號盒子，什麼意思？

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‪他走了

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‪不行，你不能說完這種話就死掉

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‪起來，起來啊，你這混蛋

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‪爸，不要，別再打爺爺了

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‪閉嘴

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‪我是在幫他

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‪不會吧，爸在哭

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‪我沒有在哭，你才在哭

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‪你爸平常不是這樣的

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‪我要推你去撞那該死的隔簾

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{\an8}‪（兵單）

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{\an8}‪（過期）

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‪（威廉墨菲，1901至1974年
‪受人愛戴的鐵肺企業家）

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{\an8}‪（訃聞）

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{\an8}‪他一定是在錘打時擺的姿勢

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{\an8}‪法蘭克，我們該去葬儀社了

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{\an8}‪-半小時後要瞻仰遺容
‪-漂亮，來吧

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‪法蘭克，你不必裝堅強

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‪接下來幾天，你會經歷各種感受

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‪哀悼的過程很複雜

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‪解脫是過程的一部分嗎？

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‪因為我感覺就像剛報完稅

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‪法蘭克，你一定有悲傷的感覺

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‪沒有，這就像吃
‪白麵包沒芥末的爛三明治

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‪我知道我在嚼東西，但沒有味道

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‪之後打嗝都不知道自己吃了什麼

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‪你說了就算吧

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{\an8}‪確實是，鬼靈精死掉時
‪鎮上的人有哭嗎？

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‪鬼靈精沒死

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‪他敞開心胸後，大家都愛他

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‪-我不記得了
‪-因為你把電視關了

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‪還說
‪“這個綠色的混蛋讓我想到我爸”

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‪我鬧著玩的

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‪好，讓那個可悲的混蛋入土吧

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{\an8}‪上帝保佑他墓地周圍的樹，蘇

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‪它們週末等著去看心理醫生了

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‪不怕死的小巴斯特桑德再度出招

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‪且悲慘收場

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‪敬告觀眾，重播畫面寫實、令人不安

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‪並以慢速播放以取得最佳觀影效果

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‪如果附近有小朋友，就讓他們往前

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‪以免錯過他的臉摩擦瀝青的悶聲

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{\an8}‪靠，我好像看到他的蛋蛋飛出來

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{\an8}‪好好說話，比爾
‪我不希望你妹聽到不雅字眼

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{\an8}‪我習慣了，爸，你…

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{\an8}‪你是說她啊

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{\an8}‪親愛的，妳還是我的公主

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‪但妳現在是共同公主了

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‪就像麥克道格拉斯有共同主持人

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‪這是很重要的工作

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‪妳是馬帝艾倫，永遠別忘了

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‪我們週日還去保齡球館替我慶生嗎？

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‪什麼？我哪時說過要去的？

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{\an8}‪星期二
‪你跟葬儀社的人談完回家時說的

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{\an8}‪天啊，我有點失神

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‪你週二真的很難過

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{\an8}‪我沒有，天啊
‪男人不能盯著鞋子看嗎？

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{\an8}‪快15分了，她說會來看孩子的

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{\an8}‪我在這裡坐一個小時了

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‪我都尿失禁三回了

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‪我會好好照顧這漂亮的小寶貝

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‪我的小助理安東尼會幫我

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‪我要電子畫板、小巴斯特桑德娃娃

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‪跟臭屁股貓咪

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‪謝謝桑誕老公公

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‪傑瑞路易斯要展示他的槍枝收藏

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‪今晚在播出
‪寇特魯格的兩小時電視電影新作後

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‪我們邀請到洛杉磯湖人隊明星
‪與前第一夫人帕特尼克森來上節目

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{\an8}‪最爛的是我看不到寇特的電影了

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‪好，來吧

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{\an8}‪我們愈快到葬儀社，就能愈快結束

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‪不給糖就搗蛋

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‪哇靠

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‪天啊，這家爛透了，連續兩年了

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‪我居然又要錯過萬聖節了，爛透了

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‪對，我好想對我們家丟雞蛋

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{\an8}‪（歐杜利希
‪上公路前最後一家葬儀社）

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‪（緬懷威廉墨菲
‪蘭花廳，晚上7到9點）

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‪-今天讓人悲傷
‪-對，他是個好人

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‪他看起來好老

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‪-他像爸爸塗口紅
‪-只不過他在笑

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‪也許等你死了，你也會笑，爸爸

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‪-我會笑很開，親愛的
‪-沒人要死

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‪墨菲先生，你父親若知道你選了

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‪紅木堡壘X500會很驕傲的

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‪這是市面上最堅固的棺材

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‪連耶穌基督都踏不出來

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‪如果祂用這棺材下葬
‪我們就全成猶太人了

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‪每一分錢都花得值得

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‪多到爆的錢

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‪沒錯

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‪這種事不會有完美的時機，但…

126
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‪這是你的發票

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‪天啊，我們幹嘛不把他燒掉就好？

128
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‪後悔還來得及

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‪媽咪，比爾爺爺在哪裡？

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‪他就在妳面前，白痴

131
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‪媽，叫她別鬧了

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‪你們兩個都給我住手

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‪爺爺去天堂了，親愛的

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‪其實，由於他在死前

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‪沒得到臨終聖餐

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‪你爺爺的靈魂被困在煉獄

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‪度秒如百年

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‪他在煉獄？太慘了

139
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‪對，但他能藉由祈禱脫身

140
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‪那比靈薄獄好多了

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‪在那裡，未受洗的死寶寶憔悴不已
‪永世不得上帝垂憐

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‪-蘇，這傢伙在整我
‪-媽，爺爺永遠不得超生了？

143
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‪媽，我可以把領帶拿下來嗎？
‪我的脖子變綠了

144
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‪處置費？喪禮不就是在處置嗎？

145
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‪天啊，你下水會被公立泳池收費嗎？

146
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‪媽，這裡的東西可以吃嗎？
‪還是會進爺爺的墳墓？

147
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‪拜託你們，我在祈禱，安靜一點

148
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‪墨菲家？可憐的墨菲家？

149
00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:14,410
‪我操

150
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:17,455
‪蘇，過來讓我抱抱

151
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‪金妮，我得出去透氣，我不舒服

152
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‪葛雷在我沖澡出來時也這麼說過

153
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‪-嗨，蘇，妳…
‪-珍娜，感謝妳過來

154
00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:30,927
‪我知道法蘭克會很感激
‪但我得透透氣，抱歉

155
00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:35,264
‪可惡，如果有她
‪國稅局就不會找我碴了

156
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‪別想動手腳

157
00:08:36,682 --> 00:08:38,559
‪我們都是家長會的人

158
00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:39,977
‪鮑魚咪咪屁股會？

159
00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:43,189
‪你們最好別對我搬出工會那一套

160
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:45,566
‪開瓶費？

161
00:08:45,650 --> 00:08:49,403
‪法蘭克，你現在百感交集吧？

162
00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:50,821
‪我沒事，古莫

163
00:08:50,905 --> 00:08:53,616
‪對，我爸過世時，我很矛盾

164
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‪他倚在他逼我尿尿的電圍欄上
‪因此被電死

165
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‪苦樂參半
‪他電死時就是飄出苦中帶甜的味道

166
00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:02,083
‪別煩我，我沒事

167
00:09:02,166 --> 00:09:04,919
‪你這個悲傷可憐的男人

168
00:09:05,002 --> 00:09:07,380
‪褲子的事我原諒你

169
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:09,590
‪謝謝？

170
00:09:09,674 --> 00:09:13,427
‪所以只要找神父
‪替你在死前進行臨終儀式

171
00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:16,430
‪就算十惡不赦也能進天堂？

172
00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:18,015
‪一切都會被寬恕

173
00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:20,851
‪除了質疑寬恕的規則

174
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‪我乖了12年都白費了

175
00:09:25,439 --> 00:09:27,525
‪妳猜怎著？今天是聖灰星期四

176
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‪有一個沒熄

177
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‪妳死定了

178
00:09:35,032 --> 00:09:37,034
‪妳還是希望我們有孩子嗎？

179
00:09:38,744 --> 00:09:41,539
‪時時刻刻

180
00:09:44,500 --> 00:09:46,627
‪伊芙琳最愛搞笑了

181
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‪寶貝

182
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‪我要殺了妳

183
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‪哇靠

184
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‪這裡不適合活生生的小女孩

185
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:04,687
‪我來參加我爺爺的葬禮
‪我的神經病哥哥想打我

186
00:10:04,770 --> 00:10:06,480
‪我能在你這裡躲到他走嗎？

187
00:10:06,564 --> 00:10:10,443
‪我在這裡要做一些不是很愉快的事

188
00:10:10,526 --> 00:10:13,696
‪我不怕，我看過屍體

189
00:10:13,779 --> 00:10:16,157
‪之前在機場，有個男的在我面前爆炸

190
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:19,285
‪對，鄧巴頓那小子

191
00:10:19,368 --> 00:10:21,370
‪那天他們交出一大袋肉泥給我

192
00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:23,873
‪我用了整整兩桶頭漢堡才搞定

193
00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:24,999
‪（頭漢堡）

194
00:10:25,833 --> 00:10:26,834
‪酷

195
00:10:26,917 --> 00:10:29,128
‪你父親是很棒的人

196
00:10:29,211 --> 00:10:31,964
‪他對我說的第一句話是

197
00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:35,801
‪“我不相信你們的小帽子底下有角”

198
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:37,595
‪對，他人很好

199
00:10:38,095 --> 00:10:40,765
‪他好到爛，好到用拐杖揍我

200
00:10:43,267 --> 00:10:45,102
‪別聽他的

201
00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:48,981
‪-爸
‪-凱文

202
00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:52,318
‪爺爺死後，我認真思考了一番

203
00:10:52,401 --> 00:10:57,073
‪我在想，墓園有哪裡可以插音箱嗎？

204
00:10:57,156 --> 00:10:59,283
‪-什麼？
‪-我們有預算嗎？

205
00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,369
‪能不能讓其他團員買西裝？

206
00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:03,496
‪你到底在說什麼？

207
00:11:03,579 --> 00:11:06,499
‪你委託我明天在墓園獻唱

208
00:11:06,582 --> 00:11:08,709
‪-我什麼時候說的？
‪-星期二

209
00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:11,837
‪-他媽的星期二
‪-你說你以我為榮

210
00:11:11,921 --> 00:11:13,964
‪你這樣就是瞎掰了

211
00:11:19,637 --> 00:11:23,140
‪我甚至想出要怎麼寫過門
‪他媽的王八蛋

212
00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:25,476
‪-媽
‪-我什麼都沒做

213
00:11:26,018 --> 00:11:28,854
‪-怎麼回事？
‪-妳嫁的人是賤貨

214
00:11:28,938 --> 00:11:30,731
‪凱文，拜託你…

215
00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:32,858
‪妳得進去提醒他

216
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:37,738
‪他特別交代我
‪寫一首振奮人心的搖滾頌歌

217
00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:39,448
‪“天空爺爺”

218
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:40,825
‪-我也寫了…
‪-凱文，不

219
00:11:40,908 --> 00:11:43,869
‪-可是媽…
‪-放過你爸，好嗎？

220
00:11:44,620 --> 00:11:46,914
‪他現在很痛苦

221
00:11:46,997 --> 00:11:48,708
‪他剛失去父親

222
00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:53,045
‪我們都得拋開自己的情緒支持他

223
00:11:54,630 --> 00:11:57,800
‪所以妳到底要不要跟他提我的歌？

224
00:11:57,883 --> 00:12:01,178
‪凱文，靠近一點，我才能打你

225
00:12:05,766 --> 00:12:09,520
‪莫琳，我要給妳的臉一個驚喜

226
00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:15,025
‪爸，我找到一套死人的西裝

227
00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:18,696
‪正面談生意，背面上廁所

228
00:12:18,779 --> 00:12:21,574
‪-好兒子
‪-吉米，你在幹嘛？

229
00:12:21,657 --> 00:12:23,325
‪提早採買聖誕禮物

230
00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:26,245
‪要進來撈死人的鞋子嗎？

231
00:12:26,328 --> 00:12:28,581
‪不了，我最好別把衣服弄髒

232
00:12:28,664 --> 00:12:32,084
‪我爸星期一要拿去還給
‪不定期折扣省很大馬戲團

233
00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:34,962
‪爸，我找到一條死狗

234
00:12:35,045 --> 00:12:37,757
‪有錢女人會用來掛脖子

235
00:12:38,549 --> 00:12:40,342
‪-嗨，比爾
‪-嘿

236
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,970
‪你什麼時候才會明白
‪沒有我是你的損失？

237
00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:45,639
‪-我不在乎
‪-我是好對象

238
00:12:45,723 --> 00:12:48,058
‪我媽是36DD

239
00:12:48,642 --> 00:12:50,269
‪他媽的紅髮垃圾

240
00:12:50,352 --> 00:12:53,105
‪我剛發現教堂是個騙局

241
00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:56,984
‪只要在死前舉行臨終儀式
‪平常不用做好事

242
00:12:57,067 --> 00:12:59,153
‪對，我就等著這麼做

243
00:12:59,236 --> 00:13:01,322
‪拚命塗油就行了

244
00:13:01,405 --> 00:13:02,782
‪我要當神父

245
00:13:02,865 --> 00:13:06,535
‪-我以為你想當警察
‪-我要當警察和神父

246
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:10,748
‪這樣我就能胡搞，然後原諒自己

247
00:13:11,332 --> 00:13:14,960
‪大家會叫我“他媽的神父警官”

248
00:13:15,044 --> 00:13:17,421
‪爸，我找到杏酒

249
00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:20,090
‪只要能讓你忘記痛苦就好，兒子

250
00:13:21,717 --> 00:13:24,428
‪你爸是很棒的人，大好人

251
00:13:24,512 --> 00:13:26,472
‪好，謝謝

252
00:13:26,555 --> 00:13:29,475
‪最近大家很愛把“就像基督”掛在嘴邊

253
00:13:29,558 --> 00:13:30,976
‪但大比爾墨菲是…

254
00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:32,853
‪才8點10分？

255
00:13:32,937 --> 00:13:35,397
‪我還要微笑
‪忍受這種狗屎到什麼時候？

256
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:39,360
‪大比爾說他死後可以把腿給我

257
00:13:39,443 --> 00:13:42,279
‪尺寸不對，但有誠意就夠了

258
00:13:42,363 --> 00:13:45,157
‪他對我來說比我親爸更像爸爸

259
00:13:45,241 --> 00:13:49,161
‪他替我兒子付車錢去培訓

260
00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:51,163
‪還付了運送棺材回家的費用

261
00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:53,499
‪他在旅館很搞笑

262
00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:55,668
‪老是在哼唱那首啤酒廣告歌

263
00:13:55,751 --> 00:13:58,003
‪他是個不自私的情人

264
00:13:58,087 --> 00:14:01,549
‪他有一次在魚缸裡大便
‪然後說：“你看，伊利湖”

265
00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:05,177
‪來個啤酒、喝個啤酒
‪要不要啤酒？白宮啤酒

266
00:14:05,261 --> 00:14:07,721
‪我看得出來他當情人不會自私

267
00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:10,850
‪這小玩意他給了我好折扣

268
00:14:13,185 --> 00:14:15,521
‪才過七分鐘？幹

269
00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:19,149
‪抱歉我剛剛對你發飆

270
00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:21,318
‪待在裡面讓我情緒激動

271
00:14:21,402 --> 00:14:24,196
‪我看到你爺爺躺在棺材裡…

272
00:14:24,738 --> 00:14:26,699
‪他長得跟你爸很像，而…

273
00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:30,327
‪我實在無法想像沒有他的日子

274
00:14:32,079 --> 00:14:34,164
‪原來妳愛爸爸

275
00:14:34,248 --> 00:14:35,666
‪天啊，凱文

276
00:14:35,749 --> 00:14:39,086
‪-你覺得我為什麼跟他結婚？
‪-我不知道，讓他停止吼叫？

277
00:14:39,169 --> 00:14:41,672
‪我們很愛對方

278
00:14:41,755 --> 00:14:44,758
‪你跟他不合真的讓我很難受

279
00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:47,261
‪-所以妳才抽菸嗎？
‪-我不抽菸

280
00:14:47,344 --> 00:14:49,305
‪拜託，媽，我們都知道

281
00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:53,309
‪好吧，我就在冰箱的肝碗裡
‪放了一包而已

282
00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:57,396
‪還有馬桶的水箱裡
‪時鐘背面、妳的衛生棉條盒子裡

283
00:14:57,479 --> 00:15:00,274
‪-你動我的衛生棉條盒幹嘛？
‪-找菸啊

284
00:15:00,357 --> 00:15:02,902
‪你們其中一個是俄羅斯間諜

285
00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:06,947
‪我還猴子的叔叔咧，讓我教訓他

286
00:15:07,948 --> 00:15:08,782
‪（寇特對蘇聯）

287
00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:10,034
‪（衛生棉條）

288
00:15:10,117 --> 00:15:11,285
‪癌症棒

289
00:15:14,371 --> 00:15:18,918
‪寇特，我漫長的國家惡夢結束了

290
00:15:19,001 --> 00:15:21,003
‪不好意思，福特總統

291
00:15:25,507 --> 00:15:28,052
‪謝謝你的鮪魚，我好餓

292
00:15:28,135 --> 00:15:31,388
‪那個冰箱裡還有一些名牌汽水

293
00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:36,852
‪每個菜鳥都會上當

294
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:38,520
‪你對這個人有點壞

295
00:15:38,604 --> 00:15:41,815
‪他不知道我在幹嘛，他不在了

296
00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:44,944
‪那他在哪裡？我的爺爺呢？

297
00:15:45,527 --> 00:15:49,448
‪這是哲學家幾百年來爭論的問題

298
00:15:49,531 --> 00:15:51,367
‪有些人相信天堂

299
00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:55,245
‪有些人認為魂魄會依附到其他生靈

300
00:15:55,329 --> 00:15:59,750
‪我知道這位先生死了以後
‪他就不在這具軀體裡了

301
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:02,670
‪因為如果是，我對他這麼做

302
00:16:02,753 --> 00:16:05,839
‪就會成為史上大惡魔

303
00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:09,134
‪謝了，我可以留下來看你弄嗎？

304
00:16:09,218 --> 00:16:10,886
‪沒有壞處啊

305
00:16:12,596 --> 00:16:15,391
‪腐敗氣體來了

306
00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:20,187
‪媽，妳別再抽菸了

307
00:16:20,270 --> 00:16:22,606
‪要是妳死了
‪妳知道那是什麼意思嗎？

308
00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:25,818
‪我們會脫離不了爸，也不會禱告

309
00:16:25,901 --> 00:16:29,571
‪我擔心時會抽菸，家人讓我很緊張

310
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:32,950
‪你跟你爸處不來是最大的原因

311
00:16:33,033 --> 00:16:37,746
‪這樣吧
‪如果你跟你爸努力相處，我就戒菸

312
00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:43,085
‪好吧，以後他再怎麼過分
‪我都不叫他賤貨了

313
00:16:43,168 --> 00:16:46,005
‪-謝謝
‪-會很辛苦，但我會去做

314
00:16:46,797 --> 00:16:51,135
‪天啊，跟老爸很要好的話
‪等他死了時絕對很輕鬆

315
00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:59,309
‪-賞根菸？
‪-好，我的襯衫口袋裡有一包

316
00:17:01,478 --> 00:17:02,730
‪嘿，法蘭克

317
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:05,232
‪見到你們真高興

318
00:17:05,315 --> 00:17:08,110
‪我不能再忍受
‪有人拍我那死去爸爸的馬屁了

319
00:17:08,193 --> 00:17:10,320
‪我也不需要別人同情

320
00:17:10,404 --> 00:17:16,618
‪法蘭克，就讓我帶著
‪一堆人生爛抉擇擁抱你吧

321
00:17:20,122 --> 00:17:21,999
‪人生太珍貴了

322
00:17:22,666 --> 00:17:24,418
‪你要認真過每一天

323
00:17:24,501 --> 00:17:28,088
‪當成是中國城自助餐的最後取餐

324
00:17:28,714 --> 00:17:31,383
‪他們會說螃蟹雲吞沒了

325
00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:32,885
‪但才怪

326
00:17:32,968 --> 00:17:35,012
‪冷凍庫裡還有

327
00:17:35,095 --> 00:17:38,682
‪他們只是懶得解凍

328
00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:40,684
‪-好，鮑伯，好
‪-對

329
00:17:40,768 --> 00:17:44,104
‪鮑伯說得對，我們得認真度過今天

330
00:17:44,188 --> 00:17:46,482
‪對，明天去死

331
00:17:46,565 --> 00:17:48,692
‪我們只有今天了

332
00:17:48,776 --> 00:17:52,237
‪所以我決定要實現我的夢想

333
00:17:52,321 --> 00:17:56,283
‪開一家雞皮專賣店

334
00:17:56,366 --> 00:17:57,868
‪“皮皮”餐廳

335
00:17:57,951 --> 00:18:01,789
‪-你哪來的錢開？
‪-很簡單，耍詐就行了

336
00:18:01,872 --> 00:18:07,669
‪我慫恿鄧巴頓太太
‪把摩希根航空賣給阿拉基帕

337
00:18:07,753 --> 00:18:08,754
‪什麼？

338
00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:10,422
‪昨天成交了

339
00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:11,924
‪你叫她賣掉？

340
00:18:12,007 --> 00:18:17,012
‪鮑伯，我們坐那飛機差點沒命時
‪你說你要阻止交易的

341
00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:18,097
‪我知道

342
00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:22,768
‪但多虧你爸猝死，我又改變心意了

343
00:18:22,851 --> 00:18:25,395
‪-我爸？
‪-你害死我們了，你這混蛋

344
00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:28,357
‪別激動，讓我說完

345
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:34,154
‪你們可以保住工作
‪工時更長、薪水更低，而且沒有福利

346
00:18:34,238 --> 00:18:36,532
‪我要用你自己的脖子把你悶死

347
00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:39,243
‪你這個下巴像鵜鶘的王八蛋

348
00:18:41,370 --> 00:18:44,665
‪我以為你們的態度會更成熟

349
00:18:44,748 --> 00:18:47,292
‪-去你的
‪-你出賣大家，叛徒

350
00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:52,506
‪你們為什麼不能替我高興？

351
00:18:57,761 --> 00:19:00,973
‪爸，我20年的人生毀了

352
00:19:01,056 --> 00:19:02,724
‪就因為你死了

353
00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:05,811
‪所以你現在連死了都要整我？

354
00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:07,312
‪法蘭克，時間到了

355
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:09,773
‪謝天謝地，我可以回家了

356
00:19:09,857 --> 00:19:13,694
‪不，你該為你父親致哀了

357
00:19:13,777 --> 00:19:16,029
‪-我什麼？
‪-我們在電話上討論過了

358
00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:17,781
‪他媽的星期二

359
00:19:18,949 --> 00:19:21,285
‪-墨菲先生，你不能進去
‪-我不能才怪

360
00:19:22,578 --> 00:19:24,663
‪哇靠

361
00:19:24,746 --> 00:19:29,001
‪對我們的墮落髒天使表示一點敬意

362
00:19:29,084 --> 00:19:30,669
‪抱歉

363
00:19:31,628 --> 00:19:34,673
‪該死的混蛋，他媽的混蛋

364
00:19:34,756 --> 00:19:39,219
‪親愛的，沒錯
‪你嚥不下這麼多怒氣的

365
00:19:39,303 --> 00:19:41,680
‪你得開車門吐出來

366
00:19:41,763 --> 00:19:43,807
‪少管他媽的閒事，好嗎？

367
00:19:43,891 --> 00:19:47,644
‪-妳不知道我的痛苦
‪-我跟你有相同的遭遇

368
00:19:47,728 --> 00:19:52,107
‪我還沒走出喪父之痛
‪他已經走20年了

369
00:19:53,483 --> 00:19:56,236
‪妳怎麼處理對他的怒氣？

370
00:19:56,778 --> 00:19:59,406
‪對喔，到處賣

371
00:20:02,784 --> 00:20:04,119
‪不給糖就搗蛋

372
00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:06,288
‪-看看這群遜咖
‪-對啊

373
00:20:08,498 --> 00:20:10,000
‪去他的小孩狗屁

374
00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:22,971
‪你應該進去跟你老頭的老頭致意吧

375
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:26,016
‪我想是吧，但他是大混蛋

376
00:20:26,099 --> 00:20:30,604
‪所以呢？我媽是混蛋
‪但她還是會替我做好吃的三明治

377
00:20:30,687 --> 00:20:34,149
‪世上只有家人好

378
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:36,777
‪別忘了，否則我讓你屁股開花

379
00:20:36,860 --> 00:20:40,197
‪我們都說她能死拖活拖

380
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:42,699
‪但多虧鎮上的公車，她死了

381
00:20:42,783 --> 00:20:46,453
‪然後他說：“ 16號盒子”
‪這是什麼意思？

382
00:20:46,536 --> 00:20:49,248
‪我是說，他在臨終前
‪讓我變成偵探班納塞克

383
00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:52,417
‪-穿高領毛衣的大偵探
‪-感受這股怒氣

384
00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:55,545
‪是自然過程的一部分

385
00:20:55,629 --> 00:20:59,925
‪我在看守所廁所的水槽底下
‪找到的一本書

386
00:21:00,008 --> 00:21:02,886
‪提到哀傷的五個階段

387
00:21:02,970 --> 00:21:06,640
‪現在，你處於第二階段，憤怒

388
00:21:06,723 --> 00:21:09,518
‪小姐，我一出生就處於第二階段

389
00:21:09,601 --> 00:21:11,728
‪現在我們用一個吻

390
00:21:12,437 --> 00:21:15,565
‪-來送別他
‪-謝了，巴比，我不怕了

391
00:21:15,649 --> 00:21:17,651
‪我很高興能跟你一起過萬聖節

392
00:21:17,734 --> 00:21:20,237
‪對我來說，每晚都是萬聖節

393
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:21,154
{\an8}‪（失物招領）

394
00:21:21,238 --> 00:21:22,656
‪來，不給糖就搗蛋

395
00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:27,411
‪那些東西在火葬場
‪會像摔炮一樣炸開

396
00:21:27,494 --> 00:21:30,289
‪哀悼讓人痛苦

397
00:21:30,372 --> 00:21:34,001
‪但你得挺過才能到彼岸

398
00:21:34,084 --> 00:21:36,753
‪意思是你必須發洩怒氣

399
00:21:36,837 --> 00:21:39,548
‪流露人性並不可恥

400
00:21:39,631 --> 00:21:40,924
‪謝謝

401
00:21:41,008 --> 00:21:43,385
‪-需要手帕嗎？
‪-不用了

402
00:21:43,468 --> 00:21:46,680
‪-況且我不知道那在什麼場合用過
‪-你知道

403
00:21:52,477 --> 00:21:54,313
‪爸，你這個自私的混蛋

404
00:21:54,396 --> 00:21:56,857
‪你毀了我的人生，卻死在我面前？

405
00:21:57,607 --> 00:22:00,485
‪該死，去你的

406
00:22:00,569 --> 00:22:02,404
‪（香檳戰車，販賣服務）

407
00:22:02,487 --> 00:22:05,907
‪去你的，我可以來，這裡不能禁黑人

408
00:22:05,991 --> 00:22:07,617
‪你這白人鄉巴佬混蛋

409
00:22:07,701 --> 00:22:11,038
‪法蘭克墨菲，很遺憾你痛失至親

410
00:22:11,121 --> 00:22:11,955
‪（下班後）

411
00:22:17,586 --> 00:22:20,172
‪-法蘭克，你…
‪-我好多了，蘇

412
00:22:20,255 --> 00:22:23,216
‪有個聰明的妓女說
‪我可以表達我的感受

413
00:22:25,802 --> 00:22:27,429
‪有時候我不知道我幹嘛做

414
00:22:29,681 --> 00:22:32,851
‪有人要我聊聊我爸

415
00:22:32,934 --> 00:22:33,935
‪來吧

416
00:22:34,811 --> 00:22:39,232
‪“威廉墨菲於1901年3月14日

417
00:22:40,067 --> 00:22:41,234
‪在中國人渡輪出生”

418
00:22:41,318 --> 00:22:43,904
‪對生命的一場讚頌

419
00:22:43,987 --> 00:22:47,532
‪他多數時候是個好人

420
00:22:48,325 --> 00:22:50,744
‪現在上了天堂

421
00:22:51,453 --> 00:22:55,916
‪販售鎚和木頭給上帝

422
00:22:57,000 --> 00:23:01,171
‪再見，天空爺爺

423
00:23:02,714 --> 00:23:05,759
‪謝謝，今天大家真的很傷心

424
00:23:08,804 --> 00:23:10,347
‪你還好嗎？

425
00:23:10,430 --> 00:23:13,350
‪撇開那首歌
‪轟了我20分鐘不說，我沒事

426
00:23:13,433 --> 00:23:16,812
‪-莫琳，妳的保齡球派對恢復了
‪-本來有取消？

427
00:23:27,072 --> 00:23:28,156
‪（生日快樂，莫琳）

428
00:23:32,828 --> 00:23:33,745
‪（租鞋噴霧）

429
00:23:33,829 --> 00:23:36,790
‪一個給你，一個給我

430
00:23:38,625 --> 00:23:41,336
‪我要結第14道的帳，我姓墨菲

431
00:23:41,420 --> 00:23:42,587
‪沒問題

432
00:23:42,671 --> 00:23:46,508
‪那尿布小孩造成的損害要多收20美元

433
00:23:47,551 --> 00:23:50,053
‪這顆西瓜壞了

434
00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:52,806
‪沒事，我的心情很好

435
00:23:52,889 --> 00:23:55,350
‪-對了，你的球來了
‪-什麼球？

436
00:23:55,434 --> 00:23:59,229
‪你在23號訂了保齡球，剛剛到了

437
00:23:59,312 --> 00:24:01,523
‪我不知道你在說什麼

438
00:24:01,606 --> 00:24:03,483
‪（法蘭克，大比爾）

439
00:24:05,152 --> 00:24:07,237
‪可能是別的墨菲先生訂的

440
00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:09,364
‪-我不確定是誰
‪-我也是

441
00:24:10,615 --> 00:24:13,577
‪不管是誰買的，我不認識

442
00:24:14,911 --> 00:24:15,871
‪球很漂亮

443
00:24:16,580 --> 00:24:20,083
‪我想某個幸運的傢伙和他爸會很愛

444
00:24:20,167 --> 00:24:24,254
‪我們週四有個父子聯賽…

445
00:24:26,590 --> 00:24:28,258
‪你為什麼要死？

446
00:24:28,341 --> 00:24:30,844
‪我們錯過太多了

447
00:24:30,927 --> 00:24:32,679
‪我們正準備修補

448
00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:35,724
‪不

449
00:24:36,224 --> 00:24:37,934
‪（限投25分錢）

450
00:24:41,521 --> 00:24:42,647
‪爸

451
00:24:45,484 --> 00:24:46,610
‪爸

452
00:24:51,448 --> 00:24:52,491
‪（4張50分錢）

453
00:25:30,529 --> 00:25:32,531
‪字幕翻譯：張倩茜