1 00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:11,386 Come on, it's almost 7:00. Hurry it up. 2 00:00:12,804 --> 00:00:13,972 Let's go, chop-chop. 3 00:00:15,307 --> 00:00:16,658 - Hey! - Ah! 4 00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:18,936 - Since when do you read? - Since when do you care? 5 00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:22,064 Since I'm your father and I'll put you through that fucking wall! 6 00:00:22,147 --> 00:00:24,233 - Move your ass! You're gonna be late! - But Dad! 7 00:00:24,316 --> 00:00:25,150 But nothing! 8 00:00:25,234 --> 00:00:27,986 Oh, sorry, Princess. I thought you were Bill. 9 00:00:28,070 --> 00:00:29,655 What the hell is going on? 10 00:00:29,738 --> 00:00:31,490 Well, the kids are gonna be late for school 11 00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:34,117 and apparently I'm the only one around here who cares. 12 00:00:34,201 --> 00:00:37,120 - Frank, the kids are off today. - I tried to tell you. 13 00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:38,121 They're off? 14 00:00:38,205 --> 00:00:40,624 Oh, man, I was actually gonna go for once. 15 00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:42,668 Why the hell don't they have school? 16 00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:45,629 The teachers are in Atlantic City learning the metric system. 17 00:00:45,712 --> 00:00:46,922 Metric system? 18 00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:49,758 We declare war on people who use the metric system. 19 00:00:49,841 --> 00:00:52,511 What's next? They're gonna make us use chopsticks to eat soup? 20 00:00:52,594 --> 00:00:54,263 There's too much tension in this house! 21 00:00:54,346 --> 00:00:56,139 If you don't like it, go back under it! 22 00:00:56,223 --> 00:00:58,058 - Fine, I will! - Then good! 23 00:00:58,141 --> 00:01:00,435 Dick! 24 00:01:00,519 --> 00:01:02,229 Frank! You're scaring the dog. 25 00:01:03,730 --> 00:01:05,464 All these extra shifts you're working 26 00:01:05,489 --> 00:01:07,800 have made you even more agitated than usual. 27 00:01:07,867 --> 00:01:09,869 - Honey, rest up today. - I can't. 28 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,573 Smokey offered me half a morning shift and I took it. 29 00:01:12,656 --> 00:01:13,907 I got to head in there now. 30 00:01:13,991 --> 00:01:14,992 What?! 31 00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:17,035 You promised you'd stay home with the kids. 32 00:01:17,119 --> 00:01:18,120 They'll be fine. 33 00:01:18,203 --> 00:01:22,249 Just lock them in, throw a can of tuna on the couch and see which one survives. 34 00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:23,709 I got to go. Be home by noon. 35 00:01:23,792 --> 00:01:27,296 But, Dad, you said you'd take me to hockey tryouts at 10:30. 36 00:01:27,379 --> 00:01:29,047 Ah, Jeez. I can't. 37 00:01:29,131 --> 00:01:31,842 Ride over there on your bike! It'll toughen you up! 38 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:33,969 You have to take me to Honeybee Scouts at 1:30. 39 00:01:34,052 --> 00:01:35,721 Christ, how many kids do we have?! 40 00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:38,348 Back in the old days, the good Lord had the decency 41 00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:41,476 to take one or two out with polio, or get mauled by a bear, 42 00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:43,520 something to help out! 43 00:01:43,603 --> 00:01:44,896 Jeez! 44 00:01:45,613 --> 00:01:47,281 He'll be back to take you. 45 00:01:47,482 --> 00:01:50,569 Frank, working all these extra shifts is killing you. 46 00:01:50,711 --> 00:01:52,963 You're cranky, you're not sleeping. 47 00:01:52,988 --> 00:01:55,782 Don't exaggerate! I got a whole hour of sleep. 48 00:01:55,866 --> 00:01:58,785 That's one more than I got my whole time fighting the Koreans. 49 00:01:58,869 --> 00:02:00,370 Sneaky fucks. 50 00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:02,372 I don't know. This is not good. 51 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:05,125 You can't make big decisions like this without talking to me. 52 00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:07,210 We're a team, Frank. 53 00:02:07,294 --> 00:02:09,921 And I need you now more than ever, 54 00:02:10,005 --> 00:02:13,550 especially after I humiliated myself at work the other day. 55 00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:16,053 You're the only person I can turn to and... 56 00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:20,057 Frank! 57 00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:21,600 Where are the others? 58 00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:24,102 Fine! Work yourself to death. See if I care. 59 00:02:24,186 --> 00:02:27,230 Jesus Christ, Sue, get off my ass! 60 00:02:27,314 --> 00:02:28,565 What? You want me to quit? 61 00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:30,025 Let the family go hungry? 62 00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:31,401 There's no cereal! 63 00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:32,736 Fry a goddamn egg! 64 00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:34,071 There's no eggs either! 65 00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:35,781 Then eat your shitty attitude! 66 00:02:35,864 --> 00:02:37,699 - Dad! - Bill! 67 00:02:37,783 --> 00:02:38,992 - Frank! - Sue! 68 00:02:39,076 --> 00:02:40,327 - "Sue!" - Kevin! 69 00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:41,953 - Mom! - Kevin. 70 00:02:42,037 --> 00:02:43,955 - "Kevin." - Frank! 71 00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:48,251 Hey, guys! Saying each other's names? 72 00:02:59,805 --> 00:03:00,639 Goomer. 73 00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:37,801 Ah! 74 00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:53,108 Frank Murphy, saved my ass again. Boy, you keep up like this, 75 00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:55,986 and you can get your own truck. On the west side! 76 00:03:56,069 --> 00:04:00,824 That's the white neighborhood. Big Twinkies, tiny rubbers. 77 00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:01,867 Thanks, Smokey. 78 00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:03,910 You take Freddy's truck today. 79 00:04:03,994 --> 00:04:06,246 She's got a couple of bullet holes in her, 80 00:04:06,329 --> 00:04:10,125 boy got a dick in his mouth, but he got some nice titties, though. 81 00:04:10,208 --> 00:04:11,209 Here's your route. 82 00:04:12,289 --> 00:04:15,458 Ah, shit, the airport? 83 00:04:15,714 --> 00:04:17,466 Try not to let that bother you. 84 00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:21,052 I felt the same way the first time I restocked the machines at the jail. 85 00:04:21,136 --> 00:04:23,388 Hey, I didn't know you were a guard. 86 00:04:23,472 --> 00:04:27,684 Frank Murphy, you are so fucking white. 87 00:04:28,852 --> 00:04:32,606 Hello, future me and rock historians. 88 00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:36,276 Today, February 21, 1974, 89 00:04:36,359 --> 00:04:41,907 will be my last day as what we, in this time, call a virgin. 90 00:04:41,990 --> 00:04:44,826 This is like Christmas Eve for my dick. 91 00:04:44,910 --> 00:04:49,331 Haircut Girl, you will claim my squire-hood in... 92 00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:51,124 six hours?! 93 00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:53,084 Oh, shit! 94 00:04:53,168 --> 00:04:56,046 Oh, man. I can't wait that long. 95 00:04:57,756 --> 00:05:00,342 I must use this time productively. 96 00:05:31,195 --> 00:05:32,321 Shit! 97 00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:36,419 Jacques. Today, you and me are gonna make history. 98 00:05:36,503 --> 00:05:38,380 Here I go. 99 00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:43,426 Whoa. Whoa. 100 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:44,678 No! No! No! 101 00:05:47,097 --> 00:05:48,515 No! 102 00:05:48,598 --> 00:05:50,475 God damn it! 103 00:05:54,688 --> 00:05:57,065 It's not fair! I quit! 104 00:05:57,148 --> 00:05:59,276 - Bill, are you all right? - No! 105 00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:03,572 I broke my stick because my fucking dad can't take me to tryouts. 106 00:06:03,655 --> 00:06:04,990 That must hurt. 107 00:06:05,073 --> 00:06:06,866 Your dad's your hero. 108 00:06:06,950 --> 00:06:11,951 The one who reads you Bible stories, tousles your hair and says, "Attaboy." 109 00:06:12,154 --> 00:06:15,792 My dad calls me a pussy and asked God to give one of us polio. 110 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:18,086 You know what? Fuck it. 111 00:06:18,169 --> 00:06:20,589 Fuck the whole thing. Let's get something to eat. 112 00:06:20,672 --> 00:06:24,024 My dad already made me "Wuv You Waffles," 113 00:06:24,049 --> 00:06:26,930 but I'm happy to keep you company. 114 00:06:31,308 --> 00:06:32,851 Jesus, Scoop! 115 00:06:32,934 --> 00:06:36,313 "Finders keepers" doesn't apply to lost children! 116 00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:38,857 You're intimidated by my leadership skills. 117 00:06:38,940 --> 00:06:40,317 I see everything! 118 00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:43,737 Fucking immigrants! 119 00:06:44,487 --> 00:06:47,157 The nuns are gonna let us film in one of their classrooms, 120 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:50,201 but I told them the movie's called "Duck School." 121 00:06:50,285 --> 00:06:53,204 Bring some ducks, just in case. We can use them either way. 122 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:02,922 Ah! 123 00:07:03,006 --> 00:07:05,759 What the hell are you doing here? 124 00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:07,927 Back off, Bob. Just trying to do my job. 125 00:07:08,011 --> 00:07:09,346 I don't want any trouble. 126 00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:11,306 Well, you found trouble. 127 00:07:11,389 --> 00:07:16,269 You've got a lot of nerve coming back here, you fucking turncoat. 128 00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:28,907 Why did you leave me, Frank?! 129 00:07:28,990 --> 00:07:31,409 Why did you leave me?! 130 00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:32,577 You fired me! 131 00:07:32,661 --> 00:07:35,664 You could've just given her the goddamn pen! 132 00:07:35,747 --> 00:07:38,166 It was only a pen! 133 00:07:38,249 --> 00:07:41,419 But you signed my death warrant with it! 134 00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:47,592 Bob, Bob, get a grip. It can't be that bad. 135 00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:49,386 It's a living nightmare. 136 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:54,599 Look at that six-foot, two-inch toddler Dunbarton expects me to babysit! 137 00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:57,769 He sorts luggage by race! 138 00:07:57,852 --> 00:08:00,146 My blood pressure is spiking! 139 00:08:00,230 --> 00:08:02,816 And thanks to this crash diet I'm on, 140 00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:07,946 I've passed enough kidney stones to fill the bottom of a fish tank. 141 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:11,866 Oh, God. 142 00:08:11,950 --> 00:08:13,493 God, relax, Bob, relax. 143 00:08:13,576 --> 00:08:16,121 Easy for you to say, you're out of here. 144 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:17,956 I'm stuck with that. 145 00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:19,708 Go back to Africa! 146 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:25,338 He calls it "suitcase pasghetti!" 147 00:08:26,589 --> 00:08:27,841 God! 148 00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:32,929 You have my sympathy, Bob. 149 00:08:33,013 --> 00:08:34,764 Even you don't deserve this. 150 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:37,767 Thank you. 151 00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,853 You're a good man. 152 00:08:39,936 --> 00:08:42,230 We used to be friends, right? 153 00:08:42,313 --> 00:08:43,523 Good friends. 154 00:08:43,606 --> 00:08:44,482 Sure. 155 00:08:45,567 --> 00:08:47,235 Look, I better get going. 156 00:08:47,318 --> 00:08:49,821 I got a truck full of candy and cigarettes waiting on me. 157 00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:51,865 Candy? 158 00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,616 Cigarettes? 159 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:55,952 Waiting? 160 00:09:01,624 --> 00:09:04,753 Hey, Sue, I was wondering if you could help me with a little problem. 161 00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:08,089 - Sure, Dana, what is it? - There's this airhead in the office 162 00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:12,761 who's been pitching really terrible ideas. Oh, wait! That was you. 163 00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:15,263 Very funny. 164 00:09:15,346 --> 00:09:17,515 Dana, don't talk to Sue like that. 165 00:09:17,599 --> 00:09:21,269 You have to speak slower. 166 00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:27,484 Sue, my office, please. 167 00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:33,698 Don't worry, Vivian, I'll never pitch another stupid product again. 168 00:09:33,782 --> 00:09:35,825 - Sue... - I know I'm just a secretary. 169 00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:38,369 - Sue... - And I tossed my sketches in the trash! 170 00:09:38,453 --> 00:09:40,538 Yes, and thank God I saw them in there 171 00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:42,999 when I was throwing out the birthday card my father sent me. 172 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:45,919 That Japanese bitch he married probably picked it out. 173 00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:48,797 Wait. You liked my idea? 174 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,048 I loved it. 175 00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:52,884 Your Salad Tosser is a one-in-a-million product. 176 00:09:52,967 --> 00:09:57,514 I haven't seen anything this great since those corn skewers shaped like corn. 177 00:09:57,597 --> 00:10:00,225 - You think so? - I want to go over Tracy's head 178 00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:03,394 and take your idea straight to Henrietta Van Horne. 179 00:10:03,478 --> 00:10:04,813 Mrs. Plast-A-Ware? 180 00:10:04,896 --> 00:10:07,065 None other. Are you with me? 181 00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:08,733 Yes! Definitely! 182 00:10:08,817 --> 00:10:11,027 Great. I'll make some calls. 183 00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:13,071 Meet me in the ladies room in an hour. 184 00:10:13,154 --> 00:10:16,199 In the meantime, we have to keep this a secret 185 00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:18,785 - and act like nothing has changed. - Of course. 186 00:10:18,868 --> 00:10:20,453 So, go back out there 187 00:10:20,537 --> 00:10:24,749 and pretend like you hate every living second you spend in this building. 188 00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:31,131 I think I can do that. 189 00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:37,679 - It's something you have in your house. - Refrigerator. Sofa. TV. 190 00:10:37,762 --> 00:10:38,763 You sleep with it. 191 00:10:38,847 --> 00:10:40,723 - Husband. - Major, no! 192 00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:43,810 That's my Honeybee project. Here, have some ice cream. 193 00:10:45,103 --> 00:10:47,438 - Hot water bottle. - You sleep with it! 194 00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:51,693 I'm sorry. The Buzzword was "shotgun." 195 00:10:53,403 --> 00:10:56,906 - You just blew ten grand, you dizzy... - ...broad. 196 00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:03,371 Everything sucks today. You want to finish my omelet? 197 00:11:03,454 --> 00:11:06,499 No thanks. Egg products give me the stinkies. 198 00:11:06,583 --> 00:11:09,752 - Where's that waitress with our check? - I don't know. 199 00:11:09,836 --> 00:11:12,422 Perhaps she's marrying the ketchup bottles. 200 00:11:14,382 --> 00:11:17,594 - Hey. Let's go. - Without paying? 201 00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:21,180 - That's against the rules! - Who are you, my dad? 202 00:11:21,264 --> 00:11:23,266 Screw him and screw the rules. 203 00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:26,311 I'm tired of being good. Where's that ever gotten me? 204 00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:28,980 At breakfast with a dear friend? 205 00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:31,149 You can stick around if you want, 206 00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:34,068 but I'm leaving and I'm not paying. 207 00:11:37,488 --> 00:11:38,907 I feel dirty! 208 00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:40,533 Ah! 209 00:11:40,617 --> 00:11:43,161 Oh, yeah. Oh. 210 00:11:44,996 --> 00:11:49,584 Oh, this old chocolate bar tastes like shit, but it is so good! 211 00:11:50,752 --> 00:11:56,341 Oh, man... if they hadn't removed the nipple that grew inside my cheek, 212 00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:58,259 it'd be hard as a rock. 213 00:11:58,343 --> 00:12:02,639 Bob, you can have the whole box of stales, but I got to finish my route. 214 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:05,642 - I promised Sue I'd be home by noon. - Sure, sure. 215 00:12:07,352 --> 00:12:08,937 Oh, God. 216 00:12:09,020 --> 00:12:10,355 Bob Pogo! 217 00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:14,609 Where are you, you incompetent water buffalo? 218 00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:16,277 Aw, Christ. It's Dunbarton. 219 00:12:16,361 --> 00:12:21,324 Why in the fuck did you tell my nephew to throw suitcases into a jet engine? 220 00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:24,035 Frank, get me out of here until things calm down! 221 00:12:24,118 --> 00:12:25,995 - What? - I can't defend myself 222 00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:28,623 against that kind of crazy! Please! Drive! 223 00:12:28,706 --> 00:12:30,500 - Bob, I... - Go! Go! Go! Go! 224 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,335 Okay! Okay! Hang onto something! 225 00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:37,131 Two and a half hours. 226 00:12:37,215 --> 00:12:41,636 Almost enough time to calmly prepare for my life to change forever. 227 00:12:41,719 --> 00:12:44,806 Just relax and meet your destiny. 228 00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:52,397 Yes, but of course I have a condom. 229 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:54,107 Is this what you're looking for? 230 00:12:55,441 --> 00:12:56,651 Latex, my dear? 231 00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:01,114 You like that? Am I doing it right? 232 00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:02,532 Oh, yeah, baby. 233 00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:06,452 That's right, we're doing this. 234 00:13:06,536 --> 00:13:09,372 Oh, yeah, yeah, you're welcome. You're welcome. You're welcome. 235 00:13:15,545 --> 00:13:17,505 That burns my dick. 236 00:13:22,593 --> 00:13:25,805 Pogo, if you hate working with Scoop so much, why don't you quit? 237 00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:28,474 I can't. My marriage wouldn't survive. 238 00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:32,770 Dolores nursed me through five heart attacks and three "tub stucks," 239 00:13:32,854 --> 00:13:34,480 but this one might break her. 240 00:13:34,564 --> 00:13:37,442 - Get a job with another airline. - Doing what? 241 00:13:37,525 --> 00:13:41,738 My only skills are sitting behind a desk and pissing in a coffee can. 242 00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:44,490 You're the one who knows how to run a baggage department. 243 00:13:44,574 --> 00:13:45,825 What about Rosie? 244 00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:48,077 Now's not the time for jokes, Frank. 245 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:52,665 I mean it, you could come back to Mohican today and not miss a... 246 00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:58,004 Frank, I've got a proposition for you. 247 00:13:58,087 --> 00:14:02,175 Help me get rid of Scoop and I'll make Dunbarton hire you back. 248 00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:05,094 - Are you crazy? - I'm desperate! 249 00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:07,430 And Dunbarton is a businessman. 250 00:14:07,513 --> 00:14:10,016 The airline is hemorrhaging money, thanks to Scoop, 251 00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:12,935 and he's too vain to admit he made a mistake. 252 00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:17,565 But if you stepped in to run things the right way, even just for a day, 253 00:14:17,648 --> 00:14:21,569 instead of that idiot, he'd see the light and bring you back. 254 00:14:23,488 --> 00:14:28,951 If it were humanly possible for me to get down on my knees, I would. 255 00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:32,580 Please, help me and help yourself. 256 00:14:33,498 --> 00:14:38,461 Bob, if you had asked me two weeks ago, I probably would have said yes. 257 00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:41,672 But I got a job now where I'm appreciated. 258 00:14:41,756 --> 00:14:45,468 And I'm not under the thumb of a miserable prick like Dunbarton 259 00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:47,845 who humiliated me in front of my family! 260 00:14:48,971 --> 00:14:52,642 So, thanks for the offer, but my answer is no. Fuck no. 261 00:14:57,397 --> 00:15:01,734 Now, if you'll excuse me, this high school needs their cigarettes. 262 00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:10,868 Okay, no one can hear us in here. 263 00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:13,871 I spoke to Nikos, my guy down at the plastic plant. 264 00:15:13,955 --> 00:15:17,166 He's got four fingers and he still has his baby teeth, 265 00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:19,794 but he can assemble us a prototype on the sly. 266 00:15:19,877 --> 00:15:21,379 But I already made a prototype. 267 00:15:21,462 --> 00:15:25,258 We need a real prototype, something made out of actual plastic. 268 00:15:25,341 --> 00:15:27,665 We can't present the founder of Plast-a-Ware 269 00:15:27,714 --> 00:15:29,398 with a rusty washing machine. 270 00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:32,181 - Okay, I'm in. - Great. 271 00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:34,016 Now, we have to move fast. 272 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:37,232 Nikos can only do it tonight, and it's gonna cost us. 273 00:15:37,285 --> 00:15:38,745 Three hundred bucks total. 274 00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,691 You need to get me your half by the end of the day. 275 00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:44,485 Today? A hundred fifty? 276 00:15:44,569 --> 00:15:46,571 I could have Frank bring what I've got saved up at home, 277 00:15:46,654 --> 00:15:48,197 but that's a whole lot of money. 278 00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:50,825 Either that or you give Nikos your dirty panties 279 00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:52,326 and a Polaroid of your cooter. 280 00:15:52,410 --> 00:15:53,536 I'll get the money! 281 00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:05,590 Now to pay for my transmission. 282 00:16:09,177 --> 00:16:12,096 You shouldn't have done that. You had the money. 283 00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:15,933 And now I still have the money. That felt so good! 284 00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:18,311 I have a full belly and $11. 285 00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:20,646 And Christ, I have to take a piss. 286 00:16:22,064 --> 00:16:24,192 This is Jimmy's old fort! 287 00:16:24,275 --> 00:16:26,152 You can't pee on it. He'll haunt us. 288 00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:29,113 He can't touch us. I made him disappear. 289 00:16:29,197 --> 00:16:30,448 Forever. 290 00:16:30,531 --> 00:16:32,074 Come on, feel the freedom. 291 00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:35,495 Okay, but don't look at me. 292 00:16:35,578 --> 00:16:38,039 I have a bashful bladder. 293 00:16:41,209 --> 00:16:43,419 Oh, this is exhilarating! 294 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,422 I tinkle on your fort, Jimmy! 295 00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:51,511 Whose grave we desecrating? 296 00:16:58,392 --> 00:16:59,977 My God, Bob, what are you doing? 297 00:17:00,061 --> 00:17:03,189 I'm making my feelings go away! 298 00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:06,484 That's not the stales, you maniac! You're eating my inventory! 299 00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:08,945 I have to pay Smokey for all those freshies! 300 00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,321 Too bad, traitor! 301 00:17:10,404 --> 00:17:15,868 You fuck me, then I'm gonna fuck you... with my mouth! 302 00:17:18,454 --> 00:17:20,456 You know what I mean! 303 00:17:21,123 --> 00:17:23,626 Now I'm the one holding the key, Frank! 304 00:17:23,709 --> 00:17:26,671 God damn it! Open this door! I got to get home to my daughter! 305 00:17:26,754 --> 00:17:28,631 Fuck your daughter! 306 00:17:28,714 --> 00:17:29,924 You know what I mean! 307 00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,303 Murphy residence. This is Maureen. 308 00:17:34,387 --> 00:17:36,138 - I'm nine. - Put your father on the phone. 309 00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:37,265 I'm sorry. 310 00:17:37,348 --> 00:17:40,434 My father can't come to the phone right now. He's in the shower. 311 00:17:40,518 --> 00:17:41,852 Maureen, it's Mommy. 312 00:17:41,936 --> 00:17:43,854 Where the hell is Daddy?! 313 00:17:43,938 --> 00:17:45,773 He didn't come home by noon? 314 00:17:45,856 --> 00:17:50,194 No! I'm all alone here! And he's supposed to take me to Honeybee Scouts 315 00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:53,155 and I called your office and a mean man named Gene answered 316 00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:55,825 and he said he'd like to talk to my mother. 317 00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:56,951 What does that mean? 318 00:17:57,034 --> 00:17:59,161 Honey, I'm sorry your dad's not there. 319 00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:01,455 I'd like to know where he is right now too. 320 00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:03,624 Can you take me to Honeybee Scouts? 321 00:18:03,708 --> 00:18:07,003 No, sweetie, I can't. Can you walk over? 322 00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:09,171 I have a giant poster! 323 00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:11,215 Honey, I'm so sorry. 324 00:18:11,299 --> 00:18:12,967 Daddy and I will make it up to you. 325 00:18:13,050 --> 00:18:14,302 Fine! 326 00:18:14,385 --> 00:18:17,179 I hate this family! 327 00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:21,559 Jesus, Frank. Where are you? 328 00:18:21,642 --> 00:18:23,185 Excuse me, hon. 329 00:18:23,269 --> 00:18:27,565 This gentleman would like to call his wife while I service him. 330 00:18:28,816 --> 00:18:30,526 Stupid parents. 331 00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:34,572 Hello, Maureen! Are you being publicly shamed? 332 00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:36,324 Every day of my life. 333 00:18:36,407 --> 00:18:39,910 My dad said he'd take me to Honeybees, but he didn't show up. 334 00:18:39,994 --> 00:18:42,872 Well, I can give you a ride to your youth meeting. 335 00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:45,333 I'm not supposed to take rides from strangers. 336 00:18:45,416 --> 00:18:47,084 I'm not a stranger. 337 00:18:47,168 --> 00:18:49,837 I've known you since the day you were born. 338 00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:52,298 I took your mother to the hospital. 339 00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:54,133 So, my dad missed that too? 340 00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:57,261 I'm always happy to help! 341 00:18:59,388 --> 00:19:02,433 - Where are we going? - It's on Eisenhower Street. 342 00:19:02,516 --> 00:19:04,894 Ah! Eisenhower. 343 00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:07,480 If I had a Jesus, it would be him. 344 00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:10,650 God damn it, Pogo! Open this door! 345 00:19:10,733 --> 00:19:13,110 - Say you'll help me with Scoop! - No! 346 00:19:13,194 --> 00:19:15,404 Then fuck you forever! 347 00:19:21,702 --> 00:19:24,246 I'm taking you down with me! 348 00:19:24,330 --> 00:19:27,291 I should've driven over you when I had the chance. 349 00:19:28,751 --> 00:19:33,881 You un-loyal, ungrateful, fucking miserable piece of... 350 00:19:35,591 --> 00:19:36,842 Buddy! 351 00:19:45,810 --> 00:19:47,103 Dolores? 352 00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:51,315 A Puerto Rican kidnapped me and forced me to eat candy. 353 00:19:51,982 --> 00:19:53,859 Yes, again. 354 00:19:55,778 --> 00:19:57,738 And... 355 00:19:57,822 --> 00:19:59,115 it's two o'clock. 356 00:20:00,616 --> 00:20:03,285 Hi there, Mr. Merlin's Monocle. 357 00:20:04,078 --> 00:20:05,955 Right on time. I like that. 358 00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:09,625 Ready for your haircut? 359 00:20:12,086 --> 00:20:13,295 Yeah. 360 00:20:22,430 --> 00:20:25,433 I've never seen anything so beautiful. 361 00:20:26,434 --> 00:20:27,977 Please don't let me wake up. 362 00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:31,313 Here we go. Time for your haircut. 363 00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:33,691 And then a little "trim." 364 00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:35,317 I get it. 365 00:20:40,656 --> 00:20:43,492 You have beautiful hair. 366 00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:45,995 Thank you. I grew it myself. 367 00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:49,331 Oh, you're all sweaty. I like that. 368 00:20:54,670 --> 00:20:57,298 It's happening. It's really happening. 369 00:21:02,845 --> 00:21:06,182 I am ready to enter your crystal cave of wonder! 370 00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:07,558 Ravish me, oh, lord! 371 00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:09,560 Pillage my insides! 372 00:21:09,643 --> 00:21:11,979 Yes! Yes! 373 00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:13,898 I love you! 374 00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:17,026 Oh, shit. Oh, man! 375 00:21:17,109 --> 00:21:18,861 - Are you okay? - What? 376 00:21:18,944 --> 00:21:20,404 Yeah, I didn't do anything! 377 00:21:20,488 --> 00:21:21,489 It's all right. 378 00:21:21,572 --> 00:21:24,408 This thing happens to lots of guys. 379 00:21:24,492 --> 00:21:27,828 Maybe we'll just give it a minute or two, let you calm down. 380 00:21:27,912 --> 00:21:29,371 - I love you! - Ow! 381 00:21:29,455 --> 00:21:31,040 Ah! You chipped my tooth! 382 00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:33,459 - What the fuck is wrong with you?! - Nothing! 383 00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:36,003 My nose is bleeding! 384 00:21:36,086 --> 00:21:38,506 - It's not that bad. Let me get it. - Agh! 385 00:21:38,589 --> 00:21:39,965 Get out, you fucking freak! 386 00:21:42,426 --> 00:21:44,094 Will you tell everybody we fucked? 387 00:21:44,178 --> 00:21:45,888 Oh, shit! 388 00:21:45,971 --> 00:21:49,475 Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! So stupid! 389 00:21:49,558 --> 00:21:51,602 - You fucking dildo! - Yo, Murph! 390 00:21:51,685 --> 00:21:53,854 Aw, shit. Hey, guys. 391 00:21:53,938 --> 00:21:57,942 Oh, man, Haircut Girl fucked the shirt off of you. 392 00:21:58,025 --> 00:21:59,026 What did it feel like? 393 00:21:59,109 --> 00:22:01,487 I mean, I've done it already, like, you know, 394 00:22:01,570 --> 00:22:03,489 a lot, but just tell me how it felt. 395 00:22:03,572 --> 00:22:06,325 Uh, great. Great. Felt really good. 396 00:22:06,408 --> 00:22:09,662 I got to go. Shit! Shit! Shit! 397 00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:14,333 Yeah, he's got to go because after you do it, you get really cold. 398 00:22:16,961 --> 00:22:20,172 How can one man eat a $160 worth of candy? 399 00:22:20,256 --> 00:22:21,924 Thank God I stashed some beer money. 400 00:22:22,007 --> 00:22:25,386 Oh, you fucking motherless whore! 401 00:22:28,722 --> 00:22:32,309 Oh, fucking Kevin! Shit! Shit! 402 00:22:34,645 --> 00:22:36,480 What the fuck? 403 00:22:40,859 --> 00:22:41,777 Jesus, Sue. 404 00:22:46,156 --> 00:22:47,449 Just a quick loan, honey. 405 00:22:51,662 --> 00:22:52,913 Shit! 406 00:22:52,997 --> 00:22:55,082 Shit! Shit! Shit! 407 00:22:55,165 --> 00:22:56,542 Shit! 408 00:22:56,625 --> 00:22:58,711 Yeah, this is getting good. 409 00:23:00,921 --> 00:23:01,755 Damn it! 410 00:23:02,631 --> 00:23:03,799 God damn it! 411 00:23:05,467 --> 00:23:07,761 Ow! 412 00:23:07,845 --> 00:23:10,848 The computers of tomorrow will be capable of performing 413 00:23:10,931 --> 00:23:13,559 10,000 computations in five minutes. 414 00:23:16,395 --> 00:23:20,274 That's like fitting half a book in a box the size of this room! 415 00:23:20,357 --> 00:23:21,650 Excuse me, Maureen. 416 00:23:21,734 --> 00:23:24,278 This was supposed to be for the history badge. 417 00:23:24,361 --> 00:23:26,947 All you're doing is talking about the future. 418 00:23:27,031 --> 00:23:28,282 You're so weird! 419 00:23:28,365 --> 00:23:33,287 Maureen is boring And we're all snoring! 420 00:23:35,873 --> 00:23:37,666 All right, girls. That's enough. 421 00:23:41,337 --> 00:23:44,214 Okay, you want to hear some real history? 422 00:23:44,298 --> 00:23:46,675 Mr. Holtenwasser can tell you a story. 423 00:23:46,759 --> 00:23:48,302 I was wondering why he's here. 424 00:23:48,385 --> 00:23:51,639 Mr. Holtenwasser, tell them the story you told me in the car. 425 00:23:51,722 --> 00:23:54,266 I'd be delighted. 426 00:23:54,350 --> 00:23:56,727 Ah, let me think, where to begin? Where... 427 00:23:56,810 --> 00:23:58,020 Ah, yes! 428 00:23:58,103 --> 00:24:00,689 You girls like to play games. 429 00:24:00,773 --> 00:24:05,986 How many of you have ever had to lie in a latrine, pretending to be dead? 430 00:24:10,532 --> 00:24:11,533 God damn it! 431 00:24:12,368 --> 00:24:13,535 You blew it! 432 00:24:13,619 --> 00:24:14,995 We rehearsed! 433 00:24:15,079 --> 00:24:17,790 - Dozens of times! - What are you doing? 434 00:24:17,873 --> 00:24:20,376 Ah! Jesus, you scared me! 435 00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:22,753 You're the one talking to your pants. 436 00:24:23,504 --> 00:24:25,047 I'm locked out. 437 00:24:25,130 --> 00:24:27,424 I think I lost my key when I threw it at a bird. 438 00:24:27,508 --> 00:24:28,509 Agh. 439 00:24:28,592 --> 00:24:31,011 Well, I guess I should help you not freeze. 440 00:24:31,095 --> 00:24:34,014 Vic's got some Emu sweaters you can borrow. 441 00:24:34,098 --> 00:24:34,932 Thanks. 442 00:24:36,225 --> 00:24:38,727 Did you drop a glazed doughnut on your lap? 443 00:24:39,770 --> 00:24:42,398 And so in 1952, 444 00:24:42,481 --> 00:24:48,821 my wife and I moved to a little town called Liberty... Mississippi. 445 00:24:49,345 --> 00:24:52,306 We left because our front yard kept catching fire. 446 00:24:56,704 --> 00:25:00,082 Thanks. Pretty great you get to hang out at Vic's house all day. 447 00:25:00,165 --> 00:25:02,918 Yeah. All by myself with nothing to do. 448 00:25:03,001 --> 00:25:04,378 Sounds so cool. 449 00:25:05,838 --> 00:25:08,465 Ooh. It's freezing out. 450 00:25:08,549 --> 00:25:13,130 Yeah. It's cold and... hard. 451 00:25:15,222 --> 00:25:16,765 There it is again. 452 00:25:16,849 --> 00:25:18,726 Stupid thing won't go away. 453 00:25:27,818 --> 00:25:29,653 Hello? Maureen? 454 00:25:29,737 --> 00:25:30,571 Frank? 455 00:25:30,654 --> 00:25:32,448 Anybody? 456 00:25:32,531 --> 00:25:33,949 What happened here? 457 00:25:38,537 --> 00:25:40,039 What the hell? 458 00:25:42,374 --> 00:25:43,417 What the hell? 459 00:25:44,918 --> 00:25:48,005 Frank Fucking Murphy! 460 00:25:48,922 --> 00:25:51,300 "I'll be home by noon! I'll be home by noon!" 461 00:25:51,383 --> 00:25:53,093 Where the fuck are you now?! 462 00:25:53,177 --> 00:25:54,428 What?! 463 00:25:54,511 --> 00:25:57,973 What's the holdup, Sue? I got to get that money to Nikos tonight. 464 00:25:58,056 --> 00:26:00,601 Vivian, listen. The thing is... 465 00:26:00,684 --> 00:26:02,770 Will you get me the 150 or not? 466 00:26:09,026 --> 00:26:12,154 Yeah. Yeah, I'll have it. 467 00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:18,744 It's a really gorgeous piece. One of a kind. 468 00:26:18,827 --> 00:26:20,913 - You sure you want to sell it? - No. 469 00:26:21,830 --> 00:26:25,918 But I have to. I need this money badly. 470 00:26:26,001 --> 00:26:27,586 I might regret it later, 471 00:26:27,669 --> 00:26:30,631 but right now it's the only thing that can make this shitty day 472 00:26:30,714 --> 00:26:32,007 feel even remotely bearable. 473 00:26:34,551 --> 00:26:35,511 I understand. 474 00:26:40,766 --> 00:26:42,476 Enjoy your heroin. 475 00:26:47,602 --> 00:26:52,602 Synced & corrected by PopcornAWH - www.addic7ed.com -