♪ ARE YOU READY TO HAVE SOME FUN ♪
♪ IT LOOKS NICE ♪ ♪ WE ONLY REVERT JUST TO ADD
SOME SPICE ♪ ♪ "THE LATE LATE SHOW" ♪
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN ALL THE WAY FROM THE BOTTOM OF THE
LAKE MICHIGAN, GIVE IT UP FOR YOUR HOST, THE ONE, THE ONLY
JAMES CORDEN!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] THANK YOU FOR COMING OUT!
THANK YOU, EVERYBODY!
HELLO, GOOD EVENING, AND WELCOME TO "THE LATE LATE SHOW"!
THANK YOU VERY, VERY MUCH!
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AND SEE WHO OUR GUESTS ARE ON THE SHOW
TONIGHT.
SHE IS A HILARIOUS EMMY-NOMINATED ACTRESS AND
COMEDIAN YOU KNOW FROM "NAILED IT," "GIRL CODE," AND SO MUCH
MORE.
WE LOVE IT EVERY TIME SHE COMES ON THE SHOW, NICOLE BYER!
IT IS HERE TONIGHT!
HEY, NICOLE, HOW ARE YOU DOING?
Nicole: I'M FABULOUS, I AM WEARING GREEN, I AM IN MY BANG
ERA.
James: OUT, THERE WAS A LOT OF TALK BACK IN THE OFFICE, WE
WERE LIKE WOW, NICOLE IS IN HER BANG ERA.
IT'S LUXURIOUS, ISN'T IT?
James: IT IS EXCEPTIONAL, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING
HERE, WE LOVE YOU!
NICOLE BYER.
HE IS AN EMMY AWARD-WINNING ACTOR AND WRITER
YOU KNOW FROM THE ALL-CONQUERING "TED LASSO."
THE ONE, THE ONLY, BRENDAN HUNT!
IS HERE TONIGHT!
HOW ARE YOU, BRENDAN?
Brendan: I AM WELL.
James: JUST CAUGHT YOU RELAXING?
Brendan: READING MY BOOK, IT'S NOT A BOOK, I'M SORRY.
James: ARE YOU JUST LAYING IN THE DRESSING ROOM, BUT THERE
IS NO BOOK INSIDE?
Brendan: I WAS DISAPPOINTED, I HAVE BEEN LIED
TO, YES.
James: WE AT THE SHOW REALIZE THERE HAS BEEN A THEFT.
WE LOVE YOU, BRENDAN HUNT, EVERYBODY!
AND A TREMENDOUS STAND UP COMEDIAN, SO PROUD HE IS MAKING
HIS TELEVISION DEBUT RIGHT HERE WITH US TONIGHT, THE ABSOLUTELY
BRILLIANT ORION LEVINE IS HERE TONIGHT!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] HEY, ORION, HOW ARE YOU?
Orion: I'M GOOD.
I AM WORKING ON THIS PETITION "ORION LEVINE WITH THE
JAMES CORDEN ON "THE LATE LATE SHOW" FROM TUESDAY MARCH 21ST,
JUST A FEW MORE SIGNATURES.
AND THEN WE SHOULD BE GOOD.
James: YOUR MOM IS HERE?
WHERE IS ORION'S MOM?
OH, MY GOD.
WHAT IS YOUR NAME?
KAY SAID SHE IS GOING TO SIGN IT.
THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE, ORION LEVINE, EVERYBODY!
ARE YOU READY?
Reggie: YES!
James: OKAY, THEN I AM JAMES CORDEN, AND THIS, THIS IS
"THE LATE LATE SHOW."
ROLL THE TITLE!
"THE LATE LATE SHOW," WOO! ♪ ♪ "THE LATE LATE SHOW," OH, OH,
"THE LATE LATE SHOW" OH-OH! ♪ ♪ IT'S "THE LATE, LATE SHOW" ♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] James: IT CERTAINLY IS, A
GREAT CROWD, THANK YOU VERY MUCH, BLESS YOU, YOU ARE VERY,
VERY SWEET.
GOOD SHOW TODAY.
BRENDAN HUNT IS HERE, COACH BEARD ON "TED LASSO."
DID YOU HAVE ANY MEMORABLE COACHES WHEN YOU WERE IN SCHOOL?
Ian: MY FRESHMAN YEAR FOOTBALL COACH WAS THIS DUDE WHO
PLAYED, HONESTLY WHEN PEOPLE WORE LEATHER HELMETS.
SO HE WOULD GO ON LIKE A LONG RAMBLING STORIES THAT DID NOT GO
ANYWHERE PAIRED AND THEN WE WOULD HAVE TO GET HIM BACK ON
TRACK.
YOU KNOW?
James: KIND OF LIKE WORKING FOR PRESIDENT BIDEN.
Ian: PRESIDENT BIDEN COMING OUT.
[APPLAUSE] James: DID YOU PLAY ANY
SPORTS IN SCHOOL, REG?
Reggie: I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THAT.
[LAUGHTER] YES.
James: YOU DID, WHAT DID YOU PLAY?
Reggie: I PLAYED FOOTBALL IN JUNIOR HIGH AND HIGH SCHOOL.
James: WHERE YOU ANY GOOD, WITH WHAT POSITION?
Reggie: JUST ONE OF THE EXPERIENCE TO PLAY HIGH SCHOOL
FOOTBALL, BUT I CHOSE, I PLAYED A RIGHT GUARD, BECAUSE THERE WAS
DEODORANT AT THE TIME CALLED THE RIGHT GUARD, AND MY JERSEY
NUMBER WAS 69.
AND YEAH, AND I DID NOT KNOW ANY OF THE PLAYS.
SO I WOULD ALWAYS ASK OF THE NOSE GUARD AS WE WERE BRICK TO
THE HUDDLE, I WOULD ASK THEM WHAT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO DO.
AND HE HATED IT.
James: I BET.
YOU ACTUALLY, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU REMEMBER THIS, BUT VERY
EARLY IN THE SHOW, BEFORE WE HAD EVEN LAUNCHED, IT HAD ALWAYS
BEEN MY THEORY THAT I WAS BORN IN THE WRONG COUNTRY.
AND WHEN I WATCHED "THE BLIND SIDE" I WAS LIKE--
OH, MY GOD, THIS KID IS ME.
[LAUGHTER] GOOD AWARENESS, AND I AM LIGHT
ON MY TOES, THAT'S ALL THEY KEPT SAYING.
I WAS LIKE, HAD I BEEN.
HAD I BEEN BORN IN AMERICA, IT'S ALMOST--
I WOULD'VE BEEN THE NUMBER TWO OR THREE DRAFT PICK.
Reggie: I THINK I HAD KNOWN YOU FOR TWO MONTHS AT THIS
POINT.
James: AND YOU SAID YOU WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO DO IT.
AND I SAID I'M TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW.
AND HE SAID ALL RIGHT AND YOU GOT IN THE STANDS.
Reggie: WE WERE RIGHT OUTSIDE OF THE OFFICE KITCHEN ON
CARPET.
James: WE GOT DOWN COMING AND HE JUST POUNDED ME INTO A
WALL.
AND I WAS LIKE OH, OKAY.
YEAH, YOU ARE RIGHT, IT IS NOT BASEBALL.
HE REALLY CRUSHED.
THERE HE IS, NUMBER 73, BABY.
Reggie: ALL BEEF, BABY.
100% KOSHER BEEF.
THAT'S ALL THAT IS.
EVERYBODY-- James: IT WAS GOOD?
Reggie: I WAS GOOD AT FOOTBALL, BUT COULD'VE BEEN A
SIGN THAT I DID NOT HAVE A FUTURE, BECAUSE EVERYBODY ELSE
WHEN THEY TOOK THEIR FOOTBALL PICTURES IT WOULD BE LIKE--
THEY WERE VERY SERIOUS, STONED SERIOUS, DEAD SERIOUS, AND THEN
I WOULD NAIL DOWN AND I WAS LIKE HEY, ALL RIGHTS!
[LAUGHTER] [APPLAUSE]
James: WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN!
IT IS THAT TIME.
IT IS TIME FOR "THE NEWS."
OFFICIALS IN NEW YORK CITY WERE PREPARED TODAY FOR A POSSIBLE
INDICTMENT OF DONALD TRUMP AND ANY RESULTING PROTESTS WITH
THIRTY-SIX THOUSAND UNIFORMED POLICE OFFICERS STANDING BY IN
MANHATTAN.
YOU CAN BET TRUMP IS READY TO DEFUND THE POLICE NOW.
36,000 COPS IN UNIFORM.
36,000 IN UNIFORM.
THIS MIGHT SOUND EXTREME, BUT IT'S STANDARD PRACTICE FOR ALL
FORMER PRESIDENTS ABOUT TO BE ARRESTED FOR PAYING HUSH MONEY
TO PORN STARS.
[LAUGHTER] THAT'S HISTORICALLY ALWAYS BEEN
THE WAY.
THENYPD IS PREPARING FOR THE WORST.
MEANWHILE, MELANIA IS AT MAR-A-LAGO LIKE "PLEASE DON'T
PUT HIM UNDER HOUSE ARREST, ANYTHING BUT HOUSE ARREST..."
[LAUGHTER] [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
I TELL YOU WHAT, I CONSIDER HOUSE ARREST TO BE THE ABSOLUTE
DREAM SCENARIO, ISN'T IT?
OH, I WOULD LOVE TO, BUT I AM UNDER HOUSE ARREST.
Ian: TELL ME WHO I HAVE TO MANSLAUGHTER, BECAUSE--
James: MEANWHILE HOUSE REPUBLICANS ARE ON RETREAT IN
ORLANDO TO DISCUSS POLICY AND TALK UP THEIR AGENDA.
BUT THEY'RE FRUSTRATED, BECAUSE SO FAR, THEY'RE MOSTLY GETTING
PULLED AWAY TO DISCUSS TRUMP.
OH, YEAH?
NOT FUN, IS IT.
HAVING TO CONSTANTLY TALK ABOUT DONALD TRUMP.
WELCOME TO MY LIFE FOR THE LAST SIX YEARS.
REPUBLICANS ARE ANNOYED THEY HAVE TO FOCUS ON INCONSEQUENTIAL
THINGS LIKE THEIR FORMER PRESIDENT BEING CHARGED WITH
CRIMES.
WHEN THEY WANT TO FOCUS ON SERIOUS, IMPORTANT ISSUES LIKE
DRAG QUEENS READING IN LIBRARIES.
MOVING ON, A NEW STUDY FINDING MARRIAGE CAN LEAD TO WOMEN
LIVING LONGER, LEADING TO A GREATER SENSE OF PURPOSE, MORE
OPTIMISM.
YOU CAN SEE HUSBANDS EVERYWHERE LIKE, "TO ME SITTING HERE ON
THIS COUCH IS THE HEALTHIEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO YOU,
BABE."
MARRIAGE HELPS WOMEN LIVE LONGER, HAPPIER LIVES.
UNLESS OF COURSE THE MARRIAGE FALLS INTO THAT SMALL PERCENTAGE
THAT END IN AN EPISODE OF "DATELINE."
[LAUGHTER] THEN ANTS...
ACCORDING TO THE STUDY, MARRIAGE INCREASES LIFESPAN EVEN IF YOU
END UP GETTING DIVORCED.
SO LIKE A LOT OF PEOPLE IN LA, IF YOU GET REMARRIED LIKE FOUR
OR FIVE TIMES, YOU'RE PRACTICALLY IMMORTAL.
[LAUGHTER] HAVE YOU NOTICED A HEALTHIER
APPROACH TO YOUR LIFE SINCE GETTING MARRIED?
Ian: OH, YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
James: IT IS NIGHT AND DAY FOR YOU.
Ian: I WAS ON A COLLISION COURSE BEFORE.
James: YOUR NONHOURS WERE BETWEEN MIDNIGHT AND 3:00.
Ian: ALL 6,000 CALORIES OF MY DAY AND THAT--
THIS IS A TANGENT, I AM ON MEDICATION RIGHT NOW, SO IF ANY
OF THIS IS WEIRD, I APOLOGIZE, I WENT TO THE CHEESECAKE FACTORY
THE OTHER DAY, AND I KNOW IT'S CALIFORNIA STATE, BUT THEY PUT
THE CALORIE COUNT ON THE MENU AT THE CHEESECAKE FACTORY, STOP IT!
STOP IT.
James: I AM WITH YOU ON THIS.
Ian: STOP THAT.
Ian: IT'S CALLED THE CHEESECAKE FACTORY.
WHAT DO WE THINK WE WERE GETTING WERE GETTING?
James: NO ONE IS SITTING DOWN AND GOING, LET'S JUST GRAB
A BITE, OH, WE SHOULD LEAVE.
Ian: THERE ARE COMBINATIONS OF FOOD THAT YOU GET AT THE
CHEESECAKE FACTORY WITH THE AMOUNT OF CALORIES IS FOUR
DIGITS.
MORE CALORIES THAN I MADE IN MONEY A YEAR BEFORE I STARTED
WORKING HERE.
James: I DON'T NEED TO KNOW.
Ian: THREE SCIENTISTS IN NEW JERSEY HAD TO MAKE THE
CHEMICALS FOR THIS TO TASTE LIKE A CHICKEN FAJITA, SO LEAVE ME
ALONE.
James: I AGREE, I LIKE THIS THOUGHT.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] AND FINALLY, DODGE JUST UNVEILED
THE LAST GAS POWERED MUSCLE CAR THEY WILL RELEASE BEFORE THEIR
FACTORIES ARE CONVERTED TO MAKING ELECTRIC VEHICLES.
IT'S A 2023 DODGE CHALLENGER THEY'RE CALLING "THE LAST OF THE
RUMBLING CARS."
I LOVE HOW DODGE IS ALL SENTIMENTAL ABOUT IT.
LIKE, "HEY, BABE, LET'S POLLUTE THE AIR ONE LAST
TIME TOGETHER.
WHAT DO YOU SAY?" DODGE IS CONVERTING ENTIRELY TO
ELECTRIC.
IT'S HAVING AN IMPACT EVERYWHERE.
A NEW SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER COMING OUT.
"THE QUIET AND THE RESPONSIBLE."
WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE "THE LATE LATE SHOW," EVERYBODY!
James: LET'S MEET OUR GUESTS TONIGHT!
HE COCREATED AND STARS IN "TED LASSO," PLEASE WELCOME
BRENDAN HUNT!
♪ IT'S BRENDAN HUNT ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
SHE STARS IN "GRAND CREW," NICOLE BYER!
♪ IT'S NICOLE BYER ♪ Nicole: HI!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪
James: BLESS TO YOU FOR BEING HERE, THANK YOU FOR
COMING, WE LOVE IT EVERY TIME YOU ARE HERE ON THE SHOW.
BRENDAN, THIS IS YOUR FIRST TIME HERE, AND YOU ARE IN A
WHIRLWIND, YESTERDAY YOU AND THE "TED LASSO" CAST WERE AT THE
WHITE HOUSE, HERE YOU ARE WITH PRESIDENT BIDEN AND FIRST LADY
JILL BIDEN, HOW WAS THIS?
IT MUST'VE BEEN A BIG DAY?
Brendan: IT WAS A LITTLE ODD, BECAUSE I KNEW WHAT WAS
GOING TO BE THE SECOND BIGGEST THING I DO THIS WEEK.
James: I GET THAT A LOT.
Brendan: IT WAS SURREAL AND ABSURD, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT
HAPPEN.
WE WERE THERE TO TALK ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH AND DESTIGMATIZE
AN ANT IN OUR SOCIETY IN A WORLD, WHICH IS A FINE REASON TO
BE THERE.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] BUT I JUST WAS SPENDING THE
WHOLE DAY LIKE OH, MAN, I FART A LOT.
I DON'T WANT TO DO IT, MY BODY IS A MIRACLE, IT CONTAINS
MULTITUDES, I AM MOSTLY A SILENT FART-E.R., BUT SOMETIMES IT GETS
OUT.
AND I MANAGED TO WORK IT OUT, BUT UNFORTUNATELY THERE WAS TIME
WHERE THE SECOND GENTLEMAN ARRIVED, AND MY FLY WAS DOWN.
FOR AMERICA.
TO BE TO BE ON THE, FOR AMERICA.
I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THIS, YOU RECENTLY HAVE BECOME
OBSESSED WITH INSTAGRAM DIYs.
Nicole: YES.
James: HOW FAR HAS IT GONE?
Nicole: IT HAS GONE PRETTY FAR.
I PUT MY OWN WALLPAPER.
IT'S BAD.
THERE ARE GAPS, BUMPS, BUBBLES, AND I WATCH THESE THINGS.
AND I'M LIKE, I CAN DO THIS.
I CAN DO THIS.
AND IT'S OH, IT'S BECAUSE I AM AN ACTOR, I AM DELUSIONAL.
THERE IS SOME DILUTION TO WALK INTO A ROOM WITH FIVE OTHER
PEOPLE WHO LOOK IDENTICAL TO THE YOU AND BE LIKE, I AM THE BEST.
I AM TERRIBLE AT IT.
I WAS GOING TO PAINT MY GUEST ROOM, AND I HAD THE
BRUSHES AND I WAS LIKE, HOW DO YOU DO THIS?
WHAT DO YOU DUMP THIS END?
HOW DO YOU WASH THE BRUSHES?
I DON'T KNOW.
James: YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO WASH THE BRUSHES?
Nicole: IN THE KITCHEN SINK, THAT'S WHERE MY FOOD GOES.
IN THE BATHROOM?
I WASH MY DELICATE FACE.
TAKE THEM OUTSIDE, I CAN'T.
James: YOU ARE VERY SUCCESSFUL PERSON, YOU I
THINK-- YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS IF YOU
DON'T WANT TO.
A SKILLED PROFESSIONAL WOULD LOVE THE WORK.
Nicole: BUT IT IS SO MUCH MONEY.
AND I LIKE WATCHING MY BANK ACCOUNT GO UP.
James: AND YOUR WALLPAPER FALLS DOWN.
BRILLIANT.
Nicole: THE UP AND DOWNS THAT I LOVE.
James: WHEN WE ARE TALKING ABOUT JOBS, I WANT TO TALK ABOUT
THIS.
"TED LASSO" WAS YOUR FIRST EVER SERIES REGULAR JOB.
AND I HAVE A LIST HERE OF SOME OF YOUR EARLIER CREDITS.
THESE ARE ROLES THAT YOU PLAYED.
"SKETCHY DUDE", "TWEAKER", "SEX ADDICTION GROUP MEMBER", "LEAD
CLOWN", "CREEPY VAN GUY", "MORGUE ATTENDANT" - ANY IDEA
WHY THESE WERE THE PARTS YOU WERE ATTRACTING?
Brendan: I MAKE PEOPLE FEEL SAFE, AND I'M LIKE, ME, I AM THE
MORGUE ATTENDANT.
James: YOU COULD BE A CREEPY VAN DUDE, BUT I AM THE
CREEPIEST.
YOU'RE SO BUSY, YOU DO AND PROF, YOU HOST FOUR PODCAST, YOU HAVE
"NAILED IT" ALL ON TOP OF SPEED, WHAT IS YOUR ADVICE FOR ANYONE
TRIED TO GET ON TOP OF TIME MANAGEMENT?
Nicole: YOU HAVE TO GET AN ASSISTANT, ONE, CHANGE YOUR
EMAIL ADDRESS TO SOMEONE MORE FAMOUS OLD PEOPLE RESPOND
FASTER.
James: WHO IS YOUR EMAIL?
Nicole: IT'S BEEN WHOOPI GOLDBERG FOR ABOUT A
DECADE.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] YEAH, MY ZOOM NAME IS ALSO
WHOOPI GOLDBERG.
WHEN PEOPLE LOG ON, THEY ARE LIKE-- AND IT'S ME AND I'M LIKE
SORRY.
James: SO IT IS JUST WHOOPI GOLDBERG AT INSTALL
WHATEVER THE PLACES.
IT DOES WHOOPI KNOW ABOUT THIS?
Nicole: NOW SHE DOES SPREAD I'M SURE SHE IS AT HOME
WATCHING, LIKE I HOPE THEY TALK ABOUT ME, OH!
James: AND IT WAS AVAILABLE.
THERE IS NO NUMBER, NO LIKE WHOOPI GOLDBERG 7?
JUST STRAIGHT UP.
Nicole: I AM THE ONLY ONE.
James: WHICH MEANS AT SOME POINT SOME POINT WHOOPI GOLDBERG
WAS LIKE, WHO HAS TAKEN THAT?
[LAUGHTER] Nicole: SORRY ABOUT IT.
James: AND YOU SPENT YEARS DOING IMPROV, YOU HAVE DONE IT
ALL OVER THE WORLD.
PARTICULARLY A LOT OF IMPROV IN HOLLAND.
I DID NOT REALIZE THERE WAS A BIG AUDIENCE FOR IMPROV IN THE
NETHERLANDS, HOW DID YOU COME ACROSS THIS AND WHAT WAS IT
LIKE?
Brendan: JUST ENOUGH OF ONE TO FILL A THEATER, BUT IT'S
CALLED BLOOM CHICAGO, FOUNDED BY SOME CHICAGOANS WHO HAD TAKEN A
FEW IMPROV CLASSES AND THEN THEY POST A COLLEGE TOUR OF EUROPE,
AMSTERDAM WAS THE FIFTH PLACE THEY WENT TO, AND WITHIN TEN
HOURS OF BEING THERE, THEY WERE LIKE WE HAVE TO LIVE HERE
FOREVER.
AND THEY WERE LIKE LET'S JUST DO IT NEXT SUMMER, 30 YEARS LATER,
THE BIGGEST IMPROV THEATER IN THE CONTINENT.
[APPLAUSE] James: WOW.
Brendan: AND WHEN THEY THOUGHT UP THIS FANTASY OF HOW
ARE WE GOING TO LIVE HERE FOREVER?
THEY WERE HIGH.
IT WAS IN A COFFEE SHOP THAT THEY HAD THIS IDEA, BUT IT
WORKED.
James: HAVE YOU DONE IMPROV ABROAD?
Nicole: YES, ME AND MY IMPROV GROUP, WE WERE GOING TO
VANCOUVER AND WE GOT TO CUSTOMS GLOOM AND CUSTOMS.
AND THERE WERE LIKE WHAT ARE YOU HERE FOR?
I WAS LIKE I AM DOING IMPROV.
AND THEY WERE LIKE WHERE'S YOUR WORK VISA?
AND I WAS LIKE NOBODY GETS PAID.
AND I WAS LIE A DRUNKEN LOST MY OTHER ONE AND I HAD TO GET HERE.
AND THEY WERE LIKE, WHERE'S YOUR HOTEL?
AND I WAS LIKE I DON'T KNOW.
NOBODY TOLD ME TO BE LIKE I AM HERE VISITING GRANDMA, YOU KNOW
WHAT I MEAN?
SO THEY DETAINED ME FOR THREE HOURS.
A [LAUGHS] AND THEY HAD TO JUST WAIT FOR
ME, AND THEN ONE OF THE CUSTOMS PEOPLE WAS LIKE, HAVE YOU EVER
BEEN ARRESTED?
AND I WAS LIKE DUH, YES.
AND THEY WERE LIKE FOR WHAT?
AND I WAS LIKE IT WAS JUST SHOPLIFTING.
AND THEY WERE LIKE THAT SERIOUS HERE IN CANADA.
AND I WAS LIKE IS IT?
[LAUGHTER] [APPLAUSE]
James: SO WHAT HAPPENED?
Nicole: IT HAPPEN WHEN I WAS 18, SO IT WAS EXPUNGED FROM
MY RECORD, THEY CANNOT COME UP WITH ANYTHING SO THEY LET ME GO.
AND SASHEER AND KEISHA WERE LIKE, WE DID NOT KNOW IF WE HAD
TO FLY BACK OR CALL YOUR FAMILY.
AND I WAS LIKE I'M GOOD.
IT'S BEEN ON THAT IS A WONDERFUL STORY AND SOME MORE GREAT ADVICE
TO NOT DO THAT.
NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT "TED LASSO," CONGRATS ON THE
SHOW, BRENDAN!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] NOW I HAVE TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT
THIS SEASON.
I HAVE TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THE SEASON, BECAUSE OF COURSE
RICHMOND AFC, THEY ARE THE DASH IT'S T THE BIG TEAM IN THE SHOW,
BUT YOU HAVE CHOSEN MY TEAM WAS TAMMY UNITED, THE GREATEST TEAM
AND THE PREMIER FOOTBALL LEAGUE, AND I AM WORRIED THAT YOU ARE
MAKING THEM THE BAD GUYS OF THE SEASON, AND I DON'T LIKE
IT.
Brendan: WE ARE 100% MAKING THEM THE BAD GUYS, SO DON'T
WORRY ABOUT THAT.
DON'T LET THERE BE ANY DOUBT.
THE AMERICAN SPORTS MOVIES OF MY YOUTH, "BAD NEW BEARS"
"MAJOR-LEAGUE" THE BAD GUYS WERE ALWAYS THE NEW YORK YANKEES, AND
THAT HAS NOT HEARD THEM AT ALL.
SO THIS COULD WORK OUT FOR WEST HAM UNITED.
James: SO WHY WEST HAM?
Brendan: THE WONDERFUL RUPERT, PLAYED BY ANTHONY HIM
COMING THEY WERE LIKE-- WHAT TEAM CAN WE TAKE DOWN?
WEST HAM, THAT'S THE ONE.
THEY ARE THE RIGHT SIZE.
IT'S A GREAT QUALITY.
IT MEANS THAT THEY ARE STILL KEEPING IT REAL.
Nicole: OH, GOD, THE TENSION.
SITTING IN BETWEEN US.
James: A FAR, FAR SUPERIOR ATTENDANCE TO CHELSEA'S.
Nicole: I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE SPORTS.
James: YOU DO NOW.
CAN YOU PLEASE TELL HIM HE IS FULL OF [BLEEP]?
Nicole: YOU ARE FULL OF [BLEEP].
HERE'S A CLIP FROM "TED LASSO"!
SPEAK OF THESE GUYS ARE MORE DISTRACTED THAN A BUNCH OF CATS
PLAYING LASER TAG.
THEY HEARD THE PUNDITS SAY WE SUCK.
[BLEEP] PUNDITS.
YOU ARE ABUNDANT.
YEAH, AND ALL WE DID WAS TALK [BLEEP] ABOUT [BLEEP].
IT FEELS LIKE IT'S GETTING STUFFY.
LIKE ONE OF THOSE DAYS YOU WANT TO HAVE CLASS OUTSIDE.
WHAT THE [BLEEP] ARE YOU TWO TALKING ABOUT, WE ARE OUTSIDE?
James: STICK AROUND, MORE WITH THESE TWO WHEN WE COME
BACK!
James: WE ARE BACK WITH NICOLE BYER AND BRENDAN HUNT.
NOW, BRENDAN, YOU'VE RECENTLY BEEN SPENDING A FAIR AMOUNT OF
IN GOD'S COUNTRY, THE UNITED KINGDOM FILMING "TED LASSO," AND
NICOLE, YOU LIVE HERE IN AMERICA, WE WOULD LIKE TO PLAY A
GAME THAT WE CALL "U.K. OR USA."
SO HERE'S HOW IT WILL WORK, SOME OF THESE PEOPLE WERE BORN IN THE
TROPICAL ISLAND OF GREAT BRITAIN, AND SOME OF THEM
WERE BORN HERE IN THE UNTED STATES OF AMERICA.
WITH THE HELP OF NICOLE AS A TEAM, I WOULD LIKE YOU TO FIGURE
OUT WHO IS FROM WHERE, OKAY?
SO LET'S GO DOWN THE LINE.
WHO LOOKS TO YOU LIKE THEY MIGHT BE BRITISH?
Brendan: FIRST OF ALL, WELL CHOSEN NOMINEES, EVERY SINGLE
ONE COULD GO EITHER WAY.
CERTAINLY TALL BALD AND IMPOSING, I'M GOING U.K. ON THAT
RIGHT NOW.
PUNK ROCK HERE ON THE LEFT, CERTAINLY SUGGESTS U.K., BUT ARE
YOU TRYING TO TRICK ME?
James: WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS?
Nicole: OKAY, NUMBER 3, BOY, YOU ARE TRICKY.
AMERICAN.
I THINK NUMBER 5 IS BRITISH, AND DON'T ASK ME WHY.
HE HAD THAT LITTLE CHUCKLE, YEAH, THAT'S BRITISH.
James: HERE'S WHAT WE CAN DO.
WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO HEAR SPEAK?
SO WE CAN ASK THEM TO DO A BRITISH OR AN AMERICAN ACCENT,
WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO HEAR IN WHICH ACCENTS WOULD YOU LIKE?
Brendan: I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR HER NUMBER 3 AN AMERICAN
ACCENT.
James: I WILL GIVE YOU THIS TO SAY AN AMERICAN WHICH IS
"WE'RE POPPIN' BOTTLES AT THE CLUB.
PULL UP, YOU JACKASS!" "WE'RE POPPIN' BOTTLES AT
THE CLUB.
PULL UP, YOU JACKASS!" James: VERY GOOD, VERY
GOOD, IF ANYTHING IT HAS MUDDIED THE WATER.
ANYTHING YOU WOULD LIKE TO HEAR FROM?
Nicole: I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR NUMBER ONE AN END A BRITISH
ACCENT.
IT'S BEEN, NUMBER ONE, IN A BRITISH ACCENT,
SAY "WE'RE GOING TO THE PUB FOR A KNEES-UP, YOU MUPPET!"
"WE'RE GOING TO THE PUB FOR A KNEES-UP, YOU MUPPET!"
James: THAT WAS VERY GOOD.
I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR FROM NUMBEY "WE'RE GOING TO THE PUB FOR
A KNEES-UP, YOU MUPPET!" "WE'RE GOING TO THE PUB FOR
A KNEES-UP, YOU MUPPET!" James: CAN WE DO 2 AS WELL?
AMERICAN.
"WE'RE POPPIN' BOTTLES AT THE CLUB.
PULL UP, YOU JACKASS!" "WE'RE POPPIN' BOTTLES AT
THE CLUB.
PULL UP, YOU JACKASS!" James: WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR
NUMBER FOUR?
Nicole: I WANT HIM TO START AMERICAN, AND END BRITISH.
James: SO START AMERICAN, "WHERE POP AND BOTTLES AT THE
CLUB" AND THEN "TO ME IS UP."
"WE ARE POPPING BOTTLES AT THE CLUB, PUT KNEES UP YOU
MOPPET."
Nicole: BRITISH.
James: EITHER WAY HE IS HOLDING MY STAIR AND IT IS
SCARY.
NORMALLY WHEN SOMEONE SMILES THEY BECOME LESS INTIMIDATING,
THAT IS NOT THE CASE WITH NUMBE.
HE IS LOOKING LIKE THIS, AND THEN HE WENT--
OKAY.
LET'S MAKE A DECISION HERE, BRENDAN, NICOLE, NUMBER ONE
TREND, BRITISH OR AMERICAN, AUDIENCE, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
BRITISH.
Brendan: I THINK SHE IS AMERICAN, SHE HIT DEAD T IN
MOPPET IN A WEIRD WAY THAT MAKES ME THINK AMERICAN.
Nicole: MEN ARE SO CONFIDENT SOMETIMES--
I'M LIKE REALLY BUYING INTO IT.
SO I AM WITH YOU.
AMERICAN.
James: WE ARE GOING AMRICAN, ARE YOU FROM THE U.K.
OR THE USA?
I AM-- [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
James: NUMBER 2, WHAT DO WE THINK?
Nicole: I'M GOING TO SAY AMERICAN BECAUSE OF THE SHOES.
James: YOU DON'T THINK A BRITISH MAN WILL WEAR THOSE?
Nicole: I SURE DON'T, AND DON'T ASK ME WHY, BUT IN MY
HEART I DON'T FEEL IT.
Brendan: I WILL TRUST MY INSTINCTS, I GOT THE LAST ONE
TOTALLY WRONG, I THINK HE IS BRITISH.
James: NICOLE THINKS AMERICAN, BRENDAN THINKS
BRITISH.
ARE YOU FROM THE U.K. OR THE US USA?
I AM FROM-- Nicole: YES!
James: NUMBER 3, WHAT DO WE THINK?
Nicole: AMERICAN.
Brendan: BRITISH!
James: LET'S FIND OUT NUMBER 3, FROM THE U.K. OR THE
USA?
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] James: NUMBER 4, WHERE HAVE
YOU COMMITTED THE MAJORITY?
WHAT WE THINK, BRITISH OR AMERICAN?
Nicole: BRITISH.
Brendan: BRITISH.
James: THEY ARE GOING BRITISH, LET'S FIND OUT!
OH, HE IS AN AMERICAN!
WHICH BRINGS US TO NUMBER 5, NUMBER 5, BRITISH OR AMERICAN,
AUDIENCE, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
BRITISH.
James: THEY THINK BRITISH.
Nicole: AMERICAN.
Brendan: AMERICAN.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] James: THANK YOU TO OUR
CONTESTANTS.
THAT WAS "U.K. OR USA."
WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK!
OKAY, WELL, LET'S GET THIS VACATION STARTED.
WHERE'S THE OCEAN AT?
WE ARE AN OHIO VALLEY, THERE IS NO OCEAN.
WE ARE SURROUNDED BY THE MOUNTAINS THAT HAS A UNIQUE
ENERGY, ONLY PUNCTUATED BY ITS NATURE.
I HATE IT.
YOU THOUGHT THERE WAS AN OCEAN?
YES, THIS PLACE SOUNDS JAMAICAN, WELCOME TO OJAI.
IS IT AROUND?
AS LONG AS THERE IS A POOL, I'M GOOD.
THERE IS NO POOL.
♪ ♪ [APPLAUSE]
James: THAT WAS A CLIP FROM SEASON 2 OF "GRAND CREW" THAT
AIRS FRIDAYS AT 8:30 ON NBC, AND STREAMING THE NEXT DAY ON
PEACOCK.
CONGRATS ON THE SHOW.
FOR ANYONE WHO HASN'T CAUGHT IT YET, TELL US WHAT THE SHOW IS
ABOUT AND WHO YOU PLAY.
Nicole: IT IS ABOUT SIX FRIENDS WHO ARE PROFESSIONALS,
LATE 30s, MID 30s, EARLY 40s, SOME ARE MARRIED, SOME
ARE SINGLE.
WE HANG OUT AT THE WINE BAR, TALK ABOUT LOVE AND
RELATIONSHIPS AND STUFF.
I PLAY NIKKI, NIKKI IS KIND OF HORNY.
SHE IS BASED ON ME.
[LAUGHS] THE GREATER THE SHOW IS LIKE A
DEER FRIEND OF MINE AND WROTE THE PART FOR ME.
AND IT'S A SUPER FUN SHOW.
AND THATOJAI BIT IS REAL, I WENT WITH HIM AND I SAID, WHERE
THE OCEAN AT?
AND HE WAS LIKE HEY, FRIEND, DO YOU KNOW ABOUT GEOGRAPHY?
AND I WAS LIKE NO, BITCH.
THERE IS NO OCEAN IN OJAI.
NOW, YOU'RE RIGHT IN THE MOUNTAINS.
IT TAKES PLACE IN A WINE BAR, WHERE IS THE WORST PLACE YOU
HAVE BEEN DRUNK?
Nicole: I HAVE TO SAY THE GYM.
SO...
[LAUGHTER] I CAN CLARIFY.
IN MY EARLY 20s, LATE 20s, TILL PROBABLY LAST WEEK I USED
TO KEEP A BOTTLE OF VODKA AND A WATER BOTTLE FOR JUST IN CASE OF
EMERGENCIES.
YOU KNOW HOW YOU LIKE SAY YES TO SOMETHING AND YOU'RE LIKE I
DON'T REALLY WANT TO GO.
OKAY, NOW I FEEL LIKE HANGING OUT.
James: I AM AWARE OF THAT FEELING COMING US.
Nicole: SO I HEADED IN MY CAR JUST IN CASE AND WAS WORKING
OUT WITH MY TRAINER AND WAS LOOKING IN THE BACKSEAT AND I
WAS LIKE HERE'S WATER.
BROUGHT IT IN.
ANY MEAN WE DO THE STAIRS BECAUSE I WAS LATE.
AND I WAS LIKE I NEED TO STOP I NEED SOME WATER.
CHUG DATE.
MID CHUG I WAS LIKE, THAT AIN'T WATER.
AND SWALLOWED IT BECAUSE I'M NOT WASTING IT.
James: OF COURSE.
Nicole: WE KEPT WORKING OUT FOR A LITTLE BIT.
AND I WAS LIKE I DON'T THINK I CAN KEEP DOING THIS.
SO I JUST WENT HOME AND HAD A NICE DAY.
James: THAT'S A BEAUTIFUL STORY!
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL STORY.
NOW BEFORE WE GO, BRENDAN, YOU ARE A BIG FOOTBALL FAN.
SO MUCH SO THAT WE CAN CALL IT FOOTBALL, BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT IT
IS CALLED.
YOU ARE ALSO A VERY TALENTED HULA-HOOP.
I DON'T KNOW IF PEOPLE KNEW THIS, WE THOUGHT WE WOULD TEST
YOUR FOOTBALL, SOCCER KNOWLEDGE.
BUT WE ARE GOING TO RAISE THE STAKES.
WE HAVE A HULA-HOOP HERE.
OKAY, SO, CAN BRENDAN HUNT ANSWER THREE FOOTBALL TRIVIA
QUESTIONS CORRECTLY WHILE MAINTAINING AN ACTIVE HULA-HOOP?
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE CAPABLE OF THIS?
Brendan: I'M GOING TO TRY!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] OKAY!
OKAY.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ALL RIGHTS!
QUESTION 1.
ERLING HAALAND IS TOP OF THE PREMIER LEAGUE SCORING CHARTS
THIS SEASON.
WHO ARE SECOND AND THIRD?
Brendan: GREAT QUESTION.
I'M GOING TO GO WITH HARRY KANE AND--
NOT TERESA NELSON.
NOT GABRIELLE, I DON'T KNOW!
James: PLACE FOR BRADFORD.
Brendan: TONY!
James: I WILL GIVE IT TO YOU!
QUESTION TWO.
THIS WEST HAM ICON AND FORMER CAPTAIN RETIRED AT THE END OF
LAST SEASON, WHAT WAS HIS NAME?
Brendan: MARK NO FOUL.
James: AND THIS IS IT.
HOW MANY TIMES HAS THE US MENS NATIONAL TEAM BEATEN ENGLAND?
Brendan: ONCE.
James: IT IS WRONG, IT IS TWICE!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] BRENDAN HUNT, EVERYBODY!
PLEASE THANK BRENDAN HUNT AND NICOLE BYER!
WE WILL BE BACK WITH MORE "THE LATE LATE SHOW"!
♪ ♪ James: WELCOME BACK, OUR
NEXT █GUEST IS A BRILLIANT&-úST, , AND I WAS LIKE, NO, I AM STILL
WORKING AND A FRIEND TRIED TO CONVINCE ME, BECAUSE WE ARE
JEWISH-- AND WE WERE ON A SKI LIFT WHEN
HE SAID IT.
[LAUGHTER] I AM JEWISH, AND A REALLY HAVE
THE JEWISH LOOK, I DON'T THINK.
I THINK IT'S MY HAIR.
I HAVE CHRISTIAN HAIR, DON'T I?
I MEAN, THIS IS GOOD NEIGHBOR HAIR.
THIS IS MISSIONARY HAIR!
OCCUPATIONALLY AND,, IT IS MISSIONARY HAIR.
IF I PULLED OUT A GUITAR, YOU WOULD BE LIKE, THAT'S GOING TO
BE ABOUT JESUS FOR SURE!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] THANK YOU.
I AM WORKING ON MYSELF TOO, I'M TRYING TO LEARN HOW TO STICK UP
FOR MYSELF ALL BECAUSE I'M NOT GOOD AT THAT.
I CAN HANDLE CONFRONTATIONS.
I'M NOT A CONFRONTATIONAL GUY.
I WATCHED A MAN STEAL MY BIKE ONE TIME.
HE WAS NOT IN A RUSH OR ANYTHING.
HE DID IT SO CONFIDENTLY, I WAS LIKE, THAT MIGHT BE HIS BIKE
ACTUALLY.
I CALLED THE COPS, THEY ASKED IF THERE WAS WITNESSES.
I HAD TO SAY "SPEAKING."
IT WAS HUMILIATING.
I'M NOT A CONFRONTATIONAL DUDE, I DATED A WOMAN FOR SIX WEEKS
AND SHE THOUGHT MY NAME IS LOGAN THE WHOLE TIME.
I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO BREAK IT TO HER.
I CAME UP WITH A PLAN, I WAS LIKE I WILL BRING HER AROUND MY
FRIENDS, THINKING MY FRIENDS WOULD SAY MY NAME IN
CONVERSATION, BUT I TOLD MY FRIENDS THE PLAN, NOW THEY CALL
ME LOGAN FOREVER.
I'VE NEVER BEEN GOOD AT RELATIONSHIPS THOUGH, I THINK
IT'S BECAUSE MY PARENTS ARE DIVORCED, SO I NEVER HAD GOOD
ROLE MODELS FOR LOVE OR RELATIONSHIPS, THE FIRST TIME I
SAW MY FRIENDS PARENTS KISS I WAS LIKE "THEY FIGHT WEIRD."
BUT I LOVE MY MOM, LOVE HER TO DEATH.
SHE IS ON INSTAGRAM, I BLOCKED HER PRETTY IMMEDIATELY.
SHE WON'T STOP DMA AND ME MOTIVATIONAL PICTURES.
SHE SENT ME AN IMAGE OF A BUMBLEBEE AND THEN AND CURSIVE
OVER THE BUMBLE LEAD BUMBLEBEE IT SAID "BE WHO YOU WANT TO BE."
AND NOW I WANT TO BE AN ORPHAN.
THAT'S WHERE I'M AT.
THAT'S MY MOM, AND THAT MY DAD, HE IS NOT ON INSTAGRAM.
HE IS ON A DIFFERENT APP, IT'S CALLED VOICE MAIL.
VERY INTO THE VOICE MAIL, MY DAD.
EVERY DAY I GET A NEW VOICE MAIL FROM MY DAD, NEVER ONCE HAS THEM
BRING VALUABLE INFORMATION.
HE STICKS TO THE STUFF ON MY PHONE ALREADY.
HE WILL BE LIKE "HEY, SON, IT'S ME.
YOUR DAD.
AND I'M CALLING YOU AT 2:37 P.M.
PACIFIC ON WEDNESDAY, MARCH 4TH.
AND THE WEATHER IS FAIR, HIGH OF 73, LOW 62.
THE NASDAQ IS DOWN SIX POINTS.
ANYWAYS, GO AHEAD AND GIVE ME A CALL BACK AT AREA CODE 510--"
I LOVE MY DAD, HE IS GETTING OLDER AND SO HE HAS RETIRED.
BUT HE IS NOTHING INTERESTING TO SAY.
HIS BIG SECRET AND REVEAL IS THAT HE SMOKES WEED.
BUT I HAVE KNOWN MY DAD SMOKED WEED SINCE THE FIRST TIME I
SMOKED WEED, BECAUSE I WAS LIKE, "THIS WEED SMELLS LIKE MY DAD."
I AM ORION LEVINE, THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] James: ORION LEVINE,
EVERYBODY!
SEE HIM LIVE JUNE 30TH AT THE LINCOLN LODGE IN CHICAGO.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
WELL DONE, MAN!
James: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING!
TOMORROW NIGHT ZACHARY LEVI, KERRY WASHINGTON,
AND DELROY LINDO.
WE HOPE YOU WILL JOIN US, REGGIE, TAKE US HOME!