-Boogity boogity! -(GASPING)
You have disturbed the slumber of Sobek!
Put that back, Matt. You are such a child.
I am not Matt, I am Sobek! Guardian of this tomb!
Do not mock me, and do not mock my pharaoh!
Do not mock how many cats he had!
So many cats.
Do not mock his man-dals!
And never, ever mock his unnecessarily long, pointy beard.
(SLOWLY) Pointy.
Matt, I wouldn't get near that thing.
You know the legends about the wrath of Sobek.
Ooh, wrath, no wrath. Wrath, no wrath.
Wrath, no wrath.
-Wrath... -(SCREAMING)
Wow, you freak out too easy.
-(GROWLING) -Aah!
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
SCOOBY-DOO: Scooby-Dooby-Doo!
FRED: Supposedly, the museum's mystery exhibit is the largest collection of
historical detective paraphernalia ever made visible to the public.
We are going on a guided tour through the entire history of mystery solving.
Not to mention the cool new Ancient Egyptian exhibit that's opening today.
Hey, good idea!
Let's not mention that, because that's not why we're going.
Then why are we going?
To see the history of mystery.
Not to mention the Egyptian exhibit.
Hey, we agreed not to mention that.
Mention what?
-The Egyptian exhibit. -You just mentioned it!
Oh, I thought only Velma couldn't mention it.
No, no one should mention it!
No mentioning by anyone.
Mention what?
FRED: (SIGHING) We're here.
SCOOBY-DOO: Where?
Welcome to the History of Mystery.
My name is Jeff, and I'll be your tour guide.
Are you ready to learn about mystery solving throughout the ages?
-Absolutely! -KIDS: Yeah!
Does Fred know this is a tour for children?
So, let me ask you, have any of you guys ever come across a real mystery?
FRED: Of course.
The gang and I are actually out there in the field solving mysteries all the time.
(CLATTERING)
-Really? -(VELMA GROANING)
Oh, well, don't let the destruction of those rare antiquities fool you.
They're really a crack detective team.
(GLASS BREAKING)
Maybe a poor choice of words.
Yeah, it really looks like you're in command of the situation.
(GLASS BREAKING)
What, this? They're off duty.
If there was an actual mystery here, things would be completely different.
Fairly different.
But there is a mystery here.
Last night, two security guards were attacked by the Ancient Egyptian deity Sobek.
Oh. Well, gang, it looks like we have a mystery on our hands.
-SCOOBY-DOO: (ECHOING) Who said that? -(SIGHS)
See, kids? Mystery solving can be difficult without strong leadership.
Well, maybe you should try leading a team and solving this mystery.
That's a great idea.
In fact, maybe I should borrow your team and show them
the benefits of effective leadership.
Oh, by all means.
If you think leadership is the problem,
I'd like to see you do better.
-You're on. -Oh, great.
Then I will just pass on my vast experiential knowledge of mystery solving
to these incredibly lucky short people.
-They're children. -That's to be determined.
All right, gang. Listen up.
Jeff's gonna take over for me on this one.
So, you'll be listening to him.
SHAGGY: (ECHOING) Aw, like, Fred thinks
we listen to him.
I don't know about this, Fred.
Look, we're just letting Jeff try his hand at real mystery solving.
So, don't pull any punches.
Shaggy, Scooby, make sure to be constantly scared and hungry.
SHAGGY: Check! SCOOBY-DOO: Double check!
Velma, don't forget to be a tactless know-it-all.
I'm the tactless one?
-SCOOBY-DOO: Duh. -Done.
And Daphne, do you have some irrational thing you're doing today for no apparent reason?
No.
(FALCON SCREECHING)
I've taken up falconry.
Perfect!
Well, Jeff, they're all yours.
Now, are you kids ready to learn about mysteries?
-Yeah! -Why not?
We already answered this.
All right, gang. It looks like we've got a mystery on our hands.
Wow, that really does roll off the tongue, doesn't it?
Look, no offense, Jeff,
but the excitement of trying to solve your first mystery
could very well interfere with your judgment as leader.
Whoa, I'm not here to tell you how to do your thing.
We're in this together.
And you've got the most experience,
so, what do you think our first step should be?
Oh, um, thanks for asking.
The first step in something like this is usually examining the scene of the first attack.
Then that's what we'll do. Let's go, gang.
Okay, kids. So, what do you think their first step really should've been?
Okay, this is the site of the first attack.
I wonder why Sobek has decided to appear now.
-(GASPING) -I know exactly why Sobek has come.
We've mishandled the tomb of his pharaoh.
This is Professor Hess, the museum's Egyptologist.
Oh, please, don't start that again.
And this is Professor Salazar, the museum's other Egyptologist.
Sobek is a myth.
It's simply two tired security guards' eyes playing tricks on them.
Ooh! Look at the scientist dismissing empirical evidence
because the facts don't match her close-minded world view.
Close-minded?
Because I don't believe in fairy tales?
You're thinking like a loopy thing, quail, foot, owl.
Oh, yeah?
-That's big talk from a snake with horns, lasso, lion! -(GASPING)
Um, what's happening?
They're arguing in hieroglyphics.
It's a well-known fact in the science community
that all Egyptologists hate each other.
-You're a camel, bowl! -I don't have to listen to this!
So long, lion, cloth folded like mouth.
Okay, so, what do we know about this Sobek guy?
I'm glad you asked.
Sobek is a crocodile deity who remained popular in Ancient Egypt
from the Old Kingdom era to the time of Cleopatra.
Egyptologists disagree about his exact nature.
Some think he was a violent, erratic god,
while others think he was tasked with guarding the pharaohs.
He's associated with eating people,
or conversely, healing people.
He either unites or dismembers, depending on who you ask.
You know how Egyptologists are.
Look, Dwayne. Maybe it's your ancestor.
(FALCON SCREECHING)
So, Daphne, do you always bring a falcon on mysteries?
What? No. Don't be silly.
I've brought puppets, fake beards, a banjo,
this would be my first falcon.
(BOTH WHIMPERING)
Um, Jeff, sir.
So, like, Scoob and I were wondering if we could go investigate
a slightly less terrifying part of the museum.
I understand, Shaggy. This is pretty scary.
But I can tell you two are our best weapons.
You're both fine-tuned to recognize when danger is near.
I'll tell you what, you help us search for clues,
and if you sense any trouble, I'll be right behind you running out of here, okay?
Like, we're your chickens in a coal mine, sir!
Wow, he harnessed the power of cowardice and used it to our advantage.
(SNIFFING)
-(GASPS) -Hmm.
(BOTH YELP)
Um, guys?
Why are there two Sobek statues?
Two? There's usually only one.
-This looks like our first clue. -Almost definitely.
Three?
(GROWLING)
Three's not a clue, three's a problem!
(WHIMPERING)
Yeah, like, I'd like to officially report danger!
(GROWLING)
(ALL PANTING)
(GROWLING)
Quick, we can hide in the History of Camouflage exhibit!
(GROWLING SOFTLY)
(JEFF SIGHING)
Phew.
(GROWLS)
-(BOTH SIGHING IN RELIEF) -I can't believe we were just
attacked by an Ancient Egyptian deity.
Ah, you get used to it.
Now, in the '50s, our modern idea of the teenager took shape.
Paving the way for the teen detective.
And with them, the fun starts.
Um, excuse me, Mr. Tour Guide Stranger, sir.
Will this fun include lunch?
Ha, I see we have ourselves a little Shaggy.
Is that a yes?
Hmm, I hope Big Shaggy's okay.
Maybe we should check on him.
I mean, he's probably terrified being led by such an amateur not-me leader.
But I have low blood sugar.
That's a good one, Jeff. I never thought of fingerprints that way before.
(LAUGHING)
-There's truth in humor. -I know, right? Okay, back to business.
What do you think Sobek could be after?
Well, according to legend, he's known as a protector, but of what, I'm not sure.
I know what Sobek is trying to protect.
According to my research, there isn't a mummy inside the sarcophagus.
-There's a solid gold statue. -(FALCON SCREECHES)
Why not just open it up and find out?
Are you mad?
Tampering with the sarcophagus is what summons the monster!
These Sobek attacks are because Salazar has been preparing to open it.
Oh, please, everyone knows that sarcophagus is as empty as your theories.
Oh, yeah? Well, lion, lasso, lion to you!
It's more like, quail, man touching his nose, foot, quail, oaf!
Hey, gang, it looks like things aren't going too well, huh?
Actually, Jeff is a born leader.
Well, you know, there's always a learning curve with these things.
-So, don't beat yourselves up too much. -(COUGHS)
No, like, he's great.
He listens to us, and he even lets us eat.
We're living the dream.
Yeah, he's brilliant. Jeff says the way to lead is to trust your team.
Like me and Dwayne here. We've developed a strong trust as well.
-Watch this. -(FALCON SCREECHES)
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
Oops.
Okay, so how much trouble could a loose falcon cause in a natural history museum?
(WOMAN SCREAMING)
Ah, it's cool, Daphne.
What would life be without unexpected detours, right?
Come on, gang. After that falcon.
SCOOBY-DOO: We'll eat later. DAPHNE: So long, Fred!
You know, kids, I'm worried they won't be able to solve this mystery without me.
It looks like they're doing great.
Yeah, you're right, we should lend them a hand. Are you with me?
-Yeah, sure! -Now I'm afraid, and I'm still hungry.
-Oh, Little Shaggy. -My name is Duncan.
That's the spirit.
(GROANING)
(FALCON SCREECHING)
He was just after that stuffed mouse.
Like, it looks like your bird thought that mouse was real.
Not too bright, huh, Scoob?
It's sad, really.
BOTH: Yikes!
Oh, it's just some model alligators.
(BOTH WHIMPERING)
Hey, Jeff, notice anything strange?
Looks like clue numero two.
-(WHIMPERING CONTINUES) -(FALCON SCREECHES)
Yeah, Dwayne, sad. Really.
All right, Kid Gang, let's search for clues.
Whee!
I'm a detective!
You know, there's a lot more to being a detective
than yelling, "Whee! I'm a detective!"
(KIDS LAUGHING)
Come on kids, focus.
Didn't you learn anything from my tour?
ALL: No, not really.
(SIGHING)
Not listening to me is what Big Gang would always do.
Man, I could really use them right now.
Normally, this is where Velma would point out a clue that
only she sees because of some arcane knowledge.
Hmm...
Hi there, you look pretty smart.
-Although there's something missing. -(GIRL LAUGHING)
Hey, I can't see!
(DISTANT CLATTERING)
FRED: There, now that's better.
Look around for any smarty-pants clues, Little Velma.
Now I can't see.
-(CRASHING) -Ow!
-JEFF: Hey, Fred. -Nothing.
Oh, hello. I hope the mystery is going well.
(SNAPS)
It is. Thanks for asking.
You're welcome for asking.
What a coincidence that we'd run into each other here.
After all, I'm not, like, trying to solve the mystery before you
using these kids as a replacement gang.
-Because that is something a silly person would do... -(CRASHING)
...and I am a very reasonable man.
Did you give that girl her own falcon?
It's a pigeon, I think.
Enough of this delightful, potentially humiliating banter.
So, kids, the best way to learn about solving mysteries is to learn
what not to do by watching other people's mistakes.
Oh, no, please, continue your investigation.
Now, pay very close attention, kids.
Uh, thanks, Fred.
So, gang, we heard the Egyptologists say there might be
a gold statue inside the sarcophagus.
Maybe this tomb is a key to unlocking the mystery.
(CHUCKLING)
I think if there was any connection between the sarcophagus and the monster,
Little Velma here would've already spotted it.
(GROANING)
DAPHNE AND SHAGGY: Huh? JEFF: Uh...
Uh, maybe you shouldn't mess around with that thing.
Didn't the Egyptologists say Sobek protects it?
Like I said, Egyptologists say a lot of things.
Mostly to contradict each other.
-(GROWLING) -(SCREAMING)
(GROWLING)
Run!
All right, gang. Like we practiced.
Evasive maneuvers!
ALL: Right!
Really? You pay attention to his evasive maneuver plans?
Kid Gang, also do that thing they're doing.
(GRUNTING)
(BOTH YELLING)
(WAKE ME UP TO SAY GOODNIGHT PLAYING)
(GROWLING)
-(FALCON SCREECHING) -Okay, Dwayne, that's getting old.
Okay, fine, I admit it.
I was using these kids as a replacement gang
so I could solve the mystery before Jeff and prove I'm as good a leader as him.
-No duh. -Like, we know.
-It was pretty obvious. -Tell me about it.
Welcome to the big boy table, Fred.
It's cool, Fred.
I think I have a pretty good idea of what's going on here,
but honestly, I have no idea how to catch this Sobek guy.
I agree with Jeff that things may not be what they appear to be.
I believe the answer to stopping him is
for all of us to join forces and compare notes.
Really? The lesson here is, "teamwork is good"?
I could've told you that, and I'm 10.
What are you? Like, 50?
Okay, I'm much, much younger than that.
And also, quiet, you.
Now, what clues do we have so far?
You know the plan.
Shaggy, Scooby, you two will be the bait.
-Like, sure thing. -You're the boss.
How did you do that?
Fred, there's a difference between saying words and speaking words.
Like, hey, Scoob.
Look, let's touch this tomb thingy.
Touch, touch, touch!
Yeah, random touching. Touch, touch, touch.
Gee, like I hope all this messing around with the cursed sacred relic
doesn't turn out to be a bad idea.
Don't be silly.
-(GROWLING) -(WHIMPERING)
Like, our haphazard tomb-touching plan has backfired horribly!
Run!
(GROWLING)
-(SCREAMING) -(GROWLING)
-Get him, Dwayne! -Get him, Junior!
Now!
Great work, everyone.
Yeah, now let's see who's really under this mask.
ALL: Professor Salazar?
It all makes perfect sense.
It certainly does.
Yup. And Jeff, you led this case,
so you should have the honor of telling everyone how we figured it out.
Thanks, Fred.
We knew that Sobek was scaring people away from the Egyptian exhibit. But why?
Well, the first clue was
the second statue we found on the scene.
-Exactly. -That could only mean one thing.
Yep. And that is...
Sobek was kidnapping barbers and transforming them into statues to appease
the angry corn people of Kathmandu.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait. Corn people? What?
It all came together when the falcon found the mouse in the storeroom.
This revealed that Sobek was clearly trying to stop the wind.
All wind. Forever!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Uh, maybe I should take over here.
But of course, the real puppetmasters
were the red leprechauns that haunt my every waking moment.
Okay, that definitely didn't happen.
And so, clearly, as anyone can see,
Professor Salazar is really Mr. Peterson, my third grade teacher who said that
I'd never climb Mt. Everest's invisible twin,
Mt. Flappy McFlunken!
Why won't this Professor Salazar mask come off?
Reveal yourself, Mr. Peterson!
Wow, I thought we were reading the same things into those clues,
but, uh, okay, no, you are really bad at this.
Obviously, Salazar knew there was a gold statue in the sarcophagus.
She wanted to steal it and finally escape the brutal world of Egyptology,
so she used the legend of Sobek to shut down the exhibit.
JEFF: Wrong!
VELMA: She used parts from an alligator display to make her costume.
The deity Sobek had a crocodile head instead of an alligator,
a detail most people wouldn't notice.
She removed the gold statue from the tomb and hid it in the Egyptian exhibit.
She was going to sneak it out of the museum.
And I would've gotten away with it too,
if it wasn't for you meddling, and in your case, crazy and misguided, kids!
My plan was perfect.
Sobek is even the patron god of robbers!
Ha! Your scholarly research is as shoddy as your attempts at crime.
Sobek was a guardian deity.
I don't have to listen to your poorly sourced nonsense.
Take me away!
Oh, no, you don't! Take me away too.
I'm going downtown with you to keep explaining how wrong you are in jail.
Ha-ha! Lion, snake, snake, river!
Well, I feel like that went really well.
Great, great, I'm glad you had fun.
Yeah, I think I'm going to quit my job at the museum
and finally take up mystery solving full-time.
I've even got my own Mystery Gang.
You kids ready to put an end to the red leprechaun conspiracy once and for all?
-ALL: Yeah! -Come on, to the flying cat-copter!
Well, gang, you guys did great.
I'm sorry I doubted you, and myself.
Like, it's okay, Fred.
There's no other leader I'd rather try to avoid listening to than you.
For real.
Yeah, Fred.
You might say we're all perched on your arm.
And in the end, no matter how crazy it gets,
you always have everything under control.
JEFF: Scooby-Dooby-Doo!
Hey! Hey, hey, hey!