1
00:00:00,875 --> 00:00:04,379
[jaunty string music]

2
00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,091
[laughing]

3
00:00:08,258 --> 00:00:10,843
Good morning, lovebirds.
Hi.

4
00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:12,845
Bad news, the Adelmans' flight
was cancelled,

5
00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:14,931
so you might have to re-tweak
the seating chart.

6
00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:17,684
Okay.
[sighs]

7
00:00:17,934 --> 00:00:19,601
So we're gonna need to
find a new spot

8
00:00:19,602 --> 00:00:22,312
for, uh, Tom's in-laws,
Ed and Trish.

9
00:00:22,313 --> 00:00:24,440
Okay.
Who do they know?

10
00:00:24,441 --> 00:00:28,027
Uh, maybe one of the uncles at
the uncles and teachers table.

11
00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:29,862
Good!
Good, done.

12
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:32,656
Uh, next up is Julie F.

13
00:00:32,657 --> 00:00:34,284
She's my mom's dentist.

14
00:00:34,451 --> 00:00:37,870
Your--your mom's dentist.
Who does she know?

15
00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:40,164
Uh, I'm gonna put her at
the West Coast relatives table.

16
00:00:40,165 --> 00:00:42,041
Cool, cool.
That just leaves us

17
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:44,294
with a spot to find for Mark.

18
00:00:44,461 --> 00:00:45,836
Who does he know?
Uh, no one.

19
00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:46,962
He, uh, woke up this morning

20
00:00:46,963 --> 00:00:48,922
after being in a coma since 1987.

21
00:00:48,923 --> 00:00:50,758
Oh. [sighs]
Okay, uh,

22
00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:52,968
could we squeeze him at a table
with one of your coworkers?

23
00:00:52,969 --> 00:00:55,220
[sighs] I mean, all those guys
talk about is basketball.

24
00:00:55,221 --> 00:00:56,472
Mark won't know
any of the players.

25
00:00:56,473 --> 00:00:57,514
Most of them weren't even born

26
00:00:57,515 --> 00:00:58,807
when the air conditioner
fell on his head.

27
00:00:58,808 --> 00:01:00,434
Who shrunk this television?

28
00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:01,811
We could put him on our table?

29
00:01:02,395 --> 00:01:05,481
Okay, well, to be honest,
we're not that close.

30
00:01:05,482 --> 00:01:07,357
Like, I've hung out with him
a few times,

31
00:01:07,358 --> 00:01:09,401
help the orderlies
trim his nails and stuff,

32
00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:11,904
but never like a real
conversation conversation.

33
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,489
But he is family, right?
That's true.

34
00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:14,990
Hey, uh, cousin Mark.
Hi.

35
00:01:14,991 --> 00:01:16,367
Who are you people?

36
00:01:16,868 --> 00:01:18,952
Cool.
Yeah, that's--that's good.

37
00:01:18,953 --> 00:01:21,955
What are we gonna do?
[whispers] Ah, man.

38
00:01:21,956 --> 00:01:24,291
Oh, why don't we put him at
the coma patients table?

39
00:01:24,292 --> 00:01:25,292
[gasps]

40
00:01:25,293 --> 00:01:26,835
[clank]
[yells]

41
00:01:26,836 --> 00:01:30,255
Terrific idea. I don't know why
I didn't think of it immediately.

42
00:01:30,256 --> 00:01:33,259
[downtempo electronic music]

43
00:01:34,260 --> 00:01:35,678
Ah!

44
00:01:38,973 --> 00:01:41,059
[squeaks]

45
00:01:42,727 --> 00:01:44,104
[growls]

46
00:02:01,412 --> 00:02:03,956
{\an8}Jesus Christ,
does it have to be so tight?

47
00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:05,791
{\an8}Well, as the old saying goes,

48
00:02:05,792 --> 00:02:09,253
{\an8}a snug bowtie means
a snug marriage...

49
00:02:09,254 --> 00:02:11,463
{\an8}Right.
Is in the cards

50
00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:13,590
{\an8}for the two of you.
Uh--okay.

51
00:02:13,591 --> 00:02:16,135
{\an8}Good news, gentlemen,
the gas station down the street

52
00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:18,637
{\an8}has a wide selection
of bum wine.

53
00:02:18,638 --> 00:02:20,139
{\an8}There's a bar open downstairs.

54
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:22,308
{\an8}Eh, it's not open.
Trust me, I've been checking.

55
00:02:22,559 --> 00:02:23,600
{\an8}That's curious.

56
00:02:23,601 --> 00:02:24,643
{\an8}Could've sworn
Lucy and I told them

57
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:25,979
{\an8}to open at noon.

58
00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:27,354
{\an8}Ah, don't worry about it, Josh,

59
00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:29,815
{\an8}you--you two had
so much to organize.

60
00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:32,985
There was bound to be
a couple of oopsy-daisies.

61
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:35,989
[eerie music]

62
00:02:37,699 --> 00:02:39,783
Ow, God, Mom,

63
00:02:39,784 --> 00:02:42,119
how did you ever walk down
the aisle in these?

64
00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:43,453
Very carefully.

65
00:02:43,454 --> 00:02:46,165
Hey, Lucy, wasn't there
supposed to be a vegan option

66
00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:47,666
for dinner tonight?
There should be. Why?

67
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:49,334
Is it not on the menu?

68
00:02:49,335 --> 00:02:51,713
Both these entrees have
cream sauces.

69
00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:53,922
You know Robin's
extremely lactose intolerant.

70
00:02:53,923 --> 00:02:56,383
It's fine.
No, it isn't, Robin.

71
00:02:56,384 --> 00:02:58,844
You get torrential diarrhea.

72
00:02:58,845 --> 00:03:02,431
I can just take
Monday off from work.

73
00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:03,932
Monday and Tuesday.

74
00:03:03,933 --> 00:03:05,142
No, Robin, you shouldn't
have to do that.

75
00:03:05,143 --> 00:03:06,894
There should be a vegan option.

76
00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:08,562
I swear Josh and I
asked for one.

77
00:03:08,563 --> 00:03:10,314
Don't worry about it, darling,

78
00:03:10,315 --> 00:03:12,816
you and Josh had
so much to plan.

79
00:03:12,817 --> 00:03:15,987
There was bound to be
a couple of oopsy-daisies.

80
00:03:20,533 --> 00:03:23,536
[ringtone chiming]

81
00:03:24,996 --> 00:03:25,913
Hey.
Hey.

82
00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:27,414
Can you meet me downstairs?

83
00:03:27,415 --> 00:03:29,082
I think there's
something weird going on.

84
00:03:29,083 --> 00:03:31,376
See? We did ask for
the bar to be open.

85
00:03:31,377 --> 00:03:32,961
And we did ask for a vegan option.

86
00:03:32,962 --> 00:03:36,131
And what the hell are
these boring table settings?

87
00:03:36,132 --> 00:03:38,050
What happened to the funky
mismatched plates

88
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:39,801
we got from the thrift store?

89
00:03:39,802 --> 00:03:41,595
[laughs]

90
00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:42,512
Josh.
What?

91
00:03:42,513 --> 00:03:44,390
Since when does my mom
hang out with your stepdad?

92
00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:45,641
Something's amiss.

93
00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:48,561
[stealthy funk music]

94
00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:59,656
[dramatic music]

95
00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:07,412
I hereby call to order

96
00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:10,582
this meeting of
the shadow wedding planners.

97
00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:14,127
As you all know,
it is our sworn duty

98
00:04:14,128 --> 00:04:16,004
to secretly control

99
00:04:16,005 --> 00:04:19,758
every aspect of this wedding.

100
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:22,094
Together, we will transform it

101
00:04:22,095 --> 00:04:25,181
from a young cool person's thing

102
00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:28,767
into a normal traditional wedding,

103
00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:32,605
where everything is normal and nice.

104
00:04:32,855 --> 00:04:35,274
Brother Jim,
any updates on the reception?

105
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:36,275
Yes, Sister Patti.

106
00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:38,653
The pre-ceremony bar
has been closed.

107
00:04:38,987 --> 00:04:42,447
The confusing vegan option
has been stricken from the menu.

108
00:04:42,448 --> 00:04:45,076
And the funky mismatch plates

109
00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:47,786
are no more!

110
00:04:47,787 --> 00:04:49,913
[plates shatter]
[gasps]

111
00:04:49,914 --> 00:04:52,624
By the time our work is done,

112
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:56,920
this will be the most normal
and nice wedding

113
00:04:56,921 --> 00:05:00,925
in the history
of Evanston, Illinois!

114
00:05:01,342 --> 00:05:03,135
Yep,
straight down the middle.

115
00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:05,722
[all laugh]
You monsters!

116
00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:09,225
This is our wedding! We planned it.

117
00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:12,228
[all cackling]

118
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:22,112
Oh, Josh.
Oh, Lucy.

119
00:05:22,113 --> 00:05:24,740
You didn't plan this wedding.

120
00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:27,451
From the very beginning,
you've just been our puppets.

121
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,745
Like wind-up dolls,
unaware that we were the ones

122
00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:31,371
spinning your gears.

123
00:05:31,372 --> 00:05:36,252
Or like when a dog thinks
he's the one driving the car.

124
00:05:39,630 --> 00:05:43,009
The point is,
behind the scenes,

125
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,302
the real wedding decisions

126
00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:48,222
have always been made by us.

127
00:05:48,556 --> 00:05:50,600
But what about
the wedding that we want?

128
00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:52,434
It's too late.

129
00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:56,730
The wedding we want
starts in four hours.

130
00:05:56,731 --> 00:06:00,233
[all cackling]

131
00:06:00,234 --> 00:06:02,402
Throw them out!
[demonic voice] Out!

132
00:06:02,403 --> 00:06:03,779
Wow, oh, okay.
Oh, God, okay.

133
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:06,198
To ultimate power!

134
00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:07,825
all: Power!
[cackles]

135
00:06:11,662 --> 00:06:13,164
This is blood.

136
00:06:13,956 --> 00:06:16,751
Ow.
Jesus. [groans]

137
00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:19,003
And don't come back.

138
00:06:19,337 --> 00:06:20,922
[door slams shut]

139
00:06:22,590 --> 00:06:24,966
I'm your cousin, by the way,
from Arizona.

140
00:06:24,967 --> 00:06:26,676
I--I don't know
if you recognize me.

141
00:06:26,677 --> 00:06:29,554
It's been a really long time.
No, I--I know who you are.

142
00:06:29,555 --> 00:06:31,807
Uh, Morris, good to see you.

143
00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:34,810
Uh, so did you have
a good trip up here?

144
00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:36,853
The flight in was--
was really great.

145
00:06:36,854 --> 00:06:38,438
Okay, good.
Good.

146
00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:41,316
The drive to the airport
wasn't so good.

147
00:06:41,317 --> 00:06:42,984
You know, traffic.

148
00:06:42,985 --> 00:06:44,362
Yeah.

149
00:06:48,783 --> 00:06:51,785
Sometimes, you know,
the drive is really great,

150
00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:54,496
and then the flight
isn't so good,

151
00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:56,790
but this, uh--
this was the opposite.

152
00:06:56,791 --> 00:06:58,708
This was--this was the opposite.
Right.

153
00:06:58,709 --> 00:07:00,336
Cool.
both: Yeah.

154
00:07:01,337 --> 00:07:03,131
Mazel tov.

155
00:07:04,298 --> 00:07:05,466
[door slams shut]

156
00:07:08,469 --> 00:07:11,471
[groans]
I know!

157
00:07:11,472 --> 00:07:14,015
I--I really wanted out wedding
to feel like--like us, you know,

158
00:07:14,016 --> 00:07:15,559
and--and now it's just gonna be

159
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:17,352
a bunch of shit
that our parents want,

160
00:07:17,353 --> 00:07:20,690
like that guy.

161
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:23,358
Who the hell's that again?
That's the pastor they hired

162
00:07:23,359 --> 00:07:25,236
to make sure everything goes
the way they want it to.

163
00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:30,365
Well, what--

164
00:07:30,366 --> 00:07:33,535
what if we told him his services
were no longer required?

165
00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:35,370
What about our parents?
They--they-they want--

166
00:07:35,371 --> 00:07:36,830
Who cares what
our parents want.

167
00:07:36,831 --> 00:07:40,751
This is our wedding, Lucy.

168
00:07:40,918 --> 00:07:42,544
Let's take it back.

169
00:07:42,545 --> 00:07:44,379
Okay, is everybody clear
on what they're doing?

170
00:07:44,380 --> 00:07:45,922
all: Yeah.
Mm-hmm.

171
00:07:45,923 --> 00:07:47,340
Awesome.
Okay, you guys are the best. Ready?

172
00:07:47,341 --> 00:07:49,009
All right, on three.
Let's do this!

173
00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:50,677
Revised
wedding plan on three.

174
00:07:50,678 --> 00:07:53,472
all: Okay.
One, two, three,

175
00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:56,476
revised wedding plan!

176
00:07:56,642 --> 00:07:58,268
Guys, I'm so honored
that you asked me

177
00:07:58,269 --> 00:08:00,396
to officiate your wedding.
[exhales]

178
00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:02,397
I just wanna make sure
you want your ceremony

179
00:08:02,398 --> 00:08:04,734
to be so non-traditional.

180
00:08:04,984 --> 00:08:07,570
Liz, all--all we care about
is that it's fun,

181
00:08:07,820 --> 00:08:09,822
and that it's personal to us.

182
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:12,073
But, uh, are--are you sure
you don't wanna do

183
00:08:12,074 --> 00:08:13,658
at least something
a little religious?

184
00:08:13,659 --> 00:08:14,993
What? Why?

185
00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:17,412
Well, Mom sent us
to Hebrew school for nine years,

186
00:08:17,413 --> 00:08:19,331
and Lucy, aren't your parents
pretty Christian?

187
00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:20,540
Yeah.

188
00:08:20,541 --> 00:08:22,001
There's not a single mention of God.

189
00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:23,836
Liz, relax.

190
00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:25,670
Who's gonna notice?

191
00:08:25,671 --> 00:08:28,674
[divine organ music]

192
00:08:30,134 --> 00:08:32,345
Tom, tuck your shirt in.
God's here.

193
00:08:32,595 --> 00:08:34,597
Nice to see you.
How are you?

194
00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:36,181
God! Over here!

195
00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:37,933
Patti, look at you.

196
00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:39,184
Sweetheart.
Ooh!

197
00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:40,060
Oh--oh, you're so sweet.
Aww.

198
00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:42,145
Caroline, congratulations.
Aww. [giggles]

199
00:08:42,146 --> 00:08:43,480
Jim, I'm very happy for you.
Pleasure.

200
00:08:43,481 --> 00:08:44,981
Oh, bless you.
It's great, great.

201
00:08:44,982 --> 00:08:47,318
Tom,
you're not gambling, are ya?

202
00:08:47,568 --> 00:08:50,613
It's so wonderful to have
a good old-fashioned

203
00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:52,447
religious wedding.
Yes.

204
00:08:52,448 --> 00:08:54,115
Uh, though it's not gonna be
so traditional, you know,

205
00:08:54,116 --> 00:08:55,450
with the Christian
and the Jewish,

206
00:08:55,451 --> 00:08:56,701
but I don't mind.

207
00:08:56,702 --> 00:08:58,787
Guys, I don't mind,
as long as you acknowledge me.

208
00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:00,789
Honor me in some way.
You understand.

209
00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:02,874
Oh, of course.
Obviously...

210
00:09:02,875 --> 00:09:04,834
Yes.
We're going to honor you.

211
00:09:04,835 --> 00:09:08,213
Well, your mouth to my ear.
[all laugh]

212
00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:11,299
Oh, God, let's sit down.
Sit down.

213
00:09:11,300 --> 00:09:13,260
This is gonna be wonderful.

214
00:09:13,261 --> 00:09:15,805
[horn blares]

215
00:09:16,055 --> 00:09:17,556
Ladies and gentlemen,

216
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:21,644
put your paws together
for the wedding party!

217
00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:23,395
♪ Listen, I'm trouble ♪

218
00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:25,564
♪ Yeah, yeah,
I can't keep still ♪

219
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:28,567
♪ I can't keep still,
I can't keep still ♪

220
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:30,026
♪ Ah, ah ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

221
00:09:30,027 --> 00:09:31,028
♪ Addicted to
mor-or-orphine ♪

222
00:09:31,445 --> 00:09:34,656
And now, Josh and Lucy!

223
00:09:34,657 --> 00:09:37,033
♪ I can't keep still ♪

224
00:09:37,034 --> 00:09:38,910
♪ I'm trouble,
yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

225
00:09:38,911 --> 00:09:40,495
♪ I can't keep still ♪

226
00:09:40,496 --> 00:09:42,080
♪ Ah, ah ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

227
00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:45,835
♪ Addicted to
mor-or-orphine ♪

228
00:09:46,168 --> 00:09:48,086
Wow.
We are gathered here today

229
00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:51,674
to celebrate the marriage
of Josh and Lucy,

230
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:54,175
in the witness of
friends, family,

231
00:09:54,176 --> 00:09:56,512
and the ultimate creator...

232
00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:00,850
The energy of the universe.

233
00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:03,102
What?

234
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:06,354
But first, a reading from
two dear friends of the bride,

235
00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:08,024
Meghan and Robin.

236
00:10:08,524 --> 00:10:10,276
Well,
maybe this will be a Psalm.

237
00:10:10,526 --> 00:10:13,403
You know, I was never much
a spiritual person,

238
00:10:13,404 --> 00:10:14,905
until last summer,

239
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:18,784
when I went to Burning Man
and tried iowaska.

240
00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:21,453
And I was bowing before
the great Burning Man itself,

241
00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:25,625
which, if you've never been--
it's sort of like an idol?

242
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:29,378
As I bowed before it,
I had a revelation,

243
00:10:29,712 --> 00:10:32,298
and that's when I wrote this.

244
00:10:32,548 --> 00:10:35,468
[clears throat]

245
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:39,388
[bongo slaps]
[humming]

246
00:10:39,722 --> 00:10:41,682
♪ Hey ♪

247
00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:44,809
Each spirit is a changeling.

248
00:10:44,810 --> 00:10:47,271
Each has taken many shapes.

249
00:10:47,521 --> 00:10:49,814
My spirit once was Joan of Arc's,

250
00:10:49,815 --> 00:10:52,275
and once a bunch of grapes.

251
00:10:52,276 --> 00:10:54,694
Each spirit must be thankful

252
00:10:54,695 --> 00:10:57,072
for that which leaves us odd.

253
00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:59,699
That holy force that rules the world,

254
00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:03,245
the force that we call...
[bongo flourish]

255
00:11:03,412 --> 00:11:04,372
Love.

256
00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:08,041
I'm doing the Xanax.
[pill container pops open]

257
00:11:08,042 --> 00:11:11,044
[mutters indistinctly]

258
00:11:11,045 --> 00:11:14,090
And now their friend Chris
to say a few words.

259
00:11:14,256 --> 00:11:15,840
[forceful gulp]
Thank you.

260
00:11:15,841 --> 00:11:17,300
Growing up as a Christian,

261
00:11:17,301 --> 00:11:20,680
I attended church every Sunday,

262
00:11:21,013 --> 00:11:23,890
um, in a chapel
not too different from this one,

263
00:11:23,891 --> 00:11:27,977
and it always struck me
as so appropriate

264
00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:30,480
that church services
and wedding services

265
00:11:30,481 --> 00:11:34,150
would both take place
under the same roof.

266
00:11:34,151 --> 00:11:37,404
Both are about
bringing communities together

267
00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:39,739
to celebrate love--
the love of God,

268
00:11:39,740 --> 00:11:43,660
uh, or, like today,
the love between a couple.

269
00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:46,038
I like this very much.

270
00:11:46,622 --> 00:11:50,667
The Bible contains
many beautiful, uh, verses

271
00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:52,168
about marriage, of course.

272
00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:54,713
In fact,
just this morning in bed,

273
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:57,757
I read won aloud to my boyfriend.

274
00:11:57,758 --> 00:11:59,426
[thunder rumbles and booms]

275
00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:00,802
Oh, God, I'm so sorry.

276
00:12:00,803 --> 00:12:04,097
There's no need to apologize.
I'm fine.

277
00:12:04,098 --> 00:12:05,932
Are you angry?
I'm not angry!

278
00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:07,183
[thunder booms]
I'm not angry, okay?

279
00:12:07,184 --> 00:12:09,394
It's just I have to go.
Thank you.

280
00:12:09,395 --> 00:12:11,771
You came all this way. Wouldn't you like
a glass of wine at least?

281
00:12:11,772 --> 00:12:13,773
No.
Thank you very much.

282
00:12:13,774 --> 00:12:16,609
Everything was wonderful.
Congratulations to you all.

283
00:12:16,610 --> 00:12:18,403
Thank you.
Thank you very much.

284
00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:20,405
Thank you for coming.
Thanks for coming, God.

285
00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:21,781
both: Bye.
Bye, God.

286
00:12:21,782 --> 00:12:23,533
[car beeps]

287
00:12:23,534 --> 00:12:25,577
Get--[indistinct]

288
00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:26,746
Dammit!

289
00:12:29,498 --> 00:12:32,668
[engine turning over]

290
00:12:33,794 --> 00:12:35,044
Ah, no!

291
00:12:35,045 --> 00:12:37,505
[engine sputters]
Dammit!

292
00:12:37,506 --> 00:12:38,882
Dammit, dammit, dammit!

293
00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:40,175
[line rings]
Nick!

294
00:12:40,176 --> 00:12:43,052
It's God!
Who the hell do you think it is?

295
00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:45,054
This piece of shit won't start!

296
00:12:45,055 --> 00:12:48,016
No! I don't have
Uber on my phone.

297
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:49,517
I don't know
where the hell I am!

298
00:12:49,518 --> 00:12:51,728
I don't know. All I know is
the place smells like shit!

299
00:12:51,729 --> 00:12:54,022
They don't even have
a Starbucks here!

300
00:12:54,023 --> 00:12:56,942
I'm in the middle of nowhere!
Get me out of here!

301
00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,153
What?
Oh--

302
00:13:00,154 --> 00:13:01,905
[all cheering]

303
00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:03,198
Thanks, thanks.

304
00:13:03,199 --> 00:13:04,324
Hey!
Oh, my God!

305
00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:06,659
Hey, sick-ass party, mofo!

306
00:13:06,660 --> 00:13:08,495
[laughs]
Hey.

307
00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:09,829
You did great.
I loved your song.

308
00:13:09,830 --> 00:13:12,165
That's great.
Oh, it was so good.

309
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:15,169
[somber music]

310
00:13:31,852 --> 00:13:33,436
They still look really down.
Yeah, I know.

311
00:13:33,437 --> 00:13:37,358
I really haven't seen Mom this sad
since they cancelled "Boston Legal."

312
00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:40,318
Yeah, my--my mom's
barely drunk.

313
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:42,695
Tom's on his fourth roll?

314
00:13:42,696 --> 00:13:44,072
He's not even buttering them.

315
00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:46,574
No, he's just
taking them down dry.

316
00:13:46,575 --> 00:13:48,326
We should say something.

317
00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:50,745
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.

318
00:13:50,746 --> 00:13:52,413
[glass clinking]

319
00:13:52,414 --> 00:13:54,165
Hi there, hi there.

320
00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:58,086
It's, uh, Josh and Lucy from...
the wedding.

321
00:13:58,087 --> 00:14:00,630
Hi. [giggles]
Uh, well, you guys, we did it.

322
00:14:00,631 --> 00:14:02,298
We got married.
We, uh--we did it

323
00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:03,716
just the way that we wanted to.

324
00:14:03,717 --> 00:14:05,343
Um, but there's--
there's just--

325
00:14:05,344 --> 00:14:08,054
there's one more thing
that we, uh--

326
00:14:08,055 --> 00:14:10,849
we need to do.
Yeah, and it might, uh--

327
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:13,184
it might make our parents,
over here,

328
00:14:13,185 --> 00:14:15,061
a little bit uncomfortable.

329
00:14:15,062 --> 00:14:19,274
All eyes on this table here.
Just, uh, turn your attention.

330
00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:21,568
[clears throat]
We just wanna say thank you.

331
00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:23,736
Yeah, these are--these are
the people that raised us.

332
00:14:23,737 --> 00:14:25,780
Yeah. How 'bout a round of
applause, huh?

333
00:14:25,781 --> 00:14:27,657
That's right, yeah, get up!
Come on, get up.

334
00:14:27,658 --> 00:14:28,908
Stand up.
Take a bow, please.

335
00:14:28,909 --> 00:14:30,618
Mom, come one, Mom.
[giggles]

336
00:14:30,619 --> 00:14:32,203
Come on, Tom.

337
00:14:32,204 --> 00:14:35,207
[cheerful music]

338
00:14:42,089 --> 00:14:43,381
Thank you.

339
00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:45,758
I love you, Mom.
I love you, Tom.

340
00:14:45,759 --> 00:14:47,928
We love you.

341
00:15:07,781 --> 00:15:08,698
[laughs]
Whoo!

342
00:15:08,699 --> 00:15:10,408
Oh, God, what a day.

343
00:15:10,409 --> 00:15:12,619
[groans]
Hi.

344
00:15:12,620 --> 00:15:15,455
Oh! Aww.
The married couple.

345
00:15:15,456 --> 00:15:17,415
Ay.
[all laugh]

346
00:15:17,416 --> 00:15:19,292
I can't believe we actually
pulled this thing off.

347
00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:21,127
Yeah, no kidding, compared to
all this wedding stuff,

348
00:15:21,128 --> 00:15:22,295
being married's
gonna be a breeze.

349
00:15:22,296 --> 00:15:26,466
Yeah, no kidding.
[all laugh]

350
00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:29,886
What?
[laughter darkens]

351
00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:30,803
No?

352
00:15:30,804 --> 00:15:33,681
[monstrous growl]

353
00:15:33,682 --> 00:15:35,183
[crash and clatter]
Ah!

354
00:15:35,184 --> 00:15:36,643
God! What the hell is that?

355
00:15:36,644 --> 00:15:38,394
Looks like your first
challenge as a married couple.

356
00:15:38,395 --> 00:15:41,689
[roars] Josh and Lucy,
I have come for you.

357
00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:44,067
Face me, face me.
Okay, uh, how do--

358
00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:45,443
how do we--how do we
deal with this thing?

359
00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:49,113
Well, you definitely wanna
stab it in the eye.

360
00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:50,323
There ya go, Mrs. Greenberg.

361
00:15:50,324 --> 00:15:52,283
Oh, and it hates fire...
That's right.

362
00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:54,410
So you might want
this flamethrower.

363
00:15:54,411 --> 00:15:57,622
Oh, you brought it.
That's so smart.

364
00:15:57,623 --> 00:16:00,917
A shield is always handy.

365
00:16:00,918 --> 00:16:02,877
Oh, okay, that's heavy.
[groans]

366
00:16:02,878 --> 00:16:05,672
But honestly, the most important thing
is to just communicate.

367
00:16:05,673 --> 00:16:06,839
Oh, yeah.
Definitely.

368
00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:08,591
Just talk to each other.
Yeah.

369
00:16:08,592 --> 00:16:09,926
[roars]

370
00:16:09,927 --> 00:16:11,511
All right, guys, let's do this.

371
00:16:11,512 --> 00:16:13,805
Here we go.
[roars]

372
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:16,182
Whoa.
Wait, are you not coming?

373
00:16:16,183 --> 00:16:18,017
Oh, honey,
when it comes to marriage,

374
00:16:18,018 --> 00:16:19,686
you're really
kind of on your own.

375
00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:21,938
Don't worry, we gave you
everything you need.

376
00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:23,648
You're ready.

377
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:24,774
You are not ready.

378
00:16:24,775 --> 00:16:27,360
I will kill you
in a horrible way!

379
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:29,195
[sighs]
Oh, don't listen to Gragdor.

380
00:16:29,196 --> 00:16:31,781
His bark is worse than his many bites.

381
00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:33,449
Make a fried calamari out of him.

382
00:16:33,450 --> 00:16:35,326
[growling]
Okay.

383
00:16:35,327 --> 00:16:36,537
On three?

384
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:39,998
Yeah, on three.

385
00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:42,041
One.
Two.

386
00:16:42,042 --> 00:16:42,875
[roars]

387
00:16:42,876 --> 00:16:45,462
Three.
[both scream]

388
00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:51,342
Okay.
Okay, hey, did we remember Ed and Trish?

389
00:16:51,343 --> 00:16:52,301
Yes, I did.

390
00:16:52,302 --> 00:16:54,262
Uh, did you remember
your mother's dentist?

391
00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:56,556
Yes, I did. I drew a little picture
of a tooth saying, "Thanks."

392
00:16:56,557 --> 00:16:58,391
Aww, that's
a really good idea.

393
00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:00,978
Um, I think that's all of
our thank yous done.

394
00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:04,898
That is that.

395
00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:08,485
What do we do now?
Uh...

396
00:17:08,736 --> 00:17:10,487
Wanna take a walk?

397
00:17:10,738 --> 00:17:12,573
I would love to.

398
00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:15,576
[thunder rumbling]

399
00:17:17,745 --> 00:17:19,245
[sighs]

400
00:17:19,246 --> 00:17:22,791
[enchanting music]

401
00:17:22,958 --> 00:17:25,293
Oh, hey.
Hmm?

402
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:27,379
♪ One, two, three ♪

403
00:17:28,964 --> 00:17:30,299
[bird squawks]

404
00:17:31,300 --> 00:17:32,801
[bird squawks]

405
00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:52,236
♪ We follow the river ♪

406
00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:54,906
♪ Down to the sea ♪

407
00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:57,825
♪ Showing the city ♪

408
00:17:57,826 --> 00:17:59,869
♪ How to be free ♪

409
00:17:59,870 --> 00:18:02,538
♪ From the world
to the window ♪

410
00:18:02,539 --> 00:18:05,208
♪ And the world between ♪

411
00:18:05,209 --> 00:18:07,919
♪ What we are,
what we've done to ♪

412
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:11,715
♪ What it really means ♪