1
00:00:02,980 --> 00:00:05,714
I don't know. Pete's always
kind of given me the creeps.
2
00:00:05,716 --> 00:00:07,416
Hey, look, he has
this bizarre obsession
3
00:00:07,418 --> 00:00:09,184
With what's going on
in the kappa house,
4
00:00:09,186 --> 00:00:10,585
Which is weird enough.
5
00:00:10,587 --> 00:00:12,220
And then the guy's got
a red devil costume.
6
00:00:12,222 --> 00:00:13,321
In his closet?
7
00:00:13,323 --> 00:00:14,423
Come on, girl.
8
00:00:14,425 --> 00:00:17,225
Which is strange,
i'll admit.
9
00:00:17,227 --> 00:00:19,227
I just... I don't know.
10
00:00:19,229 --> 00:00:20,929
I really think
i was wrong.
11
00:00:20,931 --> 00:00:22,831
I don't believe
he could be the killer.
12
00:00:22,833 --> 00:00:24,433
I don't care what
you believe, okay?
13
00:00:24,435 --> 00:00:26,068
You have to promise me
that from now on,
14
00:00:26,070 --> 00:00:27,436
You're not gonna go
anywhere alone,
15
00:00:27,438 --> 00:00:29,404
And we're both gonna use
the tasers my grandmama sent.
16
00:00:29,406 --> 00:00:32,274
Ooh, pork rinds.
Ooh, here.
17
00:00:32,276 --> 00:00:33,542
I'm freaking starving.
18
00:00:33,544 --> 00:00:35,277
There is food nowhere
in kappa house.
19
00:00:35,279 --> 00:00:36,711
Ugh!
I guess it makes sense.
20
00:00:36,713 --> 00:00:38,580
The cook did get
her face fried off.
21
00:00:38,582 --> 00:00:40,248
The chanels have started
eating cotton balls.
22
00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:42,384
Number three says it keeps you
from being hungry.
23
00:00:42,386 --> 00:00:44,853
Hey! We're stocking up now!
Can you get
24
00:00:44,855 --> 00:00:46,521
Some syrup to dip
the ranch chips in?
25
00:00:46,523 --> 00:00:48,023
You want to put syrup on chips?
26
00:00:48,025 --> 00:00:49,758
You can't be serious, right?
27
00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:51,259
Yes, i'm serious!
28
00:00:51,261 --> 00:00:53,328
You're insane.
29
00:00:56,100 --> 00:00:58,100
Uh, all right, let me see.
30
00:00:58,102 --> 00:01:00,035
All right, we have
strawberry and chocolate.
31
00:01:00,037 --> 00:01:01,203
What do you want?
32
00:01:01,205 --> 00:01:03,705
Are you out your mind?
Chocolate.
33
00:01:06,210 --> 00:01:08,543
(echoing screaming)
34
00:01:11,949 --> 00:01:15,350
(high-pitched whirring)
35
00:01:22,426 --> 00:01:23,658
(thudding)
36
00:01:23,660 --> 00:01:25,560
Aah! Oh!
Oh, my god!
37
00:01:25,562 --> 00:01:26,962
What the hell's going on?
38
00:01:26,964 --> 00:01:28,563
We just caught a serial killer.
39
00:01:28,565 --> 00:01:30,599
Call the police, please.
Oh!
40
00:01:30,601 --> 00:01:33,068
Let's see who you are,
you sick son of a bitch.
(groaning)
41
00:01:33,070 --> 00:01:34,836
It hurts.
Eugene?!
42
00:01:34,838 --> 00:01:37,472
You know him?
He's in my
poli-sci class.
43
00:01:37,474 --> 00:01:39,107
Oh, my god.
Eugene:
I'm sorry, okay?
44
00:01:39,109 --> 00:01:41,409
I'll pay for 'em.
I left home without my wallet.
45
00:01:41,411 --> 00:01:42,677
Ow, my nuts.
46
00:01:42,679 --> 00:01:44,579
Ow! It hurts so bad!
47
00:01:49,419 --> 00:01:52,487
I don't understand.
Where is number two's body?
48
00:01:52,489 --> 00:01:53,955
Is she alive?
Is she dead?
49
00:01:53,957 --> 00:01:55,790
Who is stealing
all these bodies?!
50
00:01:55,792 --> 00:01:57,359
Don't ask me!
I'm not the killer.
51
00:01:57,361 --> 00:01:59,194
I was just bored,
so i came out here
52
00:01:59,196 --> 00:02:00,996
To look at number two's
frozen dead body,
53
00:02:00,998 --> 00:02:03,165
And lo and behold,
she's not here.
54
00:02:03,167 --> 00:02:05,000
Look, chanel,
i'm gonna be honest with you.
55
00:02:05,002 --> 00:02:06,535
Sort of over
56
00:02:06,537 --> 00:02:09,171
This whole serial murder thing
that's going on right now.
57
00:02:09,173 --> 00:02:10,672
Last night i had
58
00:02:10,674 --> 00:02:13,475
An amazing threesome with roger
and dodger, and i realized
59
00:02:13,477 --> 00:02:15,544
That i'd rather focus my
attention this semester
60
00:02:15,546 --> 00:02:17,779
On getting spit-roasted
by hot golf frat twins
61
00:02:17,781 --> 00:02:18,947
Than help you figure out
62
00:02:18,949 --> 00:02:20,482
Who's murdering
a bunch of dumb gashes.
63
00:02:20,484 --> 00:02:21,483
What are you saying?!
64
00:02:21,485 --> 00:02:23,118
You heard me.
65
00:02:23,120 --> 00:02:24,452
I got eiffel towered
66
00:02:24,454 --> 00:02:26,621
By hot morons
who are brothers.
67
00:02:26,623 --> 00:02:28,823
And now i'm out.
68
00:02:28,825 --> 00:02:31,326
See, it occurred to me
that i don't really care
69
00:02:31,328 --> 00:02:32,961
Where chanel #2 is.
70
00:02:32,963 --> 00:02:35,830
You're the president, which
means it's your problem.
71
00:02:35,832 --> 00:02:38,033
I'd just hop to it
if i were you,
72
00:02:38,035 --> 00:02:39,334
Because pretty soon,
73
00:02:39,336 --> 00:02:41,369
Folks are gonna start noticing
she's missing,
74
00:02:41,371 --> 00:02:43,205
And they're gonna
start snooping.
75
00:02:43,207 --> 00:02:45,974
Don't you walk away from me,
number five!
76
00:02:45,976 --> 00:02:47,475
(laughs)
77
00:02:47,477 --> 00:02:50,212
I will destroy you, bitch!
78
00:02:51,715 --> 00:02:54,216
(indistinct whispering)
79
00:02:54,218 --> 00:02:56,318
(whispering):
Quiet, quiet, quiet.
80
00:03:00,023 --> 00:03:02,257
Chanel #2?
81
00:03:06,830 --> 00:03:08,830
(door squeaking)
82
00:03:08,832 --> 00:03:10,832
Wow. Look.
83
00:03:10,834 --> 00:03:12,667
There's a huge stain
on the floor.
84
00:03:12,669 --> 00:03:15,403
Although with the chanels,
it really could be anything.
85
00:03:15,405 --> 00:03:18,106
Bulimia, scissor.
Maybe it's blood.
86
00:03:18,108 --> 00:03:19,274
Denise:
Of course
87
00:03:19,276 --> 00:03:21,276
It's blood.
88
00:03:21,278 --> 00:03:23,245
In my experience,
89
00:03:23,247 --> 00:03:24,713
Any time somebody asks,
90
00:03:24,715 --> 00:03:26,581
"oh, i wonder
if that's blood,"
91
00:03:26,583 --> 00:03:29,050
It's almost always blood.
92
00:03:29,052 --> 00:03:31,920
I mean, you know how many times
it's, like, ketchup?
93
00:03:31,922 --> 00:03:33,188
Zero percent of the time.
94
00:03:33,190 --> 00:03:34,656
Hit the light.
Yeah.
95
00:03:36,727 --> 00:03:39,127
Oh-ho.
96
00:03:39,129 --> 00:03:41,896
Oh! There it is.
That's blood.
97
00:03:41,898 --> 00:03:44,099
Grace:
But what is that?
It's luminol.
98
00:03:44,101 --> 00:03:46,268
It reacts to the iron
in hemoglobin.
99
00:03:46,270 --> 00:03:48,236
Wait. Hold on.
100
00:03:48,238 --> 00:03:51,106
You're telling me,
you don't carry a gun,
101
00:03:51,108 --> 00:03:53,575
But you carry around
a bottle of that stuff?
Yeah!
102
00:03:53,577 --> 00:03:56,911
'cause it also reacts
to an enzyme in horseradish,
103
00:03:56,913 --> 00:04:00,882
And i hate horseradish,
but i love me some arby's.
104
00:04:00,884 --> 00:04:02,550
So what i do is,
105
00:04:02,552 --> 00:04:04,753
I take my sandwich home,
cut the light off,
106
00:04:04,755 --> 00:04:07,122
Put a little luminol on there,
do a little check
107
00:04:07,124 --> 00:04:08,790
Just to be sure
they didn't accidentally
108
00:04:08,792 --> 00:04:10,558
Sneak a little
horsey sauce on it.
109
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:13,662
Nobody's looking
for this girl.
110
00:04:13,664 --> 00:04:14,896
Now, that's suspicious,
111
00:04:14,898 --> 00:04:16,965
Especially when
the bitch done tweeted...
112
00:04:16,967 --> 00:04:18,099
(phone chimes)
look at this.
113
00:04:18,101 --> 00:04:19,768
"i'm being murdered
114
00:04:19,770 --> 00:04:21,670
By the red devil."
115
00:04:21,672 --> 00:04:24,339
The chanels said she had
some sort of nervous breakdown
116
00:04:24,341 --> 00:04:25,640
And went home to california.
117
00:04:25,642 --> 00:04:27,142
Are y'all crazy?
118
00:04:27,144 --> 00:04:29,477
There is a psycho
killing people.
119
00:04:29,479 --> 00:04:31,079
He killed my dear friend
120
00:04:31,081 --> 00:04:34,015
And secure enforcement solutions
colleague shondell.
121
00:04:34,017 --> 00:04:36,284
Stabbed that girl
right in the face.
122
00:04:36,286 --> 00:04:37,852
And, no, she wasn't that cute
to begin with,
123
00:04:37,854 --> 00:04:39,654
But that is not the point.
124
00:04:39,656 --> 00:04:43,191
The point is, there's a missing
girl, blood on the floor,
125
00:04:43,193 --> 00:04:46,261
And she's tweeting, "oh, hey,
just want y'all to know
126
00:04:46,263 --> 00:04:47,829
I'm getting murdered,"
and y'all are standing here
127
00:04:47,831 --> 00:04:50,365
Like, "ooh,
i wonder what happened."
128
00:04:50,367 --> 00:04:52,334
The girl is dead.
129
00:04:52,336 --> 00:04:54,369
Look, i agree that it does
sort of seem that way,
130
00:04:54,371 --> 00:04:55,937
But here's what's
confusing to me.
131
00:04:55,939 --> 00:04:58,273
Look. Number two is still
posting on instagram.
132
00:04:58,275 --> 00:05:00,175
There she is by
the pool sunbathing.
133
00:05:00,177 --> 00:05:02,277
The bitch is not even cute.
134
00:05:02,279 --> 00:05:04,779
Look, maybe she's just
back home in bel air.
We should find out.
135
00:05:04,781 --> 00:05:06,614
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
136
00:05:06,616 --> 00:05:08,216
Y'all just gonna
137
00:05:08,218 --> 00:05:09,784
Go to bel air?
I mean, just like that?
138
00:05:09,786 --> 00:05:11,486
Okay.
139
00:05:11,488 --> 00:05:13,988
Don't ask me if i want to go.
140
00:05:13,990 --> 00:05:16,624
Hoes.
141
00:05:16,626 --> 00:05:19,861
♪ now tell me
whatcha gonna do... ♪
142
00:05:19,863 --> 00:05:21,629
Grace:
What's with all
143
00:05:21,631 --> 00:05:22,731
These kappa signs?
144
00:05:22,733 --> 00:05:24,032
It's a thing now.
145
00:05:24,034 --> 00:05:26,067
People are saying that
the killer's targeting kappas
146
00:05:26,069 --> 00:05:27,836
Or people associated
with kappa.
147
00:05:27,838 --> 00:05:29,838
So, they figure
if he knows they're not,
148
00:05:29,840 --> 00:05:31,906
He won't gut 'em
like a fish.
Ugh!
149
00:05:31,908 --> 00:05:33,675
Chad:
It's just blowing my mind, man.
150
00:05:33,677 --> 00:05:36,044
I can't believe my best
friend boone is dead.
151
00:05:36,046 --> 00:05:38,813
Yeah, i heard the coroner
calling boone's death a suicide.
152
00:05:38,815 --> 00:05:40,315
It's a bloody tragedy.
153
00:05:40,317 --> 00:05:41,983
Yeah, well, it
was really bloody.
154
00:05:41,985 --> 00:05:43,485
I don't know, man.
155
00:05:43,487 --> 00:05:45,353
It's just one of
those things in life
156
00:05:45,355 --> 00:05:48,089
That just hits you so hard,
and you just think to yourself,
157
00:05:48,091 --> 00:05:50,825
Wow, it's gonna be weeks before
i really, truly get over this.
158
00:05:50,827 --> 00:05:52,026
Chanel:
Chad?!
159
00:05:52,028 --> 00:05:54,562
Chad, i need to talk to you!
160
00:05:54,564 --> 00:05:57,766
It is so sad about boone,
161
00:05:57,768 --> 00:05:59,000
Isn't it?
162
00:05:59,002 --> 00:06:00,235
Oh, are you okay?
163
00:06:00,237 --> 00:06:02,237
I mean, how are you feeling?
164
00:06:02,239 --> 00:06:03,505
Uh, i don't know.
How do you...
165
00:06:03,507 --> 00:06:04,873
How do you think
i'm feeling, chanel?
166
00:06:04,875 --> 00:06:06,074
My best friend in the world,
167
00:06:06,076 --> 00:06:07,442
Who used to compliment
me all the time,
168
00:06:07,444 --> 00:06:09,411
Was murdered,
so, news flash.
169
00:06:09,413 --> 00:06:10,879
I'm super sad.
170
00:06:10,881 --> 00:06:12,414
I want to be the one
who tells you
171
00:06:12,416 --> 00:06:13,882
How awesome you are
all the time.
172
00:06:13,884 --> 00:06:16,384
Well, uh, you had your chance,
chanel, and you ruined it
173
00:06:16,386 --> 00:06:18,119
When you started
freaking out when i said
174
00:06:18,121 --> 00:06:19,954
I want to have sex
with your corpse.
175
00:06:19,956 --> 00:06:22,757
I know, okay,
and i am so sorry.
176
00:06:22,759 --> 00:06:24,959
I just... I want us
to be together.
177
00:06:24,961 --> 00:06:26,728
I mean, all i ask
178
00:06:26,730 --> 00:06:30,999
Is that... Maybe you have sex
with a smaller number of people.
179
00:06:32,269 --> 00:06:33,935
(whimpering)
180
00:06:33,937 --> 00:06:35,236
What?
181
00:06:35,238 --> 00:06:39,407
Do you understand how
controlling that is, chanel?
182
00:06:39,409 --> 00:06:41,309
Okay, i know you're
not a psych major,
183
00:06:41,311 --> 00:06:42,744
So you're not
gonna really process
184
00:06:42,746 --> 00:06:44,078
What i'm telling
you right now,
185
00:06:44,080 --> 00:06:45,914
But what you just said is
literally pathological.
186
00:06:45,916 --> 00:06:49,417
Okay, why do you even care
how many people i sleep with?
187
00:06:49,419 --> 00:06:51,286
Okay? I always
wear protection,
188
00:06:51,288 --> 00:06:52,887
And it's not like
i love these chicks.
189
00:06:52,889 --> 00:06:55,590
You... You love me?
190
00:06:55,592 --> 00:06:57,659
That is not what i said!
191
00:06:57,661 --> 00:06:59,227
You love me.
192
00:06:59,229 --> 00:07:00,628
Stop saying that.
193
00:07:00,630 --> 00:07:04,499
Look, chanel,
you're hot... I guess.
194
00:07:04,501 --> 00:07:06,334
I mean,
your boobs are symmetrical,
195
00:07:06,336 --> 00:07:08,470
And you shave your box
in a hot way.
196
00:07:08,472 --> 00:07:09,771
All right, but also
you're responsible
197
00:07:09,773 --> 00:07:11,339
For the worst pledge class
198
00:07:11,341 --> 00:07:13,441
In the history of the
university. At this point,
199
00:07:13,443 --> 00:07:15,343
I'm not even sure
if i could have sex with you.
200
00:07:15,345 --> 00:07:17,145
Okay, i'd be doing you
201
00:07:17,147 --> 00:07:18,513
And all of a sudden look down
202
00:07:18,515 --> 00:07:20,248
And i'd see the back
of your head,
203
00:07:20,250 --> 00:07:21,916
And then i'd just, like,
picture the back of the head
204
00:07:21,918 --> 00:07:24,285
Of one of your ugly pledges,
and i'd...
205
00:07:24,287 --> 00:07:26,254
I'm sorry, chanel.
It's just not gonna happen.
206
00:07:26,256 --> 00:07:28,323
I got to break up
with you again.
207
00:07:28,325 --> 00:07:29,791
Chad!
Yeah.
208
00:07:29,793 --> 00:07:31,493
Please. There-there has to be
something i can do.
209
00:07:31,495 --> 00:07:35,196
Ew. Look, just pray.
210
00:07:35,198 --> 00:07:38,032
Pray that all those donkey-faced
kappa pledges get murdered
211
00:07:38,034 --> 00:07:39,667
So you can be
popular again.
212
00:07:39,669 --> 00:07:41,336
Now, if you'll
excuse me,
213
00:07:41,338 --> 00:07:43,938
Earl grey and i need to go
mourn our fallen brother
214
00:07:43,940 --> 00:07:45,440
And get our drink on.
215
00:07:45,442 --> 00:07:47,108
♪ that's how we roll ♪
216
00:07:47,110 --> 00:07:48,776
♪ and i'm asking
the good lord, "why?" and sigh ♪
217
00:07:48,778 --> 00:07:50,178
♪ he told me we live to die ♪
(whines)
218
00:07:50,180 --> 00:07:51,513
♪ what's up with
murder, y'all? ♪
219
00:07:51,515 --> 00:07:52,680
♪ see, my little cousin
was hung ♪
220
00:07:52,682 --> 00:07:54,048
♪ somebody was really wrong ♪
221
00:07:54,050 --> 00:07:55,650
♪ everybody want
to test us, dawg ♪
222
00:07:55,652 --> 00:07:58,052
♪ then miss sleazy set up
eazy to fall... ♪
223
00:07:58,054 --> 00:08:00,355
Omg, are you hitting on me?
224
00:08:00,357 --> 00:08:03,224
'cause i heard munching box is
what killed michael douglas.
225
00:08:03,226 --> 00:08:05,126
No. I'm just trying
to make friends.
226
00:08:05,128 --> 00:08:06,528
And i was spying on you
227
00:08:06,530 --> 00:08:07,896
The other day
while you were changing.
228
00:08:07,898 --> 00:08:10,131
Noticed you have a tattoo
on the small of your back?
229
00:08:10,133 --> 00:08:11,966
"8/69." what
does it mean?
230
00:08:11,968 --> 00:08:14,302
Look, you seem pretty cool,
and you have this whole
231
00:08:14,304 --> 00:08:16,337
Samantha ronson thing going on
that's pretty dope,
232
00:08:16,339 --> 00:08:18,907
But don't ask a lot of questions
about me, okay?
233
00:08:18,909 --> 00:08:20,909
Okay.
234
00:08:20,911 --> 00:08:23,144
♪ see you at the crossroads. ♪
235
00:08:25,215 --> 00:08:28,216
Welcome, students,
faculty and staff,
236
00:08:28,218 --> 00:08:31,853
To this rally
for sanity and calm,
237
00:08:31,855 --> 00:08:36,257
As we vow
to take back the night!
238
00:08:36,259 --> 00:08:38,726
(applause and cheering)
239
00:08:40,363 --> 00:08:43,097
The police are still
investigating the
240
00:08:43,099 --> 00:08:46,501
Tragic passing
of freshman tiffany de salle...
241
00:08:46,503 --> 00:08:49,437
Passing? She had
her head mowed off.
242
00:08:49,439 --> 00:08:52,507
And the recent death
of junior boone clemens
243
00:08:52,509 --> 00:08:53,741
Has been ruled
244
00:08:53,743 --> 00:08:56,711
A suicide by the county coroner.
245
00:08:56,713 --> 00:08:57,946
What? That is insane.
246
00:08:57,948 --> 00:08:59,213
Who slits their
own throat?
247
00:08:59,215 --> 00:09:01,015
Keeping these facts in mind,
248
00:09:01,017 --> 00:09:03,618
We must put to bed wild rumors
249
00:09:03,620 --> 00:09:06,421
Of a serial killer,
a so-called red devil,
250
00:09:06,423 --> 00:09:08,056
Stalking this campus
251
00:09:08,058 --> 00:09:10,224
And murdering students
willy-nilly.
252
00:09:10,226 --> 00:09:13,895
Our university is
as safe as ever.
253
00:09:13,897 --> 00:09:16,631
Our security staff
of the highest caliber.
254
00:09:16,633 --> 00:09:20,602
We must, therefore,
resist the temptation
255
00:09:20,604 --> 00:09:22,770
To, for example,
256
00:09:22,772 --> 00:09:26,574
Tase freshman history major
eugene melman
257
00:09:26,576 --> 00:09:27,775
In the genitals.
258
00:09:27,777 --> 00:09:29,210
After
259
00:09:29,212 --> 00:09:30,778
Many hours
of deep soul-searching,
260
00:09:30,780 --> 00:09:33,781
I have, along with the
university's board of directors,
261
00:09:33,783 --> 00:09:36,117
Decided
that the red devil mascot
262
00:09:36,119 --> 00:09:38,553
That has demonstrated
our school's pride
263
00:09:38,555 --> 00:09:40,788
For the past 80 years
264
00:09:40,790 --> 00:09:43,625
Is really no longer appropriate
to represent us
265
00:09:43,627 --> 00:09:45,793
As we forge our way
266
00:09:45,795 --> 00:09:47,895
Into the future.
267
00:09:47,897 --> 00:09:49,931
Instead, we've decided
268
00:09:49,933 --> 00:09:53,334
To highlight
this region's proud history
269
00:09:53,336 --> 00:09:55,937
With a new mascot.
270
00:09:55,939 --> 00:09:59,641
Ladies and gentlemen,
i am thrilled
271
00:09:59,643 --> 00:10:01,909
And honored
to introduce to you
272
00:10:01,911 --> 00:10:04,946
This university's
newest addition--
273
00:10:04,948 --> 00:10:06,948
Coney!
274
00:10:06,950 --> 00:10:10,318
♪ ♪
275
00:10:12,455 --> 00:10:17,425
As you know, in 1955
local dairyman randy barfman
276
00:10:17,427 --> 00:10:20,828
Added kelp extract
to his ice cream, creating
277
00:10:20,830 --> 00:10:21,863
The world's
278
00:10:21,865 --> 00:10:24,265
First soft-serve ice cream!
279
00:10:24,267 --> 00:10:26,868
I'd like to say
a few words in closing.
280
00:10:26,870 --> 00:10:28,803
♪ i'm gonna make you feel it. ♪
281
00:10:28,805 --> 00:10:32,306
Let's tell each other
how we feel about one another.
282
00:10:32,308 --> 00:10:35,443
Find that tortured gay kid
in your life.
283
00:10:35,445 --> 00:10:37,378
Hold them close tonight.
284
00:10:37,380 --> 00:10:39,047
And, uh,
285
00:10:39,049 --> 00:10:42,917
How about a big, "go, cones!"
286
00:10:45,689 --> 00:10:47,188
Good night.
287
00:10:51,027 --> 00:10:53,094
You are a disgrace.
288
00:10:54,064 --> 00:10:56,831
I wonder how many people
live in here.
289
00:10:56,833 --> 00:10:58,666
This place is insane.
290
00:10:58,668 --> 00:11:00,668
Grace:
So, neither of you
291
00:11:00,670 --> 00:11:02,837
Have seen sonia
or heard from her?
292
00:11:02,839 --> 00:11:05,306
Not in several weeks.
293
00:11:05,308 --> 00:11:06,974
And are
you sure
294
00:11:06,976 --> 00:11:09,310
She's not hiding out
in your house somewhere
295
00:11:09,312 --> 00:11:10,812
And you haven't
found her
296
00:11:10,814 --> 00:11:12,680
Because your house
is so damn big?
297
00:11:12,682 --> 00:11:14,582
(chuckles)
that's impossible.
298
00:11:14,584 --> 00:11:17,585
Listen, what's going on?
Is-is sonia in trouble?
299
00:11:17,587 --> 00:11:18,920
We don't know.
300
00:11:18,922 --> 00:11:21,389
The bad news is, there's
a serial killer on campus.
301
00:11:21,391 --> 00:11:23,391
(gasps)
but the
good news is,
302
00:11:23,393 --> 00:11:26,094
Your daughter's still posting
photos on instagram.
303
00:11:26,096 --> 00:11:27,328
Denise:
Or somebody
304
00:11:27,330 --> 00:11:28,730
Is posting 'em for her.
305
00:11:28,732 --> 00:11:30,364
Oh, no.
Yeah.
306
00:11:30,366 --> 00:11:31,699
That's not even a cute picture.
307
00:11:31,701 --> 00:11:33,701
This is our
worst nightmare.
308
00:11:33,703 --> 00:11:35,503
She's drinking again.
309
00:11:35,505 --> 00:11:38,106
Mother:
Ladies, you have
to understand,
310
00:11:38,108 --> 00:11:40,441
Our daughter has a disease.
311
00:11:40,443 --> 00:11:42,176
She's been in and out of rehab.
312
00:11:42,178 --> 00:11:43,945
That's why we were
so happy
313
00:11:43,947 --> 00:11:45,079
When she met chad, you know?
314
00:11:45,081 --> 00:11:46,914
Frankly, we don't know
what he saw in her,
315
00:11:46,916 --> 00:11:48,282
But, you know,
he just seemed
316
00:11:48,284 --> 00:11:49,417
To level her out a little bit.
317
00:11:49,419 --> 00:11:52,053
Um, i'm sorry.
Did you say "chad"?
318
00:11:52,055 --> 00:11:54,422
Yes. Chad radwell.
319
00:11:54,424 --> 00:11:56,758
Golfer,
very handsome.
320
00:11:56,760 --> 00:11:59,627
We spent last thanksgiving
with him.
321
00:11:59,629 --> 00:12:03,731
Well, i found this letter
a few weeks ago.
322
00:12:03,733 --> 00:12:06,634
It must have fallen
behind her bureau.
323
00:12:06,636 --> 00:12:09,303
"dear chanel #2..."
324
00:12:09,305 --> 00:12:11,939
Spending thanksgiving with you
and your family was amazing.
325
00:12:11,941 --> 00:12:15,543
I love that your dad's so rich,
and i love porking you so much.
326
00:12:15,545 --> 00:12:17,612
I hope
we can keep on porking forever.
327
00:12:17,614 --> 00:12:20,281
You're so freakin' hot, and i
love the amazing faces you make
328
00:12:20,283 --> 00:12:21,949
When i'm really taking you
there.
329
00:12:21,951 --> 00:12:24,952
I'm thankful for you, chanel #2.
330
00:12:24,954 --> 00:12:28,022
Love, chad radwell.
331
00:12:29,726 --> 00:12:30,792
If our
daughter
332
00:12:30,794 --> 00:12:33,060
Is missing,
you have to find her.
333
00:12:33,062 --> 00:12:34,595
You have to find her
334
00:12:34,597 --> 00:12:36,397
And make sure that she
never comes home again.
335
00:12:36,399 --> 00:12:38,633
Damn.
336
00:12:44,641 --> 00:12:46,307
Look, i am not gonna
let some guy
337
00:12:46,309 --> 00:12:48,409
With a knife and some
anger issues scare me away.
338
00:12:48,411 --> 00:12:50,278
My vote? We stick together
and try to have
339
00:12:50,280 --> 00:12:52,146
A college experience
that is as normal as possible
340
00:12:52,148 --> 00:12:53,648
Until they inevitably
catch the killer.
341
00:12:55,351 --> 00:12:59,587
Hey. Why do you think it
says "professor tbd"?
342
00:12:59,589 --> 00:13:01,122
Wes:
Hello, ladies
and gents.
343
00:13:01,124 --> 00:13:02,824
Welcome to
intro to film analysis,
344
00:13:02,826 --> 00:13:07,195
The only class that you can
bring your own popcorn to.
345
00:13:07,197 --> 00:13:08,429
Not bad, huh?
346
00:13:08,431 --> 00:13:09,764
(clears throat)
347
00:13:09,766 --> 00:13:11,532
Oh, look, we have
an eager student.
348
00:13:11,534 --> 00:13:14,836
I like that. Yes...
Student person.
349
00:13:14,838 --> 00:13:17,038
You have a question?
Uh, y-yes,
350
00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:21,242
I have a question.
What are you doing here, dad?
351
00:13:23,179 --> 00:13:26,214
"dad." okay.
Okay, yes.
352
00:13:26,216 --> 00:13:28,115
Yes, i am
her dad.
353
00:13:28,117 --> 00:13:30,852
Busted. But don't
you guys worry.
354
00:13:30,854 --> 00:13:32,119
I will not be
playing favorites.
355
00:13:32,121 --> 00:13:33,554
You are a literature professor.
356
00:13:33,556 --> 00:13:37,325
Why are you teaching
a film studies class?
357
00:13:37,327 --> 00:13:40,695
Unless you looked
at my course schedule
358
00:13:40,697 --> 00:13:43,297
And scammed your way
into becoming my teacher.
Grace. Grace,
359
00:13:43,299 --> 00:13:45,700
Look, can't we just make
the best of this, huh?
360
00:13:45,702 --> 00:13:47,702
Honey, i am here
because you are my daughter
361
00:13:47,704 --> 00:13:50,371
And i want to make sure
that you are safe.
362
00:13:53,309 --> 00:13:54,809
(sighs)
363
00:13:54,811 --> 00:13:56,711
Jennifer:
Excuse me,
364
00:13:56,713 --> 00:13:58,246
Do you mind
if i light this in here?
365
00:13:58,248 --> 00:14:00,047
Okay.
366
00:14:00,049 --> 00:14:02,550
First day of class.
367
00:14:02,552 --> 00:14:04,886
Let's launch our exploration
into the magic
368
00:14:04,888 --> 00:14:07,054
Of cinematic storytelling
369
00:14:07,056 --> 00:14:08,556
With what i consider to be
one of the...
370
00:14:08,558 --> 00:14:10,157
(exhales)
371
00:14:10,159 --> 00:14:12,827
Scratch that.
With what i consider to be
372
00:14:12,829 --> 00:14:16,397
The greatest film of all time.
373
00:14:16,399 --> 00:14:18,466
Blue is the
warmest color?
Sixteen candles?
374
00:14:19,402 --> 00:14:22,270
All, uh, great choices.
375
00:14:22,272 --> 00:14:25,072
No, in my mind, the greatest
cinematic achievement
376
00:14:25,074 --> 00:14:27,241
Is the 1974
377
00:14:27,243 --> 00:14:29,410
Tobe hooper
classic
378
00:14:29,412 --> 00:14:33,114
The texas chain saw massacre.
379
00:14:36,753 --> 00:14:38,753
Narrator: The film
which you are about to see
380
00:14:38,755 --> 00:14:41,088
Is an account of the tragedy
which befell
381
00:14:41,090 --> 00:14:42,790
A group of five youths...
382
00:14:42,792 --> 00:14:44,859
(woman screaming)
383
00:14:54,037 --> 00:14:56,504
(chain saw buzzing)
384
00:15:06,215 --> 00:15:08,282
(exhales)
385
00:15:15,224 --> 00:15:17,458
(exhales)
386
00:15:17,460 --> 00:15:19,760
Wow.
387
00:15:19,762 --> 00:15:22,830
A lot going on
in those last few frames.
388
00:15:22,832 --> 00:15:23,998
Vietnam,
389
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,000
Watergate,
the invention of the pill,
390
00:15:26,002 --> 00:15:27,368
The white album.
391
00:15:28,938 --> 00:15:32,740
Has there ever been a more
perfect weapon of destruction?
392
00:15:32,742 --> 00:15:35,476
Yes, sally survives in the end,
393
00:15:35,478 --> 00:15:38,212
But does she?
394
00:15:40,483 --> 00:15:44,385
Aren't we all running
from the chain saws in our past?
395
00:15:46,422 --> 00:15:49,190
See you next tuesday.
396
00:15:51,094 --> 00:15:54,328
(indistinct chatter)
397
00:15:54,330 --> 00:15:55,997
Wow.
398
00:15:55,999 --> 00:15:58,833
You are
amazing.
399
00:15:58,835 --> 00:16:01,502
What did any of that mean?
400
00:16:01,504 --> 00:16:04,438
Uh, well, it means that, uh,
401
00:16:04,440 --> 00:16:06,707
We've all been traumatized.
402
00:16:06,709 --> 00:16:08,275
Oh.
403
00:16:08,277 --> 00:16:09,777
And what we do with the
hurt from that trauma
404
00:16:09,779 --> 00:16:11,045
Defines who we are.
405
00:16:11,047 --> 00:16:15,016
Do we look... Inward
and-and heal
406
00:16:15,018 --> 00:16:16,951
Or...
407
00:16:16,953 --> 00:16:19,153
Do we take that hurt
408
00:16:19,155 --> 00:16:22,790
And turn it into anger
and take it out on the world?
409
00:16:22,792 --> 00:16:25,459
Which path have you chosen?
410
00:16:25,461 --> 00:16:28,396
Oh, me? I'm just a father trying
to look after his daughter.
411
00:16:28,398 --> 00:16:31,399
Yeah. Oh,
412
00:16:31,401 --> 00:16:33,034
Hey, uh,
i actually came by
413
00:16:33,036 --> 00:16:35,536
To tell you about this teachers'
neighborhood watch i'm starting.
414
00:16:35,538 --> 00:16:36,971
I thought
415
00:16:36,973 --> 00:16:38,305
We could maybe have some patrols
yeah.
416
00:16:38,307 --> 00:16:39,707
Walking the campus at night?
No. Yes,
that...
417
00:16:39,709 --> 00:16:40,908
I don't know if that's...
418
00:16:40,910 --> 00:16:42,710
That's great.
No, that's a great idea.
419
00:16:42,712 --> 00:16:43,878
I'm in.
Great.
420
00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:44,912
Maybe we could
discuss it
421
00:16:44,914 --> 00:16:46,914
Over a salad or something.
422
00:16:46,916 --> 00:16:49,417
Well, it's a step up
from coffee without the...
423
00:16:49,419 --> 00:16:51,919
Full commitment of a whole meal.
424
00:16:51,921 --> 00:16:53,721
I would love that.
425
00:16:53,723 --> 00:16:55,923
Cool.
Munsch:
Hey.
426
00:16:55,925 --> 00:16:58,426
Teach. Hi.
I just stopped by to...
427
00:16:58,428 --> 00:17:00,728
See how your first day
of classes went.
428
00:17:00,730 --> 00:17:04,331
Oh, he was wonderful.
They loved him.
429
00:17:04,333 --> 00:17:06,100
Hmm. We'd better watch out.
430
00:17:06,102 --> 00:17:08,402
Might have to put you
on full-time.
431
00:17:08,404 --> 00:17:11,105
Oh, gigi,
432
00:17:11,107 --> 00:17:12,339
Would you mind
stopping
433
00:17:12,341 --> 00:17:14,041
By my tennis court
someday this week?
434
00:17:14,043 --> 00:17:15,509
I'm there every day.
I just...
435
00:17:15,511 --> 00:17:18,345
I have something
i want to talk to you about.
436
00:17:21,751 --> 00:17:23,584
Hmm.
437
00:17:23,586 --> 00:17:25,653
(heavy breathing)
438
00:17:31,928 --> 00:17:34,195
Man:
Something happens
when you put on a costume.
439
00:17:34,197 --> 00:17:36,097
It changes you.
440
00:17:36,099 --> 00:17:39,433
One week ago, aaron cohen
was an absolute nobody.
441
00:17:39,435 --> 00:17:41,268
No friends, no girlfriend.
442
00:17:41,270 --> 00:17:43,571
So when dean munsch
approached me because
443
00:17:43,573 --> 00:17:45,239
I'm five-foot-one
and the only guy on campus
444
00:17:45,241 --> 00:17:46,574
Who could fit into the uniform
445
00:17:46,576 --> 00:17:48,109
She ripped off
from an ice cream stand...
446
00:17:48,111 --> 00:17:49,443
Hey, coney.
Hey, coney.
447
00:17:49,445 --> 00:17:51,112
...I was like, "what the hell?"
448
00:17:51,114 --> 00:17:52,646
(laughing)
449
00:17:52,648 --> 00:17:55,549
Now i'm the top dog on campus.
450
00:17:55,551 --> 00:17:57,318
Aaron cohen can't get a date,
451
00:17:57,320 --> 00:18:00,221
But coney gets more trim
than a barbershop.
452
00:18:00,223 --> 00:18:03,057
See, when you're coney,
you get certain privileges.
453
00:18:03,059 --> 00:18:05,726
When you put on a costume,
454
00:18:05,728 --> 00:18:08,062
You can get away with anything.
455
00:18:08,064 --> 00:18:11,966
♪ baby, i'm your man... ♪
456
00:18:11,968 --> 00:18:14,001
Forget dental school.
457
00:18:14,003 --> 00:18:16,337
Aaron cohen is
never taking off this costume.
458
00:18:16,339 --> 00:18:18,672
I'm riding the coney train
straight to a career
459
00:18:18,674 --> 00:18:21,842
As a professional mascot.
460
00:18:21,844 --> 00:18:23,077
♪ you bet... ♪
461
00:18:23,079 --> 00:18:24,111
(buzzing)
462
00:18:24,113 --> 00:18:25,746
(aaron screams)
463
00:18:25,748 --> 00:18:29,617
♪ baby, i'm your man ♪
464
00:18:29,619 --> 00:18:32,987
♪ don't you know that, baby ♪
465
00:18:32,989 --> 00:18:34,021
Aaron:
No!
466
00:18:34,023 --> 00:18:35,322
♪ i'm your man... ♪
467
00:18:35,324 --> 00:18:38,526
(aaron shouting)
468
00:18:38,528 --> 00:18:39,527
♪ you bet... ♪
469
00:18:39,529 --> 00:18:41,328
Oh, no! No!
470
00:18:41,330 --> 00:18:42,429
Don't!
471
00:18:42,431 --> 00:18:44,865
(shouting hysterically)
472
00:18:44,867 --> 00:18:46,167
♪ do it with me ♪
473
00:18:46,169 --> 00:18:47,535
♪ if you're gonna do it... ♪
474
00:18:47,537 --> 00:18:50,271
(screaming)
475
00:18:50,273 --> 00:18:53,774
♪ if you're gonna do it,
do it right. ♪
476
00:18:55,111 --> 00:18:57,111
♪ ♪
477
00:18:59,549 --> 00:19:02,816
♪ when i was just ♪
478
00:19:02,818 --> 00:19:05,553
♪ a little girl ♪
479
00:19:05,555 --> 00:19:08,556
♪ i asked my mother ♪
480
00:19:08,558 --> 00:19:12,560
♪ what will i be? ♪
481
00:19:12,562 --> 00:19:13,961
(gasps)
482
00:19:13,963 --> 00:19:16,163
♪ will i be pretty? ♪
483
00:19:16,165 --> 00:19:18,832
♪ will i be rich? ♪
484
00:19:18,834 --> 00:19:22,236
♪ here's what she said
to me... ♪
485
00:19:22,238 --> 00:19:25,239
This closet is the most precious
thing in my life.
486
00:19:25,241 --> 00:19:27,241
It's like a second vagina
to me.
487
00:19:27,243 --> 00:19:31,011
So you sneaking in here
and rifling through my clothes
488
00:19:31,013 --> 00:19:33,314
Is a heinous violation.
489
00:19:33,316 --> 00:19:35,983
You have violated my closet-vag.
490
00:19:35,985 --> 00:19:37,651
Is it true that karl lagerfeld
is your uncle
491
00:19:37,653 --> 00:19:39,386
And he restocks this closet
every year?
492
00:19:39,388 --> 00:19:42,356
Well, he's not really my uncle.
493
00:19:42,358 --> 00:19:43,757
I just call him uncle karl
494
00:19:43,759 --> 00:19:45,259
Because he's so close
to my parents.
495
00:19:45,261 --> 00:19:47,595
My mother was one of
the first americans
496
00:19:47,597 --> 00:19:49,496
Ever to wear his
surprise skirt.
497
00:19:49,498 --> 00:19:51,365
She was seven.
498
00:19:51,367 --> 00:19:53,434
I even have one
of choupette's in vitro kittens.
499
00:19:53,436 --> 00:19:55,069
Who's choupette?
500
00:19:55,071 --> 00:19:57,438
His sacré de birmanie cat,
of course.
501
00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,573
She has 46,000
followers on twitter
502
00:19:59,575 --> 00:20:01,408
And two nannies.
503
00:20:01,410 --> 00:20:03,043
Luckiest pussy in the world.
504
00:20:03,045 --> 00:20:05,613
Please, mommy,
please tell me everything.
505
00:20:05,615 --> 00:20:07,915
Uncle karl comes here every fall
506
00:20:07,917 --> 00:20:10,184
With trunks full of clothes
for me to try on.
507
00:20:10,186 --> 00:20:11,852
I keep what he likes.
508
00:20:11,854 --> 00:20:13,687
And what do you do
with the clothes from last year?
509
00:20:13,689 --> 00:20:15,623
Burn them. I once thought
510
00:20:15,625 --> 00:20:16,957
About donating them to charity,
511
00:20:16,959 --> 00:20:19,059
But there is something
so depressing
512
00:20:19,061 --> 00:20:21,395
About a poor person
walking around in couture.
513
00:20:21,397 --> 00:20:23,430
It's like, "sorry,
but that lanvin sweater
514
00:20:23,432 --> 00:20:26,200
Is not appropriate for your job
at roy rogers, welfare queen."
515
00:20:26,202 --> 00:20:29,270
Growing up, all i wanted to be
was a fashion girl.
516
00:20:29,272 --> 00:20:31,205
And then tragedy
struck.
517
00:20:31,207 --> 00:20:34,441
Is that how you got
in that hellacious neck brace?
518
00:20:34,443 --> 00:20:35,776
Was there an accident?
519
00:20:35,778 --> 00:20:37,578
No. Severe scoliosis.
520
00:20:37,580 --> 00:20:39,113
It stunted
my growth.
521
00:20:39,115 --> 00:20:41,482
(whispers):
But you're my size.
522
00:20:42,451 --> 00:20:44,718
Maybe on a bloaty day.
523
00:20:46,255 --> 00:20:48,122
Oh, my god.
524
00:20:48,124 --> 00:20:49,623
This is perfect.
525
00:20:49,625 --> 00:20:51,258
Chad broke up with me
because he said this house
526
00:20:51,260 --> 00:20:53,327
Is full of losers. But if
i fix you up a little bit,
527
00:20:53,329 --> 00:20:55,329
There will be one less disaster
under this roof.
528
00:20:55,331 --> 00:20:57,164
I will totally look
like someone nice.
529
00:20:57,166 --> 00:20:59,667
Mm-hmm.
I'm gonna make you over.
530
00:20:59,669 --> 00:21:02,069
Thank you. Thank you, mommy.
Thank you.
531
00:21:02,071 --> 00:21:03,737
But first...
532
00:21:03,739 --> 00:21:06,240
I'm gonna need
some pliers.
533
00:21:13,249 --> 00:21:14,748
You know,
you and i have talked
534
00:21:14,750 --> 00:21:16,283
A good game
to those kappa girls.
535
00:21:16,285 --> 00:21:18,519
And i think it's made
a big difference so far.
536
00:21:18,521 --> 00:21:20,421
And while
obviously
537
00:21:20,423 --> 00:21:22,756
I don't condone a serial killer
picking off students,
538
00:21:22,758 --> 00:21:26,293
I must say the intensity of
the experience of being hunted
539
00:21:26,295 --> 00:21:29,096
By a psychopath
has really bonded them.
540
00:21:29,098 --> 00:21:30,431
I don't know
541
00:21:30,433 --> 00:21:32,333
If it'll stick, though.
You know,
that's been
542
00:21:32,335 --> 00:21:33,334
My worry exactly.
543
00:21:33,336 --> 00:21:35,836
Which is why we have
to up our game,
544
00:21:35,838 --> 00:21:40,107
Lead by example, show them
how two very different women
545
00:21:40,109 --> 00:21:41,775
Can work together and get along.
546
00:21:41,777 --> 00:21:42,943
Which is
why you and i
547
00:21:42,945 --> 00:21:45,512
Are moving into kappa house
for a week.
548
00:21:46,215 --> 00:21:47,448
Wait, seriously?
549
00:21:47,450 --> 00:21:48,782
Gigi.
550
00:21:49,885 --> 00:21:51,552
You're terrible at tennis.
551
00:21:51,554 --> 00:21:52,886
I'm gonna leave.
552
00:21:52,888 --> 00:21:54,388
Pack up your stuff
this afternoon.
553
00:21:54,390 --> 00:21:56,523
We move into kappa house
tonight.
554
00:21:56,525 --> 00:21:58,525
And, uh, do yourself a favor.
555
00:21:58,527 --> 00:22:00,227
Stay away from my man.
556
00:22:00,229 --> 00:22:02,196
Wes and i
are kind of
557
00:22:02,198 --> 00:22:03,530
An item,
558
00:22:03,532 --> 00:22:06,066
And i call dibs.
559
00:22:06,068 --> 00:22:09,470
You can't call
dibs on a person.
560
00:22:11,006 --> 00:22:12,506
Chanel #3:
Hi, sam.
561
00:22:12,508 --> 00:22:13,707
Geez. Hi.
562
00:22:13,709 --> 00:22:15,976
Number three.
So, listen.
563
00:22:15,978 --> 00:22:17,978
There's something i want
to talk to you about.
564
00:22:17,980 --> 00:22:19,813
I sort of feel like
you and i are two peas
565
00:22:19,815 --> 00:22:21,548
In a pod, don't you?
566
00:22:21,550 --> 00:22:23,350
I mean, we're both
really smart,
567
00:22:23,352 --> 00:22:25,185
And when we talk,
it's really meaningful.
568
00:22:25,187 --> 00:22:26,553
Hold on. Wait.
Are you a lesbian?
569
00:22:26,555 --> 00:22:28,422
No. No, no, no, no, no.
570
00:22:28,424 --> 00:22:30,557
What i'm trying to say is,
i feel like
571
00:22:30,559 --> 00:22:32,159
We get along really well,
and i would like it
572
00:22:32,161 --> 00:22:34,561
If we could become... Friends.
573
00:22:34,563 --> 00:22:36,497
But, like, good friends.
574
00:22:36,499 --> 00:22:39,266
Like, best friends. Like...
575
00:22:39,268 --> 00:22:40,968
Soul mates.
576
00:22:45,007 --> 00:22:46,874
Because there's something
i want to tell you,
577
00:22:46,876 --> 00:22:49,243
And i can only tell it
to my soul mate
578
00:22:49,245 --> 00:22:52,212
Because it's dark, and no one
else can find out about it.
579
00:22:52,214 --> 00:22:55,082
Do you promise me
you can keep a secret?
580
00:22:55,084 --> 00:22:56,750
Yeah.
581
00:22:56,752 --> 00:22:58,185
Okay.
582
00:22:58,187 --> 00:23:00,587
You know swenson?
The frozen dinners?
583
00:23:00,589 --> 00:23:02,790
They're like the b-list
of swanson frozen dinners.
584
00:23:02,792 --> 00:23:04,858
Like swanson
for poor people?
585
00:23:05,861 --> 00:23:07,861
I'm a swenson.
586
00:23:07,863 --> 00:23:09,997
As in swenson swenson.
587
00:23:11,200 --> 00:23:13,267
We're, like, billionaires.
588
00:23:13,269 --> 00:23:15,269
That's great.
589
00:23:15,271 --> 00:23:16,637
I sort of don't think
that's a terrible secret.
590
00:23:16,639 --> 00:23:18,705
No, that's not the secret.
591
00:23:18,707 --> 00:23:20,107
This is the secret.
592
00:23:20,109 --> 00:23:22,776
My dad is not my real dad.
593
00:23:22,778 --> 00:23:24,111
See, my mom is crazy
594
00:23:24,113 --> 00:23:25,779
And always thinks aliens
are talking to her,
595
00:23:25,781 --> 00:23:27,114
And the year before i was born,
596
00:23:27,116 --> 00:23:29,783
She started corresponding
with this really bad man,
597
00:23:29,785 --> 00:23:31,118
Who's in prison
because he's responsible
598
00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:33,787
For the deaths
of, like, a lot of people.
599
00:23:33,789 --> 00:23:35,789
And my mom evidently arranged
600
00:23:35,791 --> 00:23:37,124
These conjugal visits
with this guy,
601
00:23:37,126 --> 00:23:40,127
And so last year
i took a dna test,
602
00:23:40,129 --> 00:23:43,464
And i found out
this guy's my real father.
603
00:23:43,466 --> 00:23:44,665
Who's the guy?
604
00:23:44,667 --> 00:23:47,067
Charles manson.
605
00:23:47,069 --> 00:23:48,735
What? Are you serious?
606
00:23:48,737 --> 00:23:50,404
That's insane.
607
00:23:50,406 --> 00:23:52,473
But wait, if you don't want
anyone to find out, why tell me?
608
00:23:52,475 --> 00:23:54,475
Because there's
a murderer on the loose,
609
00:23:54,477 --> 00:23:55,809
And no one knows who it is,
610
00:23:55,811 --> 00:23:57,811
And if someone found out
my dad is charles manson,
611
00:23:57,813 --> 00:24:00,147
Everyone would immediately
assume the killer is me.
612
00:24:00,149 --> 00:24:01,582
Which it isn't.
613
00:24:01,584 --> 00:24:03,784
Okay, well, what do
you want me to do?
614
00:24:03,786 --> 00:24:05,786
If and when the next
murder happens,
615
00:24:05,788 --> 00:24:08,121
I need an alibi to prove
it could not have been me.
616
00:24:08,123 --> 00:24:09,790
Which it won't be
because i'm not the killer.
617
00:24:09,792 --> 00:24:13,126
But no one knows when or where
the next murder will happen.
618
00:24:13,128 --> 00:24:16,463
But when it does,
i need you to be my alibi.
619
00:24:16,465 --> 00:24:19,132
And i can be your alibi, too.
620
00:24:19,134 --> 00:24:22,169
We'll be alibi buddies.
621
00:24:22,171 --> 00:24:24,171
"alibibuddies."
622
00:24:24,173 --> 00:24:26,340
"alibib..."
uh, i think "alibuddies."
623
00:24:26,342 --> 00:24:28,642
Right, alibuddies.
624
00:24:28,644 --> 00:24:30,711
So it's a deal?
Deal.
625
00:24:32,848 --> 00:24:34,181
Hey, number five.
626
00:24:34,183 --> 00:24:36,683
Um, we've been doing some
snooping about chanel #2.
627
00:24:36,685 --> 00:24:39,786
Did you know she secretly dated
chad radwell last year?
628
00:24:39,788 --> 00:24:41,855
What?!
Zayday:
I know, shocking.
629
00:24:41,857 --> 00:24:43,624
Can you believe she'd do
something like that to chanel?
630
00:24:43,626 --> 00:24:44,958
Uh, well, chanel's a bitch
631
00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:46,627
Who deserves whatever's
coming to her.
632
00:24:46,629 --> 00:24:48,195
I just can't believe
that chad didn't tell me.
633
00:24:48,197 --> 00:24:49,563
I mean, we were dating, too.
634
00:24:49,565 --> 00:24:52,566
Chad radwell? I dated
him, too, last year.
635
00:24:52,568 --> 00:24:53,634
Okay, wait, you
both went out with
636
00:24:53,636 --> 00:24:55,569
Your friend's boyfriend
behind her back?
637
00:24:55,571 --> 00:24:58,038
Well, to be fair, we
only went on one date,
638
00:24:58,040 --> 00:24:59,540
And it was really
weird, like, he made me
639
00:24:59,542 --> 00:25:02,409
Just watch him play with his
knife collection the whole time.
640
00:25:02,411 --> 00:25:04,745
I mean, i still slept with him.
641
00:25:04,747 --> 00:25:06,079
But my heart wasn't
totally in it.
642
00:25:06,081 --> 00:25:07,414
Chanel:
Bitches, gather round.
643
00:25:07,416 --> 00:25:09,716
Holy mother of god,
what is this?
644
00:25:09,718 --> 00:25:11,785
("two of hearts" by stacey q
playing)
645
00:25:13,489 --> 00:25:16,890
♪ i-i-i-i-i-i need,
i need you ♪
646
00:25:16,892 --> 00:25:20,594
♪ i-i-i-i-i-i need, i need you ♪
647
00:25:20,596 --> 00:25:24,498
♪ i-i-i-i-i-i need,
i need you... ♪
648
00:25:24,500 --> 00:25:27,167
Bitches, i'd like you
to meet chanel #6.
649
00:25:27,169 --> 00:25:31,738
♪ two of hearts,
two hearts that beat as one ♪
650
00:25:31,740 --> 00:25:35,075
♪ two of hearts,
i need you, i need you. ♪
651
00:25:35,077 --> 00:25:37,077
No way, no freaking way!
652
00:25:37,079 --> 00:25:39,079
You can't make a
pledge a chanel.
653
00:25:39,081 --> 00:25:40,948
What do you want me to do?
Two chanels are dead.
654
00:25:40,950 --> 00:25:42,749
I need chanels,
and i'm running out of minions.
655
00:25:42,751 --> 00:25:45,419
Hester, you took
your neck brace off,
656
00:25:45,421 --> 00:25:47,421
And you look, um, amazing.
657
00:25:47,423 --> 00:25:48,589
Hester: My muscles
have atrophied,
658
00:25:48,591 --> 00:25:50,257
And the pain from
not wearing my brace
659
00:25:50,259 --> 00:25:51,592
Has me on the verge
of passing out,
660
00:25:51,594 --> 00:25:53,961
But i've never been
happier in my whole life.
661
00:25:53,963 --> 00:25:56,463
Chanel says i can hold her
hair back now on purge nights.
662
00:25:56,465 --> 00:25:57,464
(mouths)
663
00:25:57,466 --> 00:26:00,133
This will not stand!
664
00:26:00,135 --> 00:26:02,135
You don't have
any respect for any of us
665
00:26:02,137 --> 00:26:03,470
Or the rules of this house.
666
00:26:03,472 --> 00:26:06,440
You don't deserve
to be president.
667
00:26:06,442 --> 00:26:08,108
She does have a point.
668
00:26:08,110 --> 00:26:11,278
Okay, pledges, line up
for tonight's festivities.
669
00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:13,880
We're going to play a game
called cocaine or dildo.
670
00:26:13,882 --> 00:26:16,583
Munsch:
Ooh, that sounds fun
671
00:26:16,585 --> 00:26:18,585
But also kind
of like hazing
672
00:26:18,587 --> 00:26:20,954
And illegal in, like,
what, six different ways.
673
00:26:20,956 --> 00:26:25,125
But i brought
trivial pursuit: '90s edition.
674
00:26:25,127 --> 00:26:28,629
Sounds boffo, but we're having
a house-only night tonight.
675
00:26:28,631 --> 00:26:31,298
Okay, works for us.
676
00:26:31,300 --> 00:26:33,967
We're moving in, to keep
an eye on you girls,
677
00:26:33,969 --> 00:26:35,535
For the rest of the week.
678
00:26:45,648 --> 00:26:47,247
All right, everybody listen up.
679
00:26:47,249 --> 00:26:48,315
Chad radwell at the podium.
680
00:26:48,317 --> 00:26:49,983
Senior council, now in session.
681
00:26:49,985 --> 00:26:53,153
As we all know, boone's death
was ruled a suicide.
682
00:26:53,155 --> 00:26:55,155
Wait, wait, i heard a rumor
683
00:26:55,157 --> 00:26:57,257
Boone killed himself.
That's what i just said.
684
00:26:57,259 --> 00:26:58,992
Well, i heard that he killed
himself because he was gay.
685
00:26:58,994 --> 00:27:01,662
There's no way
boone was gay.
686
00:27:01,664 --> 00:27:02,996
He didn't seem gay at all.
687
00:27:02,998 --> 00:27:04,331
You know, one time we
were talking about boobs
688
00:27:04,333 --> 00:27:06,767
And how much i love them,
and he was like,
689
00:27:06,769 --> 00:27:09,436
"yeah, dude, i love boobs, too."
690
00:27:09,438 --> 00:27:11,805
So, like, what am i
supposed to do with that?
691
00:27:11,807 --> 00:27:13,407
Guys, boone was gay.
692
00:27:14,510 --> 00:27:16,510
He told me.
693
00:27:16,512 --> 00:27:18,345
But i don't think
it was a suicide.
What?!
694
00:27:18,347 --> 00:27:20,681
Guys, boone's throat
was sliced open,
695
00:27:20,683 --> 00:27:24,117
Which, a, is an unusual way
to kill yourself, and, b,
696
00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:26,119
When the cops let me
into the dining room
697
00:27:26,121 --> 00:27:27,954
To get my iliad cliffnotes,
698
00:27:27,956 --> 00:27:30,691
I saw footprints leading
away from the body.
699
00:27:30,693 --> 00:27:32,025
This pair of bloody footprints
700
00:27:32,027 --> 00:27:33,694
Led downstairs to the bathroom,
701
00:27:33,696 --> 00:27:36,196
Stopped in front of the toilet,
and then led back to the body,
702
00:27:36,198 --> 00:27:39,866
Which means that if boone
did kill himself,
703
00:27:39,868 --> 00:27:42,369
He slit his own throat,
laid down to die,
704
00:27:42,371 --> 00:27:44,037
Realized he had to use
the bathroom,
705
00:27:44,039 --> 00:27:46,373
So he walked downstairs,
urinated,
706
00:27:46,375 --> 00:27:49,710
And then walked back to the
exact place he was lying before
707
00:27:49,712 --> 00:27:50,877
And then died.
708
00:27:50,879 --> 00:27:54,548
Guys, i think boone
was murdered.
709
00:27:54,550 --> 00:27:57,050
There's a killer on this campus,
710
00:27:57,052 --> 00:27:59,920
And now he's targeting
the dickie dollar scholars,
711
00:27:59,922 --> 00:28:01,321
So i think it's high time
712
00:28:01,323 --> 00:28:03,390
The dickie dollar scholars
do something about it.
713
00:28:03,392 --> 00:28:05,058
What?
That take back the night rally?
714
00:28:05,060 --> 00:28:06,059
That was a joke.
715
00:28:06,061 --> 00:28:07,260
I say we do the opposite
716
00:28:07,262 --> 00:28:08,562
Of "take back the night."
717
00:28:08,564 --> 00:28:09,596
I say we get 'roided up,
718
00:28:09,598 --> 00:28:11,264
Find a bunch of baseball bats,
719
00:28:11,266 --> 00:28:13,567
Roam around the streets
yelling the red devil's name
720
00:28:13,569 --> 00:28:15,235
Until he comes out
and fights us.
721
00:28:15,237 --> 00:28:16,603
You really reckon
that will work?
722
00:28:16,605 --> 00:28:17,938
Dude, in the ghetto,
723
00:28:17,940 --> 00:28:19,272
If you run around the streets
with baseball bats,
724
00:28:19,274 --> 00:28:20,607
Yelling the red devil's name,
725
00:28:20,609 --> 00:28:22,275
They have to come out
and fight you.
726
00:28:22,277 --> 00:28:23,944
There's a whole code;
believe me, i know.
727
00:28:23,946 --> 00:28:27,180
Now, let's pop some gym candy,
head down to the white stallion,
728
00:28:27,182 --> 00:28:30,450
Get our drink on and avenge
the murder of brother boone!
729
00:28:30,452 --> 00:28:34,287
(everyone shouts)
730
00:28:34,289 --> 00:28:35,822
Dickie dollar scholars!
731
00:28:39,461 --> 00:28:41,528
(knocking on door)
732
00:28:42,798 --> 00:28:44,464
Grace:
Hey.
733
00:28:44,466 --> 00:28:46,600
Can i come in?
734
00:28:46,602 --> 00:28:48,034
Yeah, sure.
735
00:28:53,108 --> 00:28:56,777
Look, i'm really sorry that i
didn't respond to your messages,
736
00:28:56,779 --> 00:28:59,479
And also that i thought
you were a serial killer.
737
00:28:59,481 --> 00:29:01,615
It's cool, stuff happens.
738
00:29:01,617 --> 00:29:02,949
I just think
it's probably best
739
00:29:02,951 --> 00:29:05,285
To be extra cautious
in these situations.
740
00:29:05,287 --> 00:29:06,953
But i do think i was mistaken.
741
00:29:08,157 --> 00:29:09,623
What do you think
about chad radwell?
742
00:29:09,625 --> 00:29:11,725
Oh, no, you're not
dating him, are you?
743
00:29:11,727 --> 00:29:14,027
What?! No, i think
he's the killer.
744
00:29:15,297 --> 00:29:17,264
Okay, well, i found some things.
745
00:29:17,266 --> 00:29:18,899
You show me yours,
i'll show you mine.
746
00:29:18,901 --> 00:29:21,568
Mm-hmm, all right,
well, first of all,
747
00:29:21,570 --> 00:29:23,570
Chad radwell is a man-whore.
748
00:29:23,572 --> 00:29:26,406
Like, he has literally had sex
with every girl in kappa.
749
00:29:26,408 --> 00:29:27,741
That is not news.
750
00:29:27,743 --> 00:29:29,976
Okay, but take that to build
a psychological profile.
751
00:29:29,978 --> 00:29:31,812
He clearly sees
people as objects.
752
00:29:31,814 --> 00:29:34,481
Sociopathic murderers
dehumanize their prey.
753
00:29:34,483 --> 00:29:37,150
Also he's got some sort of,
like, knife obsession thing.
754
00:29:37,152 --> 00:29:39,152
Look, i can't stand the guy,
but do you have any proof
755
00:29:39,154 --> 00:29:41,588
Of him being anywhere near
the crime scenes, any motive?
756
00:29:41,590 --> 00:29:43,256
No, but, ugh,
i'm telling you,
757
00:29:43,258 --> 00:29:45,091
The motive has something to do
with whatever happened
758
00:29:45,093 --> 00:29:47,427
In the kappa bathroom
20 years ago.
759
00:29:47,429 --> 00:29:49,763
I mean, what if chad radwell
is that baby all grown up,
760
00:29:49,765 --> 00:29:51,331
And he's come back
to get his revenge?
761
00:29:51,333 --> 00:29:53,967
Hmm.
We have to find out more
about who that baby was.
762
00:29:53,969 --> 00:29:55,836
If it was a boy,
then it has to be chad.
763
00:29:55,838 --> 00:29:57,170
Interesting you
should say that.
764
00:29:57,172 --> 00:29:58,505
'cause while you
were ignoring me,
765
00:29:58,507 --> 00:30:00,006
Thinking i was a
psychotic murderer...
766
00:30:00,008 --> 00:30:02,008
Oh, my god, pete, moving on.
767
00:30:02,010 --> 00:30:03,443
...I did some gumshoe work.
768
00:30:04,780 --> 00:30:06,313
All right.
769
00:30:06,315 --> 00:30:08,315
So i couldn't connect
any of these names
770
00:30:08,317 --> 00:30:09,983
To kappa
or to the university.
771
00:30:09,985 --> 00:30:10,984
I don't know if they changed
their names,
772
00:30:10,986 --> 00:30:12,319
Got married, got murdered.
773
00:30:12,321 --> 00:30:14,888
But there's absolutely
no record of any of these names
774
00:30:14,890 --> 00:30:17,157
Except for one, and
that is greenwell.
775
00:30:17,159 --> 00:30:18,658
Well, who is she?
776
00:30:18,660 --> 00:30:21,361
Only a former kappa sister
who dropped out of school
777
00:30:21,363 --> 00:30:23,864
Just two credits
shy from graduating
778
00:30:23,866 --> 00:30:25,665
The same year
that baby was born.
779
00:30:25,667 --> 00:30:27,200
It's kind of weird,
don't you think?
780
00:30:27,202 --> 00:30:28,869
I mean,
just two credits shy?
781
00:30:28,871 --> 00:30:30,537
Something pretty bad
had to happen
782
00:30:30,539 --> 00:30:31,872
For her to do
something like that.
783
00:30:31,874 --> 00:30:32,873
We have to find her.
784
00:30:32,875 --> 00:30:34,174
I already did.
785
00:30:34,176 --> 00:30:35,175
She's six hours away.
786
00:30:35,177 --> 00:30:36,576
Well, come on, let's go.
787
00:30:38,213 --> 00:30:40,547
♪ backstreet's back,
all right! ♪
788
00:30:40,549 --> 00:30:42,215
Chad:
Hey, red devil!
789
00:30:42,217 --> 00:30:44,217
I'm calling you out!
790
00:30:44,219 --> 00:30:45,886
This is ghetto code, brah!
791
00:30:45,888 --> 00:30:47,220
Oh, hey, red devil.
792
00:30:47,222 --> 00:30:48,555
You like me now, bro?
793
00:30:48,557 --> 00:30:51,191
You like me now when i got
a baseball bat, bro?!
794
00:30:51,193 --> 00:30:53,894
Yeah!
Boom!
Yeah!
795
00:30:53,896 --> 00:30:55,528
Huh, red devil?
796
00:30:55,530 --> 00:30:56,997
Hey, dickie
dollars, look.
797
00:30:56,999 --> 00:30:58,732
That's probably his car.
798
00:30:58,734 --> 00:31:01,301
(everyone screams)
799
00:31:02,704 --> 00:31:04,537
♪ everybody ♪
800
00:31:04,539 --> 00:31:06,873
♪ yeah ♪
801
00:31:06,875 --> 00:31:10,443
♪ rock your body, yeah ♪
802
00:31:10,445 --> 00:31:12,879
♪ everybody ♪
803
00:31:12,881 --> 00:31:14,714
(grunting, sighing)
804
00:31:14,716 --> 00:31:17,183
♪ rock your body right... ♪
805
00:31:17,185 --> 00:31:19,185
I thought this would be
a lot easier.
806
00:31:19,187 --> 00:31:21,254
(chain saw motor revs)
807
00:31:23,592 --> 00:31:24,791
Oh, hey, red devil.
808
00:31:24,793 --> 00:31:26,593
See, i told you.
809
00:31:26,595 --> 00:31:28,194
Ghetto code's a real thing.
810
00:31:28,196 --> 00:31:29,296
Let's get him!
811
00:31:29,298 --> 00:31:31,131
Yeah!
812
00:31:31,133 --> 00:31:32,799
(second chain saw motor revs)
813
00:31:34,870 --> 00:31:37,304
Oh, my god, there's
two of them!
814
00:31:40,275 --> 00:31:42,208
This is for brother boone!
815
00:31:42,210 --> 00:31:46,379
♪ everybody, yeah ♪
816
00:31:46,381 --> 00:31:48,415
♪ rock your body ♪
817
00:31:48,417 --> 00:31:52,452
♪ rock your body right ♪
818
00:31:52,454 --> 00:31:57,023
♪ backstreet's back,
all right! ♪
819
00:31:58,126 --> 00:32:00,293
Chad radwell!
820
00:32:00,295 --> 00:32:03,563
♪ all right ♪
♪ oh ♪
821
00:32:13,442 --> 00:32:15,976
♪ now throw your hands
up in the air ♪
822
00:32:18,180 --> 00:32:21,948
♪ and wave 'em around
like you just don't care ♪
823
00:32:21,950 --> 00:32:24,417
♪ and if you wanna party,
let me hear you yell ♪
824
00:32:26,355 --> 00:32:30,323
♪ 'cause we've got it
goin' on again ♪
825
00:32:32,761 --> 00:32:35,428
♪ everybody ♪
826
00:32:35,430 --> 00:32:38,031
♪ backstreet's back,
all right! ♪
827
00:32:45,340 --> 00:32:47,474
Zayday, it's
denise hemphill
828
00:32:47,476 --> 00:32:49,009
From secure enforcement
solutions.
829
00:32:49,011 --> 00:32:50,677
Hey, girl.
Hey, i need to talk to you.
830
00:32:50,679 --> 00:32:52,012
Where you heading?
831
00:32:52,014 --> 00:32:53,346
Oh, i'm just heading home
from the library.
832
00:32:53,348 --> 00:32:54,681
Let me give you a ride.
833
00:32:54,683 --> 00:32:55,682
You sure?
834
00:32:55,684 --> 00:32:57,384
I'm sure, come on.
835
00:32:57,386 --> 00:33:00,320
Thanks, so kappa house
is just right up the road.
836
00:33:00,322 --> 00:33:01,721
What are you doing?
837
00:33:01,723 --> 00:33:04,190
I'm stopping a killer,
that's what i'm doing.
838
00:33:04,192 --> 00:33:05,892
Are you crazy?
I'm gonna be late for dinner.
839
00:33:05,894 --> 00:33:08,294
But you're gonna be
right on time for justice.
840
00:33:08,296 --> 00:33:09,529
Mm-hmm.
841
00:33:09,531 --> 00:33:12,032
That's right, zayday williams,
842
00:33:12,034 --> 00:33:13,700
I'm onto you,
843
00:33:13,702 --> 00:33:15,201
And you are what
us detectives call
844
00:33:15,203 --> 00:33:18,538
A person of extreme
murderous interest.
845
00:33:18,540 --> 00:33:20,473
Okay, first of all,
no one says that,
846
00:33:20,475 --> 00:33:22,075
And also,
you're not a detective.
847
00:33:22,077 --> 00:33:26,179
Tell it to the judge,
'cause you goin' downtown.
848
00:33:26,181 --> 00:33:27,881
What exactly do you think
you found out?
849
00:33:27,883 --> 00:33:30,884
Found out everything about you,
little girl.
850
00:33:30,886 --> 00:33:32,085
Uh-huh.
851
00:33:32,087 --> 00:33:33,887
I know you thought
i was on your side
852
00:33:33,889 --> 00:33:35,355
While you were sashaying around
853
00:33:35,357 --> 00:33:37,357
In that little fancy mansion
in bel air,
854
00:33:37,359 --> 00:33:40,160
But i been onto you.
855
00:33:40,162 --> 00:33:42,095
Exhibit "a."
856
00:33:42,097 --> 00:33:44,230
You plan on
challenging chanel
857
00:33:44,232 --> 00:33:46,099
For kappa house president.
858
00:33:46,101 --> 00:33:48,935
And what better way to
knock off the competition
859
00:33:48,937 --> 00:33:51,104
Than murder in the first?
860
00:33:51,106 --> 00:33:52,405
Mm-hmm.
861
00:33:52,407 --> 00:33:53,740
Exhibit "b."
862
00:33:53,742 --> 00:33:56,910
Oh, it's just a cd
from best buy.
863
00:33:56,912 --> 00:34:00,580
The same best buy where
my good friend shondell worked.
864
00:34:00,582 --> 00:34:02,916
I was inside kappa house
when shondell got murdered.
865
00:34:02,918 --> 00:34:04,918
Which brings me
to exhibit "c."
866
00:34:04,920 --> 00:34:07,921
What if there's
more than one killer?
867
00:34:07,923 --> 00:34:09,089
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
868
00:34:09,091 --> 00:34:10,924
You and somebody else.
869
00:34:10,926 --> 00:34:12,425
Now, that would
really throw
870
00:34:12,427 --> 00:34:14,761
Secure enforcement
solutions off the scent.
871
00:34:14,763 --> 00:34:17,230
Yeah, while-while
you were in the house,
872
00:34:17,232 --> 00:34:19,199
Your murderous cohort
873
00:34:19,201 --> 00:34:21,768
Was stabbing my friend
shondell in the face.
874
00:34:21,770 --> 00:34:24,804
And while you were buried up
to your neck in the backyard,
875
00:34:24,806 --> 00:34:28,441
Your accomplice mowed off
a deaf girl's head.
876
00:34:28,443 --> 00:34:30,243
Ha! Drops the mic.
877
00:34:30,245 --> 00:34:31,911
This is insane.
878
00:34:31,913 --> 00:34:33,446
No, no, no, no, no.
879
00:34:33,448 --> 00:34:37,250
What's insane are your tweets
to the executive producer
880
00:34:37,252 --> 00:34:39,853
Of the hit tv show
how to get away with murder.
881
00:34:40,789 --> 00:34:41,821
Exhibit "d."
882
00:34:41,823 --> 00:34:43,289
Uh-huh.
883
00:34:43,291 --> 00:34:44,958
Six months ago, you tweeted:
884
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:48,761
"@shondarhimes if annalise
keating really wanted
885
00:34:48,763 --> 00:34:51,464
"to get away with murder,
she'd find a partner
886
00:34:51,466 --> 00:34:52,832
"and work as a team!
887
00:34:52,834 --> 00:34:54,667
#cahoots."
888
00:34:54,669 --> 00:34:55,835
That's not evidence.
889
00:34:55,837 --> 00:34:56,836
I just like the show!
890
00:34:56,838 --> 00:34:59,139
#cahoots!
Okay.
You know what?
891
00:34:59,141 --> 00:35:00,473
I'm gonna use the hand
892
00:35:00,475 --> 00:35:02,142
You forgot to handcuff
893
00:35:02,144 --> 00:35:03,643
And call 911.
894
00:35:03,645 --> 00:35:05,311
Well, you might want to call
895
00:35:05,313 --> 00:35:07,313
Defense attorney alan dershowitz
896
00:35:07,315 --> 00:35:09,149
When you see exhibit "e."
897
00:35:09,151 --> 00:35:10,450
Uh-huh.
898
00:35:10,452 --> 00:35:12,785
See, you, zayday williams,
899
00:35:12,787 --> 00:35:15,855
Have a chain saw under your bed.
900
00:35:15,857 --> 00:35:18,458
Oh! What?
901
00:35:18,460 --> 00:35:21,161
Supersleuth denise hemphill
902
00:35:21,163 --> 00:35:23,429
Found it.
903
00:35:23,431 --> 00:35:24,998
I can explain that.
904
00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:27,333
Explain it to the d.A.,
soul sister!
905
00:35:27,335 --> 00:35:29,035
My grandmama sent me
that chain saw.
906
00:35:29,037 --> 00:35:30,036
Say what, now?
907
00:35:30,038 --> 00:35:31,337
When they took away our tasers,
908
00:35:31,339 --> 00:35:32,839
My grandmama sent me
that chain saw
909
00:35:32,841 --> 00:35:34,274
To keep under my bed
for protection.
910
00:35:34,276 --> 00:35:35,508
S...
911
00:35:35,510 --> 00:35:37,510
So your grandmother
gave you the chain saw.
912
00:35:37,512 --> 00:35:38,511
Yes.
913
00:35:38,513 --> 00:35:39,946
And i'd like it
if you put it back
914
00:35:39,948 --> 00:35:41,147
Right where you found it.
915
00:35:41,149 --> 00:35:42,315
Okay.
916
00:35:42,317 --> 00:35:45,685
I... Am gonna let you go.
917
00:35:45,687 --> 00:35:46,719
This time.
918
00:35:46,721 --> 00:35:48,555
But i'm warning you...
919
00:35:48,557 --> 00:35:50,490
I gots m'eye on you.
920
00:35:50,492 --> 00:35:53,459
You crazy as hell.
921
00:35:53,461 --> 00:35:54,694
(door shuts)
922
00:35:54,696 --> 00:35:56,763
I gots my eye on you!
923
00:35:57,799 --> 00:35:59,032
(gentle, slow music playing)
924
00:35:59,034 --> 00:36:03,203
You were so right
about salad, you know?
925
00:36:03,205 --> 00:36:04,871
It regulates the colon
926
00:36:04,873 --> 00:36:07,140
And it's not as stuffy
as going out to dinner is.
927
00:36:07,142 --> 00:36:09,042
It doesn't scream "date."
928
00:36:09,044 --> 00:36:12,879
Well, mostly what keeps this
from being a date
929
00:36:12,881 --> 00:36:14,948
Is that there are three of us.
930
00:36:15,684 --> 00:36:16,683
Well...
931
00:36:16,685 --> 00:36:18,851
Miss caldwell and i
are roomies now.
932
00:36:18,853 --> 00:36:20,320
You'll forgive me
933
00:36:20,322 --> 00:36:21,888
If i'm feeling
a little overprotective.
934
00:36:21,890 --> 00:36:25,592
Hey. I, for one, am happy
you tagged along.
935
00:36:25,594 --> 00:36:27,493
Plus, you brought
all this fun dressing!
936
00:36:27,495 --> 00:36:30,863
I'm loving this thousand island
jam i got goin' on.
937
00:36:30,865 --> 00:36:32,332
Salad tastes like a big mac.
938
00:36:34,236 --> 00:36:35,735
(bottle makes fart sound)
oh.
939
00:36:35,737 --> 00:36:37,136
(laughing)
940
00:36:42,944 --> 00:36:44,611
(sighs)
too slow.
941
00:36:53,588 --> 00:36:55,355
(phone chiming)
that's better.
942
00:36:55,357 --> 00:36:57,624
Oh, gotta go.
943
00:36:57,626 --> 00:36:59,692
(laughing)
944
00:37:03,598 --> 00:37:05,031
Hey.
945
00:37:05,033 --> 00:37:06,599
Where you guys going?
946
00:37:06,601 --> 00:37:08,268
My philosophy study group.
947
00:37:08,270 --> 00:37:09,769
But what do you mean,
"you guys"?
948
00:37:09,771 --> 00:37:10,870
I'm by myself.
949
00:37:10,872 --> 00:37:12,572
But... Where's gracie?
950
00:37:12,574 --> 00:37:13,906
I thought she was upstairs
with you.
951
00:37:13,908 --> 00:37:16,309
I don't know where she is,
actually.
952
00:37:16,311 --> 00:37:17,477
The gps said she was
in this house!
953
00:37:17,479 --> 00:37:19,979
Wait. You tracking her phone?
Yes.
954
00:37:19,981 --> 00:37:21,648
I gotta know where she is
at all times.
955
00:37:21,650 --> 00:37:23,549
Okay, well,
maybe she turned it off,
956
00:37:23,551 --> 00:37:26,052
Because serial killer or not,
that's a little creepy.
957
00:37:26,054 --> 00:37:27,253
I'm sorry, ladies,
958
00:37:27,255 --> 00:37:28,421
But i have
to go find her.
959
00:37:28,423 --> 00:37:30,623
This was really great, though.
960
00:37:36,831 --> 00:37:40,400
Well, i am about
ready to turn in.
961
00:37:40,402 --> 00:37:41,467
What do you say?
962
00:37:41,469 --> 00:37:43,503
Let's do it, roomie!
963
00:37:43,505 --> 00:37:45,571
(phone ringing)
964
00:37:46,808 --> 00:37:47,807
Hello?
965
00:37:47,809 --> 00:37:48,975
Oh, thank god.
966
00:37:48,977 --> 00:37:49,976
Where are you?
967
00:37:49,978 --> 00:37:52,178
I'm, uh, i'm at
the library.
968
00:37:52,180 --> 00:37:54,347
I thought we promised
969
00:37:54,349 --> 00:37:55,815
You would never
go anywhere alone.
970
00:37:55,817 --> 00:37:56,983
I'm not alone.
971
00:37:56,985 --> 00:37:58,017
There's, like,
a million people here.
972
00:37:58,019 --> 00:37:59,519
Look, please don't freak out.
973
00:37:59,521 --> 00:38:00,520
I'll be fine, okay?
974
00:38:00,522 --> 00:38:01,521
I'll let you know when i'm done.
975
00:38:01,523 --> 00:38:02,655
Yeah.
976
00:38:02,657 --> 00:38:04,290
Yeah, you call me
when you're done.
977
00:38:04,292 --> 00:38:05,358
Okay.
978
00:38:13,935 --> 00:38:16,336
(toilet flushes)
979
00:38:16,338 --> 00:38:18,338
(gigi gasps)
dean munsch.
980
00:38:18,340 --> 00:38:20,139
That nightgown is amazing.
981
00:38:20,141 --> 00:38:22,709
Thank you.
982
00:38:22,711 --> 00:38:24,277
Um, nighttime
really is the only time
983
00:38:24,279 --> 00:38:25,678
It's socially acceptable
to dress
984
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:27,347
Like a 19th century homesteader,
985
00:38:27,349 --> 00:38:29,982
Which is my favorite
style of dress.
986
00:38:29,984 --> 00:38:31,184
Good night.
987
00:38:31,186 --> 00:38:32,752
Good night!
988
00:38:38,893 --> 00:38:40,326
Oh!
989
00:38:40,328 --> 00:38:41,794
I almost forgot.
990
00:38:41,796 --> 00:38:42,895
I need to sleep
991
00:38:42,897 --> 00:38:44,897
With a white noise machine on.
992
00:38:44,899 --> 00:38:45,965
I hope that's okay.
993
00:38:45,967 --> 00:38:47,700
Oh! Sure!
994
00:38:47,702 --> 00:38:49,469
Go for it.
995
00:38:50,739 --> 00:38:53,773
(whale distress calls
playing)
996
00:39:04,986 --> 00:39:07,553
(loudly):
Hon, it's a little...
997
00:39:07,555 --> 00:39:09,555
Hon, it's a little loud.
998
00:39:09,557 --> 00:39:11,891
Is there any way
to turn it down a bit!?
999
00:39:11,893 --> 00:39:13,226
No, i'm sorry.
1000
00:39:13,228 --> 00:39:14,894
There's no volume control.
1001
00:39:14,896 --> 00:39:17,397
That's just how loud it is.
1002
00:39:17,399 --> 00:39:21,100
And what...
What are those noises?
1003
00:39:21,102 --> 00:39:23,669
Those are whale distress calls.
1004
00:39:23,671 --> 00:39:26,172
I find them very soothing.
1005
00:39:26,174 --> 00:39:29,208
Are there other noises
that the machine can make?
1006
00:39:29,210 --> 00:39:30,743
Oh, sure!
1007
00:39:33,615 --> 00:39:34,947
There are, like,
1008
00:39:34,949 --> 00:39:38,618
500 different
white noise settings.
1009
00:39:38,620 --> 00:39:40,286
"baboon attack."
1010
00:39:40,288 --> 00:39:42,822
(baboons hooting,
screaming, screeching)
1011
00:39:45,627 --> 00:39:49,529
"catastrophically depressurized
airplane cabin."
1012
00:39:49,531 --> 00:39:50,763
(air hissing, people screaming)
1013
00:39:54,636 --> 00:39:56,702
I don't think i'm going
to be able to sleep
1014
00:39:56,704 --> 00:39:58,304
With all that noise!
1015
00:39:58,306 --> 00:39:59,539
I'll tell you what,
we'll compromise.
1016
00:39:59,541 --> 00:40:01,274
I'll set
the machine
1017
00:40:01,276 --> 00:40:03,276
To "slasher movie"
1018
00:40:03,278 --> 00:40:05,278
And we'll leave it at that.
1019
00:40:05,280 --> 00:40:07,346
(spooky music playing)
1020
00:40:12,120 --> 00:40:14,187
(people shrieking,
screaming)
1021
00:40:15,957 --> 00:40:17,557
Yep. You know what?
1022
00:40:17,559 --> 00:40:19,959
I actually think
1023
00:40:19,961 --> 00:40:22,161
I'm gonna go ahead and...
1024
00:40:22,163 --> 00:40:24,096
(screaming and shrieking
continue)
1025
00:40:24,098 --> 00:40:25,665
I'm gonna sleep
on the couch.
1026
00:40:25,667 --> 00:40:28,067
Yeah, i think
that would be best.
1027
00:40:34,476 --> 00:40:36,509
(screaming continues
in distance)
1028
00:40:41,950 --> 00:40:44,016
(screaming fades
into distance)
1029
00:40:49,457 --> 00:40:51,057
(sighs)
1030
00:41:02,537 --> 00:41:03,603
(sighs)
1031
00:41:12,347 --> 00:41:13,379
(chain saw revving)
1032
00:41:13,381 --> 00:41:14,547
(screams)
1033
00:41:16,451 --> 00:41:18,317
(screams)
(chain saw buzzing)
1034
00:41:18,319 --> 00:41:20,386
(screaming)
1035
00:41:28,363 --> 00:41:29,929
(gasping)
1036
00:41:32,033 --> 00:41:33,432
(screaming)
1037
00:41:45,847 --> 00:41:47,079
(screams)
1038
00:41:47,081 --> 00:41:48,214
(yells)
1039
00:41:51,486 --> 00:41:52,552
(grunts)
1040
00:41:54,489 --> 00:41:55,788
(yells, groans)
1041
00:41:56,524 --> 00:41:58,558
No... No!
1042
00:41:59,394 --> 00:42:00,560
(sobbing)
1043
00:42:10,104 --> 00:42:11,270
(grunts, groans)
1044
00:42:12,674 --> 00:42:13,673
You okay?
1045
00:42:13,675 --> 00:42:14,674
I think so.
1046
00:42:14,676 --> 00:42:15,675
Girls, go!
1047
00:42:15,677 --> 00:42:17,009
Get back to your room!
1048
00:42:17,011 --> 00:42:18,077
Call 911!
1049
00:42:21,783 --> 00:42:24,283
(chain saw motor idling)
1050
00:42:31,259 --> 00:42:32,959
Munsch:
What's going on?
1051
00:42:32,961 --> 00:42:34,393
Gigi:
What's going on?!
1052
00:42:34,395 --> 00:42:36,262
Didn't you hear the screaming?
1053
00:42:36,264 --> 00:42:37,630
No!
1054
00:42:37,632 --> 00:42:39,765
I mean, yes, i heard screaming,
1055
00:42:39,767 --> 00:42:40,933
But that's because
the white noise machine
1056
00:42:40,935 --> 00:42:43,269
Was set to
"slasher movie."
1057
00:42:43,271 --> 00:42:45,137
Seriously, what happened?
1058
00:42:45,139 --> 00:42:46,606
The girls are all freaked out.
1059
00:42:46,608 --> 00:42:47,873
(revs chain saw)
1060
00:42:47,875 --> 00:42:49,609
What are you doing?
1061
00:42:49,611 --> 00:42:51,777
You're not taking
another step
1062
00:42:51,779 --> 00:42:52,812
Until the
police arrive.
1063
00:42:52,814 --> 00:42:54,547
(siren approaching)
1064
00:42:54,549 --> 00:42:56,315
You're the killer.
1065
00:43:35,323 --> 00:43:37,923
Captioned by
media access group at wgbh