1 00:00:17,067 --> 00:00:19,227 What's this? Metal detecting, are you? 2 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:24,130 - Pardon? - Metal detecting? 3 00:00:26,300 --> 00:00:28,600 - That's right. - Found anything? 4 00:00:28,633 --> 00:00:30,633 Er...bits and bobs. 5 00:00:30,667 --> 00:00:32,727 Good luck. Maybe you'll strike gold. 6 00:00:32,767 --> 00:00:34,697 Yes! See ya. 7 00:00:44,433 --> 00:00:45,433 Hello. 8 00:00:47,633 --> 00:00:49,633 Looking for treasure? 9 00:00:49,667 --> 00:00:52,267 - Something like that. - What have you found? 10 00:00:52,300 --> 00:00:54,300 - Bits and pieces. - No gold? 11 00:00:54,333 --> 00:00:57,433 - Nope. - Fingers crossed. 12 00:00:57,467 --> 00:00:59,397 Yeah. See ya. 13 00:01:02,400 --> 00:01:05,430 - All right? - This is a problem. 14 00:01:05,467 --> 00:01:08,027 It's a public footpath. Bloody ramblers coming by 15 00:01:08,067 --> 00:01:09,797 asking the same questions all the time. 16 00:01:09,833 --> 00:01:11,233 Here come some more. 17 00:01:12,633 --> 00:01:14,533 Ah, metal detectors. 18 00:01:14,567 --> 00:01:17,467 We had a metal detector once, didn't we, Rosemary? 19 00:01:17,500 --> 00:01:19,130 That's still in the garage. 20 00:01:19,167 --> 00:01:21,497 Is that so? 21 00:01:21,533 --> 00:01:23,603 - Have you found any gold? - Oh, Jesus. 22 00:01:23,633 --> 00:01:25,203 - Pardon? - No, no. No gold. 23 00:01:25,233 --> 00:01:26,403 No, no. No, no. 24 00:01:26,433 --> 00:01:29,603 - Fingers crossed. - Yeah. 25 00:01:29,633 --> 00:01:33,633 Er...tell me, how many more of you are coming through? 26 00:01:33,667 --> 00:01:36,627 Of us? About 50 today, I think. 27 00:01:43,733 --> 00:01:45,673 - Call it a day? - Probably best. 28 00:01:57,133 --> 00:02:01,733 * Will you search through the lonely earth for me? 29 00:02:01,767 --> 00:02:06,427 * Climb through the briar and bramble 30 00:02:06,467 --> 00:02:09,467 * I'll be your treasure... 31 00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:11,500 That was a good couple of hours. 32 00:02:11,533 --> 00:02:13,533 You getting good stuff? 33 00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:15,067 Me too. 34 00:02:16,167 --> 00:02:18,297 Bloody ramblers notwithstanding. 35 00:02:18,333 --> 00:02:20,333 All Roman. Nothing spectacular but... 36 00:02:20,367 --> 00:02:22,827 Five of these bronzes and that's part of something. 37 00:02:22,867 --> 00:02:25,027 Not sure what. 38 00:02:25,067 --> 00:02:29,027 Same here. Roman grots. Four or five of 'em. 39 00:02:30,467 --> 00:02:32,227 How many times have we searched this field 40 00:02:32,267 --> 00:02:35,327 and only now it starts throwing up its treasure? 41 00:02:35,367 --> 00:02:36,697 In six weeks' time, 42 00:02:36,733 --> 00:02:39,303 this'll be solar panels as far as the eye can see. 43 00:02:40,300 --> 00:02:41,770 Less than six weeks. 44 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:44,400 Doesn't exactly make your heart sing, does it? 45 00:02:44,433 --> 00:02:47,633 Oh, well. Set biscitus deteriatum. 46 00:02:49,167 --> 00:02:51,427 - See University Challenge? - Yeah. 47 00:02:52,867 --> 00:02:54,797 What three-letter generic name 48 00:02:54,833 --> 00:02:56,833 is given to the bird family Paridae? 49 00:02:56,867 --> 00:02:58,827 - Bzzz. - Balliol, Potts. 50 00:02:58,867 --> 00:03:01,227 - Tit. - Tit is correct! Yes! 51 00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:05,100 Classic. 52 00:03:05,133 --> 00:03:07,133 Hello, there! 53 00:03:07,167 --> 00:03:08,997 Ah, speaking of tits. 54 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:14,330 Heeeello, there. 55 00:03:14,367 --> 00:03:16,267 What are you doing here? 56 00:03:16,300 --> 00:03:18,770 Just er...passing by. 57 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:20,470 You're always just passing by. 58 00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:22,500 You must come miles out of your way to pass by. 59 00:03:24,067 --> 00:03:26,067 It must seem like that, yes. 60 00:03:26,100 --> 00:03:30,330 No, er...we haven't seen you since your amazing find. 61 00:03:30,367 --> 00:03:34,267 Your golden aestel. Wanted to congratulate you, actually. 62 00:03:34,300 --> 00:03:35,670 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 63 00:03:35,700 --> 00:03:37,700 Really fantastic. 64 00:03:37,733 --> 00:03:39,473 How does it feel? 65 00:03:39,500 --> 00:03:43,300 To have a piece with my name under it in the British Museum? 66 00:03:43,333 --> 00:03:46,233 Er...it feels good. 67 00:03:47,567 --> 00:03:49,567 I imagine it does. 68 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:52,430 Well, congratulations. Here's to you. 69 00:03:52,467 --> 00:03:53,827 Mrs Robinson. 70 00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:55,267 - Pardon? - Nothing. 71 00:03:55,300 --> 00:03:57,470 Is that all you came to say? 72 00:03:57,500 --> 00:04:00,830 That, and to er... 73 00:04:00,867 --> 00:04:04,627 ..wave a white flag... so to speak. 74 00:04:04,667 --> 00:04:08,267 Don't you think it's time we put our differences behind us? 75 00:04:08,300 --> 00:04:10,070 Maybe pool resources. 76 00:04:10,100 --> 00:04:11,300 What resources? 77 00:04:11,333 --> 00:04:13,273 Well...our permissions. 78 00:04:13,300 --> 00:04:15,530 We've got more than enough land to detect on. 79 00:04:15,567 --> 00:04:20,667 And this farm here, it's...far too big for just the two of you. 80 00:04:20,700 --> 00:04:23,300 If you've got more than enough land, why come here? 81 00:04:23,333 --> 00:04:26,433 - Sometimes it's good... - I wasn't talking to you, Paul. 82 00:04:29,067 --> 00:04:31,297 More choice. Different topography. 83 00:04:31,333 --> 00:04:33,733 You don't have any permissions, do you? 84 00:04:33,767 --> 00:04:36,667 - We do. - Oh, yeah? Where? 85 00:04:36,700 --> 00:04:40,100 I'm not gonna tell you, am I? Unless you agree to share. 86 00:04:40,133 --> 00:04:42,073 Oh, right. 87 00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:46,597 We have some prime locations. 88 00:04:46,633 --> 00:04:48,573 Oh, do you? 89 00:04:52,067 --> 00:04:53,567 I know what you're doing. 90 00:04:54,533 --> 00:04:55,803 What am I doing? 91 00:04:55,833 --> 00:04:58,233 - A Jimmy Waffle-on. - No, I'm not. 92 00:04:58,267 --> 00:05:00,367 I've just got an itchy chin, that's all. 93 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,470 I've got a bit of an itchy chin, as well. 94 00:05:02,500 --> 00:05:06,230 - Tell us about the permissions. - And now you're both doing it. 95 00:05:06,267 --> 00:05:09,227 You're both doing a Jimmy Waffle-on. 96 00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:11,267 Aren't they? Chinny reckon? 97 00:05:11,300 --> 00:05:12,370 - Yeah. - Mm-hm. 98 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:16,730 - No, we're not. - We've got itchy chins is all. 99 00:05:16,767 --> 00:05:18,767 Really? 100 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,800 Pathetic. 101 00:05:20,833 --> 00:05:22,773 Come on, Paul. 102 00:05:30,467 --> 00:05:31,767 Spanners. 103 00:05:53,733 --> 00:05:55,673 Kate? Are you here? 104 00:05:58,133 --> 00:06:00,103 Kate, can I have a word? 105 00:06:00,133 --> 00:06:02,073 Just a minute. 106 00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:09,373 Hello, Dad. Sorry, I'm running late again. 107 00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:12,670 - Kate, we need to have a chat. - Can we take this poster down? 108 00:06:13,833 --> 00:06:15,833 The tennis lady? Why? 109 00:06:15,867 --> 00:06:17,427 Don't you think it's tacky? 110 00:06:17,467 --> 00:06:19,297 Tacky? No. 111 00:06:19,333 --> 00:06:22,533 And a bit... Well... degrading to women. 112 00:06:22,567 --> 00:06:25,067 Kate, she's scratching her bottom. 113 00:06:25,100 --> 00:06:27,370 Dad, she's got no knickers on. 114 00:06:28,467 --> 00:06:30,327 Hasn't she? 115 00:06:30,367 --> 00:06:32,297 I'm late. I'll talk to you later. 116 00:06:34,567 --> 00:06:37,597 - Oh, Dad? - Hm? 117 00:06:37,633 --> 00:06:40,573 I think there's a squirrel in the flat. 118 00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:42,530 See ya. 119 00:07:02,667 --> 00:07:04,597 Heurrggh! 120 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:07,170 Yargh! 121 00:07:10,700 --> 00:07:12,030 Oyoh! 122 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:29,800 Yargh! 123 00:07:33,100 --> 00:07:35,030 Ahhh! 124 00:07:38,133 --> 00:07:40,073 Argh! Argh! 125 00:07:41,433 --> 00:07:42,533 Oohhhh! 126 00:07:42,567 --> 00:07:46,167 Oh, bloody hell! Oh, bloody, bloody hell! 127 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,200 It was terrible. 128 00:07:48,233 --> 00:07:50,233 I was going from room to room 129 00:07:50,267 --> 00:07:53,027 with a saucepan and a mop handle, 130 00:07:53,067 --> 00:07:55,667 poking under the furniture, shaking curtains. 131 00:07:55,700 --> 00:07:58,370 It took me an hour and a half to search the flat. 132 00:07:58,400 --> 00:08:00,470 - And no squirrel? - Didn't find one. 133 00:08:00,500 --> 00:08:02,430 She was winding you up. 134 00:08:04,100 --> 00:08:06,630 - Think she was winding me up? - Sounds like a wind-up. 135 00:08:10,467 --> 00:08:12,627 That's what it's like. Chaos. 136 00:08:12,667 --> 00:08:16,097 And she never sticks to a plan so I never know if she's in. 137 00:08:16,133 --> 00:08:20,503 Where does that leave us if you can't stay with me on my boat? 138 00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:23,333 I've been looking into remedies for sea-sickness. 139 00:08:23,367 --> 00:08:26,527 So have I. I think you should try hypnotherapy. 140 00:08:28,367 --> 00:08:31,227 I've always tried to steer clear of the mystical. 141 00:08:31,267 --> 00:08:32,567 It's not mystical. 142 00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:34,600 It is a bit mystical. 143 00:08:34,633 --> 00:08:37,303 I'm not afraid of boats. 144 00:08:37,333 --> 00:08:39,333 It's the movement. 145 00:08:39,367 --> 00:08:41,427 Hypnotists can't stop the boat from moving. 146 00:08:41,467 --> 00:08:43,727 Maybe you can. In your head. 147 00:08:43,767 --> 00:08:45,797 Let me get you an appointment. 148 00:08:48,433 --> 00:08:50,203 Wow... 149 00:08:50,233 --> 00:08:53,033 Take a brave man to go poking around in here. 150 00:08:54,467 --> 00:08:57,097 Who knows what might be unleashed? 151 00:09:06,533 --> 00:09:09,573 I don't understand what we're doing here. 152 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:12,800 Tim. There's nothing down here. 153 00:09:14,233 --> 00:09:15,503 Give it another hour. 154 00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:18,070 Tim. 155 00:09:20,300 --> 00:09:23,730 Tim. I think you'd better come see this. 156 00:09:23,767 --> 00:09:25,697 - Where's this? - Just over here. 157 00:09:39,167 --> 00:09:40,597 Amazing. 158 00:09:41,833 --> 00:09:43,703 See the flagstones protecting it? 159 00:09:43,733 --> 00:09:45,403 As if it was preserved on purpose. 160 00:09:45,433 --> 00:09:47,133 A layer of sand, then stones on top. 161 00:09:47,167 --> 00:09:48,627 Do we know how far it extends? 162 00:09:48,667 --> 00:09:52,127 At least four foot in that direction but maybe further. 163 00:09:52,167 --> 00:09:54,797 - Cover it up. - Huh? 164 00:09:54,833 --> 00:09:56,603 Get a tarp or something. 165 00:09:57,700 --> 00:09:59,470 Cover it up. 166 00:10:02,667 --> 00:10:04,167 Hello. 167 00:10:05,733 --> 00:10:08,133 Hello. 168 00:10:08,167 --> 00:10:10,167 Over here. How are you? 169 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:12,130 Good to see you. 170 00:10:17,833 --> 00:10:19,733 It's all there, Becks. It has to be. 171 00:10:19,767 --> 00:10:23,397 I reckon the stones were put down to protect the mosaic. 172 00:10:25,233 --> 00:10:27,173 I can see you. 173 00:10:47,067 --> 00:10:49,167 I think the whole floor might be complete. 174 00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:51,700 I took off the edge stone and the mosaic was right there. 175 00:10:51,733 --> 00:10:53,673 It's so beautiful, look. 176 00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,727 - Oh, weird. - What? 177 00:11:01,767 --> 00:11:04,427 I took at least five photos. They're not here. 178 00:11:04,467 --> 00:11:07,097 - Are you sure you saved them? - Balls. Where are they? 179 00:11:07,133 --> 00:11:10,473 Doesn't matter. I'll take some more when we lift the stones. 180 00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:12,500 - Brilliant. Congratulations. - Thank you. 181 00:11:12,533 --> 00:11:15,673 And you know what? I saw, at last, some enthusiasm in Tim. 182 00:11:15,700 --> 00:11:19,030 Usually nothing stirs him. But he got quite emotional. 183 00:11:19,067 --> 00:11:21,727 Well, good. Sounds like it's working out. 184 00:11:21,767 --> 00:11:23,497 Yeah. Yeah. 185 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:26,230 I think it's working out. 186 00:11:29,833 --> 00:11:33,333 He can't make me do anything against my will? 187 00:11:33,367 --> 00:11:36,667 You're always fully conscious. Just in a very relaxed state. 188 00:11:36,700 --> 00:11:38,700 So... 189 00:11:38,733 --> 00:11:41,473 He can't make me say anything I'll regret later? 190 00:11:41,500 --> 00:11:42,600 No. 191 00:11:42,633 --> 00:11:45,403 Ah. Nothing specific. 192 00:11:46,467 --> 00:11:49,327 Not hiding anything... 193 00:11:49,367 --> 00:11:51,367 to my knowledge. 194 00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:53,770 - Just chill. - I'm just saying. 195 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,730 I don't want to blurt anything out. 196 00:11:57,067 --> 00:11:59,827 Do people tend to blurt? 197 00:11:59,867 --> 00:12:01,497 There's very little blurting. 198 00:12:01,533 --> 00:12:03,473 Oh, good. Good. 199 00:12:05,700 --> 00:12:07,400 - Mr Stater? - Yes. 200 00:12:07,433 --> 00:12:08,803 Would you like to come through? 201 00:12:08,833 --> 00:12:10,833 - Why? - For your treatment. 202 00:12:10,867 --> 00:12:12,227 I'm Dr Hoffmann. 203 00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:15,733 Are you? 204 00:12:15,767 --> 00:12:17,127 Is she? 205 00:12:17,167 --> 00:12:18,767 Yes! That's Dr Hoffmann. 206 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:23,170 Oh, yeah. Great. Good. Yeah. 207 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:25,000 Let's go. 208 00:12:28,467 --> 00:12:30,267 - Don't be nervous. - I'm not nervous. 209 00:12:30,300 --> 00:12:32,230 Try to relax. 210 00:12:35,367 --> 00:12:37,297 - I want this to work. - Me too. 211 00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:53,800 Just take a seat there and make yourself comfortable. 212 00:12:53,833 --> 00:12:55,473 Oh. 213 00:12:57,333 --> 00:13:00,673 I was expecting, you know... hangings. 214 00:13:00,700 --> 00:13:02,000 Hangings? 215 00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:05,533 Tie-dyed wall hangings. 216 00:13:05,567 --> 00:13:07,467 Wind chimes. The smell of patchouli. 217 00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:09,530 Oh, I see. Like a mystic. 218 00:13:11,200 --> 00:13:13,330 You're not gonna have me doing Elvis, are you? 219 00:13:13,367 --> 00:13:15,727 No, no. Nothing like that. 220 00:13:15,767 --> 00:13:18,667 Cos that's the thing, isn't it? You know. 221 00:13:18,700 --> 00:13:21,300 Someone says the word "fish and chips" 222 00:13:21,333 --> 00:13:24,173 and I am compelled to sing and dance like Elvis. 223 00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:25,670 I suppose so. 224 00:13:27,567 --> 00:13:30,767 - Could you do that? - I'm not a stage hypnotist. 225 00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:33,030 - Can I call you Lance? - Please do. 226 00:13:33,067 --> 00:13:37,167 Great. So...the only way this can work 227 00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:41,400 is if you are completely comfortable and relaxed. 228 00:13:49,767 --> 00:13:50,767 Thank you. 229 00:13:54,233 --> 00:13:56,603 Sit back... 230 00:13:56,633 --> 00:14:00,733 Success depends on you being able to... 231 00:14:00,767 --> 00:14:02,267 completely switch off. 232 00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:04,300 Trust my voice. 233 00:14:04,333 --> 00:14:06,333 And let it carry you away. 234 00:14:06,367 --> 00:14:09,597 I suppose it would be difficult if you had an annoying accent 235 00:14:09,633 --> 00:14:11,073 or a squeaky voice. 236 00:14:12,667 --> 00:14:15,397 Try and put those thoughts out of your mind for a while. 237 00:14:16,433 --> 00:14:20,033 Try to empty your mind. 238 00:14:20,067 --> 00:14:23,327 I will do exactly as you say! 239 00:14:23,367 --> 00:14:25,827 Well done. Just close your eyes. 240 00:14:25,867 --> 00:14:29,167 And listen to the sound of my voice. 241 00:14:29,200 --> 00:14:32,170 - Listening. - No need to tell me that. 242 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:33,500 Just listen. 243 00:14:37,267 --> 00:14:39,627 - Got it. - You don't have to say a thing. 244 00:14:39,667 --> 00:14:43,167 Oh. But I thought you were waiting for a reply. 245 00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:44,470 - No. - Cos you hesitated. 246 00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:47,670 I might do that but you don't need to say anything or worry. 247 00:14:47,700 --> 00:14:51,770 Just relax...and listen. 248 00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:14,100 So I want you to imagine that you are lying on soft, warm sand 249 00:15:14,133 --> 00:15:15,773 on a beach. 250 00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:19,200 And it is a beautiful summer's day. 251 00:15:19,233 --> 00:15:21,603 And the sun is on your face. 252 00:15:21,633 --> 00:15:24,373 You've not got a care in the world 253 00:15:24,400 --> 00:15:27,570 or anything to do. 254 00:15:27,600 --> 00:15:31,800 - You can enjoy the sun all day. - Sorry. Sorry. 255 00:15:31,833 --> 00:15:33,703 Sorry, I um... 256 00:15:33,733 --> 00:15:35,573 I'm very sensitive to the sun. 257 00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:38,100 I burn very easily. 258 00:15:38,133 --> 00:15:41,533 I wouldn't just sunbathe. Um... 259 00:15:41,567 --> 00:15:43,667 Is carpet the same as sand? 260 00:15:43,700 --> 00:15:46,100 Could I lie in my flat? 261 00:15:46,133 --> 00:15:48,303 Yes. 262 00:15:48,333 --> 00:15:51,403 So you are lying on the carpet... 263 00:15:52,500 --> 00:15:54,500 - ..in your flat. - Hm. 264 00:15:54,533 --> 00:15:58,703 You are very comfortable and warm. Just right. 265 00:15:58,733 --> 00:16:02,573 And you can feel yourself sinking into the carpet. 266 00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:06,430 Sinking down through the carpet, 267 00:16:06,467 --> 00:16:12,127 down, down...and the carpet... 268 00:16:12,167 --> 00:16:13,667 No, no. The problem is... 269 00:16:13,700 --> 00:16:17,400 - You live on the first floor? - On the first floor. Exactly. 270 00:16:17,433 --> 00:16:20,273 So I'm sinking down now into Mrs Morris's flat. 271 00:16:20,300 --> 00:16:21,830 She's gonna be terrified. 272 00:16:21,867 --> 00:16:24,427 It works best on a beach, you can just keep on sinking. 273 00:16:24,467 --> 00:16:28,227 Er...have you got one of those sunshades? 274 00:16:28,267 --> 00:16:31,997 Maybe I could sit under one of those big umbrellas. 275 00:16:33,100 --> 00:16:34,400 Yes, do that. 276 00:16:35,833 --> 00:16:38,503 Right, here we go. Back on the beach. 277 00:16:38,533 --> 00:16:40,473 Carry on. 278 00:16:42,333 --> 00:16:44,173 Carry on-ez-vous. 279 00:16:55,433 --> 00:16:57,433 You were very quick. 280 00:16:57,467 --> 00:16:59,267 I was out like a light, yeah. 281 00:16:59,300 --> 00:17:01,470 - Like that. Spark-o. - Really? 282 00:17:01,500 --> 00:17:04,570 Yeah. I feel different. 283 00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:06,830 Like I don't suffer from sea-sickness any more. 284 00:17:06,867 --> 00:17:08,797 Why did she have her head in her hands? 285 00:17:08,833 --> 00:17:10,833 Did she? 286 00:17:10,867 --> 00:17:13,197 Oh, I think she had a migraine coming on. 287 00:17:14,333 --> 00:17:16,173 Can children get migraines? 288 00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:17,600 She wasn't that young. 289 00:17:17,633 --> 00:17:19,703 She didn't know who Yuri Geller was. 290 00:17:19,733 --> 00:17:22,133 Why were you talking about Yuri Geller? 291 00:17:22,167 --> 00:17:24,567 I was talking about fraudsters in general. 292 00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:28,070 Not her. I was just saying there must be some out there. 293 00:17:28,100 --> 00:17:30,100 But, no, yeah. 294 00:17:30,133 --> 00:17:32,073 I think it's done some good. 295 00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:36,470 What's this? 296 00:17:36,500 --> 00:17:38,800 That's for being brave. 297 00:17:38,833 --> 00:17:42,073 Aw, cheers. 298 00:17:42,100 --> 00:17:44,200 Well, better get off to the scout hut. 299 00:17:44,233 --> 00:17:46,433 Wanna stay tomorrow night, see if it worked? 300 00:17:46,467 --> 00:17:49,697 - Yeah. Go on, then. - We can get a takeaway. 301 00:17:49,733 --> 00:17:53,033 - Treat you to fish and chips. - Thank you very much. 302 00:18:01,867 --> 00:18:03,827 Very nice. 303 00:18:03,867 --> 00:18:08,097 House of Constantine, circa 224-330AD. 304 00:18:08,133 --> 00:18:11,673 - That's what I said. - And this one is third century, 305 00:18:11,700 --> 00:18:13,700 possibly Claudius II. 306 00:18:13,733 --> 00:18:16,333 - I said that as well. - All this from the same field? 307 00:18:16,367 --> 00:18:19,697 There's something good going on down there, Terry. We're close. 308 00:18:22,367 --> 00:18:24,767 What's Russell doing? Russell? 309 00:18:27,167 --> 00:18:28,467 Russ! 310 00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:32,327 - What you doing? - I'm on my new app. 311 00:18:32,367 --> 00:18:35,327 - Your what? - It's my new app. On my phone. 312 00:18:35,367 --> 00:18:38,167 It's a metal-detecting app. It's great. 313 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:41,400 You can go on different historical sites to detect. 314 00:18:41,433 --> 00:18:43,503 I'm currently on Hadrian's Wall. 315 00:18:43,533 --> 00:18:46,733 Well, now I've seen everything. 316 00:18:46,767 --> 00:18:49,627 Here we go. Good signal, 12.5. 317 00:18:58,667 --> 00:19:00,597 It's deep. 318 00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:06,530 Ahh. 319 00:19:06,567 --> 00:19:08,597 Roman centurion's helmet. 320 00:19:08,633 --> 00:19:10,573 Good condition. 321 00:19:12,200 --> 00:19:13,800 I'm keeping it. 322 00:19:20,700 --> 00:19:23,530 So did Andy tell you who's been snooping around? 323 00:19:23,567 --> 00:19:26,097 - Who? - Simon and Garfunkel. 324 00:19:26,133 --> 00:19:27,273 The Antiqui-searchers? 325 00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:30,700 Didn't they change their name to something ridiculous? 326 00:19:30,733 --> 00:19:33,773 The Dirt Sharks. 327 00:19:38,333 --> 00:19:41,803 Right, well. There you go, then. 328 00:19:41,833 --> 00:19:43,833 It's decided. 329 00:19:43,867 --> 00:19:46,297 We are no longer the Dirt Sharks. 330 00:19:46,333 --> 00:19:47,773 What are we? 331 00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:49,230 Terra Firma. 332 00:19:49,267 --> 00:19:51,097 Yes! 333 00:19:51,133 --> 00:19:53,773 But we're spelling "terra" the proper Latin way. 334 00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:55,800 Not the way you want to spell it. 335 00:19:55,833 --> 00:19:57,833 It's scarier my way. 336 00:19:57,867 --> 00:20:00,467 Right, then. New name, new start. 337 00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:03,170 This year, I am determined, will be the year 338 00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:06,300 we are finally accepted onto a proper organised rally. 339 00:20:06,333 --> 00:20:09,803 And when we are, I want us to be prepared. 340 00:20:09,833 --> 00:20:14,333 - I wanna see the Dirt Sharks... - Terra Firma. 341 00:20:14,367 --> 00:20:18,427 I want Terra Firma to get the best finds in every category. 342 00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:20,697 Gavin, what are you gonna find? 343 00:20:24,433 --> 00:20:26,433 James I, hammered groat. 344 00:20:26,467 --> 00:20:29,297 - Is it real? - I think so. I got it on eBay. 345 00:20:29,333 --> 00:20:31,033 How deep will it be? 346 00:20:31,067 --> 00:20:32,367 Four, five inches. 347 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,270 - Reading? - 53. 348 00:20:34,300 --> 00:20:37,270 - A bit scratchy. - Nice. 349 00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:38,770 Michael? 350 00:20:44,300 --> 00:20:46,030 Be realistic. 351 00:20:46,067 --> 00:20:49,397 So I said, "If that turns out to be the case, 352 00:20:49,433 --> 00:20:53,503 I will change my name by deed poll 353 00:20:53,533 --> 00:20:55,433 to Belinda Carlisle." 354 00:21:01,067 --> 00:21:02,497 What a wonderful story! 355 00:21:02,533 --> 00:21:05,673 True as I'm sitting here now. 356 00:21:05,700 --> 00:21:08,600 That restores your faith in humanity, doesn't it? 357 00:21:10,367 --> 00:21:12,327 Another cup of tea, Belinda? 358 00:21:15,133 --> 00:21:16,673 There she goes. 359 00:21:16,700 --> 00:21:19,030 You know... 360 00:21:19,067 --> 00:21:21,567 She's got the timing of Ken Dodd, that one. 361 00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:23,530 I'll give you that one, Sheila! 362 00:21:25,467 --> 00:21:27,127 We have a laugh, don't we? 363 00:21:42,300 --> 00:21:44,470 You idiot! 364 00:21:44,500 --> 00:21:46,500 How could you get it so wrong? 365 00:21:46,533 --> 00:21:49,103 - I just thought... - What? 366 00:21:50,067 --> 00:21:51,097 It doesn't matter. 367 00:21:53,700 --> 00:21:56,270 Why don't you think before you open your mouth? 368 00:21:56,300 --> 00:21:57,730 Knobhead. 369 00:22:02,267 --> 00:22:05,527 Well...we've had a very busy week. 370 00:22:07,500 --> 00:22:09,630 After a typically infuriating encounter 371 00:22:09,667 --> 00:22:12,567 with those two goons from the DMDC, 372 00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:16,130 Paul and I decided to drop in on their landowner. 373 00:22:16,167 --> 00:22:18,227 - See if we couldn't... - Butter him up. 374 00:22:18,267 --> 00:22:21,497 ..curry favour, I was going to say. 375 00:22:24,833 --> 00:22:26,673 And the information he gave us was... 376 00:22:26,700 --> 00:22:29,000 - Weapons-grade. - Can you stop interrupting? 377 00:22:31,167 --> 00:22:33,827 Turns out the church farm has been acquired by 378 00:22:33,867 --> 00:22:36,027 a solar energy company. 379 00:22:36,067 --> 00:22:39,197 They're due to start converting the land in five weeks. 380 00:22:39,233 --> 00:22:41,073 So did he give you permission? 381 00:22:41,100 --> 00:22:43,030 He didn't, no. 382 00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:50,000 But Photon Harvest Solar Electricity did. 383 00:22:51,267 --> 00:22:53,097 Paul's idea. 384 00:22:53,133 --> 00:22:55,233 Cut out the middle man. Go straight to the top. 385 00:22:55,267 --> 00:22:57,567 Offer them a service they can't live without. 386 00:22:57,600 --> 00:22:58,730 What service? 387 00:22:58,767 --> 00:23:00,767 Obstruction clearance. 388 00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:03,030 Farm machinery, unexploded bombs. 389 00:23:03,067 --> 00:23:06,567 - That was my idea. - I just said it was your idea. 390 00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:09,500 I gave you credit about two seconds ago. 391 00:23:09,533 --> 00:23:11,473 You don't have to repeat it. 392 00:23:13,633 --> 00:23:16,503 Well, it was when I mentioned unexploded bombs 393 00:23:16,533 --> 00:23:18,633 and what happened to that idiot Terry Seymour 394 00:23:18,667 --> 00:23:23,267 a couple of years ago, that their ears pricked right up. 395 00:23:23,300 --> 00:23:26,330 And the permission... ladies and gentlemen... 396 00:23:27,667 --> 00:23:28,797 - ..is... - ..ours. 397 00:23:28,833 --> 00:23:30,433 Oh, God! 398 00:23:41,633 --> 00:23:43,203 Are you the metal detectors? 399 00:23:43,233 --> 00:23:45,803 Are we the metal detectors? 400 00:23:45,833 --> 00:23:47,833 The bloke I spoke to on the phone. 401 00:23:47,867 --> 00:23:49,627 No. 402 00:23:49,667 --> 00:23:51,797 - Oh, right. We got some. - Some what? 403 00:23:51,833 --> 00:23:54,603 We got some metal detectors to do this so we don't need you. 404 00:23:55,867 --> 00:23:57,797 Sorry, wait. What? 405 00:23:57,833 --> 00:24:01,033 We got five weeks till this farm's converted. 406 00:24:01,067 --> 00:24:03,067 Five weeks till the panels go up. 407 00:24:03,100 --> 00:24:05,430 We need somebody to get rid of the obstructions. 408 00:24:05,467 --> 00:24:07,597 And you've got your own detectorists? 409 00:24:07,633 --> 00:24:10,503 They're freelance. They wrote to us. We've employed them. 410 00:24:10,533 --> 00:24:13,133 - What are they called? - A company called... 411 00:24:13,167 --> 00:24:14,267 Terra Firma. 412 00:24:14,300 --> 00:24:17,570 - Never heard of 'em. - When are they showing up? 413 00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:20,770 Thought they were gonna be here. I was supposed to meet them. 414 00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:22,170 I thought you were them. 415 00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:31,670 You are kidding me. 416 00:24:40,567 --> 00:24:42,167 Are you the metal detectors? 417 00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:43,600 Indeed we are. 418 00:24:43,633 --> 00:24:46,533 Terra Firma at your service, sir. 419 00:24:46,567 --> 00:24:48,467 I can see from our friends' faces 420 00:24:48,500 --> 00:24:52,670 - they've heard the good news. - Sneaky bloody trick. 421 00:24:52,700 --> 00:24:54,700 Quite the opposite, in fact. 422 00:24:54,733 --> 00:24:57,373 We've been through all the correct channels, 423 00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:59,800 as can be proved with this paper trail. 424 00:24:59,833 --> 00:25:02,373 We've been on this farm five years. 425 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,030 Can't you all do it? I don't care if they do it as well. 426 00:25:05,067 --> 00:25:07,067 No, no, no, no, no, no. 427 00:25:07,100 --> 00:25:11,230 You gave us the permission as stated in this email. 428 00:25:11,267 --> 00:25:13,227 We have the permission of the landowner. 429 00:25:13,267 --> 00:25:15,067 Over-ruled, actually. 430 00:25:15,100 --> 00:25:17,530 Oh, come on. There's only four of you and 300 acres. 431 00:25:17,567 --> 00:25:19,027 Why can't you work together? 432 00:25:19,067 --> 00:25:22,497 We gave them the chance to share and they turned it down. 433 00:25:22,533 --> 00:25:24,133 Why should we? We got here first. 434 00:25:24,167 --> 00:25:26,067 We got here first. Why should we share it? 435 00:25:26,100 --> 00:25:27,500 - You should share. - Shut up. 436 00:25:27,533 --> 00:25:30,703 - You shut up. - It's like a school playground! 437 00:25:30,733 --> 00:25:32,203 How old are you lot? 438 00:25:32,233 --> 00:25:34,573 We'll do it first come, first served. 439 00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:37,270 Whoever gets here first gets the choice of their field. 440 00:25:37,300 --> 00:25:39,030 Not fair. 441 00:25:39,067 --> 00:25:41,067 You can all sling your hooks! I don't care! 442 00:25:41,100 --> 00:25:43,800 Hang on, hang on, wait. I can go along with that. 443 00:25:43,833 --> 00:25:45,703 First come, first served. 444 00:25:52,300 --> 00:25:54,600 OK. 445 00:25:54,633 --> 00:25:56,473 See? We don't have to behave like kids. 446 00:25:56,500 --> 00:25:59,630 Yeah, but after we've chosen the field, 447 00:25:59,667 --> 00:26:03,567 there's an invisible force field all the way around 448 00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:05,230 and you cannot enter it. 449 00:26:05,267 --> 00:26:07,367 What if we haven't got our detectors? 450 00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:08,800 It's an impenetrable force field. 451 00:26:08,833 --> 00:26:11,603 Right. Now shake hands. 452 00:26:11,633 --> 00:26:13,733 - No way. - Never. 453 00:26:14,833 --> 00:26:16,573 Childish. 454 00:26:18,233 --> 00:26:20,673 I know you are. What am I? 455 00:26:26,067 --> 00:26:27,397 Huh? 456 00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:41,600 Feeling any better? 457 00:27:41,633 --> 00:27:43,633 Think so. 458 00:27:43,667 --> 00:27:45,597 Did it all come up? 459 00:27:46,667 --> 00:27:48,597 Mm. 460 00:27:49,767 --> 00:27:51,697 Saw some fish eating it. 461 00:27:52,633 --> 00:27:54,073 Did you? 462 00:27:54,833 --> 00:27:56,273 Yeah.