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Sync and corrections by explosiveskull
www.addic7ed.com
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Dude, this house is insane.
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Oh, it's fucking nuts, right?
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- Fucking nuts.
- Yeah.
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Wow.
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Wow.
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Gordon! Peanut!
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Oh, there they are.
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Oh, there's a Gordon and Peanut!
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There's a Gordon
and a little Peanut. Hi.
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Mickey, this is Gordon. This is Peanut.
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Peanut, Gordon, this is Mickey.
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- Oh. Hi, Gordon and Peanut.
- Give me kisses.
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Aw, who are these goofballs?
Who are these goofballs?
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Gus, this house is incredible.
Just leave the dogs. Show me around.
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Okay.
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Well, the elevator works.
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Yep. This is nuts.
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Wow.
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- This kitchen.
- It's insane.
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What's that?
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- Uh, a fridge.
- No.
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Old-timey fridge.
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- Really?
- Yeah.
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- Oh, my God!
- Ah!
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This is all original.
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- Wow.
- Nice. Yeah.
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- Oh, my God.
- Mmm-hmm.
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- This bedroom's amazing.
- Yeah.
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What's in here?
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Oh, my God.
She has, like, a million pairs of shoes.
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Gus, how many shoes can I steal?
33
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So being a kid actor
can get you a house like this?
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Mmm, no.
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He just comes from a really rich family
and invested well.
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Oh. So like...
everyone I knew in New York.
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Mmm-hmm. Now he's married,
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so, uh, when he goes out of town,
he just... just asks me to house-sit.
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- Mmm.
- Yeah.
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This is gonna be such an awesome way
to watch Witchita tomorrow, you know?
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Mmm.
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Are you flipping out?
You must be flipping out.
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- I am.
- Yeah?
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I think my parents are more.
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My mom drug out all
the Halloween decorations from the garage
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and put 'em at the house
so they'd have witch stuff everywhere.
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Aw.
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Wanna fuck outside?
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Oh, my God.
50
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If Shaun posts one more photo
of her baby wearing sunglasses,
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I am unfollowing her for life.
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Oh, my God.
I love hearing you shit-talk your friends.
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Why?
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'Cause it makes me know you, like,
really trust me, you know?
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Don't flatter yourself.
I'll shit-talk to anyone who will listen.
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Oh.
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- Okay, I know this is gross, but...
- Ooh.
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Can I please pop a zit on your back?
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Uh, ugh...
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All right,
if you think it's gross, I won't.
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No, no. I don't think it's gross.
I think, like, I'm gross.
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I'm just, like, self-conscious
about my zits and stuff, so I feel...
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Are you kidding me? Popping pimples
is my favorite thing in life.
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- Okay.
- Thank you.
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- Go for it.
- Thank you so much.
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- Oh, my God.
- Okay.
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One... two...
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- Did you get it?
- Yes.
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- Look at it.
- Mmm-mmm.
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- Thank you for letting me be gross.
- You're welcome.
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You know, I can talk shit with anyone,
but popping someone's pimples...
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I should probably
go walk those dogs.
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Who else lives around here?
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Any celebrities that haven't
been dead for 500 years?
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Uh... I think I heard
Matthew Perry lives around here.
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- Cool.
- Maybe. Yeah.
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So that could mean that
that is Matthew Perry's personal trainer.
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Oh, yeah.
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Oh, you know Matthew Perry
is in cooldown mode right now.
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All right.
Ooh, I think Gordon has to poopie.
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Oh, okay.
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It's kind of weird
seeing you smoke out here, you know?
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'Cause this neighborhood's so fancy.
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Feels like it's like
one big non-smoking section, you know?
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Okay.
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What?
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I don't know,
that just seemed a little, uh... judge-y.
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Do you hate that I smoke?
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- Why? Do you want me to hate it?
- Do I want you to hate it?
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Like, if it'd help you to quit,
knowing that I hated it or something.
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I mean, are you...
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Are you trying to quit or is that not...
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I just noticed you've been, like,
smoking more than you did before.
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I've been smoking more
because I'm in AA and SLAA,
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and I cannot give up anything else,
like, for the rest of my life.
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No. Totally, totally, totally.
I get it. Yeah.
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I wasn't trying to shame you
or whatever, you know.
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I know you're rockin' it.
I'm super proud of you.
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Okay.
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That a boy, Gordon.
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Hmm.
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I put the dogs in their special room,
so they're good for the night.
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Cool. Hmm. Lookin' at these photo albums,
104
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I feel like I know these people on, like,
a psychological level.
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Oh, yeah? Do tell.
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He hates his parents.
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- That's obvious.
- Mmm-hmm.
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They got married too young,
but they've got a great sex life.
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I think that's 100% right.
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Are you wearing new pajamas?
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Uh, kind of. I got 'em from that drawer.
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You're wearing Linda's pajamas?
113
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Well, we're in Linda's house,
sleeping in Linda's bed.
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Might as well wear Linda's pajamas, right?
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Yeah, cool with me.
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How much do you think
a house like this is worth?
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Ooh, I don't know.
I'm bad with that stuff.
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- Maybe, like, $200.
- Hmm.
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I think, like, five to seven million.
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- Probably. That's crazy, huh?
- Yeah.
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I've always wanted
to live in a house like this.
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It's the dream, to be honest.
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- Is that lame?
- No, it's not lame to have a dream.
124
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Dreams are good.
125
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Dreams make people, you know,
work hard to earn the things they want.
126
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I don't wanna earn it.
I just wanna have it.
127
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Yeah, but how would you buy it?
128
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Marry some rich dude.
129
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Some guy that's about to die
and gives me all his money.
130
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Don't you think that's a little...
anti-feminist?
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Shouldn't a woman want to go out
in the world and...
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not depend on some other guy for...
133
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Are you explaining feminism
to me right now? Is that what's happening?
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Never mind.
I'm not gonna say anything more.
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I just want to have a relaxed life.
Always have.
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Live in a big house, read some books
and have a cat. Is that so wrong?
137
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No. It's perfect.
138
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That's a perfect dream. I... I love that.
139
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But, honestly, how...
how often do you think that happens?
140
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Like, really happens?
141
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- Women marrying old men for money?
- Yeah.
142
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Every 15 seconds.
143
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:02,607
No.
144
00:08:02,690 --> 00:08:05,568
Mmm. You think that Jerry Hall
married Rupert Murdoch
145
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because she loves him?
146
00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:08,821
Yeah, I believe she loves him.
147
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He's living on borrowed time
and she knows it.
148
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- He's probably a cool guy.
- Uh-huh.
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He's, like, smart, charming, witty.
150
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:21,835
Okay, you're making
a pro-Rupert Murdoch argument right now.
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I'm just saying we should
give more credit to these wives.
152
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Like, did you see those pictures of them
on the wedding day?
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They looked very happy.
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I'd rather see the photos of them
on the wedding night.
155
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- That's when the work starts.
- Mnh-mnh.
156
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Jesus Lord. Choking down that dick?
Please, she earned every cent.
157
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You know...
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if Rupert Murdoch didn't exist,
there wouldn't be The Simpsons.
159
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I'm willing to live with that.
160
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Wow.
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- Do you mind if I watch TV?
- No, it'll help me fall asleep.
162
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Fucking awesome. Okay.
All right. Here we go.
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Fuck.
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Mickey!
165
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Hey, Mickey, can you come here?
166
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Sure!
167
00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:41,373
- What's up?
- Hey, uh, did you let one of the dogs in?
168
00:09:41,456 --> 00:09:44,251
Oh, yeah. I was bored,
so I let Peanut in to keep me company.
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Mmm, okay.
170
00:09:47,129 --> 00:09:50,798
'Cause you know we're supposed to
keep an eye on the dogs if they're inside.
171
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Remember, that's, like, one of the...
The rules?
172
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- Yeah.
- Yeah.
173
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Well, um, Peanut pooped in the house.
174
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- I'm sorry. Where?
- Here.
175
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Okay, I'll clean it up.
It won't leave a stain.
176
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Not so much a stain
that I'm worried about, it's more, like...
177
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When a dog poops,
it's marking its territory.
178
00:10:09,192 --> 00:10:11,403
So now every time he poops,
he's gonna wanna poop here...
179
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:13,571
Okay, can you not say poop?
Just say shit or...
180
00:10:13,655 --> 00:10:17,492
Okay. Poop. Shit. Fuck. Turds.
Whatever, okay? He took a shit,
181
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and it wouldn't have happened
if you had looked and paid attention.
182
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- I'm sorry.
- I'll clean it up.
183
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:27,835
Just can you take the dogs outside
or something, please? For me.
184
00:10:27,919 --> 00:10:30,588
Yeah, I have to smoke anyway.
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Peanut! Gordon!
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Okay.
187
00:11:01,369 --> 00:11:02,412
- Hi!
- Hey!
188
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- Syd!
- Mickey!
189
00:11:05,623 --> 00:11:06,833
- Hey.
- Oh!
190
00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,835
- You remember Gus.
- Hi, Gus.
191
00:11:08,918 --> 00:11:11,838
- This is Jeff, my husband.
- Hi, welcome!
192
00:11:11,921 --> 00:11:13,590
Hey.
193
00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:16,426
- Hi, welcome.
- Oh, hello.
194
00:11:17,134 --> 00:11:18,886
Ooh, sorry.
195
00:11:18,970 --> 00:11:21,598
Oh, God.
Are we the first ones here?
196
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:23,015
Please tell me we're not that lame.
197
00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:24,684
- You're the first ones here.
- Fuck.
198
00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:26,353
Hey, come on. Don't worry.
199
00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:29,481
You don't think I've been
in this position before? It's no problem.
200
00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:32,275
The babysitter showed up, so we're like,
"Hey, let's get outta here."
201
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:35,278
And then, you know, Syd and I don't do
a lot of stuff at night,
202
00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:37,322
so we got excited.
203
00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:38,615
We bolted out of the fucking house.
204
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:39,907
Yeah.
205
00:11:39,991 --> 00:11:41,701
Hey, Syd, come check out the backyard.
206
00:11:41,784 --> 00:11:43,160
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
207
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:47,707
- Wow, this is cool.
- It is, isn't it?
208
00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:49,083
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah.
209
00:11:50,877 --> 00:11:55,340
So I slam on my brakes going, like,
60 miles an hour.
210
00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:58,468
Otis is in the backseat
barfing up frozen yogurt...
211
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:02,930
- Oh, my God.
- and I just miss rear-ending this guy.
212
00:12:03,014 --> 00:12:05,683
Ugh, I almost hit an office chair
on the freeway once,
213
00:12:05,767 --> 00:12:07,644
and it traumatized me for, like, a year.
214
00:12:09,646 --> 00:12:12,148
Are you gonna get in trouble with Jeff
if he sees you smoking that?
215
00:12:12,231 --> 00:12:14,776
No, he'll be cool with it.
He usually is when we go out.
216
00:12:14,859 --> 00:12:17,362
That way I can't judge him
for whatever he does.
217
00:12:17,445 --> 00:12:18,905
- Yeah.
- What about Gus? He cool with it?
218
00:12:19,489 --> 00:12:21,949
Oh, he asked me yesterday
if I ever thought about quitting.
219
00:12:22,033 --> 00:12:24,536
- You didn't like that.
- I mean, I like Gus.
220
00:12:24,619 --> 00:12:28,290
I like him, but sometimes I feel like
I'm his fixer-upper or something.
221
00:12:28,373 --> 00:12:29,916
- Yeah?
- I don't know.
222
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,210
We went to lunch with my dad
the other week,
223
00:12:32,294 --> 00:12:33,711
and he was really nice and supportive,
224
00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:39,091
but it also felt like he was getting off
on watching me be damaged, too, you know?
225
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:44,347
Or, just devil's advocating here,
maybe he really is supportive and caring.
226
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:49,311
But he's kinda condescending about it,
you know? It's the way he does it.
227
00:12:49,977 --> 00:12:54,316
And I know if I ever messed up,
he would be so disappointed in me.
228
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:57,569
It's too much pressure.
229
00:12:57,652 --> 00:13:00,196
I wouldn't worry about it.
I think you're just feeling this way
230
00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:02,824
because you guys have been cooped up
in this house together.
231
00:13:02,907 --> 00:13:05,577
If he goes, "I'm proud of you,"
one more time,
232
00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,328
I'm gonna slit his fucking throat.
233
00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:10,707
So, you guys know Mickey?
234
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,166
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
235
00:13:12,250 --> 00:13:13,334
Great. How do you know her?
236
00:13:14,043 --> 00:13:16,295
- I work with her at the radio station.
- Oh, cool.
237
00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:18,465
How about you?
238
00:13:18,548 --> 00:13:20,299
Yeah, I work at the radio station, too.
239
00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:21,676
Oh, so you're coworkers?
240
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:24,762
He doesn't work
at the radio station.
241
00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:27,014
- Nah, I was just being an asshole.
- Oh.
242
00:13:27,098 --> 00:13:29,351
I don't even fucking know this guy.
243
00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:31,603
- I don't know him either, no.
- Are you guys fucking with me?
244
00:13:31,686 --> 00:13:32,687
No.
245
00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:34,397
- Oh, wow.
- What's your name again?
246
00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:36,358
- Len.
- Truman. Nice to meet you.
247
00:13:36,441 --> 00:13:37,484
Nice to meet you.
248
00:13:37,567 --> 00:13:39,569
So what about you?
Uh, you've been dating anybody?
249
00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:42,864
Nah. Do you know what's crazy, dude?
I've been hooking up with an ex.
250
00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:45,700
Ever since Witchita ended,
I need something stable in my life.
251
00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:48,995
- Oh, totally. I hear that. Yeah.
- Yeah, so what about you?
252
00:13:49,078 --> 00:13:51,288
Is Mickey staying with you this whole time
you've been in this dump?
253
00:13:51,373 --> 00:13:54,792
Yeah, she was here, uh, last night
and then tonight and tomorrow night.
254
00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:56,002
- Three nights?
- Mmm-hmm.
255
00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:58,463
Three nights? That's what happens
when you're not working.
256
00:13:58,546 --> 00:14:00,089
You fill up your free time
with your dick.
257
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:04,301
No, it's okay, 'cause, you know,
I'm going out of town pretty soon
258
00:14:04,386 --> 00:14:06,095
- to do that movie with Arya.
- Uh-huh.
259
00:14:06,178 --> 00:14:08,556
So, just trying to get in
some quality time before I go.
260
00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:09,641
Slow down, slow down.
261
00:14:09,724 --> 00:14:11,393
How long have you been talking
to this girl?
262
00:14:12,143 --> 00:14:14,646
I don't know, like, a month...
A little over a month.
263
00:14:14,729 --> 00:14:16,564
Yeah, dude, a little over a month
264
00:14:16,648 --> 00:14:18,357
but you're treating it
like it's been two years.
265
00:14:18,441 --> 00:14:20,317
Relax, bro. Relax.
266
00:14:20,402 --> 00:14:24,531
I'm pretty sure Mickey's a nice girl,
but she seems a bit... complex.
267
00:14:24,614 --> 00:14:27,659
See, that's what I like about her,
that she is complex, you know?
268
00:14:27,742 --> 00:14:30,327
It's like every day,
I learn a little bit more about her,
269
00:14:30,412 --> 00:14:34,123
and I think I start to understand her,
then she does something that just, like...
270
00:14:35,207 --> 00:14:38,628
I don't know. I love it.
She's like a puzzle, and I love puzzles.
271
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:41,506
I like a nice 24-piece puzzle.
272
00:14:41,589 --> 00:14:44,216
- Mickey's like a 500-piece puzzle.
- Well...
273
00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:47,387
Anyway, I'm glad you're here.
274
00:14:47,470 --> 00:14:49,472
We get to celebrate the end
of Witchita together, huh?
275
00:14:49,556 --> 00:14:52,517
- Yes, yes, yes. RIP Witchita, man.
- Yes.
276
00:14:53,518 --> 00:14:55,770
Hey, buddy,
I'm so sorry about that tattoo.
277
00:14:55,853 --> 00:14:58,147
Dude, I'm not there yet.
278
00:15:13,788 --> 00:15:15,164
So you two are Mickey's friends?
279
00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:17,459
Uh, yeah.
I've known Mickey since forever.
280
00:15:17,542 --> 00:15:19,126
Cool.
281
00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:20,962
What about you guys?
Are you Mickey's friends?
282
00:15:21,045 --> 00:15:23,214
- We're Gus' friends.
- I'm his best friend.
283
00:15:23,297 --> 00:15:26,634
I only ask because
I never know who Mickey's friends are.
284
00:15:26,718 --> 00:15:28,553
Seems like
she's always making new friends.
285
00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:30,137
Why do you say that like it's a bad thing?
286
00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:33,099
Well, I think people get to know
Mickey's bullshit,
287
00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:35,643
- and she has to make new friends.
- Where is she, anyways?
288
00:15:35,727 --> 00:15:37,311
Like, I feel like I never see her.
289
00:15:37,395 --> 00:15:40,982
Let me guess.
Upstairs, fucking some random dude.
290
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:43,359
Okay, shut up.
You're done talking now.
291
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:44,694
- I'm done talking now.
- Yeah.
292
00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:48,114
Like, I've been in two fights
in my lifetime.
293
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:50,241
What about you, man?
294
00:15:50,324 --> 00:15:53,369
Me? None. Uh, never. I've never... fight.
295
00:15:54,286 --> 00:15:55,287
What about you, Stretch?
296
00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:59,291
- About a dozen.
- What?
297
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:02,419
When I see injustice, I fight.
298
00:16:02,504 --> 00:16:04,714
- Did you say your name was Alexis?
- Yeah.
299
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,966
You look super familiar.
Are you on Tinder?
300
00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:08,134
Maybe.
301
00:16:08,217 --> 00:16:09,927
Jesus. What the hell am I doing here?
302
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:13,598
Da-da-da-dah. Ooh!
303
00:16:13,681 --> 00:16:16,308
Oh, you look good.
304
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:19,061
Thank you.
This Linda woman has good taste.
305
00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:20,062
Yeah.
306
00:16:20,730 --> 00:16:24,025
So, hey, um,
did you invite Randy tonight or...
307
00:16:24,108 --> 00:16:28,029
- Uh, no. I assumed you'd tell him.
- Okay, gotcha.
308
00:16:28,112 --> 00:16:32,450
- Did you? Did you tell him?
- Uh, no. But that's okay.
309
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,201
Okay.
310
00:16:35,369 --> 00:16:37,705
So do you think
Gus could have maybe invited him?
311
00:16:38,330 --> 00:16:42,794
- I don't know. Why? What's going on?
- Nothing. It's just...
312
00:16:42,877 --> 00:16:45,755
I guess things have been a little bit
strained between Randy and I lately,
313
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:48,633
so... if he doesn't come tonight,
that's okay.
314
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:51,302
- Okay.
- But I love all these jewels.
315
00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:56,849
I feel so regal, like the kind of woman
who's probably great at dinner parties,
316
00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:58,643
but is a bit racist.
317
00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:01,646
- What time is it?
- Oh, just after 8:30.
318
00:17:01,729 --> 00:17:04,399
Oh, I gotta get everybody
gathered around the TV for Witchita.
319
00:17:04,982 --> 00:17:08,069
You ready for some Witchita,
motherfuckers?
320
00:17:12,364 --> 00:17:16,452
Yeah, and keep it going
for the man of the hour, Gus Cruikshank!
321
00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:20,122
Thank you. Thank you.
322
00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:23,709
All right, DVR-ed
for zero commercial interruption.
323
00:17:23,793 --> 00:17:24,669
Five...
324
00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:28,548
Four, three, two, one...
325
00:17:43,354 --> 00:17:45,772
It really is a beautiful steeple,
Reverend.
326
00:17:45,857 --> 00:17:48,526
Hmm. Yes.
327
00:17:50,361 --> 00:17:53,280
- "Story by"!
- Yeah. Wow, wow, wow.
328
00:17:53,364 --> 00:17:56,367
You know,
you should join me here this evening.
329
00:17:56,450 --> 00:17:58,702
Oh, uh, of course, Reverend.
330
00:17:58,786 --> 00:18:03,457
Yeah, Heidi. Go hook up with Pastor Lewis
and stay off of Gus' dick.
331
00:18:03,540 --> 00:18:06,753
Ha. Very funny, very funny.
332
00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:09,380
Yeah, Heidi.
Why don't you stay off Gus' dick?
333
00:18:10,547 --> 00:18:14,260
Oh, boy.
334
00:18:14,343 --> 00:18:15,970
It's just that my mother died...
335
00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:18,681
- Why'd you say that?
- It's a joke.
336
00:18:18,765 --> 00:18:21,643
Yeah. No, that's... that's funny.
337
00:18:21,726 --> 00:18:23,770
Is she a witch? Gus.
338
00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:26,480
- What?
- Who is witches? Like, is...
339
00:18:26,563 --> 00:18:28,691
- She is? She's a witch?
- Yeah, they're all...
340
00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:30,567
- Most of them are witches.
- Oh, okay.
341
00:18:30,652 --> 00:18:32,237
Witchita.
342
00:18:32,319 --> 00:18:34,363
- Do you get it? Yeah.
- Yeah.
343
00:18:34,447 --> 00:18:35,948
Hello? Mickey?
344
00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:38,868
- Oh, my God, Andy. Sorry.
- Echo!
345
00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:41,370
All right. Sorry. Hi!
346
00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:43,580
- Hi, how are you?
- Hi. Good.
347
00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:46,500
- Sorry, you guys.
- Uh, this is my friend, Andy.
348
00:18:47,418 --> 00:18:49,128
It's Andy Dick, obviously.
349
00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:51,756
- Hi.
- Uh, spoiler alert,
350
00:18:51,839 --> 00:18:55,009
Colonel Mustard is giving it
to Miss Scarlet up in the conservatory
351
00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:57,094
with the candlestick right now.
352
00:18:57,929 --> 00:19:00,014
- What's going on?
- Listen, can I talk to you?
353
00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:01,557
- Yeah.
- In private.
354
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,267
- What's up?
- AA stuff.
355
00:19:03,350 --> 00:19:05,311
Yep. Yeah.
356
00:19:05,394 --> 00:19:06,896
Sorry. Enjoy.
357
00:19:07,814 --> 00:19:11,818
Um... I just gotta go talk to Andy
about some AA stuff,
358
00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:15,612
so do you want to pause the episode
or is that, like, annoying for people?
359
00:19:15,697 --> 00:19:18,032
Uh, yeah,
I guess we'll just keep it running
360
00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:19,909
but come back as soon as you can.
361
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:21,202
- Yeah.
- Okay.
362
00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:24,746
I bet you can see
the whole town from up here.
363
00:19:24,831 --> 00:19:27,542
Oh, look, there's Jarvis. Jarvis!
364
00:19:28,125 --> 00:19:30,837
I had the, um, initial audition...
365
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:33,047
- Uh-huh.
- and I fuckin' killed it.
366
00:19:33,130 --> 00:19:36,467
I really did.
Even I was like, "Fuck," you know.
367
00:19:36,550 --> 00:19:41,055
Because I've been saying no to all...
About five auditions all year.
368
00:19:41,138 --> 00:19:43,140
- Because they're triggers for me.
- Yeah.
369
00:19:43,224 --> 00:19:46,102
They're triggers.
I... I used to drink...
370
00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:49,480
before I would audition and, um...
371
00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:52,649
When's the last time
you went in sober to an audition?
372
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:54,610
Nineteen...
373
00:19:56,445 --> 00:19:57,488
Never.
374
00:19:57,571 --> 00:20:00,532
I just feel like
death follows me wherever I go.
375
00:20:00,616 --> 00:20:03,244
All of these murders in town,
it's giving me a fright.
376
00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:04,703
My dear. My dear.
377
00:20:04,787 --> 00:20:05,871
Now is the time...
378
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:09,709
to hold our friends very close.
379
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:14,881
You know, you never really know
who to trust these days.
380
00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:24,223
What the fuck, Bertie?
381
00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:28,727
Why are you texting me, "I'm outside"?
Just come inside. We're watching Witchita.
382
00:20:28,811 --> 00:20:31,647
I'm not going in because you obviously
don't want me to be in there.
383
00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:33,900
No, I just... I'm sorry, I forgot.
384
00:20:33,983 --> 00:20:36,861
Gus texted me, "Why aren't you here?"
I had no idea what he was talking about.
385
00:20:36,944 --> 00:20:39,280
I had to ask him, like some sort of loser.
386
00:20:39,363 --> 00:20:43,450
Like, my girlfriend and all my friends
are watching TV in a big mansion,
387
00:20:43,534 --> 00:20:45,202
and I'm not invited to come in?
388
00:20:45,787 --> 00:20:48,831
It just made me feel really sad.
389
00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:51,250
And I feel like
you're being weird to me and...
390
00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:54,545
No, I'm not. It's just...
Just come inside.
391
00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:56,839
I... I missed you.
392
00:20:56,923 --> 00:20:58,340
Aw...
393
00:20:58,424 --> 00:20:59,926
I missed you, too.
394
00:21:02,428 --> 00:21:04,305
Do you think they noticed I wasn't here?
395
00:21:04,388 --> 00:21:06,515
Should we say I had,
like, a flat tire or something?
396
00:21:06,598 --> 00:21:08,267
No. No one cares. It's fine.
397
00:21:09,143 --> 00:21:12,438
I mean, now, he's, like,
so into my sobriety
398
00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:13,981
that it's kind of borderline creepy...
399
00:21:14,065 --> 00:21:16,525
- Oh, God, I hate that.
- Right? He's, like, trying to, like...
400
00:21:16,608 --> 00:21:18,152
Well, welcome to my world.
401
00:21:18,235 --> 00:21:19,695
- Well...
- The whole world's into my sobriety.
402
00:21:19,779 --> 00:21:21,280
I know.
I can't even imagine what that feels like.
403
00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:22,448
Can't stand it.
404
00:21:22,531 --> 00:21:24,658
So now he's, like, keeping track of me.
405
00:21:24,741 --> 00:21:26,702
I feel like he's got a chart
in his apartment
406
00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:29,205
where it's like,
"number of meetings per week."
407
00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:31,415
I'm... I'm barely exaggerating.
408
00:21:31,999 --> 00:21:33,751
Oh, yeah, but you know what?
409
00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:36,337
God, I wish I had something like that.
410
00:21:39,631 --> 00:21:41,092
- No, Andy.
- What?
411
00:21:41,175 --> 00:21:45,346
- No, we're never gonna make out.
- Don't... Please don't say "never."
412
00:21:45,429 --> 00:21:49,683
Oh, no, no, Detective.
I've never seen anything like it either.
413
00:21:49,766 --> 00:21:52,143
Hmm. Uh, let's see, well, Wednesdays?
414
00:21:52,228 --> 00:21:54,271
Wednesdays, we minister to the poor...
415
00:21:54,355 --> 00:21:56,816
- Are you farting?
- No.
416
00:21:56,899 --> 00:22:00,486
Yes, you are.
I can smell it, Jeff. It's disgusting.
417
00:22:00,569 --> 00:22:02,738
Well, if you know it's me, why do you ask?
418
00:22:04,907 --> 00:22:07,452
Her memory's
a little spotty these days
419
00:22:07,534 --> 00:22:09,370
due to her advanced age and all.
420
00:22:09,453 --> 00:22:13,374
But, uh, I'm sure she'll vouch for me
and verify my whereabouts.
421
00:22:13,457 --> 00:22:15,626
Hey. Hey, Len.
422
00:22:16,377 --> 00:22:17,920
Can you take the glass of wine
off the floor?
423
00:22:18,003 --> 00:22:20,840
- I just... I don't want it to spill.
- Yeah, no problem.
424
00:22:22,258 --> 00:22:24,051
They really are stunning at night.
425
00:22:24,135 --> 00:22:25,427
Okay, thanks.
426
00:22:25,511 --> 00:22:28,180
Yes, it is lovely, my dear.
427
00:22:29,348 --> 00:22:33,019
Say good night... forever!
428
00:22:34,186 --> 00:22:36,397
Oh, my God. That lady fell.
429
00:22:37,064 --> 00:22:39,358
Someone get help!
430
00:22:43,905 --> 00:22:44,906
Fuck.
431
00:22:45,489 --> 00:22:48,784
Um, Gus, sorry.
I think one of the dogs ate chocolate.
432
00:22:48,867 --> 00:22:50,161
They're acting all sick.
433
00:22:50,244 --> 00:22:51,954
They're barfing. They're gonna barf more.
434
00:22:52,038 --> 00:22:54,665
Are you serious? Did somebody
open the door to the dog room?
435
00:22:54,748 --> 00:22:56,208
God...
436
00:22:56,292 --> 00:22:57,834
- Sorry.
- Fuck!
437
00:22:57,919 --> 00:23:01,005
- Hey, it's okay, buddy. We'll clean up.
- It's okay. Uh...
438
00:23:01,088 --> 00:23:02,381
I'm gonna take care of this.
439
00:23:03,257 --> 00:23:06,093
- Where they at? Is it Gordon?
- I don't know. They look the same.
440
00:23:06,677 --> 00:23:09,805
Do we have to keep watching?
'Cause it's... I can't.
441
00:23:09,888 --> 00:23:12,099
We have to go, actually,
'cause we have a sitter.
442
00:23:12,183 --> 00:23:13,935
Okay, guys.
443
00:23:14,018 --> 00:23:15,436
Nice to see you. Bye.
444
00:23:15,519 --> 00:23:17,604
Bye. So good to see you guys.
445
00:23:24,736 --> 00:23:27,281
Okay. Call me tomorrow.
446
00:23:27,364 --> 00:23:30,617
Okay. And... and thanks.
Probably call you tonight.
447
00:23:30,701 --> 00:23:32,703
- Okay. Bye.
- Okay. Thank you.
448
00:23:34,496 --> 00:23:36,082
Oh, did everybody leave?
449
00:23:36,707 --> 00:23:38,834
Yeah.
Well, you were up there a long time.
450
00:23:38,917 --> 00:23:40,752
- So...
- Oh. Yeah.
451
00:23:41,503 --> 00:23:45,591
Gordon ate some chocolate, but I helped
him puke it up, so he's okay now.
452
00:23:45,674 --> 00:23:46,925
All right.
453
00:23:47,009 --> 00:23:50,512
So, why are you cleaning now?
Just leave it for tomorrow.
454
00:23:50,596 --> 00:23:54,933
- Because I want to clean up now.
- Wow, you're so anal.
455
00:23:55,017 --> 00:23:58,354
Mickey, if I wanna clean up,
I can clean up. All right?
456
00:23:59,313 --> 00:24:02,816
God forbid I have respect
for other people's stuff, right?
457
00:24:04,443 --> 00:24:05,902
Wow.
458
00:24:05,987 --> 00:24:07,654
Is this what you're like?
459
00:24:08,822 --> 00:24:10,366
If we lived together,
would you be like this?
460
00:24:10,449 --> 00:24:13,244
Like, get all wound up
when things are messy?
461
00:24:13,327 --> 00:24:15,663
Why are you picking a fight
with me right now?
462
00:24:16,163 --> 00:24:18,457
- You should be the one who's apologizing.
- For what?
463
00:24:18,540 --> 00:24:19,916
For missing my episode!
464
00:24:20,001 --> 00:24:21,627
Like, ten minutes in, you just stand up
465
00:24:21,710 --> 00:24:24,130
and, like, walk out of the room
and don't see any of it.
466
00:24:24,213 --> 00:24:25,589
Yeah, 'cause I had to talk to Andy.
467
00:24:25,672 --> 00:24:29,051
Okay, first of all...
you're friends with Andy Dick?
468
00:24:29,135 --> 00:24:32,513
What the fuck?
And then, second of all...
469
00:24:32,596 --> 00:24:35,932
I guess Andy Dick is more important
than my episode of Witchita, huh?
470
00:24:36,017 --> 00:24:38,602
He had to talk to me
about some deeply personal shit
471
00:24:38,685 --> 00:24:40,646
and he needed to talk
to someone in the program
472
00:24:40,729 --> 00:24:42,939
and that is way more important
473
00:24:43,024 --> 00:24:44,816
than your stupid
little episode of television
474
00:24:44,900 --> 00:24:47,111
that you just want
everybody to suck your dick about.
475
00:24:47,194 --> 00:24:49,071
Wow. You are jealous.
476
00:24:49,155 --> 00:24:50,947
It's like you couldn't even
be there for me
477
00:24:51,032 --> 00:24:52,324
when something good was happening.
478
00:24:52,408 --> 00:24:55,411
What was good?
Are you talking about Witchita?
479
00:24:55,494 --> 00:24:58,205
- That show fucking sucks.
- Okay, don't say that.
480
00:24:58,289 --> 00:24:59,665
You say that all the time!
481
00:24:59,748 --> 00:25:02,501
Yeah, I can say it, but you can't.
Just support me!
482
00:25:02,584 --> 00:25:05,671
Oh, so lie to you now?
Okay, it was great.
483
00:25:05,754 --> 00:25:07,881
All right, yeah.
Whatever, Mickey. Fine.
484
00:25:07,964 --> 00:25:11,218
I'm an asshole because I wanted
you to watch my show with me, okay?
485
00:25:12,178 --> 00:25:16,682
Ugh, just... Okay, just...
Please just stop monitoring me, okay?
486
00:25:16,765 --> 00:25:18,642
- What?
- You monitor me all the time!
487
00:25:18,725 --> 00:25:20,602
I do not monitor you.
488
00:25:20,686 --> 00:25:22,938
You suffocate me.
I have no personal space.
489
00:25:23,021 --> 00:25:25,607
You're, like, keeping tallies
on me all the time.
490
00:25:25,691 --> 00:25:28,485
Like, four meetings this week,
three meetings last week,
491
00:25:28,569 --> 00:25:30,446
and you're fucking, like,
checking up on me.
492
00:25:30,529 --> 00:25:33,865
You know what?
Why don't you go find some rich old guy,
493
00:25:33,949 --> 00:25:35,951
and you can be his kept woman...
494
00:25:36,034 --> 00:25:38,495
and he can fucking ignore you,
which is what you want.
495
00:25:38,579 --> 00:25:39,996
You don't want anybody caring about you,
496
00:25:40,081 --> 00:25:42,249
you don't want anybody
looking out for you.
497
00:25:42,333 --> 00:25:44,168
You wanted to be treated
like dirt and be ignored,
498
00:25:44,251 --> 00:25:45,877
'cause that's what you're familiar with.
499
00:25:45,961 --> 00:25:48,547
And then somebody comes along
and treats you kindly,
500
00:25:48,630 --> 00:25:50,882
and you don't know
how to fucking process it!
501
00:25:50,966 --> 00:25:54,095
Wow. That's nice.
That's real fucking rude of you.
502
00:25:54,178 --> 00:25:56,805
- Where are my cigarettes? Where...
- Why would I know?
503
00:25:56,888 --> 00:26:00,184
- Did you fucking hide my cigarettes?
- Oh, my God.
504
00:26:00,267 --> 00:26:04,062
Yes, Mickey, I took your cigarettes
and I hid them from you. You got me.
505
00:26:04,146 --> 00:26:06,315
You act like it's a joke,
but I wouldn't put it past you.
506
00:26:06,398 --> 00:26:07,608
I'm sure that's something
you'd love to do.
507
00:26:07,691 --> 00:26:09,610
You're accusing me of hiding cigarettes?
508
00:26:09,693 --> 00:26:12,738
- You keep tabs on me...
- That's so fucking bonkers!
509
00:26:12,821 --> 00:26:15,365
You wanna fucking monitor me?
Fine, watch this. Monitor this.
510
00:26:16,658 --> 00:26:18,369
Jesus Christ!
511
00:27:00,452 --> 00:27:01,828
Hey, Gus.
512
00:27:01,912 --> 00:27:03,914
Oh. Hey.
513
00:27:03,997 --> 00:27:04,998
Hey, what's up, man?
514
00:27:05,081 --> 00:27:07,876
Uh, I hope you don't mind,
I crashed here last night.
515
00:27:07,959 --> 00:27:10,171
Oh! That's okay. It's cool.
516
00:27:10,254 --> 00:27:12,173
I'm getting ready
to get out of here right now.
517
00:27:12,256 --> 00:27:13,507
- Good morning.
- Good...
518
00:27:14,466 --> 00:27:16,635
- Hey.
- Hey, how's everything?
519
00:27:16,718 --> 00:27:17,719
Can I get a ride?
520
00:27:17,803 --> 00:27:20,264
- Where you... Where you headed?
- Westside.
521
00:27:20,764 --> 00:27:22,599
Damn, I live in North Hollywood.
522
00:27:23,767 --> 00:27:26,144
- So?
- You know what, I...
523
00:27:26,228 --> 00:27:27,854
We'll figure this out outside, man.
524
00:27:27,938 --> 00:27:30,482
Crazy party once again.
Uh, I'll see you, bro.
525
00:27:30,566 --> 00:27:31,692
All right. Bye.
526
00:27:31,775 --> 00:27:34,320
- Great Witchita.
- Thank you. Bye-bye.
527
00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:54,089
- Hey.
- Hey.
528
00:27:56,467 --> 00:27:59,553
- What's up? Are you taking off?
- Yeah.
529
00:27:59,636 --> 00:28:01,263
I figured, let you take care of the house
530
00:28:01,347 --> 00:28:03,098
- for the last night.
- Oh.
531
00:28:04,099 --> 00:28:05,351
Okay.
532
00:28:07,436 --> 00:28:11,440
- Hey, I'm sorry about last night.
- No, I'm sorry.
533
00:28:11,523 --> 00:28:15,026
We were getting along
and then I started acting out and...
534
00:28:15,110 --> 00:28:17,571
I don't know.
535
00:28:17,654 --> 00:28:19,406
Well, let's leave together. Huh?
536
00:28:19,490 --> 00:28:21,658
I'll just pack my stuff up
and we can take off and...
537
00:28:21,742 --> 00:28:23,034
Stay here.
538
00:28:23,118 --> 00:28:26,204
We can have lunch tomorrow.
Enjoy the house, you know.
539
00:28:26,288 --> 00:28:30,084
Watch a movie on the big TV.
Avatar or something.
540
00:28:31,167 --> 00:28:32,544
Okay.
541
00:28:32,628 --> 00:28:35,964
So, uh, yeah, we'll just...
We'll talk tomorrow.
542
00:28:36,048 --> 00:28:36,965
Yeah.
543
00:28:38,300 --> 00:28:39,510
Okay.
544
00:28:41,845 --> 00:28:43,680
Um...
545
00:28:43,764 --> 00:28:47,226
I'm sorry about the crystal bowl.
I'll buy a new one.
546
00:28:48,393 --> 00:28:50,979
Yeah. I looked online and...
547
00:28:51,772 --> 00:28:55,025
- one of those costs $2,000.
- Oh.
548
00:28:55,942 --> 00:28:58,445
Okay. In that case...
549
00:28:58,529 --> 00:29:00,739
maybe we could pretend
like nothing happened
550
00:29:00,822 --> 00:29:02,491
and see if anyone notices?
551
00:29:03,158 --> 00:29:05,577
That's my whole philosophy
in life.
552
00:29:06,662 --> 00:29:08,414
- Okay.
- Okay.
553
00:29:09,373 --> 00:29:12,042
Right.
554
00:30:28,285 --> 00:30:33,285
Sync and corrections by explosiveskull
www.addic7ed.com