1
00:00:02,170 --> 00:00:05,131
(female dispatcher)
Unit 14 clear.
2
00:00:05,214 --> 00:00:07,133
What can we get you,
officer?
3
00:00:07,216 --> 00:00:09,969
Well, a bazoom-burger
with a side of nip dips
4
00:00:10,052 --> 00:00:11,345
does sound delicious,
5
00:00:11,429 --> 00:00:14,348
But I'm afraid I must inform you
of something much less savory--
6
00:00:14,432 --> 00:00:15,224
a broken taillight.
7
00:00:15,308 --> 00:00:18,936
We broke it
to get your attention.
8
00:00:19,020 --> 00:00:20,521
[laughs]
Oh, right.
9
00:00:20,605 --> 00:00:23,274
Duh. I'm coming in.
10
00:00:23,357 --> 00:00:25,276
[zipper unzips]
[women moan]
11
00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:26,360
- Slap that tomato.
- Okay.
12
00:00:26,444 --> 00:00:28,821
Oh, put that tomato
all over it.
13
00:00:28,905 --> 00:00:31,449
(woman)
Oh, the mayonnaise jar
is open.
14
00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:32,992
I'll just fast-forward
through the 32 minutes
15
00:00:33,075 --> 00:00:33,951
of disgusting
condiment play.
16
00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:36,245
No, no!
That's the best part!
17
00:00:36,329 --> 00:00:38,039
(woman)
Oh, tap that ass.
Oh, tap that ass.
18
00:00:38,122 --> 00:00:40,291
(Dazzle)
Okay, trying to get
my footing here.
19
00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:42,543
This floor is slick
with mayonnaise--
20
00:00:42,627 --> 00:00:45,463
Whoa!
Oh, whoa, whoa!
21
00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:46,839
(woman)
Is it moving?
22
00:00:46,923 --> 00:00:48,090
[women scream]
23
00:00:53,429 --> 00:00:57,141
Um...
24
00:00:57,225 --> 00:00:58,434
Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap,
crap, crap, crap, crap!
25
00:00:58,518 --> 00:01:02,313
[techno music]
26
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:10,404
♪ ♪
27
00:01:15,535 --> 00:01:16,953
(Dazzle)
I hope nobody sees this tape.
28
00:01:17,036 --> 00:01:18,871
Oh, God, I hope
I'm not watching it right now.
29
00:01:18,955 --> 00:01:21,624
Pizzaz is probably
staring at me
30
00:01:21,707 --> 00:01:23,584
with that stupid angry
glare thing she does.
31
00:01:23,668 --> 00:01:26,128
Dazzle, if you're watching this,
hang in there, buddy!
32
00:01:26,212 --> 00:01:26,671
Don't let
that crazy bitch--
33
00:01:26,754 --> 00:01:29,215
Yes, bravo, Dazzle.
34
00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:32,677
Slutburger was a beloved
Moonbeam City institution.
35
00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:34,136
People are furious!
36
00:01:34,220 --> 00:01:37,390
Especially those goddamn
highfalutin bastards
37
00:01:37,473 --> 00:01:38,766
at the Laser Society!
38
00:01:38,850 --> 00:01:40,560
Slutburger was
supposed to cater
39
00:01:40,643 --> 00:01:42,311
their goddamn Laser Ball
tonight!
40
00:01:42,395 --> 00:01:44,730
Hey, I wasn't going
to the Laser Ball to eat,
41
00:01:44,814 --> 00:01:45,523
if you know
what I'm saying.
42
00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:46,899
You were going
to head up security.
43
00:01:46,983 --> 00:01:48,901
And now,
you're not going at all.
44
00:01:48,985 --> 00:01:51,237
I can't miss
the Laser Ball!
45
00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:53,906
It's one-stop shopping
for primo high-class tail!
46
00:01:53,990 --> 00:01:55,825
Congratulations, Rad,
the job is yours.
47
00:01:55,908 --> 00:01:57,451
No can do
and yes can don't.
48
00:01:57,535 --> 00:02:01,414
I'm already attending the
Laser Ball as an invited guest.
49
00:02:01,497 --> 00:02:03,749
After all, I am part
of the Moonbeam City elite.
50
00:02:03,833 --> 00:02:05,418
Wait a minute,
you're rich?
51
00:02:05,501 --> 00:02:07,670
Uh, yeah.
52
00:02:07,753 --> 00:02:09,213
How else could I afford
the biggest mansion
53
00:02:09,297 --> 00:02:10,882
in Diamond Crest Estates?
54
00:02:10,965 --> 00:02:13,217
Or this subscription
to Wealth Enthusiast magazine,
55
00:02:13,301 --> 00:02:15,511
which confirms my residence
in Diamond Crest Estates?
56
00:02:15,595 --> 00:02:16,470
I'll do it!
It'll be a great chance
57
00:02:16,554 --> 00:02:18,097
to try out my proprietary
checklist system.
58
00:02:18,180 --> 00:02:20,933
It uses
color-coded Roman numerals!
59
00:02:21,017 --> 00:02:22,602
I'm trying to think
of someone,
60
00:02:22,685 --> 00:02:24,812
anyone, to run security
at this ball.
61
00:02:24,896 --> 00:02:25,980
Hello?
62
00:02:26,063 --> 00:02:27,189
Seriously,
can I do it?
63
00:02:27,273 --> 00:02:29,442
Back off, girlie!
I'm in charge here!
64
00:02:29,525 --> 00:02:30,484
I'm not a threat to you!
65
00:02:30,568 --> 00:02:31,527
Whoa!
66
00:02:31,611 --> 00:02:34,488
Looks like someone's Aunt Flo
is back in town.
67
00:02:34,572 --> 00:02:36,991
She seems to visit just about
every month actually,
68
00:02:37,074 --> 00:02:40,202
except for a few months after
last year's Cop Con weekend.
69
00:02:40,286 --> 00:02:41,495
Maybe she was sick.
70
00:02:41,579 --> 00:02:42,455
- That's enough!
[all gasp]
71
00:02:42,538 --> 00:02:44,332
What? Ow!
72
00:02:44,415 --> 00:02:48,044
Chrysalis, you can be
in charge of security.
73
00:02:48,127 --> 00:02:50,588
I have to go now.
74
00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:52,340
What is happening to me?
75
00:02:54,926 --> 00:02:58,512
(Chrysalis)
Dr. and Mrs. Rosenblaze. Check!
76
00:02:58,596 --> 00:03:00,014
The system works!
77
00:03:00,097 --> 00:03:02,975
This is going better
than I ever could have...
78
00:03:03,059 --> 00:03:05,311
Well, hello, little girl.
79
00:03:05,394 --> 00:03:07,480
I'm Ethel Vanderzazz,
80
00:03:07,563 --> 00:03:10,149
V-a-n--
81
00:03:10,232 --> 00:03:11,859
I know it's you, Dazzle.
82
00:03:11,943 --> 00:03:13,152
Damn it, Mrs. Vanderzazz!
83
00:03:13,235 --> 00:03:15,988
I told you,
you were wobbling too much!
84
00:03:16,072 --> 00:03:17,740
- Now, get out of here.
- [screams]
85
00:03:17,823 --> 00:03:19,617
Sorry, Dazzle,
I can't let you in.
86
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:20,743
This is unbelievable!
87
00:03:20,826 --> 00:03:21,994
No human being has ever
been mistreated so badly
88
00:03:22,078 --> 00:03:24,413
in all of recorded
human history.
89
00:03:24,497 --> 00:03:26,832
Don't ruin this for me!
Just go!
90
00:03:26,916 --> 00:03:27,667
[grunts]
91
00:03:27,750 --> 00:03:29,669
Dazzle!
92
00:03:29,752 --> 00:03:31,545
[grunts]
93
00:03:31,629 --> 00:03:33,589
[classical music]
94
00:03:33,673 --> 00:03:40,346
♪ ♪
95
00:03:40,429 --> 00:03:41,681
Like a poor man!
96
00:03:41,764 --> 00:03:43,933
[laughter]
97
00:03:44,016 --> 00:03:45,267
[laughs]
98
00:03:45,351 --> 00:03:47,812
I can't even imagine
being poor!
99
00:03:47,895 --> 00:03:49,939
I pay someone
to imagine it for me.
100
00:03:50,022 --> 00:03:52,191
Rad Cunningham.
I'm very rich.
101
00:03:52,274 --> 00:03:55,528
I don't believe I've seen you
around, Cunningham.
102
00:03:55,611 --> 00:03:57,905
Are you a member
of Sparklewood Country Club?
103
00:03:57,989 --> 00:03:59,407
Well, I was
until they started letting in
104
00:03:59,490 --> 00:04:01,367
those filthy Quasarites.
105
00:04:01,450 --> 00:04:03,577
Now I spend most
of my free time on my yacht.
106
00:04:03,661 --> 00:04:07,373
Why, we're all avid seamen!
What kind of boat do you own?
107
00:04:07,456 --> 00:04:09,375
Uh...
108
00:04:09,458 --> 00:04:09,875
[chuckles]
109
00:04:09,959 --> 00:04:12,128
It's a, you know,
110
00:04:12,211 --> 00:04:13,713
a Wave--
111
00:04:13,796 --> 00:04:15,381
WaveTech? Which model?
112
00:04:15,464 --> 00:04:17,883
Uh, a nine--
113
00:04:17,967 --> 00:04:18,884
Nine Thousand?
114
00:04:18,968 --> 00:04:22,722
Yes, exactly.
A Wave, uh...
115
00:04:22,805 --> 00:04:23,347
Tech.
116
00:04:23,431 --> 00:04:26,183
Tech Nine Thousand. Yes.
117
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:27,560
[laughter]
118
00:04:27,643 --> 00:04:30,229
Us WaveTech Nine Thousand owners
are a tight bunch.
119
00:04:30,312 --> 00:04:32,314
A fraternity of sorts.
120
00:04:32,398 --> 00:04:33,899
Yes.
That's why they teach you
121
00:04:33,983 --> 00:04:36,152
the WaveTech Nine Thousand
Fight Song at the dealership.
122
00:04:36,235 --> 00:04:39,780
Lead us in a round,
won't you, Rad?
123
00:04:41,657 --> 00:04:43,159
Uh...
124
00:04:43,242 --> 00:04:49,999
♪ I love
my WaveTech Nine Thousand ♪
125
00:04:50,082 --> 00:04:51,834
♪ Splashing ♪
126
00:04:51,917 --> 00:04:53,753
♪ All, uh ♪
127
00:04:53,836 --> 00:04:56,505
♪ It's so awesome
with the wind in your hair ♪
128
00:04:56,589 --> 00:04:59,592
♪ The, uh, um... ♪
129
00:04:59,675 --> 00:05:03,929
[Dazzle humming]
130
00:05:04,013 --> 00:05:06,599
Whoa.
131
00:05:06,682 --> 00:05:09,643
Pardon me, ma'am.
Dazzle Novak, MCPD.
132
00:05:09,727 --> 00:05:12,605
Am I under arrest, or is this
just how you meet women?
133
00:05:12,688 --> 00:05:15,066
Either way,
I admire your tenacity.
134
00:05:15,149 --> 00:05:17,651
Panache Miller.
I'm chairwoman of this event.
135
00:05:17,735 --> 00:05:19,862
Nice to meet you,
Madam Chairwoman.
136
00:05:19,945 --> 00:05:21,405
Is this your chair?
137
00:05:21,489 --> 00:05:22,114
[both laugh]
138
00:05:22,198 --> 00:05:24,283
Why are we still not boning?
139
00:05:24,366 --> 00:05:27,328
[electronic music]
140
00:05:27,411 --> 00:05:34,126
♪ ♪
141
00:05:34,210 --> 00:05:35,961
[Panache moaning]
- Okay, okay.
142
00:05:36,045 --> 00:05:36,962
(Dazzle)
Okay!
143
00:05:37,046 --> 00:05:38,714
(Panache)
Oh!
144
00:05:38,798 --> 00:05:40,800
[sighs]
145
00:05:40,883 --> 00:05:42,051
The sex was very good,
Dazzle.
146
00:05:42,134 --> 00:05:46,305
I'll have some more tomorrow.
Say, at the police station?
147
00:05:46,389 --> 00:05:47,807
I'll meet you there
at noon.
148
00:05:47,890 --> 00:05:48,349
Yes, ma'am!
149
00:05:48,432 --> 00:05:52,645
♪ Of my WaveTech ♪
150
00:05:52,728 --> 00:05:55,147
♪ Nine Hun--uh, Thousand ♪
151
00:05:55,231 --> 00:05:58,609
- Oh.
- Ah, very good!
152
00:05:58,692 --> 00:05:59,819
Why, the only way
to cap this night
153
00:05:59,902 --> 00:06:03,823
would be a ride on the very
boat about which you sing!
154
00:06:03,906 --> 00:06:05,658
Ha-Ha!
155
00:06:05,741 --> 00:06:07,701
I would love to,
but, I, uh...
156
00:06:07,785 --> 00:06:08,744
[glass shatters]
157
00:06:08,828 --> 00:06:10,788
I cut my arm,
and the loss of blood is--
158
00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:13,791
Ahh.
159
00:06:13,874 --> 00:06:16,001
(Dazzle)
Everyone, please look over here
160
00:06:16,085 --> 00:06:18,045
and be jealous of my incredibly
rich, inventive-in-the-sack
161
00:06:18,129 --> 00:06:20,881
new girlfriend, Panache.
162
00:06:20,965 --> 00:06:23,467
Oh, and--and this is
a dangerous predator I caught
163
00:06:23,551 --> 00:06:24,844
living in the walls
of a preschool.
164
00:06:24,927 --> 00:06:25,928
Ignore him.
165
00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:30,141
Ah! Panache Miller,
I'd like you to meet,
166
00:06:30,224 --> 00:06:31,517
for the very first time
in your life,
167
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:35,020
my boss Pizzaz...
Miller. Huh.
168
00:06:35,104 --> 00:06:37,022
Why, hello...
169
00:06:37,106 --> 00:06:37,815
little sister.
170
00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:40,860
[ominous music]
171
00:06:40,943 --> 00:06:43,571
♪ ♪
172
00:06:43,654 --> 00:06:44,780
[gasps]
173
00:06:44,864 --> 00:06:47,825
[techno music]
174
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:49,702
♪ ♪
175
00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:52,997
(Dazzle)
So to reiterate,
176
00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:55,332
I've been having sex
with your sister?
177
00:06:55,416 --> 00:06:57,209
I have no sister.
178
00:06:57,293 --> 00:07:00,129
In fact,
I have no four sisters.
179
00:07:00,212 --> 00:07:02,381
Poor, poor,
pitiful Pizzaz.
180
00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:06,385
I, too, had hoped
we'd never see each other again,
181
00:07:06,468 --> 00:07:08,888
but sometimes fate throws
a peanut in your lemonade,
182
00:07:08,971 --> 00:07:09,972
now, don't it?
183
00:07:10,055 --> 00:07:13,642
Pizzaz is an heiress
to the Miller laser fortune?
184
00:07:13,726 --> 00:07:14,727
That's right.
185
00:07:14,810 --> 00:07:17,146
My father is
Commodore Vector Azimuth Miller,
186
00:07:17,229 --> 00:07:20,065
the original laser baron.
187
00:07:20,149 --> 00:07:22,568
Once, Moonbeam City
was a desolate marsh
188
00:07:22,651 --> 00:07:25,196
until Daddy struck laser.
189
00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:27,072
(Vector)
Eureka!
190
00:07:27,156 --> 00:07:29,283
Crude laser.
191
00:07:29,366 --> 00:07:30,326
And it's all mine!
192
00:07:30,409 --> 00:07:32,620
(Pizzaz)
Soon he had wells everywhere,
193
00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:36,081
and the city was awash
in yellow, pink, and blue gold.
194
00:07:36,165 --> 00:07:37,875
He built an empire,
195
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,085
and around it grew
a glittering metropolis.
196
00:07:40,169 --> 00:07:41,462
In his autumn years,
197
00:07:41,545 --> 00:07:42,963
the commodore foolishly
handed the business
198
00:07:43,047 --> 00:07:46,258
to my greedy sisters.
199
00:07:46,342 --> 00:07:47,092
They wasted
our most precious resource
200
00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:49,428
on electronic tag games,
201
00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:51,931
progressive rock concerts,
and corrective eye surgery,
202
00:07:52,014 --> 00:07:55,684
while they lived grotesquely
off the profits.
203
00:07:55,768 --> 00:07:57,895
The lasers, oh, they ran dry,
204
00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:59,730
as did the laser mining jobs.
205
00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:01,607
And now,
thanks to my sisters' avarice,
206
00:08:01,690 --> 00:08:05,819
we're left with the crime-ridden
puddle of stink you see today.
207
00:08:05,903 --> 00:08:07,988
[woman screams]
- It made me sick.
208
00:08:08,072 --> 00:08:11,992
So I walked away, became a cop,
and never looked back.
209
00:08:12,076 --> 00:08:15,246
Very colorful
history lesson, sister.
210
00:08:15,329 --> 00:08:17,248
But the fact is,
you didn't walk away,
211
00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:19,333
you were laughed off
the field.
212
00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:22,962
If you want to talk like
some gin-soaked lasertante,
213
00:08:23,045 --> 00:08:25,714
I suggest you go back
to the swamp you came from.
214
00:08:25,798 --> 00:08:27,299
Oh!
There's the Miller spirit.
215
00:08:27,383 --> 00:08:29,468
I knew it was hiding somewhere
216
00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:31,720
beneath that cheap
Satinique frock.
217
00:08:31,804 --> 00:08:34,139
Wow. Sexually adventurous,
superrich,
218
00:08:34,223 --> 00:08:35,224
bubble butt,
and Pizzaz hates her.
219
00:08:35,307 --> 00:08:38,060
I think she might
be the one.
220
00:08:38,143 --> 00:08:40,813
Oh, by the by, Sister,
Daddy's health has declined
221
00:08:40,896 --> 00:08:43,440
and he's soon to be
cryogenically frozen.
222
00:08:43,524 --> 00:08:45,192
[gasps]
Daddy is sick?
223
00:08:45,276 --> 00:08:46,527
Isn't that sad?
224
00:08:46,610 --> 00:08:47,319
Why didn't anyone
tell me?
225
00:08:47,403 --> 00:08:49,363
Well, we didn't want
to interrupt
226
00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:51,782
your important police work.
227
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:52,741
[chuckles]
228
00:08:52,825 --> 00:08:54,076
Let's go, Dazzle.
229
00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:56,787
We're visiting Daddy
at Irradiance Woods.
230
00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:59,290
Sure thing, but first, I must
process this dangerous predator.
231
00:08:59,373 --> 00:09:00,332
Now, Dazzle!
232
00:09:00,416 --> 00:09:03,168
Okay, I want you to go back
to the preschool,
233
00:09:03,252 --> 00:09:05,254
wait,
come back here at 3:00.
234
00:09:05,337 --> 00:09:08,340
- I said now, Dazzle!
- Coming!
235
00:09:08,424 --> 00:09:11,635
Oh, he's all right,
everyone!
236
00:09:11,719 --> 00:09:13,262
Yes,
just a little blood loss.
237
00:09:13,345 --> 00:09:14,471
Who--who are you?
238
00:09:14,555 --> 00:09:15,597
[all laugh]
239
00:09:15,681 --> 00:09:18,434
He has his famous,
wealthy sense of humor back!
240
00:09:18,517 --> 00:09:22,521
Now we can finally take the ship
ride we've been waiting for.
241
00:09:22,605 --> 00:09:24,481
Ship ride?
242
00:09:24,565 --> 00:09:27,484
This is the only WaveTech
Nine Thousand at the marina,
243
00:09:27,568 --> 00:09:29,320
so it must be yours.
244
00:09:29,403 --> 00:09:32,531
Daddy's Three Princesses,
that's an interesting name.
245
00:09:32,615 --> 00:09:34,408
Do you have three daughters,
Rad?
246
00:09:34,491 --> 00:09:37,536
Uh. Oh, that's what I call
my penis and testicles.
247
00:09:37,619 --> 00:09:38,495
[all chuckle]
248
00:09:38,579 --> 00:09:41,373
Delightfully ribald.
WaveTechers?
249
00:09:41,457 --> 00:09:43,375
Shall we commence
the boarding process?
250
00:09:43,459 --> 00:09:47,796
Oh, sure! Just have to,
uh, gas her up, you know.
251
00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:49,465
Oh, oh, oh, look!
A pelican!
252
00:09:49,548 --> 00:09:51,675
- Oh! Oh, my!
- Ooh.
253
00:09:51,759 --> 00:09:53,010
Majestic.
254
00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:55,387
Ah, now that the pelican
has been seen,
255
00:09:55,471 --> 00:09:56,513
let's continue with--
256
00:09:56,597 --> 00:09:57,222
[gasps]
Good heavens!
257
00:09:57,306 --> 00:10:00,684
Oh, no! My boat!
258
00:10:00,768 --> 00:10:02,770
Yes, indeed! It's being
destroyed as we speak!
259
00:10:02,853 --> 00:10:05,564
Please tell me you didn't
have anything valuable
260
00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:07,191
on the boat, Rad.
261
00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:09,610
[whispers] This is my chance
to keep proving I'm rich.
262
00:10:09,693 --> 00:10:13,614
Yes! My stacks of cash!
And my flawless diamonds!
263
00:10:13,697 --> 00:10:15,366
What else was
on the boat, Rad?
264
00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:18,243
My...superhot wife!
265
00:10:18,327 --> 00:10:19,536
Your wife?
266
00:10:19,620 --> 00:10:22,373
She must have had
tremendous sentimental value!
267
00:10:22,456 --> 00:10:25,584
Uh, her name is...Dorothy.
268
00:10:25,668 --> 00:10:28,545
Oh, Dorothy!
269
00:10:34,176 --> 00:10:37,930
Oh, Daddy.
I came as soon as I heard.
270
00:10:38,013 --> 00:10:43,102
Sweet Pizzaz, your voice is
a sound for sore ears.
271
00:10:43,185 --> 00:10:45,938
The freezification,
it's already begun.
272
00:10:46,021 --> 00:10:47,523
You weren't even
going to tell me?
273
00:10:47,606 --> 00:10:50,109
I'm sorry, my dear.
I couldn't wait any longer.
274
00:10:50,192 --> 00:10:52,778
Your sisters all agree
it's time for me to go.
275
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:55,864
No. No, that's just because
they want your money!
276
00:10:55,948 --> 00:10:58,200
Please don't leave
your fortune to them!
277
00:10:58,283 --> 00:11:01,203
I haven't chosen an heir.
278
00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:04,081
I have six hours
to finalize the will
279
00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:06,834
before my signing arm
is frozen.
280
00:11:06,917 --> 00:11:09,086
Oh, Daddy. Daddy, no!
281
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:12,131
Well, well, well,
282
00:11:12,214 --> 00:11:13,215
I certainly hope
you haven't come back
283
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:16,093
to dip your candle in
the pepper pot, little sister.
284
00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:18,595
Charisma.
285
00:11:18,679 --> 00:11:23,350
She knows better than that,
don't you, missy?
286
00:11:23,434 --> 00:11:25,144
Sophistica!
287
00:11:25,227 --> 00:11:27,438
Why, of course she does.
288
00:11:27,521 --> 00:11:28,981
Hmm?
289
00:11:29,064 --> 00:11:31,024
(Pizzaz)
Accoutrement!
290
00:11:31,108 --> 00:11:32,526
Would you look at this?
291
00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:34,862
All the Miller girls
back together.
292
00:11:34,945 --> 00:11:37,030
Somebody take a Polaroid.
293
00:11:37,114 --> 00:11:39,575
Hey, Pizzaz!
It's me, Dazzle! From work?
294
00:11:39,658 --> 00:11:41,493
Dazzle, we need
some sister time.
295
00:11:41,577 --> 00:11:43,162
Go into the kitchen
and mingle with the husbands.
296
00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:46,832
Yes, ma'am!
297
00:11:46,915 --> 00:11:49,418
Let's move this party
to the Mantel Room.
298
00:11:49,501 --> 00:11:53,589
No!
Not the Mantel Room!
299
00:11:53,672 --> 00:11:56,133
Now, let's get down
to business.
300
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:57,551
Per tradition,
each of us will have a turn
301
00:11:57,634 --> 00:12:00,179
in front
of our respective mantel
302
00:12:00,262 --> 00:12:02,806
to make our case
for the family fortune.
303
00:12:02,890 --> 00:12:04,808
I'll go first.
[clears throat]
304
00:12:04,892 --> 00:12:08,187
Ever since I was a girl,
I have always dreamed--
305
00:12:08,270 --> 00:12:11,857
And my Fabergé cubes,
and my dinosaur boners,
306
00:12:11,940 --> 00:12:16,195
and my collection
of rare blues records and--
307
00:12:16,278 --> 00:12:16,987
(man)
Rare blues records?
308
00:12:17,070 --> 00:12:18,906
Why we're all
veritable buffs!
309
00:12:18,989 --> 00:12:21,575
Which rare blues recordings
do you have?
310
00:12:23,535 --> 00:12:26,205
Old, uh,
Willy Williams,
311
00:12:26,288 --> 00:12:28,749
um, uh...
312
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:31,835
Blind Billy Billson,
313
00:12:31,919 --> 00:12:34,213
and Deaf Johnny Bluesington,
314
00:12:34,296 --> 00:12:36,798
and, uh, Mute Eddie Caldwell,
Little Buddy--
315
00:12:36,882 --> 00:12:39,259
(man)
My boat! My boat!
316
00:12:39,343 --> 00:12:43,514
Sweet Mamma Big Toes
and Deaf Malcolm Shuggs.
317
00:12:46,558 --> 00:12:48,185
Pardon me.
Um, Panache said
318
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:50,896
some presumably really cool
husbands were in here.
319
00:12:50,979 --> 00:12:52,397
Have any of you nerds
seen them?
320
00:12:52,481 --> 00:12:53,732
Oh! You must be
Panache's new toy!
321
00:12:53,815 --> 00:12:58,111
Hello, I'm Mylar,
aka Mr. Accoutrement.
322
00:12:58,195 --> 00:13:00,280
And we are
the Miller husbands!
323
00:13:00,364 --> 00:13:02,282
Play your cards right,
and you could be one of us!
324
00:13:02,366 --> 00:13:03,659
Now grab a seat.
325
00:13:03,742 --> 00:13:04,910
You're just in time
for catalogue shopping!
326
00:13:04,993 --> 00:13:08,747
Well, you certainly seem like
Panache's type.
327
00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:11,583
Let me guess, firefighter?
Prism splitter?
328
00:13:11,667 --> 00:13:12,334
I'm a cop.
What do, uh, you guys do?
329
00:13:12,417 --> 00:13:14,878
[chuckles]
Do?
330
00:13:14,962 --> 00:13:17,589
Oh, honey, us Miller husbands
aren't allowed to have jobs.
331
00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:20,133
We are allowed to have hobbies.
Zinc here is into beekeeping.
332
00:13:20,217 --> 00:13:22,678
[buzzing]
333
00:13:22,761 --> 00:13:24,763
Mute Mutey Also Blind,
uh,
334
00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:26,974
Happy Robert Jones,
Sad Robert Jones.
335
00:13:27,057 --> 00:13:29,268
Oh, I left my daughter's wedding
as soon as I heard.
336
00:13:29,351 --> 00:13:31,436
Is this him?
337
00:13:31,520 --> 00:13:34,439
Rad, this is Zap Mendelson,
executive director
338
00:13:34,523 --> 00:13:37,234
of the Moonbeam City
Bluesological Institute.
339
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:38,986
I have a blues salvage team
standing by.
340
00:13:39,069 --> 00:13:41,822
I just need a complete inventory
of your collection.
341
00:13:41,905 --> 00:13:46,118
Ahh, well,
Blind Dock Bouey man,
342
00:13:46,201 --> 00:13:47,244
Wavy Jack Pierwood--
343
00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:48,287
[sneezes]
344
00:13:48,370 --> 00:13:50,289
Sneezy Sun...
345
00:13:50,372 --> 00:13:51,498
[caws]
346
00:13:51,582 --> 00:13:53,125
- Birdcaw.
- Sneezy Sun Birdcaw.
347
00:13:53,208 --> 00:13:54,960
Yes, I think I've heard of him.
Go on.
348
00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,044
Uh...
349
00:13:56,128 --> 00:13:57,087
Fly Noselander.
350
00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,881
Noselander? That--that's
a Jewish name, isn't it?
351
00:13:59,965 --> 00:14:04,177
Rad, are you saying that
Jews invented the blues?
352
00:14:04,261 --> 00:14:06,722
Uh-huh.
353
00:14:06,805 --> 00:14:09,725
(Sophistica)
Why, my organization,
Luncheons for Causes,
354
00:14:09,808 --> 00:14:12,853
has raised over $200,000
for cause-related luncheons.
355
00:14:12,936 --> 00:14:13,812
Oh, please.
356
00:14:13,895 --> 00:14:15,355
Those luncheons
are a total sham,
357
00:14:15,439 --> 00:14:16,815
unlike
my Gala Awareness Charity,
358
00:14:16,898 --> 00:14:19,985
which raises awareness
of charitable galas.
359
00:14:20,068 --> 00:14:22,279
[yawns]
This has grown tedious.
360
00:14:22,362 --> 00:14:26,033
Why don't we all gang up
on Pizzaz for a while?
361
00:14:26,116 --> 00:14:27,326
You little slut.
362
00:14:27,409 --> 00:14:28,785
What a filthy little bug
of a woman.
363
00:14:28,869 --> 00:14:29,953
You will get nothing!
364
00:14:30,037 --> 00:14:31,496
- Who do you think you are?
- Nothing!
365
00:14:31,580 --> 00:14:32,414
No!
366
00:14:32,497 --> 00:14:35,542
These bitches are vicious!
367
00:14:39,755 --> 00:14:43,592
[women arguing in background]
368
00:14:45,552 --> 00:14:47,596
[cat purrs]
369
00:14:47,679 --> 00:14:48,639
[meows]
370
00:14:48,722 --> 00:14:51,516
Okay, I am gonna go see
if they're almost done.
371
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:53,602
You can't just go in there!
372
00:14:53,685 --> 00:14:56,063
That would be suicide!
373
00:14:56,146 --> 00:14:58,815
You don't want to see how
the ladies get when they argue.
374
00:14:58,899 --> 00:15:00,359
Well, you don't know Pizzaz.
375
00:15:00,442 --> 00:15:01,401
She's probably juggling
your wives' heads right now.
376
00:15:01,485 --> 00:15:03,528
I'll go rescue them.
377
00:15:03,612 --> 00:15:05,197
Beware the ladies!
378
00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,657
All right, Pizzaz.
379
00:15:06,740 --> 00:15:07,240
Spit out their bones
before you--
380
00:15:07,324 --> 00:15:09,743
[gasps]
381
00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:13,163
Go away, Dazzle! No, I don't
want you to see me like this!
382
00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:15,791
Get back in the kitchen!
383
00:15:15,874 --> 00:15:18,418
Sit on the ground and cross
your legs, you little slut.
384
00:15:18,502 --> 00:15:19,211
He's alive!
385
00:15:19,294 --> 00:15:21,254
I've got
the ice pack ready to go!
386
00:15:21,338 --> 00:15:23,382
Where's your slap mark?
387
00:15:23,465 --> 00:15:25,509
She didn't slap me.
388
00:15:25,592 --> 00:15:26,718
Pizzaz,
she was crying.
389
00:15:26,802 --> 00:15:29,805
Yes, that's life
in Irradiance Woods.
390
00:15:29,888 --> 00:15:31,765
The ladies can be so cruel.
391
00:15:31,848 --> 00:15:32,557
[bee buzzes]
392
00:15:32,641 --> 00:15:35,352
You ungrateful hussy.
393
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:36,687
(Panache)
I'm going to--
394
00:15:36,770 --> 00:15:40,649
Look, Daddy's signing arm
is nearly frozen solid!
395
00:15:40,732 --> 00:15:43,443
That's no reason
to interrupt me, Accoutrement.
396
00:15:43,527 --> 00:15:45,445
We can just use a laser
to unfreeze it.
397
00:15:45,529 --> 00:15:47,572
Only a fool would suggest
such a reckless use
398
00:15:47,656 --> 00:15:50,242
of a precious laser.
399
00:15:50,325 --> 00:15:54,037
Then again, you have always been
a cheap, tacky laserite.
400
00:15:54,121 --> 00:15:56,498
Bite your tongue, Pizzaz!
401
00:15:56,581 --> 00:15:59,626
Don't stoop to their level.
402
00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:02,754
Oh, come on, stoop!
You know you wanna stoop!
403
00:16:02,838 --> 00:16:04,715
Go to hell.
404
00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:07,259
No, Pizzaz. No!
405
00:16:07,342 --> 00:16:08,552
[both gasp]
406
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:10,929
You crazy bitch!
407
00:16:11,012 --> 00:16:12,597
[gasps]
My God.
408
00:16:12,681 --> 00:16:15,100
You've taken steroids
to enhance your slapping arm!
409
00:16:15,183 --> 00:16:16,101
That's right.
410
00:16:16,184 --> 00:16:18,353
The days
of Accoutrement Panorama Miller
411
00:16:18,437 --> 00:16:20,605
being out-slapped are over!
412
00:16:20,689 --> 00:16:22,649
[all grunt]
413
00:16:22,733 --> 00:16:23,650
[gasps]
414
00:16:23,734 --> 00:16:24,651
Cheater!
415
00:16:24,735 --> 00:16:28,488
Charisma, what have
you done to yourself?
416
00:16:28,572 --> 00:16:31,283
I did what I had to do
to get ahead in this family,
417
00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:33,201
and if that means
replacing my arm
418
00:16:33,285 --> 00:16:36,288
with an aerodynamic mechanical
blade, then so be it!
419
00:16:36,371 --> 00:16:40,250
Old Jimmy Realperson.
420
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:42,711
Now, Rad, I notice you
haven't mentioned owning
421
00:16:42,794 --> 00:16:44,921
the original
Sawdust Jimmy Jesperson 10-inch,
422
00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:48,133
which represents a gaping hole
in any serious blues collection.
423
00:16:48,216 --> 00:16:51,636
Ha!
Sawdust Jimmy Jesperson?
424
00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:53,972
Oh, that's a well-known fake.
425
00:16:54,055 --> 00:16:56,600
But I saw a copy
at the Moonsonian Insti--
426
00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:58,518
No! Fake.
427
00:16:58,602 --> 00:17:00,812
Seems like Mendelson
should have known that.
428
00:17:00,896 --> 00:17:02,022
Makes me question
his credentials.
429
00:17:02,105 --> 00:17:05,901
Mm-hmm. Please, Rad,
more blues names!
430
00:17:05,984 --> 00:17:06,610
Uh...
431
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:08,820
Die, whore!
432
00:17:08,904 --> 00:17:09,571
[groans]
433
00:17:09,654 --> 00:17:12,741
Oh, take it!
434
00:17:12,824 --> 00:17:14,659
(Sophistica)
I hate your fat face!
435
00:17:14,743 --> 00:17:20,207
As predicted, your selfishness
has been your undoing.
436
00:17:20,290 --> 00:17:22,417
Shut up, all of you.
He's saying something!
437
00:17:22,501 --> 00:17:25,462
I'm now too frozen
to sign the will,
438
00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:27,589
so no one will get anything.
439
00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:28,965
What did he say?
440
00:17:29,049 --> 00:17:30,592
He said Accoutrement
gets everything
441
00:17:30,675 --> 00:17:31,802
and the rest of you
are all ugly and fat!
442
00:17:31,885 --> 00:17:34,179
I said no one gets anything!
443
00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:34,846
No one gets anything?
444
00:17:34,930 --> 00:17:36,389
This is all Pizzaz's fault.
445
00:17:36,473 --> 00:17:38,308
My fault?
446
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,685
You ruined everything,
Pizzaz!
447
00:17:40,769 --> 00:17:43,647
Why couldn't you
just stay away?
448
00:17:43,730 --> 00:17:45,273
Stop it. No.
449
00:17:45,357 --> 00:17:46,691
Watch out!
450
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:49,110
Aah!
451
00:17:49,194 --> 00:17:50,111
[all gasp]
452
00:17:50,195 --> 00:17:51,446
Daddy, no!
453
00:17:51,530 --> 00:17:53,365
(Pizzaz)
Daddy!
454
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:57,369
Pizzaz, you were always
my special girl.
455
00:17:57,452 --> 00:17:59,996
It broke my heart
when your scheming sisters
456
00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:02,833
forced you out
of the laser business.
457
00:18:02,916 --> 00:18:07,546
And now I've broken
your heart again.
458
00:18:07,629 --> 00:18:10,298
You're the only child
that's made me proud.
459
00:18:10,382 --> 00:18:12,259
The laser fortune is yours.
460
00:18:12,342 --> 00:18:13,218
(all)
What?
461
00:18:13,301 --> 00:18:15,387
Of course,
I've invested everything
462
00:18:15,470 --> 00:18:17,806
in the most stable
commodity there is:
463
00:18:17,889 --> 00:18:20,976
rare blues recordings.
464
00:18:23,478 --> 00:18:25,355
[all gasp]
- The laser fortune is mine!
465
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:27,774
Those are my blues!
466
00:18:27,858 --> 00:18:30,068
Take my cherished laser amulet.
467
00:18:30,151 --> 00:18:34,489
Use its power
to stop Panache!
468
00:18:34,573 --> 00:18:35,448
Panache fled
with Daddy's fortune.
469
00:18:35,532 --> 00:18:35,907
Let's go!
470
00:18:35,991 --> 00:18:38,952
Panache left me?
471
00:18:39,035 --> 00:18:42,163
Here, have a tissue.
This could be a long cry.
472
00:18:42,247 --> 00:18:45,292
No! We are through being pushed
around by these shrill cows.
473
00:18:45,375 --> 00:18:46,418
Let's get out of here
before they turn you
474
00:18:46,501 --> 00:18:49,629
into another one of
their useless, castrated losers!
475
00:18:49,713 --> 00:18:52,924
Don't listen to her, Dazzle.
There's no shame in what we are.
476
00:18:53,008 --> 00:18:54,759
And the castration procedure
is virtually painless.
477
00:18:54,843 --> 00:18:57,053
Dazzle, stay with us.
478
00:18:57,137 --> 00:19:00,515
Get away!
I'm not one of you!
479
00:19:00,599 --> 00:19:02,434
You're the kind of garbage
I usually drive to suicide
480
00:19:02,517 --> 00:19:05,729
by giving their wives
the ramming of their dreams!
481
00:19:05,812 --> 00:19:08,732
Go ahead. Leave!
482
00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:10,734
Wow!
Did you see them run away?
483
00:19:10,817 --> 00:19:12,652
I guess I'm a man
after all!
484
00:19:12,736 --> 00:19:16,281
Accoutrement!
It happened again!
485
00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:19,826
[Panache laughs]
486
00:19:19,910 --> 00:19:21,912
Get back here,
you spoiled slut!
487
00:19:21,995 --> 00:19:24,581
Sleepy Albert Keepsgoing,
488
00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:27,626
Weak Martin Wantstostop.
489
00:19:27,709 --> 00:19:30,754
Look!
A WaveTech Ten Thousand!
490
00:19:30,837 --> 00:19:32,255
It's the ultimate in yachting
luxury and performance.
491
00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:35,133
The owner of that boat is
clearly better than Rad.
492
00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:38,762
Look at that captain,
Captain Panache!
493
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:41,431
♪ Riding on the sea,
she's a Captain Panache ♪
494
00:19:43,934 --> 00:19:44,643
[amulet buzzing]
495
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:46,227
This is for you, Daddy.
[grunts]
496
00:19:50,398 --> 00:19:51,399
No!
497
00:19:56,071 --> 00:19:57,489
No!
498
00:19:57,572 --> 00:20:01,284
Oh, no!
Another WaveTech has exploded!
499
00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:04,162
Oh, what a day
for WaveTech!
500
00:20:04,245 --> 00:20:07,999
Look! A flaming blues record!
And it's coming right for us!
501
00:20:08,083 --> 00:20:10,794
Sawdust Jimmy Jesperson?
502
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:12,545
It's real!
503
00:20:15,799 --> 00:20:18,843
♪ I can't stop lying ♪
504
00:20:18,927 --> 00:20:19,970
♪ 'Cause I'm a liar ♪
505
00:20:20,053 --> 00:20:24,808
Gentlemen, this is
the Holy Grail of blues records.
506
00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:27,894
Rad Cunningham, you have been
completely discredited.
507
00:20:27,978 --> 00:20:32,357
You are now human garbage.
508
00:20:33,942 --> 00:20:35,527
(Chrysalis)
It's good to have you back,
Pizzaz.
509
00:20:35,610 --> 00:20:37,028
I mean, Ms. Miller.
510
00:20:37,112 --> 00:20:38,446
I mean, ma'am.
I mean, Chief.
511
00:20:38,530 --> 00:20:39,656
Chief! Oh, God.
Please don't hit me!
512
00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:42,033
Relax, sweetie.
513
00:20:42,117 --> 00:20:44,035
I've finally resolved
my deep-rooted anger issues,
514
00:20:44,119 --> 00:20:46,371
and I promise I'm going to be
nicer to everyone from now on.
515
00:20:46,454 --> 00:20:49,708
Great to hear, boss,
because I may have had
516
00:20:49,791 --> 00:20:51,293
another teensy
traffic stop incident.
517
00:20:54,546 --> 00:20:55,880
You mother--
518
00:20:57,966 --> 00:20:58,967
Chirp.
519
00:21:00,635 --> 00:21:04,180
Hey.
520
00:21:04,264 --> 00:21:06,725
(Rad)
Uh, Washboard
Lester Chinscratcher,
521
00:21:06,808 --> 00:21:07,892
Poor Ben Nickelfinder,
522
00:21:07,976 --> 00:21:10,854
Unblind Apple Jefferson,
523
00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:14,733
uh, American Louie...Sandpaper,
524
00:21:14,816 --> 00:21:15,817
Fat Eddie...Aids.