1
00:00:01,818 --> 00:00:03,168
- Can we all please stand?
2
00:00:03,395 --> 00:00:04,578
- Today's the day that
I've been waiting for.
3
00:00:04,730 --> 00:00:05,653
Today's the day
that I've prayed for.
4
00:00:05,673 --> 00:00:07,064
- Oh, [bleep].
5
00:00:07,082 --> 00:00:08,841
- Over three weeks ago,
6
00:00:09,068 --> 00:00:11,826
ten singles took
a brave leap of faith
7
00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:13,570
in order to find love.
8
00:00:13,589 --> 00:00:15,422
- You are beautiful.
- Aww, thank you.
9
00:00:15,574 --> 00:00:16,590
- They married
as complete strangers.
10
00:00:16,684 --> 00:00:20,168
[cheers and applause]
11
00:00:20,187 --> 00:00:21,578
- I'm married!
12
00:00:21,597 --> 00:00:22,763
[giggles]
13
00:00:22,915 --> 00:00:23,838
I'm somebody's wife.
14
00:00:23,932 --> 00:00:25,357
I'm Steve's wife.
15
00:00:25,584 --> 00:00:27,008
♪ ♪
16
00:00:27,028 --> 00:00:28,919
- Last week,
our remaining four couples
17
00:00:29,012 --> 00:00:31,605
explored what it would take
to fall in love
18
00:00:31,757 --> 00:00:34,608
in the real world.
19
00:00:34,702 --> 00:00:36,943
Noi and Steve.
20
00:00:37,038 --> 00:00:38,537
- I'm finally ready
21
00:00:38,688 --> 00:00:40,430
to let you know that I love you.
22
00:00:40,449 --> 00:00:43,267
- What?
[both laugh]
23
00:00:43,285 --> 00:00:44,618
You do?
24
00:00:44,770 --> 00:00:46,528
♪ ♪
25
00:00:46,547 --> 00:00:48,714
- Lindsey and Mark.
26
00:00:48,941 --> 00:00:50,698
- I want you to know
that you are appreciated
27
00:00:50,793 --> 00:00:52,384
and that you are cared for.
28
00:00:52,611 --> 00:00:54,628
And I don't want you
to ever think otherwise.
29
00:00:54,780 --> 00:00:55,888
- I feel the same way about you.
30
00:00:56,115 --> 00:00:58,115
♪ ♪
31
00:00:58,133 --> 00:01:00,133
- Jasmina and Michael.
32
00:01:00,227 --> 00:01:02,286
- Every three to four years,
[bleep] happened
33
00:01:02,304 --> 00:01:04,288
where I just
gotta deal with more grief.
34
00:01:04,381 --> 00:01:06,381
I've built a tolerance up
like a muscle
35
00:01:06,475 --> 00:01:09,551
of just, like, learning how
to put my emotions in a box
36
00:01:09,645 --> 00:01:11,219
and just move on.
37
00:01:11,313 --> 00:01:12,554
- I'm very happy
38
00:01:12,648 --> 00:01:14,389
that he's finally, you know,
39
00:01:14,408 --> 00:01:17,150
opening up and letting me in.
40
00:01:17,303 --> 00:01:20,304
- Katina and Olajuwon.
41
00:01:20,397 --> 00:01:22,306
- When we talk about
a wife level,
42
00:01:22,324 --> 00:01:23,749
this is what I look at.
43
00:01:23,900 --> 00:01:25,142
- I know and I--
- I need to see
44
00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:26,568
where you are as a woman.
45
00:01:26,662 --> 00:01:27,586
If you don't want to cook,
46
00:01:27,813 --> 00:01:28,736
what are you--
What are you gonna do?
47
00:01:28,831 --> 00:01:29,980
Are you gonna clean?
48
00:01:29,998 --> 00:01:31,164
I care for you so much.
49
00:01:31,258 --> 00:01:32,649
But it bothers me
50
00:01:32,742 --> 00:01:34,167
because I don't know
where you stand.
51
00:01:34,320 --> 00:01:37,763
♪ ♪
52
00:01:37,990 --> 00:01:40,674
- And tonight,
with less than five weeks
53
00:01:40,768 --> 00:01:43,102
until Decision Day,
54
00:01:43,329 --> 00:01:46,605
our couples must
explore ways to go deeper.
55
00:01:46,756 --> 00:01:48,515
- [laughs]
- What are you doing, yo?
56
00:01:48,667 --> 00:01:51,001
- In order to form
a foundation of trust
57
00:01:51,094 --> 00:01:53,337
and intimacy in their marriages
58
00:01:53,355 --> 00:01:54,671
before they have to make
59
00:01:54,764 --> 00:01:57,599
the biggest decision
of their lives.
60
00:01:57,693 --> 00:02:02,103
- We should try to have sex
61
00:02:02,197 --> 00:02:04,623
in a semi-public place.
62
00:02:04,850 --> 00:02:05,699
[both laugh]
63
00:02:05,793 --> 00:02:06,959
- If I'm being honest,
64
00:02:07,110 --> 00:02:08,185
my vagina not
getting wet for you.
65
00:02:08,203 --> 00:02:10,036
♪ ♪
66
00:02:10,189 --> 00:02:12,372
- Tell me about the trajectory
of your sex life.
67
00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:13,857
- So the way--
68
00:02:13,950 --> 00:02:15,783
- Okay.
- It isn't really satisfying.
69
00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:19,363
- You need to not be so rude
when you're talking about it.
70
00:02:19,381 --> 00:02:20,788
You're gonna say she's lazy.
71
00:02:20,883 --> 00:02:22,883
- To be married to someone
72
00:02:22,977 --> 00:02:25,886
who talks about your, like,
insecurities.
73
00:02:25,980 --> 00:02:28,796
It just makes me feel
like I'm not, like--
74
00:02:28,891 --> 00:02:30,983
I'm, like, I'm not good enough.
75
00:02:31,134 --> 00:02:33,560
[sniffles]
76
00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:35,562
- ♪ It's all or nothing ♪
77
00:02:35,714 --> 00:02:37,898
- This is
"Married at First Sight."
78
00:02:37,992 --> 00:02:41,551
- ♪ There's no other way ♪
79
00:02:41,645 --> 00:02:43,811
♪ It's all or nothing ♪
80
00:02:43,831 --> 00:02:46,740
- ♪ Finally feel ♪
81
00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:51,395
♪ Alive ♪
82
00:02:51,413 --> 00:02:53,154
- Good morning.
83
00:02:53,174 --> 00:02:54,822
We're still
resolving our issues,
84
00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:57,083
we're still having good times.
85
00:02:57,236 --> 00:02:58,660
- Still are married.
86
00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:00,587
- Still married.
87
00:03:00,739 --> 00:03:02,072
See?
88
00:03:02,165 --> 00:03:03,331
- It has now been over
three weeks since
89
00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:05,742
our couples met
and married at first sight.
90
00:03:05,761 --> 00:03:07,519
- He said he wanted me
to work out with him.
91
00:03:07,746 --> 00:03:09,596
♪ ♪
92
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:11,023
- And only two weeks
93
00:03:11,250 --> 00:03:13,174
since they moved in together
as husband and wife.
94
00:03:13,194 --> 00:03:15,176
- Did you see my other brush?
95
00:03:15,270 --> 00:03:17,103
- It's not--
It's not in the bathroom?
96
00:03:17,256 --> 00:03:19,423
- No, I literally just
had it in my hand.
97
00:03:19,441 --> 00:03:20,699
♪ ♪
98
00:03:20,850 --> 00:03:22,275
- It's this one?
99
00:03:22,428 --> 00:03:23,869
- Yeah, where'd you find it?
100
00:03:24,096 --> 00:03:25,370
- Bathroom.
101
00:03:25,597 --> 00:03:27,206
- [chuckles]
102
00:03:27,433 --> 00:03:29,616
- As they continue to form
their new lives together,
103
00:03:29,768 --> 00:03:32,527
it's important to strengthen
their connection by delving
104
00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:34,195
into deeper levels of trust
105
00:03:34,215 --> 00:03:36,215
and intimacy in their marriage.
106
00:03:36,366 --> 00:03:38,942
But giving this process
everything they've got
107
00:03:38,961 --> 00:03:41,795
is crucial,
because in just five weeks,
108
00:03:41,947 --> 00:03:43,447
they will have to make
a decision whether
109
00:03:43,540 --> 00:03:46,466
they're going to stay married
or get a divorce.
110
00:03:46,618 --> 00:03:48,393
♪ ♪
111
00:03:48,545 --> 00:03:49,953
- ♪ Hey ♪
112
00:03:49,972 --> 00:03:52,731
♪ Yeah, oh ♪
113
00:03:52,958 --> 00:03:56,384
♪ ♪
114
00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:57,736
- Yo, chica.
115
00:03:57,963 --> 00:04:00,313
- You're bigger than me
right now, it's so great.
116
00:04:00,466 --> 00:04:02,466
I feel like I could hug you.
117
00:04:02,484 --> 00:04:03,891
♪ ♪
118
00:04:03,911 --> 00:04:05,410
- What's the story?
119
00:04:05,562 --> 00:04:08,563
- So I do think
Mark's a good guy.
120
00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:10,398
I do see the potential in him.
121
00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:12,659
But let me tell you
what upsets me, like,
122
00:04:12,811 --> 00:04:14,327
he started being intimate with
me and then pulling way back.
123
00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:16,813
- Why?
124
00:04:16,832 --> 00:04:18,757
- Like, he keeps telling me,
125
00:04:18,984 --> 00:04:20,150
"I don't want to just
have sex with you.
126
00:04:20,243 --> 00:04:22,076
I want it to be
intimate and emotional."
127
00:04:22,096 --> 00:04:23,929
And I was like, "Okay,
well, what is that for you?"
128
00:04:24,080 --> 00:04:25,489
- Right.
- Because--
129
00:04:25,507 --> 00:04:26,490
- What does that look like,
sound like--
130
00:04:26,583 --> 00:04:27,991
- You were the one
who initiated sex
131
00:04:28,010 --> 00:04:29,768
on the night you met me,
so it can't be that important
132
00:04:29,919 --> 00:04:31,603
to you if you were
willing to do that.
133
00:04:31,755 --> 00:04:33,438
I was the one who said no.
134
00:04:33,590 --> 00:04:34,848
He hasn't had sex with me
for almost two weeks.
135
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:35,941
14 days, right?
- Oof.
136
00:04:36,168 --> 00:04:37,442
- Mm-hmm.
137
00:04:37,669 --> 00:04:40,003
- And you're still
in this relationship?
138
00:04:40,022 --> 00:04:41,446
[laughs]
139
00:04:41,673 --> 00:04:43,340
- Today, we're--
We take a little nap.
140
00:04:43,358 --> 00:04:44,616
I wake up and he, like,
141
00:04:44,843 --> 00:04:46,009
takes my clothes off
like we're gonna have sex
142
00:04:46,028 --> 00:04:47,694
and I was like,
"Okay, I'm into it."
143
00:04:47,846 --> 00:04:49,604
- Mm-hmm.
144
00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:51,848
- No, it was like
a quick and dirty.
145
00:04:51,867 --> 00:04:53,959
He didn't worry about me.
146
00:04:54,186 --> 00:04:55,368
At all.
147
00:04:55,521 --> 00:04:56,962
I was like,
"It doesn't work like that,
148
00:04:57,189 --> 00:04:58,355
you know,
there's two people here."
149
00:04:58,373 --> 00:04:59,464
- Mm-hmm.
- Finished pretty quickly
150
00:04:59,616 --> 00:05:00,465
and then was like,
"I gotta go pee
151
00:05:00,617 --> 00:05:02,116
and then I'm gonna go work out,"
152
00:05:02,136 --> 00:05:03,860
and I said, "You know,
I just gotta ask you something.
153
00:05:03,879 --> 00:05:06,029
"You told me that you haven't
been able to have sex with me
154
00:05:06,122 --> 00:05:07,639
because you need
an emotional connection."
155
00:05:07,866 --> 00:05:09,474
- Mm-hmm.
- That wasn't emotional to me
156
00:05:09,626 --> 00:05:11,201
in any sense.
157
00:05:11,294 --> 00:05:12,477
And I was like,
"All right, leave.
158
00:05:12,629 --> 00:05:14,721
I'll get my vibrator,
I got this."
159
00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:16,556
- So weird.
160
00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:18,633
Because he's also--
He's such the pleaser,
161
00:05:18,727 --> 00:05:19,967
you would think he wouldn't--
162
00:05:20,062 --> 00:05:21,394
- No pleasing here, girl.
163
00:05:21,547 --> 00:05:23,063
No pleasing at all.
164
00:05:23,215 --> 00:05:24,489
- Hmm.
- None.
165
00:05:24,716 --> 00:05:26,474
My sexual needs
were being more met
166
00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:28,568
when I was single and dating.
167
00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:29,995
My thing is,
168
00:05:30,146 --> 00:05:31,997
what is an emotional connection
to you, then?
169
00:05:32,148 --> 00:05:33,815
Help me define it.
170
00:05:33,909 --> 00:05:34,982
- But it's more than that.
171
00:05:35,077 --> 00:05:36,560
He wants
this intimate connection,
172
00:05:36,578 --> 00:05:37,485
and I hear you,
'cause he's had--
173
00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:38,653
- Okay, well define it to me.
174
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:40,172
What is that?
175
00:05:40,399 --> 00:05:42,082
Is that laughing and
enjoying each other's times
176
00:05:42,176 --> 00:05:44,492
and moving through conflict
and finding a resolution?
177
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:46,753
- It's that--it's that look.
178
00:05:46,905 --> 00:05:48,329
It's that feeling.
179
00:05:48,349 --> 00:05:49,923
- Oh, no, no, no, gross.
180
00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:50,849
I don't want that.
181
00:05:51,076 --> 00:05:52,592
- [laughs]
182
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:56,246
I know you don't like
to take things that slowly.
183
00:05:56,264 --> 00:05:57,581
But, like, you're the toaster,
and he feels like
184
00:05:57,674 --> 00:05:59,265
he's gotta take
all the pieces apart
185
00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:00,692
and understand how to put them
back together again
186
00:06:00,919 --> 00:06:02,435
before he
can even put the bread in.
187
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,270
- Mm.
- Right?
188
00:06:04,423 --> 00:06:06,531
Lindsey speed,
you need to tone it down.
189
00:06:09,370 --> 00:06:10,777
- It's a lot.
190
00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:12,854
- It is a lot.
191
00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:17,117
But you're not the type
that's gonna give up on this.
192
00:06:17,211 --> 00:06:19,285
- You know,
the way things are going,
193
00:06:19,380 --> 00:06:20,695
it seems like
194
00:06:20,714 --> 00:06:23,957
we will never have sex again.
195
00:06:24,109 --> 00:06:25,625
And I will become
the Sahara Desert.
196
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,944
I will dry up like a vault.
197
00:06:27,963 --> 00:06:30,797
He needs to step up a little
bit, if I'm being honest.
198
00:06:30,949 --> 00:06:32,707
I need a lot more
than what he's giving me.
199
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,184
It's not enough.
200
00:06:36,121 --> 00:06:36,970
♪ ♪
201
00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:39,789
- ♪ Mm ♪
202
00:06:39,808 --> 00:06:42,792
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
203
00:06:42,811 --> 00:06:44,736
♪ ♪
204
00:06:44,888 --> 00:06:47,889
- Sit on this couch,
I'll fall asleep for real.
205
00:06:47,983 --> 00:06:50,409
- Last night when Olajuwon said,
206
00:06:50,636 --> 00:06:52,652
"I wasn't
stepping up as a wife,"
207
00:06:52,804 --> 00:06:54,413
I felt bad because
208
00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:57,749
I take being a wife to him
very seriously.
209
00:06:57,901 --> 00:07:00,827
It made me feel like I was
kind of disappointing him
210
00:07:00,979 --> 00:07:02,495
and then also
disappointing myself.
211
00:07:02,648 --> 00:07:04,664
It--it definitely was just,
like, yeah.
212
00:07:04,816 --> 00:07:05,832
[knock at door]
You wanna get the door?
213
00:07:05,926 --> 00:07:07,150
- Yeah, I got it.
214
00:07:07,243 --> 00:07:09,653
- I am excited to see
Dr. Viviana
215
00:07:09,671 --> 00:07:13,323
'cause I'm interested to see
what her opinion and take is
216
00:07:13,416 --> 00:07:16,918
on our marriage
and how we're doing.
217
00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:18,085
- Hi!
- Hi, how you doing?
218
00:07:18,105 --> 00:07:20,421
Viviana, how you doing?
- Hello!
219
00:07:20,515 --> 00:07:21,681
Each marriage for our couples
220
00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:23,516
is uniquely different,
221
00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:26,278
and comes with its own set
of strengths and challenges.
222
00:07:26,505 --> 00:07:28,521
Aw, it's so good to see you!
- It's good to see you too.
223
00:07:28,674 --> 00:07:30,431
- But for our couples,
it's important
224
00:07:30,525 --> 00:07:31,933
to become completely vulnerable
225
00:07:32,027 --> 00:07:33,693
in order to build trust
226
00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:35,528
in an accelerated way.
227
00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:37,789
As y'all know,
228
00:07:38,016 --> 00:07:40,016
we kind of know
everything that's going on.
229
00:07:40,109 --> 00:07:41,534
We're kept
abreast of everything.
230
00:07:41,687 --> 00:07:42,961
So.
231
00:07:43,112 --> 00:07:45,613
You've been through
a lot as a couple.
232
00:07:45,632 --> 00:07:47,707
But why is it that
233
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:50,284
every time I hear about what's
happening between y'all,
234
00:07:50,378 --> 00:07:53,546
we're talking about
food and cooking?
235
00:07:53,699 --> 00:07:55,882
- I know.
- I mean, what is that?
236
00:07:56,034 --> 00:07:58,977
- The cooking and food.
237
00:07:59,204 --> 00:08:00,628
That's what I--I need
in my wife, I need that.
238
00:08:00,722 --> 00:08:02,222
- So did you not eat
239
00:08:02,316 --> 00:08:04,390
before you were married?
240
00:08:04,485 --> 00:08:06,818
- To me, I would--I could grab
anything on the go and--
241
00:08:07,045 --> 00:08:08,728
Or I could make
something easy and small,
242
00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:10,396
but I have a wife now.
243
00:08:10,491 --> 00:08:12,398
And she works at home.
244
00:08:12,551 --> 00:08:13,883
- Where did you get these ideas
245
00:08:13,902 --> 00:08:17,329
about what a skill set is
for a wife?
246
00:08:17,480 --> 00:08:18,905
- That--that's just in me.
247
00:08:19,057 --> 00:08:23,168
I'm okay with taking care
of the household if I'm happy.
248
00:08:23,395 --> 00:08:24,986
And I--
249
00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:26,821
- But if you're not happy,
you're just gonna drop it?
250
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,248
- Then--no,
I'm not gonna drop it.
251
00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:30,734
But it's--then I--
I look at this as, like,
252
00:08:30,827 --> 00:08:33,661
why am I in this marriage?
253
00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,088
I mean, I can point out stories,
254
00:08:35,182 --> 00:08:36,406
it's more than just
cooking and cleaning.
255
00:08:36,499 --> 00:08:37,849
It's, like,
we had a housewarming.
256
00:08:38,076 --> 00:08:39,242
- Mm-hmm.
257
00:08:39,261 --> 00:08:40,577
- [clears throat]
- Oh, I know, I know
258
00:08:40,595 --> 00:08:41,686
all about housewarming.
- I did all that.
259
00:08:41,838 --> 00:08:43,413
- I kept it
very easy for my wife.
260
00:08:43,506 --> 00:08:44,689
But then at
the end of the night,
261
00:08:44,841 --> 00:08:46,340
we're not--
When it's time to clean,
262
00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:49,586
the remark of saying,
"I'ma clean half the floor,"
263
00:08:49,679 --> 00:08:51,863
it bothers me because
now I question,
264
00:08:52,015 --> 00:08:54,533
are we mentally
on the same level?
265
00:08:54,760 --> 00:08:55,925
- Mentally?
266
00:08:56,019 --> 00:08:57,351
- Like--no, like--
- You're questioning
267
00:08:57,371 --> 00:08:58,853
her mental capabilities...
- No, because--
268
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:01,097
- Based off of wanting
to clean maybe less?
269
00:09:01,190 --> 00:09:02,448
- I'll--I'll put it like this.
270
00:09:02,601 --> 00:09:03,767
No, it's not even like--
I'll put it this way.
271
00:09:03,785 --> 00:09:04,859
- That's what
you just said, though.
272
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,360
- If I said--no, 100%.
273
00:09:06,380 --> 00:09:08,046
But if I saw my wife cleaning
274
00:09:08,197 --> 00:09:09,622
at night or something like that,
275
00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:12,533
I'm not putting my head
on the pillow to close my eyes
276
00:09:12,627 --> 00:09:14,277
knowing that it bothers my wife
277
00:09:14,370 --> 00:09:16,555
that the place
isn't sharp enough.
278
00:09:16,782 --> 00:09:18,281
And the fact that it
happened literally, like,
279
00:09:18,374 --> 00:09:20,116
two days again after that.
280
00:09:20,209 --> 00:09:22,561
There's a level
of where am I being met?
281
00:09:22,712 --> 00:09:23,953
Like, you did it--
282
00:09:23,972 --> 00:09:25,789
For a house woman,
you didn't handle it?
283
00:09:25,807 --> 00:09:27,732
As--as a wife,
I felt like it wasn't met.
284
00:09:30,462 --> 00:09:32,796
- So I can understand feeling,
like,
285
00:09:32,889 --> 00:09:35,907
"Well, if there isn't
a happiness
286
00:09:36,059 --> 00:09:38,410
"or a partnership feeling
at home,
287
00:09:38,561 --> 00:09:39,744
then--then why
am I doing this?"
288
00:09:39,971 --> 00:09:42,581
But to make it ride on something
289
00:09:42,808 --> 00:09:44,157
as trivial as cooking
and cleaning?
290
00:09:44,309 --> 00:09:45,992
Man, of all things,
291
00:09:46,144 --> 00:09:47,827
why does it matter?
292
00:09:47,979 --> 00:09:50,330
- Because I--it's impacting
our marriage, I can feel it.
293
00:09:50,424 --> 00:09:51,664
- So how do you think
294
00:09:51,817 --> 00:09:54,500
that affects your trust
with him?
295
00:09:54,595 --> 00:09:57,003
- It makes me feel like
I'm with someone that
296
00:09:57,097 --> 00:09:59,005
if I do something wrong,
they're gonna, like,
297
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:00,265
threaten to leave me.
298
00:10:00,492 --> 00:10:02,158
♪ ♪
299
00:10:02,251 --> 00:10:03,602
- I want you
to start thinking about us
300
00:10:03,753 --> 00:10:05,586
because regardless of what
301
00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:07,330
everything around us,
this is real.
302
00:10:07,349 --> 00:10:09,182
What's happening right there.
- Can I pause you right there?
303
00:10:09,334 --> 00:10:11,425
Do you think she doesn't
think about y'all?
304
00:10:11,445 --> 00:10:14,838
- No, I think she thinks of I.
305
00:10:14,856 --> 00:10:16,931
I talked to her about laziness.
306
00:10:17,025 --> 00:10:18,933
It's just really--really,
I feel like there's a lot of--
307
00:10:19,027 --> 00:10:20,101
- You think she's lazy?
308
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:21,268
- When it comes to our marriage,
309
00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:22,454
just caring
for the other person,
310
00:10:22,605 --> 00:10:24,180
the effort isn't there.
- Wow.
311
00:10:24,273 --> 00:10:26,124
- It's--it's really triggering.
312
00:10:26,351 --> 00:10:27,684
It's--I'm not being met,
I'm just--
313
00:10:27,702 --> 00:10:30,186
- So it almost sounds like
you have this idea
314
00:10:30,205 --> 00:10:31,704
of what marriage looks like.
315
00:10:31,857 --> 00:10:33,523
You have this idea about
what a husband looks like,
316
00:10:33,616 --> 00:10:35,133
what a wife looks like.
- No.
317
00:10:35,284 --> 00:10:39,195
- And unless she looks
100% like that off the bat,
318
00:10:39,288 --> 00:10:40,454
you're gonna talk down to her,
319
00:10:40,548 --> 00:10:42,031
you're gonna say
she's not grown,
320
00:10:42,050 --> 00:10:43,700
you're gonna say she's lazy.
321
00:10:43,793 --> 00:10:45,459
That's what
it's coming across as.
322
00:10:45,553 --> 00:10:47,646
I would hope that that's
not what's actually going on.
323
00:10:47,797 --> 00:10:49,722
But as an outsider,
that's what it looks like.
324
00:10:49,875 --> 00:10:51,149
- No--
- And I would love for her
325
00:10:51,376 --> 00:10:52,542
not to think that.
- No, she--she knows that.
326
00:10:52,635 --> 00:10:54,152
- She's the most
important person in your life.
327
00:10:54,379 --> 00:10:55,378
- But she knows that,
I just feel like--
328
00:10:55,397 --> 00:10:57,489
- Does she?
Katina, do you know that?
329
00:10:57,716 --> 00:11:00,049
♪ ♪
330
00:11:00,068 --> 00:11:01,734
- [sighs]
331
00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:03,569
- What is the struggle there?
332
00:11:03,664 --> 00:11:05,330
- It's just his tone.
333
00:11:05,557 --> 00:11:08,333
Like, I feel like
someone's beating up on me.
334
00:11:08,560 --> 00:11:10,001
So like, some of the things
that he's saying,
335
00:11:10,153 --> 00:11:13,413
they're already, like,
insecurities that I felt.
336
00:11:13,565 --> 00:11:15,489
I mean, for this process,
to be--
337
00:11:15,509 --> 00:11:17,083
To be married to someone
338
00:11:17,235 --> 00:11:21,421
who calls out your,
like, insecurities.
339
00:11:21,515 --> 00:11:24,090
- Calls out your faults.
340
00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:25,666
- ♪ Do you want ♪
341
00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:27,852
♪ Do you want love ♪
342
00:11:28,004 --> 00:11:29,429
♪ Will it all work out ♪
343
00:11:29,581 --> 00:11:31,005
- [sniffles]
344
00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:32,023
- ♪ I want love ♪
345
00:11:32,175 --> 00:11:34,341
♪ Yeah, I want love ♪
346
00:11:34,361 --> 00:11:36,177
♪ We all have our doubts ♪
347
00:11:36,196 --> 00:11:39,197
- It just makes me
feel like I'm not, like--
348
00:11:39,348 --> 00:11:41,441
Like, I'm not good enough.
349
00:11:41,593 --> 00:11:43,684
♪ ♪
350
00:11:43,704 --> 00:11:46,788
- ♪ Now there's a change
in me ♪
351
00:11:50,860 --> 00:11:53,027
- To be married to someone who
352
00:11:53,046 --> 00:11:56,456
calls out your, like,
insecurities.
353
00:11:56,550 --> 00:11:58,458
[sniffles]
354
00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:03,370
♪ ♪
355
00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:06,466
It just makes me feel
like I'm not, like--
356
00:12:06,618 --> 00:12:08,634
Like I'm not good enough.
357
00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:10,395
♪ ♪
358
00:12:10,546 --> 00:12:12,564
It's just hard for me.
359
00:12:12,791 --> 00:12:14,733
When you're telling me that,
like,
360
00:12:14,884 --> 00:12:17,718
oh, like, I'm lazy or,
like, things like that.
361
00:12:17,738 --> 00:12:20,296
That's all the echoes
that I'm hearing in my mind.
362
00:12:20,389 --> 00:12:23,241
So your tone and,
like, the--you--
363
00:12:23,392 --> 00:12:24,634
The words that you choose,
364
00:12:24,652 --> 00:12:26,302
even though
it might be your truth,
365
00:12:26,395 --> 00:12:28,137
they're al--also very harsh.
366
00:12:28,156 --> 00:12:30,397
♪ ♪
367
00:12:30,492 --> 00:12:32,083
Your energy, your tone,
368
00:12:32,235 --> 00:12:34,419
that is what
you need to work on.
369
00:12:36,239 --> 00:12:37,589
- I hear that, the--
370
00:12:37,816 --> 00:12:38,923
- What did--what did
you hear her just say?
371
00:12:39,150 --> 00:12:40,500
- It's my tone,
I have to work on my tone.
372
00:12:40,652 --> 00:12:42,093
- Tell her, "I hear you say
373
00:12:42,245 --> 00:12:44,262
that I need to work on--"
- I hear you say
374
00:12:44,413 --> 00:12:46,656
I need to work on my tone.
- What else?
375
00:12:46,749 --> 00:12:48,415
- My demeanor?
- What else?
376
00:12:48,510 --> 00:12:50,417
- I--that's really it, that's
what I heard out of that.
377
00:12:50,437 --> 00:12:53,605
- And--and pointing out
her faults and insecurities,
378
00:12:53,832 --> 00:12:55,923
especially when they're
triggers for her.
379
00:12:56,017 --> 00:12:57,275
- Right.
- That's not taking care
380
00:12:57,426 --> 00:12:58,518
of your wife.
381
00:12:58,670 --> 00:13:01,854
♪ ♪
382
00:13:02,007 --> 00:13:03,764
- You're my wife.
383
00:13:03,858 --> 00:13:06,117
There's gonna be things that
I just expect it to be done.
384
00:13:06,344 --> 00:13:07,601
And same thing with me,
I'm your husband,
385
00:13:07,621 --> 00:13:09,362
there's things I expect
to be done.
386
00:13:09,514 --> 00:13:12,273
Those are big moments
for me where I'm like,
387
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,182
"I need my partner."
- But why are they
388
00:13:13,201 --> 00:13:14,534
such big moments?
389
00:13:14,686 --> 00:13:15,776
I don't understand.
390
00:13:15,796 --> 00:13:17,537
- They are--it's not--
'cause they are.
391
00:13:17,631 --> 00:13:20,706
- I feel like somebody
taught you something that is
392
00:13:20,859 --> 00:13:22,525
gonna make you end up divorced
393
00:13:22,618 --> 00:13:23,968
several times.
- No, it's--
394
00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:27,454
- Because that expectation
of marriage,
395
00:13:27,474 --> 00:13:30,049
of what real-life marriage
looks like?
396
00:13:30,201 --> 00:13:33,386
I just think, like,
it's gonna topple over.
397
00:13:33,538 --> 00:13:36,815
I feel like I don't really know
how I'm going to help you
398
00:13:37,042 --> 00:13:39,559
if you have
this archaic idea about--
399
00:13:39,653 --> 00:13:43,396
And very flimsy idea about
what makes a good wife.
400
00:13:43,548 --> 00:13:44,989
Especially
because I believe that
401
00:13:45,141 --> 00:13:49,052
physical and emotional intimacy
are so precious.
402
00:13:49,070 --> 00:13:52,388
And that's what life
is all about with a partner.
403
00:13:52,481 --> 00:13:55,816
If it's hinging
on cooking and cleaning,
404
00:13:55,836 --> 00:13:57,836
it is--it's
too flimsy of an argument.
405
00:13:58,063 --> 00:14:00,563
You're not gonna make it
with anybody.
406
00:14:00,656 --> 00:14:02,231
- It's not that,
it's everything--
407
00:14:02,325 --> 00:14:03,749
- No, I'm telling you it is.
408
00:14:03,902 --> 00:14:04,901
- I know, I know.
- Because I'm an expert in this
409
00:14:04,994 --> 00:14:05,826
and I know what--
- I'm saying it about
410
00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:07,178
myself, though.
411
00:14:07,405 --> 00:14:08,662
It's not about the cooking
and cleaning,
412
00:14:08,682 --> 00:14:09,589
I feel like--
- Okay, if it's outside
413
00:14:09,683 --> 00:14:10,907
of cooking and cleaning,
414
00:14:10,925 --> 00:14:13,017
what is it that you
think she needs
415
00:14:13,244 --> 00:14:15,261
to grow in this way in order
to not be lazy
416
00:14:15,355 --> 00:14:17,188
and not show that
417
00:14:17,415 --> 00:14:19,173
she's ambivalent
about our marriage?
418
00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:21,675
- Maybe I was expressing
it the wrong way.
419
00:14:21,695 --> 00:14:23,436
Like.
420
00:14:23,588 --> 00:14:27,014
It's frustrating because...
421
00:14:27,033 --> 00:14:29,275
I care for you.
422
00:14:29,427 --> 00:14:32,853
♪ ♪
423
00:14:32,873 --> 00:14:35,856
I get emotional because...
[clears throat]
424
00:14:35,876 --> 00:14:38,451
When you feel like
you're giving 100...
425
00:14:38,603 --> 00:14:40,603
- Say I.
- When I feel like
426
00:14:40,696 --> 00:14:44,365
I'm giving myself
and I'm not being met.
427
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:46,367
So it's tough
428
00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:49,962
when I talk to you,
and I get no reaction.
429
00:14:50,115 --> 00:14:51,447
- Mm.
430
00:14:51,466 --> 00:14:54,283
- And I express how I feel.
431
00:14:54,302 --> 00:14:56,227
Because-- [clears throat]
432
00:14:56,454 --> 00:15:00,139
I can't grow if I don't know
how you feel.
433
00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:01,958
It's frustrating.
434
00:15:01,976 --> 00:15:03,234
- It's not frustrating,
it's scary.
435
00:15:03,386 --> 00:15:04,627
- It's scary.
436
00:15:04,646 --> 00:15:07,463
It's scary.
437
00:15:07,482 --> 00:15:08,965
[clears throat]
438
00:15:08,983 --> 00:15:10,149
Please open up.
439
00:15:10,301 --> 00:15:11,743
The cooking and cleaning,
440
00:15:11,970 --> 00:15:13,319
you don't have
to do that every day.
441
00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:14,987
I point those things out
442
00:15:15,140 --> 00:15:16,989
because that's the only way
I could kinda
443
00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:19,083
bring it to you.
444
00:15:19,235 --> 00:15:22,328
You see, I--I am emotional
with this marriage.
445
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:24,814
You can see my frustration
is coming off of the lack
446
00:15:24,832 --> 00:15:28,317
of--of you being vulnerable.
447
00:15:28,336 --> 00:15:29,576
- How do you feel about
448
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:31,320
what I'm saying
about how he's saying,
449
00:15:31,339 --> 00:15:32,413
what he's saying?
450
00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:34,265
- Um.
451
00:15:34,417 --> 00:15:36,325
I hear what you're saying,
452
00:15:36,344 --> 00:15:38,995
and I am gonna try
my best--my very best
453
00:15:39,088 --> 00:15:41,088
to be more vulnerable
and open with you
454
00:15:41,107 --> 00:15:44,333
and tell you what's on my mind,
tell you my thoughts.
455
00:15:44,427 --> 00:15:45,518
I'm serious when I tell you that
456
00:15:45,670 --> 00:15:48,354
I do want to be married to you.
457
00:15:48,506 --> 00:15:51,432
- I don't want you to operate
from a place of fear anymore.
458
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:52,675
Okay?
459
00:15:52,768 --> 00:15:54,953
If you don't share with him,
460
00:15:55,180 --> 00:15:56,770
he's not gonna know you
well enough
461
00:15:56,790 --> 00:15:58,456
to be able to say yes
462
00:15:58,683 --> 00:16:00,441
to staying together
on Decision Day.
463
00:16:00,535 --> 00:16:02,126
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay?
464
00:16:05,023 --> 00:16:09,283
- ♪ You gotta pick up
all the pieces and restart ♪
465
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:10,635
- Thank you.
- No problem.
466
00:16:10,862 --> 00:16:12,953
- Smells nice next to the
low tide smell.
467
00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:14,621
- Right. Oh!
[laughs]
468
00:16:14,641 --> 00:16:17,200
- In addition to meeting
with the couples in person,
469
00:16:17,293 --> 00:16:19,143
Dr. Viviana sent the couples
470
00:16:19,295 --> 00:16:23,630
exercises to help them discuss
the big and the small things
471
00:16:23,650 --> 00:16:26,042
that couples
often avoid talking about.
472
00:16:26,060 --> 00:16:29,378
- "What is your favorite
sexual position and why?"
473
00:16:29,397 --> 00:16:31,805
- It's being on top
because recently,
474
00:16:31,825 --> 00:16:33,974
I've discovered a G-spot orgasm.
475
00:16:33,994 --> 00:16:35,551
So that's gonna
take the bank for me.
476
00:16:35,570 --> 00:16:36,886
- Okay.
477
00:16:36,904 --> 00:16:38,571
- Honest communication
478
00:16:38,723 --> 00:16:42,333
is the key to building
trust and intimacy,
479
00:16:42,560 --> 00:16:44,243
which leads
to a healthy marriage.
480
00:16:44,395 --> 00:16:47,079
- "What would you think if you
caught me watching porn?"
481
00:16:47,232 --> 00:16:50,657
- I think it might turn me on,
actually.
482
00:16:50,677 --> 00:16:51,901
- [swallows]
Obviously, I would love
483
00:16:51,919 --> 00:16:53,494
to experience that with you.
484
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:55,013
It would just be fun
to catch you in the act.
485
00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:57,573
[both laugh]
486
00:16:57,592 --> 00:16:59,666
- If you could change
one thing about me physically,
487
00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:00,685
what would it be?
488
00:17:03,248 --> 00:17:04,338
For real.
489
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,098
- Y'all hear my husband?
- For real.
490
00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:11,178
♪ ♪
491
00:17:11,197 --> 00:17:13,439
- "What can I do better
in our marriage?
492
00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,199
And why?"
493
00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:20,279
- Talk to me.
494
00:17:20,373 --> 00:17:22,431
Just throughout the day.
495
00:17:22,450 --> 00:17:24,191
Just about the small things.
496
00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:27,879
I feel like those
small conversations
497
00:17:28,030 --> 00:17:30,790
can lead to us
having bigger ones.
498
00:17:30,942 --> 00:17:33,200
- [clears throat]
- [clears throat]
499
00:17:33,294 --> 00:17:35,202
Wow, this game was so much fun.
500
00:17:35,296 --> 00:17:36,128
- Now you're done, right?
501
00:17:36,281 --> 00:17:38,130
[both laugh]
502
00:17:38,283 --> 00:17:40,040
"What can you do better
in our marriage?"
503
00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:43,119
I would say listen
and understand me.
504
00:17:43,137 --> 00:17:45,638
Just know I'm not--
I'm not--I'm not your enemy.
505
00:17:45,790 --> 00:17:47,123
- [chuckles]
- You know what I'm saying?
506
00:17:47,216 --> 00:17:48,382
I really--I really mean that.
507
00:17:48,401 --> 00:17:49,458
Like, I just want you to know
508
00:17:49,552 --> 00:17:50,902
that it's not you against me.
509
00:17:51,053 --> 00:17:51,977
Does that makes sense?
510
00:17:52,130 --> 00:17:53,129
- Mm-hmm.
511
00:17:53,222 --> 00:17:54,572
Okay.
- All right, you go.
512
00:17:57,135 --> 00:17:58,725
Hmm.
513
00:17:58,745 --> 00:18:00,394
- Is there anything you have--
- Nope.
514
00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:01,804
- [giggles]
Is there anything you have
515
00:18:01,823 --> 00:18:03,139
been embarrassed to tell me?
516
00:18:03,157 --> 00:18:04,565
Why were you embarrassed?
517
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,066
[laughs]
518
00:18:06,086 --> 00:18:07,585
I can give you something
from high school.
519
00:18:07,812 --> 00:18:12,315
The seniors always
hold this prank
520
00:18:12,408 --> 00:18:14,592
on, like, the new students.
521
00:18:14,743 --> 00:18:16,319
Specifically, the girls.
522
00:18:16,337 --> 00:18:18,154
So this girl was like,
"You started your period."
523
00:18:18,247 --> 00:18:19,338
And I was like, "Oh, my God!"
524
00:18:19,490 --> 00:18:21,248
So she was like,
walking behind me,
525
00:18:21,342 --> 00:18:23,175
you know, so nobody sees.
526
00:18:23,328 --> 00:18:25,328
And as I walk into the bathroom,
527
00:18:25,421 --> 00:18:27,346
she, like, moves her bag, right?
528
00:18:27,498 --> 00:18:29,423
- Oh, God.
- And so I, like,
529
00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:31,592
cover really quickly.
530
00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,093
And I, like, sit on the ground
and like--I'm, like,
531
00:18:33,113 --> 00:18:34,428
screaming,
I'm like, "Oh, my God!"
532
00:18:34,447 --> 00:18:35,762
Because I don't want
nobody to see it.
533
00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:37,448
- Right, right, right.
- But it was a joke.
534
00:18:37,675 --> 00:18:38,858
It was a prank,
but I was very embarrassed
535
00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:40,618
in that moment because
everybody crowded around me
536
00:18:40,769 --> 00:18:42,027
and was, like, laughing.
- Right, right.
537
00:18:42,180 --> 00:18:43,028
- And they were like,
"Got you!"
538
00:18:43,123 --> 00:18:44,847
- Were you pissed after?
539
00:18:44,940 --> 00:18:47,625
- I was--I needed a moment.
540
00:18:47,852 --> 00:18:49,127
- Hmm.
541
00:18:49,278 --> 00:18:51,612
All right, let me see.
542
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:53,356
Have I ever told you
the pee-pee boy story?
543
00:18:53,374 --> 00:18:54,615
- [giggles]
544
00:18:54,709 --> 00:18:56,134
- Yo, you're a bully, yo.
545
00:18:56,285 --> 00:18:57,301
Next question.
546
00:18:57,528 --> 00:18:59,028
Nah.
547
00:18:59,046 --> 00:19:00,863
You're a bully.
- Who called you pee-pee boy?
548
00:19:00,882 --> 00:19:02,140
- Nah, I don't like that.
549
00:19:02,367 --> 00:19:04,291
You laughed instantly,
what's up with you?
550
00:19:04,385 --> 00:19:05,885
- [laughs] I'm sorry.
551
00:19:05,979 --> 00:19:07,145
- Why would you laugh--
- It's the way you say it,
552
00:19:07,296 --> 00:19:08,813
"Have I ever told you
the pee-pee boy?"
553
00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:10,206
- Why would
you laugh immediately?
554
00:19:10,299 --> 00:19:11,482
- Because
pee-pee is a funny word.
555
00:19:11,634 --> 00:19:13,300
- But that's what
they call--called me.
556
00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:15,820
- You--okay,
when did you pee on yourself?
557
00:19:15,971 --> 00:19:17,488
- I was six years old.
558
00:19:17,715 --> 00:19:19,064
You know,
like, when you were a kid...
559
00:19:19,159 --> 00:19:20,549
[clears throat]
They used to do story time.
560
00:19:20,568 --> 00:19:22,401
- Mm-mm.
- And story--
561
00:19:22,553 --> 00:19:25,329
We all were sitting down
on the--on the floor.
562
00:19:25,481 --> 00:19:27,740
And the teacher was reading
a story, and I raised my hand
563
00:19:27,892 --> 00:19:29,558
and said "Hey,
I need to use the bathroom."
564
00:19:29,577 --> 00:19:31,502
And she said,
"Wait until the story's over."
565
00:19:31,729 --> 00:19:33,337
- No, she didn't.
- And I'm like, "Miss?"
566
00:19:33,489 --> 00:19:35,064
- [giggles]
- She's just like,
567
00:19:35,157 --> 00:19:37,324
"Mike, stop being disruptive."
568
00:19:37,418 --> 00:19:38,734
So I'm like, "Okay.
569
00:19:38,753 --> 00:19:40,011
Got something for you."
570
00:19:40,162 --> 00:19:42,496
- [laughs]
- So imagine
571
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:45,183
the pee just spreaded,
and all the kids are, like,
572
00:19:45,334 --> 00:19:47,092
standing on the chairs,
standing on the table,
573
00:19:47,245 --> 00:19:48,352
like, "Aw, Mike's pee-pee boy!
574
00:19:48,504 --> 00:19:49,578
Mike pee-pee boy," so.
575
00:19:49,597 --> 00:19:52,172
- [laughing]
576
00:19:52,266 --> 00:19:54,600
- And that's funny.
577
00:19:54,752 --> 00:19:56,419
All right.
[clears throat]
578
00:19:56,437 --> 00:19:58,421
"Tell your partner what your
favorite physical feature
579
00:19:58,439 --> 00:19:59,772
is about them and why?"
580
00:19:59,924 --> 00:20:01,424
- I like your arms.
- Thank you.
581
00:20:01,442 --> 00:20:02,849
♪ ♪
582
00:20:02,944 --> 00:20:04,610
- Just wanna--just--
583
00:20:04,762 --> 00:20:06,186
- [chuckles]
584
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:09,022
- Whoo, child, that's it.
585
00:20:09,042 --> 00:20:11,375
- Your smell.
586
00:20:11,527 --> 00:20:12,618
- [snorts]
- Yeah.
587
00:20:12,770 --> 00:20:13,953
I would say your smell,
for sure.
588
00:20:14,047 --> 00:20:16,939
- [laughs]
589
00:20:16,958 --> 00:20:22,278
- ♪ You can't stop our hearts
from burning out ♪
590
00:20:22,296 --> 00:20:26,465
- ♪ Call me, call me,
call me yours ♪
591
00:20:26,617 --> 00:20:30,286
♪ 'Cause this is
no ordinary love ♪
592
00:20:30,379 --> 00:20:32,396
- Hi!
- Hi, how are you?
593
00:20:32,548 --> 00:20:34,899
- You look beautiful.
- Hello, yo.
594
00:20:35,126 --> 00:20:36,234
- Hi, Steve.
595
00:20:36,385 --> 00:20:37,235
- Would you like
something to drink?
596
00:20:37,386 --> 00:20:38,569
- We have coffee
if you want some.
597
00:20:38,721 --> 00:20:39,720
- We have green tea,
sparkling water.
598
00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:40,738
- You know what, I am great.
- Water.
599
00:20:40,965 --> 00:20:42,298
- You good?
- I'm really good, yeah.
600
00:20:42,391 --> 00:20:44,316
Thank you.
- You're welcome.
601
00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:46,059
- So I'm here
602
00:20:46,153 --> 00:20:50,155
mainly to talk about trust
and intimacy and connection.
603
00:20:50,308 --> 00:20:52,250
It sounds like
y'all have created
604
00:20:52,401 --> 00:20:54,085
a pretty good bond so far.
605
00:20:54,236 --> 00:20:56,570
Like, right off the bat.
606
00:20:56,664 --> 00:20:57,922
- Yeah.
- I think so.
607
00:20:58,149 --> 00:21:03,319
I think we've done
a pretty good job so far.
608
00:21:03,337 --> 00:21:05,412
- We have a great
physical connection.
609
00:21:05,431 --> 00:21:07,765
We--we hold hands a lot,
we cuddle a lot.
610
00:21:07,916 --> 00:21:09,675
And I feel like we definitely
communicate through that,
611
00:21:09,769 --> 00:21:11,435
you know, I would say.
612
00:21:11,587 --> 00:21:12,995
- And I heard that y'all have
been "enjoying each other."
613
00:21:13,014 --> 00:21:14,921
[both laugh]
614
00:21:14,941 --> 00:21:16,607
- Yeah, we've--yes, we've
had a great time together.
615
00:21:16,759 --> 00:21:18,017
- Okay, great.
616
00:21:18,169 --> 00:21:20,836
Do you all talk about it
amongst each other?
617
00:21:20,929 --> 00:21:21,837
- Intimacy.
- Like, do y'all have that
618
00:21:21,930 --> 00:21:23,188
kind of trust with each other
619
00:21:23,283 --> 00:21:26,025
where you can talk about
intimacy and your needs
620
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:28,193
and what's going well,
what's maybe needs to change
621
00:21:28,346 --> 00:21:30,362
a little bit as you
get to know each other?
622
00:21:30,456 --> 00:21:32,181
- I think for me,
623
00:21:32,199 --> 00:21:34,441
I'm still at the point where
624
00:21:34,460 --> 00:21:37,110
I'm still
getting comfortable with him.
625
00:21:37,130 --> 00:21:39,038
- That carries over
to other places as well.
626
00:21:39,132 --> 00:21:41,190
Like, you know, one other
thing that--that happens
627
00:21:41,208 --> 00:21:42,858
when we're having issues,
sometimes it's hard for her
628
00:21:42,877 --> 00:21:44,376
to verbalize how she feels.
629
00:21:44,529 --> 00:21:46,529
♪ ♪
630
00:21:46,547 --> 00:21:50,457
- When I get upset,
I have a tendency to shut down.
631
00:21:50,476 --> 00:21:52,718
- Which is super scary,
I'm sure, for him.
632
00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:55,646
- For him, yeah.
633
00:21:55,798 --> 00:22:00,042
So our last disagreement, um,
I was really upset.
634
00:22:00,061 --> 00:22:02,394
And I didn't say a word to him.
635
00:22:02,488 --> 00:22:04,897
- What's going on internally
for you when you're--
636
00:22:04,991 --> 00:22:08,141
When you've shut down
and you ha--need that space?
637
00:22:08,235 --> 00:22:12,404
- I--you know, in the past have
lashed out at, like, partners.
638
00:22:12,498 --> 00:22:14,999
And I think I am
639
00:22:15,150 --> 00:22:18,744
so angry that I will just
say things to just hurt them.
640
00:22:18,896 --> 00:22:20,487
- Yikes.
- Whatever I can think of,
641
00:22:20,581 --> 00:22:22,064
I'll--I'll just say,
642
00:22:22,083 --> 00:22:24,416
and I don't want
to say anything to him
643
00:22:24,569 --> 00:22:27,086
that I can't take back.
644
00:22:27,180 --> 00:22:28,995
- What did you learn
about his feelings for you
645
00:22:29,015 --> 00:22:31,682
in all of this?
646
00:22:38,691 --> 00:22:44,344
- I didn't realize, like,
how badly, like, I hurt him
647
00:22:44,364 --> 00:22:46,030
by leaving the way that I did.
648
00:22:46,181 --> 00:22:47,940
- Do you think maybe
you could talk to each other?
649
00:22:48,092 --> 00:22:53,596
♪ ♪
650
00:22:53,689 --> 00:22:55,264
- It just kind of broke my heart
651
00:22:55,282 --> 00:22:56,540
to see you hurt like that.
652
00:22:56,692 --> 00:22:58,601
[sniffles]
653
00:22:58,619 --> 00:23:01,620
So I mean, I know
it's something like obviously,
654
00:23:01,714 --> 00:23:04,715
like, I need to work on.
655
00:23:04,867 --> 00:23:07,610
But, like,
I just, like, don't ever,
656
00:23:07,628 --> 00:23:09,553
like, want to put you
in that situation again.
657
00:23:09,705 --> 00:23:11,630
But also recognizing that, like,
658
00:23:11,782 --> 00:23:13,224
I can't do it, like, overnight.
659
00:23:13,451 --> 00:23:16,635
Like, it's gonna take
a lot for me to get
660
00:23:16,787 --> 00:23:21,123
to a place where I can actually
661
00:23:21,216 --> 00:23:23,626
verbalize it without
being destructive.
662
00:23:23,644 --> 00:23:25,144
[sniffles]
663
00:23:25,296 --> 00:23:27,813
- I know that it's not
gonna be easier overnight.
664
00:23:27,965 --> 00:23:29,465
It's gonna be
challenging for both of us.
665
00:23:29,558 --> 00:23:30,966
But something has to change
666
00:23:30,985 --> 00:23:33,244
because this isn't sustainable
the way it is.
667
00:23:41,087 --> 00:23:42,494
If something upsets you,
tell me right away, I--
668
00:23:42,588 --> 00:23:44,255
You know, I want that.
669
00:23:44,406 --> 00:23:45,589
That at least gives me
the opportunity
670
00:23:45,741 --> 00:23:47,166
to be like, "Okay, look,
you know,
671
00:23:47,318 --> 00:23:48,651
"Why are you upset?
672
00:23:48,669 --> 00:23:51,320
Let me help--how can
I help you not be upset?"
673
00:23:51,338 --> 00:23:54,765
♪ ♪
674
00:23:54,917 --> 00:23:56,992
- Wouldn't you prefer
for him to share with you
675
00:23:57,085 --> 00:23:57,935
the first time
something bugs him?
676
00:23:58,162 --> 00:23:59,662
- Mm-hmm.
677
00:23:59,755 --> 00:24:01,180
- Same thing.
- Yeah.
678
00:24:01,274 --> 00:24:03,590
- So then let's continue
to build that trust
679
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:05,350
in order for you to also be able
680
00:24:05,445 --> 00:24:10,114
to share your criticisms
or concerns or desires.
681
00:24:10,265 --> 00:24:13,266
What would speak to you
to build trust in him?
682
00:24:13,360 --> 00:24:17,846
- I mean, I need, like,
more of, like, a concrete plan.
683
00:24:17,940 --> 00:24:21,033
Like, you know,
he doesn't wanna work.
684
00:24:21,127 --> 00:24:23,368
And I would really, you know,
685
00:24:23,521 --> 00:24:26,522
like to be in a relationship
686
00:24:26,615 --> 00:24:30,801
where we're both
contributing financially.
687
00:24:30,953 --> 00:24:33,862
- You--you doubt that
I'm capable of making money?
688
00:24:33,881 --> 00:24:36,765
♪ ♪
689
00:24:38,460 --> 00:24:40,478
- I don't doubt that, I just...
690
00:24:42,206 --> 00:24:46,041
Ever since I've known you,
like, that hasn't been
691
00:24:46,060 --> 00:24:50,062
something that I've seen.
692
00:24:50,156 --> 00:24:51,137
So I don't know.
693
00:24:51,232 --> 00:24:52,656
- But it--but it--but it hasn't
694
00:24:52,808 --> 00:24:54,307
affected you financially, right?
695
00:24:54,327 --> 00:24:55,493
Because I,
you know, at this point--
696
00:24:55,644 --> 00:24:58,829
- No, but it will, though.
697
00:24:58,981 --> 00:25:00,831
- I'm over here, you know,
698
00:25:00,983 --> 00:25:03,392
cooking, cleaning,
getting the house in order.
699
00:25:03,485 --> 00:25:05,819
Do you like
the benefits of having
700
00:25:05,838 --> 00:25:08,413
these meals and having
this place spotless?
701
00:25:08,508 --> 00:25:11,342
Because if it's so important
for me to get a full-time job,
702
00:25:11,569 --> 00:25:12,993
this place is not
gonna be as clean
703
00:25:13,012 --> 00:25:16,162
and--and the food's
not gonna be as good.
704
00:25:16,182 --> 00:25:19,016
- To me,
it just sounds like excuses.
705
00:25:19,243 --> 00:25:21,835
♪ ♪
706
00:25:21,854 --> 00:25:26,190
I think we could equally
contribute to that.
707
00:25:26,417 --> 00:25:27,841
You know, I don't think
it needs to just be,
708
00:25:27,935 --> 00:25:29,101
like, you do all the housework.
709
00:25:29,195 --> 00:25:32,771
And then I work where,
like, we could both work.
710
00:25:32,923 --> 00:25:35,366
- See--and now this requires
faith on my part,
711
00:25:35,517 --> 00:25:36,700
because I've been
doing these things
712
00:25:36,852 --> 00:25:38,093
and I haven't seen that,
you know?
713
00:25:38,186 --> 00:25:39,870
- Mm-hmm.
- Like, I haven't seen us
714
00:25:40,022 --> 00:25:41,613
splitting tasks, you know?
715
00:25:41,707 --> 00:25:44,099
Like--like, part of me is
like, "Well, maybe we should
716
00:25:44,118 --> 00:25:46,435
try that first so that you can
really feel what that's like."
717
00:25:46,453 --> 00:25:48,270
Because what--if I get a job,
there's no going back.
718
00:25:48,289 --> 00:25:50,864
- Would you ever be
okay with him--
719
00:25:50,958 --> 00:25:53,050
If y'all had enough savings,
720
00:25:53,277 --> 00:25:54,626
would you ever be okay
with him being, like,
721
00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:58,113
a stay-at-home husband or dad?
722
00:25:58,206 --> 00:25:59,798
- That's just not what I want.
723
00:25:59,892 --> 00:26:02,893
Or ever envisioned,
like, for my marriage.
724
00:26:03,120 --> 00:26:09,900
♪ ♪
725
00:26:11,645 --> 00:26:16,222
[upbeat music]
726
00:26:16,317 --> 00:26:17,575
- You ready to see Viviana?
727
00:26:17,802 --> 00:26:19,225
- I am.
728
00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:21,394
- She should come more
often so you could clean, huh?
729
00:26:21,488 --> 00:26:23,063
- Don't do that.
- Okay.
730
00:26:23,157 --> 00:26:24,081
- Don't do that.
- [chuckling]
731
00:26:24,308 --> 00:26:25,307
[knock at door]
- Let's not do that.
732
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:27,326
[chuckles]
733
00:26:27,478 --> 00:26:28,827
♪ ♪
734
00:26:28,921 --> 00:26:30,813
- Hi!
- Hello!
735
00:26:30,831 --> 00:26:33,482
- Hi!
- How are you?
736
00:26:33,500 --> 00:26:35,075
♪ ♪
737
00:26:35,094 --> 00:26:36,427
- There he is.
738
00:26:36,578 --> 00:26:38,837
Hi!
- Hello.
739
00:26:38,989 --> 00:26:40,172
It's good to see you.
- [laughs]
740
00:26:40,324 --> 00:26:41,581
It's good to see you too.
741
00:26:41,675 --> 00:26:42,933
Shall we--there you are.
- Yes.
742
00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:44,602
Welcome to our apartment.
- Thank you.
743
00:26:44,753 --> 00:26:46,511
Look at the sign!
- You like that?
744
00:26:46,606 --> 00:26:49,106
- You are so sweet, yes.
745
00:26:49,257 --> 00:26:51,166
Thank y'all so much
for having me.
746
00:26:51,185 --> 00:26:53,335
I'm here to visit y'all
so we can talk more
747
00:26:53,354 --> 00:26:55,520
about intimacy
and how to build trust
748
00:26:55,673 --> 00:26:56,688
and then set you up for
749
00:26:56,841 --> 00:26:59,116
some success
going down the road.
750
00:26:59,343 --> 00:27:01,360
So physically, what have you
been going through?
751
00:27:01,454 --> 00:27:06,181
And where's the trust level
when it comes to intimacy?
752
00:27:06,274 --> 00:27:09,868
- I would say we
aren't very really
753
00:27:10,020 --> 00:27:12,296
physically intimate
in any way, really.
754
00:27:14,358 --> 00:27:16,541
- Any sort of hand-holding
or hugs or kisses?
755
00:27:16,694 --> 00:27:17,635
Cuddling?
- None.
756
00:27:17,862 --> 00:27:19,619
- Okay, why is that?
757
00:27:19,639 --> 00:27:21,639
- Take--let her take the lead
758
00:27:21,790 --> 00:27:23,957
on where we're going physically?
759
00:27:24,051 --> 00:27:25,476
- Did you know that he
was letting you take the lead?
760
00:27:25,627 --> 00:27:27,460
Was that something that
y'all have discussed?
761
00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:30,055
- I told him that I am
762
00:27:30,149 --> 00:27:32,298
someone who has always
763
00:27:32,393 --> 00:27:35,819
had an emotional and mental
connection with someone
764
00:27:35,971 --> 00:27:37,713
before physical came into place.
765
00:27:37,806 --> 00:27:39,214
- That's what you're used to.
766
00:27:39,307 --> 00:27:40,732
- It's not that that's
what I'm used to,
767
00:27:40,885 --> 00:27:41,733
it's just that's what
I prefer as well--
768
00:27:41,827 --> 00:27:43,327
- Oh.
- Is to have
769
00:27:43,554 --> 00:27:45,570
a connection
with somebody's mind
770
00:27:45,665 --> 00:27:48,481
and whatever first
before I give them my body.
771
00:27:48,501 --> 00:27:49,833
And also, if I'm being honest,
772
00:27:50,060 --> 00:27:51,335
if I have no connection
with you,
773
00:27:51,486 --> 00:27:53,245
my vagina
not getting wet for you.
774
00:27:53,397 --> 00:27:55,564
♪ ♪
775
00:27:55,582 --> 00:27:57,341
That's just what it is.
776
00:27:57,568 --> 00:28:00,326
- So you feel like
you haven't gotten to a place
777
00:28:00,346 --> 00:28:02,328
where you even feel connected?
778
00:28:02,423 --> 00:28:06,183
- There are times where
I do feel like it's a moment
779
00:28:06,410 --> 00:28:07,667
or what--you know, like,
we're, like, laying down
780
00:28:07,761 --> 00:28:10,412
or it was like a,
you know, good day.
781
00:28:10,431 --> 00:28:12,247
But if I'm being honest,
I do feel like
782
00:28:12,340 --> 00:28:13,582
there are other times
where I feel like
783
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:15,341
we're just coexisting
at this point.
784
00:28:15,361 --> 00:28:17,695
- Oh, no, that can't feel good.
785
00:28:17,922 --> 00:28:19,780
- And we're
just not communicating.
786
00:28:22,017 --> 00:28:23,759
- Do you think that
that's because
787
00:28:23,777 --> 00:28:25,427
of what was said in the past
788
00:28:25,520 --> 00:28:27,520
or the accusations
that were made?
789
00:28:27,540 --> 00:28:28,539
- Yes.
790
00:28:28,690 --> 00:28:30,523
- You have been aggressive
791
00:28:30,543 --> 00:28:32,100
and your family agreed.
- I've never said--no, no, no.
792
00:28:32,194 --> 00:28:33,711
Aggressive?
I've never used that word.
793
00:28:33,938 --> 00:28:35,771
- So I'm a liar now.
794
00:28:35,864 --> 00:28:37,456
- Are you worried that anytime
795
00:28:37,608 --> 00:28:39,532
you share something
that you don't like
796
00:28:39,552 --> 00:28:41,293
that she's going to deem you
and label you
797
00:28:41,445 --> 00:28:44,204
as aggressive and disrespectful?
798
00:28:44,223 --> 00:28:45,723
- Yes.
799
00:28:45,950 --> 00:28:48,392
The comfortability level
of just reaching out
800
00:28:48,543 --> 00:28:51,377
and to speak about anything
just isn't there for me.
801
00:28:51,472 --> 00:28:52,955
- But, like, if I told you
802
00:28:53,048 --> 00:28:54,806
that I genuinely wanted
to start over
803
00:28:54,959 --> 00:28:56,549
and it's not being reciprocated,
804
00:28:56,569 --> 00:28:59,069
there's just so much I can do.
805
00:28:59,221 --> 00:29:00,462
- When I hear her speak and say,
806
00:29:00,555 --> 00:29:02,631
"I'm trying,
but you're doing this.
807
00:29:02,649 --> 00:29:03,799
I'm trying,
but you're doing this."
808
00:29:03,817 --> 00:29:05,391
- Mm-hmm.
809
00:29:05,411 --> 00:29:06,985
- It's like I'm focused on
the issue and she's focused
810
00:29:07,079 --> 00:29:09,246
on how I'm causing the issue.
811
00:29:09,473 --> 00:29:10,322
- That's not what I'm--
- Or maintaining it.
812
00:29:10,474 --> 00:29:11,656
- That's not what
I'm focused on.
813
00:29:11,809 --> 00:29:12,916
- That's what it sounds
like to me, that's--
814
00:29:13,143 --> 00:29:14,234
- She just--we were
talking about communication.
815
00:29:14,253 --> 00:29:15,586
- You're saying you're trying.
816
00:29:15,813 --> 00:29:16,920
- Yes, so have you said--
- Exactly, but what I'm--
817
00:29:17,072 --> 00:29:18,571
- Can you say that you
have tried to talk to me?
818
00:29:18,665 --> 00:29:20,758
- When do I get
to finish a thought?
819
00:29:20,909 --> 00:29:25,153
- Okay, well, you did stop
talking and so I continued on.
820
00:29:25,247 --> 00:29:27,431
So finish your thought, Michael.
821
00:29:27,658 --> 00:29:28,824
- I can say
822
00:29:28,917 --> 00:29:31,176
100% each time
that we have a conflict--
823
00:29:31,270 --> 00:29:32,436
- Not about conflict,
824
00:29:32,663 --> 00:29:33,678
we're talking about
normal communication.
825
00:29:33,831 --> 00:29:35,272
- But that's part
of communication.
826
00:29:35,423 --> 00:29:36,607
It's conflict resolution.
- Well, right now, we're just
827
00:29:36,834 --> 00:29:37,849
focusing on the communication
and getting back
828
00:29:38,002 --> 00:29:39,184
to just talking
on a normal day-to-day.
829
00:29:39,336 --> 00:29:40,502
- I don't--I don't know
where we're headed--
830
00:29:40,595 --> 00:29:41,520
- Okay, so then
let's break this down.
831
00:29:41,614 --> 00:29:44,189
Let's break this down.
832
00:29:44,283 --> 00:29:46,525
This is part of
a communication breakdown.
833
00:29:46,677 --> 00:29:48,202
So let's start over.
834
00:29:50,438 --> 00:29:52,347
- Do you feel like
I've taken ownership
835
00:29:52,366 --> 00:29:55,534
of the things that
I need to work on?
836
00:29:55,628 --> 00:29:57,795
- I think you're so stuck
on taking ownership of stuff.
837
00:29:58,022 --> 00:30:00,038
And I'm not
838
00:30:00,132 --> 00:30:04,192
holding anything that happened
in the past against us.
839
00:30:04,286 --> 00:30:06,711
My problem is just I feel like
840
00:30:06,864 --> 00:30:08,621
I'm the one that's really trying
841
00:30:08,641 --> 00:30:11,199
and putting in
more of the effort.
842
00:30:11,293 --> 00:30:12,792
- That's huge because
that means that
843
00:30:12,886 --> 00:30:15,053
you do have some trust for him.
844
00:30:15,205 --> 00:30:17,039
- Hearing that, yeah,
it makes me feel like
845
00:30:17,132 --> 00:30:18,890
you're giving me
the benefit of the doubt.
846
00:30:18,984 --> 00:30:21,801
But I still don't know
how to communicate without it
847
00:30:21,821 --> 00:30:25,380
seeming--as I'm seeing it
in a disrespectful manner.
848
00:30:25,473 --> 00:30:26,806
- Journaling is a really
great way
849
00:30:26,900 --> 00:30:30,052
to release a lot of concerns
or fears.
850
00:30:30,145 --> 00:30:31,570
Is there any way you
could journal it
851
00:30:31,722 --> 00:30:33,163
and then maybe share it
with her?
852
00:30:33,390 --> 00:30:35,332
- Yeah.
- And the other thing is,
853
00:30:35,483 --> 00:30:38,076
creating that safe space
because this is where trust
854
00:30:38,170 --> 00:30:39,911
and intimacy can grow.
855
00:30:40,064 --> 00:30:41,746
♪ ♪
856
00:30:41,841 --> 00:30:45,843
With the intimacy piece,
857
00:30:46,070 --> 00:30:47,919
do y'all want to get
to that place where you are
858
00:30:48,013 --> 00:30:50,514
hugging, kissing freely?
859
00:30:50,741 --> 00:30:52,257
- For sure.
860
00:30:52,409 --> 00:30:53,851
- And tell her why.
861
00:30:54,002 --> 00:30:54,852
- I feel like...
862
00:30:56,522 --> 00:30:58,597
I was hoping that, like,
if we get closer physically,
863
00:30:58,691 --> 00:31:00,749
and I'm not talking about sex.
864
00:31:00,767 --> 00:31:03,026
Just a little more intimate,
if we get a little more closer,
865
00:31:03,253 --> 00:31:05,270
we can get more
of an emotional connection.
866
00:31:05,364 --> 00:31:07,756
That deep, deep spark.
867
00:31:07,849 --> 00:31:09,424
- When I feel like
we're speaking more
868
00:31:09,443 --> 00:31:12,035
and we're getting
a better connection,
869
00:31:12,187 --> 00:31:14,520
then I want to do
those things as well.
870
00:31:14,615 --> 00:31:18,100
Kiss you, cuddle you, you know,
871
00:31:18,193 --> 00:31:20,118
or whatever comes after that.
- Mm-hmm.
872
00:31:20,270 --> 00:31:25,123
♪ ♪
873
00:31:25,275 --> 00:31:27,033
- Hold on,
you were just smiling.
874
00:31:27,052 --> 00:31:27,959
Is she kissable?
875
00:31:28,053 --> 00:31:29,945
- Look at her.
876
00:31:29,963 --> 00:31:32,948
- Aww, your eyes
are smiling now.
877
00:31:33,041 --> 00:31:35,784
I absolutely believe
you can work through this.
878
00:31:35,802 --> 00:31:40,230
- ♪ Every single step
I take brings me closer ♪
879
00:31:44,737 --> 00:31:47,646
- ♪ Can't stop our hearts
from burning out ♪
880
00:31:47,740 --> 00:31:49,055
[meowing]
881
00:31:49,074 --> 00:31:50,632
- Oh.
882
00:31:50,651 --> 00:31:52,409
She's awake.
883
00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:54,227
What is that, catnip?
884
00:31:54,246 --> 00:31:55,820
Now what is the catnip
supposed to do?
885
00:31:55,973 --> 00:31:57,822
- I dunno, make them crazy.
886
00:31:57,975 --> 00:31:59,899
♪ ♪
887
00:31:59,993 --> 00:32:02,477
- And here comes JC.
888
00:32:02,570 --> 00:32:04,070
- They're getting along, though.
889
00:32:04,089 --> 00:32:05,330
- I mean, when it comes to food,
890
00:32:05,424 --> 00:32:07,591
I feel like they just eat
and they don't really
891
00:32:07,742 --> 00:32:09,651
get territorial.
892
00:32:09,670 --> 00:32:11,077
- That's nice that they don't.
- I'm curious how this exit is
893
00:32:11,096 --> 00:32:12,320
with those two.
894
00:32:12,339 --> 00:32:14,765
- Do you think Viv's
allergic to cats?
895
00:32:14,916 --> 00:32:16,174
- Could like-- [knock at door]
896
00:32:16,326 --> 00:32:17,492
Oh, the door.
- I'll get it.
897
00:32:17,511 --> 00:32:18,660
- You wanna get it?
- Yeah, I'll get it.
898
00:32:18,753 --> 00:32:20,270
- Dr. Viviana is
coming over today
899
00:32:20,497 --> 00:32:22,940
to talk to me and Lindsey,
and I'm not quite sure
900
00:32:23,091 --> 00:32:25,000
how it's gonna go.
901
00:32:25,018 --> 00:32:26,168
- Hey.
- Hi!
902
00:32:26,261 --> 00:32:27,686
- Welcome, you look so nice.
903
00:32:27,780 --> 00:32:29,095
- You do, too.
904
00:32:29,189 --> 00:32:30,614
- But I hope it goes
905
00:32:30,841 --> 00:32:32,282
in a very loving, nurturing way.
906
00:32:32,434 --> 00:32:33,617
- Good to see y'all!
- Good to see you.
907
00:32:33,768 --> 00:32:35,601
- And all the felines.
908
00:32:35,621 --> 00:32:37,437
- Not about something
that we're not doing
909
00:32:37,531 --> 00:32:40,682
that often that I feel like
we're gonna talk about.
910
00:32:40,775 --> 00:32:42,184
[chuckling]
- Okay, guys.
911
00:32:42,202 --> 00:32:43,585
I'll let you start for once.
912
00:32:46,707 --> 00:32:48,131
- Not that she wouldn't just
913
00:32:48,358 --> 00:32:49,541
go right in, anyway.
- Yeah, oh, yeah.
914
00:32:49,635 --> 00:32:52,527
- Okay, how do you feel
about your marriage?
915
00:32:52,546 --> 00:32:54,529
♪ ♪
916
00:32:54,548 --> 00:32:56,531
- [clears throat]
917
00:32:56,550 --> 00:33:00,978
[both laughing]
918
00:33:01,205 --> 00:33:02,479
No.
919
00:33:02,706 --> 00:33:04,797
- We're never getting
through this.
920
00:33:04,817 --> 00:33:05,965
Okay.
921
00:33:06,059 --> 00:33:08,543
As of--as of this moment.
922
00:33:08,636 --> 00:33:09,820
- Oh, it's so hard
to look at him
923
00:33:09,971 --> 00:33:11,896
'cause he makes me
laugh so hard.
924
00:33:11,991 --> 00:33:14,658
- Mark, how do you feel
about your marriage?
925
00:33:14,809 --> 00:33:19,387
- I think it's been, um,
a interesting three weeks
926
00:33:19,406 --> 00:33:20,889
of getting to know somebody.
927
00:33:20,907 --> 00:33:22,390
- Yeah, I mean,
928
00:33:22,409 --> 00:33:24,743
I knew that there could be
fireworks between y'all.
929
00:33:24,895 --> 00:33:27,412
I did not think that
they would get so bad.
930
00:33:27,564 --> 00:33:28,730
♪ ♪
931
00:33:28,749 --> 00:33:29,898
- I just need a moment, please.
932
00:33:29,916 --> 00:33:31,157
- What do you want me to do?
933
00:33:31,176 --> 00:33:33,159
- Just don't talk to me,
that's what I mean.
934
00:33:33,178 --> 00:33:34,511
- No problem.
935
00:33:34,738 --> 00:33:35,737
I'm good, I'm good.
- That's what I thought.
936
00:33:35,830 --> 00:33:37,255
Walk away.
- Okay, okay.
937
00:33:37,349 --> 00:33:38,590
- Call your mom, see if
she can let you in tonight.
938
00:33:38,684 --> 00:33:40,166
- Have another drink.
939
00:33:40,260 --> 00:33:41,743
Have another drink.
940
00:33:41,762 --> 00:33:43,578
- I'm telling you that
I'm not satisfied.
941
00:33:43,597 --> 00:33:44,929
- Okay.
- Right now,
942
00:33:45,082 --> 00:33:46,005
and I'm very unhappy.
- Same, same, same.
943
00:33:46,025 --> 00:33:47,691
You're not aware of what you say
944
00:33:47,918 --> 00:33:49,008
and I'm not aware sometimes
of what I say.
945
00:33:49,028 --> 00:33:50,935
And that's the problem.
- Why am I here?
946
00:33:51,088 --> 00:33:52,604
Wha--what do you like about me?
947
00:33:52,698 --> 00:33:54,272
Because it doesn't seem
like there's anything.
948
00:33:54,424 --> 00:33:58,260
♪ ♪
949
00:33:58,278 --> 00:34:00,262
- I don't want y'all
to ever experience that
950
00:34:00,355 --> 00:34:02,614
from each other again,
or from anyone,
951
00:34:02,708 --> 00:34:04,115
for that matter.
952
00:34:04,209 --> 00:34:06,284
And that's why I think
it's really important
953
00:34:06,436 --> 00:34:09,862
that my coming here to really
talk about trust and intimacy
954
00:34:09,882 --> 00:34:13,533
will propel you, I hope,
955
00:34:13,552 --> 00:34:17,112
to leave that part
of your past in the past.
956
00:34:17,205 --> 00:34:18,889
- Mm.
- And to know that you can
957
00:34:19,116 --> 00:34:21,541
never do that
to each other again.
958
00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:22,801
Does that make sense?
959
00:34:22,953 --> 00:34:23,894
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
960
00:34:24,045 --> 00:34:24,803
[clattering]
- Oh!
961
00:34:24,897 --> 00:34:27,213
- Dang.
962
00:34:27,232 --> 00:34:28,456
- Need a napkin?
963
00:34:28,550 --> 00:34:29,307
- Wait, there's one right here.
964
00:34:29,459 --> 00:34:31,401
- Okay.
965
00:34:31,553 --> 00:34:33,628
So what's going on?
966
00:34:33,647 --> 00:34:35,647
Tell me about the trajectory
of your sex life.
967
00:34:35,741 --> 00:34:36,907
- So the way--
968
00:34:39,578 --> 00:34:44,472
- I mean, what I'm seeing is,
whoo, zigzag up and down.
969
00:34:44,491 --> 00:34:47,084
- Let's see, on our
wedding night, he was like,
970
00:34:47,235 --> 00:34:48,752
"I'm gonna make you feel
971
00:34:48,903 --> 00:34:51,813
"so cared for and loved for
in ways you've never imagined.
972
00:34:51,906 --> 00:34:53,498
I'm gonna treat you so well."
973
00:34:53,650 --> 00:34:55,575
And we were really firing
on all cylinders.
974
00:34:55,594 --> 00:34:58,837
- Mm-hmm.
- And he and I were intimate
975
00:34:58,931 --> 00:35:00,079
the next day.
976
00:35:00,099 --> 00:35:01,489
And it was going well.
977
00:35:01,508 --> 00:35:03,082
And then,
like, two days later again,
978
00:35:03,102 --> 00:35:04,659
he's like, "Ah, the
second time didn't feel good.
979
00:35:04,678 --> 00:35:06,661
I'm not sure," and I was like--
980
00:35:06,754 --> 00:35:07,829
- The second time y'all had sex?
981
00:35:07,848 --> 00:35:08,830
- That's what he said to me.
982
00:35:08,849 --> 00:35:09,831
"It just didn't feel right."
983
00:35:09,850 --> 00:35:11,608
- Is--is that what happened?
984
00:35:11,835 --> 00:35:13,184
Help me to understand
what happened
985
00:35:13,337 --> 00:35:14,111
and what's going on for you.
- Yeah, me too,
986
00:35:14,262 --> 00:35:15,170
I would love to know.
987
00:35:15,263 --> 00:35:16,504
- Yes, I said those things.
988
00:35:16,523 --> 00:35:18,022
I felt really close to you
989
00:35:18,175 --> 00:35:18,949
and really comfortable with you,
990
00:35:19,100 --> 00:35:20,600
and it felt really real.
991
00:35:20,619 --> 00:35:21,934
So when we were laying down,
and it felt really good
992
00:35:21,954 --> 00:35:23,954
and I felt really comfortable,
993
00:35:24,181 --> 00:35:27,106
I made a move and yes,
we got intimate.
994
00:35:27,126 --> 00:35:28,683
- And how was it?
995
00:35:28,776 --> 00:35:30,127
- I--I thought it was great.
996
00:35:30,278 --> 00:35:32,020
- Did you like it?
997
00:35:32,038 --> 00:35:35,357
♪ ♪
998
00:35:35,450 --> 00:35:37,116
- Wasn't bad for the first time.
999
00:35:37,136 --> 00:35:39,136
- Okay.
- It wasn't really satisfying.
1000
00:35:39,363 --> 00:35:42,046
- Okay, but it was--
It wasn't bad.
1001
00:35:42,141 --> 00:35:44,032
- No, I felt, like, "Oh,
he's really passionate,
1002
00:35:44,050 --> 00:35:45,308
he's romantic."
- Great.
1003
00:35:45,460 --> 00:35:47,477
- "He could probably
handle me."
1004
00:35:47,629 --> 00:35:48,887
Doesn't look like it.
1005
00:35:49,039 --> 00:35:50,129
- Doesn't look like it?
1006
00:35:50,223 --> 00:35:51,539
Lindsey, do you want
1007
00:35:51,633 --> 00:35:53,483
to have
a good sex life with him?
1008
00:35:53,710 --> 00:35:55,226
- Yeah.
- Okay, then you need to not
1009
00:35:55,379 --> 00:35:58,563
be so rude
when you're talking about it.
1010
00:35:58,715 --> 00:35:59,898
- It's so hard, Viv.
1011
00:35:59,992 --> 00:36:03,493
Like, I feel like
we've been--I've been trying
1012
00:36:03,645 --> 00:36:04,810
to talk to you
about this forever.
1013
00:36:04,830 --> 00:36:06,388
- Are you saying it's hard
to not be rude?
1014
00:36:06,406 --> 00:36:08,981
- No, it's so hard
to talk to him about this.
1015
00:36:09,001 --> 00:36:11,334
It's like,
"Well, I threw my towel in.
1016
00:36:11,486 --> 00:36:12,744
I give up," you know?
1017
00:36:12,896 --> 00:36:14,654
- So you don't get to give up
in a marriage,
1018
00:36:14,673 --> 00:36:16,673
you get to say, "Hey, we
haven't figured this out yet.
1019
00:36:16,824 --> 00:36:18,008
"But it's still important to me,
1020
00:36:18,159 --> 00:36:19,401
"I still need this.
1021
00:36:19,419 --> 00:36:21,085
And I still
wanna talk about this."
1022
00:36:21,238 --> 00:36:22,587
So let's figure out
1023
00:36:22,739 --> 00:36:25,164
what would need to happen
for both of you
1024
00:36:25,184 --> 00:36:27,425
'cause this is
both of your sex life.
1025
00:36:27,577 --> 00:36:29,761
What would make sense
for both of you in order
1026
00:36:29,855 --> 00:36:33,190
to behave in ways and treat
each other in ways
1027
00:36:33,417 --> 00:36:35,250
and work on the connection
in ways to where
1028
00:36:35,343 --> 00:36:37,585
physical intimacy makes sense?
1029
00:36:37,604 --> 00:36:41,089
Now, do you trust each other
enough to give each other
1030
00:36:41,107 --> 00:36:42,199
the benefit
of the doubt at this point?
1031
00:36:42,426 --> 00:36:44,759
Or are you
still working towards it?
1032
00:36:44,778 --> 00:36:47,204
- I think I trust Mark,
I'm not sure Mark trusts me.
1033
00:36:47,355 --> 00:36:50,281
- I've never not trusted you,
I feel that you don't trust me.
1034
00:36:50,375 --> 00:36:53,359
- That's not the case,
I definitely trust you.
1035
00:36:53,378 --> 00:36:56,362
- Let's make
a differentiation here.
1036
00:36:56,456 --> 00:36:58,623
Do you trust that you each want
the best for each other?
1037
00:36:58,775 --> 00:37:00,032
- Yes.
1038
00:37:00,052 --> 00:37:03,053
- Yeah, I absolutely
think that about Mark.
1039
00:37:03,280 --> 00:37:06,556
- Do you trust that
you want to be
1040
00:37:06,708 --> 00:37:08,466
more emotionally
and physically intimate
1041
00:37:08,560 --> 00:37:09,726
with each other?
1042
00:37:09,953 --> 00:37:12,287
- I would like that to happen.
- Yes.
1043
00:37:12,380 --> 00:37:14,456
- You both want the same things.
1044
00:37:14,474 --> 00:37:16,066
You both want to be close.
1045
00:37:16,217 --> 00:37:18,401
You both want
to trust even more.
1046
00:37:18,628 --> 00:37:20,478
You both actually do trust
each other even though
1047
00:37:20,630 --> 00:37:21,980
you think you don't.
1048
00:37:22,132 --> 00:37:24,816
That needs to settle
in for a little bit.
1049
00:37:24,968 --> 00:37:26,484
Overall, you trust that
1050
00:37:26,636 --> 00:37:28,394
you want the best
for each other,
1051
00:37:28,488 --> 00:37:30,655
and that you're looking out
for each other's interests.
1052
00:37:30,807 --> 00:37:32,657
Now prove that
you're looking out
1053
00:37:32,809 --> 00:37:34,492
for the marriage's
best interest.
1054
00:37:34,644 --> 00:37:36,144
- Okay.
1055
00:37:36,162 --> 00:37:38,980
- And don't be hurtful.
1056
00:37:39,073 --> 00:37:41,316
Don't make me go like this.
1057
00:37:41,334 --> 00:37:42,759
You know how many times
I was, like, listening
1058
00:37:42,910 --> 00:37:44,669
and watching
and I'm like, "What?"
1059
00:37:44,821 --> 00:37:46,988
Guys.
1060
00:37:47,007 --> 00:37:49,173
You hit really below the belt,
don't do that anymore.
1061
00:37:49,268 --> 00:37:51,326
You can't.
1062
00:37:51,419 --> 00:37:53,177
That can't happen on my watch.
1063
00:37:53,272 --> 00:37:57,232
♪ ♪
1064
00:38:02,614 --> 00:38:06,599
All my veins are running
empty now I'm back with you ♪
1065
00:38:06,618 --> 00:38:08,693
- How do you think
the conversation
1066
00:38:08,787 --> 00:38:10,954
with Dr. Viviana went?
1067
00:38:13,183 --> 00:38:16,942
- I feel like
we talked about a lot.
1068
00:38:16,962 --> 00:38:18,353
That was the first time
that I really heard you say,
1069
00:38:18,371 --> 00:38:20,371
"Well, I feel like you're
not putting effort in."
1070
00:38:20,465 --> 00:38:21,947
Because it's just like,
"Yeah, you can wave that
1071
00:38:21,967 --> 00:38:23,875
ownership flag all you want,
but that's not enough."
1072
00:38:24,027 --> 00:38:25,543
- Mm-hmm.
1073
00:38:25,695 --> 00:38:27,804
I appreciated that she just,
1074
00:38:27,955 --> 00:38:30,381
you know, let us talk
but in a different way.
1075
00:38:30,475 --> 00:38:32,717
Because I feel like what
we need to do moving forward
1076
00:38:32,869 --> 00:38:34,218
is just communicate.
1077
00:38:34,371 --> 00:38:36,646
- Right.
1078
00:38:36,798 --> 00:38:40,391
I think the writing down things
might be a good idea too.
1079
00:38:40,485 --> 00:38:42,968
Because I realize, even when
we're speaking to her,
1080
00:38:42,988 --> 00:38:45,063
we both were not letting
the other person
1081
00:38:45,215 --> 00:38:47,065
finish a full thought.
- That happened twice.
1082
00:38:47,217 --> 00:38:49,233
Please stop trying
to use that as something
1083
00:38:49,386 --> 00:38:50,718
to, like, go off of.
- Okay.
1084
00:38:50,737 --> 00:38:52,904
Whether it happened twice,
three times, one time.
1085
00:38:53,056 --> 00:38:55,223
My point is it happened
more than once.
1086
00:38:55,241 --> 00:38:56,816
- So what does that
have to do with journaling?
1087
00:38:56,835 --> 00:38:59,336
- What I'm saying is
we both have done this
1088
00:38:59,563 --> 00:39:01,153
where we're
cutting each other off.
1089
00:39:01,247 --> 00:39:02,672
So my thought process is,
1090
00:39:02,824 --> 00:39:05,491
if we write things down,
1091
00:39:05,585 --> 00:39:07,569
let the other person get out
everything they want to say
1092
00:39:07,587 --> 00:39:09,737
and then respond to that.
1093
00:39:09,756 --> 00:39:12,998
- I personally don't want to
write that down because I
1094
00:39:13,018 --> 00:39:15,668
have no problem just being
vocal and talking like this.
1095
00:39:15,687 --> 00:39:17,929
But you can
write down your thoughts
1096
00:39:18,081 --> 00:39:20,431
and come to me
with your journal.
1097
00:39:20,525 --> 00:39:23,768
I'm open to listening
to what you journaled about.
1098
00:39:23,920 --> 00:39:25,678
- Okay, but this is our issue.
1099
00:39:25,697 --> 00:39:28,089
Why does it sound like I'm
the one doing the exercise?
1100
00:39:28,108 --> 00:39:30,608
- I think that
that's you in your head.
1101
00:39:30,702 --> 00:39:32,702
- If there's an issue that
we both need to fix,
1102
00:39:32,929 --> 00:39:34,596
we should be doing
the same things
1103
00:39:34,689 --> 00:39:36,114
to help that issue be fixed.
1104
00:39:36,266 --> 00:39:38,116
- I'm not making it a you thing.
1105
00:39:38,268 --> 00:39:40,043
That's what you're taking it as.
1106
00:39:40,270 --> 00:39:41,878
If I'm telling you
I don't need to journal,
1107
00:39:42,105 --> 00:39:43,213
then Michael,
I don't need to journal.
1108
00:39:43,364 --> 00:39:44,363
- I don't need to journal.
1109
00:39:44,383 --> 00:39:46,383
- I'm not done, Michael.
1110
00:39:46,610 --> 00:39:49,127
Why do I need to write
in a journal
1111
00:39:49,279 --> 00:39:50,887
if I'm vocally telling you,
1112
00:39:51,114 --> 00:39:52,722
"Hey, I'm done,
you can speak now."
1113
00:39:54,709 --> 00:39:56,134
- Are you done?
- Yes.
1114
00:39:56,286 --> 00:39:58,711
- So the reason I'm
introducing a new tool
1115
00:39:58,730 --> 00:40:00,788
is 'cause
it hasn't been done yet.
1116
00:40:00,807 --> 00:40:02,290
You--you've shown
time and time again.
1117
00:40:02,308 --> 00:40:03,233
- I'm sorry, can you
give me one second, please?
1118
00:40:03,460 --> 00:40:04,976
- Of course.
1119
00:40:05,128 --> 00:40:10,481
♪ ♪
1120
00:40:10,634 --> 00:40:13,243
[door opens]
1121
00:40:13,394 --> 00:40:14,819
[door closes]
1122
00:40:14,913 --> 00:40:21,751
♪ ♪
1123
00:40:23,313 --> 00:40:25,313
- When Michael and I
are by ourselves,
1124
00:40:25,331 --> 00:40:27,315
the communication goes
right out of the door.
1125
00:40:27,333 --> 00:40:29,575
I'm just saying the same
[bleep] back and forth.
1126
00:40:29,594 --> 00:40:31,819
- Is she okay?
1127
00:40:31,913 --> 00:40:34,097
- So that's why it's frustrating
1128
00:40:34,248 --> 00:40:36,248
'cause I'm saying,
"Let's try it."
1129
00:40:36,268 --> 00:40:39,436
And you keep going back to
"Well, you haven't done it."
1130
00:40:39,587 --> 00:40:42,105
Okay, so I'm saying
let me try it.
1131
00:40:42,256 --> 00:40:44,015
I don't get
why that's not clicking.
1132
00:40:44,167 --> 00:40:45,667
- Okay.
1133
00:40:45,685 --> 00:40:48,093
Let's come back in here,
and let's just talk this out.
1134
00:40:48,113 --> 00:40:49,520
Let's--let's figure this out.
1135
00:40:49,673 --> 00:40:51,355
♪ ♪
1136
00:40:51,508 --> 00:40:52,949
- I feel like he's just
not hearing me out,
1137
00:40:53,176 --> 00:40:55,343
and it's just his way or no way.
1138
00:40:55,436 --> 00:40:57,361
I can't help but feel like
1139
00:40:57,514 --> 00:41:00,364
this is not how it should be
in a marriage.
1140
00:41:00,517 --> 00:41:03,126
I'm getting a little frustrated
1141
00:41:03,353 --> 00:41:07,205
because I'm literally saying
that moving forward,
1142
00:41:07,357 --> 00:41:09,023
I would like to try
a different approach.
1143
00:41:09,042 --> 00:41:10,783
And you're not accepting of it.
1144
00:41:10,802 --> 00:41:13,786
But that's what I would like
to try to see
1145
00:41:13,805 --> 00:41:15,472
if we can have
adult conversations.
1146
00:41:15,699 --> 00:41:17,882
You speak, I speak,
you speak, I speak.
1147
00:41:17,976 --> 00:41:20,702
And that's why I needed
to take a step back
1148
00:41:20,720 --> 00:41:25,297
because you weren't giving that
space and that platform for us
1149
00:41:25,391 --> 00:41:26,649
to just try it out.
1150
00:41:26,876 --> 00:41:29,301
I personally
don't want to journal.
1151
00:41:29,321 --> 00:41:31,488
- I don't give a damn
about journaling.
1152
00:41:31,715 --> 00:41:34,732
I use it as maybe
this can fix the problem.
1153
00:41:34,884 --> 00:41:36,642
So if you're saying
that you want to try
1154
00:41:36,736 --> 00:41:38,644
the, "Are you done?"
1155
00:41:38,663 --> 00:41:41,889
The check ins, we can do that.
1156
00:41:41,908 --> 00:41:44,501
The reason we were going
back and forth is because
1157
00:41:44,652 --> 00:41:47,895
I didn't hear you say
we have another option.
1158
00:41:47,989 --> 00:41:50,673
The biggest thing
was the we part.
1159
00:41:50,825 --> 00:41:52,825
- But even if I didn't say we,
I still thought that
1160
00:41:52,844 --> 00:41:54,493
you weren't giving me
that space to try
1161
00:41:54,513 --> 00:41:55,845
what I wanted to try.
- Right now, I'm telling you.
1162
00:41:55,997 --> 00:41:57,238
You keep going backwards
and saying--you just said--
1163
00:41:57,331 --> 00:41:59,498
- But this just happened
five seconds ago.
1164
00:41:59,518 --> 00:42:02,243
- Okay, five sec--right now,
present tense,
1165
00:42:02,262 --> 00:42:04,762
I'm telling you
eff the journaling,
1166
00:42:04,856 --> 00:42:07,582
we can do it that way.
1167
00:42:07,600 --> 00:42:09,917
♪ ♪
1168
00:42:09,936 --> 00:42:11,252
It's just frustrating,
1169
00:42:11,271 --> 00:42:13,512
talking in circles,
talking in circles,
1170
00:42:13,532 --> 00:42:15,923
until we just
talk past each other
1171
00:42:16,017 --> 00:42:17,349
and make the conflict worse.
1172
00:42:17,369 --> 00:42:19,594
It's hard to open up
to somebody about things
1173
00:42:19,612 --> 00:42:21,538
if it always turn into
some type of disagreement.
1174
00:42:21,765 --> 00:42:24,040
- I think you need
to work on really
1175
00:42:24,191 --> 00:42:26,191
hearing me when I speak.
1176
00:42:26,211 --> 00:42:29,437
- When Jasmina
is pointing fingers,
1177
00:42:29,455 --> 00:42:32,273
it's a constant battle,
it's a constant struggle.
1178
00:42:32,292 --> 00:42:35,443
It becomes
a you against me thing.
1179
00:42:35,461 --> 00:42:39,371
When in--in a marriage,
it should be an us thing.
1180
00:42:39,391 --> 00:42:41,632
If me and Jasmina
can't figure out how
1181
00:42:41,785 --> 00:42:43,801
to resolve
those small conflicts,
1182
00:42:43,953 --> 00:42:46,137
then we're never ever
gonna get to the point
1183
00:42:46,231 --> 00:42:49,640
where we can resolve
bigger issues in our marriage.
1184
00:42:49,734 --> 00:42:50,975
[sighs]
1185
00:42:51,127 --> 00:42:55,905
♪ ♪
1186
00:42:56,057 --> 00:42:59,984
- ♪ Looking out
from the pier ♪
1187
00:43:00,078 --> 00:43:02,320
♪ ♪
1188
00:43:02,414 --> 00:43:04,322
- Just because we're going
through a rough patch
1189
00:43:04,474 --> 00:43:05,807
doesn't mean that I'm not
still gonna put
1190
00:43:05,825 --> 00:43:06,808
effort with our marriage.
1191
00:43:06,901 --> 00:43:08,233
That's a part of marriage.
1192
00:43:08,253 --> 00:43:10,753
I'm being a lot more vulnerable
1193
00:43:10,980 --> 00:43:12,404
than I was in the beginning,
for sure.
1194
00:43:12,424 --> 00:43:13,423
I gotta woo him.
1195
00:43:13,574 --> 00:43:15,425
I'm gonna woo him.
1196
00:43:15,652 --> 00:43:16,667
- Ooh!
1197
00:43:16,820 --> 00:43:18,261
- Hi.
1198
00:43:18,412 --> 00:43:20,913
- Ay, you got my candy.
[laughs]
1199
00:43:20,932 --> 00:43:22,323
- Hi.
1200
00:43:22,342 --> 00:43:23,825
- Ooh.
- So.
1201
00:43:23,843 --> 00:43:24,934
Can you guess what this is?
1202
00:43:25,086 --> 00:43:26,510
- Movie night!
- Yeah.
1203
00:43:26,663 --> 00:43:28,605
- You know I love that.
- Yeah.
1204
00:43:28,756 --> 00:43:31,090
- That is huge to me, wow.
1205
00:43:31,184 --> 00:43:33,443
- When we first moved in here,
I noticed you kept saying,
1206
00:43:33,670 --> 00:43:36,354
like--mentioning,
like, a movie night,
1207
00:43:36,506 --> 00:43:37,780
movie night, movie night.
- Yeah.
1208
00:43:37,932 --> 00:43:40,191
- And then I feel like
we tried a couple of times.
1209
00:43:40,343 --> 00:43:41,525
- Yes.
- But you know, you work
1210
00:43:41,678 --> 00:43:42,768
and you get home late.
- Yes.
1211
00:43:42,787 --> 00:43:44,028
- And then we try
to watch something.
1212
00:43:44,122 --> 00:43:46,013
- This is perfect.
- And we would fall asleep.
1213
00:43:46,107 --> 00:43:47,790
So I was like, "You know what,
1214
00:43:47,942 --> 00:43:49,441
"it was something
that I remember
1215
00:43:49,461 --> 00:43:50,960
"he kept saying, like,
repetitively
1216
00:43:51,187 --> 00:43:52,629
and it was a movie night."
- Mm-hmm.
1217
00:43:52,780 --> 00:43:53,796
You don't really go out.
- Nope.
1218
00:43:54,023 --> 00:43:55,356
- I'm the going out person.
- Yep.
1219
00:43:55,375 --> 00:43:56,966
- So I figured let's, like,
1220
00:43:57,118 --> 00:43:59,360
have a relaxing night in.
- Yes.
1221
00:43:59,453 --> 00:44:01,028
- And do a movie night together.
1222
00:44:01,047 --> 00:44:03,122
- And I haven't been
to a movie theater since COVID,
1223
00:44:03,216 --> 00:44:04,382
so this is, like, perfect.
1224
00:44:04,534 --> 00:44:05,642
- Yeah.
- This is perfect.
1225
00:44:05,793 --> 00:44:07,551
So we can have
a night in together.
1226
00:44:07,646 --> 00:44:09,628
- We tightening up on my
type of night time now?
1227
00:44:09,648 --> 00:44:11,147
- Yes, and I know you were like,
1228
00:44:11,374 --> 00:44:12,798
"Oh, I gotta stop
eating the candy,"
1229
00:44:12,817 --> 00:44:15,134
but this is the one time I
had to pull out all the candy.
1230
00:44:15,153 --> 00:44:16,486
- This is perfect.
1231
00:44:16,713 --> 00:44:18,062
I'm shocked,
I wouldn't have thought
1232
00:44:18,214 --> 00:44:19,805
you would have thought of that.
1233
00:44:19,899 --> 00:44:21,491
Like, every time we talk about
going out, it's like, out out.
1234
00:44:21,718 --> 00:44:23,401
- Mm-hmm.
- This is my type of going out.
1235
00:44:23,553 --> 00:44:25,903
So this really
means a lot to me.
1236
00:44:26,055 --> 00:44:27,221
It really takes
my breath 'cause, I mean,
1237
00:44:27,240 --> 00:44:28,831
you--you actually listened.
1238
00:44:28,983 --> 00:44:30,725
- Yeah,
of course I listen to you.
1239
00:44:30,743 --> 00:44:32,335
- For real, for real,
that means a lot to me.
1240
00:44:32,486 --> 00:44:33,819
'Cause I
don't care about the world,
1241
00:44:33,838 --> 00:44:35,505
I care about,
like, who I'm with.
1242
00:44:35,656 --> 00:44:36,839
- Mm-hmm.
- That makes a moment.
1243
00:44:36,991 --> 00:44:37,990
- Yeah, I know that.
1244
00:44:38,009 --> 00:44:39,567
- Oh, this means a lot to me.
1245
00:44:39,660 --> 00:44:41,752
Thank you.
- You're welcome.
1246
00:44:41,846 --> 00:44:43,404
- You look great, too.
1247
00:44:43,423 --> 00:44:45,740
- Thank you.
1248
00:44:45,758 --> 00:44:47,666
[both laugh]
1249
00:44:47,686 --> 00:44:49,260
- You're sexy.
1250
00:44:49,354 --> 00:44:52,246
So I'm definitely happy.
1251
00:44:52,265 --> 00:44:54,582
I'm happy I got to see
this side of you
1252
00:44:54,600 --> 00:44:57,009
and see that you can hear me
1253
00:44:57,103 --> 00:44:58,769
even when--at my worst moments.
1254
00:44:58,863 --> 00:45:00,087
- Mm-hmm.
1255
00:45:00,181 --> 00:45:01,013
- And you know that I mean well,
1256
00:45:01,032 --> 00:45:02,865
for real.
- Yeah, of course.
1257
00:45:03,017 --> 00:45:04,183
You have a big heart.
1258
00:45:04,202 --> 00:45:06,185
You're really a softy
on the inside.
1259
00:45:06,204 --> 00:45:08,371
For all that hard stuff,
you soft.
1260
00:45:08,598 --> 00:45:10,281
- Soft for you,
soft for you, for real.
1261
00:45:10,433 --> 00:45:11,449
- [giggles]
1262
00:45:11,601 --> 00:45:13,376
I'm happy, I can't stop smiling
1263
00:45:13,527 --> 00:45:15,786
that I really brought joy
to him.
1264
00:45:15,939 --> 00:45:17,271
Just knowing that
I hit something
1265
00:45:17,290 --> 00:45:18,940
right on the nail for him
1266
00:45:19,033 --> 00:45:21,033
that he, like, actually enjoys.
1267
00:45:21,127 --> 00:45:23,444
That was the best part just
knowing that I got it right.
1268
00:45:23,463 --> 00:45:25,722
- You know what I love
about us is that you could
1269
00:45:25,949 --> 00:45:27,798
be yourself
and I could be myself.
1270
00:45:27,951 --> 00:45:30,209
Like, yeah, I look like I work
out all day, but I eat candy.
1271
00:45:30,228 --> 00:45:31,786
- Well, you do work out.
- I know, I know.
1272
00:45:31,804 --> 00:45:33,454
[both laugh]
1273
00:45:33,473 --> 00:45:35,732
But I got to eat candy.
I could drink juice.
1274
00:45:35,883 --> 00:45:37,883
I don't gotta fake sip champagne
1275
00:45:37,902 --> 00:45:39,643
to make you happy
or feel like an adult.
1276
00:45:39,796 --> 00:45:41,070
- Mm-hmm.
1277
00:45:41,297 --> 00:45:42,221
- You know, my husband,
he holds you down
1278
00:45:42,240 --> 00:45:43,740
as an adult and as a husband.
1279
00:45:43,891 --> 00:45:45,408
- Mm-hmm.
- So it's cool for me.
1280
00:45:45,635 --> 00:45:46,984
Like, this is nice,
this is nice.
1281
00:45:47,078 --> 00:45:50,154
I really feel like I got
so much off my shoulder
1282
00:45:50,248 --> 00:45:52,397
and that it's nice that
you can take control.
1283
00:45:52,417 --> 00:45:54,158
It's like a whole new beginning.
1284
00:45:54,252 --> 00:45:55,585
I love it.
1285
00:45:55,812 --> 00:45:57,661
I love it, love it,
love it, seriously.
1286
00:45:57,756 --> 00:45:59,422
You're showing emotions
through your actions.
1287
00:45:59,573 --> 00:46:01,315
This is what
I was talking about.
1288
00:46:01,334 --> 00:46:02,500
- I told you I got you.
1289
00:46:02,652 --> 00:46:04,076
- I know, but now I'm seeing it
1290
00:46:04,095 --> 00:46:06,487
that I--words is cool.
1291
00:46:06,580 --> 00:46:07,671
People have let me
down so many times.
1292
00:46:07,824 --> 00:46:08,931
- Yeah.
1293
00:46:09,158 --> 00:46:11,768
- And this--
You have not let me down.
1294
00:46:11,919 --> 00:46:14,011
This is what I needed,
seriously.
1295
00:46:14,163 --> 00:46:15,846
♪ ♪
1296
00:46:15,999 --> 00:46:17,181
Movie time.
1297
00:46:17,333 --> 00:46:19,108
[both laugh]
1298
00:46:23,097 --> 00:46:25,448
All I ever wanted
was someone ♪
1299
00:46:25,599 --> 00:46:28,359
♪ To hold my hand ♪
1300
00:46:28,453 --> 00:46:30,286
♪ ♪
1301
00:46:31,681 --> 00:46:33,197
- [giggles]
1302
00:46:33,291 --> 00:46:35,607
♪ ♪
1303
00:46:35,627 --> 00:46:38,035
I just love
a good Nerf gun fight.
1304
00:46:38,187 --> 00:46:40,871
I think I've loved a Nerf
gun fight since I was a kid.
1305
00:46:41,024 --> 00:46:42,857
[whispering]
Don't narc on me!
1306
00:46:42,875 --> 00:46:44,208
It's a great way to get out
some aggression
1307
00:46:44,302 --> 00:46:46,803
and tension when things
are stressing you out
1308
00:46:46,954 --> 00:46:49,305
and another great way
to have some fun.
1309
00:46:54,145 --> 00:46:55,553
- What?
1310
00:46:55,705 --> 00:46:57,555
There's a better weapon hidden?
1311
00:46:57,649 --> 00:46:59,965
"Good luck, the wife."
1312
00:46:59,984 --> 00:47:01,984
- And I feel like he needs
to let loose a little bit.
1313
00:47:02,211 --> 00:47:03,969
- I don't know how
to use this thing.
1314
00:47:03,988 --> 00:47:05,229
- I'm gonna win.
1315
00:47:05,381 --> 00:47:07,398
I don't take loss as an option.
1316
00:47:07,550 --> 00:47:08,991
♪ ♪
1317
00:47:12,221 --> 00:47:13,404
- Oh, jeez!
1318
00:47:13,498 --> 00:47:14,905
[Nerf gunfire]
1319
00:47:15,058 --> 00:47:16,315
♪ ♪
1320
00:47:16,334 --> 00:47:17,316
- [giggling]
- All right, I shot you!
1321
00:47:17,335 --> 00:47:19,060
Okay, you lost!
1322
00:47:19,078 --> 00:47:20,244
You really--
1323
00:47:20,338 --> 00:47:23,080
- I think I won.
1324
00:47:23,232 --> 00:47:25,399
You get
a five second head start!
1325
00:47:25,418 --> 00:47:26,734
- ♪ Running from you wasting ♪
- Ow, you're--you're cheating!
1326
00:47:26,827 --> 00:47:28,493
- ♪ In my parents' basement ♪
1327
00:47:28,588 --> 00:47:30,012
♪ Bubblegum and braces ♪
1328
00:47:30,164 --> 00:47:31,922
- She's got some
crazy laugh to her.
1329
00:47:32,016 --> 00:47:33,407
- [laughs]
1330
00:47:33,426 --> 00:47:34,909
- And then you put
a gun in her hand.
1331
00:47:34,927 --> 00:47:36,427
And I think she really
might try and kill me tonight!
1332
00:47:36,521 --> 00:47:37,854
- [laughs]
1333
00:47:38,005 --> 00:47:39,504
- ♪ Gracious ♪
1334
00:47:39,524 --> 00:47:43,025
♪ I'm outrageous ♪
1335
00:47:43,252 --> 00:47:46,103
♪ Our love, love,
love is a movie ♪
1336
00:47:46,255 --> 00:47:48,105
♪ And baby, I'm the star ♪
1337
00:47:48,199 --> 00:47:49,273
♪ I'm outrageous ♪
1338
00:47:49,425 --> 00:47:51,609
- Jeez.
1339
00:47:51,703 --> 00:47:53,777
She's pretty serious, I mean,
this is, like,
1340
00:47:53,872 --> 00:47:55,187
not even a game.
1341
00:47:55,206 --> 00:47:56,355
This is, like,
I'm gonna shoot you.
1342
00:47:56,374 --> 00:47:58,541
Like.
1343
00:47:58,692 --> 00:48:00,692
This thing's broken!
1344
00:48:00,786 --> 00:48:01,860
Ah!
- [laughs]
1345
00:48:01,880 --> 00:48:03,454
[knock at door]
1346
00:48:03,606 --> 00:48:04,788
- All right, go get the door,
put the guns away.
1347
00:48:04,941 --> 00:48:06,107
- Time out.
1348
00:48:06,200 --> 00:48:07,458
- I mean, with so much going on,
1349
00:48:07,610 --> 00:48:09,460
it's nice to come home
and have a playful night
1350
00:48:09,612 --> 00:48:11,053
of fun and Nerf fights
1351
00:48:11,280 --> 00:48:13,447
and just
enjoy each other's company.
1352
00:48:13,466 --> 00:48:14,873
- Oh, no.
1353
00:48:14,967 --> 00:48:16,375
Oh, no.
- Oh, gosh.
1354
00:48:16,394 --> 00:48:18,210
Oh, I saw something about penis.
1355
00:48:18,229 --> 00:48:20,229
- I saw something
that's a candy G-string,
1356
00:48:20,456 --> 00:48:22,139
and I'm pretty sure
it's for you.
1357
00:48:22,291 --> 00:48:23,882
♪ ♪
1358
00:48:23,902 --> 00:48:26,143
"Mark and Lindsey.
1359
00:48:26,237 --> 00:48:27,904
"You're receiving this basket
because we want you
1360
00:48:28,055 --> 00:48:30,147
"to have fun together
as you focus
1361
00:48:30,299 --> 00:48:32,241
"on trust and intimacy
this week.
1362
00:48:32,393 --> 00:48:34,485
"We urge you to push past
any uncomfortable feelings
1363
00:48:34,637 --> 00:48:36,654
so you can build intimacy
in your marriage."
1364
00:48:36,806 --> 00:48:39,323
- Physical intimacy is an
important component
1365
00:48:39,417 --> 00:48:41,142
in any marriage,
1366
00:48:41,160 --> 00:48:43,252
especially a new marriage.
1367
00:48:43,404 --> 00:48:45,570
Lindsey and Mark have had
some stumbling blocks
1368
00:48:45,665 --> 00:48:47,072
in that department.
1369
00:48:47,091 --> 00:48:50,151
So we've
given them a gentle nudge,
1370
00:48:50,169 --> 00:48:52,670
which will hopefully send
them in the right direction.
1371
00:48:52,764 --> 00:48:55,414
- "Have some fun this week
and enjoy the goodies."
1372
00:48:55,508 --> 00:48:58,100
"The silent treatment."
1373
00:48:58,252 --> 00:48:59,660
You can read it, babe.
1374
00:48:59,753 --> 00:49:02,346
- "The point of this game
is for Lindsey
1375
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:04,774
to always listen to Mark
and stop talking first."
1376
00:49:05,001 --> 00:49:06,609
I'm just kidding,
it doesn't say that.
1377
00:49:06,836 --> 00:49:08,185
[laughs]
1378
00:49:08,279 --> 00:49:10,095
"The point of this game is
to deepen your connection
1379
00:49:10,114 --> 00:49:11,172
without speaking."
1380
00:49:11,190 --> 00:49:13,007
Oh, that's great.
1381
00:49:13,100 --> 00:49:16,285
Silence is good for me
because sometimes
1382
00:49:16,437 --> 00:49:18,788
there's so much going on that
I like a little quiet time.
1383
00:49:19,015 --> 00:49:21,440
I think with intimacy,
I like it soft
1384
00:49:21,534 --> 00:49:25,519
and romantic and not so...
1385
00:49:25,538 --> 00:49:27,688
[blows air]
1386
00:49:27,707 --> 00:49:29,448
I like a little bit of peace.
1387
00:49:29,467 --> 00:49:32,951
It doesn't happen a lot here.
1388
00:49:32,971 --> 00:49:34,303
- [giggles]
- A ball gag.
1389
00:49:34,455 --> 00:49:35,713
- Yeah, I can't wait.
1390
00:49:35,865 --> 00:49:37,139
You're gonna have noise scares.
1391
00:49:37,366 --> 00:49:38,808
- You're gonna put a ball
in my mouth,
1392
00:49:38,959 --> 00:49:40,125
like, this is--this is--
1393
00:49:40,219 --> 00:49:41,811
- Like a little chew toy.
1394
00:49:42,038 --> 00:49:43,037
Yeah, just be happy
I'm not putting
1395
00:49:43,055 --> 00:49:44,371
a latex suit on you as well.
1396
00:49:44,390 --> 00:49:46,315
- That would never happen!
- [laughs]
1397
00:49:46,542 --> 00:49:47,817
- I'd be forced out of Boston.
- We haven't gotten
1398
00:49:48,044 --> 00:49:50,878
through the whole box yet,
it might be in there.
1399
00:49:50,896 --> 00:49:52,896
- The gag ball?
1400
00:49:53,049 --> 00:49:57,401
Hmm, not so much something
that is for me.
1401
00:49:57,495 --> 00:49:59,887
But it's my wife,
1402
00:49:59,905 --> 00:50:03,482
and I'm trying to show her
we can trust each other.
1403
00:50:03,576 --> 00:50:06,060
Whatever Lindsey wants to do
in the basket, we're gonna do.
1404
00:50:06,078 --> 00:50:08,729
It's what you do
when you get married.
1405
00:50:08,822 --> 00:50:11,248
You get real adventurous
and silly.
1406
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:12,824
Oh, my God.
1407
00:50:12,844 --> 00:50:14,918
[grunts]
- [giggles]
1408
00:50:15,013 --> 00:50:17,329
- [muffled] I can't even
breathe with this thing on.
1409
00:50:17,348 --> 00:50:18,756
Okay.
1410
00:50:18,908 --> 00:50:20,832
Easy there,
you're gonna break a tooth.
1411
00:50:20,852 --> 00:50:22,000
Okay.
1412
00:50:22,094 --> 00:50:23,185
- Open your mouth.
1413
00:50:23,412 --> 00:50:24,928
- I'm gonna,
like, I'm gonna choke.
1414
00:50:25,023 --> 00:50:26,413
- No, open your mouth.
1415
00:50:26,507 --> 00:50:27,857
It goes in there,
it's a ball gag.
1416
00:50:28,008 --> 00:50:29,025
It goes in your mouth.
1417
00:50:29,252 --> 00:50:32,253
- [normally] I'm gonna gag
and choke.
1418
00:50:32,271 --> 00:50:34,438
- Mark looks like
1419
00:50:34,590 --> 00:50:37,366
a pig in a Polynesian buffet
that did not quite
1420
00:50:37,593 --> 00:50:40,928
get the apple stuffed
in his mouth.
1421
00:50:40,946 --> 00:50:42,279
He's like,
1422
00:50:42,373 --> 00:50:45,115
"I fought till the end.
This isn't happening."
1423
00:50:45,268 --> 00:50:47,209
♪ ♪
1424
00:50:47,361 --> 00:50:49,045
- You're all about that.
1425
00:50:52,533 --> 00:50:55,109
- [muffled] Aw, yeah.
1426
00:50:55,127 --> 00:51:00,723
♪ ♪
1427
00:51:00,874 --> 00:51:02,633
[squeals]
- [muffled] You put it on?
1428
00:51:02,785 --> 00:51:05,452
- [laughing]
1429
00:51:05,471 --> 00:51:06,804
How am I gonna put this on?
1430
00:51:06,898 --> 00:51:08,472
- Mm-hmm.
1431
00:51:08,566 --> 00:51:11,049
[laughter]
1432
00:51:11,143 --> 00:51:12,976
- Yeah, yeah, here you go.
1433
00:51:13,129 --> 00:51:15,479
There you go, there you go,
there you go.
1434
00:51:15,573 --> 00:51:16,721
There you go.
1435
00:51:16,741 --> 00:51:17,815
Yeah.
1436
00:51:17,967 --> 00:51:19,633
- [giggling]
- There we go.
1437
00:51:19,726 --> 00:51:21,302
I got this all over my hands.
1438
00:51:21,320 --> 00:51:24,972
- [laughing]
1439
00:51:25,065 --> 00:51:28,158
- You sound like a dolphin.
1440
00:51:28,311 --> 00:51:30,402
- It always feels good
to laugh with Mark.
1441
00:51:30,421 --> 00:51:33,255
That's one of the things
that attracts me to Mark most
1442
00:51:33,407 --> 00:51:35,649
is the fact that
we can literally
1443
00:51:35,668 --> 00:51:38,485
just look at each other
and just laugh.
1444
00:51:38,504 --> 00:51:41,246
But I want what I had
for Mark on the honeymoon
1445
00:51:41,340 --> 00:51:42,673
and on our wedding night.
1446
00:51:42,825 --> 00:51:47,603
I want him to, like, dive in.
1447
00:51:49,273 --> 00:51:51,107
♪ ♪
1448
00:51:51,334 --> 00:51:52,608
- [chuckles]
1449
00:51:52,835 --> 00:51:54,518
- [whispered] So gross.
- [chuckles]
1450
00:51:54,612 --> 00:51:57,521
[both laughing]
1451
00:51:57,673 --> 00:52:02,359
♪ ♪
1452
00:52:02,511 --> 00:52:04,178
- Oh.
1453
00:52:04,196 --> 00:52:05,770
- [muffled] Did you
just drool on me?
1454
00:52:05,790 --> 00:52:07,030
- [muffled] Yes,
I just went for a kiss.
1455
00:52:07,125 --> 00:52:09,533
[both laughing]
1456
00:52:09,685 --> 00:52:11,109
♪ ♪
1457
00:52:11,203 --> 00:52:12,870
This is fun to be playful.
1458
00:52:13,022 --> 00:52:14,355
But I'm not thinking,
1459
00:52:14,373 --> 00:52:16,448
"Ooh-la-la, let me go
take off your pants."
1460
00:52:16,467 --> 00:52:18,467
I'm just like, "Stop laughing,
1461
00:52:18,619 --> 00:52:19,543
you're scaring me
a little bit."
1462
00:52:19,695 --> 00:52:20,785
Ow.
1463
00:52:20,805 --> 00:52:22,120
No--no force.
1464
00:52:22,140 --> 00:52:23,139
My tooth hurts!
1465
00:52:23,366 --> 00:52:25,532
[both laugh]
1466
00:52:25,551 --> 00:52:27,701
Pick another card, you win.
1467
00:52:27,720 --> 00:52:28,978
- [grunts]
1468
00:52:30,481 --> 00:52:32,297
♪ ♪
1469
00:52:32,316 --> 00:52:33,390
Okay.
1470
00:52:33,542 --> 00:52:34,558
Small words.
1471
00:52:34,652 --> 00:52:35,818
- [grunts]
1472
00:52:35,969 --> 00:52:38,545
[packaging crinkling]
1473
00:52:38,639 --> 00:52:40,322
- Oh, what are you
doing with that?
1474
00:52:40,549 --> 00:52:41,565
Ah.
1475
00:52:41,717 --> 00:52:44,309
- [giggles]
- [muffled] Oh, God.
1476
00:52:44,328 --> 00:52:45,903
It's so sticky.
1477
00:52:46,055 --> 00:52:48,497
♪ ♪
1478
00:52:48,649 --> 00:52:49,481
What are you writing?
1479
00:52:49,575 --> 00:52:53,151
Penis?
- [laughs]
1480
00:52:53,171 --> 00:52:56,821
I'm writing the word driven
on my husband's forehead.
1481
00:52:56,916 --> 00:52:59,733
Because I want him to know
that I really believe in him.
1482
00:52:59,826 --> 00:53:00,901
I think that he's hardworking
1483
00:53:00,994 --> 00:53:03,570
and motivated and capable.
1484
00:53:03,589 --> 00:53:06,515
And what I'm learning
about Mark tonight is that
1485
00:53:06,742 --> 00:53:08,350
even though he may be
closed-minded
1486
00:53:08,577 --> 00:53:10,019
and not interested in
something, he will still
1487
00:53:10,246 --> 00:53:13,096
give it a shot, and that
counts for something.
1488
00:53:13,249 --> 00:53:14,932
- [muffled] Are you having fun?
- [giggling]
1489
00:53:15,026 --> 00:53:18,752
I got a candy G-string,
and I got [bleep] on my head.
1490
00:53:18,845 --> 00:53:20,845
And a ball
in my mouth on my teeth.
1491
00:53:20,865 --> 00:53:22,773
- [muffled] Uh-huh.
- I'm having fun.
1492
00:53:22,925 --> 00:53:24,366
- Uh-huh.
1493
00:53:24,518 --> 00:53:25,776
- [grunts]
1494
00:53:25,928 --> 00:53:27,611
♪ ♪
1495
00:53:27,705 --> 00:53:28,853
[chuckles]
1496
00:53:28,873 --> 00:53:30,431
[groans]
1497
00:53:30,449 --> 00:53:35,118
♪ ♪
1498
00:53:35,271 --> 00:53:36,787
There goes my shirt.
1499
00:53:36,939 --> 00:53:38,272
♪ ♪
1500
00:53:38,290 --> 00:53:39,940
- [giggles]
1501
00:53:39,959 --> 00:53:41,217
Hold on, hold on a second.
1502
00:53:41,368 --> 00:53:43,794
- Where are you going?
1503
00:53:43,946 --> 00:53:46,463
- [giggles]
1504
00:53:46,615 --> 00:53:48,615
- This is what you want
on the refrigerator?
1505
00:53:48,634 --> 00:53:49,800
[camera clicks]
1506
00:53:49,952 --> 00:53:51,635
- Uh-huh.
1507
00:53:51,729 --> 00:53:53,520
I feel relaxed.
1508
00:53:55,808 --> 00:53:57,900
- It looks like he got hazed
1509
00:53:58,051 --> 00:53:59,977
at a college sorority.
1510
00:54:00,129 --> 00:54:02,387
But I'm the one who hazed him!
1511
00:54:02,406 --> 00:54:04,556
[laughs]
1512
00:54:04,650 --> 00:54:07,892
You look sexy as [bleep].
1513
00:54:07,912 --> 00:54:09,912
We gotta add that to the fridge.
1514
00:54:10,063 --> 00:54:12,081
Mark's first ball gag.
1515
00:54:12,232 --> 00:54:13,824
Something to show
the grandkids, you know?
1516
00:54:13,976 --> 00:54:17,644
♪ ♪
1517
00:54:17,738 --> 00:54:19,663
- Nope, this is not for me.
1518
00:54:19,757 --> 00:54:21,382
♪ ♪
1519
00:54:26,413 --> 00:54:28,246
♪ I'm coming way up ♪
1520
00:54:28,340 --> 00:54:29,932
♪ I'm coming way up ♪
1521
00:54:30,083 --> 00:54:31,825
♪ I'm coming way up ♪
1522
00:54:31,844 --> 00:54:33,176
♪ I'm coming way up ♪
1523
00:54:33,329 --> 00:54:34,678
- I'm getting the guys
together for a little
1524
00:54:34,772 --> 00:54:35,938
synthetic ice hockey.
1525
00:54:36,089 --> 00:54:37,664
- That sounds fun.
1526
00:54:37,683 --> 00:54:39,441
At least you guys are
doing something active.
1527
00:54:39,668 --> 00:54:40,759
- You ready to go have
fun with the girls?
1528
00:54:40,853 --> 00:54:42,519
- Yeah.
- Okay.
1529
00:54:42,613 --> 00:54:45,263
- Noi invited all the girls
to do aerial yoga.
1530
00:54:45,283 --> 00:54:47,524
You know what that is?
- Yoga.
1531
00:54:47,676 --> 00:54:48,859
- Yeah, but it's like these--
1532
00:54:49,011 --> 00:54:50,677
- Oh, you're flying, like, the--
1533
00:54:50,771 --> 00:54:51,845
- Yeah.
- I can't imagine y'all.
1534
00:54:51,938 --> 00:54:53,289
- How do you think
me and Jasmina--
1535
00:54:53,440 --> 00:54:54,681
- I'm jealous that I'm not
gonna be there to watch you.
1536
00:54:54,700 --> 00:54:55,774
That's gonna be so funny.
- I feel like I'm
1537
00:54:55,793 --> 00:54:57,034
gonna bust my ass.
1538
00:54:57,186 --> 00:54:58,519
- I think if we can
get home and get out
1539
00:54:58,537 --> 00:55:00,111
of the activity
without getting injured
1540
00:55:00,131 --> 00:55:02,706
or hurting ourselves,
I think it's a win.
1541
00:55:02,858 --> 00:55:04,616
- I can't make no promises.
[both laugh]
1542
00:55:04,635 --> 00:55:06,284
- ♪ Let me hear you say ♪
1543
00:55:06,304 --> 00:55:07,694
- ♪ Bump to the wall
and grind ♪
1544
00:55:07,788 --> 00:55:09,454
- ♪ Let me hear you say ♪
1545
00:55:09,473 --> 00:55:11,532
- ♪ Bump to the wall
and grind ♪
1546
00:55:11,550 --> 00:55:13,142
- Reay to get on the ice?
- Yeah, I'm ready, man.
1547
00:55:13,293 --> 00:55:14,384
- All right, man,
what size are you?
1548
00:55:14,537 --> 00:55:15,811
- I'm 13.
1549
00:55:15,962 --> 00:55:17,220
- ♪ Bump to the wall
and grind ♪
1550
00:55:17,373 --> 00:55:18,797
- ♪ Let me hear you say ♪
1551
00:55:18,816 --> 00:55:20,965
- ♪ Bump to the wall
and grind ♪
1552
00:55:20,985 --> 00:55:22,300
- This is your
once a month workout.
1553
00:55:22,394 --> 00:55:23,986
- Aerial yoga.
- I know.
1554
00:55:24,137 --> 00:55:25,395
- I think sometimes
it's really nice
1555
00:55:25,548 --> 00:55:26,563
to hear from the other wives
1556
00:55:26,715 --> 00:55:27,731
where they're at in the process
1557
00:55:27,883 --> 00:55:29,383
and how they're feeling.
1558
00:55:29,401 --> 00:55:30,826
And it's great to kind of
get both perspectives
1559
00:55:31,053 --> 00:55:32,736
and put it
into perspective, really.
1560
00:55:32,830 --> 00:55:34,071
- Nervous?
1561
00:55:34,223 --> 00:55:35,146
- No.
- Yeah, a little bit.
1562
00:55:35,166 --> 00:55:36,498
- I'm excited.
1563
00:55:36,650 --> 00:55:38,167
- I've done yoga before,
1564
00:55:38,318 --> 00:55:39,576
and I've done
the aerials before,
1565
00:55:39,728 --> 00:55:42,245
so this is right up my alley.
1566
00:55:42,398 --> 00:55:44,231
This is definitely
my cup of tea.
1567
00:55:44,249 --> 00:55:45,674
- All right, first things first
to get started.
1568
00:55:45,901 --> 00:55:47,067
Find yourself
at the top of the mat
1569
00:55:47,160 --> 00:55:49,845
to walk yourself all the way in.
1570
00:55:50,072 --> 00:55:52,163
Push the hammock down,
look to your feet.
1571
00:55:52,257 --> 00:55:53,832
Lift on your tippy toes
1572
00:55:53,851 --> 00:55:56,000
and as you're looking
at your feet, knee to the nose.
1573
00:55:56,020 --> 00:55:58,169
And scoot your way in.
So you want to wiggle a little.
1574
00:55:58,263 --> 00:55:59,429
- [blows raspberry]
1575
00:55:59,523 --> 00:56:00,764
[chuckles]
1576
00:56:00,916 --> 00:56:02,340
I am so nervous about
1577
00:56:02,360 --> 00:56:04,101
getting up on the, like, rope.
1578
00:56:04,253 --> 00:56:05,752
- 'Cause when you're ready,
your left foot is
1579
00:56:05,846 --> 00:56:07,421
gonna go up and over
to the other side.
1580
00:56:07,514 --> 00:56:08,772
- Oh, girl.
- I know it can be
1581
00:56:08,924 --> 00:56:10,014
a little awkward but if
you need to grab...
1582
00:56:10,034 --> 00:56:11,258
- Oh.
1583
00:56:11,351 --> 00:56:12,517
- I'm not
flexible enough for this.
1584
00:56:12,536 --> 00:56:13,944
- Flex your knees,
grab your foot in.
1585
00:56:14,096 --> 00:56:16,096
- I'm 30, I can't move
the way that I used to.
1586
00:56:16,115 --> 00:56:17,539
I need to start stretching,
1587
00:56:17,766 --> 00:56:18,782
working out
with my husband more.
1588
00:56:18,934 --> 00:56:20,267
[laughs]
1589
00:56:20,360 --> 00:56:22,102
- Goes back and then--
- [yelps]
1590
00:56:22,195 --> 00:56:25,381
[laughter]
- You got it.
1591
00:56:25,608 --> 00:56:29,885
- ♪ Yeah, I work out
tip top upside down ♪
1592
00:56:30,036 --> 00:56:35,132
♪ It's your girl got her head
spinning round and around ♪
1593
00:56:35,284 --> 00:56:37,451
- Wider than the hammock,
start to slide your hands down.
1594
00:56:37,544 --> 00:56:39,136
- Whee!
- This is my idea of fun.
1595
00:56:39,230 --> 00:56:40,729
[giggles]
1596
00:56:40,881 --> 00:56:42,305
- Look at that booty,
it's poking.
1597
00:56:42,400 --> 00:56:43,624
- You see it poking?
- You got a nice little booty.
1598
00:56:43,642 --> 00:56:45,216
You do.
1599
00:56:45,236 --> 00:56:46,627
- Okay, I wanna come up.
1600
00:56:46,645 --> 00:56:48,052
- [laughs]
- I need help.
1601
00:56:48,147 --> 00:56:50,464
- I got you, you're fine.
1602
00:56:50,482 --> 00:56:51,740
- Now that Alyssa's not around,
this meetup
1603
00:56:51,892 --> 00:56:53,057
is going really well.
1604
00:56:53,152 --> 00:56:55,152
I think Katina is...
1605
00:56:55,304 --> 00:56:57,154
♪ ♪
1606
00:56:57,306 --> 00:56:59,230
Let's not ruin a good thing.
1607
00:56:59,324 --> 00:57:00,398
We're getting along well.
1608
00:57:00,418 --> 00:57:01,750
I really don't want
to say anything.
1609
00:57:01,977 --> 00:57:04,144
And I hope
that that continues to be
1610
00:57:04,163 --> 00:57:06,088
the progress now that
we've trimmed the fat.
1611
00:57:06,239 --> 00:57:08,165
- ♪ Yo, we like it ♪
- ♪ When we lose ♪
1612
00:57:08,317 --> 00:57:10,484
- ♪ When we lose our minds
- ♪ Our minds ♪
1613
00:57:10,502 --> 00:57:12,986
- Two, one.
1614
00:57:13,079 --> 00:57:15,079
Front sway, drop your knee down.
1615
00:57:15,099 --> 00:57:17,007
- That one butterfly move
where we were, like,
1616
00:57:17,101 --> 00:57:19,601
upside down, legs open,
it did it for me.
1617
00:57:19,753 --> 00:57:21,937
I definitely felt like
I probably broke my coochie,
1618
00:57:22,088 --> 00:57:23,497
I ain't gonna lie.
1619
00:57:23,515 --> 00:57:24,589
Oh, [bleep].
1620
00:57:24,608 --> 00:57:26,108
- You all did it.
1621
00:57:26,259 --> 00:57:27,443
- I probably won't do it again.
1622
00:57:27,594 --> 00:57:29,019
[chuckles]
1623
00:57:29,113 --> 00:57:30,279
- Namaste.
1624
00:57:30,506 --> 00:57:32,172
- And good job
and congratulations
1625
00:57:32,265 --> 00:57:34,450
on your first time being upside
down multiple times in the air.
1626
00:57:34,601 --> 00:57:35,600
- Thank you!
- Yeah, thank you.
1627
00:57:35,619 --> 00:57:36,693
- Thank you, that was so fun.
1628
00:57:36,845 --> 00:57:39,012
♪ ♪
1629
00:57:39,105 --> 00:57:42,199
- So guys, I got some big news.
1630
00:57:42,293 --> 00:57:43,684
I dropped the I word.
1631
00:57:43,702 --> 00:57:44,868
All:
Ooh!
1632
00:57:45,020 --> 00:57:46,019
- I told her I loved her.
1633
00:57:46,038 --> 00:57:47,278
- Ooh.
- Wow.
1634
00:57:47,298 --> 00:57:49,039
- Nice, brother,
that's a special feeling.
1635
00:57:49,133 --> 00:57:50,114
- How did she--how did
she take you saying that?
1636
00:57:50,209 --> 00:57:51,967
- She got up and--and ran
1637
00:57:52,118 --> 00:57:53,210
down--down the beach.
1638
00:57:53,362 --> 00:57:54,470
[chuckling]
1639
00:57:54,621 --> 00:57:56,713
- Jumped on the lifeguard
and came back.
1640
00:57:56,807 --> 00:57:59,049
- No, she--she took it--
She was shocked for a minute,
1641
00:57:59,201 --> 00:58:00,792
and she kind of looked at me
and she's like.
1642
00:58:00,811 --> 00:58:02,536
And then she's like,
"I love you too."
1643
00:58:02,629 --> 00:58:03,979
So it's like, oh.
- That's great.
1644
00:58:04,206 --> 00:58:05,481
- So I took a risk, man,
I took a risk.
1645
00:58:05,632 --> 00:58:06,890
But she--luckily,
she came back with it.
1646
00:58:07,042 --> 00:58:08,058
- Nice, brother.
- Thanks, man.
1647
00:58:08,210 --> 00:58:09,059
- That's great, man.
1648
00:58:09,211 --> 00:58:13,880
♪ ♪
1649
00:58:13,974 --> 00:58:16,492
- Come on, O.
- Wrong way.
1650
00:58:16,643 --> 00:58:20,721
- ♪ Oh, you turn me on ♪
1651
00:58:20,739 --> 00:58:22,906
- Oh, Mike, Mike, Mike!
1652
00:58:23,058 --> 00:58:24,500
- I was too busy fumbling, bro!
1653
00:58:24,727 --> 00:58:26,409
- I got you!
1654
00:58:26,562 --> 00:58:27,986
- So this is my first time
playing hockey.
1655
00:58:28,080 --> 00:58:30,397
I've never even skated before.
1656
00:58:30,415 --> 00:58:34,584
So as expected, I'm not
the greatest at ice hockey.
1657
00:58:34,678 --> 00:58:37,237
- Mike!
1658
00:58:37,256 --> 00:58:38,755
Whoa!
- Ah!
1659
00:58:38,907 --> 00:58:40,073
- [bleep]
1660
00:58:40,092 --> 00:58:40,999
- Oh!
- Steve!
1661
00:58:41,018 --> 00:58:42,259
Steve, clear it!
1662
00:58:42,353 --> 00:58:46,337
♪ ♪
1663
00:58:46,357 --> 00:58:47,839
- Oh, Mike, go!
1664
00:58:47,858 --> 00:58:49,432
- Ah!
1665
00:58:49,527 --> 00:58:51,434
- Mike! Run it!
1666
00:58:51,529 --> 00:58:52,919
Steve, Steve!
1667
00:58:53,013 --> 00:58:56,865
- ♪ Oh my, help me again ♪
1668
00:58:57,092 --> 00:59:01,537
♪ You bring me back
from the end ♪
1669
00:59:01,688 --> 00:59:03,688
- I definitely
took a couple falls.
1670
00:59:03,707 --> 00:59:05,023
I think Olajuwon
took a couple falls.
1671
00:59:05,042 --> 00:59:06,783
I think we took
a couple falls together.
1672
00:59:06,935 --> 00:59:08,785
- Whoa!
1673
00:59:08,937 --> 00:59:10,287
- Oh!
1674
00:59:10,381 --> 00:59:12,548
- I'm coming!
1675
00:59:12,699 --> 00:59:14,608
- [bleep]
- Ah!
1676
00:59:14,626 --> 00:59:16,218
[bleep]
1677
00:59:16,445 --> 00:59:17,460
- You good, you good?
- Yeah, yeah.
1678
00:59:17,613 --> 00:59:18,703
Did that go in?
- Yeah.
1679
00:59:18,722 --> 00:59:20,538
- Okay, good, good, nice shot.
1680
00:59:20,558 --> 00:59:22,115
And luckily,
no one got really hurt.
1681
00:59:22,134 --> 00:59:24,208
- I'm adjusting pretty well
to married life.
1682
00:59:24,303 --> 00:59:25,710
I mean, I'm pretty happy.
1683
00:59:25,804 --> 00:59:27,287
I don't miss dating.
1684
00:59:27,306 --> 00:59:29,047
- Do you guys still
feel like you're,
1685
00:59:29,066 --> 00:59:31,124
like, you're chasing
or being chased?
1686
00:59:31,143 --> 00:59:33,402
- I think that I miss
the chase a little bit.
1687
00:59:33,553 --> 00:59:35,404
But I'd say the thing
1688
00:59:35,631 --> 00:59:38,073
that I miss
is, like, the mystery.
1689
00:59:38,224 --> 00:59:39,633
Like, I almost think Steve and I
1690
00:59:39,726 --> 00:59:41,318
are too comfortable
around each other.
1691
00:59:41,412 --> 00:59:42,819
[chuckles]
1692
00:59:42,971 --> 00:59:44,896
- I miss that chase part of,
like, dating.
1693
00:59:44,915 --> 00:59:46,473
And that's something
that I said, like,
1694
00:59:46,491 --> 00:59:47,398
even in the beginning
when we were,
1695
00:59:47,492 --> 00:59:48,584
like, having our problems.
1696
00:59:48,735 --> 00:59:49,810
And I'm like,
1697
00:59:49,903 --> 00:59:51,328
"Honestly, our problems started
1698
00:59:51,480 --> 00:59:52,754
"because of you and your mouth.
1699
00:59:52,906 --> 00:59:54,923
"And I feel like I'm the one
that's talking to you,
1700
00:59:55,075 --> 00:59:57,241
reaching out to you,
chasing you."
1701
00:59:57,336 --> 00:59:59,836
- Guys, they never, like...
1702
00:59:59,988 --> 01:00:00,762
Think.
1703
01:00:00,989 --> 01:00:03,414
[chuckling]
1704
01:00:03,434 --> 01:00:04,825
There's nothing
I miss about dating.
1705
01:00:04,843 --> 01:00:06,827
I like living with someone.
1706
01:00:06,845 --> 01:00:09,271
I like waking up to someone.
1707
01:00:09,498 --> 01:00:11,273
Like, I just--I'm
enjoying everything.
1708
01:00:11,424 --> 01:00:12,515
But at the same time,
1709
01:00:12,668 --> 01:00:13,925
I'm also taking it day by day.
1710
01:00:14,019 --> 01:00:16,169
So I'm not letting myself
1711
01:00:16,262 --> 01:00:18,688
getting lost in, like,
the fairy tale.
1712
01:00:18,841 --> 01:00:20,190
- Mm-hmm.
1713
01:00:20,284 --> 01:00:23,118
- So I'm still realistic,
but I don't miss dating.
1714
01:00:23,269 --> 01:00:24,620
[chuckles]
1715
01:00:24,771 --> 01:00:26,437
- I don't know, man.
1716
01:00:26,457 --> 01:00:27,789
I've had some fun.
1717
01:00:27,941 --> 01:00:29,683
- With dating.
- Yeah.
1718
01:00:29,701 --> 01:00:30,700
- So you--
1719
01:00:30,853 --> 01:00:32,352
- [laughs]
- So you--so you
1720
01:00:32,371 --> 01:00:33,854
miss the chase?
1721
01:00:33,947 --> 01:00:35,538
- Yeah, man, I miss being wooed.
1722
01:00:35,691 --> 01:00:38,282
I've dated some--I've dated
some established men
1723
01:00:38,302 --> 01:00:40,135
and older men.
1724
01:00:40,286 --> 01:00:42,286
Men who, like, really got
their [bleep] together
1725
01:00:42,306 --> 01:00:43,880
and are ready to,
like, woo a woman.
1726
01:00:44,032 --> 01:00:45,957
And I like to be wooed.
1727
01:00:45,976 --> 01:00:47,534
The type of men that
approached me
1728
01:00:47,552 --> 01:00:49,886
are big fish, but they
don't necessarily have
1729
01:00:49,980 --> 01:00:51,629
the qualities I want when
it comes to a husband.
1730
01:00:51,649 --> 01:00:54,650
And I think I could very
easily have that with Mark.
1731
01:00:54,877 --> 01:00:56,209
And I'd love to have that
with Mark,
1732
01:00:56,228 --> 01:00:59,229
but I'm not willing
to give up all of that woo.
1733
01:00:59,381 --> 01:01:01,548
You gotta give me some, okay?
1734
01:01:01,566 --> 01:01:03,474
Listen, at least he's
having sex with me again
1735
01:01:03,494 --> 01:01:05,327
and I'm getting my orgasm, so.
[laughs]
1736
01:01:05,478 --> 01:01:07,829
- Okay.
- Oh, my God.
1737
01:01:07,981 --> 01:01:09,498
- It does wonders
for my attitude.
1738
01:01:09,649 --> 01:01:11,224
[laughter]
1739
01:01:11,243 --> 01:01:13,059
It really does.
1740
01:01:13,153 --> 01:01:14,911
- At its best
in these last four weeks,
1741
01:01:15,063 --> 01:01:16,897
when has it been its highest
and when has it been its lowest
1742
01:01:16,915 --> 01:01:18,656
since you guys got married?
1743
01:01:18,676 --> 01:01:19,841
- It's like
touch and go each week.
1744
01:01:20,068 --> 01:01:22,736
I feel like as far as,
like, effort
1745
01:01:22,829 --> 01:01:24,996
on things that
she's done for me,
1746
01:01:25,090 --> 01:01:27,073
I'd say she's like a nine.
1747
01:01:27,092 --> 01:01:29,667
More like a ten because she's
done so many nice things for me
1748
01:01:29,687 --> 01:01:31,520
as far as, like, doing things
and cleaning the house,
1749
01:01:31,671 --> 01:01:32,837
taking care of the cats.
1750
01:01:32,856 --> 01:01:34,523
But listening to me
and how I need her
1751
01:01:34,674 --> 01:01:36,174
to relax a little bit
on some things,
1752
01:01:36,268 --> 01:01:37,934
I give her, like, a six
1753
01:01:38,086 --> 01:01:40,754
because that's not
where I want it to be for me.
1754
01:01:40,772 --> 01:01:42,698
- I'm gonna say last week,
you guys seen my energy,
1755
01:01:42,925 --> 01:01:44,515
I was dead.
1756
01:01:44,609 --> 01:01:46,702
I was at--I was at, like,
a four out of ten, it was low.
1757
01:01:46,929 --> 01:01:48,445
But this week,
I feel like, you know,
1758
01:01:48,539 --> 01:01:50,447
I'm an eight out of ten,
and that's really high.
1759
01:01:50,541 --> 01:01:52,265
It just means you're going
through moods and swings.
1760
01:01:52,284 --> 01:01:53,283
- So there was never
a time when you felt like
1761
01:01:53,377 --> 01:01:55,285
a one or a zero?
1762
01:01:55,379 --> 01:01:58,288
- One and zero, if I hit
that low, I'm giving up.
1763
01:01:58,382 --> 01:02:00,607
- I've definitely had
a time where I was like,
1764
01:02:00,625 --> 01:02:03,201
maybe, like, a two or a one
1765
01:02:03,220 --> 01:02:04,702
just because things
were so tough.
1766
01:02:04,722 --> 01:02:05,795
And I'm just like,
1767
01:02:05,948 --> 01:02:08,039
"If we're having
this much issues
1768
01:02:08,058 --> 01:02:10,058
this early on, like, how are
we gonna get out of this?"
1769
01:02:10,210 --> 01:02:12,043
- Right.
- I mean, my parents were
1770
01:02:12,062 --> 01:02:14,137
never married, so I never
really had my own, like, idea
1771
01:02:14,289 --> 01:02:15,230
of what marriage looks like.
1772
01:02:15,381 --> 01:02:17,065
So I knew I
was be--going into it.
1773
01:02:17,292 --> 01:02:18,900
I created my own idea
of what marriage is.
1774
01:02:19,052 --> 01:02:21,052
But even with that,
I didn't think
1775
01:02:21,071 --> 01:02:23,964
it'd be this difficult
this early on.
1776
01:02:23,982 --> 01:02:26,149
- On a scale of one to ten,
what do you rate your marriage?
1777
01:02:26,301 --> 01:02:28,651
- I think maybe, like, a seven.
1778
01:02:28,804 --> 01:02:30,653
♪ ♪
1779
01:02:30,806 --> 01:02:32,414
Because we had a lot
of great conversations
1780
01:02:32,641 --> 01:02:35,733
and so I think until I start--
Things start moving
1781
01:02:35,753 --> 01:02:37,586
and we're doing everything
that we said we're gonna do,
1782
01:02:37,737 --> 01:02:38,903
then that rating will be higher.
1783
01:02:38,922 --> 01:02:40,814
But I can't think--
I can't think
1784
01:02:40,832 --> 01:02:42,240
she'll say anything
higher than a seven.
1785
01:02:42,259 --> 01:02:44,075
- I don't even feel comfortable
giving us a rating,
1786
01:02:44,094 --> 01:02:45,151
to be honest.
1787
01:02:45,245 --> 01:02:46,762
So I'm just not gonna do it.
1788
01:02:46,913 --> 01:02:48,263
- I think that's fair.
1789
01:02:48,414 --> 01:02:49,931
- We're just--we're just
working on our marriage
1790
01:02:50,083 --> 01:02:51,266
and that's just that.
1791
01:02:51,493 --> 01:02:52,993
- What number
do you need to get at
1792
01:02:53,086 --> 01:02:54,511
for Decision Day to say yes,
1793
01:02:54,605 --> 01:02:55,845
in your head?
1794
01:02:55,998 --> 01:02:57,105
You gotta be a ten,
1795
01:02:57,257 --> 01:02:59,516
or you willing to go yes
on an eight?
1796
01:02:59,668 --> 01:03:03,111
- Would I go yes on an eight?
1797
01:03:03,263 --> 01:03:04,504
I'll go yes on an eight.
1798
01:03:04,523 --> 01:03:05,855
- Okay.
1799
01:03:05,949 --> 01:03:07,507
- But I just feel like
'cause our first month
1800
01:03:07,600 --> 01:03:09,676
has just been
no communication at all
1801
01:03:09,694 --> 01:03:11,936
that our last month together
1802
01:03:11,955 --> 01:03:14,681
would have to be
pretty [bleep] amazing
1803
01:03:14,774 --> 01:03:16,941
for me to say yes
on Decision Day
1804
01:03:17,035 --> 01:03:19,369
because we just lost
1805
01:03:19,463 --> 01:03:21,688
a whole month
of getting to know each other.
1806
01:03:21,781 --> 01:03:22,964
- Sometimes Mark says that.
1807
01:03:23,191 --> 01:03:24,800
He's like, "We lost
three weeks until we had
1808
01:03:24,951 --> 01:03:26,951
a breakthrough and understood
how to communicate."
1809
01:03:26,970 --> 01:03:28,711
And it hurts my feelings
when he says that
1810
01:03:28,806 --> 01:03:30,288
'cause I'm like,
"We didn't lose three weeks."
1811
01:03:30,382 --> 01:03:31,531
- I know.
- "I learned so much
1812
01:03:31,624 --> 01:03:33,049
in those three weeks."
- Mm-hmm.
1813
01:03:33,143 --> 01:03:35,385
And the difference is I didn't
learn [bleep] about [bleep].
1814
01:03:35,479 --> 01:03:36,886
[laughter]
1815
01:03:36,980 --> 01:03:38,313
♪ ♪
1816
01:03:42,711 --> 01:03:47,155
♪ ♪
1817
01:03:49,384 --> 01:03:51,734
- I'm tired.
1818
01:03:51,887 --> 01:03:52,994
Oh, skates.
1819
01:03:53,146 --> 01:03:54,554
I thought I was gonna
break my ankle.
1820
01:03:54,573 --> 01:03:55,738
- Me too.
1821
01:03:55,833 --> 01:03:57,240
- Yeah?
1822
01:03:57,334 --> 01:03:58,408
- Yeah.
1823
01:03:58,560 --> 01:04:00,318
According to the one month,
1824
01:04:00,337 --> 01:04:05,156
is there anything that
you think we need to work on?
1825
01:04:05,175 --> 01:04:07,901
- I need to be wooed.
1826
01:04:07,994 --> 01:04:10,070
- Wooed.
- From that--you gotta earn me.
1827
01:04:10,163 --> 01:04:12,589
Like, you have me
and I'm willing
1828
01:04:12,741 --> 01:04:16,910
to take you for better or worse
and through all your stuff,
1829
01:04:17,003 --> 01:04:18,595
but, like, I get wooed a lot.
1830
01:04:18,689 --> 01:04:22,098
Like, I dunno,
1831
01:04:22,250 --> 01:04:23,750
there ain't no woo.
1832
01:04:23,768 --> 01:04:26,436
- With Lindsey and most
of her relationships,
1833
01:04:26,588 --> 01:04:28,755
she probably always had
somebody kind of, like,
1834
01:04:28,773 --> 01:04:30,773
pursue her pretty hard.
1835
01:04:30,926 --> 01:04:32,926
But the difference
between that and this
1836
01:04:33,019 --> 01:04:34,703
is that there was
breathing room.
1837
01:04:34,930 --> 01:04:36,446
In this situation,
we're with each other
1838
01:04:36,598 --> 01:04:37,873
all day, all night.
1839
01:04:38,024 --> 01:04:39,374
That we have
difficult conversations,
1840
01:04:39,601 --> 01:04:41,192
it's sometimes
harder to go woo her.
1841
01:04:41,211 --> 01:04:43,879
She will get wooed
when the time is right,
1842
01:04:44,030 --> 01:04:47,365
and when she gets wooed,
it will be great.
1843
01:04:47,384 --> 01:04:49,384
- I need to feel like
1844
01:04:49,535 --> 01:04:52,295
you are invested in me
1845
01:04:52,447 --> 01:04:55,056
and, like,
you're making an effort.
1846
01:04:55,208 --> 01:04:58,393
That would be all
the difference for me between
1847
01:04:58,544 --> 01:05:01,137
saying yes and no
on Decision Day.
1848
01:05:01,289 --> 01:05:02,972
♪ ♪
1849
01:05:03,125 --> 01:05:03,973
- Gotcha.
1850
01:05:04,126 --> 01:05:05,475
♪ ♪
1851
01:05:05,627 --> 01:05:07,903
I will take what you want
1852
01:05:08,130 --> 01:05:12,132
into consideration
and try to work on it.
1853
01:05:12,150 --> 01:05:17,561
♪ ♪
1854
01:05:17,581 --> 01:05:20,323
- ♪ Watch out, now you better
make it last ♪
1855
01:05:20,417 --> 01:05:23,326
♪ Find out, gonna make it
your last chance ♪
1856
01:05:23,420 --> 01:05:24,920
♪ Oh ♪
1857
01:05:25,147 --> 01:05:26,162
- Hi!
1858
01:05:26,314 --> 01:05:27,738
- Hello.
- Hi, welcome.
1859
01:05:27,832 --> 01:05:29,832
- How are you?
- Good, good.
1860
01:05:29,927 --> 01:05:31,259
Great to see you.
1861
01:05:31,486 --> 01:05:33,595
I'm gonna be your
yoga teacher for today.
1862
01:05:33,822 --> 01:05:35,746
We're going to help
you guys connect.
1863
01:05:35,766 --> 01:05:37,581
- For some couples,
1864
01:05:37,676 --> 01:05:40,584
doing a little extra homework
to jumpstart physical intimacy
1865
01:05:40,679 --> 01:05:42,086
pays off down the road.
1866
01:05:42,105 --> 01:05:44,606
- I'm gonna have you two
begin sitting back to back.
1867
01:05:44,757 --> 01:05:46,757
We're gonna work on
getting in sync.
1868
01:05:46,777 --> 01:05:48,944
- And for a couple like
Jasmina and Michael who are
1869
01:05:49,171 --> 01:05:50,779
physically attracted
to one another,
1870
01:05:50,930 --> 01:05:52,855
but need to feel more connected,
1871
01:05:53,008 --> 01:05:55,842
Tantric yoga
could be just what they need.
1872
01:05:55,860 --> 01:05:58,936
- Just take a deep breath
in together
1873
01:05:58,956 --> 01:06:01,181
and let it out slowly.
1874
01:06:01,199 --> 01:06:03,441
♪ ♪
1875
01:06:03,535 --> 01:06:05,201
- Yoga is definitely
1876
01:06:05,353 --> 01:06:07,778
a different level of intimacy.
1877
01:06:07,872 --> 01:06:09,613
- Press against each other
1878
01:06:09,633 --> 01:06:11,541
and see if you
can feel a little stretch
1879
01:06:11,693 --> 01:06:13,193
through the upper back,
1880
01:06:13,286 --> 01:06:15,712
through the chest and shoulders.
1881
01:06:15,806 --> 01:06:19,215
- Michael and I are putting
our hands on each other,
1882
01:06:19,367 --> 01:06:22,719
and it feels good being,
you know, close to him
1883
01:06:22,813 --> 01:06:26,797
and letting him
receive all of me in a sense.
1884
01:06:26,817 --> 01:06:30,634
- See if you can hear
her heartbeat.
1885
01:06:30,654 --> 01:06:33,471
Breathing slowly.
1886
01:06:33,490 --> 01:06:35,565
Good, last breath.
1887
01:06:35,717 --> 01:06:37,567
♪ ♪
1888
01:06:37,661 --> 01:06:40,553
All right.
1889
01:06:40,646 --> 01:06:43,814
One more activity
for you tonight.
1890
01:06:43,908 --> 01:06:48,652
It is really helpful in
creating trust, communication.
1891
01:06:48,672 --> 01:06:50,563
- I can definitely
1892
01:06:50,656 --> 01:06:52,749
see myself being intimate
with Michael.
1893
01:06:52,843 --> 01:06:55,010
- "While one person
is asking the question,
1894
01:06:55,237 --> 01:06:57,679
"the person answering
must be blindfolded.
1895
01:06:57,830 --> 01:06:59,848
"If you feel your spouse
was honest with the answer,
1896
01:06:59,999 --> 01:07:02,425
you can reward them
with a treat."
1897
01:07:02,577 --> 01:07:05,595
- But that's only if we create
a bond and trust one another.
1898
01:07:05,689 --> 01:07:07,580
♪ ♪
1899
01:07:07,599 --> 01:07:11,008
- "Do you think you've been
fully vulnerable with me?
1900
01:07:11,028 --> 01:07:14,195
If not, why not?"
1901
01:07:14,422 --> 01:07:18,258
- No, I have not been
fully vulnerable with you.
1902
01:07:18,276 --> 01:07:23,687
Because with the lack
of communication, I don't feel
1903
01:07:23,707 --> 01:07:28,692
that you honestly care sometimes
1904
01:07:28,712 --> 01:07:29,860
for the marriage.
1905
01:07:29,880 --> 01:07:31,454
[clears throat]
1906
01:07:31,548 --> 01:07:33,364
Or for me as a person.
1907
01:07:33,383 --> 01:07:35,717
So I would definitely say
I'm holding back
1908
01:07:35,868 --> 01:07:39,796
giving my all and being
100% vulnerable.
1909
01:07:39,948 --> 01:07:41,447
- All right.
1910
01:07:41,466 --> 01:07:46,786
♪ ♪
1911
01:07:46,805 --> 01:07:47,729
- Yeah.
1912
01:07:47,956 --> 01:07:49,455
So.
1913
01:07:49,474 --> 01:07:53,142
♪ ♪
1914
01:07:53,236 --> 01:07:55,737
"What's hard to say?"
1915
01:07:58,967 --> 01:08:01,984
- That I wish I trust you more.
1916
01:08:02,137 --> 01:08:05,246
Once you have more
conversations,
1917
01:08:05,398 --> 01:08:07,916
and I don't feel like
you're being
1918
01:08:08,067 --> 01:08:09,733
or trying to be defensive,
1919
01:08:09,828 --> 01:08:12,087
you're just genuinely trying
to understand my point of view.
1920
01:08:12,314 --> 01:08:14,738
That'd be a step
in the right direction
1921
01:08:14,833 --> 01:08:17,500
of me trusting you.
1922
01:08:17,652 --> 01:08:21,154
♪ ♪
1923
01:08:21,247 --> 01:08:23,414
- It's not a shock to me that
1924
01:08:23,508 --> 01:08:25,341
you feel that way.
1925
01:08:25,493 --> 01:08:26,750
- Yeah.
1926
01:08:26,770 --> 01:08:28,678
- I also know
that I have to create
1927
01:08:28,830 --> 01:08:31,422
a safe space for you
to trust me.
1928
01:08:31,441 --> 01:08:34,925
And me getting--giving you
certain reactions
1929
01:08:35,019 --> 01:08:36,260
when we've had conflicts,
1930
01:08:36,279 --> 01:08:39,505
I see why you've been
the way you are.
1931
01:08:39,524 --> 01:08:44,861
But nothing is always
completely your fault.
1932
01:08:44,955 --> 01:08:48,014
- This is the first time
Jasmina has taken ownership
1933
01:08:48,032 --> 01:08:50,107
in saying
that she does need to create
1934
01:08:50,127 --> 01:08:53,611
that safe space for us
to have open co--open dialogue.
1935
01:08:53,630 --> 01:08:55,112
And I think that's
a huge, huge step
1936
01:08:55,206 --> 01:08:56,297
in the right direction.
1937
01:08:56,524 --> 01:08:57,948
- [whispering]
You like raspberries?
1938
01:08:58,042 --> 01:08:59,041
Do you like blackberries?
1939
01:08:59,194 --> 01:09:00,360
- [whispering]
I like everything.
1940
01:09:00,378 --> 01:09:01,711
- Because I can tell that
1941
01:09:01,863 --> 01:09:03,529
she's really taking it in
1942
01:09:03,623 --> 01:09:06,032
and trying to understand me.
1943
01:09:06,050 --> 01:09:09,869
- "Do you regret getting
married at first sight?"
1944
01:09:09,888 --> 01:09:11,037
- [exhales]
1945
01:09:11,055 --> 01:09:12,538
No.
1946
01:09:12,632 --> 01:09:15,650
We've had a rough patch,
for sure.
1947
01:09:15,877 --> 01:09:18,820
But I will say if we can
make it through this hump,
1948
01:09:19,047 --> 01:09:22,231
I think we'll know
each other a lot more.
1949
01:09:22,325 --> 01:09:24,066
- Mm-hmm.
1950
01:09:24,219 --> 01:09:25,285
- So I don't regret it.
1951
01:09:28,498 --> 01:09:33,576
- I mean,
we've definitely had bumps.
1952
01:09:33,728 --> 01:09:37,821
But we've also had
good moments where I know
1953
01:09:37,841 --> 01:09:40,175
what it's like to be married
to you, like, when we're good.
1954
01:09:40,402 --> 01:09:43,494
And if those moments
can continue,
1955
01:09:43,513 --> 01:09:45,421
you know, that would be amazing.
1956
01:09:45,573 --> 01:09:48,999
♪ ♪
1957
01:09:49,093 --> 01:09:50,426
- I care for her,
1958
01:09:50,520 --> 01:09:52,836
I want to build a
really strong connection
1959
01:09:52,856 --> 01:09:54,263
and strong bond.
1960
01:09:54,416 --> 01:09:55,523
So hoping that,
you know, moving forward,
1961
01:09:55,675 --> 01:09:57,099
we can build that trust.
1962
01:09:57,194 --> 01:09:58,768
- Tilt your head back.
1963
01:09:58,920 --> 01:10:01,254
Open.
1964
01:10:01,272 --> 01:10:02,530
- [grunting]
1965
01:10:02,682 --> 01:10:04,440
- [laughs]
1966
01:10:04,534 --> 01:10:06,108
♪ ♪
1967
01:10:06,203 --> 01:10:08,203
You were supposed to trust me,
why you move?
1968
01:10:08,354 --> 01:10:10,521
- [laughs] Damn!
1969
01:10:10,540 --> 01:10:11,706
Oh, man.
1970
01:10:11,857 --> 01:10:13,374
- [laughing]
- What are you doing?
1971
01:10:13,601 --> 01:10:15,859
- I'm sorry.
1972
01:10:15,879 --> 01:10:17,603
- Wow.
1973
01:10:17,622 --> 01:10:20,106
So much for trust.
- You wasn't supposed to move.
1974
01:10:20,124 --> 01:10:22,383
[chuckling]
1975
01:10:28,558 --> 01:10:29,966
Any flavor you want?
1976
01:10:30,060 --> 01:10:31,375
Lime, raspberry?
1977
01:10:31,394 --> 01:10:33,544
- I'll take raspberry.
1978
01:10:33,563 --> 01:10:35,471
- Looks like we have
a whole game ahead of us, huh?
1979
01:10:35,623 --> 01:10:36,789
- I know, cheers.
- All right.
1980
01:10:36,882 --> 01:10:37,974
- Let's drink before we play.
1981
01:10:38,126 --> 01:10:39,625
[both laugh]
1982
01:10:39,719 --> 01:10:40,735
- We've given Noi and Steve
1983
01:10:40,962 --> 01:10:43,721
the five senses exercise
because although
1984
01:10:43,740 --> 01:10:45,631
they have a good sense
of intimacy already,
1985
01:10:45,650 --> 01:10:47,909
this game will
allow them to go deeper.
1986
01:10:48,060 --> 01:10:49,393
- What do you think,
do we shuffle it
1987
01:10:49,412 --> 01:10:50,803
or we just go
straight from the top?
1988
01:10:50,822 --> 01:10:52,321
- Let's just
go straight from the top.
1989
01:10:52,474 --> 01:10:53,564
- Ideally, it will force them
1990
01:10:53,583 --> 01:10:55,583
to get out of
their comfort zones
1991
01:10:55,735 --> 01:10:58,828
and practice communicating
their needs, wants, desires,
1992
01:10:58,922 --> 01:11:00,663
and even fears.
1993
01:11:00,815 --> 01:11:02,406
- "Taste.
1994
01:11:02,425 --> 01:11:04,425
Take a body shot."
1995
01:11:06,245 --> 01:11:08,004
What is a body shot?
1996
01:11:08,156 --> 01:11:09,413
- There's two ways
you can do it.
1997
01:11:09,432 --> 01:11:10,823
One right in the skin,
1998
01:11:10,916 --> 01:11:12,583
or two if you put a shot glass
1999
01:11:12,602 --> 01:11:15,419
on someone's body
and take it off of it.
2000
01:11:15,513 --> 01:11:16,604
There's two approaches.
2001
01:11:16,756 --> 01:11:19,332
- [laughs] Okay.
2002
01:11:19,425 --> 01:11:22,351
This is not ideal.
[laughs]
2003
01:11:22,504 --> 01:11:24,837
I don't know how to do this.
2004
01:11:24,856 --> 01:11:26,114
- Just open wide.
2005
01:11:26,265 --> 01:11:28,283
[laughing]
2006
01:11:28,434 --> 01:11:30,860
- I've never taken
a body shot before.
2007
01:11:31,012 --> 01:11:33,362
Ever.
2008
01:11:33,515 --> 01:11:34,363
- [chuckles]
2009
01:11:34,516 --> 01:11:35,790
You got it!
2010
01:11:36,017 --> 01:11:38,184
I mean, it's not my first
body shot by any means.
2011
01:11:38,277 --> 01:11:39,460
And I'm sure it's not hers.
2012
01:11:39,687 --> 01:11:40,795
She might have just been,
you know,
2013
01:11:40,946 --> 01:11:43,022
acting like that
for her new husband.
2014
01:11:43,041 --> 01:11:45,024
- "Dance for your partner."
2015
01:11:45,043 --> 01:11:47,618
- [chuckles]
2016
01:11:47,637 --> 01:11:48,711
[both laughing]
2017
01:11:48,805 --> 01:11:50,212
- What are you doing?
2018
01:11:50,365 --> 01:11:52,456
♪ ♪
2019
01:11:52,475 --> 01:11:55,718
[laughs]
2020
01:11:55,870 --> 01:11:57,887
- Now guess what fruit it is.
2021
01:11:58,039 --> 01:11:59,555
- Blackberry?
- Blackberry.
2022
01:11:59,707 --> 01:12:01,223
- Mmm.
2023
01:12:01,376 --> 01:12:03,651
"Tell your partner
one intimate fantasy you have
2024
01:12:03,803 --> 01:12:05,636
or would like
to try with them."
2025
01:12:05,730 --> 01:12:06,896
Why don't you go first?
2026
01:12:07,048 --> 01:12:09,640
[laughs]
2027
01:12:09,734 --> 01:12:14,978
- I think we should try
2028
01:12:14,998 --> 01:12:17,815
taking a shower
and washing each other
2029
01:12:17,909 --> 01:12:20,226
with soap and water.
2030
01:12:20,244 --> 01:12:21,894
Washing the other person.
2031
01:12:21,913 --> 01:12:23,412
[both laugh]
2032
01:12:23,506 --> 01:12:26,657
- Okay, okay.
2033
01:12:26,676 --> 01:12:28,009
[laughs]
2034
01:12:28,236 --> 01:12:29,919
I'm like...
2035
01:12:30,013 --> 01:12:34,757
so you just want
to take a shower and get clean?
2036
01:12:34,851 --> 01:12:37,334
All right.
2037
01:12:37,354 --> 01:12:42,506
I think we should
2038
01:12:42,525 --> 01:12:45,008
try to have sex
2039
01:12:45,103 --> 01:12:47,269
in a semi-public place.
2040
01:12:47,422 --> 01:12:49,680
[both laugh]
2041
01:12:49,699 --> 01:12:51,107
- What do you mean semi?
2042
01:12:51,259 --> 01:12:53,368
♪ ♪
2043
01:12:53,595 --> 01:12:54,777
- [whispering]
Outside of our home.
2044
01:12:54,929 --> 01:12:57,020
- Okay, that sounds good to me.
2045
01:12:57,115 --> 01:12:58,522
I have a few ideas.
2046
01:12:58,541 --> 01:13:00,190
Run 'em by you.
2047
01:13:00,284 --> 01:13:02,935
I'm actually shocked 'cause
this is the first time I think
2048
01:13:02,954 --> 01:13:04,604
she's said
the word sex in public,
2049
01:13:04,622 --> 01:13:06,547
and never mind
to have sex in public.
2050
01:13:06,699 --> 01:13:08,883
I'm actually somebody
who really enjoys
2051
01:13:09,110 --> 01:13:11,219
helping somebody
fulfill their fantasies.
2052
01:13:11,370 --> 01:13:13,054
So whether we're on a road trip
2053
01:13:13,281 --> 01:13:15,131
or just going
for a walk in the woods.
2054
01:13:15,283 --> 01:13:16,557
But I have a few other ideas,
2055
01:13:16,709 --> 01:13:18,542
I just think I have
to find something that
2056
01:13:18,561 --> 01:13:22,880
is safe enough
to not get in trouble.
2057
01:13:22,899 --> 01:13:26,234
And that would--that she'd
be comfortable enough with it.
2058
01:13:26,385 --> 01:13:28,628
- "Write down your fears,
struggles, or worries
2059
01:13:28,646 --> 01:13:30,980
and watch it burn together."
2060
01:13:31,074 --> 01:13:33,299
♪ ♪
2061
01:13:33,317 --> 01:13:36,226
As much as I
2062
01:13:36,320 --> 01:13:39,972
love Steve and we have this,
like, intimate connection,
2063
01:13:40,065 --> 01:13:41,899
I'm starting to realize that
2064
01:13:41,993 --> 01:13:44,919
I have to do things
that are uncomfortable for me.
2065
01:13:45,070 --> 01:13:48,664
Some of my fears is not
surviving as a married couple.
2066
01:13:48,816 --> 01:13:50,908
It's so much work.
2067
01:13:51,002 --> 01:13:55,412
Just opening up and letting my
husband see who I really am.
2068
01:13:55,432 --> 01:13:58,324
A few of my worries,
worrying if I am strong enough
2069
01:13:58,342 --> 01:14:00,083
to be your better half.
2070
01:14:00,178 --> 01:14:02,011
Worried about our future.
2071
01:14:02,105 --> 01:14:04,772
Worried that you won't
love everything about me.
2072
01:14:04,999 --> 01:14:07,424
- You don't
have to worry about that.
2073
01:14:07,444 --> 01:14:08,776
[both laughing]
2074
01:14:09,003 --> 01:14:10,945
- Oh, my God.
- Okay, just playin'.
2075
01:14:11,172 --> 01:14:13,948
I fear that we can't
grow and adjust in the ways
2076
01:14:14,099 --> 01:14:16,509
we need from each other.
2077
01:14:16,527 --> 01:14:19,011
♪ ♪
2078
01:14:19,030 --> 01:14:21,289
As far as intimacy goes
and sexual chemistry,
2079
01:14:21,440 --> 01:14:24,183
things are still
really great for us.
2080
01:14:24,202 --> 01:14:26,276
And I feel really
secure in what we have.
2081
01:14:26,370 --> 01:14:29,538
But my biggest concern
at this point in this marriage
2082
01:14:29,691 --> 01:14:33,634
is the expectation
that Noi has for me,
2083
01:14:33,861 --> 01:14:37,213
and that it doesn't
work out between us.
2084
01:14:37,365 --> 01:14:44,145
♪ ♪
2085
01:14:52,230 --> 01:14:53,637
- Can I try?
2086
01:14:53,656 --> 01:14:54,880
- What are you gonna do?
2087
01:14:54,899 --> 01:14:56,732
- For you on you.
2088
01:14:56,826 --> 01:14:59,643
I'll pro--I'll not go.
2089
01:14:59,662 --> 01:15:00,828
- My trust have not--
Hasn't been the same
2090
01:15:00,980 --> 01:15:02,330
since the whipped cream.
2091
01:15:02,557 --> 01:15:04,499
- [laughs]
- Go ahead, do your thing.
2092
01:15:07,895 --> 01:15:09,578
♪ ♪
2093
01:15:09,672 --> 01:15:10,730
Feel how smooth that is?
2094
01:15:10,823 --> 01:15:14,567
- Wow, look at you.
- See?
2095
01:15:14,585 --> 01:15:16,010
I would say at this point,
2096
01:15:16,237 --> 01:15:18,237
I'm feeling hopeful
in our marriage.
2097
01:15:18,256 --> 01:15:20,906
I'm feeling like
our mindset has changed.
2098
01:15:20,925 --> 01:15:23,518
♪ ♪
2099
01:15:23,745 --> 01:15:25,578
- [laughing]
2100
01:15:25,596 --> 01:15:27,079
- What?
2101
01:15:27,098 --> 01:15:29,582
I'm not sleeping without this,
I'm dead serious.
2102
01:15:29,600 --> 01:15:31,600
- Maybe you should put it over
your mouth so you don't snore.
2103
01:15:31,753 --> 01:15:33,435
- And when we can just
have fun with each other
2104
01:15:33,530 --> 01:15:36,105
and really focus on building
a great foundation
2105
01:15:36,257 --> 01:15:38,032
and being
each other's better half.
2106
01:15:38,183 --> 01:15:40,426
- I think yoga was good.
2107
01:15:40,444 --> 01:15:44,947
- Yeah.
- It definitely made us closer.
2108
01:15:45,041 --> 01:15:47,691
- I think doing the exercise
was the first time
2109
01:15:47,710 --> 01:15:49,860
that we looked
at each other in the eye
2110
01:15:49,954 --> 01:15:52,788
for a long period of time
since--since the wedding day.
2111
01:15:52,940 --> 01:15:54,623
- Mm-hmm.
2112
01:15:54,776 --> 01:15:55,716
- Yeah.
2113
01:15:57,461 --> 01:16:02,372
- I haven't felt a spark since,
2114
01:16:02,392 --> 01:16:04,116
like, our wedding day.
2115
01:16:04,135 --> 01:16:07,453
- ♪ All I want is you
in my arms ♪
2116
01:16:07,471 --> 01:16:09,230
- But looking
each other in the eyes,
2117
01:16:09,381 --> 01:16:13,309
all these exercises just
brought up similar feelings.
2118
01:16:13,461 --> 01:16:15,236
I really enjoyed connecting
2119
01:16:15,463 --> 01:16:16,737
on that level first
before we got--
2120
01:16:16,889 --> 01:16:18,573
- Before speaking.
- To--yeah.
2121
01:16:18,724 --> 01:16:20,390
- Yeah, I agree with that.
- Mm-hmm.
2122
01:16:20,484 --> 01:16:24,653
- If we keep building on
the conversations we had today,
2123
01:16:24,747 --> 01:16:26,229
it would be inevitable that
the emotional connection
2124
01:16:26,324 --> 01:16:27,640
would grow.
- Mm-hmm.
2125
01:16:27,658 --> 01:16:28,991
- But once we have
the emotional intimacy
2126
01:16:29,085 --> 01:16:30,993
as a foundation,
I think everything else would--
2127
01:16:31,087 --> 01:16:32,828
- Fall into place.
- Fall into place naturally.
2128
01:16:32,922 --> 01:16:35,664
- I definitely feel like
a connection is forming.
2129
01:16:35,817 --> 01:16:38,742
But I feel like we have,
like, those good days
2130
01:16:38,761 --> 01:16:40,653
and then,
like, something will happen.
2131
01:16:40,671 --> 01:16:42,171
We just need,
like, a really good--
2132
01:16:42,323 --> 01:16:43,931
- Yeah.
- Streak, like.
2133
01:16:44,083 --> 01:16:46,083
[chuckles]
2134
01:16:46,177 --> 01:16:49,437
- I personally feel like after
the blind truth exercise,
2135
01:16:49,588 --> 01:16:50,846
it's made me feel like
now we know
2136
01:16:50,998 --> 01:16:52,014
where each other's heads is at.
2137
01:16:52,166 --> 01:16:53,182
- Mm-hmm.
2138
01:16:53,334 --> 01:16:55,334
I enjoyed all the activities
2139
01:16:55,353 --> 01:16:57,853
and I think it definitely put
us in a better place for sure.
2140
01:16:57,947 --> 01:16:59,614
- How so?
2141
01:16:59,765 --> 01:17:01,782
- Well, I didn't
cut you off at all.
2142
01:17:01,934 --> 01:17:03,433
I gave my props.
2143
01:17:03,453 --> 01:17:04,785
Gimme a high-five.
2144
01:17:05,012 --> 01:17:06,603
- You have--we need,
like, a whole week of that.
2145
01:17:06,623 --> 01:17:07,863
- Gimme a high-five.
- A whole week of that
2146
01:17:08,015 --> 01:17:10,107
and I'll give you a high-five.
- Small wins.
2147
01:17:10,126 --> 01:17:12,184
- Get a fist bump.
2148
01:17:12,203 --> 01:17:14,778
- What is that?
2149
01:17:14,797 --> 01:17:17,706
- You're corny as hell.
- [laughs]
2150
01:17:17,859 --> 01:17:19,692
- I hate that you think
you're mad funny.
2151
01:17:19,785 --> 01:17:21,469
- I hate that you fell for it!
2152
01:17:21,620 --> 01:17:24,805
- ♪ I'm not gonna tell us no ♪
2153
01:17:31,814 --> 01:17:35,207
- ♪ We gonna keep on,
we gonna keep on rising ♪
2154
01:17:35,226 --> 01:17:37,893
[knock at door]
2155
01:17:37,987 --> 01:17:40,637
- Ooh!
2156
01:17:40,657 --> 01:17:42,398
[laughs]
2157
01:17:42,492 --> 01:17:43,807
- Ah, perfect.
2158
01:17:43,826 --> 01:17:45,050
That's what I'm talking about,
Dr. Viviana,
2159
01:17:45,144 --> 01:17:46,902
that's what I'm talking--
I see a whip.
2160
01:17:47,054 --> 01:17:49,312
I see a whip, I like that...
[imitates whipcrack] Anyway.
2161
01:17:49,332 --> 01:17:50,998
Ooh.
- Oh, my God.
2162
01:17:51,225 --> 01:17:52,574
- Now we're talking,
Dr. Viviana.
2163
01:17:52,669 --> 01:17:54,059
Now we're talking.
2164
01:17:54,078 --> 01:17:57,563
- Dr. Viviana
sent us a--a care package.
2165
01:17:57,581 --> 01:17:58,731
I think that's for you.
2166
01:17:58,824 --> 01:18:00,399
- Hell no,
this ain't going in my butt!
2167
01:18:00,418 --> 01:18:01,901
You know I don't play
with nothin' with the cheeks.
2168
01:18:01,919 --> 01:18:03,010
No, I ain't doin' that.
2169
01:18:03,162 --> 01:18:05,846
- Oh, no, I think I put this on.
2170
01:18:06,073 --> 01:18:08,908
I have been in a relationship
where I was more--
2171
01:18:09,001 --> 01:18:13,003
A little bit of the dominant
one and it kind of just, like,
2172
01:18:13,022 --> 01:18:15,581
turned me off a little bit.
Not a little bit, a lot.
2173
01:18:15,599 --> 01:18:18,859
"Olajuwon and Katina,
you are receiving this basket
2174
01:18:19,086 --> 01:18:20,861
"because we want to--
Want you to have...
2175
01:18:21,088 --> 01:18:23,513
[both laugh]
2176
01:18:23,607 --> 01:18:26,867
- "Fun together as you focus on
trust and intimacy this week.
2177
01:18:27,019 --> 01:18:30,353
"We urge you to push past
any uncomfortable feelings
2178
01:18:30,373 --> 01:18:32,448
"so you can build intimacy
in your marriage.
2179
01:18:32,542 --> 01:18:34,266
Enjoy these goodies."
2180
01:18:34,285 --> 01:18:35,525
Lemme see this.
2181
01:18:35,545 --> 01:18:36,618
Does it hurt?
2182
01:18:36,771 --> 01:18:38,771
- Hit me with it right here.
2183
01:18:38,789 --> 01:18:40,272
Damn, that was my hand!
- Does it hurt?
2184
01:18:40,365 --> 01:18:42,550
- Not my hand, I gotta use it!
2185
01:18:42,701 --> 01:18:44,367
- ♪ You know you wanna ♪
2186
01:18:44,462 --> 01:18:45,553
♪ You know you wanna ♪
2187
01:18:45,704 --> 01:18:47,279
- Okay, girl.
2188
01:18:47,298 --> 01:18:48,371
Okay.
- It's kinda cute.
2189
01:18:48,391 --> 01:18:49,706
- It is.
2190
01:18:49,726 --> 01:18:51,300
- You like my outfit?
2191
01:18:51,394 --> 01:18:53,543
This is?
- Yeah.
2192
01:18:53,563 --> 01:18:54,803
And I wear this.
2193
01:18:54,897 --> 01:18:56,046
[chuckles]
2194
01:18:56,140 --> 01:18:57,973
- That--this is so weird.
2195
01:18:58,125 --> 01:18:59,625
- Are you supposed to--hell, no,
2196
01:18:59,643 --> 01:19:01,126
you ain't putting it on my neck
'cause I'm your dog!
2197
01:19:01,220 --> 01:19:04,054
- Yeah, I put it right here.
- Hell no!
2198
01:19:04,073 --> 01:19:06,741
- And then I be like,
"Come on, Olajuwon."
2199
01:19:06,892 --> 01:19:08,634
- [laughs]
2200
01:19:08,652 --> 01:19:10,578
What are you doing, yo?
2201
01:19:10,805 --> 01:19:12,246
- [laughing]
2202
01:19:12,473 --> 01:19:15,157
♪ ♪
2203
01:19:15,309 --> 01:19:17,326
- This might
be the first outfit we wear.
2204
01:19:17,420 --> 01:19:18,327
When we go down.
2205
01:19:18,479 --> 01:19:20,329
Or if it goes down.
2206
01:19:20,423 --> 01:19:22,998
My wife and I have not had sex
in our marriage.
2207
01:19:23,150 --> 01:19:25,834
So today, I've seen
the tension break from her.
2208
01:19:25,928 --> 01:19:28,262
- Now you can't see me, you
don't know what I'm gonna do.
2209
01:19:28,413 --> 01:19:30,431
- I don't know.
[laughs]
2210
01:19:30,658 --> 01:19:32,508
♪ ♪
2211
01:19:32,602 --> 01:19:35,661
- ♪ No, I won't beg you
to stay if you want to ♪
2212
01:19:35,679 --> 01:19:37,938
- I seen her loosen out.
2213
01:19:38,165 --> 01:19:41,275
I got to finally make
my wife vulnerable
2214
01:19:41,502 --> 01:19:45,112
with this type of dressing up
and this dialogue.
2215
01:19:45,264 --> 01:19:47,006
- I like to be in control,
2216
01:19:47,099 --> 01:19:48,598
and I don't like
to be controlled,
2217
01:19:48,618 --> 01:19:51,677
but I do like
2218
01:19:51,695 --> 01:19:54,696
someone who's
gonna be, like, "Grr."
2219
01:19:54,791 --> 01:19:56,273
Like, I like that.
- Yeah.
2220
01:19:56,367 --> 01:19:59,201
- [chuckles]
- We're getting closer.
2221
01:19:59,353 --> 01:20:00,628
♪ ♪
2222
01:20:00,855 --> 01:20:02,279
Oh, my God.
2223
01:20:02,298 --> 01:20:03,856
- I'm really ticklish.
2224
01:20:03,949 --> 01:20:04,965
- I'm trying
to give you a massage.
2225
01:20:05,192 --> 01:20:07,117
- I know, but it tickles.
- Get it together.
2226
01:20:07,211 --> 01:20:08,544
- I'm trying
to grow up but I can't.
2227
01:20:08,696 --> 01:20:10,304
- Yeah, grow up, exactly.
2228
01:20:10,455 --> 01:20:12,306
- [laughs]
Grow up, let me, like--
2229
01:20:12,533 --> 01:20:16,218
Let me--let my hands
do its magic, you know?
2230
01:20:16,370 --> 01:20:17,703
Gonna do your back now baby.
2231
01:20:17,721 --> 01:20:20,039
- Okay.
2232
01:20:20,057 --> 01:20:21,148
- Ooh.
- This is really what
2233
01:20:21,300 --> 01:20:22,149
I'm about,
I'm really good at massages.
2234
01:20:22,376 --> 01:20:23,651
- It feels so good.
2235
01:20:23,802 --> 01:20:25,302
- You never had a man
give you a mass--like a--
2236
01:20:25,396 --> 01:20:28,047
- No, this is my first time.
2237
01:20:28,140 --> 01:20:29,306
- Yeah, and you feel good.
2238
01:20:29,325 --> 01:20:30,732
That means we got--
We got some chemistry.
2239
01:20:30,885 --> 01:20:32,384
- We got some chemistry.
- We got some chemistry.
2240
01:20:32,403 --> 01:20:33,886
- But we already knew that.
2241
01:20:33,979 --> 01:20:36,055
- Yeah, but now
we're really testing it.
2242
01:20:36,073 --> 01:20:38,315
Like, I know when she says
she felt a little razzle
2243
01:20:38,409 --> 01:20:39,908
when I was on her back.
2244
01:20:40,061 --> 01:20:41,393
I was surprised she didn't
say when I was on her stomach
2245
01:20:41,486 --> 01:20:43,245
'cause I was
kind of near the tutu.
2246
01:20:43,397 --> 01:20:46,231
But hey, if the back is where
it is, that's why I like you.
2247
01:20:46,250 --> 01:20:48,584
You're all done, baby.
- Okay, my turn.
2248
01:20:48,736 --> 01:20:50,327
- It's another way
of us being intimate.
2249
01:20:50,421 --> 01:20:51,846
I--it's cool seeing
each other naked,
2250
01:20:52,073 --> 01:20:53,997
but I have never
touched her like that.
2251
01:20:54,016 --> 01:20:56,016
Back to the blindfolds.
- So you put this back on.
2252
01:20:56,243 --> 01:20:57,409
- Okay.
2253
01:20:57,502 --> 01:20:58,668
- And no peeking.
- I'm not peeking.
2254
01:20:58,762 --> 01:21:01,838
I'm not peeking.
- Don't cheat.
2255
01:21:01,858 --> 01:21:03,858
- ♪ Ooh ♪
2256
01:21:04,085 --> 01:21:05,267
- I'm gonna lift up
your shirt, okay?
2257
01:21:05,361 --> 01:21:06,602
- I knew you was gonna
do that--I knew you was
2258
01:21:06,754 --> 01:21:08,345
gonna do something like that.
- Do what?
2259
01:21:08,364 --> 01:21:11,848
- ♪ Ooh ♪
2260
01:21:11,942 --> 01:21:14,184
- Okay, ready?
- Yeah.
2261
01:21:14,203 --> 01:21:16,261
- Don't kick me.
2262
01:21:16,280 --> 01:21:19,206
♪ ♪
2263
01:21:19,433 --> 01:21:21,208
- Ah!
2264
01:21:21,435 --> 01:21:23,785
- [giggling]
2265
01:21:23,880 --> 01:21:27,106
- Is that wat--is that liquor?
2266
01:21:27,199 --> 01:21:28,290
She put
a shot in my belly button.
2267
01:21:28,384 --> 01:21:30,459
That was kinda, like,
2268
01:21:30,611 --> 01:21:32,461
"Oh,
you really wanna get nasty."
2269
01:21:32,613 --> 01:21:34,537
Lucky I took a shower!
[laughs]
2270
01:21:34,557 --> 01:21:38,208
It showed me that she is
really comfortable with me.
2271
01:21:38,302 --> 01:21:39,301
I had fun with you today,
it was good.
2272
01:21:39,395 --> 01:21:40,710
- I had fun with you too.
- It was good.
2273
01:21:40,804 --> 01:21:41,970
- Want to carry me?
2274
01:21:42,123 --> 01:21:42,971
- Carry you?
- Yeah.
2275
01:21:43,124 --> 01:21:44,899
I like when you carry me.
2276
01:21:45,126 --> 01:21:45,974
Oh!
2277
01:21:46,068 --> 01:21:48,477
[laughs]
2278
01:21:48,629 --> 01:21:50,295
[squeals]
2279
01:21:50,314 --> 01:21:52,907
- ♪ I don't wanna be right
if this is wrong ♪
2280
01:21:53,058 --> 01:21:54,557
- [laughs]
2281
01:21:54,577 --> 01:22:00,139
- ♪ Take me to,
take me to the unknown ♪
2282
01:22:00,157 --> 01:22:04,326
♪ ♪
2283
01:22:04,420 --> 01:22:06,495
- ♪ I want a higher love,
I wanna love ♪
2284
01:22:06,647 --> 01:22:09,406
- Still to come this season
on "Married at First Sight."
2285
01:22:09,425 --> 01:22:11,650
- ♪ Ooh ♪
2286
01:22:11,743 --> 01:22:13,410
- The way I look at you,
I'd--I have never
2287
01:22:13,429 --> 01:22:15,837
opened up to anybody this way.
2288
01:22:15,932 --> 01:22:18,081
Being in love feels
like you're complete.
2289
01:22:18,100 --> 01:22:19,675
It's so beautiful.
2290
01:22:19,769 --> 01:22:21,769
- I'm in love with you, but I
also love you and like you.
2291
01:22:21,996 --> 01:22:23,162
[giggles]
2292
01:22:23,255 --> 01:22:24,513
- All three.
- All three of them!
2293
01:22:24,665 --> 01:22:26,331
- I promise to light up
your life
2294
01:22:26,350 --> 01:22:27,924
like the candles you do
every night.
2295
01:22:27,944 --> 01:22:29,168
- Ooh.
2296
01:22:29,261 --> 01:22:31,428
- I'm grateful,
and I appreciate you.
2297
01:22:31,522 --> 01:22:34,356
I wish going into Decision Day
was easier than this.
2298
01:22:34,508 --> 01:22:35,857
- Let me
see your phone real quick.
2299
01:22:35,952 --> 01:22:37,117
Why do you have that?
2300
01:22:37,344 --> 01:22:38,786
It's tough.
2301
01:22:39,013 --> 01:22:40,028
It's [bleep] that I didn't want.
2302
01:22:40,122 --> 01:22:42,514
- ♪ Side by side ♪
2303
01:22:42,533 --> 01:22:46,126
- We're setting ourselves
up to--to just fail.
2304
01:22:46,278 --> 01:22:47,628
- Anytime we have a conversation
2305
01:22:47,779 --> 01:22:48,870
about our honeymoon--
- Stop, stop, stop, stop.
2306
01:22:49,023 --> 01:22:50,113
You don't have to,
like, grip me like that.
2307
01:22:50,207 --> 01:22:51,373
- You know what, I'm done.
2308
01:22:51,467 --> 01:22:52,874
- That's all BS.
2309
01:22:52,969 --> 01:22:54,376
Could you be doing more?
2310
01:22:54,528 --> 01:22:57,029
- I'm a real person
with real feelings.
2311
01:22:57,047 --> 01:22:58,864
- You give me affection,
you pull it all the way back.
2312
01:22:58,957 --> 01:23:00,290
- I feel
you complain and you nag.
2313
01:23:00,384 --> 01:23:02,125
- Then you can kiss my ass.
2314
01:23:02,144 --> 01:23:03,811
- You want to fight with me,
you want to get tough.
2315
01:23:04,038 --> 01:23:05,387
- I swear to God,
if you're [bleep]--
2316
01:23:05,481 --> 01:23:06,814
Filming is done for the night.
2317
01:23:07,041 --> 01:23:09,725
- You're a bad person,
you betrayed me.
2318
01:23:09,819 --> 01:23:10,985
- This bitch is like,
2319
01:23:11,212 --> 01:23:13,378
"I don't [bleep] know
what just happened."
2320
01:23:13,472 --> 01:23:14,488
- It's the end
of the road for us.
2321
01:23:14,639 --> 01:23:16,139
- ♪ La-la-la ♪
2322
01:23:16,158 --> 01:23:18,325
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
2323
01:23:18,552 --> 01:23:21,887
- The time has come
for you to make a decision.
2324
01:23:21,980 --> 01:23:24,223
- Do you want to stay married?
2325
01:23:24,316 --> 01:23:27,334
- Or do you want
to get a divorce?
2326
01:23:27,561 --> 01:23:28,410
- [sniffles]
2327
01:23:28,562 --> 01:23:33,173
♪ ♪