- Let’s do this.
- 10 singles took a leap of faith
and married complete strangers.
[cheers and applause]
And in less than two weeks,
they will have to decide whether to stay married
or get a divorce.
[cheers and applause]
- ♪ You and me could go ♪
- Oh, that’s a good hit right there.
- Last time, our couples took a deeper dive
into trust and intimacy with their spouses.
Nicole and Chris.
- I didn’t realize I had so many issues
until we talk about all of these things
and I say them out loud.
I’m like, wow, you are really [bleep] up, so--
- Stop that.
You are not [bleep] up.
- Gina and Clint.
- I’m trying to keep an open mind.
I’m not trying to have a predetermined outcome.
- We have to start building some sort of intimacy.
Like, at the end of the day, we’re not quitters.
- Right.
- Kirsten and Shaquille.
- I knew what you were in Memphis for.
- I just really wanted you there.
- That just makes me feel terrible.
- Can you imagine how I feel then?
- I don’t want you to keep feeling like this--
like, that I don’t want to be there
and I don’t want to support you.
Because I do.
- Jasmine and Airris.
- So I’m trying to find, like, other ways that--
that I can be turned on, and I just haven’t gotten there yet.
- I think I’m just at a point where
I’m at my breaking point.
[dramatic music]
♪ ♪
- And tonight we welcome guest expert DeVon Franklin
and sit down with the couples to confront the truth.
- In my relationships, I just brush things under the rug.
- Whatever we sweep under the emotional rug,
it doesn’t go anywhere.
- I appreciate you probably more than you know.
- Do you love her? - I do love you.
- ♪ ’Cause I want to let you in ♪
- Aw.
- Kirsten and I have consummated our marriage.
[cheers and applause]
- I’m over it.
I’m done.
Literally, I’m trying to dance with you.
I’m your wife, but you don’t want to dance with your wife.
Instead, you want to go dance with the instructor.
- You need to be more supportive.
- If this isn’t something you’re willing to do,
there’s the door.
- I got a bone to pick with you after this.
- What?
- You done looked at me in my eyes.
- If it’s a phone call, hell, we’re gonna hang up
and we’re gonna go our separate ways.
[upbeat music]
- ♪ It’s all or nothing ♪
- This is "Married at First Sight."
- ♪ There’s no other way ♪
♪ ♪
♪ It’s all or nothing ♪
- ♪ Nothing like cruising back home ♪
♪ Through some two-lane country ♪
♪ ♪
[knocking on door] - Hey.
- Hi! - What’s up, Jasmine?
- How are you? - How you doing?
DeVon. - Good to see you.
- With just 12 days left until Decision Day,
Jasmine and Airris have unfortunately
hit a breaking point in their marriage.
So we’ve invited guest expert DeVon Franklin
to meet with them individually to bring a new perspective
on how they can fight to make their marriage work,
and to help them figure out how to vocalize
what they need from their spouse before it’s too late.
- First of all, thanks for having me.
- I’m glad you’re here. - I’m here to help.
- Yes. - OK?
I am here to help.
You know, I heard that you had a really strong
breakthrough with the women.
- So yeah, I had a breakthrough with the girls yesterday.
I wasn’t expecting to have that breakthrough.
- OK. - Like...
I’ve learned in this process that
in my relationships, I just brush things
under the rug ’cause I’m very non-confrontational.
- Mm-hmm.
- So yesterday was just kind of like a breaking point.
- Whatever we sweep under the emotional rug,
it doesn’t go anywhere. - Mm-hmm.
- Eventually it’s gonna pile up,
and somebody gonna see our mess.
- Mm-hmm.
- So basically it’s like, OK...
- They seen all my mess yesterday.
- You just, you know, you had no choice
but to just let them know, hey, here’s what’s really going on.
Which is good, right?
Because transparency leads to transformation.
So that’s really, really good.
- Mm-hmm.
- The question is, what are you doing
relative to your communication with Airris, you know?
Have you expressed to him the same way
you expressed to the women how you’re really feeling?
- No.
I mean, I’m sure he can feel it because, I mean, you know.
I know where I’m at and, like, how I feel.
- OK, well, let’s start there.
Where--where are you at?
- Well, I feel like me and Airris are compatible.
- Mm-hmm.
- I feel like we have things in common.
- Mm-hmm.
- And I feel like in the long run, we could work.
I don’t feel like he feels that way.
But I don’t know yet, because I ain’t asked him.
- But here’s the thing.
But let’s separate tasks for a moment, right?
- OK, OK, OK. - Your task is not
to figure out how he’s feeling. - OK.
- Your task is to say, this is what I want,
and also begin the process of having the courage
to communicate that. - Mm-hmm.
- So what do you want this marriage to look like?
- Well, I want us to, like, connect on all levels.
- Mm-hmm.
- And we’ve definitely had deeper conversations.
- Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
- But the issue arose of, like, he was getting
really deep and I wasn’t.
- Mm, OK, let’s pause there.
Why?
- I just--it’s--
I felt like I was telling my truth.
Like, I haven’t had trauma in my life.
So, like, a question for him,
he can go on about it for 30 minutes.
And for me, it’s a simple answer.
- And so he is telling you it wasn’t deep enough.
- He, like, went on for, like, 30 minutes
about needing his friend who committed suicide.
He didn’t leave a letter.
Like, and that was really deep.
But for me, I’m just like, I can count on one hand
how many funerals I’ve been to.
And, like, the few things that happened in my life,
it’s not that deep.
- OK, so let’s-- let’s talk about that.
What are those things?
- Like, through middle school, I was the new girl,
and I was too proper.
I was too put together.
I was too this.
I was too that.
And I just got bullied for, like, three years straight.
And I had no self-esteem.
I had no self-love.
At home, it was peaches and cream.
My family, like, made me feel great,
but in those three years of, like, me getting bullied,
I was just in a deep, dark place.
- And did they know how you felt about being bullied?
- Mm-mm.
- OK, so you never expressed it?
- Mm-mm.
- Swept it under the rug?
- Mm-hmm.
- OK, see, this is great. OK, all right.
[laughter]
But you see the pattern.
- Mm-hmm.
- You just said earlier, oh, I haven’t
had anything traumatic.
That’s not true.
That, what you’re expressing, is incredibly traumatic.
And that right there, that moment
is on some level playing itself out,
because you’re experiencing a situation in your marriage
that you don’t know how to deal with.
- Mm-hmm. - Right?
Like, I don’t know how to deal with some of the things
that my husband has said.
- And even, like, with my parents,
I’ve never seen them handle conflict.
So in relationships, to me, conflict is--
I don’t know.
- Mm-hmm, got it.
So you basically grew up with the trauma
of, like, at home, let me just make sure everything’s OK,
and everybody is, like, loving, and I’m loving.
But I can’t really talk about what’s going on at school.
So I learned to suppress. - Mm-hmm.
- And then I don’t have a model that I was exposed to
about what communication looks like in a marriage.
So then when I get married, I’m bringing that same idea here.
Here’s the thing.
You have the ability to change that.
- Mm-hmm.
- What do you feel are the things that are keeping you
from just telling him exactly how you feel
and asking him exactly what you want him to do?
- I think I’m more so worried about the response.
- OK, so let’s talk about that. - Mm-hmm.
- What is the response you’re actually afraid of?
- I think I’m more so worried that he’s gonna--like,
if I say, like, where are we, like,
how are you feeling about this marriage,
or I’m thinking he’s gonna be like,
yeah, I’m really not in it.
- Let’s say you get that response, right?
OK, that response is neither here nor there.
It’s not an indictment on Jasmine.
- Mm-hmm.
- You are still amazing and wonderful.
So if he may have that response,
that truth may actually be additive to you
versus living in a fantasy.
Do you really want to live in a situation
where you really don’t know
where you are and your spouse is?
- No.
- We don’t know what Airris is gonna say.
We’re not gonna worry about that.
- Mm-hmm.
- What we’re gonna worry about is Jasmine
having the confidence and the courage
to go in there and say, we gotta talk.
- Yeah.
- ♪ No, it’s never too late ♪
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- ♪ I’m finally taking it all in ♪
[water running]
- Hey.
- Hello, hello.
I can’t even see you with all your camo.
♪ ♪
I fed the boys.
- Kobe ate really quick this time.
He usually saves it.
- Yeah, well, because Kodah ate half his food this morning.
OK.
- I know it’s been a kind of emotional and deep
couple of weeks for you.
So I just wanted to make sure that we’re talking
through everything, and that if there’s something
that I’m not doing that I should be doing, like,
I want to make sure that I’m doing that.
- When I say I need space and alone time,
it’s because, in the moment, I do,
but I would love for you to almost not let me have that.
- If you want space and you tell me you want space,
I shouldn’t give you space?
That’s just kind of confusing.
[tense music]
If you’re feeling a certain way and I don’t know
you’re feeling a certain way... - Right.
- How am I supposed to, like, find out?
- What I mean is if I say to you,
I need space, please, like, let me have space,
that means what it means.
But if I’m like, I’m just gonna sit in the other room,
I have a lot of feelings,
I don’t know how to process them yet,
maybe ask if I want to sit in the living room
or can you sit with me?
Because if I don’t know how to process it,
I don’t.
But it might be easier to process
if I could say things out loud, even if it doesn’t make sense.
♪ ♪
In my past experience--
experiences, any time I’ve gotten emotional
or had any feeling that I want to share
or, you know, I’m not feeling good about something
and I bring it up, I’ve almost been pushed to the side.
Like, my feelings don’t matter.
They’re not relevant or, like, uh, I don’t--
I’ve literally had a guy say to me, like, I’m not here
to deal with your baggage, so figure it out
and then come back.
So I immediately--when I get upset, I’m like, great,
he’s gonna not want to deal with it.
He’s gonna like me less.
- I want you to know that, like,
I’m not scared by anything,
like, that you’re going through, like--
- Rationally, I know that you are not going anywhere.
Deep down, my inner, inner core does not know that yet.
♪ ♪
Eventually, the plan is to get to the point
where I don’t even think these thoughts,
but until I get there,
I’m going to need more validation and reassurance.
And if this isn’t something you’re willing to do,
there’s the door.
If you are interested, please stay.
♪ ♪
- I’m not--the door is not even in my eyesight.
I don’t want--I don’t want to--
I don’t want to push you away in any way,
and I don’t want you to, like, pull away in any way.
So, like, just know that I’m here for the long haul.
I’m not here for anything else other than for our marriage.
- OK, thank you for saying that.
And I am going to take that and tell myself
that you are saying it because you want to
and not because you feel like you have to.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
- ♪ Working on my big dreams ♪
♪ Blank check, zero drama ♪
♪ Working on my big life ♪
♪ You cost big boy dollars ♪
♪ Working on my big dreams ♪
♪ Blank check, zero drama ♪
[phone ringing]
♪ Working on my ♪
- Oh, God.
Hello.
- Hi, there.
- How you been?
- I’m doing fine. How are you?
- I’m doing great. I feel like
I haven’t seen you or talked to you in a while.
Have you talked to Shaquille?
- You know I have.
- I was gonna say, I feel like you have.
Yeah, he-- - So how are y’all doing?
- We’re doing all right.
I just feel like he’s a little, you know,
stressed out and overwhelmed right now.
And I just kind of wanted to get some insight in, like,
how I can be there and communicate with him
during these times, because I don’t want him,
you know, to feel stressed out and overwhelmed.
And I always tell him, like, how he feel
is very important to me.
- I don’t know exactly what’s all going on between you guys,
but you need to be more supportive.
[tense music]
It’s some--it’s some miscommunications
and everything. - Yeah.
- And you’re not supporting him the way
that he would like to be supported, you know,
because I know he really wish you would have been there
with him this past weekend.
- How’s everything going?
How’s the recruiting and everything going?
- It’s been good.
The president, she was really happy with the setup.
So this was really a productive trip.
- He’s really hurt behind it. - Mm-hmm.
- He really is.
I just want to let you know, he is, you know?
- Mm-hmm, we had a long conversation about that,
and, you know, I even apologized to him.
I was like, well, I’m sorry I wasn’t there physically.
We just had a miscommunication.
- OK, and have you been there for him since?
- Oh, yeah, like, I text him throughout the day.
I send him affirmations
because I know he likes affirmations sometimes.
- I’m not there to see what’s going on between you guys,
but from the conversations that I had,
it was not all of that.
♪ ♪
- I’m gonna do everything in my control, you know,
and in my power that I could possibly do, you know, to--
- OK, support him.
- Yeah. - That’s number one.
He’s really under a lot of stress right now.
- Mm-hmm.
- And he needs you more than anything.
♪ ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, you changed my heart ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
- Are you about to start cooking?
- Yes, ma’am.
So we’re gonna make a catfish po’ boy.
So we’re gonna get some oil going.
- And we’re putting moonshine pickles?
- Heck yeah.
- Whoo!
- Yeah, those are hot tamales.
- Mm-hmm.
- Those will get you.
So--
- I think they’re stronger than they were
when I first had them.
♪ ♪
Whoa.
- Yeah.
- That is a shot.
- Ooh, these are nice, healthy pieces.
- Oh, yeah, that’s massive.
- I love cooking for the people that I care about.
That’s one of the things that I do to kind of put
a personal spin on, like, hey, I’m gonna spend time,
and I’m thinking of you while I’m doing this.
So I’m putting a lot of thoughtfulness
into what I’m actually making.
♪ ♪
- That is so good.
Just like grandma’s, you know?
- Isn’t that crunch just ridiculous?
- Uh-huh.
[laughs]
- It’s nice being able to cook some food together.
- Yeah, it gets lonely cooking by yourself, you know?
- Yeah.
- That’s why I stopped doing it,
because I was like, I’m just wasting money
when you’re cooking for one.
- Yeah, it’s like, when people appreciate
the food and the effort...
- Uh-huh.
- That makes you want to do it more.
- Yeah.
I feel like we are designed to have a partner in life,
and marriage is definitely a partnership and something
that, you know, each equal partner brings something
different to the table to really make life
easier and more enjoyable.
I care about him.
I think he has a massive heart.
You know, we still have a little time left
before Decision Day, and so I’m hoping that
we can just use it wisely.
- Like, I like to have my Gina time too.
- I can handle that.
- ♪ I won’t give up on you ♪
- ♪ Sky, crashing waves in the moonlight ♪
♪ Time stops, fading in the high tide ♪
[knocking on door] - Hey, how’s it going, man?
- What’s up, man? - How are you doing?
- How are you doing? DeVon. - Nice to meet you, bro.
- Nice to meet you, man.
I’ve heard a lot of good things about you.
- Thank you, man. Appreciate it.
- How’s your day going?
- Oh, cool, just getting off work.
I’ve got a lot going on.
- So I’m here to help, man.
I had heard that the physical attraction was an issue.
And then, you know, talk to me first of all about that.
- That’s, like, the biggest hurdle,
and I feel like that’s causing, like, most of the issues
because she feels it too.
You know what I mean?
So it’s like, she feels my energy,
like, not where it should be.
- Mm-hmm.
- So it’s just-- and it’s just new territory.
- Mm-hmm.
What are the things you find appealing about Jasmine?
- She has a passion.
You know, like, a lot of people just
go to work for a paycheck, you know,
to pay the bills. - Yeah.
- She’s got her dog breeding business,
cheerleading coach, aesthetician.
You know, it’s like she do multiple things.
I feel like that’s appealing.
You know, that’s attractive.
And she has, like, a calming presence.
Like, I feel like the world is crazy,
so, like, your home should be, like, your safe haven.
- Right.
- So there’s things, yeah.
- But there’s a lot of things.
- Right, right.
- So you know appealing is just another word for attractive.
- Right.
- So my question, though, for you is do you want
to become more attracted to her?
- I do, but, like, a person can’t,
like, change or, like, I can’t get taller
or whatever, whatever.
So, like, I’m who I am.
She’s who she is.
- What line of work are you in again?
- Software development.
- So and what’s your position?
- Product analyst. - Product analyst?
Mm-hmm. Are you good at it?
- Yeah, I feel like I’m good at it.
- Yeah, and you’re passionate about it.
- Right. - Got it.
- And you put in the effort the job requires?
- Yes. - OK.
Do you feel like you’re putting in
the same effort in your job
that you’re putting into your marriage?
- No. - OK, why not?
- For one, like, if I lose my job,
man, a lot can happen, you know?
Like, I might be--
car gone.
I ain’t got no roof over my head.
With this, if this don’t work, I can just say no.
- Mm-hmm.
- And you know, I didn’t hate my life pre--
like, I was fine, like--
- Mm-hmm, but is that how you want to live, fine?
- No, I want to, like, share this world with,
like, somebody else.
- Mm-hmm. - Like, uplift someone,
have that person uplift me, have my back.
Like, I want children, you know?
So a big part of that, of what’s missing in my life,
is, like, a marriage.
It’s marriage, so...
- You want all these things, and you are married.
- Right. - You have a wife...
- Right. - That has the potential
to give you everything you just said you wanted.
- Correct.
- Yet to your own admission, you’re not even
putting in the effort to see if that potential
can be realized.
- I’m not doing as much as I could.
- As much as you could do? - Yeah.
- You know, so I’m curious from your vantage point, you know,
when you think about, you know, this obstacle...
- Right.
- What would need to happen for you
for you to feel like, OK, here’s how
I could possibly get there?
- I guess, like, a deeper connection
and for her to, like, I guess, open up a little bit more.
Like, even, like, Dr. Pepper gave us,
like, a bowl of questions we had to ask each other.
So, like, I might answer a question.
I might, like, dive deep and, like,
pour out into this question.
And her answer might be, like, real surface level.
- What about asking her some more questions?
- Follow-up questions.
- Yeah, instead of, you know, maybe saying,
oh, well, I went deep and she didn’t,
like, which is a judgment--
- Right. - Because maybe--
- Or here we again, right.
- Right, exactly.
So communication is one. - Right.
- And deepening that.
What else?
- Being intimate, because in the beginning,
right, like, there was, like, you know,
peck kisses or, like, if I’m leaving out the house, a hug.
- Mm-hmm.
- And then when the whole, like, physical attraction
got brought, like, out in the open,
it just kind of created this distance.
Like, it’s not, like, that big of a deal,
but, like, it’s become a bigger deal
because we’ve both allowed it to.
- The more you just get in there
and you take the initiative and break the ice,
the more you’re gonna see what’s there for you.
And I think part of what I would ask you to do
is can you verbalize to her what your commitment is to her?
- Yeah, I can do that.
- And that’s what I really am getting at
is, like, don’t let the "I’m not physically attracted"
become a crutch and an excuse that gets you
to Decision Day, and it becomes a, you know,
predetermined outcome because you’ve already
been using this as the excuse.
- What I don’t want to happen is, like,
Decision Day comes and, like, you know,
five, six months later, I’m like, damn,
I wish I would have did, you know,
what DeVon told me, or what Dr. Pia told me,
or--or just some things--
I have, you know, just no regrets.
- Absolutely, and I’m gonna tell you something.
If you don’t do it,
you’re gonna find yourself in that place.
- Yeah. Yeah.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Just another day in paradise.
Getting a little pedi with my boo.
♪ ♪
We heard we might be doing some whiskey tasting,
some...
[Southern accent] Country line dancin’.
[upbeat country music]
- ♪ We head out on the town ♪
♪ Somewhere we can live it up ♪
♪ And she can let her hair down ♪
♪ ♪
- Hello, hello.
♪ ♪
Anyone else feeling sore from baseball?
Because Chris will not admit it,
but I will embarrass him that he’s feeling a little sore.
- Oh. - My wrist is hurting.
I ain’t even gonna lie. My wrist is hurting.
- My hand was hurting. - Your hand?
- How was the, what was it, Liquor Lab
or something like that? - We were mixologists.
- There you go.
- If you guys need an espresso martini,
we’ve got it. - We got you.
- So what were y’all talking about?
We weren’t there. We would like to know.
- That is a good question.
You know, a little bit of girl talk,
so we can’t tell you everything that was said.
But I think feelings were expressed in a way
that we don’t always feel comfortable
expressing in front of our husbands.
[tense music]
- I kind of had, like, you know, like,
a little breakdown with the girls.
Like, I got super emotional.
♪ ♪
You know, I try to be this strong person,
but I just couldn’t be strong anymore.
- I have to be honest with you.
Seeing how upset Jasmine was broke my heart.
- Oh, wait a minute. - Mine too.
Mine too.
- I know that you are trying as hard as you can,
but I need you to try harder.
And I need Jasmine to also try harder
because you made it seem like you are not
having conversations that you know you should have.
Have them.
♪ ♪
This is something I have learned through this process.
Being vulnerable makes you strong.
- Yeah. - It does not...
- It’s not weak. - Take that strong woman
and make you weak. - Right.
- Like, the worst thing would be to just internalize it
and then let it build and build and build,
and then it just blows up.
- Everybody struggles with something.
- Mm-hmm.
- It’s always going to be something.
You know, I’ve shared, like, things with Gina.
Like, I had--one of my best friends had a mental illness,
and he ended up taking himself out because of it.
And nobody knew about it.
And it was just like one of those things, like,
if I look back and knew about it,
I would harbor an atmosphere where
he’d be comfortable to talk about it, but I never knew.
- I had a friend in college, same thing.
He just hid it from everybody.
- Yeah. - So it sucked, man.
And it was really hard for us, so--
- Yeah, suffering in silence.
♪ ♪
- Yeah, I--like, full transparency,
I was that person before.
- Oh, wow. - Like, yeah,
everything seems to be going good,
but on the inside, you’re fighting
internal battles with yourself.
And it’s kind of like, do anybody see me?
Like, I don’t feel present in the moment.
And then, like, that’s when
I really decided to go to therapy.
And in that moment, it was kind of like, OK,
like, I get to unlearn some of these bad habits
that got me thinking this way.
And it was kind of like I was going through it in--
like, in silence.
It was, like, a dark, dark place, and, like,
I’m like-- when y’all talking about it,
I’m like, dang, I was that guy, like--
- Yeah. - But you know,
life has a special purpose.
And you know, like, I’m just gonna live.
- Sorry about that, man. - Cheers to that.
- Cheers to living.
Clink, clink, clink, clink, clink, clink.
- Getting a little heavy.
- Yeah. - No.
No. - Yeah.
- It’s like--it’s like a mini therapy session.
- I know. I feel like I started that.
So I’m going to close the loop
and say this is always a safe space.
- Yeah.
- Shaq, thank you so much for sharing that.
- Yeah, dude. - And we are all
so thankful that, you know,
you were able to overcome that, and I’m sure,
you know, feelings come and go.
So it’s not like it’s just gone in your past.
And if anything ever comes up, we are here for you.
You have an amazing wife who I know wants
to be there for you every chance she gets.
So please utilize her as a resource.
♪ ♪
I’m speaking for you, Kirsten.
I’m sorry, but I know that that is the truth.
- Sure.
♪ ♪
[tense music]
♪ ♪
- What’s the matter?
- I wasn’t OK because of the comment that Nicole made.
- OK.
- And you had nothing to say about it.
So with me being vulnerable in that moment,
another wife spoke on behalf of you,
and you had nothing to say for it.
- I didn’t even get a split second to say anything.
♪ ♪
I put my hand on your leg when you were talking.
I rubbed your back as well.
I don’t want you to ever feel like you’re alone.
- Yeah.
- Like, you can always tell me.
And you can always talk to me.
I may not always be able to be next to you, but--
- Like, but when you say-- you’re like, oh,
I’m always here, you know you can talk to me
about stuff, yeah, I do.
But it’s kind of like, damn, when I need you to be there,
it’s kind of like--
- Just because I’m not right beside you
doesn’t mean I’m not there for you.
- But that’s the point.
I want you to be right next side of me.
I want you to be there.
I need you to be there.
It’s not a want no more.
It’s a need.
And when stuff happens, it’s kind of like--
when I told you what happened,
I would have felt better if you was there.
When I was in Memphis, I found out
I would not be graduating on time.
I’m a goal-oriented person,
and to find out I won’t be graduating on time,
it’s like--it was a moment that I really
just needed my wife by my side, but she wasn’t there.
- I’m telling you, like, you can still
call me if I’m not there with you.
- It’s not a phone call, though.
It’s not a phone call.
If I--if it’s a phone call, hell, we gonna hang up,
and we gonna go our separate ways.
♪ ♪
- I understand what you’re saying
when you say you want me there and you need me there.
And I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you.
But going forward, if you want me to be somewhere with you,
say that at the very beginning.
Just say that.
Kirsten, I want you there. So...
- Kirsten, I said I wanted you there
because I made hotel accommodations.
Then you said you wasn’t gonna come down till Friday.
And you say--I was like, OK.
And then you brought up how you had to--
or you had to work on Sunday.
♪ ♪
- Oh, Lord.
- Where’s--where’s Kirsten and Shaq?
Like-- - I don’t know.
- Did they go to the bathroom?
- They left us.
- They’ve been gone a while.
- Maybe he was having a moment after he shared and--
- Yeah, I mean, he shared something pretty deep.
- I want you to know that we’re in this together, Shaquille.
I want you to know that, and I want you to feel that.
I told you weeks ago I want you to be happy.
OK? - OK.
♪ ♪
- Can I have a hug?
♪ ♪
I really want you to know that I am here for you.
I really do.
♪ ♪
- Welcome back, guys. - Yeah, welcome back, guys.
- Thank you. - We OK?
Is everything good? - Yeah.
We’re miscommunicating when it comes to me
attending his work events because I’m like,
Shaquille, you waited until the event is over
and you express to me how badly you wanted me to be there.
But now that I know every single event,
he wants me to be there, I’m just gonna go ahead
and take the initiative and put it on my calendar
and attend those events.
- But what do you need for Shaq to know in order
to, like, move forward?
- Just to be assertive, like, to tell me when you need me.
- What you want.
- Yeah, what you want from me, what you need from me.
And when you tell me, then I’ll proceed.
- That’s very direct, and I told him, like,
I do need, like, a direct statement.
- Maybe try that next time.
[laughter]
- Talking about being more assertive,
did you share with your husband
what we spoke about at the girls’ thing?
- A little bit, I did.
I definitely want Shaquille to, you know,
get me aroused and in the mood.
- You’re not gonna turn him down?
- If he does--
- She’s not gonna turn him down.
She’s not gonna turn him down.
All she needs you to do is light a candle,
play the music, and give her a little foreplay,
and she gonna be ready to give the goods up.
- Whoa.
- Shaq, you know, I asked you what base you guys were on,
and you let us know.
I’m asking you the same thing. - What base did you say?
- No, no, no.
- You tell us.
- You know, somewhere between second,
trying to steal third to get a home run.
- OK.
♪ ♪
- Be aggressive, assertive.
- Take the initiative.
- Have I taken the initiative?
♪ ♪
- Be assertive.
- Be assertive? - I’m telling you.
- Kirsten and I have consummated our marriage.
[all cheering]
- Oh, wow. - Thank you for the honesty.
Thank you.
- Oh, they went to pound town.
- That’s not what I was gonna say.
- Shaq and Kirsten went to--went to town.
- I wasn’t gonna say "pound town."
- Why?
What’s wrong with pound town?
- No, it just shocked me.
- But that’s country, though.
- Is it? - Yeah.
- ♪ Bring it on down to pound town ♪
- I’m gonna rub that head.
- I got a bone to pick with you after this.
- What?
- You done looked at me in my eyes.
- We wanted to keep it between us,
[bleep], long as we could.
- Not "long as we could."
So it’s been a while.
[laughter]
- Well, listen, we all talked about our emotions
all goddang night long.
Now, we’re gonna get our dancing boots on.
We’re gonna mosey on the dance floor
and get our kicking on, huh?
What y’all say? - Yee-haw!
[laughter]
♪ ♪
- Hi, everyone. My name is Priya.
Are we ready to get started? - Yee-haw.
- Let’s do it. - Let’s do it, OK.
We’re in Nashville.
So we have to break out our lasso, obviously.
- Oh.
- 5, 6, 7, 8, we lasso to the front.
We boogie to the back.
- ♪ When she struts her stuff ♪
♪ A boy can’t get enough ♪
♪ Because she’s high class ♪
♪ And try to get a smile from her, no chance ♪
♪ You’re gonna get her phone number ♪
♪ She knows what she’s got and how it moves ♪
- We’re boot scooting.
We got our boots down.
We’re boogieing.
- Spot on, baby. - Spot on.
Spot on is what she said.
- ♪ Let’s get wild tonight ♪
♪ And act like strangers ♪
all: Go, Clint. Go, Clint.
Go, Clint. Go, Clint.
- I always admire Clint’s dancing.
He always, you know, gets into it, give it all that he gots.
Like, I’m like, get on down.
Get on down, Clint. Do your thing.
- ♪ Let’s get wild tonight ♪
[all cheering]
- Oh, dang!
- ♪ It’s an old times, good time last goodbye ♪
♪ Let’s get wild tonight and act like strangers ♪
♪ I ain’t trying to change it ♪
♪ I’m just remembering what summer love is like ♪
♪ ♪
- I’m over it.
I’m done.
What the [bleep]?
Literally, I’m trying to dance with you.
I’m your wife, but you don’t want to dance with your wife.
Instead, you want to go dance with the instructor.
Do you even care about this marriage?
I’m [bleep] done.
I’m sick of this [bleep].
I’m just over it in general.
I’m over everything.
I’m tired of, you know, giving my all
and putting forth effort for him
to continue to do things that--
that are basically just a slap in the face.
[dramatic music]
- So what do you want to do?
- I don’t [bleep] know.
In that moment, I needed him to think about me.
♪ ♪
And he didn’t.
What the hell is that?
- I’m sorry.
I apologize.
The way I took the situation,
the girl was, like, showing me a dance
because I was literally, like, the worst dancer.
Like, I sucked.
So I felt like maybe she was showing me a move.
That’s not even, like, my type that I go for,
but I’m acknowledging your feeling.
With the--with the state of our relationship,
I totally understand why
it looked as bad to you as it did.
And I’m not--I’m not diminishing your feelings
or telling you you shouldn’t feel a certain type of way.
But it wasn’t like I was like, oh, screw this.
I’m just gonna dance with this girl.
Like, I was literally minding my own business.
- But you literally didn’t have to dance with her.
- You’re right.
You’re correct.
♪ ♪
- So I think we-- did we lose them?
We lost a couple-- we lost the group.
- We lost a couple, Airris and Jazz.
- ♪ Turn up our love ♪
♪ Give me the dream I adore ♪
♪ Never enough ♪
♪ I need the pleasure so pure ♪
♪ I don’t want compromise ♪
♪ All that I need is your all ♪
♪ ♪
♪ I got a hole inside my heart ♪
♪ It’s got me begging for more ♪
♪ Turn it off ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Turn it off ♪
♪ Just turn it off ♪
♪ Turn it off ♪
[indistinct singing]
♪ Till the power breaks down ♪
♪ Till the window cracks ♪
♪ Just turn it off ♪
- So are you looking forward to this visit with Dr. Pepper?
- I think it’ll be--
I think it’ll be good.
- With Decision Day fast approaching...
- This is so needed.
- We, the experts, are meeting with the couples
to help them confront the truth within themselves
and with their partner and examine
any lingering questions they have.
- Thank you for coming to see us.
- Of course. - We appreciate that.
- Are you kidding me? Yeah, I’m here to help.
- Yeah.
- So they have the opportunity to work through them
before Decision Day.
[knocking on door]
- Hi, guys. - Hi!
Oh. - Oh, hi there, sweetie.
- Sorry, Dutchie. - It’s OK.
I’m a dog person, so you know.
- OK, OK, and she loves people.
- Oh, hello, sweetie.
- She greets everybody.
- Hi. Good to see you.
- Good to see you too. - Good to see you.
- Hello again.
- All right.
So I gather a lot has been going on since last we talked.
- Yeah.
- Tell me a little bit about the emotional climate here
and what you’ve been through in the last 24 hours
and then we can move on from there.
- OK.
Well, this week for me was just--
just a super emotional week.
I’m learning a lot about myself and my emotions
and how I cope with conflict.
And then on top of that, last night, the line dancing,
like, instructor, like, came up to him and grabbed him
and, like, went off and started dancing.
And it just triggered me.
And I was like, I’m no longer not showing my feelings
or, you know, speaking up.
So it was just kind of like,
I’m not cool with this, so I’m out.
- I was aware, and I was conscious of, like,
where we at--where we are in our relationship.
So I understood her feeling how she felt.
And I still feel bad about it, but I’ve had,
like, a little time to reflect.
And I felt like the storm out made it--
it made it, like, a scene, you know?
I don’t--I don’t--
I don’t think it was-- like, it was warranted.
[tense music]
- So what I want to know is where you guys are headed
and if you’re done in some way.
If you no longer have a hope or want to do, see,
or hear anything, let me know.
I mean, we’re not here to tread water.
♪ ♪
Do you see a possibility for this marriage?
♪ ♪
[tense music]
- Do you see a possibility for this marriage?
♪ ♪
- I see a possibility.
Like, I see-- like, I understand
why we were matched.
We have moments, like, when we’re "dating."
Those are some of our best moments.
And I want those moments to last longer.
♪ ♪
- In the past, I’ve said how I feel lost in this marriage,
I feel like, because I don’t know where he’s at.
And I mean, he’s kind of reassured me
tonight that he’s still in it.
- Let me ask you what you need individually
in this relationship to further its possibilities
in these next weeks.
- You know, we met with DeVon earlier,
and he put, like, a different perspective that, you know,
I can, like, create a more, like, nurturing,
safer environment for you to feel comfortable
expressing yourself and being vulnerable.
- I like it.
What’s your hope?
- I’m hoping to feel in the next few weeks
more like a wife and not a friend.
- Can you think of any specific small thing that would
make you feel more wifely?
- I mean, if I don’t text him throughout the day,
I don’t hear from him.
So it’s like, do you not think about me,
or do you not want to talk to me?
- So that’s developing habits of connection.
- Mm-hmm.
- Let’s say you set your phone
to whatever time you have
and, you know, say, OK, it’s 2 o’clock,
I’m gonna text Jasmine and ask how her day is every day
or most days, you know?
How do you do when the person comes in the door?
What do you do when the person comes in the door?
- Say what’s up.
- So that’s romantic.
- Right.
- How about making it real?
When the person comes in, you come up
and either give a peck on the cheek or--
- A hug.
- A hug leaving out in the morning, yeah.
- A hug when you leave and a hug when you get back.
- Yes. - Yes.
- Small efforts go great distances.
You are going to need to make an informed decision
between now and Decision Day.
You need all the information, connection,
and acts, real acts,
that you can put into this marriage now.
OK, so can I get, like, a promise here
that these things that I’ve asked for,
that you’re really gonna do these things?
- Yes. - Yes.
- Can I--can I get a, like, yes on this, you know?
- Yes!
[laughter]
- ♪ It’s gonna be great, it’s gonna get better ♪
♪ You’re gonna be all right ♪
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Hi, ladies. - Hi, how are you?
- Good. How are you?
- Good. - Good.
What can I do to help y’all today?
- Lingerie is not my favorite thing to put on,
but I am trying to step out of my comfort zone
and feel a little better about myself,
and show that side of myself to my husband,
so... - Awesome.
Well, we have some great and unique pieces.
I’m sure that we can find you something
that’ll make you feel wonderful.
- Thank you.
- You are so welcome.
- Are you looking for any particular color today?
- Well, red is his favorite.
- Oh.
- Maybe, like, a red robe over something white or black.
She’s pretty.
I don’t love lingerie shopping because I don’t have
the perfect supermodel body.
- I did say, like, little-- little thicker
than I normally go for, but not in a bad way.
- I do call myself a thicker girl, but...
- It’s different. I know.
- It’s very--girls can say whatever they want.
It’s very different to hear someone else say it.
Now I have to hide my rolls
as we have this conversation about it.
- You’re beautiful.
You’re beautiful inside and out.
- I’m trying to tell myself, like,
you might never see perfect,
but it’s OK to not see perfect.
So I’m changing the narrative because if I keep looking
in the mirror expecting everything
to be how I want it in my head, I’ll never be happy.
- Right. - So now I’m trying to--
- Speak positive of yourself. - Exactly.
- Yeah, speak some light and life in to yourself.
- Right.
Sometimes I doubt, like, am I--you know,
do I deserve a man as wonderful as Chris?
- You deserve Chris. - Thank you.
- You are an amazing woman.
- And I know that, but there’s always a part of me
that’s like, are we sure?
- Get out of your head. - Yeah, like, it’s--
- Get of your head. - This is ridiculous.
- That’s right.
We’re gonna get it together today.
- Yeah, yeah.
- And I have to get you some moves too.
When you--when you get it on, we can practice that, like,
a little sexy walk.
- Yeah, yeah, a sexy walk is not my thing.
I’m more of, like, crawl like a gremlin,
and be silly, and make him laugh.
But I don’t think that’s the time or place.
He sees me dress like an eight-year-old skateboarder
half the time.
So anything really is an upgrade.
- OK, well, let’s upgrade.
- So I think he will be like, oh, my God.
Should we start the party?
- Let’s start the party.
- Come on in.
- We need some champagne.
- All right, thank you.
- You’re welcome.
- Kirsten, you are welcome to join the party.
- OK.
- Oh, I love your mirror.
It says, "You are beautiful."
- Like, you look amazing.
Don’t start talking yourself out of it.
- It’s definitely not something I would normally wear
because I prefer to wear things
that enhance my breasts.
- This is a great way to start off saying
I appreciate my body. - Yes.
- You know, as you’re walking in--
let’s see. Let me just--
- What’s a good entrance point?
I like a prop.
- Kind of, you know, gotta have a little honey,
spray a little perfume on, do a little sexy walk,
and then you’re gonna start untying things
so he can see it.
And then, the next thing you know, ah, there goes the robe.
- I don’t know that I’ll ever 100%
love everything about myself, but as long
as I’m working on it, I think that’s a huge step.
And I hope Chris loves me not in spite of that,
but because of that.
Usually I’m just like, OK, I’m here.
- Mm-mm.
- The clothes are off.
Like, do what you gotta do.
- Mm-mm, you gotta set the mood, set the tone.
- OK.
- Mm-hmm, sexy.
♪ ♪
- ♪ I’m so tempted to tell you ♪
♪ That you might be the one, girl ♪
♪ ♪
- Oh, Hank, you--you are going to win my heart.
- Hank.
- So let’s talk about you guys.
We’re really kind of rushing towards Decision Day,
and I think you guys need to up your game a little bit.
- We’ve been, like, trying to focus on that
because for us, we still feel kind of friendzoned.
- You guys have talked a lot of being friendzoned,
but the deepest friendship is a kind of love.
- Yeah.
- Do you each have friends that you would say you love?
- Yeah. - Oh, yeah.
- Absolutely.
- OK, so you know what that feels like.
So this is a road that you can also go through here.
One of the things you might think about
is maybe asking each other what you’d
really like from one another.
You know, what would make you feel cared for
and would bring you to those deeper feelings.
- That’s challenging because I don’t even know what I need.
But I’ve been learning through this experience
that I am independent, sometimes to a fault.
So it’s, like, hard to try to figure out,
like, what you actually need from someone in that way.
- Can you think even of one thing
right now that would make you feel touched and known
if he would do that for you?
- I think just, like, the support of, like,
knowing I’m doing a good job, things like that.
Like, I’m always one--
I think the most emotional I get
is when, like, people that are really close to me are like,
I’m so proud of you.
- So affirmation in very specific ways.
- Yeah.
- So complimenting her more, being more cognizant of,
like, the special attributes that she has, yeah.
- Yeah.
- So can you think of some things
that you would want from her?
What would touch you?
- I think it’s just something that was not
expected, something special.
- OK.
- It could be really anything, as long as,
like, there was time spent on whatever it was, right?
Maybe it’s setting up the house a certain way
and making it look, you know, nice,
like, anything like that.
- OK, so how about her cooking dinner for you?
- The meals are Clint’s thing.
- Well, but, you know, you-- even if he’s the main guy,
you could take care of him... - Yeah.
- And plan something, and do something,
and quality time for the two of you
to do together that she thinks about and presents to you...
- Yeah.
- That shows that she knows you.
- Yeah.
- I want to try and move you closer together
in some of the things that involve your heart
and your physical selves.
There’s movies that I think are emotionally moving,
and they’re romantic movies in their own way but different.
One is--
- "Top Gun."
- I loved "Top Gun," but no, no.
Did you ever see "Driving Miss Daisy"?
- Yeah.
- It’s not a romance, but it is--it is a beautiful
story of love and devotion.
Or "The Art of Racing in the Rain."
This is kind of a love story between a man and his dog.
- Aw.
- We’re in.
- It’s the only time I’m gonna ever cry too.
- Yes.
- I want you guys to open up emotionally.
These are all movies that I think ask you to do that.
- I love that.
- Now, if I asked you to hold hands right now,
would that feel awful? - No.
- I mean, that’s fine.
- So hold hands.
OK.
- Why are you--
get in for the waffles.
- OK.
So there, you know, just a connection.
What is one true thing that you haven’t said to each other
that you could say to each other now?
- You’ve, like, gone above and beyond to incorporate yourself
into my life, whether it be just helping me
in different ways, like, you know,
taking Hank out on walks, and really being a good dog dad.
And making sure, you know, that I’m being fed,
because I probably wouldn’t eat throughout the day
if it wasn’t for you.
And I appreciate you probably more than you know.
- Yeah, and likewise.
I mean, it’s just the appreciation for, like,
your character, and your bravery,
and to try something new and different,
and, like, going on some of my journeys,
and being open-minded.
I definitely appreciate that.
And you having that entrepreneurial spirit,
despite, like, life giving you some challenges,
that just says an immense amount about your character.
- Thanks.
- Are those things you’ve never said to each other before?
- I don’t think we’ve ever, like, really verbalized that.
But I think we know it, but yeah, we haven’t sat down
and, like, truly said it.
- There’s a lot of marriages that would have liked
this description a lot. - Mm-hmm.
- That’s good to hear. - Yeah.
- And it sounds like if you two weren’t married,
you’d have a lot to miss.
- Mm-hmm, I would agree.
- ♪ Yeah, you and me are on our way ♪
- ♪ Every day I wake up, pick my feet off the ground ♪
- Today, Kirsten and I
are scheduled to meet
with DeVon Franklin.
- We’re struggling with our communication with each other.
And I always feel like it kind of sets us back
sometimes in our marriage. - Hey.
- Hello. - How you doing?
- Good. How are you?
- DeVon. Nice to meet you.
- Kirsten and I, we’re always on two different pages.
Like, we’re never on one accord.
Even when we think we’re on one accord,
we’re never on one accord. And it’s confusing.
I’m like, what the hell?
Like, why?
- It’s good to see you both.
It’s great to meet you. Heard a lot about you.
You know, I heard about what happened last night and--
and the conversation.
So I just wanted to get a better sense
of how you all are feeling,
you know, about that incident.
Have you been able to work towards a resolution as a way
to kind of help me understand where you are
and where we need to go?
- I mean, it was just a big miscommunication.
And I tell him that I want us to do better on communicating
with each other.
I feel like we both dropped the ball.
When you tell me at the very end,
like, I wish you were there, I can’t believe you didn’t come
after everything is over, I’m like, well,
why didn’t you express this to me at the very beginning?
Because had he made it sound like that
at the very beginning, it would be no doubt and no question.
Like, I wouldn’t even ask any questions.
Like, I’d be like, I’m there.
- Do you feel supported in the marriage?
- Not at certain times.
- It’s a yes or a no.
- No.
- OK.
Do you feel you give support in the marriage, just in general?
- In general, yes.
- Here is the reality.
Unspoken expectations are relationship killers.
I want my spouse to do something.
I haven’t expressed that I want them to do it.
I haven’t got them to agree to do it,
but then I hold them accountable
and I get upset as if I actually did.
Then there’s resentment.
And that resentment is gonna drive a wedge between you all
that over time can be very difficult to fix.
This issue of support is a marriage deal-breaker.
So one of the things I want to work on
is this, right, this unspoken expectations
that you both kind of have and working on communicating.
Shaquille, can you just take a moment
to explain to Kirsten, what does support look like to you?
- Kirsten, the type of support I would like to see
is for you to be invested in who I am.
I want you to see me in my zone
of doing something I love to do.
That way, you can appreciate when I go off to work.
And that’s why I was like, you know,
even with the work event, I wanted you there,
not because of I’m just trying
to show off my wife, but in that moment,
it was an opportunity for you to see me first hand at work.
And that’s a part of me that you have not seen yet.
[soft music]
♪ ♪
- [sighs]
I feel like I am there for you.
The time we visited Jackson
for you to have the presentation down there,
I asked you all about your education.
I try to be supportive as far as, like,
reminding you, hey, did you, you know,
get to work on the paper today?
Did you find somebody to help you with it?
Like, I do those type of things.
And it’s like, I don’t know if you’re
recognizing or really understanding that
that is me supporting you.
It does make me feel like, OK, like, I’m not doing enough.
- Yes, we did go to Jackson for the research conference,
and I did show you the board.
But it’s like, it’s so much more than that.
Like, that was literally, like, our first week being married.
Like, but it wasn’t, like, this is really big for him.
- But hold on. But hold on. Hold on now.
It’s really hard to prescribe
how someone should respond.
It sounded like you were almost diminishing her support.
If she had showed up, or she’s trying to show support,
or she’s asking questions and that’s not good enough,
that might, like, not motivate her to want to lean in
and want to ask more questions.
Because it’s like, well, look, if I ask these questions
and it’s like, well, I didn’t ask them the right way,
that becomes really challenging.
Because on some level, what she’s looking for
is also validation and acceptance.
Hey, I see you.
Thank you for showing up.
- I am a very supportive person,
and that also comes within time.
Over time, like, I’ve been very supportive,
you know, as a daughter, as a sister,
in my previous relationship.
So for me, that comes within time.
Like, it’ll become as easy as clockwork.
♪ ♪
- Do you feel that? - Yes.
- And do you believe that?
- I believe it.
- The reason why this is so important now
is it lays the foundation for what’s going to come.
But the key is this--
communicating, talking to each other,
and taking the pressure off of each other.
He’s too-- he’s too hard to please.
You know what?
She doesn’t care.
- Mm-hmm.
- In that space, we create our own narratives,
and our own narratives always are gonna
work against our marriage.
- Not Shaquille and Kirsten.
It’s us.
- Because two become one. - Yeah.
- ♪ Yeah, it’s bright, oh ♪
♪ Now just burn brighter ♪
- ♪ I never knew loving that would feel so true ♪
♪ You got the key to my heart ♪
- How are you guys doing? - Good.
How are you? - We’re good.
- Awesome. Well, you know,
you guys look more settled
than the last time. - Oh, yeah.
- Oh, for sure.
- So tell me, how has this journey been up to this point?
- A lot of diving deep, a lot of emotions
and kind of diving into our past and...
- Very good.
- Like, doing all the exercises and stuff.
- We’ve shared a lot about our past,
and it’s brought up a lot.
And--and I know this is gonna sound not right,
but I’m just going to say it
because I know what I signed up for.
But there is a little part of me
that I still think, like, well, he didn’t pick me.
He was chosen for me by experts,
who did an amazing job, but he didn’t pick me.
- But at this point, I would pick you.
You know that, right?
- I know that, but there’s still a little
part of me that cannot--
- I need you to stop, OK? - I know.
How, though?
- I really need you to stop, OK?
First of all, you need to understand
that he did pick you, not after he met you,
but he picked you before.
And this is how that happened.
He told us everything he wanted.
- Yeah.
- And he went through great lengths
to be completely honest and open about himself.
And you did the same.
When you gave us all that information,
we said, OK, these two, sight unseen,
are actually choosing each other.
And he’s--are you happy?
- Everything’s been awesome with her.
She’s been, like, there for me.
Like, there’s not any questions about, like,
does she have my back?
Does she have my best interests at heart?
Because she fully does.
So, like, yeah, she doesn’t need to worry.
No matter how much I tell her she doesn’t need to worry,
like, there’s still--
I feel like there’s still--like, she’s got
the angel and the devil on the shoulders.
- Yeah, the little devil. - Yeah.
- And I feel like sometimes
she listens more to the little devil at times.
- Right now it feels like there’s
a part of me that’s trying to make him run away
so I can say, oh, I was right. - Yes.
- Like, I knew he was gonna do it like every other guy.
But I don’t want him to go anywhere.
- You know what that--you know what that’s called?
Self-sabotage.
- Yeah, oh, yeah, I’m good at that.
- Yeah.
You know, when you got this guy on your shoulder
telling you negative stuff, realize you put him there.
- Yeah.
- So you have power over him, OK?
- Getting rid of him.
- And that’s--quite often I think we forget
we have power over the negativity
that often confronts us.
- I’m working on it.
- Oh, no, no, no, I need you to start changing--
changing your rhetoric.
You’re not working on it. - I’m doing it.
- Yes. - I’m doing it.
- You’re doing it, exactly.
- My question is, is there something
I can be doing differently to help you, you know?
I’m willing to help you in any way I can.
So you just got to let me know what that is.
- I mean, you are wonderful.
Just asking alone is probably more care than anyone’s ever
put into it, but this is, like, ultimately part of
a bigger fear of I’m afraid of this relationship becoming
about Chris helping Nicole.
- Did you ask him if he feels that way?
- Do you feel like this is one-sided?
- No, I don’t feel like it’s one-sided.
I feel like there’s just--
right now, like, I’ve resolved a lot of my kind of past,
but, like, you know, for you, I think just going through
all these exercises and kind of taking
a deeper look at yourself, it’s like brought out
things that you--
I think you kind of buried it deep down
and thought it was resolved, but it’s kind of opened
Pandora’s box, so to speak.
And I think that’s part of what’s going on.
So, like, in this moment, like, I do feel like I need
to be there and help you more.
But like, it’s not one-sided.
Like, a good example was in the honeymoon
when I was, like, really upset about the dogs
and had a weak moment, like, you took everything on.
It was so impactful and so meaningful
that, like, now it’s got that shift and it’s more on you,
and that’s fine.
Like, that’s part of what it is.
- OK. - So, like, that’s--that’s--
- I can get on board with that.
- Yeah, but you can’t question it.
- Yeah. - OK.
- Yeah, you just cannot. - That makes sense to me.
So I get that.
- You know, I’m blown away by her every day.
Like, she’s got my back no matter what.
She’s always there.
And you know, it’s I know that I can trust her.
I know that I can--
I know that I can tell her anything.
- Do you love her?
- Honestly, I do.
I do love you.
- ♪ But I don’t really want to live without you ♪
- Aw.
- Is this the first time you’ve told her that?
- It is. - Mm-hmm.
- It’s the first time.
I’ve been feeling it for a little while now.
- Why didn’t you say it?
- I was like--I don’t know.
I don’t know.
I don’t know why I didn’t say it.
- Because of the myst--
because of the mystification of it.
We give the word all this credit and all this weight
when, in actuality, the emotions are there.
The commitment is there.
You’re completely committed to her.
- You’re right.
- This is the one that you’re pledging your life to.
- Mm-hmm.
- You chose her.
- I love you.
- And I love you too.
- ♪ Believe in me ♪
♪ ♪
- Next time on "Married at First Sight"...
- Whoo!
- With Decision Day
less than two weeks away,
our couples are heading out on a weekend retreat.
- My hot husband!
[cheers and applause]
- "I love you. Thanks for everything,
and I’m grateful to be your husband."
These are so sweet.
- Hey, y’all, so we got bears.
- I’m gonna open the door.
Hey, buddy.
- Oh, freakin’ God.
- It’s kind of heavy, ’cause then it almost feels
like I’m doing something wrong.
What am I doing that’s making you question this? So...
- I really don’t want to ruin this retreat,
so I’m gonna have to make the best of it.
- You know, we’re not where we want to be.
- I didn’t sign up for this journey
to be married to a friend.
I have lots of friends.
- I definitely need more grace in this marriage
and for it to be consistent.
- She had a guard up all of these weeks.
I done went through all this [bleep] for nothing?
♪ ♪