1 00:00:02,083 --> 00:00:03,417 [dramatic music] 2 00:00:03,542 --> 00:00:05,250 - Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. 3 00:00:05,375 --> 00:00:07,458 - Ten singles took an incredible leap of faith 4 00:00:07,542 --> 00:00:09,000 in order to find love. 5 00:00:09,167 --> 00:00:10,917 They married as complete strangers. 6 00:00:11,042 --> 00:00:12,250 [cheers and applause] 7 00:00:12,375 --> 00:00:14,208 And in just over two weeks, 8 00:00:14,333 --> 00:00:15,958 they will have to decide 9 00:00:16,042 --> 00:00:19,750 whether to stay married or get a divorce. 10 00:00:19,875 --> 00:00:21,667 - ♪ Everything is brighter ♪ 11 00:00:21,750 --> 00:00:25,000 - Last time, our couples dug deep into each other's pasts 12 00:00:25,167 --> 00:00:27,083 in the hopes of better understanding 13 00:00:27,208 --> 00:00:28,833 their future together. 14 00:00:28,958 --> 00:00:29,958 - She shoots. She scores. 15 00:00:30,042 --> 00:00:31,083 - Scores. 16 00:00:31,208 --> 00:00:33,292 - Gina and Clint. 17 00:00:33,417 --> 00:00:35,208 - Soccer taught me a lot about life. 18 00:00:35,333 --> 00:00:36,875 - Yeah. 19 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:38,167 - You know, I learned perseverance, drive-- 20 00:00:38,292 --> 00:00:39,958 - Stay in it. - --and motivation. 21 00:00:40,083 --> 00:00:40,667 Even when I hated it, I wanted to get good. 22 00:00:40,792 --> 00:00:42,333 - Yeah. 23 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:45,250 Clint and I really share that mentality of, like, 24 00:00:45,375 --> 00:00:47,292 not giving up on things, and he really does 25 00:00:47,417 --> 00:00:49,375 try to, like, give his all. 26 00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:50,667 And it makes me feel like we can make this marriage work. 27 00:00:50,833 --> 00:00:52,167 - ♪ From you ♪ 28 00:00:52,250 --> 00:00:54,167 - Jasmine and Airris. 29 00:00:54,250 --> 00:00:56,250 - I feel like moving around so much, like, 30 00:00:56,375 --> 00:00:59,875 whether it's a relationship, whether it's a city, like, 31 00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:02,333 I'll just, boom, get up and go, 32 00:01:02,458 --> 00:01:04,000 but I feel like that's something from 33 00:01:04,083 --> 00:01:06,167 my childhood that I feel like definitely 34 00:01:06,292 --> 00:01:08,833 has carried into adulthood. 35 00:01:08,958 --> 00:01:10,708 ♪ ♪ 36 00:01:10,875 --> 00:01:12,875 - Nicole and Chris. 37 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:14,167 - [cackles] 38 00:01:14,333 --> 00:01:16,333 Let me twirl my "moo-stache." 39 00:01:16,500 --> 00:01:18,000 - You gotta work on the laugh, though. 40 00:01:18,125 --> 00:01:20,250 - The fact that he doesn't judge me 41 00:01:20,375 --> 00:01:23,458 and I'm not embarrassed or afraid at all that he'll think 42 00:01:23,542 --> 00:01:25,250 it's weird I think is amazing, 43 00:01:25,375 --> 00:01:28,542 because I've never felt this way before. 44 00:01:28,667 --> 00:01:30,167 - Kirsten and Shaquille. 45 00:01:32,875 --> 00:01:34,125 So-- 46 00:01:34,208 --> 00:01:37,000 - OK, you want to be married to them? 47 00:01:37,125 --> 00:01:38,667 - Shaquille, I don't want you to overthink it, 48 00:01:38,792 --> 00:01:40,583 and I don't want you to put that kind of pressure 49 00:01:40,708 --> 00:01:42,083 on yourself. 50 00:01:42,208 --> 00:01:43,292 We're gonna-- we're gonna be great. 51 00:01:43,375 --> 00:01:44,667 ♪ ♪ 52 00:01:44,792 --> 00:01:45,833 - ♪ Let's get it ♪ 53 00:01:45,917 --> 00:01:46,750 ♪ Let's go ♪ 54 00:01:46,875 --> 00:01:48,625 - Oh. 55 00:01:48,708 --> 00:01:51,417 - And tonight our couples must explore intimacy 56 00:01:51,542 --> 00:01:54,167 in order to form a greater foundation of trust 57 00:01:54,292 --> 00:01:55,375 in their marriage. 58 00:01:55,500 --> 00:01:57,000 - Who knows? 59 00:01:57,125 --> 00:01:58,833 We might Amazon a damn sex chair after all this. 60 00:01:58,958 --> 00:02:00,583 - I might have one. - Damn, Gina. 61 00:02:00,708 --> 00:02:01,667 - [laughs] 62 00:02:01,792 --> 00:02:02,833 - Do you have control? 63 00:02:02,958 --> 00:02:04,667 - No, I don't have any control. 64 00:02:04,750 --> 00:02:09,250 Each activity, step by step, is drawing us closer. 65 00:02:09,375 --> 00:02:10,958 - Do you feel like you're getting your needs met? 66 00:02:11,042 --> 00:02:13,083 - Um, no. 67 00:02:13,208 --> 00:02:14,083 I ain't trying to be your friend. 68 00:02:14,208 --> 00:02:15,917 I'm trying to be your wife. 69 00:02:16,042 --> 00:02:17,583 - I'm not gonna beg you. 70 00:02:17,708 --> 00:02:19,625 - I don't want you to keep feeling like this. 71 00:02:19,708 --> 00:02:21,167 ♪ ♪ 72 00:02:21,333 --> 00:02:24,875 - I didn't realize I had so many issues. 73 00:02:25,042 --> 00:02:26,458 I say them out loud. 74 00:02:26,542 --> 00:02:29,875 I'm like, wow, you are really [bleep] up. 75 00:02:30,042 --> 00:02:31,292 - I think I'm just at a point where 76 00:02:31,375 --> 00:02:32,708 I'm at my breaking point. 77 00:02:32,833 --> 00:02:36,000 ♪ ♪ 78 00:02:36,083 --> 00:02:38,208 - ♪ It's all or nothing ♪ 79 00:02:38,333 --> 00:02:40,833 - This is "Married at First Sight." 80 00:02:40,958 --> 00:02:44,167 - ♪ There's no other way ♪ 81 00:02:44,292 --> 00:02:46,500 ♪ It's all or nothing ♪ 82 00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:50,417 - ♪ I'm floating like a dream through the city lights ♪ 83 00:02:50,542 --> 00:02:54,458 ♪ ♪ 84 00:02:54,583 --> 00:02:56,292 - Good morning. - Good morning. 85 00:02:56,375 --> 00:02:57,875 - Lookit, she looks beautiful, even in the mornings. 86 00:02:58,000 --> 00:02:59,667 - Mm. Thank you, sweetheart. 87 00:02:59,792 --> 00:03:00,708 - No makeup needed. 88 00:03:00,833 --> 00:03:02,083 No makeup necessary. 89 00:03:02,208 --> 00:03:07,167 - Down, whisper, 90 00:03:07,250 --> 00:03:10,333 up, shake, shake. 91 00:03:10,458 --> 00:03:11,250 - He's whispering. - Still whispering. 92 00:03:11,375 --> 00:03:12,458 - [laughs] - Shake. 93 00:03:12,542 --> 00:03:14,833 Yeah, pound. 94 00:03:14,958 --> 00:03:21,333 - Shaquille is so exhausted, and he's all packed up, 95 00:03:21,500 --> 00:03:25,333 because he has to go to Memphis to work and to do 96 00:03:25,417 --> 00:03:30,583 some workshops and recruit all these students for fall 2023. 97 00:03:30,708 --> 00:03:33,458 Is that right? 98 00:03:33,542 --> 00:03:37,958 - I don't really know, like, emotionally and mentally, 99 00:03:38,083 --> 00:03:40,167 like, my headspace, honestly. 100 00:03:40,292 --> 00:03:44,083 I have been so, like, 101 00:03:44,208 --> 00:03:46,792 open and optimistic about everything 102 00:03:46,875 --> 00:03:48,542 in this process. 103 00:03:48,708 --> 00:03:54,042 I'm really trying to not start to put all these guards up, 104 00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:56,917 but I definitely have guards up now. 105 00:03:57,042 --> 00:03:59,708 I'm concerned, but I'm hopeful. 106 00:03:59,875 --> 00:04:03,458 So although I'm not in a space that I want to be in, 107 00:04:03,542 --> 00:04:07,292 I'm hopeful that by the end of this I can be in that space, 108 00:04:07,375 --> 00:04:08,667 and so can Airris. 109 00:04:08,792 --> 00:04:11,333 We both, you know, deserve to be happy. 110 00:04:11,458 --> 00:04:14,667 - ♪ Chasing my destiny ♪ 111 00:04:14,833 --> 00:04:17,833 - So my-- my mom told me about this thing she got in her 112 00:04:17,917 --> 00:04:19,833 house that she really likes, and I thought it'd be 113 00:04:19,917 --> 00:04:21,000 fun if we could try it. 114 00:04:21,083 --> 00:04:22,167 - Yeah. 115 00:04:22,333 --> 00:04:23,167 - But we have to install it. 116 00:04:23,292 --> 00:04:25,083 - OK. 117 00:04:25,208 --> 00:04:26,167 - Come on, I'll show you. 118 00:04:26,292 --> 00:04:27,333 - All right. 119 00:04:27,458 --> 00:04:28,333 - It's a surprise. 120 00:04:28,458 --> 00:04:30,167 - I mean, in a sense, yes, I-- 121 00:04:30,292 --> 00:04:32,000 I pictured this for married life, 122 00:04:32,125 --> 00:04:34,417 in the-- in the sense that we got home projects that we're 123 00:04:34,542 --> 00:04:35,917 gonna work on together. 124 00:04:36,042 --> 00:04:36,833 And we want to be able to include-- 125 00:04:36,917 --> 00:04:38,250 include each other. 126 00:04:38,375 --> 00:04:39,833 We don't want to have to get to a point 127 00:04:39,958 --> 00:04:40,917 where it's like she's gonna do her thing, 128 00:04:41,042 --> 00:04:42,625 I'm gonna do my thing. 129 00:04:42,708 --> 00:04:43,667 We want to be involved with each other in everything 130 00:04:43,792 --> 00:04:45,167 that we do. 131 00:04:45,333 --> 00:04:47,792 - So this is what we have to install. 132 00:04:47,875 --> 00:04:48,750 - OK, a bidet. 133 00:04:48,875 --> 00:04:49,958 - It's a bidet. 134 00:04:50,042 --> 00:04:51,083 - All right. 135 00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:52,292 - Have you ever used a bidet? 136 00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:53,500 - No, I have not. 137 00:04:53,667 --> 00:04:55,333 - I think bidets are really cool. 138 00:04:55,458 --> 00:04:57,000 I mean, you got a nice, clean tushy, 139 00:04:57,083 --> 00:04:58,500 and Chris has never used one. 140 00:04:58,583 --> 00:05:01,458 And we unexpectedly get intimate sometimes. 141 00:05:01,583 --> 00:05:04,167 So it would be nice to always have a fresh tushy 142 00:05:04,250 --> 00:05:05,833 if you haven't just freshly showered. 143 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:07,667 - See, I'm not afraid to use instructions because-- 144 00:05:07,792 --> 00:05:09,667 - Well, that's good because if we install this wrong, 145 00:05:09,833 --> 00:05:11,958 imagine it goes up the wrong hole. 146 00:05:12,083 --> 00:05:15,208 ♪ ♪ 147 00:05:15,375 --> 00:05:17,250 No, we're having fun. 148 00:05:17,375 --> 00:05:19,208 Let me have fun with my toilet. 149 00:05:19,333 --> 00:05:22,958 ♪ ♪ 150 00:05:23,083 --> 00:05:24,042 - There we go. 151 00:05:24,167 --> 00:05:25,792 And I think we're done. 152 00:05:25,917 --> 00:05:27,042 - All right, now why don't you get out so I can use it? 153 00:05:27,167 --> 00:05:29,333 - All right, sounds good. 154 00:05:29,458 --> 00:05:32,875 - Testing, testing the bidet. 155 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:37,625 Putting it on rear cleaning mode, and, ah, OK. 156 00:05:37,750 --> 00:05:39,333 - I thought you used one of these before. 157 00:05:39,458 --> 00:05:41,125 You sound like a beginner. 158 00:05:41,250 --> 00:05:44,083 - Yeah, but not with my husband listening. 159 00:05:44,208 --> 00:05:46,333 - Do you feel like this is another level of intimacy? 160 00:05:46,458 --> 00:05:48,167 - This is really intimate. 161 00:05:48,333 --> 00:05:49,708 You're listening to me clean my tushy right now. 162 00:05:49,875 --> 00:05:50,833 Ooh. 163 00:05:50,917 --> 00:05:52,417 - I am. 164 00:05:52,542 --> 00:05:54,250 She's a tough New Yorker. 165 00:05:54,375 --> 00:05:57,083 She can handle a little water up her butt, but me, 166 00:05:57,208 --> 00:05:58,167 I don't know; wish me luck. 167 00:05:58,292 --> 00:05:59,125 - Good luck, babe. 168 00:05:59,250 --> 00:06:00,667 You got this. 169 00:06:00,792 --> 00:06:03,208 Clean that tushy. 170 00:06:03,375 --> 00:06:05,333 And make sure to start off with the first level, 171 00:06:05,458 --> 00:06:08,500 because you don't want to come in hot. 172 00:06:08,625 --> 00:06:09,750 - Ah! 173 00:06:09,875 --> 00:06:12,167 [laughs] 174 00:06:12,292 --> 00:06:13,500 It's not just a little spray. 175 00:06:13,625 --> 00:06:14,875 It's literally right up and in it. 176 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:16,792 I feel so violated. 177 00:06:16,875 --> 00:06:19,500 Oh, that was intense. 178 00:06:19,625 --> 00:06:22,833 - That was intimate and supportive and teamwork, 179 00:06:22,958 --> 00:06:25,542 and honestly, it turned me on a little bit that you 180 00:06:25,667 --> 00:06:27,208 could put something together-- - Thanks. 181 00:06:27,375 --> 00:06:28,833 - --and you were willing to do something 182 00:06:28,917 --> 00:06:30,833 silly to make me happy. 183 00:06:30,958 --> 00:06:32,958 - Anything for a clean tushy for you, honey. 184 00:06:33,042 --> 00:06:34,417 - Thank you, baby. 185 00:06:34,542 --> 00:06:35,792 - I feel like the toilet made me its bitch. 186 00:06:35,917 --> 00:06:40,125 [laughs] Like, I'm not even joking. 187 00:06:40,250 --> 00:06:42,125 - ♪ I'm feeling good ♪ 188 00:06:42,250 --> 00:06:43,708 ♪ Yeah ♪ 189 00:06:43,875 --> 00:06:47,000 [knock at door] 190 00:06:47,125 --> 00:06:48,333 - Hello. - Hey, hey, how are you? 191 00:06:48,458 --> 00:06:49,667 - Hi, I'm Dr. Pia. 192 00:06:49,792 --> 00:06:50,708 Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. 193 00:06:50,875 --> 00:06:52,125 Shaquille. 194 00:06:52,250 --> 00:06:53,833 - We're bringing Dr. Pia back to help 195 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,542 our couples with trust and intimacy in their marriage. 196 00:06:56,708 --> 00:06:58,500 Pia has been brought up to speed on everything. 197 00:06:58,583 --> 00:07:01,708 She's here to help our couples find out how they can 198 00:07:01,833 --> 00:07:05,375 create better intimacy but also to learn how they can 199 00:07:05,542 --> 00:07:07,542 connect on a visceral level. 200 00:07:07,667 --> 00:07:10,542 Because with just over two weeks left until Decision Day, 201 00:07:10,708 --> 00:07:12,500 it can be the difference between staying 202 00:07:12,625 --> 00:07:14,333 married and getting a divorce. 203 00:07:14,458 --> 00:07:18,833 ♪ ♪ 204 00:07:18,958 --> 00:07:19,792 [knocking at door] 205 00:07:19,875 --> 00:07:21,042 - Hello. - Hi. 206 00:07:21,167 --> 00:07:22,250 - Hi. - I'm Dr. Pia. 207 00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:23,292 Nice to meet you. - I'm Clint. 208 00:07:23,375 --> 00:07:24,625 Nice to meet you. 209 00:07:24,708 --> 00:07:26,292 - Oh. - Oh, who's this? 210 00:07:26,375 --> 00:07:27,333 - This is Hank. 211 00:07:27,500 --> 00:07:28,542 - Hi, Hank. 212 00:07:28,667 --> 00:07:29,917 - Come on in. - Hi, Hank. 213 00:07:30,042 --> 00:07:31,292 - Easy, bud. 214 00:07:31,417 --> 00:07:32,542 How's it going? - Good. 215 00:07:32,708 --> 00:07:34,250 How about you guys? - Good. 216 00:07:34,375 --> 00:07:35,500 - Good. - Hi, Hank. 217 00:07:35,625 --> 00:07:37,167 Well, how have things been going? 218 00:07:37,292 --> 00:07:38,292 - Yeah, good. - Good, yeah. 219 00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:39,625 - Yeah, yeah. 220 00:07:39,750 --> 00:07:42,583 - OK, what's been making it good? 221 00:07:42,708 --> 00:07:45,458 - Jeez, our communication is excellent. 222 00:07:45,542 --> 00:07:47,375 We're growing in our relationship. 223 00:07:47,542 --> 00:07:49,417 You know, we just get along really well, so-- 224 00:07:49,542 --> 00:07:51,250 - OK, do you agree, Gina? 225 00:07:51,375 --> 00:07:52,750 - I do, yeah. 226 00:07:52,875 --> 00:07:54,250 I mean, from a marriage standpoint, 227 00:07:54,375 --> 00:07:55,958 not-- we're not really-- 228 00:07:56,083 --> 00:07:58,125 we don't feel married, but things are going well 229 00:07:58,208 --> 00:08:00,917 in the regard of, like, getting to know one another 230 00:08:01,042 --> 00:08:03,000 and building that, like, friendship foundation, 231 00:08:03,125 --> 00:08:04,958 I guess. 232 00:08:05,042 --> 00:08:06,250 - OK, why do you think you guys don't feel, like, connected 233 00:08:06,375 --> 00:08:07,875 like a married couple? 234 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,042 - Well, we've got-- 235 00:08:09,167 --> 00:08:10,792 we've got a physical barrier. 236 00:08:10,917 --> 00:08:13,667 - There's just no real, like, draw to flirt, 237 00:08:13,792 --> 00:08:16,667 or hold hands, or kiss, or any of that. 238 00:08:16,750 --> 00:08:21,083 - What typically creates that draw for you? 239 00:08:21,208 --> 00:08:22,958 - Honestly, I'm not sure. 240 00:08:23,083 --> 00:08:25,667 I feel like I've typically just been aligned with someone 241 00:08:25,792 --> 00:08:27,917 and it's just easily been there. 242 00:08:28,042 --> 00:08:30,167 I've never really, like, sat down and thought about it. 243 00:08:30,333 --> 00:08:31,792 - What about for you, Clint? 244 00:08:31,917 --> 00:08:33,542 - Yeah, I mean, typically, the way it happens 245 00:08:33,708 --> 00:08:35,833 is just when I see somebody, I'm just like, 246 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:40,250 there's that unquantified part to it where I'm like, 247 00:08:40,375 --> 00:08:43,042 I want to be sexually, like, attracted and want to move 248 00:08:43,208 --> 00:08:45,500 forward in that capacity, so-- 249 00:08:45,667 --> 00:08:47,167 - Do you all have sexual desires 250 00:08:47,333 --> 00:08:48,417 independent of one another? 251 00:08:48,542 --> 00:08:50,083 - Yeah. 252 00:08:50,208 --> 00:08:51,333 - OK, what was that reaction that you just had? 253 00:08:51,458 --> 00:08:52,875 - No, I did. 254 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,000 That was just a very confident reaction. 255 00:08:54,083 --> 00:08:55,125 Yeah. - OK. 256 00:08:55,208 --> 00:08:56,500 - I mean, yeah, for sure. 257 00:08:56,625 --> 00:09:00,417 - OK, and how are you fulfilling that? 258 00:09:00,542 --> 00:09:01,333 - Fulfilling our sexual desires? 259 00:09:01,417 --> 00:09:02,500 - Mm-hmm. 260 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:03,708 - I mean, obviously on our own. 261 00:09:03,875 --> 00:09:04,917 [laughter] 262 00:09:05,042 --> 00:09:06,583 - OK. 263 00:09:06,708 --> 00:09:07,917 - It's an independent exercise at this moment. 264 00:09:08,042 --> 00:09:08,958 - Uh-huh. 265 00:09:09,083 --> 00:09:10,375 Do you all talk about it? 266 00:09:10,542 --> 00:09:12,375 - No, because we're-- we don't have any 267 00:09:12,500 --> 00:09:14,208 sexual desire for one another. 268 00:09:14,333 --> 00:09:16,958 So I feel like that'd be pretty awkward to talk about that. 269 00:09:17,083 --> 00:09:18,167 - How do y'all think you're gonna 270 00:09:18,292 --> 00:09:20,083 foster this sexual desire? 271 00:09:20,208 --> 00:09:23,208 - I mean, I was hoping that it would happen more organically. 272 00:09:23,333 --> 00:09:25,542 - Everything takes work, everything. 273 00:09:25,708 --> 00:09:27,167 Every relationship is different. 274 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:28,833 So even though sometimes there might have been, like, 275 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:31,542 instant sexual chemistry with someone else, 276 00:09:31,708 --> 00:09:35,458 if you're making this decision to be married, right, 277 00:09:35,583 --> 00:09:37,792 do we not have to put forth similar effort into 278 00:09:37,917 --> 00:09:39,667 the intimate side of things? 279 00:09:39,792 --> 00:09:40,958 In order for something to grow, you have to water it. 280 00:09:41,042 --> 00:09:42,417 - But we are watering it. - Right. 281 00:09:42,542 --> 00:09:44,333 How? How are you allowing intimacy-- 282 00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:45,375 - We're spending time-- yeah, we're covering all the other 283 00:09:45,542 --> 00:09:46,750 bases of the intimacy. 284 00:09:46,875 --> 00:09:47,792 - But you're not talking about intimacy. 285 00:09:47,917 --> 00:09:49,583 You're not talking about sex. 286 00:09:49,708 --> 00:09:51,292 That doesn't sound like watering it to me at all. 287 00:09:51,417 --> 00:09:53,833 - Oh, yeah, that just grosses me out to talk about that. 288 00:09:53,958 --> 00:09:54,833 - OK. 289 00:09:54,958 --> 00:09:56,375 - Yeah. 290 00:09:56,500 --> 00:09:57,708 - So there is some discomfort that there is 291 00:09:57,875 --> 00:09:59,542 around intimacy and sex then. 292 00:09:59,667 --> 00:10:00,833 - No, not necessarily. 293 00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:02,917 I just don't-- 294 00:10:03,042 --> 00:10:05,542 I don't have the desire to talk about sex and intimacy 295 00:10:05,708 --> 00:10:07,500 with someone that I don't have the desire 296 00:10:07,625 --> 00:10:08,583 to talk to about it. 297 00:10:08,708 --> 00:10:10,000 I don't know. 298 00:10:10,083 --> 00:10:11,292 - How do you think the marriage is 299 00:10:11,417 --> 00:10:13,417 gonna last without having sex? 300 00:10:13,542 --> 00:10:16,292 - I don't-- I don't know if it is gonna last. 301 00:10:16,375 --> 00:10:17,583 - OK, what do you think? 302 00:10:17,708 --> 00:10:19,000 - Yeah, I mean-- 303 00:10:19,125 --> 00:10:21,167 - I mean, I think he agrees with that. 304 00:10:21,292 --> 00:10:23,875 - Well, let him talk. 305 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:27,167 - I mean, the sexual component has to be there in a marriage. 306 00:10:27,333 --> 00:10:29,875 So yeah, it's a challenge for us. 307 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,833 - Mm-hmm. 308 00:10:31,917 --> 00:10:34,250 Something that's important with intimacy and sex in general 309 00:10:34,375 --> 00:10:35,667 is the context. 310 00:10:35,792 --> 00:10:37,833 And I'm curious if we can discuss what 311 00:10:37,958 --> 00:10:40,583 might be other contextual factors that might 312 00:10:40,708 --> 00:10:42,750 help spark desire or arousal. 313 00:10:42,875 --> 00:10:44,500 Like, could it be mood? 314 00:10:44,625 --> 00:10:46,167 Could it be, OK, I just got out of the shower 315 00:10:46,333 --> 00:10:49,417 and put on some really good-smelling lotion? 316 00:10:49,542 --> 00:10:50,958 - I'm a big scent guy. 317 00:10:51,042 --> 00:10:52,833 - OK. 318 00:10:52,958 --> 00:10:56,417 - So you know, I've got the whole plethora of colognes, 319 00:10:56,542 --> 00:10:57,875 and so that's something that, 320 00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:01,042 you know, I'm very much attracted to, you know, like, 321 00:11:01,208 --> 00:11:02,542 a sexy scent. 322 00:11:02,708 --> 00:11:04,250 - What would you define as, like, a sexy scent? 323 00:11:04,375 --> 00:11:05,667 - Oh god, just like-- like-- 324 00:11:05,792 --> 00:11:06,792 - I'm like, where's your cologne at? 325 00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:08,875 - --like, rich vanilla. 326 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:11,167 - OK, so, like, vanilla, not floral, but yeah, like-- 327 00:11:11,250 --> 00:11:12,542 - Yeah. - OK. 328 00:11:12,667 --> 00:11:13,750 - Yeah. - I would say similar things. 329 00:11:13,875 --> 00:11:14,917 I mean, definitely smell. 330 00:11:15,042 --> 00:11:16,500 Like, I love a good cologne. 331 00:11:16,583 --> 00:11:18,250 - Mm-hmm. 332 00:11:18,375 --> 00:11:20,958 - Music, for sure, but just for, like, attraction, 333 00:11:21,083 --> 00:11:23,083 I would say definitely, like, style, too. 334 00:11:23,208 --> 00:11:25,000 Like, typically, like, a little bit 335 00:11:25,167 --> 00:11:27,667 of swag, those types of things have been attractive for me. 336 00:11:27,792 --> 00:11:29,667 - OK, do you feel like Clint has swag? 337 00:11:29,792 --> 00:11:31,167 - I don't know that Clint has swag. 338 00:11:31,292 --> 00:11:33,333 - OK. 339 00:11:33,500 --> 00:11:34,500 - Interesting. 340 00:11:34,667 --> 00:11:35,958 - OK, what do you make of that? 341 00:11:36,083 --> 00:11:37,667 - Interesting. 342 00:11:37,792 --> 00:11:40,000 Oh, I mean, I've been quantified as, 343 00:11:40,083 --> 00:11:41,292 like, the king of swag, so-- - Oh, OK. 344 00:11:41,375 --> 00:11:42,333 - Really? 345 00:11:42,500 --> 00:11:43,500 - That's like-- yeah. 346 00:11:43,625 --> 00:11:44,667 - OK. 347 00:11:44,750 --> 00:11:45,750 - This is just my loungewear. 348 00:11:45,875 --> 00:11:47,583 - This is your loungewear. 349 00:11:47,708 --> 00:11:48,792 - It's fine, but if I got to dial that needle up, 350 00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:50,292 I've got the apparel to do it. 351 00:11:50,375 --> 00:11:51,917 - OK. 352 00:11:52,042 --> 00:11:54,458 - Yeah, Senor Swag is actually my title. 353 00:11:54,583 --> 00:11:58,167 - All right, so let's work on setting up the context. 354 00:11:58,333 --> 00:12:02,167 So for example, could you see yourself getting the house 355 00:12:02,292 --> 00:12:06,500 smelling of vanilla and spice and playing, like, 356 00:12:06,625 --> 00:12:09,875 a good playlist that would generally get you in the mood 357 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:14,000 without the expectation of it leading to sex? 358 00:12:14,083 --> 00:12:15,917 - Yeah, I mean, I can do that. 359 00:12:16,042 --> 00:12:17,708 - OK. 360 00:12:17,833 --> 00:12:19,583 - But I don't know if it's gonna get us in the mood. 361 00:12:19,708 --> 00:12:22,458 - I just said without the expectation. 362 00:12:22,583 --> 00:12:25,500 - I know, but still-- no, I get what the end result is. 363 00:12:25,667 --> 00:12:27,292 - Oh my god. 364 00:12:27,375 --> 00:12:28,708 - Don't worry about the end result. Like, this is-- 365 00:12:28,833 --> 00:12:30,250 - I'm worried about the end result. 366 00:12:30,375 --> 00:12:31,917 - And this is what's gonna be the downfall. 367 00:12:32,042 --> 00:12:33,333 - That's the whole problem is the end result. 368 00:12:33,458 --> 00:12:34,875 - Yes. - That's the problem. 369 00:12:35,042 --> 00:12:36,583 We've got to get the focus off of the end result 370 00:12:36,708 --> 00:12:38,250 because you're putting additional pressure 371 00:12:38,375 --> 00:12:39,292 on to being intimate. 372 00:12:39,417 --> 00:12:40,667 - OK. 373 00:12:40,750 --> 00:12:42,167 - So when people come into my office 374 00:12:42,333 --> 00:12:43,708 and they have these concerns, what do I do? 375 00:12:43,875 --> 00:12:45,417 I assign them homework to do just that. 376 00:12:45,542 --> 00:12:47,125 - Mm-hmm 377 00:12:47,208 --> 00:12:48,667 - And so it's not like, go home and just have sex. 378 00:12:48,792 --> 00:12:50,000 We take baby steps into it because you 379 00:12:50,125 --> 00:12:51,125 do have to feel comfortable. 380 00:12:51,250 --> 00:12:52,667 - Sure. 381 00:12:52,792 --> 00:12:54,333 - Because the idea behind the exercise 382 00:12:54,500 --> 00:12:57,875 is to take away the pressure and to take away expectations. 383 00:12:58,042 --> 00:13:00,292 And it's hard to do that because we can get distracted 384 00:13:00,375 --> 00:13:02,042 by our thoughts, the thoughts that y'all are having 385 00:13:02,167 --> 00:13:04,083 of, like, not attracted, not happening, 386 00:13:04,208 --> 00:13:07,083 we're not there yet, or, like, all the reasons why not to. 387 00:13:07,208 --> 00:13:12,333 And so if we have your focus go on to the sensation of what 388 00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:15,125 you're feeling in terms of touch, and, you know, 389 00:13:15,250 --> 00:13:17,500 it doesn't have to be, like, in an erogenous zone. 390 00:13:17,625 --> 00:13:19,833 I wouldn't even recommend that, OK? 391 00:13:19,958 --> 00:13:22,417 It could be, like, on the arm and just 392 00:13:22,542 --> 00:13:23,833 seeing what touch is like. 393 00:13:23,958 --> 00:13:25,042 - Yeah, fair enough. 394 00:13:25,208 --> 00:13:26,500 - Fair enough. 395 00:13:26,625 --> 00:13:28,000 - Clint and I haven't really talked 396 00:13:28,125 --> 00:13:31,708 about our physical attraction at all 397 00:13:31,875 --> 00:13:33,375 really since the honeymoon. 398 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:36,625 So it definitely puts the pressure on again 399 00:13:36,750 --> 00:13:39,000 for us to have to step into something that 400 00:13:39,125 --> 00:13:41,167 feels uncomfortable for us. 401 00:13:41,292 --> 00:13:44,167 ♪ ♪ 402 00:13:47,917 --> 00:13:50,792 [upbeat music] 403 00:13:50,875 --> 00:13:52,542 ♪ ♪ 404 00:13:52,708 --> 00:13:54,042 - Hi, I'm Jasmine. - Nice to meet you. 405 00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:55,625 I'm Dr. Pia. 406 00:13:55,708 --> 00:13:56,375 - Nice to meet you. - Hi, how you doing? 407 00:13:56,542 --> 00:13:57,667 - Hi. Dr. Pia. 408 00:13:57,792 --> 00:13:58,667 Nice to meet you. - Airris. 409 00:13:58,792 --> 00:13:59,833 - Nice to meet you. 410 00:13:59,917 --> 00:14:00,750 Where are we go-- oh, here? 411 00:14:00,875 --> 00:14:02,000 - We're right here. 412 00:14:02,083 --> 00:14:03,750 - All right, cool. - Over here. 413 00:14:03,875 --> 00:14:10,292 All right, well, how have things been going? 414 00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:12,000 - It's probably not like either one of us, 415 00:14:12,125 --> 00:14:14,167 you know, had envisioned before coming into this, 416 00:14:14,292 --> 00:14:16,875 but, you know, that's part of the risk you take, 417 00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:19,000 you know, signing up to marry a complete stranger. 418 00:14:19,125 --> 00:14:20,667 - Right. 419 00:14:20,792 --> 00:14:23,500 Is it something you feel like can change? 420 00:14:23,625 --> 00:14:26,083 - That's why we're both still here today, you know? 421 00:14:26,208 --> 00:14:28,417 I guess if we felt like it was inevitable, 422 00:14:28,542 --> 00:14:30,875 we would have told them we ready for Decision Day 423 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,458 and got up out of here. 424 00:14:32,583 --> 00:14:35,500 - OK, do you feel like you're getting your needs met? 425 00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:38,167 - Um, no. 426 00:14:38,292 --> 00:14:41,292 With, you know, having him, who's not really 427 00:14:41,375 --> 00:14:43,417 sexually attracted to me, we don't really 428 00:14:43,542 --> 00:14:44,833 have any physical touch. 429 00:14:44,958 --> 00:14:46,667 So it's kind of like that's something 430 00:14:46,833 --> 00:14:48,125 in a relationship I'm used to getting 431 00:14:48,250 --> 00:14:49,500 and something that I actually need. 432 00:14:49,625 --> 00:14:51,167 - Mm-hmm. - So-- 433 00:14:51,250 --> 00:14:52,833 - Do you guys feel like there's a friendship here? 434 00:14:52,958 --> 00:14:54,167 - Yes. - Yes. 435 00:14:54,250 --> 00:14:55,917 - OK, you said that pretty quickly. 436 00:14:56,042 --> 00:14:59,000 - Yeah, he friend-zoned me on the honeymoon. 437 00:14:59,167 --> 00:15:01,083 - OK, so that sounds like there's 438 00:15:01,208 --> 00:15:02,583 a negative connotation. 439 00:15:02,708 --> 00:15:03,625 - I ain't trying to be your friend. 440 00:15:03,708 --> 00:15:05,500 I'm trying to be your wife. 441 00:15:05,625 --> 00:15:07,542 It's like, when you see me, like, are you happy to see me? 442 00:15:07,667 --> 00:15:08,833 Like, you gonna hug me? - Mm. 443 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:10,500 - You gonna-- like-- 444 00:15:10,667 --> 00:15:12,167 like, I can't tell you the last time I hugged him. 445 00:15:12,292 --> 00:15:13,875 - You don't even want to hug her? 446 00:15:14,042 --> 00:15:16,042 - Yes, I do, but, like, I guess the longer it 447 00:15:16,208 --> 00:15:18,542 goes without being done, like, the more 448 00:15:18,708 --> 00:15:20,833 awkward that it feels. 449 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,292 All the other things are cool, but, like, this-- 450 00:15:23,417 --> 00:15:28,792 it's such, like, a big issue, and we got to get around this. 451 00:15:28,917 --> 00:15:30,917 - Part of being intimate is having 452 00:15:31,042 --> 00:15:32,833 great conversation, good conversation, 453 00:15:32,917 --> 00:15:34,500 talking for a long period of time. 454 00:15:34,625 --> 00:15:36,083 - Yeah. 455 00:15:36,208 --> 00:15:38,167 - That's not happening now with the two of you? 456 00:15:38,250 --> 00:15:41,000 - Like, we talk, you know, but it's not like, man, 457 00:15:41,083 --> 00:15:43,208 that conversation me and Jasmine had last Tuesday, 458 00:15:43,375 --> 00:15:44,667 it really hit. 459 00:15:44,792 --> 00:15:46,167 Like, it's not like, you know, I don't think we've had 460 00:15:46,333 --> 00:15:47,833 any of those, like, type of moments. 461 00:15:47,917 --> 00:15:49,667 - Mm-hmm. 462 00:15:49,792 --> 00:15:52,125 Jasmine, do you feel like you're holding back from him? 463 00:15:52,208 --> 00:15:53,125 - No. 464 00:15:53,208 --> 00:15:54,500 - No? 465 00:15:54,625 --> 00:15:57,333 Do you feel like you're forthcoming with him? 466 00:15:57,458 --> 00:15:58,250 - Yeah. 467 00:15:58,375 --> 00:16:00,000 - OK. 468 00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:01,750 - I mean, probably in the beginning of this, 469 00:16:01,875 --> 00:16:06,667 I was probably a lot more open, but I feel like I have started 470 00:16:06,792 --> 00:16:08,167 to get a little guarded. 471 00:16:08,250 --> 00:16:10,208 But I don't feel like I'm, like, holding 472 00:16:10,333 --> 00:16:11,833 back from conversation, no. 473 00:16:11,917 --> 00:16:14,292 - OK, do you feel like you're holding 474 00:16:14,417 --> 00:16:16,458 back from, like, volunteering information to him or-- 475 00:16:16,542 --> 00:16:17,833 - I think so. 476 00:16:17,958 --> 00:16:19,417 Yeah, I think that would be a more-- 477 00:16:19,542 --> 00:16:21,750 - I'm getting the sense that you're, like, 478 00:16:21,875 --> 00:16:25,000 being agreeable with him, like, not trying to stir the pot too 479 00:16:25,083 --> 00:16:26,375 much, and, like, holding back from what 480 00:16:26,500 --> 00:16:28,333 it is that, like, you want or that you 481 00:16:28,417 --> 00:16:31,500 like, like, trying to just kind of, like, keep the peace. 482 00:16:31,625 --> 00:16:32,875 I see you shaking your head. 483 00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,458 Is that how you're experiencing her? 484 00:16:34,542 --> 00:16:35,833 - No, I agree. - OK. 485 00:16:35,958 --> 00:16:37,333 - That I'm being agreeable? 486 00:16:37,417 --> 00:16:39,167 - Sometimes if someone ask you something, like, 487 00:16:39,250 --> 00:16:42,333 it's not your real, full feeling. 488 00:16:42,417 --> 00:16:45,333 Like, you just-- after we talked to Dr. Pepper 489 00:16:45,458 --> 00:16:47,875 about, like, you know, diving deep, having a conversation, 490 00:16:48,042 --> 00:16:50,292 we did the exercise where we pulled 491 00:16:50,417 --> 00:16:51,958 the questions out of the jar. 492 00:16:52,042 --> 00:16:54,000 And then, like, the next day, 493 00:16:54,125 --> 00:16:58,583 we were on the couch for, like, two hours just chilling. 494 00:16:58,708 --> 00:17:02,333 I was asking typical, like, first-date questions, like, 495 00:17:02,458 --> 00:17:04,292 but it was just to spark the conversation. 496 00:17:04,375 --> 00:17:06,583 But I'm probing, and I'm asking questions, 497 00:17:06,708 --> 00:17:09,667 but I wasn't receiving any, like, questions or feedback. 498 00:17:09,792 --> 00:17:12,750 ♪ ♪ 499 00:17:12,875 --> 00:17:14,000 - He gets very sarcastic. 500 00:17:14,083 --> 00:17:15,708 He gets very like-- 501 00:17:15,833 --> 00:17:17,875 makes me feel like-- like he don't want to be there. 502 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:19,333 He don't. 503 00:17:19,417 --> 00:17:20,875 So I really just felt like he was just 504 00:17:21,042 --> 00:17:22,500 asking these questions to pass the time. 505 00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:24,292 I didn't really feel like when I was answering, 506 00:17:24,417 --> 00:17:26,292 he really cared what I was saying. 507 00:17:26,417 --> 00:17:28,708 Like, it was just kind of like, let me ask you these questions 508 00:17:28,875 --> 00:17:30,708 to make the time pass. 509 00:17:30,833 --> 00:17:32,917 - When she calls you out, how did you feel about that, her, 510 00:17:33,042 --> 00:17:35,750 like, challenging you then in that way? 511 00:17:35,875 --> 00:17:37,333 - Oh, I love it. 512 00:17:37,458 --> 00:17:38,958 - This is what's gonna turn him on. 513 00:17:39,042 --> 00:17:39,958 - Oh my gosh. 514 00:17:40,083 --> 00:17:40,917 - I got his number. 515 00:17:41,042 --> 00:17:41,958 I got his number. 516 00:17:42,083 --> 00:17:43,083 He needs you-- 517 00:17:43,208 --> 00:17:44,625 - Oh my word. 518 00:17:44,750 --> 00:17:46,167 - --to initiate and take more of the charge. 519 00:17:46,292 --> 00:17:47,958 What is the "oh my word" about? 520 00:17:48,083 --> 00:17:50,000 - I just-- I guess I wasn't expecting that. 521 00:17:50,125 --> 00:17:51,833 - Mm-hmm, so calling you out in the moment 522 00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:54,167 when you're being uninviting? 523 00:17:54,292 --> 00:17:56,042 - Right, anything, yeah. 524 00:17:56,167 --> 00:17:59,208 - OK, I can try. 525 00:17:59,375 --> 00:18:02,042 - OK, because we've got to, like, spark some sort 526 00:18:02,167 --> 00:18:04,083 of interest, chemistry here. 527 00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:06,125 - ♪ Love is a game ♪ 528 00:18:06,208 --> 00:18:08,458 ♪ Since ever, the same ♪ 529 00:18:08,583 --> 00:18:11,208 ♪ ♪ 530 00:18:11,375 --> 00:18:12,875 - All right, well, cheers. 531 00:18:13,042 --> 00:18:14,458 - Cheers to getting-- 532 00:18:14,583 --> 00:18:15,583 - "Physi-cal." 533 00:18:15,708 --> 00:18:17,000 - --getting "physi-cal." 534 00:18:17,125 --> 00:18:21,042 - [laughs] So uncomfortable. 535 00:18:21,167 --> 00:18:23,625 - You don't think I have swag? 536 00:18:23,708 --> 00:18:25,500 My dress style is not swag? 537 00:18:25,625 --> 00:18:27,083 - I don't know that it screams swag. 538 00:18:27,208 --> 00:18:28,083 - Yeah, but I-- 539 00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:29,375 I can dial it up. 540 00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:31,167 Like, you've seen me dial it up. 541 00:18:31,333 --> 00:18:33,333 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, you wore a nice suit on your-- 542 00:18:33,458 --> 00:18:35,000 - Yeah, and the couples thing. 543 00:18:35,167 --> 00:18:36,625 I had my French cuffs and my blazer. 544 00:18:36,750 --> 00:18:38,042 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 545 00:18:38,208 --> 00:18:39,333 - You don't think that was swagged up? 546 00:18:39,458 --> 00:18:41,292 You thought that was terrible? 547 00:18:41,375 --> 00:18:42,875 She's like, it was absolutely the worst. 548 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,667 - I don't want to make you feel bad. 549 00:18:44,792 --> 00:18:47,167 - You're like-- immediately, you're like-- 550 00:18:47,292 --> 00:18:49,042 do you think Clint has swag? No. 551 00:18:49,208 --> 00:18:50,708 She didn't even finish the question. 552 00:18:50,833 --> 00:18:55,083 - [laughs] Was that as offensive as the honeymoon 553 00:18:55,208 --> 00:18:56,083 comment you made? 554 00:18:56,208 --> 00:18:57,167 - Probably worse. 555 00:18:57,333 --> 00:18:59,542 I can't get over it now. 556 00:18:59,667 --> 00:19:00,958 - I'm sorry. 557 00:19:01,042 --> 00:19:03,458 - Can you believe that-- 558 00:19:03,583 --> 00:19:05,333 - Listen, we're gonna have to get you just, 559 00:19:05,417 --> 00:19:06,375 like, a swagged-out haircut. 560 00:19:06,542 --> 00:19:07,833 I think that's the first step. 561 00:19:07,917 --> 00:19:09,458 We can't do it yet. 562 00:19:09,583 --> 00:19:11,167 - Oh, now my hair isn't swag enough for you? 563 00:19:11,292 --> 00:19:12,667 - No, you definitely don't have a swag haircut. 564 00:19:12,792 --> 00:19:13,875 We can work on it. 565 00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:15,500 - [bleep]. 566 00:19:15,583 --> 00:19:16,875 - You can't expect to have a swag haircut 567 00:19:17,042 --> 00:19:18,500 if you cut it by yourself. 568 00:19:18,667 --> 00:19:20,208 - True. 569 00:19:20,333 --> 00:19:21,292 - You've just been trimming it for eight years. 570 00:19:21,375 --> 00:19:23,500 You need, like, a good haircut. 571 00:19:23,583 --> 00:19:29,042 Whether or not we stay married, you'll thank me for that. 572 00:19:29,208 --> 00:19:32,083 So what are you thinking about this exercise? 573 00:19:32,208 --> 00:19:33,500 - Who the hell knows? 574 00:19:33,583 --> 00:19:35,458 You know, I don't like to ever say, 575 00:19:35,583 --> 00:19:37,667 like, I've got all the answers, and they're 576 00:19:37,833 --> 00:19:39,417 obviously professionals. 577 00:19:39,542 --> 00:19:40,708 - Mm-hmm. 578 00:19:40,833 --> 00:19:43,833 I don't know that curating our R&B playlist 579 00:19:43,917 --> 00:19:46,000 and lighting a candle is gonna make us want to bang 580 00:19:46,167 --> 00:19:47,292 in the next three weeks, but we'll 581 00:19:47,375 --> 00:19:49,417 definitely go for it. 582 00:19:49,542 --> 00:19:50,750 - But she also said, like, don't 583 00:19:50,875 --> 00:19:53,125 have a preconceived outcome. 584 00:19:53,208 --> 00:19:54,417 - Gitchy, gitchy, gitchy. 585 00:19:54,542 --> 00:19:56,000 Get him. 586 00:19:56,083 --> 00:19:57,083 So you think this is actually gonna work? 587 00:19:57,208 --> 00:19:58,333 - I know-- I don't know. 588 00:19:58,417 --> 00:19:59,833 I'm not one to say yes or no. 589 00:19:59,958 --> 00:20:01,667 Just I'm trying to be like, nope, 590 00:20:01,833 --> 00:20:04,792 I don't have my expectation of saying that's not gonna work. 591 00:20:04,875 --> 00:20:06,042 It might. 592 00:20:06,167 --> 00:20:07,917 I don't-- I don't know. - OK. 593 00:20:08,042 --> 00:20:12,917 - I'm not a sex counselor or doctor. 594 00:20:13,042 --> 00:20:14,500 So who knows? 595 00:20:14,625 --> 00:20:17,083 We might Amazon a damn sex chair after all this. 596 00:20:17,208 --> 00:20:18,500 - [laughs] 597 00:20:18,583 --> 00:20:19,583 - Like, a swing. 598 00:20:19,708 --> 00:20:20,625 - I might have one. 599 00:20:20,750 --> 00:20:21,583 You don't know. 600 00:20:21,708 --> 00:20:22,583 - Hot damn. 601 00:20:22,708 --> 00:20:23,708 - [laughs] 602 00:20:23,833 --> 00:20:26,333 - Damn, Gina. 603 00:20:26,500 --> 00:20:29,333 Got that "buy one, get one" swing. 604 00:20:29,417 --> 00:20:31,542 - At least you make me laugh, you know? 605 00:20:31,667 --> 00:20:33,458 - Hey, at least you laugh at me. 606 00:20:37,208 --> 00:20:40,000 [gentle music] 607 00:20:40,125 --> 00:20:44,958 ♪ ♪ 608 00:20:48,042 --> 00:20:49,042 - Hello, honey. 609 00:20:49,167 --> 00:20:50,250 How are you? 610 00:20:50,375 --> 00:20:53,167 - I'm good, well-rested. 611 00:20:53,250 --> 00:20:55,542 - Oh, why are you so well-rested? 612 00:20:55,667 --> 00:20:56,792 - Because I didn't have to wake up early 613 00:20:56,875 --> 00:20:59,333 for once in my life. 614 00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:01,125 - How's everything going? 615 00:21:01,208 --> 00:21:04,000 How is the recruiting and everything going? 616 00:21:04,125 --> 00:21:05,917 - It's been good. 617 00:21:06,042 --> 00:21:09,125 The president, she was really happy with the setup. 618 00:21:09,208 --> 00:21:13,333 So this was really a productive trip. 619 00:21:13,458 --> 00:21:16,333 - I just wish that I could be there and support him 620 00:21:16,417 --> 00:21:18,833 in these moments, and I wish that we 621 00:21:18,958 --> 00:21:20,792 were together right now. 622 00:21:20,875 --> 00:21:23,208 It's so important for me to be there for Shaquille. 623 00:21:23,333 --> 00:21:25,417 So I can't wait to his next event. 624 00:21:25,542 --> 00:21:27,250 I do look forward to attending that. 625 00:21:27,375 --> 00:21:29,333 And I really hope that that makes him happy. 626 00:21:29,458 --> 00:21:32,000 And I hope that I get to see him in his element. 627 00:21:32,125 --> 00:21:34,583 I was a little sad when I went to bed the other night 628 00:21:34,708 --> 00:21:39,042 and you wasn't here, but you'll be back tomorrow. 629 00:21:39,167 --> 00:21:40,292 So I can't wait. 630 00:21:40,375 --> 00:21:41,875 - I'll be back. 631 00:21:42,042 --> 00:21:43,333 - Well, what time are you leaving in the morning 632 00:21:43,417 --> 00:21:46,042 to come back to Nashville? 633 00:21:46,208 --> 00:21:47,417 - I haven't decided on the time, 634 00:21:47,542 --> 00:21:49,125 but I know I got to wake up early. 635 00:21:49,208 --> 00:21:51,000 - Yeah, you do. 636 00:21:51,083 --> 00:21:55,542 You need to set your alarm now, probably for about 5:00. 637 00:21:55,667 --> 00:21:57,500 - 4:00, 5:00, one of them. 638 00:21:57,625 --> 00:21:59,500 I haven't decided what time I want to wake up yet. 639 00:21:59,583 --> 00:22:00,708 - OK. 640 00:22:00,833 --> 00:22:03,792 Well, all right, honey, call me later. 641 00:22:03,917 --> 00:22:05,708 Bye. 642 00:22:05,833 --> 00:22:08,542 - Bye. 643 00:22:08,667 --> 00:22:10,333 ♪ ♪ 644 00:22:10,458 --> 00:22:13,292 [computer trilling] 645 00:22:13,375 --> 00:22:15,000 ♪ ♪ 646 00:22:15,125 --> 00:22:16,500 - Shaquille? 647 00:22:16,583 --> 00:22:18,167 I was just trying to blow you a kiss, 648 00:22:18,292 --> 00:22:21,417 and you didn't blow me a kiss back, that's all. 649 00:22:21,542 --> 00:22:23,042 - I didn't know you was trying to blow me a kiss-- 650 00:22:23,167 --> 00:22:24,167 - Because you hung up on me. - --to blow you one back. 651 00:22:24,250 --> 00:22:25,792 - Yeah, I know. 652 00:22:25,875 --> 00:22:28,000 That's why I called you back, but I have to go. 653 00:22:28,167 --> 00:22:29,167 Talk to you later. 654 00:22:29,292 --> 00:22:30,792 Call me later, OK? 655 00:22:30,875 --> 00:22:31,708 - All right, will do. 656 00:22:31,875 --> 00:22:34,083 - OK, have a good day. 657 00:22:34,208 --> 00:22:35,167 Bye. 658 00:22:35,250 --> 00:22:38,833 ♪ ♪ 659 00:22:38,917 --> 00:22:41,250 - ♪ I love the taste of your kiss ♪ 660 00:22:41,375 --> 00:22:44,917 ♪ I love the feel of your lips ♪ 661 00:22:45,042 --> 00:22:46,208 - Hello, welcome. 662 00:22:46,333 --> 00:22:47,500 - Hi, nice to meet you. 663 00:22:47,625 --> 00:22:49,167 - Hi, I'm Nicole. - Dr. Pia. 664 00:22:49,292 --> 00:22:50,750 Nice to meet you. - Welcome. 665 00:22:50,875 --> 00:22:52,167 - How are you? - This is my husband, Chris. 666 00:22:52,292 --> 00:22:53,583 - Chris. - Hi, Chris, nice to meet you. 667 00:22:53,708 --> 00:22:55,167 - Nice to meet you. - Firm handshake. 668 00:22:55,292 --> 00:22:56,500 - Oh, thank you. - Welcome to our home. 669 00:22:56,583 --> 00:22:57,333 - Thank you. - Shall we go sit down? 670 00:22:57,417 --> 00:22:58,500 - Sure. 671 00:22:58,625 --> 00:22:59,917 - Do you want anything to drink? 672 00:23:00,042 --> 00:23:01,167 Can I get you anything? - I think I'm OK. 673 00:23:01,250 --> 00:23:02,667 Thank you. - OK, great. 674 00:23:02,792 --> 00:23:03,708 You know what? I'm just gonna put that here. 675 00:23:03,833 --> 00:23:05,542 Welcome. - I like the dinosaurs here. 676 00:23:05,667 --> 00:23:07,625 What's the story behind that? 677 00:23:07,750 --> 00:23:10,458 - Just into dinosaurs, and Chris 678 00:23:10,583 --> 00:23:11,542 doesn't think it's weird. 679 00:23:11,667 --> 00:23:13,708 So now they grace our home. 680 00:23:13,833 --> 00:23:16,000 - OK, and I understand that you all 681 00:23:16,125 --> 00:23:19,250 have a really good connection, a lot of great chemistry. 682 00:23:19,375 --> 00:23:20,542 Things have been going swimmingly 683 00:23:20,667 --> 00:23:22,000 in the relationship. 684 00:23:22,125 --> 00:23:23,292 Sounds like trust feels strong. 685 00:23:23,375 --> 00:23:25,000 - Mm-hmm. - Is that right? 686 00:23:25,125 --> 00:23:26,875 - Yes. - Yeah, very strong. 687 00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:28,417 - Yeah, well, I'm glad that you feel so comfortable with one 688 00:23:28,542 --> 00:23:30,167 another and that's created the groundwork 689 00:23:30,250 --> 00:23:31,667 for some really good trust, which is 690 00:23:31,750 --> 00:23:34,125 a great foundation and a necessary foundation 691 00:23:34,208 --> 00:23:35,667 for a marriage. 692 00:23:35,750 --> 00:23:38,083 And so I understand that you all have been 693 00:23:38,208 --> 00:23:39,250 intimate with one another. - Yes. 694 00:23:39,375 --> 00:23:40,250 - You all have had sex. 695 00:23:40,375 --> 00:23:41,750 - Yep. 696 00:23:41,875 --> 00:23:43,250 - We did not have sex on our honeymoon, 697 00:23:43,375 --> 00:23:45,375 because we felt like we had such 698 00:23:45,500 --> 00:23:47,000 a strong emotional connection, and we 699 00:23:47,167 --> 00:23:48,333 didn't want sex to cloud that. 700 00:23:48,458 --> 00:23:50,000 - Mm-hmm. 701 00:23:50,125 --> 00:23:51,625 - So we were waiting until we both felt ready. 702 00:23:51,750 --> 00:23:54,458 - Has sex negatively impacted emotions 703 00:23:54,542 --> 00:23:56,500 in previous relationships? 704 00:23:56,625 --> 00:23:58,500 - Like, I've had relationships where, like, that's all, 705 00:23:58,625 --> 00:24:00,333 like, they wanted. 706 00:24:00,500 --> 00:24:01,833 Like, it was just all about that, didn't really 707 00:24:01,958 --> 00:24:03,042 care about what you had to say, didn't really 708 00:24:03,167 --> 00:24:04,750 care about who you were. 709 00:24:04,875 --> 00:24:06,417 It was just like that's what the relationship was 710 00:24:06,542 --> 00:24:08,167 all about, and that's what we didn't want. 711 00:24:08,292 --> 00:24:10,583 So like, we wanted to make sure that we kind of built 712 00:24:10,708 --> 00:24:12,583 that emotional connection first and then-- 713 00:24:12,708 --> 00:24:14,458 because we knew the physical aspect was already there. 714 00:24:14,583 --> 00:24:15,833 We just, you know, chose to wait. 715 00:24:15,958 --> 00:24:17,333 - OK. 716 00:24:17,417 --> 00:24:19,083 - And I have a similar dating history 717 00:24:19,208 --> 00:24:22,750 where I've had relationships that were clouded by sex, 718 00:24:22,875 --> 00:24:24,667 but in a little bit of a different way. 719 00:24:24,833 --> 00:24:26,667 I would call it hate sex, honestly, for lack of a better 720 00:24:26,750 --> 00:24:29,333 term, where I didn't even really like the guy, 721 00:24:29,458 --> 00:24:31,333 but I was like, I want to feel wanted. 722 00:24:31,417 --> 00:24:32,458 - Yeah. 723 00:24:32,583 --> 00:24:34,208 - So I'm just gonna do this. 724 00:24:34,375 --> 00:24:36,375 And even though the sex is good, 725 00:24:36,500 --> 00:24:37,875 like, I don't feel good about it after, 726 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:40,792 because this person isn't that important to me. 727 00:24:40,875 --> 00:24:44,375 But after every time with us, I feel really good about myself 728 00:24:44,542 --> 00:24:47,167 and about what we've just done, and there's no shame attached. 729 00:24:47,292 --> 00:24:48,833 There's no regret attached. 730 00:24:48,917 --> 00:24:49,792 - Good. 731 00:24:49,875 --> 00:24:53,625 Mm-hmm, OK, how's the foreplay? 732 00:24:53,708 --> 00:24:57,792 - Not as much as I personally would like, 733 00:24:57,917 --> 00:25:00,625 but it's like we do enough foreplay to get excited 734 00:25:00,708 --> 00:25:03,792 and then the final act. 735 00:25:03,917 --> 00:25:05,375 There could be more foreplay. 736 00:25:05,542 --> 00:25:06,333 I don't know why I'm stretching this out. 737 00:25:06,500 --> 00:25:07,958 - Yeah, there could be. 738 00:25:08,083 --> 00:25:09,458 - Would you call yourself, like, a people pleaser? 739 00:25:09,542 --> 00:25:10,792 - Usually, yes. 740 00:25:10,875 --> 00:25:12,208 - Yeah. 741 00:25:12,333 --> 00:25:13,875 - But in this relationship not really. 742 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,208 - Well, the reason I'm asking that is because I 743 00:25:16,375 --> 00:25:18,000 know that this is not-- 744 00:25:18,167 --> 00:25:19,833 I'm not suggesting this is similar to past relationships. 745 00:25:19,958 --> 00:25:21,708 But when you said you were having sex 746 00:25:21,833 --> 00:25:23,583 even when you didn't want to in past relationships, 747 00:25:23,708 --> 00:25:25,958 I'm wondering, are you depriving yourself of foreplay 748 00:25:26,042 --> 00:25:28,667 and saying that it's OK just because it's not happening 749 00:25:28,833 --> 00:25:30,833 and not wanting to, like, rock the boat? 750 00:25:30,958 --> 00:25:32,833 Like, you've got this healthy relationship 751 00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:34,708 with this man who cares a great deal about you 752 00:25:34,833 --> 00:25:36,583 and is very respectful of you. 753 00:25:36,708 --> 00:25:40,417 And we can use this as, like, a safe place, 754 00:25:40,542 --> 00:25:42,000 that you are safe with him and it 755 00:25:42,125 --> 00:25:43,833 is OK to explore with him because he's 756 00:25:43,958 --> 00:25:45,375 not gonna use it against you. 757 00:25:45,500 --> 00:25:47,542 He's not trying to harm you. 758 00:25:47,667 --> 00:25:51,667 What's it like knowing that he's a safe space? 759 00:25:51,750 --> 00:25:54,000 - It's amazing. 760 00:25:54,125 --> 00:25:56,667 I mean, there's-- there's no other word to describe it, 761 00:25:56,792 --> 00:25:58,500 but-- 762 00:25:58,583 --> 00:25:59,833 - Mm-hmm. 763 00:25:59,958 --> 00:26:02,667 Is there sadness coming up? 764 00:26:02,792 --> 00:26:09,000 - It-- it's more of I didn't realize I had so many issues 765 00:26:09,167 --> 00:26:11,208 until we talk about all of these things 766 00:26:11,375 --> 00:26:13,500 and I say them out loud. 767 00:26:13,583 --> 00:26:16,000 I'm like, wow, you are really [bleep] up, so-- 768 00:26:16,125 --> 00:26:17,500 - No. - Stop that. 769 00:26:17,667 --> 00:26:18,667 - It's just-- 770 00:26:18,750 --> 00:26:19,583 - No, no, we're gonna pause. 771 00:26:19,708 --> 00:26:21,333 You are not [bleep] up. 772 00:26:21,500 --> 00:26:24,792 Let's not talk about you in that way, OK? 773 00:26:24,875 --> 00:26:26,833 It's not that you have all these issues. 774 00:26:26,958 --> 00:26:30,167 Things have happened to you. 775 00:26:30,333 --> 00:26:31,708 - Things that I have let happen. 776 00:26:31,833 --> 00:26:34,167 I have to take responsibility for a lot of my actions 777 00:26:34,292 --> 00:26:39,167 and recognize that people didn't treat me any way 778 00:26:39,292 --> 00:26:41,000 that I didn't allow them to. 779 00:26:41,167 --> 00:26:43,792 And now I'm a very strong, confident woman. 780 00:26:43,917 --> 00:26:48,000 And thankfully, I have the world's nicest man 781 00:26:48,167 --> 00:26:51,500 to be married to, but there's so many 782 00:26:51,625 --> 00:26:55,083 things that I need to work on. 783 00:26:55,208 --> 00:27:00,000 And I just-- I'm realizing them as they're coming up. 784 00:27:00,083 --> 00:27:03,042 - He's willing to have these conversations with you. 785 00:27:03,208 --> 00:27:04,333 He's not your past. 786 00:27:04,417 --> 00:27:06,167 - I know that. - And so the more that you can lean 787 00:27:06,292 --> 00:27:09,083 into being vulnerable with him, that's where the passion 788 00:27:09,208 --> 00:27:10,750 is gonna come from. 789 00:27:10,875 --> 00:27:13,500 Because now you're opening yourself up in a way 790 00:27:13,625 --> 00:27:15,250 that you weren't before. 791 00:27:15,375 --> 00:27:17,500 And you're gonna be able to experience things that you 792 00:27:17,583 --> 00:27:21,250 weren't experiencing before. 793 00:27:21,375 --> 00:27:24,125 - This is a feeling that I'm not used to. 794 00:27:24,208 --> 00:27:26,375 I thought we were gonna meet with Dr. Pia 795 00:27:26,500 --> 00:27:28,917 and she was gonna come spew some, like, 796 00:27:29,042 --> 00:27:30,750 here's how to make your sex life better. 797 00:27:30,875 --> 00:27:33,167 Like, OK, great, thank you, I know what I'm doing. 798 00:27:33,292 --> 00:27:34,583 I have a very happy husband. 799 00:27:34,708 --> 00:27:39,125 But she really more so got to the root 800 00:27:39,250 --> 00:27:43,292 of why I feel the way I do about sex in general 801 00:27:43,375 --> 00:27:47,125 and what's kind of blocking me from feeling better. 802 00:27:47,250 --> 00:27:51,417 - My hope for you is that you're able to reduce 803 00:27:51,542 --> 00:27:54,667 the self-deprecating talk about yourself, 804 00:27:54,792 --> 00:27:56,500 because what you're describing is 805 00:27:56,667 --> 00:27:58,375 not who I see in front of me. 806 00:27:58,500 --> 00:27:59,792 And it certainly doesn't seem like this 807 00:27:59,875 --> 00:28:01,167 is who he sees, either. 808 00:28:01,292 --> 00:28:02,250 You're not a burden. 809 00:28:02,375 --> 00:28:03,292 You're not a problem. 810 00:28:03,417 --> 00:28:04,667 You're not a ball of issues. 811 00:28:04,792 --> 00:28:06,500 You're the woman that he is so happy 812 00:28:06,667 --> 00:28:08,167 that he was matched with. 813 00:28:08,333 --> 00:28:13,292 ♪ ♪ 814 00:28:17,167 --> 00:28:18,667 - ♪ Dream on ♪ 815 00:28:18,792 --> 00:28:22,208 ♪ In the dark, the sun is rising on and on 816 00:28:22,333 --> 00:28:23,500 ♪ ♪ 817 00:28:23,625 --> 00:28:24,958 - Dang. 818 00:28:25,042 --> 00:28:26,625 - What? 819 00:28:26,750 --> 00:28:30,333 - They done turned cutting peppers in the beef. 820 00:28:30,500 --> 00:28:34,333 - [laughs] 821 00:28:34,458 --> 00:28:38,042 - Now that, like, I have a new definition of intimacy, 822 00:28:38,167 --> 00:28:40,625 you know, thanks to Dr. Pia, you know, 823 00:28:40,708 --> 00:28:42,167 I can see where she's coming from. 824 00:28:42,333 --> 00:28:44,333 You know, she's not asking for anything crazy, 825 00:28:44,458 --> 00:28:47,667 but there's still some areas where I can improve. 826 00:28:47,750 --> 00:28:50,333 You know, hopefully, that spark can, you know, 827 00:28:50,417 --> 00:28:52,792 come with the little bit of time we have left. 828 00:28:52,917 --> 00:28:54,292 Oh, yeah, so I talked to your sister-- 829 00:28:54,375 --> 00:28:55,667 - Mm-hmm. 830 00:28:55,750 --> 00:28:56,667 - --Emi. 831 00:28:56,792 --> 00:28:57,875 - You did? 832 00:28:58,000 --> 00:28:59,458 - Straight out of M town. 833 00:28:59,583 --> 00:29:02,125 - [laughs] - The world-renowned. 834 00:29:02,208 --> 00:29:04,333 - No one wants to feel like they have to woo you for you 835 00:29:04,417 --> 00:29:06,125 to love them. 836 00:29:06,250 --> 00:29:07,792 She shouldn't have to do nothing for you to love her, 837 00:29:07,875 --> 00:29:11,125 because you signed up to be married and do that. 838 00:29:11,208 --> 00:29:13,833 So it's like, in your brain, I want to challenge you, 839 00:29:13,958 --> 00:29:16,333 like, how can I make this girl comfortable 840 00:29:16,458 --> 00:29:18,833 even though I'm uncomfortable at the same time? 841 00:29:18,958 --> 00:29:22,125 - But one thing I learned, she was telling me-- 842 00:29:22,208 --> 00:29:24,667 I guess, like, she was like, I need to give you some 843 00:29:24,792 --> 00:29:26,667 of the things that maybe, like, you guys didn't see 844 00:29:26,792 --> 00:29:28,000 in your parents growing up. 845 00:29:28,125 --> 00:29:30,333 - My dad's very nonchalant. 846 00:29:30,500 --> 00:29:32,208 Like, I mean, we've had private conversations. 847 00:29:32,333 --> 00:29:35,833 Like, my dad never was like, I love you, 848 00:29:35,958 --> 00:29:38,583 but I never questioned if my dad loved me, 849 00:29:38,708 --> 00:29:40,875 because they showed the love. 850 00:29:41,042 --> 00:29:43,292 That's why I'm not really big on words. 851 00:29:43,375 --> 00:29:44,333 I'm really big on actions. 852 00:29:44,417 --> 00:29:46,167 - Mm-hmm. 853 00:29:46,292 --> 00:29:48,500 - Well, she had told me she asked you about wedding day, 854 00:29:48,625 --> 00:29:51,208 and you told her you only clapped 855 00:29:51,333 --> 00:29:54,125 for me on wedding day because Pastor Cal told you to. 856 00:29:54,250 --> 00:29:57,042 - When I met with Pastor Cal, he was like, you know, what-- 857 00:29:57,167 --> 00:29:59,000 what if-- what if your wife asked for, like, 858 00:29:59,125 --> 00:30:00,500 somebody tall and she don't-- you know, 859 00:30:00,667 --> 00:30:01,958 she's not attracted to you? 860 00:30:02,042 --> 00:30:03,667 He's like, no matter what, make her 861 00:30:03,750 --> 00:30:05,667 feel, like, safe and confident in that moment. 862 00:30:05,792 --> 00:30:08,000 He was like, even if you're not there-- 863 00:30:08,125 --> 00:30:10,625 he was like, he's like, trust me, it's gonna, like, 864 00:30:10,750 --> 00:30:12,583 save you in the long run. 865 00:30:12,708 --> 00:30:15,833 I was like, let me be a husband and calm 866 00:30:15,958 --> 00:30:18,167 my wife down in this moment. 867 00:30:18,250 --> 00:30:22,167 - So let me calm my wife down and lie to her? 868 00:30:22,292 --> 00:30:24,792 - I mean, you started breathing and you didn't faint. 869 00:30:24,875 --> 00:30:26,250 That would have been embarrassing if you-- 870 00:30:26,375 --> 00:30:29,208 - So it was calm my wife down and lie to her? 871 00:30:29,333 --> 00:30:31,042 - I mean, what was I supposed to do? 872 00:30:31,167 --> 00:30:34,000 - I feel like, to me, my husband 873 00:30:34,125 --> 00:30:35,542 should be smitten by me. 874 00:30:35,667 --> 00:30:37,667 He should want to be around me. 875 00:30:37,833 --> 00:30:39,000 He should want to talk to me. 876 00:30:39,083 --> 00:30:40,625 He should want to check in on me. 877 00:30:40,708 --> 00:30:41,583 He should want to hold my hand. 878 00:30:41,708 --> 00:30:43,083 He should want to hug me. 879 00:30:43,208 --> 00:30:45,000 He shouldn't want to do those things 880 00:30:45,083 --> 00:30:46,000 because they told him those are the things 881 00:30:46,125 --> 00:30:47,958 he should be doing. 882 00:30:48,042 --> 00:30:49,917 I feel like all those things should come natural. 883 00:30:50,042 --> 00:30:53,708 So I don't feel like Airris is all in. 884 00:30:53,875 --> 00:30:55,500 I feel like he might be one big toe in, 885 00:30:55,625 --> 00:30:57,667 and the rest of his body is, like, out the door. 886 00:30:57,750 --> 00:31:00,792 So that doesn't put me in a good space. 887 00:31:00,917 --> 00:31:04,083 ♪ ♪ 888 00:31:04,208 --> 00:31:06,917 - ♪ I feel the heat as you lay by my side ♪ 889 00:31:07,042 --> 00:31:09,667 ♪ The planet is guiding me home ♪ 890 00:31:09,750 --> 00:31:14,042 ♪ ♪ 891 00:31:14,208 --> 00:31:16,708 - ♪ Up in the morning, grinding ♪ 892 00:31:16,833 --> 00:31:18,625 ♪ Ain't no time for sleeping ♪ 893 00:31:18,708 --> 00:31:21,583 [knock at door] 894 00:31:21,708 --> 00:31:22,833 - Hello. - Hey, hey, how are you? 895 00:31:22,958 --> 00:31:24,667 - Hi. Dr. Pia. 896 00:31:24,792 --> 00:31:26,292 Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. 897 00:31:26,417 --> 00:31:27,833 Shaquille. 898 00:31:27,958 --> 00:31:28,958 I'm happy to be home, happy to be on my sofa, 899 00:31:29,042 --> 00:31:30,875 happy to see my wife. 900 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,042 And I think what the future holds for Kirsten and I 901 00:31:33,167 --> 00:31:35,667 as we get closer to Decision Day is making sure that we 902 00:31:35,750 --> 00:31:42,000 both feel appreciated and wanted and needed to continue 903 00:31:42,167 --> 00:31:44,500 this marriage and just my biggest 904 00:31:44,625 --> 00:31:46,000 supporter along this journey. 905 00:31:46,125 --> 00:31:48,833 - Well, how have things been going? 906 00:31:48,917 --> 00:31:50,667 - You know, things have been going great. 907 00:31:50,750 --> 00:31:53,125 - What's been making it go great? 908 00:31:53,208 --> 00:31:56,958 - I would say the quality time, for sure. 909 00:31:57,083 --> 00:31:58,500 Like, that's definitely, you know, 910 00:31:58,667 --> 00:32:01,583 what I needed from him is that quality time for us 911 00:32:01,708 --> 00:32:03,208 to continue to build our marriage 912 00:32:03,333 --> 00:32:05,917 and to get to know each other on different levels. 913 00:32:06,042 --> 00:32:09,375 So for me, I feel like everything is going well. 914 00:32:09,542 --> 00:32:11,500 - Do you agree, Shaquille, with her assessment 915 00:32:11,625 --> 00:32:13,708 that things are going great? 916 00:32:13,833 --> 00:32:16,625 - I would definitely say it's been rocky. 917 00:32:16,708 --> 00:32:18,000 - That's, like, polar opposites. 918 00:32:18,167 --> 00:32:19,333 - Well, I'm saying-- 919 00:32:19,500 --> 00:32:20,667 I'm saying-- - We've had our days. 920 00:32:20,792 --> 00:32:22,125 - --yeah, we've had our days. 921 00:32:22,208 --> 00:32:24,833 It's been more good days than bad. 922 00:32:24,958 --> 00:32:26,667 But all it is, is, for me, it's really 923 00:32:26,792 --> 00:32:27,833 learning about each other. 924 00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:29,875 Like, I didn't know her. 925 00:32:30,042 --> 00:32:31,667 She didn't know me. 926 00:32:31,792 --> 00:32:33,542 You know, I got a-- you know, she got her real estate 927 00:32:33,667 --> 00:32:34,583 business going on. 928 00:32:34,708 --> 00:32:36,167 I got school and work. 929 00:32:36,292 --> 00:32:38,833 So honestly, with me, it's really on my end, 930 00:32:38,958 --> 00:32:41,542 really trying to find out how to balance it all. 931 00:32:41,667 --> 00:32:45,458 - It's hard, but I'm just used to always having control. 932 00:32:45,542 --> 00:32:49,500 And it's so hard for me to not always be in control. 933 00:32:49,625 --> 00:32:52,625 - So, you know, in a marriage, it's important to recognize, 934 00:32:52,708 --> 00:32:54,500 like, you can't just be in control, either one of 935 00:32:54,625 --> 00:32:56,000 you, right? 936 00:32:56,167 --> 00:32:57,375 Like, you both have to relinquish some control 937 00:32:57,500 --> 00:32:59,625 and accept each other's influence. 938 00:32:59,708 --> 00:33:03,833 Do you feel comfortable allowing your husband to take 939 00:33:03,958 --> 00:33:05,375 care of you or care for you? 940 00:33:05,542 --> 00:33:06,792 - I do. - Yeah. 941 00:33:06,875 --> 00:33:08,083 - I do feel comfortable. 942 00:33:08,208 --> 00:33:09,792 I'm feeling more comfortable day by day. 943 00:33:09,875 --> 00:33:11,042 - Mm-hmm. 944 00:33:11,167 --> 00:33:12,625 - It's just all so new for me. 945 00:33:12,708 --> 00:33:15,000 - Yeah, I mean, it does take time to build trust, 946 00:33:15,125 --> 00:33:17,875 and you are in a very unique situation 947 00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:20,250 where the relationship is accelerated. 948 00:33:20,375 --> 00:33:22,625 Have you all talked much about what 949 00:33:22,708 --> 00:33:26,667 attracts you to one another? 950 00:33:26,792 --> 00:33:31,500 - No, but I find him attractive when he's, like-- 951 00:33:31,625 --> 00:33:34,333 for example, when we had to get our clothes and move, 952 00:33:34,458 --> 00:33:37,917 like, him moving boxes, that was attractive, 953 00:33:38,042 --> 00:33:40,625 the smallest things. 954 00:33:40,708 --> 00:33:43,000 - What was it about the act of moving boxes 955 00:33:43,125 --> 00:33:44,625 that you found attractive? 956 00:33:44,708 --> 00:33:46,875 - Like, he's using his muscles, making sure, 957 00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:51,167 you know, all of my things and his things are taken care of. 958 00:33:51,333 --> 00:33:53,500 Like, it was just him being masculine. 959 00:33:53,667 --> 00:33:54,792 - Masculine. 960 00:33:54,917 --> 00:33:56,750 How do you define masculinity? 961 00:33:56,875 --> 00:33:58,667 - Honestly, just getting the job done. 962 00:33:58,750 --> 00:34:01,667 Like, just making for sure he's taking care of business. 963 00:34:01,792 --> 00:34:03,625 - Do you think he's masculine? 964 00:34:03,708 --> 00:34:05,667 - Um. 965 00:34:08,417 --> 00:34:11,792 ♪ ♪ 966 00:34:11,917 --> 00:34:13,458 He is. 967 00:34:13,542 --> 00:34:15,125 He is. 968 00:34:15,250 --> 00:34:17,833 - There was a long pause. 969 00:34:17,958 --> 00:34:21,500 ♪ ♪ 970 00:34:25,292 --> 00:34:28,500 - I guess because I don't know. 971 00:34:28,625 --> 00:34:30,542 Like, my dad, he's very masculine. 972 00:34:30,708 --> 00:34:37,167 Like, he's very hands on, tough man, provider, business owner. 973 00:34:37,250 --> 00:34:39,083 - You mentioned-- 974 00:34:39,208 --> 00:34:40,333 I feel like you accentuated the word "tough" when 975 00:34:40,458 --> 00:34:41,500 you were describing your dad. 976 00:34:41,583 --> 00:34:42,917 - Mm-hmm. 977 00:34:43,042 --> 00:34:44,750 - Do you feel like Shaquille is tough? 978 00:34:44,875 --> 00:34:46,542 - I feel like he can be. 979 00:34:46,708 --> 00:34:48,875 I haven't really gotten to see that tough side of him 980 00:34:49,042 --> 00:34:50,417 just yet, so-- 981 00:34:50,542 --> 00:34:53,250 - What side do you feel like you have seen? 982 00:34:53,375 --> 00:34:59,000 - The kind, genuine, pleasing side of him. 983 00:34:59,167 --> 00:35:01,000 - Can that be masculine? 984 00:35:01,167 --> 00:35:03,250 - Um... 985 00:35:03,375 --> 00:35:06,333 I think that definitely helps me feel more 986 00:35:06,417 --> 00:35:09,500 secure and comfortable in the relationship 987 00:35:09,625 --> 00:35:14,333 versus, like, safe and protected. 988 00:35:14,458 --> 00:35:18,375 - So are you saying that you don't quite feel safe 989 00:35:18,542 --> 00:35:19,750 and protected? 990 00:35:19,875 --> 00:35:23,333 - That's a tough question. 991 00:35:23,417 --> 00:35:25,167 I feel like Shaquille would definitely, like, protect me 992 00:35:25,292 --> 00:35:26,833 if something was to happen. 993 00:35:26,958 --> 00:35:28,542 - So what made it a tough question? 994 00:35:28,708 --> 00:35:32,125 - Just because I haven't seen him in that-- 995 00:35:32,208 --> 00:35:36,458 in that form before, and I don't fully, you know, 996 00:35:36,542 --> 00:35:38,208 feel it just yet. 997 00:35:38,333 --> 00:35:40,000 - So, Shaquille, I appreciate you, 998 00:35:40,125 --> 00:35:42,625 like, being quiet and listening to her, 999 00:35:42,708 --> 00:35:44,917 but I also want to know, what's your reaction 1000 00:35:45,042 --> 00:35:45,833 to hearing all of this? 1001 00:35:45,917 --> 00:35:47,250 - Oh god. 1002 00:35:47,375 --> 00:35:50,458 - Um, do you not think I'm tough? 1003 00:35:50,542 --> 00:35:53,375 Do you not think I'm, like, this person, you know? 1004 00:35:53,500 --> 00:35:54,958 - Mm-hmm. 1005 00:35:55,042 --> 00:35:57,542 - Does something have to happen for you to even feel that? 1006 00:35:57,667 --> 00:35:59,458 - Mm-hmm. 1007 00:35:59,542 --> 00:36:00,667 - Like, do somebody to have to rob us at a gas station or-- 1008 00:36:00,833 --> 00:36:02,333 - God forbid. 1009 00:36:02,500 --> 00:36:04,292 - --try to jack your car or something for me to have 1010 00:36:04,375 --> 00:36:07,292 to stand up, or your food not right at a restaurant for me 1011 00:36:07,417 --> 00:36:08,542 to, you know, just get mad? 1012 00:36:08,667 --> 00:36:10,500 - Mm-hmm. 1013 00:36:10,625 --> 00:36:12,333 - And I'm not the person to get, like, frustrated and mad, 1014 00:36:12,458 --> 00:36:16,667 but I think she wants to mimic her dad in the ways, 1015 00:36:16,750 --> 00:36:21,333 you know, of being, you know, masculine, and, you know, 1016 00:36:21,458 --> 00:36:25,667 dominant, you know, like, being a man. 1017 00:36:25,792 --> 00:36:28,625 - Did he get that right, that you're wanting your husband 1018 00:36:28,750 --> 00:36:30,167 to be like your dad? 1019 00:36:30,292 --> 00:36:32,625 - Not-- not necessarily like my dad, 1020 00:36:32,708 --> 00:36:35,500 but maybe have some of those same traits in common. 1021 00:36:35,625 --> 00:36:38,667 - For me, it's a thing like, do you not see me trying? 1022 00:36:38,792 --> 00:36:40,750 Like, do you not see me, like, putting forth 1023 00:36:40,875 --> 00:36:43,125 the effort to be this person? 1024 00:36:43,250 --> 00:36:45,375 ♪ ♪ 1025 00:36:45,500 --> 00:36:47,333 I've just been feeling like since day one 1026 00:36:47,458 --> 00:36:48,833 I've been just having to prove myself, 1027 00:36:48,958 --> 00:36:54,042 you know, as a husband, as a man, as her spouse. 1028 00:36:54,208 --> 00:36:56,500 Like, I just consistently feel like I've 1029 00:36:56,583 --> 00:36:58,167 been having to prove myself. 1030 00:36:58,333 --> 00:37:01,667 And it always is a lot. 1031 00:37:01,792 --> 00:37:03,625 And she always saying, like, I don't want to change you 1032 00:37:03,708 --> 00:37:06,458 or anything like that, but you still have these expectations 1033 00:37:06,583 --> 00:37:07,500 of me, you know? 1034 00:37:07,583 --> 00:37:08,667 And it's kind of like, damn. 1035 00:37:08,792 --> 00:37:11,500 Like, whew. 1036 00:37:11,667 --> 00:37:13,875 It just-- it takes a mental toll on you. 1037 00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:15,917 ♪ ♪ 1038 00:37:16,042 --> 00:37:20,125 - My only concern is you changing yourself to meet 1039 00:37:20,208 --> 00:37:23,083 her expectations, because over time, 1040 00:37:23,208 --> 00:37:24,500 that's gonna cause resentment, right, 1041 00:37:24,667 --> 00:37:27,625 because you're not being your true, authentic self. 1042 00:37:27,750 --> 00:37:32,500 And I'm curious, for you, if those things don't change, 1043 00:37:32,667 --> 00:37:34,292 if you don't see him becoming more 1044 00:37:34,375 --> 00:37:37,083 of your definition of masculine, 1045 00:37:37,208 --> 00:37:38,333 will the marriage succeed? 1046 00:37:38,458 --> 00:37:40,333 - Well, I don't-- 1047 00:37:40,458 --> 00:37:42,792 I don't want him to try to become something he's not, 1048 00:37:42,875 --> 00:37:45,667 you know, and I always tell him to be yourself. 1049 00:37:45,750 --> 00:37:48,167 Like, I do feel like if he's meeting 1050 00:37:48,333 --> 00:37:51,917 other needs and expectations of mine, like, 1051 00:37:52,042 --> 00:37:52,833 that matters a lot. 1052 00:37:52,958 --> 00:37:55,750 ♪ ♪ 1053 00:37:55,875 --> 00:37:58,500 - OK. 1054 00:37:58,583 --> 00:38:02,292 - ♪ I'm hoping this forever whoa-oh ♪ 1055 00:38:02,375 --> 00:38:06,667 ♪ This feels like, whoa-oh, love ♪ 1056 00:38:06,833 --> 00:38:07,917 - Hi, doggies. 1057 00:38:08,042 --> 00:38:09,667 - Hi, puppies. 1058 00:38:09,833 --> 00:38:11,167 Look at this. 1059 00:38:11,333 --> 00:38:12,208 - Guys, did you get us a magic chest? 1060 00:38:12,333 --> 00:38:13,750 - A treasure chest. 1061 00:38:13,875 --> 00:38:16,208 I bet you it's from one of the experts. 1062 00:38:16,375 --> 00:38:18,708 - Nicole and Chris already have a great foundation 1063 00:38:18,833 --> 00:38:21,167 for trust and intimacy in the short time 1064 00:38:21,292 --> 00:38:22,625 they've been together. 1065 00:38:22,708 --> 00:38:24,583 But in any marriage, you don't want 1066 00:38:24,708 --> 00:38:27,708 to wait till things get bland before you spice things up. 1067 00:38:27,875 --> 00:38:30,167 So we're encouraging them to explore 1068 00:38:30,292 --> 00:38:32,542 outside of their comfort zone 1069 00:38:32,667 --> 00:38:34,625 and have a little fun along the way. 1070 00:38:34,708 --> 00:38:36,667 - All right. 1071 00:38:36,792 --> 00:38:38,250 ♪ ♪ 1072 00:38:38,375 --> 00:38:40,167 - Let's see what's in this thing. 1073 00:38:40,250 --> 00:38:41,417 - It's a bidet. 1074 00:38:41,542 --> 00:38:42,417 No. 1075 00:38:42,542 --> 00:38:43,625 Oh. 1076 00:38:43,708 --> 00:38:46,333 - Let's see. 1077 00:38:46,417 --> 00:38:47,625 - Massage candle. 1078 00:38:47,750 --> 00:38:49,667 I feel like I like that in theory, 1079 00:38:49,792 --> 00:38:53,167 but what if we do it too soon and then we burn each other? 1080 00:38:53,292 --> 00:38:57,208 Pineapple-flavored massage oil. 1081 00:38:57,333 --> 00:38:58,750 We could get out of these so easily. 1082 00:38:58,875 --> 00:39:00,208 Ha, for chumps. 1083 00:39:00,333 --> 00:39:01,500 - Yeah, I don't know about handcuffs. 1084 00:39:01,625 --> 00:39:02,625 - Warming lubricant? 1085 00:39:02,750 --> 00:39:05,875 I feel like that is rash city. 1086 00:39:06,042 --> 00:39:08,083 Sex bondage, a whip. 1087 00:39:08,208 --> 00:39:09,000 I don't think so. 1088 00:39:09,125 --> 00:39:10,667 - No? 1089 00:39:10,750 --> 00:39:13,500 Leather. [laughs] 1090 00:39:13,667 --> 00:39:16,333 - Self-love is something I need to work on, 1091 00:39:16,417 --> 00:39:18,500 and I'm working on that 1092 00:39:18,583 --> 00:39:20,167 while also learning to love my husband, 1093 00:39:20,292 --> 00:39:21,583 while also learning to be married 1094 00:39:21,708 --> 00:39:23,292 and do all of these things. 1095 00:39:23,417 --> 00:39:25,958 So I feel like it'd be more beneficial for me 1096 00:39:26,083 --> 00:39:28,417 to work on those mental elements 1097 00:39:28,542 --> 00:39:31,375 and really be comfortable with who I am, 1098 00:39:31,542 --> 00:39:33,583 what I'm doing before I start jumping 1099 00:39:33,708 --> 00:39:36,458 in and enhancing something that's already good enough. 1100 00:39:38,042 --> 00:39:39,375 I do want to try things with you. 1101 00:39:39,500 --> 00:39:41,250 I do want to explore. 1102 00:39:41,375 --> 00:39:43,167 And even if we hate everything new we're trying, 1103 00:39:43,250 --> 00:39:44,000 I want to at least try it and see. 1104 00:39:44,167 --> 00:39:45,500 - Yeah. 1105 00:39:45,667 --> 00:39:47,167 - Maybe we'll find something we love. 1106 00:39:47,250 --> 00:39:49,208 - Yeah, I mean, I'm open to it, 1107 00:39:49,333 --> 00:39:50,833 but it's not one of those things like-- 1108 00:39:50,958 --> 00:39:52,417 I'm not-- I don't need it. 1109 00:39:52,542 --> 00:39:54,000 Yeah, I mean, obviously, I want to make sure 1110 00:39:54,083 --> 00:39:55,917 that you're always satisfied. I care more about-- 1111 00:39:56,042 --> 00:39:57,125 - I know you do. 1112 00:39:57,250 --> 00:39:58,417 - --you being pleased than me. 1113 00:39:58,542 --> 00:40:00,000 - And I-- it is one of the things 1114 00:40:00,125 --> 00:40:01,667 I appreciate most about you. 1115 00:40:01,792 --> 00:40:04,000 Maybe we will need to incorporate a little more 1116 00:40:04,167 --> 00:40:08,625 foreplay and maybe we get, you know, some sort of toy, 1117 00:40:08,708 --> 00:40:10,958 or lube, or I don't know what it's gonna be. 1118 00:40:11,042 --> 00:40:13,792 But I would feel comfortable if today was Decision Day saying 1119 00:40:13,875 --> 00:40:15,833 yes based on the sex life we already have, 1120 00:40:15,917 --> 00:40:17,917 even if that was it for the rest of our lives, 1121 00:40:18,042 --> 00:40:20,833 knowing it will get better and, you know, 1122 00:40:20,958 --> 00:40:23,125 we'll enhance it with things and whatever. 1123 00:40:23,250 --> 00:40:24,708 But-- - Yeah. 1124 00:40:24,833 --> 00:40:25,958 - --the way it is now, if that was it for life, 1125 00:40:26,083 --> 00:40:27,750 I'd be like, OK. 1126 00:40:27,875 --> 00:40:32,042 - My priority is more making sure that, you know, 1,000%, 1127 00:40:32,208 --> 00:40:35,000 we say yes on Decision Day, and that we're both on the same 1128 00:40:35,167 --> 00:40:38,333 page, and that we're both feeling that we're equally 1129 00:40:38,458 --> 00:40:40,000 putting into the relationship, which-- which I do 1130 00:40:40,083 --> 00:40:41,500 right now and everything else. 1131 00:40:41,625 --> 00:40:43,083 So I think that's-- that's more important 1132 00:40:43,208 --> 00:40:45,667 to me than having sex. 1133 00:40:45,792 --> 00:40:47,167 - I agree. 1134 00:40:47,333 --> 00:40:48,833 I'm glad we're always on the same page. 1135 00:40:48,958 --> 00:40:52,458 ♪ ♪ 1136 00:40:52,542 --> 00:40:56,667 - ♪ Breathe with me ♪ 1137 00:40:56,792 --> 00:40:58,792 ♪ ♪ 1138 00:40:58,875 --> 00:41:01,000 - Did you notice last night that this exercise 1139 00:41:01,083 --> 00:41:02,458 is called just the tip? 1140 00:41:02,542 --> 00:41:03,750 - Is it really? 1141 00:41:03,875 --> 00:41:05,833 How appropriate. 1142 00:41:05,958 --> 00:41:07,792 I'm very comfortable talking about sex. 1143 00:41:07,917 --> 00:41:10,583 I have no qualms or inhibitions to talk about sex. 1144 00:41:10,708 --> 00:41:13,417 I mean, it's-- it's a human reaction. 1145 00:41:13,542 --> 00:41:15,333 It's-- it's what makes us human. 1146 00:41:15,500 --> 00:41:16,750 It's part of what makes us human 1147 00:41:16,875 --> 00:41:19,708 and to, like, have that sexual desire and that, 1148 00:41:19,875 --> 00:41:22,333 God, animalistic ability almost, 1149 00:41:22,458 --> 00:41:23,875 I think is-- it's unbelievable. 1150 00:41:24,042 --> 00:41:25,083 It's amazing. 1151 00:41:26,708 --> 00:41:30,042 - Hank, can you please close your ears for these questions? 1152 00:41:30,167 --> 00:41:31,083 "What's a safe word?" 1153 00:41:31,208 --> 00:41:33,083 Never needed one. 1154 00:41:33,208 --> 00:41:34,750 - Porcupine. 1155 00:41:34,875 --> 00:41:38,625 - I think it would be stop, don't do that again. 1156 00:41:38,750 --> 00:41:40,500 - It's got to be fun, though. 1157 00:41:40,625 --> 00:41:41,792 Tres leches. 1158 00:41:41,875 --> 00:41:44,000 - [laughs] Are you making a safe 1159 00:41:44,125 --> 00:41:45,583 word for if we did have sex? 1160 00:41:45,708 --> 00:41:46,792 It would be that? 1161 00:41:46,875 --> 00:41:48,292 - Yeah. 1162 00:41:48,417 --> 00:41:49,667 Sending nudes? 1163 00:41:49,792 --> 00:41:50,958 - I'm all right with it. 1164 00:41:51,083 --> 00:41:53,500 How do you feel about sending nudes? 1165 00:41:53,583 --> 00:41:54,458 - Oh, all for it. - You do? 1166 00:41:54,542 --> 00:41:55,542 - Yeah. 1167 00:41:55,667 --> 00:41:56,875 - You send dick pics? 1168 00:41:57,042 --> 00:41:58,500 - I don't send dick pics. I send nudes. 1169 00:41:58,667 --> 00:41:59,875 - Well, what would a nude-- well, yeah. 1170 00:42:00,000 --> 00:42:01,000 - The whole thing. - Just, like, abs? 1171 00:42:01,125 --> 00:42:02,042 - You know, like-- 1172 00:42:02,167 --> 00:42:03,667 - No, you've done that? 1173 00:42:03,792 --> 00:42:08,000 - Of course, landscape, portrait, 3-D. 1174 00:42:08,083 --> 00:42:10,000 - Is this with, like, girls that you've date-- like, 1175 00:42:10,125 --> 00:42:11,625 anyone or, like, do you have to be in, like, 1176 00:42:11,750 --> 00:42:12,792 a serious relationship? 1177 00:42:12,917 --> 00:42:13,958 - Yeah. 1178 00:42:14,042 --> 00:42:16,458 - Well, that's a genuine question. 1179 00:42:16,583 --> 00:42:18,125 I've, like, kind of been involved with guys that I'm 1180 00:42:18,250 --> 00:42:20,667 not, like, in a serious, committed relationship, 1181 00:42:20,792 --> 00:42:22,708 and I've sent nudes before. 1182 00:42:22,833 --> 00:42:24,083 - Yeah, no, this is-- yeah, this is serious relationships. 1183 00:42:24,208 --> 00:42:25,500 - You only send them if you're, like, committed? 1184 00:42:25,583 --> 00:42:26,833 - Yeah. 1185 00:42:26,917 --> 00:42:30,667 - What is a must for you during sex? 1186 00:42:30,792 --> 00:42:33,333 - For the other partner to climax. 1187 00:42:33,500 --> 00:42:36,500 - OK, amazing. 1188 00:42:36,583 --> 00:42:39,083 - What is your favorite position? 1189 00:42:39,208 --> 00:42:40,375 - Mm. 1190 00:42:40,542 --> 00:42:44,333 This is getting to be too much. 1191 00:42:44,500 --> 00:42:45,542 - Tres leches? 1192 00:42:45,667 --> 00:42:49,417 - Yes, tres-- my safe word. 1193 00:42:49,542 --> 00:42:51,000 Well, I guess it would depend on-- 1194 00:42:51,125 --> 00:42:52,458 [knock at door] 1195 00:42:52,542 --> 00:42:53,667 --if the door knocks or not, yeah. 1196 00:42:53,833 --> 00:42:55,542 - Saved by the-- - Get them! 1197 00:42:55,708 --> 00:42:57,125 - OK, OK. - Get them! 1198 00:42:57,208 --> 00:42:58,625 - OK. 1199 00:42:58,708 --> 00:43:00,333 - It's all the toys for the buddies. 1200 00:43:00,458 --> 00:43:01,708 - OK, no, it's definitely-- 1201 00:43:01,875 --> 00:43:02,583 - He's gonna think it is, probably. 1202 00:43:02,708 --> 00:43:04,000 - It's definitely toys. 1203 00:43:04,125 --> 00:43:05,083 I don't think for the buddy, though. 1204 00:43:05,208 --> 00:43:07,042 Get back, get back. 1205 00:43:07,167 --> 00:43:08,958 - Well, we'll let us decide if they're going to Hank or not. 1206 00:43:09,042 --> 00:43:12,708 I'm trying to stay open-minded to what Dr. Pia is assigning. 1207 00:43:12,833 --> 00:43:15,500 We are committed and really trying 1208 00:43:15,625 --> 00:43:17,792 whatever we can to see if we can build 1209 00:43:17,875 --> 00:43:19,833 that intimate relationship. 1210 00:43:19,958 --> 00:43:22,833 - "Clint and Gina, I think it would be great for the two 1211 00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:25,292 "of you to practice a modified version 1212 00:43:25,375 --> 00:43:28,167 of sensate-focused therapy." 1213 00:43:28,292 --> 00:43:31,125 - But I don't know if I'll be able to complete 1214 00:43:31,250 --> 00:43:32,833 these exercises. 1215 00:43:32,958 --> 00:43:34,958 I'm definitely someone that has to process. 1216 00:43:35,042 --> 00:43:36,750 I think I can, like, catch the defense 1217 00:43:36,875 --> 00:43:39,375 quick if I'm feeling a little bit awkward or 1218 00:43:39,500 --> 00:43:41,500 uncomfortable, so-- 1219 00:43:41,583 --> 00:43:43,167 ♪ ♪ 1220 00:43:43,250 --> 00:43:45,458 [laughs] 1221 00:43:45,583 --> 00:43:46,667 --we're going to do all of them. 1222 00:43:46,750 --> 00:43:48,250 - Yeah, we got to do all of them. 1223 00:43:48,375 --> 00:43:49,750 - This guy? 1224 00:43:49,875 --> 00:43:53,167 I mean, obviously, this will feel good. 1225 00:43:53,250 --> 00:43:55,500 Are you like, nope? 1226 00:43:55,625 --> 00:43:56,542 Doesn't do it like the feather? 1227 00:43:56,708 --> 00:43:58,750 - No, it's good. 1228 00:43:58,875 --> 00:44:00,208 I think it would-- you gotta do it-- yeah, 1229 00:44:00,333 --> 00:44:01,333 you gotta do it on the back. 1230 00:44:01,417 --> 00:44:02,833 - Yeah. 1231 00:44:02,917 --> 00:44:03,708 - I think that they want you to do that. 1232 00:44:03,875 --> 00:44:04,875 - You're like, it's OK. 1233 00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:06,667 You can do this for an hour. 1234 00:44:06,750 --> 00:44:07,667 - I think they want you to do that for 15 minute-- 1235 00:44:07,792 --> 00:44:10,083 yeah, keep and more pressure. 1236 00:44:10,208 --> 00:44:12,167 - Listen, my shoulders are the ones that 1237 00:44:12,250 --> 00:44:14,333 have been working all day. 1238 00:44:14,458 --> 00:44:16,750 - Mine, too, sailing. 1239 00:44:16,875 --> 00:44:18,125 - OK, so there's that. 1240 00:44:18,208 --> 00:44:20,375 - Yeah, oh, the brush. 1241 00:44:20,542 --> 00:44:22,750 - We might not get through 15 minutes, but we'll try. 1242 00:44:22,875 --> 00:44:24,250 Wait, do we do back-- - I think so. 1243 00:44:24,375 --> 00:44:25,292 - --on that? 1244 00:44:25,375 --> 00:44:26,500 - Oh, that feels good. 1245 00:44:26,583 --> 00:44:27,875 - Better than the other thing? 1246 00:44:28,042 --> 00:44:29,917 - I think so. - Really? 1247 00:44:30,042 --> 00:44:31,333 - Yeah. 1248 00:44:31,417 --> 00:44:32,667 - Why haven't I thought of having this before? 1249 00:44:32,792 --> 00:44:34,000 - That's a good idea. 1250 00:44:34,167 --> 00:44:35,167 - Oh, yeah. 1251 00:44:35,292 --> 00:44:36,333 - Right? 1252 00:44:36,417 --> 00:44:37,333 No, I'll get to you. 1253 00:44:37,417 --> 00:44:39,167 - Oh, OK. 1254 00:44:39,292 --> 00:44:43,667 [laughs] 1255 00:44:43,833 --> 00:44:45,958 - Oh, yeah, comb the arm hair. 1256 00:44:46,042 --> 00:44:47,500 There's so much. 1257 00:44:47,667 --> 00:44:51,000 - [laughs] A little werewolf. 1258 00:44:51,083 --> 00:44:52,667 [laughs] 1259 00:44:52,750 --> 00:44:54,500 - All right, your turn. - OK. 1260 00:44:54,583 --> 00:44:56,500 - Give me some skin. 1261 00:44:56,583 --> 00:45:03,417 - [sighs] Love the feather. 1262 00:45:03,542 --> 00:45:05,333 - OK. - OK. 1263 00:45:05,417 --> 00:45:06,500 - Device one. 1264 00:45:06,625 --> 00:45:07,583 I'm gonna do it in the same-- 1265 00:45:07,708 --> 00:45:09,042 - Don't light that on fire. 1266 00:45:09,167 --> 00:45:10,583 - --I'm gonna do it in the same order. 1267 00:45:10,708 --> 00:45:11,500 That was good for it. 1268 00:45:11,625 --> 00:45:14,458 - Oh, yeah. 1269 00:45:14,542 --> 00:45:18,042 Oh, yeah, I love massages. 1270 00:45:18,167 --> 00:45:19,667 That one's gonna end up actually beating 1271 00:45:19,833 --> 00:45:21,125 out the feather, I think. 1272 00:45:21,250 --> 00:45:23,958 - OK. - OK. 1273 00:45:24,042 --> 00:45:26,167 - This one's gonna be more difficult because you got-- 1274 00:45:26,292 --> 00:45:27,500 - Because I got too many things going on. 1275 00:45:27,667 --> 00:45:28,875 - --thing on. 1276 00:45:29,042 --> 00:45:30,500 I think I'm just gonna go straight skin 1277 00:45:30,583 --> 00:45:31,625 because it feels good over the shirt, 1278 00:45:31,708 --> 00:45:33,333 but your shirt is different. - Yeah 1279 00:45:33,417 --> 00:45:35,000 - You've got, like, ridges. 1280 00:45:35,167 --> 00:45:37,667 - Who knew a hairbrush would do that? 1281 00:45:37,750 --> 00:45:38,667 - Yeah. 1282 00:45:38,792 --> 00:45:40,375 - I like it. 1283 00:45:40,500 --> 00:45:43,708 - Yeah, it probably exfoliates a little bit, too. 1284 00:45:43,833 --> 00:45:46,167 So what's the winner? 1285 00:45:46,292 --> 00:45:49,500 - For sexual context, probably the feathers. 1286 00:45:49,625 --> 00:45:51,417 - Yeah. 1287 00:45:51,542 --> 00:45:53,667 - Well, this isn't as awkward as I thought it was gonna be. 1288 00:45:53,792 --> 00:45:55,000 - Yeah. 1289 00:45:55,125 --> 00:45:57,792 Yeah, I think we built on, you know, 1290 00:45:57,875 --> 00:46:00,208 more of that physicality aspect, 1291 00:46:00,333 --> 00:46:01,917 you know, something that's been missing. 1292 00:46:02,042 --> 00:46:05,583 So it's slowly, you know, bringing us 1293 00:46:05,708 --> 00:46:08,000 into that comfortability of, like, 1294 00:46:08,125 --> 00:46:11,708 touch is OK, right, if it's got good intentions 1295 00:46:11,833 --> 00:46:13,250 and goodwill behind it. - Baby-- 1296 00:46:13,375 --> 00:46:14,167 - That's right. 1297 00:46:14,292 --> 00:46:15,667 - --steps. 1298 00:46:15,792 --> 00:46:17,875 ♪ ♪ 1299 00:46:21,667 --> 00:46:24,125 - ♪ But can you do me this way? ♪ 1300 00:46:24,208 --> 00:46:25,667 ♪ ♪ 1301 00:46:25,792 --> 00:46:28,083 ♪ I'm really trying to think straight ♪ 1302 00:46:28,208 --> 00:46:30,750 ♪ Wham bam, thank you, ma'am ♪ 1303 00:46:30,875 --> 00:46:31,792 - You can't see? 1304 00:46:31,875 --> 00:46:33,750 - No, I cannot. 1305 00:46:33,875 --> 00:46:36,667 - Dr. Pia gave Kirsten and I an assignment. 1306 00:46:36,792 --> 00:46:39,042 - What you're both gonna do is pick out items 1307 00:46:39,208 --> 00:46:43,500 that you would find sexy, and you're gonna be blindfolded 1308 00:46:43,625 --> 00:46:45,000 and have to lead each other. 1309 00:46:45,125 --> 00:46:47,667 And I'm hopeful that once you find the items, 1310 00:46:47,750 --> 00:46:49,542 you'll feel comfortable using them. 1311 00:46:49,667 --> 00:46:51,417 - It's the opportunity to let the-- 1312 00:46:51,542 --> 00:46:53,417 trust the person. 1313 00:46:53,542 --> 00:46:55,333 And I think that will open up another level of vulnerability 1314 00:46:55,458 --> 00:46:57,583 for her. 1315 00:46:57,708 --> 00:46:59,125 No, I'm over here. - [laughs] I'm not. 1316 00:46:59,250 --> 00:47:01,125 I'm not. I'm not. 1317 00:47:01,250 --> 00:47:03,125 I'm about to take this-- ooh, I'm 1318 00:47:03,250 --> 00:47:07,333 about to take this blindfold off, because you're playing. 1319 00:47:07,458 --> 00:47:08,333 - Come here. 1320 00:47:08,458 --> 00:47:09,542 - No. 1321 00:47:09,667 --> 00:47:11,125 - What? 1322 00:47:11,250 --> 00:47:12,542 - Because you're gonna tell me to come all 1323 00:47:12,667 --> 00:47:13,583 the way over there, and then you're 1324 00:47:13,708 --> 00:47:15,000 gonna move somewhere else. 1325 00:47:15,125 --> 00:47:16,625 - So you're saying you don't trust me? 1326 00:47:16,708 --> 00:47:18,417 That's what it is? - I do trust you. 1327 00:47:18,542 --> 00:47:19,583 I'm listening to you, but you're not-- you directing me 1328 00:47:19,708 --> 00:47:21,042 to different places. - I'm directing. 1329 00:47:21,208 --> 00:47:23,083 I said, listen to my voice, listen to the instructions. 1330 00:47:23,208 --> 00:47:24,042 - OK. 1331 00:47:24,167 --> 00:47:28,375 - I want to clean my clothes. 1332 00:47:28,542 --> 00:47:29,750 What do I do? 1333 00:47:29,875 --> 00:47:30,958 - Wash your clothes. 1334 00:47:31,083 --> 00:47:32,750 - OK, that's the first clue. 1335 00:47:32,875 --> 00:47:35,250 - So it's in the washer? 1336 00:47:35,375 --> 00:47:38,000 Does that make sense? 1337 00:47:38,125 --> 00:47:41,167 Don't try to run pass me, Shaquille. 1338 00:47:41,292 --> 00:47:43,208 I'm not about to run into anything. 1339 00:47:43,333 --> 00:47:47,375 - Walk straight. 1340 00:47:47,542 --> 00:47:48,333 - Shaquille, I-- 1341 00:47:48,500 --> 00:47:50,833 I'm nervous. 1342 00:47:50,958 --> 00:47:51,833 That was a good clue. 1343 00:47:51,958 --> 00:47:53,792 Let's see if it's in here. 1344 00:47:53,875 --> 00:47:56,042 ♪ ♪ 1345 00:47:56,167 --> 00:47:59,042 What is this, a jump rope or something? 1346 00:47:59,167 --> 00:48:00,375 A rope? 1347 00:48:00,542 --> 00:48:02,667 What about it? 1348 00:48:02,792 --> 00:48:04,833 Am I putting these together? 1349 00:48:04,958 --> 00:48:08,375 - So if I was to-- 1350 00:48:08,500 --> 00:48:12,000 ♪ ♪ 1351 00:48:12,125 --> 00:48:15,583 - Why are you tying me up? 1352 00:48:15,708 --> 00:48:17,292 Are you trying to kidnap me? 1353 00:48:17,417 --> 00:48:18,875 Oh goodness, this is kind of hard, 1354 00:48:19,042 --> 00:48:22,000 but I like the rope around me. 1355 00:48:22,125 --> 00:48:24,000 - Do you have control? 1356 00:48:24,125 --> 00:48:25,375 - No, I don't have any control. 1357 00:48:25,542 --> 00:48:26,917 - Right. 1358 00:48:27,042 --> 00:48:28,583 So sometimes you have to let me take control. 1359 00:48:28,708 --> 00:48:30,208 - You have control right now. 1360 00:48:30,375 --> 00:48:32,792 It's getting very hot and bothered. 1361 00:48:32,917 --> 00:48:36,375 I really like allowing our bodies and our voices 1362 00:48:36,500 --> 00:48:39,917 to lead us into whatever we're about to do. 1363 00:48:40,042 --> 00:48:43,625 - Just play with it with your fingers. 1364 00:48:43,750 --> 00:48:44,500 - What is this, some lube? 1365 00:48:44,667 --> 00:48:45,625 - Mm-hmm. 1366 00:48:45,750 --> 00:48:46,833 - Some lubricant? 1367 00:48:46,958 --> 00:48:47,667 - Liquid lubricant. 1368 00:48:47,833 --> 00:48:48,875 - Oh my god. 1369 00:48:49,042 --> 00:48:50,833 Is it bubble bath or something? 1370 00:48:50,917 --> 00:48:52,167 - This is great bath soap. 1371 00:48:52,250 --> 00:48:54,125 - Is this another little toy? 1372 00:48:54,208 --> 00:48:56,458 I feel like I'm transforming, honestly. 1373 00:48:56,542 --> 00:48:58,000 Like, he can lead me. 1374 00:48:58,167 --> 00:49:01,500 Like, I can listen to this man. 1375 00:49:01,667 --> 00:49:05,000 I feel like that is kind of what our trust is building 1376 00:49:05,125 --> 00:49:10,500 upon is, like, me unraveling myself from being in control 1377 00:49:10,625 --> 00:49:12,750 a lot of time and allowing myself to trust you, 1378 00:49:12,875 --> 00:49:14,375 so that was-- 1379 00:49:14,500 --> 00:49:16,500 - That's why I got the rope because you always-- 1380 00:49:16,625 --> 00:49:18,208 you always want control. 1381 00:49:18,333 --> 00:49:19,125 - Mm-hmm. 1382 00:49:19,208 --> 00:49:21,083 - Like, no, not this time. 1383 00:49:21,208 --> 00:49:23,000 I still think we got some things we can work through, 1384 00:49:23,167 --> 00:49:25,667 you know, in our marriage, you know, as far as some things, 1385 00:49:25,833 --> 00:49:28,708 like, we both want and, like, compromising and everything. 1386 00:49:28,833 --> 00:49:30,625 But I know it's gonna take some time. 1387 00:49:30,708 --> 00:49:33,833 - What are some of the things you think we have to work on? 1388 00:49:34,000 --> 00:49:35,542 - Just, like, communication and everything. 1389 00:49:35,667 --> 00:49:37,458 - Yeah. 1390 00:49:37,542 --> 00:49:39,333 - Like, even though I was gone for a few days, it was like, 1391 00:49:39,458 --> 00:49:42,750 I know, like, we both could have communicated better. 1392 00:49:42,875 --> 00:49:46,625 Let's schedule a time to talk to check in other than letting 1393 00:49:46,750 --> 00:49:48,208 the whole day go by. 1394 00:49:48,333 --> 00:49:50,833 - I mean, and, for me, I knew what you were, 1395 00:49:50,917 --> 00:49:53,500 you know, in Memphis for. 1396 00:49:53,583 --> 00:49:54,917 - Really-- really and truthfully, I just-- 1397 00:49:55,042 --> 00:49:58,167 I just really wanted you there. 1398 00:49:58,250 --> 00:50:01,583 - The fact that you're telling me this right now 1399 00:50:01,708 --> 00:50:04,250 and you never said that while you were there, if you would 1400 00:50:04,375 --> 00:50:05,667 have said that while you were there, 1401 00:50:05,750 --> 00:50:07,458 if you really wanted me-- 1402 00:50:07,583 --> 00:50:08,667 - No, you already had-- you had already planned things. 1403 00:50:08,833 --> 00:50:10,000 And Shaquille is out. 1404 00:50:10,125 --> 00:50:12,625 Let me-- let me go run the streets. 1405 00:50:12,750 --> 00:50:15,583 ♪ ♪ 1406 00:50:15,708 --> 00:50:17,875 She said the next work event, I'm coming to support you. 1407 00:50:18,000 --> 00:50:20,708 And we talked about going to Memphis, her and I. 1408 00:50:20,833 --> 00:50:24,167 And in that moment, I was packing my clothes. 1409 00:50:24,333 --> 00:50:25,958 Kirsten said, you know, I'm just not gonna go. 1410 00:50:26,083 --> 00:50:28,042 I have this set up, and I have this event. 1411 00:50:28,167 --> 00:50:30,167 I was like, well, when did all of this happen? 1412 00:50:30,250 --> 00:50:33,333 And it was another eye-opener for me, 1413 00:50:33,458 --> 00:50:36,250 like, to say, like, so you made plans without me when we 1414 00:50:36,375 --> 00:50:38,333 already had plans established. 1415 00:50:38,417 --> 00:50:41,167 - Right now, it sounds like you really wanted me to be there. 1416 00:50:41,250 --> 00:50:44,625 But when you told me at first, it never sounds like you 1417 00:50:44,750 --> 00:50:46,167 really want me to be there. 1418 00:50:46,333 --> 00:50:48,583 - But if I tell you I want you to do something, 1419 00:50:48,708 --> 00:50:50,667 that's my expectation. 1420 00:50:50,750 --> 00:50:52,958 Why does I-- why do I have to keep 1421 00:50:53,083 --> 00:50:55,542 reiterating that I want you to do something 1422 00:50:55,708 --> 00:50:56,542 if we talked about it? 1423 00:50:56,708 --> 00:50:58,250 I'm not gonna beg you. 1424 00:50:58,375 --> 00:51:00,083 - I don't want you to beg me. 1425 00:51:00,208 --> 00:51:01,833 But like, when you're sitting here, saying, 1426 00:51:01,958 --> 00:51:04,000 Kirsten, I really wish you were there 1427 00:51:04,083 --> 00:51:06,792 and I really had wanted you to come, like, that just 1428 00:51:06,875 --> 00:51:08,333 makes me feel terrible. 1429 00:51:08,500 --> 00:51:11,333 - Can you imagine how I feel then? 1430 00:51:11,458 --> 00:51:15,250 - I don't want you to keep feeling like this, 1431 00:51:15,375 --> 00:51:17,750 like that I don't want to be there, I don't want to support 1432 00:51:17,875 --> 00:51:21,042 you, because I do, OK? 1433 00:51:21,167 --> 00:51:22,875 - I hear you. 1434 00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:24,667 - All right. 1435 00:51:24,833 --> 00:51:25,750 - I said I hear you. 1436 00:51:25,875 --> 00:51:27,083 - No, I said OK. 1437 00:51:27,208 --> 00:51:28,583 I said all right. 1438 00:51:28,708 --> 00:51:30,792 ♪ ♪ 1439 00:51:30,875 --> 00:51:34,333 Come on. 1440 00:51:37,292 --> 00:51:40,708 - Happy is a stretch. 1441 00:51:40,875 --> 00:51:44,292 I would definitely say I'm grateful 1442 00:51:44,375 --> 00:51:47,708 and I'm overjoyed to be in this marriage. 1443 00:51:47,833 --> 00:51:51,125 I haven't got to that happy place where I feel like she 1444 00:51:51,208 --> 00:51:53,667 honestly, truly supports me and things 1445 00:51:53,792 --> 00:51:55,333 that I love to do in my life. 1446 00:51:55,458 --> 00:52:00,542 ♪ ♪ 1447 00:52:00,667 --> 00:52:02,583 Get out my face. 1448 00:52:06,292 --> 00:52:09,375 [upbeat music] 1449 00:52:09,500 --> 00:52:13,792 ♪ ♪ 1450 00:52:13,875 --> 00:52:15,625 - If I can make contact-- that's gonna be the hardest. 1451 00:52:15,708 --> 00:52:17,000 - Oh, yeah, for sure. 1452 00:52:17,167 --> 00:52:18,708 - I'm not worried about the power. 1453 00:52:18,833 --> 00:52:22,083 - I haven't hit or held a bat since, ooh, probably 20 years, 1454 00:52:22,208 --> 00:52:24,208 since I was 11. 1455 00:52:24,375 --> 00:52:26,333 We used to live across the street from a baseball field, 1456 00:52:26,458 --> 00:52:27,875 and I played Little League. 1457 00:52:28,042 --> 00:52:29,542 And since then, I haven't been back. 1458 00:52:29,667 --> 00:52:32,625 So it feels great to bring me back to my childhood. 1459 00:52:32,750 --> 00:52:35,417 - We've got the pitching machine set up out here today. 1460 00:52:35,542 --> 00:52:38,417 It'll probably be at about 60-ish miles an hour. 1461 00:52:38,542 --> 00:52:39,542 We'll see if we can crank it up. 1462 00:52:39,708 --> 00:52:41,250 - That's not bad. 1463 00:52:41,375 --> 00:52:42,625 - Airris, he wants a hundred. He wants a hundred. 1464 00:52:42,708 --> 00:52:44,333 - I do not want a hundred. - A hundred? 1465 00:52:44,458 --> 00:52:45,250 All right, well, we'll see how we can do there. 1466 00:52:45,375 --> 00:52:46,583 - Right on. - Sweet. 1467 00:52:46,708 --> 00:52:48,167 - Let's do it. 1468 00:52:48,292 --> 00:52:49,917 - Let's do it, Airris. 1469 00:52:50,042 --> 00:52:51,667 - I was known more for my field play, but we'll see. 1470 00:52:51,833 --> 00:52:58,667 ♪ ♪ 1471 00:53:00,000 --> 00:53:00,917 That's a single right there. 1472 00:53:01,042 --> 00:53:03,458 - There you go. 1473 00:53:03,583 --> 00:53:07,958 ♪ ♪ 1474 00:53:08,083 --> 00:53:10,125 - Oh, that's a good hit right there. 1475 00:53:10,250 --> 00:53:12,208 ♪ ♪ 1476 00:53:12,333 --> 00:53:13,750 Oh. - Hey. 1477 00:53:13,875 --> 00:53:14,833 - There we go. - Hey. 1478 00:53:15,000 --> 00:53:18,417 ♪ ♪ 1479 00:53:18,542 --> 00:53:20,542 - Yeah, put those Daisy Dukes into it. 1480 00:53:20,667 --> 00:53:21,917 - [laughs] 1481 00:53:22,042 --> 00:53:23,708 - ♪ Superstar ♪ 1482 00:53:23,833 --> 00:53:25,458 - Here we go. 1483 00:53:25,583 --> 00:53:29,000 ♪ ♪ 1484 00:53:29,125 --> 00:53:30,708 - Oh. 1485 00:53:30,833 --> 00:53:34,167 - That first one does come fast at you. 1486 00:53:34,292 --> 00:53:36,667 - Here we go, that golf swing. 1487 00:53:36,792 --> 00:53:37,917 Ooh, there you go. 1488 00:53:38,042 --> 00:53:38,833 - I'm feeling that breeze. 1489 00:53:38,958 --> 00:53:41,292 Appreciate it, bruh. 1490 00:53:41,375 --> 00:53:42,833 Can you lower it to, like, 20? - [laughs] 1491 00:53:42,958 --> 00:53:44,208 - These are all crazy. 1492 00:53:44,333 --> 00:53:47,083 - Throw it underhand to him, maybe. 1493 00:53:47,208 --> 00:53:50,167 - Oh, that's way too slow. 1494 00:53:50,292 --> 00:53:51,750 - [laughs] - Come on, Clint. 1495 00:53:51,875 --> 00:53:53,542 - Throw his back out. - Oh, speed it up. 1496 00:53:53,708 --> 00:53:54,875 - Strive for that greatness. - It's too slow. 1497 00:53:55,042 --> 00:53:56,500 - Slowing it out. 1498 00:53:56,583 --> 00:53:58,292 ♪ ♪ 1499 00:53:58,417 --> 00:53:59,958 - There we go. - There's a nice hit. 1500 00:54:00,083 --> 00:54:01,167 - All right. - That's a double. 1501 00:54:01,333 --> 00:54:03,000 - He found his groove. 1502 00:54:03,083 --> 00:54:07,750 ♪ ♪ 1503 00:54:07,875 --> 00:54:09,083 - Hey. - Hello. 1504 00:54:09,208 --> 00:54:10,208 - Hi. 1505 00:54:10,375 --> 00:54:12,292 - This is so cute in here. 1506 00:54:12,375 --> 00:54:14,500 - These other women make me feel so comfortable, 1507 00:54:14,625 --> 00:54:16,292 and I love hanging out with them. 1508 00:54:16,417 --> 00:54:18,292 But we haven't really gotten together in a while, 1509 00:54:18,417 --> 00:54:20,667 so today we're making cocktails. 1510 00:54:20,833 --> 00:54:22,542 The last time we all got together, 1511 00:54:22,667 --> 00:54:26,792 we were with our husbands, and you don't get the real tea 1512 00:54:26,875 --> 00:54:27,750 when husbands are around. 1513 00:54:27,875 --> 00:54:29,167 - Well, hello. 1514 00:54:29,292 --> 00:54:30,208 How are you today? - I'm doing well. 1515 00:54:30,375 --> 00:54:31,333 How y'all doing? - Good. 1516 00:54:31,417 --> 00:54:32,292 - We're doing great. 1517 00:54:32,375 --> 00:54:34,333 - My name is Freddie. 1518 00:54:34,500 --> 00:54:36,167 I'm the chief cocktail officer here at Liquor Lab. 1519 00:54:36,292 --> 00:54:39,250 We're gonna jump into our first cocktail. 1520 00:54:39,375 --> 00:54:40,542 Espresso martinis fans? - Yes. 1521 00:54:40,708 --> 00:54:41,583 - Oh, yes. - One or two of us? 1522 00:54:41,708 --> 00:54:43,000 Cool. 1523 00:54:43,125 --> 00:54:44,542 We're gonna make an espresso martini. 1524 00:54:44,667 --> 00:54:47,167 So typically, we'd make this drink with vodka. 1525 00:54:47,292 --> 00:54:48,542 So we call this one black lightning. 1526 00:54:48,708 --> 00:54:50,208 In that little ramekin in front of you, 1527 00:54:50,333 --> 00:54:52,417 you have your cold-brew coffee. 1528 00:54:52,542 --> 00:54:55,042 Just go ahead and add that to your mixed drinks. 1529 00:54:55,208 --> 00:54:56,500 It's actually cold-brew concentrate. 1530 00:54:56,625 --> 00:54:57,958 - The glass? - That's a funny-looking glass. 1531 00:54:58,042 --> 00:54:59,500 - Yeah. - Oh, mothertrucker. 1532 00:54:59,583 --> 00:55:00,625 - Oh, no. 1533 00:55:00,708 --> 00:55:02,500 - Oh, Gina. 1534 00:55:02,625 --> 00:55:05,875 - Now, listen, I did bartend for about 13 years of my life. 1535 00:55:06,000 --> 00:55:08,292 I know that's, like, giving away my age. 1536 00:55:08,375 --> 00:55:11,250 But my bartending was more in, like, high volume. 1537 00:55:11,375 --> 00:55:13,250 So we were working with plastic cups, 1538 00:55:13,375 --> 00:55:15,542 just throwing out beers, things like that. 1539 00:55:15,667 --> 00:55:17,167 ♪ ♪ 1540 00:55:17,333 --> 00:55:18,417 - Now we have the Goldilocks moment. 1541 00:55:18,542 --> 00:55:20,250 This is very important. 1542 00:55:20,375 --> 00:55:22,333 Take a sip and understand that you can adjust it. 1543 00:55:22,458 --> 00:55:24,167 You can fix it if you want. 1544 00:55:24,292 --> 00:55:26,208 You have a little more of that demerara sugar 1545 00:55:26,375 --> 00:55:27,875 syrup, that round enough, if you want to-- if it's 1546 00:55:28,042 --> 00:55:29,833 too kind of strong. 1547 00:55:29,917 --> 00:55:31,458 - I like mine. 1548 00:55:31,542 --> 00:55:33,333 - I feel very good about what I've done here today. 1549 00:55:33,500 --> 00:55:35,000 - OK, this is waking me up right now. 1550 00:55:35,083 --> 00:55:36,333 - [laughs] 1551 00:55:36,500 --> 00:55:38,000 - I'm pretty pumped. I'm ready. 1552 00:55:38,125 --> 00:55:39,792 - Yeah, I'm pretty pumped up. - All right, cool. 1553 00:55:39,917 --> 00:55:41,208 I'm gonna leave you with your cocktail, let you enjoy. 1554 00:55:41,375 --> 00:55:42,292 - OK, thank you. - Well, thanks, Freddie. 1555 00:55:42,417 --> 00:55:44,833 - Yes, thank you so much. 1556 00:55:44,917 --> 00:55:46,792 - We have a lot to catch up on, I feel like. 1557 00:55:46,875 --> 00:55:48,333 - Yes. 1558 00:55:48,500 --> 00:55:49,500 - You said difficult. Why so difficult? 1559 00:55:49,625 --> 00:55:51,583 - What are we catching up on? 1560 00:55:51,708 --> 00:55:53,167 - Oh my gosh, we haven't seen each other since our one-month 1561 00:55:53,250 --> 00:55:54,042 anniversary dinner. - Yes, our one month. 1562 00:55:54,167 --> 00:55:55,542 - Yeah. 1563 00:55:55,667 --> 00:55:57,125 - How's everybody's weeks been? 1564 00:55:57,208 --> 00:55:58,500 - Y'all had some sex talks this week? 1565 00:55:58,625 --> 00:56:00,167 Dr. Pia visit y'all? 1566 00:56:00,292 --> 00:56:01,333 - Yeah, I mean, it's no secret about us. 1567 00:56:01,458 --> 00:56:02,333 - You're hitting home runs. 1568 00:56:02,458 --> 00:56:03,625 - I was about to say, you-- 1569 00:56:03,708 --> 00:56:05,042 - Right. 1570 00:56:05,167 --> 00:56:06,125 - I mean, the conversation was good. 1571 00:56:06,208 --> 00:56:08,125 But it was just about Nicole has 1572 00:56:08,250 --> 00:56:11,458 some, like, self-worth issues. 1573 00:56:11,583 --> 00:56:14,000 - I really need to do a lot of personal work. 1574 00:56:14,125 --> 00:56:16,917 Because, you know, it just came to light that I 1575 00:56:17,042 --> 00:56:18,792 have all this work to do. 1576 00:56:18,875 --> 00:56:21,208 And there's really not much he can do in terms of helping, 1577 00:56:21,375 --> 00:56:23,542 because it is so internal. 1578 00:56:23,667 --> 00:56:26,458 But I need him to-- you know, if he sees me looking upset, 1579 00:56:26,583 --> 00:56:28,500 instead of saying, like, when you're ready to talk about it, 1580 00:56:28,625 --> 00:56:30,583 I need him to be like, talk to me, 1581 00:56:30,708 --> 00:56:33,042 because I feel like, I hate to say it, 1582 00:56:33,167 --> 00:56:34,708 but he's almost too respectful. 1583 00:56:34,875 --> 00:56:36,500 Like, he sees me getting upset, and it's like, I'm here 1584 00:56:36,625 --> 00:56:38,250 for you when you're ready. 1585 00:56:38,375 --> 00:56:41,167 But I'll never be ready if I'm given the option. 1586 00:56:41,333 --> 00:56:44,708 ♪ ♪ 1587 00:56:44,875 --> 00:56:50,042 - I would say we doing out of ten, seven, eight. 1588 00:56:50,167 --> 00:56:51,875 We're doing good. - OK. OK. 1589 00:56:52,042 --> 00:56:53,042 - But it's kind of like-- it's like little, nitpicky things. 1590 00:56:53,208 --> 00:56:54,875 - Little things, yeah. 1591 00:56:55,042 --> 00:56:56,792 - It's like the only thing that I asked for in the beginning 1592 00:56:56,875 --> 00:56:57,833 was support. 1593 00:56:57,917 --> 00:56:59,458 - Yeah. 1594 00:56:59,542 --> 00:57:01,708 - Like, support me in my job, support me in school. 1595 00:57:01,833 --> 00:57:03,708 But it's like, we getting further with intimacy 1596 00:57:03,875 --> 00:57:05,625 and chemistry and just kind of like, you know, 1597 00:57:05,750 --> 00:57:08,000 started kissing and everything, especially, like, 1598 00:57:08,125 --> 00:57:09,750 before bed and everything. 1599 00:57:09,875 --> 00:57:11,625 - Since we're at a baseball stadium, what would you say? 1600 00:57:11,708 --> 00:57:13,333 What, you're on first base? 1601 00:57:13,500 --> 00:57:14,958 [laughter] 1602 00:57:15,083 --> 00:57:17,042 ♪ ♪ 1603 00:57:20,875 --> 00:57:22,333 ♪ ♪ 1604 00:57:22,458 --> 00:57:24,125 - Second base, trying to get the third, you know? 1605 00:57:24,208 --> 00:57:25,708 Yeah. - OK. 1606 00:57:25,875 --> 00:57:26,583 - First base? 1607 00:57:26,708 --> 00:57:27,750 Like, where are we at? 1608 00:57:27,875 --> 00:57:29,500 - Yeah, like, are we exploring? 1609 00:57:29,583 --> 00:57:31,500 Do we know what we're working with, at least? 1610 00:57:31,625 --> 00:57:34,000 - We're working up to-- we're working up to it. 1611 00:57:34,083 --> 00:57:36,792 - Because it sounds like you've been building up the intimacy. 1612 00:57:36,875 --> 00:57:38,542 And I really respect that you're 1613 00:57:38,667 --> 00:57:40,167 waiting until you guys are fully ready, 1614 00:57:40,292 --> 00:57:41,667 but it sounds like we're ready. 1615 00:57:41,792 --> 00:57:43,583 We're just waiting for the right moment 1616 00:57:43,708 --> 00:57:45,625 where we feel ready. 1617 00:57:45,708 --> 00:57:47,208 - You want him to-- like, you want him to take control. 1618 00:57:47,375 --> 00:57:49,042 - I definitely want Shaquille to-- yeah, 1619 00:57:49,167 --> 00:57:51,375 I definitely want Shaquille to take the lead and to initiate 1620 00:57:51,542 --> 00:57:53,250 everything and to, you know, get me aroused 1621 00:57:53,375 --> 00:57:54,625 and in the mood. 1622 00:57:54,708 --> 00:57:55,875 - And you're not gonna turn him down. 1623 00:57:56,042 --> 00:57:57,583 - If he doesn't-- 1624 00:57:57,708 --> 00:57:59,042 - She's not gonna turn him down. 1625 00:57:59,208 --> 00:58:01,042 She's not gonna turn him down. 1626 00:58:01,167 --> 00:58:02,667 - Y'all are so funny. 1627 00:58:02,750 --> 00:58:04,625 I'm glad y'all are getting a lot of laughs out 1628 00:58:04,750 --> 00:58:06,500 of this and a lot of ideas. 1629 00:58:06,625 --> 00:58:07,708 - Shaq, can you hear me? 1630 00:58:07,875 --> 00:58:08,542 Shaq. 1631 00:58:08,708 --> 00:58:10,708 Tell him to initiate. 1632 00:58:10,833 --> 00:58:12,792 - She's ready to risk it all. 1633 00:58:12,917 --> 00:58:16,500 - Oh my gosh, y'all are hilarious. 1634 00:58:16,667 --> 00:58:18,667 - Oh, man, I mean, with baseball analogies, 1635 00:58:18,792 --> 00:58:20,333 I'd say we're not even in the dugout, man. 1636 00:58:20,417 --> 00:58:22,500 We're not even in the stadium. 1637 00:58:22,583 --> 00:58:23,875 - You guys are waiting in line to get in? 1638 00:58:24,000 --> 00:58:25,125 - Yeah. 1639 00:58:25,208 --> 00:58:26,750 - Same. 1640 00:58:26,875 --> 00:58:29,667 - Yeah, it's-- it's-- it's an interesting place 1641 00:58:29,750 --> 00:58:31,708 to be in because I'm just-- 1642 00:58:31,833 --> 00:58:34,750 I'm a sexual dude, and that's how I connect on another level 1643 00:58:34,875 --> 00:58:36,375 with somebody, you know? - Yeah. 1644 00:58:36,500 --> 00:58:37,792 - So I'm trying to work through, like, you know, 1645 00:58:37,917 --> 00:58:39,875 intimacy exercises, you know? 1646 00:58:40,000 --> 00:58:41,583 And I'm trying to keep an open mind. 1647 00:58:41,708 --> 00:58:42,958 I'm not trying to have a predetermined outcome. 1648 00:58:43,042 --> 00:58:44,375 - Right. 1649 00:58:44,500 --> 00:58:45,667 - Just like, I'm gonna try it and see 1650 00:58:45,792 --> 00:58:46,958 if it changes my outlook on things, 1651 00:58:47,042 --> 00:58:48,625 changes my perspective. - Yeah. 1652 00:58:48,750 --> 00:58:51,750 - We have to start building some sort of intimacy just 1653 00:58:51,875 --> 00:58:56,042 to figure out if we can sustain any type of healthy marriage. 1654 00:58:56,167 --> 00:58:58,083 Like, at the end of the day, we're not quitters, 1655 00:58:58,208 --> 00:58:59,542 and we're trying so hard. 1656 00:58:59,708 --> 00:59:00,333 And I'm like, I just want it to be there. 1657 00:59:00,458 --> 00:59:02,125 - Right. 1658 00:59:02,250 --> 00:59:04,167 - Dr. Pia visited us, but I feel like she already 1659 00:59:04,250 --> 00:59:05,542 knew we wasn't having sex. 1660 00:59:05,708 --> 00:59:06,958 So we didn't even talk about sex. 1661 00:59:07,083 --> 00:59:08,875 - Oh, yeah? What'd you talk about then? 1662 00:59:09,042 --> 00:59:10,417 - We just talked about, like, other ways to be intimate, 1663 00:59:10,542 --> 00:59:12,042 like, besides, like, sex. 1664 00:59:12,167 --> 00:59:13,917 I've had situations in the past where, 1665 00:59:14,042 --> 00:59:16,833 like, I've grown to like people past the physical. 1666 00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:19,917 So I'm trying to find, like, other ways that-- 1667 00:59:20,042 --> 00:59:24,500 that I can be turned on, and I just haven't gotten there yet. 1668 00:59:24,583 --> 00:59:25,917 - Even when we've, like, had conversations, like, 1669 00:59:26,042 --> 00:59:29,833 with the experts, he's like, yeah, like, 1670 00:59:29,917 --> 00:59:31,875 I'm gonna be more intentional. 1671 00:59:32,000 --> 00:59:33,708 And I'm gonna do this, and I'm gonna do that. 1672 00:59:33,833 --> 00:59:35,458 And I want this to work. 1673 00:59:35,583 --> 00:59:38,667 But I feel like after it's acknowledged, 1674 00:59:38,792 --> 00:59:41,292 there's no change. 1675 00:59:41,417 --> 00:59:42,792 - Have y'all had that conversation? 1676 00:59:42,917 --> 00:59:44,292 - No, because I don't have the conversations 1677 00:59:44,417 --> 00:59:45,250 that need to be had. 1678 00:59:45,375 --> 00:59:46,375 Because I'm just very-- 1679 00:59:46,542 --> 00:59:47,750 I don't know. 1680 00:59:47,875 --> 00:59:49,583 I just brush things under the rug. 1681 00:59:49,708 --> 00:59:51,208 And that's something I'm learning about myself-- 1682 00:59:51,333 --> 00:59:52,458 - Mm-hmm. 1683 00:59:52,542 --> 00:59:53,542 - --and trying to grow from. 1684 00:59:53,708 --> 00:59:55,333 - And I do that sometimes, too. 1685 00:59:55,458 --> 00:59:58,000 - Just because I feel like I'm more worried about what 1686 00:59:58,167 --> 00:59:59,125 the answer is gonna be. 1687 00:59:59,208 --> 01:00:00,125 - Mm-hmm. 1688 01:00:00,208 --> 01:00:01,208 - Yeah. 1689 01:00:04,250 --> 01:00:05,667 - You can cry. 1690 01:00:05,792 --> 01:00:07,833 This is a safe space, so please know that. 1691 01:00:07,958 --> 01:00:14,792 ♪ ♪ 1692 01:00:14,875 --> 01:00:16,542 - I think I'm just at a point where 1693 01:00:16,667 --> 01:00:17,500 I'm at my breaking point. 1694 01:00:17,625 --> 01:00:19,167 - Yeah. 1695 01:00:19,292 --> 01:00:21,333 - I understand that, because I know how bad you 1696 01:00:21,417 --> 01:00:22,958 want to be married, you know? 1697 01:00:23,083 --> 01:00:25,333 And I know how bad you want things to work out 1698 01:00:25,458 --> 01:00:27,125 and you want to be a wife. 1699 01:00:27,250 --> 01:00:29,000 So I can understand how difficult this can be for you. 1700 01:00:29,167 --> 01:00:30,917 And I'm sorry. 1701 01:00:31,042 --> 01:00:32,833 - My heart is breaking for Jasmine. 1702 01:00:32,958 --> 01:00:35,167 I mean, she is a wonderful, beautiful person 1703 01:00:35,292 --> 01:00:36,667 inside and out. 1704 01:00:36,833 --> 01:00:40,042 And she went into this with the most open mind, 1705 01:00:40,208 --> 01:00:43,333 wanting to be a wife, ready to be a wife. 1706 01:00:43,417 --> 01:00:45,167 And she is an incredible wife. 1707 01:00:45,250 --> 01:00:46,750 And it just breaks my heart that she's not getting 1708 01:00:46,875 --> 01:00:49,000 what she needs in return. 1709 01:00:49,125 --> 01:00:50,083 ♪ ♪ 1710 01:00:50,208 --> 01:00:52,542 - I'm about to cry again. 1711 01:00:52,667 --> 01:00:58,208 ♪ ♪ 1712 01:00:58,375 --> 01:01:00,500 Emotionally, I just don't know what I have 1713 01:01:00,667 --> 01:01:02,458 left to give at this point. 1714 01:01:02,542 --> 01:01:08,000 ♪ ♪ 1715 01:01:08,083 --> 01:01:10,000 [upbeat music] 1716 01:01:10,125 --> 01:01:12,292 - Next time on "Married at First Sight..." 1717 01:01:12,375 --> 01:01:14,833 - Kirsten and I have consummated our marriage. 1718 01:01:14,958 --> 01:01:16,708 [cheers and applause] 1719 01:01:16,875 --> 01:01:18,458 - With less than two weeks until Decision Day, 1720 01:01:18,542 --> 01:01:20,708 we welcome guest expert DeVon Franklin. 1721 01:01:20,833 --> 01:01:22,000 - How are you doing? DeVon. 1722 01:01:22,167 --> 01:01:23,875 - All right. 1723 01:01:24,042 --> 01:01:26,667 - And sit down with the couples to confront the truth. 1724 01:01:26,792 --> 01:01:28,458 - I appreciate you probably more than you know. 1725 01:01:28,583 --> 01:01:29,500 - I do love you. 1726 01:01:29,583 --> 01:01:31,333 ♪ ♪ 1727 01:01:31,458 --> 01:01:33,250 - Oh. 1728 01:01:33,375 --> 01:01:35,833 - In my relationships, I just brush things under the rug. 1729 01:01:35,958 --> 01:01:37,375 - Whatever we sweep under the emotional rug, 1730 01:01:37,542 --> 01:01:38,333 it doesn't go anywhere. 1731 01:01:38,458 --> 01:01:40,667 ♪ ♪ 1732 01:01:40,792 --> 01:01:42,625 - I want you to be there. I need you to be there. 1733 01:01:42,708 --> 01:01:44,583 It's not a want no more. It's a need. 1734 01:01:44,708 --> 01:01:45,625 - Do you feel supported in the marriage? 1735 01:01:45,708 --> 01:01:46,583 ♪ ♪ 1736 01:01:46,708 --> 01:01:48,792 - No. 1737 01:01:48,917 --> 01:01:51,167 - If this isn't something you're willing to do, 1738 01:01:51,250 --> 01:01:52,667 there's the door. 1739 01:01:52,750 --> 01:01:53,625 ♪ ♪ 1740 01:01:53,750 --> 01:01:55,208 - I'm over it. 1741 01:01:55,333 --> 01:01:56,875 I'm done. 1742 01:01:57,000 --> 01:01:57,667 Literally, I'm trying to dance with you. 1743 01:01:57,792 --> 01:01:59,167 I'm your wife. 1744 01:01:59,292 --> 01:02:00,625 But you don't want to dance with your wife. 1745 01:02:00,750 --> 01:02:03,125 Instead, you want to go dance with the instructor. 1746 01:02:03,250 --> 01:02:06,000 I'm [bleep] done. 1747 01:02:06,167 --> 01:02:08,375 - Do you see a possibility for this marriage? 1748 01:02:08,500 --> 01:02:13,833 ♪ ♪