1
00:00:02,001 --> 00:00:03,937
>> Stand still, a critical
2
00:00:04,003 --> 00:00:05,472
outage at the FAA this morning
has thousands of passengers
3
00:00:05,538 --> 00:00:09,809
stranded.
Airports impacted across the
4
00:00:09,876 --> 00:00:12,812
country.
>> The latest in a series of
5
00:00:12,879 --> 00:00:16,883
wide spread meltdowns that have
repeatedly in recent months left
6
00:00:16,950 --> 00:00:18,785
thousands of passengers
stranded.
7
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:21,121
At one point this morning all
commercial domestic departures
8
00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:36,069
were suspended.
(TO "THE DANGER ZONE)"
9
00:00:36,136 --> 00:01:11,271
were suspended.
(TO "THE DANGER ZONE)"
10
00:01:11,337 --> 00:01:13,740
>> Announcer: IT'S "THE LATE
11
00:01:13,807 --> 00:01:20,814
SHOW WITH STEPHEN COLBERT."
TONIGHT: ALL SYSTEMS NO!
12
00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:25,151
PLUS, STEPHEN WELCOMES JANELLE
MONÁE
13
00:01:25,218 --> 00:01:29,956
AND JAMIE OLIVER.
WITH A SPECIAL APPEARANCES BY M.
14
00:01:30,023 --> 00:01:34,694
NIGHT SHYAMALAN.
FEATURING LOUIS CATO AND THE
15
00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:40,867
LATE SHOW BAND.
AND NOW, LIVE ON TAPE FROM THE
16
00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:49,042
ED SULLIVAN THEATER IN NEW YORK
CITY, IT'S STEPHEN COLBERT!
17
00:01:49,108 --> 00:01:56,382
(APPLAUSE).
♪
18
00:01:56,449 --> 00:02:08,728
>> Stephen: THANK YOU.
(APPLAUSE)
19
00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:12,232
HAPPY WEDNESDAY, HAPPY, HAPPY
WEDNESDAY, HAPPY HAPPY
20
00:02:12,298 --> 00:02:13,166
WEDNESDAY.
HAPPY WEDNESDAY.
21
00:02:13,233 --> 00:02:17,704
THERE YOU GO.
THANKS, EVERYBODY, VERY KIND.
22
00:02:17,770 --> 00:02:21,674
WELCOME ONE AND ALL-- I DON'T
WANT TO GET IN YOUR WAY, GO
23
00:02:21,741 --> 00:02:23,776
AHEAD.
WELCOME ONE AND ALL TO THE LATE
24
00:02:23,843 --> 00:02:27,413
SHOW.
I'M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.
25
00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:33,720
ANYBODY HERE IN THE AUDIENCE
FROM OUT OF TOWN?
26
00:02:33,786 --> 00:02:35,255
(APPLAUSE)
I ASSUME YOU DROVE HERE, BECAUSE
27
00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:38,258
THIS MORNING, AN F.A.A. COMPUTER
GLITCH GROUNDED ALL DEPARTING
28
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:42,529
DOMESTIC FLIGHTS ACROSS THE
COUNTRY.
29
00:02:42,595 --> 00:02:45,832
WELL, THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN
YOU RUN YOUR ENTIRE AVIATION
30
00:02:45,899 --> 00:02:50,703
SYSTEM OFF A BOINGO HOTSPOT.
"IT SAYS I'M CONNECTED BUT I CAN
31
00:02:50,770 --> 00:02:57,510
ONLY GO TO DELTA.COM!"
THE PROBLEMS STARTED LAST NIGHT,
32
00:02:57,577 --> 00:03:02,582
THANKS TO A CRASH OF F.A.A.
SOFTWARE CALLED "NOTAM," WHICH
33
00:03:02,649 --> 00:03:05,184
SHARES INFORMATION ABOUT HAZARDS
IN THE AIR OR ON THE GROUND,
34
00:03:05,251 --> 00:03:09,122
SUCH AS CLOSED RUNWAYS AND
AIRSPACE RESTRICTIONS.
35
00:03:09,188 --> 00:03:12,058
IT'S THE AIR TRAVEL EQUIVALENT
OF THAT TALK WITH YOUR DAD
36
00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:15,228
BEFORE A ROAD TRIP.
"YOU'RE GONNA WANNA SKIP 95 AT
37
00:03:15,295 --> 00:03:19,098
THIS HOUR, BECAUSE THEY CLOSED
THE HARTFORD EXITS.
38
00:03:19,165 --> 00:03:21,301
OKAY, I GOT SOME CD'S FROM
THE LIBRARY-- IT'S AN AUDIOBOOK
39
00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:22,902
ABOUT HITLER'S TOP GENERALS.
JUST MAIL 'EM BACK TO ME WHEN
40
00:03:22,969 --> 00:03:23,870
YOU GET THERE.
AND CALL YOUR MOM -- NOT FROM
41
00:03:23,937 --> 00:03:31,177
THE ROAD!"
APPARENTLY, THE PROBLEM IS THAT
42
00:03:31,244 --> 00:03:36,849
THE NOTAM SYSTEM IS A LITTLE
WHAT IS IT CALLS NOTAL-- NOTAM,
43
00:03:36,916 --> 00:03:39,953
ARE YOU MAKING THAT UP, YOU
DON'T KNOW.
44
00:03:40,019 --> 00:03:41,387
THE NOTAM SYSTEM IS A LITTLE
ANTIQUATED, BECAUSE IT WAS
45
00:03:41,454 --> 00:03:46,759
CREATED IN 1947 AND MODELED
AFTER MESSAGES USED TO ALERT
46
00:03:46,826 --> 00:03:49,662
SHIP CAPTAINS TO HAZARDS AT
SEA.
47
00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:52,599
WHICH EXPLAINS WHY THE MOST
COMMON MESSAGE PILOTS GET IS
48
00:03:52,665 --> 00:04:02,475
"THARRRR SHE BLOWS."
COMES WITH A HARPOON.
49
00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:03,910
(APPLAUSE)
THERE YOU GO.
50
00:04:03,977 --> 00:04:05,745
THANKFULLY, THE SYSTEM IS BACK
UP AND RUNNING, THEY'RE
51
00:04:05,812 --> 00:04:08,948
INVESTIGATING WHAT HAPPENED, AND
GOOD NEWS: THERE IS NO EVIDENCE
52
00:04:09,015 --> 00:04:12,218
OF A CYBERATTACK AT THIS POINT.
OR SO THEY SAY.
53
00:04:12,285 --> 00:04:15,188
BUT THINK ABOUT IT: WHO STANDS
TO GAIN THE "MOST" FROM
54
00:04:15,254 --> 00:04:18,424
TRAVELERS STUCK AT AIRPORTS?
NONE OTHER THAN CRIMINAL
55
00:04:18,491 --> 00:04:29,469
MASTERMINDS: AUNTIE ANNE, DOCTOR
CINNABON AND AU BON PAAAIN!
56
00:04:29,535 --> 00:04:32,739
(APPLAUSE)
BON VOYAGE.
57
00:04:32,805 --> 00:04:36,843
SPEAKING OF LONG DELAYS, THE
REPUBLICAN HOUSE MAJORITY IS UP
58
00:04:36,909 --> 00:04:39,112
AND RUNNING, AND THEY'RE READY
TO ACHIEVE THEIR WILDEST DREAMS.
59
00:04:39,178 --> 00:04:42,482
WHICH APPARENTLY, IS HANGING OUT
WITH FOX NEWS ANCHOR AND LAST
60
00:04:42,548 --> 00:04:48,421
HAM CUBE LEFT AT THE SALAD BAR,
SEAN HANNITY.
61
00:04:48,488 --> 00:04:51,557
HANNITY HAD MEMBERS OF THE
G.O.P. HOUSE ON HIS SHOW LAST
62
00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:54,227
NIGHT, TO TALK ABOUT BLAH BLAH
BLAH WHO CARES.
63
00:04:54,293 --> 00:04:58,965
WHAT'S GETTING THE ATTENTION IS
THIS INTERESTING OBSERVATION:
64
00:04:59,032 --> 00:05:02,735
>> ONE OF THE THINGS I LIKE TO
SEE, AND I'M SEEING, IS MORE
65
00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:05,104
DIVERSITY IN THE REPUBLICAN
PARTY.
66
00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:09,809
>> Stephen: ABSOLUTELY.
JUST LOOK AT THE REPUBLICAN
67
00:05:09,876 --> 00:05:15,748
RAINBOW OF INCLUSION!
THEY'VE GOT IT ALL, THE FULL
68
00:05:15,815 --> 00:05:18,584
SPECTRUM.
THEY GOT, LOOK AT THAT PHOTO.
69
00:05:18,651 --> 00:05:25,124
THEY'VE GOT EGGSHELL, VANILLA,
BANDAID, BANDAID WITH GLASSES.
70
00:05:25,191 --> 00:05:29,429
EVERYTHING.
NO SURPRISE, CONGRESSWOMAN ELISE
71
00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:32,565
STEFANIK AGREED WITH HANNITY.
>> WE HAVE MORE WOMEN THAN EVER
72
00:05:32,632 --> 00:05:35,368
ELECTED BEFORE, MORE HISPANIC
MEMBERS EVER ELECTED BEFORE,
73
00:05:35,435 --> 00:05:37,804
MORE AFRICAN AMERICAN MEMBERS IN
MODERN HISTORY.
74
00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:43,242
>> Stephen: AND THAT'S JUST
GEORGE SANTOS.
75
00:05:43,309 --> 00:05:50,016
(LAUGHTER)
(APPLAUSE)
76
00:05:50,083 --> 00:05:52,585
AND IT GETS MORE.
BECAUSE THE NEW REPUBLICAN
77
00:05:52,652 --> 00:05:57,323
MAJORITY WILL HAVE TWICE AS MANY
MEN NAMED "MIKE" AS THERE ARE
78
00:05:57,390 --> 00:06:04,063
WOMEN CHAIRING COMMITTEES.
THIS IS THE BIGGEST MIKE
79
00:06:04,130 --> 00:06:05,932
OVERLOAD SINCE THAT LOU BEGA
SONG:
80
00:06:05,998 --> 00:06:09,936
>> A LITTLE BIT OF "MIKE" IN THE
SUN, A LITTLE BIT OF "MIKE" ALL
81
00:06:10,002 --> 00:06:14,674
NIGHT LONG, A LITLE BIT OF
"MIKE'S" HERE I AM, A LITTLE BIT
82
00:06:14,741 --> 00:06:25,218
OF YOU MAKES ME YOUR "MIKE."
CAN'T BELIEVE THAT JOKE WORKED.
83
00:06:25,284 --> 00:06:26,719
CANNOT BELIEVE IT I CAN'T
BELIEVE IT.
84
00:06:26,786 --> 00:06:30,490
I OWE YOU AN APOLOGY.
THAT JOKE WORKED.
85
00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:32,892
(LAUGHTER)
(APPLAUSE)
86
00:06:32,959 --> 00:06:37,864
I AM GOING, I DON'T UNDERSTAND
HOW WE GET TO THAT JOKE.
87
00:06:37,930 --> 00:06:40,666
HOW DOES IT WORK.
ONE REPUBLICAN WHO'S POSSIBLY
88
00:06:40,733 --> 00:06:44,070
NOT NAMED MIKE IS INCOMING
G.O.P. CONGRESSMAN AND MAN
89
00:06:44,137 --> 00:06:48,608
PUTTING AIR QUOTES AROUND HIS
ENTIRE LIFE, GEORGE SANTOS.
90
00:06:48,674 --> 00:06:54,447
SANTOS HAS A LONG HISTORY OF
STRETCHING THE TRUTH, BY NEVER
91
00:06:54,514 --> 00:06:57,350
TELLING IT.
WELL NOW, IN A NEW COMPLAINT
92
00:06:57,416 --> 00:07:00,453
FILED WITH THE FEDERAL ELECTION
COMMISSION, SANTOS HAS BEEN
93
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,955
ACCUSED OF EXTENSIVE LIES ABOUT
HIS CAMPAIGN FINANCES.
94
00:07:03,022 --> 00:07:06,159
SO DISAPPOINTING.
I EXPECTED MORE FROM THE MAN WHO
95
00:07:06,225 --> 00:07:12,765
INVENTED THE AUTOMOBILE.
NAMED AFTER HIS DAUGHTER
96
00:07:12,832 --> 00:07:16,135
MERCEDES.
ACCORDING TO THE COMPLAINT,
97
00:07:16,202 --> 00:07:19,138
SANTOS CLAIMS THAT HE LOANED
$705,000 TO HIS OWN CAMPAIGN,
98
00:07:19,205 --> 00:07:24,944
EVEN THOUGH 2020 RECORDS
INDICATE HE ONLY HAD $55,000 TO
99
00:07:25,011 --> 00:07:27,580
HIS NAME.
FAIR ENOUGH, BUT WHAT ABOUT ALL
100
00:07:27,647 --> 00:07:32,018
OF HIS OTHER NAMES?
(LAUGHTER)
101
00:07:32,084 --> 00:07:33,352
(APPLAUSE).
>> Stephen: BECAUSE, BECAUSE,
102
00:07:33,419 --> 00:07:39,358
BECAUSE UP UNTIL HE RAN FOR
CONGRESS, SANTOS USED THE
103
00:07:39,425 --> 00:07:42,094
ALIASES "ANTHONY ZABROVSKY" AND
"ANTHONY DEVOLDER."
104
00:07:42,161 --> 00:07:44,530
HE HAS SO MANY ALIASES HE HAD TO
SWEAR IN ON TWO BIBLES AND A
105
00:07:44,597 --> 00:07:51,537
TORAH.
THE WALLS APPEAR TO BE CLOSING
106
00:07:51,604 --> 00:07:54,473
IN ON OL' GEORGY, BECAUSE THIS
MORNING, REPUBLICAN OFFICIALS ON
107
00:07:54,540 --> 00:07:57,410
LONG ISLAND HELD A PRESS
CONFERENCE AND CALLED ON HIM TO
108
00:07:57,476 --> 00:08:04,450
RESIGN, DROPPING THIS BOMBSHELL:
>> GEORGE SANTOS' CAMPAIGN LAST
109
00:08:04,517 --> 00:08:08,788
YEAR WAS A CAMPAIGN OF DECEIT,
LIES, AND FABRICATION.
110
00:08:08,855 --> 00:08:10,923
TOLD ME, I REMEMBER
SPECIFICALLY, "I'M INTO SPORTS A
111
00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:15,628
LITTLE BIT," THAT HE WAS A STAR
ON THE BARUCH VOLLEYBALL TEAM
112
00:08:15,695 --> 00:08:22,301
AND THAT THEY WON THE LEAGUE
CHAMPIONSHIP.
113
00:08:22,368 --> 00:08:25,738
HE LIED ABOUT GOING TO BARUCH.
>> Stephen: OKAY, THEY SAY HE
114
00:08:25,805 --> 00:08:30,209
LIED ABOUT BEING A VOLLEYBALL
CHAMPION, BUT SANTOS DID PROVIDE
115
00:08:30,276 --> 00:08:32,245
THIS VIDEO EVIDENCE.
>> LET'S GO!
116
00:08:32,311 --> 00:08:36,182
LET'S GO, I'M GEORGE SANTOS!
THIS IS
117
00:08:36,249 --> 00:08:42,255
BARUCH COLLEGE IS TOTALLY GOING
BARUCH COLLEGE.
118
00:08:42,321 --> 00:08:43,589
IN RESPONSE TO THIS STUNNING
REBUKE FROM HIS OWN PARTY,
119
00:08:43,656 --> 00:08:47,093
SANTOS TOLD REPORTERS ON CAPITOL
HILL THAT HE "WILL NOT" RESIGN.
120
00:08:47,159 --> 00:08:55,434
WHICH MEANS: HE'S GONNA RESIGN!
REPUBLICANS AREN'T THE ONLY ONES
121
00:08:55,501 --> 00:08:58,638
WHO WANT TO GET RID OF GEORGE
SANTOS, BECAUSE YESTERDAY TWO
122
00:08:58,704 --> 00:09:01,841
DEMOCRATS REQUESTED A HOUSE
ETHICS INVESTIGATION OF SANTOS,
123
00:09:01,908 --> 00:09:04,243
AND THEY HAND-DELIVERED A COPY
OF THE COMPLAINT TO SANTOS'
124
00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:06,679
OFFICE.
HE WASN'T THERE AT THE TIME.
125
00:09:06,746 --> 00:09:09,181
THEY HAD TO GIVE IT TO HIS
ASSISTANT, ADMIRAL SLORGE
126
00:09:09,248 --> 00:09:15,554
GANTOS.
HE HAS AN ADMIRAL AS AN
127
00:09:15,621 --> 00:09:19,025
ASSISTANT.
THAT'S SURPRISING.
128
00:09:19,091 --> 00:09:23,663
MILITARY, OF THAT RANK.
SPEAKING OF SANTOS' FALSEHOODS,
129
00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:24,764
WE JUST GOT ANOTHER ONE AND IT'S
WILD.
130
00:09:24,830 --> 00:09:26,399
HE CLAIMS, HE WAS ONE OF THE
FIRST PEOPLE IN THE U.S.
131
00:09:26,465 --> 00:09:31,404
DIAGNOSED WITH COVID-19.
SMART THINKING, GEORGY.
132
00:09:31,470 --> 00:09:33,372
(AS SANTOS)
"EVERYONE HATES ME, BUT I KNOW
133
00:09:33,439 --> 00:09:41,847
HOW TO WIN THEM BACK: I'LL TELL
THEM I WAS PATIENT ZERO."
134
00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:48,354
OVER ON THE INTERNET, THIS WEEK,
OHIO AND NEW JERSEY BANNED
135
00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:53,292
TIKTOK ON GOVERNMENT DEVICES
OVER CHINESE SURVEILLANCE FEARS.
136
00:09:53,359 --> 00:09:57,663
- IT'S A VALID CONCERN, BUT I
- - TWO PEOPLE CLAPPING, BUT I
137
00:09:57,730 --> 00:09:59,598
DON'T KNOW IF CHINA IS SUPER
WORRIED ABOUT WHAT OHIO AND NEW
138
00:09:59,665 --> 00:10:00,666
JERSEY ARE UP TO.
(AS SOLDIER)
139
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:02,468
"CHAIRMAN.
WE HAVE THE LATEST REPORT FROM
140
00:10:02,535 --> 00:10:06,405
THE UNITED STATES.
THE ENEMY CONTINUES TO PUT CHILI
141
00:10:06,472 --> 00:10:09,141
ON SPAGHETTI, AND WE ARE
MONITORING THE ACTIVITY OF THE
142
00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:12,545
MAN CALLED 'THE BOSS.'
THEY SAY HE IS BORN TO RUN, BUT
143
00:10:12,611 --> 00:10:25,424
WE WILL CATCH HIM."
TIKTOK IS ESPECIALLY DANGEROUS
144
00:10:25,491 --> 00:10:28,627
FOR GOVERNMENT PHONES BECAUSE OF
CONCERNS THAT THE APP ACCESSES
145
00:10:28,694 --> 00:10:32,798
DATA, TAKES FREQUENT SCREEN
CAPTURES, GATHERS OTHER
146
00:10:32,865 --> 00:10:34,700
SENSITIVE USER INFORMATION LIKE
PASSWORDS, AND COLLECTS
147
00:10:34,767 --> 00:10:38,037
KEYSTROKES OF USERS.
THAT IS DISTURBING.
148
00:10:38,104 --> 00:10:41,040
NO COMPANY SHOULD KNOW THAT MUCH
ABOUT YOU.
149
00:10:41,107 --> 00:10:49,382
OOP, HANG ON. MY APPLE WATCH IS
TELLING ME TO BREATHE.
150
00:10:49,448 --> 00:10:50,883
IT'S NOT JUST OHIO AND NEW
JERSEY.
151
00:10:50,950 --> 00:10:53,819
AT LEAST 20 OTHER STATES HAVE
LEFT TIKTOK OVER GROWING
152
00:10:53,886 --> 00:10:56,022
CONCERNS ABOUT ITS SAFETY.
IT'S TRUE.
153
00:10:56,088 --> 00:10:58,090
TIKTOK IS DANGEROUS.
I GRAB MY PHONE TO CHECK IT
154
00:10:58,157 --> 00:11:03,329
BEFORE BED, THEN AN HOUR LATER
I'M KNEE DEEP IN CLEAN-TOK,
155
00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:04,597
WATCHING SOMEBODY SHAMPOOING A
RUG.
156
00:11:04,663 --> 00:11:06,098
THE RUG WAS SO DIRTY BUT NOW
IT'S SO CLEAN.
157
00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:11,771
CHINA, I LOVE YOU!
HOW DID THEY GET IT SO DIRTY.
158
00:11:11,837 --> 00:11:14,106
I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT WAS A PINK
RUG.
159
00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:17,676
IT WAS A BROWN RUG T SAY PINK
RUG.
160
00:11:17,743 --> 00:11:20,513
THERE SAY BIRD IN THE MIDDLE.
OKAY, NOW WE'RE COOKIN' WITH
161
00:11:20,579 --> 00:11:24,884
GAS!
YOU CAN FEEL IT.
162
00:11:24,950 --> 00:11:26,952
BECAUSE THIS NEXT STORY IS ABOUT
COOKING WITH GAS.
163
00:11:27,019 --> 00:11:28,721
SPECIFICALLY, HOW THAT'S "BAD."
THE E.P.A. HAS FOUND THAT
164
00:11:28,788 --> 00:11:32,491
NATURAL GAS STOVES EMIT AIR
POLLUTANTS SUCH AS NITROGEN
165
00:11:32,558 --> 00:11:34,660
DIOXIDE AND CARBON MONOXIDE,
AND ARE LINKED TO RESPIRATORY
166
00:11:34,727 --> 00:11:39,932
ILLNESS, CARDIOVASCULAR
PROBLEMS, AND OTHER HEALTH
167
00:11:39,999 --> 00:11:42,935
CONDITIONS.
OKAY, THAT IS... NOT GREAT.
168
00:11:43,002 --> 00:11:45,337
BUT COUNTERPOINT: GAS STOVES ARE
ALSO LINKED TO DELICIOUS
169
00:11:45,404 --> 00:11:51,444
PAN-SEARED SCALLOPS.
COME ON, BABY, COME ON.
170
00:11:51,510 --> 00:11:54,447
OH YEAH, OH YEAH.
AS A RESULT, THE GOVERNMENT IS
171
00:11:54,513 --> 00:11:58,584
NOW CONSIDERING BANNING GAS
STOVES.
172
00:11:58,651 --> 00:12:01,454
[BLEEP] YOU.
I WILL SEE YOU IN HELL.
173
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:05,524
YOU CAN HAVE MY GAS RANGE WHEN
YOU PRY IT FROM MY HOT, SIZZLING
174
00:12:05,591 --> 00:12:09,562
HAMS!
NOW BECAUSE THEY KNEW I WOULD BE
175
00:12:09,628 --> 00:12:13,632
UPSET THE GOVERNMENT SAYS THEY
NOW HAVE NO PLANS TO BANG THE
176
00:12:13,699 --> 00:12:19,672
STOVES, SO AS OF RIGHT NOW BUT
TH NERVOUS NELLIES ARE URGING
177
00:12:19,738 --> 00:12:24,176
PEOPLE TO GO ELECTRIC, WHY,
BECAUSE ELECTRIC STOVE OS SO
178
00:12:24,243 --> 00:12:27,680
SAFE, KID, I DON'T WANT YOU
INHALING PARTICLATE MATTER SO I
179
00:12:27,746 --> 00:12:31,016
BROUGHT US SOMETHING THAT GOES
FROM ROOM TEMPERATURE TO THE
180
00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:33,686
SURFACE OF THE SUN WITH NOTHING
IN BETWEEN, AND WHEN YOU TURN IT
181
00:12:33,752 --> 00:12:37,189
OFF IT STAYS HOT FOR HOURS.
IS IT ON RIGHT NOW, ONLY ONE WAY
182
00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:41,760
TO FIND OUT.
JIMMY, PUT A PLATE ON THERE AND
183
00:12:41,827 --> 00:12:45,831
SEE IF IT EXPLODES IN YOUR FACE.
WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOUR
184
00:12:45,898 --> 00:12:50,436
TONIGHT.
OUR GUESTS ARE JANELLE JANELLE
185
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:54,974
MONAE AND JAMIE OLIVER.
AND THEN I TAKE YOU BEHIND THE
186
00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:58,777
SCENES FOR A THRILLING REBOOT OF
THE TONIGHT SHOW WITH M. NIGHT
187
00:12:58,844 --> 00:13:03,682
SHYAMALAN.
STICK AROUND.
188
00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:39,318
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY,
WELCOME BACK.
189
00:13:39,385 --> 00:13:46,859
(APPLAUSE)
GIVE IT UP FOR THE BAND, LOUIS
190
00:13:46,926 --> 00:13:53,299
CATO AND THE LATE SHOW BAND!
HAVE A SEAT, EVERYBODY.
191
00:13:53,365 --> 00:13:58,804
LOUIS, TONIGHT WE GOT JUST A
FANTASTIC MUSICIAN, ARTIST,
192
00:13:58,871 --> 00:14:02,575
ACTRESS, JANELLE MONAE IS ON
THIS EVENING.
193
00:14:02,641 --> 00:14:04,944
(APPLAUSE)
TAR OF THE GLASS ONION.
194
00:14:05,010 --> 00:14:07,146
HAVE YOU SEEN IT.
>> I HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE YET.
195
00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:09,915
>> Stephen: SHE IS FANTASTIC
IN THAT.
196
00:14:09,982 --> 00:14:12,351
AND JAMIE OLIVER WILL BE OUT
HERE LATER.
197
00:14:12,418 --> 00:14:14,987
WE'RE GOING TO COOK A STEAK.
WE'RE GOING TO COOK A STEAK.
198
00:14:15,054 --> 00:14:17,556
FOR EXAMPLES,
>> Stephen: I LOVE MOVIES.
199
00:14:17,623 --> 00:14:20,392
WITHOUT THEM, IT'D FEEL WEIRD TO
THEATER SEATS WITH SCREEN SIT
200
00:14:20,459 --> 00:14:21,760
DOWN IN A DARK ROOM AND EAT
POPCORN FOR TWO HOURS.
201
00:14:21,827 --> 00:14:23,028
AND ONE FILMMAKER THAT'S ALWAYS
INTRIGUED ME IS M.NIGHT
202
00:14:23,095 --> 00:14:28,767
SHYAMALAN.
HE HAS A KNACK FOR REINVENTING
203
00:14:28,834 --> 00:14:31,503
CINEMATIC GENRES.
"THE SIXTH SENSE" WAS A MODERN
204
00:14:31,570 --> 00:14:33,839
GHOST STORY.
"UNBREAKABLE" WAS AN ORIGINAL
205
00:14:33,906 --> 00:14:37,042
SPIN ON A SUPERHERO MOVIE.
AND "OLD" WAS A FRESH TAKE ON
206
00:14:37,109 --> 00:14:45,884
THE CLASSIC MOVIE TROPE OF A
MAGIC BEACH THAT TURNS YOU OLD.
207
00:14:45,951 --> 00:14:47,453
AND IT GOT ME THINKING: AWHILE
BACK, WE HAD ZACK SNYDER, THE
208
00:14:47,519 --> 00:14:48,687
DIRECTOR OF "JUSTICE LEAGUE,"
"300," AND "ARMY OF THE DEAD,"
209
00:14:48,754 --> 00:14:53,626
STOP BY TO MAKE A GRITTY,
ACTION-PACKED EPISODE OF THE
210
00:14:53,692 --> 00:14:57,296
LATE SHOW.
SO WHAT IF M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN
211
00:14:57,363 --> 00:14:59,965
COULD BRING HIS SINGULAR VISION
TO THE LATE SHOW BY GUEST
212
00:15:00,032 --> 00:15:03,302
DIRECTING AN EPISODE?
WELL I ASKED: AND THE MASTER OF
213
00:15:03,369 --> 00:15:11,610
MYSTERY SAID, "YES".
... OR DID HE?
214
00:15:11,677 --> 00:15:15,648
HE DID.
AND SO TONIGHT, I'M EXCITED TO
215
00:15:15,714 --> 00:15:19,018
PRESENT TO YOU AN EXCLUSIVE
BEHIND-THE-SCENES SNEAK PEAK AT
216
00:15:19,084 --> 00:15:32,798
M. NIGHT SHYMALAN'S "THE LATE
SHOW."
217
00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:34,933
>> I WAS VERY EXCITED BY THE
CHALLENGE OF DIRECTING "THE LATE
218
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:36,902
SHOW."
BECAUSE, LET'S FACE IT, THAT
219
00:15:36,969 --> 00:15:40,205
SHOW'S NOT VERY SCARY.
>> Stephen: WE WERE "SO" EXCITED
220
00:15:40,272 --> 00:15:42,374
TO HAVE M. NIGHT ON BOARD.
HIS NAME IS SYNONYMOUS WITH
221
00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:45,411
CINEMA.
LITERALLY, DID YOU KNOW THE "M"
222
00:15:45,477 --> 00:15:49,748
IN "M. NIGHT" STANDS FOR MOVIE?
>> IT'S ACTUALLY "MANOJ," BUT HE
223
00:15:49,815 --> 00:15:51,517
WAS SO EXCITED ABOUT A DIRECTOR
BEING NAMED "MOVIE," I DIDN'T
224
00:15:51,583 --> 00:15:54,353
HAVE THE HEART TO TELL HIM.
>> Stephen: MOVIE NIGHT AND I
225
00:15:54,420 --> 00:15:56,555
AGREED THAT HE WOULD HAVE TOTAL
CONTROL.
226
00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:58,857
>> I WANTED TO INFUSE EVERYTHING
WITH MY SPECIAL BRAND OF
227
00:15:58,924 --> 00:16:02,528
SHYAMALAN EERINESS.
IT'S WHAT FILM HISTORIANS CALL
228
00:16:02,594 --> 00:16:05,064
"SHYAMALANIFICATION."
SERIOUSLY, LOOK IT UP IN A
229
00:16:05,130 --> 00:16:07,099
DICTIONARY.
>> Stephen: I DID LOOK IT UP.
230
00:16:07,166 --> 00:16:14,440
IT'S NOT IN THERE.
THANK YOU LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
231
00:16:14,506 --> 00:16:18,344
PLEASE HAVE A SEAT.
WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW."
232
00:16:18,410 --> 00:16:21,213
I'M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.
>> NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
233
00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:23,282
>> Stephen: NO BUT THAT'S WHAT I
SAY AT THE START OF EVERY SHOW.
234
00:16:23,349 --> 00:16:25,918
>> NO, THE LINE WAS FINE, BUT
DON'T JUST COME RIGHT OUT AND
235
00:16:25,984 --> 00:16:28,520
SAY IT.
DON'T TELL THEM WHO YOU ARE.
236
00:16:28,587 --> 00:16:31,523
YOU'RE BLOWING THE REVEAL.
>> Stephen: OH, OKAY.
237
00:16:31,590 --> 00:16:34,827
>> TRY IT AGAIN AND ADD A LITTLE
SUSPENSE.
238
00:16:34,893 --> 00:16:47,673
>> Stephen: ALL RIGHT.
WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW."
239
00:16:47,740 --> 00:16:56,048
I'M STEEEE-PHEN COOOOL-BERT.
>> CUT.
240
00:16:56,115 --> 00:17:04,823
THAT'S A WRAP.
EXCELLENT.
241
00:17:04,890 --> 00:17:06,191
>> MY APPLE TV+ SHOW "SERVANT"
IS A TENSE PSYCHOLOGICAL
242
00:17:06,258 --> 00:17:11,563
THRILLER.
>> AND TO BRING THAT SAME SENSE
243
00:17:11,630 --> 00:17:15,701
OF FEAR TO THE LATE SHOW, I
NEEDED TO FIND OUT WHAT MY
244
00:17:15,768 --> 00:17:16,969
PROTAGONIST, STEPHEN COLBERT, IS
SCARED OF.
245
00:17:17,035 --> 00:17:22,107
>> Stephen: CLOWNS... SPIDERS.
SAYING THEWRONG NAME TO A
246
00:17:22,174 --> 00:17:26,145
PERSON I'VE MET SEVERAL TIMES.
ALSO: ENCLOSED SPACES, OPEN
247
00:17:26,211 --> 00:17:29,314
SPACES, LOSING MY GLASSES, TALL
GUYS WITH TINY HEADS, SHORT
248
00:17:29,381 --> 00:17:32,885
WOMEN WITH LARGE MOUTHS...
>> WE HAD A LOT TO WORK WITH.
249
00:17:32,951 --> 00:17:34,686
>> Stephen: ...BOWLING SHOES,
BOWLING BALLS, THE PINS I'M OKAY
250
00:17:34,753 --> 00:17:37,189
WITH.
REGULAR, NOT DUCK PIN.
251
00:17:37,256 --> 00:17:40,159
>> MAYBE TOO MUCH.
>> Stephen: OH!
252
00:17:40,225 --> 00:17:41,860
AND YOU KNOW THOSE OLD-TIMEY
TABLES THAT HAVE LIKE CARVED
253
00:17:41,927 --> 00:17:43,562
ANIMAL LEGS ON THE BOTTOM?
WHEN IM NOT AROUND, DO THEY
254
00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:47,199
MOVE?
>> IN STORYTELLING, IT'S ALL
255
00:17:47,266 --> 00:17:50,436
ABOUT THE ELEMENT OF SURPRISE.
IN MY FILM "SIGNS," YOU DON'T
256
00:17:50,502 --> 00:17:53,439
SEE THE ALIENS UNTIL TWO THIRDS
OF THE WAY THROUGH THE MOVIE.
257
00:17:53,505 --> 00:18:04,917
THEN 'THIS' HAPPENS--
>> IT'S BEHIND!
258
00:18:04,983 --> 00:18:08,520
>> SPOOKY!
SIDE NOTE: IT WAS SUCH AN HONOR
259
00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:13,258
TO WORK WITH DANIEL DAY LEWIS.
THERE TRULY ARE NO SMALL PARTS.
260
00:18:13,325 --> 00:18:16,995
ANYWAY, I WANTED "THE LATE SHOW"
TO HAVE THAT SENSE OF SURPRISE.
261
00:18:17,062 --> 00:18:19,398
SO I ADDED A LITTLE SOMETHING
WITHOUT TELLING STEPHEN.
262
00:18:19,465 --> 00:18:22,034
>> Stephen: MEANWHILE FROM OUR
FRIENDS AT TACO BELL, THEY'VE
263
00:18:22,100 --> 00:18:26,338
ANNOUNCED A BRAND-NEW INGREDIENT
THAT THEY HAVE NEVER BEFORE
264
00:18:26,405 --> 00:18:27,372
INCLUDED IN-- WHAT THE HELL IS
THAT?
265
00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:31,777
OH MY GOD.
NO!
266
00:18:31,844 --> 00:18:36,482
DIE YOU ALIEN SPACE SCUM, YOU
WILL NOT TAKE MY PLANET!
267
00:18:36,548 --> 00:18:43,121
GO GET YOUR (/ BLEEP/ ) SHINE B.
MY BRAIN!
268
00:18:43,188 --> 00:18:46,158
(/ BLEEP/ ) YOU SPACE BOY!
>> Stephen: HE'S A MASTERFUL
269
00:18:46,225 --> 00:18:48,594
DIRECTOR.
I WAS COMPLETELY SURPRISED.
270
00:18:48,660 --> 00:18:51,230
>> YEAH, I WAS ALSO SURPRISED.
SURPRISED HE THOUGHT I WAS A
271
00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:53,165
REAL ALIEN.
SURPRISED NO ONE STOPPED HIM
272
00:18:53,232 --> 00:18:54,299
FROM BEATING THE CRAP OUT OF
ME.
273
00:18:54,366 --> 00:18:58,504
VERY SURPRISED.
>> MY FANS KNOW THAT I'LL OFTEN
274
00:18:58,570 --> 00:19:02,207
MAKE A CAMEO OR PLAY A SMALL
ROLE IN EACH OF MY FILMS.
275
00:19:02,274 --> 00:19:04,276
IT'S REALLY JUST A LITTLE EASTER
EGG FOR FANS.
276
00:19:04,343 --> 00:19:08,614
VERY SUBTLE.
>> Stephen: DOGS ARE SO STUPID.
277
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:10,382
WHAT A POINTLESS GAME.
TALK TO ME WHEN THEY CAN TAP ON
278
00:19:10,449 --> 00:19:21,360
THREE SIMILAR CANDIES.
>> BLINK AND YOU'LL MISS IT.
279
00:19:21,426 --> 00:19:23,862
>> Stephen: THEN IT WAS TIME FOR
THE END OF THE EPISODE.
280
00:19:23,929 --> 00:19:29,201
AND WE ALL KNOW "BIG M" IS KNOWN
FOR HIS SURPRISE TWIST ENDINGS.
281
00:19:29,268 --> 00:19:32,337
NIGHT,NIGHT, I HAVE THE ENDING.
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
282
00:19:32,404 --> 00:19:35,007
THE END WE REVEAL THAT I'M
LUKE'S FATHER?
283
00:19:35,073 --> 00:19:36,975
>> THAT'S "STAR WARS."
>> Stephen: THEN HOW ABOUT I WAS
284
00:19:37,042 --> 00:19:38,410
TYLER DURDEN ALL ALONG?
>> "FIGHT CLUB."
285
00:19:38,477 --> 00:19:43,248
>> Stephen: WHAT IF I ACCEPT MY
TITLE AS PRINCESS OF GENOVIA.
286
00:19:43,315 --> 00:19:45,050
>> THAT'S "PRINCESS DIARIES" AND
IT DOESN'T EVEN HAVE A TWIST.
287
00:19:45,117 --> 00:19:48,120
>> Stephen: RIGHT, OKAY, HOW
ABOUT I'M THE CARETAKER OF A
288
00:19:48,186 --> 00:19:49,621
SNOWED IN HAUNTED HOTEL.
>> IN THE END I CAME UP WITH THE
289
00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:55,694
GREATEST M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN
TWIST ENDING OF ALL TIME.
290
00:19:55,761 --> 00:19:57,563
>> Stephen: THAT'S IT FOR "THE
LATE SHOW."
291
00:19:57,629 --> 00:20:06,672
STICK AROUND FOR JAMES CORDEN.
GOOD NIGHT!
292
00:20:06,738 --> 00:20:10,208
THAT'S IT FOR "THE LATE SHOW."
STICK AROUND FOR JAMES CORDEN...
293
00:20:10,275 --> 00:20:11,843
THAT'S IT FOR "THE LATE SHOW."
STICK AROUND FOR JAMES CORDEN...
294
00:20:11,910 --> 00:20:14,012
THAT'S IT FOR "THE LATE SHOW."
STICK AROUND FOR JAMES CORDEN...
295
00:20:14,079 --> 00:20:16,782
>> TIME FOR YOUR PILLS, MR.
COLBERT.
296
00:20:16,848 --> 00:20:18,884
>> Stephen: I HOST "THE LATE
SHOW."
297
00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:21,787
>> THIS WHOLE THING HAS BEEN A
HALLUCINATION IN THE MIND OF A
298
00:20:21,853 --> 00:20:26,959
DERANGED NARCISSIST.
>> Stephen: "LATE SHOW."
299
00:20:27,025 --> 00:20:29,361
>> SOMETIMES KNOWN AS CRAZY
MOTHER (/ BLEEP/ ).
300
00:20:29,428 --> 00:20:41,340
THANK YOU TO SAMUEL L. JACKSON
AND M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN!
301
00:20:41,406 --> 00:20:44,309
THE FINAL SEASON OF "SERVANT"
PREMIERS FRIDAY ON APPLE TV+ AND
302
00:20:44,376 --> 00:20:47,346
HIS NEW MOVIE "KNOCK AT THE
CABIN" IS IN THEATERS FEBRUARY
303
00:20:47,412 --> 00:20:50,482
3rd.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH STAR OF
304
00:20:50,549 --> 00:20:57,155
"GLASS ONION," JANELLE MONAÁE.
IS
305
00:20:57,222 --> 00:21:00,192
(APPLAUSE)
(APPLAUSE)
306
00:21:12,638 --> 00:21:13,772
(APPLAUSE).
>> Stephen: THERE YOU GO.
307
00:21:13,839 --> 00:21:21,880
>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK.
MY FIRST GUEST TONIGHT IS GRAMMY
308
00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:29,621
NOMINATED MUSICIAN, AUTHOR,
ACTOR AND FASHION ICON.
309
00:21:29,688 --> 00:21:33,692
SHE NOW STARS IN "GLASS ONION: A
KNIVES OUT MYSTERY."
310
00:21:33,759 --> 00:21:37,763
MY LIFE WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM ME,
BY SOMEONE, BY EVERYONE IN THIS
311
00:21:37,829 --> 00:21:39,197
ROOM.
MY LIFE.
312
00:21:39,264 --> 00:21:41,700
DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT
MEANS?
313
00:21:41,767 --> 00:21:44,036
HUH?
>> WHAT CLAIRE IS TRYING TO SAY
314
00:21:44,102 --> 00:21:47,239
IS WE'RE SORRY.
WE FEEL BAD FOR YOU.
315
00:21:47,305 --> 00:21:50,142
WHAT GOW WANT?
>> ARE YOU REALLY ASKING ME
316
00:21:50,208 --> 00:21:51,543
THAT?
>> YES, WHAT DO YOU WANT?
317
00:21:51,610 --> 00:21:56,081
A CHECK, DO YOU WANT-- JUST TELL
US THE RIGHT WORDS THAT WE CAN
318
00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:58,483
USE SO THAT WE CAN GET ON WITH
OUR LIVES.
319
00:21:58,550 --> 00:22:02,521
YOU WANT REVENGE.
YOU WANT TO SLIT MILE'S THROAT.
320
00:22:02,587 --> 00:22:06,191
YOU WANT TO TAKE US ALL DOWN.
WHAT, JUST DROP THE BOMBSHELL,
321
00:22:06,258 --> 00:22:07,926
SAY IT.
SAY IT!
322
00:22:07,993 --> 00:22:17,169
>> I WANT THE TRUTH.
I WANT THE TRUTH.
323
00:22:17,235 --> 00:22:18,737
>> Stephen: PLEASE WELCOME BACK
TO "THE LATE SHOW," JANELLE
324
00:22:18,804 --> 00:22:33,685
MONAÁE!
325
00:22:33,752 --> 00:22:37,689
MONAÁE!
326
00:22:37,756 --> 00:22:43,061
>> Stephen: WHOOO!
>> HELL HELLO.
327
00:22:43,128 --> 00:22:46,164
>> Stephen: NICE TO SEE YOU.
>> WOW, WHAT AN HONOR IT IS TO
328
00:22:46,231 --> 00:22:48,133
SEE NEW PERSON.
>> Stephen: OH MY GOSH WHAT A
329
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,634
PLEASURE.
THE FIRST TIME YOU HAVE BEEN ON
330
00:22:49,701 --> 00:22:55,807
THE SHOW, THE LAST TIME-- WHICH
IS NICE, BUT NOT LIKE THE
331
00:22:55,874 --> 00:23:00,979
MICRONUDE RECENT YOU CAN
EXCHANGE WHEN ARE YOU IN PERSON.
332
00:23:01,046 --> 00:23:06,952
>> YES T IS COLD IN HERE.
STEPHEN, I HAVE TO COMPLAIN.
333
00:23:07,018 --> 00:23:08,153
I'M COLD.
>> Stephen: I WISH I HAD YOUR
334
00:23:08,220 --> 00:23:11,790
HAT RIGHT NOW.
I COULD USE A LITTLE TOASTINESS.
335
00:23:11,857 --> 00:23:13,992
>> I NEED A BLANKET.
>> Stephen: I THINK HAVE I
336
00:23:14,059 --> 00:23:16,828
ONE.
>> PLEASE, PLEASE.
337
00:23:16,895 --> 00:23:17,763
>> Stephen: WOULD YOU LIKE A
WRAP?
338
00:23:17,829 --> 00:23:21,032
I HAVE ONE.
>> PLEASE EASE GIVE ME A NICE
339
00:23:21,099 --> 00:23:23,435
WRAP, RIGHT THERE MY HAIR STYLE
IS GOING TO KILL YOU.
340
00:23:23,502 --> 00:23:26,371
BUT I WILL KEEP THIS ON.
IT ACTUALLY LOOKS KIND OF COOL.
341
00:23:26,438 --> 00:23:30,776
I'M NOT MAD.
>> Stephen: THAT HAS BEEN BACK
342
00:23:30,842 --> 00:23:33,011
HERE FOR YEARS NO GUEST HAS EVER
ASKED FOR IT.
343
00:23:33,078 --> 00:23:35,547
>> ARE YOU THE ULTIMATE HOST.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU SO MUCH.
344
00:23:35,614 --> 00:23:39,151
SO LISTEN, NOW THAT YOUR PEOPLE
ARE GETTING BACK TOGETHER, A
345
00:23:39,217 --> 00:23:41,386
YEAR AND A HALF NOWRKS ALL KIND
OF HAVE BEEN OUT.
346
00:23:41,453 --> 00:23:46,491
HOW HAS REENTRY BEEN FOR YOU,
HAVE YOU ENJOYED.
347
00:23:46,558 --> 00:23:51,096
>> YOU KNOW, I WILL SAY, I-- I
WAS A LITTLE AWKWARD.
348
00:23:51,163 --> 00:23:53,765
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU.
BUT I HAD A LITTLE ANXIETY, I
349
00:23:53,832 --> 00:23:58,170
WAS QUIET, I WAS LIKE OH GOD.
LET ME JUST SAY OKAY, LISTEN, I
350
00:23:58,236 --> 00:24:01,973
KNOW WE ARE IN THIS MEETING, BUT
I'M AWKWARD, DON'T STARE AT ME
351
00:24:02,040 --> 00:24:03,842
TOO LONG.
I HAVEN'T BEEN AROUND PEOPLE.
352
00:24:03,909 --> 00:24:07,312
EVEN WHEN WE WERE SHOOTING THE
FILM, I HAD TO TELL PEOPLE, I'M
353
00:24:07,379 --> 00:24:10,248
JUST REINTEGRATING SSES THERE
ARE TIMES WHEN I WOULD LIKE TO
354
00:24:10,315 --> 00:24:11,750
PUT MYSELF ON MUTE.
>> SAME.
355
00:24:11,817 --> 00:24:14,286
>> Stephen: JUST TURN OFF MY
CAMERA.
356
00:24:14,352 --> 00:24:15,954
I WILL BE IN A MEETING WITH YOU.
I LIKE THE FEELING THAT I COULD
357
00:24:16,021 --> 00:24:18,957
JUST DISAPPEAR.
ESPECIALLY IF I HAD TO GO TO THE
358
00:24:19,024 --> 00:24:22,694
BATHROOM, PEOPLE WOULDN'T KNOW I
LEFT THE MEETING.
359
00:24:22,761 --> 00:24:25,063
>> AND I LOVE YOU CAN PUT IT AT
THE TOP AND PUT YOUR MUTE GOWN
360
00:24:25,130 --> 00:24:28,333
HERE AND NOBODY WOULD KNOW.
>> Stephen: COMPLETELY KNUDSON
361
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:31,670
THE FURTHER THAT I WENT.
>> YOU KNOW.
362
00:24:31,736 --> 00:24:34,873
>> Stephen: I RESPECT THAT, IS
WHAT I AM SAYING.
363
00:24:34,940 --> 00:24:39,945
SO YOU RECENTLY WENT TO A
SPECIAL CONCERT LAST YEAR, AND
364
00:24:40,011 --> 00:24:42,714
ONE OF YOUR IDOLS, HERE IS A
GREAT PHOTO.
365
00:24:42,781 --> 00:24:46,251
THIS SU, HAVING FUN.
AND THAT UP THERE IS GRACE
366
00:24:46,318 --> 00:24:51,122
JONES.
>> THE ICONIC, LEGENDARY GRACE
367
00:24:51,189 --> 00:24:51,990
JONES.
>> Stephen: WHAT DOES SHE MEAN
368
00:24:52,057 --> 00:24:58,930
TO YOU?
>> OH MAN, SHE IS THE ORIGINAL
369
00:24:58,997 --> 00:25:03,134
FREE ASS [BLEEP].
I MEAN WHAT MORE YOU CAN SAY.
370
00:25:03,201 --> 00:25:06,771
THIS IS AN ENERGY, YOU KNOW,
THAT PEOPLE CAN'T CONTAIN.
371
00:25:06,838 --> 00:25:10,842
>> Stephen: AND THIS HAS LEAD
TO A BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP AT THE
372
00:25:10,909 --> 00:25:15,480
U.K. PREMIER OF GLASS ONION.
SHE WAS THERE.
373
00:25:15,547 --> 00:25:20,685
>> SHE WAS, SHE WAS.
WE HUNG OUT IN L.A. FOR 72
374
00:25:20,752 --> 00:25:22,554
HOURS.
AND WHEN I TELL YOU HANGING OUT
375
00:25:22,621 --> 00:25:26,858
WITH GRACE JOANS FOR 72 HOURS, I
NEEDED A WEEK'S WORTH OF SLEEP.
376
00:25:26,925 --> 00:25:28,760
SHE CAN GO.
>> Stephen: LIKE 72 HOURS
377
00:25:28,827 --> 00:25:31,696
STRAIGHT.
>> EVERY DAY CONSECUTIVELY, SHE
378
00:25:31,763 --> 00:25:34,933
CAME TO MY HOUSE, CAME TO HER
HOTEL, WE SWAM TOGETHER.
379
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:38,637
IT WAS JUST LIKE INSTANTLY WE
CONNECTED AND THEN I INVITED HER
380
00:25:38,703 --> 00:25:40,472
TO THE PREMIER IN LONDON BECAUSE
SHE LIVED THERE.
381
00:25:40,538 --> 00:25:43,241
I DIDN'T THINK SHE WOULD KOVMENT
I THOUGHT SHE WOULD STOT ALLLY
382
00:25:43,308 --> 00:25:47,012
STOOD ME UP.
AN SHE CAME AND STOOD BY MY SIDE
383
00:25:47,078 --> 00:25:49,347
AND TOOK MY HAND AND SAID I'M
PROUD OF YOU.
384
00:25:49,414 --> 00:25:53,852
I'M PROUD OF YOU.
I WAS SOBBING.
385
00:25:53,919 --> 00:25:57,222
>> Stephen: WHO WOULD STAND UP
JANELLE MONAE WHO WOULD STAWN
386
00:25:57,289 --> 00:26:00,191
UP.
>> YOU KNOW, A FOOLISH PERSON.
387
00:26:00,258 --> 00:26:02,227
A FOOL.
>> Stephen: OKAY, LET'S TALK
388
00:26:02,294 --> 00:26:04,429
ABOUT GLASS ONION.
>> OKAY.
389
00:26:04,496 --> 00:26:06,264
>> Stephen: THE KNIVES OUT
SEQUEL.
390
00:26:06,331 --> 00:26:09,301
IT IS FANTASTIC.
ARE YOU GREAT IN IT AND SPOILER
391
00:26:09,367 --> 00:26:16,841
ALERT, IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT
YET, PAUSE.
392
00:26:16,908 --> 00:26:21,379
>> PAUSE, MUTE, COVER YOUR EARS.
>> Stephen: YOU WERE GREAT, IN
393
00:26:21,446 --> 00:26:23,248
TWO DIFFERENT PARTS.
>> OH MY GOSH, YES.
394
00:26:23,315 --> 00:26:27,485
>> Stephen: HOW DID YOU KEEP
TRACK OF WHO YOU WERE PLAYING
395
00:26:27,552 --> 00:26:30,555
WHEN YOU WERE PLAYING THEM
BECAUSE NOT ONLY ARE YOU PLAYING
396
00:26:30,622 --> 00:26:34,025
TWO PEOPLE, ONE OF THE PEOPLE
YOU ARE PLAYING IS PLAYING THE
397
00:26:34,092 --> 00:26:38,396
OTHER PERSON YOU ARE PLAYING.
>> YES, YES.
398
00:26:38,463 --> 00:26:40,865
>> Stephen: YOU ARE DOING AN
IMPRESSION OF YOURSELF ACTING.
399
00:26:40,932 --> 00:26:41,900
>> YES.
>> Stephen: SO HOW DID YOU
400
00:26:41,967 --> 00:26:45,303
KEEP THOSE SEPARATE.
>> SO TO EXPLAIN T I PLAYED
401
00:26:45,370 --> 00:26:49,040
HILLENBRAND WHO WAS THE TWIN
SISTER OF ANDY BRAND.
402
00:26:49,107 --> 00:26:53,912
I ALSO PLAY ITS ANDY AND
HILLENBRAND PRETEND TO BEING
403
00:26:53,979 --> 00:26:57,782
ANDY BEFORE THE AUDIENCE KNOWS
AND PLAYED HELEN BRANT
404
00:26:57,849 --> 00:27:00,018
PRETENDING TO BE ANDY AFTER YOU
FIND OUT, AFTER YOU FIND OUT WHO
405
00:27:00,085 --> 00:27:03,588
SHE IS.
AND SO ESSENTIALLY LIKE FOUR
406
00:27:03,655 --> 00:27:06,925
DIFFERENT CHARACTERS AND I KECHT
NOTEBOOKS, DIFFERENT NOTEBOOKS
407
00:27:06,992 --> 00:27:10,462
WITH ALL OF HELEN'S LINES AND
ANDY'S LINES.
408
00:27:10,528 --> 00:27:13,865
I WOULD WALK IN ON A MONDAY AND
FROM 9:00 IN THE MORNING TO NOON
409
00:27:13,932 --> 00:27:17,369
I WAS ANDY.
FROM 1 TO 4 I COULD HAVE BEEN
410
00:27:17,435 --> 00:27:19,938
HELEN PRETENDING TO BE ANDY AND
ANDY LATER ON INTO THE MIDDLE OF
411
00:27:20,005 --> 00:27:23,408
THE NIGHT.
IT WAS-- IT TOOK GREAT PRECISION
412
00:27:23,475 --> 00:27:25,810
BUT SUPER FUN, CHALLENGING BUT
JUST SO FUN.
413
00:27:25,877 --> 00:27:29,714
>> Stephen: NOW GLASS ONION IS
THE NAME OF THE MOVIE AND IT
414
00:27:29,781 --> 00:27:34,386
REFERS TO THE LAYERS OF MYSTERY,
THE LAYERS OF CHARACTERS, THE
415
00:27:34,452 --> 00:27:37,188
LAYERS OF THE STORY.
BUT JUST ON THE VEGETABLE
416
00:27:37,255 --> 00:27:42,027
ITSELF, AND VERY FEW
GUEST-- GUESTS IN THIS
417
00:27:42,093 --> 00:27:44,963
INTERVIEW, YOU HAVE A HOT TAKE
ON THE VEGETABLE ONION.
418
00:27:45,030 --> 00:27:47,399
>> YEAH, IT NEEDS TO BE IN
PRISON.
419
00:27:47,465 --> 00:27:49,167
I DON'T LIKE ONIONS.
>> Stephen: YOU DON'T LIKE
420
00:27:49,234 --> 00:27:51,236
ONION AT ALL.
CUZ I AGREE, ALMOST ANY AMOUNT
421
00:27:51,302 --> 00:27:55,206
OF RAW ONION IS TOO MUCH BUT NO
AMOUNT OF CARMELIZED ONION IS
422
00:27:55,273 --> 00:27:57,208
TOO MUCH.
>> NO, DON'T LOVE.
423
00:27:57,275 --> 00:27:59,177
>> Stephen: WHERE DID THIS
COME FROM.
424
00:27:59,244 --> 00:28:01,980
A BAD EXPERIENCE.
>> MY COUSIN, AND I HOPE THAT
425
00:28:02,047 --> 00:28:04,215
YOU ARE WATCHING.
WHEN WE WERE LITTLE, WHEN WE
426
00:28:04,282 --> 00:28:09,654
WERE LIKE IN MIDDLE SCHOOL,
MAYBE ELEMENTARY SCHOOL, I USED
427
00:28:09,721 --> 00:28:14,826
TO EAT APPLES, MY MOM WOULD TAKE
THE SKIN OFF, AND I BIT INTO
428
00:28:14,893 --> 00:28:23,334
WHAT I THOUGHT, THEY TOLD ME WAS
A APPLE AND IT WAS A RAW ONION.
429
00:28:23,401 --> 00:28:26,504
I WENT INTO THE BATHROOM, PUT
SOAP IN MY MOUTH, I HAD TO GET
430
00:28:26,571 --> 00:28:28,807
THIS TASTE OUT OF MY MOUTH, IT
WOULDN'T LEAVE FOR THREE DAYS.
431
00:28:28,873 --> 00:28:30,909
>> Stephen: YOUR COUSIN DID
THIS TO YOU.
432
00:28:30,975 --> 00:28:32,577
>> HOW EVIL.
>> Stephen: WHAT?
433
00:28:32,644 --> 00:28:34,813
>> HOW EVIL.
>> Stephen: YES, DID YOU EVER
434
00:28:34,879 --> 00:28:36,648
GET HER BACK.
>> I SHOULD.
435
00:28:36,714 --> 00:28:39,584
I SHOULD.
>> Stephen: REVENGE IS BEST
436
00:28:39,651 --> 00:28:41,719
SERVED WITH RAW ONION.
>> OH GOD.
437
00:28:41,786 --> 00:28:44,889
BUT YOU KNOW, I HEAR THAT ONIONS
ARE GOOD FOR YOU.
438
00:28:44,956 --> 00:28:47,792
AND I REMEMBER WHEN I FOUND OUT
THE NAME OF THE FILM I THOUGHT
439
00:28:47,859 --> 00:28:50,795
OH GOD, LIKE UNDER MY BREATHE.
>> Stephen: EVEN THE NAME
440
00:28:50,862 --> 00:28:53,231
BOTHERS YOU.
>> BUT I WAS LIKE I WILL NOT
441
00:28:53,298 --> 00:28:55,900
TELL RYAN, OUR WRITER DIRECTER,
WHO I ADORE.
442
00:28:55,967 --> 00:28:59,504
AND IT SAY GREAT NAME IT ALSO
HAS SOME TIES TO THE BEATLES
443
00:28:59,571 --> 00:29:00,672
SONG.
>> Stephen: AND YOUR CHARACTER
444
00:29:00,738 --> 00:29:03,174
IN A WAY IS A GLASS ONION, A
CHARACTER INSIDE A CHARACTER
445
00:29:03,241 --> 00:29:05,710
INSIDE A CHARACTER.
>> LAYERS UPON LAYERS UPON
446
00:29:05,777 --> 00:29:06,911
LAYERS.
>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A
447
00:29:06,978 --> 00:29:10,849
QUICK BREAK BUT WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK WITH MORE JANELLE MONAE,
448
00:29:10,915 --> 00:29:12,250
EVERYBODY.
STICK AROUND.
449
00:29:12,317 --> 00:29:14,652
(APPLAUSE).
♪
450
00:29:22,961 --> 00:29:24,863
(APPLAUSE).
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY,
451
00:29:24,929 --> 00:29:26,030
LOOK WHO WE ARE WITH.
ONE OF THE STARS OF GLASS ONION,
452
00:29:26,097 --> 00:29:30,368
A KNIVES OUT MYSTERY, JANELLE
MONAE, JANELLE MONAE, YOU
453
00:29:30,435 --> 00:29:36,608
RECENTLY POSTED A LITTLE NOTE
TITLED THINGS TO ALWAYS
454
00:29:36,674 --> 00:29:39,711
REMEMBER.
THAT INCLUDED THIS DAVID BOWIE
455
00:29:39,777 --> 00:29:40,645
QUOTE, RIGHT HERE.
>> ONE OF MY FAVORITES.
456
00:29:40,712 --> 00:29:42,881
>> Stephen: WOULD YOU LIKE TO
READ IT OR.
457
00:29:42,947 --> 00:29:44,082
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: READ THIS.
458
00:29:44,149 --> 00:29:48,086
>> THIS QUOTE, I HEARD THIS
QUOTE BEFORE BUT MAKE SURE YOU
459
00:29:48,153 --> 00:29:51,189
WATCH, STAY GREAT MOVIE
DOCUMENTARY.
460
00:29:51,256 --> 00:29:54,726
BUT DAVID BOWIE IS SOMEBODY THAT
I REALLY RESPECT AND ADMIRE.
461
00:29:54,792 --> 00:29:58,129
HE SAID I THINK IT IS TERRIBLY
DANGEROUS FOR AN ARTIST TO
462
00:29:58,196 --> 00:30:01,065
FULFILL OTHER PEOPLE'S
EXPECTATIONS.
463
00:30:01,132 --> 00:30:04,736
IF YOU FEEL SAFE IN THE AREA
THAT YOU ARE WORKING IN, YOU ARE
464
00:30:04,802 --> 00:30:10,408
NOT WORKING IN THE RIGHT AREA.
ALWAYS GO A LITTLE FURTHER INTO
465
00:30:10,475 --> 00:30:13,578
THE WILD WHEN YOU FEEL ARE YOU
CAPABLE OF GOING.
466
00:30:13,645 --> 00:30:16,281
GO A LITTLE BIT OUT OF YOUR
DEPTH AND WHEN YOU DON'T FEEL
467
00:30:16,347 --> 00:30:19,017
THAT YOUR FEET ARE QUITE
TOUCHING THE BOTTOM, YOU ARE
468
00:30:19,083 --> 00:30:24,656
JUST ABOUT IN THE RIGHT PLACE TO
DO SOMETHING EXCITING.
469
00:30:24,722 --> 00:30:27,959
(APPLAUSE).
>> Stephen: THAT'S CHAM ENG.
470
00:30:28,026 --> 00:30:31,429
THAT CAN FEEL DANGEROUS.
>> IT CAN.
471
00:30:31,496 --> 00:30:37,068
IT IS WHEN WE ARE GOING TO FLOAT
IT IS A GOOD REMINDER AS WE
472
00:30:37,135 --> 00:30:40,805
CONTINUE TO CREATE AND MOVE
FORWARD, TO NOT BE AFRAID TO
473
00:30:40,872 --> 00:30:43,074
REIMAGINE WHO WE CAN BE AND
WHERE WE CAN GO.
474
00:30:43,141 --> 00:30:46,211
AND YOU KNOW, THAT'S WHAT I AM
EXCITED ABOUT.
475
00:30:46,277 --> 00:30:47,912
DISCOVERING SOMETHING NEW ABOUT
MYSELF.
476
00:30:47,979 --> 00:30:51,349
>> Stephen: ARE THERE ANY
OTHER NOTES, ANY OTHER THINGS?
477
00:30:51,416 --> 00:30:55,887
>> I PROBABLY DO.
>> Stephen: YOU CAN HAVE THAT,
478
00:30:55,954 --> 00:30:58,256
SURE.
>> MY PHONE, LET'S PULL IT OUT.
479
00:30:58,323 --> 00:31:02,594
I HAVE NOTES, I LOVE NOTES.
I WRITE DOWN THINGS ALL THE
480
00:31:02,660 --> 00:31:04,562
TIME.
ONE OF THEM IS DO NOT GO ON
481
00:31:04,629 --> 00:31:10,902
SOCIAL MEDIA DURING OVULATION.
>> THAT IS ONE OF THE NOTES TO
482
00:31:10,969 --> 00:31:13,938
YOURSELF.
>> NO, SERIOUS.
483
00:31:14,005 --> 00:31:19,644
JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN SAY
SOMETHING THAT-- JUST BECAUSE
484
00:31:19,711 --> 00:31:22,880
YOU CAN DO SOMETHING, DOESN'T
MEAN YOU CAN DO IT OR YOU SHID
485
00:31:22,947 --> 00:31:32,724
DO IT, RATHER.
AND THE OTHER ONE IS OH, IT SAYS
486
00:31:32,790 --> 00:31:36,194
THAT I AM-- OH, I HAVE THE POWER
TO SAY NO.
487
00:31:36,261 --> 00:31:39,764
>> Stephen: WOW.
>> YEAH.
488
00:31:39,831 --> 00:31:43,701
>> I HAVE THE POWER TO SAY NO.
>> YEAH.
489
00:31:43,768 --> 00:31:46,104
>> JUST LITTLE THINGS, YOU KNOW.
>> Stephen: I'M GLAD YOU
490
00:31:46,170 --> 00:31:47,705
DIDN'T SAY NO TO US.
>> I WOULD NEVER SAY NO TO YOU.
491
00:31:47,772 --> 00:31:50,508
YOU ARE MY FAVORITE, THANK YOU
FOR HAVING ME.
492
00:31:50,575 --> 00:31:55,213
>> Stephen: OH, GLASS ONION, A
KNIVES OUT MYSTERY STREAMING NOW
493
00:31:55,280 --> 00:31:58,383
ON NETFLIX, JANELLE MONAE,
EVERYBODY.
494
00:31:58,449 --> 00:32:01,286
WHEN WE COME BACK I'LL BE
COOKING WITH JAMIE OLIVER.
495
00:32:01,352 --> 00:32:04,055
THANK YOU.
496
00:32:14,932 --> 00:32:19,070
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY,
WELCOME BACK.
497
00:32:19,137 --> 00:32:23,374
TO THE LATE SHOW.
WHRAD HES AND GENTLEMEN,
498
00:32:23,441 --> 00:32:24,676
MY NEXT GUEST IS A
WORLD-RENOWNED CHEF AND
499
00:32:24,742 --> 00:32:29,580
RESTAURATEUR WHO HAS WRITTEN
OVER 30 COOKBOOKS.
500
00:32:29,647 --> 00:32:34,419
PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE
SHOW," JAMIE OLIVER!
501
00:32:34,485 --> 00:32:35,553
GOOD TO SEE YOU, NICE TO YOU
HAVE.
502
00:32:35,620 --> 00:32:37,689
ALL RIGHT, SO JAMIE, LET'S GET
TO THE HEAT OF THE MEAT.
503
00:32:37,755 --> 00:32:41,559
WHAT ARE WE DOING?
>> WE'RE GOING TO DO A REALLY
504
00:32:41,626 --> 00:32:44,562
SIMPLE WAY OF COOKING STEAK,
CHICKEN, TURKEY, PORK AND MAKING
505
00:32:44,629 --> 00:32:47,665
IT REALLY, REALLY EXCITING.
>> Stephen: THE NEW BOOK IS
506
00:32:47,732 --> 00:32:52,937
CALLED "ONE."
THEY ARE SIMPLE ONE PAN WONDERS
507
00:32:53,004 --> 00:32:56,274
WFERG EVERYTHING COOKS IN THE
PAN, IF IS THE LOW WASHING UP
508
00:32:56,341 --> 00:32:57,642
COOKING.
ALL RIGHT, GHG TO KEEP IT
509
00:32:57,709 --> 00:32:59,877
SIMPLE.
>> Stephen: WHAT IS THE ONE
510
00:32:59,944 --> 00:33:01,779
PAN WONDER.
>> WE ARE GOING TO TAKE A STEAK,
511
00:33:01,846 --> 00:33:04,515
ANY MEAT YOU WANT, OPEN THAT
MEAT UP, TAKE ANY CUT YOU WANT.
512
00:33:04,582 --> 00:33:10,855
>> Stephen: THE LAST TIME YOU
WERE HERE IN JANUARY OF 2020
513
00:33:10,922 --> 00:33:17,195
YOUR BOOK WAS CALLED ULTIMATE
VEJ, THIS IS A MEAT BACKLASH?
514
00:33:17,261 --> 00:33:21,399
>> WELL, IT IS-- YES.
I MEAN I LOVE VEGGIE DISHES.
515
00:33:21,466 --> 00:33:24,902
I LOVE MEAT, I LOVE FISH.
I LOVE EVERYTHING.
516
00:33:24,969 --> 00:33:26,471
BUT-- .
>> Stephen: DID I DO THE RIGHT
517
00:33:26,537 --> 00:33:28,573
THING, SALT AND PEPPER.
>> A LITTLE PARMESAN.
518
00:33:28,639 --> 00:33:32,243
>> Stephen: OH SURE.
>> SO WHAT WE ARE GOING TO DO
519
00:33:32,310 --> 00:33:36,347
LIKE I SAID, TAKE A STEAK,.
>> Stephen: AS FAR AS I'M
520
00:33:36,414 --> 00:33:39,584
CONCERNED, WE CAN BE DONE RIGHT
HERE, I LIKE MY MEAT PRETTY
521
00:33:39,650 --> 00:33:40,585
RARE.
>> IT WILL GET BETTER.
522
00:33:40,651 --> 00:33:44,389
>> Stephen: HOW MUCH OF THIS
DO I PUT ON THERE.
523
00:33:44,455 --> 00:33:45,390
>> THAT'S ENOUGH.
>> Stephen: FANTASTIC.
524
00:33:45,456 --> 00:33:51,429
>> IT IS SEASONING.
WE TAKE A LITTLE PROSCIUTTO.
525
00:33:51,496 --> 00:33:55,199
>> Stephen: IS ONE OF THE BEST
SEASONINGS FOR MEAT MORE MEAT.
526
00:33:55,266 --> 00:33:56,701
>> YES.
>> Stephen: SHOULD WE HAVE A
527
00:33:56,768 --> 00:33:59,937
CARDIOLOGIST STANDING BY BEFORE
WE TRY THIS.
528
00:34:00,004 --> 00:34:01,072
>> LISTEN.
>> Stephen: THIS REALLY DOES
529
00:34:01,139 --> 00:34:06,644
SEEM LIKE YOU REGRET EVER HAVING
TALKED ABOUT VEGETABLES.
530
00:34:06,711 --> 00:34:11,716
WHAT NOW IS THAT ENOUGH.
>> THERE ARE LLOYDS OF RECIPES,
531
00:34:11,783 --> 00:34:14,886
VEGGIE, MEAT, FISH DISHES.
>> Stephen: YOU'RE GOING TO
532
00:34:14,952 --> 00:34:17,321
SELL THE BOOK.
DO I PUT THIS ON TOP, I'M NOT
533
00:34:17,388 --> 00:34:20,057
GOING TO BURN THE ROSEMARY BY
DOING THIS.
534
00:34:20,124 --> 00:34:22,760
>> NO.
>> Stephen: THIS IS GOOD.
535
00:34:22,827 --> 00:34:25,363
>> TO ADD FLAVOR, TEXTURE,
SPEEDS UP THE COOKING.
536
00:34:25,430 --> 00:34:28,466
WE WILL TENDERIZE IT AS WELL.
>> Stephen: WITH THIS.
537
00:34:28,533 --> 00:34:38,709
>> PUT THAT OVER AND LET THE
EMOTIONS COME OUT.
538
00:34:38,776 --> 00:34:45,683
COME ON.
>> Stephen: YEAH!
539
00:34:45,750 --> 00:34:48,052
>> OKAY.
>> Stephen: SHOULD I BE
540
00:34:48,119 --> 00:34:50,221
SPEAKING ABOUT ANYONE IN
PARTICULAR WHEN I DO.
541
00:34:50,288 --> 00:34:53,658
THIS YOU WERE REHEARSING THIS
WHILE WE WERE REWRITING THE SHOW
542
00:34:53,724 --> 00:34:54,659
DOWNSTAIRS.
>> YEAH.
543
00:34:54,725 --> 00:34:55,626
>> Stephen: AND ALL THIS
THUMPING WAS GOING ON.
544
00:34:55,693 --> 00:34:59,163
WE GO WHAT IS GOING ON.
AND THAT IS JUST JAMIE
545
00:34:59,230 --> 00:35:00,965
TENDERIZES A STEAK.
AND I WAS LIKE AM I REALLY BEING
546
00:35:01,032 --> 00:35:07,305
DISTRACTED BY JAMIE POUND-- HIS
MEAT S THAT SHALL-- IS
547
00:35:07,371 --> 00:35:10,374
THAT-- IT'S 1:00 IN THE MORNING.
>> I KNOW BUT IT WOULDN'T HAVE
548
00:35:10,441 --> 00:35:12,477
BEEN THE FIRST TIME, SO DON'T
WORRY.
549
00:35:12,543 --> 00:35:21,819
>> Stephen: IN WE GO.
>> THE PRODSCIUTTO SIDE DOWN,
550
00:35:21,886 --> 00:35:24,088
FLAVOR, TENDERIZATION, IT WILL
COOK MUCH QUICKER.
551
00:35:24,155 --> 00:35:26,657
LET IT DO ITS THING.
I HAVE A GIFT FOR YOU.
552
00:35:26,724 --> 00:35:30,294
>> Stephen: WHAT DO YOU HAVE?
>> MY FAVORITE RED WINE, I AM
553
00:35:30,361 --> 00:35:32,196
TOLD YOU LIKE AN ITALIAN RED.
>> Stephen: I DO.
554
00:35:32,263 --> 00:35:34,932
>> AND I FOUND THIS FOR AIR
YAITING THE WINE.
555
00:35:34,999 --> 00:35:37,902
I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE THINKING,
NO, NO, IT'S NOT THAT.
556
00:35:37,969 --> 00:35:41,939
WELL, IT COULD BE THAT.
MAYBE NOT.
557
00:35:42,006 --> 00:35:46,944
WE PUT THAT ON ON ON THE BOTTLE
AND IT BASICALLY IS LIKE TWO
558
00:35:47,011 --> 00:35:49,981
HOURS OF AERATION.
YAIRKS I KNOW, I KNOW.
559
00:35:50,047 --> 00:35:52,550
>> Stephen: WHAT IS THIS PART
FOR?
560
00:35:52,617 --> 00:35:57,154
>> IT AIRATES IT.
I MEAN YOU COULD-- .
561
00:35:57,221 --> 00:35:59,790
>> Stephen: IT MAKES THE WINE
GURG EL.
562
00:35:59,857 --> 00:36:03,327
>> HAVE A LITTLE GO SCZ THAT IS
FANTASTIC.
563
00:36:03,394 --> 00:36:08,065
>> WHAT IS THIS WINE.
>> GALATRONA FROM TUSCANY, ONE
564
00:36:08,132 --> 00:36:10,301
OF MY FAVORITE REDS.
>> Stephen: THAT IS BIG, THAT
565
00:36:10,368 --> 00:36:13,905
IS A PUNCH IN THE MOUTH.
>> OH YEAH.
566
00:36:13,971 --> 00:36:15,673
CHEERS.
HAPPY NEW YEAR.
567
00:36:15,740 --> 00:36:18,876
>> Stephen: HAPPY NEW YEAR.
(APPLAUSE).
568
00:36:18,943 --> 00:36:25,683
>> Stephen: DAMN SON.
THAT IS REALLY GOOD.
569
00:36:25,750 --> 00:36:29,086
>> WHAT IS IT LIKE S IT ANY
GOOD?
570
00:36:29,153 --> 00:36:31,656
>> I THINK IT'S REALLY GOOD.
>> I HAVE BEEN CALLED A SAUCER.
571
00:36:31,722 --> 00:36:36,060
>> Stephen: THERE YOU GO.
I'M NOT GOING TO BE WHATEVER
572
00:36:36,127 --> 00:36:39,297
THAT WAS.
YOU CAN'T OUT SPRINKLE ME, MAN.
573
00:36:39,363 --> 00:36:42,266
>> ARE YOU READY.
>> Stephen: LET'S SEE.
574
00:36:42,333 --> 00:36:45,503
>> ONE, TWO, THREE.
>> Stephen: HOLD ON.
575
00:36:45,570 --> 00:36:50,641
>> Stephen: ALL RIGHT, FIRST
TRY, FIRST TRY.
576
00:36:50,708 --> 00:36:59,116
>> YEAH!
(APPLAUSE).
577
00:36:59,183 --> 00:37:02,253
>> Stephen: ALL RIGHT, ALL
RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
578
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:06,490
>> LISTEN, ALWAYS ESTABLISH HE
IS A BETTER-- THAN ME.
579
00:37:06,557 --> 00:37:08,192
COME ON.
>> Stephen: ALL RIGHT, ALL
580
00:37:08,259 --> 00:37:09,894
RIGHT, FRIEND.
>> OKAY,.
581
00:37:09,961 --> 00:37:11,562
>> Stephen: WHAT NOW?
>> YOU CAN COOK IT TO YOUR
582
00:37:11,629 --> 00:37:15,366
LIKING, IT HAS HAD BUILD 30, 40
SECONDS ON THE OTHER SIDE, YOU
583
00:37:15,433 --> 00:37:17,535
CAN SEE THE COLOR WE HAVE
ACHIEVED.
584
00:37:17,602 --> 00:37:21,272
NOW WE WILL SHAKE IT ON TO A
LOVELY BOARD AND IF I MAY, MI
585
00:37:21,339 --> 00:37:25,576
JUST GOING TO SHOW YOU HOW TO
BRING-- THERE IS GARLIC ON YOUR
586
00:37:25,643 --> 00:37:27,345
SIDE.
>> Stephen: THIS RIGHT HERE.
587
00:37:27,411 --> 00:37:29,280
WHAT DO I DO.
>> GARLIC IN THE PAN.
588
00:37:29,347 --> 00:37:33,217
I WANT TO SHOW YOU HOW TO MAKE
GREENS REALLY TASTY.
589
00:37:33,284 --> 00:37:34,518
>> Stephen: OKAY.
PUT WINE IN HERE OR ANYTHING.
590
00:37:34,585 --> 00:37:39,790
>> IF YOU WANT A TEENY BIT.
THAT'S ENOUGH.
591
00:37:39,857 --> 00:37:45,830
A LITTLE ANCHOVIE.
WE GO IN WITH STANDARD BEANS,
592
00:37:45,896 --> 00:37:50,534
YOU MAKE THESE REALLY DELICIOUS.
DON'T ENCOURAGE HIM.
593
00:37:50,601 --> 00:37:54,505
DON'T ENCOURAGE HIM.
WE'RE GOING TO GO IN WITH SOME
594
00:37:54,572 --> 00:37:57,375
SPINACH, RIGHT.
>> Stephen: I THOUGHT WE WERE
595
00:37:57,441 --> 00:38:00,411
MAKING A SAUCE, I'M SORRY.
SOME BEANS.
596
00:38:00,478 --> 00:38:02,847
>> IF YOU WANT TO MAKE THEM
TASTE DELICIOUS.
597
00:38:02,913 --> 00:38:07,218
A LITTLE THIMBLE OF VINEGAR.
>> Stephen: I ADDED WINE.
598
00:38:07,284 --> 00:38:09,620
>> YOU HAVE FAT IN THERE
ALREADY, BUT YOU CAN IF YOU
599
00:38:09,687 --> 00:38:12,990
REALLY WANT TO.
>> Stephen: ALL RIGHT.
600
00:38:13,057 --> 00:38:14,792
>> 30 SECONDS AND WE ARE READY
TO GO.
601
00:38:14,859 --> 00:38:16,894
>> Stephen: A LITTLE LEMON.
>> IF YOU WANT LEMON, YOU ADD
602
00:38:16,961 --> 00:38:19,830
IT, AND YOUR WINE.
>> Stephen: WHAT IS THE LEMON
603
00:38:19,897 --> 00:38:24,235
FOR.
>> IT LOOKS GOOD.
604
00:38:24,301 --> 00:38:25,770
>> Stephen: OKAY, ALL RIGHT,
GREAT.
605
00:38:25,836 --> 00:38:29,640
NOW LET'S PLATE.
>> LET'S SLICE UP THIS BEEF.
606
00:38:29,707 --> 00:38:33,711
AND WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO GO IS
THE MOST DELICIOUS, TENDER,
607
00:38:33,778 --> 00:38:35,513
CRISPY, JUICY.
>> Stephen: DAMN, SON.
608
00:38:35,579 --> 00:38:39,684
>> WE'RE GOING TO HAVE THE
LOVELY BEANS, LIKE WE DON'T WANT
609
00:38:39,750 --> 00:38:43,988
TO OVERCOOK THE GREENS, JUST
WILT IT DOWN, SEASON IT UP.
610
00:38:44,055 --> 00:38:49,593
THE ANCHOVIE IN THERE AS WELL.
WE'LL GO ON TO THE PLATE LIKE.
611
00:38:49,660 --> 00:38:55,266
THIS AND BLESS YOU FOR
SPIN-- AND WE WILL PUT ALL THOSE
612
00:38:55,332 --> 00:39:01,105
BEANS AROUND LIKE THAT.
AND THEN WE ARE GOOD TO GO WHO'S
613
00:39:01,172 --> 00:39:04,642
HUNGRY?
COME ON!
614
00:39:04,709 --> 00:39:19,590
(APPLAUSE)
(APPLAUSE)
615
00:39:19,657 --> 00:39:25,529
(APPLAUSE)
(APPLAUSE)
616
00:39:25,596 --> 00:39:35,206
>> BRAVA!
(APPLAUSE)
617
00:39:35,272 --> 00:39:40,611
>> Stephen: HIS COOKBOOK, "ONE:
SIMPLE ON-PAN WONDERS," IS
618
00:39:40,678 --> 00:39:42,513
AVAILABLE NOW.
JAMIE OLIVER, EVERYBODY!
619
00:39:42,580 --> 00:39:50,554
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
(APPLAUSE)
620
00:40:06,537 --> 00:40:08,572
>> Stephen: THAT'S IT FOR "THE
LATE SHOW."
621
00:40:08,639 --> 00:40:10,307
TUNE IN TOMORROW WHEN MY GUESTS
WILL BE "BLACK PANTHER" STAR
622
00:40:10,374 --> 00:40:11,776
DANAI GURIRA AND JEREMY POPE.
STICK AROUND FOR JAMES CORDEN.
623
00:40:11,842 --> 00:40:17,681
GOOD NIGHT!