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00:00:03,370 --> 00:00:08,440
<font color="#ffff00"> Captioning sponsored by CBS</font>
>> BAD BEHAVIOR IN THE SKY.
LOOK, I KNOW YOU'VE SEEN IT, YOU

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00:00:08,442 --> 00:00:09,008
>> BAD BEHAVIOR IN THE SKY.
LOOK, I KNOW YOU'VE SEEN IT, YOU
HAVE BEEN HEARING ABOUT IT.

3
00:00:09,010 --> 00:00:09,641
LOOK, I KNOW YOU'VE SEEN IT, YOU
HAVE BEEN HEARING ABOUT IT.
IT'S REACHING LEVELS NEVER SEEN

4
00:00:09,643 --> 00:00:13,145
HAVE BEEN HEARING ABOUT IT.
IT'S REACHING LEVELS NEVER SEEN
BEFORE.

5
00:00:13,147 --> 00:00:14,113
IT'S REACHING LEVELS NEVER SEEN
BEFORE.
THE F.A.A. SAY AIRLINES HAVE

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00:00:14,115 --> 00:00:14,713
BEFORE.
THE F.A.A. SAY AIRLINES HAVE
REPORTED 3,000 CASES OF UNRULY

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00:00:14,715 --> 00:00:15,347
THE F.A.A. SAY AIRLINES HAVE
REPORTED 3,000 CASES OF UNRULY
BEHAVIOR BY PASSENGERS JUST THIS

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00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:17,282
REPORTED 3,000 CASES OF UNRULY
BEHAVIOR BY PASSENGERS JUST THIS
YEAR.

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00:00:17,284 --> 00:00:20,452
BEHAVIOR BY PASSENGERS JUST THIS
YEAR.
>> WITH COVID OVER, AIRLINE

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00:00:20,454 --> 00:00:21,320
YEAR.
>> WITH COVID OVER, AIRLINE
TRAVEL IS PICKING UP -- AND SO

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>> WITH COVID OVER, AIRLINE
TRAVEL IS PICKING UP -- AND SO
ARE IN-FLIGHT BRAWLS.

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00:00:24,458 --> 00:00:27,326
TRAVEL IS PICKING UP -- AND SO
ARE IN-FLIGHT BRAWLS.
THAT'S WHY WE ARE PROUD TO

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00:00:27,328 --> 00:00:30,329
ARE IN-FLIGHT BRAWLS.
THAT'S WHY WE ARE PROUD TO
INTRODUCE IGNITED AIRLINES, THE

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00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:32,431
THAT'S WHY WE ARE PROUD TO
INTRODUCE IGNITED AIRLINES, THE
FIRST AIRLINE THAT NOT ONLY

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00:00:32,433 --> 00:00:33,298
INTRODUCE IGNITED AIRLINES, THE
FIRST AIRLINE THAT NOT ONLY
ALLOWS ONBOARD PHYSICAL

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00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:36,402
FIRST AIRLINE THAT NOT ONLY
ALLOWS ONBOARD PHYSICAL
VIOLENCE, WE ENCOURAGE IT.

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00:00:36,404 --> 00:00:39,304
ALLOWS ONBOARD PHYSICAL
VIOLENCE, WE ENCOURAGE IT.
ON IGNITED, EVERY SEAT IS A

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00:00:39,306 --> 00:00:39,938
VIOLENCE, WE ENCOURAGE IT.
ON IGNITED, EVERY SEAT IS A
MIDDLE SEAT, AND EACH ONE HAS A

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00:00:39,940 --> 00:00:41,006
ON IGNITED, EVERY SEAT IS A
MIDDLE SEAT, AND EACH ONE HAS A
VERY STRONG TODDLER KICKING THE

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00:00:41,008 --> 00:00:44,410
MIDDLE SEAT, AND EACH ONE HAS A
VERY STRONG TODDLER KICKING THE
BACK OF IT.

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00:00:44,412 --> 00:00:47,079
VERY STRONG TODDLER KICKING THE
BACK OF IT.
PLUS, ALCOHOL.

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BACK OF IT.
PLUS, ALCOHOL.
AND EVERY TIME YOU'RE JUST ABOUT

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PLUS, ALCOHOL.
AND EVERY TIME YOU'RE JUST ABOUT
TO DRIFT OFF, OUR PILOTS PROVIDE

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00:00:49,050 --> 00:00:51,583
AND EVERY TIME YOU'RE JUST ABOUT
TO DRIFT OFF, OUR PILOTS PROVIDE
INFLAMMATORY UPDATES --

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00:00:51,585 --> 00:00:54,887
TO DRIFT OFF, OUR PILOTS PROVIDE
INFLAMMATORY UPDATES --
>> WE'VE REACHED CRUISING

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00:00:54,889 --> 00:00:56,221
INFLAMMATORY UPDATES --
>> WE'VE REACHED CRUISING
ALTITUDE AND SHOULD BE ARRIVING

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>> WE'VE REACHED CRUISING
ALTITUDE AND SHOULD BE ARRIVING
AT OUR DESTINATION ON TIME.

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ALTITUDE AND SHOULD BE ARRIVING
AT OUR DESTINATION ON TIME.
ALSO, THAT GUY IN THE SEAT AHEAD

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00:00:59,960 --> 00:01:00,492
AT OUR DESTINATION ON TIME.
ALSO, THAT GUY IN THE SEAT AHEAD
OF YOU JUST SAID SOMETHING

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00:01:00,494 --> 00:01:01,927
ALSO, THAT GUY IN THE SEAT AHEAD
OF YOU JUST SAID SOMETHING
HORRIBLE ABOUT YOUR MOTHER.

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00:01:01,929 --> 00:01:03,195
OF YOU JUST SAID SOMETHING
HORRIBLE ABOUT YOUR MOTHER.
ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE THAT?

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00:01:03,197 --> 00:01:03,429
HORRIBLE ABOUT YOUR MOTHER.
ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE THAT?
ARE YOU?

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00:01:03,431 --> 00:01:07,766
ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE THAT?
ARE YOU?
>> AND ALCOHOL.

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00:01:07,768 --> 00:01:09,234
ARE YOU?
>> AND ALCOHOL.
WE NOT ONLY MAKE YOU WEAR A

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00:01:09,236 --> 00:01:12,438
>> AND ALCOHOL.
WE NOT ONLY MAKE YOU WEAR A
MASK, BUT ALSO PANTS THAT ARE A

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00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:14,840
WE NOT ONLY MAKE YOU WEAR A
MASK, BUT ALSO PANTS THAT ARE A
LITTLE TOO TIGHT.

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MASK, BUT ALSO PANTS THAT ARE A
LITTLE TOO TIGHT.
SO GET READY FOR THE FASTEN

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LITTLE TOO TIGHT.
SO GET READY FOR THE FASTEN
SEATBELT TO BE FASTEN

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SO GET READY FOR THE FASTEN
SEATBELT TO BE FASTEN
NECK-HANDS.

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SEATBELT TO BE FASTEN
NECK-HANDS.
AND BOOK YOUR NEXT FLIGHT TODAY,

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00:01:21,315 --> 00:01:23,582
NECK-HANDS.
AND BOOK YOUR NEXT FLIGHT TODAY,
IGNITED AIRLINES.

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00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:24,450
AND BOOK YOUR NEXT FLIGHT TODAY,
IGNITED AIRLINES.
♪ LOSE YOUR (  BLEEP  ) IN THE

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IGNITED AIRLINES.
♪ LOSE YOUR (  BLEEP  ) IN THE
SKY ♪

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>> Announcer: IT'S "THE LATE
SHOW" WITH STEPHEN COLBERT!
TONIGHT, WE OPEN STATE OF MIND.

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00:01:36,263 --> 00:01:40,432
SHOW" WITH STEPHEN COLBERT!
TONIGHT, WE OPEN STATE OF MIND.
PLUS STEPHEN WELCOMES AROUND

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TONIGHT, WE OPEN STATE OF MIND.
PLUS STEPHEN WELCOMES AROUND
AROUND!

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PLUS STEPHEN WELCOMES AROUND
AROUND!
AND LORDE.

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AROUND!
AND LORDE.
WITH A SPECIAL APPEARANCE BY

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AND LORDE.
WITH A SPECIAL APPEARANCE BY
GILBERT GOTTFRIED, FEATURING JON

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WITH A SPECIAL APPEARANCE BY
GILBERT GOTTFRIED, FEATURING JON
BATISTE AND "STAY HUMAN."

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GILBERT GOTTFRIED, FEATURING JON
BATISTE AND "STAY HUMAN."
NOW LIVE ON TAPE FROM THE ED

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BATISTE AND "STAY HUMAN."
NOW LIVE ON TAPE FROM THE ED
SULLIVAN THEATER IN NEW YORK

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NOW LIVE ON TAPE FROM THE ED
SULLIVAN THEATER IN NEW YORK
CITY, IT'S STEPHEN COLBERT!

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SULLIVAN THEATER IN NEW YORK
CITY, IT'S STEPHEN COLBERT!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

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00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:05,290
CITY, IT'S STEPHEN COLBERT!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪♪

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00:02:05,292 --> 00:02:08,460
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪♪
>> Stephen: HEY!

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♪♪♪
>> Stephen: HEY!
HEY, EVERYBODY!

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>> Stephen: HEY!
HEY, EVERYBODY!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

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00:02:12,533 --> 00:02:16,135
HEY, EVERYBODY!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
HELLO, JON.

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00:02:16,137 --> 00:02:18,737
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
HELLO, JON.
HEY, EVERYBODY!

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00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:19,938
HELLO, JON.
HEY, EVERYBODY!
NICE TO SEE YOU!

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00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:21,206
HEY, EVERYBODY!
NICE TO SEE YOU!
WHAT'S UP!

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00:02:21,208 --> 00:02:22,541
NICE TO SEE YOU!
WHAT'S UP!
THANKS, EVERYBODY.

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00:02:22,543 --> 00:02:25,577
WHAT'S UP!
THANKS, EVERYBODY.
WELCOME WELCOME, LADIES AND

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00:02:25,579 --> 00:02:29,047
THANKS, EVERYBODY.
WELCOME WELCOME, LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN, TO "THE LATE SHOW."

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00:02:29,049 --> 00:02:29,581
WELCOME WELCOME, LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN, TO "THE LATE SHOW."
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

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GENTLEMEN, TO "THE LATE SHOW."
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
IT'S FEELING GOOD.

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00:02:30,551 --> 00:02:30,949
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
IT'S FEELING GOOD.
IT'S FEELING GOOD.

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00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:33,318
IT'S FEELING GOOD.
IT'S FEELING GOOD.
I AM YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.

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00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:36,455
IT'S FEELING GOOD.
I AM YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

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I AM YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
SUMMER HAS OFFICIALLY -- I LIKE

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00:02:37,558 --> 00:02:39,224
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
SUMMER HAS OFFICIALLY -- I LIKE
IT, I LIKE IT.

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00:02:39,226 --> 00:02:40,225
SUMMER HAS OFFICIALLY -- I LIKE
IT, I LIKE IT.
SUMMER HAS OFFICIALLY BEGUN.

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00:02:40,227 --> 00:02:41,093
IT, I LIKE IT.
SUMMER HAS OFFICIALLY BEGUN.
TODAY WAS THE LONGEST DAY OF THE

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00:02:41,095 --> 00:02:43,428
SUMMER HAS OFFICIALLY BEGUN.
TODAY WAS THE LONGEST DAY OF THE
YEAR, ALSO KNOWN AS "JUNE

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TODAY WAS THE LONGEST DAY OF THE
YEAR, ALSO KNOWN AS "JUNE
21ST, THE SNYDER CUT."

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YEAR, ALSO KNOWN AS "JUNE
21ST, THE SNYDER CUT."
THE COUNTRY IS OPENING UP AS TH

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00:02:48,435 --> 00:02:50,736
21ST, THE SNYDER CUT."
THE COUNTRY IS OPENING UP AS TH
( LAUGHTER )

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00:02:50,738 --> 00:02:51,336
THE COUNTRY IS OPENING UP AS TH
( LAUGHTER )
WEATHER GETS WARMER.

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00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:52,070
( LAUGHTER )
WEATHER GETS WARMER.
WE ALL FINALLY PUT ON PANTS

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00:02:52,072 --> 00:02:52,704
WEATHER GETS WARMER.
WE ALL FINALLY PUT ON PANTS
JUST IN TIME TO REALIZE IT'S TOO

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WE ALL FINALLY PUT ON PANTS
JUST IN TIME TO REALIZE IT'S TOO
HOT FOR PANTS.

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JUST IN TIME TO REALIZE IT'S TOO
HOT FOR PANTS.
( LAUGHTER )

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HOT FOR PANTS.
( LAUGHTER )
CASE IN POINT, LAST NIGHT, THE

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00:03:01,549 --> 00:03:03,315
( LAUGHTER )
CASE IN POINT, LAST NIGHT, THE
FIRST U.S. CRUISE SHIP IN 15

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00:03:03,317 --> 00:03:07,319
CASE IN POINT, LAST NIGHT, THE
FIRST U.S. CRUISE SHIP IN 15
MONTHS SET SAIL.

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00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:07,619
FIRST U.S. CRUISE SHIP IN 15
MONTHS SET SAIL.
( APPLAUSE )

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00:03:07,621 --> 00:03:09,321
MONTHS SET SAIL.
( APPLAUSE )
IT'S PERFECT FOR ANYONE -- I'M

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00:03:09,323 --> 00:03:12,658
( APPLAUSE )
IT'S PERFECT FOR ANYONE -- I'M
NOT SURE WHAT YOU WERE

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00:03:12,660 --> 00:03:13,058
IT'S PERFECT FOR ANYONE -- I'M
NOT SURE WHAT YOU WERE
APPLAUDING -- BUT

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00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:14,126
NOT SURE WHAT YOU WERE
APPLAUDING -- BUT
IT'S PERFECT FOR ANYONE WHO'S

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00:03:14,128 --> 00:03:14,927
APPLAUDING -- BUT
IT'S PERFECT FOR ANYONE WHO'S
BEEN STUCK IN THEIR HOUSE FOR 15

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IT'S PERFECT FOR ANYONE WHO'S
BEEN STUCK IN THEIR HOUSE FOR 15
MONTHS AND THOUGHT, "THIS HAS

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00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:16,161
BEEN STUCK IN THEIR HOUSE FOR 15
MONTHS AND THOUGHT, "THIS HAS
BEEN GREAT, BUT I JUST WISH THE

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MONTHS AND THOUGHT, "THIS HAS
BEEN GREAT, BUT I JUST WISH THE
ROOM WAS MUCH SMALLER AND SLOWLY

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00:03:16,864 --> 00:03:20,399
BEEN GREAT, BUT I JUST WISH THE
ROOM WAS MUCH SMALLER AND SLOWLY
ROCKING."

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ROOM WAS MUCH SMALLER AND SLOWLY
ROCKING."
( LAUGHTER )

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ROCKING."
( LAUGHTER )
THIS CRUISE IS A C.D.C. MANDATED

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00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:27,406
( LAUGHTER )
THIS CRUISE IS A C.D.C. MANDATED
TEST THAT'S CARRYING ONLY

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00:03:27,408 --> 00:03:28,440
THIS CRUISE IS A C.D.C. MANDATED
TEST THAT'S CARRYING ONLY
ROYAL CARIBBEAN EMPLOYEES WHO

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TEST THAT'S CARRYING ONLY
ROYAL CARIBBEAN EMPLOYEES WHO
VOLUNTEERED.

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ROYAL CARIBBEAN EMPLOYEES WHO
VOLUNTEERED.
IF THEY GET SICK, THE COMPANY

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00:03:38,485 --> 00:03:38,750
VOLUNTEERED.
IF THEY GET SICK, THE COMPANY
KNOWS IT'S

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IF THEY GET SICK, THE COMPANY
KNOWS IT'S
UNSAFE FOR PAYING CUSTOMERS.

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KNOWS IT'S
UNSAFE FOR PAYING CUSTOMERS.
IT'S LESS VACATION AND

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00:03:40,454 --> 00:03:43,121
UNSAFE FOR PAYING CUSTOMERS.
IT'S LESS VACATION AND
MORE "CANARY IN A CONGA LINE."

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00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:43,422
IT'S LESS VACATION AND
MORE "CANARY IN A CONGA LINE."
( LAUGHTER )

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00:03:43,424 --> 00:03:44,423
MORE "CANARY IN A CONGA LINE."
( LAUGHTER )
THE EMPLOYEES AREN'T GOING

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( LAUGHTER )
THE EMPLOYEES AREN'T GOING
ALONE, BECAUSE THEY WERE ALLOWED

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THE EMPLOYEES AREN'T GOING
ALONE, BECAUSE THEY WERE ALLOWED
TO BRING AN 18-AND-OVER

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ALONE, BECAUSE THEY WERE ALLOWED
TO BRING AN 18-AND-OVER
GUEST.

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TO BRING AN 18-AND-OVER
GUEST.
SO, MATT GAETZ WILL NOT BE

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GUEST.
SO, MATT GAETZ WILL NOT BE
GOING.

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SO, MATT GAETZ WILL NOT BE
GOING.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

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GOING.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THERE YOU GO.

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00:03:58,572 --> 00:03:59,871
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THERE YOU GO.
MATT GAETZ.

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00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:00,239
THERE YOU GO.
MATT GAETZ.
BAD.

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00:04:00,241 --> 00:04:00,405
MATT GAETZ.
BAD.
BAD.

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BAD.
BAD.
>> Jon: OH, COME ON, MAN.

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00:04:03,744 --> 00:04:07,679
BAD.
>> Jon: OH, COME ON, MAN.
>> Stephen: NEW YORK IS ALSO

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>> Jon: OH, COME ON, MAN.
>> Stephen: NEW YORK IS ALSO
REOPENING.

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00:04:08,449 --> 00:04:11,450
>> Stephen: NEW YORK IS ALSO
REOPENING.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

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00:04:11,452 --> 00:04:12,084
REOPENING.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: YEAH.

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00:04:12,086 --> 00:04:15,320
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: YEAH.
IT'S A GOOD FEELING.

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00:04:15,322 --> 00:04:16,221
>> Stephen: YEAH.
IT'S A GOOD FEELING.
( PIANO RIFF )

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00:04:16,223 --> 00:04:22,661
IT'S A GOOD FEELING.
( PIANO RIFF )
CASE IN POINT -- LAST WEEK,

127
00:04:22,663 --> 00:04:23,128
( PIANO RIFF )
CASE IN POINT -- LAST WEEK,
GOVERNOR ANDREW CUOMO

128
00:04:23,130 --> 00:04:24,296
CASE IN POINT -- LAST WEEK,
GOVERNOR ANDREW CUOMO
LIFTED MOST

129
00:04:24,298 --> 00:04:24,830
GOVERNOR ANDREW CUOMO
LIFTED MOST
CORONAVIRUS RESTRICTIONS,

130
00:04:24,832 --> 00:04:25,664
LIFTED MOST
CORONAVIRUS RESTRICTIONS,
CALLING IT A "RETURN TO LIFE AS

131
00:04:25,666 --> 00:04:26,398
CORONAVIRUS RESTRICTIONS,
CALLING IT A "RETURN TO LIFE AS
WE KNOW IT."

132
00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:26,965
CALLING IT A "RETURN TO LIFE AS
WE KNOW IT."
SO THIS WEEKEND, NEW YORKERS

133
00:04:26,967 --> 00:04:27,566
WE KNOW IT."
SO THIS WEEKEND, NEW YORKERS
COULD ONCE AGAIN PLAY THE

134
00:04:27,568 --> 00:04:33,338
SO THIS WEEKEND, NEW YORKERS
COULD ONCE AGAIN PLAY THE
CLASSIC BIG APPLE GUESSING

135
00:04:33,340 --> 00:04:36,441
COULD ONCE AGAIN PLAY THE
CLASSIC BIG APPLE GUESSING
GAME: "PUDDLE OR PEE?"

136
00:04:36,443 --> 00:04:39,311
CLASSIC BIG APPLE GUESSING
GAME: "PUDDLE OR PEE?"
( LAUGHTER )

137
00:04:39,313 --> 00:04:44,449
GAME: "PUDDLE OR PEE?"
( LAUGHTER )
HOT TIP: IS IT HOT?

138
00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:45,317
( LAUGHTER )
HOT TIP: IS IT HOT?
( LAUGHTER )

139
00:04:45,319 --> 00:04:48,420
HOT TIP: IS IT HOT?
( LAUGHTER )
ANOTHER SIGN OF LIFE, LAST NIGHT

140
00:04:48,422 --> 00:04:50,622
( LAUGHTER )
ANOTHER SIGN OF LIFE, LAST NIGHT
THE FOO FIGHTERS ROCKED MADISON

141
00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:51,290
ANOTHER SIGN OF LIFE, LAST NIGHT
THE FOO FIGHTERS ROCKED MADISON
SQUARE GARDEN IN THE FIRST FULL

142
00:04:51,292 --> 00:04:56,461
THE FOO FIGHTERS ROCKED MADISON
SQUARE GARDEN IN THE FIRST FULL
CAPACITY SHOW IN NEW YORK CITY

143
00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:57,362
SQUARE GARDEN IN THE FIRST FULL
CAPACITY SHOW IN NEW YORK CITY
SINCE RESTRICTIONS LIFTED.

144
00:04:57,364 --> 00:05:00,399
CAPACITY SHOW IN NEW YORK CITY
SINCE RESTRICTIONS LIFTED.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

145
00:05:00,401 --> 00:05:03,335
SINCE RESTRICTIONS LIFTED.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
HELL, YEAH!

146
00:05:03,337 --> 00:05:04,036
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
HELL, YEAH!
FOO FIGHTERS AT MADISON SQUARE

147
00:05:04,038 --> 00:05:08,440
HELL, YEAH!
FOO FIGHTERS AT MADISON SQUARE
GARDEN WERE BACK TO NORMAL!

148
00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:08,874
FOO FIGHTERS AT MADISON SQUARE
GARDEN WERE BACK TO NORMAL!
ALSO, BACK TO 1995!

149
00:05:08,876 --> 00:05:09,341
GARDEN WERE BACK TO NORMAL!
ALSO, BACK TO 1995!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

150
00:05:09,343 --> 00:05:09,941
ALSO, BACK TO 1995!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THE FOOS BROUGHT ON A SPECIAL

151
00:05:09,943 --> 00:05:14,379
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THE FOOS BROUGHT ON A SPECIAL
GUEST:

152
00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:16,448
THE FOOS BROUGHT ON A SPECIAL
GUEST:
♪ BUT I'M A CREEP ♪

153
00:05:16,450 --> 00:05:19,251
GUEST:
♪ BUT I'M A CREEP ♪
♪ I'M A WEIRDO ♪

154
00:05:19,253 --> 00:05:19,885
♪ BUT I'M A CREEP ♪
♪ I'M A WEIRDO ♪
>> STEPHEN: FOO FIGHTERS AND

155
00:05:19,887 --> 00:05:20,452
♪ I'M A WEIRDO ♪
>> STEPHEN: FOO FIGHTERS AND
DAVE CHAPELLE SINGING A

156
00:05:20,454 --> 00:05:22,921
>> STEPHEN: FOO FIGHTERS AND
DAVE CHAPELLE SINGING A
RADIOHEAD CLASSIC?

157
00:05:22,923 --> 00:05:25,991
DAVE CHAPELLE SINGING A
RADIOHEAD CLASSIC?
THAT IS AWESOME.

158
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:26,558
RADIOHEAD CLASSIC?
THAT IS AWESOME.
THAT'S PERFECT.

159
00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:28,260
THAT IS AWESOME.
THAT'S PERFECT.
I HAVEN'T SEEN A COMEDIAN

160
00:05:28,262 --> 00:05:29,061
THAT'S PERFECT.
I HAVEN'T SEEN A COMEDIAN
ROCK OUT THIS HARD SINCE

161
00:05:29,063 --> 00:05:29,828
I HAVEN'T SEEN A COMEDIAN
ROCK OUT THIS HARD SINCE
HENNY YOUNGMAN SAT IN WITH LED

162
00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:32,431
ROCK OUT THIS HARD SINCE
HENNY YOUNGMAN SAT IN WITH LED
ZEPPELIN.

163
00:05:32,433 --> 00:05:34,232
HENNY YOUNGMAN SAT IN WITH LED
ZEPPELIN.
( LAUGHTER )

164
00:05:34,234 --> 00:05:38,470
ZEPPELIN.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Jon: GOOD OLD HENNY.

165
00:05:38,472 --> 00:05:39,438
( LAUGHTER )
>> Jon: GOOD OLD HENNY.
( LAUGHTER )

166
00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:41,039
>> Jon: GOOD OLD HENNY.
( LAUGHTER )
THE FOO FIGHTERS AREN'T THE ONLY

167
00:05:41,041 --> 00:05:42,140
( LAUGHTER )
THE FOO FIGHTERS AREN'T THE ONLY
ONES HITTING THE ROAD.

168
00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:42,774
THE FOO FIGHTERS AREN'T THE ONLY
ONES HITTING THE ROAD.
THERE'S ALSO A NEW TOUR

169
00:05:42,776 --> 00:05:43,975
ONES HITTING THE ROAD.
THERE'S ALSO A NEW TOUR
FEATURING FORMER FOX NEWS HOST

170
00:05:43,977 --> 00:05:44,476
THERE'S ALSO A NEW TOUR
FEATURING FORMER FOX NEWS HOST
BILL O'REILLY AND FORMER

171
00:05:44,478 --> 00:05:51,350
FEATURING FORMER FOX NEWS HOST
BILL O'REILLY AND FORMER
PRESIDENT,"THE FLAG FONDLER."

172
00:05:51,352 --> 00:06:05,931
BILL O'REILLY AND FORMER
PRESIDENT,"THE FLAG FONDLER."
( BOOING )

173
00:06:05,933 --> 00:06:08,166
PRESIDENT,"THE FLAG FONDLER."
( BOOING )
>> Stephen: BUT HOW DO YOU

174
00:06:08,168 --> 00:06:08,467
( BOOING )
>> Stephen: BUT HOW DO YOU
FEEL?

175
00:06:08,469 --> 00:06:09,301
>> Stephen: BUT HOW DO YOU
FEEL?
( LAUGHTER )

176
00:06:09,303 --> 00:06:09,968
FEEL?
( LAUGHTER )
THE PAIR ARE MAKING SEVERAL

177
00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:12,404
( LAUGHTER )
THE PAIR ARE MAKING SEVERAL
PUBLIC APPEARANCES IN DECEMBER

178
00:06:12,406 --> 00:06:14,573
THE PAIR ARE MAKING SEVERAL
PUBLIC APPEARANCES IN DECEMBER
THAT THEY'RE CALLING

179
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:15,006
PUBLIC APPEARANCES IN DECEMBER
THAT THEY'RE CALLING
"THE HISTORY TOUR."

180
00:06:15,008 --> 00:06:15,607
THAT THEY'RE CALLING
"THE HISTORY TOUR."
I ASSUME BECAUSE THEIR CAREERS

181
00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:20,445
"THE HISTORY TOUR."
I ASSUME BECAUSE THEIR CAREERS
ARE HISTORY.

182
00:06:20,447 --> 00:06:22,781
I ASSUME BECAUSE THEIR CAREERS
ARE HISTORY.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

183
00:06:22,783 --> 00:06:24,716
ARE HISTORY.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Jon: THE PEOPLE HAVE

184
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:24,950
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Jon: THE PEOPLE HAVE
SPOKEN!

185
00:06:24,952 --> 00:06:27,352
>> Jon: THE PEOPLE HAVE
SPOKEN!
>> Stephen: HEY, LOOK AT YOU.

186
00:06:27,354 --> 00:06:28,453
SPOKEN!
>> Stephen: HEY, LOOK AT YOU.
BUT THE TOUR IS CAUSING ANXIETY

187
00:06:28,455 --> 00:06:29,821
>> Stephen: HEY, LOOK AT YOU.
BUT THE TOUR IS CAUSING ANXIETY
IN MAGA WORLD BECAUSE

188
00:06:29,823 --> 00:06:30,622
BUT THE TOUR IS CAUSING ANXIETY
IN MAGA WORLD BECAUSE
"MANY QANON SUPPORTERS NOW

189
00:06:30,624 --> 00:06:32,224
IN MAGA WORLD BECAUSE
"MANY QANON SUPPORTERS NOW
BELIEVE THAT

190
00:06:32,226 --> 00:06:32,824
"MANY QANON SUPPORTERS NOW
BELIEVE THAT
TRUMP WILL RETURN IN AUGUST."

191
00:06:32,826 --> 00:06:33,358
BELIEVE THAT
TRUMP WILL RETURN IN AUGUST."
AND AS ONE

192
00:06:33,360 --> 00:06:34,593
TRUMP WILL RETURN IN AUGUST."
AND AS ONE
SUPPORTER PUT IT

193
00:06:34,595 --> 00:06:36,461
AND AS ONE
SUPPORTER PUT IT
"A REINSTATED PRESIDENT DOESN'T

194
00:06:36,463 --> 00:06:40,432
SUPPORTER PUT IT
"A REINSTATED PRESIDENT DOESN'T
GO ON TOUR."

195
00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:44,436
"A REINSTATED PRESIDENT DOESN'T
GO ON TOUR."
( LAUGHTER )

196
00:06:44,438 --> 00:06:49,674
GO ON TOUR."
( LAUGHTER )
OR DO ANYTHING ELSE BECAUSE

197
00:06:49,676 --> 00:06:51,376
( LAUGHTER )
OR DO ANYTHING ELSE BECAUSE
THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A

198
00:06:51,378 --> 00:06:52,411
OR DO ANYTHING ELSE BECAUSE
THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A
REINSTATED PRESIDENT.

199
00:06:52,413 --> 00:06:52,911
THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A
REINSTATED PRESIDENT.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

200
00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:53,845
REINSTATED PRESIDENT.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
WHILE HE'S ON TOUR

201
00:06:53,847 --> 00:06:54,446
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
WHILE HE'S ON TOUR
THE QUARTER-FLOUNDER MAY HAVE

202
00:06:54,448 --> 00:06:56,214
WHILE HE'S ON TOUR
THE QUARTER-FLOUNDER MAY HAVE
SOME EXPLAINING TO DO.

203
00:06:56,216 --> 00:06:56,882
THE QUARTER-FLOUNDER MAY HAVE
SOME EXPLAINING TO DO.
BECAUSE A NEW BOOK IS

204
00:06:56,884 --> 00:06:57,449
SOME EXPLAINING TO DO.
BECAUSE A NEW BOOK IS
REVEALING DETAILS ABOUT HIS

205
00:06:57,451 --> 00:06:59,117
BECAUSE A NEW BOOK IS
REVEALING DETAILS ABOUT HIS
COVID RESPONSE.

206
00:06:59,119 --> 00:07:00,452
REVEALING DETAILS ABOUT HIS
COVID RESPONSE.
THE MAIN DETAIL: THERE WASN'T

207
00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:03,388
COVID RESPONSE.
THE MAIN DETAIL: THERE WASN'T
ONE.

208
00:07:03,390 --> 00:07:04,456
THE MAIN DETAIL: THERE WASN'T
ONE.
FOR INSTANCE, EARLY IN THE

209
00:07:04,458 --> 00:07:05,056
ONE.
FOR INSTANCE, EARLY IN THE
PANDEMIC, THERE WERE AMERICAN

210
00:07:05,058 --> 00:07:07,859
FOR INSTANCE, EARLY IN THE
PANDEMIC, THERE WERE AMERICAN
TOURISTS ABROAD AND CRUISE

211
00:07:07,861 --> 00:07:08,393
PANDEMIC, THERE WERE AMERICAN
TOURISTS ABROAD AND CRUISE
SHIPS LOADED WITH INFECTED

212
00:07:08,395 --> 00:07:12,164
TOURISTS ABROAD AND CRUISE
SHIPS LOADED WITH INFECTED
PASSENGERS THAT NO ONE KNEW WHAT

213
00:07:12,166 --> 00:07:12,464
SHIPS LOADED WITH INFECTED
PASSENGERS THAT NO ONE KNEW WHAT
TO DO WITH.

214
00:07:12,466 --> 00:07:15,367
PASSENGERS THAT NO ONE KNEW WHAT
TO DO WITH.
THE THEN PRESIDENT REPORTEDLY

215
00:07:15,369 --> 00:07:20,305
TO DO WITH.
THE THEN PRESIDENT REPORTEDLY
ASKED, "DON'T WE HAVE AN ISLAND

216
00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:20,605
THE THEN PRESIDENT REPORTEDLY
ASKED, "DON'T WE HAVE AN ISLAND
THAT WE OWN?

217
00:07:20,607 --> 00:07:24,276
ASKED, "DON'T WE HAVE AN ISLAND
THAT WE OWN?
WHAT ABOUT GUANTANAMO?"

218
00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:24,843
THAT WE OWN?
WHAT ABOUT GUANTANAMO?"
THE PRESIDENT WANTED TO SEND

219
00:07:24,845 --> 00:07:26,378
WHAT ABOUT GUANTANAMO?"
THE PRESIDENT WANTED TO SEND
CRUISE SHIP PASSENGERS TO GITMO.

220
00:07:26,380 --> 00:07:26,812
THE PRESIDENT WANTED TO SEND
CRUISE SHIP PASSENGERS TO GITMO.
SO, ENJOY YOUR BEACH

221
00:07:26,814 --> 00:07:27,379
CRUISE SHIP PASSENGERS TO GITMO.
SO, ENJOY YOUR BEACH
DAY WITH COMPLIMENTARY

222
00:07:27,381 --> 00:07:28,447
SO, ENJOY YOUR BEACH
DAY WITH COMPLIMENTARY
HEAD SACKS.

223
00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:31,349
DAY WITH COMPLIMENTARY
HEAD SACKS.
THEN HIT THE BAR FOR BOTTOMLESS

224
00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:31,817
HEAD SACKS.
THEN HIT THE BAR FOR BOTTOMLESS
PINA-COLADA-BOARDING.

225
00:07:31,819 --> 00:07:32,417
THEN HIT THE BAR FOR BOTTOMLESS
PINA-COLADA-BOARDING.
( LAUGHTER )

226
00:07:32,419 --> 00:07:36,455
PINA-COLADA-BOARDING.
( LAUGHTER )
THOSE PEOPLE COMING OFF CRUISE

227
00:07:36,457 --> 00:07:43,662
( LAUGHTER )
THOSE PEOPLE COMING OFF CRUISE
SHIPS WERE A REAL PROBLEM FOR

228
00:07:43,664 --> 00:07:44,429
THOSE PEOPLE COMING OFF CRUISE
SHIPS WERE A REAL PROBLEM FOR
DICK A L'ORANGE --

229
00:07:44,431 --> 00:07:48,433
SHIPS WERE A REAL PROBLEM FOR
DICK A L'ORANGE --
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

230
00:07:48,435 --> 00:07:49,668
DICK A L'ORANGE --
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Jon: A LOT OF NEW NAMES.

231
00:07:49,670 --> 00:07:51,803
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Jon: A LOT OF NEW NAMES.
>> Stephen: THAT ONE HIT A

232
00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,572
>> Jon: A LOT OF NEW NAMES.
>> Stephen: THAT ONE HIT A
SWEET SPOT.

233
00:07:53,574 --> 00:07:53,872
>> Stephen: THAT ONE HIT A
SWEET SPOT.
( LAUGHTER )

234
00:07:53,874 --> 00:07:55,307
SWEET SPOT.
( LAUGHTER )
-- BECAUSE THEY INCREASED THE

235
00:07:55,309 --> 00:07:55,774
( LAUGHTER )
-- BECAUSE THEY INCREASED THE
NUMBER OF COVID CASES.

236
00:07:55,776 --> 00:07:56,441
-- BECAUSE THEY INCREASED THE
NUMBER OF COVID CASES.
ACCORDING TO THE BOOK, HE WAS

237
00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:59,611
NUMBER OF COVID CASES.
ACCORDING TO THE BOOK, HE WAS
OBSESSED WITH

238
00:07:59,613 --> 00:08:00,445
ACCORDING TO THE BOOK, HE WAS
OBSESSED WITH
HOW THE NUMBERS REFLECTED ON

239
00:08:00,447 --> 00:08:03,281
OBSESSED WITH
HOW THE NUMBERS REFLECTED ON
HIM, SCREAMING LOUDLY ON THE

240
00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:03,882
HOW THE NUMBERS REFLECTED ON
HIM, SCREAMING LOUDLY ON THE
PHONE TO H.H.S. SECRETARY ALEX

241
00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:07,719
HIM, SCREAMING LOUDLY ON THE
PHONE TO H.H.S. SECRETARY ALEX
AZAR: "I'M GOING TO LOSE THE

242
00:08:07,721 --> 00:08:08,453
PHONE TO H.H.S. SECRETARY ALEX
AZAR: "I'M GOING TO LOSE THE
ELECTION BECAUSE OF TESTING!

243
00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:13,625
AZAR: "I'M GOING TO LOSE THE
ELECTION BECAUSE OF TESTING!
WHAT IDIOT HAD THE FEDERAL

244
00:08:13,627 --> 00:08:14,125
ELECTION BECAUSE OF TESTING!
WHAT IDIOT HAD THE FEDERAL
GOVERNMENT DO TESTING?"

245
00:08:14,127 --> 00:08:15,327
WHAT IDIOT HAD THE FEDERAL
GOVERNMENT DO TESTING?"
TO WHICH AZAR RESPONDED, "UH, DO

246
00:08:15,329 --> 00:08:17,863
GOVERNMENT DO TESTING?"
TO WHICH AZAR RESPONDED, "UH, DO
YOU MEAN JARED?"

247
00:08:17,865 --> 00:08:18,463
TO WHICH AZAR RESPONDED, "UH, DO
YOU MEAN JARED?"
( LAUGHTER )

248
00:08:18,465 --> 00:08:18,763
YOU MEAN JARED?"
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )

249
00:08:18,765 --> 00:08:21,366
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
>> Jon: WOW.

250
00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:23,268
( APPLAUSE )
>> Jon: WOW.
WOW.

251
00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:26,171
>> Jon: WOW.
WOW.
>> Stephen: IMAGINE -- IMAGINE

252
00:08:26,173 --> 00:08:27,038
WOW.
>> Stephen: IMAGINE -- IMAGINE
BEING IN THAT

253
00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:27,572
>> Stephen: IMAGINE -- IMAGINE
BEING IN THAT
ADMINISTRATION AND SOMEONE

254
00:08:27,574 --> 00:08:30,609
BEING IN THAT
ADMINISTRATION AND SOMEONE
CALLING YOU "THE IDIOT."

255
00:08:30,611 --> 00:08:30,909
ADMINISTRATION AND SOMEONE
CALLING YOU "THE IDIOT."
( LAUGHTER )

256
00:08:30,911 --> 00:08:31,510
CALLING YOU "THE IDIOT."
( LAUGHTER )
IT'S LIKE BEING IN THE N.B.A.

257
00:08:31,512 --> 00:08:32,444
( LAUGHTER )
IT'S LIKE BEING IN THE N.B.A.
AND YOUR NICKNAME IS "THE

258
00:08:32,446 --> 00:08:34,412
IT'S LIKE BEING IN THE N.B.A.
AND YOUR NICKNAME IS "THE
TALL GUY."

259
00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:34,713
AND YOUR NICKNAME IS "THE
TALL GUY."
( LAUGHTER )

260
00:08:34,715 --> 00:08:36,448
TALL GUY."
( LAUGHTER )
KUSHNER DOESN'T COME OFF WELL IN

261
00:08:36,450 --> 00:08:36,915
( LAUGHTER )
KUSHNER DOESN'T COME OFF WELL IN
THE BOOK.

262
00:08:36,917 --> 00:08:39,251
KUSHNER DOESN'T COME OFF WELL IN
THE BOOK.
IN MARCH OF 2020, WHEN KUSHNER

263
00:08:39,253 --> 00:08:39,784
THE BOOK.
IN MARCH OF 2020, WHEN KUSHNER
LEARNED 600 MILLION MASKS

264
00:08:39,786 --> 00:08:41,686
IN MARCH OF 2020, WHEN KUSHNER
LEARNED 600 MILLION MASKS
COULDN'T BE DELIVERED UNTIL

265
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:44,456
LEARNED 600 MILLION MASKS
COULDN'T BE DELIVERED UNTIL
JUNE, HE THREW HIS PEN AGAINST

266
00:08:44,458 --> 00:08:46,758
COULDN'T BE DELIVERED UNTIL
JUNE, HE THREW HIS PEN AGAINST
THE WALL AND

267
00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:48,994
JUNE, HE THREW HIS PEN AGAINST
THE WALL AND
SCREAMED, YOU (  BLEEP  ) MORON,

268
00:08:48,996 --> 00:08:53,131
THE WALL AND
SCREAMED, YOU (  BLEEP  ) MORON,
WE'LL ALL BE DEAD BY JUNE.

269
00:08:53,133 --> 00:08:54,533
SCREAMED, YOU (  BLEEP  ) MORON,
WE'LL ALL BE DEAD BY JUNE.
THAT WAS IN PRIVATE.

270
00:08:54,535 --> 00:08:59,771
WE'LL ALL BE DEAD BY JUNE.
THAT WAS IN PRIVATE.
WHAT WAS HE SAYING IN PUBLIC?

271
00:08:59,773 --> 00:09:02,407
THAT WAS IN PRIVATE.
WHAT WAS HE SAYING IN PUBLIC?
>> I THINK BY JULY THE COUNTRY

272
00:09:02,409 --> 00:09:03,375
WHAT WAS HE SAYING IN PUBLIC?
>> I THINK BY JULY THE COUNTRY
IS REALLY ROCKING AGAIN.

273
00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:05,477
>> I THINK BY JULY THE COUNTRY
IS REALLY ROCKING AGAIN.
>> Stephen: IN HIS DEFENSE, HE

274
00:09:05,479 --> 00:09:07,479
IS REALLY ROCKING AGAIN.
>> Stephen: IN HIS DEFENSE, HE
THOUGHT HE WOULD NEVER BE

275
00:09:07,481 --> 00:09:09,614
>> Stephen: IN HIS DEFENSE, HE
THOUGHT HE WOULD NEVER BE
ACCOUNTABLE FOR THOSE WORDS, HE

276
00:09:09,616 --> 00:09:15,554
THOUGHT HE WOULD NEVER BE
ACCOUNTABLE FOR THOSE WORDS, HE
THOUGHT WE WOULD ALL BY DEAD BY

277
00:09:15,556 --> 00:09:15,754
ACCOUNTABLE FOR THOSE WORDS, HE
THOUGHT WE WOULD ALL BY DEAD BY
JUNE.

278
00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:16,454
THOUGHT WE WOULD ALL BY DEAD BY
JUNE.
OH, THERE'S SOME HUGE NEWS OUT

279
00:09:16,456 --> 00:09:18,390
JUNE.
OH, THERE'S SOME HUGE NEWS OUT
THE CATHOLIC CHURCH: THE BAKE

280
00:09:18,392 --> 00:09:18,924
OH, THERE'S SOME HUGE NEWS OUT
THE CATHOLIC CHURCH: THE BAKE
SALE SATURDAY AFTER THE 4

281
00:09:18,926 --> 00:09:20,458
THE CATHOLIC CHURCH: THE BAKE
SALE SATURDAY AFTER THE 4
O'CLOCK VIGIL MASS RAISED $174

282
00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:21,359
SALE SATURDAY AFTER THE 4
O'CLOCK VIGIL MASS RAISED $174
FOR THE KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS

283
00:09:21,361 --> 00:09:24,429
O'CLOCK VIGIL MASS RAISED $174
FOR THE KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS
GOOD JOB, GUYS.

284
00:09:24,431 --> 00:09:27,332
FOR THE KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS
GOOD JOB, GUYS.
( LAUGHTER )

285
00:09:27,334 --> 00:09:27,566
GOOD JOB, GUYS.
( LAUGHTER )
ALSO --

286
00:09:27,568 --> 00:09:28,433
( LAUGHTER )
ALSO --
( LAUGHTER )

287
00:09:28,435 --> 00:09:30,135
ALSO --
( LAUGHTER )
THE U.S. CONFERENCE OF

288
00:09:30,137 --> 00:09:30,769
( LAUGHTER )
THE U.S. CONFERENCE OF
CATHOLIC BISHOPS VOTED TO

289
00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:32,437
THE U.S. CONFERENCE OF
CATHOLIC BISHOPS VOTED TO
ADVANCE A PROPOSAL THAT WOULD

290
00:09:32,439 --> 00:09:35,173
CATHOLIC BISHOPS VOTED TO
ADVANCE A PROPOSAL THAT WOULD
DENY PRESIDENT BIDEN COMMUNION.

291
00:09:35,175 --> 00:09:35,440
ADVANCE A PROPOSAL THAT WOULD
DENY PRESIDENT BIDEN COMMUNION.
( BOOING )

292
00:09:35,442 --> 00:09:39,377
DENY PRESIDENT BIDEN COMMUNION.
( BOOING )
YEP, THEY'RE HOLY GHOSTING HIM.

293
00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:41,613
( BOOING )
YEP, THEY'RE HOLY GHOSTING HIM.
( LAUGHTER )

294
00:09:41,615 --> 00:09:42,013
YEP, THEY'RE HOLY GHOSTING HIM.
( LAUGHTER )
( RIM SHOT )

295
00:09:42,015 --> 00:09:42,881
( LAUGHTER )
( RIM SHOT )
THANK YOU.

296
00:09:42,883 --> 00:09:47,118
( RIM SHOT )
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.

297
00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:47,719
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.
NOW, LISTEN, I'M CATHOLIC BUT

298
00:09:47,721 --> 00:09:49,721
THANK YOU.
NOW, LISTEN, I'M CATHOLIC BUT
BIDEN IS "SO" CATHOLIC!

299
00:09:49,723 --> 00:09:52,457
NOW, LISTEN, I'M CATHOLIC BUT
BIDEN IS "SO" CATHOLIC!
HE'S THE ONLY GUEST I'VE EVER

300
00:09:52,459 --> 00:09:53,325
BIDEN IS "SO" CATHOLIC!
HE'S THE ONLY GUEST I'VE EVER
SPENT TIME WITH BACKSTAGE

301
00:09:53,327 --> 00:09:55,293
HE'S THE ONLY GUEST I'VE EVER
SPENT TIME WITH BACKSTAGE
TALKING ABOUT THE CONSOLATIONS

302
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:56,461
SPENT TIME WITH BACKSTAGE
TALKING ABOUT THE CONSOLATIONS
OF GOD AND THE NEED FOR DAILY

303
00:09:56,463 --> 00:10:03,368
TALKING ABOUT THE CONSOLATIONS
OF GOD AND THE NEED FOR DAILY
ROSARY.

304
00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:04,436
OF GOD AND THE NEED FOR DAILY
ROSARY.
SO FAR,  BALL'S IN YOUR COURT,

305
00:10:04,438 --> 00:10:05,570
ROSARY.
SO FAR,  BALL'S IN YOUR COURT,
ANDREW GARFIELD.

306
00:10:05,572 --> 00:10:08,440
SO FAR,  BALL'S IN YOUR COURT,
ANDREW GARFIELD.
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO WERE RAISED

307
00:10:08,442 --> 00:10:10,408
ANDREW GARFIELD.
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO WERE RAISED
SLEEPING IN ON SUNDAYS,

308
00:10:10,410 --> 00:10:11,209
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO WERE RAISED
SLEEPING IN ON SUNDAYS,
COMMUNION IS THE MOST IMPORTANT

309
00:10:11,211 --> 00:10:12,143
SLEEPING IN ON SUNDAYS,
COMMUNION IS THE MOST IMPORTANT
SACRAMENT FOR CATHOLICS.

310
00:10:12,145 --> 00:10:12,711
COMMUNION IS THE MOST IMPORTANT
SACRAMENT FOR CATHOLICS.
IT GOES COMMUNION, BAPTISM,

311
00:10:12,713 --> 00:10:14,546
SACRAMENT FOR CATHOLICS.
IT GOES COMMUNION, BAPTISM,
HANGING THE FREE CHURCH CALENDAR

312
00:10:14,548 --> 00:10:15,347
IT GOES COMMUNION, BAPTISM,
HANGING THE FREE CHURCH CALENDAR
IN YOUR KITCHEN.

313
00:10:15,349 --> 00:10:20,919
HANGING THE FREE CHURCH CALENDAR
IN YOUR KITCHEN.
"OOH, I WONDER WHO'S MR.

314
00:10:20,921 --> 00:10:21,453
IN YOUR KITCHEN.
"OOH, I WONDER WHO'S MR.
FEBRUARY... JESUS

315
00:10:21,455 --> 00:10:24,422
"OOH, I WONDER WHO'S MR.
FEBRUARY... JESUS
AGAIN?!

316
00:10:24,424 --> 00:10:27,525
FEBRUARY... JESUS
AGAIN?!
THE STREAK CONTINUES."

317
00:10:27,527 --> 00:10:32,397
AGAIN?!
THE STREAK CONTINUES."
SO WHY DENY BIDEN THE SACRAMENT?

318
00:10:32,399 --> 00:10:33,164
THE STREAK CONTINUES."
SO WHY DENY BIDEN THE SACRAMENT?
WELL, APPARENTLY, THESE BISHOPS

319
00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:33,565
SO WHY DENY BIDEN THE SACRAMENT?
WELL, APPARENTLY, THESE BISHOPS
WANT TO PUNISH HIM

320
00:10:33,567 --> 00:10:34,399
WELL, APPARENTLY, THESE BISHOPS
WANT TO PUNISH HIM
BECAUSE THE PRESIDENT SAYS HE

321
00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:35,100
WANT TO PUNISH HIM
BECAUSE THE PRESIDENT SAYS HE
PERSONALLY OPPOSES ABORTION BUT

322
00:10:35,102 --> 00:10:35,667
BECAUSE THE PRESIDENT SAYS HE
PERSONALLY OPPOSES ABORTION BUT
DOESNT THINK HE SHOUL IMPOSE

323
00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:36,401
PERSONALLY OPPOSES ABORTION BUT
DOESNT THINK HE SHOUL IMPOSE
THAT POSITION ON AMERICANS WHO

324
00:10:36,403 --> 00:10:39,404
DOESNT THINK HE SHOUL IMPOSE
THAT POSITION ON AMERICANS WHO
FEEL OTHERWISE.

325
00:10:39,406 --> 00:10:45,377
THAT POSITION ON AMERICANS WHO
FEEL OTHERWISE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

326
00:10:45,379 --> 00:10:46,011
FEEL OTHERWISE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
BUT I'M NOT SURE HOW SERIOUS THE

327
00:10:46,013 --> 00:10:48,446
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
BUT I'M NOT SURE HOW SERIOUS THE
BISHOPS ARE HERE.

328
00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:50,815
BUT I'M NOT SURE HOW SERIOUS THE
BISHOPS ARE HERE.
IF THEY REALLY WANTED TO PUNISH

329
00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:51,383
BISHOPS ARE HERE.
IF THEY REALLY WANTED TO PUNISH
BIDEN, THEY'D MOVE HIM TO A

330
00:10:51,385 --> 00:10:51,983
IF THEY REALLY WANTED TO PUNISH
BIDEN, THEY'D MOVE HIM TO A
DIFFERENT PARISH, AND NOT TELL

331
00:10:51,985 --> 00:10:56,454
BIDEN, THEY'D MOVE HIM TO A
DIFFERENT PARISH, AND NOT TELL
ANYONE WHY THEY DID IT.

332
00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:57,389
DIFFERENT PARISH, AND NOT TELL
ANYONE WHY THEY DID IT.
( LAUGHTER )

333
00:10:57,391 --> 00:11:00,959
ANYONE WHY THEY DID IT.
( LAUGHTER )
( BOOING )

334
00:11:00,961 --> 00:11:03,395
( LAUGHTER )
( BOOING )
JOKE'S BASED ON A TRUE STORY.

335
00:11:03,397 --> 00:11:04,262
( BOOING )
JOKE'S BASED ON A TRUE STORY.
( LAUGHTER )

336
00:11:04,264 --> 00:11:04,896
JOKE'S BASED ON A TRUE STORY.
( LAUGHTER )
THIS IS A BIG DEAL FOR A LOT OF

337
00:11:04,898 --> 00:11:05,263
( LAUGHTER )
THIS IS A BIG DEAL FOR A LOT OF
REASONS.

338
00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:06,698
THIS IS A BIG DEAL FOR A LOT OF
REASONS.
ONE OF WHICH IS THAT BIDEN IS

339
00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:07,332
REASONS.
ONE OF WHICH IS THAT BIDEN IS
ONLY THE SECOND CATHOLIC TO

340
00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,400
ONE OF WHICH IS THAT BIDEN IS
ONLY THE SECOND CATHOLIC TO
OCCUPY THE WHITE HOUSE AFTER

341
00:11:08,402 --> 00:11:11,970
ONLY THE SECOND CATHOLIC TO
OCCUPY THE WHITE HOUSE AFTER
JOHN KENNEDY.

342
00:11:11,972 --> 00:11:12,537
OCCUPY THE WHITE HOUSE AFTER
JOHN KENNEDY.
BUT J.F.K. WAS NEVER DENIED

343
00:11:12,539 --> 00:11:13,571
JOHN KENNEDY.
BUT J.F.K. WAS NEVER DENIED
COMMUNION BECAUSE HE ALWAYS WENT

344
00:11:13,573 --> 00:11:15,407
BUT J.F.K. WAS NEVER DENIED
COMMUNION BECAUSE HE ALWAYS WENT
TO CONFESSION AFTER BANGING

345
00:11:15,409 --> 00:11:20,478
COMMUNION BECAUSE HE ALWAYS WENT
TO CONFESSION AFTER BANGING
MARILYN MONROE.

346
00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:21,379
TO CONFESSION AFTER BANGING
MARILYN MONROE.
( LAUGHTER )

347
00:11:21,381 --> 00:11:23,581
MARILYN MONROE.
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )

348
00:11:23,583 --> 00:11:27,385
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
NOW -- BASED ON A TRUE STORY.

349
00:11:27,387 --> 00:11:28,453
( APPLAUSE )
NOW -- BASED ON A TRUE STORY.
( LAUGHTER )

350
00:11:28,455 --> 00:11:29,087
NOW -- BASED ON A TRUE STORY.
( LAUGHTER )
HERE IN NEW YORK, THERE'S A BIG

351
00:11:29,089 --> 00:11:32,457
( LAUGHTER )
HERE IN NEW YORK, THERE'S A BIG
ELECTION TOMORROW.

352
00:11:32,459 --> 00:11:33,391
HERE IN NEW YORK, THERE'S A BIG
ELECTION TOMORROW.
THE CITY WILL BE CHOOSING A NEW

353
00:11:33,393 --> 00:11:36,461
ELECTION TOMORROW.
THE CITY WILL BE CHOOSING A NEW
MAYOR THAT MANY ARE CALLING,

354
00:11:36,463 --> 00:11:38,363
THE CITY WILL BE CHOOSING A NEW
MAYOR THAT MANY ARE CALLING,
"NOT BILL DEBLASIO."

355
00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:38,863
MAYOR THAT MANY ARE CALLING,
"NOT BILL DEBLASIO."
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

356
00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:39,531
"NOT BILL DEBLASIO."
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
NEW YORK WILL ALSO BE ELECTING A

357
00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:40,432
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
NEW YORK WILL ALSO BE ELECTING A
NEW CITY COUNCIL.

358
00:11:40,434 --> 00:11:42,333
NEW YORK WILL ALSO BE ELECTING A
NEW CITY COUNCIL.
AND THERE'S SOME SHOCKING NEWS

359
00:11:42,335 --> 00:11:44,102
NEW CITY COUNCIL.
AND THERE'S SOME SHOCKING NEWS
OUT OF THAT RACE BECAUSE

360
00:11:44,104 --> 00:11:44,736
AND THERE'S SOME SHOCKING NEWS
OUT OF THAT RACE BECAUSE
MANHATTAN CANDIDATE ZACK WIENER

361
00:11:44,738 --> 00:11:47,572
OUT OF THAT RACE BECAUSE
MANHATTAN CANDIDATE ZACK WIENER
WAS CAUGHT WITH A DOMINATRIX,

362
00:11:47,574 --> 00:11:48,406
MANHATTAN CANDIDATE ZACK WIENER
WAS CAUGHT WITH A DOMINATRIX,
GAGGED AND ENJOYING A

363
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:56,047
WAS CAUGHT WITH A DOMINATRIX,
GAGGED AND ENJOYING A
SADOMASOCHISM SESSION.

364
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:56,347
GAGGED AND ENJOYING A
SADOMASOCHISM SESSION.
( LAUGHTER )

365
00:11:56,349 --> 00:11:56,648
SADOMASOCHISM SESSION.
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )

366
00:11:56,650 --> 00:11:57,382
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
REACHED FOR COMMENT, THE

367
00:11:57,384 --> 00:12:00,351
( APPLAUSE )
REACHED FOR COMMENT, THE
CANDIDATE SAID

368
00:12:00,353 --> 00:12:03,388
REACHED FOR COMMENT, THE
CANDIDATE SAID
"ERRMMMUUH.

369
00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:05,457
CANDIDATE SAID
"ERRMMMUUH.
TERGGRAAGLLL. RRAHHH."

370
00:12:05,459 --> 00:12:06,091
"ERRMMMUUH.
TERGGRAAGLLL. RRAHHH."
THAT TOOK COURAGE.

371
00:12:06,093 --> 00:12:06,391
TERGGRAAGLLL. RRAHHH."
THAT TOOK COURAGE.
( LAUGHTER )

372
00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:09,394
THAT TOOK COURAGE.
( LAUGHTER )
THAT TOOK A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF

373
00:12:09,396 --> 00:12:12,130
( LAUGHTER )
THAT TOOK A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF
COURAGE.

374
00:12:12,132 --> 00:12:12,630
THAT TOOK A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF
COURAGE.
IT ALL CAME OUT WHEN AN

375
00:12:12,632 --> 00:12:15,400
COURAGE.
IT ALL CAME OUT WHEN AN
ANONYMOUS TWITTER

376
00:12:15,402 --> 00:12:16,401
IT ALL CAME OUT WHEN AN
ANONYMOUS TWITTER
USER POSTED A VIDEO OF WEINER

377
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:18,803
ANONYMOUS TWITTER
USER POSTED A VIDEO OF WEINER
AND A LEATHER-BOUND WOMAN WHO

378
00:12:18,805 --> 00:12:19,404
USER POSTED A VIDEO OF WEINER
AND A LEATHER-BOUND WOMAN WHO
POURS WAX ON HIM AND CLIPS HIS

379
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:22,574
AND A LEATHER-BOUND WOMAN WHO
POURS WAX ON HIM AND CLIPS HIS
NIPPLES WITH CLOTHESPINS.

380
00:12:22,576 --> 00:12:24,342
POURS WAX ON HIM AND CLIPS HIS
NIPPLES WITH CLOTHESPINS.
POURED HOT WAX ON HIM?

381
00:12:24,344 --> 00:12:24,843
NIPPLES WITH CLOTHESPINS.
POURED HOT WAX ON HIM?
EVIDENTLY, HE HAS A VERY

382
00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,412
POURED HOT WAX ON HIM?
EVIDENTLY, HE HAS A VERY
SPECIFIC FANTASY ABOUT BECOMING

383
00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:30,315
EVIDENTLY, HE HAS A VERY
SPECIFIC FANTASY ABOUT BECOMING
A WHEEL OF GOUDA.

384
00:12:30,317 --> 00:12:30,615
SPECIFIC FANTASY ABOUT BECOMING
A WHEEL OF GOUDA.
( LAUGHTER )

385
00:12:30,617 --> 00:12:31,649
A WHEEL OF GOUDA.
( LAUGHTER )
THAT'S THE ONE THAT HAS THE WAX

386
00:12:31,651 --> 00:12:33,318
( LAUGHTER )
THAT'S THE ONE THAT HAS THE WAX
ON IT.

387
00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:33,518
THAT'S THE ONE THAT HAS THE WAX
ON IT.
OKAY.

388
00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:36,020
ON IT.
OKAY.
HOT BLACK WAX.

389
00:12:36,022 --> 00:12:36,621
OKAY.
HOT BLACK WAX.
AFTER THE VIDEO LEAKED, WEINER

390
00:12:36,623 --> 00:12:37,555
HOT BLACK WAX.
AFTER THE VIDEO LEAKED, WEINER
RESPONDED: "I DIDN'T WANT ANYONE

391
00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:40,425
AFTER THE VIDEO LEAKED, WEINER
RESPONDED: "I DIDN'T WANT ANYONE
TO SEE THAT, BUT HERE

392
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,060
RESPONDED: "I DIDN'T WANT ANYONE
TO SEE THAT, BUT HERE
WE ARE.

393
00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:42,694
TO SEE THAT, BUT HERE
WE ARE.
I AM NOT ASHAMED OF THE PRIVATE

394
00:12:42,696 --> 00:12:44,429
WE ARE.
I AM NOT ASHAMED OF THE PRIVATE
VIDEO CIRCULATING OF ME ON

395
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:49,734
I AM NOT ASHAMED OF THE PRIVATE
VIDEO CIRCULATING OF ME ON
TWITTER."

396
00:12:49,736 --> 00:12:51,402
VIDEO CIRCULATING OF ME ON
TWITTER."
NOR SHOULD HE BE!

397
00:12:51,404 --> 00:12:52,437
TWITTER."
NOR SHOULD HE BE!
THE LATE SHOW IS SEXPOSITIVE,

398
00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:56,441
NOR SHOULD HE BE!
THE LATE SHOW IS SEXPOSITIVE,
AND WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY KINK

399
00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:57,408
THE LATE SHOW IS SEXPOSITIVE,
AND WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY KINK
SHAMING, UNLESS YOU "LIKE"

400
00:12:57,410 --> 00:12:57,976
AND WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY KINK
SHAMING, UNLESS YOU "LIKE"
HAVING YOUR KINK SHAMED, IN

401
00:12:57,978 --> 00:12:59,344
SHAMING, UNLESS YOU "LIKE"
HAVING YOUR KINK SHAMED, IN
WHICH CASE:

402
00:12:59,346 --> 00:13:00,445
HAVING YOUR KINK SHAMED, IN
WHICH CASE:
BAD CANDIDATE!

403
00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:06,117
WHICH CASE:
BAD CANDIDATE!
NAUGHTY BOY!

404
00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,652
BAD CANDIDATE!
NAUGHTY BOY!
( LAUGHTER )

405
00:13:07,654 --> 00:13:08,153
NAUGHTY BOY!
( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

406
00:13:08,155 --> 00:13:09,387
( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: NOW, YOU MAY NOT

407
00:13:09,389 --> 00:13:12,457
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: NOW, YOU MAY NOT
HAVE HEARD OF

408
00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:13,091
>> Stephen: NOW, YOU MAY NOT
HAVE HEARD OF
ZACK BEFORE, BUT HIS FATHER IS A

409
00:13:13,093 --> 00:13:14,926
HAVE HEARD OF
ZACK BEFORE, BUT HIS FATHER IS A
CO-CREATOR OF THE POPULAR

410
00:13:14,928 --> 00:13:15,560
ZACK BEFORE, BUT HIS FATHER IS A
CO-CREATOR OF THE POPULAR
CHILDREN'S TELEVISION SHOW "DORA

411
00:13:15,562 --> 00:13:19,764
CO-CREATOR OF THE POPULAR
CHILDREN'S TELEVISION SHOW "DORA
THE EXPLORER."

412
00:13:19,766 --> 00:13:20,398
CHILDREN'S TELEVISION SHOW "DORA
THE EXPLORER."
WHEREAS HIS SON CREATED THE LESS

413
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:21,366
THE EXPLORER."
WHEREAS HIS SON CREATED THE LESS
POPULAR SPIN OFF:

414
00:13:21,368 --> 00:13:25,003
WHEREAS HIS SON CREATED THE LESS
POPULAR SPIN OFF:
"MARIAN THE DISCIPLINARIAN."

415
00:13:25,005 --> 00:13:25,970
POPULAR SPIN OFF:
"MARIAN THE DISCIPLINARIAN."
( APPLAUSE )

416
00:13:25,972 --> 00:13:29,240
"MARIAN THE DISCIPLINARIAN."
( APPLAUSE )
WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU

417
00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:29,841
( APPLAUSE )
WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT.

418
00:13:29,843 --> 00:13:33,611
WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT.
OUR GUESTS ARE AROUND AND AND

419
00:13:33,613 --> 00:13:34,245
TONIGHT.
OUR GUESTS ARE AROUND AND AND
LORDE.

420
00:13:34,247 --> 00:13:36,147
OUR GUESTS ARE AROUND AND AND
LORDE.
WHEN WHEY COME BACK, THE SCOOP

421
00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:39,317
LORDE.
WHEN WHEY COME BACK, THE SCOOP
ON THE CAST OF SEASON TWO OF

422
00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:39,651
WHEN WHEY COME BACK, THE SCOOP
ON THE CAST OF SEASON TWO OF
"BRIDGERTON."

423
00:13:39,653 --> 00:13:40,451
ON THE CAST OF SEASON TWO OF
"BRIDGERTON."
STICK AROUND!

424
00:13:40,453 --> 00:13:41,853
"BRIDGERTON."
STICK AROUND!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

425
00:13:41,855 --> 00:13:44,422
STICK AROUND!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪♪

426
00:14:05,077 --> 00:14:18,523
♪♪
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WELCOME BACK!

427
00:14:18,525 --> 00:14:20,091
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WELCOME BACK!
GIVE IT UP FOR JON BATISTE AND

428
00:14:20,093 --> 00:14:23,962
WELCOME BACK!
GIVE IT UP FOR JON BATISTE AND
"STAY HUMAN," EVERYBODY!

429
00:14:23,964 --> 00:14:27,198
GIVE IT UP FOR JON BATISTE AND
"STAY HUMAN," EVERYBODY!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

430
00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:28,967
"STAY HUMAN," EVERYBODY!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --

431
00:14:28,969 --> 00:14:31,970
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

432
00:14:31,972 --> 00:14:32,704
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --

433
00:14:32,706 --> 00:14:34,906
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --
>> Jon: WOO-HOO!

434
00:14:34,908 --> 00:14:38,443
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --
>> Jon: WOO-HOO!
>> Stephen: FOLKS, WORKING IN

435
00:14:38,445 --> 00:14:39,177
>> Jon: WOO-HOO!
>> Stephen: FOLKS, WORKING IN
TELEVISION IS A GREAT PRIVILEGE,

436
00:14:39,179 --> 00:14:40,845
>> Stephen: FOLKS, WORKING IN
TELEVISION IS A GREAT PRIVILEGE,
AND I DO IT BECAUSE I LOVE IT,

437
00:14:40,847 --> 00:14:41,446
TELEVISION IS A GREAT PRIVILEGE,
AND I DO IT BECAUSE I LOVE IT,
NOT TO WIN SOME FANCY AWARD...

438
00:14:41,448 --> 00:14:45,016
AND I DO IT BECAUSE I LOVE IT,
NOT TO WIN SOME FANCY AWARD...
IS WHAT I WOULD HAVE SAID

439
00:14:45,018 --> 00:14:47,719
NOT TO WIN SOME FANCY AWARD...
IS WHAT I WOULD HAVE SAID
YESTERDAY.

440
00:14:47,721 --> 00:14:48,019
IS WHAT I WOULD HAVE SAID
YESTERDAY.
( LAUGHTER )

441
00:14:48,021 --> 00:14:52,090
YESTERDAY.
( LAUGHTER )
BUT TODAY, I'M ALL ABOUT THAT

442
00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:52,690
( LAUGHTER )
BUT TODAY, I'M ALL ABOUT THAT
BLING, BECAUSE "THE LATE SHOW

443
00:14:52,692 --> 00:14:53,291
BUT TODAY, I'M ALL ABOUT THAT
BLING, BECAUSE "THE LATE SHOW
WITH STEPHEN COLBERT" JUST WON

444
00:14:53,293 --> 00:14:56,995
BLING, BECAUSE "THE LATE SHOW
WITH STEPHEN COLBERT" JUST WON
A 2021 PEABODY AWARD!

445
00:14:56,997 --> 00:15:03,234
WITH STEPHEN COLBERT" JUST WON
A 2021 PEABODY AWARD!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

446
00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:03,568
A 2021 PEABODY AWARD!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪

447
00:15:03,570 --> 00:15:03,768
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪
♪♪

448
00:15:03,770 --> 00:15:05,003
♪♪
♪♪
>> Stephen: COME ON, COME ON.

449
00:15:05,005 --> 00:15:07,038
♪♪
>> Stephen: COME ON, COME ON.
>> Jon: HELLO!

450
00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:08,239
>> Stephen: COME ON, COME ON.
>> Jon: HELLO!
( AUDIENCE CHANTING STEPHEN )

451
00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:10,541
>> Jon: HELLO!
( AUDIENCE CHANTING STEPHEN )
>> Stephen: THANK YOU!

452
00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:11,943
( AUDIENCE CHANTING STEPHEN )
>> Stephen: THANK YOU!
THANK YOU!

453
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:13,011
>> Stephen: THANK YOU!
THANK YOU!
INCREDIBLE CROWD.

454
00:15:13,013 --> 00:15:13,711
THANK YOU!
INCREDIBLE CROWD.
INCREDIBLE CROWD.

455
00:15:13,713 --> 00:15:16,881
INCREDIBLE CROWD.
INCREDIBLE CROWD.
THANK YOU TO THE PEABODY

456
00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:17,482
INCREDIBLE CROWD.
THANK YOU TO THE PEABODY
COMMITTEE FOR THIS TREMENDOUS

457
00:15:17,484 --> 00:15:20,985
THANK YOU TO THE PEABODY
COMMITTEE FOR THIS TREMENDOUS
HONOR.

458
00:15:20,987 --> 00:15:22,520
COMMITTEE FOR THIS TREMENDOUS
HONOR.
TO MAKE THE MOMENT EVEN SWEETER,

459
00:15:22,522 --> 00:15:23,421
HONOR.
TO MAKE THE MOMENT EVEN SWEETER,
THE PERSON WHO PRESENTED US THE

460
00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:23,988
TO MAKE THE MOMENT EVEN SWEETER,
THE PERSON WHO PRESENTED US THE
AWARD WAS NONE OTHER THAN MY

461
00:15:23,990 --> 00:15:24,989
THE PERSON WHO PRESENTED US THE
AWARD WAS NONE OTHER THAN MY
DEAR OLD FRIEND, STEVE

462
00:15:24,991 --> 00:15:27,625
AWARD WAS NONE OTHER THAN MY
DEAR OLD FRIEND, STEVE
CARELL.

463
00:15:27,627 --> 00:15:28,126
DEAR OLD FRIEND, STEVE
CARELL.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

464
00:15:28,128 --> 00:15:28,993
CARELL.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> I'VE KNOWN STEPHEN COLBERT

465
00:15:28,995 --> 00:15:29,961
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> I'VE KNOWN STEPHEN COLBERT
FOR OVER 30 YEARS.

466
00:15:29,963 --> 00:15:32,964
>> I'VE KNOWN STEPHEN COLBERT
FOR OVER 30 YEARS.
AND I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT HE'S

467
00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:35,934
FOR OVER 30 YEARS.
AND I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT HE'S
THE ONLY PEABODY AWARD WINNER

468
00:15:35,936 --> 00:15:38,803
AND I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT HE'S
THE ONLY PEABODY AWARD WINNER
WHOSE CAR I'VE THROWN UP IN."

469
00:15:38,805 --> 00:15:40,505
THE ONLY PEABODY AWARD WINNER
WHOSE CAR I'VE THROWN UP IN."
( LAUGHTER )

470
00:15:40,507 --> 00:15:41,105
WHOSE CAR I'VE THROWN UP IN."
( LAUGHTER )
>> STEPHEN: THANK YOU, STEVE.

471
00:15:41,107 --> 00:15:42,674
( LAUGHTER )
>> STEPHEN: THANK YOU, STEVE.
THANK YOU.

472
00:15:42,676 --> 00:15:45,009
>> STEPHEN: THANK YOU, STEVE.
THANK YOU.
THAT WAS INCREDIBLY NICE OF YOU

473
00:15:45,011 --> 00:15:47,278
THANK YOU.
THAT WAS INCREDIBLY NICE OF YOU
TO DO,

474
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:47,779
THAT WAS INCREDIBLY NICE OF YOU
TO DO,
BUT I'M GOING TO HAVE TO

475
00:15:47,781 --> 00:15:48,246
TO DO,
BUT I'M GOING TO HAVE TO
FACT-CHECK YOU THERE.

476
00:15:48,248 --> 00:15:49,013
BUT I'M GOING TO HAVE TO
FACT-CHECK YOU THERE.
AND THIS IS ABSOLUTELY

477
00:15:49,015 --> 00:15:50,448
FACT-CHECK YOU THERE.
AND THIS IS ABSOLUTELY
TRUE-- YOU DID THROW UP, BUT I

478
00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:53,017
AND THIS IS ABSOLUTELY
TRUE-- YOU DID THROW UP, BUT I
WAS DRIVING EVIE'S CAR THAT

479
00:15:53,019 --> 00:15:53,952
TRUE-- YOU DID THROW UP, BUT I
WAS DRIVING EVIE'S CAR THAT
NIGHT.

480
00:15:53,954 --> 00:15:55,086
WAS DRIVING EVIE'S CAR THAT
NIGHT.
( LAUGHTER )

481
00:15:55,088 --> 00:15:56,087
NIGHT.
( LAUGHTER )
SO, IT WAS EASY FOR ME TO

482
00:15:56,089 --> 00:15:56,387
( LAUGHTER )
SO, IT WAS EASY FOR ME TO
FORGIVE YOU.

483
00:15:56,389 --> 00:15:57,021
SO, IT WAS EASY FOR ME TO
FORGIVE YOU.
SHE'S STILL WORKING THROUGH HER

484
00:15:57,023 --> 00:15:59,958
FORGIVE YOU.
SHE'S STILL WORKING THROUGH HER
FEELINGS.

485
00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:00,992
SHE'S STILL WORKING THROUGH HER
FEELINGS.
( LAUGHTER )

486
00:16:00,994 --> 00:16:03,828
FEELINGS.
( LAUGHTER )
THE TRUTH IS, THE PEABODY IS THE

487
00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:04,963
( LAUGHTER )
THE TRUTH IS, THE PEABODY IS THE
BEST AWARD, AND NOT JUST BECAUSE

488
00:16:04,965 --> 00:16:08,866
THE TRUTH IS, THE PEABODY IS THE
BEST AWARD, AND NOT JUST BECAUSE
WE WON IT.

489
00:16:08,868 --> 00:16:10,401
BEST AWARD, AND NOT JUST BECAUSE
WE WON IT.
IT'S BECAUSE, UNLIKE OTHER MAJOR

490
00:16:10,403 --> 00:16:11,636
WE WON IT.
IT'S BECAUSE, UNLIKE OTHER MAJOR
AWARDS, THE PEABODY GOES

491
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:12,270
IT'S BECAUSE, UNLIKE OTHER MAJOR
AWARDS, THE PEABODY GOES
TO EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO WORKS

492
00:16:12,272 --> 00:16:13,004
AWARDS, THE PEABODY GOES
TO EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO WORKS
ON THE SHOW, WHICH IS

493
00:16:13,006 --> 00:16:15,373
TO EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO WORKS
ON THE SHOW, WHICH IS
PARTICULARLY FITTING THIS YEAR

494
00:16:15,375 --> 00:16:16,774
ON THE SHOW, WHICH IS
PARTICULARLY FITTING THIS YEAR
BECAUSE PUTTING THIS SHOW

495
00:16:16,776 --> 00:16:17,375
PARTICULARLY FITTING THIS YEAR
BECAUSE PUTTING THIS SHOW
TOGETHER TAKES OVER 200 PEOPLE

496
00:16:17,377 --> 00:16:20,545
BECAUSE PUTTING THIS SHOW
TOGETHER TAKES OVER 200 PEOPLE
WHO'VE SPENT 15 MONTHS

497
00:16:20,547 --> 00:16:21,179
TOGETHER TAKES OVER 200 PEOPLE
WHO'VE SPENT 15 MONTHS
DOING AN EXTRAORDINARY JOB UNDER

498
00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:24,482
WHO'VE SPENT 15 MONTHS
DOING AN EXTRAORDINARY JOB UNDER
EXTRAORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES

499
00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:27,385
DOING AN EXTRAORDINARY JOB UNDER
EXTRAORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

500
00:16:27,387 --> 00:16:32,957
EXTRAORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND I JUST WANT TO TAKE A MOMEN-

501
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:33,958
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND I JUST WANT TO TAKE A MOMEN-
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

502
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:35,827
AND I JUST WANT TO TAKE A MOMEN-
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
I'M THE GUY ON CAMERA.

503
00:16:35,829 --> 00:16:38,229
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
I'M THE GUY ON CAMERA.
I'M THE GUY ON CAMERA, BUT THIS

504
00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:39,330
I'M THE GUY ON CAMERA.
I'M THE GUY ON CAMERA, BUT THIS
REALLY DOES GO TO EVERYBODY, SO

505
00:16:39,332 --> 00:16:41,299
I'M THE GUY ON CAMERA, BUT THIS
REALLY DOES GO TO EVERYBODY, SO
I WANT TO THANK "THE LATE SHOW"

506
00:16:41,301 --> 00:16:42,333
REALLY DOES GO TO EVERYBODY, SO
I WANT TO THANK "THE LATE SHOW"
WRITERS AND THE STAFF AND THE

507
00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:47,839
I WANT TO THANK "THE LATE SHOW"
WRITERS AND THE STAFF AND THE
CREW AND THE BAND.

508
00:16:47,841 --> 00:16:48,339
WRITERS AND THE STAFF AND THE
CREW AND THE BAND.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

509
00:16:48,341 --> 00:16:53,978
CREW AND THE BAND.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
I'M LUCKY TO WORK WITH YOU.

510
00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:56,948
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
I'M LUCKY TO WORK WITH YOU.
THANKS.

511
00:16:56,950 --> 00:17:03,221
I'M LUCKY TO WORK WITH YOU.
THANKS.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

512
00:17:03,223 --> 00:17:04,589
THANKS.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
NOW, IT'S BEEN A LONG, DIVISIVE

513
00:17:04,591 --> 00:17:05,123
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
NOW, IT'S BEEN A LONG, DIVISIVE
YEAR, BUT, THROUGH IT ALL,

514
00:17:05,125 --> 00:17:05,656
NOW, IT'S BEEN A LONG, DIVISIVE
YEAR, BUT, THROUGH IT ALL,
AMERICANS STAYED COMMITTED

515
00:17:05,658 --> 00:17:06,257
YEAR, BUT, THROUGH IT ALL,
AMERICANS STAYED COMMITTED
TO THE ONE VALUE WE ALL SHARE:

516
00:17:06,259 --> 00:17:09,460
AMERICANS STAYED COMMITTED
TO THE ONE VALUE WE ALL SHARE:
BINGE-ING TV.

517
00:17:09,462 --> 00:17:09,761
TO THE ONE VALUE WE ALL SHARE:
BINGE-ING TV.
( LAUGHTER )

518
00:17:09,763 --> 00:17:11,596
BINGE-ING TV.
( LAUGHTER )
AND PERHAPS NO SHOW WAS BIGGER

519
00:17:11,598 --> 00:17:12,997
( LAUGHTER )
AND PERHAPS NO SHOW WAS BIGGER
THAN BRIDGERTON, SHONDA RHIMES'

520
00:17:12,999 --> 00:17:16,434
AND PERHAPS NO SHOW WAS BIGGER
THAN BRIDGERTON, SHONDA RHIMES'
RESTORATION-ERA FANTASY.

521
00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:16,968
THAN BRIDGERTON, SHONDA RHIMES'
RESTORATION-ERA FANTASY.
IT PROVES NO MATTER THE

522
00:17:16,970 --> 00:17:17,969
RESTORATION-ERA FANTASY.
IT PROVES NO MATTER THE
OBSTACLES, IT IS POSSIBLE FOR

523
00:17:17,971 --> 00:17:21,005
IT PROVES NO MATTER THE
OBSTACLES, IT IS POSSIBLE FOR
EXTREMELY ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE TO

524
00:17:21,007 --> 00:17:23,508
OBSTACLES, IT IS POSSIBLE FOR
EXTREMELY ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE TO
HAVE SEX.

525
00:17:23,510 --> 00:17:23,975
EXTREMELY ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE TO
HAVE SEX.
( LAUGHTER )

526
00:17:23,977 --> 00:17:25,009
HAVE SEX.
( LAUGHTER )
OF COURSE, THE BREAKOUT STAR OF

527
00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:27,678
( LAUGHTER )
OF COURSE, THE BREAKOUT STAR OF
THE SHOW WAS ROMANTIC LEAD

528
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:29,013
OF COURSE, THE BREAKOUT STAR OF
THE SHOW WAS ROMANTIC LEAD
REGGE-JEAN PAGE, WHO PLAYED THE

529
00:17:29,015 --> 00:17:29,981
THE SHOW WAS ROMANTIC LEAD
REGGE-JEAN PAGE, WHO PLAYED THE
DUKE OF HASTINGS.

530
00:17:29,983 --> 00:17:33,017
REGGE-JEAN PAGE, WHO PLAYED THE
DUKE OF HASTINGS.
THE MAN IS A TRIPLE THREAT:

531
00:17:33,019 --> 00:17:35,920
DUKE OF HASTINGS.
THE MAN IS A TRIPLE THREAT:
ACTING, LEFT CHEEK, RIGHT CHEEK.

532
00:17:35,922 --> 00:17:38,790
THE MAN IS A TRIPLE THREAT:
ACTING, LEFT CHEEK, RIGHT CHEEK.
THAT'S WHY IT WAS SUCH A SHOCK

533
00:17:38,792 --> 00:17:39,791
ACTING, LEFT CHEEK, RIGHT CHEEK.
THAT'S WHY IT WAS SUCH A SHOCK
WHEN THE SHOW ANNOUNCED THAT

534
00:17:39,793 --> 00:17:40,291
THAT'S WHY IT WAS SUCH A SHOCK
WHEN THE SHOW ANNOUNCED THAT
PAGE WILL NOT APPEAR IN

535
00:17:40,293 --> 00:17:40,691
WHEN THE SHOW ANNOUNCED THAT
PAGE WILL NOT APPEAR IN
BRIDGERTON SEASON

536
00:17:40,693 --> 00:17:44,562
PAGE WILL NOT APPEAR IN
BRIDGERTON SEASON
TWO.

537
00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:44,996
BRIDGERTON SEASON
TWO.
( AUDIENCE REACTS )

538
00:17:44,998 --> 00:17:45,930
TWO.
( AUDIENCE REACTS )
HEARTBREAKING.

539
00:17:45,932 --> 00:17:46,697
( AUDIENCE REACTS )
HEARTBREAKING.
THOUGH, IF YOU'VE SEEN THE

540
00:17:46,699 --> 00:17:47,932
HEARTBREAKING.
THOUGH, IF YOU'VE SEEN THE
SHOW, YOU CAN'T BE SURPRISED

541
00:17:47,934 --> 00:17:51,769
THOUGH, IF YOU'VE SEEN THE
SHOW, YOU CAN'T BE SURPRISED
WHEN THIS GUY PULLS OUT.

542
00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:52,070
SHOW, YOU CAN'T BE SURPRISED
WHEN THIS GUY PULLS OUT.
( LAUGHTER )

543
00:17:52,072 --> 00:17:55,706
WHEN THIS GUY PULLS OUT.
( LAUGHTER )
SOME PEOPLE HAVE WATCHED IT.

544
00:17:55,708 --> 00:17:57,575
( LAUGHTER )
SOME PEOPLE HAVE WATCHED IT.
NO SPOILERS.

545
00:17:57,577 --> 00:17:57,875
SOME PEOPLE HAVE WATCHED IT.
NO SPOILERS.
( LAUGHTER )

546
00:17:57,877 --> 00:17:59,077
NO SPOILERS.
( LAUGHTER )
THIS NEWS HAS LEFT SOME OF THE

547
00:17:59,079 --> 00:17:59,710
( LAUGHTER )
THIS NEWS HAS LEFT SOME OF THE
SHOW'S DEVOTED FANS OUTRAGED AND

548
00:17:59,712 --> 00:18:01,012
THIS NEWS HAS LEFT SOME OF THE
SHOW'S DEVOTED FANS OUTRAGED AND
THREATENING THAT "IF HE'S NOT

549
00:18:01,014 --> 00:18:03,848
SHOW'S DEVOTED FANS OUTRAGED AND
THREATENING THAT "IF HE'S NOT
IN, I'M NOT WATCHING."

550
00:18:03,850 --> 00:18:04,982
THREATENING THAT "IF HE'S NOT
IN, I'M NOT WATCHING."
BUT TAKE HEART, DEAR

551
00:18:04,984 --> 00:18:05,950
IN, I'M NOT WATCHING."
BUT TAKE HEART, DEAR
BRIDGER-HEADS.

552
00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:08,152
BUT TAKE HEART, DEAR
BRIDGER-HEADS.
FOR PRODUCTION ON THE NEW SEASON

553
00:18:08,154 --> 00:18:08,986
BRIDGER-HEADS.
FOR PRODUCTION ON THE NEW SEASON
IS UNDER WAY, AND SHONDA RHIMES

554
00:18:08,988 --> 00:18:11,923
FOR PRODUCTION ON THE NEW SEASON
IS UNDER WAY, AND SHONDA RHIMES
HAS ADDED A NEW CAST MEMBER WHO

555
00:18:11,925 --> 00:18:15,326
IS UNDER WAY, AND SHONDA RHIMES
HAS ADDED A NEW CAST MEMBER WHO
PROMISES TO KEEP THINGS AS

556
00:18:15,328 --> 00:18:16,994
HAS ADDED A NEW CAST MEMBER WHO
PROMISES TO KEEP THINGS AS
STEAMY AS EVER.

557
00:18:16,996 --> 00:18:17,829
PROMISES TO KEEP THINGS AS
STEAMY AS EVER.
THE LATE SHOW HAS ACQUIRED A

558
00:18:17,831 --> 00:18:18,162
STEAMY AS EVER.
THE LATE SHOW HAS ACQUIRED A
SNEAK PREVIEW.

559
00:18:18,164 --> 00:18:19,597
THE LATE SHOW HAS ACQUIRED A
SNEAK PREVIEW.
JIM?

560
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:20,364
SNEAK PREVIEW.
JIM?
>> LAST MARRIAGE SEASON, LONDON

561
00:18:20,366 --> 00:18:20,898
JIM?
>> LAST MARRIAGE SEASON, LONDON
LEARNED THE ONE THING THAT

562
00:18:20,900 --> 00:18:21,099
>> LAST MARRIAGE SEASON, LONDON
LEARNED THE ONE THING THAT
CANNOT

563
00:18:21,101 --> 00:18:23,968
LEARNED THE ONE THING THAT
CANNOT
BE ARRANGED... IS LOVE.

564
00:18:23,970 --> 00:18:29,006
CANNOT
BE ARRANGED... IS LOVE.
AND WHILE WE BID ADIEU TO ONE WE

565
00:18:29,008 --> 00:18:29,974
BE ARRANGED... IS LOVE.
AND WHILE WE BID ADIEU TO ONE WE
BURNED FOR, A NEW LORD HAS

566
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:35,880
AND WHILE WE BID ADIEU TO ONE WE
BURNED FOR, A NEW LORD HAS
ARRIVED TO SET HEARTS AFLAME.

567
00:18:35,882 --> 00:18:36,347
BURNED FOR, A NEW LORD HAS
ARRIVED TO SET HEARTS AFLAME.
>> IT'S ME, LORD SEXY!

568
00:18:36,349 --> 00:18:37,014
ARRIVED TO SET HEARTS AFLAME.
>> IT'S ME, LORD SEXY!
SHALL WE HUMP IN MY STUDY YOUR

569
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:38,416
>> IT'S ME, LORD SEXY!
SHALL WE HUMP IN MY STUDY YOUR
GRACE?

570
00:18:38,418 --> 00:18:40,985
SHALL WE HUMP IN MY STUDY YOUR
GRACE?
>> RETURN TO A TIME WHEN LOVE

571
00:18:40,987 --> 00:18:41,919
GRACE?
>> RETURN TO A TIME WHEN LOVE
CONQUERED ALL.

572
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:47,959
>> RETURN TO A TIME WHEN LOVE
CONQUERED ALL.
>> I AM TIRED OF PRETENDING.

573
00:18:47,961 --> 00:18:48,993
CONQUERED ALL.
>> I AM TIRED OF PRETENDING.
AND I CANNOT CONTINUE ACTING AS

574
00:18:48,995 --> 00:18:53,931
>> I AM TIRED OF PRETENDING.
AND I CANNOT CONTINUE ACTING AS
IF...  AS IF I DO NOT LOVE YOU.

575
00:18:53,933 --> 00:18:57,001
AND I CANNOT CONTINUE ACTING AS
IF...  AS IF I DO NOT LOVE YOU.
>> HOT DAMN!

576
00:18:57,003 --> 00:18:59,070
IF...  AS IF I DO NOT LOVE YOU.
>> HOT DAMN!
LOOKS LIKE TONIGHT'S MENU IS

577
00:18:59,072 --> 00:18:59,971
>> HOT DAMN!
LOOKS LIKE TONIGHT'S MENU IS
PORKING WITH A SIDE OF

578
00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:00,972
LOOKS LIKE TONIGHT'S MENU IS
PORKING WITH A SIDE OF
SIDE-BOOB!

579
00:19:00,974 --> 00:19:05,643
PORKING WITH A SIDE OF
SIDE-BOOB!
>> A TIME OF DESIRE.

580
00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:06,177
SIDE-BOOB!
>> A TIME OF DESIRE.
>> I HEREBY KNIGHT ME "SIR

581
00:19:06,179 --> 00:19:09,013
>> A TIME OF DESIRE.
>> I HEREBY KNIGHT ME "SIR
BOINKS-A-LOT."

582
00:19:09,015 --> 00:19:11,916
>> I HEREBY KNIGHT ME "SIR
BOINKS-A-LOT."
NOW ARISE.

583
00:19:11,918 --> 00:19:13,351
BOINKS-A-LOT."
NOW ARISE.
>> A TIME OF THE HEART.

584
00:19:13,353 --> 00:19:16,988
NOW ARISE.
>> A TIME OF THE HEART.
>> I LOVE ALL OF YOU, EVERY

585
00:19:16,990 --> 00:19:20,992
>> A TIME OF THE HEART.
>> I LOVE ALL OF YOU, EVERY
SCAR, EVERY FLAW, EVERY

586
00:19:20,994 --> 00:19:21,692
>> I LOVE ALL OF YOU, EVERY
SCAR, EVERY FLAW, EVERY
IMPERFECTION.

587
00:19:21,694 --> 00:19:23,995
SCAR, EVERY FLAW, EVERY
IMPERFECTION.
>> YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT THE RASH

588
00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:27,398
IMPERFECTION.
>> YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT THE RASH
ON MY BALLS, RIGHT?

589
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:28,032
>> YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT THE RASH
ON MY BALLS, RIGHT?
THE APOTHECARY SAYS JUST SLATHER

590
00:19:28,034 --> 00:19:29,300
ON MY BALLS, RIGHT?
THE APOTHECARY SAYS JUST SLATHER
ON THIS UNGUENT!

591
00:19:29,302 --> 00:19:33,004
THE APOTHECARY SAYS JUST SLATHER
ON THIS UNGUENT!
A HAND, M'LADY?

592
00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:35,806
ON THIS UNGUENT!
A HAND, M'LADY?
DOWN IN SOUTH SUSSEX?

593
00:19:35,808 --> 00:19:41,012
A HAND, M'LADY?
DOWN IN SOUTH SUSSEX?
>> A TIME OF... THIS.

594
00:19:41,014 --> 00:19:44,615
DOWN IN SOUTH SUSSEX?
>> A TIME OF... THIS.
>> THERE ARE OTHER THINGS,

595
00:19:44,617 --> 00:19:45,249
>> A TIME OF... THIS.
>> THERE ARE OTHER THINGS,
PHYSICAL, OR PERHAPS INTANGIBLE,

596
00:19:45,251 --> 00:19:47,952
>> THERE ARE OTHER THINGS,
PHYSICAL, OR PERHAPS INTANGIBLE,
THAT BRING A COUPLE TOGETHER.

597
00:19:47,954 --> 00:19:52,089
PHYSICAL, OR PERHAPS INTANGIBLE,
THAT BRING A COUPLE TOGETHER.
>> TIME TO DROP PANTALOONS AND

598
00:19:52,091 --> 00:19:52,990
THAT BRING A COUPLE TOGETHER.
>> TIME TO DROP PANTALOONS AND
SHOW THE WORLD MY JUICY BUNS.

599
00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:53,991
>> TIME TO DROP PANTALOONS AND
SHOW THE WORLD MY JUICY BUNS.
YOU LIKE?

600
00:19:53,993 --> 00:19:56,994
SHOW THE WORLD MY JUICY BUNS.
YOU LIKE?
IT'S NOT EVEN BEEN BLURRED.

601
00:19:56,996 --> 00:19:59,997
YOU LIKE?
IT'S NOT EVEN BEEN BLURRED.
AT MY AGE, MY ASS JUST LOOKS

602
00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:04,869
IT'S NOT EVEN BEEN BLURRED.
AT MY AGE, MY ASS JUST LOOKS
LIKE THAT.

603
00:20:04,871 --> 00:20:05,503
AT MY AGE, MY ASS JUST LOOKS
LIKE THAT.
>> NEXT SEASON, GIRD YOUR LOINS.

604
00:20:05,505 --> 00:20:09,006
LIKE THAT.
>> NEXT SEASON, GIRD YOUR LOINS.
>> IT'S JOLLY OLD ENGLAND, AND

605
00:20:09,008 --> 00:20:10,575
>> NEXT SEASON, GIRD YOUR LOINS.
>> IT'S JOLLY OLD ENGLAND, AND
I'VE GOT A SPOTTED DICK!

606
00:20:10,577 --> 00:20:11,976
>> IT'S JOLLY OLD ENGLAND, AND
I'VE GOT A SPOTTED DICK!
>> STEPHEN: THANK YOU, GILBERT

607
00:20:11,978 --> 00:20:14,745
I'VE GOT A SPOTTED DICK!
>> STEPHEN: THANK YOU, GILBERT
GOTTFRIED!

608
00:20:14,747 --> 00:20:15,279
>> STEPHEN: THANK YOU, GILBERT
GOTTFRIED!
AND THANK YOU, PEABODY

609
00:20:15,281 --> 00:20:16,781
GOTTFRIED!
AND THANK YOU, PEABODY
COMMITTEE, FOR HONORING WORK

610
00:20:16,783 --> 00:20:17,048
AND THANK YOU, PEABODY
COMMITTEE, FOR HONORING WORK
LIKE THAT.

611
00:20:17,050 --> 00:20:17,682
COMMITTEE, FOR HONORING WORK
LIKE THAT.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH ANDREW

612
00:20:17,684 --> 00:20:20,985
LIKE THAT.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH ANDREW
GARFIELD.

613
00:20:20,987 --> 00:20:22,620
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH ANDREW
GARFIELD.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

614
00:20:22,622 --> 00:20:23,921
GARFIELD.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪

615
00:20:33,765 --> 00:20:42,473
♪♪
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW"!

616
00:20:42,475 --> 00:20:46,143
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW"!
RIGHT HERE ON THE CBS TELEVISION

617
00:20:46,145 --> 00:20:48,246
WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW"!
RIGHT HERE ON THE CBS TELEVISION
NETWORK.

618
00:20:48,248 --> 00:20:48,746
RIGHT HERE ON THE CBS TELEVISION
NETWORK.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

619
00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:50,548
NETWORK.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --

620
00:20:50,550 --> 00:20:50,815
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --
CHECKMATE.

621
00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:53,651
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN --
CHECKMATE.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST

622
00:20:53,653 --> 00:20:55,553
CHECKMATE.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST
GUEST TONIGHT IS A TONY

623
00:20:55,555 --> 00:20:56,120
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST
GUEST TONIGHT IS A TONY
AWARD WINNING ACTOR YOU KNOW

624
00:20:56,122 --> 00:20:56,754
GUEST TONIGHT IS A TONY
AWARD WINNING ACTOR YOU KNOW
FROM "THE SOCIAL NETWORK," "THE

625
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:57,255
AWARD WINNING ACTOR YOU KNOW
FROM "THE SOCIAL NETWORK," "THE
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN," AND

626
00:20:57,257 --> 00:21:00,057
FROM "THE SOCIAL NETWORK," "THE
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN," AND
"HACKSAW RIDGE."

627
00:21:00,059 --> 00:21:01,392
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN," AND
"HACKSAW RIDGE."
THIS FALL HE STARS IN TWO

628
00:21:01,394 --> 00:21:01,993
"HACKSAW RIDGE."
THIS FALL HE STARS IN TWO
NEW FILMS: "THE EYES OF TAMMY

629
00:21:01,995 --> 00:21:04,695
THIS FALL HE STARS IN TWO
NEW FILMS: "THE EYES OF TAMMY
FAYE" AND "TICK TICK BOOM!"

630
00:21:04,697 --> 00:21:05,663
NEW FILMS: "THE EYES OF TAMMY
FAYE" AND "TICK TICK BOOM!"
PLEASE WELCOME TO "THE LATE

631
00:21:05,665 --> 00:21:08,733
FAYE" AND "TICK TICK BOOM!"
PLEASE WELCOME TO "THE LATE
SHOW," ANDREW GARFIELD!

632
00:21:08,735 --> 00:21:10,301
PLEASE WELCOME TO "THE LATE
SHOW," ANDREW GARFIELD!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

633
00:21:10,303 --> 00:21:26,684
SHOW," ANDREW GARFIELD!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪

634
00:21:32,391 --> 00:21:32,790
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

635
00:21:33,759 --> 00:21:36,894
>> Stephen: NICE TO SEE YOU
AGAIN.
>> CRAZY.

636
00:21:36,896 --> 00:21:40,765
AGAIN.
>> CRAZY.
SO NICE TO SEE YOU, JON.

637
00:21:40,767 --> 00:21:41,365
>> CRAZY.
SO NICE TO SEE YOU, JON.
CONGRATULATIONS.

638
00:21:41,367 --> 00:21:43,968
SO NICE TO SEE YOU, JON.
CONGRATULATIONS.
I'M JUST SO, LIKE, MY ART SOUL

639
00:21:43,970 --> 00:21:44,235
CONGRATULATIONS.
I'M JUST SO, LIKE, MY ART SOUL
BROTHER.

640
00:21:44,237 --> 00:21:45,870
I'M JUST SO, LIKE, MY ART SOUL
BROTHER.
I'M JUST, LIKE, THANK YOU FOR

641
00:21:45,872 --> 00:21:48,205
BROTHER.
I'M JUST, LIKE, THANK YOU FOR
EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE THIS

642
00:21:48,207 --> 00:21:49,173
I'M JUST, LIKE, THANK YOU FOR
EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE THIS
YEAR.

643
00:21:49,175 --> 00:21:52,443
EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE THIS
YEAR.
HELLO!

644
00:21:52,445 --> 00:21:52,943
YEAR.
HELLO!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

645
00:21:52,945 --> 00:21:53,811
HELLO!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND A PEABODY!

646
00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:55,479
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND A PEABODY!
>> Stephen: AND A PEABODY.

647
00:21:55,481 --> 00:21:58,249
AND A PEABODY!
>> Stephen: AND A PEABODY.
NINE YEARS AGO, YOU MADE YOUR

648
00:21:58,251 --> 00:22:01,652
>> Stephen: AND A PEABODY.
NINE YEARS AGO, YOU MADE YOUR
BROADWAY DEBUT IN "DEATH OF A

649
00:22:01,654 --> 00:22:02,620
NINE YEARS AGO, YOU MADE YOUR
BROADWAY DEBUT IN "DEATH OF A
SALESMAN."

650
00:22:02,622 --> 00:22:02,853
BROADWAY DEBUT IN "DEATH OF A
SALESMAN."
>> YES.

651
00:22:02,855 --> 00:22:04,221
SALESMAN."
>> YES.
>> Stephen: WITH THE GREAT

652
00:22:04,223 --> 00:22:06,824
>> YES.
>> Stephen: WITH THE GREAT
MIKE NICHOLS RIGHT HERE.

653
00:22:06,826 --> 00:22:08,726
>> Stephen: WITH THE GREAT
MIKE NICHOLS RIGHT HERE.
THERE YOU ARE.

654
00:22:08,728 --> 00:22:09,260
MIKE NICHOLS RIGHT HERE.
THERE YOU ARE.
( APPLAUSE )

655
00:22:09,262 --> 00:22:11,329
THERE YOU ARE.
( APPLAUSE )
I'M ONLY A LITTLE JEALOUS TO

656
00:22:11,331 --> 00:22:14,265
( APPLAUSE )
I'M ONLY A LITTLE JEALOUS TO
SPEND A LITTLE TIME WITH THE

657
00:22:14,267 --> 00:22:14,732
I'M ONLY A LITTLE JEALOUS TO
SPEND A LITTLE TIME WITH THE
MAN.

658
00:22:14,734 --> 00:22:16,967
SPEND A LITTLE TIME WITH THE
MAN.
HE ONCE SAID YOU HAD ENORMOUS

659
00:22:16,969 --> 00:22:18,302
MAN.
HE ONCE SAID YOU HAD ENORMOUS
EMOTIONAL EQUIPMENT.

660
00:22:18,304 --> 00:22:19,003
HE ONCE SAID YOU HAD ENORMOUS
EMOTIONAL EQUIPMENT.
( LAUGHTER )

661
00:22:19,005 --> 00:22:23,007
EMOTIONAL EQUIPMENT.
( LAUGHTER )
I'M ASSUMING THAT'S NOT A

662
00:22:23,009 --> 00:22:23,541
( LAUGHTER )
I'M ASSUMING THAT'S NOT A
EUPHEMISM.

663
00:22:23,543 --> 00:22:26,110
I'M ASSUMING THAT'S NOT A
EUPHEMISM.
>> IS THAT LIKE AN

664
00:22:26,112 --> 00:22:26,510
EUPHEMISM.
>> IS THAT LIKE AN
OVERCOMPENSATION?

665
00:22:26,512 --> 00:22:27,044
>> IS THAT LIKE AN
OVERCOMPENSATION?
>> Stephen: HOW WOULD YOU

666
00:22:27,046 --> 00:22:28,279
OVERCOMPENSATION?
>> Stephen: HOW WOULD YOU
DESCRIBE HIM?

667
00:22:28,281 --> 00:22:29,680
>> Stephen: HOW WOULD YOU
DESCRIBE HIM?
BECAUSE, AGAIN --

668
00:22:29,682 --> 00:22:30,981
DESCRIBE HIM?
BECAUSE, AGAIN --
>> ENORMOUS EQUIPMENT,

669
00:22:30,983 --> 00:22:31,248
BECAUSE, AGAIN --
>> ENORMOUS EQUIPMENT,
GENERALLY.

670
00:22:31,250 --> 00:22:32,316
>> ENORMOUS EQUIPMENT,
GENERALLY.
>> Stephen: I WOULD HAVE LOVED

671
00:22:32,318 --> 00:22:33,818
GENERALLY.
>> Stephen: I WOULD HAVE LOVED
TO HAVE KNOWN OR WORKED WITH

672
00:22:33,820 --> 00:22:34,352
>> Stephen: I WOULD HAVE LOVED
TO HAVE KNOWN OR WORKED WITH
HIM.

673
00:22:34,354 --> 00:22:36,220
TO HAVE KNOWN OR WORKED WITH
HIM.
HE'S CERTAINLY A HERO.

674
00:22:36,222 --> 00:22:37,688
HIM.
HE'S CERTAINLY A HERO.
>> YEAH, AND A HERO TO ME.

675
00:22:37,690 --> 00:22:40,591
HE'S CERTAINLY A HERO.
>> YEAH, AND A HERO TO ME.
ALWAYS WAS A HERO TO ME

676
00:22:40,593 --> 00:22:40,925
>> YEAH, AND A HERO TO ME.
ALWAYS WAS A HERO TO ME
ARTISTICALLY.

677
00:22:40,927 --> 00:22:42,059
ALWAYS WAS A HERO TO ME
ARTISTICALLY.
THERE'S A STORY THAT COMES TO

678
00:22:42,061 --> 00:22:45,496
ARTISTICALLY.
THERE'S A STORY THAT COMES TO
MIND THAT IS VERY INDICATIVE OF

679
00:22:45,498 --> 00:22:45,763
THERE'S A STORY THAT COMES TO
MIND THAT IS VERY INDICATIVE OF
THIS.

680
00:22:45,765 --> 00:22:48,566
MIND THAT IS VERY INDICATIVE OF
THIS.
ON BROADWAY, USUALLY LUMINAIRES

681
00:22:48,568 --> 00:22:49,800
THIS.
ON BROADWAY, USUALLY LUMINAIRES
OF THEATER WILL GO BACK AND

682
00:22:49,802 --> 00:22:51,936
ON BROADWAY, USUALLY LUMINAIRES
OF THEATER WILL GO BACK AND
THANK THE CAST AND SAY HELLO TO

683
00:22:51,938 --> 00:22:54,772
OF THEATER WILL GO BACK AND
THANK THE CAST AND SAY HELLO TO
THE CAST AT THE STAGE DOOR EVERY

684
00:22:54,774 --> 00:22:55,139
THANK THE CAST AND SAY HELLO TO
THE CAST AT THE STAGE DOOR EVERY
PERFORMANCE.

685
00:22:55,141 --> 00:22:56,273
THE CAST AT THE STAGE DOOR EVERY
PERFORMANCE.
MIKE NEVER MISSED THIS.

686
00:22:56,275 --> 00:22:58,476
PERFORMANCE.
MIKE NEVER MISSED THIS.
EVEN IF HE DIDN'T LIKE THE SHOW,

687
00:22:58,478 --> 00:23:00,211
MIKE NEVER MISSED THIS.
EVEN IF HE DIDN'T LIKE THE SHOW,
HE WOULD GO BACK AND SAY, YOU

688
00:23:00,213 --> 00:23:01,078
EVEN IF HE DIDN'T LIKE THE SHOW,
HE WOULD GO BACK AND SAY, YOU
DID IT!

689
00:23:01,080 --> 00:23:02,313
HE WOULD GO BACK AND SAY, YOU
DID IT!
I LIKED YOUR HAT!

690
00:23:02,315 --> 00:23:03,948
DID IT!
I LIKED YOUR HAT!
THEN HE WOULD LEAVE.

691
00:23:03,950 --> 00:23:05,383
I LIKED YOUR HAT!
THEN HE WOULD LEAVE.
BUT HE WOULD BE SO, SO GENEROUS.

692
00:23:05,385 --> 00:23:06,984
THEN HE WOULD LEAVE.
BUT HE WOULD BE SO, SO GENEROUS.
EVEN IN THOSE CIRCUMSTANCES.

693
00:23:06,986 --> 00:23:09,687
BUT HE WOULD BE SO, SO GENEROUS.
EVEN IN THOSE CIRCUMSTANCES.
BUT THERE'S THIS ONE STORY I

694
00:23:09,689 --> 00:23:13,057
EVEN IN THOSE CIRCUMSTANCES.
BUT THERE'S THIS ONE STORY I
HEARD ABOUT HIM THAT SUMS IT UP

695
00:23:13,059 --> 00:23:13,591
BUT THERE'S THIS ONE STORY I
HEARD ABOUT HIM THAT SUMS IT UP
SO BEAUTIFULLY.

696
00:23:13,593 --> 00:23:15,526
HEARD ABOUT HIM THAT SUMS IT UP
SO BEAUTIFULLY.
HE CAME BACK AFTER THE SHOW,

697
00:23:15,528 --> 00:23:17,395
SO BEAUTIFULLY.
HE CAME BACK AFTER THE SHOW,
THANKS EVERY CAST MEMBER, SHOOK

698
00:23:17,397 --> 00:23:18,863
HE CAME BACK AFTER THE SHOW,
THANKS EVERY CAST MEMBER, SHOOK
HANDS, GAVE THEM KISSES AND

699
00:23:18,865 --> 00:23:19,063
THANKS EVERY CAST MEMBER, SHOOK
HANDS, GAVE THEM KISSES AND
LEFT.

700
00:23:19,065 --> 00:23:20,631
HANDS, GAVE THEM KISSES AND
LEFT.
AND ONE YOUNG LADY IN THE

701
00:23:20,633 --> 00:23:22,133
LEFT.
AND ONE YOUNG LADY IN THE
COMPANY WAS OBSESSED WITH MIKE

702
00:23:22,135 --> 00:23:24,101
AND ONE YOUNG LADY IN THE
COMPANY WAS OBSESSED WITH MIKE
AND HEARD THAT HE WAS IN, WAS UP

703
00:23:24,103 --> 00:23:27,138
COMPANY WAS OBSESSED WITH MIKE
AND HEARD THAT HE WAS IN, WAS UP
IN HER DRESSING ROOM, JUST SPENT

704
00:23:27,140 --> 00:23:29,640
AND HEARD THAT HE WAS IN, WAS UP
IN HER DRESSING ROOM, JUST SPENT
A LITTLE BIT TOO LONG TO MEET

705
00:23:29,642 --> 00:23:31,609
IN HER DRESSING ROOM, JUST SPENT
A LITTLE BIT TOO LONG TO MEET
MIKE NICHOLS, SHE COMES DOWN THE

706
00:23:31,611 --> 00:23:34,245
A LITTLE BIT TOO LONG TO MEET
MIKE NICHOLS, SHE COMES DOWN THE
STAGE DOOR AND THE COMPANY

707
00:23:34,247 --> 00:23:37,782
MIKE NICHOLS, SHE COMES DOWN THE
STAGE DOOR AND THE COMPANY
MEMBERS SAID YOU LITERALLY -- HE

708
00:23:37,784 --> 00:23:39,116
STAGE DOOR AND THE COMPANY
MEMBERS SAID YOU LITERALLY -- HE
LITERALLY LEFT FIVE MINUTES AGO,

709
00:23:39,118 --> 00:23:41,118
MEMBERS SAID YOU LITERALLY -- HE
LITERALLY LEFT FIVE MINUTES AGO,
YOU JUST MISSED HIM.

710
00:23:41,120 --> 00:23:42,486
LITERALLY LEFT FIVE MINUTES AGO,
YOU JUST MISSED HIM.
SHE'S DESPONDENT.

711
00:23:42,488 --> 00:23:44,054
YOU JUST MISSED HIM.
SHE'S DESPONDENT.
SHE GOES BACK UP, THE STAGE DOOR

712
00:23:44,056 --> 00:23:45,990
SHE'S DESPONDENT.
SHE GOES BACK UP, THE STAGE DOOR
OPENS BEHIND HER, SHE TURNS

713
00:23:45,992 --> 00:23:48,192
SHE GOES BACK UP, THE STAGE DOOR
OPENS BEHIND HER, SHE TURNS
AROUND, MIKE STICKS HIS HEAD IN,

714
00:23:48,194 --> 00:23:50,694
OPENS BEHIND HER, SHE TURNS
AROUND, MIKE STICKS HIS HEAD IN,
LOOKS AROUND, CATCHES HER AND

715
00:23:50,696 --> 00:23:52,563
AROUND, MIKE STICKS HIS HEAD IN,
LOOKS AROUND, CATCHES HER AND
SAYS, YOU!

716
00:23:52,565 --> 00:23:55,833
LOOKS AROUND, CATCHES HER AND
SAYS, YOU!
YOU'RE AUDREY HEPBURN!

717
00:23:55,835 --> 00:23:56,634
SAYS, YOU!
YOU'RE AUDREY HEPBURN!
AND THEN LEAVES.

718
00:23:56,636 --> 00:23:57,301
YOU'RE AUDREY HEPBURN!
AND THEN LEAVES.
>> Stephen: WOW.

719
00:23:57,303 --> 00:24:00,137
AND THEN LEAVES.
>> Stephen: WOW.
THAT'S LOVELY.

720
00:24:00,139 --> 00:24:00,438
>> Stephen: WOW.
THAT'S LOVELY.
( APPLAUSE )

721
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:02,706
THAT'S LOVELY.
( APPLAUSE )
I GOT TO MEET HIM ONCE AT THE

722
00:24:02,708 --> 00:24:03,874
( APPLAUSE )
I GOT TO MEET HIM ONCE AT THE
KENNEDY CENTER BECAUSE I WAS

723
00:24:03,876 --> 00:24:05,643
I GOT TO MEET HIM ONCE AT THE
KENNEDY CENTER BECAUSE I WAS
HOSTING AND HE WAS THERE, AND I

724
00:24:05,645 --> 00:24:08,712
KENNEDY CENTER BECAUSE I WAS
HOSTING AND HE WAS THERE, AND I
WENT OVER TO SAY HELLO TO MERYL

725
00:24:08,714 --> 00:24:10,981
HOSTING AND HE WAS THERE, AND I
WENT OVER TO SAY HELLO TO MERYL
STREEP, AND MERYL STREEP --

726
00:24:10,983 --> 00:24:11,549
WENT OVER TO SAY HELLO TO MERYL
STREEP, AND MERYL STREEP --
YEAH, THUD.

727
00:24:11,551 --> 00:24:13,884
STREEP, AND MERYL STREEP --
YEAH, THUD.
BECAUSE I INTERVIEWED HER AND

728
00:24:13,886 --> 00:24:15,252
YEAH, THUD.
BECAUSE I INTERVIEWED HER AND
SHE'S, LIKE, OH, MIKE WANTS TO

729
00:24:15,254 --> 00:24:17,188
BECAUSE I INTERVIEWED HER AND
SHE'S, LIKE, OH, MIKE WANTS TO
MEET YOU.

730
00:24:17,190 --> 00:24:19,890
SHE'S, LIKE, OH, MIKE WANTS TO
MEET YOU.
AND I SAID, OKAY.

731
00:24:19,892 --> 00:24:21,459
MEET YOU.
AND I SAID, OKAY.
MIKE'S RIGHT THERE, I GO OVER TO

732
00:24:21,461 --> 00:24:22,660
AND I SAID, OKAY.
MIKE'S RIGHT THERE, I GO OVER TO
SAY HELLO TO HIM AND I DON'T

733
00:24:22,662 --> 00:24:24,929
MIKE'S RIGHT THERE, I GO OVER TO
SAY HELLO TO HIM AND I DON'T
KNOW WHAT HE SAID TO ME BECAUSE

734
00:24:24,931 --> 00:24:26,730
SAY HELLO TO HIM AND I DON'T
KNOW WHAT HE SAID TO ME BECAUSE
THE ENTIRE TIME HE WAS TALKING

735
00:24:26,732 --> 00:24:29,333
KNOW WHAT HE SAID TO ME BECAUSE
THE ENTIRE TIME HE WAS TALKING
TO ME I WAS SAYING, IT'S MIKE

736
00:24:29,335 --> 00:24:32,703
THE ENTIRE TIME HE WAS TALKING
TO ME I WAS SAYING, IT'S MIKE
NICHOLS, IT'S MIKE NICHOLS, IT'S

737
00:24:32,705 --> 00:24:33,637
TO ME I WAS SAYING, IT'S MIKE
NICHOLS, IT'S MIKE NICHOLS, IT'S
MIKE NICHOLS.

738
00:24:33,639 --> 00:24:35,940
NICHOLS, IT'S MIKE NICHOLS, IT'S
MIKE NICHOLS.
>> HE PROBABLY JUST SAID, YOU'RE

739
00:24:35,942 --> 00:24:38,442
MIKE NICHOLS.
>> HE PROBABLY JUST SAID, YOU'RE
AUDREY HEPBURN!

740
00:24:38,444 --> 00:24:39,176
>> HE PROBABLY JUST SAID, YOU'RE
AUDREY HEPBURN!
>> Stephen: YEAH.

741
00:24:39,178 --> 00:24:40,911
AUDREY HEPBURN!
>> Stephen: YEAH.
AFTER I FIRST MET HIM, IT

742
00:24:40,913 --> 00:24:45,649
>> Stephen: YEAH.
AFTER I FIRST MET HIM, IT
TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO SETTLE

743
00:24:45,651 --> 00:24:45,850
AFTER I FIRST MET HIM, IT
TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO SETTLE
IN.

744
00:24:45,852 --> 00:24:48,052
TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO SETTLE
IN.
WHEN WE WERE DOING "DEATH OF A

745
00:24:48,054 --> 00:24:49,820
IN.
WHEN WE WERE DOING "DEATH OF A
SALESMAN," FOR US DOING ANY ART,

746
00:24:49,822 --> 00:24:52,556
WHEN WE WERE DOING "DEATH OF A
SALESMAN," FOR US DOING ANY ART,
THERE'S NEVER ANY SATISFACTION

747
00:24:52,558 --> 00:24:54,558
SALESMAN," FOR US DOING ANY ART,
THERE'S NEVER ANY SATISFACTION
WHATSOEVER, WE'RE ALWAYS JUST

748
00:24:54,560 --> 00:24:55,593
THERE'S NEVER ANY SATISFACTION
WHATSOEVER, WE'RE ALWAYS JUST
SEARCHING AND YEARNING AND

749
00:24:55,595 --> 00:24:57,461
WHATSOEVER, WE'RE ALWAYS JUST
SEARCHING AND YEARNING AND
NEUROTIC AND TRYING TO GET IT

750
00:24:57,463 --> 00:24:57,795
SEARCHING AND YEARNING AND
NEUROTIC AND TRYING TO GET IT
RIGHT.

751
00:24:57,797 --> 00:24:59,396
NEUROTIC AND TRYING TO GET IT
RIGHT.
I REMEMBER I WAS FETCHING ABOUT

752
00:24:59,398 --> 00:25:00,564
RIGHT.
I REMEMBER I WAS FETCHING ABOUT
SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE

753
00:25:00,566 --> 00:25:00,898
I REMEMBER I WAS FETCHING ABOUT
SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
RUN.

754
00:25:00,900 --> 00:25:03,234
SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
RUN.
WE HAD ALREADY WON A BUNCH OF

755
00:25:03,236 --> 00:25:06,437
RUN.
WE HAD ALREADY WON A BUNCH OF
TONYS AND I'M, LIKE, NO, MIKE,

756
00:25:06,439 --> 00:25:08,172
WE HAD ALREADY WON A BUNCH OF
TONYS AND I'M, LIKE, NO, MIKE,
YANLTD GET THIS MOMENT RIGHT.

757
00:25:08,174 --> 00:25:12,810
TONYS AND I'M, LIKE, NO, MIKE,
YANLTD GET THIS MOMENT RIGHT.
HE'S LIKE, DEAR BOY, I'M NOT

758
00:25:12,812 --> 00:25:13,544
YANLTD GET THIS MOMENT RIGHT.
HE'S LIKE, DEAR BOY, I'M NOT
WORRIED ABOUT YOU.

759
00:25:13,546 --> 00:25:16,413
HE'S LIKE, DEAR BOY, I'M NOT
WORRIED ABOUT YOU.
YOU'RE JUST LIKE ME, YOU DON'T

760
00:25:16,415 --> 00:25:18,449
WORRIED ABOUT YOU.
YOU'RE JUST LIKE ME, YOU DON'T
THINK HIGHLY OF YOURSELF AT ALL.

761
00:25:18,451 --> 00:25:20,217
YOU'RE JUST LIKE ME, YOU DON'T
THINK HIGHLY OF YOURSELF AT ALL.
IT WAS THE BEAUTIFUL BLESSING TO

762
00:25:20,219 --> 00:25:23,821
THINK HIGHLY OF YOURSELF AT ALL.
IT WAS THE BEAUTIFUL BLESSING TO
HAVE THE WOMB, THE CHOSEN DIVINE

763
00:25:23,823 --> 00:25:24,889
IT WAS THE BEAUTIFUL BLESSING TO
HAVE THE WOMB, THE CHOSEN DIVINE
DISSATISFACTION THAT WE ARE KIND

764
00:25:24,891 --> 00:25:29,693
HAVE THE WOMB, THE CHOSEN DIVINE
DISSATISFACTION THAT WE ARE KIND
OF WEDDED TO UNTIL WE DRIVE AS

765
00:25:29,695 --> 00:25:32,530
DISSATISFACTION THAT WE ARE KIND
OF WEDDED TO UNTIL WE DRIVE AS
ARTISTS WHO ARE STRIVING TOWARD

766
00:25:32,532 --> 00:25:34,598
OF WEDDED TO UNTIL WE DRIVE AS
ARTISTS WHO ARE STRIVING TOWARD
PERFECTION, A SPIRITUAL HEIGHT

767
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:36,133
ARTISTS WHO ARE STRIVING TOWARD
PERFECTION, A SPIRITUAL HEIGHT
WE'LL NEVER GET TO, AND HE MADE

768
00:25:36,135 --> 00:25:37,568
PERFECTION, A SPIRITUAL HEIGHT
WE'LL NEVER GET TO, AND HE MADE
THAT A BEAUTIFUL THING, SO I

769
00:25:37,570 --> 00:25:39,904
WE'LL NEVER GET TO, AND HE MADE
THAT A BEAUTIFUL THING, SO I
HOLE IT CLOSE TO ME, WHENEVER I

770
00:25:39,906 --> 00:25:43,607
THAT A BEAUTIFUL THING, SO I
HOLE IT CLOSE TO ME, WHENEVER I
GO ON STAGE, WHENEVER I GO ON

771
00:25:43,609 --> 00:25:44,675
HOLE IT CLOSE TO ME, WHENEVER I
GO ON STAGE, WHENEVER I GO ON
FILM STAGE.

772
00:25:44,677 --> 00:25:46,710
GO ON STAGE, WHENEVER I GO ON
FILM STAGE.
HE'S WITH ME AS AN ANCESTOR NOW.

773
00:25:46,712 --> 00:25:48,312
FILM STAGE.
HE'S WITH ME AS AN ANCESTOR NOW.
EVEN NOW -- I DON'T WANT TO CRY.

774
00:25:48,314 --> 00:25:49,713
HE'S WITH ME AS AN ANCESTOR NOW.
EVEN NOW -- I DON'T WANT TO CRY.
BUT, YEAH, HE'S HERE.

775
00:25:49,715 --> 00:25:50,581
EVEN NOW -- I DON'T WANT TO CRY.
BUT, YEAH, HE'S HERE.
HE'S REMARKABLE.

776
00:25:50,583 --> 00:25:50,848
BUT, YEAH, HE'S HERE.
HE'S REMARKABLE.
HE'S HERE.

777
00:25:50,850 --> 00:25:53,651
HE'S REMARKABLE.
HE'S HERE.
>> Stephen: DO YOU HAVE ANY

778
00:25:53,653 --> 00:25:55,219
HE'S HERE.
>> Stephen: DO YOU HAVE ANY
OTHER -- DO YOU HAVE ANY

779
00:25:55,221 --> 00:25:56,353
>> Stephen: DO YOU HAVE ANY
OTHER -- DO YOU HAVE ANY
TRADITIONS YOU DO BEFORE YOU GO

780
00:25:56,355 --> 00:25:56,720
OTHER -- DO YOU HAVE ANY
TRADITIONS YOU DO BEFORE YOU GO
ON STAGE?

781
00:25:56,722 --> 00:25:59,156
TRADITIONS YOU DO BEFORE YOU GO
ON STAGE?
>> I DO A LOT OF DIFFERENT

782
00:25:59,158 --> 00:26:01,025
ON STAGE?
>> I DO A LOT OF DIFFERENT
THINGS.

783
00:26:01,027 --> 00:26:01,659
>> I DO A LOT OF DIFFERENT
THINGS.
DEPENDS ON THE SHOW.

784
00:26:01,661 --> 00:26:03,327
THINGS.
DEPENDS ON THE SHOW.
STRANGERS IN AMERICA, BECAUSE

785
00:26:03,329 --> 00:26:04,995
DEPENDS ON THE SHOW.
STRANGERS IN AMERICA, BECAUSE
IT'S AN EIGHT HOUR SHOW BECAUSE

786
00:26:04,997 --> 00:26:08,032
STRANGERS IN AMERICA, BECAUSE
IT'S AN EIGHT HOUR SHOW BECAUSE
I STRUGGLE WITH THE NEVER

787
00:26:08,034 --> 00:26:09,466
IT'S AN EIGHT HOUR SHOW BECAUSE
I STRUGGLE WITH THE NEVER
ENOUGHNESS AND IT WILL NEVER BE

788
00:26:09,468 --> 00:26:12,736
I STRUGGLE WITH THE NEVER
ENOUGHNESS AND IT WILL NEVER BE
JUST RIGHT, THERE'S AN OLD

789
00:26:12,738 --> 00:26:14,405
ENOUGHNESS AND IT WILL NEVER BE
JUST RIGHT, THERE'S AN OLD
TRADITION THAT YOU SPIT ON THE

790
00:26:14,407 --> 00:26:14,605
JUST RIGHT, THERE'S AN OLD
TRADITION THAT YOU SPIT ON THE
STAGE.

791
00:26:14,607 --> 00:26:15,005
TRADITION THAT YOU SPIT ON THE
STAGE.
>> Stephen: WHY?

792
00:26:15,007 --> 00:26:16,273
STAGE.
>> Stephen: WHY?
BECAUSE YOU'VE GOT A COLD.

793
00:26:16,275 --> 00:26:17,875
>> Stephen: WHY?
BECAUSE YOU'VE GOT A COLD.
NO, IT'S BASICALLY SAYING I'M

794
00:26:17,877 --> 00:26:20,277
BECAUSE YOU'VE GOT A COLD.
NO, IT'S BASICALLY SAYING I'M
GOING TO GIVE YOU ALL OF ME.

795
00:26:20,279 --> 00:26:22,179
NO, IT'S BASICALLY SAYING I'M
GOING TO GIVE YOU ALL OF ME.
I'M GOING TO LEAVE ALL OF MYSELF

796
00:26:22,181 --> 00:26:23,747
GOING TO GIVE YOU ALL OF ME.
I'M GOING TO LEAVE ALL OF MYSELF
HERE, EVEN THE LESS PRETTY

797
00:26:23,749 --> 00:26:25,649
I'M GOING TO LEAVE ALL OF MYSELF
HERE, EVEN THE LESS PRETTY
PARTS, THE LESS ATTRACTIVE

798
00:26:25,651 --> 00:26:27,685
HERE, EVEN THE LESS PRETTY
PARTS, THE LESS ATTRACTIVE
PARTS, THE BILE, THE STUFF FROM

799
00:26:27,687 --> 00:26:29,153
PARTS, THE LESS ATTRACTIVE
PARTS, THE BILE, THE STUFF FROM
THE GUTS.

800
00:26:29,155 --> 00:26:30,988
PARTS, THE BILE, THE STUFF FROM
THE GUTS.
I'M BRINGING, LIKE, GOD IS

801
00:26:30,990 --> 00:26:32,690
THE GUTS.
I'M BRINGING, LIKE, GOD IS
PERFECT, WHATEVER GOD MEANS TO

802
00:26:32,692 --> 00:26:35,593
I'M BRINGING, LIKE, GOD IS
PERFECT, WHATEVER GOD MEANS TO
ANYBODY IN THIS ROOM, ONE'S

803
00:26:35,595 --> 00:26:37,194
PERFECT, WHATEVER GOD MEANS TO
ANYBODY IN THIS ROOM, ONE'S
HIGHER POWER IS PERFECT BUT

804
00:26:37,196 --> 00:26:38,495
ANYBODY IN THIS ROOM, ONE'S
HIGHER POWER IS PERFECT BUT
WE'RE NOT MEANT TO BE.

805
00:26:38,497 --> 00:26:40,564
HIGHER POWER IS PERFECT BUT
WE'RE NOT MEANT TO BE.
WE'RE MEANT TO BE HUMAN, IN THE

806
00:26:40,566 --> 00:26:43,400
WE'RE NOT MEANT TO BE.
WE'RE MEANT TO BE HUMAN, IN THE
DUST AND THE IT D. FOR "ANGELS

807
00:26:43,402 --> 00:26:45,703
WE'RE MEANT TO BE HUMAN, IN THE
DUST AND THE IT D. FOR "ANGELS
IN AMERICA," EVERY RITUAL, I

808
00:26:45,705 --> 00:26:47,271
DUST AND THE IT D. FOR "ANGELS
IN AMERICA," EVERY RITUAL, I
WOULD PRAY BEFORE EVERY SHOW

809
00:26:47,273 --> 00:26:48,339
IN AMERICA," EVERY RITUAL, I
WOULD PRAY BEFORE EVERY SHOW
BECAUSE THAT SHOW AND THAT STORY

810
00:26:48,341 --> 00:26:51,675
WOULD PRAY BEFORE EVERY SHOW
BECAUSE THAT SHOW AND THAT STORY
IS SO MUCH ABOUT HONORING THE

811
00:26:51,677 --> 00:26:53,344
BECAUSE THAT SHOW AND THAT STORY
IS SO MUCH ABOUT HONORING THE
ANCESTORS, ESPECIALLY

812
00:26:53,346 --> 00:26:54,478
IS SO MUCH ABOUT HONORING THE
ANCESTORS, ESPECIALLY
SPECIFICALLY, YOU KNOW, GAY

813
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:57,081
ANCESTORS, ESPECIALLY
SPECIFICALLY, YOU KNOW, GAY
BROTHERS AND SISTERS WHO, YOU

814
00:26:57,083 --> 00:27:00,084
SPECIFICALLY, YOU KNOW, GAY
BROTHERS AND SISTERS WHO, YOU
KNOW, DIED AND FOUGHT DURING THE

815
00:27:00,086 --> 00:27:00,884
BROTHERS AND SISTERS WHO, YOU
KNOW, DIED AND FOUGHT DURING THE
AIDES EPIDEMIC, SPECIFICALLY

816
00:27:00,886 --> 00:27:02,353
KNOW, DIED AND FOUGHT DURING THE
AIDES EPIDEMIC, SPECIFICALLY
HERE IN NEW YORK BUT ALL AROUND

817
00:27:02,355 --> 00:27:03,087
AIDES EPIDEMIC, SPECIFICALLY
HERE IN NEW YORK BUT ALL AROUND
THE WORLD.

818
00:27:03,089 --> 00:27:05,589
HERE IN NEW YORK BUT ALL AROUND
THE WORLD.
SO I WOULD TRY TO COMMUNE, I

819
00:27:05,591 --> 00:27:07,891
THE WORLD.
SO I WOULD TRY TO COMMUNE, I
WOULD JUST SAY, USE ME, USE ME,

820
00:27:07,893 --> 00:27:10,394
SO I WOULD TRY TO COMMUNE, I
WOULD JUST SAY, USE ME, USE ME,
AND BE WITH ME HERE IN THE ROOM

821
00:27:10,396 --> 00:27:12,563
WOULD JUST SAY, USE ME, USE ME,
AND BE WITH ME HERE IN THE ROOM
AND LET ME HEAL YOU AS I TRY TOY

822
00:27:12,565 --> 00:27:14,231
AND BE WITH ME HERE IN THE ROOM
AND LET ME HEAL YOU AS I TRY TOY
HEAL MYSELF AND AN AUDIENCE AND

823
00:27:14,233 --> 00:27:16,567
AND LET ME HEAL YOU AS I TRY TOY
HEAL MYSELF AND AN AUDIENCE AND
USING THE WORDS OF THIS PLAY AND

824
00:27:16,569 --> 00:27:17,868
HEAL MYSELF AND AN AUDIENCE AND
USING THE WORDS OF THIS PLAY AND
THE IDEAS OF THIS PLAY.

825
00:27:17,870 --> 00:27:20,471
USING THE WORDS OF THIS PLAY AND
THE IDEAS OF THIS PLAY.
THERE'S NOTHING BETTER THAN

826
00:27:20,473 --> 00:27:22,873
THE IDEAS OF THIS PLAY.
THERE'S NOTHING BETTER THAN
FEELING LIKE YOU'RE SERVING

827
00:27:22,875 --> 00:27:24,575
THERE'S NOTHING BETTER THAN
FEELING LIKE YOU'RE SERVING
SOMETHING GREATER AND BEING

828
00:27:24,577 --> 00:27:24,775
FEELING LIKE YOU'RE SERVING
SOMETHING GREATER AND BEING
USED.

829
00:27:24,777 --> 00:27:26,276
SOMETHING GREATER AND BEING
USED.
I SEE YOU RUNNING OUT HERE AND

830
00:27:26,278 --> 00:27:27,678
USED.
I SEE YOU RUNNING OUT HERE AND
YOU GUYS PLAYING YOUR

831
00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:27,978
I SEE YOU RUNNING OUT HERE AND
YOU GUYS PLAYING YOUR
INSTRUMENTS.

832
00:27:27,980 --> 00:27:29,680
YOU GUYS PLAYING YOUR
INSTRUMENTS.
YOU LEAVE SPACE FOR GOD.

833
00:27:29,682 --> 00:27:31,115
INSTRUMENTS.
YOU LEAVE SPACE FOR GOD.
YOU LEAVE A LITTLE SPACE IN THE

834
00:27:31,117 --> 00:27:33,450
YOU LEAVE SPACE FOR GOD.
YOU LEAVE A LITTLE SPACE IN THE
TOP OF THE AUDITORIUM FOR

835
00:27:33,452 --> 00:27:34,785
YOU LEAVE A LITTLE SPACE IN THE
TOP OF THE AUDITORIUM FOR
SOMETHING DIVINE TO MOVE YOU AS

836
00:27:34,787 --> 00:27:35,653
TOP OF THE AUDITORIUM FOR
SOMETHING DIVINE TO MOVE YOU AS
YOU COME IN HERE.

837
00:27:35,655 --> 00:27:38,155
SOMETHING DIVINE TO MOVE YOU AS
YOU COME IN HERE.
I SEE IT IN WHAT YOU GUYS DO,

838
00:27:38,157 --> 00:27:38,355
YOU COME IN HERE.
I SEE IT IN WHAT YOU GUYS DO,
YEAH.

839
00:27:38,357 --> 00:27:39,857
I SEE IT IN WHAT YOU GUYS DO,
YEAH.
>> Stephen: THAT'S LOVELY.

840
00:27:39,859 --> 00:27:41,659
YEAH.
>> Stephen: THAT'S LOVELY.
THAT'S LOVELY TO BE SAID.

841
00:27:41,661 --> 00:27:46,263
>> Stephen: THAT'S LOVELY.
THAT'S LOVELY TO BE SAID.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

842
00:27:46,265 --> 00:27:49,333
THAT'S LOVELY TO BE SAID.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

843
00:27:49,335 --> 00:27:49,566
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.
>> WHAT.

844
00:27:49,568 --> 00:27:50,734
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.
>> WHAT.
>> Stephen: THAT MEANS GOD

845
00:27:50,736 --> 00:27:53,203
>> WHAT.
>> Stephen: THAT MEANS GOD
JUST WON A PEABODY.

846
00:27:53,205 --> 00:27:53,437
>> Stephen: THAT MEANS GOD
JUST WON A PEABODY.
>> HEY!

847
00:27:53,439 --> 00:27:56,340
JUST WON A PEABODY.
>> HEY!
>> Stephen: CONGRATULATIONS,

848
00:27:56,342 --> 00:27:57,441
>> HEY!
>> Stephen: CONGRATULATIONS,
LONG OVERDUE.

849
00:27:57,443 --> 00:27:58,375
>> Stephen: CONGRATULATIONS,
LONG OVERDUE.
>> GOD'S FIRST PEABODY.

850
00:27:58,377 --> 00:27:58,676
LONG OVERDUE.
>> GOD'S FIRST PEABODY.
( LAUGHTER )

851
00:27:58,678 --> 00:28:00,644
>> GOD'S FIRST PEABODY.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: YOU'RE SUPER BUSY

852
00:28:00,646 --> 00:28:01,111
( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: YOU'RE SUPER BUSY
THIS COMING FALL.

853
00:28:01,113 --> 00:28:03,614
>> Stephen: YOU'RE SUPER BUSY
THIS COMING FALL.
YOU HAVE TWO MOVIES.

854
00:28:03,616 --> 00:28:03,881
THIS COMING FALL.
YOU HAVE TWO MOVIES.
>> MM-HMM.

855
00:28:03,883 --> 00:28:04,515
YOU HAVE TWO MOVIES.
>> MM-HMM.
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE "THE EYES

856
00:28:04,517 --> 00:28:05,983
>> MM-HMM.
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE "THE EYES
OF TAMMY FAYE," WHERE YOU

857
00:28:05,985 --> 00:28:08,052
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE "THE EYES
OF TAMMY FAYE," WHERE YOU
PLAY -- JUST THE TRAILER ALONE

858
00:28:08,054 --> 00:28:09,687
OF TAMMY FAYE," WHERE YOU
PLAY -- JUST THE TRAILER ALONE
IS KILLING ME -- YOU PLAY JIM

859
00:28:09,689 --> 00:28:10,854
PLAY -- JUST THE TRAILER ALONE
IS KILLING ME -- YOU PLAY JIM
BAKER.

860
00:28:10,856 --> 00:28:11,088
IS KILLING ME -- YOU PLAY JIM
BAKER.
>> YEAH.

861
00:28:11,090 --> 00:28:13,557
BAKER.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: AND JESSICA

862
00:28:13,559 --> 00:28:15,292
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: AND JESSICA
CHASTAIN PLAYS TAMMY FAYE.

863
00:28:15,294 --> 00:28:15,526
>> Stephen: AND JESSICA
CHASTAIN PLAYS TAMMY FAYE.
>> YEAH.

864
00:28:15,528 --> 00:28:16,593
CHASTAIN PLAYS TAMMY FAYE.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: EXTRAORDINARY.

865
00:28:16,595 --> 00:28:19,663
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: EXTRAORDINARY.
>> Stephen: YOU'VE PLAYED A

866
00:28:19,665 --> 00:28:21,699
>> Stephen: EXTRAORDINARY.
>> Stephen: YOU'VE PLAYED A
JESUIT PRIEST TRYING TO BRING

867
00:28:21,701 --> 00:28:24,668
>> Stephen: YOU'VE PLAYED A
JESUIT PRIEST TRYING TO BRING
CHRISTIANITY TO JAPAN, A SEVENTH

868
00:28:24,670 --> 00:28:26,737
JESUIT PRIEST TRYING TO BRING
CHRISTIANITY TO JAPAN, A SEVENTH
DAY ADVENTIST GOING TO WAR AS A

869
00:28:26,739 --> 00:28:28,372
CHRISTIANITY TO JAPAN, A SEVENTH
DAY ADVENTIST GOING TO WAR AS A
CONSCIENTIOUS PROJECTOR, HOW DID

870
00:28:28,374 --> 00:28:32,076
DAY ADVENTIST GOING TO WAR AS A
CONSCIENTIOUS PROJECTOR, HOW DID
THAT PREPARE YOU IN ANY WAY TO

871
00:28:32,078 --> 00:28:36,647
CONSCIENTIOUS PROJECTOR, HOW DID
THAT PREPARE YOU IN ANY WAY TO
PLAY TELEVANGELIST?

872
00:28:36,649 --> 00:28:37,648
THAT PREPARE YOU IN ANY WAY TO
PLAY TELEVANGELIST?
( LAUGHTER )

873
00:28:37,650 --> 00:28:38,682
PLAY TELEVANGELIST?
( LAUGHTER )
>> STICKY QUESTION.

874
00:28:38,684 --> 00:28:38,982
( LAUGHTER )
>> STICKY QUESTION.
( LAUGHTER )

875
00:28:38,984 --> 00:28:40,818
>> STICKY QUESTION.
( LAUGHTER )
BECAUSE MY JOB AS AN ACTOR IS

876
00:28:40,820 --> 00:28:42,986
( LAUGHTER )
BECAUSE MY JOB AS AN ACTOR IS
NOT TO JUDGE THE CHARACTERS I'M

877
00:28:42,988 --> 00:28:43,620
BECAUSE MY JOB AS AN ACTOR IS
NOT TO JUDGE THE CHARACTERS I'M
PLAYING, RIGHT.

878
00:28:43,622 --> 00:28:44,154
NOT TO JUDGE THE CHARACTERS I'M
PLAYING, RIGHT.
>> Stephen: SURE.

879
00:28:44,156 --> 00:28:46,056
PLAYING, RIGHT.
>> Stephen: SURE.
YOU HAVE TO FIND SOME PART OF

880
00:28:46,058 --> 00:28:47,224
>> Stephen: SURE.
YOU HAVE TO FIND SOME PART OF
THEM THAT --

881
00:28:47,226 --> 00:28:47,458
YOU HAVE TO FIND SOME PART OF
THEM THAT --
>> YEAH.

882
00:28:47,460 --> 00:28:48,592
THEM THAT --
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: -- THAT YOU ARE ON

883
00:28:48,594 --> 00:28:50,027
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: -- THAT YOU ARE ON
THEIR SIDE BECAUSE YOU ARE THEM.

884
00:28:50,029 --> 00:28:51,862
>> Stephen: -- THAT YOU ARE ON
THEIR SIDE BECAUSE YOU ARE THEM.
>> ONE OF THE REASONS JIM

885
00:28:51,864 --> 00:28:54,732
THEIR SIDE BECAUSE YOU ARE THEM.
>> ONE OF THE REASONS JIM
BAKER -- AND YOU KNOW, FIRST OF

886
00:28:54,734 --> 00:28:56,100
>> ONE OF THE REASONS JIM
BAKER -- AND YOU KNOW, FIRST OF
ALL, JESSICA HAS BEEN WORKING ON

887
00:28:56,102 --> 00:28:59,269
BAKER -- AND YOU KNOW, FIRST OF
ALL, JESSICA HAS BEEN WORKING ON
THIS A NUMBER OF YEARS, THIS IS

888
00:28:59,271 --> 00:29:01,271
ALL, JESSICA HAS BEEN WORKING ON
THIS A NUMBER OF YEARS, THIS IS
A REAL PASSION PROJECT FOR HER.

889
00:29:01,273 --> 00:29:03,640
THIS A NUMBER OF YEARS, THIS IS
A REAL PASSION PROJECT FOR HER.
SHE'S REMARKABLE IN THE FILM AND

890
00:29:03,642 --> 00:29:05,042
A REAL PASSION PROJECT FOR HER.
SHE'S REMARKABLE IN THE FILM AND
TRANSFORMATIVE AND DEEPLY

891
00:29:05,044 --> 00:29:06,577
SHE'S REMARKABLE IN THE FILM AND
TRANSFORMATIVE AND DEEPLY
SPECIAL AND HONORS TAMMY.

892
00:29:06,579 --> 00:29:09,680
TRANSFORMATIVE AND DEEPLY
SPECIAL AND HONORS TAMMY.
I LITERALLY GOT A TEXT FROM JIM

893
00:29:09,682 --> 00:29:11,548
SPECIAL AND HONORS TAMMY.
I LITERALLY GOT A TEXT FROM JIM
AND TAMMY'S SON JAY BAKER BEFORE

894
00:29:11,550 --> 00:29:14,485
I LITERALLY GOT A TEXT FROM JIM
AND TAMMY'S SON JAY BAKER BEFORE
I CAME ON STAGE TONIGHT AND SAID

895
00:29:14,487 --> 00:29:16,353
AND TAMMY'S SON JAY BAKER BEFORE
I CAME ON STAGE TONIGHT AND SAID
THANK YOU FOR HELPING TO SHOW

896
00:29:16,355 --> 00:29:18,222
I CAME ON STAGE TONIGHT AND SAID
THANK YOU FOR HELPING TO SHOW
THE WORLD THAT MY FATHER IS

897
00:29:18,224 --> 00:29:20,524
THANK YOU FOR HELPING TO SHOW
THE WORLD THAT MY FATHER IS
HUMAN AND GIVING HIM MORE

898
00:29:20,526 --> 00:29:21,959
THE WORLD THAT MY FATHER IS
HUMAN AND GIVING HIM MORE
DIMENSION THAN PEOPLE WOULD

899
00:29:21,961 --> 00:29:22,192
HUMAN AND GIVING HIM MORE
DIMENSION THAN PEOPLE WOULD
EXPECT.

900
00:29:22,194 --> 00:29:24,228
DIMENSION THAN PEOPLE WOULD
EXPECT.
>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A

901
00:29:24,230 --> 00:29:25,195
EXPECT.
>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A
QUICK COMMERCIAL BREAK.

902
00:29:25,197 --> 00:29:26,163
>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A
QUICK COMMERCIAL BREAK.
DON'T GO ANYWHERE BEC

903
00:29:31,936 --> 00:29:33,637
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WELCOME BACK!

904
00:29:33,639 --> 00:29:35,806
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WELCOME BACK!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

905
00:29:35,808 --> 00:29:38,776
WELCOME BACK!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
WE'RE HERE WITH THE YOUNG AND

906
00:29:38,778 --> 00:29:39,977
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
WE'RE HERE WITH THE YOUNG AND
TALENTED AROUND AROUND RESPECT

907
00:29:39,979 --> 00:29:47,017
WE'RE HERE WITH THE YOUNG AND
TALENTED AROUND AROUND RESPECT
YOU'RE ALSO -- TALENTED ANDREW

908
00:29:47,019 --> 00:29:47,985
TALENTED AROUND AROUND RESPECT
YOU'RE ALSO -- TALENTED ANDREW
GARFIELD.

909
00:29:47,987 --> 00:29:51,722
YOU'RE ALSO -- TALENTED ANDREW
GARFIELD.
YOU'RE IN "TICK TICK BOOM!"

910
00:29:51,724 --> 00:29:55,425
GARFIELD.
YOU'RE IN "TICK TICK BOOM!"
DIRECTED BY LIN-MANUEL MIRANDA.

911
00:29:55,427 --> 00:29:55,659
YOU'RE IN "TICK TICK BOOM!"
DIRECTED BY LIN-MANUEL MIRANDA.
>> YES.

912
00:29:55,661 --> 00:29:56,226
DIRECTED BY LIN-MANUEL MIRANDA.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE A

913
00:29:56,228 --> 00:29:57,427
>> YES.
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE A
BEAUTIFUL SINGING VOICE.

914
00:29:57,429 --> 00:30:01,098
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE A
BEAUTIFUL SINGING VOICE.
WE DID NOT KNOW THIS.

915
00:30:01,100 --> 00:30:02,232
BEAUTIFUL SINGING VOICE.
WE DID NOT KNOW THIS.
WHY HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING YOUR

916
00:30:02,234 --> 00:30:03,934
WE DID NOT KNOW THIS.
WHY HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING YOUR
LIGHT UNDER A BUSHEL?

917
00:30:03,936 --> 00:30:04,434
WHY HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING YOUR
LIGHT UNDER A BUSHEL?
>> IT'S NOT THAT.

918
00:30:04,436 --> 00:30:05,135
LIGHT UNDER A BUSHEL?
>> IT'S NOT THAT.
THE JURY IS STILL OUT.

919
00:30:05,137 --> 00:30:07,371
>> IT'S NOT THAT.
THE JURY IS STILL OUT.
>> Stephen: NO, THE JURY IS

920
00:30:07,373 --> 00:30:07,538
THE JURY IS STILL OUT.
>> Stephen: NO, THE JURY IS
IN.

921
00:30:07,540 --> 00:30:08,071
>> Stephen: NO, THE JURY IS
IN.
WE'VE SEEN THE CLIPS.

922
00:30:08,073 --> 00:30:13,577
IN.
WE'VE SEEN THE CLIPS.
YOU HAVE A BEAUTIFUL SINGING

923
00:30:13,579 --> 00:30:13,777
WE'VE SEEN THE CLIPS.
YOU HAVE A BEAUTIFUL SINGING
VOICE.

924
00:30:13,779 --> 00:30:14,978
YOU HAVE A BEAUTIFUL SINGING
VOICE.
>> THAT'S VERY NICE.

925
00:30:14,980 --> 00:30:16,380
VOICE.
>> THAT'S VERY NICE.
THE COURT OF PUBLIC OPINION WILL

926
00:30:16,382 --> 00:30:17,381
>> THAT'S VERY NICE.
THE COURT OF PUBLIC OPINION WILL
PROVE YOU RIGHT OR WRONG.

927
00:30:17,383 --> 00:30:19,349
THE COURT OF PUBLIC OPINION WILL
PROVE YOU RIGHT OR WRONG.
YOU CAN PUT ME IN THE STOCKS AND

928
00:30:19,351 --> 00:30:21,251
PROVE YOU RIGHT OR WRONG.
YOU CAN PUT ME IN THE STOCKS AND
THROW ROTTEN TOMATOES AT ME IF

929
00:30:21,253 --> 00:30:22,619
YOU CAN PUT ME IN THE STOCKS AND
THROW ROTTEN TOMATOES AT ME IF
IT'S NOT TO YOUR LIKING.

930
00:30:22,621 --> 00:30:25,055
THROW ROTTEN TOMATOES AT ME IF
IT'S NOT TO YOUR LIKING.
NO, I'M SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS.

931
00:30:25,057 --> 00:30:27,157
IT'S NOT TO YOUR LIKING.
NO, I'M SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS.
SO, NO, I'VE NEVER SUNG BEFORE.

932
00:30:27,159 --> 00:30:28,625
NO, I'M SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS.
SO, NO, I'VE NEVER SUNG BEFORE.
I'VE NEVER SUNG BEFORE.

933
00:30:28,627 --> 00:30:31,094
SO, NO, I'VE NEVER SUNG BEFORE.
I'VE NEVER SUNG BEFORE.
IT WAS KIND OF A SHOT IN THE

934
00:30:31,096 --> 00:30:33,030
I'VE NEVER SUNG BEFORE.
IT WAS KIND OF A SHOT IN THE
DARK, BUT FUNNY ENOUGH, HOW IT

935
00:30:33,032 --> 00:30:35,966
IT WAS KIND OF A SHOT IN THE
DARK, BUT FUNNY ENOUGH, HOW IT
CAME ABOUT IS THERE'S A MAN

936
00:30:35,968 --> 00:30:39,870
DARK, BUT FUNNY ENOUGH, HOW IT
CAME ABOUT IS THERE'S A MAN
NAMED GREG MIELE, AND HE IS THE

937
00:30:39,872 --> 00:30:45,175
CAME ABOUT IS THERE'S A MAN
NAMED GREG MIELE, AND HE IS THE
GLUE THAT BINDS ALL OF BROADWAY

938
00:30:45,177 --> 00:30:48,979
NAMED GREG MIELE, AND HE IS THE
GLUE THAT BINDS ALL OF BROADWAY
MUSICAL THEATER -- DANCERS,

939
00:30:48,981 --> 00:30:50,113
GLUE THAT BINDS ALL OF BROADWAY
MUSICAL THEATER -- DANCERS,
PERFORMERS, THEATERS IN THE

940
00:30:50,115 --> 00:30:50,314
MUSICAL THEATER -- DANCERS,
PERFORMERS, THEATERS IN THE
CITY.

941
00:30:50,316 --> 00:30:53,016
PERFORMERS, THEATERS IN THE
CITY.
HE'S AN INVISIBLE SOURCE, A

942
00:30:53,018 --> 00:30:53,851
CITY.
HE'S AN INVISIBLE SOURCE, A
MASSAGE THERAPIST.

943
00:30:53,853 --> 00:30:56,286
HE'S AN INVISIBLE SOURCE, A
MASSAGE THERAPIST.
HE'S ONE OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS.

944
00:30:56,288 --> 00:30:58,655
MASSAGE THERAPIST.
HE'S ONE OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS.
HE WORKS ON ME AND LYNN.

945
00:30:58,657 --> 00:31:02,726
HE'S ONE OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS.
HE WORKS ON ME AND LYNN.
ONE DAY LIN'S ON HIS TABLE AND

946
00:31:02,728 --> 00:31:04,461
HE WORKS ON ME AND LYNN.
ONE DAY LIN'S ON HIS TABLE AND
GETTING THE CRAP KICKED OUT OF

947
00:31:04,463 --> 00:31:07,531
ONE DAY LIN'S ON HIS TABLE AND
GETTING THE CRAP KICKED OUT OF
HIM BECAUSE GREG IS PUMMELING

948
00:31:07,533 --> 00:31:10,067
GETTING THE CRAP KICKED OUT OF
HIM BECAUSE GREG IS PUMMELING
PEOPLE AND HURTING THEM FOR

949
00:31:10,069 --> 00:31:11,034
HIM BECAUSE GREG IS PUMMELING
PEOPLE AND HURTING THEM FOR
MONEY AND WE PAY.

950
00:31:11,036 --> 00:31:12,469
PEOPLE AND HURTING THEM FOR
MONEY AND WE PAY.
( LAUGHTER )

951
00:31:12,471 --> 00:31:15,305
MONEY AND WE PAY.
( LAUGHTER )
BASICALLY, LIN GO, AAAHHH!

952
00:31:15,307 --> 00:31:17,274
( LAUGHTER )
BASICALLY, LIN GO, AAAHHH!
CAN ANDREW GARFIELD SING?

953
00:31:17,276 --> 00:31:23,013
BASICALLY, LIN GO, AAAHHH!
CAN ANDREW GARFIELD SING?
AND GREG GOES, HE'S AN ANGEL!

954
00:31:23,015 --> 00:31:29,019
CAN ANDREW GARFIELD SING?
AND GREG GOES, HE'S AN ANGEL!
IT'S PAVAROTTI, ARIANNA GRANDI

955
00:31:29,021 --> 00:31:31,955
AND GREG GOES, HE'S AN ANGEL!
IT'S PAVAROTTI, ARIANNA GRANDI
AND THEN THERE'S THE TENSION

956
00:31:31,957 --> 00:31:34,358
IT'S PAVAROTTI, ARIANNA GRANDI
AND THEN THERE'S THE TENSION
HOLDING IT TOGETHER.

957
00:31:34,360 --> 00:31:36,627
AND THEN THERE'S THE TENSION
HOLDING IT TOGETHER.
AND LIN CALLS AND SAYS, HEY, AN

958
00:31:36,629 --> 00:31:38,195
HOLDING IT TOGETHER.
AND LIN CALLS AND SAYS, HEY, AN
DI, CAN YOU SING?

959
00:31:38,197 --> 00:31:39,129
AND LIN CALLS AND SAYS, HEY, AN
DI, CAN YOU SING?
( LAUGHTER )

960
00:31:39,131 --> 00:31:41,031
DI, CAN YOU SING?
( LAUGHTER )
NO, NO, NOW LIN THINKS YOU CAN

961
00:31:41,033 --> 00:31:43,934
( LAUGHTER )
NO, NO, NOW LIN THINKS YOU CAN
SING AND IT'S IMPORTANT YOU CAN

962
00:31:43,936 --> 00:31:45,569
NO, NO, NOW LIN THINKS YOU CAN
SING AND IT'S IMPORTANT YOU CAN
SING BUZZ MY REPUTATION IS ON

963
00:31:45,571 --> 00:31:47,971
SING AND IT'S IMPORTANT YOU CAN
SING BUZZ MY REPUTATION IS ON
THE LINE.

964
00:31:47,973 --> 00:31:49,406
SING BUZZ MY REPUTATION IS ON
THE LINE.
I'M, LIKE, OKAY.

965
00:31:49,408 --> 00:31:51,375
THE LINE.
I'M, LIKE, OKAY.
THEN LIN TALKS TO ME AND WE END

966
00:31:51,377 --> 00:31:54,278
I'M, LIKE, OKAY.
THEN LIN TALKS TO ME AND WE END
UP TALKING AND HE SAYS GREG SAYS

967
00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:55,379
THEN LIN TALKS TO ME AND WE END
UP TALKING AND HE SAYS GREG SAYS
YOU CAN SING, WHEN DO YOU WANT

968
00:31:55,381 --> 00:31:56,613
UP TALKING AND HE SAYS GREG SAYS
YOU CAN SING, WHEN DO YOU WANT
TO SHOOT?

969
00:31:56,615 --> 00:31:58,382
YOU CAN SING, WHEN DO YOU WANT
TO SHOOT?
AND LIN SAYS, NOT WITHIN THE

970
00:31:58,384 --> 00:31:58,582
TO SHOOT?
AND LIN SAYS, NOT WITHIN THE
YEAR.

971
00:31:58,584 --> 00:32:01,752
AND LIN SAYS, NOT WITHIN THE
YEAR.
I SAID, YEAH, YEAH, I CAN SING.

972
00:32:01,754 --> 00:32:02,119
YEAR.
I SAID, YEAH, YEAH, I CAN SING.
I CAN SING.

973
00:32:02,121 --> 00:32:03,353
I SAID, YEAH, YEAH, I CAN SING.
I CAN SING.
>> Stephen: THAT'S GREAT.

974
00:32:03,355 --> 00:32:06,123
I CAN SING.
>> Stephen: THAT'S GREAT.
ALWAYS SAY YES, IF THEY ASK YOU

975
00:32:06,125 --> 00:32:07,824
>> Stephen: THAT'S GREAT.
ALWAYS SAY YES, IF THEY ASK YOU
TO DO SOMETHING.

976
00:32:07,826 --> 00:32:08,058
ALWAYS SAY YES, IF THEY ASK YOU
TO DO SOMETHING.
>> SURE.

977
00:32:08,060 --> 00:32:10,727
TO DO SOMETHING.
>> SURE.
>> Stephen: I UNDERSTUDIED FOR

978
00:32:10,729 --> 00:32:13,096
>> SURE.
>> Stephen: I UNDERSTUDIED FOR
STEVE CARELL ONCE AND HE PLAYS

979
00:32:13,098 --> 00:32:14,765
>> Stephen: I UNDERSTUDIED FOR
STEVE CARELL ONCE AND HE PLAYS
THE BARITONE HORN AND I'VE NEVER

980
00:32:14,767 --> 00:32:16,400
STEVE CARELL ONCE AND HE PLAYS
THE BARITONE HORN AND I'VE NEVER
PICKED UP A BRASS INSTRUMENT IN

981
00:32:16,402 --> 00:32:19,102
THE BARITONE HORN AND I'VE NEVER
PICKED UP A BRASS INSTRUMENT IN
MY LIFE AND HE SAID CAN YOU PLAY

982
00:32:19,104 --> 00:32:20,637
PICKED UP A BRASS INSTRUMENT IN
MY LIFE AND HE SAID CAN YOU PLAY
THE BARITONE HORN AND I SAID,

983
00:32:20,639 --> 00:32:22,873
MY LIFE AND HE SAID CAN YOU PLAY
THE BARITONE HORN AND I SAID,
YES, I CAN, AND SIX DAYS LATER I

984
00:32:22,875 --> 00:32:25,776
THE BARITONE HORN AND I SAID,
YES, I CAN, AND SIX DAYS LATER I
PLAYED IT ON STAGE.

985
00:32:25,778 --> 00:32:27,511
YES, I CAN, AND SIX DAYS LATER I
PLAYED IT ON STAGE.
>> NECESSITY'S THE MOTHER OF --

986
00:32:27,513 --> 00:32:27,911
PLAYED IT ON STAGE.
>> NECESSITY'S THE MOTHER OF --
WHAT IS IT?

987
00:32:27,913 --> 00:32:31,982
>> NECESSITY'S THE MOTHER OF --
WHAT IS IT?
>> Stephen: OF EMPLOYMENT.

988
00:32:31,984 --> 00:32:32,516
WHAT IS IT?
>> Stephen: OF EMPLOYMENT.
YEAH!

989
00:32:32,518 --> 00:32:34,451
>> Stephen: OF EMPLOYMENT.
YEAH!
( LAUGHTER )

990
00:32:34,453 --> 00:32:34,952
YEAH!
( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

991
00:32:34,954 --> 00:32:35,585
( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> STEPHEN: "THE EYES OF TAMMY

992
00:32:35,587 --> 00:32:36,019
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> STEPHEN: "THE EYES OF TAMMY
FAYE" IS IN THEATERS

993
00:32:36,021 --> 00:32:37,020
>> STEPHEN: "THE EYES OF TAMMY
FAYE" IS IN THEATERS
SEPTEMBER 17TH, AND "TICK TICK

994
00:32:37,022 --> 00:32:37,321
FAYE" IS IN THEATERS
SEPTEMBER 17TH, AND "TICK TICK
BOOM" IS IN

995
00:32:37,323 --> 00:32:38,956
SEPTEMBER 17TH, AND "TICK TICK
BOOM" IS IN
THEATERS AND ON NETFLIX LATER

996
00:32:38,958 --> 00:32:39,990
BOOM" IS IN
THEATERS AND ON NETFLIX LATER
THIS FALL.

997
00:32:39,992 --> 00:32:40,557
THEATERS AND ON NETFLIX LATER
THIS FALL.
ANDREW GARFIELD, EVERYBODY!

998
00:32:40,559 --> 00:32:43,493
THIS FALL.
ANDREW GARFIELD, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH LORDE.

999
00:32:49,467 --> 00:32:54,604
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪

1000
00:33:11,823 --> 00:33:15,492
>> RALPH KNOWS ME WELL ENOUGH TO
KNOW THE INTRODUCTION I PREFER
IS A LITTLE BIT SHORTER.

1001
00:33:15,494 --> 00:33:16,793
KNOW THE INTRODUCTION I PREFER
IS A LITTLE BIT SHORTER.
>> HOW DID YOU READ ME A

1002
00:33:16,795 --> 00:33:19,029
IS A LITTLE BIT SHORTER.
>> HOW DID YOU READ ME A
THOUSAND TIMES AND NOT PICK UP

1003
00:33:19,031 --> 00:33:20,397
>> HOW DID YOU READ ME A
THOUSAND TIMES AND NOT PICK UP
ONE LESSON ABOUT THE PRICE

1004
00:33:20,399 --> 00:33:22,299
THOUSAND TIMES AND NOT PICK UP
ONE LESSON ABOUT THE PRICE
YOU'RE SELLING YOUR SOUL FOR

1005
00:33:22,301 --> 00:33:22,666
ONE LESSON ABOUT THE PRICE
YOU'RE SELLING YOUR SOUL FOR
POWER.

1006
00:33:22,668 --> 00:33:25,002
YOU'RE SELLING YOUR SOUL FOR
POWER.
IT'S, LIKE, EVERY STORY IN ME.

1007
00:33:25,004 --> 00:33:26,636
POWER.
IT'S, LIKE, EVERY STORY IN ME.
HERE AND HERE AND HERE.

1008
00:33:26,638 --> 00:33:28,138
IT'S, LIKE, EVERY STORY IN ME.
HERE AND HERE AND HERE.
IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT APPLES.

1009
00:33:28,140 --> 00:33:29,840
HERE AND HERE AND HERE.
IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT APPLES.
IT'S GOT A PAR

1010
00:33:37,181 --> 00:33:43,587
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪
>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK,

1011
00:33:43,589 --> 00:33:43,854
♪♪
>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK,
EVERYBODY!

1012
00:33:43,856 --> 00:33:44,788
>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK,
EVERYBODY!
MY NEXT GUEST IS A HUGELY

1013
00:33:44,790 --> 00:33:45,355
EVERYBODY!
MY NEXT GUEST IS A HUGELY
POPULAR GRAMMY AWARD-WINNING

1014
00:33:45,357 --> 00:33:45,922
MY NEXT GUEST IS A HUGELY
POPULAR GRAMMY AWARD-WINNING
SINGER-SONGWRITER WHO HAILS

1015
00:33:45,924 --> 00:33:49,559
POPULAR GRAMMY AWARD-WINNING
SINGER-SONGWRITER WHO HAILS
FROM NEW ZEALAND.

1016
00:33:49,561 --> 00:33:50,027
SINGER-SONGWRITER WHO HAILS
FROM NEW ZEALAND.
PLEASE WELCOME, FOR A

1017
00:33:50,029 --> 00:33:52,729
FROM NEW ZEALAND.
PLEASE WELCOME, FOR A
RARE NOT-IN-THE-THEATER

1018
00:33:52,731 --> 00:33:57,634
PLEASE WELCOME, FOR A
RARE NOT-IN-THE-THEATER
INTERVIEW, LORDE!

1019
00:33:57,636 --> 00:33:58,568
RARE NOT-IN-THE-THEATER
INTERVIEW, LORDE!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

1020
00:33:58,570 --> 00:34:00,470
INTERVIEW, LORDE!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LORDE, GOOD TO SEE YOU UP ON THE

1021
00:34:00,472 --> 00:34:00,904
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LORDE, GOOD TO SEE YOU UP ON THE
BIG SCREEN HERE.

1022
00:34:00,906 --> 00:34:05,609
LORDE, GOOD TO SEE YOU UP ON THE
BIG SCREEN HERE.
IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

1023
00:34:05,611 --> 00:34:10,047
BIG SCREEN HERE.
IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
WE MET IN THE PRIME MINISTER'S

1024
00:34:10,049 --> 00:34:12,849
IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
WE MET IN THE PRIME MINISTER'S
BACKYARD DOWN IN AUCKLAND,

1025
00:34:12,851 --> 00:34:14,251
WE MET IN THE PRIME MINISTER'S
BACKYARD DOWN IN AUCKLAND,
ACTUALLY, IN 2019.

1026
00:34:14,253 --> 00:34:16,720
BACKYARD DOWN IN AUCKLAND,
ACTUALLY, IN 2019.
WHAT DO YOU REMEMBER ABOUT THAT

1027
00:34:16,722 --> 00:34:20,190
ACTUALLY, IN 2019.
WHAT DO YOU REMEMBER ABOUT THAT
DAY?

1028
00:34:20,192 --> 00:34:21,024
WHAT DO YOU REMEMBER ABOUT THAT
DAY?
>> UM, I REMEMBER YOU TERRIFYING

1029
00:34:21,026 --> 00:34:22,559
DAY?
>> UM, I REMEMBER YOU TERRIFYING
ME WITH SOME SORT OF PRANK, SO

1030
00:34:22,561 --> 00:34:24,494
>> UM, I REMEMBER YOU TERRIFYING
ME WITH SOME SORT OF PRANK, SO
THANK YOU FOR THAT.

1031
00:34:24,496 --> 00:34:26,129
ME WITH SOME SORT OF PRANK, SO
THANK YOU FOR THAT.
>> Stephen: YOU'RE WELCOME.

1032
00:34:26,131 --> 00:34:27,631
THANK YOU FOR THAT.
>> Stephen: YOU'RE WELCOME.
I WILL SHARE THAT WITH THE

1033
00:34:27,633 --> 00:34:27,898
>> Stephen: YOU'RE WELCOME.
I WILL SHARE THAT WITH THE
AUDIENCE.

1034
00:34:27,900 --> 00:34:29,433
I WILL SHARE THAT WITH THE
AUDIENCE.
WE HAVE A CLIP OF ME DOING THAT,

1035
00:34:29,435 --> 00:34:29,933
AUDIENCE.
WE HAVE A CLIP OF ME DOING THAT,
I BELIEVE.

1036
00:34:29,935 --> 00:34:32,235
WE HAVE A CLIP OF ME DOING THAT,
I BELIEVE.
SO NICE TO MEET YOU, HELLO.

1037
00:34:32,237 --> 00:34:32,602
I BELIEVE.
SO NICE TO MEET YOU, HELLO.
>> YOU, TOO.

1038
00:34:32,604 --> 00:34:34,571
SO NICE TO MEET YOU, HELLO.
>> YOU, TOO.
>> Stephen: I'VE NEVER MET YOU

1039
00:34:34,573 --> 00:34:36,406
>> YOU, TOO.
>> Stephen: I'VE NEVER MET YOU
BEFORE, SINCE WE'RE FAMOUS AND

1040
00:34:36,408 --> 00:34:38,408
>> Stephen: I'VE NEVER MET YOU
BEFORE, SINCE WE'RE FAMOUS AND
THAT'S GENERALLY HOW PEOPLE

1041
00:34:38,410 --> 00:34:38,608
BEFORE, SINCE WE'RE FAMOUS AND
THAT'S GENERALLY HOW PEOPLE
MEET.

1042
00:34:38,610 --> 00:34:40,677
THAT'S GENERALLY HOW PEOPLE
MEET.
SOMETHING I ALWAYS WANTED TO ASK

1043
00:34:40,679 --> 00:34:43,013
MEET.
SOMETHING I ALWAYS WANTED TO ASK
YOU, WOULD YOU CARE FOR SOME

1044
00:34:43,015 --> 00:34:43,447
SOMETHING I ALWAYS WANTED TO ASK
YOU, WOULD YOU CARE FOR SOME
PEANUT BRITTLE?

1045
00:34:43,449 --> 00:34:45,649
YOU, WOULD YOU CARE FOR SOME
PEANUT BRITTLE?
WOULD YOU LIKE SOME PEANUT

1046
00:34:45,651 --> 00:34:46,750
PEANUT BRITTLE?
WOULD YOU LIKE SOME PEANUT
BRITTLE?

1047
00:34:46,752 --> 00:34:47,551
WOULD YOU LIKE SOME PEANUT
BRITTLE?
>> SURE, THANK YOU.

1048
00:34:47,553 --> 00:34:49,986
BRITTLE?
>> SURE, THANK YOU.
IT MUST BE A TRADITION.

1049
00:34:49,988 --> 00:34:51,521
>> SURE, THANK YOU.
IT MUST BE A TRADITION.
>> Stephen: YEAH.

1050
00:34:51,523 --> 00:34:52,556
IT MUST BE A TRADITION.
>> Stephen: YEAH.
THANK YOU.

1051
00:34:52,558 --> 00:34:57,127
>> Stephen: YEAH.
THANK YOU.
>> Stephen: TOUCH.

1052
00:34:57,129 --> 00:34:57,360
THANK YOU.
>> Stephen: TOUCH.
AAAHHH!

1053
00:34:57,362 --> 00:34:58,528
>> Stephen: TOUCH.
AAAHHH!
OH, MY GOD!

1054
00:34:58,530 --> 00:34:58,829
AAAHHH!
OH, MY GOD!
( LAUGHTER )

1055
00:34:58,831 --> 00:34:59,129
OH, MY GOD!
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )

1056
00:34:59,131 --> 00:35:04,534
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: YOU DON'T HAVE

1057
00:35:04,536 --> 00:35:04,768
( APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: YOU DON'T HAVE
SNAKES!

1058
00:35:04,770 --> 00:35:06,203
>> Stephen: YOU DON'T HAVE
SNAKES!
( LAUGHTER )

1059
00:35:06,205 --> 00:35:08,071
SNAKES!
( LAUGHTER )
>> I CLEARLY DID NOT WANT THAT

1060
00:35:08,073 --> 00:35:08,505
( LAUGHTER )
>> I CLEARLY DID NOT WANT THAT
PEANUT BRITTLE.

1061
00:35:08,507 --> 00:35:09,973
>> I CLEARLY DID NOT WANT THAT
PEANUT BRITTLE.
I WAS, LIKE, UM, OKAY.

1062
00:35:09,975 --> 00:35:10,740
PEANUT BRITTLE.
I WAS, LIKE, UM, OKAY.
>> Stephen: YOU WERE BEING

1063
00:35:10,742 --> 00:35:14,978
I WAS, LIKE, UM, OKAY.
>> Stephen: YOU WERE BEING
NICE TO ME, AND I PRANKED YOU.

1064
00:35:14,980 --> 00:35:16,379
>> Stephen: YOU WERE BEING
NICE TO ME, AND I PRANKED YOU.
DO YOU FORGIVE ME?

1065
00:35:16,381 --> 00:35:18,515
NICE TO ME, AND I PRANKED YOU.
DO YOU FORGIVE ME?
>> YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, WE'LL GET

1066
00:35:18,517 --> 00:35:19,316
DO YOU FORGIVE ME?
>> YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, WE'LL GET
THERE, STEPHEN.

1067
00:35:19,318 --> 00:35:23,653
>> YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, WE'LL GET
THERE, STEPHEN.
>> Stephen: I FELT BAD I HAD

1068
00:35:23,655 --> 00:35:24,988
THERE, STEPHEN.
>> Stephen: I FELT BAD I HAD
FLOWN 12,000 MILES AND I HAD TO

1069
00:35:24,990 --> 00:35:26,490
>> Stephen: I FELT BAD I HAD
FLOWN 12,000 MILES AND I HAD TO
GO THROUGH WITH THE BIT.

1070
00:35:26,492 --> 00:35:26,857
FLOWN 12,000 MILES AND I HAD TO
GO THROUGH WITH THE BIT.
( LAUGHTER )

1071
00:35:26,859 --> 00:35:28,358
GO THROUGH WITH THE BIT.
( LAUGHTER )
HERE'S THE INTERESTING THING,

1072
00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:29,659
( LAUGHTER )
HERE'S THE INTERESTING THING,
THERE YOU ARE, IS THIS A COMMON

1073
00:35:29,661 --> 00:35:32,429
HERE'S THE INTERESTING THING,
THERE YOU ARE, IS THIS A COMMON
THING TO GRILL UP SAUSAGES IN

1074
00:35:32,431 --> 00:35:33,130
THERE YOU ARE, IS THIS A COMMON
THING TO GRILL UP SAUSAGES IN
THE PRIME MINISTER'S BACKYARD?

1075
00:35:33,132 --> 00:35:36,766
THING TO GRILL UP SAUSAGES IN
THE PRIME MINISTER'S BACKYARD?
THE QUESTION IS, I GUESS, DO ALL

1076
00:35:36,768 --> 00:35:40,570
THE PRIME MINISTER'S BACKYARD?
THE QUESTION IS, I GUESS, DO ALL
FAMOUS PEOPLE IN NEW ZEALAND

1077
00:35:40,572 --> 00:35:42,005
THE QUESTION IS, I GUESS, DO ALL
FAMOUS PEOPLE IN NEW ZEALAND
KNOW EACH OTHER?

1078
00:35:42,007 --> 00:35:43,340
FAMOUS PEOPLE IN NEW ZEALAND
KNOW EACH OTHER?
>> I THINK MOST OF THEM DO.

1079
00:35:43,342 --> 00:35:45,509
KNOW EACH OTHER?
>> I THINK MOST OF THEM DO.
I AM KIND OF SHY, SO I ONLY KNOW

1080
00:35:45,511 --> 00:35:49,646
>> I THINK MOST OF THEM DO.
I AM KIND OF SHY, SO I ONLY KNOW
A HANDFUL, BUT I KNOW THE REALLY

1081
00:35:49,648 --> 00:35:52,182
I AM KIND OF SHY, SO I ONLY KNOW
A HANDFUL, BUT I KNOW THE REALLY
GOOD ONES.

1082
00:35:52,184 --> 00:35:53,984
A HANDFUL, BUT I KNOW THE REALLY
GOOD ONES.
>> Stephen: THIS IS A GOOD

1083
00:35:53,986 --> 00:35:54,151
GOOD ONES.
>> Stephen: THIS IS A GOOD
ONE.

1084
00:35:54,153 --> 00:35:55,819
>> Stephen: THIS IS A GOOD
ONE.
>> IT WASN'T TOTALLY OUT OF THE

1085
00:35:55,821 --> 00:35:56,186
ONE.
>> IT WASN'T TOTALLY OUT OF THE
ORDINARY FOR US.

1086
00:35:56,188 --> 00:35:58,388
>> IT WASN'T TOTALLY OUT OF THE
ORDINARY FOR US.
>> Stephen: DID YOU SPEND ALL

1087
00:35:58,390 --> 00:36:00,223
ORDINARY FOR US.
>> Stephen: DID YOU SPEND ALL
OF QUARANTINE IN NEW ZEALAND?

1088
00:36:00,225 --> 00:36:02,926
>> Stephen: DID YOU SPEND ALL
OF QUARANTINE IN NEW ZEALAND?
>> I WAS THERE FOR ALMOST ALL OF

1089
00:36:02,928 --> 00:36:03,093
OF QUARANTINE IN NEW ZEALAND?
>> I WAS THERE FOR ALMOST ALL OF
IT.

1090
00:36:03,095 --> 00:36:04,127
>> I WAS THERE FOR ALMOST ALL OF
IT.
I ACTUALLY WENT TO NEW YORK

1091
00:36:04,129 --> 00:36:06,830
IT.
I ACTUALLY WENT TO NEW YORK
BRIEFLY TO FINISH WORK ON THE

1092
00:36:06,832 --> 00:36:08,098
I ACTUALLY WENT TO NEW YORK
BRIEFLY TO FINISH WORK ON THE
ALBUM, WHICH WAS CRAZY, BUT, NO,

1093
00:36:08,100 --> 00:36:10,734
BRIEFLY TO FINISH WORK ON THE
ALBUM, WHICH WAS CRAZY, BUT, NO,
FOR THE MOST PART, NEW ZEALAND

1094
00:36:10,736 --> 00:36:12,836
ALBUM, WHICH WAS CRAZY, BUT, NO,
FOR THE MOST PART, NEW ZEALAND
FELT LIKE THE PLACE TO BE.

1095
00:36:12,838 --> 00:36:15,272
FOR THE MOST PART, NEW ZEALAND
FELT LIKE THE PLACE TO BE.
YEAH, I MEAN, IT WAS SUCH A

1096
00:36:15,274 --> 00:36:16,506
FELT LIKE THE PLACE TO BE.
YEAH, I MEAN, IT WAS SUCH A
CRAZY EXPERIENCE HAVING, LIKE,

1097
00:36:16,508 --> 00:36:18,575
YEAH, I MEAN, IT WAS SUCH A
CRAZY EXPERIENCE HAVING, LIKE,
COVID SO CONTAINED.

1098
00:36:18,577 --> 00:36:21,645
CRAZY EXPERIENCE HAVING, LIKE,
COVID SO CONTAINED.
>> Stephen: DO NEW ZEALAND --

1099
00:36:21,647 --> 00:36:24,681
COVID SO CONTAINED.
>> Stephen: DO NEW ZEALAND --
DO KIWIS FEEL SUPERIOR TO THE

1100
00:36:24,683 --> 00:36:26,383
>> Stephen: DO NEW ZEALAND --
DO KIWIS FEEL SUPERIOR TO THE
REST OF THE WORLD?

1101
00:36:26,385 --> 00:36:28,351
DO KIWIS FEEL SUPERIOR TO THE
REST OF THE WORLD?
YOU SHOULD, FOR THE WAY YOU

1102
00:36:28,353 --> 00:36:28,752
REST OF THE WORLD?
YOU SHOULD, FOR THE WAY YOU
HANDLED COVID?

1103
00:36:28,754 --> 00:36:31,421
YOU SHOULD, FOR THE WAY YOU
HANDLED COVID?
>> I MEAN, I DIDN'T HANDLE

1104
00:36:31,423 --> 00:36:31,821
HANDLED COVID?
>> I MEAN, I DIDN'T HANDLE
ANYTHING.

1105
00:36:31,823 --> 00:36:32,422
>> I MEAN, I DIDN'T HANDLE
ANYTHING.
MAKE NO MISTAKE.

1106
00:36:32,424 --> 00:36:33,323
ANYTHING.
MAKE NO MISTAKE.
>> Stephen: BUT Y'ALL

1107
00:36:33,325 --> 00:36:34,558
MAKE NO MISTAKE.
>> Stephen: BUT Y'ALL
COOPERATED WITH EACH OTHER.

1108
00:36:34,560 --> 00:36:36,526
>> Stephen: BUT Y'ALL
COOPERATED WITH EACH OTHER.
THAT SAYS SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR

1109
00:36:36,528 --> 00:36:39,095
COOPERATED WITH EACH OTHER.
THAT SAYS SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR
CIVIC INSTITUTIONS AND YOUR

1110
00:36:39,097 --> 00:36:40,664
THAT SAYS SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR
CIVIC INSTITUTIONS AND YOUR
BELIEF IN EACH OTHER.

1111
00:36:40,666 --> 00:36:42,732
CIVIC INSTITUTIONS AND YOUR
BELIEF IN EACH OTHER.
>> YEAH, I MEAN, WE'RE LUCKY TO

1112
00:36:42,734 --> 00:36:44,834
BELIEF IN EACH OTHER.
>> YEAH, I MEAN, WE'RE LUCKY TO
HAVE A REALLY CALM, STEADY

1113
00:36:44,836 --> 00:36:48,772
>> YEAH, I MEAN, WE'RE LUCKY TO
HAVE A REALLY CALM, STEADY
GOVERNMENT, YOU KNOW, AND WE

1114
00:36:48,774 --> 00:36:51,408
HAVE A REALLY CALM, STEADY
GOVERNMENT, YOU KNOW, AND WE
REALLY FELT --

1115
00:36:51,410 --> 00:36:52,042
GOVERNMENT, YOU KNOW, AND WE
REALLY FELT --
(INDISCERNIBLE) -- THROUGH THAT

1116
00:36:52,044 --> 00:36:52,742
REALLY FELT --
(INDISCERNIBLE) -- THROUGH THAT
TIME, YOU KNOW.

1117
00:36:52,744 --> 00:36:53,276
(INDISCERNIBLE) -- THROUGH THAT
TIME, YOU KNOW.
( LAUGHTER )

1118
00:36:53,278 --> 00:36:54,945
TIME, YOU KNOW.
( LAUGHTER )
BECAUSE YOU KIND OF FELT LIKE A

1119
00:36:54,947 --> 00:36:55,212
( LAUGHTER )
BECAUSE YOU KIND OF FELT LIKE A
KID.

1120
00:36:55,214 --> 00:36:57,113
BECAUSE YOU KIND OF FELT LIKE A
KID.
YOU NEEDED SOMEONE TO SAY, IT'S

1121
00:36:57,115 --> 00:36:58,715
KID.
YOU NEEDED SOMEONE TO SAY, IT'S
GOING TO BE OKAY, THIS IS WHAT

1122
00:36:58,717 --> 00:37:00,016
YOU NEEDED SOMEONE TO SAY, IT'S
GOING TO BE OKAY, THIS IS WHAT
WE'RE GOING TO DO, AND I REALLY

1123
00:37:00,018 --> 00:37:01,952
GOING TO BE OKAY, THIS IS WHAT
WE'RE GOING TO DO, AND I REALLY
FELT THAT AT HOME, WHICH IS

1124
00:37:01,954 --> 00:37:02,152
WE'RE GOING TO DO, AND I REALLY
FELT THAT AT HOME, WHICH IS
NICE.

1125
00:37:02,154 --> 00:37:03,486
FELT THAT AT HOME, WHICH IS
NICE.
>> Stephen: YOU PUT OUT YOUR

1126
00:37:03,488 --> 00:37:06,089
NICE.
>> Stephen: YOU PUT OUT YOUR
FIRST MUSIC IN FOUR YEARS.

1127
00:37:06,091 --> 00:37:09,659
>> Stephen: YOU PUT OUT YOUR
FIRST MUSIC IN FOUR YEARS.
YOU'VE JUST DROPPED A SINGLE

1128
00:37:09,661 --> 00:37:11,962
FIRST MUSIC IN FOUR YEARS.
YOU'VE JUST DROPPED A SINGLE
CALLED "SOLAR POWER."

1129
00:37:11,964 --> 00:37:12,262
YOU'VE JUST DROPPED A SINGLE
CALLED "SOLAR POWER."
( APPLAUSE )

1130
00:37:12,264 --> 00:37:14,998
CALLED "SOLAR POWER."
( APPLAUSE )
THAT'S ALSO THE NAME OF THE NEW

1131
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:16,399
( APPLAUSE )
THAT'S ALSO THE NAME OF THE NEW
L.P. THAT WILL BE COMING OUT

1132
00:37:16,401 --> 00:37:17,500
THAT'S ALSO THE NAME OF THE NEW
L.P. THAT WILL BE COMING OUT
LATER THIS SUMMER.

1133
00:37:17,502 --> 00:37:19,302
L.P. THAT WILL BE COMING OUT
LATER THIS SUMMER.
ER ORDINARILY, I WOULD HOLD UP A

1134
00:37:19,304 --> 00:37:20,837
LATER THIS SUMMER.
ER ORDINARILY, I WOULD HOLD UP A
PITBULLTURE OF THE ALBUM RIGHT

1135
00:37:20,839 --> 00:37:22,739
ER ORDINARILY, I WOULD HOLD UP A
PITBULLTURE OF THE ALBUM RIGHT
NOW, OR HOLD UP THE ALBUM

1136
00:37:22,741 --> 00:37:24,674
PITBULLTURE OF THE ALBUM RIGHT
NOW, OR HOLD UP THE ALBUM
BECAUSE THE ALBUM GENERALLY HAS

1137
00:37:24,676 --> 00:37:26,843
NOW, OR HOLD UP THE ALBUM
BECAUSE THE ALBUM GENERALLY HAS
A PICTURE ON IT, BUT CBS'S

1138
00:37:26,845 --> 00:37:28,845
BECAUSE THE ALBUM GENERALLY HAS
A PICTURE ON IT, BUT CBS'S
STANDARDS AND PRACTICES WILL NOT

1139
00:37:28,847 --> 00:37:31,314
A PICTURE ON IT, BUT CBS'S
STANDARDS AND PRACTICES WILL NOT
LET ME HOLD UP THE ALBUM

1140
00:37:31,316 --> 00:37:32,983
STANDARDS AND PRACTICES WILL NOT
LET ME HOLD UP THE ALBUM
BECAUSE, IRONICALLY, FOR AN

1141
00:37:32,985 --> 00:37:36,786
LET ME HOLD UP THE ALBUM
BECAUSE, IRONICALLY, FOR AN
ALBUM CALLED SOLAR POWER,

1142
00:37:36,788 --> 00:37:38,989
BECAUSE, IRONICALLY, FOR AN
ALBUM CALLED SOLAR POWER,
THERE'S A PHOTO ON IT OF --

1143
00:37:38,991 --> 00:37:42,425
ALBUM CALLED SOLAR POWER,
THERE'S A PHOTO ON IT OF --
WELL, WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE.

1144
00:37:42,427 --> 00:37:44,995
THERE'S A PHOTO ON IT OF --
WELL, WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE.
I THINK IT'S A BEAUTIFUL ALBUM

1145
00:37:44,997 --> 00:37:45,195
WELL, WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE.
I THINK IT'S A BEAUTIFUL ALBUM
COVER.

1146
00:37:45,197 --> 00:37:47,230
I THINK IT'S A BEAUTIFUL ALBUM
COVER.
AND WHAT WAS THE INSPIRATION FOR

1147
00:37:47,232 --> 00:37:49,299
COVER.
AND WHAT WAS THE INSPIRATION FOR
THAT?

1148
00:37:49,301 --> 00:37:51,167
AND WHAT WAS THE INSPIRATION FOR
THAT?
>> I CAN'T EVEN ACKNOWLEDGE THE

1149
00:37:51,169 --> 00:37:53,603
THAT?
>> I CAN'T EVEN ACKNOWLEDGE THE
COMMENT YOU JUST MADE, STEPHEN.

1150
00:37:53,605 --> 00:37:53,937
>> I CAN'T EVEN ACKNOWLEDGE THE
COMMENT YOU JUST MADE, STEPHEN.
( LAUGHTER )

1151
00:37:53,939 --> 00:37:55,839
COMMENT YOU JUST MADE, STEPHEN.
( LAUGHTER )
MY FRIEND JUST TOOK IT.

1152
00:37:55,841 --> 00:37:57,607
( LAUGHTER )
MY FRIEND JUST TOOK IT.
IT WAS JUST ME JUMPING OVER A

1153
00:37:57,609 --> 00:37:59,075
MY FRIEND JUST TOOK IT.
IT WAS JUST ME JUMPING OVER A
FRIEND ON A BEACH.

1154
00:37:59,077 --> 00:38:04,114
IT WAS JUST ME JUMPING OVER A
FRIEND ON A BEACH.
FOR THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW, IT IS

1155
00:38:04,116 --> 00:38:06,916
FRIEND ON A BEACH.
FOR THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW, IT IS
MY BUTT KIND OF FROMBY BELOW AND

1156
00:38:06,918 --> 00:38:09,653
FOR THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW, IT IS
MY BUTT KIND OF FROMBY BELOW AND
I'M IN A BIKINI, SO IT'S A

1157
00:38:09,655 --> 00:38:12,188
MY BUTT KIND OF FROMBY BELOW AND
I'M IN A BIKINI, SO IT'S A
LITTLE HARD CORE, BUT IT WAS SO

1158
00:38:12,190 --> 00:38:14,858
I'M IN A BIKINI, SO IT'S A
LITTLE HARD CORE, BUT IT WAS SO
JOYFUL TO ME, IT FELT INNOCENT

1159
00:38:14,860 --> 00:38:19,129
LITTLE HARD CORE, BUT IT WAS SO
JOYFUL TO ME, IT FELT INNOCENT
AND PLAYFUL AND A LITTLE BIT

1160
00:38:19,131 --> 00:38:19,996
JOYFUL TO ME, IT FELT INNOCENT
AND PLAYFUL AND A LITTLE BIT
LIKE FERRELL AND --

1161
00:38:19,998 --> 00:38:21,965
AND PLAYFUL AND A LITTLE BIT
LIKE FERRELL AND --
>> Stephen: I THINK IT MATCHES

1162
00:38:21,967 --> 00:38:23,500
LIKE FERRELL AND --
>> Stephen: I THINK IT MATCHES
THE MOMENT BECAUSE IT'S SO FREE

1163
00:38:23,502 --> 00:38:25,602
>> Stephen: I THINK IT MATCHES
THE MOMENT BECAUSE IT'S SO FREE
AND HAPPY AND IF I HAD A BUTT

1164
00:38:25,604 --> 00:38:28,405
THE MOMENT BECAUSE IT'S SO FREE
AND HAPPY AND IF I HAD A BUTT
LIKE THAT, I WOULD BE JUMPING

1165
00:38:28,407 --> 00:38:29,606
AND HAPPY AND IF I HAD A BUTT
LIKE THAT, I WOULD BE JUMPING
OVER SOMEBODY, TOO.

1166
00:38:29,608 --> 00:38:30,874
LIKE THAT, I WOULD BE JUMPING
OVER SOMEBODY, TOO.
>> YOU'VE GOT TO DO IT WHILE

1167
00:38:30,876 --> 00:38:33,043
OVER SOMEBODY, TOO.
>> YOU'VE GOT TO DO IT WHILE
YOU'VE GOT IT, YOU KNOW.

1168
00:38:33,045 --> 00:38:33,343
>> YOU'VE GOT TO DO IT WHILE
YOU'VE GOT IT, YOU KNOW.
( LAUGHTER )

1169
00:38:33,345 --> 00:38:33,943
YOU'VE GOT IT, YOU KNOW.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: TODAY YOU

1170
00:38:33,945 --> 00:38:35,945
( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: TODAY YOU
ANNOUNCED THE RELEASE OF THE

1171
00:38:35,947 --> 00:38:37,647
>> Stephen: TODAY YOU
ANNOUNCED THE RELEASE OF THE
ALBUM, AUGUST 20th, AND YOU'RE

1172
00:38:37,649 --> 00:38:39,549
ANNOUNCED THE RELEASE OF THE
ALBUM, AUGUST 20th, AND YOU'RE
GOING ON A WORLD TOUR.

1173
00:38:39,551 --> 00:38:40,517
ALBUM, AUGUST 20th, AND YOU'RE
GOING ON A WORLD TOUR.
ARE YOU EXCITED TO BE BACK IN

1174
00:38:40,519 --> 00:38:41,985
GOING ON A WORLD TOUR.
ARE YOU EXCITED TO BE BACK IN
FRONT OF AUDIENCES?

1175
00:38:41,987 --> 00:38:45,655
ARE YOU EXCITED TO BE BACK IN
FRONT OF AUDIENCES?
BECAUSE I FIND IT QUITE

1176
00:38:45,657 --> 00:38:47,257
FRONT OF AUDIENCES?
BECAUSE I FIND IT QUITE
DELIGHTFUL.

1177
00:38:47,259 --> 00:38:48,058
BECAUSE I FIND IT QUITE
DELIGHTFUL.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

1178
00:38:48,060 --> 00:38:52,095
DELIGHTFUL.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> I AM SO EXCITED.

1179
00:38:52,097 --> 00:38:55,732
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> I AM SO EXCITED.
OH, MY GOD I CAN HEAR THEM.

1180
00:38:55,734 --> 00:38:56,032
>> I AM SO EXCITED.
OH, MY GOD I CAN HEAR THEM.
( LAUGHTER )

1181
00:38:56,034 --> 00:39:00,103
OH, MY GOD I CAN HEAR THEM.
( LAUGHTER )
I'M REALLY EXCITED, YEAH.

1182
00:39:00,105 --> 00:39:02,372
( LAUGHTER )
I'M REALLY EXCITED, YEAH.
IT SORT OF ISN'T REAL BUT I'M

1183
00:39:02,374 --> 00:39:02,839
I'M REALLY EXCITED, YEAH.
IT SORT OF ISN'T REAL BUT I'M
SUPER KEEN.

1184
00:39:02,841 --> 00:39:06,343
IT SORT OF ISN'T REAL BUT I'M
SUPER KEEN.
I THINK THIS ALBUM WILL BE SO --

1185
00:39:06,345 --> 00:39:08,211
SUPER KEEN.
I THINK THIS ALBUM WILL BE SO --
JUST JOYFUL AND BIG AND SUCH A

1186
00:39:08,213 --> 00:39:12,248
I THINK THIS ALBUM WILL BE SO --
JUST JOYFUL AND BIG AND SUCH A
GOOD THING TO EXPERIENCE WITH A

1187
00:39:12,250 --> 00:39:12,916
JUST JOYFUL AND BIG AND SUCH A
GOOD THING TO EXPERIENCE WITH A
BUNCH OF PEOPLE.

1188
00:39:12,918 --> 00:39:14,651
GOOD THING TO EXPERIENCE WITH A
BUNCH OF PEOPLE.
SO I'M GLAD THE TIMING WORKED

1189
00:39:14,653 --> 00:39:16,753
BUNCH OF PEOPLE.
SO I'M GLAD THE TIMING WORKED
OUT THAT I CAN DO A TOUR.

1190
00:39:16,755 --> 00:39:17,220
SO I'M GLAD THE TIMING WORKED
OUT THAT I CAN DO A TOUR.
SEEMS CRAZY.

1191
00:39:17,222 --> 00:39:18,588
OUT THAT I CAN DO A TOUR.
SEEMS CRAZY.
>> Stephen: I HAVE TO ASK YOU

1192
00:39:18,590 --> 00:39:20,156
SEEMS CRAZY.
>> Stephen: I HAVE TO ASK YOU
BEFORE WE GO, WHERE IN THE WORLD

1193
00:39:20,158 --> 00:39:21,124
>> Stephen: I HAVE TO ASK YOU
BEFORE WE GO, WHERE IN THE WORLD
ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?

1194
00:39:21,126 --> 00:39:24,294
BEFORE WE GO, WHERE IN THE WORLD
ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?
ARE YOU DOWN IN NEW ZEALAND?

1195
00:39:24,296 --> 00:39:27,464
ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?
ARE YOU DOWN IN NEW ZEALAND?
>> I AM ACTUALLY IN L.A., BUT,

1196
00:39:27,466 --> 00:39:29,666
ARE YOU DOWN IN NEW ZEALAND?
>> I AM ACTUALLY IN L.A., BUT,
STEPHEN, I'M COMING TO YOU, AND

1197
00:39:29,668 --> 00:39:31,568
>> I AM ACTUALLY IN L.A., BUT,
STEPHEN, I'M COMING TO YOU, AND
I'M BRINGING A LOT OF MY

1198
00:39:31,570 --> 00:39:34,037
STEPHEN, I'M COMING TO YOU, AND
I'M BRINGING A LOT OF MY
FRIENDS, AND WE'RE GOING TO SHOW

1199
00:39:34,039 --> 00:39:38,842
I'M BRINGING A LOT OF MY
FRIENDS, AND WE'RE GOING TO SHOW
YOU A LITTLE BIT ABOUT WHAT

1200
00:39:38,844 --> 00:39:40,443
FRIENDS, AND WE'RE GOING TO SHOW
YOU A LITTLE BIT ABOUT WHAT
"SOLAR POWER" IS ABOUT, SO WE'LL

1201
00:39:40,445 --> 00:39:40,877
YOU A LITTLE BIT ABOUT WHAT
"SOLAR POWER" IS ABOUT, SO WE'LL
SEE YOU THEN.

1202
00:39:40,879 --> 00:39:43,513
"SOLAR POWER" IS ABOUT, SO WE'LL
SEE YOU THEN.
>> Stephen: JUST TO BE CLEAR,

1203
00:39:43,515 --> 00:39:45,315
SEE YOU THEN.
>> Stephen: JUST TO BE CLEAR,
ARE YOU GOING TO COME TO THIS

1204
00:39:45,317 --> 00:39:46,483
>> Stephen: JUST TO BE CLEAR,
ARE YOU GOING TO COME TO THIS
THEATER IS THIS.

1205
00:39:46,485 --> 00:39:49,519
ARE YOU GOING TO COME TO THIS
THEATER IS THIS.
>> I'M COMING TO THAT THEATER --

1206
00:39:49,521 --> 00:39:50,019
THEATER IS THIS.
>> I'M COMING TO THAT THEATER --
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

1207
00:39:50,021 --> 00:39:52,756
>> I'M COMING TO THAT THEATER --
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A GOOD

1208
00:39:52,758 --> 00:39:53,089
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A GOOD
TIME.

1209
00:39:53,091 --> 00:39:53,590
AND WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A GOOD
TIME.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

1210
00:39:53,592 --> 00:39:56,359
TIME.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: CHEERS TO THAT!

1211
00:39:56,361 --> 00:39:58,561
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: CHEERS TO THAT!
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU AGAIN IN

1212
00:39:58,563 --> 00:40:00,230
>> Stephen: CHEERS TO THAT!
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU AGAIN IN
PERSON, AND I PROMISE NO PRANKS

1213
00:40:00,232 --> 00:40:00,697
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU AGAIN IN
PERSON, AND I PROMISE NO PRANKS
THIS TIME.

1214
00:40:00,699 --> 00:40:03,400
PERSON, AND I PROMISE NO PRANKS
THIS TIME.
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH.

1215
00:40:03,402 --> 00:40:04,367
THIS TIME.
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH.
>> Stephen:

1216
00:40:04,369 --> 00:40:04,901
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH.
>> Stephen:
>> STEPHEN: HER NEW SINGLE

1217
00:40:04,903 --> 00:40:05,435
>> Stephen:
>> STEPHEN: HER NEW SINGLE
"SOLAR POWER" IS AVAILABLE

1218
00:40:05,437 --> 00:40:05,602
>> STEPHEN: HER NEW SINGLE
"SOLAR POWER" IS AVAILABLE
NOW.

1219
00:40:05,604 --> 00:40:08,037
"SOLAR POWER" IS AVAILABLE
NOW.
LORDE, EVERYBODY!

1220
00:40:08,039 --> 00:40:09,639
NOW.
LORDE, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK

1221
00:40:09,641 --> 00:40:10,707
LORDE, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

1222
00:40:10,709 --> 00:40:12,642
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪

1223
00:40:18,315 --> 00:40:21,384
>> STEPHEN: THAT'S IT FOR THE
LATE SHOW.
TUNE IN TOMORROW WHEN MY GUESTS

1224
00:40:21,386 --> 00:40:21,985
LATE SHOW.
TUNE IN TOMORROW WHEN MY GUESTS
WILL BE WANDA SYKES AND CRAIG

1225
00:40:21,987 --> 00:40:25,221
TUNE IN TOMORROW WHEN MY GUESTS
WILL BE WANDA SYKES AND CRAIG
MELVIN.

1226
00:40:25,223 --> 00:40:25,889
WILL BE WANDA SYKES AND CRAIG
MELVIN.
JAMES CORDEN IS NEXT, GOODNIGHT.

1227
00:40:25,891 --> 00:40:26,389
MELVIN.
JAMES CORDEN IS NEXT, GOODNIGHT.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

1228
00:40:26,391 --> 00:40:26,556
JAMES CORDEN IS NEXT, GOODNIGHT.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪

1229
00:40:27,191 --> 00:40:30,293
<font color="#ffff00"> Captioning sponsored by CBS</font>
Captioned by
<font color="#00ffff"> Media Access Group at WGBH</font>

1230
00:40:30,295 --> 00:40:30,794
Captioned by
<font color="#00ffff"> Media Access Group at WGBH</font>
access.wgbh.org