1 00:00:01,534 --> 00:00:04,237 >> SENATOR LINDSEY GRAHAM HAS PROMISED TO GO TO WAR OVER 2 00:00:04,304 --> 00:00:06,773 CHICK-FIL-A AFTER SOME NOTRE DAME STUDENTS ASKED THE 3 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:10,810 UNIVERSITY NOT TO ADD CHICK-FIL-A TO THEIR CAMPUS OVER 4 00:00:10,877 --> 00:00:13,279 ITS ANTI-LGBTQ STANCE. 5 00:00:13,346 --> 00:00:14,581 THE SENATOR TWEETED... 6 00:00:32,599 --> 00:00:34,801 ♪♪ >> WE WILL NOT CHEW SALADS INTO 7 00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:36,102 THE NIGHT! 8 00:00:36,169 --> 00:00:38,538 WE WILL NOT TASTE FRUIT WHEN WE BITE! 9 00:00:38,605 --> 00:00:45,879 WE ARE GOING TO EAT WHOPPERS WITH A SIDE OF CHICKEN FRIES! 10 00:00:45,945 --> 00:00:48,715 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> THEY MAY TAKE OUR LIVES, BUT 11 00:00:48,782 --> 00:00:53,720 THEY'LL NEVER TAKE OUR FILET OF FISH! 12 00:00:53,787 --> 00:00:56,389 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> THIS IS SUBWAY! 13 00:00:56,456 --> 00:00:58,691 ♪♪ >> ANNOUNCER: IT'S "THE LATE 14 00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:03,096 SHOW WITH STEPHEN COLBERT!" TONIGHT: 15 00:01:03,163 --> 00:01:06,166 TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT! 16 00:01:06,232 --> 00:01:11,638 PLUS, STEPHEN WELCOMES: HUGH JACKMAN. 17 00:01:11,704 --> 00:01:16,443 AND MUSICAL GUEST LORDE. 18 00:01:16,509 --> 00:01:19,813 FEATURING JON BATISTE AND "STAY HUMAN." 19 00:01:19,879 --> 00:01:22,649 AND NOW, LIVE ON TAPE FROM THE ED SULLIVAN THEATER IN NEW YORK 20 00:01:22,715 --> 00:01:26,386 CITY, IT'S STEPHEN COLBERT! 21 00:01:26,453 --> 00:01:36,429 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: HELLO, EVERYBODY! 22 00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:43,837 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: HELLO, EVERYBODY! 23 00:01:43,903 --> 00:01:46,473 >> Stephen: OH, YOU'RE TRYING TO SNEAK UP ON ME! 24 00:01:46,539 --> 00:01:48,341 GOOD TO SEE YA! 25 00:01:48,408 --> 00:01:51,611 GOOD TO SEE YA! 26 00:01:51,678 --> 00:01:53,713 HELLO. 27 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:54,647 HELLO. 28 00:01:54,714 --> 00:01:56,316 HELLO. 29 00:01:56,382 --> 00:01:57,050 ( PIANO RIFF ) THANK YOU! 30 00:01:57,116 --> 00:02:00,353 THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. 31 00:02:00,420 --> 00:02:02,388 WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW." 32 00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:03,089 I'M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT. 33 00:02:03,156 --> 00:02:08,394 AND -- ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) 34 00:02:08,461 --> 00:02:13,266 TONIGHT, I GOTTA START OFF TALKING ABOUT A SUBJECT I 35 00:02:13,333 --> 00:02:18,671 USUALLY DON'T BRING UP IN POLITE COMPANY: 36 00:02:18,738 --> 00:02:19,606 FORMER PRESIDENT LOLLACOLLUDA. 37 00:02:19,672 --> 00:02:22,909 ( LAUGHTER ) NATURALLY, WE ALL WANT TO FORGET 38 00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:24,043 ABOUT THAT GUY. 39 00:02:24,110 --> 00:02:28,414 SINCE THE DAY HE WENT OUT AND LIED ABOUT THE ELECTION ON 40 00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:32,685 NOVEMBER 5th, OKAY, SINCE THAT DAY, I TRY NOT TO SAY HIS NAME. 41 00:02:32,752 --> 00:02:35,355 WE DON'T SHOW HIS NAME ON AIR. 42 00:02:35,421 --> 00:02:42,662 I DON'T DO MY IMPRESSION BECAUSE HAVEN'T YOU SUFFERED ENOUGH? 43 00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:46,666 ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE ) 44 00:02:46,733 --> 00:02:52,105 ( CHEERING ) BUT THERE ARE JUST ARE TIMES 45 00:02:52,171 --> 00:03:00,880 WHEN YOU HAVE TO SLAP YOURSELF IN THE FACE, PUT A LITTLE COLD 46 00:03:00,947 --> 00:03:02,415 WATER ON THE BACK OF YOUR NECK, BEAR 47 00:03:02,482 --> 00:03:04,551 DOWN ON THE BITE STICK, AND REMIND YOURSELF JUST HOW BAD IT 48 00:03:04,617 --> 00:03:06,653 WAS BY REPEATING OUT LOUD THE SIMPLE FACT: "DONALD TRUMP IS A 49 00:03:06,719 --> 00:03:10,690 FASCIST." 50 00:03:10,757 --> 00:03:18,665 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) AND THAT'S NOT JUST ME FLAPPING 51 00:03:18,731 --> 00:03:22,669 MY GUMS, THAT'S CHAIRMAN OF THE JOINT CHIEFS MARK MILLEY, SEEN 52 00:03:22,735 --> 00:03:26,406 HERE AT DEFCON EYEBROW. 53 00:03:26,472 --> 00:03:30,543 ( LAUGHTER ) IN A NEW BOOK, MILLEY REVEALS 54 00:03:30,610 --> 00:03:31,811 THAT, FOLLOWING THE ELECTION, HE THOUGHT THE EX-PRESIDENT "WAS 55 00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:35,815 STOKING UNREST, POSSIBLY IN HOPES OF AN EXCUSE TO INVOKE THE 56 00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:41,654 INSURRECTION ACT AND CALL OUT THE MILITARY." 57 00:03:41,721 --> 00:03:43,289 SAYING, "THIS IS A REICHSTAG MOMENT." 58 00:03:43,356 --> 00:03:44,457 NO SURPRISE. 59 00:03:44,524 --> 00:03:48,861 THE LAST PRESIDENT WAS PRETTY POPULAR WITH THE ALT-REICH. 60 00:03:48,928 --> 00:03:51,030 ( LAUGHTER ) OF COURSE, THE REICHSTAG FIRE 61 00:03:51,097 --> 00:03:53,533 WAS IN 1930S GERMANY, WHEN AN ATTACK ON THE COUNTRY'S 62 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:55,802 LEGISLATIVE BRANCH WAS USED AS A PRETEXT TO SOLIDIFY FASCIST 63 00:03:55,868 --> 00:03:58,071 CONTROL. 64 00:03:58,137 --> 00:04:01,808 WHAT THE MAGA CROWD DID THIS YEAR WAS TOTALLY DIFFERENT. 65 00:04:01,874 --> 00:04:04,877 IT WAS IN ENGLISH. 66 00:04:04,944 --> 00:04:07,280 ( LAUGHTER ) MILLEY SAYS THAT HE WAS ALERTED 67 00:04:07,347 --> 00:04:10,083 THAT THE FORMER PRESIDENT AND HIS ALLIES WERE TRYING TO 68 00:04:10,149 --> 00:04:13,786 "OVERTURN THE GOVERNMENT" BY A CALL FROM "AN OLD FRIEND." 69 00:04:13,853 --> 00:04:18,057 THE FRIEND ALSO SENT A TEXT: "THE ORANGE EGGPLANT IS A KNOT-Z 70 00:04:18,124 --> 00:04:19,792 CLOWN. 71 00:04:19,859 --> 00:04:22,061 WE ARE IN DEEP DOO DOO." 72 00:04:22,128 --> 00:04:28,835 ( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) 73 00:04:28,901 --> 00:04:32,972 >> Jon: THEY'RE USING EMOJIS. 74 00:04:33,039 --> 00:04:33,439 EMOJIS. 75 00:04:33,506 --> 00:04:34,607 >> Stephen: YEAH. 76 00:04:34,674 --> 00:04:36,042 NOW, THE GENERAL WAS CONFIDENT THE COUP ATTEMPT WOULD FAIL, 77 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:37,377 TELLING AIDES, "THEY MAY TRY, BUT THEY'RE NOT GOING TO (BLEEP) 78 00:04:37,443 --> 00:04:38,244 SUCCEED. 79 00:04:38,311 --> 00:04:40,480 YOU CAN'T DO THIS WITHOUT THE MILITARY. 80 00:04:40,546 --> 00:04:42,115 YOU CAN'T DO THIS WITHOUT THE C.I.A. AND THE F.B.I. 81 00:04:42,181 --> 00:04:45,818 WE'RE THE GUYS WITH GUNS." 82 00:04:45,885 --> 00:04:49,822 GENERAL, THAT'S NOT AS REASSURING AS YOU THINK. 83 00:04:49,889 --> 00:04:52,859 ( LAUGHTER ) MAY I REMIND YOU, 84 00:04:52,925 --> 00:04:54,060 THIS IS AMERICA. 85 00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:55,161 WE'RE ALL THE GUYS WITH GUNS. 86 00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:59,365 I DON'T OWN ANY GUNS, AND I THINK I DO. 87 00:04:59,432 --> 00:05:01,834 ( LAUGHTER ) BUT IT IS REFRESHING THAT OUR 88 00:05:01,901 --> 00:05:06,005 COUNTRY WAS SAVED BECAUSE, FOR ONCE, THE C.I.A. DIDN'T WANT TO 89 00:05:06,072 --> 00:05:07,340 DESTABILIZE A DEMOCRACY. 90 00:05:07,407 --> 00:05:10,076 MILLEY DIDN'T RELAX AFTER THE JANUARY 6 INSURRECTION WAS 91 00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:11,577 THWARTED. 92 00:05:11,644 --> 00:05:13,813 IN THE RUN-UP TO BIDEN'S INAUGURATION, HE WANTED THE 93 00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:18,584 MILITARY TO LOCK DOWN D.C., TELLING HIS TROOPS, "HERE'S THE 94 00:05:18,651 --> 00:05:21,988 DEAL, GUYS: THESE GUYS ARE NAZIS, THEY'RE BOOGALOO BOYS, 95 00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:23,322 THEY'RE PROUD BOYS. 96 00:05:23,389 --> 00:05:25,825 THESE ARE THE SAME PEOPLE WE FOUGHT IN WORLD WAR II." 97 00:05:25,892 --> 00:05:27,794 OH, COME ON. 98 00:05:27,860 --> 00:05:31,831 THEY'RE INSURRECTIONISTS, BUT WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THESE GUYS 99 00:05:31,898 --> 00:05:37,804 ARE NAZIS? 100 00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:42,475 ( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) 101 00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:44,777 CLEARLY -- THOSE ARE ACTUAL PHOTOS. 102 00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:46,946 >> Jon: THAT'S A REAL PHOTO! 103 00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:53,386 >> Stephen: CLEARLY, THE FORMER PRESIDENT 104 00:05:53,453 --> 00:05:55,121 DIDN'T LIKE THE TEA THAT MILLEY SPILL-Y, BECAUSE EARLIER TODAY, 105 00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:57,724 HE RELEASED A STATEMENT DECLARING, "I'M NOT INTO COUPS!" 106 00:05:57,790 --> 00:06:00,827 ADDING, "IF I WAS GOING TO DO A COUP, ONE OF THE LAST PEOPLE I 107 00:06:00,893 --> 00:06:13,172 WOULD WANT TO DO IT WITH IS GENERAL MARK MILLEY." 108 00:06:13,239 --> 00:06:15,441 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) OKAY, YOU'VE CLEARLY PUT SOME 109 00:06:15,508 --> 00:06:17,777 THOUGHT INTO THIS THING YOU'RE NOT INTO. 110 00:06:17,844 --> 00:06:19,812 (AS HUSBAND) "HONEY, COME ON, I AM NOT INTO 111 00:06:19,879 --> 00:06:22,048 THREE-WAYS. 112 00:06:22,115 --> 00:06:26,319 BUT IF I WAS, I WOULDN'T DO IT WITH OUR NEIGHBOR ALICE! 113 00:06:26,385 --> 00:06:29,689 YOUR SISTER IS WAY HOTTER. 114 00:06:29,756 --> 00:06:31,124 ( LAUGHTER ) YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE FUNNY, IF 115 00:06:31,190 --> 00:06:32,592 WE JUST -- OKAY. 116 00:06:32,658 --> 00:06:34,193 ( LAUGHTER ) THE F.B.I.'S STILL TRACKING DOWN 117 00:06:34,260 --> 00:06:35,528 ALL THE BROWNSHIRTS WHO LEFT BROWN STREAKS ON THE CAPITOL ON 118 00:06:35,595 --> 00:06:40,299 JANUARY 6. 119 00:06:40,366 --> 00:06:41,601 I'LL TELL YOU ALL ABOUT IT IN TONIGHT'S "SEDITIONIST ROUND-UP 120 00:06:41,667 --> 00:06:44,170 ROUNDUP." 121 00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:45,605 ♪♪ >> I CAN'T FOUR-STOMACH THESE 122 00:06:45,671 --> 00:06:49,375 IDIOTS! 123 00:06:49,442 --> 00:06:54,714 >> Stephen: COWS HAVE FOUR STOMACHS. 124 00:06:54,781 --> 00:06:55,748 ( LAUGHTER ) FIRST UP, WE ALL REMEMBER THIS 125 00:06:55,815 --> 00:06:57,350 GUY, PHOTOGRAPHED HANGING FROM THE SENATE BALCONY. 126 00:06:57,416 --> 00:07:01,387 HE'S LIKE SPIDERMAN IF HE GOT BITTEN BY A RADIOACTIVE IDIOT. 127 00:07:01,454 --> 00:07:05,224 ( LAUGHTER ) TURNS OUT, HE'S IOWA RESIDENT 128 00:07:05,291 --> 00:07:09,629 JOSIAH COLT, SEEN HERE PREPARING TO AUDITION FOR THE MUSKETEERS. 129 00:07:09,695 --> 00:07:13,032 ( LAUGHTER ) COLT APPEARED IN COURT 130 00:07:13,099 --> 00:07:16,602 YESTERDAY, WHERE PROSECUTORS EXPLAINED HOW HE AND HIS BUDDIES 131 00:07:16,669 --> 00:07:19,405 CAME TO D.C. STRAPPED TO THE TEETH, WITH A GLOCK .43 PISTOL, 132 00:07:19,472 --> 00:07:25,378 TWO MAGAZINES OF AMMUNITION, A HANDHELD TASER STUN GUN, KNIVES, 133 00:07:25,444 --> 00:07:29,582 GAS MASK, BODY ARMOR, AN EXPANDABLE BATON, WALKIE-TALKIES 134 00:07:29,649 --> 00:07:31,384 AND BEAR MACE. 135 00:07:31,450 --> 00:07:33,953 THEY BROUGHT BEAR MACE TO A "STOP THE STEAL" RALLY? 136 00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:40,193 WHAT DID THEY THINK WAS BEING STOLEN, A PIC-A-NIC BASKET? 137 00:07:40,259 --> 00:07:42,862 ( LAUGHTER ) HEY, BOO-BOO! 138 00:07:42,929 --> 00:07:45,631 HEY, LITTLE BUDDY! 139 00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:48,801 HEY, BOO! 140 00:07:48,868 --> 00:07:53,606 HEY, YOGI, HEY, YOG, LET'S STORM THE CAPITOL! 141 00:07:53,673 --> 00:07:55,608 ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE ) 142 00:07:55,675 --> 00:07:57,610 LIKE A LOT OF THESE DINGUSES, COLT SEEMED CONFUSED ABOUT WHERE 143 00:07:57,677 --> 00:08:00,246 HE WAS. 144 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:01,647 EVEN THOUGH HE WAS SPELUNKING IN THE SENATE, HE APPARENTLY 145 00:08:01,714 --> 00:08:04,150 BELIEVED HE WAS IN THE HOUSE. 146 00:08:04,217 --> 00:08:08,187 THE JUDGE ASKED HIM "YOU SAT IN THE PRESIDING OFFICER'S CHAIR, 147 00:08:08,254 --> 00:08:10,823 WHICH YOU MISTAKENLY THOUGHT WAS SPEAKER NANCY PELOSI'S CHAIR. 148 00:08:10,890 --> 00:08:17,096 IS THAT AN ACCURATE SUMMARY?" AND COLT SAID, YES. 149 00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:18,798 ( LAUGHTER ) SO HE HAD NO IDEA WHERE HE WAS. 150 00:08:18,865 --> 00:08:20,766 FOR HIS NEXT HEIST, HE'S GOING TO BREAK INTO THE VAULT AT 151 00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:23,836 JOSEPH A. BANK. 152 00:08:23,903 --> 00:08:26,472 ( LAUGHTER ) STEAL ONE SUIT, GET A SECOND 153 00:08:26,539 --> 00:08:27,073 SUIT FREE. 154 00:08:27,139 --> 00:08:32,411 ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE ) 155 00:08:32,478 --> 00:08:33,279 THAT'S A DEAL. 156 00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:42,054 THEY MAKE QUALITY, QUALITY ME MENSWEAR. 157 00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:44,557 A COUPLE OF DAYS BEFORE THE INSURRECTION, ONE OF COLT'S DUMB 158 00:08:44,624 --> 00:08:50,596 FRIENDS POSTED THIS PHOTO OF COLT IN BED WITH A GUN, TO WHICH 159 00:08:50,663 --> 00:08:52,531 COLT COMMENTED, "READY FOR ANY BATTLE" WITH THE CRYING LAUGHING 160 00:08:52,598 --> 00:08:53,666 EMOJI. 161 00:08:53,733 --> 00:08:54,767 WHEN THE JUDGE ASKED HIM ABOUT IT, COLT SAID "THE PICTURE 162 00:08:54,834 --> 00:08:58,804 POSTED WAS ACTUALLY A JOKE. 163 00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,473 IT WAS KIND OF LIKE A FUNNY JOKE." 164 00:09:00,539 --> 00:09:01,841 AS A PROFESSIONAL IN THE BIZ WE CALL "SHOW," YOU KNOW WHAT WE 165 00:09:01,908 --> 00:09:02,875 CALL SOMETHING THAT'S "KIND OF LIKE A FUNNY JOKE"? 166 00:09:02,942 --> 00:09:06,579 NOT A FUNNY JOKE. 167 00:09:06,646 --> 00:09:07,813 ( LAUGHTER ) HERE'S A BETTER JOKE FOR MR. 168 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:08,547 COLT: "KNOCK, KNOCK." 169 00:09:08,614 --> 00:09:09,849 >> AUDIENCE: WHO'S THERE? 170 00:09:09,916 --> 00:09:14,120 >> STEPHEN: "IT'S THE F.B.I., YOU'RE GOING TO JAIL." 171 00:09:14,186 --> 00:09:15,054 ( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) 172 00:09:15,121 --> 00:09:18,791 >> Jon: OH! 173 00:09:18,858 --> 00:09:21,761 OH! 174 00:09:21,827 --> 00:09:25,197 ( APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: NOT EVERY 175 00:09:25,264 --> 00:09:29,201 INSURRECTIONIST ON JANUARY 6th WAS A LONE WOLF. 176 00:09:29,268 --> 00:09:30,469 FOR SOME, IT'S IN THE GENE POOL. 177 00:09:30,536 --> 00:09:31,737 LIKE THE FIVE MEMBERS OF A TEXAS FAMILY WHO WERE ARRESTED FOR THE 178 00:09:31,804 --> 00:09:32,939 CAPITOL ATTACK. 179 00:09:33,005 --> 00:09:34,774 EVIDENTLY, JANUARY 6TH WAS "TAKE YOUR KID TO HANG MIKE PENCE 180 00:09:34,840 --> 00:09:38,544 DAY." 181 00:09:38,611 --> 00:09:41,647 ( LAUGHTER ) THE FAMILY WAS CAUGHT ON CAPITOL 182 00:09:41,714 --> 00:09:42,782 SURVEILLANCE CAMERAS. 183 00:09:42,848 --> 00:09:44,550 THERE'S THE DAD, TOM MUNN. 184 00:09:44,617 --> 00:09:46,185 HIS WIFE DAWN. 185 00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:50,556 AND THREE OF HIS ADULT CHILDREN: JOSH, KRISTI, AND KAYLI. 186 00:09:50,623 --> 00:09:52,725 TOUGH TO GET CAUGHT LIKE THAT, BUT AT LEAST THEY HAVE THIS 187 00:09:52,792 --> 00:09:54,794 YEAR'S CHRISTMAS CARD. 188 00:09:54,860 --> 00:10:01,100 "TREASON'S GREETINGS!" ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) 189 00:10:01,167 --> 00:10:02,401 NOT BAD. 190 00:10:02,468 --> 00:10:02,802 THAT'S NOT BAD. 191 00:10:02,868 --> 00:10:04,470 NOT BAD. 192 00:10:04,537 --> 00:10:06,505 THAT'S NOT BAD. 193 00:10:06,572 --> 00:10:08,541 EARLIER THIS WEEK, I HAD THE CHANCE TO SIT DOWN WITH THE 194 00:10:08,607 --> 00:10:10,810 WORLD'S NEWEST ASTRONAUT, BILLIONAIRE AND CRUISE MAGICIAN 195 00:10:10,876 --> 00:10:16,282 HITTING ON YOUR WIFE, SIR RICHARD BRANSON. 196 00:10:16,349 --> 00:10:18,784 THIS WEEKEND, WE ALL WATCHED BRANSON FLY TO THE EDGE OF SPACE 197 00:10:18,851 --> 00:10:22,355 ON HIS VIRGIN GALACTIC ROCKET SHIP, BUT NOW THERE'S A 198 00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:25,491 CONTROVERSY THREATENING TO TEAR THE WHOLE THING APART. 199 00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:27,994 ON THE MORNING OF THE LAUNCH, LIVESTREAM VIEWERS SAW THIS 200 00:10:28,060 --> 00:10:30,563 VIDEO OF BRANSON RIDING HIS BIKE THROUGH THE NEW MEXICO DESERT UP 201 00:10:30,629 --> 00:10:35,568 TO THE SPACE PORT TO GREET HIS FELLOW CREW MEMBERS. 202 00:10:35,634 --> 00:10:36,635 SO CUTE, SO WHOLESOME. 203 00:10:36,702 --> 00:10:41,207 BILLIONAIRES: THEY'RE JUST LIKE MULTI-MILLIONAIRES. 204 00:10:41,273 --> 00:10:42,541 ( LAUGHTER ) BUT, NOT SO FAST! 205 00:10:42,608 --> 00:10:48,547 BECAUSE NOW, VIRGIN GALACTIC ADMITS IT "FAKED" THE VIDEO OF 206 00:10:48,614 --> 00:10:52,718 BRANSON'S PRE-LAUNCH BIKE RIDE. 207 00:10:52,785 --> 00:10:54,353 ( BOOING ) WHAT? 208 00:10:54,420 --> 00:10:55,021 IT WAS ALL FAKE? 209 00:10:55,087 --> 00:10:55,788 WHAT ELSE ARE YOU LYING ABOUT? 210 00:10:55,855 --> 00:11:00,192 IS THAT ROCKET EVEN A REAL VIRGIN? 211 00:11:00,259 --> 00:11:01,160 ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE ) 212 00:11:01,227 --> 00:11:04,163 IN A STATEMENT, A VIRGIN GALACTIC SPOKESPERSON 213 00:11:04,230 --> 00:11:06,565 BACKPEDALED ON CYCLEGATE: "THE FOOTAGE OF SIR RICHARD 214 00:11:06,632 --> 00:11:11,570 BRANSON SHOWN DURING THE EVENT SUNDAY WAS PRE-RECORDED, AND 215 00:11:11,637 --> 00:11:14,840 MISIDENTIFIED IN THE BROADCAST." 216 00:11:14,907 --> 00:11:17,176 OKAY, IT WAS JUST MISIDENTIFIED. 217 00:11:17,243 --> 00:11:19,545 THERE'S NO REASON ANYONE SHOULD ACTUALLY BELIEVE THAT RICHARD 218 00:11:19,612 --> 00:11:22,214 BRANSON ARRIVED ON BICYCLE. 219 00:11:22,281 --> 00:11:26,852 RIGHT, RICHARD BRANSON IN THAT SAME LIVESTREAM? 220 00:11:26,919 --> 00:11:31,057 >> SO AWESOME TO ARRIVE ON BICYCLE ACROSS THIS BEAUTIFUL 221 00:11:31,123 --> 00:11:35,795 NEW MEXICO COUNTRYSIDE. 222 00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:38,864 ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: OH, SORRY I'M 223 00:11:38,931 --> 00:11:39,398 LATE! 224 00:11:39,465 --> 00:11:46,939 I, UH -- I JUST, UH... 225 00:11:47,006 --> 00:11:48,340 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( PIANO RIFF ) 226 00:11:48,407 --> 00:11:55,047 -- JUST, JUST TOOK A QUICK SPIN AROUND THE BLOCK ON MY BIKE 227 00:11:55,114 --> 00:11:56,282 WHILE WE PLAYED THAT CLIP. 228 00:11:56,348 --> 00:11:57,716 ALSO, IT'S PRETTY BOLD TO LIE WHEN YOU'RE LITERALLY IN A TOWN 229 00:11:57,783 --> 00:12:02,121 CALLED TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES, NEW MEXICO. 230 00:12:02,188 --> 00:12:06,492 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I WISH IT ENDED THERE. 231 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,828 BUT I HAVE PERSONALLY UNCOVERED ANOTHER SCANDAL SURROUNDING THE 232 00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:11,063 VIRGIN GALACTIC SPACE LAUNCH. 233 00:12:11,130 --> 00:12:14,834 YOU SEE, BRANSON WAS OUR GUEST TUESDAY NIGHT, AND HE GAVE ME A 234 00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:17,970 PICTURE THAT HE SAID HE TOOK WITH HIM TO SPACE. 235 00:12:18,037 --> 00:12:18,871 TAKE A LOOK. 236 00:12:18,938 --> 00:12:22,408 >> I PROMISED TO TAKE THIS PERSON TO SPACE. 237 00:12:22,475 --> 00:12:26,545 SO WE'RE TAKING OUT A PICTURE OF THIS PERSON UP. 238 00:12:26,612 --> 00:12:28,781 WE DON'T WANT IT TO WEIGH TOO MUCH BECAUSE EVERY LITTLE BIT OF 239 00:12:28,848 --> 00:12:31,050 WEIGHT COUNTS. 240 00:12:31,117 --> 00:12:32,852 PUT HIM IN MY TOP POCKET. 241 00:12:32,918 --> 00:12:35,321 ONE SMALL PHOTO FOR STEPHEN COLBERT, ONE GIANT LEAP FOR 242 00:12:35,387 --> 00:12:37,590 MANKIND. 243 00:12:37,656 --> 00:12:38,958 THIS HAS BEEN TO SPACE, AND I WOULD LIKE TO-- 244 00:12:39,024 --> 00:12:43,062 >> STEPHEN: THANK YOU. 245 00:12:43,129 --> 00:12:46,098 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) THAT WAS REALLY A LOVELY MOMENT 246 00:12:46,165 --> 00:12:49,201 FOR ME BECAUSE IT WAS A CULMINATION OF MY CHILDHOOD 247 00:12:49,268 --> 00:12:50,836 DREAMS. 248 00:12:50,903 --> 00:12:52,304 OR WAS IT? 249 00:12:52,371 --> 00:12:55,040 BECAUSE, JIM-- CAN YOU PUNCH IN ON THAT VIDEO BRANSON SHOWED? 250 00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:57,243 THERE HE IS, CUTTING MY PHOTO OFF RIGHT UNDER THE CHIN! 251 00:12:57,309 --> 00:12:59,044 FREEZE IT THERE! 252 00:12:59,111 --> 00:13:05,217 NOW PUT UP THE PHOTO HE GAVE ME! 253 00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:06,118 ( AUDIENCE REACTS ) CLEARLY -- CLEARLY -- 254 00:13:06,185 --> 00:13:08,787 >> Jon: OH! 255 00:13:08,854 --> 00:13:09,021 OH! 256 00:13:09,088 --> 00:13:10,256 OH! 257 00:13:10,322 --> 00:13:11,157 COME ON! 258 00:13:11,223 --> 00:13:15,060 >> Stephen: -- CLEARLY SHOWS MY NECKTIE AND 259 00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:16,095 HALF OF MY CHEST. 260 00:13:16,162 --> 00:13:16,862 THAT'S NOT MY SPACE PICTURE! 261 00:13:16,929 --> 00:13:18,330 TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES, SIR RICHARD. 262 00:13:18,397 --> 00:13:19,165 DID THIS PICTURE GO TO SPACE? 263 00:13:19,231 --> 00:13:24,703 OR AM I JUST ANOTHER BIKE RIDE TO YOU? 264 00:13:24,770 --> 00:13:29,041 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Jon: AAAHHH! 265 00:13:29,108 --> 00:13:29,808 AAAHHH! 266 00:13:29,875 --> 00:13:32,845 >> Stephen: WE'VE GOT TO FIND OUT! 267 00:13:32,912 --> 00:13:35,681 I GIVE THE MAN A BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT -- 268 00:13:35,748 --> 00:13:37,416 EITHER I'VE BEEN LIED TO, OR THERE'S A SIMPLER EXPLANATION: 269 00:13:37,483 --> 00:13:39,485 THE MAN WHO GAVE ME THAT PHOTO IS NOT THE REAL RICHARD BRANSON. 270 00:13:39,552 --> 00:13:43,055 WHEN HE WENT TO SPACE, HE WAS REPLACED BY THE RICHARD BRANSON 271 00:13:43,122 --> 00:13:45,090 FROM THE MIRROR UNIVERSE FROM THAT "STAR TREK" EPISODE WITH 272 00:13:45,157 --> 00:13:47,059 SPOCK AND EVIL SPOCK. 273 00:13:47,126 --> 00:13:50,829 THINK ABOUT IT: EVER SINCE BRANSON RETURNED FROM SPACE, 274 00:13:50,896 --> 00:13:52,765 HE'S HAD THAT RIDICULOUS GOATEE. 275 00:13:52,831 --> 00:13:56,735 WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU TONIGHT. 276 00:13:56,802 --> 00:13:58,704 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) MY GUEST IS HUGH JACKMAN. 277 00:13:58,771 --> 00:14:02,841 AND LATER, A SPECIAL PERFORMANCE ON THE ROOF OF THE ED SULLIVAN 278 00:14:02,908 --> 00:14:03,676 BY LORDE. 279 00:14:03,742 --> 00:14:06,145 BUT WHEN WE COME BACK, "MEANWHILE!" 280 00:14:29,468 --> 00:14:43,582 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪♪ 281 00:14:43,649 --> 00:14:45,117 >> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY! 282 00:14:45,184 --> 00:14:51,323 GIVE IT UP FOR JON BATISTE AND "STAY HUMAN"! 283 00:14:51,390 --> 00:14:53,792 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Jon: YEAH! 284 00:14:53,859 --> 00:14:54,560 OH! 285 00:14:54,627 --> 00:14:56,295 >> Stephen: CHEERS. 286 00:14:56,362 --> 00:14:58,831 >> Jon: HE'S ON FIRE! 287 00:14:58,897 --> 00:15:01,567 HE'S ON FIRE! 288 00:15:01,634 --> 00:15:04,169 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: THIS? 289 00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:13,545 WHAT ARE WE SHOOTING FOR? 290 00:15:13,612 --> 00:15:17,783 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( LAUGHTER ) 291 00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:19,385 >> Stephen: FOLKS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, YOU KNOW I SPEND A 292 00:15:19,451 --> 00:15:21,553 LOT OF TIME DELICATELY WHITTLING A 293 00:15:21,620 --> 00:15:25,257 MELANGE OF THE DAY'S MOST PRESSING STORY TIMBERS, 294 00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:29,628 PRECISELY MEASURING THE NECKS, RIBS, AND BACKS OF THE NEWS, 295 00:15:29,695 --> 00:15:31,697 EMPLOYING ONLY THE MOST SOPHISTICATED AND TOPICAL 296 00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:36,568 PURFLING, THEN LAYING 15 EXQUISITE COATS OF INSIGHT ONTO 297 00:15:36,635 --> 00:15:39,605 THE ORNATE YET ROBUST STRADIVARIUS VIOLIN THAT IS MY 298 00:15:39,672 --> 00:15:41,273 MONOLOGUE. 299 00:15:41,340 --> 00:15:43,709 BUT SOMETIMES, SOMETIMES, FOLKS, I GATHER UP FRAYED ELECTRICAL 300 00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:47,880 WIRE FROM A BURNT-OUT BOWLING ALLEY, TAPE IT TO A 301 00:15:47,946 --> 00:15:49,882 TERMITE-INFESTED 2X4, THEN SHOVE ONE END INTO A DISCARDED CHUM 302 00:15:49,948 --> 00:15:54,119 BUCKET TO MAKE THE APPALACHIAN DRIFTER'S BANJO OF NEWS THAT IS 303 00:15:54,186 --> 00:16:01,694 MY SEGMENT: >> "MEANWHILE!" 304 00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:07,132 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: THERE YOU GO. 305 00:16:07,199 --> 00:16:13,672 A TRYING TO FOR THE -- A DELIGHT FOR THE EYES. 306 00:16:13,739 --> 00:16:15,841 MEANWHILE, THE OLYMPICS ARE SET TO BE ONE OF 307 00:16:15,908 --> 00:16:17,876 THE HOTTEST IN HISTORY, BUT TEAM U.S.A. HAS A SECRET WEAPON TO 308 00:16:17,943 --> 00:16:21,880 KEEP COOL: AIR-CONDITIONED JACKETS, THAT CONTAIN A 309 00:16:21,947 --> 00:16:25,684 BATTERY-POWERED DEVICE PLACED ON THE BACK OF THE JACKET, BLASTING 310 00:16:25,751 --> 00:16:29,688 THE WEARER'S NECK WITH COLD AIR IN A SIMILAR WAY TO HOW 311 00:16:29,755 --> 00:16:30,856 COMPUTERS ARE KEPT COOL. 312 00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:33,892 JUST BE CAREFUL NOT TO KNOCK YOUR COFFEE ONTO YOUR OLYMPIAN 313 00:16:33,959 --> 00:16:37,696 OR YOU'LL HAVE TO BUY A WHOLE NEW ATHLETE, AND THE COMPANY 314 00:16:37,763 --> 00:16:39,064 WILL NOT PAY FOR IT. 315 00:16:39,131 --> 00:16:42,868 THE I.T. GUY JUST SENT OUT AN EMAIL ABOUT THIS. 316 00:16:42,935 --> 00:16:45,871 ( LAUGHTER ) MEANWHILE, VAN LEEUWEN AND KRAFT 317 00:16:45,938 --> 00:16:49,308 ARE DEBUTING A MAC AND CHEESE-FLAVORED ICE CREAM. 318 00:16:49,375 --> 00:16:49,675 OKAY. 319 00:16:49,742 --> 00:16:50,075 FINE. 320 00:16:50,142 --> 00:16:53,879 YOU KNOW WHAT? 321 00:16:53,946 --> 00:16:56,682 I'M IN THE ICE CREAM BIZ. 322 00:16:56,749 --> 00:16:57,649 OKAY? 323 00:16:57,716 --> 00:16:59,985 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) I WILL NOT BE OUTDONE! 324 00:17:00,052 --> 00:17:05,891 WHAT THE HELL, SINCE CLEARLY NOTHING MEANS 325 00:17:05,958 --> 00:17:07,760 ANYTHING ANYMORE, BEN AND JERRY'S AND I ARE TEAMING UP 326 00:17:07,826 --> 00:17:10,262 WITH HUNGRY MAN TO CREATE "AMERICONE DINNERS." 327 00:17:10,329 --> 00:17:13,699 PREMIUM ICE CREAM THAT TASTES LIKE THINGS THAT YOU DON'T WANT 328 00:17:13,766 --> 00:17:14,967 IN YOUR ICE CREAM. 329 00:17:15,033 --> 00:17:17,870 WITH FLAVORS LIKE HOMESTYLE MINT CHOCOLATE MEATLOAF, AND BONELESS 330 00:17:17,936 --> 00:17:21,840 HAM-STACHIO. 331 00:17:21,907 --> 00:17:25,377 THE KRAFT-VAN LEEUWEN FLAVOR MERGER WAS ANNOUNCED VIA 332 00:17:25,444 --> 00:17:28,914 INSTAGRAM, WITH A PICTURE OF THE ICE CREAM WITH THE CAPTION: 333 00:17:28,981 --> 00:17:30,149 "IT'S HAPPENING." 334 00:17:30,215 --> 00:17:31,683 WHICH IS ALSO WHAT YOU'LL SHOUT WHILE RUNNING TO THE BATHROOM 335 00:17:31,750 --> 00:17:37,689 MOMENTS AFTER EATING THIS ICE CREAM. 336 00:17:37,756 --> 00:17:44,997 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Jon: COME ON, VAN LEEUWEN. 337 00:17:45,063 --> 00:17:46,865 MEANWHILE, IN SUBTERRANEAN RECREATION NEWS, A MICHIGAN MAN 338 00:17:46,932 --> 00:17:48,400 FOUND 160 BOWLING BALLS UNDER HIS HOME. 339 00:17:48,467 --> 00:17:49,701 OH MY GOD! 340 00:17:49,768 --> 00:17:51,870 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? 341 00:17:51,937 --> 00:17:54,807 HIS HOUSE IS BUILT ON AN ANCIENT BOWLING BALL BURIAL GROUND! 342 00:17:54,873 --> 00:17:56,208 GET OUT OF THERE BEFORE YOU'RE POSSESSED BY THE GHOST OF THE 343 00:17:56,275 --> 00:18:00,946 SHOE RENTAL GUY! 344 00:18:01,013 --> 00:18:03,282 ( LAUGHTER ) MEANWHILE, POPEYES' CHICKEN 345 00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:12,891 SANDWICH IS SO POPULAR, IT'S ADDING NUGGETS TO THE MENU. 346 00:18:12,958 --> 00:18:14,026 WAIT, WAIT, POPEYES CHICKEN DID NOT ALREADY HAVE CHICKEN 347 00:18:14,092 --> 00:18:15,294 NUGGETS? 348 00:18:15,360 --> 00:18:16,462 NEXT YOU'RE GOING TO TELL ME THE BURGER KING ISN'T ACTUALLY 349 00:18:16,528 --> 00:18:19,698 ROYALTY-- WHAT?! 350 00:18:19,765 --> 00:18:25,704 A HEAD THAT BIG HAS TO BE FROM CENTURIES OF INBREEDING! 351 00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:29,875 ( LAUGHTER ) MEANWHILE, OVER IN EUROPE, AN 352 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:37,683 ITALIAN ARTIST SOLD AN INVISIBLE SCULPTURE FOR $18,000. 353 00:18:37,749 --> 00:18:41,887 WHICH... I... BOUGHT! 354 00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:47,426 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) PROVE I DIDN'T! 355 00:18:47,493 --> 00:18:51,196 I TELL YOU WHAT, I DON'T WANT THIS TO BLOCK THE CAMERA, SO 356 00:18:51,263 --> 00:18:57,870 I'LL MOVE THIS OVER HERE NEXT TO MY GOOD FRIEND 357 00:18:57,936 --> 00:19:01,673 FRODO BAGGINS. 358 00:19:01,740 --> 00:19:05,410 ( LAUGHTER ) BUT, THERE MAY BE A PROBLEM WITH 359 00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:06,612 MY NEW PURCHASE. 360 00:19:06,678 --> 00:19:07,813 APPARENTLY, ANOTHER ARTIST IS "THREATENING TO SUE THE ARTIST 361 00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:09,014 WHOSE INVISIBLE SCULPTURE SOLD FOR $18,000, SAYING HE CAME UP 362 00:19:09,081 --> 00:19:10,215 WITH THE IDEA FIRST." 363 00:19:10,282 --> 00:19:13,285 WAIT, ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT MY BRAND NEW, $18,000 INVISIBLE 364 00:19:13,352 --> 00:19:17,289 SCULPTURE MIGHT BE A FAKE? 365 00:19:17,356 --> 00:19:21,093 APPARENTLY, ARTIST "TOM MILLER SAYS HE MADE AN INVISIBLE 366 00:19:21,159 --> 00:19:27,099 SCULPTURE IN 2016, AND HE IS DEMANDING VISIBILITY." 367 00:19:27,165 --> 00:19:29,268 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) REALLY? 368 00:19:29,334 --> 00:19:31,103 REALLY? 369 00:19:31,169 --> 00:19:36,208 DEMANDING VISIBILITY FOR YOUR INVISIBLE SCULPTURE? 370 00:19:36,275 --> 00:19:37,409 CLEARLY YOU DON'T GET IT, OKAY? 371 00:19:37,476 --> 00:19:39,344 THE WHOLE POINT OF THE PIECE IS CREATING A DIALOGUE BETWEEN 372 00:19:39,411 --> 00:19:45,083 PHYSICAL SPACE AND NONEXISTENCE THAT SPEAKS TO A PRIMORDIAL NEED 373 00:19:45,150 --> 00:19:49,288 WITHIN THE ARTIST TO "GET CASH." 374 00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:56,261 ( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) 375 00:19:56,328 --> 00:19:59,565 BOTH THOSE GUYS LOOK LIKE A LOT OF FUN. 376 00:19:59,631 --> 00:20:01,266 ( LAUGHTER ) MEANWHILE, "17 MILLION GALLONS 377 00:20:01,333 --> 00:20:05,304 OF SEWAGE WERE DUMPED INTO SANTA MONICA BAY," AND AS OF THIS 378 00:20:05,370 --> 00:20:08,874 WEEK, "BEACHES FROM EL SEGUNDO TO THE DOCKWEILER R.V. PARK WERE 379 00:20:08,941 --> 00:20:09,341 CLOSED FOR SWIMMING." 380 00:20:09,408 --> 00:20:12,311 TOO BAD. 381 00:20:12,377 --> 00:20:13,712 I KNOW WHEN I WANT TO SWIM IN PURE, TOXIN-FREE WATERS, I 382 00:20:13,779 --> 00:20:15,080 ALWAYS LOOK FOR THE NEAREST R.V. 383 00:20:15,147 --> 00:20:19,418 PARK. 384 00:20:19,484 --> 00:20:22,387 ( LAUGHTER ) OFFICIALS SAY THE SPILL WAS DUE 385 00:20:22,454 --> 00:20:28,060 TO A NEARBY PROCESSING FACILITY TRIGGERING "AN EMERGENCY DUMP." 386 00:20:28,126 --> 00:20:32,864 ( LAUGHTER ) ALSO, I'M GUESSING, WHAT'S 387 00:20:32,931 --> 00:20:37,035 TRIGGERED BY KRAFT MAC AND CHEESE ICE CREAM. 388 00:20:37,102 --> 00:20:40,505 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) YOU KNOW WHAT? 389 00:20:40,572 --> 00:20:40,973 YOU KNOW WHAT? 390 00:20:41,039 --> 00:20:41,607 I'M BEING UNFAIR. 391 00:20:41,673 --> 00:20:42,941 >> Jon: I LIKE THAT! 392 00:20:43,008 --> 00:20:44,710 >> Stephen: YOU KNOW WHAT, JON? 393 00:20:44,776 --> 00:20:48,580 I AM BEING UNFAIR. 394 00:20:48,647 --> 00:20:53,151 AFTER MAKING SO MUCH FUN OF THIS ICE CREAM, LET'S GIVE IT A 395 00:20:53,218 --> 00:20:54,052 WHIRL. 396 00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:56,188 ( APPLAUSE ) THERE'S THE ACTUAL ICE CREAM. 397 00:20:56,254 --> 00:20:57,155 THERE WE GO. 398 00:20:57,222 --> 00:21:00,058 THERE WE GO. 399 00:21:00,125 --> 00:21:00,926 GIVE IT A SHAKE. 400 00:21:00,993 --> 00:21:03,428 GIVE IT A SHAKE. 401 00:21:03,495 --> 00:21:06,365 IT'S HAPPENING! 402 00:21:06,431 --> 00:21:08,800 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH HUGH JACKMAN. 403 00:21:08,867 --> 00:21:09,334 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪♪ 404 00:21:18,677 --> 00:21:30,255 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪♪ 405 00:21:30,322 --> 00:21:33,058 >> Stephen: WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY! 406 00:21:33,125 --> 00:21:34,326 MY GUEST TONIGHT -- ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) 407 00:21:34,393 --> 00:21:38,096 I'M EXCITED, TOO. 408 00:21:38,163 --> 00:21:44,569 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY GUEST THIS EVENING IS A TONY AND 409 00:21:44,636 --> 00:21:45,971 EMMY AWARD-WINNING ACTOR YOU KNOW FROM "X-MEN," "LES MIS," 410 00:21:46,038 --> 00:21:47,606 AND "THE GREATEST SHOWMAN." 411 00:21:47,673 --> 00:21:57,649 HE NOW STARS IN THE NEW MOVIE, "REMINISCENCE." 412 00:21:57,716 --> 00:22:40,058 HE NOW STARS IN THE NEW MOVIE, "REMINISCENCE." 413 00:22:40,125 --> 00:22:40,859 ( GRUNTING SOUNDS ) >> Stephen: PLEASE WELCOME 414 00:22:40,926 --> 00:22:43,562 BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW" HUGH JACKMAN! 415 00:22:43,628 --> 00:22:50,402 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪♪ 416 00:22:50,469 --> 00:23:00,445 >> THANK YOU! 417 00:23:00,512 --> 00:23:05,484 >> THANK YOU! 418 00:23:07,686 --> 00:23:15,560 >> Stephen: WOW! 419 00:23:15,627 --> 00:23:17,529 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> WOW! 420 00:23:17,596 --> 00:23:19,564 >> Stephen: GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 421 00:23:19,631 --> 00:23:20,632 >> WOW! 422 00:23:20,699 --> 00:23:21,133 WHOO! 423 00:23:21,199 --> 00:23:22,367 >> Stephen: WELCOME. 424 00:23:22,434 --> 00:23:23,335 WELCOME. 425 00:23:23,401 --> 00:23:24,469 >> THAT'S SOMETHING COMING OUT OF THE PERCHING. 426 00:23:24,536 --> 00:23:29,441 THIS IS THE FIRST I'VE HAD -- THE FIRST EVER ALL OF YOU. 427 00:23:29,508 --> 00:23:31,943 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: WHAT AN HONOR. 428 00:23:32,010 --> 00:23:33,145 IT FEELS GOOD. 429 00:23:33,211 --> 00:23:36,381 >> Stephen: SO, OKAY, WE HAVE NOT SPOKEN SINCE THE PANDEMIC 430 00:23:36,448 --> 00:23:37,082 BEGAN. 431 00:23:37,149 --> 00:23:38,016 >> YEAH. 432 00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:38,784 >> Stephen: WE HAVEN'T SPOKEN SINCE BEFORE. 433 00:23:38,850 --> 00:23:41,453 HOW FARED YOU DURING THE PANDEMIC? 434 00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:43,588 OBVIOUSLY, IT WAS NEVER A GREAT SITUATION. 435 00:23:43,655 --> 00:23:44,556 >> NO. 436 00:23:44,623 --> 00:23:45,223 >> Stephen: BUT WHAT TID YOU DO WITH YOURSELF? 437 00:23:45,290 --> 00:23:46,792 >> I WAS HERE, YOU WERE HERE. 438 00:23:46,858 --> 00:23:48,160 >> Stephen: BUT YOU WERE IN NEW YORK. 439 00:23:48,226 --> 00:23:51,630 >> I WAS IN NEW YORK, SO I WAS HERE THE WHOLE TIME, AND IT 440 00:23:51,696 --> 00:23:53,665 WAS -- OH, PICK AN ADJECTIVE. 441 00:23:53,732 --> 00:23:54,666 IT WAS EVERYTHING. 442 00:23:54,733 --> 00:23:57,435 IT WAS FRIGHTENING, IT WAS WEIRD, IT WAS STRANGE. 443 00:23:57,502 --> 00:24:01,173 I HAD MY 16-YEAR-OLD AND 21-YEAR-OLD WITH ME ALL THE 444 00:24:01,239 --> 00:24:02,507 TIME, HATING IT ALL THE TIME. 445 00:24:02,574 --> 00:24:04,810 >> Stephen: BECAUSE THEY'RE STUCK WITH YOU. 446 00:24:04,876 --> 00:24:08,313 >> RIGHT, WHAT 16-YEAR-OLD AND 21-YEAR-OLD WANTS TO HAVE NINE 447 00:24:08,380 --> 00:24:09,881 MONTHS WITH THEIR PARENTS? 448 00:24:09,948 --> 00:24:12,617 AND THE PARENTS ARE, LIKE, MONOPOLY! 449 00:24:12,684 --> 00:24:15,754 >> Stephen: LET'S DO A PUZZLE! 450 00:24:15,821 --> 00:24:18,290 LET'S MAKE SOME BREAD! 451 00:24:18,356 --> 00:24:20,625 LITERALLY, OH, THIS IS THE WORST. 452 00:24:20,692 --> 00:24:23,962 BUT, YOU KNOW, IT WAS SUCH A BIZARRE SITUATION, AND, YOU 453 00:24:24,029 --> 00:24:27,499 KNOW, BEING HERE -- I JUST WAS FILLED WITH SUCH GRATITUDE FOR 454 00:24:27,566 --> 00:24:32,204 THE PEOPLE WHO WERE GOING AT IT EVERY SINGLE DAY MAKING IT 455 00:24:32,270 --> 00:24:33,238 POSSIBLE. 456 00:24:33,305 --> 00:24:33,839 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: THE ESSENTIAL 457 00:24:33,905 --> 00:24:35,140 WORKERS, HOSPITAL WORKERS. 458 00:24:35,207 --> 00:24:36,174 >> YEAH. 459 00:24:36,241 --> 00:24:40,145 >> Stephen: DID YOU GO BACK TO - BACK TO AUSTRALIA? 460 00:24:40,212 --> 00:24:42,247 >> WELL, I JUST WENT DOWN NOW. 461 00:24:42,314 --> 00:24:43,615 AUSTRALIA IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. 462 00:24:43,682 --> 00:24:46,818 I MEAN, THEY'RE HAVING A BIT OF AN OUTBREAK RIGHT NOW, BUT FOR 463 00:24:46,885 --> 00:24:50,255 MANY MONTHS, THERE WAS NOT ONE CASE, ZERO CASES ACROSS THE 464 00:24:50,322 --> 00:24:51,423 COUNTRY. 465 00:24:51,489 --> 00:24:54,292 I ACTUALLY HAD TO GO INTO A HOTEL QUARANTINE FOR TWO WEEKS 466 00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:56,061 WHEN I WENT DOWN THERE. 467 00:24:56,127 --> 00:24:58,363 SO EVERYONE ARRIVES, GOES INTO A HOTEL -- 468 00:24:58,430 --> 00:25:00,365 >> Stephen: WHAT DID YOU LEARN ABOUT YOURSELF IN THAT 469 00:25:00,432 --> 00:25:01,066 QUARANTINE? 470 00:25:01,132 --> 00:25:03,068 IT'S LIKE AN ISOLATION CHAMBER. 471 00:25:03,134 --> 00:25:04,102 >> YEAH. 472 00:25:04,169 --> 00:25:06,204 >> Stephen: WHAT DOES HUGH JACKMAN LEARN ABOUT HUGH 473 00:25:06,271 --> 00:25:06,738 JACKMAN? 474 00:25:06,805 --> 00:25:07,772 >> I'M REALLY BORING. 475 00:25:07,839 --> 00:25:09,507 ( LAUGHTER ) IT TURNS OUT -- LIKE, YOU KNOW, 476 00:25:09,574 --> 00:25:15,347 I SAY, OH, MY WIFE IS THE BEST THING ABOUT ME, IT'S TRUE. 477 00:25:15,413 --> 00:25:21,753 LITERALLY, WITHOUT HER THERE, IT'S, LIKE, JUST TELL ME SOME 478 00:25:21,820 --> 00:25:22,287 STORIES. 479 00:25:22,354 --> 00:25:23,421 IT WAS A LITTLE WEIRD. 480 00:25:23,488 --> 00:25:26,258 >> Stephen: IF YOU'RE IN A HOTEL ROOM AND BORED OF BEING 481 00:25:26,324 --> 00:25:29,160 HUGH JACKMAN, YOU SHOULD CHECK OUT THE PAY-PER-VIEW MOVIES 482 00:25:29,227 --> 00:25:33,498 BECAUSE THERE ARE SOME REALLY GOOD HUGH JACKMAN MOVIES ON 483 00:25:33,565 --> 00:25:34,699 PAY-PER-VIEW. 484 00:25:34,766 --> 00:25:38,904 >> OF COURSE, I WATCHED THEM, BUT THAT'S, LIKE, TEN HOURS A 485 00:25:38,970 --> 00:25:40,171 DAY. 486 00:25:40,238 --> 00:25:48,046 AFTER THAT, WHAT DO YOU DO? 487 00:25:48,113 --> 00:25:48,947 MY KIDS WATCH THEM. 488 00:25:49,014 --> 00:25:49,614 THAT'S NORMAL, RIGHT. 489 00:25:49,681 --> 00:25:50,649 >> Stephen: I MAKE THEM WATCH 490 00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:51,116 MY SHOW. 491 00:25:51,182 --> 00:25:52,851 >> I KNOW YOU DO. 492 00:25:52,918 --> 00:25:56,021 >> Stephen: WHEN BROADWAY GETS BACK UP, IT'S ONE OF THE MORE 493 00:25:56,087 --> 00:25:59,190 EXCITING THINGS I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS FALL IS WHEN, 494 00:25:59,257 --> 00:26:09,301 COME SEPTEMBER, BROADWAY'S GOING TO OPEN BACK UP 495 00:26:09,367 --> 00:26:12,103 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) AND ONE OF THE THINGS I'M MOST 496 00:26:12,170 --> 00:26:16,541 EXCITED ABOUT IS I LOOK OUT ONE OF MY OFFICE WINDOWS, I LOOK OUT 497 00:26:16,608 --> 00:26:18,276 AT A BILLBOARD AT YOU. 498 00:26:18,343 --> 00:26:19,344 >> RIGHT. 499 00:26:19,411 --> 00:26:22,881 >> Stephen: AS HAROLD HILL FROM THE MUSIC MAN BECAUSE 500 00:26:22,948 --> 00:26:26,451 YOU'RE GOING TO BE AT THE WINTER GARDEN THIS WINTER AS THE MUSIC 501 00:26:26,518 --> 00:26:27,052 MAN. 502 00:26:27,118 --> 00:26:27,852 >> JUST OVER THERE, RIGHT. 503 00:26:27,919 --> 00:26:29,821 >> Stephen: JUST OVER THERE, EXACTLY. 504 00:26:29,888 --> 00:26:32,958 >> WE COUD DO A JUMP SWAP, IT'S LIKE TWO BLOCKS AWAY. 505 00:26:33,024 --> 00:26:39,064 >> Stephen: SURE. 506 00:26:39,130 --> 00:26:40,465 ( SINGING ) ♪ 507 00:26:40,532 --> 00:26:50,208 ♪ GOOD NIGHT LADIES ♪ ♪ GOOD NIGHT LADIES ♪ 508 00:26:50,275 --> 00:26:52,744 >> YOU WERE AHEAD OF ME, HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW? 509 00:26:52,811 --> 00:26:56,982 >> Stephen: THAT'S ALL I KNOW. 510 00:26:57,048 --> 00:27:00,051 HE'S A MUSIC MAN, HE SELLS DRUM BONES. 511 00:27:00,118 --> 00:27:02,587 THE PICK ALOE. 512 00:27:02,654 --> 00:27:05,657 THE SHINY GOLD BRAID ON THE COAT. 513 00:27:05,724 --> 00:27:11,396 I DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT BANDS BUT YOU CAN'T MAKE A LIVING 514 00:27:11,463 --> 00:27:13,965 SELLING BIG TROMBONES. 515 00:27:14,032 --> 00:27:19,137 I DON'T KNOW HOW HE DOES IT BUT HE LIVES LIKE A KING AND WHEN A 516 00:27:19,204 --> 00:27:20,872 MAN DANCES, THE PIPE BASS SAID YES, SIR, YES, SIR! 517 00:27:20,939 --> 00:27:24,342 THAT'S IT. 518 00:27:24,409 --> 00:27:33,318 >> Stephen: THAT IS OFFICIALLY - THIS IS YOUR RETURN TO BROADWAY 519 00:27:33,385 --> 00:27:36,621 TONIGHT. 520 00:27:36,688 --> 00:27:37,722 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪♪ 521 00:27:37,789 --> 00:27:38,923 >> WE'RE DONE. 522 00:27:38,990 --> 00:27:40,125 >> Stephen: DONE. 523 00:27:40,191 --> 00:27:42,560 HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED THIS PART BEFORE BECAUSE YOU SEEM LIKE A 524 00:27:42,627 --> 00:27:44,295 NATURAL FOR HAROLD HILL. 525 00:27:44,362 --> 00:27:47,599 >> THE FIRST THING I DID IN HIGH SCHOOL IS THE MUSIC MAN. 526 00:27:47,665 --> 00:27:49,434 I WAS SALESMAN NUMBER TWO. 527 00:27:49,501 --> 00:27:51,336 >> Stephen: WHO'S SALESMAN NUMBER TWO? 528 00:27:51,403 --> 00:27:54,005 THE ONE HAROLD HILL KEEPS RUINING. 529 00:27:54,072 --> 00:27:55,173 >> HE'S A WHAT? 530 00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:56,541 HE'S A WHAT? 531 00:27:56,608 --> 00:27:58,610 >> Stephen: OH, THAT GUY. 532 00:27:58,676 --> 00:27:59,344 MUSIC MAN. 533 00:27:59,411 --> 00:28:00,011 THAT'S IT. 534 00:28:00,078 --> 00:28:03,314 A LOT OF STANDING THERE WITH. 535 00:28:03,381 --> 00:28:13,591 ♪ OH THE WELLS FARGO WAGON IS A COMIN' DOWN ♪ 536 00:28:13,658 --> 00:28:14,926 ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: THIS IS YOU 537 00:28:14,993 --> 00:28:22,700 WORKING ON THE OLD TAP DANCE. 538 00:28:22,767 --> 00:28:26,838 ( TAPPING ) >> Stephen: OKAY, OBVIOUS 539 00:28:46,524 --> 00:28:49,094 QUESTION HERE IS THAT DOESN'T LOOK EASY. 540 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:52,497 WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO TRAIN HARDER FOR? 541 00:28:52,564 --> 00:28:56,634 HAROLD HILL AND THE MUSIC MAN OR "WOLVERINE"? 542 00:28:56,701 --> 00:28:58,136 DIFFERENT TRAINING, OBVIOUSLY. 543 00:28:58,203 --> 00:29:00,638 >> I'M STILL GOING TO SAY WOLVERINE PROBABLY. 544 00:29:00,705 --> 00:29:01,706 >> Stephen: REALLY. 545 00:29:01,773 --> 00:29:03,575 I HAVE REALLY BEEN GOING A YEAR AND A HALF. 546 00:29:03,641 --> 00:29:05,376 WE KEPT REHEARSING. 547 00:29:05,443 --> 00:29:09,280 IT'S BEEN A YEAR AND A HALF WE HAVE BEEN REHEARSING FOR THIS. 548 00:29:09,347 --> 00:29:13,051 SO IT CERTAINLY TAKES ME A LOT LONGER. 549 00:29:13,118 --> 00:29:15,120 I'M NOT LIKE A TRAINED DANCER. 550 00:29:15,186 --> 00:29:16,254 I WASN'T A TRAINED SINGER. 551 00:29:16,321 --> 00:29:20,291 >> Stephen: YOU'RE NOT A TRAINED DANCER, FROM OZ AND ALL 552 00:29:20,358 --> 00:29:20,859 THAT? 553 00:29:20,925 --> 00:29:21,726 >> I'M JUST PRETENDING. 554 00:29:21,793 --> 00:29:23,328 >> Stephen: YOU'RE ACTING LIKE A DANCER. 555 00:29:23,394 --> 00:29:25,663 >> AS A KID I WASN'T. 556 00:29:25,730 --> 00:29:28,666 I'VE LEARNED AS AN ADULT, SO I HAVE TO DO THAT ALL THE TIME. 557 00:29:28,733 --> 00:29:29,767 I SING EVERY DAY. 558 00:29:29,834 --> 00:29:34,172 I HAVE SINGING LESSONS EVERY WEEK. 559 00:29:34,239 --> 00:29:36,975 YEAH, I'M LITERALLY FAKIC IT ALL. 560 00:29:37,041 --> 00:29:40,411 >> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK BUT WHEN WE COME 561 00:29:40,478 --> 00:29:42,180 BACK I'LL ASK YOU WHAT PART YOU WANTED TO PLAY IF HE GOT TO PLAY 562 00:29:42,247 --> 00:29:43,281 ANY PART HE WANTED TO PLAY. 563 00:29:43,348 --> 00:29:44,983 ( LAUGHTER ) ♪♪ 564 00:29:54,559 --> 00:29:56,060 >> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY! 565 00:29:56,127 --> 00:30:00,565 WE'RE HERE WITH THE LOVELY AND TALENTED HUGH JACKMAN! 566 00:30:00,632 --> 00:30:04,936 I'M GOING TO ASK YOU ABOUT SOME ACTORS THAT YOU'VE LEARNED FROM. 567 00:30:05,003 --> 00:30:10,675 OBVIOUSLY, OUR DEAR FRIEND AND YOURS, IAN MCKELLEN, OBVIOUSLY, 568 00:30:10,742 --> 00:30:14,345 MAGNETO FOR MANY YEARS, HIM AND PATRICK STEWART, YOU CALLED THEM 569 00:30:14,412 --> 00:30:16,481 YOUR AT THIS NIRO AND PACINO. 570 00:30:16,548 --> 00:30:20,752 WHWHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED FROM THE BY SHARING THE SCREEN? 571 00:30:20,818 --> 00:30:23,154 >> IAN IS A THEATRICAL BEAST, SO I WAS BROUGHT UP IN THE THEATER 572 00:30:23,221 --> 00:30:24,322 AS WELL. 573 00:30:24,389 --> 00:30:32,931 IT WAS ONE OF MY VERY FIRST FILMS AND HE SAYS, HUGH, DEAR 574 00:30:32,997 --> 00:30:38,069 BOY, IT'S GOING TO FEEL REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE. 575 00:30:38,136 --> 00:30:42,006 WHEN YOU'RE ON ACTING ON FILM FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE BUT IT WILL 576 00:30:42,073 --> 00:30:43,675 LOOK RIGHT, JUST GO WITH IT. 577 00:30:43,741 --> 00:30:48,012 I ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT BECAUSE WHEN YOU BEGIN IN FILM, IT'S 578 00:30:48,079 --> 00:30:49,647 STOP-START, IT'S VERY WEIRD. 579 00:30:49,714 --> 00:30:53,551 YOU'RE NEVER ACTING MORE THAN A MINUTE AT A TIME. 580 00:30:53,618 --> 00:30:58,089 YOU HAVE PEOPLE IN YOUR FACE, CAMERA, LIGHTS, IT FEELS WEIRD. 581 00:30:58,156 --> 00:31:00,692 PATRICK, I LEARNED SO MUCH FROM PATRICK, THE GREATEST TIP HE 582 00:31:00,758 --> 00:31:05,396 GAVE ME ABOUT LIFE ITSELF, NOT SO MUCH ACTING, HE SAID I 583 00:31:05,463 --> 00:31:09,100 LEARNED WHEN I WAS ABOUT 16, WISH I HAD LEARNED I WAS 584 00:31:09,167 --> 00:31:11,936 YOUNGER, I GIVE MYSELF TIME AT THE BEGINNING. 585 00:31:12,003 --> 00:31:17,742 IF HE HAS A 5:00 CALL, HE WAKES UP AT 4:00, WAKES UP WITH A CUP 586 00:31:17,809 --> 00:31:22,480 OF TEA, COMES BACK WITH HIS FAVORITE BOOK, HE SAYS, I JUST 587 00:31:22,547 --> 00:31:27,919 READ A BOOK LIKE A NOVEL, SO I KNOW THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS 588 00:31:27,986 --> 00:31:30,955 FOR THE REST OF THE DAY, I'VE HAD A HALF HOUR. 589 00:31:31,022 --> 00:31:32,290 BECAUSE EVERYONE THINKS, OH, I'LL DO IT AFTER WORK OR GO 590 00:31:32,357 --> 00:31:34,292 HOME, BUT LIFE ALWAYS GETS AWAY FROM YOU. 591 00:31:34,359 --> 00:31:38,396 SO MY WIFE AND I WAKE UP EVERY MORNING AND WE GO GET A CUP OF 592 00:31:38,463 --> 00:31:42,400 TEA, COFFEE FOR ME, AND WE SIT IN BED AND WE JUST READ. 593 00:31:42,467 --> 00:31:44,302 >> Stephen: THAT'S LOVELY. 594 00:31:44,369 --> 00:31:46,704 YOU LOOK AT ME LIKE YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME. 595 00:31:46,771 --> 00:31:49,607 >> Stephen: NO, I TOTALLY BELIEVE YOU. 596 00:31:49,674 --> 00:31:53,244 I WANT TO DO IT, I JUST DON'T WANT TO GET UP EARLY. 597 00:31:53,311 --> 00:31:54,445 >> IT'S GREAT ADVICE. 598 00:31:54,512 --> 00:31:58,283 >> Stephen: IAN, THERE'S A LOT OF TALK ABOUT IAN IS GOING TO 599 00:31:58,349 --> 00:32:02,420 PLAY HAMLET AT AGE 82, WITH I IS OBVIOUSLY IT'S A YOUNG MAN'S 600 00:32:02,487 --> 00:32:05,957 PART, BUT PEOPLE ARE SO EXCITED TO SEE HIS INTERPRETATION, 601 00:32:06,024 --> 00:32:07,158 RIGHT. 602 00:32:07,225 --> 00:32:09,527 >> Stephen: IF YOU COULD PLAY ANY PART REGARDLESS OF AGE OR 603 00:32:09,594 --> 00:32:14,032 GENDER OR WHAT WE THINK OF WOULD BE A NORMAL CAST IN THIS PART, 604 00:32:14,098 --> 00:32:18,903 WHAT WOULD YOU -- >> HE'S 82, WHO'S PLAYING HIS 605 00:32:18,970 --> 00:32:19,604 MOTHER? 606 00:32:19,671 --> 00:32:25,343 ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: SURE. 607 00:32:25,410 --> 00:32:26,311 LILLIAN GISH. 608 00:32:26,377 --> 00:32:30,381 ( LAUGHTER ) >> ANY PART I WOULD LIKE TO 609 00:32:30,448 --> 00:32:30,815 PLAY. 610 00:32:30,882 --> 00:32:32,183 >> Stephen: YES. 611 00:32:32,250 --> 00:32:34,252 KING LEAR IS THE ONE FOR ME. 612 00:32:34,319 --> 00:32:35,753 >> Stephen: I COULD SEE THAT. 613 00:32:35,820 --> 00:32:37,989 THAT WOULD BE THE ONE FOR ME. 614 00:32:38,056 --> 00:32:41,326 ( APPLAUSE ) AND BILL MURRAY'S CHARACTER IN 615 00:32:41,392 --> 00:32:43,895 CADDY SHACK, THAT'S THE OTHER ONE. 616 00:32:43,961 --> 00:32:51,936 ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: SURE, DALAI LAMA. 617 00:32:52,003 --> 00:32:53,071 ABSOLUTELY. 618 00:32:53,137 --> 00:32:57,575 WHICH WOULD BE MORE CHALLENGING, LARRY OR THE GROUNDS -- 619 00:32:57,642 --> 00:32:59,911 KING LEAR OR THE GROUNDS KEEPER? 620 00:32:59,977 --> 00:33:01,813 >> THE GROUNDS KEEPER. 621 00:33:01,879 --> 00:33:04,649 ( LAUGHTER ) WHEN I WAS AUDITIONING FOR DRAMA 622 00:33:04,716 --> 00:33:06,084 SCHOOL, YOU DO A MODERN CLASSIC WHICH WOULD BE SHAKESPEARE AND A 623 00:33:06,150 --> 00:33:07,185 MODERN PIECE. 624 00:33:07,251 --> 00:33:12,357 >> Stephen: YOU'RE ABOUT TO TELL ME SOMETHING I CAN'T 625 00:33:12,423 --> 00:33:13,591 BELIEVE. 626 00:33:13,658 --> 00:33:16,527 >> THERE WERE 17 OF US IN A ROOM AND THIS GUY GETS UP AND SAYS, 627 00:33:16,594 --> 00:33:19,063 YES, I'M GOING TO DO THE GROUNDSKEEPER FROM CADDY SHACK, 628 00:33:19,130 --> 00:33:24,902 AND EVERYONE IS GIGGLING, AND THE GUY GOES, NO, IT'S A 629 00:33:24,969 --> 00:33:25,770 CLASSIC. 630 00:33:25,837 --> 00:33:27,338 HE GOES, DUDE, HAVE YOU SEEN THAT MOVIE? 631 00:33:27,405 --> 00:33:28,573 IT'S A CLASSIC! 632 00:33:28,639 --> 00:33:32,910 ( LAUGHTER ) HE ALMOST GOT IN ON THE SPOT. 633 00:33:32,977 --> 00:33:34,112 >> Stephen: I LOVE IT. 634 00:33:34,178 --> 00:33:37,815 THE NEW MOVIE IS CALLED "REMINISCENCE," WRITTEN AND 635 00:33:37,882 --> 00:33:42,720 DIRECTED BY LISA JOY WHO IS ONE OF THE CREATORS OF "WESTWORLD." 636 00:33:42,787 --> 00:33:43,488 >> YES. 637 00:33:43,554 --> 00:33:44,522 >> Stephen: WHAT'S THE MOVIE ABOUT. 638 00:33:44,589 --> 00:33:47,258 >> HAS ANYONE HERE SEEN "WESTWORLD"? 639 00:33:47,325 --> 00:33:48,393 >> Stephen: EVERYONE. 640 00:33:48,459 --> 00:33:51,295 MART, SO IT'S GOT A LOT OF THAT TONE, VERY SMART SCI-FI, 641 00:33:51,362 --> 00:33:55,833 BUT IT'S GOT ACTION, AS YOU SAW, A LITTLE BIT OF A LOVE STORY AND 642 00:33:55,900 --> 00:33:58,469 A SUSPENSE THRILLER, SET IN THE FUTURE. 643 00:33:58,536 --> 00:34:04,909 I'M LIKE A PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR OF THE MIND. 644 00:34:04,976 --> 00:34:09,747 A REMINISCENT MACHINE ALLOWS YOU TO GO AND RELIVE MEMORIES, 645 00:34:09,814 --> 00:34:10,648 LITERALLY TOUCH AND FEEL. 646 00:34:10,715 --> 00:34:11,949 >> Stephen: SO YOU COULD GIVE THEM TO ME. 647 00:34:12,016 --> 00:34:15,686 >> BUT I HAVE TO GUIDE YOU IN SO YOU DON'T GO INTO DARK TERRITORY 648 00:34:15,753 --> 00:34:19,090 AND YOU SAFELY ARRIVE AT THAT MEMORY, NOT SOMETHING ELSE, AND 649 00:34:19,157 --> 00:34:20,258 THAT'S MY JOB. 650 00:34:20,324 --> 00:34:24,595 VERY EARLY ON A WOMAN COMES IN PLAYED BY REBECCA FERGUSON, 651 00:34:24,662 --> 00:34:27,932 SHE'S LITERALLY USING THE MACHINE TO GET HER LOST CAR 652 00:34:27,999 --> 00:34:28,733 KEYS. 653 00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:31,202 SHE SAID, I JUST WANT TO FIND THEM. 654 00:34:31,269 --> 00:34:34,839 I INSTANTLY FALL IN LOVE AND START A ROMANCE AND SHE 655 00:34:34,906 --> 00:34:36,541 DISAPPEARS AND THAT'S THE END. 656 00:34:36,607 --> 00:34:38,276 THAT'S EARLY ON IN THE MOVIE. 657 00:34:38,342 --> 00:34:41,813 AND THEN MY TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED IS REALLY WHAT THE 658 00:34:41,879 --> 00:34:43,047 STORY IS ABOUT. 659 00:34:43,114 --> 00:34:50,388 I GO INTO THIS DARK PART OF THE WORLD, AND THE WORLD ITSELF IS 660 00:34:50,455 --> 00:34:55,092 MIAMI IN THE FUTURE, IT'S PRETTY MUCH UNDERWATER. 661 00:34:55,159 --> 00:34:58,463 CLIMATE CHANGE AFFECTED THE CLIMATE SO THAT EVERYONE LIVES 662 00:34:58,529 --> 00:34:59,764 AT NIGHT. 663 00:34:59,831 --> 00:35:06,270 TO THE UNDERWORLD HAPPENS IN THE BROAD, DARK, STARLIGHT. 664 00:35:06,337 --> 00:35:08,372 IT WILL BE LIKE NOTHING YOU'VE EVER SEEN. 665 00:35:08,439 --> 00:35:09,607 >> Stephen: LOVELY TO SEE YOU. 666 00:35:09,674 --> 00:35:11,709 THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE! 667 00:35:11,776 --> 00:35:13,578 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> GOOD TO SEE YOU, MAN. 668 00:35:13,644 --> 00:35:19,116 >> Stephen: REMINISCENS WILL BE IN THEATERS AND ON HBO MAX ON 669 00:35:19,183 --> 00:35:19,884 AUGUST 20th! 670 00:35:19,951 --> 00:35:21,118 THE MAN IS HUGH JACKMAN, EVERYBODY! 671 00:35:21,185 --> 00:35:26,224 BA WITH A SPECIAL ROOFTOP PERFORMANCE BY LORDE! 672 00:35:26,290 --> 00:35:26,958 ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪♪ 673 00:35:54,752 --> 00:35:57,855 >> Stephen: AND NOW, DEBUTING THE TITLE TRACK FROM HER ALBUM 674 00:35:57,922 --> 00:36:05,563 "SOLAR POWER" HERE ON THE ROOF of the Ed Sullivan Theater, 675 00:36:05,630 --> 00:36:07,532 Lorde! 676 00:36:16,407 --> 00:36:19,510 ♪ I HATE THE WINTER CAN'T STAND THE COLD 677 00:36:19,577 --> 00:36:25,483 ♪ I TEND TO CANCEL ALL THE PLANS 678 00:36:25,550 --> 00:36:29,554 ♪ BUT WHEN THE HEAT COMES SOMETHING TAKES A HOLD 679 00:36:29,620 --> 00:36:31,489 ♪ CAN I KICK IT? 680 00:36:31,556 --> 00:36:37,495 YEAH, I CAN ♪ MY CHEEKS IN HIGH COLOUR 681 00:36:37,562 --> 00:36:41,465 OVERRIPE PEACHES ♪ NO SHIRT, NO SHOES 682 00:36:41,532 --> 00:36:44,302 ONLY MY FEATURES ♪ MY BOY BEHIND ME 683 00:36:44,368 --> 00:36:49,240 HE'S TAKING PICTURES ♪ LEAD THE BOYS AND GIRLS 684 00:36:49,307 --> 00:36:50,775 ONTO THE BEACHES ♪ COME ONE, COME ALL 685 00:36:50,841 --> 00:36:54,378 I'LL TELL YOU MY SECRETS ♪ I'M KINDA LIKE 686 00:36:54,445 --> 00:37:02,253 A PRETTIER JESUS ♪ FORGET ALL OF THE 687 00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:06,357 TEARS THAT YOU'VE CRIED ♪ IT'S OVER 688 00:37:06,424 --> 00:37:14,298 OVER, OVER, OVER, OVER ♪ IT'S A NEW STATE OF MIND 689 00:37:14,365 --> 00:37:18,369 ARE YOU COMING, MY BABY? 690 00:37:18,436 --> 00:37:22,373 ♪ ACID GREEN AQUAMARINE 691 00:37:22,440 --> 00:37:29,013 ♪ THE GIRLS ARE DANCING IN THE SAND 692 00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:33,951 ♪ AND I THROW MY CELLULAR DEVICE IN THE WATER 693 00:37:34,018 --> 00:37:34,452 ♪ CAN YOU REACH ME? 694 00:37:34,518 --> 00:37:39,724 NO, YOU CAN'T AHA 695 00:37:39,790 --> 00:37:42,360 ♪ MY CHEEKS IN HIGH COLOUR OVERRIPE PEACHES 696 00:37:42,426 --> 00:37:44,395 ♪ NO SHIRT, NO SHOES ONLY MY FEATURES 697 00:37:44,462 --> 00:37:50,301 ♪ MY BOY BEHIND ME HE'S TAKING PICTURES 698 00:37:50,368 --> 00:37:53,337 ♪ LEAD THE BOYS AND GIRLS ONTO THE BEACHES 699 00:37:53,404 --> 00:37:56,073 ♪ COME ONE, COME ALL I'LL TELL YOU MY SECRETS 700 00:37:56,140 --> 00:38:02,313 ♪ I'M KINDA LIKE A PRETTIER JESUS 701 00:38:02,380 --> 00:38:06,384 ♪ TURN IT ON IN A NEW KIND OF BRIGHT 702 00:38:06,450 --> 00:38:13,124 ♪ IT'S SOLAR SOLAR, SOLAR, SOLAR, SOLAR 703 00:38:13,190 --> 00:38:17,995 ♪ COME ON AND LET THE BLISS BEGIN 704 00:38:18,062 --> 00:38:22,366 ♪ BLINK THREE TIMES WHEN YOU FEEL IT KICKING IN, THAT 705 00:38:22,433 --> 00:38:32,410 ♪ SOLAR-OLAR-OLAR POWER SOLAR-OLAR-OLAR 706 00:38:32,476 --> 00:38:38,282 ♪ SOLAR-OLAR-OLAR POWER SOLAR-OLAR-OLAR 707 00:38:38,349 --> 00:38:50,294 POWER ♪ SOLAR-OLAR-OLAR 708 00:38:50,361 --> 00:38:58,402 POWER ♪ SOLAR-OLAR-OLAR 709 00:38:58,469 --> 00:39:10,381 POWER ♪ SOLAR-OLAR-OLAR 710 00:39:10,448 --> 00:39:22,359 POWER ♪ SOLAR-OLAR-OLAR 711 00:39:22,426 --> 00:39:30,101 POWER ♪ >> Stephen: HER ALBUM, "SOLAR 712 00:39:30,167 --> 00:39:32,937 POWER," COMES OUT AUGUST 20. 713 00:39:33,003 --> 00:39:34,138 LORDE, EVERYBODY! 714 00:39:34,205 --> 00:39:35,306 ( APPLAUSE ) 715 00:39:46,884 --> 00:39:48,319 >> Stephen: THAT'S IT FOR "THE LATE SHOW." 716 00:39:48,385 --> 00:39:49,286 GOOD NIGHT. 717 00:39:54,291 --> 00:39:55,259 ♪♪ >> Stephen: THEY DROVE ALL THE 718 00:39:55,326 --> 00:39:57,628 WAY FROM TEXAS TO WASHINGTON, D.C., CLASSIC FAMILY 719 00:39:57,695 --> 00:39:59,330 ROAD TRIP. 720 00:39:59,396 --> 00:40:02,967 OKAY, EVERYONE GO TO THE BATHROOM BEFORE WE LEFT? 721 00:40:03,033 --> 00:40:03,234 NO? 722 00:40:03,300 --> 00:40:03,901 GOOD. 723 00:40:03,968 --> 00:40:05,336 SAVE IT TO MERE ON THE WALLS. 724 00:40:05,402 --> 00:40:08,572 ( LAUGHTER ) WHY IS THE CAR GOING BACK AND 725 00:40:08,639 --> 00:40:09,340 FORTH SO MUCH? 726 00:40:09,406 --> 00:40:11,909 OH, BECAUSE I'M DRIVING LIKE THIS? 727 00:40:11,976 --> 00:40:15,012 I LEARNED TO DRIVE BY WATCHING A SKETCH COMEDY SHOW.