1 00:00:02,001 --> 00:00:04,237 HOUSE SPEAKER KEVIN McCARTHY IS HANDING OVER 2 00:00:04,237 --> 00:00:09,476 ACCESS TO ALL CAPITOL HILL FOOTAGE FROM THE JANUARY 6TH'S 3 00:00:09,476 --> 00:00:13,847 ATTACK, OF ALL PEOPLE, TUCKER CARLSON AND ONE ON THE MOST 4 00:00:13,847 --> 00:00:17,384 PROMOTE THEORIES ABOUT THE JANUARY 6 INSURRECTION. 5 00:00:17,384 --> 00:00:23,590 HE WILL COME TO READ AND CREATE AN ALTERNATIVE TO JANUAR. 6 00:00:23,590 --> 00:00:25,959 "THE LATE SHOW" HAS GOTTEN TUCKER CARLSON'S ALTERNATIVE 7 00:00:25,959 --> 00:00:28,661 NARRATIVE OF JANUARY 6TH. 8 00:00:28,661 --> 00:00:38,972 ♪ JANUARY 6TH ♪ ♪ LOTS OF FRIENDLY WORDS ♪ 9 00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:43,143 ♪ CHIRPING BIRDS ♪ ♪ ALL OF THE WINDOWS ARE FIXED ♪ 10 00:00:43,143 --> 00:00:48,214 ♪ IT WAS QUITE FUN ♪ ♪ JOSH HAWLEY LIKES TO RUN ♪ 11 00:00:48,214 --> 00:00:58,892 ♪ FOLKS ARE PEACEFULLY PUSHING ALL ACCEPTED FOR ONE ♪ 12 00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:00,894 Announcer: IT'S "THE LATE SHOW WITH STEPHEN COLBERT"! 13 00:01:05,999 --> 00:01:09,769 STEPHEN WELCOMES PINK! 14 00:01:09,769 --> 00:01:16,910 AND JONATHAN MAJORS, FEATURING LEWIS AND "THE LATE SHOW" BAND. 15 00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:20,947 LIVE ON TAPE FROM. 16 00:01:20,947 --> 00:01:26,419 SULLIVAN THEATER IN NEW YORK CITY, IT'S 17 00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:27,654 STEPHEN COLBERT! 18 00:01:27,654 --> 00:01:35,528 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 19 00:01:35,528 --> 00:01:39,032 Stephen: YOU ARE A SIGHT FOR SORE EYES, THANK YOU FOR 20 00:01:39,032 --> 00:01:39,466 BEING HERE! 21 00:01:39,466 --> 00:01:42,802 THANKS SO MUCH! 22 00:01:42,802 --> 00:01:54,113 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] HAPPY TUESDAY! 23 00:01:54,113 --> 00:01:55,748 HEY! 24 00:01:55,748 --> 00:01:56,516 HEY, EVERYBODY! 25 00:01:56,516 --> 00:01:57,417 HELLO! 26 00:01:57,417 --> 00:02:01,888 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] THANK YOU VERY MUCH! 27 00:02:01,888 --> 00:02:05,291 HELLO! 28 00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:05,725 THANK YOU VERY MUCH! 29 00:02:05,725 --> 00:02:07,794 GREAT TIME! 30 00:02:16,002 --> 00:02:16,703 WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW." 31 00:02:16,703 --> 00:02:18,905 I'M STEPHEN COLBERT. 32 00:02:18,905 --> 00:02:22,942 FIRST OF ALL... 33 00:02:22,942 --> 00:02:24,210 HAPPY MARDI GRAS, EVERYBODY! 34 00:02:24,210 --> 00:02:30,950 ALSO KNOWN AS FAT TUESDAY, AND I THINK IT'S TIME WE STOP SHAMING 35 00:02:30,950 --> 00:02:32,952 DAYS OF THE WEEK. 36 00:02:32,952 --> 00:02:34,087 [LAUGHTER] TUESDAY CAN'T HELP IT, IT'S ALL 37 00:02:34,087 --> 00:02:37,223 THOSE TACOS! 38 00:02:37,223 --> 00:02:40,593 AFTER HIS SURPRISE VISIT TO KYIV YESTERDAY, TODAY JOE BIDEN WAS 39 00:02:40,593 --> 00:02:43,596 IN POLAND, WHERE HE GAVE A FIERY SPEECH DEFENDING DEMOCRACY TO 40 00:02:43,596 --> 00:02:48,801 MARK THE ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF PUTIN'S INVASION OF UKRAINE. 41 00:02:48,801 --> 00:02:51,204 OF COURSE, THE TRADITIONAL GIFT FOR THE FIRST ANNIVERSARY IS 42 00:02:51,204 --> 00:02:59,279 PAPER, SO BIDEN GAVE UKRAINE 460 MILLION ONE DOLLAR BILLS. 43 00:02:59,279 --> 00:03:03,249 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] TODAY, PUTIN HIT BACK AT THE 44 00:03:03,249 --> 00:03:07,287 WEST IN RUSSIA'S STATE OF THE UNION SPEECH. 45 00:03:07,287 --> 00:03:12,292 THEIR STATE OF THE UNION SPEECH IS JUST LIKE OURS, EXCEPT THE 46 00:03:12,292 --> 00:03:17,297 SPECIAL GUESTS IN THE BALCONY PLUNGE TO THEIR DEATHS. 47 00:03:17,297 --> 00:03:18,565 [LAUGHTER] THE WORLD WAS WATCHING CLOSELY, 48 00:03:18,565 --> 00:03:25,204 BECAUSE THE SPEECH WAS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR HIM TO PUT THE 49 00:03:25,204 --> 00:03:26,472 BEST SPIN ON HIS DISASTROUS INVASION. 50 00:03:26,472 --> 00:03:27,874 ONE YEAR AGO, PUTIN THOUGHT THE WAR WOULD ONLY LAST A FEW DAYS. 51 00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:32,178 BUT CLEARLY, HE MADE A MISCALCULATION IN THE RATIO OF 52 00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:37,383 [BLEEP] AROUND TO FIND OUT. 53 00:03:37,383 --> 00:03:43,489 [LAUGHTER] [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 54 00:03:43,489 --> 00:03:46,726 PUTIN CLAPPED BACK AT THE WEST BY ANNOUNCING THAT RUSSIA WILL 55 00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:50,563 SUSPEND ITS PARTICIPATION IN THE "NEW START" NUCLEAR ARMS CONTROL 56 00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:53,032 TREATY. 57 00:03:53,032 --> 00:03:57,470 HOWEVER, THE U.S. STATE DEPARTMENT HAD ALREADY 58 00:03:57,470 --> 00:03:59,238 DETERMINED THAT RUSSIA WAS NOT COMPLYING WITH THAT TREATY. 59 00:03:59,238 --> 00:04:02,008 SO THEY'RE GOING TO "OFFICIALLY" BEGIN TO STOP DOING WHAT THEY'VE 60 00:04:02,008 --> 00:04:09,849 PREVIOUSLY ONLY BEEN PRETENDING NOT TO DO. 61 00:04:09,849 --> 00:04:11,084 [LAUGHTER] IT'S LIKE A KID ON HIS 21ST 62 00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:14,787 BIRTHDAY SAYING TO HIS PARENTS, "AND NOW TO FINALLY TRY THIS 63 00:04:14,787 --> 00:04:21,594 "AL-KY-HOL" I'VE HEARD SO MANY TERRIBLE STORIES ABOUT." 64 00:04:21,594 --> 00:04:23,129 IF YOU THINK IT'S SAFE, I WILL. 65 00:04:23,129 --> 00:04:25,431 WE'VE ALSO GOT THREATS TO DEMOCRACY RIGHT HERE AT HOME. 66 00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:28,201 SPECIFICALLY, SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE, AND FIRST SUCCESSFUL 67 00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:35,675 BUTTHOLE TO MOUTH TRANSPLANT, [LAUGHTER] 68 00:04:35,675 --> 00:04:41,848 KEVIN MCCARTHY. 69 00:04:41,848 --> 00:04:44,484 YOU SHOULD HEAR THAT BOY WHISTLE. 70 00:04:44,484 --> 00:04:48,554 [LAUGHTER] LIKE A BIRD, JUST LIKE A BIRD. 71 00:04:48,554 --> 00:04:51,658 YESTERDAY, WE FOUND OUT THAT MCCARTHY HAS GIVEN EXCLUSIVE 72 00:04:51,658 --> 00:04:54,661 ACCESS TO 41,000 HOURS OF CAPITOL SURVEILLANCE FOOTAGE 73 00:04:54,661 --> 00:04:57,964 FROM THE JANUARY 6TH RIOT TO TUCKER CARLSON. 74 00:04:57,964 --> 00:05:02,669 NO! 75 00:05:02,669 --> 00:05:03,670 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 76 00:05:03,670 --> 00:05:05,171 YOU CAN'T GIVE THIS FOOTAGE TO TUCKER CARLSON! 77 00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:06,673 EVER SINCE JANUARY 6TH, HE'S REPEATEDLY DOWNPLAYED THE 78 00:05:06,673 --> 00:05:10,176 VIOLENT ATTACK ON THE CAPITOL AS "VANDALISM" AND "A FORGETTABLY 79 00:05:10,176 --> 00:05:12,145 MINOR OUTBREAK BY RECENT STANDARDS." 80 00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:13,346 YEAH, NO BIGGIE. 81 00:05:13,346 --> 00:05:16,182 I THINK ALL OF US WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER WATCHING IT ON TV AND 82 00:05:16,182 --> 00:05:16,883 THINKING, "THIS IS FORGETTABLE." 83 00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:20,319 PLUS, THIS IS SO IRRESPONSIBLE. 84 00:05:20,319 --> 00:05:24,157 THE FOOTAGE WILL REVEAL SENSITIVE SECURITY INFORMATION, 85 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:27,660 LIKE CONGRESSIONAL ESCAPE ROUTES AND SECURE HOLDING AREAS AND 86 00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:32,131 WHERE THE CAMERAS ARE. 87 00:05:32,131 --> 00:05:36,669 BUT, KEVIN MCCARTHY CLEARLY THOUGHT ALL THIS THROUGH, AND, 88 00:05:36,669 --> 00:05:38,037 AS SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE, HE CALMED HIS WORRIED COLLEAGUES 89 00:05:38,037 --> 00:05:45,078 WITH THIS STATEMENT HE MADE TODAY: 90 00:05:45,078 --> 00:05:47,680 BEST SPEECH I'VE EVER SEEN HIM GIVE. 91 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:54,220 - TUCKER'S PRODUCERS ARE ALREADY - - 92 00:05:54,220 --> 00:05:57,190 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] TUCKER'S PRODUCERS ARE ALREADY 93 00:05:57,190 --> 00:05:59,559 EDITING THE MOUNTAIN OF FOOTAGE FOR SHOWS NEXT WEEK, AND HE 94 00:05:59,559 --> 00:06:02,428 CLAIMS HE'S DETERMINED TO GET TO THE TRUTH, SAYING: "BY 95 00:06:02,428 --> 00:06:04,630 DEFINITION, THIS VIDEO WILL REVEAL IT." 96 00:06:04,630 --> 00:06:05,798 NO. 97 00:06:05,798 --> 00:06:08,868 BY DEFINITION, 41,000 HOURS OF FOOTAGE CAN BE EDITED TO SAY 98 00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:11,437 WHATEVER YOU WANT. 99 00:06:11,437 --> 00:06:13,039 LOOK AT THESE GOOD SAMARITANS REPAIRING THAT WINDOW WITH A 100 00:06:13,039 --> 00:06:15,975 SHIELD! 101 00:06:15,975 --> 00:06:16,809 [LAUGHTER] AND NOW THEY'RE PEACEFULLY 102 00:06:16,809 --> 00:06:21,681 LEAVING THE CAPITOL. 103 00:06:21,681 --> 00:06:31,724 COULD EVEN MAKE THE Q SHAMAN SEEM PEACEFUL: 104 00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:43,603 [SOUND EFFECT] Stephen: BUT HEY, IF HE GETS 105 00:06:43,603 --> 00:06:44,137 TO DO IT. 106 00:06:44,137 --> 00:06:45,371 SO CAN WE. 107 00:06:45,371 --> 00:06:46,405 WHICH IS WHY I TOOK WHAT SEEMED LIKE 41,000 HOURS OF FOX NEWS 108 00:06:46,405 --> 00:06:48,608 FOOTAGE TO REVEAL THE TRUTH ABOUT TUCKER CARLSON: 109 00:06:48,608 --> 00:06:49,108 "GOOD EVENING. 110 00:06:49,108 --> 00:06:49,976 I'M TUCKER CARLSON. 111 00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:50,643 I BEHAVE LIKE A JERK BECAUSE I AM A JERK. 112 00:06:50,643 --> 00:06:51,444 EVERYONE HATES ME. 113 00:06:51,444 --> 00:06:52,278 MY SHOW IS A REAL PROBLEM IN AMERICA. 114 00:06:52,278 --> 00:06:52,945 I AM A RACIST. 115 00:06:52,945 --> 00:06:53,946 I AM A SMALL, BACKWARD HERMIT. 116 00:06:53,946 --> 00:07:02,688 AND I ALSO EAT DOGS. 117 00:07:02,688 --> 00:07:05,758 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Stephen: THE WORST PART OF 118 00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:12,365 THIS IS THAT TUCKER DOESN'T EVEN BELIEVE THE LIES HE'S PEDDLING 119 00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:13,499 ABOUT JANUARY 6TH. 120 00:07:13,499 --> 00:07:14,700 LAST WEEK, WE LEARNED THAT FOX NEWS STARS AND EXECUTIVES 121 00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:17,904 PRIVATELY TRASHED THE FORMER PRESIDENT'S ELECTION FRAUD 122 00:07:17,904 --> 00:07:21,407 CLAIMS. 123 00:07:21,407 --> 00:07:23,609 EVEN THOUGH CALLING THE ELECTION RIGGED WAS FOX'S BREAD AND 124 00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:25,344 BUTTER! 125 00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:27,046 THIS IS LIKE IF I HAD A PRIVATE DIARY THAT SAID, 126 00:07:27,046 --> 00:07:33,352 LORD OF THE RINGS "SUCKS!" "LOL WHAT'S A "BILBO?" 127 00:07:33,352 --> 00:07:41,627 [LAUGHTER] LIKE IF I DID NOT CARE IF 128 00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:42,895 BALROGS HAVE WINGS OR NOT. 129 00:07:42,895 --> 00:07:46,165 IT'S A LONG STORY. 130 00:07:46,165 --> 00:07:47,433 THESE REVELATIONS CAME COURTESY OF DOMINION VOTING SYSTEMS, WHO 131 00:07:47,433 --> 00:07:54,340 FILED A MOTION IN THEIR "$1.6 BILLION DEFAMATION LAWSUIT 132 00:07:54,340 --> 00:07:55,541 AGAINST FOX NEWS FOR FALSELY CLAIMING THEY RIGGED THE 2020 133 00:07:55,541 --> 00:08:01,113 ELECTION." 134 00:08:01,113 --> 00:08:02,081 $1.6 BILLION! 135 00:08:02,081 --> 00:08:03,516 EVEN FOR RUPERT MURDOCH, THAT'S A LOT OF CASH. 136 00:08:03,516 --> 00:08:10,356 HE MIGHT HAVE TO GO ON THE AIR AND SELL REVERSE MORTGAGES. 137 00:08:10,356 --> 00:08:17,663 [LAUGHTER] SOME OF THE MOST DAMAGING TAX 138 00:08:17,663 --> 00:08:18,965 COME FROM A CHAIN BETWEEN TUCKER CARLSON, SEAN HANNITY, AND LAURA 139 00:08:18,965 --> 00:08:20,333 INGRAHAM, IN WHICH THEY REPEATEDLY INSULTED AND MOCKED 140 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:21,601 THE EXPRESIDENT'S ADVISERS, INCLUDING RUDY GIULIANI. 141 00:08:21,601 --> 00:08:22,802 EVEN FOX THINKS HE'S A JOKE. 142 00:08:22,802 --> 00:08:24,203 THAT IS THE MOST EMBARRASSING NEWS ABOUT RUDY TO LEAK SINCE 143 00:08:24,203 --> 00:08:28,975 RUDY LEAKED. 144 00:08:28,975 --> 00:08:32,311 [LAUGHTER] GOT THERE. 145 00:08:32,311 --> 00:08:34,213 OLDIE, BUT A GOODY. 146 00:08:34,213 --> 00:08:39,151 ONE OF THE MAIN SOURCES OF THE THE FORMER PRESIDENT'S LAWYER 147 00:08:39,151 --> 00:08:43,522 AND MOM WHO TOOK AN EDIBLE BEFORE SHE WENT TO SUNGLASS HUT, 148 00:08:43,522 --> 00:08:44,657 SIDNEY POWELL. 149 00:08:44,657 --> 00:08:47,526 IN THE WAKE OF THE 2020 ELECTION, POWELL APPEARED ON FOX 150 00:08:47,526 --> 00:08:50,830 NEWS AND FOX BUSINESS AT LEAST A DOZEN TIMES TO PROMOTE WILD LIES 151 00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:53,165 ABOUT DOMINION VOTING MACHINES. 152 00:08:53,165 --> 00:08:55,768 SO THE NETWORK ASKED FOR HER SOURCE. 153 00:08:55,768 --> 00:08:58,971 AND, SIDNEY POWELL, WHEN PRESSED FOR EVIDENCE, FORWARDED A MEMO 154 00:08:58,971 --> 00:09:01,440 ENTITLED "ELECTION FRAUD INFO." 155 00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:05,678 WE ALL KNOW THE BEST SOURCE OF INFORMATION IS "EMAIL FORWARDS." 156 00:09:05,678 --> 00:09:09,415 THAT'S THE ONLY WAY I LEARNED THE "101 WAYS THAT CATS ARE 157 00:09:09,415 --> 00:09:11,150 BETTER THAN MEN." 158 00:09:11,150 --> 00:09:14,654 THE MEMO WASN'T WRITTEN BY POWELL, BUT HER SOURCE WAS 159 00:09:14,654 --> 00:09:15,855 IMPECCABLE. 160 00:09:15,855 --> 00:09:18,758 THE MEMO'S AUTHOR CLAIMS TO KNOW THAT DOMINION WAS THE COMMON 161 00:09:18,758 --> 00:09:19,959 THREAD IN ALL IRREGULARITIES. 162 00:09:19,959 --> 00:09:21,360 HOW DID SHE DISCOVER THAT? 163 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:24,664 ACCORDING TO HER: SHE GAINS INSIGHTS FROM 164 00:09:24,664 --> 00:09:27,400 EXPERIENCING SOMETHING "LIKE TIME-TRAVEL IN A SEMICONSCIOUS 165 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:33,105 STATE." 166 00:09:33,105 --> 00:09:37,143 [LAUGHTER] OH MY GOD, SHE CAN TIME TRAVEL? 167 00:09:37,143 --> 00:09:38,311 [LAUGHTER] MAYBE SHE CAN FIX ALL OF THIS BY 168 00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:40,846 GOING BACK IN TIME TO STOP BABY RUDY GIULIANI FROM TRYING 169 00:09:40,846 --> 00:09:44,050 MERLOT! 170 00:09:44,050 --> 00:09:50,456 [APPLAUSE] TWO RUDIES. 171 00:09:50,456 --> 00:09:52,625 IT GETS WEIRDER THAN TIME TRAVELING IN A SEMICONSCIOUS 172 00:09:52,625 --> 00:09:53,726 STATE. 173 00:09:53,726 --> 00:09:55,728 THE MEMO'S AUTHOR WRITES, "WHO AM I? 174 00:09:55,728 --> 00:09:57,897 AND HOW DO I KNOW ALL OF THIS? 175 00:09:57,897 --> 00:09:59,498 I'VE HAD THE STRANGEST DREAMS. 176 00:09:59,498 --> 00:10:06,772 I WAS INTERNALLY DECAPITATED, AND YET, I LIVE." 177 00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:09,575 "YOU MAY ASK YOURSELF, HOW DID I GET HERE? 178 00:10:09,575 --> 00:10:13,612 AND YOU MAY TELL YOURSELF, THIS IS NOT MY BEAUTIFUL HOUSE. 179 00:10:13,612 --> 00:10:15,214 YOU MAY SAY TO YOURSELF, THIS IS NOT MY INTERNALLY DECAPITATED 180 00:10:15,214 --> 00:10:20,519 HEAD!" ELSEWHERE IN THIS MEMO-- WHICH 181 00:10:20,519 --> 00:10:24,056 I REMIND YOU IS THE SOLE SOURCE OF SYDNEY POWELL AND FOX NEWS'S 182 00:10:24,056 --> 00:10:30,896 DOMINION VOTING MACHINE LIES, WHICH DIRECTLY LED TO THE ATTACK 183 00:10:30,896 --> 00:10:32,131 ON THE CAPITOL-- THE AUTHOR SAYS, QUOTE, "THE WIND TELLS ME 184 00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:34,800 I'M A GHOST, BUT I DON'T BELIEVE IT." 185 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,103 OF COURSE, YOU CAN'T TRUST THE WIND! 186 00:10:37,103 --> 00:10:40,606 EVERYONE KNOWS THE WIND BLOWS. 187 00:10:40,606 --> 00:10:48,047 YOU CAN'T BELIEVE A THING THE WIND SAYS TILL YOU VERIFY IT 188 00:10:48,047 --> 00:10:52,184 WITH EARTH AND FIRE. 189 00:10:52,184 --> 00:10:56,022 WHEN SIDNEY POWELL FORWARDED THIS MEMO TO FOX BUSINESS ANCHOR 190 00:10:56,022 --> 00:11:00,359 MARIA BARTIROMO, BARTIROMO HAD A VERY LOGICAL REACTION TO GETTING 191 00:11:00,359 --> 00:11:03,863 A PACKET OF INSANE LIES: SHE SHARED IT WITH THE PRESIDENT'S 192 00:11:03,863 --> 00:11:07,867 SON, AND REPLIED GLOWINGLY TO POWELL, "I JUST SPOKE TO ERIC 193 00:11:07,867 --> 00:11:10,703 AND TOLD HIM YOU GAVE VERY IMPORTANT INFO." 194 00:11:10,703 --> 00:11:14,140 "THANKS MARIA TONY-ROMO! 195 00:11:14,140 --> 00:11:16,042 I GOT THE MEMO AND I KNOW IT'S VERY IMPORTANT BECAUSE I CAN 196 00:11:16,042 --> 00:11:19,178 DEFINITELY READ IT! 197 00:11:19,178 --> 00:11:24,450 UNRELATED QUESTION: WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU SWALLOW A PAPERCLIP? 198 00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:26,218 I DON'T FEEL GOOD! 199 00:11:26,218 --> 00:11:31,557 CAN I HAVE A HUG?" WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU 200 00:11:31,557 --> 00:11:35,694 TONIGHT, MY GUESTS ARE PINK AND STAR OF THE NEW "ANTMAN" AND 201 00:11:35,694 --> 00:11:37,930 "CREED" MOVIES, JONATHAN MAJORS. 202 00:11:37,930 --> 00:11:38,998 BUT WHEN WE COME BACK, "MEANWHILE!" 203 00:12:20,005 --> 00:12:21,006 ♪ ♪ Stephen: WELCOME BACK. 204 00:12:21,006 --> 00:12:27,046 GIVE IT UP FOR LOUIS KATO AND "THE LATE SHOW" BAND! 205 00:12:27,046 --> 00:12:33,119 WE HAVE A POWER PACK SHOW, A POWER PACK SHOW TONIGHT, A YOUNG 206 00:12:33,119 --> 00:12:36,989 LADY WHO I HAVE GREAT HOPES FOR IN THE MUSIC INDUSTRY, HER NAME 207 00:12:36,989 --> 00:12:39,658 IS PINK! 208 00:12:39,658 --> 00:12:41,427 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] REAL PROMISE. 209 00:12:41,427 --> 00:12:42,695 SHE HAS REAL PROMISE. 210 00:12:42,695 --> 00:12:49,135 AND THEN COME OF THIS IS MUCH THE COMING MAN HERE, 211 00:12:49,135 --> 00:12:54,140 JONATHAN MAJORS FROM "AND MAN AND THE WASP" AND "CREED III," 212 00:12:54,140 --> 00:12:56,876 RIPPED, SHREDDED, CHARMING, FANTASTIC. 213 00:12:56,876 --> 00:13:00,513 IF YOU WATCH THE SHOW, YOU KNOW THAT I SPEND MY TIME IN THE NEWS 214 00:13:00,513 --> 00:13:04,216 KITCHEN TO FIND THAT A TOPICAL GANDER WITH SAGE AND CELERY SALT 215 00:13:04,216 --> 00:13:09,488 BEFORE LEAVING IT OVER A MAPLE AND PECAN WOOD FIRE HELD AT 216 00:13:09,488 --> 00:13:13,125 220 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT UNTIL I AM READY TO SERVE YOU THE 217 00:13:13,125 --> 00:13:15,628 FLAWLESSLY SMOKED GOOSE THAT IS MY MONOLOGUE, BUT SOMETIMES, 218 00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:18,097 JUST SOMETIMES I CRASH MY GETAWAY ZAMBONI INTO A CULVERT 219 00:13:18,097 --> 00:13:24,069 BY THE PORT AFTER SKIDDING OVER A RABID 220 00:13:24,069 --> 00:13:25,304 SKUNK, DOUSE IT WITH THE HALF-A-CHOLULA PACKET IN MY 221 00:13:25,304 --> 00:13:26,405 PANTS AND SOME PINE NEEDLES TO OFFER YOU THE OUTLAW ROADKILL OF 222 00:13:26,405 --> 00:13:38,117 NEWS THAT IS MY SEGMENT: "MEANWHILE," 223 00:13:38,117 --> 00:13:41,120 NEVER FAILS RIGHT THERE, ETERNAL AND EVERGREEN. 224 00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:42,421 ACCORDING TO A NEW STUDY, SNAKES CAN HEAR YOU 225 00:13:42,421 --> 00:13:42,855 SCREAM. 226 00:13:42,855 --> 00:13:44,123 OH, THAT'S GOOD. 227 00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:46,825 THEY JUST DON'T CARE. 228 00:13:46,825 --> 00:13:48,661 [LAUGHTER] MEANWHILE, WE HERE AT MEANWHILE 229 00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:52,031 INDUSTRIAL SMELTING AND VENDING MACHINE REPAIR SOMETIMES 230 00:13:52,031 --> 00:13:55,467 ENCOUNTER SO MANY DONG-FOCUSED STORIES THAT WE COLLECT THEM ALL 231 00:13:55,467 --> 00:14:03,909 IN OUR MEANWHILE SUB-SEGMENT: PEENWHILE. 232 00:14:03,909 --> 00:14:07,913 PEENWHILE, ARCHAEOLOGISTS HAVE DISCOVERED WHAT THEY BELIEVE TO 233 00:14:07,913 --> 00:14:10,382 BE THE "FIRST ROMAN DILDO." 234 00:14:10,382 --> 00:14:11,417 [LAUGHTER] IT BELONGED TO ROME'S MOST 235 00:14:11,417 --> 00:14:17,489 ICONIC EMPEROR, "JULIUS PLEASE HER" 236 00:14:17,489 --> 00:14:20,759 [LAUGHTER] THANK YOU. 237 00:14:20,759 --> 00:14:25,931 LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE DILDO. 238 00:14:25,931 --> 00:14:28,000 NOW THAT IS SOME MUSEUM QUALITY WOOD. 239 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:30,669 FUN FACT: THAT DILDO WENT ON TO BE USED BY MICKEY MANTLE TO WIN 240 00:14:30,669 --> 00:14:34,940 THE 1956 WORLD SERIES. 241 00:14:34,940 --> 00:14:36,609 APPARENTLY, THE PHALLUS IS 16 CENTIMETERS LONG BUT, 242 00:14:36,609 --> 00:14:42,948 RESEARCHERS SAY, IT WAS PROBABLY LARGER BECAUSE ARCHAEOLOGICAL 243 00:14:42,948 --> 00:14:44,383 WOOD IS PRONE TO SHRINKAGE. 244 00:14:44,383 --> 00:14:49,188 ALSO SPLINTERS. 245 00:14:49,188 --> 00:14:52,958 [LAUGHTER] PEENWHILE, ACCORDING TO A NEW 246 00:14:52,958 --> 00:14:55,060 STUDY, THE AVERAGE PENIS LENGTH HAS INCREASED OVER THE PAST 30 247 00:14:55,060 --> 00:14:56,395 YEARS. 248 00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:57,463 MAKES SENSE. 249 00:14:57,463 --> 00:15:01,900 30 YEARS AGO WAS THE END OF THE COLD WAR. 250 00:15:01,900 --> 00:15:05,337 [LAUGHTER] BEFORE YOU GET TOO EXCITED, YOU 251 00:15:05,337 --> 00:15:06,639 SHOULD KNOW THAT RESEARCHERS FEAR THE PHALLIC INFLATION IS 252 00:15:06,639 --> 00:15:10,342 DUE TO UNHEALTHY HABITS, LIKE BINGING JUNK FOOD. 253 00:15:10,342 --> 00:15:16,782 THEN AMERICANS SHOULD BE THE MOST ENDOWED MEN ON THE PLANET. 254 00:15:16,782 --> 00:15:17,783 [LAUGHTER] WE INVENTED SUPERSIZING. 255 00:15:17,783 --> 00:15:23,522 AND THE BIG GULP. 256 00:15:23,522 --> 00:15:25,691 - MEANWHILE, RESEARCHERS ARE - - 257 00:15:25,691 --> 00:15:35,901 [APPLAUSE] THAT'S WHY WE ARE ON AT 11:35. 258 00:15:35,901 --> 00:15:38,504 MEANWHILE, RESEARCHERS ARE TURNING TAXIDERMIED BIRDS INTO 259 00:15:38,504 --> 00:15:41,273 DRONES, WHICH COULD POTENTIALLY BE A VERY USEFUL ESPIONAGE TOOL 260 00:15:41,273 --> 00:15:44,209 BECAUSE IT WILL LOOK MORE LIKE THE REAL THING AND, HOPEFULLY, 261 00:15:44,209 --> 00:15:45,778 IS MORE INCLINED TO BE IGNORED. 262 00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:48,847 MAYBE IGNORED BY SPY TARGETS, BUT WHAT ABOUT OTHER BIRDS? 263 00:15:48,847 --> 00:15:49,315 "OH MY GOD! 264 00:15:49,315 --> 00:15:50,416 PHIL? 265 00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:52,951 WE THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD, HEY EVERYBODY, PHIL'S BACK! 266 00:15:52,951 --> 00:15:57,189 PHIL? 267 00:15:57,189 --> 00:15:57,690 IT'S ME MARY! 268 00:15:57,690 --> 00:15:58,557 I LOVE YOU PHIL. 269 00:15:58,557 --> 00:16:05,264 DON'T YOU RECOGNIZE THE KIDS?" [LAUGHTER] 270 00:16:05,264 --> 00:16:10,969 GOT KIND OF DARK THERE AT THE END, DIDN'T IT? 271 00:16:10,969 --> 00:16:12,171 11:35. 272 00:16:12,171 --> 00:16:13,305 MEANWHILE, A POWER OUTAGE AT KENNEDY AIRPORT LAST WEEK FORCED 273 00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:15,240 A NEW ZEALAND-TO-NEW YORK FLIGHT TO TURN AROUND, CAUSING 274 00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:18,077 PASSENGERS TO SPEND "16-PLUS HOURS IN THE AIR ONLY 275 00:16:18,077 --> 00:16:22,181 TO LAND RIGHT BACK WHERE THEY STARTED." 276 00:16:22,181 --> 00:16:25,851 THERE HASN'T BEEN AN AIR TRAVEL HORROR STORY LIKE THAT SINCE 277 00:16:25,851 --> 00:16:29,388 WHATEVER SPIRIT IS DOING RIGHT NOW. 278 00:16:29,388 --> 00:16:30,456 [LAUGHTER] WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH PINK. 279 00:16:55,013 --> 00:16:56,448 Stephen: WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY. 280 00:16:56,448 --> 00:17:03,889 YOU KNOW MY FIRST GUEST AS A THREE-TIME GRAMMY AWARD-WINNING 281 00:17:03,889 --> 00:17:07,226 MUSICIAN WHO HAS SOLD OVER 135 MILLION RECORDS WORLDWIDE AND 282 00:17:07,226 --> 00:17:10,396 WHOSE HITS INCLUDE "RAISE YOUR GLASS," "JUST GIVE ME A REASON," 283 00:17:10,396 --> 00:17:12,898 AND "WHAT ABOUT US." 284 00:17:12,898 --> 00:17:18,404 PLEASE WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW," PINK. 285 00:17:18,404 --> 00:17:31,150 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 286 00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:33,652 Pink: HI! 287 00:17:33,652 --> 00:17:45,931 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 288 00:17:45,931 --> 00:17:48,934 Stephen: IT IS REALLY LOVELY TO MEET YOU FOR THE FIRST 289 00:17:48,934 --> 00:17:51,303 I AM SO HAPPY TO BE HERE. 290 00:17:51,303 --> 00:17:52,504 I LOVE YOU. 291 00:17:52,504 --> 00:17:55,841 I WANT TO CLONE YOU 50, 60, 70 TIMES, WE NEED MORE OF YOU IN 292 00:17:55,841 --> 00:17:58,010 THE WORLD. 293 00:17:58,010 --> 00:17:59,244 Stephen: THAT IS LOVELY TO SAY. 294 00:17:59,244 --> 00:18:03,115 WE NEED MORE OF YOU TOO, I WAS AT THE GRAMMYS IN 2009, I THINK 295 00:18:03,115 --> 00:18:12,024 AND YOU DID LIKE A SILK-- WHAT ARE THOSE CALLED? 296 00:18:12,024 --> 00:18:16,695 Pink: THEY CHANGE THE DRESS CODE AFTER THAT. 297 00:18:16,695 --> 00:18:17,830 Stephen: BECAUSE YOU WEREN'T WEARING ENOUGH? 298 00:18:17,830 --> 00:18:19,898 Pink: A WHOLE LOT OF BUTT. 299 00:18:19,898 --> 00:18:23,435 Stephen: REALLY, I REMEMBER IT BEING A FINE PERFORMANCE. 300 00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:26,605 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DOING ALL OF THAT, NONE OF IT IS AUDIO TRACK, 301 00:18:26,605 --> 00:18:29,675 YOU ARE SINGING WITH ALL OF THAT PHYSICALITY. 302 00:18:29,675 --> 00:18:32,845 Pink: YES, I STARTED AS A GYMNAST, AND HAD REALLY BAD 303 00:18:32,845 --> 00:18:37,316 ASTHMA AS A KID, SO HAD TO DO A LOT OF DIAPHRAGMATIC BREATHING 304 00:18:37,316 --> 00:18:41,053 AS PRACTICE TO SURVIVE, AND WORKED OUT FOR ME. 305 00:18:41,053 --> 00:18:45,624 Stephen: I MEAN, HERE YOU ARE, HERE ARE SOME OF THE WORK. 306 00:18:45,624 --> 00:18:48,927 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] WE CAN SEE THAT. 307 00:18:48,927 --> 00:18:51,430 LOOK AT THAT! 308 00:18:51,430 --> 00:18:53,265 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] IS IT DANGEROUS? 309 00:18:53,265 --> 00:18:56,802 Pink: YEAH. 310 00:18:56,802 --> 00:18:58,770 Stephen: IT LOOKS DANGEROUS. 311 00:18:58,770 --> 00:19:01,073 Pink: I WAS PREGNANT IN THAT PICTURE. 312 00:19:01,073 --> 00:19:04,643 I HAD A BABY IN MY BELLY. 313 00:19:04,643 --> 00:19:07,145 Stephen: WELL, I AM IMPRESSED. 314 00:19:07,145 --> 00:19:08,113 Pink: THINKS. 315 00:19:08,113 --> 00:19:12,417 Stephen: YOU JUST RELEASED YOUR NEW ALBUM. 316 00:19:12,417 --> 00:19:14,753 Pink: "TRUSTFALL." 317 00:19:14,753 --> 00:19:17,756 Stephen: YOUR NINTH ALBUM, "TRUSTFALL" RIGHT THERE. 318 00:19:17,756 --> 00:19:21,827 TELL ME-- WHAT DOES "TRUSTFALL" MEAN? 319 00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:25,197 Pink: OH, LORD, "TRUSTFALL" I FEEL LIKE ALL OF US ARE 320 00:19:25,197 --> 00:19:28,867 WALKING AROUND SORT OF WITH THIS LOW-LEVEL TRAUMA AND OUR BODIES, 321 00:19:28,867 --> 00:19:32,404 AND IT TAKES A LOT OF TRUST TO BE A HUMAN BEING THESE DAYS, TO 322 00:19:32,404 --> 00:19:35,407 GET OUT OF BED IN THE MORNING, GO TO WORK AND DROP YOUR KIDS 323 00:19:35,407 --> 00:19:39,678 OFF AT SCHOOL AND GO TO PUBLIC PLACES AND PARTICIPATE IN 324 00:19:39,678 --> 00:19:44,850 ELECTIONS AND HAVE A VAGINA. 325 00:19:44,850 --> 00:19:46,585 IT JUST TAKES A LOT OF TRUST. 326 00:19:46,585 --> 00:19:50,656 AND I KNOW A LOT OF TEENAGERS ALSO, AND I JUST THINK A LOT OF 327 00:19:50,656 --> 00:19:54,660 PEOPLE HAVE ANXIETY, A LOT OF KIDS HANG HAVE ANXIETY, AND ALL 328 00:19:54,660 --> 00:19:57,963 OF US FEEL LIKE WE ARE FALLING BACKWARDS AND WE DON'T KNOW 329 00:19:57,963 --> 00:19:59,231 WHERE THE GROUND IS. 330 00:19:59,231 --> 00:20:00,465 AND THAT'S A TRUST FALL. 331 00:20:00,465 --> 00:20:03,235 AND I PUT A LOT OF FAITH IN THE UNIVERSE AND THE PEOPLE AROUND 332 00:20:03,235 --> 00:20:04,469 ME, AND MYSELF. 333 00:20:04,469 --> 00:20:08,607 YOU HAVE TO ASK YOURSELF, WHAT IS WORTH FALLING FOR, AND WHO IS 334 00:20:08,607 --> 00:20:12,177 SUPPOSED TO CATCH YOU, OR DO YOU CATCH YOURSELF? 335 00:20:12,177 --> 00:20:15,013 A LOT OF QUESTIONS. 336 00:20:15,013 --> 00:20:17,049 Stephen: ONE OF THE HARDEST THINGS TO LEARN, AND IT TOOK ME 337 00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:20,252 A LONG TIME TO LEARN AND IF THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH WHAT 338 00:20:20,252 --> 00:20:28,260 YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT IS THAT IT TAKES TIME TO LEARN THAT-- IT 339 00:20:28,260 --> 00:20:31,897 ISN'T EASIER TO LIVE IN TRUST AND VITALITY AS OPPOSED TO FEAR 340 00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:34,633 AND MORBIDITY, IT'S JUST BETTER. 341 00:20:34,633 --> 00:20:38,503 IT'S JUST AS HARD, BUT IT IS ACTUALLY WITH THE BETTER 342 00:20:38,503 --> 00:20:38,971 OUTCOME. 343 00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:40,038 Pink: I AGREE. 344 00:20:40,038 --> 00:20:41,974 Stephen: AND IT'S HARD TO KNOW UNTIL YOU MAKE THAT 345 00:20:41,974 --> 00:20:43,108 DECISION. 346 00:20:43,108 --> 00:20:45,811 Pink: I DON'T BELIEVE IN FEARLESSNESS, THAT'S JUST A 347 00:20:45,811 --> 00:20:48,447 CATCHPHRASE, I BELIEVE THEM REAL FEAR AND NOT LETTING IT DIVERT 348 00:20:48,447 --> 00:20:50,916 YOU OR MAKE YOUR CHOICES FOR YOU. 349 00:20:50,916 --> 00:20:54,920 Stephen: THAT IS WHY COURAGE IS A VIRTUE. 350 00:20:54,920 --> 00:21:00,993 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] SO YOU HAVE INCREDIBLE 351 00:21:00,993 --> 00:21:01,860 COLLABORATORS ON THIS, CHRIS STAPLETON-- 352 00:21:01,860 --> 00:21:02,661 HOW DID YOU PUT TOGETHER THIS GROUP? 353 00:21:02,661 --> 00:21:04,196 Pink: STILL LUCKY. 354 00:21:04,196 --> 00:21:05,097 I HAVE NO IDEA. 355 00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:11,103 IT SOUNDS DUMB, BUT I JUST CALLED THEM UP. 356 00:21:11,103 --> 00:21:13,905 [LAUGHTER] I AM A FAN, I AM A FAN. 357 00:21:13,905 --> 00:21:15,374 I LOVE THE LUMINAIRES. 358 00:21:15,374 --> 00:21:16,008 I LOVE FIRST AID KIT. 359 00:21:16,008 --> 00:21:19,211 I LOVE CHRIS STAPLETON. 360 00:21:19,211 --> 00:21:22,314 WHEN HE DID THE NATIONAL ANTHEM, I WANTED TO REACH THROUGH THE TV 361 00:21:22,314 --> 00:21:24,750 AND JUST SMACK THEM ACROSS THE FACE. 362 00:21:24,750 --> 00:21:25,751 Stephen: BECAUSE IT WAS TOO GOOD. 363 00:21:25,751 --> 00:21:28,053 Pink: IT WAS TOO GOOD. 364 00:21:28,053 --> 00:21:29,021 Stephen: THAT'S RIGHT. 365 00:21:29,021 --> 00:21:31,990 Pink: HE IS THE MOST HUMBLE GUYIN THE ROOM. 366 00:21:31,990 --> 00:21:33,959 HE IS LIKE IS THAT WHAT YOU WANTED? 367 00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:35,661 YOU WANT ME TO DO IT AGAIN. 368 00:21:35,661 --> 00:21:39,598 I'M LIKE YEAH, CHRIS, THAT WAS WHAT I WANTED. 369 00:21:39,598 --> 00:21:40,666 YOU CAN GO NOW. 370 00:21:40,666 --> 00:21:44,169 ALSO, I NEED TO A BLANKET. 371 00:21:44,169 --> 00:21:47,639 Stephen: NOW, YOUR KID SAYING ON THE ALBUM, DID THEY 372 00:21:47,639 --> 00:21:48,440 NOT? 373 00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:49,675 Pink: YES. 374 00:21:49,675 --> 00:21:51,476 Stephen: IS THAT SOMETHING YOU ARE ENCOURAGING, DO YOU WANT 375 00:21:51,476 --> 00:21:53,512 THEM TO BE IN THE MUSIC BUSINESS? 376 00:21:53,512 --> 00:21:55,981 Pink: THEY ARE ALWAYS WITH ME, THEY WILL EITHER SING OR BE 377 00:21:55,981 --> 00:21:57,649 ON THEIR iPAD. 378 00:21:57,649 --> 00:22:00,018 BUT THEY DON'T WANT TO. 379 00:22:00,018 --> 00:22:04,389 IF YOU HEARD JAMISON AT THE END OF NEVER GOING TO-- 380 00:22:04,389 --> 00:22:13,532 YOU WOULD HEAR-- AGAIN, I'M LIKE YOU ARE KILLING IT, BUDDY! 381 00:22:13,532 --> 00:22:16,435 BUT NO, THEY ASK WILLOW, OH, BECAUSE SHE HAS A BEAUTIFUL 382 00:22:16,435 --> 00:22:17,936 VOICE. 383 00:22:17,936 --> 00:22:21,373 AND SHE IS LIKE OH, GOD NO. 384 00:22:21,373 --> 00:22:22,774 I DON'T WANT TO BE A SINGER. 385 00:22:22,774 --> 00:22:26,378 AND I'M LIKE WHY CAN'T YOU ANSWER IT LIKE THAT? 386 00:22:26,378 --> 00:22:30,348 I WOULD LOVE HER TO BE A LAWYER FOR THE ACLU, I BELIEVE SHE 387 00:22:30,348 --> 00:22:32,417 COULD PASS THE BAR EXAM NEXT WEEK. 388 00:22:32,417 --> 00:22:33,852 Pink: SHE IS NINE? 389 00:22:33,852 --> 00:22:35,987 Stephen: SHE IS 11. 390 00:22:35,987 --> 00:22:37,222 SHE IS ALWAYS RIGHT. 391 00:22:37,222 --> 00:22:44,429 AND I AM LIKE, THAT IS NOT THE POINT, I AM IN CHARGE, I THINK. 392 00:22:44,429 --> 00:22:47,599 Stephen: A LAWYER, YOU WOULD BE A GOOD JUDGE. 393 00:22:47,599 --> 00:22:50,969 Pink: I WANT HER TO CHANGE THE WORLD AND ALSO BAIL OUT HER 394 00:22:50,969 --> 00:22:56,141 MOTHER WHO MIGHT BE A D.J. AND VEGAS. 395 00:22:56,141 --> 00:22:58,343 [LAUGHTER] James: WE HAVE TO TAKE A 396 00:22:58,343 --> 00:23:03,148 QUICK BREAK, WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE PINK, EVERYBODY. 397 00:23:03,148 --> 00:23:03,815 STICK AROUND. 398 00:23:03,815 --> 00:23:04,049 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 399 00:23:17,996 --> 00:23:21,566 Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY, WE ARE BACK WITH THE ARTIST BEHIND 400 00:23:21,566 --> 00:23:22,400 THE NEW ALBUM "TRUSTFALL"! 401 00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:27,405 YOU KNOW HER, YOU LOVE HER, IT'S PINK! 402 00:23:27,405 --> 00:23:31,143 YOU HAD SUCCESS FOR SO LONG, YOUR DEBUT ALBUM IN 2,000 AND AT 403 00:23:31,143 --> 00:23:34,613 DOUBLE PLATINUM IF I AM NOT MISTAKEN, AND YOU HAVE HAD 404 00:23:34,613 --> 00:23:40,552 CONTINUING ACCESS SINCE THEN, WHAT-- WHAT IS YOUR OPINION OF 405 00:23:40,552 --> 00:23:42,988 THE MUSIC INDUSTRY HAVE AFTER HAVING BEEN IN IT FOR A COUPLE 406 00:23:42,988 --> 00:23:46,358 OF DECADES, DO YOU HAVE THOUGHTS ON-- 407 00:23:46,358 --> 00:23:49,194 THAT OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE STARTING OUT IN THE INDUSTRY 408 00:23:49,194 --> 00:23:51,863 COME SOME WISDOM YOU CAN APART? 409 00:23:51,863 --> 00:23:54,766 Pink: I HATE PEOPLE THAT GIVE ADVICE. 410 00:23:54,766 --> 00:23:57,135 Stephen: HOW ABOUT JUST EXPERIENCE? 411 00:23:57,135 --> 00:23:59,671 Pink: THAT IS REALLY HARD, BECAUSE I GOT A RECORD DEAL WHEN 412 00:23:59,671 --> 00:24:04,609 I WAS 16, IT WAS 1996, AND THE BUSINESS WAS COMPLETELY 413 00:24:04,609 --> 00:24:05,277 DIFFERENT. 414 00:24:05,277 --> 00:24:06,611 THERE WAS ARTIST DEVELOPMENT. 415 00:24:06,611 --> 00:24:09,848 THERE WERE RECORD LABELS, RECORD COMPANIES WERE A PLACE, NOT JUST 416 00:24:09,848 --> 00:24:11,183 AN IDEA. 417 00:24:11,183 --> 00:24:14,686 AND I ALSO HAD THE BENEFIT OF NOT HAVING A RECORD COME OUT FOR 418 00:24:14,686 --> 00:24:15,620 FOUR YEARS. 419 00:24:15,620 --> 00:24:18,190 AND DID NOT PUT A RECORD OUT UNTIL I WAS 20. 420 00:24:18,190 --> 00:24:22,561 SO I SIGNED IN A GROUP, WE MADE AN ENTIRE RECORD, ONE SHOWCASE, 421 00:24:22,561 --> 00:24:27,165 WE WERE ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE, THE GROUP GOT SHELVED, VERY LONG 422 00:24:27,165 --> 00:24:30,168 STORY, BUT I THEN RENEGOTIATED MY OWN NEW CONTRACT AT 17 FOR AN 423 00:24:30,168 --> 00:24:34,172 OUTFIT FROM BB. 424 00:24:34,172 --> 00:24:38,109 Stephen: THAT IS WHAT YOU GOT, ONE OUTFIT. 425 00:24:38,109 --> 00:24:38,977 Pink: I REALLY WANTED THAT OUTFIT. 426 00:24:38,977 --> 00:24:41,513 Stephen: DO YOU STILL HAVE IT? 427 00:24:41,513 --> 00:24:44,049 Pink: NO, BUT IT WAS LIKE A VELVET CATSUIT. 428 00:24:44,049 --> 00:24:47,586 Stephen: OF COURSE, TOTALLY WORTH IT. 429 00:24:47,586 --> 00:24:50,155 Pink: THE BUSINESS IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT, HOW IT IS NOW 430 00:24:50,155 --> 00:24:53,325 IT IS REALLY COOL THAT THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT CAN GO A 431 00:24:53,325 --> 00:24:55,427 LOT OF DIFFERENT WAYS, THERE IS NO FORMULA. 432 00:24:55,427 --> 00:24:57,462 I THINK IT IS REALLY INTERESTING THE WAY THAT PEOPLE ARE COMING 433 00:24:57,462 --> 00:24:59,664 AT THINGS. 434 00:24:59,664 --> 00:25:02,500 Stephen: BECAUSE THEY CAN DO IT FOR THEMSELVES? 435 00:25:02,500 --> 00:25:05,871 Pink: BECAUSE THEY CAN DO IT FOR THEMSELVES, IT DOES NOT 436 00:25:05,871 --> 00:25:07,806 HAVE TO BE IN A FORMULA WAY. 437 00:25:07,806 --> 00:25:11,843 BUT WHAT I DID WAS OKAY, I AM OBVIOUSLY NOT GOING TO BE THE 438 00:25:11,843 --> 00:25:12,611 POPULAR ONE. 439 00:25:12,611 --> 00:25:13,712 I'M NOT GOING TO BE THE PRETTY ONE. 440 00:25:13,712 --> 00:25:20,151 I'M NOT GOING TO SELL PERFUME, SO, I MEAN, I AM FUNNY. 441 00:25:20,151 --> 00:25:22,587 [LAUGHTER] Stephen: YOU DO NOT HAVE A 442 00:25:22,587 --> 00:25:23,154 SCENT? 443 00:25:23,154 --> 00:25:24,222 DO YOU NOT HAVE A SCENT? 444 00:25:24,222 --> 00:25:26,358 Pink: I DO NOT HAVE A SCENT. 445 00:25:26,358 --> 00:25:28,927 Stephen: WE NEED TO CHANGE THAT. 446 00:25:28,927 --> 00:25:30,095 I WOULD BUY YOUR PERFUME. 447 00:25:30,095 --> 00:25:34,366 Pink: IT WOULD BE LIKE GLITTER AND SMELLED LIKE SADNESS 448 00:25:34,366 --> 00:25:35,233 AND REGRET. 449 00:25:35,233 --> 00:25:36,768 [LAUGHTER] Stephen: SADNESS AND REGRET 450 00:25:36,768 --> 00:25:37,435 BY PINK. 451 00:25:37,435 --> 00:25:38,937 IT WOULD SELL LIKE HOT CAKES. 452 00:25:38,937 --> 00:25:40,805 I'M TELLING YOU. 453 00:25:40,805 --> 00:25:45,744 WHAT ARE YOU PERFORMING FOR US TONIGHT? 454 00:25:45,744 --> 00:25:51,583 Pink: "WHEN I GET THERE." 455 00:25:51,583 --> 00:25:55,520 Stephen: WHY IS THIS A SONG YOU COULD NOT HAVE WRITTEN? 456 00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:58,556 Pink: BECAUSE LOSING A PARENT IS SOMETHING YOU CAN'T 457 00:25:58,556 --> 00:26:02,193 IT-- IT' LIKE WHEN YOU TELL PEOPLE, LIKE WHEN YOU HAVE A 458 00:26:02,193 --> 00:26:05,430 CHILD, OR IF YOU HAVE A CHILD, IT JUST GOES BY SO FAST, NOBODY 459 00:26:05,430 --> 00:26:07,999 KNOWS WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU HAVE DONE IT. 460 00:26:07,999 --> 00:26:11,369 WHEN YOU LOSE A PARENT, IT FEELS LIKE A SUITCASE YOU WILL BE 461 00:26:11,369 --> 00:26:15,373 UNPACKING FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, AND I HAVE NOT PULLED MINE 462 00:26:15,373 --> 00:26:16,474 OUT FROM UNDER THE BED. 463 00:26:16,474 --> 00:26:19,911 Stephen: AM SORRY, WHAT PARENT DID YOU LOSE? 464 00:26:19,911 --> 00:26:22,547 Pink: MY FATHER. 465 00:26:22,547 --> 00:26:24,015 AUGUST OF ' 21. 466 00:26:24,015 --> 00:26:25,016 Stephen: AND RECENT. 467 00:26:25,016 --> 00:26:27,786 Pink: THE SONG WAS A GIFT FOR ME. 468 00:26:27,786 --> 00:26:31,856 I WAS SO RELIEVED FOR HIM, HE WAS FINALLY OUT OF PAIN, HE HAD 469 00:26:31,856 --> 00:26:37,028 CHRONPAIN ALL OF HIS LIFE AND HD CANCER FOR EIGHT YEARS AND I WAS 470 00:26:37,028 --> 00:26:40,131 JUST RELIEVED FOR HIM. 471 00:26:40,131 --> 00:26:43,969 HE HAD A REALLY INTERESTING DECK OF CARDS DEALT AND I ASKED WHAT 472 00:26:43,969 --> 00:26:48,940 HE WANTED TO COME BACK AS, AND HE SAID, WELL, I'M A PILOT, 473 00:26:48,940 --> 00:26:51,977 HONEY, SO MAY BE A BIRD OF FLIGHT. 474 00:26:51,977 --> 00:26:53,411 MAYBE A CANNIBAL CHIPMUNK. 475 00:26:53,411 --> 00:26:55,280 [LAUGHTER] AND I WAS LIKE I THINK THAT'S 476 00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:58,016 THE MORPHINE TALKING. 477 00:26:58,016 --> 00:27:01,619 [LAUGHTER] AND THEN I WENT CAMPING AND 478 00:27:01,619 --> 00:27:06,358 THERE WAS A CHIPMUNK AND I WAS LIKE YOU GUYS DON'T GO NEAR THE 479 00:27:06,358 --> 00:27:07,525 CHIPMUNK. 480 00:27:07,525 --> 00:27:10,595 Stephen: THE NEW ALBUM IS "TRUSTFALL," AND STICK AROUND 481 00:27:10,595 --> 00:27:11,496 FOR A PERFORMANCE BY PINK! 482 00:27:11,496 --> 00:27:13,898 WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH STAR OF 483 00:27:13,898 --> 00:27:14,966 THE NEW "ANTMAN" AND "CREED" MOVIES, JONATHAN MAJORS. 484 00:27:36,988 --> 00:27:37,922 ♪ ♪ Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY, 485 00:27:37,922 --> 00:27:38,757 WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW"! 486 00:27:38,757 --> 00:27:42,927 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. 487 00:27:42,927 --> 00:27:46,931 MY NEXT GUEST STARS AS THE NEW VILLAIN OF THE MARVEL CINEMATIC 488 00:27:46,931 --> 00:27:49,267 UNIVERSE IN "ANT-MAN AND THE WASP: QUANTUMANIA." 489 00:27:49,267 --> 00:27:51,736 YOU'LL ALSO SEE HIM NEXT MONTH OPPOSITE MICHAEL B. 490 00:27:51,736 --> 00:27:54,939 JORDAN IN "CREED III." 491 00:27:54,939 --> 00:28:03,148 PLEASE WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW," JONATHAN MAJORS! 492 00:28:03,148 --> 00:28:18,129 ♪ ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 493 00:28:18,129 --> 00:28:26,905 Stephen: WOO! 494 00:28:26,905 --> 00:28:27,906 HAPPY MARDI GRAS. 495 00:28:27,906 --> 00:28:28,973 Jonathan: IT'S VERY EXCITING. 496 00:28:28,973 --> 00:28:31,509 Stephen: NICE TO HAVE YOU ON HERE. 497 00:28:31,509 --> 00:28:33,244 Jonathan: PLEASURE TO BE HERE. 498 00:28:33,244 --> 00:28:39,017 Stephen: I AM A FAN "THE HARDER THEY FALL" FANTASTIC 499 00:28:39,017 --> 00:28:40,151 PERFORMANCE. 500 00:28:40,151 --> 00:28:43,922 I LOVED YOU AS HE WHO REMAINS, REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO 501 00:28:43,922 --> 00:28:45,423 "CREED III" AND "ANT-MAN AND THE WASP: QUANTUMANIA" WHICH I HAVE 502 00:28:45,423 --> 00:28:47,058 NOT SEEN THE END. 503 00:28:47,058 --> 00:28:49,227 LET'S GET TO SOMETHING REALLY IMPORTANT HERE. 504 00:28:49,227 --> 00:28:52,564 YOU BROUGHT YOUR OWN MUG OUT, WE HAVE THIS MUG FOR YOU, AND YOU 505 00:28:52,564 --> 00:28:53,865 BROUGHT YOUR OWN. 506 00:28:53,865 --> 00:28:55,333 IT'S VERY INTERESTING, I LIKE IT. 507 00:28:55,333 --> 00:28:58,903 BUT I AM NOT THE FIRST PERSON TO WONDER ABOUT THIS. 508 00:28:58,903 --> 00:29:03,741 HERE'S AN ARTICLE IN "GQ" MAGAZINE, WHY IS JONATHAN MAJORS 509 00:29:03,741 --> 00:29:05,910 ALWAYS CARRYING AROUND A LITTLE CUP? 510 00:29:05,910 --> 00:29:09,247 BECAUSE THAT'S NOT JUST TONIGHT, YOU ALWAYS HAVE THE LITTLE CUP. 511 00:29:09,247 --> 00:29:10,882 IS IT ALWAYS A SANE? 512 00:29:10,882 --> 00:29:14,552 Jonathan: THERE ABOUT FOUR IN ROTATION. 513 00:29:14,552 --> 00:29:15,920 Stephen: VARIATIONS ON THE THING. 514 00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:18,656 Jonathan: THREE HAVE HANDLES, ONE DOES NOT. 515 00:29:18,656 --> 00:29:22,327 I'VE BEEN DOING THIS, I AM 33 YEARS OLD, I'VE BEEN DOING IT 516 00:29:22,327 --> 00:29:26,898 SINCE I LEFT MY MOTHER'S HOUSE WHEN I WAS 18. 517 00:29:26,898 --> 00:29:28,666 Stephen: DID SHE GIVE YOU A CUP? 518 00:29:28,666 --> 00:29:31,503 Jonathan: SHE DID NOT GIVE ME A CUP, IT WAS A WORD OF 519 00:29:31,503 --> 00:29:34,305 ADVICE, SHE WAS SO TERRIFIED OF THE CIRCUS THAT I ADJOINED. 520 00:29:34,305 --> 00:29:35,607 Stephen: SHOWBIZ. 521 00:29:35,607 --> 00:29:38,409 AND THE CIRCUS. 522 00:29:38,409 --> 00:29:39,844 Jonathan: YOU HAVE NOT HEARD ABOUT THIS? 523 00:29:39,844 --> 00:29:41,779 Stephen: WERE YOU IN THE CIRCUS? 524 00:29:41,779 --> 00:29:44,649 Jonathan: NO. 525 00:29:44,649 --> 00:29:50,288 NO, SHE WAS VERY CLEAR, SHE WAS VERY CLEAR ABOUT SAFETY. 526 00:29:50,288 --> 00:29:55,260 SHE WOULD SAY NO DRINKING, NO DRUGS, NO SEX, EVERY TIME I LEFT 527 00:29:55,260 --> 00:29:58,062 THE HOUSE. 528 00:29:58,062 --> 00:30:02,167 GETTING ON THE PLANE TO COLLEGE, I'D HAD TO SAY NO DRINKING, NO 529 00:30:02,167 --> 00:30:05,537 DRUGS, NO SEX, BEFORE I GOT THROUGH SECURITY. 530 00:30:05,537 --> 00:30:09,674 SHE SAID, BABY, WATCH YOUR CUP, WATCH OR GLASS. 531 00:30:09,674 --> 00:30:13,144 AND I KEPT TO THAT IN MIND, AND COMING OUT FOR SAFETY, BUT WHAT 532 00:30:13,144 --> 00:30:14,979 THAT MEANT. 533 00:30:14,979 --> 00:30:17,715 Stephen: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 534 00:30:17,715 --> 00:30:21,252 Jonathan: NOW IT MEANS MIND YOUR CUP, YOU ARE A VESSEL, 535 00:30:21,252 --> 00:30:25,123 NOBODY CAN FILL YOU UP, NOBODY CAN POUR YOU OUT, YOU DO THAT 536 00:30:25,123 --> 00:30:26,191 YOURSELF. 537 00:30:26,191 --> 00:30:29,727 SO HOLDING ONTO THIS AS A REMINDER THAT EVEN IN THIS 538 00:30:29,727 --> 00:30:32,497 CRAZINESS HAPPENING, YOU KNOW, MY SELF-ESTEEM IS MY 539 00:30:32,497 --> 00:30:33,731 SELF-ESTEEM. 540 00:30:33,731 --> 00:30:36,801 NOBODY CAN MAKE ME, NOBODY CAN PICK ME UP AS IT WERE OR TEAR ME 541 00:30:36,801 --> 00:30:39,103 DOWN. 542 00:30:39,103 --> 00:30:43,241 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Stephen: I LIKE IT. 543 00:30:43,241 --> 00:30:51,382 OKAY, SO YOU BECAME THE NEW SUPER BILLION OF MCU, IN 544 00:30:51,382 --> 00:30:53,284 "ANT-MAN AND THE WASP: QUANTUMANIA," AND THERE IS 545 00:30:53,284 --> 00:30:57,555 A FIGURINE OF VIEW THAT HAS BEEN MADE AS CAIN, AND MY 546 00:30:57,555 --> 00:31:00,925 UNDERSTANDING IS YOU HAVE NOT SEEN YOUR FIGURINE YET. 547 00:31:00,925 --> 00:31:07,498 Jonathan: NO. 548 00:31:07,498 --> 00:31:13,338 Stephen: HOLD ON, SO IT IS BEHIND THIS CARD RIGHT HERE. 549 00:31:13,338 --> 00:31:17,475 SO READY? 550 00:31:17,475 --> 00:31:20,011 Jonathan: READY! 551 00:31:20,011 --> 00:31:27,385 [LAUGHS] [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 552 00:31:27,385 --> 00:31:28,286 WOW. 553 00:31:28,286 --> 00:31:30,855 Stephen: WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOURSELF? 554 00:31:30,855 --> 00:31:33,391 Jonathan: WOW! 555 00:31:33,391 --> 00:31:37,262 Stephen: WOULD YOU HAVE PLAYED WITH YOU? 556 00:31:37,262 --> 00:31:41,899 [LAUGHTER] 557 00:31:41,899 --> 00:31:43,935 YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. 558 00:31:43,935 --> 00:31:46,037 Jonathan: YES, I ABSOLUTELY WOULD GET THIS GUY. 559 00:31:46,037 --> 00:31:48,940 I WOULD BE IN TOYS 'R' US LIKE HEY, MOM, HOW MANY YARDS DO I 560 00:31:48,940 --> 00:31:52,644 HAVE TO CUT TO GET THIS GUY? 561 00:31:52,644 --> 00:31:56,447 Stephen: THAT IS A SIGNIFICANT MOMENT IN AMERICAN 562 00:31:56,447 --> 00:31:57,015 CULTURE, YOU ARE A TOY! 563 00:31:57,015 --> 00:31:59,317 Jonathan: I AM A TOY. 564 00:31:59,317 --> 00:32:00,852 YES, IT'S COOL. 565 00:32:00,852 --> 00:32:07,325 THE BICEPS ARE A LITTLE-- [LAUGHTER] 566 00:32:07,325 --> 00:32:08,126 Stephen: A LITTLE THIN. 567 00:32:08,126 --> 00:32:09,294 THEY ARE A LITTLE THIN. 568 00:32:09,294 --> 00:32:15,867 I HAVE TO SAY, PART OF ME, I DID NOT MEAN, CONSENT IS SO 569 00:32:15,867 --> 00:32:16,200 IMPORTANT. 570 00:32:16,200 --> 00:32:16,768 I'M SORRY. 571 00:32:16,768 --> 00:32:20,705 I'M SO SORRY ABOUT THAT. 572 00:32:20,705 --> 00:32:22,640 Jonathan: THIS IS FABULOUS. 573 00:32:22,640 --> 00:32:26,644 Stephen: SO THIS IS BASICALLY THE KANG GET UP? 574 00:32:26,644 --> 00:32:27,879 Jonathan: THAT IS THE GUY. 575 00:32:27,879 --> 00:32:31,482 Stephen: WHAT WAS IT LIKE TO PUT IT ON, WHAT DOES THAT DO 576 00:32:31,482 --> 00:32:33,718 TO SEE YOURSELF AS KANG? 577 00:32:33,718 --> 00:32:38,423 Jonathan: IT WAS AN EVENT, MAN. 578 00:32:38,423 --> 00:32:40,658 IT WAS A VERY SERIOUS BUSINESS. 579 00:32:40,658 --> 00:32:42,093 YOU KNOW? 580 00:32:42,093 --> 00:32:45,596 I SAW IT, EVERYONE-- I KNEW WHAT THE RESPONSIBILITY, THE 581 00:32:45,596 --> 00:32:50,101 POTENTIAL WAS AT LEAST. 582 00:32:50,101 --> 00:32:53,237 YOU DO YOUR TRAINING COMING INTO YOUR COSTUME FITTINGS, ALL OF 583 00:32:53,237 --> 00:32:54,505 THAT. 584 00:32:54,505 --> 00:32:57,875 BUT WHEN IT IS ALL DONE AND YOU PUT IT ON, THERE IS NO STEPPING 585 00:32:57,875 --> 00:32:58,743 BACK. 586 00:32:58,743 --> 00:33:00,445 ONCE YOU HAVE DONE IT, YOU HAVE DONE IT. 587 00:33:00,445 --> 00:33:01,746 AND YOU ARE IN IT. 588 00:33:01,746 --> 00:33:05,049 AND I REMEMBER PUTTING IT ON AND I PUT IT ON AND I WAS LIKE OH! 589 00:33:05,049 --> 00:33:10,321 NOW WE ARE KANG-9G THIS IS IT. 590 00:33:10,321 --> 00:33:15,460 AND EVERYTHING YOU DO AND THAT COSTUME IS KANG. 591 00:33:15,460 --> 00:33:17,128 THERE'S A RESPONSIBILITY TO THAT. 592 00:33:17,128 --> 00:33:17,962 THERE IS A PLAYFULNESS. 593 00:33:17,962 --> 00:33:21,632 AND IT'S A MOMENT I WILL NEVER FORGET. 594 00:33:21,632 --> 00:33:24,502 DEFINITELY UP THERE ON MY JOURNEY. 595 00:33:24,502 --> 00:33:28,406 Stephen: WE HAVE A CLIP OF YOU AS KANG COME AS YOU KNOW 596 00:33:28,406 --> 00:33:29,207 WHAT THI IS? 597 00:33:29,207 --> 00:33:31,776 DO YOU NEED TO SET IT UP IN SOME WAY? 598 00:33:31,776 --> 00:33:38,116 YOU ARE TALKING TO "ANT-MAN" AND HIS DAUGHTER. 599 00:33:38,116 --> 00:33:40,118 Jonathan: YES, THOSE ARE THE PEOPLE IN THE MOVIE. 600 00:33:40,118 --> 00:33:43,488 Stephen: SO FAR, 2 FOR 2. 601 00:33:43,488 --> 00:33:46,357 THEY ARE LIKE HE IS IN SOME SORT OF CHAMBER HERE. 602 00:33:46,357 --> 00:33:49,560 Jonathan: THIS IS THE TOP OF THE FILM. 603 00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:51,329 THIS IS KANG'S ENTRANCE. 604 00:33:51,329 --> 00:33:56,834 YOU WILL SEE, BUT HE IS ABOUT TO ADDRESS SCOTT LANGE AND CASEY 605 00:33:56,834 --> 00:34:02,974 LANG, AND THEY ARE IN A COMPROMISE POSITION. 606 00:34:02,974 --> 00:34:12,316 I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE, BECAUSE I KNOW HOW IT ENDS. 607 00:34:12,316 --> 00:34:16,954 HOW WHAT ENDS? 608 00:34:16,954 --> 00:34:22,460 ALL OF IT. 609 00:34:22,460 --> 00:34:25,730 I DON'T LIVE IN A STRAIGHT LINE. 610 00:34:25,730 --> 00:34:34,405 AND WITH TIME IT IS HARD NOT TO SKIP TO THE END. 611 00:34:34,405 --> 00:34:43,114 SO IF YOU WANT TO STOP WHAT'S COMING, AND TRUST ME, YOU DO, I 612 00:34:43,114 --> 00:34:54,826 AM THE ONLY SHOT YOU HAVE. 613 00:34:54,826 --> 00:34:56,894 SO DO WE HAVE A DEAL? 614 00:35:04,969 --> 00:35:06,904 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Stephen: NOW THIS IS NOT 615 00:35:06,904 --> 00:35:09,874 THE ONLY FILM WE ARE EXCITED ABOUT. 616 00:35:09,874 --> 00:35:11,008 THERE IS "CREED III"! 617 00:35:11,008 --> 00:35:15,246 I WILL TELL YOU THIS RIGHT NOW, THERE YOU ARE UP AGAINST 618 00:35:15,246 --> 00:35:22,053 MICHAEL B. JORDAN, A FORMER "PEOPLE'S" SEXIEST MAN ALIVE. 619 00:35:22,053 --> 00:35:23,321 FORMER. 620 00:35:23,321 --> 00:35:26,924 AND I WANT TO POINT OUT TO THAT IN "ANT-MAN," YOU ARE UP AGAINST 621 00:35:26,924 --> 00:35:29,760 ANOTHER FORMER "PEOPLE'S" SEXIEST MAN ALIVE. 622 00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:33,798 NOW YOU HAVE-- YOU HAVE MEASURED YOURSELF AGAINST BOTH 623 00:35:33,798 --> 00:35:37,568 OF THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE, DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE A SHOT? 624 00:35:37,568 --> 00:35:42,139 Jonathan: WHAT IS VERY CLEAR TO ME IS THAT I AM INDEED 625 00:35:42,139 --> 00:35:45,476 THE GATEWAY TO BECOMING THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE. 626 00:35:45,476 --> 00:35:48,946 Stephen: WORK WITH YOU, AND THAT'S WHAT IT IS. 627 00:35:48,946 --> 00:35:52,984 IT IS A CONTACT SEXY. 628 00:35:52,984 --> 00:35:54,185 Jonathan: SEXIEST MAN ALIVE! 629 00:35:54,185 --> 00:35:57,788 Stephen: WATCH WHERE YOU POINT THAT THING, I AM A MARRIED 630 00:35:57,788 --> 00:35:58,856 MAN. 631 00:35:58,856 --> 00:36:03,394 LOVELY TO MEET YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE! 632 00:36:03,394 --> 00:36:04,428 "ANT-MAN AND THE WASP: QUANTUMANIA" IS IN 633 00:36:04,428 --> 00:36:10,735 THEATERS NOW, AND "CREED III" OPENS ON MARCH 3RD! 634 00:36:10,735 --> 00:36:13,237 JONATHAN MAJORS, EVERYBODY! 635 00:36:13,237 --> 00:36:14,305 WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH A PERFORMANCE FROM PINK! 636 00:36:36,494 --> 00:36:37,495 Stephen: NOW PERFORMING "WHEN I GET THERE" FROM HER ALBUM, 637 00:36:37,495 --> 00:36:43,501 "TRUSTFALL," PINK. 638 00:36:43,501 --> 00:36:52,810 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 639 00:36:52,810 --> 00:36:59,951 ♪ I THINK OF YOU WHEN I THINK ABOUT FOREVER ♪ 640 00:36:59,951 --> 00:37:04,555 ♪ I HEAR A JOKE AND I KNOW YOU WOULD'VE TOLD IT BETTER ♪ 641 00:37:04,555 --> 00:37:06,958 ♪ I THINK OF YOU OUT OF THE BLUE ♪ 642 00:37:06,958 --> 00:37:09,393 ♪ WHEN I'M WATCHING A MOVIE THAT YOU'D HATE ♪ 643 00:37:09,393 --> 00:37:16,100 ♪ YOU'D SAY IT, YOU WERE NEVER ONE TO HESITATE ♪ 644 00:37:16,100 --> 00:37:19,170 ♪ YOU WERE ALWAYS FIRST IN LINE ♪ 645 00:37:19,170 --> 00:37:23,941 ♪ SO WHY WOULD IT BE DIFFERENT FOR HEAVEN? ♪ 646 00:37:23,941 --> 00:37:30,047 ♪ BUT I GOT A COUPLE QUESTIONS ♪ ♪ IS THERE A BAR UP THERE WHERE 647 00:37:30,047 --> 00:37:34,352 YOU'VE GOT A FAVORITE CHAIR? ♪ ♪ WHERE YOU SIT WITH FRIENDS AND 648 00:37:34,352 --> 00:37:40,057 TALK ABOUT THE WEATHER? ♪ ♪ IS THERE A PLACE YOU GO TO 649 00:37:40,057 --> 00:37:44,495 WATCH THE SUNSET? ♪ ♪ AND, OH, IS THERE A SONG YOU 650 00:37:44,495 --> 00:37:52,670 JUST CAN'T WAIT TO SHARE? ♪ ♪ YEAH, I KNOW YOU'LL TELL ME 651 00:37:52,670 --> 00:38:04,682 WHEN I GET THERE, HMM ♪ ♪ DO YOU THINK OF ME? 652 00:38:04,682 --> 00:38:06,717 DO YOU WISH THAT I WOULD SLOW DOWN? ♪ 653 00:38:06,717 --> 00:38:08,119 ♪ ARE THERE SOME THINGS THAT YOU'VE SEEN THAT FEEL LIKE HOME 654 00:38:08,119 --> 00:38:11,122 NOW? ♪ ♪ ARE YOU UP THERE CLIMBING 655 00:38:11,122 --> 00:38:15,526 TREES, SINGING BRAND NEW MELODIES? ♪ 656 00:38:15,526 --> 00:38:21,532 ♪ I HOPE YOU ARE, I KNOW YOU ARE ♪ 657 00:38:21,532 --> 00:38:27,505 ♪ IS THERE A BAR UP THERE WHERE YOU'VE GOT A FAVORITE CHAIR? ♪ 658 00:38:27,505 --> 00:38:32,643 ♪ WHERE YOU SIT WITH FRIENDS AND TALK ABOUT THE WEATHER? ♪ 659 00:38:32,643 --> 00:38:38,015 ♪ IS THERE A PLACE YOU GO TO WATCH THE SUNSET? ♪ 660 00:38:38,015 --> 00:38:44,288 ♪ AND, OH, IS THERE A SONG YOU JUST CAN'T WAIT TO SHARE? ♪ 661 00:38:44,288 --> 00:38:50,861 ♪ YEAH, I KNOW YOU'LL TELL ME WHEN I GET THERE ♪ 662 00:38:50,861 --> 00:38:59,370 ♪ YEAH, YEAH, YOU'LL TELL ME WHEN I GET THERE ♪ 663 00:38:59,370 --> 00:39:04,875 ♪ WILL YOU SAVE ME A PLACE WITH ALL THOSE PEARLS OF WISDOM? ♪ 664 00:39:04,875 --> 00:39:08,612 ♪ YEAH, I'LL MAKE SOME MISTAKES AND YOU'LL WATCH ME AS I LIVE 665 00:39:08,612 --> 00:39:13,884 THEM ♪ ♪ 'TIL I'M THROUGH, 'TIL I'M 666 00:39:13,884 --> 00:39:19,523 WITH YOU ♪ ♪ IS THERE A BAR UP THERE WHERE 667 00:39:19,523 --> 00:39:23,828 YOU'VE GOT A FAVORITE CHAIR? ♪ ♪ WHERE YOU SIT WITH FRIENDS AND 668 00:39:23,828 --> 00:39:29,066 TALK ABOUT, TALK ABOUT THE WEATHER? ♪ 669 00:39:29,066 --> 00:39:33,337 ♪ IS THERE A PLACE YOU GO TO WATCH THE SUNSET? ♪ 670 00:39:33,337 --> 00:39:44,115 ♪ AND, OH, IS THERE A SONG YOU JUST CAN'T WAIT TO SHARE? ♪ 671 00:39:44,115 --> 00:39:48,986 ♪ YEAH, I KNOW YOU'LL TELL ME WHEN I GET THERE, YEAH ♪ 672 00:39:48,986 --> 00:39:59,730 ♪ I THINK OF YOU WHE I THINK ABOUT FOREVER ♪ 673 00:39:59,730 --> 00:40:11,642 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Stephen: THANK YOU! 674 00:40:11,642 --> 00:40:13,944 PINK, EVERYBODY! 675 00:40:13,944 --> 00:40:15,012 GOOD NIGHT!