1
00:00:00,421 --> 00:00:02,833
♪♪
2
00:00:05,676 --> 00:00:08,469
I can't find
my French book anywhere.
3
00:00:08,469 --> 00:00:12,053
Probably because
you take Spanish.
4
00:00:12,053 --> 00:00:13,844
That explains it.
5
00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:17,978
Don't look now.
Here comes Alexis.
6
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I can't stand that girl.
7
00:00:19,730 --> 00:00:22,443
- Hi, KC.
- Hey, girl.
8
00:00:22,443 --> 00:00:24,445
So... did you hear?
9
00:00:24,445 --> 00:00:27,318
The school's top student
is being interviewed by
10
00:00:27,318 --> 00:00:29,410
Scholastic Accomplishments
Quarterly.
11
00:00:29,410 --> 00:00:31,362
Scholastic Accomplishments
Quarterly?
12
00:00:31,362 --> 00:00:32,953
That is, like,
the quarterly publication
13
00:00:32,953 --> 00:00:34,615
for scholastic
accomplishments.
14
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I have been dying
to get that interview.
15
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Thank you for
the heads up.
16
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Ooh, this is awkward.
17
00:00:40,501 --> 00:00:42,623
They're actually
interviewing me.
18
00:00:42,623 --> 00:00:45,506
Sorry. Thought you knew.
19
00:00:48,839 --> 00:00:51,512
Wait, so you just
click-clacked all
the way over here
20
00:00:51,512 --> 00:00:53,264
to rub it in her face?
21
00:00:53,264 --> 00:00:55,055
Why can't you just
post your brags online
22
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:57,478
like everyone else?
23
00:00:57,478 --> 00:00:59,560
Let me just
get this straight.
24
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:01,522
Um, they decided to interview
the student
25
00:01:01,522 --> 00:01:03,354
with the second-highest
GPS in the school?
26
00:01:03,354 --> 00:01:05,025
No, the first.
27
00:01:05,025 --> 00:01:06,987
Turns out I'm actually
the smartest student
28
00:01:06,987 --> 00:01:09,150
in the entire
DC-Metro area.
29
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Well, if that were true,
you would know
30
00:01:11,992 --> 00:01:15,576
that I am the smartest student
in the entire DC-Metro area.
31
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Tell it to Scholastic
Accomplishments Quarterly.
32
00:01:18,539 --> 00:01:20,251
Oh, that's right.
33
00:01:20,251 --> 00:01:21,962
They don't wanna
talk to you.
34
00:01:25,796 --> 00:01:28,419
Well, are you sure
you're not being interviewed by
35
00:01:28,419 --> 00:01:31,592
Obnoxious Accomplishments
Quarterly?
36
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:33,924
Why do you let her
get to you like that?
37
00:01:33,924 --> 00:01:36,016
She's been driving you crazy
since we were little kids.
38
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I have my reasons.
39
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Nice turkey, KC.
40
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- Thanks, Alexis.
- Just not as nice as mine.
41
00:01:46,397 --> 00:01:48,989
Are those real feathers?
42
00:01:48,989 --> 00:01:50,191
Mm-hmm.
43
00:01:50,191 --> 00:01:53,194
( shrieking )
My boa.
44
00:01:53,194 --> 00:01:55,576
I've been de-plumed.
45
00:01:56,947 --> 00:02:00,040
Nobody plucks
my best friend's feathers.
46
00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:02,243
You're going down.
47
00:02:04,084 --> 00:02:06,086
I'm not letting her
get away with this.
48
00:02:06,086 --> 00:02:08,088
I'm going to the principal,
because I know I have
a higher GPA than her,
49
00:02:08,088 --> 00:02:09,670
and I'm getting that interview.
50
00:02:09,670 --> 00:02:11,962
Are you sure you wanna
be in the nerd report?
51
00:02:11,962 --> 00:02:14,595
Hint: If you want
a social life,
the answer is no.
52
00:02:16,257 --> 00:02:19,600
Okay. Good-bye
to you, too.
53
00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:21,182
I swear, it's like no one
listens to me.
54
00:02:21,182 --> 00:02:23,023
Every time I have
something to say--
55
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( theme song begins playing )
56
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:28,269
♪ Oh, when danger
comes for you ♪
57
00:02:28,269 --> 00:02:31,232
♪ You know
I'll stand beside you ♪
58
00:02:31,232 --> 00:02:35,115
♪ 'Cause ain't nobody
keep things hustle cool ♪
59
00:02:35,115 --> 00:02:39,410
♪ I'll always find a way,
a way out of the fire ♪
60
00:02:39,410 --> 00:02:43,414
♪ Don't tell nobody,
tell nobody ♪
61
00:02:43,414 --> 00:02:45,206
♪ I'm not perfect ♪
62
00:02:45,206 --> 00:02:49,210
♪ So many things
I wanna tell you ♪
63
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♪ But I, I, I,
I keep it undercover ♪
64
00:02:53,214 --> 00:02:55,216
♪ Livin' my life,
no way to learn ♪
65
00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:57,428
♪ Doin' my thing,
gonna make it work ♪
66
00:02:57,428 --> 00:02:59,850
♪ Know I'm the realest,
baby, I'm fearless ♪
67
00:02:59,850 --> 00:03:01,892
♪ But I always
got your back ♪
68
00:03:01,892 --> 00:03:03,894
♪ Nobody can do it
like I can ♪
69
00:03:03,894 --> 00:03:06,106
♪ I gotta find out
who I am ♪
70
00:03:06,106 --> 00:03:08,769
♪ Ain't got to worry
about me ♪
71
00:03:08,769 --> 00:03:10,361
♪ It's all
part of the plan ♪
72
00:03:10,361 --> 00:03:12,653
I keep it undercover.
73
00:03:12,653 --> 00:03:13,814
I keep it
undercover.
74
00:03:17,488 --> 00:03:20,491
So I reviewed my transcript
with the principal,
75
00:03:20,491 --> 00:03:23,874
and it turns out I do have
a higher GPA than she does.
76
00:03:23,874 --> 00:03:26,627
So I will be meeting with
a reporter from the magazine
tomorrow.
77
00:03:26,627 --> 00:03:28,709
I was right.
78
00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:30,961
May I remind you,
we're spies.
79
00:03:30,961 --> 00:03:33,544
We go undercover,
not on the cover.
80
00:03:33,544 --> 00:03:34,885
You can't do that interview.
81
00:03:34,885 --> 00:03:36,677
Ernie, I earned it, okay?
82
00:03:36,677 --> 00:03:38,509
I'm not gonna give it up.
83
00:03:38,509 --> 00:03:39,890
You should know
better than anyone.
84
00:03:39,890 --> 00:03:42,142
There should be more to life
than just being a spy.
85
00:03:42,142 --> 00:03:45,015
School means a lot to me,
and I worked hard,
86
00:03:45,015 --> 00:03:46,847
and I think I deserve
to have my work recognized.
87
00:03:46,847 --> 00:03:48,689
The Organization
will never allow it.
88
00:03:48,689 --> 00:03:50,901
The Organization
will never find out,
89
00:03:50,901 --> 00:03:52,733
because you will
keep your mouth shut.
90
00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:55,946
Look, Mom and Dad
are away on a mission,
91
00:03:55,946 --> 00:03:58,569
so I'm gonna have to
step into their roles
for a second.
92
00:03:58,569 --> 00:04:01,161
( sighs )
93
00:04:02,573 --> 00:04:04,034
I know how bad
you want this, buddy.
94
00:04:06,166 --> 00:04:08,248
And I know
how hard you've worked.
95
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:09,830
I do.
96
00:04:09,830 --> 00:04:12,252
But you've gotta
cancel that interview.
97
00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,635
Okay, fine.
I will.
98
00:04:14,635 --> 00:04:16,256
Proud of ya.
99
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:18,178
Glad we had
this talk, princess.
100
00:04:18,178 --> 00:04:20,180
Okay, all right,
this is weird.
101
00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:31,772
C.W. Barnes, Scholastic
Accomplishments Quarterly.
102
00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:33,193
Oh. KC Cooper,
103
00:04:33,193 --> 00:04:36,817
scholastic accomplishments
constantly.
104
00:04:36,817 --> 00:04:39,159
I have to tell you,
I'm very excited
about this interview.
105
00:04:39,159 --> 00:04:41,902
I have read every issue
of your magazine.
106
00:04:41,902 --> 00:04:43,494
Yes. I am the one.
107
00:04:45,576 --> 00:04:48,038
I know what you did.
108
00:04:48,038 --> 00:04:50,961
And you know
what you did.
109
00:04:52,963 --> 00:04:54,755
Well, I'm excited, too.
110
00:04:54,755 --> 00:04:56,797
I think these next two days
are gonna be a lot of fun.
111
00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:58,759
Two days?
112
00:04:58,759 --> 00:05:02,763
That seems like a lot of time
for just a little blurb,
113
00:05:02,763 --> 00:05:04,685
unless you spend the first day
and a half looking for a pen.
114
00:05:04,685 --> 00:05:06,847
Blurb? Uh, I don't think so.
115
00:05:06,847 --> 00:05:09,269
I wanna do
an in-depth article,
116
00:05:09,269 --> 00:05:11,812
the likes of which
they have never seen before.
117
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:14,485
For the next 48 hours,
I'm gonna be your shadow.
118
00:05:16,196 --> 00:05:17,738
Oh, really?
119
00:05:17,738 --> 00:05:19,820
Yes. I'm gonna find
out where you go,
120
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:22,282
what you do,
and who you do it with.
121
00:05:22,282 --> 00:05:24,405
I'm gonna uncover all of
your deepest, darkest secrets.
122
00:05:24,405 --> 00:05:26,657
I'm gonna find out
everything there is to know
123
00:05:26,657 --> 00:05:29,620
about KC Cooper.
124
00:05:29,620 --> 00:05:32,162
Well, um, the first thing
you should know
125
00:05:32,162 --> 00:05:37,217
is that KC Cooper
is a fraud.
126
00:05:37,217 --> 00:05:39,590
Yeah, I am a fraud.
127
00:05:39,590 --> 00:05:41,672
A lyin', stinkin',
cheatin' fraud,
128
00:05:41,672 --> 00:05:43,764
and you cannot have me
in your magazine.
129
00:05:43,764 --> 00:05:45,305
I don't understand.
130
00:05:45,305 --> 00:05:47,468
Neither do I.
I don't understand anything.
131
00:05:47,468 --> 00:05:50,431
In fact, I don't even understand
what the word understand means
132
00:05:50,431 --> 00:05:52,312
which is why I cheat,
all the time,
133
00:05:52,312 --> 00:05:55,856
off of this young lady here.
134
00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:58,318
This much more smarter
than me lady.
135
00:05:58,318 --> 00:06:00,941
( chuckles )
That's not even
correct English,
136
00:06:00,941 --> 00:06:03,944
but I don't even
know how to speak it,
'cause I'm dumb.
137
00:06:03,944 --> 00:06:06,697
C.W., this is the person
that you need to be talking to.
138
00:06:06,697 --> 00:06:09,490
Alexis, she is
the... ahem...
139
00:06:09,490 --> 00:06:12,873
smartest person
in our class.
140
00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:16,256
( nervous chuckle )
In the entire DC-Metro area.
141
00:06:24,765 --> 00:06:28,138
Take it easy.
The drive to a mission
142
00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:30,390
shouldn't be
the most dangerous part.
143
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,102
I think someone's
following us.
144
00:06:32,102 --> 00:06:34,685
I promise, just like on
all your social media,
145
00:06:34,685 --> 00:06:38,108
no one is following you.
146
00:06:38,108 --> 00:06:40,651
Then I guess I'm just
upset about that interview.
147
00:06:40,651 --> 00:06:41,822
That reporter
really got in my head.
148
00:06:41,822 --> 00:06:44,324
The reporter?
The reporter?!
149
00:06:44,324 --> 00:06:47,157
You mean the reporter
I told you not to talk to?
150
00:06:47,157 --> 00:06:48,739
That reporter?
151
00:06:48,739 --> 00:06:50,701
Why do you always think
you know better than me?
152
00:06:50,701 --> 00:06:55,876
Because 99.999% of the time,
I do know better than you.
153
00:06:55,876 --> 00:06:57,708
I'm telling you,
someone is tailing us.
154
00:06:57,708 --> 00:06:58,959
You're paranoid. Relax.
155
00:06:58,959 --> 00:07:00,711
- You relax.
- I am relaxed.
156
00:07:00,711 --> 00:07:03,924
- ( horn honking )
- ( shrieking )
157
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:05,636
Can you relax
a little quieter?
158
00:07:09,640 --> 00:07:11,812
ERNIE: You need to intercept
the Other Side agent
159
00:07:11,812 --> 00:07:13,724
before he can
make the drop.
160
00:07:13,724 --> 00:07:15,435
We need that
flash drive.
161
00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,017
Wait. Sh.
162
00:07:17,017 --> 00:07:19,359
- I think I've got a tail.
- This again?
163
00:07:19,359 --> 00:07:21,612
The targets
are six blocks away.
164
00:07:21,612 --> 00:07:24,565
If you've got company,
they're not on the guest list.
165
00:07:24,565 --> 00:07:27,447
You would know all about
not being on a guest list,
wouldn't you?
166
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:29,159
And by the way,
167
00:07:29,159 --> 00:07:31,952
I have 112 followers.
168
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:35,165
One more word
and you're down to 111.
169
00:07:35,165 --> 00:07:37,538
I hear footsteps.
Ernie, I'm right about this.
170
00:07:37,538 --> 00:07:39,630
- Someone is following me.
- Yes, KC, we know.
171
00:07:39,630 --> 00:07:41,882
You're always right.
Now get outta there.
172
00:07:45,506 --> 00:07:46,717
Yeah, that's right.
173
00:07:46,717 --> 00:07:48,138
Eat dirt, scuzzball.
174
00:07:48,138 --> 00:07:49,800
You are dealing with
the youngest
175
00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:52,182
senior junior secret agent
in the Organization.
176
00:07:56,977 --> 00:07:58,979
Can I quote you
on that, KC?
177
00:08:06,817 --> 00:08:08,949
What were you saying
about being
178
00:08:08,949 --> 00:08:10,781
the youngest junior
secret what?
179
00:08:10,781 --> 00:08:12,783
Wow.
180
00:08:12,783 --> 00:08:15,165
You must've hit
the ground pretty hard,
181
00:08:15,165 --> 00:08:17,788
because, uh, I don't know
what you're talking about,
182
00:08:17,788 --> 00:08:19,830
or why you're even here.
183
00:08:19,830 --> 00:08:22,833
Call it reporter's intuition,
but you were acting weird.
184
00:08:22,833 --> 00:08:24,675
I thought there was
more to the story.
185
00:08:24,675 --> 00:08:25,836
Now I am sure of it.
186
00:08:25,836 --> 00:08:27,427
Get rid of him.
187
00:08:27,427 --> 00:08:29,089
The targets are in range.
188
00:08:29,089 --> 00:08:31,301
Uh, you know what?
Let's talk later.
189
00:08:31,301 --> 00:08:32,893
This isn't really
a safe place.
190
00:08:32,893 --> 00:08:36,396
Oh, so it's safe for you,
but not for me.
191
00:08:36,396 --> 00:08:38,398
Now I'm really intrigued.
192
00:08:38,398 --> 00:08:39,850
Okay, look out.
193
00:08:42,853 --> 00:08:44,735
Sweet dreams.
194
00:08:56,246 --> 00:08:57,578
Sorry, C-Dubs.
195
00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:08,338
I'll take that flash drive.
196
00:09:08,338 --> 00:09:09,880
Thank you very much.
197
00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,882
All right, C-Dubs.
198
00:09:11,882 --> 00:09:13,844
Let's roll.
199
00:09:18,679 --> 00:09:20,060
Okay, we'll go on
three, all right?
200
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:23,103
One, two...
201
00:09:26,486 --> 00:09:28,899
Three.
202
00:09:28,899 --> 00:09:30,651
I said we go on three.
203
00:09:30,651 --> 00:09:32,572
That would be
the number after two.
204
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,534
You should've listened to me.
205
00:09:34,534 --> 00:09:36,907
I told you not to
mess around with this interview.
206
00:09:36,907 --> 00:09:39,079
I told you,
I told you, I told you.
207
00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:40,791
Will you stop telling me
you told me
208
00:09:40,791 --> 00:09:42,082
and help me
get him in here?
209
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:44,374
Ready? On three.
210
00:09:44,374 --> 00:09:48,879
One, two, three.
211
00:09:50,801 --> 00:09:52,302
What? I said three.
212
00:09:52,302 --> 00:09:54,384
I know. You got
all up in my head.
213
00:09:55,846 --> 00:09:57,427
Just get in the van, please.
214
00:10:06,687 --> 00:10:09,149
Can you just admit
for once
215
00:10:09,149 --> 00:10:11,071
you wouldn't be in
this situation
216
00:10:11,071 --> 00:10:12,943
if you had done
what I told you?!
217
00:10:12,943 --> 00:10:14,735
He wouldn't know
you exist,
218
00:10:14,735 --> 00:10:16,076
and he definitely
wouldn't have followed you
219
00:10:16,076 --> 00:10:18,448
on your top-secret mission.
220
00:10:18,448 --> 00:10:19,870
Now, what do you suggest
we do with this guy
221
00:10:19,870 --> 00:10:22,502
when he wakes up?
222
00:10:45,105 --> 00:10:47,027
So up until I was,
I don't know, three years old,
223
00:10:47,027 --> 00:10:49,940
I thought it was
A-B-Z's.
224
00:10:49,940 --> 00:10:52,322
Oh, man, kids can be
so dumb.
225
00:10:52,322 --> 00:10:54,945
Even the really smart ones.
226
00:10:54,945 --> 00:10:57,698
Um...
what are we doing here?
227
00:10:57,698 --> 00:10:59,950
Apparently putting you
to sleep.
228
00:10:59,950 --> 00:11:02,082
Uh, no, no.
229
00:11:02,082 --> 00:11:03,834
No, wait, I followed you.
230
00:11:03,834 --> 00:11:05,415
No, you came up to me earlier
231
00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:07,087
and asked if we could
meet here for the interview
232
00:11:07,087 --> 00:11:09,750
and then you insisted on
getting the Hawaiian pizza,
233
00:11:09,750 --> 00:11:11,501
which you will pay
the price for later
234
00:11:11,501 --> 00:11:13,633
when it feels like you've been
slammed up against a van.
235
00:11:13,633 --> 00:11:17,057
It'll make sense,
trust me.
236
00:11:17,057 --> 00:11:20,010
Uh, well, I don't remember
any of that,
237
00:11:20,010 --> 00:11:24,064
but I guess we should
start the interview.
238
00:11:24,064 --> 00:11:25,936
Or continue it.
239
00:11:25,936 --> 00:11:27,357
Yeah, sure.
Go ahead.
240
00:11:27,357 --> 00:11:29,730
Ask away.
I am an open book.
241
00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:31,812
I have no secrets
whatsoever.
242
00:11:31,812 --> 00:11:35,115
So tell me, did you always
wanna be a journalist?
243
00:11:35,115 --> 00:11:37,778
Absolutely.
244
00:11:37,778 --> 00:11:41,321
When I was five, I did
my first investigative report.
245
00:11:41,321 --> 00:11:45,285
"Mall Santas: Lap of luxury
or knees of disease?"
246
00:11:45,285 --> 00:11:48,498
Mmm, interesting.
Please go on.
247
00:11:52,422 --> 00:11:55,635
You should've seen it.
I played him like a fiddle.
248
00:11:55,635 --> 00:11:58,178
If there's one thing
I learned from being
friends with you,
249
00:11:58,178 --> 00:12:00,140
it's that people
love to talk about themselves.
250
00:12:00,140 --> 00:12:02,392
So I managed to finish
the interview
251
00:12:02,392 --> 00:12:04,474
without giving up
any real information,
252
00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:07,187
and I still get
the recognition I deserve.
253
00:12:07,187 --> 00:12:08,438
Take that, Alexis.
254
00:12:08,438 --> 00:12:10,020
( scoffs )
255
00:12:10,020 --> 00:12:12,482
Uh, I saw that.
256
00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:14,444
- Saw what?
- You rolled your eyes.
257
00:12:14,444 --> 00:12:17,988
Well, I had to roll them,
or else I would fall asleep.
258
00:12:17,988 --> 00:12:20,200
How many times are we gonna
talk about this Alexis
259
00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,202
and Who Cares quarterly?
260
00:12:22,202 --> 00:12:25,075
Could you not mock
and criticize me
for once in your life?
261
00:12:25,075 --> 00:12:27,077
When have I ever
criticized you?
262
00:12:27,077 --> 00:12:29,039
I don't know.
Our entire friendship.
263
00:12:29,039 --> 00:12:34,134
Where is the sparkly
unicorn vest I laid out for you?
264
00:12:34,134 --> 00:12:36,086
You cannot wear flannel
on Picture Day.
265
00:12:36,086 --> 00:12:38,678
Why? It never
goes out of style.
266
00:12:38,678 --> 00:12:41,591
Because it's never
been in style.
You can't wear that.
267
00:12:41,591 --> 00:12:44,384
Not only will I wear
flannel today.
268
00:12:44,384 --> 00:12:48,018
I will wear flannel every day
for the rest of my life.
269
00:12:48,018 --> 00:12:49,059
What about when
you get married?
270
00:12:49,059 --> 00:12:51,852
Flannel veil.
271
00:12:51,852 --> 00:12:54,895
Oh, so you're blaming
your lack of style on me?
272
00:12:54,895 --> 00:12:57,277
- Is that what this is about?
- I'm stylish.
273
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:59,399
Ish.
274
00:12:59,399 --> 00:13:01,401
Look, this is about you
supporting me,
275
00:13:01,401 --> 00:13:03,073
which apparently is just
too much to ask.
276
00:13:03,073 --> 00:13:05,115
- KC.
- I don't wanna fight.
277
00:13:05,115 --> 00:13:06,666
I'm just kind of
stressed out
278
00:13:06,666 --> 00:13:08,328
because of this interview,
but you know what?
279
00:13:08,328 --> 00:13:10,330
At least it's over.
280
00:13:10,330 --> 00:13:12,292
KC, there you are.
I wanna set up a time
281
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,543
to interview
your parents.
282
00:13:13,543 --> 00:13:15,836
Uh, what do you mean
by parents?
283
00:13:15,836 --> 00:13:19,259
I mean the people
who raised you.
284
00:13:19,259 --> 00:13:22,132
Oh, that's impossible,
'cause my dad's out of town.
285
00:13:22,132 --> 00:13:23,723
Then I can wait
till he gets back.
286
00:13:23,723 --> 00:13:26,136
He's an astronaut.
287
00:13:27,427 --> 00:13:29,309
It could be months.
288
00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:31,101
Then your mom.
289
00:13:31,101 --> 00:13:33,693
She has outta-house-aphobia.
290
00:13:33,693 --> 00:13:38,358
That is the fear of
being out of the house.
291
00:13:38,358 --> 00:13:41,111
Well, then, I will
come to her.
292
00:13:41,111 --> 00:13:42,863
All right?
See you this afternoon.
293
00:13:42,863 --> 00:13:44,324
Okay.
294
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:48,288
Outta-house-aphobia?
295
00:13:48,288 --> 00:13:50,710
How are you the smartest
person in our school?
296
00:13:54,504 --> 00:13:57,257
( knocking on door )
297
00:13:57,257 --> 00:13:59,339
Hello. Anybody home?
Mrs. Cooper?
298
00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,761
- Hello.
- Coming.
299
00:14:05,055 --> 00:14:07,307
Hello, hello, hello.
300
00:14:07,307 --> 00:14:10,020
I am Kira Cooper,
KC's mother.
301
00:14:10,020 --> 00:14:11,561
How ya feelin'?
What's the dealie?
302
00:14:11,561 --> 00:14:13,773
Whazzup?!
303
00:14:13,773 --> 00:14:16,776
Oh, I'm sorry.
I know that is
old-timey expressions.
304
00:14:16,776 --> 00:14:18,188
How do you young kids
say it nowadays?
305
00:14:18,188 --> 00:14:20,150
Uh... hi.
306
00:14:20,150 --> 00:14:22,742
You kids
and your crazy slang.
307
00:14:22,742 --> 00:14:24,945
Come on.
308
00:14:24,945 --> 00:14:27,327
It's nice to meet you,
Mrs. Cooper.
309
00:14:27,327 --> 00:14:29,329
And can I just say,
you look so young
310
00:14:29,329 --> 00:14:31,041
to have a teenage daughter.
311
00:14:31,041 --> 00:14:33,703
You know what?
The secret is clean living.
312
00:14:33,703 --> 00:14:36,166
And lots and lots
and lots of makeup.
313
00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:38,588
I mean, under here,
I am an old hag.
314
00:14:40,170 --> 00:14:41,341
So you're doing
a little article about my baby?
315
00:14:41,341 --> 00:14:43,213
Yes.
316
00:14:44,424 --> 00:14:46,346
Ernie!
317
00:14:46,346 --> 00:14:47,807
What are you
doing here?
318
00:14:47,807 --> 00:14:50,270
I live here.
319
00:14:50,270 --> 00:14:53,773
Well, don't just stand there,
my son.
320
00:14:53,773 --> 00:14:55,775
Your what?!
321
00:14:55,775 --> 00:14:59,399
Give your mama some sugar.
Come here now.
322
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,401
( whispering )
I am this close
to getting my article.
323
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,193
You better not
mess it up for me.
324
00:15:03,193 --> 00:15:05,655
Oh! Look at my little boy.
325
00:15:05,655 --> 00:15:07,407
All right,
so where were we?
326
00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:09,239
We were waiting
for KC.
327
00:15:09,239 --> 00:15:11,791
We don't have to wait
for her; she's boring.
328
00:15:11,791 --> 00:15:14,034
I think she should be here.
329
00:15:14,034 --> 00:15:15,665
Well, you know what?
330
00:15:15,665 --> 00:15:18,088
She's actually at NASA
waiting for her father.
331
00:15:18,088 --> 00:15:20,340
Could be months.
332
00:15:20,340 --> 00:15:23,003
Actually, Mother,
KC is back.
333
00:15:23,003 --> 00:15:24,214
She's right upstairs.
334
00:15:24,214 --> 00:15:29,429
KC always has to be
right... upstairs.
335
00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:31,391
You're mistaken, dear.
336
00:15:31,391 --> 00:15:33,263
Don't forget,
you're still not too old
337
00:15:33,263 --> 00:15:35,015
to get a little spanking.
338
00:15:35,015 --> 00:15:36,686
Nope. She just texted me.
339
00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:38,818
Should I text her and tell her
to come on down?
340
00:15:38,818 --> 00:15:40,560
( stammering )
You know what?
341
00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:43,273
That won't be necessary.
I will be right back.
342
00:15:43,273 --> 00:15:44,404
With KC?
343
00:15:44,404 --> 00:15:45,986
( angrily )
Yes, with KC.
344
00:15:47,197 --> 00:15:49,909
I mean, you hope for
two geniuses,
345
00:15:49,909 --> 00:15:51,281
but this one
is just not that bright.
346
00:15:59,419 --> 00:16:01,001
KC's right upstairs.
347
00:16:01,001 --> 00:16:02,672
He is lucky
that I am not his mother.
348
00:16:14,474 --> 00:16:16,096
Oh, hey, C.W.
349
00:16:16,096 --> 00:16:17,307
My mom said you needed me.
What's up?
350
00:16:17,307 --> 00:16:18,558
I need both of you actually.
351
00:16:18,558 --> 00:16:20,440
Oh, well, she's upstairs,
352
00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:22,652
and I only have
a few minutes, you know.
353
00:16:22,652 --> 00:16:24,774
So much homework,
so little time.
354
00:16:24,774 --> 00:16:26,366
Go ahead.
Ask away.
355
00:16:26,366 --> 00:16:28,658
Uh, okay.
356
00:16:28,658 --> 00:16:30,950
Would you say you inherited
your work ethic from
your parents?
357
00:16:30,950 --> 00:16:32,782
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
358
00:16:32,782 --> 00:16:34,284
My parents have always
encouraged me
359
00:16:34,284 --> 00:16:35,995
to be the best I can be.
360
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:37,537
I'm sure my mom
would agree.
361
00:16:37,537 --> 00:16:40,250
But why leave it to chance?
362
00:16:40,250 --> 00:16:43,293
Why not go get her?
363
00:16:43,293 --> 00:16:47,467
I'm sure it'll be nice
for C.W. to talk to both of
you at the same time.
364
00:16:47,467 --> 00:16:50,180
Maybe even take a picture
of both of you.
365
00:16:50,180 --> 00:16:54,094
- Together.
- That would be great.
366
00:16:54,094 --> 00:16:56,686
Mmm, wouldn't it?
I'll be right back.
367
00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:03,443
♪ Mommy's home! ♪
368
00:17:05,445 --> 00:17:08,238
Oh, I'm sorry I'm late.
369
00:17:08,238 --> 00:17:11,201
I was at...
plastic surgery.
370
00:17:12,612 --> 00:17:15,325
Which is why
I look so young.
371
00:17:15,325 --> 00:17:17,367
But don't put that
in your article.
372
00:17:17,367 --> 00:17:19,499
That is off the record,
mister.
373
00:17:21,371 --> 00:17:22,542
Who's this?
374
00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:25,125
Oh, I'm KC's mother.
375
00:17:28,258 --> 00:17:29,339
Then who's that?
376
00:17:29,339 --> 00:17:34,134
KC's other mother.
377
00:17:34,134 --> 00:17:36,806
KC has two moms?
378
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:39,229
Looks like it.
379
00:17:46,606 --> 00:17:49,529
I didn't realize
KC had two moms.
380
00:17:49,529 --> 00:17:52,112
Neither did she.
381
00:17:53,693 --> 00:17:56,576
Well, it's not like when
I was a teenager.
382
00:17:56,576 --> 00:18:01,371
There's lots of ways to make
a family nowadays.
383
00:18:02,912 --> 00:18:05,295
Can I talk to you
outside for a second?
384
00:18:05,295 --> 00:18:07,467
This one is so pushy.
385
00:18:11,801 --> 00:18:13,513
One second.
386
00:18:13,513 --> 00:18:15,345
What the heck
do you think you're doing?
387
00:18:15,345 --> 00:18:17,307
Why would you come over here
and pretend to be my mother?
388
00:18:17,307 --> 00:18:20,430
You told me
I don't support you,
so I came to support you.
389
00:18:20,430 --> 00:18:23,603
That's actually really sweet.
Thank you.
390
00:18:23,603 --> 00:18:25,395
Now get outta here
before you ruin everything.
391
00:18:27,567 --> 00:18:29,819
I'm sorry.
Just to clarify,
392
00:18:29,819 --> 00:18:31,401
KC lives here with you two?
393
00:18:31,401 --> 00:18:33,323
- Her moms?
- Yeah, so?
394
00:18:33,323 --> 00:18:34,824
Just a little surprised.
395
00:18:34,824 --> 00:18:37,617
Why? 'Cause I'm white?
396
00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:39,499
No. No.
397
00:18:39,499 --> 00:18:41,291
Because my background
information says
398
00:18:41,291 --> 00:18:43,453
KC lives here
with her mom and her dad.
399
00:18:43,453 --> 00:18:45,335
A Craig Cooper?
400
00:18:45,335 --> 00:18:48,508
The guy that's in
all the family photos inside
401
00:18:48,508 --> 00:18:50,089
while you aren't in
any of them.
402
00:18:50,089 --> 00:18:51,961
There's a simple explanation
for all of that.
403
00:18:51,961 --> 00:18:54,384
I'm a vampire.
404
00:19:00,810 --> 00:19:02,432
A vampire?
405
00:19:02,432 --> 00:19:05,475
You, a vampire?
406
00:19:05,475 --> 00:19:07,647
Well, I know
it's not as original
407
00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:10,069
as having outta-house-aphobia
408
00:19:10,069 --> 00:19:12,652
while your father
is stuck in space,
409
00:19:12,652 --> 00:19:15,865
but then again, I'm not
the smartest girl in school
410
00:19:15,865 --> 00:19:18,198
- like you.
- Just help me
drag him inside.
411
00:19:23,413 --> 00:19:25,335
I can't believe it.
412
00:19:25,335 --> 00:19:26,916
You actually asked me
to help you with something.
413
00:19:26,916 --> 00:19:29,549
Excuse me, but what is
that supposed to mean?
414
00:19:29,549 --> 00:19:31,671
It means you never want
anyone's help
415
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:32,962
because you have to have
everything your way.
416
00:19:32,962 --> 00:19:34,053
Exactly.
417
00:19:36,256 --> 00:19:38,298
- Why am I on the floor?
- Hey, let me help you up.
418
00:19:41,971 --> 00:19:44,564
Your problem is
you always have to be right.
419
00:19:44,564 --> 00:19:46,516
Now we're having
a conversation.
420
00:19:46,516 --> 00:19:48,308
Why is everybody
ganging up on me?
421
00:19:48,308 --> 00:19:50,860
So you don't like that
we're challenging you?
422
00:19:50,860 --> 00:19:52,692
Probably because you're
not used to it
423
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:54,524
because you always
have to be right.
424
00:19:54,524 --> 00:19:56,576
And you always
have to be the best--
425
00:19:56,576 --> 00:19:58,318
the best student,
the best athlete,
426
00:19:58,318 --> 00:20:00,620
- the best fake mom.
- Okay, guys, this is crazy.
427
00:20:00,620 --> 00:20:03,823
Is it? You couldn't let
Alexis be in the magazine
428
00:20:03,823 --> 00:20:05,825
because you couldn't stand
the idea of people thinking
429
00:20:05,825 --> 00:20:07,247
she's better than you.
430
00:20:07,247 --> 00:20:09,499
Because she's not.
431
00:20:12,502 --> 00:20:15,465
I have a teeny, tiny, slightly
higher GPA than she does.
432
00:20:15,465 --> 00:20:16,676
I don't always
have to be the best.
433
00:20:16,676 --> 00:20:18,258
It's just that...
434
00:20:18,258 --> 00:20:19,719
You usually are?
435
00:20:19,719 --> 00:20:21,551
Hey, you said it,
I didn't.
436
00:20:21,551 --> 00:20:24,474
I really am confused.
437
00:20:24,474 --> 00:20:26,105
I don't know where all this
is suddenly coming from.
438
00:20:26,105 --> 00:20:29,649
- Suddenly?!
- This has been
going on forever.
439
00:20:29,649 --> 00:20:33,232
KC, Marisa and I are
signing up for the talent show.
440
00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:35,064
Yeah. We've
been practicing.
441
00:20:35,064 --> 00:20:36,526
Look what we can do.
Hit it, Ernie.
442
00:20:36,526 --> 00:20:42,161
( playing "Chopsticks"
off-key )
443
00:20:49,539 --> 00:20:51,961
That's great. I've been
practicing, too. May I?
444
00:20:57,757 --> 00:21:02,342
( playing "Flight of
the Bumblebee" flawlessly )
445
00:21:11,731 --> 00:21:14,103
And that's how
you play the piano.
446
00:21:14,103 --> 00:21:17,527
I'm not having
fun anymore.
447
00:21:17,527 --> 00:21:21,701
I'm never going to try
to be good at anything
ever again.
448
00:21:23,823 --> 00:21:25,535
You know what?
I just realized something.
449
00:21:26,826 --> 00:21:29,118
I should've never
quit piano lessons.
450
00:21:29,118 --> 00:21:31,791
I was really good.
451
00:21:31,791 --> 00:21:34,003
That's not the point
of the story.
452
00:21:34,003 --> 00:21:35,795
Okay, fine.
453
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:37,797
So sometimes I have
a little itty bitty
454
00:21:37,797 --> 00:21:39,969
overwhelming need to be
the absolute best
455
00:21:39,969 --> 00:21:41,801
at everything I do,
456
00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:43,593
but what's wrong with
wanting to be the best?
457
00:21:43,593 --> 00:21:46,596
Nothing, but it's also
not the end of the world
458
00:21:46,596 --> 00:21:49,929
if sometimes,
somebody else is.
459
00:21:49,929 --> 00:21:52,021
So what? I'm just supposed
to dumb myself down?
460
00:21:52,021 --> 00:21:53,733
I'm not gonna do that.
461
00:21:53,733 --> 00:21:55,395
No, we wouldn't want you
to do that.
462
00:21:55,395 --> 00:21:58,358
But all of this
"failure isn't an option" stuff
463
00:21:58,358 --> 00:22:00,319
is really
a lot of pressure.
464
00:22:00,319 --> 00:22:03,032
And when you're so focused on
beating everyone around you...
465
00:22:03,032 --> 00:22:05,825
Then I lose sight
of what's really important.
466
00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:08,828
Like the fact that I have
an amazing brother
467
00:22:08,828 --> 00:22:11,791
and best friend who are
actually very, very right.
468
00:22:11,791 --> 00:22:14,624
I'm sorry, guys,
and I will work on it.
469
00:22:14,624 --> 00:22:16,165
Okay? I promise.
470
00:22:16,165 --> 00:22:17,457
Now can we go get
some fro-yo?
471
00:22:17,457 --> 00:22:19,258
Sounds good.
472
00:22:19,258 --> 00:22:21,801
Ooh, better not
forget this.
473
00:22:21,801 --> 00:22:24,634
Mommy loves
a senior discount.
474
00:22:30,269 --> 00:22:33,232
C.W. did a really great
job with this article.
475
00:22:33,232 --> 00:22:34,854
It is very well-written.
476
00:22:34,854 --> 00:22:36,686
Best article I've read
all year.
477
00:22:36,686 --> 00:22:40,400
Okay, the only article
I've read all year.
478
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:46,115
Ooh. Enjoying the article
written about... me?
479
00:22:46,115 --> 00:22:47,827
Yes, actually.
480
00:22:47,827 --> 00:22:49,789
Congrats, Alexis.
Well-deserved.
481
00:22:49,789 --> 00:22:53,292
Oh. Thank you, KC.
482
00:22:56,496 --> 00:22:58,758
It's killing you,
isn't it?
483
00:22:58,758 --> 00:23:00,760
A little bit.