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00:00:00,133 --> 00:00:02,836
cdatcdat ♪
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cdat
All right, so what
do you got, Dadcdatcdat
3
00:00:07,140 --> 00:00:09,509
There have been a lot
of computer breaches latelyt
4
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:11,946
- ( coughing )
- Dad, you good?cdat
5
00:00:11,945 --> 00:00:15,182
Yeah, I'm fine.
Anyway...cdat
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Noah Stone, one of
the most brilliant hackers..t
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00:00:17,718 --> 00:00:19,954
( coughing )cdat
8
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( spits )cdat
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00:00:22,823 --> 00:00:25,826
Oh, my.cdatt
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00:00:25,826 --> 00:00:27,828
Yeah, you're fine.cdat
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00:00:27,828 --> 00:00:30,331
Would you like me
to get you some toast
for that lung butter?cdat
12
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I said I'm fine,
okay?cdat
13
00:00:32,833 --> 00:00:36,170
Anyway, the Organization
has traced Noahcdat
14
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to just outside Fargot
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You and I are going there
to bring that hacker in...cdt
16
00:00:42,009 --> 00:00:45,246
Yeah, why go get him
when we got a hacker right heret
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00:00:45,245 --> 00:00:47,514
Dad, obviously
you're sick.ct
18
00:00:47,514 --> 00:00:50,150
No, I'm not.
I'm perfectly...cdat
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achy and tired.cdat
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My throat is scratchy.cdat
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I think I'm getting sick.cdat
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00:00:55,589 --> 00:00:57,391
Really? What was
your first clue?cdat
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00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:59,560
Was it the chills,
the fever,cdat
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00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:03,330
me telling you over
and over that you're sick?cdt
25
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cdat
I can handle
the mission on my ownt
26
00:01:06,667 --> 00:01:08,202
No, that's not
a good idea, KC.cdat
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Will you stop
treating me like a child?cdat
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I can handle it.cdat
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Besides, how hard can it be
to take down some computer geekt
30
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Excuse me?!cdat
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Computer geeks can be
extremely dangerous.cdat
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cdat
Look at me.cdat
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Yeah, you're right.
You can handle this on your ownt
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I trust you completely.cdat
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I'm gonna hold off
on that hug.cdat
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I wanna catch a bad guy,
not a bad cold. All right.cdt
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cdat ♪ Oh, when danger
comes for you ♪cdat
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♪ You know
I'll stand beside you ♪cdat
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♪ 'Cause ain't nobody
keep things hustle cool ♪cdat
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♪ I'll always find a way,
a way out of the fire ♪cdat
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cdat ♪ Don't tell nobody,
tell nobody ♪cdat
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cdat ♪ I'm not perfect ♪cdat
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♪ So many things
I wanna tell you ♪cdat
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cdat ♪ But I, I, I,
I keep it undercover ♪cdat
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cdat ♪ Livin' my life,
no way to learn ♪cdat
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00:02:03,156 --> 00:02:05,458
♪ Doin' my thing,
gonna make it work ♪cdat
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00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:07,895
♪ Know I'm the realest,
baby, I'm fearless ♪cdat
48
00:02:07,894 --> 00:02:09,929
♪ But I always
got your back ♪cdat
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♪ Nobody can do it
like I can ♪cdat
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♪ I gotta find out
who I am ♪cdat
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♪ Ain't got to worry
about me ♪cdat
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♪ It's all
part of the plan ♪cdat
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I keep it undercover.cdat
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I keep it
undercover.cdat
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cdatcdat Noah Stone?cdat
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Maybe. Who are you?cdat
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I am your
worst nightmare.cdat
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You're a high school
Spanish classcdat
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I forgot to go to
all semester,cdat
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and suddenly there's
a big test,cdat
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and I'm not wearing
any pants but I am wearing
my grandmother's girdle?ct
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Hey, computer hacker,
you don't really talk to
a lot of real people, do you?cdt
63
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No. No, I do nott
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Well, I'm taking you
into custody.cdat
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- Oh...
- Gotcha!cdat
66
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I'm taking you
into custodyt
67
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Uh, excuse me.
Who are you?cdat
68
00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:59,313
Pinky Carter,
professional bounty hunter.cdt
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( scoffs )cdat
70
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Okay, you're
a bounty hunter?cdat
71
00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:04,551
Yes, a bounty hunter.cdat
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00:03:04,551 --> 00:03:08,655
A bounty hunter is someone who
goes after bad guys for money.t
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cdaDo you want me to explain
what money is?cdat
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Okay, you keep up
that attitude,cdat
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I'll explain what
a sock full of quarters
is like to your kneecaps.cdat
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I don't know how
you reckon things down yonder,ct
77
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but he's mine, okay?
I got him first,
so take a walk, sister.cdat
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If I'm takin' a walk,
guess I'm walkin' with yout
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- He's mine.
- No, he's mine.cdat
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I never thought two women
would be fighting over me.cdt
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I'm sure no one did.
Now let's go.cdat
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Ooh. Sounds like
she means business.cdat
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I guess you have
no choice. Uncuff me.cdat
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Look, there's a reward
on his head,cdat
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and if I don't bring
him in, I ain't
gettin' paid.cdat
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( laughs ) If you let me
out of these cuffs,cdat
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I can hack into a bank and wire
you all the money you want.cdt
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Win-win!cdat
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Look, you're not
getting it, okay?cdat
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00:03:48,762 --> 00:03:50,564
I am from
a government agency,cdat
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which means I outrank you.
Do you understand?cdat
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I don't understandt
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I'm just a dumb hayseed
from the sticks.cdat
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Maybe you should remove
your handcuffs from my prisonert
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cdat
and draw me a picturet
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00:04:04,511 --> 00:04:07,347
You know,
I am a great artist.cdat
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00:04:07,347 --> 00:04:08,715
If you let me
out of these cuffs,cdat
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00:04:08,715 --> 00:04:10,550
I can show you.
You like caricatures?cdat
99
00:04:10,550 --> 00:04:13,253
I can draw you
in a teeny, tiny car.cdat
100
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Last chance, okay?
Back off, Backwoods Barbie.cdat
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Wow, you're like
the pimple I had
on my forehead last weekt
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You just won't go awayt
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Really? Was it that one
or was it that one?cdat
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- Oh, you just get
outta here.
- You get outta here.cdat
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( arguing )cdat
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( falsetto voice )
I say we let him go.cdat
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cdatcdat
Okay, for your
next assignmentt
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you'll be pairing off
as married couples.ct
109
00:04:38,879 --> 00:04:41,281
You'll be learning
to balance a budgett
110
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raise a family, and get
through important life events.t
111
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So everybody
pick a partnert
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Hey, do you...cdat
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Hey, do...cdat
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cdatcdat
I always knew
we'd end up together.cdat
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cdat
Um, excuse me,
Mrs. Greenfield.cdat
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Is one of life's
important eventscdat
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learning to love again
after your fiancécdat
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tragically dies before
this assignment begins?cdat
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Not if you wanna
pass this class.cdat
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cdat
I was thinking somewhere
romantic for the honeymoont
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like the Lord of the Rings
Hobbit Hotel.cdat
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cdatcdat
Well, you know you're in
a real fleabag motelcdat
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if the hotel desk clerk
doesn't bat an eyecdat
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when three handcuffed
people check in tocdat
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a double occupancy room.cdat
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Yeah, I just saw a rat
crawl under the bed,cdat
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so technically,
there's four of us here.cdat
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I don't know
what we're doin' here.cdatt
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No matter who gets the credit,
we gotta get this guy to D.C.ct
130
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Nighttime's
the best time to move.cdat
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We can't move if
we can't move our feet.cdat
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We're exhausted,
so we're spending
the night here.cdat
133
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Or... you guys
can get some rest,cdat
134
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I'll get a head start,cdat
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we can all meet up in an outlet
mall in Secaucus, New Jersey,ct
136
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where you can get
a great dealcdat
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00:06:01,061 --> 00:06:02,896
on hardly irregular items,
and I'll stop talking.cdat
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All right, guys,
first things first.cdatcdat
139
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:07,801
We need to get
something to eat.cdat
140
00:06:07,801 --> 00:06:11,405
There's a convenience
store 20 miles away.cdat
141
00:06:11,404 --> 00:06:13,439
That's not convenient
at all!cdat
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cdat
What are we gonna do?
I'm starving.cdat
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Me, too.cdat
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cdat
You brought
your own food?cdatcdat
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I know I'm not
very bright,cdat
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on account of you
explaining that to me,cdat
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but I'm smart enough
to know I like to eat.cdat
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cdatcdat
Ooh, still hot.cdat
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00:06:35,762 --> 00:06:38,665
Is that tomato?cdat
150
00:06:38,665 --> 00:06:41,601
Yeah, made from freshly
picked tomatoes right
from my own garden.cdat
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cdat
Do I detect
a hint of basil?cdatcdat
152
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Also from my own gardent
153
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cdat
Um, can I, uh,cdat
154
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please have some of that?cdat
155
00:06:55,615 --> 00:06:57,117
Sorry, city slicker.ct
156
00:06:57,117 --> 00:06:59,186
Only enough for
me and the prisonert
157
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cdatcdat
- I feel bad eatin'
in front of you.
- Thank you.cdat
158
00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:12,232
So you unlock yourself
and go get you something.ct
159
00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:13,633
We'll wait right heret
160
00:07:13,633 --> 00:07:15,201
You know what?
I'm fine.cdat
161
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I have been trained
to go days without eating.cdat
162
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cdat
( stomach growling loudly )cdatt
163
00:07:23,877 --> 00:07:26,279
Okay, I have been trained,
but my stomach hasn't.cdat
164
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Please just give me
a little bite, guys.cdatct
165
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cdatcdat
Here you go, honey.cdat
166
00:07:36,656 --> 00:07:39,826
I need my other blanket.
This one's scratchy.cdat
167
00:07:39,826 --> 00:07:42,395
At least you get
a blanket.cdat
168
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I sleep in a box.cdat
169
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:48,668
- Here you go, sweetheart.
- Thank you.cdatcdat
170
00:07:48,668 --> 00:07:50,904
Why can't he do
anything for himself?cdat
171
00:07:50,904 --> 00:07:52,439
He's sick.cdat
172
00:07:52,439 --> 00:07:54,174
What kind of sickness
turns a grown mancdat
173
00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:56,843
- into a baby?
- Every kind.cdat
174
00:07:58,178 --> 00:08:02,249
But he is my husband
in sickness and in health.cdt
175
00:08:02,248 --> 00:08:04,951
cdat
And he'd do it for me,
so it's all good.cdat
176
00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:07,187
Sweetheart, would you
get me some soup?cdat
177
00:08:07,187 --> 00:08:08,488
Sure, baby.
I'll go heat some up for you.cdt
178
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:10,090
Oh, canned soup?cdat
179
00:08:10,090 --> 00:08:13,160
I was hoping for my mama's
make-you-feel-better soup.cdt
180
00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:16,496
Are you suggestingcdat
181
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that I call your mother,cdat
182
00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:20,367
get the recipe,cdat
183
00:08:20,367 --> 00:08:22,603
go to the store,
buy all the ingredients,cdat
184
00:08:22,602 --> 00:08:25,271
and spend the next
three hourscdat
185
00:08:25,271 --> 00:08:26,672
making you soup?cdat
186
00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:29,176
I would do it myself,
but I'm just...cdat
187
00:08:29,175 --> 00:08:31,678
( coughing )
so sick.cdat
188
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:34,514
All right, fine.
I'll make your mama's soup.cdt
189
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:36,983
Thank you. And sweetheart,
before you go.cdat
190
00:08:36,983 --> 00:08:39,052
- Uh-huh?
- Am I hot?cdat
191
00:08:39,052 --> 00:08:41,855
No, honey, you definitely
ain't hot.cdat
192
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:53,833
cdatcdat
Ooh, I am tired.cdat
193
00:08:53,833 --> 00:08:56,469
If I don't get
my eight hours, I am no good.ct
194
00:08:56,469 --> 00:08:58,571
You're wanted
in all 50 states.cdat
195
00:08:58,571 --> 00:08:59,939
We know you're no good.cdat
196
00:09:01,708 --> 00:09:05,011
Besides, the second
we fall asleep,
you're gonna try to escape.cdatt
197
00:09:05,011 --> 00:09:06,846
That's not true.cdat
198
00:09:06,846 --> 00:09:09,215
I'd wait ten minutes at least,
just to be sure.cdat
199
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,984
Wait. You insist that we
check into a motelcdat
200
00:09:11,985 --> 00:09:14,754
so we don't get
a good night's sleept
201
00:09:14,754 --> 00:09:18,224
I'm just learning so much
from you, professional.ct
202
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:20,593
Calling me professional
is not an insult.cdat
203
00:09:20,593 --> 00:09:21,961
It's just accurate.cdat
204
00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:25,365
Now we are not gonna sleep.cdatt
205
00:09:25,365 --> 00:09:27,434
We're just gonna
get some rest, all right?cdat
206
00:09:27,434 --> 00:09:29,002
- Ow!
- Oh, sorry.cdat
207
00:09:29,002 --> 00:09:31,171
Other way. Ow!cdat
208
00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:33,340
Okay, this is nuts.
We gotta do this together.cdt
209
00:09:33,339 --> 00:09:36,843
On three.
One, two, three.cdat
210
00:09:36,843 --> 00:09:38,345
cdat
Scooch.cdat
211
00:09:38,344 --> 00:09:40,680
Scooch.cdat
212
00:09:43,783 --> 00:09:47,186
cdat
- I need to be
on the right or--
- For reals?cdat
213
00:09:47,187 --> 00:09:48,922
I'll never get to sleep.cdat
214
00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:51,224
How are we
gonna do that?cdat
215
00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,560
Lift your leg,
I'll go under.cdat
216
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:55,796
KC: Watch the arm.cdat
217
00:09:55,795 --> 00:09:57,730
Like that.cdat
218
00:09:57,730 --> 00:09:59,365
Okay, that's good.cdat
219
00:10:01,401 --> 00:10:03,770
- I need to be
on my stomach.
- Are you serious?cdatcdt
220
00:10:06,806 --> 00:10:09,208
cdat
This is ridiculous.cdat
221
00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:12,379
That's my arm,
that's my armt
222
00:10:16,816 --> 00:10:18,818
cdatcdat
- Yeah, I meant the left.
- KC: Hey!cdat
223
00:10:18,818 --> 00:10:21,287
No more movingt
224
00:10:24,591 --> 00:10:27,127
cdat
( gunfire )cdat
225
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:29,496
( shrieking )cdat
226
00:10:31,231 --> 00:10:33,734
cdat
- What was that?
- Laser fire.cdatcdat
227
00:10:33,733 --> 00:10:36,002
Let me put that in a way
you might understand.cdat
228
00:10:36,002 --> 00:10:38,304
Pew, pew. Pew, pew,
pew, pew, pew.cdat
229
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:40,006
I know what a laser is.cdat
230
00:10:40,006 --> 00:10:42,242
I meant who's shootin'
at us and why?cdat
231
00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:44,945
Probably the guy who hired me
to hack the security systemcdt
232
00:10:44,944 --> 00:10:47,146
I didn't hack because
you caught me.cdat
233
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:49,750
You know what?
We need to go to the bathroom.ct
234
00:10:49,749 --> 00:10:52,151
Oh, really? Is now the best
time to try to figure that out?t
235
00:10:52,152 --> 00:10:53,954
MAN: We know
you're in there, Noah.cdat
236
00:10:53,953 --> 00:10:55,455
Come out
or we're coming in.cdat
237
00:10:55,455 --> 00:10:58,024
So much for
the do not disturb
sign. Let's go.cdat
238
00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:02,996
cdat
Is now a bad time to mention
I'm afraid of heights?cdatt
239
00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:05,866
I'm just kidding.
I know it's a bad time.cdat
240
00:11:05,865 --> 00:11:09,268
Don't worry.
We're not gonna
be up here very long.cdat
241
00:11:09,269 --> 00:11:10,871
We're jumping.cdat
242
00:11:10,870 --> 00:11:13,172
Jumpin'? And you think
I'm the dumb one?cdat
243
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,308
It's our only chance, okay?
We go on three.cdat
244
00:11:15,308 --> 00:11:17,844
Thousand. We go on 3,000.t
245
00:11:17,844 --> 00:11:20,180
- One...
- Let's talk about this.cdat
246
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:22,015
- Two.
- Please stop counting.cdat
247
00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:24,784
- BOTH: Three.
- ( screaming )cdat
248
00:11:30,290 --> 00:11:31,525
cdatcdat
( scream echoing )cdat
249
00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:32,892
Okay, on our butts.cdat
250
00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:38,165
cdat
- Now what?
- We run.cdat
251
00:11:38,164 --> 00:11:39,899
( screaming )cdat
252
00:11:39,899 --> 00:11:41,000
BOTH: We'll go your way.cdat
253
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,902
( screaming )cdat
254
00:11:42,902 --> 00:11:44,637
It's all right.
I'm just a computer guy.cdat
255
00:11:44,637 --> 00:11:46,906
It's not like
I need my hands.cdat
256
00:11:46,906 --> 00:11:49,175
Do you get paid extra for
bringing him in in one piece?ct
257
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:50,576
- No.
- Good to know.cdat
258
00:11:50,577 --> 00:11:52,312
Let's got
259
00:11:55,014 --> 00:11:58,184
cdat
Let's take a look at
our marital profilet
260
00:11:58,184 --> 00:12:01,254
Okay, it says here
I'm a court stenographet
261
00:12:01,254 --> 00:12:03,990
making $53,000
a year.cdat
262
00:12:03,990 --> 00:12:07,727
You're a dental hygienist
making $42,000 a year.cdt
263
00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,295
cdat
Uh, yeah, no.cdat
264
00:12:11,097 --> 00:12:13,499
No, see, that can't
be right,cdatcdat
265
00:12:13,499 --> 00:12:15,935
because I would never
have a job making
less money than you,cdat
266
00:12:15,935 --> 00:12:18,938
or touching people's
filthy mouths.cdat
267
00:12:20,340 --> 00:12:22,442
cdat
In fact,
I don't want a job.cdatcdat
268
00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:25,779
I see myself
as a wealthy philanthropistcdat
269
00:12:25,778 --> 00:12:28,581
who entertains
dignitaries on her yacht.cdat
270
00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:31,350
And I see myself
passing this classt
271
00:12:31,351 --> 00:12:33,386
One of our dreams
could actually come truet
272
00:12:33,386 --> 00:12:35,355
So pick a place to livet
273
00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:38,024
I suggest we get
a starter home in the suburbs.ct
274
00:12:38,024 --> 00:12:40,894
Or we'd save lots of money
by living with my parentst
275
00:12:40,893 --> 00:12:44,063
- and buying
an even nicer house.
- Ew! No way!cdat
276
00:12:44,063 --> 00:12:46,065
Why not?
You practically
live here alreadyt
277
00:12:46,065 --> 00:12:47,567
You are so controlling.cdat
278
00:12:47,567 --> 00:12:49,769
I never should
have married you.cdat
279
00:12:51,304 --> 00:12:53,373
You think you're
a bed of roses?t
280
00:12:53,373 --> 00:12:55,542
I don't even
know you anymoret
281
00:12:56,876 --> 00:12:59,078
Will you two stop it?cdatct
282
00:12:59,078 --> 00:13:01,080
You wanna know how to make
a relationship work?cdat
283
00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:02,481
Just look at
Craig and Kira.cdat
284
00:13:02,482 --> 00:13:06,586
I spent five hours
making his mama's dang soup.ct
285
00:13:06,586 --> 00:13:08,221
cdat
He doesn't like it.cdat
286
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:10,090
Now he wants me
to heat up a cancdat
287
00:13:10,089 --> 00:13:12,058
like I wanted to do
in the first place.cdat
288
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:13,493
That man is driving me crazy!ct
289
00:13:14,994 --> 00:13:18,164
CRAIG: Hurry, Kira.
I think I'm dying.cdatcdt
290
00:13:18,164 --> 00:13:20,500
I should be so lucky.cdat
291
00:13:26,239 --> 00:13:29,409
cdatcdat
Okay, this is the saddest
marionette show I've ever seen.t
292
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:33,146
cdat
Look, Annie Oakley,cdatcdt
293
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,981
I hate to interrupt
your whittlin',cdat
294
00:13:34,981 --> 00:13:36,416
but those guys are long gone,
so we should keep going.cdat
295
00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:37,651
Oh, reallyt
296
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:39,452
Because I grew up huntin't
297
00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:42,088
and I think they're just
waitin' for us to
come out in the opencdat
298
00:13:42,088 --> 00:13:44,190
so they can pick us off
like a six-point buck.t
299
00:13:44,190 --> 00:13:45,992
Here's another point.
That's disgusting.cdat
300
00:13:45,992 --> 00:13:48,995
You shouldn't be
bragging about hunting
defenseless animals.cdat
301
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:50,797
Yeah, she's right.
Hunting is gross.cdat
302
00:13:50,797 --> 00:13:52,766
Would you prefer us
gettin' caughtcdat
303
00:13:52,765 --> 00:13:55,501
and taken out
by your bosst
304
00:13:55,501 --> 00:13:57,837
I don't know about you,
but I'd rather be the hunter
than the hunted.cdat
305
00:13:59,305 --> 00:14:02,108
On the other hand,
hunting can be kinda cool.cdt
306
00:14:02,108 --> 00:14:04,711
Look, we need to move.cdat
307
00:14:04,711 --> 00:14:06,646
We gotta find somewhere
to sleep tonight.cdat
308
00:14:06,646 --> 00:14:08,181
I already got onet
309
00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:10,183
I'm buildin'
a lean-to.ct
310
00:14:13,119 --> 00:14:16,189
cdat
I guess a lean-to
will work.cdatcdat
311
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:21,394
cdat
Oh, sorry,
Miss High and Mighty.t
312
00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:24,297
It's a lean two,
not a lean threet
313
00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:30,570
cdatcdat
Whatever happened to
southern hospitality?cdat
314
00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:34,040
Just gonna leave me
out here high and dry.cdatt
315
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:36,142
( thunder rumbles,
rain falling )cdat
316
00:14:37,510 --> 00:14:39,379
I said high and dry!
Get over!cdatcdat
317
00:14:39,379 --> 00:14:42,082
Sorry. No room
at the inn. Get outt
318
00:14:42,081 --> 00:14:44,317
There would be plenty
of room if you shut
your big mouth!cdat
319
00:14:47,086 --> 00:14:49,088
cdat
Would you both shush?
I think I heard something.cdt
320
00:14:49,088 --> 00:14:51,524
Probably just a crittert
321
00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:54,060
MAN: I see footprints.
I think they're over
there in that lean-to.cdat
322
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:56,029
I'm outta here.
I'd invite you two to join me,ct
323
00:14:56,028 --> 00:14:58,163
but you know what,
you don't really have
a choice, do you?cdat
324
00:15:03,536 --> 00:15:05,171
cdatcdat
( coughing )cdat
325
00:15:07,273 --> 00:15:09,075
Guess all I needed
was a good night's rest.cdat
326
00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:11,945
I feel great.cdat
327
00:15:11,944 --> 00:15:13,546
What you doing,
napping in the morning?cdat
328
00:15:13,546 --> 00:15:15,882
I don't feel good.cdat
329
00:15:15,882 --> 00:15:18,118
Buck up, you're fine.cdat
330
00:15:18,117 --> 00:15:20,086
But I'm not.cdat
331
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:23,289
My throat's all scratchy,
I feel achy.cdat
332
00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:25,124
I think I need some tea.cdat
333
00:15:25,124 --> 00:15:27,860
That's a good idea.
I'm going out for a run.cdat
334
00:15:31,297 --> 00:15:34,634
cdat
I'm sure he's just running out
to get you some tissues.cdat
335
00:15:34,634 --> 00:15:37,103
And by the way,
I hate to pile oncdat
336
00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:39,105
but it's "well."cdat
337
00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:41,174
You don't feel well.cdat
338
00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:50,717
cdatcdat
- NOAH: Oh, wait,
that's my boss' car.
- KC: That hunk of junk?cdat
339
00:15:50,716 --> 00:15:53,652
I guess they're right
when they say crime
really doesn't pay.cdat
340
00:15:53,653 --> 00:15:56,289
Hopefully, he doesn't
mind if we borrow it,cdat
341
00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:58,458
'cause fortunately,
my bracelet has
lock-picking capabilities.cdat
342
00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,860
- Stand back.
- You stand back.cdat
343
00:16:05,164 --> 00:16:10,069
cdat
Fortunately, my brain
has "opening an unlocked
door" capability.cdat
344
00:16:10,069 --> 00:16:11,170
cdat
Who's gonna drive?cdat
345
00:16:11,170 --> 00:16:13,239
- BOTH: I will.
- ( gunfire )cdat
346
00:16:13,239 --> 00:16:15,174
On second thought, you drive.
Let's go. Move it.cdat
347
00:16:15,174 --> 00:16:16,709
Move it, move it, move it!cdat
348
00:16:23,182 --> 00:16:25,685
cdatcdat
( sneezes )cdat
349
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:28,888
cdat
Sorry.cdatcdat
350
00:16:31,157 --> 00:16:33,192
Okay, look, this has
all been really fun
and everything,cdatcdat
351
00:16:33,192 --> 00:16:35,361
but you should know
that when we get to D.C.,cdat
352
00:16:35,361 --> 00:16:36,762
I need to be
the one to take him in.cdat
353
00:16:36,762 --> 00:16:38,964
Sorry. I can't let you
do that, KC.cdat
354
00:16:38,965 --> 00:16:40,500
My dad is countin' on me.cdat
355
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:42,202
What are you talking about?cdt
356
00:16:42,201 --> 00:16:44,704
The thing is,
my daddy and my mamacdat
357
00:16:44,704 --> 00:16:46,539
and my little brother
and sister,cdat
358
00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:48,441
we're all bounty hunters.cdat
359
00:16:48,441 --> 00:16:52,512
Takin' down bad guys is sorta
like our family business.cdat
360
00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:55,448
Wait. So you work with your
family to take down bad guys?ct
361
00:16:55,448 --> 00:16:59,285
- Mm-hmm.
- That's weird.cdat
362
00:16:59,285 --> 00:17:01,354
You know, I think
it's really sweetcdat
363
00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:02,722
that you two are bonding,cdat
364
00:17:02,722 --> 00:17:05,291
but I haven't slept
in three days,cdat
365
00:17:05,291 --> 00:17:08,127
Can we pull over so I can
take a nap, please?cdat
366
00:17:08,127 --> 00:17:10,363
( yawning )
Okay. Okay, fine.cdat
367
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:14,133
But we have to all promise
that none of us are gonna
try to escape.cdat
368
00:17:14,133 --> 00:17:16,135
cdat
Okay? So pinky swear, Pinky?cdat
369
00:17:16,135 --> 00:17:17,903
Or Pinky, do you swear?cdat
370
00:17:17,904 --> 00:17:21,674
I know I was swearin' a lot
when you first showed up.cdat
371
00:17:21,674 --> 00:17:23,276
Oh, just give me
your pinky, Pinky.cdat
372
00:17:27,013 --> 00:17:30,350
cdat
I'm sick of arguing
with you over everything.cdat
373
00:17:30,349 --> 00:17:32,384
Can we just decide how many
kids we're having?cdat
374
00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:34,254
I'm thinking four.cdat
375
00:17:34,253 --> 00:17:35,921
That seems like
a nightmare.cdat
376
00:17:35,922 --> 00:17:37,857
For the kids.cdat
377
00:17:37,857 --> 00:17:40,693
Seriously?
Four kidst
378
00:17:40,693 --> 00:17:43,429
There is no way I am
having four kids.cdat
379
00:17:43,429 --> 00:17:45,598
When would I find the time
to hire and managecdat
380
00:17:45,598 --> 00:17:47,834
all of those nannies?cdat
381
00:17:47,833 --> 00:17:49,768
No nannies.cdat
382
00:17:49,769 --> 00:17:51,371
I wanna be
a stay-at-home dad.cdat
383
00:17:51,370 --> 00:17:53,239
You expect me to support
this familycdat
384
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:55,274
on a dental hygienist's
salary?!cdat
385
00:17:55,274 --> 00:17:56,909
Forget it.cdat
386
00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:58,878
Come on.
I really wanna hearcdat
387
00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:00,713
the pitter-patter
of little feet.cdat
388
00:18:00,713 --> 00:18:02,515
Get a dog.cdat
389
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,352
Fine. But if we don't
have kids,cdatcdat
390
00:18:06,352 --> 00:18:09,088
then what do we do
with the $200,000cdat
391
00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:10,890
saved in the college fund?cdt
392
00:18:10,890 --> 00:18:15,428
We saved $200,000t
393
00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:18,431
cdat
We're millionairest
394
00:18:18,431 --> 00:18:20,700
Yeah, I don't think
you're gonna have to worrycdt
395
00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:22,802
about your kids
going to college.cdat
396
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:31,511
cdatcdat
Oh, sorry.
For a second, I forgot...cdat
397
00:18:32,578 --> 00:18:34,647
That I wasn't
handcuffed to anybody!cdatt
398
00:18:36,315 --> 00:18:38,284
Dang it!
Cannot believe I got dupedcdt
399
00:18:38,284 --> 00:18:40,453
by that bumpkin spice latte.ct
400
00:18:44,223 --> 00:18:46,092
cdatcdat
So as you can seet
401
00:18:46,092 --> 00:18:47,794
my husband Ernestt
402
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:52,131
a very well-respected
court stenographer,
and I,cdat
403
00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:55,167
cdat
have decided not to have
any children.cdat
404
00:18:55,167 --> 00:18:59,104
And that dramatically
increased our disposable incomet
405
00:18:59,105 --> 00:19:01,341
cdat
I can now afford
a fancy sports car.cdat
406
00:19:02,908 --> 00:19:04,777
cdat
And we purchased
a second home.ct
407
00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:06,412
A ski house in Vermont.ct
408
00:19:06,412 --> 00:19:10,182
That way, we never have to
actually see each other.cdat
409
00:19:10,182 --> 00:19:13,085
Which makes me think
this marriage can last forever.t
410
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:16,823
cdat
But you didn't do
the assignment.cdatcdat
411
00:19:16,822 --> 00:19:18,991
You were supposed to balance
a budget for a family.cdat
412
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:21,160
( both laughing )cdat
413
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,996
This isn't the oldie days,
Mrs. Greenfield.cdat
414
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:28,467
Right. You can be a family
without having any kids.cdat
415
00:19:28,467 --> 00:19:31,637
cdat
Welcome to 2016.cdat
416
00:19:31,637 --> 00:19:34,773
I guess you guys
kinda do make a point.cdat
417
00:19:34,774 --> 00:19:38,411
All right. I am giving
Marisa and Ernie an "A."cdat
418
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:43,515
cdat
You know, we make
a really good team...cdatcdat
419
00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:45,551
Mrs. Cooper.cdat
420
00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:46,786
Uh, nah.cdat
421
00:19:56,462 --> 00:19:59,732
cdatcdat
See? This is why
I don't go outside.cdat
422
00:19:59,732 --> 00:20:01,968
This never would've happened
inside my parents' basement.cdat
423
00:20:01,967 --> 00:20:03,902
We're trappedt
424
00:20:03,903 --> 00:20:05,838
I don't see any way
out of this, short
of a miracle.cdat
425
00:20:05,838 --> 00:20:08,541
Aw, did you just
call me a miracle?cdat
426
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:10,543
I always knew deep down,
you admired me.cdat
427
00:20:10,543 --> 00:20:13,813
If I didn't before,
I sure do now.
Help us.cdat
428
00:20:13,813 --> 00:20:15,481
Oh, I would love to,cdat
429
00:20:15,481 --> 00:20:18,884
right after
I secure my prisoner.cdat
430
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,423
cdat
Great. We're all
back together.cdatcdat
431
00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:29,027
cdatcdat
Yeah, he's not
firing back.cdat
432
00:20:29,028 --> 00:20:31,063
- I think I scared him off.
- Think again.cdat
433
00:20:43,542 --> 00:20:45,944
cdatcdat
I hope you'll still give me
a good recommendation.cdat
434
00:20:45,945 --> 00:20:47,613
I get all my work
on referrals.cdat
435
00:21:01,761 --> 00:21:04,397
cdatcdat
Aw, come on! What did I do
to deserve this?cdat
436
00:21:04,396 --> 00:21:06,565
Hacked a bunch of computerst
437
00:21:06,565 --> 00:21:08,634
Stole sensitive
information.cdat
438
00:21:08,634 --> 00:21:09,969
Sold secrets to
the highest biddert
439
00:21:09,969 --> 00:21:12,472
But you know what.
Don't beat yourself up.cdat
440
00:21:17,643 --> 00:21:20,479
cdatcdat
Hey, Kira,
how you doing?cdat
441
00:21:20,479 --> 00:21:22,047
Leave me alone.cdat
442
00:21:22,047 --> 00:21:23,448
What's wrong?cdat
443
00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:25,217
What's wrong?cdat
444
00:21:25,217 --> 00:21:28,253
You know, you get sick,
and I took care of you.cdat
445
00:21:28,254 --> 00:21:30,089
But the moment
I don't feel well,cdat
446
00:21:30,089 --> 00:21:33,526
then you just disappear
and run out the door.cdat
447
00:21:35,628 --> 00:21:37,497
cdat
Oh, really?cdatt
448
00:21:37,496 --> 00:21:39,765
Well, for your information,
I just went and got youcdat
449
00:21:39,765 --> 00:21:42,835
your favorite Chinese
hot and sour soup.cdt
450
00:21:46,005 --> 00:21:49,175
cdat
You mean, you went
all the way across towncdat
451
00:21:49,175 --> 00:21:50,910
to bring me
my favorite Chinese soup?cdat
452
00:21:50,910 --> 00:21:53,012
I knew it always
makes you feel better.t
453
00:21:53,012 --> 00:21:57,783
- Aw, Craig.
You're the best.
- Oh!cdat
454
00:21:57,783 --> 00:22:00,686
cdat
- Honey, I'm sorry
I misjudged you.
- It happens.cdat
455
00:22:00,686 --> 00:22:03,489
I'd give you a big kiss,
but I don't wanna make
you sick again.cdat
456
00:22:03,489 --> 00:22:04,924
( shudders t
457
00:22:11,964 --> 00:22:14,133
cdatcdat
Where are you going?
You just got home.cdat
458
00:22:14,133 --> 00:22:15,668
Back to the Chinese place.cdt
459
00:22:15,668 --> 00:22:17,036
Kira took my soup.cdat
460
00:22:21,707 --> 00:22:23,509
cdatcdat
Well, that's the buildint
461
00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:25,778
where we're supposed
to hand over this clownt
462
00:22:25,778 --> 00:22:27,713
Oh, clown.cdat
463
00:22:27,713 --> 00:22:30,349
You have a cute little
nickname for me and everything.t
464
00:22:30,349 --> 00:22:31,984
What do you say we rethink
this wholecdat
465
00:22:31,984 --> 00:22:33,519
takin' me to jail business?cdt
466
00:22:33,519 --> 00:22:35,721
Oh, zip it.cdat
467
00:22:35,721 --> 00:22:38,657
Well, go on.
Take him in.cdat
468
00:22:38,657 --> 00:22:40,626
Me?!cdat
469
00:22:40,626 --> 00:22:41,627
Yeah, you.cdat
470
00:22:41,627 --> 00:22:43,162
I mean, you deserve it.cdat
471
00:22:43,162 --> 00:22:44,964
I gotta admit,
you outsmarted me at every turnt
472
00:22:44,964 --> 00:22:47,066
Yeah, then you
saved my hide.cdat
473
00:22:47,066 --> 00:22:49,068
If it weren't for you,
I wouldn't be herecdat
474
00:22:49,068 --> 00:22:50,536
to accept the bounty.
He's all yours.cdat
475
00:22:50,536 --> 00:22:51,670
Really, I think
you should take him in.cdat
476
00:22:51,670 --> 00:22:52,938
- No, you take him in.
- You do it.cdat
477
00:22:56,709 --> 00:22:59,378
cdat
First one to find him
takes him in.cdat
478
00:22:59,378 --> 00:23:00,446
You're on.cdat