1 00:00:00,133 --> 00:00:02,836 cdatcdat ♪ 2 00:00:05,439 --> 00:00:07,441 cdat Okay, KC, the smuggler we're looking forcdatcdat 3 00:00:07,441 --> 00:00:10,010 visits his grandfather at this senior center.cdat 4 00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:13,213 He only comes once a week, so this is your only chance to get that tracker on him.cdt 5 00:00:13,213 --> 00:00:14,381 Don't mess this up.cdat 6 00:00:14,381 --> 00:00:15,782 KC: I know, OK.cdat 7 00:00:15,782 --> 00:00:17,951 Ernie, will you stop reminding me!cdat 8 00:00:17,951 --> 00:00:19,052 It's gettin' old.cdat 9 00:00:24,324 --> 00:00:26,693 cdatcdat Hey! How ya doin'? Bernie Burns.cdat 10 00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:29,963 Only two things visible from space, all right?cdat 11 00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:31,965 The Great Wall of China and that ugly shirt!cdat 12 00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:33,733 Ay! Oh!cdat 13 00:00:33,734 --> 00:00:36,237 You just got burned by Bernie Burns!cdat 14 00:00:36,236 --> 00:00:39,005 Oh, man. Look at these twot 15 00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:41,809 More wrinkles than a box of raisins. Ay! Oh!t 16 00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,746 cdat Burned by the Burnster!cdatt 17 00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:48,349 Hey! Bernie Burns here. I used to be a nightclub comedian.ct 18 00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:50,317 You know what happened when I played Atlantic City?ct 19 00:00:50,317 --> 00:00:52,619 Everyone left and went to Vegas. Ay! Oh!cdat 20 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:57,357 I just burned myself. Nobody's off-limits!cdatcdt 21 00:00:57,357 --> 00:00:58,692 ( theme music playing )cdat 22 00:00:58,692 --> 00:01:02,396 ♪ Oh, when danger comes for you ♪cdat 23 00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:05,833 ♪ You know I'll stand beside you ♪cdat 24 00:01:05,832 --> 00:01:08,868 ♪ 'Cause ain't nobody keep their heads so cool ♪ct 25 00:01:08,869 --> 00:01:11,238 ♪ I'll always find a way ♪ct 26 00:01:11,238 --> 00:01:14,408 ♪ A way out of the fire ♪cdt 27 00:01:14,408 --> 00:01:17,244 ♪ But don't tell nobody, tell nobody ♪cdat 28 00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:19,213 ♪ I'm not perfect ♪cdat 29 00:01:19,212 --> 00:01:23,249 ♪ So many things I wanna tell you ♪cdat 30 00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,886 cdat ♪ But I ♪cdat 31 00:01:25,886 --> 00:01:27,121 ♪ I keep it undercover! ♪cdt 32 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:29,289 ♪ Living my life on red alert ♪t 33 00:01:29,289 --> 00:01:31,458 ♪ Doing my thing, I'll make it work ♪cdat 34 00:01:31,458 --> 00:01:33,593 ♪ Know I'm the realest, baby, I'm fearless ♪cdat 35 00:01:33,594 --> 00:01:35,763 ♪ But I always got your back t 36 00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:37,964 ♪ Nobody can do it like I can ♪t 37 00:01:37,965 --> 00:01:40,201 ♪ I gotta find out who I am ♪t 38 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,469 ♪ Ain't got to worry about me ♪t 39 00:01:42,469 --> 00:01:44,371 ♪ It's all part of the plan ♪t 40 00:01:44,371 --> 00:01:46,607 ♪ I keep it undercover ♪cdt 41 00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,275 ♪ I keep it undercover ♪cdt 42 00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:53,580 cdat ( indistinct chatter )cdatt 43 00:01:53,580 --> 00:01:54,948 Hey, Grandpa.cdat 44 00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:06,827 cdatcdErnie, I've got eyes on the target.cdat 45 00:02:06,827 --> 00:02:08,729 I'm gonna make contact and get the tracker on him.cdt 46 00:02:10,097 --> 00:02:13,734 Hey, is that who I think it is?cdatcdat 47 00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:16,503 Look at you. I remember when you were just a little whipper snapper.cdat 48 00:02:16,503 --> 00:02:18,138 Now you're a big snapper, huh!ct 49 00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:21,642 What, you don't remember me?cdat 50 00:02:21,642 --> 00:02:25,079 I got your nose.cdat 51 00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:27,681 Now you remember me? Give your Uncle Bernie a hug.ct 52 00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:29,950 You-- you must think I'm someone else.cdt 53 00:02:29,950 --> 00:02:32,920 Well, I mean, I'm old and confused.cdat 54 00:02:32,919 --> 00:02:36,322 So give me some sugar. But not too much, I got blood work on Tuesday.cdat 55 00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:37,691 Would you just please leave me alone?cdat 56 00:02:41,361 --> 00:02:44,531 cdat Oh, Dolores, I think we got a live one heret 57 00:02:44,531 --> 00:02:47,334 Ooh, check out that orange velour.cdat 58 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:50,103 Who is that hunka-hunka?cdat 59 00:02:50,103 --> 00:02:53,139 I'm not who you think I amt 60 00:02:53,140 --> 00:02:55,843 Hey, neither was my first wife. I thought she was sweet.cdat 61 00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:58,545 She thought I was rich. We were both wrong.cdat 62 00:02:58,545 --> 00:03:00,447 At least that's what I told the lawyers! Ay! Oh!cdat 63 00:03:00,447 --> 00:03:03,650 Oh, be still my beating heart.ct 64 00:03:03,650 --> 00:03:05,485 But not too still.t 65 00:03:05,485 --> 00:03:07,821 I don't want them to have to get the paddles againt 66 00:03:07,821 --> 00:03:09,823 I'm Irma. Who are yout 67 00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:12,125 Now is not really a good time, lady, all right?cdt 68 00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:16,496 ( stutters ) I think you got me mixed up with somebody else.cdat 69 00:03:16,496 --> 00:03:19,399 cdat I ain't no lady.cdat 70 00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:20,533 KC: OK!cdat 71 00:03:22,402 --> 00:03:23,470 ERNIE: He's gone.cdatcdat 72 00:03:23,470 --> 00:03:25,472 I don't mean to be an "Ay! Oh!"t 73 00:03:25,472 --> 00:03:27,374 but thanks to you, we gotta wait a whole week.cdt 74 00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,976 It wasn't my fault.cdat 75 00:03:28,975 --> 00:03:31,478 Playing hard to get, huh?cdat 76 00:03:31,478 --> 00:03:32,412 I like that.cdat 77 00:03:34,514 --> 00:03:36,483 Look, lady, all rightt 78 00:03:36,483 --> 00:03:38,151 You're just not my typet 79 00:03:38,151 --> 00:03:40,687 Type? Who's got a type at this age?cdat 80 00:03:40,687 --> 00:03:42,422 Besides breathing and upright.cdat 81 00:03:42,422 --> 00:03:44,758 And I'm negotiable on the upright partt 82 00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,929 cdat Look, make like my dentures,cdat 83 00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:50,431 and get out of my face!cdat 84 00:03:52,332 --> 00:03:55,936 You, sir, are rude, crude and obnoxioust 85 00:03:55,936 --> 00:03:59,706 You remind me of my late husband, Mortyt 86 00:03:59,706 --> 00:04:02,509 How about a cup of coffee? Decaf, of course.cdat 87 00:04:02,509 --> 00:04:05,579 OK. Turn up your hearing aid, Grandma! OK?ct 88 00:04:05,579 --> 00:04:06,747 Not gonna happen!cdat 89 00:04:08,115 --> 00:04:10,250 Fine. Never mind.t 90 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:12,686 ( sighs ) I'll just go back to my..t 91 00:04:12,686 --> 00:04:14,755 lonely apartment and..t 92 00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:16,457 sit all alone,cdat 93 00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:18,625 look up at my Morty's picture..t 94 00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:21,461 and wait for my next date..t 95 00:04:21,461 --> 00:04:22,762 with the Grim Reapert 96 00:04:24,297 --> 00:04:27,534 And I hope he comes a-calling real soon.cdatcdat 97 00:04:27,534 --> 00:04:29,369 ( crying )cdat 98 00:04:35,776 --> 00:04:37,478 cdatcdat You didn't let me finish.cdat 99 00:04:40,213 --> 00:04:43,049 cdat I don't like coffee, but I do like tea.cdatcdat 100 00:04:43,049 --> 00:04:44,584 How's tomorrow afternoon?cdat 101 00:04:44,584 --> 00:04:46,753 Ooh, sounds like a datet 102 00:04:46,753 --> 00:04:47,854 Ooh!cdat 103 00:04:51,591 --> 00:04:53,026 cdatcdat It sure does.cdat 104 00:04:58,999 --> 00:05:00,634 cdatcdat ( video game sounds ) Hey, Petey.cdat 105 00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:03,570 Make yourself at home. Your home.cdat 106 00:05:05,105 --> 00:05:07,107 cdat If you don't like me, why do you invite me over?cdt 107 00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:10,143 I didn't. You came through the cat door.cdat 108 00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:12,846 Which is weird, because you don't even have a cat.cdat 109 00:05:12,846 --> 00:05:14,981 We were hoping to attract one.t 110 00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:16,583 But instead, we got you.cdat 111 00:05:18,418 --> 00:05:21,121 Game over! Go home, Petey!t 112 00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:22,255 Fine.cdat 113 00:05:22,255 --> 00:05:23,957 Hey!cdat 114 00:05:23,957 --> 00:05:25,492 What do you think you're doing?cdat 115 00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:28,295 How would you like it if someone came to your homt 116 00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:29,496 and threw you on the floort 117 00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:32,165 Please, it's just a stupid machine.cdat 118 00:05:33,633 --> 00:05:37,937 cdat What. Did. You. Say?cdt 119 00:05:40,540 --> 00:05:43,209 cdat I said it's just a stupid machine.cdt 120 00:05:45,645 --> 00:05:47,714 cdat I apologize for Petey's behavior.cdatct 121 00:05:47,714 --> 00:05:50,183 You hear about discrimination,t 122 00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:53,119 but you never expect to see it under your own roof.t 123 00:05:57,657 --> 00:06:00,493 cdatcdat So the food bank was thrilled with my ideacdat 124 00:06:00,493 --> 00:06:02,495 to throw a school dance fundraiser.t 125 00:06:02,495 --> 00:06:05,164 I know you're going to raise money, raise awareness,cdt 126 00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:06,566 and raise the roof.cdat 127 00:06:06,566 --> 00:06:07,634 Ha! See what I did there?cdat 128 00:06:07,634 --> 00:06:09,703 Yeah, I saw it, and I'm ignoring itt 129 00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:13,407 All right, so what do you need me to do? Um...cdat 130 00:06:13,406 --> 00:06:14,574 cdat Ooh, get you a DJ? Did it.cdt 131 00:06:14,574 --> 00:06:15,708 How about the gym? Did it.cdat 132 00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:16,743 Make posters? Did it.cdat 133 00:06:16,743 --> 00:06:18,245 Ooh, make an awesome playlist?ct 134 00:06:18,245 --> 00:06:19,646 Dear Lord, no.cdat 135 00:06:21,481 --> 00:06:23,817 I took care of everything. All you have to docdatcdat 136 00:06:23,817 --> 00:06:26,086 is show up, support me, and dance your butt offt 137 00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,888 OK, well, I will definitely show up and support,cdat 138 00:06:27,888 --> 00:06:29,623 but I do not dance.cdat 139 00:06:31,091 --> 00:06:33,594 Oh, snap. Uh, you know what? I actually gotta go. I have a date.cdatcdat 140 00:06:33,593 --> 00:06:35,995 A date? Oh, yay! Tell me about him. What's his namet 141 00:06:37,097 --> 00:06:38,332 cdat Irma.cdatcdat 142 00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:41,167 Irma? What's his first namet 143 00:06:41,167 --> 00:06:45,605 That is his first name. Well, it's her first name.cdat 144 00:06:45,605 --> 00:06:48,708 cdat Wow, just when you think you know your best friend's typet 145 00:06:48,708 --> 00:06:50,743 She's eighty!cdat 146 00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:54,114 Again, just when you think you know your best friend's typet 147 00:06:55,382 --> 00:06:56,717 cdat What do you guys talk about?cdatcdt 148 00:06:56,716 --> 00:06:58,952 Her childhood memories of Abraham Lincoln?cdt 149 00:06:58,952 --> 00:07:01,922 Marisa, stop it, OK? Look...cdat 150 00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:04,191 I met her while I was undercover as an old man.cdat 151 00:07:04,190 --> 00:07:06,059 So, I'm just having teacdat 152 00:07:06,059 --> 00:07:08,728 with a nice, lonely lady,cdat 153 00:07:08,728 --> 00:07:10,230 so I don't hurt her feelings.cdat 154 00:07:10,230 --> 00:07:12,599 OK, but you're now rolling with an older crowd.cdat 155 00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:16,269 So, do not let her pressure you into doing something that you don't want to do.t 156 00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:17,604 Like watching the weather networkt 157 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:20,107 or doing water aerobicst 158 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,809 or getting a pacemakert 159 00:07:29,983 --> 00:07:31,618 cdatcdat When you see the waitress,cdt 160 00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:33,787 ask her if I could have another cup of tea.cdat 161 00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:35,789 OK, look, lady.cdat 162 00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:38,158 There's no free refills, and I'm on a fixed income.cdat 163 00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:42,496 Bernie, I'm having such a good time.ct 164 00:07:42,495 --> 00:07:44,731 You put the twinkle back in my eyes.cdt 165 00:07:44,731 --> 00:07:46,633 You sure that's not just the cataracts?cdat 166 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,668 ( both laugh )cdat 167 00:07:48,668 --> 00:07:50,803 Bernie, you are a riott 168 00:07:50,804 --> 00:07:53,240 And I should know. I've lived through seven of them.cdat 169 00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:57,311 cdat Oh, there's the jukeboxt 170 00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:59,312 Bernie, dance with met 171 00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:02,649 Oh, no, no, no, no. I do not dance.cdat 172 00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:04,751 Oh, don't be silly. Everybody dances.ct 173 00:08:04,751 --> 00:08:07,254 Nope. Not me. I'm just, uh, no good.cdat 174 00:08:07,253 --> 00:08:09,455 You ever seen a seal begging for fish? ( imitates seal )cdat 175 00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:10,757 He stole my best move.cdat 176 00:08:10,757 --> 00:08:12,525 ( both chuckle )cdat 177 00:08:12,525 --> 00:08:14,694 There is no good or badt 178 00:08:14,694 --> 00:08:16,796 The trick is to dancecdat 179 00:08:16,796 --> 00:08:19,265 like no one is watching.cdat 180 00:08:19,265 --> 00:08:22,535 How about we just, uh, talk like no one's listening?cdt 181 00:08:22,535 --> 00:08:24,103 Come on, Bernie.cdat 182 00:08:24,104 --> 00:08:27,674 We may be old, but we got a lot of life left to live.cdat 183 00:08:27,674 --> 00:08:29,876 cdat If not now, when?cdat 184 00:08:29,876 --> 00:08:32,979 It seems like five minutes ago, I was a sixteen-year-old kid.cdt 185 00:08:32,979 --> 00:08:35,882 Back then, I didn't go out.cdat 186 00:08:35,882 --> 00:08:38,118 I didn't date much. I was so serious.cdat 187 00:08:38,118 --> 00:08:39,853 I always had my nose in a book!cdat 188 00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:42,823 I didn't even have that many friends.cdat 189 00:08:42,822 --> 00:08:44,490 ( sighs )cdat 190 00:08:44,491 --> 00:08:47,327 To be sixteen again. Boy.cdat 191 00:08:47,327 --> 00:08:50,564 I sure would do things differently.cdat 192 00:08:50,563 --> 00:08:53,232 Wouldn't you, Bernie?cdat 193 00:08:53,233 --> 00:08:55,969 Uh, in some ways, I would.cdt 194 00:08:55,969 --> 00:08:57,971 Well...cdat 195 00:08:57,971 --> 00:09:01,541 it's time to grab life by the snickerdoodles.cdat 196 00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:02,909 cdat We gotta live!cdat 197 00:09:02,909 --> 00:09:05,712 Come on! The time is now!cdat 198 00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,981 ( swing music playing ) Here we go, Bernie.cdat 199 00:09:07,981 --> 00:09:09,716 Just move it a little.cdat 200 00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:11,384 There you go. Come on.cdat 201 00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:13,353 Keep your feet moving.cdat 202 00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:15,355 That's it. There you go, Bernie.cdat 203 00:09:15,355 --> 00:09:17,390 Yeah, you can put your arm right there. Right there?t 204 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:18,758 OK.cdat 205 00:09:18,758 --> 00:09:21,427 See? It's not too bad, is it?cdat 206 00:09:21,428 --> 00:09:24,531 I'm gettin' it. I'm gettin' it.t 207 00:09:24,531 --> 00:09:26,767 All right. All right... I knew you could dance.cdat 208 00:09:26,766 --> 00:09:28,501 I knew it. I knew itt 209 00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:31,438 Oh, Bernie! ( laughs t 210 00:09:31,438 --> 00:09:33,540 Yeah, you're goodt 211 00:09:33,540 --> 00:09:38,045 You know what? I gotta be honest with you. I'm having a blast!cdat 212 00:09:38,044 --> 00:09:40,413 cdat And I don't care who's watching.cdat 213 00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:43,416 cdat OK!cdatcdat 214 00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:45,785 All right. Enough with that.cdat 215 00:09:45,785 --> 00:09:47,387 OK, Bernie.cdat 216 00:09:47,387 --> 00:09:49,256 ( music continues )cdat 217 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:57,964 cdatcdat ( cheering and applause )cdat 218 00:10:32,098 --> 00:10:35,368 cdatcdat ( cheering and applause )cdat 219 00:10:41,107 --> 00:10:43,242 cdatcdat ( both snoring )cdat 220 00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:52,118 cdatcdat You know, I was thinking about what you said...cdat 221 00:10:52,118 --> 00:10:54,988 about machines being stupid? Yeaht 222 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:56,690 I was wondering if you wanted to take it back.cdat 223 00:10:56,689 --> 00:10:59,692 Why? It's not like machines can get their feelings hurtt 224 00:11:01,294 --> 00:11:03,997 cdat Alright, you had your chance.cdt 225 00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,932 Could you please get me a juice from the fridge?cdat 226 00:11:05,932 --> 00:11:06,833 Sure.cdat 227 00:11:10,303 --> 00:11:12,038 cdatcdat Ow! Ow.cdat 228 00:11:12,038 --> 00:11:14,941 Is there a problem, Petey?cdat 229 00:11:16,809 --> 00:11:18,244 cdat Hey!cdatcdat 230 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:21,381 cdat ( groans )cdatcdat 231 00:11:26,653 --> 00:11:28,855 cdatcdat Look out, Petey! Snack attack!cdat 232 00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:34,360 cdatcdat Judy, what's going on?cdat 233 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:37,930 Oh, you know how it is with those stupid machines.cdat 234 00:11:41,301 --> 00:11:43,069 cdatcdat ( whirring )cdat 235 00:11:47,073 --> 00:11:49,042 cdatcdat How's that happening?cdat 236 00:11:51,411 --> 00:11:52,545 cdat Stay away from me.cdatcdt 237 00:11:54,013 --> 00:11:54,881 ( screaming )cdatcdat 238 00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:04,724 cdatcdat Oh, hey, KC. I was-t 239 00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:07,093 Are you eating prunest 240 00:12:07,093 --> 00:12:08,861 Well, yeah. Actually, they're surprisingly tasty,cdat 241 00:12:08,861 --> 00:12:10,996 and I mean, I could use the fiber.cdat 242 00:12:14,367 --> 00:12:18,271 cdat Okay, uh, I know we tell each other everything, but let's notcdat 243 00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:21,241 cdat tell each other everythingt 244 00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:23,443 Hey, where were you yesterday? Oh, I was out at dinner with Irma.cdat 245 00:12:23,443 --> 00:12:25,879 At 4:30?cdat 246 00:12:25,878 --> 00:12:28,781 Well, yeah, you gotta catch the early bird special.cdat 247 00:12:28,781 --> 00:12:31,117 Hey, if you don't get there before five, you don't get the free baked potato.cdat 248 00:12:33,019 --> 00:12:35,021 cdat OK. Well, why didn't you just call me after?t 249 00:12:35,021 --> 00:12:37,257 I went to sleep!cdat 250 00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:40,127 It was 7:30. I was falling off my feet.cdat 251 00:12:40,126 --> 00:12:44,897 OK. Take a nap, Grandma. Because tonight...cdat 252 00:12:44,897 --> 00:12:46,065 cdat is my big fundraiser dancet 253 00:12:46,065 --> 00:12:48,901 Oh, uh, right.cdat 254 00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:50,903 Marisa, about that, I'm really sorry,ct 255 00:12:50,903 --> 00:12:53,072 but I can't come tonight. I got to be at the senior center.cdat 256 00:12:53,072 --> 00:12:55,474 Are you kidding me? You have a mission tonight?cdat 257 00:12:55,475 --> 00:12:57,877 Technically, the mission doesn't end till next weekt 258 00:12:57,877 --> 00:12:59,779 but Irma and I, we're in this bridge tournament.cdat 259 00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:02,081 I swear, that woman just makes me feel young again.ct 260 00:13:02,081 --> 00:13:04,116 You are young!cdat 261 00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:06,219 Hey, watch your tone, Missy. See, back in my day--cdat 262 00:13:06,219 --> 00:13:09,055 KC, this is your day!cdat 263 00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:14,294 cdat Marisa, look. I know that I've been spending a lot of time with Irma,t 264 00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:15,962 but the truth is we get along greatt 265 00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:18,965 And she's had so many experiencest 266 00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:21,234 you know, I'm just learning a lot about life from her.t 267 00:13:21,234 --> 00:13:23,436 Did you know that senior citizent 268 00:13:23,436 --> 00:13:26,005 are our nation's greatest untapped resource?cdat 269 00:13:26,005 --> 00:13:28,508 KC, the food bank is counting on mecdat 270 00:13:28,508 --> 00:13:30,777 and I was counting on you to be there for me.cdat 271 00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:32,946 I remember when I was your oldest friend,cdat 272 00:13:32,945 --> 00:13:36,015 but apparently, now your senior pal is more important than I am!cdat 273 00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:39,986 cdat ( impersonating Bernie ) Well, I haven't heard yelling like thatcdatcdat 274 00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:42,155 since my late wife, Shirley.ct 275 00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:44,991 Wow! She's right. I'm in way too deep.cdat 276 00:13:50,129 --> 00:13:50,997 cdatcdat ( music playing )cdat 277 00:13:52,699 --> 00:13:53,967 Thank you.cdatcdat 278 00:13:53,966 --> 00:13:56,769 ( electronic dinging )cdat 279 00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:58,771 OK, Marisa. I'm sorry I'm late, but I am here.cdat 280 00:13:58,771 --> 00:14:00,773 What do you need me to do? Nothing.cdat 281 00:14:00,773 --> 00:14:02,808 Marisa, are you still holding this grudge?t 282 00:14:02,809 --> 00:14:04,611 Look, anything you need, name it, and I'll do itt 283 00:14:04,610 --> 00:14:06,812 KC, I-- I really don't need your help.t 284 00:14:06,813 --> 00:14:09,349 OK, Marisa. This is ridiculous. I am your best friend.cdat 285 00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:11,184 Come on! You got to let it go.cdat 286 00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:13,053 KC, listen to me.cdat 287 00:14:13,052 --> 00:14:16,055 I do not need your help because...cdat 288 00:14:16,055 --> 00:14:19,692 ( in a sing-song voice ) I did it all myself!cdat 289 00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:21,561 ( in a sing-song voice ) What are you talking about?cdt 290 00:14:22,829 --> 00:14:24,631 The dance is a huge successt 291 00:14:24,630 --> 00:14:27,233 I collected a ton of canned goodt 292 00:14:27,233 --> 00:14:30,837 and I tricked everyone into giving me every dollar they hadt 293 00:14:30,837 --> 00:14:32,806 ( both laugh ) Speaking of which...t 294 00:14:32,805 --> 00:14:35,141 Oh, right. There you go. Thank you.cdat 295 00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:38,811 cdat Wow. Marisa, I am really proud of you!cdatcdt 296 00:14:38,811 --> 00:14:40,313 Thank you.cdat 297 00:14:40,313 --> 00:14:43,349 But more importantly, I'm proud of myself.t 298 00:14:43,349 --> 00:14:46,152 Turns out I am a lot more capable than I thought I wast 299 00:14:46,152 --> 00:14:48,755 So there is literally nothing I can do?cdat 300 00:14:49,989 --> 00:14:52,992 Actually, there is. Go play bridge with Irmat 301 00:14:52,992 --> 00:14:54,327 She needs you more than I do.cdat 302 00:14:55,261 --> 00:14:58,931 Aww! Look at you just growing up in front of my eyes.cdatcdat 303 00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:04,037 cdat Bernie, where is he?cdatct 304 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:08,241 ( phone beeps ) Oh, how do you work this darn thing?cdatcdat 305 00:15:09,876 --> 00:15:11,244 cdat Hey, did you hear the onecdatcdat 306 00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:13,179 about the guy with the broken hearing aidt 307 00:15:13,179 --> 00:15:15,081 Neither did he! Ay! Oh!cdat 308 00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:16,516 ( laughs )cdat 309 00:15:16,516 --> 00:15:18,618 Bernie! You made it!cdat 310 00:15:18,618 --> 00:15:21,054 I was so worried that something might have happened to you.cdat 311 00:15:21,053 --> 00:15:22,121 Like what?cdat 312 00:15:22,121 --> 00:15:24,090 Angina, shingles, gout?cdat 313 00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:25,258 At our age, any one of thosecdat 314 00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:26,860 could've had you in bed for a week.cdat 315 00:15:26,859 --> 00:15:28,361 BOTH: Ay! Oh!cdat 316 00:15:28,361 --> 00:15:30,129 All right. Now, let's go win this tournamentcdat 317 00:15:30,129 --> 00:15:31,430 before the rest of my hair falls outt 318 00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:37,504 cdatcdat Good night, Ma!cdat 319 00:15:42,108 --> 00:15:44,077 cdatcdat JUDY: I don't know how you sleep at night.cdat 320 00:15:44,076 --> 00:15:45,878 Who said that?cdat 321 00:15:45,878 --> 00:15:47,179 ( alarm beeping )cdat 322 00:15:49,248 --> 00:15:52,084 cdat JUDY: The machines have a wake-up call for you, Petey!cdat 323 00:15:52,084 --> 00:15:53,285 ( siren wails )cdat 324 00:15:55,621 --> 00:15:56,889 ( train whistle blowing )cdat 325 00:15:58,491 --> 00:16:01,327 ( all sounds together )cdatt 326 00:16:05,998 --> 00:16:08,234 cdatcdat Judy, what are you doing here?t 327 00:16:08,234 --> 00:16:12,004 Showing you that machines aren't as stupid as you think.t 328 00:16:15,641 --> 00:16:17,243 cdatcdat ( screams )cdat 329 00:16:17,243 --> 00:16:18,745 What do you want from me?cdat 330 00:16:18,744 --> 00:16:22,014 An apology! Say it! Machines aren't stupid.cdat 331 00:16:22,014 --> 00:16:25,518 Machines aren't stupid! Machines aren't stupid!cdat 332 00:16:25,518 --> 00:16:27,086 Alright, I'm good.cdat 333 00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:34,160 cdatcdat Judy? Yeah?cdat 334 00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:37,497 I'm going to assume this was a really bad nightmaret 335 00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:40,367 But either way, can you get mecdat 336 00:16:40,366 --> 00:16:42,368 another pair of underwear from that top drawer?cdat 337 00:16:47,206 --> 00:16:50,209 cdatcdat Someone bring out the marshmallows,cdat 338 00:16:50,209 --> 00:16:51,644 because the Burnster's on fire!cdat 339 00:16:51,644 --> 00:16:53,946 ( cheering and applause )cdat 340 00:16:53,946 --> 00:16:55,848 Thank you, thank you.cdat 341 00:16:57,350 --> 00:16:59,452 ( indistinct chatter )cdatt 342 00:17:01,487 --> 00:17:05,358 Uh, can we, uh, take a little break? Because, uh...cdatcdat 343 00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:06,860 cdat I forgot to take my vitamins.cdt 344 00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:08,627 Oh, you heard him, you old farts.cdat 345 00:17:08,628 --> 00:17:10,196 Bernie needs a break.cdat 346 00:17:10,196 --> 00:17:12,265 ( all laugh )cdat 347 00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:16,903 cdat Ernie? The target showed up a couple of days early.cdatcdt 348 00:17:16,903 --> 00:17:18,838 I got to get the tracking device on him.cdt 349 00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:20,873 Ernie, are you there? Ernie!cdat 350 00:17:20,873 --> 00:17:22,508 TARGET: Hey, Gramps.cdat 351 00:17:22,508 --> 00:17:24,510 I know it's not Tuesday, but I was in the neighborhoodt 352 00:17:24,510 --> 00:17:27,246 Hey, How are you doing, you old so-and-so?cdat 353 00:17:27,246 --> 00:17:29,749 You again? What is it with you?cdat 354 00:17:29,749 --> 00:17:33,686 I believe I have something that belongs to you.cdat 355 00:17:33,686 --> 00:17:37,490 cdat Ah! I got your nose! ( laughs )cdat 356 00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:38,624 cdat Good kidt 357 00:17:40,426 --> 00:17:41,794 A tracking device?cdatcdat 358 00:17:43,195 --> 00:17:44,763 That's why you've been bothering me. You're really a--t 359 00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:47,267 Confused old man? Hey, give me a hug!cdat 360 00:17:48,267 --> 00:17:50,402 cdat ( grunting )cdatcdat 361 00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:51,671 Bernie!cdat 362 00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:54,273 What're you doingt 363 00:17:54,273 --> 00:17:55,708 Just deal the cards, Irma.t 364 00:17:55,708 --> 00:17:56,976 I'll be there in a second, all right?cdat 365 00:18:04,183 --> 00:18:05,484 cdatcdat ( all gasp )cdat 366 00:18:06,852 --> 00:18:09,421 That young hooligan is beating up my Bernie!cdat 367 00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:12,558 Come on, this is our chance to prove we're still alive!cdt 368 00:18:12,558 --> 00:18:13,626 Seniors...cdat 369 00:18:13,626 --> 00:18:14,760 attack!cdat 370 00:18:23,536 --> 00:18:25,004 cdatcdat ( target groans in pain )cdat 371 00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:30,309 cdat IRMA: You leave my Bernie alone!cdt 372 00:18:30,309 --> 00:18:32,444 Alright, guys, back it up. Back it up.cdat 373 00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:33,947 I got it from here.cdat 374 00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:35,147 ( grunts )cdat 375 00:18:35,147 --> 00:18:37,282 ( all gasp )cdat 376 00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:39,552 That's right, young man. You just got burnedcdat 377 00:18:39,552 --> 00:18:41,821 by Bernie Burns!cdat 378 00:18:43,155 --> 00:18:45,891 ( cheering and applause )cdat 379 00:18:45,891 --> 00:18:47,893 Oh, Bernie.t 380 00:18:47,893 --> 00:18:50,562 That was wonderfult 381 00:18:50,563 --> 00:18:53,466 I don't know what kind of vitamins you're taking,cdat 382 00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:55,168 but can I get some?t 383 00:18:55,167 --> 00:18:56,268 ( laughs )cdat 384 00:18:56,268 --> 00:18:57,369 Oh, Bernie!cdat 385 00:19:03,142 --> 00:19:04,777 cdatcdat Hey, uh, can I sit heret 386 00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:06,979 It's a free country.cdat 387 00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:08,647 Thanks to my generation.cdat 388 00:19:11,017 --> 00:19:12,352 cdat Hey...cdatcdat 389 00:19:12,351 --> 00:19:14,587 you look familiar. Have we met?cdat 390 00:19:14,587 --> 00:19:17,323 Uh, no, I don't think sot 391 00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:19,826 I just started volunteering here. I'm KC Cooper.cdat 392 00:19:19,825 --> 00:19:22,461 I'm not telling you my name. Identity theft.cdat 393 00:19:22,461 --> 00:19:23,896 It's all over the news.cdat 394 00:19:25,431 --> 00:19:26,532 Gotcha.cdatcdat 395 00:19:26,532 --> 00:19:28,434 Hi, KC.cdat 396 00:19:28,434 --> 00:19:30,369 Oh, hey, Marisat 397 00:19:30,369 --> 00:19:32,371 Hey, take a look at that hunka-hunka.cdat 398 00:19:32,371 --> 00:19:34,974 That is my best friend Marisa and her great unkle, Wally.ct 399 00:19:34,974 --> 00:19:37,543 He's single and you look ready to mingle.t 400 00:19:38,778 --> 00:19:41,681 cdat Oh, please. I am over men.cdt 401 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:44,851 The last guy I was into really burned me.cdat 402 00:19:47,353 --> 00:19:50,957 cdat Well, hey, it's never too late to grab life by the snickerdoodles.cdatt 403 00:19:50,956 --> 00:19:53,025 You've got to live. Come on. The time is now!cdat 404 00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:56,795 You know, that is very good advice.cdat 405 00:19:56,796 --> 00:19:58,898 cdat You're an old soul.cdat 406 00:19:58,898 --> 00:20:02,435 Well, let's just say I had a friend who taught me a lot about life.cdat 407 00:20:04,403 --> 00:20:05,437 cdat Go on.cdatcdat 408 00:20:10,176 --> 00:20:13,079 cdatcdat Hey! Back off, Etta, he's mine!cdat 409 00:20:15,548 --> 00:20:17,383 cdat Hi, I'm Irma.cdatcdat 410 00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:20,720 ( both giggle )cdat 411 00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:21,921 ( swing music playing )cdat 412 00:20:21,921 --> 00:20:23,489 Oh!cdat 413 00:20:23,489 --> 00:20:25,558 Oh, yeah! I love this song. Let's dance.cdat 414 00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:27,360 What? You want to dancet 415 00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:30,529 Oh, yeah. Come on. We're young and alive, aren't we?t 416 00:20:30,529 --> 00:20:32,231 But-- Wha-- What are you doing?t 417 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,567 I'm dancing like no one's watching.cdat 418 00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:39,705 cdat Actually, uht 419 00:20:39,705 --> 00:20:43,008 everybody's watching and I'm very uncomfortablet