1 00:00:09,275 --> 00:00:10,858 Oh, thank you. 2 00:00:10,858 --> 00:00:12,192 Thank you. 3 00:00:13,858 --> 00:00:16,192 What in the Queen Latifah is goin' on? 4 00:00:16,192 --> 00:00:20,358 Oh, just reliving my days at the Cotillion Ball. 5 00:00:20,358 --> 00:00:22,108 Cotillion Bowl? 6 00:00:22,108 --> 00:00:23,775 I didn't know you played football in college. 7 00:00:23,775 --> 00:00:25,983 Cotillion Ball. 8 00:00:25,983 --> 00:00:28,983 It's a girl's proper introduction to society. 9 00:00:28,983 --> 00:00:30,442 Look. 10 00:00:30,442 --> 00:00:31,983 This is the dress I wore 11 00:00:31,983 --> 00:00:34,233 - when I won Miss Debutante. - Aww. 12 00:00:34,233 --> 00:00:36,025 Your grandma and your great-grandma wore it 13 00:00:36,025 --> 00:00:37,942 - when they won, too. - Aww. 14 00:00:37,942 --> 00:00:39,983 And now, KC'll wear it to the ball. 15 00:00:39,983 --> 00:00:42,650 Uh-uh! 16 00:00:42,650 --> 00:00:44,525 Have you ever met KC? 17 00:00:44,525 --> 00:00:46,150 Have you ever met your mama? 18 00:00:46,150 --> 00:00:48,983 I have my ways. 19 00:00:48,983 --> 00:00:53,858 This is gonna be the best mother-daughter bonding experience ever... 20 00:00:53,858 --> 00:00:55,442 whether she likes it or not. 21 00:00:59,442 --> 00:01:01,233 Oh, honey, pack your bags. 22 00:01:01,233 --> 00:01:03,775 Your dad is on a mission, and you and I are going 23 00:01:03,775 --> 00:01:05,692 to Chesapeake for the Cotillion Ball. 24 00:01:05,692 --> 00:01:09,025 Are we also gonna make a pit stop at Fantasyland, 25 00:01:09,025 --> 00:01:10,650 because that's never gonna happen. 26 00:01:10,650 --> 00:01:12,900 I know. 27 00:01:12,900 --> 00:01:14,733 Who wants to wear a big ol' gown 28 00:01:14,733 --> 00:01:16,108 and get their hair all did? 29 00:01:16,108 --> 00:01:17,817 - Not me. - Me either. 30 00:01:17,817 --> 00:01:20,025 I mean, it's not like we have to take every mission 31 00:01:20,025 --> 00:01:21,108 they throw our way. 32 00:01:21,108 --> 00:01:23,025 Wait a minute, it's a mission? 33 00:01:23,025 --> 00:01:24,733 Eh, don't worry about it. 34 00:01:24,733 --> 00:01:26,983 Of course, they'll bump us down in seniority, 35 00:01:26,983 --> 00:01:28,025 but who cares? 36 00:01:28,025 --> 00:01:30,442 I care. I care a lot. 37 00:01:30,442 --> 00:01:32,108 Mom, I think we should go. 38 00:01:32,108 --> 00:01:33,650 It's okay, KC. 39 00:01:33,650 --> 00:01:35,775 To be honest, I've really lost interest. 40 00:01:35,775 --> 00:01:38,025 Well, get interested. I'm gonna go pack my bags. 41 00:01:38,025 --> 00:01:40,150 We are going to that cotillion. 42 00:01:40,150 --> 00:01:43,358 - Well, fine, if you insist. - I do. 43 00:01:47,150 --> 00:01:50,942 Oh, Kira, you're so good... 44 00:01:50,942 --> 00:01:52,692 at bein' bad. 45 00:01:54,733 --> 00:01:58,108 ♪ Oh, when danger comes for you ♪ 46 00:01:58,108 --> 00:02:01,150 ♪ You know I'll stand beside you ♪ 47 00:02:01,150 --> 00:02:05,067 ♪ 'Cause ain't nobody keep things hustle cool ♪ 48 00:02:05,067 --> 00:02:09,358 ♪ I'll always find a way, a way out of the fire ♪ 49 00:02:09,358 --> 00:02:13,400 ♪ Don't tell nobody, tell nobody ♪ 50 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,192 ♪ I'm not perfect ♪ 51 00:02:15,192 --> 00:02:19,192 ♪ So many things I wanna tell you ♪ 52 00:02:19,192 --> 00:02:23,192 ♪ But I, I, I, I keep it undercover ♪ 53 00:02:23,192 --> 00:02:25,192 ♪ Livin' my life, no way to learn ♪ 54 00:02:25,192 --> 00:02:27,400 ♪ Doin' my thing, gonna make it work ♪ 55 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:30,067 ♪ Know I'm the realest, baby, I'm fearless ♪ 56 00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:32,150 ♪ But I always got your back ♪ 57 00:02:32,150 --> 00:02:33,983 ♪ Nobody can do it like I can ♪ 58 00:02:33,983 --> 00:02:35,942 ♪ I gotta find out who I am ♪ 59 00:02:35,942 --> 00:02:38,900 ♪ Ain't got to worry about me ♪ 60 00:02:38,900 --> 00:02:40,192 ♪ It's all part of the plan ♪ 61 00:02:40,192 --> 00:02:42,525 I keep it undercover. 62 00:02:42,525 --> 00:02:43,900 I keep it undercover. 63 00:02:46,942 --> 00:02:50,567 Good afternoon, and salutations. 64 00:02:50,567 --> 00:02:54,067 I am Miss Holley of the Arlington Holleys. 65 00:02:54,067 --> 00:02:57,733 You may recognize me from the picture on my book 66 00:02:57,733 --> 00:03:00,275 If you don't, Excuse You: 67 00:03:00,275 --> 00:03:03,275 Living A Life of Elegance and Class 68 00:03:03,275 --> 00:03:05,275 is available for purchase in the lobby. 69 00:03:05,275 --> 00:03:07,067 Cash only. 70 00:03:13,025 --> 00:03:13,983 You're late. 71 00:03:13,983 --> 00:03:15,483 I'm sorry, okay? 72 00:03:15,483 --> 00:03:16,942 It took me a while to zip up. 73 00:03:16,942 --> 00:03:20,025 Thankfully, I was able to pop my shoulder back in. 74 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,275 Welcome to the 104th annual 75 00:03:24,275 --> 00:03:26,442 mother-daughter debutante tea. 76 00:03:26,442 --> 00:03:29,483 What a resplendent group of young ladies. 77 00:03:29,483 --> 00:03:31,150 And the daughters aren't half bad either. 78 00:03:32,650 --> 00:03:35,233 Elbows! 79 00:03:37,108 --> 00:03:41,733 What? You have to fit in for the mission. 80 00:03:41,733 --> 00:03:43,608 And what exactly is this mission-- 81 00:03:43,608 --> 00:03:45,442 to set feminism back 100 years? 82 00:03:45,442 --> 00:03:47,817 Well, Gladys, our new handler, 83 00:03:47,817 --> 00:03:49,233 isn't big on details. 84 00:03:49,233 --> 00:03:50,983 But look around you. 85 00:03:50,983 --> 00:03:54,233 This place is filled with VIP's. 86 00:03:54,233 --> 00:03:57,650 Over there, ambassador's daughter. 87 00:03:57,650 --> 00:04:00,025 And there, governor's daughter. 88 00:04:00,025 --> 00:04:02,483 And Ms. Mega-bucks over there, 89 00:04:02,483 --> 00:04:05,108 well, her family makes the strings 90 00:04:05,108 --> 00:04:07,150 for 90% of all the teabags. 91 00:04:07,150 --> 00:04:09,025 Wait, so what I'm hearin' is, 92 00:04:09,025 --> 00:04:13,358 she's a chamo-millionaire. 93 00:04:13,358 --> 00:04:16,483 Hey! My arm wasn't even on the table that time. 94 00:04:18,108 --> 00:04:21,150 And before we crown our Miss Debutante, 95 00:04:21,150 --> 00:04:24,817 our beaus will present our ladies to society, 96 00:04:24,817 --> 00:04:27,775 and they are handsome. 97 00:04:27,775 --> 00:04:30,358 Why, if I were just 40 years younger, 98 00:04:30,358 --> 00:04:33,150 I'd still be a tad too old for them. 99 00:04:33,150 --> 00:04:34,900 And now, ladies, 100 00:04:34,900 --> 00:04:37,525 please join me for the walkabout. 101 00:04:39,358 --> 00:04:41,858 Mom, what exactly is the point of this? 102 00:04:41,858 --> 00:04:43,858 Why can't we just do a... 103 00:04:43,858 --> 00:04:46,067 chill-about, or a get-your-grub-on-about? 104 00:04:46,067 --> 00:04:49,483 Well, if I had to guess, 105 00:04:49,483 --> 00:04:51,900 it's a way to demonstrate a young lady's posture 106 00:04:51,900 --> 00:04:53,942 and elegance and grace. 107 00:04:53,942 --> 00:04:56,025 They call it PEG. 108 00:04:56,025 --> 00:04:58,025 I think. I don't know. STYLE ::cue() 109 00:05:03,108 --> 00:05:04,275 Oh, hey, Judy. 110 00:05:04,275 --> 00:05:06,608 Be a doll and get me a glass of milk. 111 00:05:06,608 --> 00:05:09,400 After that, you can have an hour of TV, then lights out. 112 00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:12,983 - Aw, did you enjoy it? - Enjoy what? 113 00:05:12,983 --> 00:05:15,900 Your five seconds of thinking you are the boss of me. 114 00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:18,025 I'm in charge. 115 00:05:18,025 --> 00:05:20,358 Put that in your glass of milk and drink it. 116 00:05:21,900 --> 00:05:24,358 Slow your roll, chips for brains. 117 00:05:24,358 --> 00:05:27,858 What makes you think you're in charge? 118 00:05:27,858 --> 00:05:29,650 Let's see. Agent Kira left me 119 00:05:29,650 --> 00:05:32,317 all the emergency contact information, 120 00:05:32,317 --> 00:05:34,108 a list of your allergies, 121 00:05:34,108 --> 00:05:36,317 and, oh yeah, she said, "Judy, you're in charge." 122 00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:49,192 [loud belch] 123 00:05:52,900 --> 00:05:54,858 If there's a belching competition, 124 00:05:54,858 --> 00:05:57,108 you're definitely a shoo-in. 125 00:05:57,108 --> 00:05:57,983 I'm KC. 126 00:05:57,983 --> 00:06:01,067 What's good, yo? Kiki. 127 00:06:01,067 --> 00:06:03,233 Well, here they call me Kitten. 128 00:06:03,233 --> 00:06:05,025 I'm not really feelin' this whole high society, 129 00:06:05,025 --> 00:06:06,983 sip-your-tea-proper type situation. 130 00:06:06,983 --> 00:06:10,650 Really? Your army boots didn't give that away at all. 131 00:06:10,650 --> 00:06:12,317 I have to do it. 132 00:06:12,317 --> 00:06:13,900 I got four gene-ray-rays up in this piece, you feel me? 133 00:06:13,900 --> 00:06:15,692 I got my moms, my grandmoms, 134 00:06:15,692 --> 00:06:17,400 my great-grandmoms. 135 00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,067 We call her Mom-Moms. 136 00:06:19,067 --> 00:06:22,108 Isn't that technically your mom-mom's mom? 137 00:06:24,358 --> 00:06:25,442 Ladies. 138 00:06:27,275 --> 00:06:29,483 Ma'am, I was just telling KC about 139 00:06:29,483 --> 00:06:31,692 my amazing journey to Africa 140 00:06:31,692 --> 00:06:33,858 to dig wells in order to provide clean water 141 00:06:33,858 --> 00:06:35,983 to local villages. 142 00:06:35,983 --> 00:06:38,317 You are an angel, Kitten. 143 00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:41,817 Is that young lady... [horrified gasp] 144 00:06:41,817 --> 00:06:44,192 She is chewin' gum! 145 00:06:44,192 --> 00:06:48,025 Young lady, chompin' your cud is barnyard behavior. 146 00:06:48,025 --> 00:06:51,275 Uh... is it just me, 147 00:06:51,275 --> 00:06:54,483 or did you just go all British up in this piece, yo? 148 00:06:54,483 --> 00:06:57,400 My moms bribed me with new wheels to get me here, 149 00:06:57,400 --> 00:07:00,108 so I gotta flex my lady skills, know what I'm sayin'? 150 00:07:00,108 --> 00:07:02,025 Yeah, I know... 151 00:07:02,025 --> 00:07:04,150 Yeah, I know what you... 152 00:07:04,150 --> 00:07:06,025 I feel you. 153 00:07:07,942 --> 00:07:10,650 Would you excuse me for a second? 154 00:07:15,775 --> 00:07:18,150 Yo, Moms... I mean, Mother, uh... 155 00:07:20,108 --> 00:07:21,983 I think our mission has to do with that tea-string heiress. 156 00:07:21,983 --> 00:07:23,983 See that diamond necklace around her neck? 157 00:07:23,983 --> 00:07:26,108 I think we're here to stop a robbery. 158 00:07:26,108 --> 00:07:30,775 Well, it is like you are reading my emails. 159 00:07:30,775 --> 00:07:33,817 Gladys just told me to watch her like a hawk. 160 00:07:33,817 --> 00:07:36,567 Watch her style and grace. 161 00:07:36,567 --> 00:07:38,483 The way she holds her teacup, 162 00:07:38,483 --> 00:07:40,733 now, see, that is a perfect pinky. 163 00:07:40,733 --> 00:07:44,067 Why exactly would I care about that stuff? 164 00:07:44,067 --> 00:07:48,067 Oh, did I mention the rest of the email? 165 00:07:48,067 --> 00:07:49,358 Gladys said you have to win Miss Debutante. 166 00:07:49,358 --> 00:07:52,650 What? Why? 167 00:07:52,650 --> 00:07:54,067 Why? Who knows why? 168 00:07:54,067 --> 00:07:55,608 Do I know why? I don't know why. 169 00:07:56,858 --> 00:08:00,108 But I do know that my job is to follow orders. 170 00:08:00,108 --> 00:08:02,983 Wait, Mom, so you really expect me to win this thing? 171 00:08:02,983 --> 00:08:06,400 Well, they'd probably settle for second place. 172 00:08:10,942 --> 00:08:13,067 And we're curtsying. 173 00:08:13,067 --> 00:08:15,608 And curtsying. 174 00:08:15,608 --> 00:08:18,608 And curtsying. 175 00:08:18,608 --> 00:08:19,942 Well, some of you are. 176 00:08:19,942 --> 00:08:22,067 Some of you look like a dizzy flamingo. 177 00:08:23,983 --> 00:08:25,275 Now remember, ladies, 178 00:08:25,275 --> 00:08:27,025 if you wish to have the perfect curtsy, 179 00:08:27,025 --> 00:08:29,983 my DVD, Perfect Curtsying, 180 00:08:29,983 --> 00:08:32,858 is available in the lobby. 181 00:08:32,858 --> 00:08:34,858 - Cash only. - Cash only. 182 00:08:38,483 --> 00:08:40,858 Isn't this the most fun we've ever had? 183 00:08:40,858 --> 00:08:43,025 You know, on a mission. 184 00:08:43,025 --> 00:08:46,192 Yeah, we're havin' a blast. 185 00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:48,358 I have an idea how I can win that title. 186 00:08:48,358 --> 00:08:50,567 Lay it on me, baby. I'm here to support you. 187 00:08:50,567 --> 00:08:52,067 If I'm gonna win, 188 00:08:52,067 --> 00:08:53,692 I need someone really good in my corner 189 00:08:53,692 --> 00:08:55,358 with hair, makeup, wardrobe. 190 00:08:55,358 --> 00:08:57,442 You don't have to ask me twice. 191 00:08:57,442 --> 00:09:00,025 Yeah, I wasn't gonna even ask you once. 192 00:09:01,567 --> 00:09:03,775 I think she meant me. 193 00:09:06,233 --> 00:09:08,733 Mom, can you believe that Marisa got here on such short notice? 194 00:09:08,733 --> 00:09:12,108 No. No, I cannot. 195 00:09:12,108 --> 00:09:12,942 What is she doing here? 196 00:09:12,942 --> 00:09:15,150 Well, she's my glam squad. 197 00:09:15,150 --> 00:09:18,108 Who better to take me from blah to ♪ Ah! ♪ 198 00:09:18,108 --> 00:09:19,942 Oh, I don't know. 199 00:09:19,942 --> 00:09:21,817 Maybe your ma. 200 00:09:21,817 --> 00:09:23,983 I can't believe you asked her here. 201 00:09:23,983 --> 00:09:25,983 Well, thank you, Mrs. Cooper, 202 00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:28,442 and here I was wondering if taking three buses, 203 00:09:28,442 --> 00:09:29,942 two trains and running half a mile to get here 204 00:09:29,942 --> 00:09:32,067 was worth it. 205 00:09:32,067 --> 00:09:34,942 I'll just go grab the rest of my stuff. 206 00:09:34,942 --> 00:09:37,150 Don't worry. I don't need a hand. 207 00:09:38,900 --> 00:09:40,567 KC, what is wrong with you? 208 00:09:40,567 --> 00:09:42,900 What is wrong with me? What is wrong with you? 209 00:09:42,900 --> 00:09:45,067 Our cover is mother and daughter, 210 00:09:45,067 --> 00:09:46,900 not mother, daughter, and some friend of yours 211 00:09:46,900 --> 00:09:49,025 who doesn't belong here but for some reason is. 212 00:09:49,025 --> 00:09:51,358 Mom, relax, okay? As far as Marisa knows, 213 00:09:51,358 --> 00:09:52,942 we are just bonding at a cotillion 214 00:09:52,942 --> 00:09:54,817 that you forced me to go to, okay, 215 00:09:54,817 --> 00:09:56,275 but we both know the truth. 216 00:09:58,483 --> 00:10:00,192 Well, one of us does. STYLE ::cue() 217 00:10:11,150 --> 00:10:13,567 Okay, I know you think Marisa is some makeup genius, 218 00:10:13,567 --> 00:10:15,942 but honestly, I have never seen you look worse. 219 00:10:15,942 --> 00:10:18,942 Seriously, you look horrible. 220 00:10:18,942 --> 00:10:21,733 She hasn't put any makeup on me yet. 221 00:10:23,317 --> 00:10:26,025 So far, it's just the face you gave her. 222 00:10:28,483 --> 00:10:31,317 Girl, you are on thin ice. 223 00:10:33,817 --> 00:10:36,317 And this is the dress I brought you. 224 00:10:36,317 --> 00:10:38,275 Oh, no. 225 00:10:38,275 --> 00:10:40,567 What happened to the dress I brought you? 226 00:10:40,567 --> 00:10:42,942 Well, I've heard of polka dots. 227 00:10:42,942 --> 00:10:46,275 I never really heard of polka holes. 228 00:10:46,275 --> 00:10:48,317 Oh, look at that. 229 00:10:48,317 --> 00:10:51,108 I guess moths must have gotten to it. 230 00:10:51,900 --> 00:10:53,983 It's a rookie mistake. 231 00:10:53,983 --> 00:10:56,108 You should've packed it like I packed this one-- 232 00:10:56,108 --> 00:10:58,942 in cedar cellophane, oh, and love. 233 00:11:03,650 --> 00:11:06,150 Almost 100 years old. 234 00:11:06,150 --> 00:11:08,775 It looks like the day it was sewn together. 235 00:11:08,775 --> 00:11:10,233 You know what? Fine. 236 00:11:10,233 --> 00:11:11,942 This dress will actually be perfect 237 00:11:11,942 --> 00:11:14,108 for that party I'm going to next week. 238 00:11:14,108 --> 00:11:17,025 after I make a few more holes. 239 00:11:17,025 --> 00:11:20,108 Uh, Mom, where did you even get that dress? 240 00:11:20,108 --> 00:11:21,567 Gladys sent it over. 241 00:11:21,567 --> 00:11:23,358 From what I understand, 242 00:11:23,358 --> 00:11:26,067 three generations have won in it. So far. 243 00:11:26,067 --> 00:11:31,025 Did all three generations wear it at the same time? 244 00:11:43,608 --> 00:11:45,567 [loudly] What?! 245 00:11:45,567 --> 00:11:47,525 I've been thinking. 246 00:11:47,525 --> 00:11:51,317 Ernie, you know nothing good ever comes of that. 247 00:11:52,983 --> 00:11:55,150 I think Mom made a big mistake 248 00:11:55,150 --> 00:11:56,692 leaving you in charge. 249 00:11:56,692 --> 00:11:59,400 So if I can beat you at something, 250 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:00,942 then I'm in charge of you. 251 00:12:00,942 --> 00:12:02,775 - Deal? - Deal. 252 00:12:02,775 --> 00:12:04,942 What you don't know is, 253 00:12:04,942 --> 00:12:06,733 I've been working out 254 00:12:06,733 --> 00:12:09,275 with strength-resistance bands. 255 00:12:09,275 --> 00:12:11,983 Who's ready for some arm wrestling, little girl? 256 00:12:11,983 --> 00:12:14,025 I guess if you really want to. 257 00:12:20,608 --> 00:12:22,108 [knuckles cracking] 258 00:12:29,650 --> 00:12:32,317 One, two, three. 259 00:12:33,900 --> 00:12:35,442 Oh, yeah. 260 00:12:35,442 --> 00:12:37,025 Oh, did we start? 261 00:12:42,733 --> 00:12:44,858 Best two out of three? 262 00:12:52,733 --> 00:12:54,900 KC, can I just say, your dress... 263 00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:56,733 Don't bother. Let me do it for you. 264 00:12:56,733 --> 00:12:58,817 This dress is so big, 265 00:12:58,817 --> 00:13:02,150 it has seven other small dresses stuck in its orbit. 266 00:13:02,150 --> 00:13:03,692 This dress is so big, 267 00:13:03,692 --> 00:13:05,525 it won't even return Beyoncé's calls. 268 00:13:05,525 --> 00:13:07,150 This dress is so big, 269 00:13:07,150 --> 00:13:09,400 movie theaters now sell popcorn in three sizes-- 270 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:12,067 regular, large, and this dress. 271 00:13:12,067 --> 00:13:15,400 I was just gonna say it looks really pretty. 272 00:13:16,775 --> 00:13:18,567 Is it just me, 273 00:13:18,567 --> 00:13:20,025 or has your mom been giving me the stink eye 274 00:13:20,025 --> 00:13:21,983 this whole time I've been here? 275 00:13:21,983 --> 00:13:24,192 What? No. I'm sure you're just imagining it. 276 00:13:24,192 --> 00:13:25,942 Am I? 277 00:13:28,733 --> 00:13:31,983 Man, you can smell that stink eye from over here. 278 00:13:33,942 --> 00:13:35,942 Look, okay, the truth is, 279 00:13:35,942 --> 00:13:37,775 this isn't really a mother-daughter bonding weekend. 280 00:13:37,775 --> 00:13:39,067 We're on a mission. 281 00:13:39,067 --> 00:13:41,150 I'm on a secret mission? 282 00:13:41,150 --> 00:13:43,942 No. I'm on a mission. 283 00:13:43,942 --> 00:13:45,900 You're helping me with my hair and makeup. 284 00:13:45,900 --> 00:13:49,942 Oh. I'm helping out on a secret mission! 285 00:13:49,942 --> 00:13:53,150 Yeah, rule number one in helping out on a secret mission 286 00:13:53,150 --> 00:13:57,150 is you don't go around yelling "I'm helping out on a secret mission." 287 00:14:00,692 --> 00:14:03,108 All right, short circuit, 288 00:14:03,108 --> 00:14:05,692 your reign of terror is about to end. 289 00:14:05,692 --> 00:14:09,025 I challenge you to a jumping contest. 290 00:14:09,025 --> 00:14:13,025 It's a little-known fact, I got mad hops. 291 00:14:13,025 --> 00:14:16,275 He who can jump up and grab a leaf off that tree 292 00:14:16,275 --> 00:14:17,483 is in charge. 293 00:14:17,483 --> 00:14:19,983 All right, Hoppy, jump away. 294 00:14:31,650 --> 00:14:34,233 Watch and learn. 295 00:14:39,608 --> 00:14:41,525 Ha! 296 00:14:41,525 --> 00:14:43,900 Your turn. 297 00:14:51,067 --> 00:14:53,275 Okay. You proved your point. 298 00:14:53,275 --> 00:14:55,067 Nobody likes a show-off. 299 00:15:01,358 --> 00:15:03,067 Mom. 300 00:15:03,067 --> 00:15:05,442 Do you have any more information about the mission? 301 00:15:05,442 --> 00:15:07,942 - The what? - The mission. 302 00:15:07,942 --> 00:15:09,567 The reason why we are here. 303 00:15:09,567 --> 00:15:11,858 Oh, the mission. STYLE ::cue() 304 00:15:11,858 --> 00:15:13,025 Right. 305 00:15:14,358 --> 00:15:16,692 Oh, been lookin' for that. 306 00:15:16,692 --> 00:15:18,650 Gladys just gave us an update. 307 00:15:18,650 --> 00:15:21,733 Okay, what does it say? 308 00:15:21,733 --> 00:15:24,900 Okay, let's see. 309 00:15:24,900 --> 00:15:28,150 Oh, there are a pair of spies 310 00:15:28,150 --> 00:15:30,900 working as mother and daughter 311 00:15:30,900 --> 00:15:33,733 who are part of a... sleeper cell 312 00:15:33,733 --> 00:15:37,317 we need to identify. 313 00:15:37,317 --> 00:15:39,567 - Seriously? - Yes, seriously. 314 00:15:39,567 --> 00:15:41,567 It's not like I'm makin' this stuff up. 315 00:15:41,567 --> 00:15:43,067 Oh, and, um... 316 00:15:43,067 --> 00:15:44,900 by the way, 317 00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:47,108 Gladys wants you to wear more makeup. 318 00:15:47,108 --> 00:15:49,900 She didn't think you look glamorous enough. 319 00:15:49,900 --> 00:15:52,067 How does she even know what I look like? 320 00:15:52,067 --> 00:15:54,733 Sweetheart, cameras everywhere. 321 00:15:57,067 --> 00:15:58,858 Hey, Gladys. 322 00:16:02,192 --> 00:16:03,942 Good evening, dear. 323 00:16:03,942 --> 00:16:07,025 Oh, you look absolutely stunning. 324 00:16:07,025 --> 00:16:09,025 But that's no surprise, considering your legacy. 325 00:16:09,025 --> 00:16:11,817 Ah, my legacy. 326 00:16:11,817 --> 00:16:14,067 What legacy would that be again? 327 00:16:14,067 --> 00:16:15,817 Well, I just met your mother, 328 00:16:15,817 --> 00:16:18,650 and she showed me a picture of her in that very same gown 329 00:16:18,650 --> 00:16:20,150 at her cotillion. 330 00:16:20,150 --> 00:16:22,025 Uh, I'm sorry, ma'am. 331 00:16:22,025 --> 00:16:23,817 I think you might be mistaken. 332 00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:25,983 Oh, no, I am quite sure. 333 00:16:25,983 --> 00:16:29,567 Your mother is a former Miss Debutante, 334 00:16:29,567 --> 00:16:32,942 as was your grandmother and great-grandmother before her. 335 00:16:32,942 --> 00:16:36,567 That makes you a fourth-generation debutante. 336 00:16:36,567 --> 00:16:39,358 Wait. So I too got four gene-ray-rays 337 00:16:39,358 --> 00:16:41,400 up in this piece? 338 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:43,525 I mean... 339 00:16:43,525 --> 00:16:45,192 yes, I realize that. 340 00:16:45,192 --> 00:16:47,025 Oh. 341 00:16:47,025 --> 00:16:50,692 In fact, I'm startin' to realize a lot of things. 342 00:16:57,067 --> 00:17:00,858 Aspiring to save the world isn't easy. 343 00:17:00,858 --> 00:17:04,025 Yes, I could donate millions and millions 344 00:17:04,025 --> 00:17:06,483 and millions from my trust fund. 345 00:17:06,483 --> 00:17:09,650 But instead, my life's mission 346 00:17:09,650 --> 00:17:13,483 is to inspire others to give. 347 00:17:13,483 --> 00:17:15,983 Apparently, they take this whole speech nonsense 348 00:17:15,983 --> 00:17:18,525 very seriously. 349 00:17:18,525 --> 00:17:21,025 So I have a few index cards Gladys made for you. 350 00:17:21,025 --> 00:17:23,317 Oh, don't worry, Mother. 351 00:17:23,317 --> 00:17:25,983 I wouldn't wanna let... Gladys down. 352 00:17:28,692 --> 00:17:30,067 Thank you, Kitten. 353 00:17:30,067 --> 00:17:33,275 You speak beautifully in public. 354 00:17:33,275 --> 00:17:35,067 Obviously, she's read my book, 355 00:17:35,067 --> 00:17:39,108 How To Speak Beautifully In Public. 356 00:17:39,108 --> 00:17:41,067 By the way, it is available in the lobby. 357 00:17:41,067 --> 00:17:43,858 [Miss Holley's voice] Cash only. 358 00:17:43,858 --> 00:17:47,067 Next, we will hear from Miss KC Cooper. 359 00:17:52,733 --> 00:17:54,233 [sighs] Thank you, everyone. 360 00:17:54,233 --> 00:17:56,108 My name is KC Cooper, 361 00:17:56,108 --> 00:17:58,900 and for my speech, I'm going to need 362 00:17:58,900 --> 00:18:01,108 a bit of assistance from Miss Holley. 363 00:18:01,108 --> 00:18:03,483 - Miss Holley. - Yes. 364 00:18:03,483 --> 00:18:07,317 Pull my finger. 365 00:18:12,983 --> 00:18:15,067 Oh, Judy. 366 00:18:17,150 --> 00:18:20,858 Ernie, I've lost interest in this whole game. 367 00:18:20,858 --> 00:18:23,108 If you want to be in charge so bad, 368 00:18:23,108 --> 00:18:26,108 fine, you're in charge. 369 00:18:26,108 --> 00:18:28,067 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 370 00:18:28,067 --> 00:18:31,358 I don't need your pathetic little handouts. 371 00:18:31,358 --> 00:18:33,150 All right, sometimes I do. 372 00:18:33,150 --> 00:18:34,942 But not this time. 373 00:18:34,942 --> 00:18:36,942 I finally figured out the one thing 374 00:18:36,942 --> 00:18:39,317 - you can't beat me at. - Losing? 375 00:18:39,317 --> 00:18:41,108 Uh, no. 376 00:18:41,108 --> 00:18:42,817 An eating competition. 377 00:18:42,817 --> 00:18:45,817 That's not fair. I don't eat. 378 00:18:45,817 --> 00:18:48,317 Oh, that's right. 379 00:18:48,317 --> 00:18:49,942 I forgot. 380 00:18:49,942 --> 00:18:51,317 Robots don't eat. 381 00:18:51,317 --> 00:18:53,525 So what I'm hearing is... 382 00:18:53,525 --> 00:18:55,150 I win! 383 00:18:55,150 --> 00:18:57,108 That's right, winner winner, chicken dinner, 384 00:18:57,108 --> 00:18:58,650 which you also can't eat. 385 00:18:58,650 --> 00:19:01,442 [choking] 386 00:19:05,567 --> 00:19:09,150 Hey, looks like you can't eat either. 387 00:19:09,150 --> 00:19:11,025 Guess it's a tie. 388 00:19:15,650 --> 00:19:18,067 And finally, I'd like to present 389 00:19:18,067 --> 00:19:20,775 our debutantes to society. 390 00:19:20,775 --> 00:19:23,817 Evelyn Merkintosh of Bridgeport, Virginia. 391 00:19:26,983 --> 00:19:32,192 KC Coretta Scott Cooper of Arlington, Virginia. 392 00:19:45,983 --> 00:19:47,483 What happened to you? 393 00:19:47,483 --> 00:19:50,983 You look like you got into a fight with a cat. 394 00:19:50,983 --> 00:19:51,942 And the cat won. 395 00:19:53,275 --> 00:19:55,483 Mom, I completed our mission. 396 00:19:55,483 --> 00:19:57,275 What are you talkin' about? 397 00:19:57,275 --> 00:19:58,983 Remember Kitten Van Camp? 398 00:19:58,983 --> 00:20:01,983 She and her mother were the undercover spies, 399 00:20:01,983 --> 00:20:04,067 but it's okay, 'cause I took care of them. 400 00:20:04,067 --> 00:20:05,192 You took care of them? 401 00:20:05,192 --> 00:20:06,942 Yeah, I took care of them. 402 00:20:06,942 --> 00:20:08,983 Wiped 'em out, eliminated 'em. 403 00:20:08,983 --> 00:20:10,442 They're swimming with the fishes. STYLE ::cue() 404 00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:15,108 I don't really know all the technical terms for it, 405 00:20:15,108 --> 00:20:17,608 but rest assured, we won't be hearing from them 406 00:20:17,608 --> 00:20:19,817 for a long time. 407 00:20:20,983 --> 00:20:22,442 Like forever. 408 00:20:22,442 --> 00:20:25,192 You eliminated Kitten and her mother? 409 00:20:25,192 --> 00:20:28,900 Yeah, and this janitor who just walked in at the wrong time. 410 00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:30,983 But it was kind of convenient, because he had a mop. 411 00:20:32,650 --> 00:20:34,233 Oh, baby, no! 412 00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:37,067 Oh, Mama, yeah. 413 00:20:37,067 --> 00:20:39,650 Why... why would you do that? 414 00:20:39,650 --> 00:20:41,358 I had no choice. 415 00:20:41,358 --> 00:20:43,275 I got an email telling me to from Gladys. 416 00:20:43,275 --> 00:20:45,650 From Gladys? There is no-- 417 00:20:45,650 --> 00:20:47,483 Presenting Kitten Van Camp 418 00:20:47,483 --> 00:20:49,900 of Manassas, Virginia. 419 00:20:55,067 --> 00:20:56,983 When did you figure it out? 420 00:21:00,817 --> 00:21:03,900 Well, I had a little chitchat with Miss Holley 421 00:21:03,900 --> 00:21:06,025 and she told me all about my legacy, 422 00:21:06,025 --> 00:21:07,858 although I should've known something was up 423 00:21:07,858 --> 00:21:12,108 when we went undercover using our real names. 424 00:21:12,108 --> 00:21:13,525 Oopsie. 425 00:21:15,317 --> 00:21:17,317 Honey, I'm so sorry. 426 00:21:17,317 --> 00:21:18,900 It's just that this cotillion 427 00:21:18,900 --> 00:21:21,567 is something I always wanted us to experience together. 428 00:21:21,567 --> 00:21:23,317 Mom, why didn't you just tell me? 429 00:21:23,317 --> 00:21:25,067 Don't you think I would've done it? 430 00:21:25,067 --> 00:21:27,942 Okay, don't you think I would've done it 431 00:21:27,942 --> 00:21:30,900 once I realized how important it was to you? 432 00:21:30,900 --> 00:21:32,858 Okay. 433 00:21:32,858 --> 00:21:34,775 Don't you think I would've done it once I realized 434 00:21:34,775 --> 00:21:37,108 how important it was to you and you guilted me into it? 435 00:21:37,108 --> 00:21:40,525 Okay, yeah, I'm startin' to see why you tricked me into it. 436 00:21:42,942 --> 00:21:45,692 Sweetheart, I'm sorry. 437 00:21:45,692 --> 00:21:48,067 It's just that you're growing up so fast. 438 00:21:48,067 --> 00:21:51,775 I want to savor these moments while I still got 'em. 439 00:21:51,775 --> 00:21:53,983 It's okay. I love you, Mom. 440 00:21:53,983 --> 00:21:55,567 I love you, too, baby. 441 00:21:57,983 --> 00:22:01,067 And now, our Miss Debutante 442 00:22:01,067 --> 00:22:05,817 of the 104th Chesapeake, Virginia, cotillion is... 443 00:22:05,817 --> 00:22:09,108 KC Coretta Scott Cooper. 444 00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:13,942 That's my girl! 445 00:22:13,942 --> 00:22:16,775 I mean, congratulations. 446 00:22:18,817 --> 00:22:22,025 I won? How in the heck did I win? 447 00:22:22,025 --> 00:22:23,358 Sweetheart, you inherited my genes. 448 00:22:23,358 --> 00:22:25,067 It's in your DNA. 449 00:22:25,067 --> 00:22:28,983 Huh. Guess I'm a little more sophisticated and classy 450 00:22:28,983 --> 00:22:30,858 than I give myself credit for. 451 00:22:30,858 --> 00:22:33,067 You sure are, baby. 452 00:22:33,067 --> 00:22:36,733 I can't believe my baby won. 453 00:22:36,733 --> 00:22:39,233 Why not? You paid to make it happen. 454 00:22:39,233 --> 00:22:41,608 And by the way... 455 00:22:41,608 --> 00:22:44,150 [both] Cash only. 456 00:22:49,942 --> 00:22:52,358 I still think you could've helped me with this. 457 00:22:52,358 --> 00:22:53,817 It was a tie, 458 00:22:53,817 --> 00:22:55,525 so technically, we're both in charge. 459 00:22:55,525 --> 00:22:59,192 Ernie, does it really matter who's in charge? 460 00:22:59,192 --> 00:23:02,108 No, I guess not. 461 00:23:04,317 --> 00:23:05,650 Wow, this place looks great, 462 00:23:05,650 --> 00:23:07,692 like cleaner than when we left. 463 00:23:07,692 --> 00:23:10,317 Ernie, did you move out for the weekend? 464 00:23:10,317 --> 00:23:12,608 Oh, leave him alone. He did a good job. 465 00:23:12,608 --> 00:23:15,650 I knew I was right to leave you in charge, baby. 466 00:23:15,650 --> 00:23:18,483 I was in charge? 467 00:23:19,983 --> 00:23:21,400 I was in charge?! 468 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:23,025 Judy! 469 00:23:23,025 --> 00:23:25,025 [nervous laughter] 470 00:23:25,025 --> 00:23:27,067 Look at that. 471 00:23:27,067 --> 00:23:28,817 Looks like I made a mistake.