1
00:00:09,275 --> 00:00:10,858
Oh, thank you.
2
00:00:10,858 --> 00:00:12,192
Thank you.
3
00:00:13,858 --> 00:00:16,192
What in the Queen Latifah
is goin' on?
4
00:00:16,192 --> 00:00:20,358
Oh, just reliving
my days at the Cotillion Ball.
5
00:00:20,358 --> 00:00:22,108
Cotillion Bowl?
6
00:00:22,108 --> 00:00:23,775
I didn't know you played
football in college.
7
00:00:23,775 --> 00:00:25,983
Cotillion Ball.
8
00:00:25,983 --> 00:00:28,983
It's a girl's proper
introduction to society.
9
00:00:28,983 --> 00:00:30,442
Look.
10
00:00:30,442 --> 00:00:31,983
This is the dress
I wore
11
00:00:31,983 --> 00:00:34,233
- when I won
Miss Debutante.
- Aww.
12
00:00:34,233 --> 00:00:36,025
Your grandma
and your great-grandma wore it
13
00:00:36,025 --> 00:00:37,942
- when they won, too.
- Aww.
14
00:00:37,942 --> 00:00:39,983
And now, KC'll wear it
to the ball.
15
00:00:39,983 --> 00:00:42,650
Uh-uh!
16
00:00:42,650 --> 00:00:44,525
Have you ever met KC?
17
00:00:44,525 --> 00:00:46,150
Have you ever met
your mama?
18
00:00:46,150 --> 00:00:48,983
I have my ways.
19
00:00:48,983 --> 00:00:53,858
This is gonna be
the best mother-daughter
bonding experience ever...
20
00:00:53,858 --> 00:00:55,442
whether she likes
it or not.
21
00:00:59,442 --> 00:01:01,233
Oh, honey,
pack your bags.
22
00:01:01,233 --> 00:01:03,775
Your dad is on a mission,
and you and I are going
23
00:01:03,775 --> 00:01:05,692
to Chesapeake for
the Cotillion Ball.
24
00:01:05,692 --> 00:01:09,025
Are we also gonna make
a pit stop at Fantasyland,
25
00:01:09,025 --> 00:01:10,650
because that's
never gonna happen.
26
00:01:10,650 --> 00:01:12,900
I know.
27
00:01:12,900 --> 00:01:14,733
Who wants to wear
a big ol' gown
28
00:01:14,733 --> 00:01:16,108
and get their hair
all did?
29
00:01:16,108 --> 00:01:17,817
- Not me.
- Me either.
30
00:01:17,817 --> 00:01:20,025
I mean, it's not like
we have to take every mission
31
00:01:20,025 --> 00:01:21,108
they throw our way.
32
00:01:21,108 --> 00:01:23,025
Wait a minute,
it's a mission?
33
00:01:23,025 --> 00:01:24,733
Eh, don't worry
about it.
34
00:01:24,733 --> 00:01:26,983
Of course, they'll
bump us down in seniority,
35
00:01:26,983 --> 00:01:28,025
but who cares?
36
00:01:28,025 --> 00:01:30,442
I care.
I care a lot.
37
00:01:30,442 --> 00:01:32,108
Mom, I think we should go.
38
00:01:32,108 --> 00:01:33,650
It's okay, KC.
39
00:01:33,650 --> 00:01:35,775
To be honest,
I've really lost interest.
40
00:01:35,775 --> 00:01:38,025
Well, get interested.
I'm gonna go pack my bags.
41
00:01:38,025 --> 00:01:40,150
We are going
to that cotillion.
42
00:01:40,150 --> 00:01:43,358
- Well, fine,
if you insist.
- I do.
43
00:01:47,150 --> 00:01:50,942
Oh, Kira,
you're so good...
44
00:01:50,942 --> 00:01:52,692
at bein' bad.
45
00:01:54,733 --> 00:01:58,108
♪ Oh, when danger
comes for you ♪
46
00:01:58,108 --> 00:02:01,150
♪ You know
I'll stand beside you ♪
47
00:02:01,150 --> 00:02:05,067
♪ 'Cause ain't nobody
keep things hustle cool ♪
48
00:02:05,067 --> 00:02:09,358
♪ I'll always find a way,
a way out of the fire ♪
49
00:02:09,358 --> 00:02:13,400
♪ Don't tell nobody,
tell nobody ♪
50
00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,192
♪ I'm not perfect ♪
51
00:02:15,192 --> 00:02:19,192
♪ So many things
I wanna tell you ♪
52
00:02:19,192 --> 00:02:23,192
♪ But I, I, I,
I keep it undercover ♪
53
00:02:23,192 --> 00:02:25,192
♪ Livin' my life,
no way to learn ♪
54
00:02:25,192 --> 00:02:27,400
♪ Doin' my thing,
gonna make it work ♪
55
00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:30,067
♪ Know I'm the realest,
baby, I'm fearless ♪
56
00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:32,150
♪ But I always
got your back ♪
57
00:02:32,150 --> 00:02:33,983
♪ Nobody can do it
like I can ♪
58
00:02:33,983 --> 00:02:35,942
♪ I gotta find out
who I am ♪
59
00:02:35,942 --> 00:02:38,900
♪ Ain't got to worry
about me ♪
60
00:02:38,900 --> 00:02:40,192
♪ It's all
part of the plan ♪
61
00:02:40,192 --> 00:02:42,525
I keep it undercover.
62
00:02:42,525 --> 00:02:43,900
I keep it
undercover.
63
00:02:46,942 --> 00:02:50,567
Good afternoon,
and salutations.
64
00:02:50,567 --> 00:02:54,067
I am Miss Holley
of the Arlington Holleys.
65
00:02:54,067 --> 00:02:57,733
You may recognize me
from the picture on my book
66
00:02:57,733 --> 00:03:00,275
If you don't,
Excuse You:
67
00:03:00,275 --> 00:03:03,275
Living A Life of
Elegance and Class
68
00:03:03,275 --> 00:03:05,275
is available for
purchase in the lobby.
69
00:03:05,275 --> 00:03:07,067
Cash only.
70
00:03:13,025 --> 00:03:13,983
You're late.
71
00:03:13,983 --> 00:03:15,483
I'm sorry, okay?
72
00:03:15,483 --> 00:03:16,942
It took me a while to zip up.
73
00:03:16,942 --> 00:03:20,025
Thankfully, I was able
to pop my shoulder back in.
74
00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,275
Welcome to
the 104th annual
75
00:03:24,275 --> 00:03:26,442
mother-daughter
debutante tea.
76
00:03:26,442 --> 00:03:29,483
What a resplendent
group of young ladies.
77
00:03:29,483 --> 00:03:31,150
And the daughters aren't
half bad either.
78
00:03:32,650 --> 00:03:35,233
Elbows!
79
00:03:37,108 --> 00:03:41,733
What? You have to fit
in for the mission.
80
00:03:41,733 --> 00:03:43,608
And what exactly
is this mission--
81
00:03:43,608 --> 00:03:45,442
to set feminism
back 100 years?
82
00:03:45,442 --> 00:03:47,817
Well, Gladys,
our new handler,
83
00:03:47,817 --> 00:03:49,233
isn't big on details.
84
00:03:49,233 --> 00:03:50,983
But look around you.
85
00:03:50,983 --> 00:03:54,233
This place is filled
with VIP's.
86
00:03:54,233 --> 00:03:57,650
Over there,
ambassador's daughter.
87
00:03:57,650 --> 00:04:00,025
And there,
governor's daughter.
88
00:04:00,025 --> 00:04:02,483
And Ms. Mega-bucks
over there,
89
00:04:02,483 --> 00:04:05,108
well, her family
makes the strings
90
00:04:05,108 --> 00:04:07,150
for 90% of
all the teabags.
91
00:04:07,150 --> 00:04:09,025
Wait, so what
I'm hearin' is,
92
00:04:09,025 --> 00:04:13,358
she's a chamo-millionaire.
93
00:04:13,358 --> 00:04:16,483
Hey! My arm wasn't even
on the table that time.
94
00:04:18,108 --> 00:04:21,150
And before we crown
our Miss Debutante,
95
00:04:21,150 --> 00:04:24,817
our beaus will present
our ladies to society,
96
00:04:24,817 --> 00:04:27,775
and they are handsome.
97
00:04:27,775 --> 00:04:30,358
Why, if I were just
40 years younger,
98
00:04:30,358 --> 00:04:33,150
I'd still be a tad
too old for them.
99
00:04:33,150 --> 00:04:34,900
And now, ladies,
100
00:04:34,900 --> 00:04:37,525
please join me
for the walkabout.
101
00:04:39,358 --> 00:04:41,858
Mom, what exactly
is the point of this?
102
00:04:41,858 --> 00:04:43,858
Why can't we just do a...
103
00:04:43,858 --> 00:04:46,067
chill-about, or
a get-your-grub-on-about?
104
00:04:46,067 --> 00:04:49,483
Well, if I had to guess,
105
00:04:49,483 --> 00:04:51,900
it's a way to demonstrate
a young lady's posture
106
00:04:51,900 --> 00:04:53,942
and elegance
and grace.
107
00:04:53,942 --> 00:04:56,025
They call it PEG.
108
00:04:56,025 --> 00:04:58,025
I think.
I don't know.
STYLE
::cue()
109
00:05:03,108 --> 00:05:04,275
Oh, hey, Judy.
110
00:05:04,275 --> 00:05:06,608
Be a doll and get me
a glass of milk.
111
00:05:06,608 --> 00:05:09,400
After that, you can have
an hour of TV, then lights out.
112
00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:12,983
- Aw, did you enjoy it?
- Enjoy what?
113
00:05:12,983 --> 00:05:15,900
Your five seconds of thinking
you are the boss of me.
114
00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:18,025
I'm in charge.
115
00:05:18,025 --> 00:05:20,358
Put that in your
glass of milk and drink it.
116
00:05:21,900 --> 00:05:24,358
Slow your roll,
chips for brains.
117
00:05:24,358 --> 00:05:27,858
What makes you think
you're in charge?
118
00:05:27,858 --> 00:05:29,650
Let's see.
Agent Kira left me
119
00:05:29,650 --> 00:05:32,317
all the emergency contact
information,
120
00:05:32,317 --> 00:05:34,108
a list of your allergies,
121
00:05:34,108 --> 00:05:36,317
and, oh yeah, she said,
"Judy, you're in charge."
122
00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:49,192
[loud belch]
123
00:05:52,900 --> 00:05:54,858
If there's a belching
competition,
124
00:05:54,858 --> 00:05:57,108
you're definitely
a shoo-in.
125
00:05:57,108 --> 00:05:57,983
I'm KC.
126
00:05:57,983 --> 00:06:01,067
What's good, yo?
Kiki.
127
00:06:01,067 --> 00:06:03,233
Well, here they call me
Kitten.
128
00:06:03,233 --> 00:06:05,025
I'm not really feelin'
this whole high society,
129
00:06:05,025 --> 00:06:06,983
sip-your-tea-proper
type situation.
130
00:06:06,983 --> 00:06:10,650
Really? Your army boots
didn't give that away at all.
131
00:06:10,650 --> 00:06:12,317
I have to do it.
132
00:06:12,317 --> 00:06:13,900
I got four gene-ray-rays
up in this piece, you feel me?
133
00:06:13,900 --> 00:06:15,692
I got my moms, my grandmoms,
134
00:06:15,692 --> 00:06:17,400
my great-grandmoms.
135
00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,067
We call her Mom-Moms.
136
00:06:19,067 --> 00:06:22,108
Isn't that technically
your mom-mom's mom?
137
00:06:24,358 --> 00:06:25,442
Ladies.
138
00:06:27,275 --> 00:06:29,483
Ma'am, I was just
telling KC about
139
00:06:29,483 --> 00:06:31,692
my amazing journey
to Africa
140
00:06:31,692 --> 00:06:33,858
to dig wells in order
to provide clean water
141
00:06:33,858 --> 00:06:35,983
to local villages.
142
00:06:35,983 --> 00:06:38,317
You are an angel, Kitten.
143
00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:41,817
Is that young lady...
[horrified gasp]
144
00:06:41,817 --> 00:06:44,192
She is chewin' gum!
145
00:06:44,192 --> 00:06:48,025
Young lady, chompin' your cud
is barnyard behavior.
146
00:06:48,025 --> 00:06:51,275
Uh... is it just me,
147
00:06:51,275 --> 00:06:54,483
or did you just go all British
up in this piece, yo?
148
00:06:54,483 --> 00:06:57,400
My moms bribed me with
new wheels to get me here,
149
00:06:57,400 --> 00:07:00,108
so I gotta flex my lady skills,
know what I'm sayin'?
150
00:07:00,108 --> 00:07:02,025
Yeah, I know...
151
00:07:02,025 --> 00:07:04,150
Yeah, I know what you...
152
00:07:04,150 --> 00:07:06,025
I feel you.
153
00:07:07,942 --> 00:07:10,650
Would you excuse me
for a second?
154
00:07:15,775 --> 00:07:18,150
Yo, Moms...
I mean, Mother, uh...
155
00:07:20,108 --> 00:07:21,983
I think our mission
has to do with that
tea-string heiress.
156
00:07:21,983 --> 00:07:23,983
See that diamond necklace
around her neck?
157
00:07:23,983 --> 00:07:26,108
I think we're here
to stop a robbery.
158
00:07:26,108 --> 00:07:30,775
Well, it is like you are
reading my emails.
159
00:07:30,775 --> 00:07:33,817
Gladys just told me to
watch her like a hawk.
160
00:07:33,817 --> 00:07:36,567
Watch her style and grace.
161
00:07:36,567 --> 00:07:38,483
The way she holds
her teacup,
162
00:07:38,483 --> 00:07:40,733
now, see, that is
a perfect pinky.
163
00:07:40,733 --> 00:07:44,067
Why exactly would I
care about that stuff?
164
00:07:44,067 --> 00:07:48,067
Oh, did I mention
the rest of the email?
165
00:07:48,067 --> 00:07:49,358
Gladys said you have to
win Miss Debutante.
166
00:07:49,358 --> 00:07:52,650
What? Why?
167
00:07:52,650 --> 00:07:54,067
Why? Who knows why?
168
00:07:54,067 --> 00:07:55,608
Do I know why?
I don't know why.
169
00:07:56,858 --> 00:08:00,108
But I do know that
my job is to follow orders.
170
00:08:00,108 --> 00:08:02,983
Wait, Mom, so you really
expect me to win this thing?
171
00:08:02,983 --> 00:08:06,400
Well, they'd probably
settle for second place.
172
00:08:10,942 --> 00:08:13,067
And we're curtsying.
173
00:08:13,067 --> 00:08:15,608
And curtsying.
174
00:08:15,608 --> 00:08:18,608
And curtsying.
175
00:08:18,608 --> 00:08:19,942
Well, some of you are.
176
00:08:19,942 --> 00:08:22,067
Some of you look like
a dizzy flamingo.
177
00:08:23,983 --> 00:08:25,275
Now remember, ladies,
178
00:08:25,275 --> 00:08:27,025
if you wish to have
the perfect curtsy,
179
00:08:27,025 --> 00:08:29,983
my DVD, Perfect Curtsying,
180
00:08:29,983 --> 00:08:32,858
is available
in the lobby.
181
00:08:32,858 --> 00:08:34,858
- Cash only.
- Cash only.
182
00:08:38,483 --> 00:08:40,858
Isn't this the most fun
we've ever had?
183
00:08:40,858 --> 00:08:43,025
You know, on a mission.
184
00:08:43,025 --> 00:08:46,192
Yeah, we're havin'
a blast.
185
00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:48,358
I have an idea
how I can win that title.
186
00:08:48,358 --> 00:08:50,567
Lay it on me, baby.
I'm here to support you.
187
00:08:50,567 --> 00:08:52,067
If I'm gonna win,
188
00:08:52,067 --> 00:08:53,692
I need someone really good
in my corner
189
00:08:53,692 --> 00:08:55,358
with hair, makeup,
wardrobe.
190
00:08:55,358 --> 00:08:57,442
You don't have to
ask me twice.
191
00:08:57,442 --> 00:09:00,025
Yeah, I wasn't gonna
even ask you once.
192
00:09:01,567 --> 00:09:03,775
I think she meant me.
193
00:09:06,233 --> 00:09:08,733
Mom, can you believe that
Marisa got here on
such short notice?
194
00:09:08,733 --> 00:09:12,108
No. No, I cannot.
195
00:09:12,108 --> 00:09:12,942
What is she doing here?
196
00:09:12,942 --> 00:09:15,150
Well, she's my glam squad.
197
00:09:15,150 --> 00:09:18,108
Who better to take me
from blah to ♪ Ah! ♪
198
00:09:18,108 --> 00:09:19,942
Oh, I don't know.
199
00:09:19,942 --> 00:09:21,817
Maybe your ma.
200
00:09:21,817 --> 00:09:23,983
I can't believe
you asked her here.
201
00:09:23,983 --> 00:09:25,983
Well, thank you,
Mrs. Cooper,
202
00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:28,442
and here I was wondering
if taking three buses,
203
00:09:28,442 --> 00:09:29,942
two trains and running
half a mile to get here
204
00:09:29,942 --> 00:09:32,067
was worth it.
205
00:09:32,067 --> 00:09:34,942
I'll just go grab
the rest of my stuff.
206
00:09:34,942 --> 00:09:37,150
Don't worry.
I don't need a hand.
207
00:09:38,900 --> 00:09:40,567
KC, what is
wrong with you?
208
00:09:40,567 --> 00:09:42,900
What is wrong with me?
What is wrong with you?
209
00:09:42,900 --> 00:09:45,067
Our cover is
mother and daughter,
210
00:09:45,067 --> 00:09:46,900
not mother, daughter,
and some friend of yours
211
00:09:46,900 --> 00:09:49,025
who doesn't belong here
but for some reason is.
212
00:09:49,025 --> 00:09:51,358
Mom, relax, okay?
As far as Marisa knows,
213
00:09:51,358 --> 00:09:52,942
we are just bonding
at a cotillion
214
00:09:52,942 --> 00:09:54,817
that you forced me
to go to, okay,
215
00:09:54,817 --> 00:09:56,275
but we both
know the truth.
216
00:09:58,483 --> 00:10:00,192
Well, one of us does.
STYLE
::cue()
217
00:10:11,150 --> 00:10:13,567
Okay, I know you think
Marisa is some makeup genius,
218
00:10:13,567 --> 00:10:15,942
but honestly, I have never
seen you look worse.
219
00:10:15,942 --> 00:10:18,942
Seriously, you look
horrible.
220
00:10:18,942 --> 00:10:21,733
She hasn't put any makeup
on me yet.
221
00:10:23,317 --> 00:10:26,025
So far, it's just
the face you gave her.
222
00:10:28,483 --> 00:10:31,317
Girl, you are on thin ice.
223
00:10:33,817 --> 00:10:36,317
And this is the dress
I brought you.
224
00:10:36,317 --> 00:10:38,275
Oh, no.
225
00:10:38,275 --> 00:10:40,567
What happened to
the dress I brought you?
226
00:10:40,567 --> 00:10:42,942
Well, I've heard of
polka dots.
227
00:10:42,942 --> 00:10:46,275
I never really heard of
polka holes.
228
00:10:46,275 --> 00:10:48,317
Oh, look at that.
229
00:10:48,317 --> 00:10:51,108
I guess moths must have
gotten to it.
230
00:10:51,900 --> 00:10:53,983
It's a rookie mistake.
231
00:10:53,983 --> 00:10:56,108
You should've packed it
like I packed this one--
232
00:10:56,108 --> 00:10:58,942
in cedar cellophane,
oh, and love.
233
00:11:03,650 --> 00:11:06,150
Almost 100 years old.
234
00:11:06,150 --> 00:11:08,775
It looks like the day
it was sewn together.
235
00:11:08,775 --> 00:11:10,233
You know what?
Fine.
236
00:11:10,233 --> 00:11:11,942
This dress will
actually be perfect
237
00:11:11,942 --> 00:11:14,108
for that party
I'm going to next week.
238
00:11:14,108 --> 00:11:17,025
after I make
a few more holes.
239
00:11:17,025 --> 00:11:20,108
Uh, Mom, where did you
even get that dress?
240
00:11:20,108 --> 00:11:21,567
Gladys sent it over.
241
00:11:21,567 --> 00:11:23,358
From what I understand,
242
00:11:23,358 --> 00:11:26,067
three generations
have won in it. So far.
243
00:11:26,067 --> 00:11:31,025
Did all three generations
wear it at the same time?
244
00:11:43,608 --> 00:11:45,567
[loudly]
What?!
245
00:11:45,567 --> 00:11:47,525
I've been thinking.
246
00:11:47,525 --> 00:11:51,317
Ernie, you know nothing good
ever comes of that.
247
00:11:52,983 --> 00:11:55,150
I think Mom
made a big mistake
248
00:11:55,150 --> 00:11:56,692
leaving you in charge.
249
00:11:56,692 --> 00:11:59,400
So if I can beat you
at something,
250
00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:00,942
then I'm in charge of you.
251
00:12:00,942 --> 00:12:02,775
- Deal?
- Deal.
252
00:12:02,775 --> 00:12:04,942
What you don't know is,
253
00:12:04,942 --> 00:12:06,733
I've been working out
254
00:12:06,733 --> 00:12:09,275
with strength-resistance
bands.
255
00:12:09,275 --> 00:12:11,983
Who's ready for some
arm wrestling, little girl?
256
00:12:11,983 --> 00:12:14,025
I guess if you
really want to.
257
00:12:20,608 --> 00:12:22,108
[knuckles cracking]
258
00:12:29,650 --> 00:12:32,317
One, two, three.
259
00:12:33,900 --> 00:12:35,442
Oh, yeah.
260
00:12:35,442 --> 00:12:37,025
Oh, did we start?
261
00:12:42,733 --> 00:12:44,858
Best two out of three?
262
00:12:52,733 --> 00:12:54,900
KC, can I just say,
your dress...
263
00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:56,733
Don't bother.
Let me do it for you.
264
00:12:56,733 --> 00:12:58,817
This dress is so big,
265
00:12:58,817 --> 00:13:02,150
it has seven other small
dresses stuck in its orbit.
266
00:13:02,150 --> 00:13:03,692
This dress is so big,
267
00:13:03,692 --> 00:13:05,525
it won't even return
Beyoncé's calls.
268
00:13:05,525 --> 00:13:07,150
This dress is so big,
269
00:13:07,150 --> 00:13:09,400
movie theaters now
sell popcorn in
three sizes--
270
00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:12,067
regular, large,
and this dress.
271
00:13:12,067 --> 00:13:15,400
I was just gonna say
it looks really pretty.
272
00:13:16,775 --> 00:13:18,567
Is it just me,
273
00:13:18,567 --> 00:13:20,025
or has your mom
been giving me the stink eye
274
00:13:20,025 --> 00:13:21,983
this whole time
I've been here?
275
00:13:21,983 --> 00:13:24,192
What? No. I'm sure
you're just imagining it.
276
00:13:24,192 --> 00:13:25,942
Am I?
277
00:13:28,733 --> 00:13:31,983
Man, you can smell
that stink eye from over here.
278
00:13:33,942 --> 00:13:35,942
Look, okay, the truth is,
279
00:13:35,942 --> 00:13:37,775
this isn't really
a mother-daughter
bonding weekend.
280
00:13:37,775 --> 00:13:39,067
We're on a mission.
281
00:13:39,067 --> 00:13:41,150
I'm on a secret mission?
282
00:13:41,150 --> 00:13:43,942
No. I'm on a mission.
283
00:13:43,942 --> 00:13:45,900
You're helping me
with my hair and makeup.
284
00:13:45,900 --> 00:13:49,942
Oh. I'm helping out
on a secret mission!
285
00:13:49,942 --> 00:13:53,150
Yeah, rule number one
in helping out on
a secret mission
286
00:13:53,150 --> 00:13:57,150
is you don't go around
yelling "I'm helping out
on a secret mission."
287
00:14:00,692 --> 00:14:03,108
All right,
short circuit,
288
00:14:03,108 --> 00:14:05,692
your reign of terror
is about to end.
289
00:14:05,692 --> 00:14:09,025
I challenge you
to a jumping contest.
290
00:14:09,025 --> 00:14:13,025
It's a little-known fact,
I got mad hops.
291
00:14:13,025 --> 00:14:16,275
He who can jump up
and grab a leaf off that tree
292
00:14:16,275 --> 00:14:17,483
is in charge.
293
00:14:17,483 --> 00:14:19,983
All right, Hoppy,
jump away.
294
00:14:31,650 --> 00:14:34,233
Watch and learn.
295
00:14:39,608 --> 00:14:41,525
Ha!
296
00:14:41,525 --> 00:14:43,900
Your turn.
297
00:14:51,067 --> 00:14:53,275
Okay. You proved your point.
298
00:14:53,275 --> 00:14:55,067
Nobody likes
a show-off.
299
00:15:01,358 --> 00:15:03,067
Mom.
300
00:15:03,067 --> 00:15:05,442
Do you have any more
information about the mission?
301
00:15:05,442 --> 00:15:07,942
- The what?
- The mission.
302
00:15:07,942 --> 00:15:09,567
The reason
why we are here.
303
00:15:09,567 --> 00:15:11,858
Oh, the mission.
STYLE
::cue()
304
00:15:11,858 --> 00:15:13,025
Right.
305
00:15:14,358 --> 00:15:16,692
Oh, been lookin'
for that.
306
00:15:16,692 --> 00:15:18,650
Gladys just gave us
an update.
307
00:15:18,650 --> 00:15:21,733
Okay, what does it say?
308
00:15:21,733 --> 00:15:24,900
Okay, let's see.
309
00:15:24,900 --> 00:15:28,150
Oh, there are
a pair of spies
310
00:15:28,150 --> 00:15:30,900
working as
mother and daughter
311
00:15:30,900 --> 00:15:33,733
who are part of a...
sleeper cell
312
00:15:33,733 --> 00:15:37,317
we need to identify.
313
00:15:37,317 --> 00:15:39,567
- Seriously?
- Yes, seriously.
314
00:15:39,567 --> 00:15:41,567
It's not like I'm
makin' this stuff up.
315
00:15:41,567 --> 00:15:43,067
Oh, and, um...
316
00:15:43,067 --> 00:15:44,900
by the way,
317
00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:47,108
Gladys wants you
to wear more makeup.
318
00:15:47,108 --> 00:15:49,900
She didn't think
you look glamorous enough.
319
00:15:49,900 --> 00:15:52,067
How does she even
know what I look like?
320
00:15:52,067 --> 00:15:54,733
Sweetheart,
cameras everywhere.
321
00:15:57,067 --> 00:15:58,858
Hey, Gladys.
322
00:16:02,192 --> 00:16:03,942
Good evening, dear.
323
00:16:03,942 --> 00:16:07,025
Oh, you look
absolutely stunning.
324
00:16:07,025 --> 00:16:09,025
But that's no surprise,
considering your legacy.
325
00:16:09,025 --> 00:16:11,817
Ah, my legacy.
326
00:16:11,817 --> 00:16:14,067
What legacy would
that be again?
327
00:16:14,067 --> 00:16:15,817
Well, I just met
your mother,
328
00:16:15,817 --> 00:16:18,650
and she showed me
a picture of her
in that very same gown
329
00:16:18,650 --> 00:16:20,150
at her cotillion.
330
00:16:20,150 --> 00:16:22,025
Uh, I'm sorry, ma'am.
331
00:16:22,025 --> 00:16:23,817
I think you might
be mistaken.
332
00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:25,983
Oh, no, I am
quite sure.
333
00:16:25,983 --> 00:16:29,567
Your mother
is a former Miss Debutante,
334
00:16:29,567 --> 00:16:32,942
as was your grandmother
and great-grandmother
before her.
335
00:16:32,942 --> 00:16:36,567
That makes you
a fourth-generation debutante.
336
00:16:36,567 --> 00:16:39,358
Wait. So I too got four
gene-ray-rays
337
00:16:39,358 --> 00:16:41,400
up in this piece?
338
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:43,525
I mean...
339
00:16:43,525 --> 00:16:45,192
yes, I realize that.
340
00:16:45,192 --> 00:16:47,025
Oh.
341
00:16:47,025 --> 00:16:50,692
In fact, I'm startin'
to realize a lot of things.
342
00:16:57,067 --> 00:17:00,858
Aspiring to save the world
isn't easy.
343
00:17:00,858 --> 00:17:04,025
Yes, I could donate
millions and millions
344
00:17:04,025 --> 00:17:06,483
and millions
from my trust fund.
345
00:17:06,483 --> 00:17:09,650
But instead,
my life's mission
346
00:17:09,650 --> 00:17:13,483
is to inspire others
to give.
347
00:17:13,483 --> 00:17:15,983
Apparently, they take
this whole speech nonsense
348
00:17:15,983 --> 00:17:18,525
very seriously.
349
00:17:18,525 --> 00:17:21,025
So I have a few index cards
Gladys made for you.
350
00:17:21,025 --> 00:17:23,317
Oh, don't worry, Mother.
351
00:17:23,317 --> 00:17:25,983
I wouldn't wanna let...
Gladys down.
352
00:17:28,692 --> 00:17:30,067
Thank you, Kitten.
353
00:17:30,067 --> 00:17:33,275
You speak beautifully
in public.
354
00:17:33,275 --> 00:17:35,067
Obviously, she's read
my book,
355
00:17:35,067 --> 00:17:39,108
How To Speak
Beautifully In Public.
356
00:17:39,108 --> 00:17:41,067
By the way,
it is available in the lobby.
357
00:17:41,067 --> 00:17:43,858
[Miss Holley's voice]
Cash only.
358
00:17:43,858 --> 00:17:47,067
Next, we will hear from
Miss KC Cooper.
359
00:17:52,733 --> 00:17:54,233
[sighs]
Thank you, everyone.
360
00:17:54,233 --> 00:17:56,108
My name is KC Cooper,
361
00:17:56,108 --> 00:17:58,900
and for my speech,
I'm going to need
362
00:17:58,900 --> 00:18:01,108
a bit of assistance
from Miss Holley.
363
00:18:01,108 --> 00:18:03,483
- Miss Holley.
- Yes.
364
00:18:03,483 --> 00:18:07,317
Pull my finger.
365
00:18:12,983 --> 00:18:15,067
Oh, Judy.
366
00:18:17,150 --> 00:18:20,858
Ernie, I've lost
interest in this whole game.
367
00:18:20,858 --> 00:18:23,108
If you want to be
in charge so bad,
368
00:18:23,108 --> 00:18:26,108
fine, you're in charge.
369
00:18:26,108 --> 00:18:28,067
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no.
370
00:18:28,067 --> 00:18:31,358
I don't need
your pathetic little handouts.
371
00:18:31,358 --> 00:18:33,150
All right,
sometimes I do.
372
00:18:33,150 --> 00:18:34,942
But not this time.
373
00:18:34,942 --> 00:18:36,942
I finally figured out
the one thing
374
00:18:36,942 --> 00:18:39,317
- you can't beat me at.
- Losing?
375
00:18:39,317 --> 00:18:41,108
Uh, no.
376
00:18:41,108 --> 00:18:42,817
An eating competition.
377
00:18:42,817 --> 00:18:45,817
That's not fair.
I don't eat.
378
00:18:45,817 --> 00:18:48,317
Oh, that's right.
379
00:18:48,317 --> 00:18:49,942
I forgot.
380
00:18:49,942 --> 00:18:51,317
Robots don't eat.
381
00:18:51,317 --> 00:18:53,525
So what I'm hearing is...
382
00:18:53,525 --> 00:18:55,150
I win!
383
00:18:55,150 --> 00:18:57,108
That's right, winner winner,
chicken dinner,
384
00:18:57,108 --> 00:18:58,650
which you also can't eat.
385
00:18:58,650 --> 00:19:01,442
[choking]
386
00:19:05,567 --> 00:19:09,150
Hey, looks like
you can't eat either.
387
00:19:09,150 --> 00:19:11,025
Guess it's a tie.
388
00:19:15,650 --> 00:19:18,067
And finally, I'd like
to present
389
00:19:18,067 --> 00:19:20,775
our debutantes
to society.
390
00:19:20,775 --> 00:19:23,817
Evelyn Merkintosh
of Bridgeport, Virginia.
391
00:19:26,983 --> 00:19:32,192
KC Coretta Scott Cooper
of Arlington, Virginia.
392
00:19:45,983 --> 00:19:47,483
What happened to you?
393
00:19:47,483 --> 00:19:50,983
You look like you got
into a fight with a cat.
394
00:19:50,983 --> 00:19:51,942
And the cat won.
395
00:19:53,275 --> 00:19:55,483
Mom, I completed
our mission.
396
00:19:55,483 --> 00:19:57,275
What are you
talkin' about?
397
00:19:57,275 --> 00:19:58,983
Remember Kitten Van Camp?
398
00:19:58,983 --> 00:20:01,983
She and her mother
were the undercover spies,
399
00:20:01,983 --> 00:20:04,067
but it's okay,
'cause I took care of them.
400
00:20:04,067 --> 00:20:05,192
You took care of them?
401
00:20:05,192 --> 00:20:06,942
Yeah, I took care of them.
402
00:20:06,942 --> 00:20:08,983
Wiped 'em out,
eliminated 'em.
403
00:20:08,983 --> 00:20:10,442
They're swimming
with the fishes.
STYLE
::cue()
404
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:15,108
I don't really know
all the technical terms for it,
405
00:20:15,108 --> 00:20:17,608
but rest assured,
we won't be hearing from them
406
00:20:17,608 --> 00:20:19,817
for a long time.
407
00:20:20,983 --> 00:20:22,442
Like forever.
408
00:20:22,442 --> 00:20:25,192
You eliminated
Kitten and her mother?
409
00:20:25,192 --> 00:20:28,900
Yeah, and this janitor
who just walked in
at the wrong time.
410
00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:30,983
But it was kind of
convenient, because
he had a mop.
411
00:20:32,650 --> 00:20:34,233
Oh, baby, no!
412
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:37,067
Oh, Mama, yeah.
413
00:20:37,067 --> 00:20:39,650
Why... why would you
do that?
414
00:20:39,650 --> 00:20:41,358
I had no choice.
415
00:20:41,358 --> 00:20:43,275
I got an email
telling me to from Gladys.
416
00:20:43,275 --> 00:20:45,650
From Gladys?
There is no--
417
00:20:45,650 --> 00:20:47,483
Presenting
Kitten Van Camp
418
00:20:47,483 --> 00:20:49,900
of Manassas, Virginia.
419
00:20:55,067 --> 00:20:56,983
When did you figure it out?
420
00:21:00,817 --> 00:21:03,900
Well, I had a little
chitchat with Miss Holley
421
00:21:03,900 --> 00:21:06,025
and she told me all about
my legacy,
422
00:21:06,025 --> 00:21:07,858
although I should've known
something was up
423
00:21:07,858 --> 00:21:12,108
when we went undercover
using our real names.
424
00:21:12,108 --> 00:21:13,525
Oopsie.
425
00:21:15,317 --> 00:21:17,317
Honey, I'm so sorry.
426
00:21:17,317 --> 00:21:18,900
It's just that
this cotillion
427
00:21:18,900 --> 00:21:21,567
is something I always wanted us
to experience together.
428
00:21:21,567 --> 00:21:23,317
Mom, why didn't you
just tell me?
429
00:21:23,317 --> 00:21:25,067
Don't you think
I would've done it?
430
00:21:25,067 --> 00:21:27,942
Okay, don't you think
I would've done it
431
00:21:27,942 --> 00:21:30,900
once I realized
how important it was to you?
432
00:21:30,900 --> 00:21:32,858
Okay.
433
00:21:32,858 --> 00:21:34,775
Don't you think I would've
done it once I realized
434
00:21:34,775 --> 00:21:37,108
how important it was to you
and you guilted me into it?
435
00:21:37,108 --> 00:21:40,525
Okay, yeah, I'm startin'
to see why you tricked
me into it.
436
00:21:42,942 --> 00:21:45,692
Sweetheart, I'm sorry.
437
00:21:45,692 --> 00:21:48,067
It's just that you're
growing up so fast.
438
00:21:48,067 --> 00:21:51,775
I want to savor
these moments while
I still got 'em.
439
00:21:51,775 --> 00:21:53,983
It's okay.
I love you, Mom.
440
00:21:53,983 --> 00:21:55,567
I love you, too, baby.
441
00:21:57,983 --> 00:22:01,067
And now,
our Miss Debutante
442
00:22:01,067 --> 00:22:05,817
of the 104th Chesapeake,
Virginia, cotillion is...
443
00:22:05,817 --> 00:22:09,108
KC Coretta Scott Cooper.
444
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:13,942
That's my girl!
445
00:22:13,942 --> 00:22:16,775
I mean, congratulations.
446
00:22:18,817 --> 00:22:22,025
I won? How in the heck
did I win?
447
00:22:22,025 --> 00:22:23,358
Sweetheart, you inherited
my genes.
448
00:22:23,358 --> 00:22:25,067
It's in your DNA.
449
00:22:25,067 --> 00:22:28,983
Huh. Guess I'm a little more
sophisticated and classy
450
00:22:28,983 --> 00:22:30,858
than I give myself
credit for.
451
00:22:30,858 --> 00:22:33,067
You sure are, baby.
452
00:22:33,067 --> 00:22:36,733
I can't believe
my baby won.
453
00:22:36,733 --> 00:22:39,233
Why not? You paid
to make it happen.
454
00:22:39,233 --> 00:22:41,608
And by the way...
455
00:22:41,608 --> 00:22:44,150
[both] Cash only.
456
00:22:49,942 --> 00:22:52,358
I still think you
could've helped me with this.
457
00:22:52,358 --> 00:22:53,817
It was a tie,
458
00:22:53,817 --> 00:22:55,525
so technically,
we're both in charge.
459
00:22:55,525 --> 00:22:59,192
Ernie, does it really
matter who's in charge?
460
00:22:59,192 --> 00:23:02,108
No, I guess not.
461
00:23:04,317 --> 00:23:05,650
Wow, this place
looks great,
462
00:23:05,650 --> 00:23:07,692
like cleaner than
when we left.
463
00:23:07,692 --> 00:23:10,317
Ernie, did you move out
for the weekend?
464
00:23:10,317 --> 00:23:12,608
Oh, leave him alone.
He did a good job.
465
00:23:12,608 --> 00:23:15,650
I knew I was right
to leave you in charge, baby.
466
00:23:15,650 --> 00:23:18,483
I was in charge?
467
00:23:19,983 --> 00:23:21,400
I was in charge?!
468
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:23,025
Judy!
469
00:23:23,025 --> 00:23:25,025
[nervous laughter]
470
00:23:25,025 --> 00:23:27,067
Look at that.
471
00:23:27,067 --> 00:23:28,817
Looks like
I made a mistake.