Kids?
Anybody home?
Anybody?
Okay, new Goldie.
This is your home.
Full disclosure:
something bad did happen
to the previous tenant.
There we go.
[kids chattering indistinctly]
- Hi, Dad.
- Nothing!
What's in your hand?
[scoffs]
Like I said, nothing.
What about the other hand?
[clears throat]
Nada.
I'm sold.
Let's see both hands.
Hey, Dad, jazz hands!
[screaming]
Aah!
Jazz hands!
I always fall for jazz hands.
- Goldie?
- Uh, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
This is Goldie.
Why is he in a bag?
I was just taking him
for a walk.
He likes to see the koi pond
at the mall.
Dad.
Okay, I like to see
the koi pond at the mall.
Dad!
[sighs]
Fine.
Listen, sweetie,
I have to tell you something.
[clears throat]
Goldie swam
his last lap, kiddo.
And I didn't want
to upset you,
so I was just trying to
replace him before you got home.
So Goldie's really gone?
I forget.
Is this Goldie #7
or Goldie #8?
W-w-wait. Goldie's been gone
before?
Seven times?
Oh, right.
We're not supposed
to tell Dawn
about all the fish
that we flushed.
- W-w-w-wait.
You guys
all knew about this?
Since when?
Since Goldie #3.
Remember her?
[all sighing]
I cannot believe you guys.
How could you keep this
a secret from me?
'Cause we didn't
want you to feel bad.
And now you feel bad.
So we were right.
At least we have Goldie #8,
who'll live forever!
Uh, Dad...
We've got a floater.
He never even got to
see the koi pond.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
[whistling melody]
♪ ♪
[rhythmic clapping]
♪ One, two, three, four! ♪
[whistling melody]
♪ ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na, na-na ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na,
na-na ♪
- ♪ One, two ♪
- ♪ Na, na, na ♪
♪ One, two, three, four! ♪
[laughter]
What are you chuckleheads
laughing about?
Let me guess.
It's a secret
and you can't tell me.
Oh, no,
it's not a secret.
We were just laughing
about how you didn't know
about all
those replacement Goldies!
[boys laughing]
I guess you had to be there.
And not be you.
Hey, quadalupes.
Since we had some problems with
Goldies 1 through 8,
I'd like you to meet, Mike.
Mike?
I don't know if
Mike's a bird name.
- [squawking]
Mike's a bird name.
See?
Sweet!
He talks.
- Doodie.
[laughs]
He said doodie.
So is this the original Mike
or Mike #2?
- [squawks]
Number two.
[laughs]
He said number two.
We should've gotten this bird
six fish ago.
- Tom, you said you were going
to get a new fish.
Why does Goldie #9
have feathers?
And a beak?
And is not a fish?
His name is Mike, and before
you say anything negative, you
should know that I can't get my
money back.
Well, Mike is not staying
in our house.
- [squawks]
Pretty lady, pretty lady.
Oh.
But Michael can.
- Are these part of
your new clothing line, Mom?
They're awesome.
Thanks.
You kids inspired me.
You wear out your clothes
so quickly I wanted to make
something that could
stand up to the quadnado.
Ooh, I'm calling it...
HarperArmor.
I can't wait to rock it
at the fashion show.
What fashion show?
Mom's having a fashion show.
She is?
And we're going to be
the models.
We are?
We totally talked about this
at the sundae bar.
Whoa, whoa, wait.
Sundae bar?
Yeah, Dad always gets it for us
after we lose a goldfish.
all: Oh.
So we're going
to be models.
Some of us.
They're children's
clothes, Tom.
I'm just saying.
I'm no stranger
to the modeling game, man.
You were a foot model, Tom.
A "before" foot model.
My toe fungus paid for the power
windows in your minivan.
And I can still bring the heat
to the catwalk.
Check out my sizzle.
Judging by that walk,
I think his fungus is back.
I heard that.
So...a goldfish
and a fashion show?
Anything else I don't know?
Ooh, you forgot about
the sundae bar.
What happened to us?
We never had secrets
from each other.
We used to have
a circle of trust,
but now that's broken.
What we need
is a quadfession session.
What's a quadfession session?
- All right, boys.
The quadfession session
has officially begun.
Still don't know
what it is.
If we're going to
trust each other
we need to wipe the slate clean
and start over.
So we need to confess
our deepest, darkest secrets.
That'll make us even
and rebuild the circle of trust.
This is a waste of time.
We don't keep secrets
from each other.
Oh, yeah?
Every night at dinner,
when you're not looking,
Dicky takes a sip of your milk.
But you know I don't like
sharing glassware!
And that's why he does it.
He thinks it's funny.
And it is.
Yeah, well, Ricky, remember when
you "lost" your lucky ruler?
Leonardo Da Inchy?
Well, he's not lost.
- Dicky threw him away.
- What?
I tried to measure my tongue
and threw up on it.
Doesn't feel good to be lied to,
does it, Ricky?
No.
That's why we need this.
So don't hold back.
What's said in the circle
stays in the circle.
Trust each other.
Nicky, you're up.
Okay...
As you all know,
I have a very deep
bellybutton.
Well, I store raisins
in there.
For what?
It's a healthy snack
for when I'm on the go.
You have any in there now?
I have three regulars
and a golden.
Sometimes I like to close
my eyes and surprise myself.
Come on, golden.
Yes.
Wow.
All right, my turn.
[exhales slowly]
I'm a stress-knitter.
A what?
When I'm stressed out,
I knit.
Grandma taught me and
I've been doing it for years.
So any time you see
a sweater on the dog,
it came from
these very nervous hands.
You got skills, bro.
Okay, my turn.
[exhales heavily]
I still have
an imaginary friend.
His name is DJ.
He's a DJ.
And he plays oontzing music
only Dicky can hear.
That explains the headbobbing.
And the fist pumping.
And your math grade.
Okay, Dawn, you're up.
We all went.
Okay.
But you can't make fun of me.
You're safe in the circle.
[sighs]
Okay.
[exhaling heavily]
Here we go.
You guys know Mack?
I know I said I only
like him as a friend,
but I think I might actually
sorta like him-like him.
Wow.
That took a lot of guts.
Yeah.
Sure did.
Please let us
make fun of you, please.
Fine.
You've got five seconds.
[singsong]
all: Dawn loves Mack!
Dawn loves Mack!
Okay.
Time's up.
See?
Our circle of trust
has been restored.
Hey!
Starting now.
[laughs]
That may be the cutest little
knit-hat I have ever seen.
Where did you guys get it?
Pet store.
But it fits so perfectly.
Almost like it was hand-knit
just for his little bird head.
It's a hat, Josie.
Get over it.
Hey, Nicky,
I'm kinda hungry.
You got any 'sins
in your snack hole?
Pack your own snack hole.
That's cold, bro.
You know I'm an outie.
Best I can do is
an onion ring.
Honey, I know your clothes
are for kids.
- Because they are.
- But before you rule me out--
Already have.
Hey, kids, come here!
I need to measure you
for the show.
Hey, hey, check out
some of my runway skills, huh?
I give you Simon LeTom,
because I'm...
hungry like the wolf.
[barking, howling]
[screaming]
[thudding]
One of these days,
he's actually going to be hurt.
(Tom)
It's today!
Oh, oh!
- Hey, Dawn.
- Hey, Mack.
Do you know what chapter
Mr. Williams wanted us
to read for tomorrow?
[laughter]
Are they laughing at us?
all: Dawn loves Mack!
Dawn loves Mack!
That's funny.
My name's Mack.
Oh.
Yeah.
Well, catch you later.
What are you doing?
Enjoying our sweaters.
I feel like
a sea captain!
I knitted those
in confidence.
They're not
"out-and-about" sweaters.
They're "relaxing at home in
the circle of trust" sweaters.
Dude, don't worry.
Your secret is safe.
No one's gonna break
the circle of trust.
All right, who broke
the circle of trust?
What are you talking about?
One of you little
sweater-wearing snitches
told my secret and now everyone
in the hallway's going...
[whispers]
"Dawn loves Mack."
- I didn't say anything.
- Me neither.
- Wasn't me.
Okay.
So no one's gonna admit it?
Well, unless someone
tells me...
You boys know
what a text blast is?
When you text
on the toilet?
No.
It's when I text everyone
in the school at the same time.
"Attention, everyone.
"Nicky Harper keeps raisins
in his bellybutton."
- "And eats them."
- [gasps]
"Dicky Harper's best friend
is a DJ..."
- "And is imaginary."
- [gasps]
"And Ricky Harper
is a strong knotter."
[gasps]
Wait, that's not
that bad.
"Stress-knitter."
Stupid autocorrect.
[gasps]
Okay.
Thumb's on send.
Last chance to admit
who did it.
Dawn, please don't.
Whoever did it, fess up.
- It wasn't me.
- Me either.
All right.
You made your choice.
- In 3, 2--
all: No!
[phone chimes]
[phones chiming]
[laughter]
Dude, how 'bout knitting up
a little raisin pouch
for your bro?
Oontz, oontz, oontz.
What have you done?
I never want to knit again.
And yet I need
to knit so badly.
And in case you're wondering,
DJ the DJ is playing
a very sad song.
[sadly]
Oontz...
[choking up]
Oontz.
Now you know how I feel.
What is a four-letter word for
a baseball pitcher's error?
[squawks]
Ball.
Ah, nice.
Hey, the fashion show is
coming together, Tom.
This could be, like,
really big for the store.
Turn that "could" into "will"
with "America's Next Tom Model."
Hey, Mike, will you tell Tom
he's not a model?
[squawks]
Not a model, not a model.
But I do need an emcee
for the show!
- Mike...
- [chirps]
Tell her I'm in.
[squawks]
I'm in.
Excuse us, Mike.
Just me, right?
Come help me get the clothing
racks out of the garage.
- Yes, I'm in.
- Leave the bird.
Pretty lady, pretty lady.
- I know that's you, Tom.
- [groans]
Dawn, I can't believe
you text blasted our secrets.
Yeah, the whole school
is laughing at us.
When you break the circle,
you get treated like a jerkle.
Mike, you would not
believe my day.
Thanks to one of
my blabbermouth brothers,
everyone at school
now knows that--
[singsong]
Dawn loves Mack.
Exactly!
Wait, what?
[squawks]
Dawn loves Mack.
(Mike)
Dawn loves Mack.
all: [singsong]
Dawn loves Mack.
Oh, no.
And you were in the store
with the kids from school.
It was you!
You're the blabberbeak!
[boys yelling
in the next room]
[groans]
They're mad at me.
But I'll just explain it to them
and they'll understand.
Mm-hmm.
Circle of trust, she said.
Quadfession session, she said.
And now I've dropped a stitch!
I can't believe this.
Now everyone's
gonna think I'm weird.
And on top of that,
I'm out of raisins!
- This is all Dawn's fault.
- Yeah!
You know what?
Now that I think about it,
maybe it's not!
- Yeah!
Wait, what?
Dawn's the one who brought us
together.
She's the one who tried to fix
the circle of trust.
And everything was good,
till one of you two jerkles
broke it!
You mean one of you two jerkles!
No, one of you two jerkles!
Well, whichever jerkle broke
the circle is out of the quads!
[all snarling]
Yeah, I'm not so sure
they'll understand.
This is so exciting, Tom.
I am so proud of you.
Break a leg.
You too.
Ooh!
[laughs]
[clears throat]
Welcome aboard, fashion-gers.
This is your pilot speaking.
So go ahead and fashion
your seat belts
because HarperArmor
is about to take off!
What are you doing?
I'm just trying to
find my fashion show voice.
Now?
Right before the show?
Up on that catwalk,
I know who I am.
Down here, I'm just a guy
with a microphone.
Okay.
Okay, okay.
Hey, pull yourself together,
Tom.
[in a German accent]
How about I try
a German accent?
No!
No accents.
Ugh, this is my show.
Okay, Josie, two minute warning.
Copy that, Mrs. Harper.
Um, what's up
with your brothers?
[growling and grunting]
Nothing!
Like all supermodels,
they're just hungry.
I hope that's all that is,
'cause your Mom put
a lot of work into this show.
Hey, fellas.
Look what I've got.
It's a circle of crust.
So let's stop fighting
and start biting.
- [growling]
- No, no, no, no!
Not each other!
[Jamaican accent]
Hey, mons and lady mons!
Dis be da debut of
Anne Harper's HarperArmor!
Active wear for da boys
and da girls.
- You're done, mon.
- Move up.
They're about to start.
Don't poke me.
That's not poking.
This is poking.
Oh, you want to poke.
Hey!
Why do I get poked?
[grunts]
- Hey, guys!
I thought maybe we could
start all over again.
I have a quadfession to make.
So...look what I brought!
Okay, so--
Great idea!
[gong reverberates loudly]
[laughter]
First up,
we have Dicky Harper.
Dicky's ensemble works
just as well on the field
as it does in the classroom.
That's classic HarperArmor
versatility.
Next we have Ricky Harper,
dressed in sporting casual wear.
Ricky's ready to go
from athlete to mathlete.
And since it's water resistant,
he could also be a bath-lete.
Whatever Ricky chooses,
this outfit is an A+.
And now let's bring out
Nicky Harper.
Ooh!
In this casual skater look,
Nicky is ready
to hit the halfpipe...
And not his brother.
(Anne)
See, folks, this is
where style meets function
at the HarperArmor junction.
Guys, listen,
I have to tell you something.
Not now, Dawn.
And now, one last time,
HarperArmor for him.
I'm first.
[grunting]
I'm first. Trust me.
I don't trust you.
I don't trust
either of you.
What are they doing?
- No!
- What is she doing?
Don't be alarmed, folks.
(Anne)
This is just a demonstration
to show just how durable
HarperArmor is.
Man, that stuff's a-durable.
[cheers and applause]
Please!
Guys, please stop fighting.
You're interrupting
our triangle of hate.
It's like
the circle of trust,
but it can jab you
from all three sides.
I was the one who broke
the circle of trust!
You're the jerkle?
Yes, I'm the jerkle.
all: Huh.
Get her!
Now what do I do?
All my models are gone.
Not all of them.
You get out there
and show them your sizzle.
As you can see, HarperArmor
is so versatile
that even a grown man can fit
into a boy's size medium.
It's a small.
[cheers and applause]
So it was you who broke
the circle of trust?
Yes.
It was me.
- [squawks]
It was me.
- Well, technically
he's right.
Mike told everybody about Mack,
but I didn't know it
until after I text blasted
your secrets.
I should've trusted you.
I'm sorry.
Doesn't matter.
The damage is done.
Our secrets are out there
running wild.
Not for long.
What are you doing?
A text blast got us
into this, so...
maybe one will get us out.
[sighs]
"Attention, everyone...
"I was mad at my brothers,
"so I made up
all those things about them.
"The only Harper secret
that is true is...
Yes, I do like-like Mack."
Dawn, you don't
have to do that.
- Yeah, she does.
- She totally does.
[phone chimes]
[phones chiming]
Oh.
[laughs]
A girl likes you.
What's that like?
- Thanks.
- Is the circle of trust
repaired?
All four corners.
Good enough.
Now let's bring this home.
[cheers and applause]
Mom, come on up.
Come on, please.
- Come on!
- Come on, Mom!
- And 3, 2, 1!
- ♪ ♪
- [whistling melody]
♪ ♪
- [vocalizing]
♪ Yeah ♪
[vocalizing]
♪ Yeah ♪
- ♪