♪
Hey, what'd you guys get
for number two?
- I got four.
- I drew a head.
Well, my life
is officially over.
My whole class saw...
"it."
[all gasp]
But you've always been
so careful with it.
And always made sure
to hide it.
And yet,
there it was.
[laughs]
You carry around
a stuffed animal?
[laughter]
Lieutenant Blue Beary
is not just a stuffed animal.
[scoffs]
I mean...
no.
[laughter]
So that's it.
I'm giving up Blue Beary.
Yeah, right. He's helped you get
straight As on every test since
pre-K.
You can't give him up.
Well, I can give him up
easier than you can give up
taking a bath
with your little rubber duck.
I don't need to take a bath
with Ducky,
I choose to.
I enjoy our talks.
You talk to him like this,
"Quack, quack, quack, quack."
Yeah.
He's a duck.
And what about you,
Mitten Man?
You still sleep with your
baby mittens on your fingers
and then rub your cheeks
and your earlobes.
- I don't rub the lobes anymore.
Just the cheeks.
- Lobes and cheeks?
What did I walk in on?
[sighs] These guys still have
their security items
from when they
were babies.
Kids.
Oh, you mean,
security thingies
like this?
That is a sweat towel
for soccer.
Then why does it say,
"Dawn's Blanky?"
Hey, guys,
your childhood
security items are nothing to
be embarrassed about.
When I was a kid,
I had a Princess Suzie doll
until one day
she was sunbathing,
and my dad ran her over
with our lawn mower.
She was always there for me.
[sobs]
But I wasn't there for her!
[singsongy]
Issues.
[sighs]
Wow.
Glad I'm not that attached
to Blanky.
What do you mean?
You couldn't go a day
without Blanky.
And you three
couldn't go an hour
without your little
security thingies.
Care to make it interesting?
Whoever can go the longest
without their bear, duck,
blanket or mittens gets to have
the others do their chores
for a month.
Who's in?
[scoffs]
Easy.
Get ready to do my chores,
losers.
You mean mine.
[sighs]
You don't stand a chance.
The contest is on.
Or should I say
Quadtest.
I was just gonna
say that!
Dang it!
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
[whistling melody]
♪ ♪
[rhythmic clapping]
♪ One, two, three, four ♪
[whistling melody]
♪ ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na, na-na ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na,
na-na ♪
- ♪ One, two ♪
- ♪ Na, na, na ♪
- ♪ One, two, three, four ♪
- ♪ Na, na-na ♪
[upbeat music]
- Okay, your mother and I
will keep your
security items
in this locked trunk
for the duration
of the Quadtest,
and we'll check on them
every day to make sure there's
no cheatsies.
Oh, you've had these things
since you were babies,
so if at any point,
you want them back,
you just come and ask
one of us.
But you will be
eliminated.
- Any point,
just ask.
- Eliminated.
- They get it, Tom.
They hired me
to be tough, Anne.
No one hired you.
You followed us
up here.
Just open the trunk.
Fine.
- So long, Lefty and Righty.
Thanks for warming my hands
and my heart.
[kisses]
You be good, now.
[sighs]
You were always there for me,
Blanky.
Now it's time for me
to tuck you in.
Sweet dreams.
Be brave.
Quack, quack, quack?
Quack.
You've served me well,
Lieutenant.
At ease.
♪ And I--I ♪
- Stop it.
- I'm sorry.
I'm just so sad.
[sighs]
- Who wants soup?
- Yeah, let's go.
- Yeah.
- Soup sounds good.
- I'm actually pretty
proud of them.
It's hard to let go
of things.
Yeah.
You know, maybe we should
let go of a few things.
[chuckles]
This is a mess.
Ooh.
Well, how about we start
by getting rid of that old noise
box?
Maybe there's a different
old noise box that needs to be
gotten rid of.
Tom.
What?
I mean that one over there.
I use Squeezie
all the time.
[plays discordant chord]
Jeez. The last time you used
that thing was for your failed
Italian wedding band, That's
Tom-more.
[coughs]
I would not
say failed.
We booked two weddings and one
very meshugenah bar mitzvah.
Uh-huh.
But since you want to
get rid of stuff,
how about your old
waffle maker?
Well, how about...
this ridiculous
motorcycle getup?
Let's not be throwing
"ridiculous" around
when you still have
a hair crimper.
Hey,
crimping's coming back, dude.
Don't--
[plays note]
This is mine.
Seriously, Tom?
You're hurting Squeezie.
♪ ♪
- Nicky, we're all waiting
in the car.
We're gonna be late
for school.
- I'm up.
I'm up.
I'm just doing some
close-eyed thinking
about how you're gonna be
doing all my chores.
Or were you having trouble
last night sleeping
without your little
baby mittens?
You know what would
fix that?
Your little
baby mittens.
It's only a matter
of time, Nicky.
[singsongy]
♪ You know you want them ♪
Nice try, Dawn,
but I'm not gonna cave.
I'm totally fine.
♪ ♪
Aw, dude,
you reek.
I don't know what
you're talking about.
I'm talking about you being
afraid to have a bath
without your duck.
No, I meant what does
"reek" mean?
Oh.
Hey, Molly,
look, I might be bad
at math,
but one thing
I do know is,
you and I add up.
[sniffs]
You reek.
What is this,
Make Up a Word Day?
It means you stink.
[sniffs]
Ooh.
That's got to sting.
[gasps]
Release the quacken.
Quack, quack.
[woman]
All righty, everyone,
I hope you came prepared.
Good luck on your tests.
[Ricky voice-over]
All right, you do do this.
It's not like Lieutenant
Blue Beary took the tests.
You did.
Now just sharpen your pencil
and breathe.
[pencil sharpener whirring]
[crunching]
Don't panic!
Calm down.
You can do this.
Okay, name.
Easy.
Ricky Blue Beary--
No!
Ahh!
[Dicky]
Hey, Ricky,
it's me,
Lieutenant Blue Beary.
Admit it, you need--
Ow. Paper cut.
[woman]
All right, Harper,
You've been playing
really well lately.
I'm thinking about
starting you.
Let's see what you got.
Bring it on, Coach.
[whistle blows]
[Dawn voice-over]
Whoo.
Here we go, Dawn.
You don't need Blanky.
Just focus and--
whoa.
That came in hot.
Ah, come on.
You got this.
That came in hotter!
Blanky, I need you!
Ahh!
[whistle blows]
What happened, Dawn?
Jordan, get in here.
Good thing you're just
the backup.
♪ ♪
[door squeaks]
Well,
somebody's looking good.
Oh, you like my hair?
[chuckles]
You leathered.
You crimped.
Hey, you left your phone out.
Might want to put that
in your pocket.
Ah, of course.
That's where phones go.
[strains]
Ah ha.
[strains]
[ring tone sounding]
Aren't you gonna get that?
No.
I'm just gonna press ignore.
[ringtone stops]
[woman on phone]
Tommy, is that you?
- Hi, Mom.
- [chuckles]
[woman on phone]
Is that Anne's laugh I hear?
Ah, ah, why yes,
it is Annie's laugh you hear.
Annie,
why don't you come
and say hi to mother?
Hi, Trish.
[Trish]
Did you get the sweaters
I sent for the kids?
- Ooh.
- Uh, yeah.
I did.
Listen, we may lose you.
Ouch!
I think the waffles
are done.
Oh.
It's a professional, fully
functioning waffle maker, Tom.
- Hmm.
- It'll ding when it's done.
- Sure.
- Mm-hmm.
Ding!
Ooh. There it is.
[all arguing]
Hey, hey, kids.
How's the old
Quadtest going?
Well, I feel great
without my Blanky.
And I haven't thought twice
about that bear.
And Dicky, we can all smell
how you're doing.
What are you talking about?
I smell fine.
If I smelled bad,
I'd take a bath.
Hi, boy.
[dog whimpering]
[dog barks]
[humming]
I'm out!
both: What?
I'm out of the Quadtest.
Sweet!
You dropped out
'cause of the website.
What website?
Dude,
you fell asleep so much
at school yesterday,
kids started taking
pictures of you.
And posting them on
PutStuffOnNicky.com
I dropped out 'cause
lack of sleep is unhealthy.
[gasps]
This is terrible!
And then there were three.
Soon to be just me.
I'm not gonna rhyme,
but you guys should take me
very serious...ly.
Oh, I did rhyme!
♪ ♪
[school bell rings]
Ricky,
can I talk to you a minute?
So I graded your test
and for the first time ever,
I had to use...
the red pen.
[gasps]
You know, your brother
bit a hole in his test
and he got a better grade
than you.
[gasps louder]
You know that this test is worth
50% of your grade, right?
Yes, I do.
Well, you know what? Since
you're normally such a good
student,
I'm going to let
you retake it.
[gasps]
Thank you, Mrs. Harvell!
But you only get
one retake.
Okay, whatever grade
you get this time
is final.
If I were you, bro,
I'd go back to the bear
before you ruin your life.
So, Dicky, I just found out
we're gonna be lab partners.
Sweet!
Lab partner hug.
This is the problem,
I want to be
your lab partner,
but until you stop smelling
like a big bag of farts,
that's not happening.
If I were you, bro,
I'd go back to the duck
before you ruin your life.
Beautiful morning,
huh, guys?
Since I got Lefty
and Righty back,
life smells sweet.
[sniffs]
Gimme those.
I need to smell sweet.
Oh! You reek!
- Ow! My ankle.
- Can you put any weight on it,
Jordan?
- [strains]
No, I don't think so.
Well, Harper, whatever was
wrong with you in practice
better get fixed by Friday.
You're starting against
the Mustangs.
Ooh, bad time to be in
a contest, huh?
I wish I had advice
to help you play better,
but I'm drawing
a Blanky.
I also drew a Blanky.
You'd be a better goalie
if you had your Bl--
Ow! Same cut.
♪ ♪
[Anne]
Okay, quadtestants,
who's ready
for waffle burgers?
[quack]
I'm out.
both: What?
What happened?
Two words:
big bag of farts.
So I'm out of the the Quadtest,
which means I'm in
as Molly's new lab partner.
Totally worth it.
And then there were two.
Have fun doing
my chores.
We'll just see about that.
Yeah, we--
[Italian music playing]
Do you guys hear that music?
♪ ♪
[Tom]
Bring it home. Bring it home.
Yeah!
Whoo!
Tom.
- Hmm?
- What's going on?
Oh, I just got
That's Tom-more back together.
You remember Vito and Alfredo?
Steve, Lenny.
Anyway, we'll be practicing our
accordion-based music all night.
Oh, why don't I throw
a couple of waffle pizzas
in the oven for you?
Ah, pizza.
Gee, gentlemen,
that sounds nice.
Two! Three! Four!
all: ♪ A pizza, pizza,
pizza, pizza ♪
♪ Pizza, pizza, pizza, pizza ♪
♪ Mangia, mangia ♪
♪ Love-a the pizza, yay ♪
♪ I love-a the pizza
from here to San Jose ♪
♪ From Washington
to Delaware ♪
♪ And all the way
to Tampa Bay ♪
♪ That's the way
we eat the pizza ♪
all: ♪ In the U.S.A. ♪
[Tom]
Oh, my.
♪ ♪
Worried about your
super important,
make or break,
potential life-ruining
makeup test
that's 50% of your grade?
I would be.
No, but I bet you're worried
about your big game tomorrow.
I heard the Mustangs
are the highest scoring team
in Colorado.
Those girls have thighs
like actual mustangs.
Wouldn't it be weird if Dicky
got a better grade than you
and Mom put his test on the
fridge instead of yours?
Nice try, Dawn,
but I'm not gonna cave.
It's just one test.
[Dawn]
Just one test, huh?
I wonder what celebrated
science educator Science Bob
would say about failing
just one test?
[singsongy]
Science Bob.
Hello.
Celebrator science educator
Science Bob?
What are you doing here?
Ricky, your sister told me
about your math test,
and I want you to know that
I didn't become Science Bob
by taking just one test
for granted,
especially one that was 50%
of my grade.
So you got to think about
your future, Ricky,
and don't waste it over
some silly competition.
Wake the bear.
That's really good advice.
I really appreciate it.
No problem.
Now, on to
more important things.
Uh, where are
your Stair Climbers?
I'm thinking about becoming
a slightly hunkier Bob.
Up the stairs to the left.
Up the...stairs.
Uh, yeah.
Never mind.
That was cute, Dawn,
but Science Bob isn't the only
one with good advice.
There's someone here who would
like to talk to you.
Alex!
Alex Morgan?
No way!
Hey, Dawn.
Rick emailed me about
your big game tomorrow
and how you'd rather
let your team down
than lose the Quadtest.
I--well, it's a little more
complicated than that, but--
You think I made it to the
U.S. Women's National Team
by letting my teammates down?
I'm gonna guess no.
Good answer, Rick. Make the
right play, Dawn.
Speaking of plays,
have you guys seen
Science Bob?
He was supposed to take me
to see Wicked.
Without Blanky,
you'll tanky.
Nice try,
but it didn't work.
- I'm still not gonna cave!
- Me neither!
Excuse me, where can I find
your T-ball bats?
- Oh--
[boy screams]
Excuse me,
can you do me a favor?
[Trish on phone]
Tommy, what's wrong?
[clears throat]
Nothing, Mom!
I just butt-dialed you.
I'm gonna hang up now.
Can you just press
my right cheek?
It's not what you're-- I just
have a hard time hanging up with
my Mom.
Mom, can we go to
Get Sporty-er?
Okay, this has gone too far.
We're scaring customers.
You win,
you made your point.
You can keep your accordion
and your leathers.
I'm not making a point,
Anne, I'm--
I'm stuck.
This leather's so tight,
it's fused with my body.
I can't tell where leather
stops and Tom begins.
Then why are you carrying
your accordion?
It's stuck to my zipper.
I'm a wreck, Anne!
Me too, Tom.
Our entire house smells like
burnt hair and charred waffles.
I'll throw away my attic trash
if you do.
Deal.
[both sigh]
[accordion plays chord]
Oh, come on.
♪ ♪
[exhales]
[dog barks]
What?
I can't let my teammates down.
I'm just gonna borrow Blanky
for the Mustang game
and put her back
before anyone finds out.
[exhales]
Ahh!
This is not what it looks like.
Looks like you cheated.
You can't prove that!
You're in the trunk
holding the bear.
How do you know
he's not holding me?
You're eliminated!
Yes!
It doesn't matter.
You cheated too!
You're eliminated.
All right, fine.
Either we're both eliminated,
or...
you take Blue Beary,
and I take Blanky,
we use them tomorrow and
put them back without Nicky
and Dicky ever finding out.
I would say we never
said any of this.
Said any of what?
Just to be clear,
we are making a deal right now,
right?
Yes.
Now, let's get you
out of there.
[door creaks open]
Or you in here!
[dog barks]
Shh!
I threw everything else away.
I just couldn't cut the chord.
Okay.
Here we go.
What's he doing?
Shh!
Just stay quiet.
Huh.
I thought I locked this.
Come on, buddy.
What was that?
Dad's going down
the stairs.
No, the click
before that.
Oh, that.
He totally locked us in.
[banging on trunk]
Okay, don't panic.
I know exactly
what to do.
Somebody help!
We're stuck in here!
Help!
[muffled shouting]
[Ricky]
Get your butt out of my face!
[Dawn]
Get your face out of my butt!
[muffled shouting and banging]
- What is that noise?
[banging]
[strains]
[both groaning]
[singsongy]
♪ Hey, guys ♪
This isn't
what it looks like.
It looks like
you're cheating.
[gasps]
Run!
Whoa!
[groans]
Look at us.
What are we doing?
None of us won.
I mean, we couldn't
last three days
without our bear, duck,
blanket, or mittens.
We obviously
still need them.
The Quadtest
was a bad idea.
Yeah, as long as our stuff
makes us happy,
who cares what
other people think?
- Yeah, you're right.
- I agree.
But let's still not tell
other people.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Totally.
Who wants soup?
[all]
♪ Soup, soup, soup, soup,
soup, soup, soup, soup ♪
♪ I love-a soup
from bisque to consommé ♪
♪ From navy bean to lima bean ♪
♪ And every bean along the way ♪
♪ That's the way
we eat the soup ♪
♪ In the U.S.A ♪
[upbeat music]
[whistling melody]
♪ ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪