Henry, come on,
we got to get to school.
Relax. I'm almost done.
You better not make us tardy.
I was born tardy.
My mom says
that's why my feet are so big.
Boom, done.
- What?
I just got tickets
to Valentine's Day at Club Soda.
Shut up.
For real?
Yeah, man.
Well, guess who's going
to be working there?
Wait.
What is Club Soda?
It's this cool new club
just for teens,
and they have every kind
of soda you can think of.
Uh-huh.
And I'm getting paid
five bucks an hour
to guard the door and make sure
only legit teenagers get in.
Well, me and Bianca
are way legit.
Ooh, you're taking Bianca
out on Valentine's Day?
Yeah, I am.
Nice.
How'd you ask her?
I didn't yet.
You better call Bianca
right now.
Why?
Because Valentine's Day
is tomorrow
and girls like to be
asked in advance.
Oh I think I know
how girls work.
- Up top.
- Like a mop.
What does "like a mop" mean?
I don't know,
I shouldn't have said it.
- Boo.
(choking)
Sorry.
I didn't mean to...
That's okay.
Hi.
Hey.
So chickity check it.
Two tickets, you and me,
tomorrow night.
Yeah. Valentine's Day.
That's right.
I'm going to keep saying things
until you smile.
Henry, I can't go with you
to Club Soda tomorrow.
But I bought us tickets
for Valentine's Day.
Well, you should've asked me
a week ago.
Oh, come on.
What?
You, like, wanted me
to officially ask you out?
Yes.
That's how girls work.
(coughing)
Sorry.
I just swallowed
some "told you so."
Come on, Bianca.
Someone else already
asked me to go to Club Soda
tomorrow night.
Who?
Mitch Bilsky.
Mi--
You're--
Wh--
Mitch Bilsky is all big
and mean and stupid.
And Mitch.
Well, he asked me in advance.
Sorry.
Well, Henry Hart.
Or should I call you, Fff.
Why would you call me "Fff"?
Because Fff stands for "F."
I failed my test?
Oh, yeah.
And I was just about
to tape it to your locker.
Why?
To shame you.
Look, Miss Shapen,
I can't get an F.
Well, too late, poop tart.
Okay.
Why have you been
in such a bad mood all week?
I don't have to tell you.
(gasping)
Did nobody invite you out
for Valentine's Day?
Oh, God, it shows?
(crying)
Do you have a tissue?
(crying)
I got a dollar.
Give it.
(sneezing)
Hey.
What if I could get you
a Valentine's date
with Captain Man?
You don't know Captain Man.
True, true.
But if I can find him
and get him to have dinner
with you tomorrow night,
can I re-take the test?
If you get me
a date with Captain Man
for Valentine's Day,
I will take your F
and turn it into one of these.
Okay. I'm going to try.
Henry, wait.
Your dollar.
It all just kind of happened.
My dad was
an irresponsible scientist.
I wanted an after-school job.
(Captain Man)
And by accident,
he made me indestructible.
Ah!
(Henry)
I went into this crazy store
and met
a pretty interesting guy.
I'm going to blow your mind.
(Captain Man)
Now I protect
the good citizens of Swellview
who call me...
(Henry)
And he turned out to be...
You know the name.
Captain Man! That's right,
Henry.
(Captain Man)
In time, I realized
that being a superhero
is a lot to handle alone.
He wanted some help.
(Captain Man)
I needed a sidekick.
(Henry)
I, Henry hart...
(Captain Man)
Pledge to never ever ever...
tell anyone...
That I'm Captain Man's
secret sidekick.
It is done.
(Henry)
Now we blow bubbles.
(Captain Man)
And fight crime.
(Henry)
Feels good.
(music)
Up the tube!
(Henry)
Oh, my boot.
(Captain Man)
Ha!
Are you kidding me?
That's your teacher,
Miss Shapen.
My single teacher.
Oh, I'm so surprised.
Come on.
If you have dinner with her,
she'll change
my "F" into an "A."
- Hey, I got a good idea.
What?
Why don't I have Valentine's
dinner with your mom?
No!
All right.
I'll have dinner
with Miss Shapen.
Yes!
Ooh and she loves chicken,
so feed her some chicken.
All right.
Ray, I will never forget this.
Neither will I.
Hey, look at me.
I'm Mr. Varlintine's.
Ew.
- That is bad.
- Yikes.
That's what
you're wearing for Gerta?
Oh, yes.
Gerta will love this.
Who's Gerta?
His Valentine's date,
who's actually a...
Hey, Schwoz!
What?
Our friend Henry here
waited until today
to ask a girl
out for Valentine's.
What?
That's not how girls work.
I know that now.
So, why don't you let Henry
take Gerta out
for dinner tomorrow night?
Me take Gerta?
No way.
Gerta is for Schwoz only.
Come on, just lend her
to Henry for one night.
This conversation is weird.
You don't understand.
Just call Gerta in here.
Sure.
Gerta,
(speaking foreign language)
Gerta.
I'm pretty sure
she's not my type.
She's not a she.
And I'm out of here.
(Ray)
Just relax.
Gerta is an android.
A fancy robot.
She's...
That's a machine?
Show the kid.
Gerta.
(speaking foreign language)
That's the coolest thing
I've ever seen.
(laughing)
You ain't seen nothing yet.
Really?
What's she going
to pull off next?
No. Gerta is
a shape-shifting android.
Show him.
Okay, shut up.
That did not just happen.
Did that just happen?
Hi. My name's Delilah.
Well, hey there, Delilah.
(Both)
Eh?
So, I can take her
to Club Soda tomorrow night
and no one will know she's fake?
I'm not fake, Henry.
I love you.
Well, I love you, too.
And, dude,
you take her to the club,
it'll make Bianca
so jealous.
Yeah.
Ooh, wait.
Wait for what?
If I'm going to make
Bianca jealous,
let's really go for it.
Meaning?
High school girl.
And she's got to be all, like--
I know what to do.
Well,
happy Valentine's Day to me.
Happy Valentine's Day.
Welcome to Club Soda.
Happy Valentine's Day.
Welcome to--
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
There's too much talking
in the line!
Now, just have your IDs
and tickets ready to show me.
Okay?
I'm in charge!
Welcome to Club Soda.
Happy Valentine's Day.
Hey, what up, dog?
Happy V-day.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
What?
You got to be
at least 13 to get in.
Well, we're all 14.
Wrong. I know Piper.
You're all nine.
Oh I'm not Piper.
My name is Judy Glickman.
This ID is fake, Judy.
Okay, are you going
to make this a thing?
Sorry, kid.
Rules are rules.
You better not--
Unh!
Come on, girls.
I'm still in charge!
Welcome to Club Soda.
(Jasper)
Happy Valentine's Day.
Welcome to...
Oh, hey, Char.
Hey, dude.
(Jasper)
I didn't know
you were coming here.
I wasn't planning to
until Henry told me
about his date.
Who, Bianca?
(Jasper)
She's already
in there with Mitch.
(glass breaking)
(tires screeching)
Henry found himself
another date.
Who?
I said all I can say.
Okay.
Do you have a ticket?
Well,
Nope.
Charlotte?
(music)
Hey, dude!
Dude!
What can I get you?
Soda.
Two cherry lime devils.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
These are for me.
Oh, hey, Bianca.
Oh, hi, Charlotte.
Hey, Mitch.
So, did Henry come with you?
Nah. He's...
(music)
Man, I should buy her a soda.
I just can't believe
she's not a real person.
Tiffany,
show her how many different
colors you can make your eyes.
Okay, okay.
Be normal.
Dang it.
What?
How can I make Bianca jealous
if she won't
even look over here?
Why don't you take Tiffany
out on the dance floor?
Show off a little?
Ooh, that's good.
Wait.
Maybe you should check
with Ray or Schwoz
to make sure she can
dance like a normal person.
No offense.
I'm Tiffany.
I'll call them.
(phone beeping)
Yeah, Henry, what's up?
I need to know
if Tiffany can dance.
Pfft.
She's a highly
sophisticated android.
She can do anything,
dance, fly a plane,
she's good with puppets.
Cool.
Hey, are you on your way
to pick up my teacher?
No. I sent Gooch
to get her and bring her here.
What? You can't bring her down
into the man cave.
You said we always have
to keep the location a secret.
She won't know anything.
Gooch picked her up,
put her in a sack,
and he's going
to send her down here when--
(beeping)
(screaming)
(grunting)
She's here.
I've got to go.
(Henry)
Hey, make her happy.
I need her to change
my "F" into an "A".
Yeah, blah, blah.
Bye bye.
And give her some chicken.
Yeah, chicken.
(moaning)
Ooh.
Well, hello, Captain Man.
Hello.
So...
You're going to stand there
looking handsome
or are you going to help me
out of the sack?
Oh, hey, is that chicken?
Yes.
(music)
Can you dance like that?
No.
You should take some lessons.
Uh... can I get you another
entire chicken?
Nah. I can still chew
a little more off of this one.
♪ Baby, baby, you take me back ♪
♪ There, I said it, I said it
I said it, I said it ♪
♪ Oh, baby, baby ♪
Oh, I'm sorry,
I didn't know you had company.
No, no.
Please stay.
Please.
Come meet Miss Shapen.
Sharona.
Right. Sharona Shapen,
Schwoz Schwartz.
Schwoz Schwartz,
Sharona Shapen.
Nice to meet you.
Anyone mind
if I take off my shoe?
Actually,
please don't take off your--
Oh!
That is a big toe.
Thanks.
Thank you.
How you doing, Bianca?
Okay, thanks.
'Sup, baby.
I know you're not talking to me.
Nope.
I'm talking
to this sweet thing right here.
Hey.
She's not a thing.
She kind of isShh.
Want to dance?
You came here with Bianca.
It's not polite
to dance with another girl.
It's not polite for me to dance
on you face, either.
Well, lucky for you,
my face isn't a floor.
I'll be on the dance floor
whenever you're ready.
Okay, that guy is just evil.
Yeah.
He is pretty evil.
Evil?
Evil.
Where's she...
(Henry)
Tiffany?
Hey, hey, here she comes.
Get out of here.
Oh, okay, yeah.
No, I can get down with that.
Here we go.
Here, give me your hand.
Aah!
That is a crazy dance.
- Hah!
So...
I have this sore on my back.
A sore?
- Uh-huh.
Maybe one day you can drive me
down to the wound clinic.
(phone rings)
I got to take this!
Well, who is it?
It doesn't matter.
(phone rings)
Hey, kid, what's up?
Ray, listen.
Tiffany's gone crazy.
What?
What's she doing?
Aah!
She's tossing Mitch Bilsky
around like a big bag of fudge.
I don't want to dance anymore.
She's going
to really hurt him.
Ray, how do I stop her?
You just have to press
a small red button
on the back of her neck.
Got it.
(crashing sound)
What are you going to do?
(People)
Ooh!
Where are you going?
(People)
Ooh!
(laughs)
Maybe I'll just sit down
in here for a little while.
Help me!
Look, it's Kid Danger!
(applause)
I love you, Kid Danger!
He's so dreamy.
Hen--
Kid Danger, be careful!
Thanks.
Thank you.
Obviously this girl
has severe anger issues.
She really does.
Right.
So, I'm going
to take her to therapy.
(cheering)
Well,
I better go back to my date
and her toe.
(laughing)
What's going on?
Oh, I'm just going
to take a little trip
with your boss.
My boss? Schwoz is not--
My boss, Schwoz.
Yes, okay.
He's going to take me
to the wound clinic.
They love her there.
I've heard.
Happy Varlintine's Day.
Up the tubes!
(screaming)
There's no saving this chicken.
Hey, guys.
Long line for the bathroom.
What happened?
That girl
you brought here, Tiffany.
Yeah?
She went crazy
and beat up Mitch Bilsky.
But then Kid Danger
showed up and took her down.
What?
Yep.
Wow.
Yeah, I mean, I thought...
You look really great tonight.
You have the prettiest eyes.
Okay, I'm going to go
stand somewhere else now.
Cool.
So...
You want to go out with me
for Valentine's next year?
It's a date.
Wait.
What?
You can't kiss me.
I'm still on a date with Mitch.
I wasn't going to kiss you.
I was going to bite your nose.
- Hey!
Quit biting my date's nose!
(chuckles)
(Ding)
Mmm..